#good night losers don’t forget to listen to the best song in the universe

[sammy-gvf]

We get along (for the most part)

Chapter One.

OC x Lee Bodecker

Warnings: None for now. Just some cursing.

Plot : The local rebel badass girl and Lee Bodecker have had run ins, lets see how it goes, shall we? 

MINORS DNI !!!!! Eventually this story will get 18+. I dont feel like getting in trouble because of you. Thanks a bunch. 

Evan Rachel Wood ( Across the Universe 2007) 

( personally in my head this is what she would look like but you can interpret her anyway you want!)

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My name is Margaret Lane, well Maggy. 22. Born May 2nd 1947.

The resident bad girl, don't worry, I gave myself that nickname.

I have lived in this tiny, middle of nowhere town my entire life. Same people, same gossip.  There's no escape. No matter how hard I try, something always stops me. I live with my parents and little brother here in Knockemstiff, Ohio. My parents and I have a mutual understanding of “you go to work and come home and then we don't talk”, which is fine with me. My little brother is the only one I can really rely on. He is 17 years old and he is really the only person in my family that I can really talk to. I mean, I have friends but they aren't living in the same house as me. Not yet at least, we are thinking about moving out all together.

High school is where I built my reputation, of course. Used to sneak around with Arvin Russell, which led me to meet Lee Bodecker. Sneaky ass sheriff used to follow my every move, making sure he took every opportunity to bust Arvin and I any chance he got. 

Had nothing better to do than to bust on teenagers who were sneaking out to their parents, what a loser. Along with gaining some parking tickets and speeding tickets along the way, we became acquaintances. Thinking about the future, I was dying to leave this town. Never got the chance to after high school, hopefully I will as soon as i'm done college. 

 I can say whole heartedly that I do NOT enjoy Lee's presence. That man memorized my license plate number. Stops me all the time, for no reason. 

Flashback 

It was a warm saturday evening, about 7pm. I had just got some college work done. Figured it was too nice to just sit inside, right?

 I get up out of my bed and put my school stuff in my bag, walking over to my closet to put on a pretty yellow flowy dress and grab my leather jacket, that'll go nice with the breeze coming in through my window.

I put my hair up in a bun and slip on some keds, something easy ya know? 

I turn off the light in my room and walk into the living room where I see my father asleep on the couch, I walk over to the counter and grab a little piece of paper and write “going out for a drive, be back soon” and put in on the table in front of my father so if he wakes up, he knows where I went. 

I actually have a lot of freedom compared to other girls my age, many girls my age are looking for husbands and/or their parents are trying to set them up with someone. My parents know who I am, I was so against having an actual boyfriend so I just slept around. Obviously, people at church got wind of it but I didn't really care, to me men are there at my disposal. I play the field for my own reasons. 

I grab my keys off the door in the foyer of my little house and head outfront. 

I head down the steps of my house and waltz towards my red little 1964 Ford Mustang. Worked for it all by myself. 

Getting in the car, I pop a cigarette in my mouth and light it up. Keeping the cigarettes in my car was my best bet, my father would kill me if he knew I smoked these things. Turning on the car, I throw in a Led Zeppelin cassette, immediately Whole Lotta Love starts playing. What a good song to drive to. 

I put my windows down and start driving down a long road where I know for a fact no one drives this time of night, partly because they are afraid of the sheriff, Lee Bodecker. 

Lee doesn't scare you, never has. 

Blaring music at high volume was what you  were known for in these parts and you could really care less about the time and how loud you had it. Music is a really important part of your self expression. 

Speeding down the road, cigarette in my mouth screaming the lyrics 

You need cooling

Baby I'm not fooling

I'm gonna send ya

Back to schooling

A-way down inside

A-honey you need it

I'm gonna give you my love

I'm gonna give you my love

 I smile and listen to the lyrics, I feel like such a rebel. People in these parts don't listen to this type of music, devil music they call it. They think it has some deep down evil meaning. I just shake it off, they wouldn't know real music if they tried. 

 I could just leave right now if I wanted to. Drive out of town and start fresh, no one would miss me. Except my brother and friends. They are really the only people keeping me in this dead end town. 

The cool breeze enters your hair and you lose your hair tie. Fuck. 

“ Damn It”  You say as you put the cigarette down and try to look to see where it went. It's nowhere in sight. 

“ I have to pull over to get this thing” you think to youtself. It's the only hair tie you own right now.

you light another cigarette and pull my car over to a slightly darker side of the road. You get out of the car and start searching for my hair band, it had to have fallen behind your seat. 

 Of course, you saw familiar blue and red lights pull up right behind me.

“Fuck me” you mutter as you turn around, shut the car door, kick the dirt under your feet and lean up against the car , patiently waiting for Lee to take his good ol time walking to me.

Lee exits his police cruiser wearing the typical uniform with the typical toothpick in his mouth.

You watch him as he slowly strides over towards you and You roll your eyes at him as he eyes you down, prick.

“Well, well, well, Ms. Lane. Fancy to see you here.” Lee says smirking and laying one hand on your car's trunk. You scoff at him.

“ Hands off the car, Bodecker. Thought you'd know better than to touch what's not yours.” You say looking over at him, taking a drag of your cigarette. Lee scoffs and walks over to you, taking the cigarette out of your mouth and crushing it with his shoe. Your jaw drops and you look over at him in disgust as he chuckles at your reaction to his doing.

“Pretty little ladies like you shouldnt be smokin these, could make ya look ugly” He says. 

You can smell the tobacco smell coming off him, the smell of mints sticking to his breath. He is a little closer to you now, you back up and grab your pack of cigarettes out of the cup holder in your car. Bending over, the sheriff gets a nice view of your backside for a split second.  

