#which like Valid

[thriftdyke]

it really does bother me how no one can seem to answer the question “what even is romantic attraction, really.” like some people are like “it’s who you wanna kiss and cuddle <3” and I’m like ok well kisses and cuddles can be either sexual or platonic depending on context. “It’s who you feel passion/desire/arousal for” well that just sounds like sexual attraction which you can have without even knowing somebody so I fail to see how that’s romantic. “It’s who you want to go on dates with” I go on dates with friends all the time plus “date” is a social construct anyway there’s really no innate difference between a date and hanging out. “it’s who you have deep feelings for” great news for you that can be literally any type of relationship. my friend told me she defined it as “who you wanna give roses to” and I’m like do u hear urself??? like the more I talk to people the more I’m convinced romance and romantic attraction is an elaborate socially fabricated illusion that has no real defining characteristics. and like there’s nothing Wrong with it being a constuct but why people are so attached to defending the supremacy of it is something I cannot for the life of me figure out

#like reading this u might be like ‘sounds like ur just aromantic sis’ but I’m like. listen. #ur missing my point. which is that I literally think romance Does Not Exist #at least not in this bioessentialist way people like to pretend it does #the desire for companionship and the desire for sex are biological drives. everything else is a social construct #which doesn’t mean its bad! or not valid! or anything like that! #but I’m just genuinely do not understand Why we are so bent on treating it like gospel

[bigfatbreak]

Birds of a Feather previous / next

#my art #feralnette au #birds of a feather #long tags #sorry I went apeshit in the tags #LETS SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW #I - M - A - G - OOOOOOOOO #its fun drawing marinette's back to Alya and having her appear stout and unstoppable and totally logical #and then you see her face and she's like two seconds from completely snapping and is keeping it together by a thread #as a note just because mari feels very certainly abt smth doesnt mean she's right. feelings can be valid and also irrational #in the throes of grief she decided it was better to be alone than to lose someone again so she started pulling away #and lila made pulling away very very very easy to do #shes also vaguely aware she's being unfair in pinning this on alya which is why she started spinning the drain on cockmoth again #legitimately all the shit that's happened to her wouldn't have been so catastrophic if he was never in the picture and she knows it #but the bitterness of her bestie choosing a fantastic liar over her at the worst of times stiiiiiings #alya's personal timing was bad but lila really took advantage of the fact that marinette had been acting off and weird #she basically clocked marinette as being unstable from SOMETHING and made up a lie about her #knowing she wouldn't have the strength to defend herself #between her social life going tachy bc of lila and losing fu in a way that felt like personhood death marinette was really put on the spot #and alya doing her thing of busting in there and assuming her bias is correct was a terrible combo #essentially marinette is highly unstable and alya is just realizing that #busting in and giving her a lecture when she's slightly hysterical and definitely delirious from exhaustion is NOT the way #to show her she's self sabotaging #cuz thats just gonna make her double down on self sabotaging. bc marinette will not accept that she is also a CHIIIIILD

[bottombaron]

The scarest thing about Nandor being actually smart in all things Guillermo is that this is the reason why he'll never make the move to be with him:

Nandor already knows how he feels about Guillermo.

He's not even repressing it. He's just made peace with it. Because Guillermo was never an option.

Guillermo is human. He'll choose to stay human. He's fleeting. He'll always leave in some form or fashion. Nandor doesn’t choose to act on his feelings for Guillermo for the same reason why he never turned him. It would just be a curse.

