#why on earth will you leash a frog-

[colourless-hydrangeas]

WHY- JUST WHY?

#minecraft #minecraft 1.18 #frog #why on earth will you leash a frog- #why is this a thing? #what did i just do-

[gamer-logic]

Since my state, Georgia, is having the annual Peaches to Beaches event which is two days of statewide yard sales, I thought it would be interesting to show how America, the states, and any other countries wanting to participate both 1p and 2p would be during this event. So here you go!

Georgia is happily selling fresh produce like boiled peanuts and Vidalia onions and peach-based deserts. Her homemade peach cobbler and ice cream are to die for!

Antonio (Spain) also sells many fresh tomatoes, olives, and other vegetables. He doesn't understand why no one wants his Olive Juice though.

Hawaii and Alaska make a killing selling lemonade at their stand with a free complimentary handmade flower crown with every purchase. While using their sheer cuteness to attract everyone including one of those sweet biker gangs. It's really surreal to see a huge gang of buff, tattooed, tough-looking guys in leather wearing flower crowns and drinking lemonade. Allen's also there to supervise and ward of creep. Also, to provide people more 'incentive' to buy their lemonade.

Texas breaks out the Texas BBQ and is in a Barbecuing turf war with Jett (Australia). They draw huge crowds for the five-alarm chili as well and hold a competition who can eat the most without burning out their tongues and/or passing out.

Florida sells some of the weirdest stuff you'll ever see. "Want a full-scale model of a gator made entirely out of bottle caps? Only ten bucks! Want a portrait of Florida Man painted with orange juice? 15 bucks!"

Nevada also tries to sell weird and sketchy stuff to scam everyone. "This piece is the genuine article folks! One napkin gently used by Elvis Presley himself! Just 500 bucks! Also, gets into a haggling war with Lars (Netherlands). Somewhere Alfred's dad instincts go off and he reminds himself to ground Nevada.

California, Oregon, and Washington collaborate and California sells anything vegan or made with avocadoes and the autographs of Hollywood stars, Oregon sells his old tye-dyed shirts and records, they also made him sell his old groovy hippy bus from the sixties he'd never got rid of no one knew they had. Oregon can be a bit of a hoarder, so they had to tie him to a chair and gag him because he wouldn't surrender the bus without a fight. Washington also tries to sell and drink cups of coffee, but in the hot Southern heat, this doesn't end well.

Louisiana sells anything Cajun-style from frog legs to fresh gumbo, to beignets. Also has a full collection of Mardi Gras masks and shrunken voodoo heads on sale for two bucks a pop.

Gilbert (Prussia) gets tricked by Nevada and gets a ton of stupid things he doesn't need. Ludwig (Germany) tries unsuccessfully to keep him on a metaphorical leash.

Ludwig always checks the quality of things he sees and buys dog toys and supplies for Blackie, Berlitz, and Astor. Later, he actually buys a kiddie leash for Gilbert.

All the while Lutz (2p! Germany) is asleep in a lawn chair with his hat on his face after drinking like six cold beers from this really good booth. All the while, Klaus (2p! Prussia) finds an antique Teutonic Knights flag from a vendor whose family was from Germany.

Vash (Switzerland) buys antique guns from Alabama and Roderich (Austria) also checks out some of Tennessee's guitars. He's horrified upon seeing Alabama's banjo and washboard.

Mathew (Canada) and Emma (Belgium) combine their powers and tag team to sell the best pancakes and waffles on earth with genuine Canadian maple syrup.

New York sells tons of baseball memorabilia and collectibles. Allen, trying to save his bad-boy image, tries to be discreet when buying some while taking Hawaii and Alaska around to get something with their lemonade money. James also gets some hockey memorabilia with Michigan and Minnesota who also got snow cones.

Alaska and Hawaii see a giant deluxe dollhouse but are almost in tears when they don't have enough money. But they end up getting it for free because no one can resist their weaponized puppy dog eyes. Also, no one can resist a growling Allen. Using the leftover money, they buy cute little rainbow umbrella hats for everyone and have Allen wear one who begrudgingly accepts it.

James, walking by with an armful hockey gear and flannel shirts, bursts out laughing when he sees this. In revenge, Allen forces him to wear one too and help him carry the dollhouse, much to Hawaii and Alaska's delight! "I said go my way puck head!" "No, it's my way, you vegan loving hoser!" A passing Francis (France)' is in stylish horror when they also make him and a nonchalant Luis (2p! France), holding a case of vintage wines, wear them too. Hawaii and Alaska go around giving umbrella hats to everyone including a sleeping Lutz they pass by.

Loving (Romano) practically has to supervise Feliciano (Italy) and keep him from buying anything too stupid on impulse or get scammed. They still end up with stacks upon stacks of cookbooks, kitchen wear, and a Mona Lisa made entirely out of Macaroni. They also get umbrella hats.

Flavio (2p! Romano) browses through clothing racks to get ideas for his vintage line. Also checks out the handmade fabrics like quilts. "Such craftsmanship! This pattern is so unique and chic! I simply must have it! What's your price Bella?" The nice old woman selling the quilt just smiles, "Oh just about five dollars young man." "Perfect!" Flavio hands the quilts off to Andreas (2p! Spain) who's practically buried underneath the fabric. Luciano (2p! Italy) facepalms while holding a new knife set in its case. "Oooh! Look at those adorable hats I just have to have one." Cue three more umbrella hats and a humiliated Luciano. "Just kill me now..."

Katyusha (Ukraine), Elizaveta (Hungary), Lillie (Liechtenstein), Natalya, (Belarus), Katya( 2p! Ukraine) and Anastasia (2p! Belarus), and Michelle (Seychelles) explore with armfuls of clothes, new ribbons, and a gun case for Switzerland (Lillie), cast iron frying pans (Elizaveta, watch out Prussia!), farm tools (Katyusha), Jewelry and unmentionables (Katya), dresses (Anastasia), an assortment of switchblades (Natalya), and one of those singing fish on a plague (Michelle). It's definitely an interesting group.

Kiku (Japan) and Kuro (2p! Japan) find a nerd booth selling comics, manga, and Japanese weapons like katanas. Kuro test swings a blade and tries to slice the table so hard it breaks the blade, "Hmmm, not sharp enough for me, got anything else?" He throws it on the pile of broken blades he's already tested. Kiku stockpiles on limited-edition manga and he and the vendor end up getting into a huge, heated by Kiku standards, debate on who's waifu is best. Further down, Alfred reads every Marvel/DC comic while keeping an ear out on every state's location. He checks on Texas via his glasses and notices he's beating Australia in the chili contest. "That's my boy!"

Wisconsin wearing a cheese head sells anything cheese-based. He's got cheddar, goat cheese, string cheese, cheese spray, gorgonzola, grilled cheese, cheese curds, Mac n' Cheese, cheese sculptures of all world monuments, you name it he's got it! He also starts a war with Iowa's corn dishes and Idaho's potato dishes. They eventually end up flinging cheese, potatoes, and corn after they start dissing each other's foods. "Take this cheese brain!" "Nice aim, I-da-ho!" "I told you not to call me that!" "I'm gonna go children of the corn on y'all's behinds!" Poor Nebraska is stuck in the middle.

Alfred (America) hears the commotion and using his parent radar, immediately knows who it is and reminds himself to ground Iowa, Wisconsin, and Idaho later along with Nevada who, though still grounded for sure, makes him feel a little proud of since he managed to out haggle Netherlands.

New Mexico and Arizona also sell Native American handicrafts along with things like dreamcatchers and giant inflatable aliens. While Delaware, being the boring stick in the mud that he is, walks by with a framed and complete U.S. quarter collection from a vendor.

Kansas sells out of every sunflower she had courtesy of Ivan (Russia). Ivan and her the team up to buy out every sunflower seed from here to kingdom come. Viktor (2p! Russia) buys all the vodka he can find and a new shovel while Xiao (2p! China) tries giving people tattoos for 10 bucks a pop.

He tries to convince Yao (China) to get a hello kitty one to match the giant plushie he's holding, with the encouragement of Leon (Hong Kong) and Yong Soo (South Korea) who all collectively agree he needs to quit being such a grandpa. They also like calling him an antique-like the items on sale. " Aiyah! I'm not that old, aru!" "Yeah, you are Sensei." "Don't deny it! Da Ze!" Respect your elders!" "Tattoos originated in Korea da ze!" He totally is that old.

Oliver (2p! England) holds a bake sale and has people lined up for blocks to get some. Arthur (England), after having his scones shut down after it poisoned some unlucky squirrels, fries selling authentic magical items like unicorn hair or pixie dust. Everyone thinks he's a little crazy but he did sell a good bit of old magic books he needed to get out of his house, after making sure no one could actually use them of course.

The Nordics also went perusing for antique and handmade furniture when Mathias (Denmark) spots two full sets of Viking costumes and tries to get Lukas (Norway) to try them on with him. Lukas wasn't amused.

Berwald (Sweden) and Tino (Finland) also find a great handmade table to get after inspecting the workmanship and a full Lego set for Peter (Sealand), now if only Mathias would stop squealing like a little kid at the full piece lego death star. Emil (Iceland) keeps thinking he's the mature one until he spots a mini top hat and cane for Mr. Puffin.

In the end, everyone ends up wearing umbrella hats courtesy of Hawaii and Alaska, loving all the strange things they bought or counting the profits they made. Alfred (America) is proud of his kids and visits everyone one of their stands. He ends up looking pretty funny with an umbrella hat (HW, AK), a washboard, (AL),a picture of Florida Man, (FL), a balloon alien (NM, AZ), a tye dye shirt (CA, WA, OR), hockey stick shaped glasses (MN, MI), a giant stack of comics with a replica Thor hammer and Captain America shield on his back, all in a shopping cart (NV), and a giant turkey leg in his hand (Tx). Unsurprisingly, it was a tie between Oliver, Texas, and Australia for who earned the most with their food. Georgia just smiled as this was another great year for her state and people!

#Hetalia #2p hetalia #hetalia headcannons #hetalia states #hws states #aph america #aph england #aph france #aph italy #aph russia #aph nordics #aph prussia #aph switzerland #aph romano #aph germany #aph liechtenstein #aph austria #aph nethlands #aph canada #aph china #aph japan #aph south korea #aph ukraine #aph belarus #aph hungary #aph australia #aph belgium #aph hong kong #aph spain #aph georgia

[thegoddessyuri]

Hiii everyoneee!!!

For four years, this comic has been on hiatus due to sanctions with the author and the platform where it was published. But now is ongoing😁. Personally, is one of my favorites Yuri's, I'm so exited for his return. Of course the main couple it's too MUCH.

