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comfort-person · 1 year

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Forever and always

Synopsis: a nightmare triggers Bucky’s past and the reader has to somehow calm him down from attacking her.

The room was dark, Bucky’s hands were tied down by metal cuffs his whole body restrained as a man stood in front of him “soldier. It didn’t have to be like this.” The man spoke, he wore a long white lab coat. He was a man Bucky didn’t recognise one bit and that was unusual for him, Bucky could remember everyone. “You brought this upon yourself. Okay, bring her in.” As the man moved to the side Bucky watched as you were dragged in- hair a complete mess but that was no comparison to how much fear was in your eyes. He let out a shaky breath his fingers clenching as he grasped at anything he could. He wanted to say something tell them to stop and not to lay a finger on you but the mouth guard in his mouth refrained him from speaking up. “As soon as I say the words in order you will obey me, you will kill her.” The man spoke eyes cold as he stared at Bucky. He shook his head rapidly trying to stop him from speaking trying to get you the hell out of there:

“Longing,”

“Rusted”

“Furnace”

“Daybreak” Bucky’s breathing was uneven his eyes widening his jaw clenched tightly as grunts of pain and resistance left his lips. These assholes had no mercy did they? “Stop it you’re hurting him!” Your voice echoed around the room being the only thing he could truly grasp onto as the last thing to stop him from turning into the monster within “seventeen, benign, nine, homecoming, one…” an agonised cry fell from Bucky’s mouth his eyes full of rage as he struggled in his restraints as he began falling into this character these… monsters… had created. The puppet they had moulded into a good listener. An obedient cruel heartless monster. “Freight car” and as he spoke that was the last thing the winter soldier needed to hear, Bucky escaping from his restraints as he stood up his stature strong and confident as he looked at you as if you were a piece of meat and he was a predator awaiting to pounce “Bucky…” you whispered fearfully. “Kill her.” The man demanded and you watched in silent horror as Bucky charged at you in an inhumanly speed…

“Bucky!”

Bucky gasped awake sitting up sweat covering his entire body, little droplets of sweat trailing down his forehead as he panted hands resting on the material of the bed as he struggled to comprehend what was going on, “Bucky hey… hey…” your arms immediately wrapped around him but he pushed you away with a force he didn’t even realise as you tumbled off of the edge of the bed but managed to get your balance, “no no… n-no… I can’t. Don’t touch me… I don’t want to kill you.” He shook his head not even looking at you fearing that if he did he would kill you. Your heart sank as you gazed at him worriedly “you won’t b-“ “YES I will… he will… I..” he couldn’t even finish his sentence visibly out of breath as he closed his eyes tight trying to open his lungs more, his dog tags skimmed against his skin slightly clattering against each other with every breath he took his metal hand clenching over and over again as he tried to calm down. “Did you have a nightmare again?” You asked cautiously but he didn’t reply to you and you carefully moved to his side as you slowly reached out attempting to rest a comforting hand on his shoulder, you had often dealt with Bucky when he was like this but not to this extent. This was something Steve was more able to handle.

As your hand rested upon his shoulder he flinched and in one quick movement his large metal hand clasped around your wrist keeping a tight grip on it as he looked into your eyes, you could see the fear and torment. The grip was so tight that it hurt but you remained calm “Buck… it’s me.” You rubbed your free hand up and down his back slowly and gently not saying anything for a while, he clearly didn’t know what was going on and he wasn’t going to hurt you.. he was just trying to get a hold of himself. Realise that he indeed was still in control. “It’s me… y/n… it’s me… look at me.” You spoke softly and as he stared at you realisation soon clicked as he realised he had full control over himself a shaky breath leaving his lips as the grip on you loosened before he sat up bowing his head his hands resting against his head as he tried to calm his breathing down his body trembling and you carefully moved your hand to rest on his back as you began soothing against his skin, neither of you had to say a word to realise how much he was going through right now. He just needed you and you’d be right there for him. His body soon weakened against yours as he leaned into you allowing your touch to sooth him completely your lips soon pressing soothing kisses against his forehead, your fingertips smoothing some of his hair off of his forehead as you gazed into his eyes

“It’s okay Bucky… I promise you.” You assured with a comforting smile and he nodded, the tears in his eyes were visible but he tried his hardest to be strong. You both stayed silent as you simply held him, helping him calm down slowly but surely his breathing soon calming down as his eyes fluttered shut a soft shaky breath leaving his lips before he rolled onto his side his arms snaking around your waist as he pulled you close “don’t wanna hurt you.” He whispered against your skin and you lightly shook your head, fingers threading through his hair “you won’t. I promise.” You said softly, noticing the frown on his face “how do you know that I won’t hurt you?” He asked softly concern evident in his voice and you exhaled softly “because I know you wont.” You simply said and he nodded his head, he was plagued with nightmares and memories of killing all those innocent people… he couldn’t catch a break… they haunted his dreams… the screams they let out. Gods was it traumatising. His blue eyes began to darken the more he thought about it and you knew what that meant, you had spent long enough with him to realise that it meant bad and so you gently rubbed your thumb against his cheek leaning in so you could press a kiss to his lips the kiss immediately snapping him out of it “don’t think bad thoughts…” “but I hurt them y/n.” He whispered and you shook your head “he hurt them. You didn’t do anything. Yes your body was there but your mind wasn’t. You aren’t to blame…. Don’t get into that mindset… I love you… you’re my world… I trust you with my life and soul…. I trust you Bucky.” You said softly watching as he seemingly calmed down completely as he cuddled into your embrace his arms remaining tight around you “they’re just nightmares now I promise… not real life. Okay?” And slowly he nodded burying his face into the crook of your neck and you smiled holding him close to your body “I love you.” He said softly and you tightened your arms around him “I love you too, Buck… forever and always.” Feeling him nod as he settled into your embrace,

“Mm… forever and always.”

#bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #winter soldier #bucky x you #comfort #nightmare comfort #james bucky buchanan barnes #marvel #mcu bucky barnes #sebastian stan #comfort imagine #hail hydra #hydra Bucky #the winter soldier #short story #yn x bucky #bucky x y/n #bucky x female reader #bucky x reader

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maiyasuniverse · 1 year

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I Love You

Bucky X Reader

Angst?Fluff

Summary: You're worried about Bucky.

Bucky and steve had been on a mission for a month, with no contact, sleep, or peace. It felt like you were in hell, not knowing what to expect, no one would talk to you about where and how he was because who really knew, and if they did they wouldn't be able to disclose anything to you.

You found yourself sitting on the couch snuggled up in Bucky's leather jacket, the scent was comforting but didn't calm your nerves or tears. It took about five minutes for you to be full-on sobbing, you had let yourself get attached, you wouldn't admit it but you love him.

The sound of keys fiddling at the door pulled you from your thoughts and out of your seat. Bucky took you to get a gun from Alex's last popup at your place. You sat the gun on your lap after perching yourself on the couch. You were no longer afraid of anything, better yet anyone because you could protect yourself, especially inside your home.

The door opened to reveal an injured Bucky and concerned Steve.

"See, I told you she'd be fine, she was ready to blow our heads off." Steve joked with Buck trying to elicit some kind of reaction.

"Oh, my. Oh, my god, Steve what happened?" You got up from the couch not thinking much about what clothes you were wearing not that you cared at the moment. You helped Steve walk Bucky the rest of the way to the couch, and looked at both of the men. Buck was beaten up pretty bad, you also noted that he hadn't said anything.

"We were cornered, the doctor says he'll be fine. He hasn't said anything to anyone since we've been back. I don't know if he's shocked or if his voice is still gone. All I know was that he wanted me to bring him here. Please, call me if you need help with anything the compound isn't far, any time of the day." You could steves words were sincere, he looked a Bucky with sorrow in his eyes, why, had it been his fault the situation happened? You shook the idea from your head.

Steve had seen himself out of the apartment, and you stood there quietly staring at Bucky. He didn't look back, his face was twisted in pain and you weren't sure what to do.

"Buck, I don't know how to help, I'll do whatever you tell me. I'll even drive all the way to that Mexcian place you like even tho it's across town. I'm so stupid." You began scrambling looking for a pen, for him to write with. You could feel the panic building up throughout your body, your hands shaking, and your breath being heavy.

Bucky's vibranium arm was cold against your skin, it made you slow down.

"Calm down Doll, I'll be fine. Just spend some time with me." You listened to his voice and sat beside him. Holding onto the same hand that pulled you from your attack.

"Wait," you turned to fully look at Bucky. "You're talking?" you couldn't help but laugh and he followed suit.

Your laugh turned into sobs, he held you for a while.

"I thought you died, that's why I was sitting in the dark, crying, in your jacket. Pathetic right."

"You're the first person to ever wait for me, I've never had that. I'm sorry, then steve, I don't know what's been going on with him but he wasn't at his job. We were almost killed, and I could only think about you, I couldn't do that to you. I won't. You're not pathetic, I made a promise to you. I'm never going to die on you. I promise."

"I love you." Your eyes went wide and your hand flew over your mouth.

He just chuckled, "I Love you more Doll."

#bucky angst #bucky barnes #bucky fluff #bucky fanfic #bucky fic #bucky imagine #james buchanan barnes #winter soldier #love #romance #short story

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scandinavianfairytale · 1 year

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Hold on

Pairing: Mob Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: implied violence, implied extortion, heartbreak 💔

It'a been three months since Bucky left. Three months since you stood in that hotel, listening to him explaining what happened.

"Bad business deal."

"I have to leave."

"Just for a few weeks."

"I'll be back before you know it."

How he left you in that destroyed hotel room, crying in the middle of all the shards.

He kept calling you from different burner phones, assuring you that he would return once the dust settled. After 6 weeks, you gave up, accepted he might never return. Especially with the police still on his tail.

But it still hurt having to return to the flat you shared with him. His clothes were still in the closet, his toothbrush still next to the sink...it was painful. Since you have been trying to keep it together, you started getting headaches thanks to your constant clenching. Your therapist has told you time and time again that feelings, especially sadness, demand to be felt. But you were far too busy to let your emotions take control. The destroyed hotel room was proof of that.

As you walked through the door and put your things down, the phone rang. Unknown number.

"Hello." You picked up. It almost felt like a routine now.