“Sheriff, I would like to respectfully say I do not give a fuck what a man thinks about how I look smoking a cigarette, I am not here for a mans enjoyment. Also, one more pet name and I'm telling your wife.” you say as you light another cigarette and the sound of Led Zeppelin is lingering in the background, Lee clicks his tongue and looks over at you.

“Ms.Lane, you have quite the mouth on you. Not very ladylike for a woman your age.” Lee takes his hat off and leans against your car. He lights a cigarette and stands there for a minute. You look at him confused and you roll your eyes. 

“Lee, besides bothering me, do you have a purpose being here right now?” You look at him and say while you take a drag of your cigarette. Lee looks over to you and laughs. 

“Well, I just seen a car parked all by itself on the side of the road and I was on duty anyways but then I saw your license plate and figured I'd see why you, little lady, are out all by yourself at this time of night.” Lee says throwing his cigarette on the dirt ground below him. 

You turn to look at him and finish your cigarette, leaning against the car still.

“ I appreciate your concern, Bodecker. I am just out for a drive and pulled over to find my hair tie, it came out while I was driving. Pulled over to look around for it, don't want my hair in my face while I am driving. Also, not a little lady. I am grown.” You say turning away from Lee and finding your hair tie, you turn to Lee while tying your hair up, smirking you say

“ Goodnight Officer,also don't follow me again, yeah?” You say climbing back into your car and you slowly pull away.

Lee stands there watching as you climb back into your car, the smell of your perfume in the air invades his lungs, dumbfounded, he smirks and laughs to himself. 

“Smart girl” Lee says as he smirks and turns to go back to his cruiser.

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You had noticed sometime down the road that there was a car following you with no lights on, you had just assumed it was some random person but with one certain lick of light you saw the sheriff's face in the mirror of your car mirror. Figuring that out, you went a little faster down the road and then you lost your hair tie, you knew what was coming. 

You look in the car mirror to look at Lee. He's already turned his car around and started driving the other way. You werent dumb, you know from the years of Lee catching you sneaking out and drinking and or having boys in your car as a young girl, he knows your moves. It makes you think he patrols these parts so he can catch you doing something dumb one day just to cuff you up and get some control. He never does. 

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 Two people with reputations in this town. 

 How bad can it get?

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Hi everyone! Welcome to my first fic! Lee Bodecker is quite the character and I have been wanting to write him for a while. Dont forget to leave some opinons so I can know what yall would want to possibly happen! Dont forget to like/reblog! It would mean the world. I am not sure about my posting schedule but itll most likely be once or twice a week! also let me know if youd like to be added to my tags so I can let you know when I post another chapter! 

Tags- @please-buckme , @ladyfallonavenger , @buckysdolls , @nerdy-depressed , @do-not-pray-for-me , @unsentlettersandmore , @local-spacegirl , @youcancallmeishita , @not-another-fangirl​ , @angelicbabydolll

#sheriff lee bodecker #lee bodecker #sebastian stan #oc x lee bodecker #tdatt fanfiction #tdatt fic #the devil all the time #fanfic #minors fuck off

[lovemesomesurveys]

Thought I Couldn't Top It, Huh? OVER 2000 Questions! (Truly the Longest!) Created by distortedcognition Part 5

x__Odd Questions__x

What color is the bottom of your tongue? Pink and whiteish. Your foot? White, like the rest of my skin. Do you have any medical problems concerning feet? No. Do you secretly fantasize about George W. Bush? Uh, no... Do you chew on your homework? No... Pencils? No, I’ve never chewed on any writing utensils or school supplies. Do you read the dictionary? No, not even when I’m super bored. Encyclopedia? When I was a kid I had some that were made for kids that I liked.

Atlas? No. Road map? No, that’s what GPS is for. 

Do you memorize random facts? Sure.

Do you stalk anyone? No.

Does anyone stalk you? Not that I know of... Do you collect dust? Not purposefully, but since I don’t dust I guess I do.... :X Lint? No. Baby teeth? No. Have you ever thought of becoming a prostitute? No. Do you use lotion on your feet? Yeah. Have you ever played a kazoo? Nope. Have you ever shot someone? Uh, no. Something? A target. How many pairs of underwear do you own? Several. Jeans? A few. What ring size are you? Like a 7 or 8. Belt size? I’m not sure, I never wear belts. Have you ever gotten anything amputated? No. Do you have a calendar from 2001 hanging in your room? No. That would be quite outdated. Do you eat a lot? I wish I could eat more so I could gain some weight. Do you get excited over cameras? No. Do you have a strange obsession with pickles? No, but I l like them. Poison? Uh, no. I’d like to avoid poison, please. Knives? No. Cheese? I love cheese. Penguins? No.

Bald people? No.

Pirates? No. Corny jokes? I am a sucker for corny and punny jokes. Are you a virgin? I am. Have you ever tied your tooth to a door to lose it? No. Do you bite yourself? No. Do you get cold sores often? No, thankfully. Those hurt so bad. Do you have a cold right now? No. Do you suffer from chronic migraines? No. Do you like to touch sharp objects? Uh, no. Do you have a twitching problem? No. What do you do on the computer? I spend most of my time on it scrolling through Tumblr, doing surveys, watching YouTube, and playing The Sims. Anything your parents should know about? Not that I can think of. Are you happy with your life? :/ Is everybody else happy with your life? Uhh, probably not. Do you like 100% white grape juice? No. How big is the universe? Bigger than you can even imagine. How many hours of sleep do you get every night? A few hours at most. What do you dream about? Random shit. Do you enjoy bungee jumping? I would never go bungee jumping. Do you have AIM? Well, not anymore since it doesn’t exist. I hadn’t used it since like 2009 anyway. MSN? No, I never had MSN. YIM? Not anymore. Is that still a thing? A Neopets account? I highly doubt my account still exists out there since I haven’t been on it since the early 2000s. I don’t even know Neopets is still around. A Vampirefreaks account? No. A Quizilla account? No. A Bzoink account? No. Do you watch bugs crawl on the floor? Ew, no. Do you follow the bugs that crawl on the floor? Absolutely not. Do you get attacked by ladybugs? NO, thankfully. Are you scared of everything that breathes? Ha, I know I’m a big scardy cat but I wouldn’t say that sheesh. Are you scared of anything at all? Yeah, a lot of things. What? A lot of things. Which cardinal direction do you like best? The one that takes me in the right direction at the time. Do you have a life? Nope.