Name: On a leash

Author: Agi

Synopsis: It is a story told by the protagonist about his life and how it changed due to the war. The reasons why he became a soldier were shown and who changed his life, or to be more specific, who turned his life upside down. The war is about the battle between the creatures of the earth and the sky, the soldiers are humans who can transform into a type of animal, as for the main prototaginist, she is able to transform into a dog. So far 3 types of soldiers have been introduced in the story;

Mammals: Humans that can transform into mammals (e.g. wolves, dogs, tigers, bulls, etc.)

Replicans: Humans that can transform into reptiles (e.g. frogs, snakes, etc.)

Federvolk (): Humans who can transform into birds (e.g. eagles, pidgeons, etc.)

The mammals and the Reptalians have joined forces to fight the Federvolks, so the progress of the war is taking place.

If you want to read it, you can ask me for the link by private. I hope u enjoy it!😚😝

#yuri edit #yurigirls #yuri manga #illustration #character design #manga #fanart #girls love #girls who like girls #military

[sylenspotionsandspells]

Sure! A huge cocky Thor demanding worship, enslaving there avengers and the world.

You know I’ve travelled a lot of different universes, timelines and realms but one of my favorite ones was the one where Thor went lust with power. Oh you want to hear more about that one? Well I suppose I can tell you more about that universe...who knows maybe you’ll end up there somehow.

It all started after the whole ordeal in New York. Thor had taken Loki back to Asgard to face his punishment. Most universes Loki got off pretty easy being put in a cell, this universe he wasn’t. Loki always said he felt like he was beneath his brother...now he was as his new boots. Maybe it was that that started Thor’s lust for power and torment, but it was Odin that caused it on Midgard. As an award for stopping his brother, Odin gave Midgard to Thor declaring him king. Thor was allowed to do whatever he wished to Earth with no consequences from Asgard.

When Thor returned from his journey the avengers had been ecstatic to welcome back their friend. They quickly changed their attitude when he told them the news. “My dear avengers I bring glorious news! I am now your new ruler, bow before me!” That went about as good as you thought it would. All of them spoke against it, so each of them was punished. “I do not think you understand, YOU WILL BOW.”

One by one each of the avengers fell. First Natasha just disappeared from existence, like she never was there. When that happened Bruce quickly transformed into the hulk and launched himself at Thor. “Ah banner I’m glad you volunteered.” Hulk didn’t know what was happening when he felt himself begin to harden, bend and contort. He couldn’t move, but was still aware of things going on around him. He felt a hard pressure on him before hearing Thor speak. “Ah yes, I think this throne shall do quite nicely.”

Clint was the next one to fall. He really should have known those arrows of his were no use. Never bring a bow to a magical god fight. He loved his archery so much Thor didn’t want to waste him, instead he used his magic to turn the man into a target dummy. He would be used to teach archery to future guards and warriors.

Tony, oh Tony. The Ironman himself. Tony got the worst of all of the punishments from Thor. You would probably think that his suit would have immediately made him the throne, and in a way it did. He was just turned into a different kind of throne. Thor had enough of Tony’s shit talking and decided to make him eat his words. You want to know where our favorite billionaire superhero is now? He’s currently in Thor’s personal bathroom as his favorite toilet. Only Thor or his favorite one night stands get to use him. You can’t help but feel a little sorry for the guy.

Steve? Steve spoke out against Thor the most. He pulled the whole “we bow to no kings thing” and honestly it still had no effect on anything what’s so ever. The king really did admire his spirit though. Wanting to teach the old soldier a lesson, Thor smiled as he changed Steve. He watched as the man's muscles shrank away until the supersoldier looked like he had before the serum. Thor let out a hardy laugh as he looked on the small man who’s uniform now draped over him like an oversized coat. If that wasn’t enough Thor made sure he lost his clothes and he redressed him. He made Sure Steve had a cock cage on as well as a collar and leash. “For trying so hard to resist me, it shall be more difficult as you are now my own throne slut.” No matter who or what was happening, every time Thor sat on his throne, Steve would be on his leash right next to it.

So that’s what happened to the avengers. Some had better punishments than others that was for sure. However I do love seeing Steve every time I visit Thor, so it’s more of a reward for me. I have heard Steve’s been changed into a couple other things at times for Thor, so there’s that. Also shooting arrows into target clint is oddly satisfying as well. Anyways I’m getting off topic. I’m pretty sure it was then, after he reduced the worlds mightiest heroes to his playthings that he truly began to let his power loose on the world.

After the avengers fell the world wasn't soon after. Of course the nations of the world tried to retaliate but it didn’t work as they couldn’t stand against the god of thunder. I think my favorite thing he did though was with General Ross. No matter what universe or timeline I go to he is always a dick in it. So what Thor did to him was the best. When the man came to Thor he had the audacity to demand him to step down, like that would work. Thor didn’t even move when the man crumbled into his clothes and came out a pig. I heard the pork chops were really good that day.

The world quickly bowed down to their new ruler. Of course some people would still try to rebel against their king, but that never lasted long. The rebels were never killed...at least not directly they were just changed to help serve their community or their king. Maybe that is why that universe is one of my favorites to visit, I love it when transformation is used for a punishment. I’ve seen so many mortals get changed, from frogs to grains of sand. Thor really does get creative with his punishments. 

Oh but my words don’t do it justice. I think maybe you should go for a visit yourself! Tell King Thor that I say hi and will visit him soon. There are many adventures to be held in that world.

#transformation #inanimate transformation #muscle regression #muscle loss #magic #wish #genie #celebrity tf #fanfic tf

[embeanwrites]

Finding Home Gavin Reed x Reader

Chapter 8

Masterlist

We pulled back into dad’s house. Walking back inside I immediately noticed Sumo was laying down with the old blanket dad was talking about earlier. He perked up the moment we walked in and started wagging his tail.

“He kept crying after you left, he’s a big softie.” My dad said through a mouthful of noodles. I smiled and walked over to pet Sumo and gave him a kiss on the top of his head.

“I’m not going anywhere, Sumo.” I said softly into his fur. I looked at the blanket. It was a faded blue and a lot smaller than I remembered it. Or maybe I was just a lot smaller in my memories with it. Sumo had chewed a few holes in it from carrying it around. After all these years, he hadn’t forgotten about me. I wondered if my dad ever took the blanket and thought about me. I sat next to my dad on the couch, grabbing a pair of chopsticks and stealing the container of noodles from him.

“Hey!” He yelled through a mouthful of food. I smiled.

“So, what are we watching?”

“You’re the guest, you pick.”

“Hmmm…Connor have you seen the original Muppet movie?” My dad laughed.

“That movie is older than me, (Y/n)!”

“I have not seen anything about ‘Muppets’.” Connor responded sitting down on the floor with Sumo. It was interesting, even though there was plenty of room on the couch he still chose to sit on the floor with Sumo.

“Then that’s what we’re watching. Everyone needs to watch the Muppets. If I could find a way to show it in my class, I totally would. Hey! Connor you could analyze it and see if there’s any way I could connect it to humans and androids or sociology!”

“Oh, your students must love having to watch old movies.” My dad snorted.

“Hey! I showed my class at (dream/school) ‘The Iron Giant’ and they loved it!”

“How on earth did you connect that?”

“Dad, it’s about a giant robot and people immediately assuming he was going to kill everyone, and, in the end, he was the hero. It’s literally perfect.” I laughed, grabbing the remote from the table and found the movie. I took my phone out of my pocket and placed it face down, so I wouldn’t get distracted. Clicking play I snuggled into the couch and continued eating.

“I'm Statler.

I'm Waldorf.

We're here to heckle

The Muppet Movie.”

“Why are some puppets and others human?” Connor asked, I looked over at him. He once again had tilted his head.

“They’re Muppets, Connor. And I wouldn’t question it too much, in the next movie they say a bear and a frog are twin brothers.” He furrowed his brow and kept his eyes intently on the movie.

As the movie went on, I couldn’t help but hum along to the songs. Muppets always felt like home. When I was younger, me, dad, and mom had a Muppet movie marathon on my birthday. I don’t remember much about what else we did, but I remember watching the movie and laughing with them. It was right before they got divorced. It was the last happy memory of all three of us I had.

Through the corner of my eye, I watched my dad move his foot to the music and laugh at the funny parts. I wondered if he remembered the last time we watched this together. I wondered if he ever watched them with Cole.

When the movie ended, I got up and stretched. Looking at the clock, I noticed it was only 7 pm.

“I’m going to change into my pajamas.” I said while picking up my backpack. “What room should I use?”

“You can use mine, it’s the one at the end of the hallway.” Connor said. I nodded and walked in.

The room had sparse decorations, which wasn’t too surprising. I could tell by what was on the walls that this must have been Cole’s room. I changed into sweatpants and a giant t-shirt, putting my dirty clothes in the bottom of my bag. I walked back out to find Connor putting a leash on Sumo and my dad cleaning up from dinner.

“Dang, Connor. If you had told me you were going to go walk Sumo I would’ve waited to change, so I could go with you!”

“I’m just taking him out for a couple of minutes. I will let you know the next time I plan on walking him. Come on, Sumo.” I smiled and walked over to my dad.

“Gun to my head, if you were to ask me if Hank Anderson would ever let an android live with him, I would say no way in a heartbeat.” My dad chuckled.

“Before Connor, I would’ve agreed.”

“What changed?”

“When we were hunting deviants, it was clear that they all just…wanted to be free. There were two girls that seemed to be truly in love. Connor’s mission was to bring in the deviants, but he had a gun trained on them and he let them go. I guess I just realized that humans and androids aren’t that much different.” I nodded as I kept my eyes on the front door.

“If you had read my articles you would’ve learned that sooner.” I said with a laugh.

“How did you know so early on?” I shuffled uncomfortably.

“I’m not really sure. It wasn’t one moment that made me realize. In undergrad I took a lot of sociology and history classes and I just kept seeing the same issues repeating over and over again. Humans have always had an “us vs them” mentality, so it was just the same thing we’ve seen since the earliest civilization.” My dad hummed.

“I don’t know how you got so smart. You certainly didn’t get that from me.” I laughed.

“I studied really hard and never stopped. Going into college I didn’t even know I was going to go to grad school and get my PhD. I just started learning and I never wanted to stop. Especially after I read about how some androids were being treated. I wanted to make a difference.” I sighed. “I’d like to think I’ve gotten most of my students outside their comfort zones and got them to accept androids as free beings, but I have a feeling that may be harder in Detroit.”