"My Love. It's so soothing to hear your voice." You remained quiet.

"How was your day?"

"I had better ones..." Bitting your lip, you wondered whether it made any sense to ask him a burning question. "When are you returning?"

"I know it's been too long. I can't wait to hold you in my arms again."

"I miss you."

"Hold on, my Love. I have a feeling that good days are coming and I will be with you sooner than you think."

"I hope so."

Bucky ended the call by saying, "I love you." and while he wanted to hear you say those words again, he only had 65 seconds to make the call. He knew he was still being tracked. However, since he received the news regarding Zemo, he has been making plans on how to get that information to the police to make the stop pursuing him. He needed some more time to trade his freedom for Zemo and kill two birds with one stone.

To be back in your arms and vice versa.

He knew how much you hated him, always saying to hold on... but it was meant for both of you.

"Just hold on a bit longer. I'm coming back for you."

Thank you for reading! 🙏😊

Thw GIF doesn't belong to me - belongs to the amazing creator 😊

I have been writing very short stories again. I can't seem to keep enough focus for a longer one, but I'm glad I am back to writing (-ish) again 💙

I have been obsessed with Smith & Thell these past few weeks 💙

youtube

#bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #mob bucky x reader #mob bucky barnes #mob bucky #mob bucky imagine #sebastian stan #marvel #marvel au #fanfiction #short story

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steviethorn · 2 months

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#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky x you #bucky fanfic #bucky x y/n #bucky x female reader #bucky fic #tumblr polls #poll time #my polls #polls #imagines #headcanon #headcanons #short story

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kiritella · 1 year

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My King - [A Blurb]

��Tell me something strange,” he whispered. His head laid in her lap as the room was still other than the sound of her soft chuckle. Even in the darkness the world, he could imagine her smile, and he smiled with her.

“The world is a masquerade ball, and I have shown up without a mask, unaware that everyone else wouldn’t recognize something real.”

His brows furrowed against the soft tug her fingers made through his hair. “A ball, huh?”

She hummed in agreement. He sat up then, taking her hand in one of his own, this other finding the coffee table beside the couch as he stood, pulling her up with him. Tugging her hand to his lips, he pressed a kiss to her delicate fingers. Her breath paused for a moment, a light gasp or sigh of surprise, and his smile grew.

“Well, then, my lady, might I have this dance?”

“How could I refuse such a charming request, my lord?” she said.

He pulled her toward him and she guided them to the center of the living room. Stepping lightly from side to side on the lush carpets of their ballroom, they swayed in the florescent lighting that seemed like candles hanging high above them in a chandelier. The fading sunlight drifted between the pillars holding their windows in place, and the distant sound of trumpets of sorts hummed its way from the street down below their castle.

“Tell me,” he whispered, his head leaning down and pressing against her temple, “In this masquerade, is there any who has recognized thee?”

“Only one,” she said, “And he is the only one I would have.”

“Is that so?”

“Tis only the truth.”

“And if he could not behold thy beauty, but recognize it merely through the softness of your voice, and the caress of fingers, would you still have him?”

“I would.”

“And if he was a fool, silly and clumsy, would you still dance with him?”

“Every day, if he asked it of me.”

He pulled her hand and spun her around, and her brows furrowed at the trembling of his fingers around hers.

“Jason-”

“And if he stepped on your toes now and again, would ye still be a willing dance partner?”

“The thing about dancing, it that it comes with practice,” she said, leaning up to whisper teasingly. “If he was patient enough to learn with me, yes, I would still dance.”

Slowly, their dance come to a pause as he leaned in until his lips brushed the tip of her ear. “I have one more question for thee, if my lady will permit.”

“Yes?”

“If he is as fine a partner as you say, if he asked you….” he paused as his breaths shook and his hand fumbled at her waist. “If he got down on one knee…” he continued, his hand trailing from her hand to her side, down her back until his knee hit the ground. Her sharp gasp gave him the courage to continue, offering his other hand to her with a ring. “And if he asked you you spend your days dancing with him, and every night beside him, loving him—If he gave you a ring, asking you to wear it so he could feel it pressed against his hand when he held it, what would thine heart say?”

Her choked breaths teased him endlessly until a soft “Yes” put him at ease. He couldn’t even stand as she dropped to her knees in front of him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing kisses from his forehead to his temples, over his milky white eyes, and finally, pressing to his lips. Her laughter bled into his as he searched for her left hand, which she gave so willingly to him. Finding her pinky and shifting to her ring finger, he placed the ring and laughed, wiping the stray tear from sliding down his cheek.

“I-I got Nathan to help me, but—It has daisies on it and an opal--”

She interrupted him with a kiss, smiling so widely it separated them. “The ring is perfect.”

He held her face between his hands, leaning his forehead against hers. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “I apologize, my lady, I didn’t realize this was a competition. Shall I prepare for some duel?”

She laughed, leaning her head back as she did so. Rising to his feet, he pulled her hands to guide her up with him and she followed, leaning into his arms and clasping her hands around him.

“Can we keep dancing?” she asked.

He began swaying again, hands on her hip as he guided them easily in small steps. “Anything you ask, my queen.”

She shook her head, and if the world had any color, he would have seen the flush of her cheeks as she pressed her nose into his neck.

“My king...”

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Forever Tags [Open] - Strikethroughs are broken links

@snarky-starky @thelovelydreamer17 @bugsbucky @herecomesthewriterwitch @rebekahdawkins @urie-bowie-mercury @xsheaxxstilinski @thatskindatwitchy @the-lonely-poet-loves-to-weep @sea040561

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thedrunksoldier · 1 year

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A short stoy about Cosmo and his new friend, a lost Bucky Barnes.

#short story #marvel #bucky barnes #stucky #cosmo #space story

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loving-barnes · 2 years

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Announcement + Short break?

For the last few months, I've been thinking about whether writing fanfiction and "owning" a Tumblr blog is normal and/or healthy for a 27 y.o. lonely, sad, single girl.

And the answer is, I have no fucking clue.

Before you read more, please note that I am not judging anyone in this most and you do what makes you happy. I am not making fun of anyone. It's about me and my struggle in life and trying to figure out what to do.

I love that it makes me want to write and be creative. But there I this voice inside my head saying "it's lame, you are obsessed with a fictional character, it's unhealthy". (I mean, the voice sounds like the girls from my elementary school that used to mock me for writing fanfics).

I always try to think about it as a way of practice before I am ready to write my first novel. And yet I find myself, thinking about how unhealthy this world is for me. But I love this. I love reading all those amazing stories and I love to hide here from reality. And then I realize that this hiding is holding me back.

I have these moments when I am stressed by not being online, present and writing fanfic. I then think I don't have time for anything and have to write and it's just... anxiety the house, I guess.

I fear that this whole world is holding me back.

I am 27, never experienced having a bf, never dated, and don't have a lot of friends and I think it might be because of this..?

I need to overcome my laziness and shyness and start doing something for myself. I want to focus on myself and try other new things. I need to focus on my health and my dog.

So, here's what's going to happen:

I WILL finish Vendetta - one more chapter to go. I also have a bonus chapter in mind and I will also work on that. I want you to know that I will try to post the last chapter asap and the bonus chapter might come later (in a few weeks). If you want to know more, click here: VENDETTA MASTERLIST

Otherwise, I won't be reading your stories or be present here at least until the end of August. After that period, I will come back and have a look, tell you if I wrote something (because I missed it) and post it here.

I planned something. Unfortunately, I don't know whether I will post it here in a few months or not.

Alright, I am rambling.

I need a serious break. It may happen that I'll be back in a week or two.

At this very moment, I know nothing. I want to cry, to be honest.

I'm not even sure if these are the right words I want to put out.

I am lost.

And, as you can read, that's why I need a break. If anyone will actually read this.

Thank you for reading and I will see you later.

If you have any advice on life and how to stop living in my shell and be more social, let me know.

#personal #update #rambling #announcement #hiatus #short hiatus #Bucky Barnes x reader #Vendetta story

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narutardad · 7 months

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Three

Loch was surprised to arrive in Canada and see that there was indeed a S.H.I.E.L.D base. Hidden as a former post office, the jet landed on the roof of a huge brick building on Adelaide Street in Toronto. As they touched down, the Quinjet disengaged stealth mode, and the group within exited onto the roof. Two agents awaited them outside a rooftop fire exit.

"Welcome to the Great White North, Agents." one of the two agent’s said, a wry smile playing on his lips. He seemed to be nearly rocking on his heels in what Loch sensed was excitement. "I'm Agent Burrows, and this is Agent DeSwan. Follow us, please."

Loch followed as the caboose of the march, taking her time to look over the edge of the building to see the streets below. The streets of Toronto were… very similar to New York except there wasn’t hoards of people walking in packs like buffalo. There was a strange smell in the air. Almost like salt water fish in the hot sun.

Entering the building, they were met with more agents who handed them security badges, burner phones and some other identification that they would need. Loch had never really been through all of this before, so when she finally stood there with her fake ID and files piled to her chin, she admittedly felt a little overwhelmed. Lochlyn didn’t even have time to ask any questions before they were escorted to their respective cars to be relocated to their safe houses.

Sam stood next to the two agents who flew with the group and was getting into the large black jeep in front of another smaller car. A dusty grey Nissan that looked like it needed a serious repaint. Bucky was loading several large duffle bags into the trunk of the Nissan and slammed the lid closed.

“Okay.” The soldier began, resting against the side of the vehicle. Sam wandered over and so did Loch. “Everyone knows what we’re doing?”

Sam nodded but Loch shook her head. She hadn’t really been paying attention when Agent DeSwan was briefing them. She was too concerned at looking through all the new documents and things she had been given.

“We’re gonna meet at our rendezvous point at four o’clock. Sam, your safe house is closest to the last known incident. You’re gonna be scoping that area for anything that might tell you where our guy went.”

“Since when were you in charge?” Sam asked with a playful smile. Bucky shot him a disinterested look but continued.

“Loch, you and I are on surveillance duty. We’re just gonna walk around Toronto and see if we can catch this guy in the act. Maybe we can catch him before he does anything else stupid.”

“What do we do if we see him?” she asked, now feeling clod feet creep up on her.

