#why is my brain fixating on this? idk

[silvercaptain24]

Growing up is weird

#silver rambles #vent #that post about the ‘how you knew someone else came from money’ is just. sticking with me #mostly cause as a kid I didn’t realize how bad off we were #like. I didn’t realize we got groceries from the food bank run by the church my dad worked at until I was a teen #it just. affected me subtly I guess #being worried about a $2 difference in shoes when I needed new ones because I liked the more expensive ones #and my mom having to convince me that it was fine #it still sticks with me #it’s really hard sometimes to not think about cost if my dad and I go get lunch or something #I’ve never been to another country #meanwhile my friends would go to Rome and Sweden and India and Greece and Mexico for their 12 year old trips #I stayed in the same state for the one with my mom and only went a state over for the one with my dad #but like #yeah. I always sorta knew #I just. couldn’t have told you that I knew #all the little things you didn’t know growing up #I didn’t know about the groceries thing until yeah. I was…16-17 I think #and now we’re much better off and I have my own job (technically two) but like… #hhh. #why is my brain fixating on this? idk #sorry #needed the thoughts out

[juniperarts]

I think you like pavitr.. Don't know tho, its just a theory after all.

Idk what has you thinking that.

Interesting theory tho 🤔

Curious to know why you think so

He's an ok character I guess

*looks at my icon for a split second* anyways-

Imma go draw (not Pavitr)

#why my brain do this #it just saw him that first time I watched it and went HIM #we coming up on three months now since the movie came out and I'm still fixated on atsv and this boy #Imma draw other stuff ... trust #but you dont choose your hyperfixation ... it chooses you #and momma I'm going to embrace it this time around #because I think ATSV is a decent piece of media to be a bit unhinged about 🤭 #idk maybe cause it made feel something?? #thats what my sister and I joke about when we'd say we'd seen it 7 times in the theater #it gave me a very much needed/wanted spark of inspo #drive and motivation #that Ive been lacking for almost two years now #so yeah #anon #asks

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

Just finished another hour of udg and Its so fucking funny to me that Komaeda is weirdly 4th wall savvy. I kinda brushed off him saying they disabled parts of Komaru's gun for "Game balance purposes" last time but this time he straight up called her "Ms. Protagonist" and now my brain is on fire

Also here he is. Lurking

#shut up me #udg #idk why im fixating on servant this much I really did not think this would happen #im here for tokomaru WHY IS KOMAEDA IN MY BRAIN!!!

[seventh-district]

i’ve just finished season one of TMA, and being someone who’s okay with spoilers is fun because it means i can peruse the wiki and scroll through the tag and i get to become privy to all sorts of weird, wonderful, halfway-out-of-context information that i get to look forward to understanding in the future

like. what do you mean Leitner’s in the tunnels?

what do you mean Jon eats the extinguished sun??

what do you mean it’s spelled Gerard Keay???

#Jon‚ narrating a statement: '…whose passport had identified him as Gerard Keay.' #Me‚ an American‚ not yet in the habit of following along with the transcripts: 'Ah‚ yes. Jared Key.' #tma spoilers #the magnus archives #gerry keay #gerard keay #tma #i’m sorry but Why do british ppl apparently pronounce Gerard like that how do y’all audibly tell Gerard and Jared apart #anyways based on how i’ve glossed over the other two arguably much more shocking revelations i mentioned #i’m sure you can tell that i’ve latched onto Gerry and everything else is just background noise to me #okay that’s an exaggeration. i Do love the entire show and am invested in the entire cast to varying degrees but. #Gerry… my beloved… his role in Ep. 12 hooked me instantly #it’s bad‚ guys. ive already started making him a playlist. it’s safe to say there’s no hope for me. the fixation train has left the station #Gerry (and Michael) have moved in and will live rent free in my brain indefinitely #listen. you can’t just present to me a cryptic goth man with long poorly dyed black hair and mommy issues who’s covered in eye tattoos- #-and is frequently affiliated with the supernatural and then expect me to Not fall in love with him!!! #*looks at DoorKeay* …and i am also not immune to the opposites attract & human x supernatural entity tropes… #tbh looking at all this DoorKeay fan art has me suddenly remembering my EraserMic days #which is a wild thing to say i know but listen. it’s just the whole long-black-hair x long-blonde-hair similarity #and maybe a bit of the opposite personalities. idk why but i was just admiring one particular DoorKeay fanart and it suddenly hit me #i literally whispered to myself out loud ‘holy shit it’s EraserMic again…’ and it's not Really but also it kinda is and i think it's funny #but then i did More thinking and i think it goes beyond just them. i think i rlly just have a thing for Dark & Light coded character ships #Michael & Gerry… Navia & Chlorinde... Sun & Moon… Mic & Aizawa… #i think i’m learning smthn abt myself now i’ve gotta think if there’s more examples… #i'd almost say Alphonse and Seth but eeehhh not quite. and honestly i think the bigger-brain way to see their relationship through the- #-Dark x Light trope would be to take into account the resurgence of DM!Al and that kinds flips the dynamic #i think that if either of them are Moon-coded it'd be DM!Al. but they honestly just don't quite fit in that trope's box anyways #they're Pink/Black x Brown coded. not Yellow x Black #i do gotta say that i've pulled an Interesting number of songs off Seth's playlist while working on Gerry's... it's the mommy issues innit #i'd almost say PB x Marcy but once again we've got a character that's pink-coded‚ not yellow. i think they fall into a different category