Then why are you taking this? Because I don’t have a life. Do you have a microphone on your computer? Yeah. A webcam? Yeah. A scanner? Yes. A printer? Yes. A cordless mouse? No. I have a laptop and just use the trackpad. Does your mouse light up? -- What kind of computer do you have? A MacBook Air. Were you ever physically abused? No. Verbally? No. Sexually? No. Do you wish you were a fish? Nah, I’m good. A cat? No. A dog? No. Do you have a cell phone? I do. What kind is it? It’s an iPhone 12 Pro Max. Do your teachers like you? My teachers always loved me. Do your parents like you? My parents love me. Do your siblings like you? Yes. Does karma, if it exists, love you? I don’t believe in karma. Did you have a tail when you were born? No. Do you enjoy school? I enjoyed parts of it.  Are you a packrat? I do have a hard time getting rid of stuff. Do you know HTML or CSS? I know some very basic HTML. Do you find yourself chewing on anything your fingers have touched? My food? Do you shy away from social situations? Yes. Are you obsessed with shiny things? No. Are you at least attracted to them? I do find them pretty to look at, sure. Do you smash guitars or any other type of instrument? No. I don’t understand that. Are you proud of doing so?  -- So. How bad can I make you look? Why do you want to make me look bad? Besides, I do that well enough on my own.

Do you wash your hands frequently? Yeah, especially since the start of the pandemic. Do you wet the bed? No. What age did you stop? When I was a little kid. Do you lie a lot? No. Have you lied at all in this survey? Nope. I have no reason to. Do you forget to brush your teeth frequently? No, I don’t forget to brush my teeth. Do you brush your hair? Yeah. Do you use antismelly? No. I don’t even know what that is. Are you an alcoholic? No, I don’t even drink. A druggie? Nope, I don’t do drugs. Do you drink illegally? I’m 32 I can do so if I wanted to. Do you wear underwear? Yes. Do you change it frequently? Everyday. Are you a coward? Yeah, you could say that. A loser? Yes. An idiot? Yep. Do you text talk? I use “lol”, “wtf”, “wth”, “omg”, but otherwise no I don’t like to use shorthand. Are you a bad friend? :/ Are you untrustworthy? No. Unreliable? I feel like I haven’t been the most the reliable these past few years. Do you pick your nose? No. Are you imperfect? Yes. Ugly? Yes. Do you have bad hair? Yes. A big nose? No, I don’t think so. Are you shallow? No. Greedy? No. Do you tell people you love them just to get what you want? No, definitely not. I don’t throw those words around and only say it if I mean it. Do you have any /important/ talents? I have no talents. Are you impolite? No, I don’t think so. Disrespectful? No. Do you have buck teeth? No. Acne? Not currently. Mentall illnesses? Yes. Does your breath smell? I hope not. Do you have a strong body odor? No. Do you have bad teeth? I would like to get veneers. Are you overweight? No, I’m too underweight. Anorexic? No. Bulimic? No. Do you have a piercing in an inappropriate spot on your body? No. A tattoo? Nope. Are you a wannabe? Yeah, I wannabe healthy and happy, ha. Do you get bad grades? I got A’s and B’s. Are you a bad guesser? Yeah, I suck. Just tell me what it is. Are you bad at reading people? I think I do a fairly good job at it, actually. Are you too nice for your own good? I used to be that way and got taken advantage of. Do you have a lot of friends? I have zero friends. Do you give in easily? I usually do. Are you stubborn? Very. Are you annoying? I feel like I am. Are you a necrophilliac? No. Are you incestuous? No. Is your room messy? It could use a little straightening up, but it’s not too bad. Do you make fun of other people? No. Do you respect your body? I guess you could say I don’t since there’s things I should be doing to take better care of myself that I don’t do. :/ I’ve neglected myself in a lot of ways. Are you arrogant? No. Do you have low self-esteem? Very. Are you unique? I don’t think I am. Are your hands clammy? No. Are you short? I am. Are you freakishly tall? No. Do you like Simple Plan? I liked some of their songs. It’s been awhile since I’ve listened to them, though.

#personal #text #survey #surveys #over 2000 questions survey series part 5 #long survey #about me

[yue-muffin]

I am finally (finally!!) finishing Yuri on Ice. I started watching it when it first came out, then got impatient of waiting week by week for the next episode, so I figured I would binge watch it when it finished airing. Long story short, got busy and never finished it (I did listen to the soundtrack a bunch though).

So, I figured I would finally finish this show! I’ve been a super casual fan of figure skating since the 2014 Sochi Olympics and I knew a skating anime was going to come eventually, after Hanyu won the gold, so I was really stoked to watch YOI too, haha. Life just happened and I forgot about it.

(Not going to lie, I hate watching sports, except for equestrian events and archery occasionally, but I sat down for a brief moment and that so happened to be when Yuzuru Hanyu was skating his SP. It was the most serendipitous moment of my life haha.)