“Well, I’ve never seen you teach, but just by that statement I can tell you really care. Your students will see that too and that’ll get them to listen. There’s a reason everyone hates math, no one could be passionate about that.” I laughed. Connor walked back in with Sumo. The moment he unhooked his leash he came bounding over to me. “Man, he’s going to attack you every time he sees you.” I got on my knees and started petting him.

“Good, because I’ve missed him.” I scratched behind his ear and he thumbed his back leg. I got up and walked back over to the couch and stretched my legs out. Sumo followed me and laid down on the floor next to me, I reached over and grabbed my phone off the table. I checked my messages. A couple from friends back home. I bit my lip, debating if I should text Gavin. In the end I decided I had bothered him enough for one day.

“(Y/n), when did you want to go walk the rescue dogs?” Connor asked sitting next to my feet on the couch.

“Do you work tomorrow?”

“He doesn’t, but I have too.” My dad grunted coming back to the living room.

“Why?” My dad shook his head.

“Captain Fowler is having the Lieutenant take some refresher classes and some of the detectives are getting together to discuss how android crime cases should be handled from now on.”  I sat up.

“Is it an open meeting?” I asked my dad quickly.

“Not that I know of.” He answered.

“Hm…ask the Captain if I could possibly assist you guys with that. I know I’m not a police officer, but I understand a lot about androids and humans. I even minored in forensics in undergrad, but that was a while ago.”

“I’ll ask him, I think it’s a good idea. It wouldn’t hurt to get more opinions on how to handle it. The government is sure taking their sweet time coming up with laws covering everything.” I nodded in agreement. “Well, I’m gonna head to bed, read your book a little before sleeping. See you guys tomorrow.”

“Good night!” Me and Connor said at the same time. My dad kept walking and waved a little before going to his room and shutting the door. Still sitting up I looked at Connor. His LED was blue and looking at my backpack.

“I brought a scrapbook if you’d like me to show it to you.” I said gently, grabbing my bag.

“Will it cause you more emotional distress to look at it tonight?” He asked softly, causing me to laugh.

“No, Connor. This is filled with good memories.” I got the book out and moved closer to him, so the book sat on both of our legs. “This is me with my freshman orientation group. I was so scared that day. The campus felt so much bigger when I started living on it, but over time it felt smaller.” I kept flipping the pages stopping to explain some pictures.

“That is Officer Chen.” Connor said pointing to an old picture of me and Tina painting each other’s toenails. I smiled.

“Me and Tina have been friends for a long time, before she went to the police academy, she would come to my dorm room to crash.” I grabbed my phone and snapped a picture and sent it to Tina.

 Look at these babies!

 “Officer Chen is on duty right now. She may not respond right away.” I sat my phone down.

“I know, but she’ll see it eventually.” I flipped a couple more pages. There were pictures of graduation and friends.

“Who’s that?” Connor asked pointing to a picture of me with a KL900.

“Oh, during my research I interviewed some androids. She was designed for social work. It’s been so long, but I think her name is Lucy.” Connor’s LED flashed yellow.

“She died during the revolution.” I looked intently at the picture, remembering how kind she was.

“She was a really good person.” I clenched the book a little tighter. “I wish I could have done more during the revolution. I helped a couple of androids, but if I had been in Detroit maybe I could’ve done more.” Connor awkwardly patted my shoulder.

“You were safer outside of the city. Hank would be upset if you had gotten hurt.” I nodded, closing the book.

“Could we look at the rest some other time? There’s a few more androids and I’m not sure if I’m ready to hear about their fate.”

“Of course. Are you going to bed?” I looked at my phone.

“Nah, it’s only 8. If I sleep now, I’ll mess up my sleep schedule even more and wake up at like 4 am. What do you want to do?”

“Would you like to watch the second Muppets movie?” I smiled.

“So, you liked the movie?” Connor smiled back.

“It was interesting. I enjoyed the fact that they knew it was a movie.”

“Well, the next one is ‘The Great Caper’, but that one’s probably my least favorite.”

“Is it essential to watch them in order?” Connor asked, tilting his head.

“God no, they’re a mess. Some of the ones that were made later have an order, but for the most part you can watch them in any order.”

“You can pick which one next.” I smiled widely.

“’The Muppets take Manhattan’, it is then!” I found the movie on the tv but waited to press play. “Hey, Connor. Sometimes you tilt your head a little. Is that in your programming or did you pick that up somewhere?”

“I was programmed to blend in with humans, it’s one of the few ‘quirks’ Cyberlife gave me, why?” I watched him, he looked as if he was about to tilt his head again but stopped himself causing me to chuckle.

“I’ve noticed you do it a lot and when Nines was in my office, he did it a couple times. I was wondering if you both were programmed to do that or if he picked it up from you.”

“I believe it is in both of our programming.” I nodded and clicked play on the movie. I patted the couch and Sumo jumped up next to me. “Sumo is not allowed on the couch.”

“It’s a special occasion, one night won’t hurt, Connor.” He frowned as his LED flashed yellow.

“It’s Friday night, there is no holiday today.”

“Exactly.” I said, turning my eyes to the movie. His LED changed back to blue as he sighed. He glanced at Sumo one more time, before finally starting to watch the movie.

 “Together again

Gee, it's good

to be together again

I just can't imagine that

you've ever been gone

It's not starting over 

It's just going on

Together again…”

#gavin reed x reader #gavin reed #hank anderson #connor is like a son to hank #connor has major little brother energy #rk800 #rk800connor #dbh #detroit become human #x reader #fan fiction #listen i just really love muppets

[anangelicday-mrwolf]

Wolfsbane : Noblesse Fanfic (post-ending)

(previous chapter)

Chapter 36 – Disorder in Order

‘I don’t get it.’

The man’s fingers clasped his biceps tighter as his arms were crossed.

The 3rd Elder was seated on his bed, his brain whirring madly in reflection.

The day that QuadraNet’s switch was supposed to be turned on – or rather, the day that according to Helga they would get to find the opportunity they have been waiting for, he fulfilled his mission.

That was the day for him to make good use of the mayhem everyone will go through and pick up any vulnerability or noteworthy factor they could use against the blonde scientist, who will surely prove himself as the tallest, hardest, and mightiest wall for the surviving Union to break through.

And on the D-day, Helga’s words came true.

Apparently all networks connected for the QuadraNet had gone haywire; not even Frankenstein could stay free from alarm.

No, he was more than alarmed; he was in panic.

‘As far as I know, he didn’t take part in the project. That day he was there simply to watch QuadraNet come alive. Which must be why he was so flustered, since he was in no position to do something about it, with no one to answer him, let alone help him.’

During the event, Frankenstein was basically stuck in the middle of his cave expedition, with all the lighting equipment mysteriously sabotaged, trapped in a pitch-dark space with the rest of his team too far away to reach, with no option other than emitting echoes of cries unanswered.

But Frankenstein was no idiot. In fact, when it comes to technology he is a virtuoso, competent enough to make Union covet and compete against him.

So to nobody’s wonder, Frankenstein eventually recovered the transmission and reconnected to the rest, incredibly fast for someone who was invited as a spectator.

Naturally, he could not spare his attention to anything else other than his computers.

Thus he gave 3rd Elder enough time to flaunt his skills in profiling and snooping.

‘Though I had to be extra-careful, in consideration of the person I was snooping about.’

As Frankenstein’s eyes were successfully diverted, 3rd Elder headed to the lab, to make use of the gear he was so thankful he had packed: a spray that reveals fingerprints, a development from a life technology company under Union’s possession, once used by civilians as well.

It evaporates over time, leaving no traces whatsoever once it is gone. And it conveys different hues depending on the time the fingerprint was first left, allowing its user to deduce the order and marking time of each fingerprint.

However, it can no longer be seen among civilians, as it was permanently discontinued following the public concern that it must not be led into the wrong hands.

And 3rd Elder could finally make it useful in order to track down Frankenstein’s most recent cognitive journey.

By taking a look at the files he submitted for the human scientist and files the latter had collected by himself, he would be able to pinpoint the main topic of the files or the topic Frankenstein is most interested in.

And ultimately infer what he is most deeply involved with and what he is planning, for the Union to prepare against in advance.

The 3rd Elder gave a little tip regarding this, by telling Helga that Frankenstein specified he intends to find out the reason behind the Noblesse’s mysterious return to life.

Which Helga did not buy.

Listening to you, now there is no doubt it is our gravest woe and fear that the Union had failed in making an ally out of him. Now that he is undeniably our enemy, we should be wary of his every word and action. And do you honestly think he was being honest with you?

He wanted to retort by correcting her assumption – Yes, you can trust him. He’ll never lie when it comes to his master – but he did not; after all, she did have a point.

‘By the way, how come I momentarily got so close to taking his side back then?’

The white-haired man shook his head to tune out a tiny voice within, to instead clutch his arms even tighter and reassess what his scavenging revealed for him.

He decided to add weight to Helga’s claim and delved into as thoroughly as possibly the files Frankenstein had been dissecting, to gain nothing in particular.

The volume and contents were beyond his imaginations, but all in all Frankenstein’s files were centered on similar topics.

Revival. Extension of life. Inducing coma or pseudo-coma state. Definition of biological death. And all that jazz.

QED, they were mostly related to life and death.

‘Which means he was staying true to the goal of his research he shared with me.’

Despite his disappointment, 3rd Elder did not deem his exploration a waste of time.

Which is why he was so puzzled.

‘For some strange reason, I found most of his fingerprints not on his files but on the cup he’d always place on his table. And on the equipment used to generate chemical drink. And he’s touched it very recently.’

To say “most of his fingerprints” was an understatement; for a moment 3rd Elder had thought he became a detective excavating a drug addict’s lair.

So he did not hesitate in pulling out a specially designed slip of paper to dip into Frankenstein’s cup for a sample.

All he has to do is to take the paper to Helga for analysis; this is where a problem arises.

‘The camera and recording device Frankenstein implanted in me may be dormant, but as of now I can’t send this to Helga. Not with Lady Lunark paying visits to this island. Not to mention no chance in hell will she ever trust me. Which means I must be the one to analyze the contents of Frankenstein’s drink.’

The job is neither impossible nor difficult, given that he is provided with appropriate apparatus.

He had trained himself in theories and practices in experiments, having orchestrated and participated in several experiments and projects at the Union.

‘But the only equipment I can use in this place all belong to Frankenstein. I’ll need distraction to use them.’

A single chance – that was all he needed.

A single chance of disturbance equal to the recent uproar affiliated with the QuadraNet. Or Frankenstein’s urgent trip to the werewolf realm.