[kiisaes]

what sucks about drawing bkdk for 3 years straight is that u start to notice patterns in ur bkdk art. like how deku is always :) and bkg is always >:(. and u'd change this if u could, but this is technically canon to their characters so why fix what isn't broken. and eventually u run out of ways u can portray :) and >:( while also making the art interesting

#it also might explain why i haven't drawn bkdk a lot lately. i literally have no idea how to spice up my bkdk art #without wanting to rip my hair out due to frustration #i am 100% aware i can draw them in different expressions but it's just Different #like the art process is just Different. idk how to explain it #anyway i love being an artist with a fixation that has wrung me dry of new exciting ideas #this is not a vent btw. if my brain squints it can even be funny. hysterical even #someday ... i'll find my bkdk groove again ... my social media existence depends on it. who am i if not a bkdk artist #becki rambles about stuff #bakudeku

[podcast-hemocytoblast]

(jarchivist voice) “Statement of Cruella de Vil, regarding the dalmatians that drop kicked her mum off a fucking cliff. Statement begins. When—”

#the magnus archives #tma #jarchivist #jonathan sims #idk why my brain decided to remind me of that one trailer for the cruella de vil movie or whatever #where the dalmatians killed her mother. but i am fixated on it #it’s just. they just fucking killed her. idc what explanation the film gave for it. #i refuse to accept any explanation that’s not at least as absurd as ‘the dalmatians were possessed by karate ghosts (ghosts who know karate) #i should not be allowed to think this early in the morning. it never seems to go well.

[echthr0s]

I'm not gonna lie, at this point the main reason I keep playing Control is because I want to find Dr Darling (and find more of those in-game videos of him in the meantime) 🖤

#i'm so serious. that is my main motivation to keep playing #idk why i'm so fixated on him but Whatever Gets the Job Done!!!!! #(i do like the game and even the gameplay very much; i just have a hard time sticking with playing things that aren't my Ol Reliables yknow #(gotta hack the demand-avoidance brain by fixating on a quirky and very cute guy 🖤) #lol i went into the tags of that gifset and i see i'm not the only one who has been driven to lust-blind madness. ok good

[sugaurora]

Why do I feel like people are expecting rough asshole dom daddy Seokjin in Dream Come True? But it's actually the softest, fluffiest Seokjin I've ever written?? 😳

#writing #dream come true #i got fixated on making him the gentlest man alive and i can't let it go #mean brother's best friends are def hot but my brain didn't take it there this time idk why #probably because i was just writing indulgently and this is more a comfort fic than anything else

[opens-up-4-nobody]

hypothetical struggle between Christianity and paganism in bbc merlin? 👀 one that's very neurodivergent? 👀 do tell

Okay, so Athurian times take place in the early dark ages. Which was probably a weird time for religion in Britain. Because the Roman occupation had just come to an end, leaving behind the structure of catholicism at least with those in positions of power. But religious beliefs were still in the process of blending together with the local practices and other religions, leading to some odd gnostic beliefs. Obviously, bbc merlin doesn't talk about Christianity within Camelot but I think we can assume the catholic church would have a position at the round table. Presumably, Arthur would grow up instructed in catholic belief, go to mass, and have bishops or whatever advising him. He would rule by Devine right, sanctioned by the pope and magic would be characterized as demonic. And that somehow raises the stakes for me, imaging magical merlin within the walls of a very catholic Camelot.

I just have this image of merlin in the back of a cathedral as Arthur attends mass. Kneeling in this beautiful building, head bowed low as the congregation sings praise to a foreign God in a foreign tongue. A God that would apparently have merlin tied to a stake and burned alive. And merlin choking out his empty prayers, echoing in the verbal praise under the isolation of his nonbelief and magical association. Full of fear and venom.