(But I really do mean “super casual fan”. I never dedicated the time to learn all of the terminology and don’t expect me to name any of the jumps. This will also be a super casual live blog.)

Episodes 1-2

Episode 1

When the animation for this anime is good, it really is good. I feel like skating is a bit tricky. If it’s not done right, it’ll probably look rather choppy since so much of the sport is flowing lines and the amount of athleticism it takes to make good performances look almost effortless.

I really like the opening sequence for this reason. The transition from their child-selves to their adult-selves and the reflection of one person’s career. I feel like I have no comments regarding the opening song. It’s got a catchy beat, the animation is gorgeous, and it’s one of the more memorable anime opening songs I’ve heard. It just fits the theme of the show so well, too.

The Makkachin phone cover is so cute. The amount of detail that went into this show really astounded me. The lanyard clasps and the words on his ID? The website? 

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to really hate chibi-cut-ins and those little interlude infodumps/intros that are common in anime (I think they work best in a manga medium, personally...), but that’s a personal thing.

First time I watched this, my reaction to Russian Yuri was “lol what’s your problem?? edgy little brat”. Still is haha. “I greatly object to sharing a name with a LOSER” is the vibe he gives off. He’s also lucky Yuri is a nice guy and didn’t just punch him for getting so up in his face and screaming at him.

Well, now that was just cruel. He’s having one of those “can it GET any worse” days, to which the universe answers “yes, yes it can”. I’m sure we’ve all had those days where nothing goes right and you just want to curl up and die (aka sleep) until it’s all over.

If there is one thing this show really did well as early as the first 3-4 episodes, it’s depicting Yuri’s mental state. His crushing disappointment in himself, everyone around him trying to cheer him up or talk about what comes next while he’s still just living in the moment, trying to get through the rest of this day.

Ha, my name is pretty common where I grew up, especially at the time I was going to school, and I relate so hard to turning because you hear your name only to realize no one was actually talking to you. Even worse for Yuri because it’s Viktor talking! His idol! Also, I felt it when he froze and walked away after Viktor asked if he wanted a photo with him.

Not going to screenshot everything, not going to screenshot everything...

Yeah, even in my hometown I never knew anyone who skated - ice or roller skating, aside from birthday parties. I personally have two left feet and I’m lucky I managed to stand on the ice without falling, but I never did figure out how to move. My dad had to pull me around (I was 10 or so?). But also, that scene adds some perspective to how Yuri is seen by others, which is important given we live in his head as the watchers of his story. It’s clear that his thoughts of himself don’t necessarily reflect what the public or his friends/family think of him.

A large part of the charm of this series, for me, was that Yuri feels like such a real person - him and his story, his doubts and his hopes (even his weight gain haha), are really relatable even if ice skating is so far removed from myself.

I’m only screenshot-ing dogs now.

Tiny Yuri is so cute though, with his little doggo! 

Haha! And his little blush watching Viktor on tv.

Cuteness overload haha Yuko is so cute?? I love how everyone in his life is supportive in their own way.

Doggos only! Utterly adorable.

Ah, as usual, the live commentary over the skating that I half like because I have no clue what’s going on, but the other half of me just wants to listen and watch in peace lol

No comment on the double performance aside from: ALL THE BUDGET. But honestly if you’re not going to go ham on the performances (especially the best ones) in an anime about ice skating, why even bother lol.

Yuko had triplets. Triplets. I cannot even- (haha I love kids, I work with them for my job occasionally but having THREE of my own to go home would sound like a nightmare).

Doggo! But actually I just really like his apartment. I really like that they gave Viktor a standard poodle Yuri a miniature poodle because I feel like everyone including myself forgets the big floofs exist and in fact are the “standard” size, not the tiny guys.

HERE COMES THAT SCENE. The one that made the internet explode. I kind of still remember the night it aired, lol. I also can’t believe they got the green-light for that, haha.

I also love the social media posts in the ending. Social media in anime is always fun, it’s such a huge part of our lives nowadays. The little glimpses into the lives of the other skaters is not only fun, but makes them feel a little more alive, especially because they won’t be the center of the story.

Episode 2

I promise this one isn’t going to be as long.

This “farewell” gives me live action drama vibes. It’s hilarious.

Under the table! I can’t with the adorableness. Also, now I’m hungry.

I-Is it ok for him to be scratching the tatami like that.

It took me forever to figure out that the random English is likely because they’re supposed to be speaking in English to each other lol. It just makes sense.

At least one of the kids learned their lesson and asked before uploading haha.

Viktor not so subtly trying to find out if he likes or is dating anyone is hilarious. 

And Russian Yuri has a cat! I forgot about that. He does give off alley cat vibes.

Yuri, you literally just had an “ah-ha!” moment, but then couldn’t resist posting a pic of your new buy on social media lol...

I feel like people either like him or hate him (Russian Yuri), but to me he’s just such a teenage boy. They can be assholes sometimes, you know?? And hopefully they grow out of it haha.

I love Yuri’s smirk haha. Yup, don’t engage. He’s an angry 15 year old, you’re a grown ass adult. It’s really hard to forget age differences in anime but what self-respecting adult is actually going to have it out with a teenager being unreasonable?

I also totally forgot they nicknamed Russian Yuri, Yurio in the actual show lol.

OUCH that self-doubt.

The Makkachin tissue box...

Anyways, the first unofficial competition of the show starts next episode! I did see that one when it came out, but I think I stopped after episode 3...