‘Then it’d be less than a gulp to run the analysis,’ sighed 3rd Elder, his mind tracing back to the transparent plastic bag he had hidden, containing the paper slip safe from oxidation.

‘Should I place an order for disorder to Helga? She’s the one who commanded both occasions.’

Marveling once again at her leadership, 3rd Elder had yet to realize that his chance would come much faster than expected.

*****

It has been days since the night at a café by the beach of Incheon, Korea.

Because of which Yuigi has grown more comfortable around Takio.

The awkwardness and discomfiture she had been haunted with ever since she was parted from Union without consent were pretty much no more.

Nonetheless, Yuigi did not define her standing as better.

‘So let’s say I continue to help him locate Union’s facilities and gain his gang’s trust. And free myself from this choker. But then what? Once the last of the Union is gone, what should I do? What am I supposed to do with my life from then on?’

Driven by the searing guilt that she could not protect her brother and sister, Yuigi had lived a life of obsession with power.

Notwithstanding, she lost the powers she has so very feverishly nurtured. She lost the association and purpose that were entailed.

The life of Raciela, the sister of Arthur and Hailey, had long been disconnected from her.

The life thrusted upon her was the life of Yuigi, a member of the Cerberus, one of the top personal guards of the Union.

And Yuigi’s life was robbed from her over a mere day.

And she had no way to return to Raciela’s life.

She has come too far to indulge in ordinary life now. After all, she was now used to dubbing herself as Yuigi, surrounded by people who treat her as Yuigi, not Raciela.

She was reminded of a fairy tale she once read for her siblings: a story of a frog rejected by all animals.

The frog was born from water, to dwell in and dance across both earth and water once fully matured.

Alas, the frog’s gift of mobility in two completely unidentical domains won itself hatred from creatures of both domains. The creatures of water resented the frog’s ability to walk upon solid ground they could not even dream of; creatures of land were more than unhappy to see a native of aquatic dominion, reckoned inferior by the terrestrial-born, was treading along their footprints.

So in unison, they rejected the frog, to make sure it could find respite in neither the earth nor the water.

‘And looks like I’m the frog right now.’

Also, she had been plagued with void within, now that her life as Yuigi was lost as well. And she knew not how to get rid of the void.

She knew that she could not join what remained of the Union.

‘That’s just unimaginable, as long as this leash stays on me. Besides, even without this choker, I can’t possibly do that. Because...’

At then Yuigi fell heavily in silence, which was already hung upon her entire being.

Because?

Because what?

‘Why would you bring up the term at the moment? Don’t tell me you’ve grown a liking to that guy just because he’s been taking care of you.’

Yuigi violently shook her head, as if a bug had dived into her hair.

She shook her head so hard she thought she could hear her skull vibrating.

No, she actually felt like the entire safehouse was vibrating.

‘...Wait a minute.’

She reconsidered her thought, upon checking the water left in the cup on the table.

She could swear upon her life that nothing in the safehouse was moving, herself included, but the water was trembling, as if there were a quake.

As Yuigi fixed her eyes upon the cup, similar effect started to inflict the possessions within the safehouse, including the chair she was sitting in, the table she set her elbow upon, and the dishes inside the sink that were clattering in a nervous beat.

Just when Yuigi was trying to conjecture what could these be signaling, with a BAM the walls constructed to stand sturdy against majority of firearm and missiles spit out thousands of splinters, like a glass window hit by a brick.

Yuigi was swept in the aftermath and flung through the air, to be caught in the constructions and objects that had been composing the safehouse just a second ago.

Had she not been a modified human, and had Frankenstein employed materials less substantial, she would have never stood on her feet again.

Holding her head in her hand in a desperate attempt to do something about her eardrums, being bombarded with screeches due to the explosion, Yuigi could soon make out the highly likely suspect of the unappreciated delivery of disorder.

Fortunately her eyes were still functional, and she caught the sight of a huge man with hair the color of hay and face similar to that of a gigantic toad.

“...Could sme... I kn... Ver wrong.”

Yuigi had to squint to process what he was talking about, due to the noises that were still whipping up in her ears.

“...Was told... Ract tho... Not thi... Et you here.”

The man smirked, making himself look even more like a toad, with his eyes on Yuigi.

“No offe... Old to do... Be happie... Once I... Ally be... Anding at the spotlight!”

Before Yuigi could catch her breath after she was sure her ears have somewhat returned to normal, the man lunged towards her.

(next chapter)

I introduce you a new character - yes, he is an OC, and he is a supporting character. However, I added him for a reason, and you’d soon get to see why. Stay tuned for more!

#korean webcomic #korean webtoon #fanfic #noblesse #frankenstein #lunark #frankensteinxlunark #wolfsbane

[dogtrainingspot-blog]

Coaching Your Dog Humanely: Part One

Welcome the Dog into the Human World

Have You watched The Dog Whisperer and thought,'Wow, that guy is amazing! What a great way to train a dog!" I know I have many occasions. Cesar Milan instructs one fundamental principle about puppies - that a dog is a pack animal by instinct. In accordance with Cesar, your work is to become the pack leader, a dominant Alpha male/female with'balance'. I figure by'balance' he means you ought to deal with the animal fairly, since they'd expect to get treated at a wild bunch. He has really nice and quick results with this technique. I will not say it is a poor method, but it is not how I decide to train my dogs and that is why.

There is 1 thing quite Incorrect with the'you're the pack leader' notion - it presumes that the dog occupies a puppy's world, and also for one to restrain it, you need to behave as a puppy could, the Alpha male or female of the bunch. For nearly all dogs that are household pets that this usually means the operator will deal with the creature as though it'd just instinctual processes happening in its mind, no logical thought processes. To refute that believing go and watch both of these brief videos of Lucy's behaviour: Lucy Remembers Her Ball along with Lucy and The Vacuum Cleaner (links look in bottom). A puppy doesn't occupy a puppy's world unless it is in a bunch of dogs, roaming the wilderness like a wolf, bringing prey down and sharing its own kill. This isn't your dog. Your puppy would not pursue its dinner when it went starving for a week! It would no longer kill a raccoon and tear its own flesh apart than will your six year-old kid! Should you have this kind of animal it is a sure bet that it is a dangerous dog, one which causes individuals in your area to cross the road to avoid.

Should you become the pack leader, you have Descended to the puppy's world. Having done thus, the puppy will integrate nicely with other dogs, reside in a bunch thankfully, understand its location in the human package, and usually behave nicely, but it will not achieve its entire potential. When you embraced the dog in your loved ones, you did not make a decision to turn into a primeval growler, (that can work when you've got the cahones to back up the dangers ), you made a decision to present a creature to the human world. Since the 2 movies reveal, Lucy is a creature with human-like trends developed to the complete potential of her younger dog mind. She, like 99% of puppies now, belongs to a household, was introduced into human theories, and resides in a human universe. It is better for you to train your puppy to live well on earth, as opposed to you in its own, for the interest of your dog as well as yourself. You'll have a far better companion, so will the puppy. The puppy will learn how to love people above dogs.

Lucy is a dog. Lucy will place herself The prepared based on where a individual puts their foot supporting a chunk. She properly expects how the ball is going to be propelled from the positioning of the foot. She cheats quite badly, coming at the destination of a pitched toy until it gets there. Her mind has calculated where you are most likely to throw or kick an item. Lucy knows how you'll kick a ball by simply shifting your weight from 1 hip to another, without so much as moving your toes! Greater than a goalie in soccer (soccer).

Lucy understands several hundred theories and controls, from Jump In The Boat, to Don't Go In The Street. She plays today but when she had been younger I would toss her ball to the road (a rural highway) and if she recognized that the ball had gone out of reach, rolling into forbidden territory, she'd wear the brakes and stop before crossing an imaginary line. That line was a bit of yellow rope lying round the driveway about 20 ft in the road. After she discovered the concept that the rope was removed, she had been permitted to venture out to pee on her I could expect her to not move beyond the imaginary line. This notion, Don't Go In The Street, is fundamental to a puppy being able to live happily in the world. It is the distinction between a deer or even a raccoon crossing the street along with your furry friend's thinking. It's heard that highways (an individual build not appearing from the puppy pack language ) are extremely bad.

Dogs Have logical thought processes. Dogs possess feelings. Dogs have a conscience. Dogs learn how to love. Dogs possess language abilities and may comprehend about five hundred individual theories with words. Not one of those things have a pup when you buy them, they're learned behaviours.

A Puppy can't do differential calculus, that is clear, but it can reason out how to control a person into giving food. Lucy has been given a treat each time she requested me to go pee out. If she gets somewhat thirsty, she's learned to ask to go out, and wait for thirty minutes and then return at the house to receive her reward. She will do so every hour or so until I've clued in and observe her. If she does not urine, the rewards quit, and thus does the manipulative behaviour as it is currently a waste of time. But this shows you a puppy can control people. It is not surprising actually; a puppy manipulates its owner several times over the course of the day. Should you wrap its leash, it is going to waken from a dead sleep and ring, pant and bark in the idea of going for a stroll. This is doggy manipulation. The dog is stating how happy they'd be if they went for a stroll, and you are feeling guilty if this was not your strategy.

So Higher justification aside, what could a dog do? It may learn. A puppy could learn so many things which you'd be amazed. If you merely instruct it what it must learn to operate well in a human universe, it might knock off your socks. Daily that Lucy and I wake upwe inform each other with hugs and kisses happy we are that we've got each other. Lucy loves people, so much so that she virtually ignores dogs. Can they create her meals for her? Can they throw her ball? Her stick? Her small teddy bears?

There is A Border Collie in Germany that may remember any of two hundred and fifty toys. Alan Alda of Mash fame visited this puppy for Nova on PBS. The puppy has all of her toys in a huge heap in 1 room. In a different room she's shown a tiny sample of the desirable toy (roughly one fifth scale). The puppy leaves, enters the area with the huge heap of various frogs, teddy bears, squirrels, puppets, dolls, devils, Muppets, rummaging round and returning immediately, and astonishingly, with the right toy. She does so perfectly, even if it is a brand new toy which she has never noticed before.

But once you've educated that puppy human theories, it is no Longer a puppy - it is a Canine Sapiens, a hybrid between puppy and Homo Sapiens (that is Latin for Thinking Man). It can't happily return to the package. Without needing to run this experiment, I moved to England for a couple of weeks and Lucy went into the kennel. The kennel is a member of a respectable breeder and Lucy had her very own'penalty box' (cage) placed in just a three by six foot . There were other dogs so that you'd think she would be OK, but those were'Pack Dogs'dogs the breeder retains solely for breeding. One traces, all of them bark. One runs round the yard, all of them run across the lawn. Lucy was having none of it, and their crude antics had her worried out. When I returned to pick up her she went crazy with joy! She ran across the truck around ten occasions barking, crying, tail wagging, face licking, and all manner of expressions of love. I started to talk with the breeder around England however Lucy jumped to the truck through an open doorway and barked off her head so loudly she couldn't be discounted. "I guess I'm being summoned," I told the breeder. Man, was happy to escape there!