The hypothetical struggle I imagine is one of catholic enforcement pushed by Arthur's religious advisors and Arthur's morality. Because Arthur is a good person and slaughtering a people on the basis religion is insane. So, what does it mean for Arthur if he stops listening to his advisors and starts accepting magic? He has to contend with a spiritual struggle, not just the secular issues presented in the show. And I would looooooove to watch that. The bending of Arthur's beliefs into something more flexible and less rigidly Christian according to the church of the time

#my knowledge on this topic in terms of historical accuracy is blurry so im im wrong: pls for the love of god correct me #but idk if arthur was catholic the entire structure of his idea of the universe would have to change if he started accepting magic #and i think that would be a super interesting transition. where would he land? would he shift to being a more gnostic style Christian? #lose his faith? idk id probably make him like my dad who thinks hell is a human construct and that all are welcom in the kingdom of heaven #and that people should just be kind to eachother. very les mis to love another person is to see the face of god #bc i loooove that idea. i find it fascinating. idk i just think religion is interesting #bc its like how ppl fundamentally understand the universe to work and that is so wild. like i can understand why it was so important in ye #oldy times lol. idk im just a bit fixated on it atm. like its the type of obsession thst feels too big for my head so its straining at the #seams. its also weird bc since its religion my brain is doing that awful thing where its questioning my interest in the topic like r u #questioning ur lack of faith? and im like bro no this is academic interest leave me alone. bc im prone to intrusive thoughts and obsessive #behavior. so thsts fun. but its not too unmanageable rn. so its interesting #idk i probably sound unhinged. lmao i headcanon ✨️ catholic!arthur ✨️ and his fall from grace in the eyes of the church rip #ay religion in not necessarily bad but human institutions are usually fucked #merlin rambling #unrelated

[teddy-bear-d]

I’ve recently started watch Impulses POV of 3rd life since I noticed a supreme lack of White Castle Duo (Impulse and Etho, specifically in 3rd life) angst fics/general content.

Oh also, I’m curious what the general fandom headcanons for those two are, so if you have any, gimme!

#white castle duo #3rd life #ethoslab #impulsesv #please #please pleaseeee #I need it #idk why but my brain has decided as of like two days ago that they are the current fixation #and there is so little #most of the white castle fics I’ve seen too are Etho forgiving Impulses betrayal #which is good and all #I like my hurt comfort #however #I want pain #I want the moment Etho looks up and sees Impulse aiming his bow right at him #I want the realization that Etho was never on Impulses priority list #I want Impulse did nothing wrong but teams formed and his kindness turned cruel anyways #I need it now

[spaceagetoon]

(Pls click for high quality and reblog, thank you!!)

BULLET TRAIN OC/SELF INSERT TIME YOOOOOO

Name: “Rose” (Quotes ARE a part of the name 😤)

Pronouns: During work She/Her, Everyday He/Him.

“Rose” is a operative the likes of Ladybug and Lemon and Tangerine. He’s FTM and started in the business before he transitioned, and once he’d transitioned he quickly realized it’s much easier to gain the trust of shifty men as a hot woman, so now he does all his work in drag.

He has an extensive history of run ins with The Twins before the events of the movie and has a odd rivalry with Tangerine specifically that often devolves into aggressive flirting.

#is there even an active fandom for this movie #I have no clue but it’s been all I can think about for the past like week #and I first saw it months ago idk why my brain decided now was the time to get hyper fixated on it #anyways read Sophisticated by Tawus on AO3 #my favorite tangerine x reader and also the best smut I’ve read in long time #my art #bullet train #bullet train fanart #bullet train movie #bullet train 2022 #bullet train OC #OC #self insert #self insert OC #cringe culture is dead #art #digital art #fan art

[midgardian-witch]

Incorrect Moon Knight Quotes

Jake: I'd love to eat steak every night but most of the time I have frozen chicken rings.

Steven: What the fuck?!

Marc: That's not real!

Jake: A chicken ring?

Marc: Get right outta town.

Steven: Can you elaborate?

Jake: It's like a chicken tender that has been bent into a circle.

Steven: Just in case you wanna wear it like a bracelet for snacking on the go?