#yuri on ice #yoi #ユーリ!!! on ICE #image heavy post #the muffin's liveblogging adventures #ill probably stop screenshotting only dogs... #probably

[inthedayswhenlandswerefew]

Queen Lyrics for When You’re Feeling Low

1) “But there’s a heartbeat pulse that keeps on pumping, some sunshine ray through a crack in a shutter, or a sight of a light at the end of a tunnel” (Action This Day, Hot Space)

2) “Gotta face up, better grow up, gotta stand tall and be strong” (All God’s People, Innuendo)

3) “But I’m ready, yes I’m ready for you, I’m standing on my own two feet” (Another One Bites The Dust, The Game)

4) “You stand so tall, you don’t frighten me at all” (Back Chat, Hot Space)

5) “Open your eyes, look up to the skies and see” (Bohemian Rhapsody, A Night At The Opera)

6) “Breakthru, these barriers of pain, breakthru, to the sunshine from the rain” (Breakthru, The Miracle)

7) “Some sleepless nights in wait for you, some foreign presence you feel comes creeping through, some stream of hope the whole world through” (Calling All Girls, Hot Space)

8) “I gotta be cool, relax, get hip, get on my tracks” (Crazy Little Thing Called Love, The Game)

9) “I gotta shape up now, you gotta know why” (Dancer, Hot Space)

10) “Fight your battle but you leave on time” (Dead On Time, Jazz)

11) “Go to sleep and dream again, soon your hopes will rise and then” (Dear Friends, Sheer Heart Attack)

12) “Should be waiting for the sun, looking ‘round to find the words to say, should be waiting for the skies to clear” (Doing All Right, Queen)

13) “Hear what I say, don’t lose your way” (Don’t Lose Your Head, A Kind Of Magic)

14) “Tonight I’m gonna have myself a real good time, I feel alive” (Don’t Stop Me Now, Jazz)

15) “When your problems seem like mountains, you feel the need to find some answers, you can leave them for another day” (Don’t Try So Hard, Innuendo)

16) “Don’t try suicide, nobody’s worth it” (Don’t Try Suicide, The Game)

17) “Don’t destroy what you see, your country to be, just keep building on the ground that’s been won” (Father To Son, Queen II)

18) “Oh, got to get rid of this feeling I’m feeling inside” (Feelings Feelings, News Of The World)

19) “Fight from the inside, you can’t win with your hands tied” (Fight From The Inside, News Of The World)

20) “Don’t look back, don’t look back, it’s a rip-off” (Flick Of The Wrist, Sheer Heart Attack)

21) “When you’re through with life and all hope is lost, hold out your hand, ‘cause friends will be friends right ‘til the end” (Friends Will Be Friends, A Kind Of Magic)

22) “Can’t you tell when we get it down, you’re the one, you’re the best in town” (Fun It, Jazz)

23) “Tomorrow comes, tomorrow brings, tomorrow brings love in the shape of things” (Funny How Love Is, Queen II)

24) “You don’t waste no time at all, don’t hear the bell but you answer the call” (Hammer To Fall, The Works)

25) “Wait for the sunrise and everything will seem so clear” (Hang On In There, The Miracle)

26) “These troubled days of cruel rejection, you come to me, soothe my troubled mind” (Heaven For Everyone, Made In Heaven)

27) “Well I tell you my friend, this might seem like the end, but the continuation is yours for the making” (The Hero, Flash Gordon)

28) “I’m having a hard time, I’m walking a fine line between hope and despair” (I Can’t Live With You, Innuendo)

29) “Gotta find me a future, move out of my way” (I Want It All, The Miracle)

30) “God knows, got to make it on my own” (I Want To Break Free, The Works)

31) “I’m caught in a dream and my dream’s come true” (I Was Born To Love You, Made In Heaven)

32) “Keep your chin up when you’re feeling lonely, don’t let ‘em get you down” (If You Can’t Beat Them, Jazz)

33) “So risky, but I gotta chance it” (In The Lap Of The Gods...Revisited, Sheer Heart Attack)

34) “You can be anything you want to be, just turn yourself into anything you think that you could ever be” (Innuendo, Innuendo)

35) “No one knows what I’ve been through, let my flag unfurl” (The Invisible Man, The Miracle)

36) “Sometimes I feel so sad, so sad, so bad, but no one’s gonna stop me now, no one” (It’s A Beautiful Day, Made In Heaven)

37) “It’s a long hard fight, but I’ll always live for tomorrow” (It’s A Hard Life, The Works)

38) “I’ve been wrong but I’ll learn to be right” (It’s Late, News Of The World)

39) “Life is much too short to while away with tears” (Jealousy, Jazz)

40) “Oh get yourself together, things are looking better every day” (Keep Passing The Open Windows, The Works)

41) “All you people keep yourself alive” (Keep Yourself Alive, Queen)

42) “Now listen, no one stops my party” (Khashoggi’s Ship, The Miracle)

43) “One shaft of light that shows the way” (A Kind Of Magic, A Kind Of Magic)

44) “We’re far apart and I’m growing old, but while we live we’ll meet again” (Las Palabras De Amor, Hot Space)

45) “Cause I’ve made my break and I won’t look back, I’ve turned my back on those endless games” (Leaving Home Ain’t Easy, Jazz)

46) “Why don’t you let me make a brand new start” (Let Me Live, Made In Heaven)

47) “Life is cruel, life is a bitch” (Life Is Real, Hot Space)

48) “I lie in wait with open eyes, I carry on through stormy skies” (Lily Of The Valley, Sheer Heart Attack)

49) “Hurry put your troubles in a suitcase, come let the new child play” (Long Away, A Day At The Races)

50) “Forget regrets and just remember, it’s not so long since you were young” (The Loser In The End, Queen II)