“You’ll stay back and I’ll try and deal with it. If thing’s go sour…”

“You call me and we’ll sort it out. You’re a last resort. Don’t expose our trump card, okay?” Sam finished for his partner, giving Loch a firm but gentle order. Loch nodded, knowing this was very important that she didn’t blow it. This guy was dangerous. And she’d fucked things up before. She couldn’t let it happen again.

“Okay, now that everyone is aware of the plan, we split up and get to work.”

Loch and Bucky piled into the Nissan and Sam into the Jeep. They peeled off in opposite directions, and Loch could finally get a good look at the city up close. She knew she shouldn’t expect much from a large city, but it was… disappointing. Loch saw homeless encampments, people passed out on the sides of the streets, their heads lolled back, dazed. Trash bags lined the curbs the further away from the Post office they drove.

“It’s not… as nice as I thought.” Loch found herself saying out loud. Bucky looked over for a second as they came to a red light.

“Things are tough up here. Especially where we’re going.”

“It’s a shame we can’t help them… S.H.I.E.L.D should help them. They have the money and resources.” Loch mewed slightly, her heart sinking as the neighborhoods seemed to look more like slums.

“S.H.I.E.L.D doesn’t operate like that. You know that. This is for the Canadian government to fix…”

Loch sighed, and her eyes fell on a group of kids standing around a lamp post. They didn’t look much older than fifteen or sixteen, but they were all puffing great white clouds of scented vapor from their tank sized vapes. Lochlyn shook her head and forced herself to look away from the window.

The ride to the safe house wasn’t long after that. No more than ten minutes later they were parked outside a moderate sized house. The windows had closed curtains and the yard was poorly kept. More trash bags lined the end of the drive way and a grey tabby cat sat unmoving on the front porch.

“I guess this is it.” Bucky said as he looked at the house from the car. Loch gazed at the horrendous excuse for a house, and nodded.

The two of them got out of their car, and Bucky grabbed both the duffle bags from the trunk, carrying them over his shoulders like they were filled with feathers. Loch new otherwise, as she had tried to help, only to nearly fall over from the weight.

The inside was no better than the outside. The carpet was stained, but even without the stains that smelled oddly of cat piss, the disgusting grey and brown color of the pattern was an eyesore. The furniture, that looked like it was from the early 90’s, was covered in plastic and a thick layer of dust. The whole main living room smelled like mold, and old cigarettes.

The kitchen was small, modest and filthy. Everything was dusty, and there was old grease splattered and solidified on the backsplash. The kitchen also consisted of a tiny circular table and two chairs, one missing a leg.

Loch dragged one of the duffle bags to the back bedroom. There was no bed, but inside the duffle bag were two collapsible cots used for camping. It also contained some blow-up mattresses and think fire blankets.

“They couldn’t send us with pillows at least?” Loch complained under her breath as she pulled out the sleeping equipment and started to pitch the cots. She was relieved to see that the mattresses were at least powered by a motor to inflate, so she plugged them into the dirty, old sockets and let them inflate.

Bucky entered the bedroom carrying the second duffle bag. He threw it down on the floor next to one of the cots and began to go through it. Loch watched as he removed two AR rifles and several other weapons like handguns and knives. She tried not to watch, and kept her attention on the mattresses. Sometimes, Loch completely forgot who Bucky was at work. It’s not like she was often deployed on missions with him. She was so used to the quiet but funny introvert who liked staying home with a game of Risk, or hanging around the compound bar and having a few beers he could never get drunk off of.

Loch surveyed the makeshift sleeping area when she was finished; a stark contrast to the usual comforts of home. The room, devoid of any personal touches, emanated an air of transience that didn’t feel… like… well she couldn’t describe it exactly. It felt empty. It reminded her a lot of Bucky’s apartment.

She stole a glance at Bucky, who was meticulously arranging the arsenal of weaponry on the floor. The dichotomy between the mundane act of setting up cots and the arsenal of lethal instruments laid bare the duality of their lives. She didn’t even know how to shoot a gun. She didn’t need to. She was a walking loaded weapon herself. Her emotions like a finger on the trigger, and the safety was off.

“What’s wrong?” Bucky’s voice broke through the silence, and Lochlyn’s thoughts. She jolted a little, looking over at Bucky. He was seated on the floor, now looking at her with a puzzled gaze. She immediately put on a fake smile.

“Nothin’. Just thinking about stuff.”

“About what stuff?”

“Stuff that’s none of your business.” She said, feeling a little passive aggressive. Bucky didn’t seem to take it personally and gave her a hard stare. She knew this look. The ‘if I try hard enough, I can read your mind’ look. She clicked her tongue and sighed, rolling her eyes in an exaggerated manner.

“Knock it off. It’s not gonna work.”

He remained silent, continuing to stare her down as if all he needed was sheer determination. She groaned, pulling off her boot and throwing it across the room at him. Bucky batted it out of the way with his arm and laughed.

“I almost had it. You ruined my concentration.”

“Boy, the only thing you concentrate on is being an absolute fucking goof, mkay?” Loch quipped playfully before retrieving her boot. The super soldier held his hand over his heart with a smile.

“Oof, ouch my heart. You’re verbally abusing me. I’m gonna report you to HR when we get back.” He said sarcastically, only to be clobbered again by Lochlyn’s boot.

“Report that, hm?” she snickered and smacked him in the shoulder with the boot before balancing on her other foot to put it back on. Bucky pushed himself to his feet, brushing dust from the carpet off of his jeans. Loch managed to get her boot back on and the soldier clapped his hand on her back.

“Lunch? Before we have to meet up with Sam?”

***

Bucky and Loch enjoyed sandwiches on their walk through the city. Subway seemed to be the cheapest option, so Bucky enjoyed a cold cut with green peppers and olives, meanwhile Lochlyn chowed upon a chicken, bacon, ranch club; minus the ranch. The streets of Toronto seemed to have some kind of music playing from everywhere. Shops were crammed shoulder to shoulder like sardines in a can with outdoor displays for consumers to browse. There were a lot of eye-catching things from street food to cheap carnival plushies that you wouldn’t even think about spending three dollars, let alone ten.

Honestly, the streets could bee in hellfire and chaos, but Lochlyn was just happy to walking around with Bucky. She walked alongside him, her arm laced through his, which his hand was buried in the pocket of his thin jacket. Their shoulders bumped lightly as they walked, but neither seemed to mind.

“Aside from the fact we’re looking for a psychopath; this is a nice vacation away from the compound.” Bucky said through the last bite of his sandwich. Loch shrugged, agreeing with him. He was right, it was nice.

“Yeah, nice to get away from… well… you know.”

“Your mom?”

“Everyone. It’s not that I don’t love my mom and Happy… and the Compound is like a second home, what with Clint and his family moving in… but it just-” she sighed, trying to string together what she was feeling.

“I get it… It was the same with me when I came back from Wakanda. People are so nice, but there’s always that… look they give you. Even if you’re prim, proper and put together.”

“But you got to prove to everyone that you can help. I haven’t gotten to show everyone that I’m just as capable.”

The two of them stepped up to a cross walk curb, waiting for the signal to walk. When it changed, they stepped off the curb and onto the tarmac. Loch was staring at the ground, thinking about if she could really prove herself. She didn’t want people to look at her like she couldn’t handle herself in a fight. She knew she could never fill the shoes of her father, or even the big six, but she had to prove she was useful.

Loch didn’t have time to look up when the sound of screeching tires came hurtling towards Bucky and her. The sound of metal scratching against metal as the car was crushed upon impact. Screams and cries of the people in the general vicinity watching as debris flew in every direction. Loch saw a flash of red light as Bucky’s arms shielded her from the collision.

But it was unnecessary. The impact never hit them. In fact, when Loch and Bucky eased up and looked around, there was a perfectly circular rea with car parts littering the road. A totaled chevy was tossed to the side of the road, the entire front of the vehicle seemed to be cut off. Melted by what looked like two extremely precise lasers. A huge trench lied in the black tarmac leading to the front of the car, which was smoking.

Bucky and Loch looked around, noticing the source of the screaming was not aimed towards the nearly flaming vehicle, but rather the man levitating a few feet above the wreckage. Loch and Bucky recognized him immediately as the target. The man they were looking for. He was clad in red, black and white with a long cape billowing behind him. He looked like someone straight out of a comic book. That bright ken doll hair and unnerving blue eyes that looked down at them.

“And just when I thought I was saving two innocent civilians.” The man spoke, his voice echoing around them like it was being broadcasted in their heads. Loch only had to meet his eyes once to know he was a horrible man. The way he stared back at her. He could see into her soul. It wasn’t even a question. This guy was bad.

“Bucky…”

“Relax, Loch. Just stay back.” Bucky’s voice was firm and serious as he stepped in front of Loch defensively.

“Okay, look Clark Kent, we don’t want to fight you. Just… ground yourself so we can talk about this.” Bucky barked at him as he pulled the leather gloves off his hands, exposing the black and gold Vibranium arm he kept hidden. The man seemed disinterested in what Bucky was saying, cocking his head to the side dangerously to look past the super soldier.

“Does this mudman speak for you?” he asked, directing his question at Lochlyn, who didn’t reply. She couldn’t understand why he was even talking to her.

“No, no, don’t look at her. Look at me.” Bucky yelled again, before tearing off the sleeve of his jacket to have full range of his arm. The gold joints and groves glistened in the later afternoon light.

“First of all, show a little respect. It’s Guiding Star to you.” He scoffed with a sneer, “Secondly, you really think I’m interested in your little prosthetic after that amazing display of raw power? You’re laughable.” The man mocked the soldier, slowly floating down towards the ground where he touched down, light as a feather. Loch grabbed her phone and quickly began to dial Sam’s number, holding the phone up to her ear. Bucky still standing between her and the stranger. It rang twice before Sam’s voice picked up.

“Loch? What’s ha-”

“Sam. He’s here. And he’s mad…. We need your help. Now. Dundas and Starling.” She said quickly before hanging up. She knew Sam would find them using Redwing. Right now, she needed to focus.

“Look buddy, I don’t know what your whole… gimmick is, but that death ray thing you’re doing. You gotta stop.” Bucky spoke confidently, really showing no fear. Loch didn’t know how he could speak with the confidence of a bull. The man stood unconcerned, an unpleasant smile on his thin lips. Loch didn’t like it. He looked at Bucky like he was a bug, or a lizard, and he wanted nothing more than to step on him.