This is Why many universities at the U.S. have ceased instructing gorillas and other primates American Sign Language in doctoral theses. After the research are over the creatures are returned into cages in the uterus. No longer riding around in automobiles for you! No more ice cream cones for you! The critters, capable of reasoning into a level, are back in cages languishing for the fantastic old times with their friends, not able to relate to another primates round them. The universities have determined that it is unethical behaviour to leave them when they have formed attachments for their coaches. You require a PHD in behavioural psychology to figure that out?

It may be frustrating to try teaching a puppy an Innovative idea. If you end up crying or becoming frustrated with all the dog back off. Stop. The issue is too complicated for her current state of comprehension and she does not understand exactly what you would like. The remedy is to split the issue into smaller measures. You did not learn algebra until you learned to count, add, subtract, multiply and divide. You did not learn to multiply till you learned to bring the exact same amount three times to itself. Dogs possess similar minds to individuals, except that they are somewhat limited in possible. But if you provide your dog credit for having the ability to think together with the capability of a 3 year-old kid, you are going to be amazed at what they could learn.

Your pet has a conscience. How do I know that? Your puppy dreams, and it is a certain sign of a bifurcated head using a conscious and a subconscious mind. The dog fantasies after a fantastic day, or even a bad moment. When they have had a fantastic daythey fall asleep and over five minutes go into the REM period of the sleep routine. REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement, and it occurs almost right off in puppies. In people it takes about one hour and half an hour. During REM sleep that the dog could be whining, barking, chasing, wagging its tail, chewing, eating gum, swimming. You will recognize a puppy who's dreaming when you see it, trust me, however, what that fantasy indicates is that it's a subconscious mind that is free to relive the adventures of this day. When it's a subconscious mind then it should have a conscious mind, since you can not have one without the other, unless it is in a coma.

The conscious mind Comprises the principles build - What I'm permitted to do, in addition to what I'm not permitted, but wish to perform. The subconscious mind includes the whole spectrum, memories, emotions, cognitive capabilities, but it is missing one important thing - that the principles build. It is ungoverned. Should you take that, then you take a dog's mind is built similarly to ours and is effective at a number of the very same things our mind can do. To love, to feel guilty, to believe, to want, to cause, to control, to anticipate, to comply, not to violate certain rules. A puppy learns over four weeks old to not pee in the home. Amazing once you consider it spent the first 10 months during its mother's breast. How then, in case it didn't have a conscious mind with a principles build? By instinct? By package mentality? No, from studying , which you'll be liable for.

So That is where it begins: simply by giving the dog some credit for having the ability to think. If you do not you will be treating her like The Keller parents handled her blind and deaf daughter Helen. Helen Keller became a successful writer and public speaker but only after a wonder worker, Anne Sullivan, made a decision to charge her with a mind that worked. Her parents had written off as peacefully. That is your job, to be the wonder worker for the four legged Helen. Do not charge your dog with thinking capability and it will not find anything helpful.

Your pet is Handicapped in lots of ways. The first is the fact that it devotes ten times more of its mind to scents than we do. It frees one tenth of its own mind to visual data than we do. A dog may have a cookie directly in the front of it, however if it is looking for it with odor, it can not see it. A puppy appears to close off its memory in favor of olfactory memory. When they're sniffing you can listen to the nose whoot, whoot, whoot, since they sample fast to get a hint. Additionally they move their minds when sampling in order that they know which path to proceed. You will learn how to divert the dog's mind to develop into a listener and a watcher whilst giving your own lessons. They will learn quicker when they understand they are being taught something. Having a verbal and visual hint, your puppy will listen,"Aha, the Master is trying to show me something important."

Your First Lesson: The Binary Method

I Have always had it simple training my puppy - I live alone. When you've got a household, all of whom are doggy pros from visiting the Whisperer, tell them to take a hike. If they will not go, then take the puppy outside for a walk in a personal setting. Be alone with the dog, span. No distractions. No dogs or people. You're the only sensory inputs which the dog might need to take care of. This makes the task much easier. When you have educated the dog one thing, be certain all family members and friends use the identical technique of communicating. The puppy has a limited capability, which can be large enough, but it's going to be wasted when it must find three ways to sitsix approaches to come here, etc. When it's your pet, take responsibility and get different folks to tackle the puppy on your way or leave the animal alone.

Your dog learns really Fast and easily with the binary procedure. Together with the binary procedure, the puppy learns quite a lot and very quickly. In addition they learn by institution. The binary procedure is the way we start a puppy's instruction and it works wonders for dogs or dogs that are new. The institution system is for afterwards, as soon as your puppy has learned the fundamentals and is ready for more. We are going to discuss the binary process first, and institution in later sections of the report.

What Is the binary procedure? Binary signals two. There are just two things your dog must learn from you. That is all, two. Everything else follows from there. Once they have discovered those 2 items, you have got it made in the shade. Your puppy will grow to be the very obedient, happy small fur monster on the road. And she will be prepared to find out more. After a dog has picked the binary procedure, there is no going back, she thinks like a person.

In my walks with my puppy, I show off her to individuals And let them know about the binary procedure. "There are two things your dog must learn and once it has, she can learn everything else. Do you know what those two things are?" I inquire. I am amazed at the answers I receive, and have yet to listen to the right reaction. "Patience and humility," one man says. I have not taught my puppies humility however, so I need to refrain from laughing at a few of those stabs at a really straightforward idea. Does he think I'm prepping her Divinity College?

What are Those 2 items you have to first educate your four legged Helen Keller? Here we go - Yes No. Yes, you're permitted to perform something. No, you aren't permitted to do something. That is the first lesson to teach your puppy. Once he/she has discovered these 2 theories, everything else you are trying to have it to perform is very much simpler to achieve. Two things, thus the binary procedure.

How Can I instruct the dog both of these Seemingly simple theories? First, substitute the term Yes using the term Okay. The term No stays No. So that is exactly what you wish to educate the dog. Alright, and No.

If You've Got a dog that does not like food, then take it Back, for a refund, it is likely not a puppy. If your puppy does enjoy food and is drawn to a specific deal then have a purse of these treats at exactly the same time. The smaller the cure, the better. Little treats allow you lots of repetitions of this lesson before the dog catches on. It may take many repetitions of a lesson prior to the puppy accomplishes, but it is going to surprise you how couple times each puppy has to be revealed something to find out it entirely. Ordinarily, a very simple notion is learned in below ten repetitions.

Inform The puppy the next,"Lucy! Watch!' And point to your eye with your finger touching your face below the eye. Do this each time you start a lesson. Repeat it a couple of times and then start the lesson. In the beginning, it is meaningless to the puppy, but it is going to pay off because the puppy will have heard YOU ARE TEACHING SOMETHING.

Now Put the dog at the Sitting place on the ground or floor. Say'Lucy, Sit' clearly and clearly because you get it done. The easier the control the greater. 1 syllable, how much easier can it be. After the puppy is sitting and just when the puppy is sitting, place a minumum of one little treat on the ground around one foot in front of her. Give her a treat for sitting. Leave another food in sight near by.

Always, always preface an action control Together with the puppy's name. "Lucy, Sit", "Lucy, Come Here." There is a really good reason behind this. The puppy learns its title , but more importantly, she discovers she is being treated at the instant. Whenever you're using a bunch of individuals and do not use her name here's exactly what the dog perceives:"... bla bla bla bla bla bla bla - sit - bla bla bla bla bla." The'Sit' got lost in all of the bla bla. The puppy has tuned out you as you are all speaking gibberish and boring her to death. Give the puppy a warning that something is forthcoming. First pause your speaking and state'Lucy!" Pause until you see her respond, then give her the control -"Sit!" , making the hands gesture as you can.

All dog training will be to Be accomplished with'theatre'. I feel the dog reacts to signs initially, and because they are accompanied by voice commandsthey will react to this latter on it's own at a later date. Always, always offer a control with hand signs or other sorts of visual cues to get started. I call it 'theatre'. I've a'Come Here' sign that my puppy can see and reacts to when she is too far off to listen: I flap up one arm and down from my side.

So going back on the ground already covered, inform your Puppy to'Sit' by putting her firmly but softly in the sitting posture. Give her a treat when she sits. If you say'Lucy, Sit', create a hand gesture by placing your entire hand. Any puppy that's worth its salt won't immediately comply with the command, he/she will lunge to the meals onto the ground. That is instinctual behaviour, to consume. Dogs, particularly Labs, can write the book on'There is food, therefore I eat'. That is exactly what you are expecting for the puppy to perform. There are just a few things that inspire a puppy more than meals, particularly a puppy.

Wait a minute. When the Dog pliers in the sitting position to make it to the food, this is where you leap in. Put your hands, palms and hands outstretched securely, right in the front of her face and say in a loud, unmistakably officious tone'NO!" Just like a traffic cop. No, means no, you twit, and if you proceed that automobile one inch I'm hauling your idiot supporting to jail. That is exactly what I mean by theater. The hand is throw aggressively, the tone of voice is intense and stentorian, and the appearance in your otherwise nice face is mean and nasty. You might also preface the entire charade using a'Psssshhhht!" Which distracts the puppy and gets its own focus on the origin of the odd sound.

As Soon as You've given her this quite Theatrical admonition, sit back down, and say"Wait until I say OKAY," highlighting the term OKAY by pointing into your lips. The puppy at this time is simply confused. After three or four tries to lunge for the meals she will sit down and wait patiently. She will not go for the meals. Ensure that she does not get food before she does exactly what you desire. This is essential. It is not unkind. You are using positive stimulation to find a desirable outcome. Your boss does it to you every week using a paycheck.

The Puppy has learned by institution to take a seat. It is from pleasurable stimulation. Each time I sit gives me a deal. The ideal thing to do would be to sit he'll give me a puppy treat. I really don't understand what the hell he wants but I do understand to sit. I really don't understand why he is preventing me from getting that food on the market, but he is nice enough once I sit , so I'll sit down.

After The puppy has learned to sit down and remain silent without lunging to your meals, then you'll allow her to receive it. You may say in a gentle and mild tone,'Lucy, Okay get it," and point to the meals.