51) “You won’t remember when this is blown over, and everything’s all by the way” (Love Of My Life, A Night At The Opera)

52) “I’m playing my role in history, looking to find my goal, taking in all this misery but giving it all my soul” (Made In Heaven, Made In Heaven)

53) “I’m gonna take a little walk on the wild side, I’m gonna loosen up and get me some gas, I’m gonna get me some action” (Man On The Prowl, The Works)

54) “A voice from behind me reminds me, spread out your wings and you are an angel, remember to deliver with the speed of light a little bit of love and joy” (The March Of The Black Queen, Queen II)

55) “Bring out the charge of the love brigade, there is spring in the air once again” (The Millionaire Waltz, A Day At The Races)

56) “The one thing we’re all waiting for is peace on earth and an end to war” (The Miracle, The Miracle)

57) “Come on, take a shot” (Misfire, Sheer Heart Attack)

58) “Somethin’ harder’s coming up, gonna really knock a hole in the wall, gonna hit ya, grab you hard, make you feel ten feet tall” (Modern Times Rock N’ Roll, Queen)

59) “I’ve walked too long in this lonely lane, I’ve had enough of this same old game” (Mother Love, Made In Heaven)

60) “No I’ll never look back in anger, no I’ll never find me an answer” (Need Your Loving Tonight, The Game)

61) “Please don’t you cry anymore, can’t you see, listen to the breeze, whisper to me please” (Nevermore, Queen II)

62) “Oh oh the night comes down, and I get afraid of losing my way” (The Night Comes Down, Queen)

63) “Just a new man, yes you made me live again” (Now I’m Here, Sheer Heart Attack)

64) “Gimme one night, gimme one hope” (One Vision, A Kind Of Magic)

65) “When your plans go wrong and you turn out the light, but inside of your mind you have to put up a fight” (Pain Is So Close To Pleasure, A Kind Of Magic)

66) “Rest your weary head and let your heart decide” (Play The Game, The Game)

67) “No man could understand, my power is in my own hand” (Princes Of The Universe, A Kind Of Magic)

68) “You had your time, you had the power, you’ve yet to have your finest hour” (Radio Ga Ga, The Works)

69) “Your every day is full of sunshine, but into every life a little rain must fall” (Rain Must Fall, The Miracle)

70) “Sometimes I get so low, I just have to ride” (Ride The Wild Wind, Innuendo)

71) “You got your whole life ahead of you” (Sail Away Sweet Sister, The Game)

72) “The slate will soon be clean, I’ll erase the memories, to start again with somebody new” (Save Me, The Game)

73) “Dancing, what a damn jolly good idea” (Seaside Rendezvous, A Night At The Opera)

74) “By flash and thunder-fire and I’ll survive, then I’ll defy the laws of nature and come out alive” (Seven Seas Of Rhye, Queen II)

75) “And the world will surely heal my ills” (She Makes Me, Sheer Heart Attack)

76) “I guess I’m learning, I must be warmer now, I’ll soon be turning ‘round the corner now, outside the dawn is breaking” (The Show Must Go On, Innuendo)

77) “Today the cloud hangs over us and all is grey, but some day, one day” (Some Day One Day, Queen II)

78) “I’m okay, I’m alright, ain’t gonna face no defeat” (Somebody To Love, A Day At The Races)

79) “Pull yourself together ‘cause you know you should do better, that’s because you’re a free man” (Spread Your Wings, News Of The World)

80) “Don’t lose control just hang on out with me” (Staying Power, Hot Space)

81) “Try my best, be a real individual” (Tenement Funster, Sheer Heart Attack)

82) “The nights grow long, but dreams live on” (Teo Torriatte, A Day At The Races)

83) “Oh my friends, it’s been a long hard year, but now it’s Christmas” (Thank God It’s Christmas, The Works sessions [non-album song])

84) “No use sitting and thinkin’ on what you did, when you can lay back and enjoy it through your kids” (These Are The Days Of Our Lives, Innuendo)

85) “But you know I don’t give a light, I’m gonna make out all right” (Tie Your Mother Down, A Day At The Races)

86) “I feel like no one ever told the truth to me, about growing up and what a struggle it would be” (Too Much Love Will Kill You, Made In Heaven)

87) “Can’t we give ourselves one more chance, why can’t we give love that one more chance” (Under Pressure, Hot Space)

88) “Living breathing rock n’ roll, this never-ending fight, was it all worth it, was it all worth it, yes it was a worthwhile experience” (Was It All Worth It, The Miracle sessions [non-album song])

89) “I’ve had my share of sand kicked in my face, but I’ve come through” (We Are The Champions, News Of The World)

90) “Shoutin’ in the street, gonna take on the world someday” (We Will Rock You, News Of The World)

91) “But now I’m the one to decide, who needs, well I don’t need, who needs you” (Who Needs You, News Of The World)

92) “But touch my tears with your lips, touch my world with your fingertips, and we can have forever” (Who Wants To Live Forever, A Kind Of Magic)

93) “A breathtaking scene, with the dreams of the world in the palm of your hand” (A Winter’s Tale, Made In Heaven)

94) “Not tonight, come tomorrow, when everything’s sunny and bright” (You And I, A Day At The Races)

95) “Whenever this world is cruel to me, I got you to help me forgive” (You’re My Best Friend, A Night At The Opera)

#queen #classic rock #queen fandom #borhap fandom #borhap #bohemian rhapsody

[thegoldenyears-memories]

         ☆ MISCHIEF MANAGED, a the marauders mix ☆

“i solemnly swear that i am up to no good.”