The tension in the air crackled like electricity, but Bucky remained surprisingly composed. Lochlyn, on the other hand, felt the weight of the situation sinking in as she anxiously awaited Sam's arrival. The stranger's unsettling smile only added to her unease.

Bucky, undeterred by the stranger's indifference, continued, “I don't know what comic con convention you came from, but you need to come with us. I’d really rather arrest you without the whole… yanno, punching and shooting thing.”

The man laughed, before aiming a punch directly at Bucky, who braced himself for impact. Lochlyn’s heart sank as she watched as if in slow motion, the man’s powerful fist come within a half an inch of Bucky’s face before his hand hit dead air. The shockwave of the collision sent the man backwards, flying into a parked bakery truck. The pavement cracked from where he had been standing, due to the shock.

Bucky lowered his arms, looking around before looking back to Loch, who was staring down the spot where the man had been catapulted into a truck. Her eyes crackled with a toxic looking yellow light that flickered like what could only be described as the power of a hundred nuclear bombs.

Bucky began to push her back, shaking Loch by the shoulders. She blinked a few times, looking at Bucky in shock. She had a headache that pulsated at her temples and the fear but also pride in Bucky’s eyes told her something really bad just happened.

“Lochlyn. We need to get out of here… that was amazing, but we have to go find S-”

Bucky didn’t finish as a blur powered right into him, taking him off his feet and dragged him deep through the rubble of the road. All Loch had to do was blink, and Bucky was ten feet away from her, buried deep under rock as the stranger floated above him, dusting off his hands as if he had touched something foul.

There were hardly any people around now, but the sound of police cruisers could be heard approaching from the distance. Loch looked around for anyone. She had never seen someone take Bucky down like that. So… fast.

Lochlyn felt a surge of panic as she scanned the area for any signs of help. The stranger, seemingly unbothered by the approaching sirens, turned his attention to her. He slowly walked towards her, a look of amusement and twisted curiosity in his almost too perfect face His eyes glowed with an unsettling energy, and she could feel the weight of his gaze on her. As the anxiety built up inside her, she could feel the boiling energy tingling throughout her body.

"You're quite the anomaly, aren't you?" he remarked, his voice carrying an otherworldly echo. Lochlyn clenched her fists, readying herself for whatever might come next. He cocked his head again, and Loch saw it once more. That arrogant, pompous glint. He thought he was better. She could see it in him. He thought he was a God.

Before the stranger could make another move, a burst of wings announced the arrival of Sam, soaring down with Redwing by his side. He circled over the roof tops for a second before landing down with a puff of dust between them. Lochlyn's relief was palpable, but the stranger seemed unfazed, and that worried her. A super soldier couldn’t handle him… what if Sam couldn’t?

"Step away from her," Sam demanded, his wingspan expanding as if to shield Lochlyn from any potential threat. He held the iconic red white and blue shield on his arm as if challenging him.

The stranger chuckled, a sound that sent shivers down Lochlyn's spine. "Ah, the Falcon. How quaint. I thought they’d send someone a little more… relevant.”

“It’s Captain America to you, asshole. Why don’t you put it in park before anyone else gets hurt?”

The man boastfully laughed, throwing the deepest disrespect in every breath.

“You’re not Captain America. Captain America is dead. You’re just the diversity hire because the real Celebrity kicked the bucket.”

The sound of rubble being pushed over with a groan as Bucky pulled himself from under a rather large piece of concrete.

“You disrespectful bastard.”

Sam's eyes blazed with fury, and Lochlyn could feel the tension in the air. The stranger's words lingered like a bitter taste, but Sam didn't let it deter him. He stepped forward, shield raised high.

“I might not be Steve Rogers, but I damn well earned this shield. And I won’t let you disrespect everything he stood for.” Sam's voice carried a weight that echoed through the desolate street.

“Blah, blah, blah. Did you rehearse that? It sounds like you rehearsed. Anyways, you little people bore me.” He sighed. Loch watched it happen at the speed of light. The man’s eyes glowed a threatening red before two blazing hot beams of pure condensed light came flying at Sam took a knee and deflected it with his shield. It didn’t pierce it, but the beam ricocheted and hit a building, smashing several windows in the process. It left a deep black scorch mark across the vibrant paint. The man repeated, each time, the impact driving Sam further back. Loch could see him struggling, the sweat beading down his face. He was laughing Maniacally as police cars began to surround the area. Police in uniform aimed their firearms at him. He stopped laughing and threw a disgusted look at the authorities before leveling his gaze across the crowd.

Loch was paralyzed as she watched the blood and gore explode. Police officers were decapitated, and sliced in half with the force of pure heat. Blood sprayed, coating her face and hair. Sam and Bucky ducted for cover, screaming for Loch to snap out of it as she watched blindly as the carnage flood the streets with blood. The sirens faded in her ears as she felt her own blood pumping through her head, beating like violent drums.

“LOCHLYN! LOCHLYN, WE NEED TO FALL BACK! LOCH!” Bucky yelled at her, dragging the agent by her wrist. Her legs moved as if on auto pilot, but she couldn’t focus. Not on what Bucky was saying. Not on the screams, or the flying hands that hit the puddles of blood with sickening splashes. She could however, hear the sound of the man’s laughter as he slaughtered the police in droves like cattle.

When the screaming faded and Loch was finally able to hear Bucky through the pounding headache and echo of the laughter stuck in her head, she felt like a brick of lead was sitting in her stomach. Covered in blood, all she could smell was metal. It made her sick. The three of them clambered down an alleyway, collapsing against the wall. Bucky looked the worse for wear, with a huge gash across his cheek that was smearing blood across is face. That was nothing compared to the amount of gore Sam and Loch were covered in. Sam was trying to wipe his goggles off, but Loch just sat. Staring at the ground, the fresh memory of what just happened playing in front of her eyes like a cinematic movie.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” Bucky was the first one of the trio to say anything. Sam was shaking his head as if trying to convince himself that the events that had just transpired… hadn’t. Loch had no words. She still couldn’t get over what she had just seen.

“Lochlyn, you good?” Sam asked, looking over to see Loch in a state of mental paralysis. She shook her head, eyes wide as she stared at her feet. Lochlyn could feel only two things in that moment as the adrenaline of fear faded from her mind. Rage and shock.

“Sam… I don’t know if I can do this…” Loch said blatantly, blinking as she looked up and stared at both men who gazed at her with surprised looks. They knew better than anyone that Loch never threw the towel in on a mission.

“I just mean… I want to…” Lochlyn broke her gaze and stared back down at her feet, clenching her fist in anger. The hatred she felt spreading through her chest like a virus… she didn’t like this, “all those cops…” she released her fists and held her head as she felt an earth rattling headache coming on.

Even when Bucky dropped himself down next to her, groaning as he leaned into the wall, she didn’t look up. He tossed his arm around her shoulders, exhauster from being dragged through concrete. Pulling her close, he sighed, but kept his silence.

“I want to rip him apart…” Lochlyn whispered, barely loud enough for even Bucky to hear over the oncoming ambulance sirens. It only made the electricity in her brain spike out of control. Flashes of bodies played in her mind, each like a bomb going off in her brain.

“I know, kid. But you know that won’t solve anything. We need to bring him in. Play by the rules.”

“Come on guys, we should report back. I’ll call for a car to come get us.” Sam spoke up, now on his feet. His once blue and white uniform now crusted with drying blood.

***

Arriving back at the post office, the S.H.I.E.L.D agents were more than accommodating and understanding. When Agent Burrows came to pick them up from the alleyway, he was horrified. Loch was dead silent the whole ride. She couldn’t stop thinking about the North Guardian or whatever he called himself… That disgusting smile and the way he carried himself. Calling Bucky a mudman as if he was subhuman.

The car engine shuddered, making a dangerous sound, and Lochlyn caught herself; exhaling to relax. She leaned into Bucky who was in the back seat with her. His arm still draped around her as if it could shield her from all the horrible things racing through her mind. It didn’t work.

When she was debriefed back at Headquarters, Loch got the sense that her fellow agents were treading very lightly upon eggshells. Instead of asking her questions right away, like Bucky and Sam, they let her shower, get dressed in clean clothes, and tried to give her something to eat. She denied it, leaving the McDonalds burger on the table. She was so grateful when it was all over. She only lost her temper once, which did startle Agent Burrows, but he brushed it off with a nervous laugh and continued.

Bucky awaited her arrival outside the debriefing room. He was now cleaned up, a heavy hoodie over a pair of grey sweats. He had both his hands full with a Styrofoam cups of piping hot coffee. As soon as they saw each other, Bucky pushed off from the wall he was leaning on.

As Loch approached Bucky, her exhaustion evident in the lines on her face. The weight of recent events seemed to have settled on her shoulders, but there was a glimmer of gratitude in her eyes as she took one of the coffee cups from him.

"Thanks," she murmured, cradling the warm cup in her hands. The aroma of the coffee wafted through the air, a welcome comfort in the midst of chaos. She felt so empty inside, which was only amplified when she felt the hot liquid boil like lava as it trickled down her throat. She walked with the super soldier, neither of them saying much. Lochlyn was oh so grateful for that. She didn’t know what she was supposed to say. Loch half hoped she could just forget, but knew that was an impossibility.

Bucky and Loch were chaperoned back to their safe house, where the two agents were dropped off on the curbside. Loch sighed, her cup of coffee now two thirds empty. She wished for more coffee. Loch really didn’t know if she could continue this mission. Her heart ached as Bucky wrapped his arm around her and began to walk the silent agent towards the house.

Once inside, that musty, old mold smell almost snapped Lochlyn out of her trance.Bucky had wandered off to the kitchen to dispose of his now empty coffee cup. She looked around, and as if she was reliving the trauma right in the living room of the dilapidated safe house, she felt the tears swelling. This whole time, she had tried to keep a stone-cold face, showing very little emotion aside from shock. It was like a crack had formed in her façade. And like a dam; one crack spread like a web and soon, the floodgates were gushing.

Loch stood in the closed doorway, sniffling pathetically. Her shoulders shook but she was unable to prevent the onslaught of tears which fell down her face.