Here Is What the Dog is believing. If I choose that food he is going to shout at me and place me back and say"Sit' again. I am not going for this. I am sitting here. If I sit gives me treats. If you have waited until your puppy is unsure of things to do at this stage, you've done the ideal thing. Your pet is afraid to choose the food and will not budge at it. It'll ask consent with head motions toward the meals. At this time it has not a clue what OKAY means.

So today you will show your puppy what acceptable Means, and softly lift off its buttocks the ground and permit it to approach the snacks, all of the while saying'Okay, Lucy, get it' in sweet tones and pointing into the meals. You might even transfer the food nearer until it is within reach for your first couple of iterations.

When he states OKAY and Pushes me toward the meals, he appears to be saying it is quite okay when I go get it. So that is what OKAY means. Eureka, I do it!

With Roughly five repetitions of the exercise that your puppy will have learned the distinction between Okay, I'm enabled and No, I'm prohibited. It really learned the 2 theories employing the institution strategy, but it has an instrument, known as the binary procedure, where all other behavioral theories are learned. Everything, from Come Here, to Heel, to Don't Go In The Street will probably be much easier to teach. A lot of things have to be heard by means of a dog. No pooping or peeing in the home. No jumping on people or other dogs. No downtime when not known for. Come Here, Sit, Inside, Outside, Go to Sleep, Get Up, Get , Stop That, Be Quiet, Get In, Get Out, Heel, Lie Down, Stay Here, Wait... the list is very long.

All Learning has to be bolstered. When you begin to learn multiplication in mathematics, your instructor will review inclusion . She'll also teach the innovative notion of multiplication using the inclusion classes as a stepping stone. "Add ten plus ten. How much is that? Twenty. Right. How many times did we add ten? Twice. We added ten two times to get twenty. How much, therefore, is Two times Ten?" Educate furry Helen, the Okay and No controls every lesson prior to instructing her Come Here, or to Wait Until I Say Okay (Stay). Furry Helen will be quick to learn that this concept in the three months old for a kid of eight may find out the times tables.

A puppy is very similar to a person in Intellectual developmental skills. In this 1 lesson, your four Legged Helen Keller has heard quite many vital things. One, you're In control of everything. Food, most significantly. Two, collaboration means Positive stimuli like food and love, defiance means damaging Stimuli, for example disapproval and refusal of meals. A puppy, as a part of a Family seeks acceptance and positive reinforcements and avoids unwanted stimuli. If it prefers negative stimulation you have got a neurotic in your hands. Neurotic dogs, like individuals, are created, not born, and Now's that the Time for Cesar to perform his magical since this is where his strategy Outshines others, rehabilitating a tired dog. Thirdly, your pet Has learned when you are attempting to teach it some thing to allow it to fit into A family of people. Finally but above All, the puppy will have Heard the binary process and may even learn how to ask permission like Lucy does when she wants to sleep on the sofa. She stops and waits for An OKAY before leaping up.

[yossarian359]

2001: A Gay Oddity

Red flooded Lena’s face, “Oh, h-hey Cap,” her plans to wave hello to her superior were foiled as she remembered that her right hand was stuck far down Widowmaker’s pants. “Oh, bugger me.”

An odyssey of oddities as our two favourite lesbians discover all that's crazy in the universe as they jump between infinite realities.

All things considering, it was a pretty average day in the life of Lena Oxton. Got up, had a shower, had a wank, made breakfast, joined the team for a boring old payload mission. And—ah yes—soaked through and through, on top of a construction site in a lightning storm; having a life and death fight with her frenemy with benefits.

Perfectly normal. At least for now.

The sky lit up in a brilliant dash of lightning, followed moments later by the crashing of thunder all arounder her. Tracer landed flat on her back on the edge of a steel beam, winded. She stared up to where she was just thrown off. A figure; purple, blue, and slender dropped down, heeled metal boots landing firm on the beam jutting out into oblivion. Finally, a grin flashed on her face as she spoke.

“Looks like it’s over, isn’t it?” Her sultry voice downing out the rain falling around them.

“Oh, save it, love,” said Tracer, “Can we please just skip to the snogging today?”

Widowmaker groaned, “Let me enjoy my victory, chérie.”

Tracer rolled her eyes, smiling, “Fine, fine. When you’re ready.” She motioned for her to continue.

Snapping back into character, Widowmaker chuckled, smirking evilly. “Oh, mon petit chou, I’ve won, you’ve lost, and now,” she stepped forward, slinging her sniper rifle to her back, “I get to claim my reward.”

“Oh yeah? Why don’t you come and take me?” Tracer said through gritted her teeth.

“I would like nothing more,” Widowmaker hummed, “But first, I want to truly savour this moment having beaten you.” She swayed her hips as she leant forward, crossing her legs in what was most certainly a ballet pose. Lena had to consciously stop herself from rolling her eyes. I just had to go and fall in love with the queen of extra.

She continued, “You are the perfect fly wandering in my web. You know, ever since I was a little girl, I had a fear of spi—”

In the space of two blinks Tracer had reversed their positions and was straddling Widowmaker’s torso.

Widowmaker landed on her back with audible discomfort, “That’s hardly fair, chérie.” She grunted.

“First, that monologue was going somewhere cringy, love, and second,” Tracer leaned in, dangerously close to Widowmaker’s lips, “there are much better things you could be doing with your pretty mouth.”

“So impatient, mon coeur, ” her smile turned coy, “Is that all I am, just a pretty mouth?”

Tracer responded by crashing their lips together in a kiss that very quickly grew heated. “You’re too bloody sexy. It shouldn’t be legal,” she said when she pulled back.

Widowmaker laughed enjoying how easily flushed Tracer became. She also enjoyed the way that her hands wasted little time unzipping her catsuit and sliding down to trace the curve of her stomach. Falling, lower, lower.

Suddenly her eyes went wide. “Merde, Lena!” she said with abrupt desperation.

“Bit early for you to be screaming my name, love,” said Lena, confused.

“Lena, what are you doing?!”

She froze at the new voice entering the scene. Seeing Widowmaker’s horrified expression, she turned to where her girlfriend was looking and saw Ana Amari standing with her mouth open, stunned.

Red flooded Lena’s face, “Oh, h-hey Cap,” her plans to wave hello to her superior were foiled as she remembered that her right hand was stuck far down Widowmaker’s pants. “Oh, bugger me.”

Thankfully, the universe decided to save them from embarrassment as they were promptly struck by lightning and the world went white.

---

Widowmaker was the first to realise something was wrong.

“Something is wrong,” she said.

“Yeah,” Lena said slowly, “You’re upside down love.”

She looked up to see Widowmaker, upside down standing on a ceiling even though there wasn’t a ceiling. “Lena… What am I standing on?” she said, then gravity kicked in and she fell on Lena who was sitting on the floor even though there wasn’t a floor.

The sky decided to materialise in the form of dark grey rain clouds. A series of depressed grey buildings leaped up from the ground, did an appalling dance in the air, and landed lamely to from a sprawling suburb of mediocrity. In the distance someone was shouting expletives at a dog while several big plumes of smoke spilled into the unhappy sky.

“Bugger!” Lena shouted, eyes wide in horror . “We’re in Scunthorpe !” She spat the word as if it were the most vile place on earth (it was). “Also, I think we were just struck by lightning which means my chronal accelerator has been temporarily overcharged.” She looked down to see that the light in the centre of her accelerator was changing colours at an almost seizure inducing speed.  

It started raining very heavily. Lena wiped a smidge off and stuck her finger in her mouth. Mmm, jam. “What does that mean?” asked Widowmaker.

“What, the jam?”

“No, petit idiote! ” Widowmaker exclaimed, wiping the jam from her face, “What happened to your accelerator; what does that mean for us?”

“Oh, right. That. Yes, well…” Lena grimaced, because one of the factories in the distance had come alive and decided to sing the entirety of the H.M.S. Pinafore in the voice of Dame Judi Dench. “Means were sorta stuck in the slipstream, and cause it’s overcharged it means that we’re ping ponging between infinite realities.”

“Okay.” Widowmaker’s eyes went distant.

“Hey, cheer up love, Winston will get us back in a jiffy! He did it last time this happened. All we gotta do is wait for a bit.”

Widowmaker narrowed her eyes at her. “You’ve been struck by lightning before? That’s impossible, even for you.”

“Not impossible,” Lena protested, “Just very, very improbable. Actually, it happened three times, the first time I fell into a power line.”

A smacking could be heard as Widowmaker brought her palm hard on her forehead. “Why am I not surprised.” Widowmaker then noticed something very odd about her girlfriend. “Lena…” She trailed off, swallowing thickly, “Why have you turned into a dog?”

“Wha-” she barked, and looked down to see four paws and a furry body. “Oh, for fuck sake!” she pouted. “Why does it always happen?”

Widowmaker resting-bitch-face finally broke as she laughed. “You’re so incredibly cute, ma chien.”

“Stop staring at me!” Lena whined, “It’s embarrassing.” A series of sad noises came from her snout. Widowmaker couldn’t resist taking her petite amie in her arms and stroking the back of her head between the ears till her hind leg started pounding in excitement.

“When I said I wanted to see you on a leash, chérie, this is not quite what I had in mind.” Widowmaker hummed.

“Shut up,” she panted, “Don’t you dare fucking stop that. Oh yes!”

Sadly, Lena’s fun was interrupted as the ground underneath them turned into a pit of multi-coloured balls.

Widowmaker was first to panic, shooting her grappling hook up into nothingness as she lost her footing in the endless ditch of balls. “Help!”

Lena on the other hand pranced quite easily out of the humiliating danger, enjoying the sight of the world's deadliest assassin struggle to find her footing in a four-foot ball-pit. “Lena, I’m drowning!”

“No, you’re not.” Lena woofed.

“Lena, could you help us resolve something?” a rather irritated voice croaked. It was Lucio, who was, quite unimaginatively, a frog in this universe.

“Sure thing Lucio, love the shirt by the way.” Lena barked and then followed the frog to the cafe in the middle of a shopping mall from 2022’s Estonia. They passed a purple iguana drinking a margarita (most likely Sombra) and stopped at a table where a rabbit the size of a minivan was waiting for them.

Lucio hopped up on the table and gestured to his much larger partner. “Watch this,” he clears his frog throat, “D.va, tell me again why you don’t love me.”

The bunny, who unimaginatively represents D.va in this universe, replied with a mouth full of Cheetos. “Because you’re crazy.”

“Why am I crazy?” he asked.

“Because you love me.”

“And why am I crazy for loving you.”

“Because I’m crazy.”

“So: you won’t love me because I’m crazy, I’m crazy because I love you, this makes me crazy because you’re crazy, therefore, you are crazy and think this.”