#wwdits #what we do in the shadows #nandermo #no srsly #the competence Nandor expressed this episode was off the charts #not that he's not a big dummy at heart #just that i think this is another unreliable narrative thing #we like to go “Guillermo's right there u idiot” #at Nandor #which is valid #but now im thinking that Nandor already knows probably even before the docu-crew showed up #we just all assumed he didnt consider Guillermo because hes an idiot #but hes probably already went thru the 5 stages grief over knowing Guillermo would never be with him for all eternity #and at some point hes going to have to let him go

[pokeberry5]

girl experiences gender euphoria and is immediately slammed by grief

for @litttlittt <3. this was supposed to be a portrait of caroline hill, but litta mentioned tim looking like janet when dressed as caroline and identity issues and angst and things spiraled

something about tim not knowing if he's his mother's child or bruce's or neither's.

figuring out the looks:

i wanted janet to have that poofy 70s hair

#tim drake #dc #bruce wayne #janet drake #sart #i'm picturing this as transfemme tim hence “he” and also compounding issues about bruce treating him as a daughter #which is exactly the gender validation tim wants and needs but isnt sure he deserves #but this also definitely works for trans tim #she gets to process that she looks like her mom!! and her mom will never get to know her daughter #would she have wanted to know her daughter? even though she showered tim with love when she was around #she barely knew her son #gender idk he's a girl 👍 hope that helps #i went down a rabbit hole looking up vintage dior necklaces -- hopefully something martha wayne wouldve worn #-- but dior necklaces are COMPLICATED #i almost drew pearls but i think that wouldve been too cruel to bruce lol #(a decent amount of my art--even when it's not femme tim--gets tagged 'gender' and i dont know what im going but im glad 👍)

[lastoneout]

why do people on the internet know so much about the epic of gilgamesh

#this is like the one historic thing I do not recall there being any super hugely popular modern adaptations of #so like #y'all are just fans of this ancient story #which is valid but also baffling at times #tumblr girlies will literally get their blorbos from ancient mesopotamia before going to therapy

[hyperdrama]

GAME CHANGER 6.06 Deja Vu

#gamechangeredit #dropoutedit #dropoutsource #game changer #dropout #dropout tv #sam reich #mike trapp #ify nwadiwe #siobhan thompson #game changer spoilers #~ #your fortnightly game changer set #convinced sam just does this because he likes dancing #which is valid and he should continue doing it bc it is joyful to watch #i got silly with that last gif please note the equations are not in the episode i added that myself!

[egophiliac]

his magic is so PINK and FLUFFY and PRETTY! I love it!

I'm ready to process the Diasomnias now, buckle up

#art #unique magic posters #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #meanwhile at the super awesome kalim dream base #anyway I KNEW IT! I KNEW HE WAS A DREAMWALKER! #VALIDATION #love me a unique magic that is only really useful in one extremely specific and exceedingly unlikely situation #sure was lucky that silver was on the island huh! #okay everybody i am about to be even more embarrassing than usual over anime characters. hold on. #but i am ALL OVER silver right now. just really really enjoying him! #i love that his reaction to all of this is anger. i love that his reaction to malleus is basically 'how DARE you' #my boy is full of righteous fury and he is going to make it everyone else's problem #his deeply-ingrained respect for mal and lilia is such a big part of his character that it's just. #always such a nice character moment when that breaks! #like when he yelled at lilia during endless halloween night! granted it was lower stakes then but. still. #it'sgoodstorytelling.jpg #meanwhile sebek is over in a corner sobbing and going 'what is HAPPENING' which is its own brand of deliciousness #god. this game really does just slam its fists down onto all of my personal 'I LIKE THIS' buttons. #and now they give me silver's beautiful pink fluffy cloud dream palace. find me a chef to kiss because MWAH #i can't believe they cut it off RIGHT before we were about to learn his backstory. i mean i absolutely can. but you know what i mean. #i have to know the meaning of the shitty acorn bracelet. twst. twst please.

[chaotic-carnifex]

No hold on I'm gonna make an extra post about this:

I wouldn't choose to be alloromantic

If I were given the choice to either remain aro or become alloro again, I would choose aromanticism.

And I think a lot of people need to hear that.