As if called by a dog whistle that only the Winter soldier could hear, Bucky came rushing into the living room. There was a look of calm concern across his face as he hurried to Loch’s side. The lights within the safe house seemed to faintly flicker as each tear hit the carpet with a muddled ‘thup’.

“W…why did… i… come?” she croaked, her voice breaking with every syllable. “I… I’m… n-not ready… for… this.”

The soldier gripped Loch tightly to him, and she found herself crying like a pathetic child into his chest. Her eyes leaving wet stains on the sweatshirt he wore. Bucky did not care in the slightest. He gently stroked the back of her head; as she wrapped her arms tightly around his torso. He was soft, and his body gave off a comforting warmth. His heart beat was slow and soothing, but her mind continued to race.

“I…I’m sorry…” Lochlyn sniffled, pulling away from Bucky in the hopes of sparing his sweater from any more snot and tears. Bucky sighed, but didn’t let go of his embrace.

“Don’t…” Bucky said, resting his chin on the top of her head, “You didn’t do anything wrong. Don’t go apologizing for shit you didn’t do.”

This only made Lochlyn cry harder. She didn’t know what she did to deserve such patience and sympathy from Bucky. She just squeezed her eyes shut, burying her face in his sweater, inhaling a deep, shaky breath. With his cool, smooth metal fingers, Bucky gently tugged at Lochlyn’s hand, lacing their fingers together as he held her waist.

“Just breathe, I’m here… this too will pass.” He muttered to her, planting an ever so delicate kiss to her temple. The ache in Loch’s chest slowly dulled, but did not go away.

Bucky continued to hold her, providing a sense of solace in the midst of the storm raging inside her. The rhythmic sound of his heartbeat against her ear started to synchronize with her breathing. Lochlyn clung to the warmth of his touch, feeling the reassurance that she wasn't alone in this darkness. They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, an unspoken understanding passing between them. Bucky knew he couldn't erase the pain, but he could be a steady anchor in the turbulence. After a while, Loch dreaded letting go.

#bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes #old fanfiction #rewrite #short story #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #tear jerker #sad #original character

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marvelouslizzie · 8 months

Text

Not Lonely Anymore

summary: You hear your roommate Bucky Barnes moan your name while masturbating and it changes everything between you two.

pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

word count: 3K

warnings: 18+, dry jumping (brief), unprotected sex, daddy kink, metal arm kink, choking, teasing, dirty talk, no mention of y/n.

A/N: Hello hello! I present you the last part of my Lonely Night series. I am so grateful for your interest in the first two parts. I tried to keep my motivation up and give these two perverts a satisfying ending. I hope you will enjoy it as much as I did. Your feedback would be much appreciated.

You don't have to read the first two parts to understand what's going on but if you want to, please check my blog/masterlist for A Lonely Night and Same Lonely Night.

Thank you so much @notafunkiller for beta-reading and editing. Daddy kink and choking is for you ✌️

All work is mine, please do not repost or translate without my permission.

Read more tag starts after the second paragraph of the story.

You can’t take your eyes off Bucky while you're processing what has just happened. Your eyes roam around his face and bare chest before falling on his shorts. His erection is pressed against the waistband, carefully hidden away from you but the wetness forming on the fabric betrays Bucky’s intentions. You can’t contain your smile, but Bucky doesn’t see it. He’s too lost in his own thoughts, and when your eyes meet, you realize he is worried and embarrassed. He opens his mouth, wanting to say something in order to end this awkward silence, but you beat him to it.

“Did you just say my name?” It comes out so calm, you even surprise yourself.

You know he did. You heard it with your own ears loud and clear. That’s why you dropped your glass after all. But it was that shocking to you. That unbelievable! So you just want him to confirm it. To make it real and assure you that really happened. Maybe then you will be able to believe it.

“I- I can explain.” You notice the cold sweat forming on his forehead.

He seems like a scared kid who got caught doing something he shouldn’t do. And it’s probably because he thinks he might lose you. You would feel the same way if he was the one who caught you masturbating just an hour ago. God, that would be mortifying, but now that you are on the other side of the equation, all you feel is excitement.

The realization eventually sinks in: he wants you. He actually wants you. That gives you a level of confidence you never had before.

You take a step forward and close the distance. Your lips are on his before he can react. You wanted to do this for a long time, but you had been unsure if he would have wanted it or not. You have a clear answer now, so there’s no need to hold yourself back. It takes him a second to respond to you, but you don’t hesitate. You just keep kissing him and it wakes him up like he has been hibernating for a long time.

His hands wrap around your torso and he pulls you closer. His fingers are digging into your hips like he’s trying to convince himself this is real, and he tilts his head just enough to deepen the kiss. His tongue gently slides into your mouth and that makes you moan for the first time. His lips, his tongue… He tastes so sweet. You just can’t get enough of it. It makes you crave him even more, and you don’t know how that is even possible.

Suddenly you push him, hoping to get him back inside his bedroom, but he doesn’t move an inch. He just gives you a dazed look, trying to understand why you did that.

“Work with me. Just move back.” You sound impatient, and he finally understands what you are trying to do.

“Fine.” He raises both of his hands like he’s surrendering, with a smile on his face, then he takes a step back and lets you push him further inside the room. You continue until the back of his knees hits the bed and he falls onto it after one final push.

“Is that what you wanted?” He sounds amused.

“Yeah.” You straddle him without missing a beat, getting comfortable on his lap while he pulls you in for another kiss.

This time it feels a little different. His hands are on your cheeks, holding you still while his tongue explores your mouth. It is the most passionate kiss you have ever had in your life. His erection is standing right there, between your legs and you can’t help yourself… You can’t stop that urge that’s slowly building up and why would you? You’re on his lap, finally doing this. There’s no need to stop yourself from doing what you want. So while he tastes you however he wants, you start to move your hips. After a couple of tries, you find the perfect spot and both of you moan nearly at the same.

He stops kissing you for a second just to take a breath, but he still holds your cheeks with his big hands and looks into your eyes. It’s like he’s afraid you might disappear. You have no plans of disappearing or stopping, though. You keep moving your hips and watching his eyes flutter every time you rub the right spot. It feels good even with the fabric between you two. Yet it’s not enough.

“We should get rid of your shorts.”

“And your panties.”

You raise yourself on your knees, just enough for him to push his shorts down, but you don't give him enough space to take them off completely.

“I don’t wanna use any protection. Do we have to?”

“Well, we don’t have to, but we might need to.” He’s not sure how fertile he is. It’s not like he tried it before, so it’s quite risky. All he knows is he has a lot more come than an average man and that’s a problem when it comes to using condoms. They are practically useless.

“I’m on the pill.” You quickly clarify. You only asked the question to see if he was comfortable with the idea or not.

“Then we definitely don’t need to.” Oh, he’s definitely comfortable. The way he just said it is enough.

He grabs his cock while you pull your panties aside without wasting any time, and you lower yourself onto him while balancing yourself with one arm on his shoulder.

“That impatient?” He taunts you, but he chokes on his words as soon as he feels your wetness. The head of his cock rests between your folds while you answer him:

“Are you not?” You sound relatively normal. Then you keep talking while taking him inch by inch. “Would you rather fuck your fist and fantasize about me?”

He wants to answer you. He wants to say something, but being balls deep inside you makes it harder to do so. He just lets out a low groan while grabbing your ass to ground himself.

You’re not so different from him. The way he stretches you pulls a pornographic moan out of you. You sit still for a second, trying to get used to this feeling. You can’t remember the last time you felt this full. It makes you shiver even without moving. You take your time and he just waits, patiently until you get used to the sensation. After a couple of seconds, you feel confident enough to move.

“Ready?”

“Yes.” There’s a bit of hesitation in his voice, but you don’t notice it because you are lost in the feeling of finally being so full. All of your senses are overwhelmed by it.

You aren’t sure if it’s going to hurt because he’s definitely the biggest you have ever had. So you move your hips slowly and test the waters. There’s something there. Some kind of discomfort. You can’t say you feel uncomfortable, you just need to get used to his size. So you keep moving because there’s this promise of pleasure hidden behind that discomfort. You can nearly taste it and it keeps you going. While trying to figure out the best way to move, you don’t realize Bucky is watching you, carefully. He’s trying to read your expression and see if you are okay. He’s ready to take up the reins or just stop if that’s what you need. His hands gently roam your body, discovering little details about your skin. Like how many moles you actually have.

“No rush. Take your time.” He sounds more like himself, much more confident than before.

You moan because of his words. His voice is deeper and it makes your blood rush. You start to move a little faster and notice how the discomfort slowly fades away. He notices that, too while grabbing your tits with both of his hands. One is colder than the other, and the contrast is dizzying. You lean into him, just to feel him a little bit more, and his grip on your tits tightens.

“God, so fucking pretty!”

Before you can say anything, his mouth is on your right nipple. You feel his tongue flicking over and over again while his other hand rests on the other breast. Then he sucks your nipple into his mouth, letting his teeth graze over it. You grunt because of the mixed sensations. Just when you are about to protest, he lets out your nipple and moves on to the other one. He gives it the same treatment. A mix of licking, sucking, and biting until you can’t contain your movements. Your hips start to move so much faster, making both of you moan loudly.

“God, I wanted to do this for ages!” The words spill out from your lips without much of a thought.

“You did?” He doesn’t miss a beat.

“Yeah.” There’s no point in hiding it anymore, is there?

“Does this mean I am the daddy?”

His question catches you off guard, and you just freeze in the middle of the action.

“You… heard me.” It comes out more like a question rather than a statement.

“Why do you think I was masturbating?”

It takes you a couple of seconds to process what he's just said. He actually heard you. You never used his name, but it doesn’t change the fact that he witnessed something so private. Something you really wanted to hide from him, yet the idea of him hearing you also sets you on fire. Instead of submitting to the urge to get all shy, you decide to ask him what you actually want to know.

“You heard me and instead of making a move, you decided to fuck your fist?”

“What was I supposed to do? Knock on your door and ask if I can replace your dildo?”

“Yeah. Sounds great to me.” You keep moving your hips fast while talking. “Or maybe you are too shy to take what you really want.”

“Shy?” He blinks a couple of times.