“Yup.”

Lucio turned to Lena who was now a fox. “You see the problem?”

The solitary gear turned slowly in her little fox head. “So, you won’t love him because you think he’s crazy.”

“Correct,” the rabbit replied between bites.

“And you think he’s crazy because he loves you,” Lena asked, pausing while waiting for the bunny to nod, “and that makes him crazy because you think you’re crazy, which means he’s loving someone crazy. But if he didn’t love you, that’d mean you’d love him because he would no longer be crazy and you would love him?”

“Yes,” D.Va replied, taking an excruciatingly long sip from a chocolate raspberry milkshake.

“But if he doesn’t love you,” Lena shouted, “Then that defeats the whole fucking point dunnit?, ‘Cause then you’d love him but he doesn’t love you!” Lena became so angry at this that she turned back into a human. “The fuck you on about, mate? You’re hurting my head.”

Widowmaker had finally caught up with the love of her life and greeted her by smacking the back of the head with her gauntlet.

“Ow!” Tracer yelped, “What the fuck was that for, gorgeous?”

“I will hurt your head so much more, you beautiful little shit!” Screamed Widowmaker who slammed Lena into a suffocatingly tight hug, “Do not leave me alone with balls ever again.”

When she withdrew, Lena saw coloured plastic balls stuck in Widowmaker’s hair, makeup smeared on her face, and her expression explaining how she just survived the apocalypse.

“Hey,” said Lena softly, “Don’t worry, love. Let’s get back home and I can ride your face, yeah? I know that always makes you feel better.”

Widowmaker hugged her again and made muffled happy content noises. The multiverse was kind this time and deposited them back in Lena’s London apartment, even going through the trouble to position them so that the smaller woman was straddling Widowmaker’s face.

“Ah,” Lena sighed, “Much better.”

“So, ma chérie,” Widowmaker brought her hands up to caress Lena’s hips, “You promised a little face-sitting adventure?”

Lena cursed herself for finding that statement far more seductive than it ever should have been. “You bet your pretty blue arse.”

The front door very suddenly came crashing down. “Oi!” came Lena’s voice from the otherside of the room, “The fuck you doin’ in my house?”

“Wha-?”

“You. Gay cunt. Off my bed.” Lena turned her head around to see Lena in the doorway. Only that she was dressed in wine red and black. The accelerator in her chest glowed an ominous dark orange which complimented the angry scowl on her face.

“Aren’t you me?” Lena asked offended, whilst removing her thighs from Widowmaker’s face. “That means you’re gay too, you edgelord wanker!”

As if on cue, the other Widowmaker, or Amélie in this case, walked in behind the angry small Lena and sat comfortably on a chair while crossing her legs. “She has you there, ma chérie.”

“Who are you?” asked Widowmaker to the woman who looked like her sitting on the chair like she owned the place.

“I’m you, but better,” she replied in a nonchalant manor. She wore a uniform reminiscent of the old overwatch, a blue hat that complimented her fair skin and dark hair.

“What are you doing here, lesser me? ” The edgelord Lena demanded.

“No idea,” said Lena indignantly, “Got struck by lightning and—”

“You got struck by lightning? Clumsy bitch.”

“Oi, you stupid lesbian hypocrite! Why are you here?”

“Hush, chéries,” Amélie soothed, “Let's not be antagonistic,” a playful smirk appeared on her face, “I have a feeling we can get up to all kinds of exciting fun, the four of us…”

“What are you saying?” said both Lenas in unison.

“I think,” started Widowmaker, still lying on the bed with a suggestive grin, “I’m beginning to like me.”

Another large crack in the sky interrupted their pleasantries as the clouds parted to reveal a large hand stretching out from the abyss. The laws of physics stretched and turned, paused, did a triple somersault and soliloquised a section from Othello before propelling the original Lena and Widowmaker upwards into the heavens.

They passed the thermosphere stupendously quickly before soaring out into a sea of stars.

Far above the moon, they saw Planet Earth was blue and there was nothing they could do.

Though I’m past one hundred thousand miles, I’m feeling very still. I thinks my spaceship knows which way to go.Tell my wife I love her very much, she kn—

“Lena, will you stop singing?” Widowmaker snatched the acoustic guitar from her hands, “We’re not even in a spaceship, and I’m not your wife!”

“Well, not yet.” she wiggled her eyebrows, earning her a glare from the Widowmaker. Lena rubbed the back of her head with a free hand as they passed Ceres in the asteroid belt, hurtling towards the orbit of Jupiter.

In the shadow of the gas giant they were abruptly stopped by an unknown entity.

The Galilean moons all halted in their orbit. Jupiter’s magnetic field fluctuated wildly, flinging away it’s smaller moons and rings clinging to the planet’s gravity well. The gas giant grew larger and larger before the eyes of the two women suspended in space.

Suddenly—with a dramatic crash of the orchestra playing Also Sprach Zarathustra somewhere offscreen—the mass amounts of hydrogen in its atmosphere lit up, ignited, and Jupiter became a star.

Light from the star refracted, bent, curved, and tried out on so many different shapes and sizes before settling on 600 trillion hertz, lluminating the hidden solar system inside Jupiter’s gravitational field, revealing the Galilean moons in all it’s breathtaking beauty. Widowmaker’s hand found Lena’s in the void of space as they silently watched the dance of celestial bodies, moving in time with the heavens. An aurora of light and colour bathed them as they floated in the sublime darkness of space.

The awe inspiring tranquility transcended reality when a massive shimmering veil of silver glass materialised and fell away like dust, to reveal a glittering entity walking on a sunbeam (Jupiter beam?)

Cosmic wind whisked around it, the centre of the universe seemed to shift and a sense of awe and humbleness flooded the two women witnessing the divine being revealing themselves before them.

The deity was a man with dark hair slightly slicked back, a rather kind welcoming face which was complemented by the presence of thick smart glasses.

“Hi,” he said, in a rather soothing voice with a hint of femininity, “I’m God, but, you may call me Jeff from the Overwatch Team.”

Lena and Widowmaker were warmed to his presence and offered their own greetings:

“Hiya.”

“Salut.”

“As you may know,” he continued, “I have a very important announcement to make regarding the future of Overwatch. There will be significant changes in the next patch that will be affecting you two in particular.”

“Wait,” Lena began, “If you’re God, then why did you reveal yourself to us?”

Jeff looked confused, “Sorry?”

“You’ve just proved you exist by turning that planet into a sun and by sayin’ hi, giving us irrefutable evidence of your existence. But, irrefutable evidence means you don’t need faith, but people need faith to believe in you. So by showing up, you’ve just proved you don’t exist! Also, if you’re all powerful and can do anything, can you create a stone too heavy for you to lift? Another thing: does the tree make a noise? Which ship is Theseus’? Is there a teapot goin’ round the sun?”

The look of confusion increased further. Thankfully though, a sharp elbow stopped Lena in her line of theological ramble. “Ouch! that hurt, love.” She whined.

“Thank you, Widowmaker,” Jeff said warmly.

“My apologies,” she chimed, “Please, you were saying?”

“Ah yes, my announcement...”

Widowmaker couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement, though she suppressed it in the face of her creator. What was the announcement regarding her and Lena? More plot, maybe a couple character interactions and flirtatious lines?

Or maybe even canonization! She dared to hope. The thought sent excited tingles through her body though she remained as tsundere as possible. Jeff could sense her excitement (he was God after all) and smiled.

“One thing is first though,” he warned. His eyes suddenly turned a gleaming red that was far too bright as his voice dropped into a thundurus bellow.

“ALL THESE WORLDS ARE YOURS - EXCEPT EUROPA

ATTEMPT NO LANDINGS THERE”

And as quickly as that happened, he returned to normal.

Widowmaker shared a quick look with her girlfriend, Lena looked just as confused as she was.

“Now, back to the update. I have a feeling you guys will be pretty excited about the next comic as—”

---

The anticipation that had been building up vanished into excruciating disappointment as just before Jeff was about to reveal the truth, they were both chucked out of the slipstream, materialising back into reality on the dank construction sight they started on.

It was probably another cop out event comic anyway.

“Ah Lena, there you—” Winston was stopped dead in his tracks when he saw that Lena’s hand was still stuffed down the enemy's pants. “You’re in public,” he said, plainly putting his large paw to his face, “Just so you know.”

“Hmm,” Widowmaker murmured, “I have a feeling ma chérie enjoys it that way.”

Quite an ecstatic laugh that sounded more like a mating call indicated that Sombra was nearby. “You are a disaster, araña!” said Sombra as she appeared behind them. “A walking gay disaster.”

Widowmaker took that in stride, no point in denying it. “I preferred you as an iguana, ‘ombre,” she counted, to which Sombra’s only response was the slight furrowing of the brow in a silent ‘Que?’

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?” Soldier 76 yelled as he ascended the long stairs, out of breath.

Sombra touched up her nails with the nail filer she managed to conjure up. “I’m chillin’ out, el viejo, ” she said, sitting down on a beam and crossing her legs in a nonchalant manner. “You should too, before you give yourself a hernia.”

They weren’t spared from Soldier 76’s booming voice just yet as he caught sight of Lena and Widowmaker. “AND WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?”

“Calm down, Jack.” Ana soothed as she was getting out her thermal flask to pour everyone a post-battle cup of tea.

Winston decided it would be a good time to relax and took a seat with a thud that shook the platform slightly. “I mean, everyone knew anyways.”

“Oh, you did?” Lena asked, finally removed her hand from her girlfriend’s trousers. “Coulda bloody told us! Instead of making us sneak around and all that.”

“Oh?” chimed Widowmaker, lowering her gaze in an attempt to be seductive. “I thought you said that being clandestined was exciting, mon coeur.”

A positively evil grin formed on Lena’s face, she leant to her lover’s ear and whispered something that caused the periwinkle lady to turn a dark purple blush. She withdrew after nibbling and earlobe; offering a small tease for later. Unfortunately, Lena’s cool was ruined as Widowmaker crashed their lips together, makes a flushed lewd mess of Lena in the process.

“Woah, love.” she breathed, “That’ll do.”

Soldier 76 shook his head. “You knew?” he turned his gravelly attention to Ana who shrugged her shoulders.

“I suspected.” A cheeky smirk grew on Ana’s face, “What, you don’t ship it? Isn’t that a bit hypocritical of you, Jack? Whatever would Gabriel say?”

Jack turned away, conceding this round and muttering a bunch of old man insults under his breath.

“Oh, man,” piqued Lucio as he arrived at the scene. “It happen again? Wait, were frog me and bunny D.Va stillhaving that argument?”