#aro #aromantic #actually aromantic #safeforaro #alloromantics are encouraged to reblog this #aros aren't the only ones who need to hear that our orientation isn't a consolation prize #too many ppl - both aro-specs and alloros - think that being aro is okay only bc it's not something we choose #with the implicit belief that if we COULD choose then OF COURSE we'd choose to be alloro #bc it's clearly the 'superior' option #and honestly? it's not. #they're equally valid options and which one is 'superior' depends entirely on your own needs and preferences #and my preference is *being aro* #so if you're aro and you feel like yeah sure it's OKAY that you're aro bc you DIDN'T choose this #but if you could you WOULD choose to be alloro? #well maybe being alloro really would be better for you. or maybe it's just internalized amatonormativity. #and I cannot answer for you which one it is - the only one who can is you #all I can do is raise you the OPTION that it might be amatonormativity and then leave you to consider it #so this is for the aros who need to hear that option #and for the alloros who pity us for supposedly getting the short end of the stick #we are not a tragedy

[knightingale]

The "Sansa reminds Sandor of his sister" motive that some people try to hitch to his character really just flies in the face of his actual attachments to her, doesn't it? Sansa reminds Sandor of himself. He sees the little boy who used to love knights in this girl who's been swept up by the same romanticism. He sees his abuser in her abusers, the much larger knight(s) beating on the helpless child. He sees how she is betrayed by every level of authority that should have saved her and remembers his father's neglect and Tywin and Robert's apathy for Gregor's crimes. He's protective of Sansa because he was Sansa.

And GRRM's design, that one of the strongest warriors in the series, a fearsome and cynical 6'8" guy who's "muscled like a bull" and has the face of death itself, sees himself in this soft and effeminate teen girl, and empathizes with her because he was an abuse victim too, is INFINITELY more compelling than "Oh yeah I bet she just reminds him of his sister," who he's never mentioned and who we know literally nothing about. Way to unnecessarily water down a character, you couldn't have ignored the black and white text more efficiently if you tried.

#sorry for the rant i saw this sentiment in a yt video recently #sansa stark #sandor clegane #sansan #asoiaf #and this is only one facet of why he has so much affection for her too #these people act like his attachment to her is limited to projection and not also bc she treats him like he's an actual human being #or that they can be themselves when they're with each other -that he can openly show his weakness to her and be comforted and validated #or like even just the physical attraction aspect - which is so obvious that you'd have to be willfully ignorant to miss it #how do you read him trying to kiss her and come away thinking “he thinks of her as his sister” lmfao #things that make me feel like people dont actually read the books

[spinjitsuburst]

please. please Ninjago it’d be so funny. please it’d be so funny I want this to happen so bad

#my favorite crackship that I don’t know the name for #brought to you by my server mentioning the teapot could be in the land of lost things which is a valid theory. But. #I like this better HAKAGSKDHD #jay #Nya #Jaya #nadakhan #clutch powers #Ninjago #spinjitsu screams

[heymacy]

IAN GALLAGHER + his journey with bipolar disorder

╰┈➤ “At times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning at all, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of." - Carrie Fisher

#happy world bipolar day to all my bp babies #(more thoughts at the end of the tags) #shameless #shamelessnet #shamelessedit #ian gallagher #cameron monaghan #*macygifs #bipolar disorder #hello pals how are we doin #i made this gif set in july of 2023 and never posted it because 1) i was terrified to share it and potentially see Bad Takes in the tags #and 2) because my hyperfixation was waning. and while both of those things are still mostly true (the fixation comes and goes) #i feel like it's really important to share as ian's bipolar storyline was not only so vital to his character it was a bit of representation #that isn't often given to the disorder and those (like myself) who live with it every single day #world bipolar day is a day where we can both celebrate ourselves and our resilience and also raise awareness of the reality of the disorder #which is both terrifying and beautiful at its core. this disease is not a death sentence or a sentence to an unfulfilled and miserable life #while there are challenges galore when it comes to balancing life with this disorder it IS possible to live a full and productive life #and i think it's really important to have representation of that in media - and while shameless dropped the ball on a LOT of storylines #over the years THIS is the one they really fucking nailed and i am incredibly grateful #i first started watching shameless while in the midst of a major depressive episode and i was later (finally) diagnosed during an extended #hypo/manic episode - this show and ian's storyline got me through so much and made me feel so seen and validated in my struggles #world bipolar day is also vincent van gogh's birthday (happy birthday buddy) who was posthumously diagnosed with bipolar disorder #and who experienced both depressive and hypo/manic episodes during his lifetime (and was regularly institutionalized) #it takes a lot of help and support to keep us going. it takes the support of our family and friends and *most* of all #it takes patience and kindness and understanding - which is so so so easy to give if you are willing to love and listen #so please. be willing. listen to our stories. be patient with us. show us love without conditions. support us in any way you can. #we are worth it #i promise #anyway. that's really all i wanted to say. happy world bipolar day to those who celebrate (me) and may all of us living with this disorder #go on to live happy fulfilling beautiful magical lives