“You don’t seem shy but maybe you are. Maybe you are a submissive little boy who wants to just lay here and take whatever I give you.”

You watch his expression change into something so different. It’s not particularly dark, but it feels like it. Before you can say anything else, he just flips you over. Your mouth falls open when your back touches the bed. Instinctively, you try to wrap your legs around his torso, but he doesn’t let you. Instead, he pushes your knees back to your chest.

“What are you doing?” Your amazement is evident in your voice.

“Taking what I really want.” It takes a lot of effort to hide your smile. You can’t believe your taunting worked that quickly. “Tell me if it gets too much and I will stop.”

“Oh, I doubt that.”

He waits for you to finish talking and then he starts to move. Your mouth falls open once again but this time, it’s not because you are surprised. It’s because you can’t believe how good it feels. It’s completely different than how it felt when you were on his lap. He reaches deeper inside you in this position, and his hands are still on your legs, pushing you further into the bed. You let out another sinful moan.

“Way better than I imagined.”

“Is it?” A smile lingers on his lips. “Feel free to be as loud as you want.”

“Do you want us to get kicked out of this apartment?” It takes every ounce of strength in you to form this sentence without stuttering. It’s so hard to talk like you aren’t getting railed.

“No, I just wanna hear you call me daddy.”

You can’t help but moan. Shit, he really heard everything. You feel so exposed, but somehow it doesn’t bother you. Is he actually into this? Who could’ve guessed?

“If you want that, you gotta work harder than this.”

“Ask for it.”

“Harder, please.” He waits for daddy to come out of your mouth, but it doesn’t. You really meant what you just said, he needs to earn it.

So that’s exactly what he does. He starts to pound you, just the way you fantasized. He manages to touch every part inside you and fills up in a way that makes you wanna cry. Your moans get louder with each thrust.

“Oh fuck! Oh fuck!” Your ears start to buzz. You can feel that your orgasm is close.

“Talk to me, doll.”

He wants to hear you, and you don’t feel like holding back anymore.

“I’m-I’m so close, Bucky.”

“What do you need?” His question is instant. You feel that he’s ready to do whatever you want.

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.” You take a deep breath just to be able to keep talking. “Just keep going. Please…” Your voice comes out so pathetic, but you can’t brush off the urge to beg him. He would like that, wouldn’t he? You did it while masturbating and he got a hard-on just because of you. “Please, please, please.”

Your words make him groan like he is struggling to contain his excitement.

“I really need it, daddy, please…”

“Fuck, baby.” You feel him losing control. His thrusts are sloppier but he notices that, too. His metal arm moves on your chest and rests there. You don’t know if he’s trying to keep you still or ground himself. Then he looks directly into your eyes, trying to see if that makes you uncomfortable or not. It definitely doesn’t. Quite the opposite, you need his hand on your neck, and you gently grab his metal hand and move it on your neck without breaking eye contact. You watch his eyes widen with the realization.

“Are you sure?” You nod in response, but it’s not good enough for him. “Words, baby. I need actual words.”

“Please.”

That does it. His fingers tighten around your neck, pressing right against your veins, careful not to crush your windpipe.

“Yess.” Your head is thrown back. This is exactly what you wanted.

The way he’s choking you snaps something inside you. It intensifies everything you are feeling at that moment. Your whole body suddenly starts to shake, and it surprises you. You have never reached an orgasm this quickly before.

“Yes, yes, yes. Oh god, yes!” Your voice comes out hoarser than usual.

“Look at you.” He taps his fingers on your neck while he keeps moving. “My pretty baby. So good for me.”

You only moan in response, already too lost in the waves of your orgasm. It’s running through your whole body like electricity.

“Look at me! Look into my eyes.” He sounds so commanding and you listen to him even though it’s so hard to do it. He looks like he’s about to lose it, too.

“Come with me. P-please.”

“You want me to come, baby?” He asks in a way that makes you wanna cry out even more. Like he won’t come if that’s what you want. He will keep holding back until you say so but you don’t want that. You want him to enjoy this as much as you do.

“Please, daddy. Come with me.” He groans in response. You clearly see how your words affect him, especially calling him daddy. You can’t believe how much he’s into it.

He stops holding back and starts to move in a way that makes you scream. So you do that. You can’t contain the noises you make when he moves like this. You grip on his sheets, letting him ruin you for any other man.

“Fuck! Such pretty sounds… You like it that much, baby?”

“Yes, yes. So good, daddy.” You slur at the last part. You don’t care. You don’t care about anything when he makes you feel like this.

“Fuck, you take me so well.” You can actually hear that he’s close. “I-I’m gonna come, oh fuck.”

“Yess!” You have been waiting for this. You want it so badly. You wanna see him come. You want him to feel good, all because of you. You want to witness a part of him that he hides away from everyone else. It feels like owning a part of him. So private and primitive, but you don’t care. You need this.

He lets out the most guttural moan right before starting to come inside you. He doesn’t stop, just keeps the same pace, emptying himself inside you.

“Take it, baby. Take it! It’s all yours.” You know what he’s talking about. His come is already dripping out, yet he’s not done coming.

It looks like he lost his damn mind, but it’s the hottest thing you have ever witnessed in your life. You are so fascinated by him even though you are still coming yourself. That's why you force yourself to keep your eyes open and watch him while your high slowly fades away. Yet he keeps going. His hands are gripping on your tights, pulling you into him every time he moves. His come is dripping on your ass, to the sheets. It’s so messy but feels out of this world.

After a couple more thrusts, he collapses on top of you. His head rests on the crook of your neck, and you feel his heavy breathing on your skin. You don’t mind it, though. He doesn’t let his whole weight crush you. Always so thoughtful….

Your hands go to his hair, gently stroking it. That makes him move his head and look at you.

“We should’ve done this before.” That makes you wanna laugh, but instead, you just give him a huge smile.

“Yes, we should have. It was amazing.”

Suddenly he moves away from you, leaving you completely empty. It makes you whine instantly. You miss the fullness and the warmth of his cock already.

“Where are you going?” You give him a confused look while raising yourself on the bed. “Come back here.”

“Not was.” He kneels right next to the bed, in between your legs, and moves his head closer to your dripping core. “I’m not done with you, baby.”

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cryinq-boutstuff · 1 year

Text

IMAGINE

Warnings: !! no warnings just be ready for so much fluff !!

You share a room with e/n for collage, you sat on his bed while watching tiktok. Then you felt your eyes start to droop. You fell asleep on his bed, while he was out with his friends.

You heard the door slowly open. Then shut, you kept your eyes shut even though you were wide awake.

“she's asleep so be quiet” you heard e/n whisper as he sits down next to your body and stroke your hair

“Bro you need to tell her how you actually feel” one of his friend whisper whilst smoking a cigarette

“Dude she hates me, she'll never feel the same” he whispers back in response and leaving you be.

After a while all his friends had left and it was just you and e/n alone... He finished his shower and got in bed beside you pulling you into his chest

You listen to his heartbeat and snuggle closer to him he giggles and you both fall asleep in each other's arms...

____________________________________

a/n

Now read the title again...

Anyways this was really fun to make so hope you guys like it!!

#just imagine #enemys to lovers #short story #avatar 2 #avatar the way of water #neteyam #city life #artists on tumblr #drawing #bucky barnes #fanart #eddie munson #indie

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nickfowlerrr · 7 months

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Bucky Barnes and you get stuck in elevator for one hour. What are you two doing? 🖤 honest answers only even if they are filthy 🔥

stuck with you

pairing: bucky barnes x curvy!reader

words: 2.4k

warnings: 18+ only. smut. angst. all the feelings. unprotected sex. hint of a breeding kink. some spanking. oh some very incorrect description of an anxiety attack and how to help someone through it. i know, i know, but it's for the story lmao. uhm if i'm missing something that should be tagged pls lmk!

notes: i couldn't not write something for this and it was gonna be so smutty and then i started and then i... i dont know what happened lol. but thank you for sending this in, i know it's not a direct answer but i hope you like it <3 thank you in advance for reading and as always, comments and reblogs are always welcome and so appreciated!

"What exactly do you think slamming all the buttons will do?" he asked as he leaned against the wall of the elevator, nothing short of casual amusement lacing his voice as he watched you.

You ignored him, trying the emergency call button for the fifth time in the minute that had passed since the elevator stopped moving.

You didn't realize the change in your breathing until Bucky's hand came to rest on your arm. You flinched at his touch, having been too lost in your growing panic to notice he'd gotten closer.

"What?" you asked through a heavy, annoyed breath.

"You need to breathe, sweetheart," he instructed gently, tugging you to face him fully, pulling you away from the buttons as he did.

"I'm breathing," you snapped at him, forcing yourself to take a breath as you worked to steel your nerves. It was all in vain, though. You couldn't fight off the paranoid thoughts as they were coming through your mind too fast to even try and rationalize. "I just," you said shakily, "I ca- I can't,"

You suddenly found yourself nearly bowing over as you tried to catch a breath. Bucky helped you to sit while he kept his hold on you, his intent eyes set on you as your own squeezed shut, your hands mindlessly gripping his forearms as you tried to ground yourself.

"Look at me, sweetheart," he ordered firmly, though he waited patiently for you to follow his instructions.

You felt like you couldn't catch your breath, each one you took was too shallow and you couldn't manage to breathe in any deeper.

"Just hold your breath for a second, doll,"

You were still struggling, and the last thought on your mind was to stop breathing altogether, you were sure you'd pass out if you did. Your gasping was only growing worse as Bucky contemplated his options.

He didn't think long before he gently took your face in his hands and forced you to look at him, your eyes glassy and lips parted, desperate for air. had his heart clenching. He didn't want to see you like that, not with that fear in your eyes. He leaned into you and pressed his lips to yours, more fervently than he even meant to.

You were still against him for a moment, not moving as he pulled you closer to him. It took you a second to register what was happening. All at once, though, your mind caught up, your heart pounding in your chest only growing wilder as you let your eyes close, crawling into Bucky's lap as he held you gently, his lips still against yours. You were all together intoxicated by him, his soft but secure touch, the taste of mint and coffee on his lips, the scent of his cologne mixed with his shampoo from your shared shower earlier, it wrapped around you as your previous thoughts of peril faded into the background.