“Yup.” Answered Tracer.

“For the record,” D.Va added, “You are crazy.”

“Yeah, but you love me.” he replied, and D.Va stuck her tongue out as there was little use denying him.

Suddenly, Lena remembered something. “Winston, just out of interest: what’s on Europa?”

Her best friend’s eyes went wide at the mention of that moon’s name. “Lena, trust me, you don’t want to know…”

“Okay, guess I don’t.” she trailed off, and a nice gay tranquility—only disturbed by Jack’s old man noises—fell onto the group as they watched the sun rise.

---

Fin.

#WidowTracer #overwatch fanfic #Widowmaker #tracer #comedy #shitpost #crack #lmaowhathaveIdone #jeff from the overwatch team #2010: a space odyssey references

[ikonislife]

Better Together.

-Bobby x Reader

-Expecting parents au, fluff

-Here for You is another dad!Jiwon request I had. This request came in right after so I guess in a way, they’re in conjunction with one another. You don’t really have to read them together since they’re pretty much stand alone pieces but it’s nice to have a small continuation. Anyways, here ya go! 10 years late but I did it!!!

The world suddenly seemed so much bigger now that your range of mobility was limit to three feet out your front door, and occasionally down the street for a short walk with your dog, in which you’re no longer allowed to hold the leash. As per your doctor order? God no! In fact, your doctor always commented on how well taken care of you were at every single appointment. This preposterous house arrest is of course, as per your husband ordered. 

Jiwon had been beyond amazing throughout your whole pregnancy despite missing nearly every single parent-in-training class due to iKon’s hectic tour schedules. Possessing the vast knowledge of one book on pregnancy for dummy he once read before realizing that nothing the books offered could possibly save him from your fifth mood swing of the hour, nor the guilt he constantly feel watching you cried from the sheer endless aching of carrying a new life. Yet there he was every time your eyes glossed over with a new insane craving or another hormonal whine fest about how unfair it is that you’re the only one looking like a duck had swallowed a planet waddling around whilst he, dashing and breaking heart as ever. Every time you panic, every time you’d freak out over every little thing, he’d be there holding your hand, calm as a swan to guide you through. Even if only moments later you caught him on the brink of tear, rapping at top speed on the phone with Hanbin, no doubt letting lose all the worries he held back for the sake of your peace of mind. Poor Hanbin, bless his soul for being therapist/consultant for whatever it might be that Jiwon is ringing him up about now. He probably has it harder than you will ever experience because Jiwon has to be taking all that emotion somewhere. He sat through an hour of you ugly crying while sobbing because you lost the allan wrench that came with your new shelf. Even when Jiwon had presented another shiny allan wrench from another set of table he had saved after putting it together the week before, you were still bawling like a baby that it weren’t the same. The collection of bags under his eyes were at this point more extensive than your designer one that he had gifted you through the years. He took it all with the grace and braveness of a new dad, without ever letting you hear his complaints. 

Jiwon, your dear husband, he’s god sent, best you could’ve ever ask for so why was it you were screaming his name off the top of your lungs, muddling it with a strings of obscene curses? Well because it’s well into your 2nd hour of labor pain, which will only get worse from here as informed by your kind team of nurses. The insane hours of pain feels much like the wave crashing the shore, except, instead of the soothing water of the ocean and sunshine of the beach, it was waves of fire, and knives, and molten lava because all you could feel is searing pain. Jiwon sits beside you, his face had contorted into something so twisted he might as well check himself in for some surgery to morph it back to the handsome face he possessed before dropping all his schedule to rush to your side.

“Baby, does it hurt mu-” His whisper chopped off as quick as it had surfaced by a small yelp elicited by your nails digging into his palm. Now he had braved probably just as much pain as you had letting you clawed at him, pinched him, hold him to a point of bruising yet not even a whimper of complain. He knows whatever discomfort he might feel will never, ever be worthy enough to compare to what you’re about to go through.

“Does it hurt, Jiwon? Does it HURT? Are you seri- Oh my fucking shit. Are you being serious right now?” The audacity of this man to sit here and question whether or not you’re really in pain. Does he still not know how it work after the half an hour of you going into an hysterical rant, explaining in excruciating details of how babies are born?

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know it hurts a lot. What can I do?” 

“Do you, Jiwon? I just had three different people shoved their hand up my damn vagina in the last hour alone while humming “not ready yet” like I’m a freaking pie in the oven all the while being display like a freaking 150 pounds piece of really shitty art made by someone with no artistic sense whatsoever for everyone to see. Do you really know?” Damn, Jiwon would be proud with how fast and powerful you had just gotten that sentence out in one single breath if he weren’t so scare, being married to a rapper really has it perk.

“I’m sorry. I’m here, hit me, scream at me all you want okay? But you gotta calm down baby... The doctor said getting upset isn’t good for little Y/n. What can I do?” Instinctively, just as he had all these years when the world becomes a little too much for you to handle, Jiwon pulls you into his arms, never mind your harsh words or that his left palm is now bleeding from how rough your hold on his hand were. He places a kiss on your sweaty forehead, with the good hand running through your matted hair. If Jiwon could be pregnant instead, he would. 

He had always been the one bugging you to get pregnant, although never quite mad, Jiwon had gotten short with you once before when you expressed your nonchalantness with having kids. He wants to take it all back now. How could he be so selfish, how could he make you carry a life just because he wants a mini Jiwon or mini Y/n when you weren’t ready. He had forgotten seeing Hanbin and his wife went through so much trials and tribulation with their twins, or how hard it was on Chanwoo’s wife when she had complication with their first born so he so selfishly blamed you for still not having someone to call him “dad”. What a screw up he is for blaming you, the only person that was willing to take him at his best and at his worst without ever questioning his intention. 

“Get me some water... as much ice as you can.” You whimper out and he nods furiously, not knowing how else to help. A heavy sigh left your lips just as his shadow bolts out the door behind him. You know how harsh all this was on him, and of all his fears but the pain had blinded you for the past few hours.

“Baby, here.” He rushes back to your side, thankful to see a more rested form of his wife smiling back. Lifting a few spoonful of cold salvation to your lips, he settles happily when you lean into him as you satisfyingly crunches on the ice.

“Jiwon... I’m sorry.” You mewl out, much to his surprise. 

“Whatever for, honey? You did nothing wrong.” Eyes widen, for the first time since arrival he was met with your tearful features even with the gut punches your body was preparing to welcome the baby are still rolling in with full force.

“I-I know all I’ve been doing is yell at you. First all I do is complain, now I just yell and hurt you. I don’t want you to think this is me now... I said it before, I’ll say it now. I’m happy to be able to welcome my child with you, our child. I know I don’t say it enough, or at all, but Kim Jiwon, you’re an amazing person.”

“Stop it, love. I’m far from perfect. I always expect this thing to be easy breezy, you know? I’ve seen Jinhwan hyung did it, then Yunhyeong hyung... Even Hanbin, and June, and the maknae. I just, I don’t know. I guess it’s not as easy when we do it ourselves, huh?” That strange chuckle, signature of your husband rings out so dearly and suddenly your heart is at peace. You snuggle further into his chest despite the strange position you both had taken on with the soon to be gone bump in between. “Like I said before, you’re the most beautiful person in this world and I thank God everyday for giving me you.” 

You must be looking like a rag doll after a tsunami but his words and those loving eyes just make you feel like a million dollars. His fingers find their way back to your face pushing away a few stray strand of hair as they would always do before he so tenderly presses a gentle kiss on your lips. Jiwon holds it there for what felt like eternity as he lets his heart and soul sear you with all his love, only parting way once the footfall could be heard leading to your room. 

Once more you experience what could only be describe as a frog prepared to get dissected during bio class, what’s with being prod at, poke, and examine. Another 4 excruciating hours and a few laps around the maternity ward later to loosen your muscles, you were prepped and primed for the main event. The world feels like such a blur, as if suddenly the Earth had decided to go on a race with its sibling planets. Blurs of people running in and out of the room, blurs of faces telling you to push, blurs of the incessant beeping of all the machineries, blurs of pain. In the blurry faded world flashing in front of your eyes, his face remains clear as day right beside you. Jiwon has his arms around you like he always had been when he walked you through rough spots in life. 

For God knows why, your memories rushes back to the day you had thought your journey with him was to end, back to the days of being young and being careless. You had gotten tired of waiting, angry at him for always leaving but too foolish to realize there were millions of other solutions before separating. “Let’s break up” you had said simply and watched as he said simply, “No.” Before you had realized what was going on, he already had his arms around you before repeating one more time, “No.” You were angry at first, the blatant disrespect he was showing by refusing to hear you but then you broke down crying in his arms and held him the tightest you’ve ever held anyone. “My naive girl, what make you think pushing me away will be the answer to your pain of never having me around? Did you think that parting way forever will help you get over how much you miss me? Because let me tell you right now, if you love me as I do you, that’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever come up with because i can’t even fathom how much it hurt not to have you in my life.” And he held you for the next hours as you both snuggling up on your old worn couch, then the rest of the night when you buried your head in his chest while listening to his sweet, sweet voice. “When you’re thirsty, you drink water. When you’re hungry, you eat. When you miss someone, you should be with them. I don’t get your ass backward logic, missy. Tell me right now, would you rather me leave right now, and I will if you do. I don’t want to force you into a relationship if you’re already decided you don’t need anymore.” Your response was to pull him closer and never let go.  Just like that night, Jiwon is right where he needed to be and he protects you in his arms even when he doubts that it will help, he holds you anyways. Through the exhaustion and through it all, you smile because you’re all each other got and simply, you’re better together as 3 and counting. 

Then the world stops. A single cry tears through the musty sweat filled air like the clearest bell and all either of you could hear was that cry. The weight of the world lifted off your shoulders when you see the smile on his face, a smile that said you had just been demoted to second favorite as the nurse hands over your bundle of joy. 

“She’s so perfect. God,  I said I wouldn’t cry. Look at me now.” Jiwon half guffaw half chokes on his own tears as he delicately places his lips on her forehead, finger gently caressing her fluffy cheeks. 

“She’s perfect, just like her dad.” You lean back, forgetting that stitches were being placed, that your lower half felt like it had been through a meat grinder. Watching Jiwon holding your sleepy baby close to his chest as he coos “Hi baby, I’m your dad”, you’d go through this again and again. There is nothing more precious in this world than bringing a new life into this world and nothing will surpass the joy of doing it with Jiwon. You’re sure the weeks to come will be both painful and exhausting but seeing the excitement in his eyes as he shows off your daughter to the boys, you know you’re in good hands. 

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