                                                                     ( listen )

01. ORPHANS de coldplay ( i want to know when i can go back and get drunk with my friends. i want to know when i can go back and be young again. )

02. THE KIDS AREN’T ALRIGHT de fall out boy ( and in the end, i'll do it all again. i think you're my best friend. don't you know that the kids aren't, kids aren't alright? )

03. THE RECKLESS AND THE BRAVE de all time low ( long live the reckless and the brave. i don't think i want to be saved, my song has not been sung. long live us. )

04. NEW GOLDEN AGE de keane ( we were young, now we wake from the dream, stumble blurry-eyed, find ourselves at the gates of a new golden age. )

05. THE GREAT ESCAPE de boys like girls ( throw it away, forget yesterday. we'll make the great escape. we won't hear a word they say, they don't know us anyway. )

06. 1979 de the smashing pumpkins ( we were sure we'd never see an end to it all. )

07. TIME TO PRETEND de mgmt ( this is our decision to live fast and die young. we've got the vision, now let's have some fun. )

08. RIBS de lorde ( this dream isn't feeling sweet, we're reeling through the midnight streets. it feels so scary getting old. you're the only friend i need, sharing beds like little kids, and laughing 'til our ribs get tough, but that will never be enough. )

09. ENGLAND de the national ( you must be somewhere in london, you must be loving your life in the rain. )

10. HIGH HOPES de panic! at the disco ( mama said fulfill the prophecy, be something greater, go make a legacy, manifest destiny. back in the days we wanted everything. )

11. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS de the beatles ( i get by with a little help from my friends. )

12. SKY’S STILL BLUE de andrew belle ( oh, if you’re hearing this, i must have made it through. oh, when the clouds above open up through my window, I'll see the sky’s still blue. )

13. AND THE BOYS de angus & julia stone ( and the boys go on and on and on and on. and there's gold falling from the ceiling of this world, falling from the things we should have learned, falling from the things we could have heard, falling from the people that we heard, falling from the love we never earned, falling from the sky that should have burned, falling fom my heart. )

14. WE WILL ROCK YOU de queen ( buddy you're a young man hard man, shoutin' in the street gonna take on the world some day. you got blood on yo' face, you big disgrace. wavin' your banner all over the place. we will, we will rock you. )

15. FRIENDS de band of skulls ( i need love 'cause only love is true. i need every waking hour with you, and my friends 'cause they're so beautiful. yeah, my friends they are so beautiful. they're my friends. )

16. WE ARE YOUNG de fun. ft. janelle monáe ( so if by the time the bar closes, and you feel like falling down, i'll carry you home. tonight we are young, so let's set the world on fire, we can burn brighter than the sun. )

17. INVINCIBLE de muse ( during the struggle they will pull us down. please, please, let's use this chance to turn things around. and tonight we can truly say together we're invincible. )

18. DON’T STOP ME NOW de queen ( don't stop me now 'cause i'm having a good time. don't stop me now, yes i'm having a good time, i don't want to stop at all, yeah! )

19. BREAK THE RULES de charli xcx ( i don't wanna go to school, i just wanna break the rules. )

20. KEEPING YOUR HEAD UP de birdy ( don't you know your pain is mine? and i would die a thousand times to ease your mind. hold tight; you're slowly coming back to life. i'll be keeping your head up. )

21. WE’LL BE ALRIGHT de travie mccoy ( we are young, we run free, stay up late, we don’t sleep, got our friends, got the night, we’ll be alright. )

22. YOUNG VOLCANOES de fall out boy ( we are wild, we are like young volcanoes. )

23. A.M. de one direction ( won't you stay 'til the a.m.? all my favourite conversations, always made in the a.m. cause we don't know what we're saying. we're just swimming round in our glasses, and talking out of our asses, like we're all gonna make it. )

24. NEVER GOING BACK de the score ( i'm never gonna follow just because they say so. )

25. US AGAINST THE WORLD de coldplay ( through chaos as it swirls, it's us against the world. )

26. PRINCES OF THE UNIVERSE de queen ( here we are, born to be kings, we're the princes of the universe. here we belong, fighting to survive in a war with the darkest powers. )

27. TIMSHEL de mumford & sons ( but you are not alone in this, and you are not alone in this, as brothers we will stand and we'll hold your hand, hold your hand. )

28. CARRY ON de fun. ( 'cause we are, we are shining stars, we are invincible. we are who we are on our darkest day, when we’re miles away, so we'll come, we will find our way home. )

29. RUNNING WITH THE WOLVES de aurora ( i'm running with the wolves tonight. )

30. MY BLOOD de twenty one pilots ( when everyone you thought you knew deserts your fight, i'll go with you. you're facin' down a dark hall, i'll grab my light and go with you. )

31. LEGENDARY de welshly arms ( yeah, we're gonna be legends. gonna teach 'em all a lesson. got this feeling in our souls we carry that it's about to be legendary. )

32. LIVE LIKE LEGENDS de ruelle ( this is our time, no turning back. we could live, we could live like legends. )

33. LANDSLIDE de fleetwood mac ( well, i've been afraid of changing, 'cause i've built my life around you. but time makes you bolder, even children get older, and i'm getting older too. )

34. VIVA LA VIDA de coldplay ( i used to rule the world, seas would rise when i gave the word. now in the morning i sleep alone, sweep the streets i used to own. )

35. WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS de queen ( we are the champions, my friends. and we'll keep on fighting 'til the end. we are the champions, we are the champions. no time for losers, 'cause we are the champions of the world. )

36. MARCHIN ON de one republic ( there's so many wars we fought, there's so many things we're not, but with what we have, i promise you that we're marching on. )

37. FOREVER YOUNG de youth group ( forever young, i want to be forever young. do you really want to live forever? forever young. )