All that you could think of was him, here and now. And you in his solid lap, his thick arms wrapped around you, his hands holding your face so delicately. Your lips began to work with his as you breathed him in and let him taste you in kind.

You soon lost yourself to him completely; and then, after another long minute, you realized you once again couldn't breathe.

You broke the kiss, hungry for air just slightly more than you were for him. You let your face fall as your noses brushed and you finally were able to catch your breath.

"Huh," you huffed, suddenly remembering yourself. You peeked up at him through your lashes meekly before you murmured a soft thank you.

He smirked halfheartedly, but a little bit of sadness he couldn't hide was apparent on his face as you then moved to get off of him, not that you noticed. Your thoughts were once again getting caught in a spiral.

As you tried to move off his lap, you were stopped. Bucky held you down, his large hands gently squeezing into your soft waist, keeping you exactly where you were.

"I get you're still mad at me, sweetheart, but I'm not just gonna sit here and watch you spiral again," he said as he pulled you into him.

You slumped into his chest, letting your heaviness rest on him as you nuzzled your face into his neck.

"I'm not mad at you," you mumbled into his skin.

"Could've fooled me," he breathed a humorless laugh.

You sighed, pulling away from him slightly.

"I'm not mad. I'm just-" you cut yourself off before forcing your tongue to continue, "I'm scared."

Your eyes were glued to his chest as you spoke but the moment the admission slipped past your lips, Bucky was tilting your chin up to look you in the eyes.

"Sweetheart," he began.

"Not of you. Of me. I just... I'm not, I'm not used to this. To being loved, the way you love me. And I don't wanna lose that," you whispered as tears pricked your eyes. "I don't want you to end up feeling stuck with me. Because I'm a lot, Bucky. And I'm not easy to live with. I'm particular and I need alone time a lot of the time... and ... You just have no idea what you're inviting into your life."

"You," he said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, his touch grazing your cheek as he wiped a tear from your skin. "I'm inviting you. I love you. I want you. All of it with you. Every last bit, doll."

You could see the sincerity in his eyes as he spoke and it only made you all the more worried.

"I'm not trying to pressure you, sweetheart. If you don't want to move in with me, you don't have to. If you need time, I'll wait. However long I have to," he said as his hands began to run up and down your back soothingly.

"I want to, Bucky. I do. I just don't want you to regret this."

"When are you gonna see it," he breathed as he squeezed you closer, looking up at you as he leaned back against the wall behind him.

"See what?"

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I could never regret you."

"You say that-"

"Ever."

Your eyes softened at his insistence, and deep down, you knew he meant it.

Your avoidance of an answer to his question this morning had been you trying to protect not only yourself, but him from disappointment, though it was becoming clearer and clearer that it was only hurting you both.

You were scared, but you also wanted this just as badly as he did. God, how long you'd dreamed about the day you'd wake up in Bucky's bed and not have to rush to your own apartment to get ready for work. How nice it'd be to get home from a miserable day and have him there to make things better without having to endure the twenty minute commute from his place to yours. To share a place together, your and his...

You were near burrowing yourself in his embrace, his hands still soothing up and down your back as he held you close, when you reached to grab one of his hands in yours.

You pulled away from him enough to look him in the eye.

"If you're sure,"

"I'm sure,"

"And if you ever wanna go back on it, or change your mind, I -"

"I wouldn't,"

"But if you do-"

"I won't."

There was a moment, a silent conversation between you two as you look into each other's eyes. You pressed your forehead to his, kissing him delicately before you pulled back again.

You nodded, "I'd love to move in with you, Bucky," you said with a small smile playing on your lips. Your heart soared as you watched the dopey smile that stretched onto Bucky's face before he crushed you against him. "That's all I needed to hear," he said in between kissing you everywhere he could in the position you were in. You laughed as you wiggled to sit up higher on his lap, looking down at him.

You reached a hand to brush through his hair, and as you did the elevator jolted. You caught yourself with a hand against the wall as Bucky tightened his arms around you instinctively.

You felt his warm breath against the swell of your breasts before you looked down with a raised brow. His face was right against your chest, and his eyes were now locked on your breasts as they hung in front of him, his hands grabbing at your ass while his eyes grew darker, filled with even more excitement.

"Wouldn't mind if that happened again," he said huskily.

"Odds are in your favor, you know this complex is the fucking worst," you huffed.

"All the more reason for you to move in with me," he smirked. "But ya know one good thing about these old buildings?"

"Hm?"

"They don't have cameras in the elevators," he said, smacking your ass and causing you to gasp and jolt from the strike.

He was mesmerized by the sight as he repeated his actions over and over again until you were whining and pressing your chest into his face.

"Buck," you mewled pathetically, the tingling between your thighs growing more unbearably with every slap against your ass. Each hit only getting you more wet for him.

You were seconds away from ripping your tank top off yourself but Bucky quickly pulled it off and over your head for you before his lips descended upon your breasts.

You let your head drop back in time with your hips pressing to sit fully in his lap, a moan escaping you when you felt his hard length against you. Your hands were in his hair as his hands squeezed your ample flesh, his lips fervent against your skin still.

You couldn't help yourself as you began tilting your hips over his, back and forth, your movements more urgent the more you felt him twitch beneath you.

Your bra had been tossed to the side minutes ago but you were still in your leggings while Bucky was still fully clothed.

When you tilted your hips just right, you felt his cock rub against your clothed clit and you nearly lost it completely; shoving yourself off of him to finally rid yourself of the clothing that kept you from what you really wanted. Bucky followed your lead without having to be told and got undressed in the blink of an eye. You saw his throbbing length standing erect for you and nearly salivated at the sight, your mouth parted in awe at his beauty. You swear, you'd never get over it. Every little thing about him, from his scars to his own stretch marks, every bit of his was beautiful. And you smiled as you saw him admiring you the very same way, that wonderstruck look in his eyes you'd never get used to. Your patience was wearing down the longer you took, though, and quickly, you climbed back down into his lap before lining his cock up to your slick entrance.

You slowly sank down on him, moans from both of you filling the elevator at the sensation.

"Oh, fuck, doll," he moaned while groping your hips. You started moving up and down his length, slowly as you enjoyed the stretch of him inside of you, wanting to feel each and every inch of his thick cock as it filled you up.

"Mmm," you hummed a mindless moan, throwing your head back in pleasure as Bucky took a pert nipple into his mouth, squeezing and kneading your breast in his big hand. "Feels good, Buck," you breathed, slamming your hips down on his cock, earning a deep throated growl from him.

Suddenly his hands were back on your wide set hips, his fingers digging into the plushy flesh there as he began fucking up into you himself. You were helpless as you keened at the feeling, gripping his shoulders to keep yourself upright. "Oh god, Bucky, please," you whined, pushing your hips back down to meet his thrusts, "please, please, please,"

"You close, sweetheart?" he panted. "I can feel you gripping my cock, baby, fuck," his eyes squeezed tight as he nearly snarled the curse of pleasure.

"Gonna fuckin' fill you up and then you're really gonna be stuck with me,"

"Bucky," you gasped, though it came out with a moan.

"That's it, sweetheart, take my fucking cock, just like that, doll. Just like that," he punctuated each word with another snap of his hips into yours, rolling into you and rubbing your clit deliciously with his every move.

You were both panting, a sheen of sweat on both of you as he fucked you perfectly, the only other sounds to be heard were of your twin moans and the slapping sounds of skin on skin, the salacious squelching of his dick drilling into you over and over.

His thumb found your clit and drew tight circles over the sensitive bud as he felt your walls tightening around him, wanting to keep him inside of you. It was almost blinding, the way you were hit with your orgasm. Your muscles tightened as Bucky continued to fuck you through the high, unintelligible moans and whimpers of his name and cries intermingled as the waves of pleasure crashed over you over and over again.

You found yourself on your back in the blink of an eye as Bucky continued to pummel into your tight heat, deep strokes along your velvety walls as he chased his own high, holding himself above you as he did.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, I'm gonna come, baby, I-" his words turned into a deep groan as his pace faltered, soon morphing into heady moans when you felt his warm spurts filling you up as he came inside of you.

His thrusts slowed as did your breathing until he slowly pulled out of you, laying himself down next to you and pulling you into him. He kissed your forehead as you melted into his embrace.

"I mean it, ya know. You're the one who's gonna be stuck with me, sweetheart. I'm not goin' anywhere," he promised with a simper. "Not without you."

#bucky barnes x curvy!reader #bucky barnes x plus size reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes drabble #asks #anon #thank you for the inspo!! <3 #bucky x curvy!reader #bucky x plus size reader #bucky x reader

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buckyalpine · 9 months

Text

As requested, just a little back story for how you and Bucky got together after this fic (Steve cheating on you with Sharon). You could read this as a standalone. Turns out the backstory is longer than the OG fic but I hope you like it! <3

Warnings: Cheating, angst, smut, flufff, comforting, protective Bucky falling in love with you

"It's-it's not what it looks like"

It was pathetic even for him.

What else could it possibly look like.

Steve scrambled up to cover himself as if he wasn't balls deep in someone else while Sharon squeaked, pulling the sheets over herself. You didn't move from where you were standing, still blinking at the flushed captain while he struggled to pull his boxers on, nearly tripping as he ran over to you.

"Sweets, it's not-

"Please don't" You whispered shaking your head, tears you didn't notice streaming down your face, still looking at Sharon's fucked out form, the deep blush on her cheeks and messy hair enough to let you know they had already been at it for a while.

"Let me explain-Wait, y/n!!"

You walked as fast as you could in desperate need of air, hoping you wouldn't run into anyone as you dashed down the hall, your eyes trained on the floor. You nearly bit through your lip, throat closing in on itself painfully tight, not noticing Bucky as you dashed by.

"Y/n?" Bucky was on his way for a run when he saw you leave Steve's room, surprised to hear a sniffle as you ran off with your head down. It wasn't his business to pry into the relationship but seeing you upset made him worry, now also concerned for his best friend.

He made his way over to Steve's room instead of chasing after you, his blood turning ice cold finding a half dressed Sharon along with Steve still in nothing but his briefs.

"What the hell"

"I-" Steve froze, stuttering when Bucky's eyes flicked between him and the other blonde with disgust, stepping outside again till they were both fully dressed.