[hellenhighwater]

You mentioned emotional stability, which I get, but it made me think of the meme about ‘how do you not cry when people yell at you’ and I’m wondering both: whether there’s as much yelling in law as in tv, and whether you’ve ever cried while doing law

Nowhere near as much yelling as TV!

The only people I've ever had yell at me are non-attorneys who are representing themselves and who do not understand how this whole system works, and generally speaking...they're not in a position where their yelling is hurtful? Every time it's happened it's been more like a person throwing a tantrum, and I just...can't take that seriously. No one I actually work with (or opposing counsel) has ever managed to yell at me. I have cut off a couple people who were working themselves in that direction and redirected things back to being civil.

Frankly: I will not put up with that shit.

The list of people who are allowed to yell at you in a professional setting is very, very short, and the circumstances where that is appropriate are few and far between. It does happen in some workplaces but that's a question of office culture and individual shitty temper. My boss would never yell at me--it's unprofessional--and if he did he'd have my resignation on his desk by the end of the day. Opposing counsel is not entitled to yell at me; I am their professional peer and I don't have to put up with it outside the courtroom, and if it's inside a courtroom, the judge is likely to shut that down.

We're lawyers. In this profession, it's widely seen that losing your temper is a sign that you have lost your professional regulation and it discredits your argument. That's true in and out of the courtroom.

I have come near tears in court, but mostly because if I hit a certain point of rage I will tear up. Twice, I've had a judge hand down a ruling so wildly unjust and unexpected that it threw me off balance and into immediate fury, but I've always been able to keep it together and carry on without actually crying.

Mostly the practice of law is just not that personal. Even if someone is yelling, it's not at me as an individual. I don't make the laws, I don't decide the facts, I just take these things and lay them out. If someone's mad, it's not usually a personal attack. And you learn to deal with and understand that kind of anger--often frustration--as you go.

#my lawyer parents are both of the mindset that when you lose your temper you lose the argument #which resulted in a childhood where we didn't get yelled at we got lectured #i can recall very very few occasions where either of them raised their voice at us #and like yes anger does not negate a valid argument #it is appropriate in some circumstances #but most of the time it does not make a person more credible.

[brighteuphony]

Got a bunch of Sasuke-centric asks, so here we are!

Sakura has some complicated feelings about Sasuke.

In my AU, Sakura was born to civilian parents who didn't really want her to become shinobi, even though that had been her dream for as long as she could remember- and it was no secret in the Haruno household that they were hoping she'd drop out, or at the very most, be career genin.

So Sakura never really had anyone to believe in her and had to go into the academy (late!) as a civilian-born, meaning she was automatically behind in development (and status) compared to the clan kids. (I headcanon that until the Academy, Sakura didn't ever spar with anyone, versus clan kids who had probably learned how to wield kunai before they knew how to walk).

So Sakura worked hard and did her absolute best to get the barest minimum that clan kids were afforded by default. Unfortunately, her best, without the resources/opportunities, just wasn't good enough. And Sakura knew it. Academically, she was brilliant, but that's not enough to be a good shinobi. And somewhere deep down, Sakura (at the very least Inner Sakura) knew it.

It's why I headcanon that she developed such a violent temper. People who are secure in themselves don't have such explosive, uncontrolled outbursts- it's why she picked on people like Naruto, who was probably the only person below her in the pecking order (maybe Tenten? But they're equals I guess). It's why she's so quick to anger and usually has those responses OUT of combat- it's because that's the only place her violence is actually effective.