#incorrect quotes #incorrect moon knight quotes #Yes this is a mbmbam quote #Because I have been listening to some of the older episodes that I skipped when I started listening to the podcast #Also I imagine Jake just has the worst diet because he doesn't front much and just eats what is there #Which I'd imagine is usually some kind of junk food #Steven just desperately trying to understand and make him eat a vegetable #Marc just absolutely confused by all of it #Idk why but my brain is somehow trying to combine my fixation on Moon Knight with my favorite dingdong idiot podcast #And this is what came of it

[vulcannic]

idk i’m feeling surprisingly normal about good omens s2 right now :/ maybe because i’m not an angst girly but i was originally hoping this season would reinvigorate my need to draw them and infinitely inspire me but i’m kinda just feeling like what’s the point? like i’m just ready to move on??? and i didn’t even really hate the ending as much as some people???? i think the complexities of the situation and emotions are super compelling and interesting but i just feel…… normal?? i just want to rewatch ofmd and draw pirates again idk lol

#text #good omens #good omens spoilers #like i feel no need to interact with anything involving the show until we get another season #i’m just… fine????? #it this how neurotypicals feel??? #i don’t like it tbh i was very excited to dive deep into the show and draw so much but i really don’t see the point #and i’ve already rewatched the show #and i had a dream about them last night #but like #idk #i feel weird #it sucks because good omens was my hyper fixation when the first season came out #so to feel nothing right now makes me nervous about ofmd s2 #but honestly i think another reason why GOs2 isn’t digging it’s claws in me #is because my brain is still so full of pirates #if that makes sense

[sol1loqu1st]

sorry for spiralling a little bit there, i don't really. cope well knowing that there is literally no good option and anything i do is going to make things worse

#idk why this only applies to me and not other people and i also know i'm selfish just for fixating on my own feelings but like #my brain is not good to me lol. i honestly believe that i am personally at fault for so much harm being done

[krynutsreal]

braindump incoming

ook ohMYGOF one thing I keep thinking about is like. Not a fear but like I'm getting that feeling where I'm "scared" of the fact that I might b. Be like. not getting uninterested but like .maybe kinda sorta maybe idk moving on from ishimondos even tho they mean the world to me. like maybe it's because I've been so busy I just .don't think Abt them as often maybe for some (my irl friends) it's like no way kry is healing from Dangan disease BUT I D. I CANT .I feel like I can't become uninterested when there's so SOOO much I wanted to do involving them and STUFF!!! I haven't even gotten around to talking about sky au!!!!! And that was something thats been like. IVE BEEN MEANING TO TALK ABT IT BUT like I've rambled before I feel like I'm not prepared enough to. talk about it I don't even know how to explain it's not even that im embarrassed bc that's bound to happen with whatever I do but AHH!!

maybe ikm getting that guilt™ or whatever but it's NOT EVEN HAPPENED UET!!! Like I am just .nervous of moving on from my current fixation even tho they still make my brain ill they make me sick (positive) like there's no doubt that theyre .gonna be living in my brain rent free forever but I DOKTKNKOWW

and before I start confusing anyone or whatever. no I'm not uninterested in ishimondos no I probably won't stop drawing them bc I'm still very ill about them so. there's that! okay ! Thank u for coming to my Ted talk

#like i still. think about them j just IDK IDK monkey brain scared of change #bwomp bwomp #uhhhh i for reals need to catch u guys up on my sketchbook doodles bc then u can see my thought process on. what the past few....uh weeks? #have sorta been like with my art #most of it is prompttober stuff (cringetober amd mobtober) . i did draw the ishimodnos uhhhh fairly recently (i think a day after #i made the post abt me missing them #BUT STILL #mahbe im missing yhrm again maybe thats whu i am nervosu of changing intrests (or gaining new interests) #EVEN THO I LITERALLY DID THAT. WITH MOB PSYCHO #and ishimond and mp100 are like my two fixations right nwo #they can coexist why am i like ooo ahh im so spooky nervous abt gaining new interests #GIRL LIVE UR LIFE!!!! #anywyas whay if i went back to my roots (lps #wgat if i drew my fav littlest pet shops and subject y ou to tjrm #what if i made th ishimondosbas lps ............. #Ohmgof i wanna do mob as one tok im gonna go crazyi #im talking out of my ass at this point ok if u took the time to read all this bs thej thamk uou #krambles #goonight

[weenhands]

im so curious as to why people ever have feelings for me

#like im nothing. i’m a ghost. my brain is not normal in so many ways #and i’m not saying it’s like. fucked up. i mean it is and idk why anyone sees that and is amazed by it. but like. im autistic #and it’s even obvious on here. i have ocd and i think and fixate on really dumb shit. im psychotic and i end up panicking and fearing that #normal fun things everyone else experiences will bring me to my next embarrassingly stupid demise #like. im fucked up.