"What the fuck Steve" Bucky's fists were balled at his sides trying not punch his best friend square in the face, giving him a chance to explain himself first. Not that it mattered.

"It wasn't supposed to happen"

"Which part, you cheating or y/n finding out" Bucky stared at the Captain while he sat down on the edge of his bed in defeat.

"Relax, Barnes, it's not like she was your girl-

"You shut the fuck up" Bucky growled when Sharon tried to speak up, pinching the bridge of his nose in an attempt to collect himself.

"Leave. Just leave" Steve turned to her, ignoring the annoyed huffs she made as she collected her things, slamming the door shut behind her.

"It was just the one time. We never did anything else before th-this" Steve's voice cracked on the last word before breaking into a sob, running his hands through his hair while Bucky made his way over to sit beside him.

"Is that supposed to change anything punk?" Bucky shook his head in disappointment, now worried for you instead. "Why would you do that to her"

Silence followed Bucky's question while Steve wracked his brain for the answer.

Why.

Why the fuck would he do that.

You were nothing short of perfect for him. Beautiful on the inside and out. When Steve first met you, he had the same feeling in his stomach as the day he'd met Peggy. His heart started to beat a little bit faster. Cheeks a bit warmer. He mustered up all the courage he could to ask you out on a date and the second you said yes, it became the happiest day of his life. He felt so strongly for you, it almost hurt.

However along with his passion came an equal amount impulsiveness and carelessness. It showed during brave, heroic acts where he threw himself out of buildings or on top of grenades. Now it was showing during his less gracious moments where he gave into a moment of temptation, not thinking about anything else when he took the blonde to his room, falling for the batting of her lashes and soft touches.

"It was just the one time sweets, I promise. I've never done anything else"

Steve's desperate voice made your heart hurt, his red rimmed eyes and puffy face were full of regret. You chewed your lip to keep it from quivering, the both of you sitting on the edge of your bed.

"What was the reason?"

"I-I don't have one" His head was hung in shame, unable to meet your eyes while he fidgeted with his hands. No answer would dignify what he did and you certainly deserved better than any pathetic excuse he'd come up with. He couldn't hold himself back when he heard you sniffle, pulling you into his lap and cradling your head to his chest, hugging you tightly as you shook in his arms.

"I'm so sorry sweets, I'm so sorry" His voice cracked again, tears dampening your hair as he cried with you, rocking you gently, "I know you deserve better, I shouldn't have- m'so sorry baby"

You sobs died down to sniffles, eventually calming down to shaky breaths, the room falling silent again. The wounds were too fresh, exhaustion taking over stronger with all your emotions in turmoil. The scent that always brought you comfort and love now stung when you inhaled, still hiding away in the crook of his neck.

Old habits die hard and you found yourself falling asleep moments later, still tucked in his arms while he continued to whisper apologies, begging for forgiveness, hoping for one more chance he knew he didn't deserve.

"Can you give me another chance? Just one" Steve whispered when your eyes cracked open, your body till drained and head throbbing. "Just one darling, you don't have to tell me right now, I just- "

"I'll think about it"

Steve nodded, leaving your room to give you some space while you thought it over. You tried to take a hot bath to ease the heartache but it did nothing. You hated how quickly you had melted into him the second he comforted you. You hated how much you wanted to forgive him easily because you loved him so much. He had just slept with someone else and you went and fell asleep in his arms.

Pathetic.

You eventually made your way downstairs for a snack, unable to fall asleep, embarrassment crawling up your cheeks when you saw Bucky nursing a cup of coffee, seeing your disheveled form. Before you could do or say anything, he pulled out a chair for you, having you sit down and pecking the tiniest kiss on top of your head.

"I'll make it for you" Bucky smiled, pulling out your favorite mug with kittens on it and putting the kettle on. He knew your go to was chamomile tea during late nights, grabbing a box of chocolate chip cookies to snack on.

"He wants another chance" you mumbled between sips, "and it's pathetic that I'm considering it"

"That's not true y/n" Bucky sighed, giving your hand a comforting squeeze, the cool metal easing your nerves. "It's not pathetic. You really loved him, that doesn't just disappear over night"

"I'm supposed to be stronger than this" You shrugged but Bucky wasn't having any of it, scooting closer to you.

"You are strong. Its hard because you loved him. And you still do"

"I wasn't good enough, was I" If it wasn't for his super hearing Bucky would've missed the whisper of your voice, his eyes growing wide at what you said.

"Don't. Doll, in the most respectful way possible, you're beautiful. On the inside and out. Anyone can see it. I don't feel comfortable around others the way I do with you. You're one of the wonderful people I've ever met and I've been alive for 103 years. The prettiest doll too. If you were mine-"

Bucky blinked as soon as the words left his mouth, no. There is no if you were mine Barnes, that's the girl your best friend loves-

"Sorry" He caught himself, cutting himself off, not wanting to overstep, "What I'm saying is you were not the problem here. Not in the slightest. There's no way the sweetest angel I've ever met is not good enough"

"Well, I was clearly lacking something, there's just me and he's the great Captain America" You scoffed.

"To the world" Bucky nodded, shaking his head thinking about the person that he knew from all those years ago. Steve Rogers, a skinny kid who got beat up in back alley ways. "But he's also that punk from Brooklyn who got all excited when some blonde kissed him for his bravery while also being in love with Peggy Carter. Melted into her arms and then tailed after Peggy like a kicked puppy seconds later when he realized he fucked up. He's not always the brightest bulb in the box even if he is the bravest. Sometimes"

"I don't know what to do"

"You don't have to know right now" Was all Bucky said, not wanting to persuade you to do anything when you were already struggling emotionally. He made you another cup of tea before walking you to your room and giving you a tight hug, letting you know he was always there if you wanted to talk before bidding you good night.

It had been a few weeks. You tried. You tried with all your heart to appreciate the efforts Steve made to mend the relationship but your mind would always flash to what you walked in on that day.

Their clothes on the floor.

Warm, flushed skin.

Sounds of pleasure.

Whenever he kissed your cheek, you thought of the way he probably did the same to her. You weren't ready to be intimate with him and you weren't sure you'd ever be able to again. In the mean time, you spent more and more time with Bucky. It helped having someone to talk to who also understood the person you had been in love with.

With every conversation you had with him, you started to feel confused. The fluttery feeling you used to have with Steve started to happen with Bucky instead. But maybe that was because he was the one person you knew you were able to turn to. Maybe.

But then you started hanging out with him even when you weren't sad. When it was just the two of you left back at the compound, you'd enjoy walks around the city, visiting art galleries, movie marathons and late night drives. Sometimes you'd both end up falling asleep together, waking up wrapped up in each others arms, only to pull away without saying a word once the sun rose again.

Your friendship was purely platonic is what you kept telling yourself when you found yourself trying to find nicer outfits to see Bucky, adding a touch of extra makeup and finding excuses to cancel on Steve just to relax at home with the team his bestfriend instead.

You slipped on some comfy clothes, ready to go to sleep when there was a knock at your door. You knew exactly who it was considering it was just the both of you once again, your facing feeling warm as you made your way to the door.

"Let's go for a ride?" Bucky gave you his signature cheeky smile that stuck with him from the 40's, his eyes sparkling when you took the other helmet from his hand, playfully rolling your eyes

"Alright Sergeant, let's go"

Bucky happily led you to the garage, ignoring the way his heart flipped when you wrapped your arms around his waist, tightly holding onto him when the engine roared to life. He had no reason to ask you to go on a ride with him. You were doing perfectly fine. You were trying to work things out with Steve and that alone had its issues but you were doing much better than before.

You didn't need to use him as a distraction.

You didn't need him at all.

But he was starting to feel like he needed you...

He couldn't think of you like that...

He shook those rogue thoughts away, zipping through the near empty streets, the cool wind making you shiver, snuggling closer to him. Bucky found himself placing his hand above yours often whenever he was at a stop light, neither of you saying anything every time your fingers intertwined instead. Once he parked back at the compound, neither of you said anything, letting the thick tension between you two linger as he walked you to your room.

Then he said good night.

Kissed your cheek.

Stayed rooted in place when he should've walked back to his room instead.

That night Bucky made love to you for the first time. It wasn't supposed to happen. It wasn't planned. Your underwear didn't match. He didn't have protection.

But none of that mattered.

It was different.

You knew Steve loved you and constantly told you how beautiful you were but a part of you still always felt insecure whenever you were intimate with him. Like you'd never be perfect in his eyes though he never said such a thing.

But not with Bucky.

You let his eyes roam your body, kissing every bit of your skin he could touch. You didn't doubt for a second that he found you beautiful everywhere. His hands roamed the soft skin of your tummy and you didn't tense your stomach. You kissed his shoulder where mental met flesh and he didn't flinch, feeling just as safe around you.

He was inside you and it still didn't feel close enough. You were wrapped up in each other with your arms and legs tangled together, soft moans filling the room as if you were still trying to keep what was happening a secret. It wasn't right, it should've have happened but it did and neither of you wanted to stop.

"Angel, I-I love you" He whispered, desperation and shame clouding his mind because he knew Steve was trying but you deserved so much more loving. "I know I shouldn't but I do. Fuck, I love you so much" His voice was muffled against your neck while he continued to rock his hips, hitching a knee up to push himself deeper.

"I love you too" You surprised yourself with how easily the words followed, feeling guilty from how true they were. You did love him. It wasn't in the moment. You had loved him from before. You loved him more even now.

"M'gonna treat you right princess, I promise. Swear on my life, whenever you're ready, if you'd have me" He pulled away from your neck, his wide innocent puppy eyes pleading with you to believe him, that he'd take care of you with his whole heart, "I won't break your heart precious girl"

"I'll be yours" You moaned as he moved faster, desperately chasing both of your climaxes. You clung into him tightly as he started to fill you up without a second guess. "One day, I'll be yours"

That started it. Neither of you said anything, not acknowledging what it was. After all, you were technically still Steve's girl. But it didn't stop Bucky from sneaking into your room in the middle of the night. It didn't stop you from sneakily holding his hand under the blanket during movie nights.

Maybe you were not ready to tell Steve yet but you were more certain about what real love felt like now than ever before.

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