It's also why she's such a teacher's pet- she needs validation from others to try and fill the gaping void.

So when Sasuke appeared on the radar, and everyone wanted him, so did Sakura. Because if she got him, she would do something that no one else- clan-privileged and better- could do. In fact, she staked most of her identity (her hair, her diet, her clothing) on it.

None of this was conscious. She really did have a crush on Sasuke, but the seed of it was born from a very misguided desire to prove herself on an even playing field.

After all, she didn't have a clan upbringing/resources to teach her how to find self-worth and actualization through her skills (she went home, and her civilian parents praised her for things that absolutely didn't matter in shinobi reality, amazement that she could throw a kunai! how good her grades were! and how cool it was that she could jump high!)

(and Kakashi absolutely didn't help, lol), so she defaulted to what she knew- which was being a regular girl with a regular crush.

Now, as an ~adult, she's come to the painful realization that her love for Sasuke was just a goalpost. Ironically, she set her sights on someone who would inadvertently feed into all of those insecurities, and because Sakura didn't love/believe in herself, she accepted Sasuke's abuse.

She also understands that she ran into the Chidori/Rasengan deathmatch of her own stupidity, but she just can't forgive Sasuke for leaving. For never owning up. 'Cause that's just coward behavior..

Basically, Sasuke's cruelty was just a reflection of her own self-loathing, and unfortunately, Sakura just wallowed in denial and ended up paying a hefty-ass price.

So if she ever sees Sasuke again? Honestly, she doesn't know whether she wants justice or revenge. It's complicated.

Whew- that was a text dump....

Once again, thank you so much to everyone for all the interest and asks! I'm so happy we can all share Naruto rotbrain together.

#naruto #haruno sakura #sasuke #tfw Sakura realizes that she doesn't even LIKE Sasuke let alone LOVE him #Sakura has a lot of deep seated insecurities about herself #which are all valid honestly #and she never had any teachers or family to back her up #i have no beef with SasuSaku but they're not right for each other in this AU #also no beef against Sasuke #he bby #coven!Sakura

[stuckinapril]

Lowkey glad that I’m pretty aware of the fallible nature of a young adult brain. I’ve had friends before who said things like “I’ll probably never find love ever” “I’ll probably feel this way forever” “this situation will get worse I just know it” and you can truly tell they believe that w their mind body and soul. And I can be like that sometimes too. Bc that’s just how an underdeveloped brain works, it makes you want to believe things in absolutes. But I’ve been getting so much better at combating that and being aware of when I’m getting into the incorrect mode of thinking something is 100% the truth when I don’t have nearly enough data to back it up

#like no ur probably NOT gonna be alone forever bc uve decided that at 21 after getting rejected a couple times #this is a convo I had w a guy friend & I was astounded by the conviction w which he told me this #the negativity bias is real #this is not minimizing the experiences of a young person either #the feelings r valid but the reaction can be a little out there like in this case

[static-quo]

Black ocean cold & dark // I am the the hungry shark // Fast and merciless-

Lydia // Highly Suspect

Listen I had to make this cringefail girlie serve to feel better about liking him so damn much -w-;;

#vox #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel #all the tags this took me like a week to finalize because I do not know when to stop |D #blood #-at least the implication of it anyway #something something blood and sharks n stuff #I love that he loves sharks and has a big ass aquarium despite…literally being a TV fdhdhfh #you think the water would be bad but alas the babygirl cannot resist the allure of the water puppies #which is valid btw #xD #volt’s art #also his coattails >>>>>>>>>> #im certain 90% of the reason I like him is the damn tails hjvjhfh

[krazieka2]

Assassins!! They’re friends!!!!

#I ship em tbh #I think they should open up an orphanage together #fire emblem #fe engage #2023 art #yunaka #zelkov #art like this always does worse than my dumb comics #which is absolutely not surprising btw #I too would rather retweet or reblog silly things #still it does mean I draw stuff like this a lot less in my free time #I am not immune to validation #carrying over my posts from twitter choo chooooo