38. THINGS WE LOST IN THE FIRE de bastille ( do you understand that we will never be the same again? the future's in our hands and we will never be the same again. )

39. HEROES NEVER DIE de unsecret & krigarè ( don't give up the fight, 'cause heroes never die. )

40. GOLDEN DAYS de panic! at the disco ( oh don't you wonder when the light begins to fade? and the clock just makes the colors turn to grey. forever younger growing older just the same, all the mem'ries that we make will never change. and i swear that i'll always paint you golden days. )

41. HOW FAR WE’VE COME de matchbox twenty ( i believe the world is burning to the ground, oh well i guess we're gonna find out. let's see how far we've come. well i believe it all is coming to an end. oh well, i guess, we're gonna pretend. let's see how far we've come. )

42. WAY DOWN WE GO de kaleo ( oh, father tell me, do we get what we deserve? )

43. RUNNING UP THAT HILL de placebo ( and if i only could make a deal with god and get him to swap our places. be running up that road, be running up that hill, be running up that building, if i only could. )

44. GOOD OLD DAYS de macklemore ft. kesha ( i wish somebody would have told me, babe, that someday these will be the good old days. all the love you won't forget and all these reckless nights you won't regret. 'cause someday soon, your whole life's gonna change. you'll miss the magic of the good old days. )

45. OH BROTHER de saint raymond ( who are you to say we can't stand up to face it all again. show me where you hide, bring this back to life, who will hear us cry, oh, brother. )

46. CHARLIE BROWN de coldplay ( we'll run wild, we'll be glowing in the dark. )

47. TIME OF OUR LIVES de tyrone wells ( it's hard to walk away from the best of days, but if it has to end, i'm glad you have been my friend in the time of our lives. )

48. HEROES de david bowie ( we can be heroes, for ever and ever. what d'you say? )

49. ALL THESE THINGS THAT I’VE DONE de the killers ( when there's nowhere else to run, is there room for one more son? )

50. DON’T THREATEN ME WITH A GOOD TIME de panic! at the disco ( this night is heating up, raise hell and turn it up. oh yeah, don't threaten me with a good time. )

51. CENTURIES de fall out boy ( some legends are told, some turn to dust or to gold. but you will remember me, remember me for centuries. )

52. I LIVED de one republic ( hope when the moment comes, you'll say... i, i did it all. i, i did it all. i owned every second that this world could give. i saw so many places, the things that i did. with every broken bone, i swear i lived. )

53. CASTLE ON THE HILL de ed sheeran ( i still remember these old country lanes, when we did not know the answers. and i miss the way you make me feel, and it's real, when we watched the sunset over the castle on the hill. )

54. HEY JUDE de the beatles ( and anytime you feel the pain, hey, jude, refrain. don't carry the world upon your shoulders. )

55. MY OLD FRIEND de sam amidon ( my old friend, i recall, times we had are hanging on my wall. i wouldn't trade them for gold. they laughed and they cried me, and somehow sanctified me. my old friend, this song's for you, 'cause a few simple verses was the least that i could do, to tell the world that you were here. the love and the laughter will live on long after all of the sadness and the tears. we'll meet again, my old friend. )

56. I WAS HERE de beyoncé ( i was here. i lived, i loved, i was here. i did, i've done everything that i wanted, and it was more than i thought it would be. i will leave my mark so everyone will know i was here. )

57. SEE YOU AGAIN de wiz khalifa ft. charlie puth ( it's been a long day without you, my friend. and i'll tell you all about it when i see you again. we've come a long way from where we began, oh, i'll tell you all about it when i see you again. )

58. DEATH WILL NEVER CONQUER de coldplay ( if sweet death should ever come for me, let me know, boys, let me know. if you hear him coming, won't you let me flee. let me go, boys, let me go. )

59. TO BUILD A HOME de the cinematic orchestra ( there is a house built out of stone. wooden floors, walls and window sills. tables and chairs worn by all of the dust. this is a place where i don't feel alone, this is a place where i feel at home. and i built a home for you, for me. until it disappeared from me, from you. )

60. A WINDOW TO THE PAST de john williams

╰  ❄  feliz navidad y año nuevo, tiff.

—; de: andy ( @thelonelyykitty​ )

—; para: tiff ( @canut0​ )

Querida Tiffany (HEH):

Primero que nada, perdón por el regalo de Agatha shjGDJSDSDSD. Ya sabes que odia a Sirius con su alma. Perdón DSHSJDSDSDDS. 

Segundo, para compensar eso te armé este hermoso mix de nuestros bebés favoritos. Siempre quise hacerles uno, ¡y esta fue mi oportunidad! Fui muy feliz, la verdad. Los amo muchísimo desde siempre y tienen un lugar muy especial en mi corazoncito, así que hacerlo fue very divertido y emotivo. Lloré unas cinco veces. Te aconsejo y te pido que escuches cada canción y leas cada letra, porque sólo coloqué las frases más significativas, cuando hay mucho más (esto es porque son 60 canciones y si ponía todo, iba a tardar una eternidad). Spotify no tenía una canción but puse un link a youtube para que la escuches, hehehe. Espero te guste mucho, mucho. Definitivamente busqué ir desde sus tiempos más inocentes y bonitos, hasta cuando todo se va a la… A un lugar muy triste. Creo que existe una reticencia a crecer de parte de ellos, porque de pronto fueron lanzados a una guerra y se vieron obligados a lidiar con un asunto de adultos cuando eran aún niños, a pesar de escogerlo, y de sentirse heroicos... Fue demasiado para ellos. Intenté involucrar ese tema también, cómo se fueron perdiendo los años dorados y terminaron en... Lo que es, ya sabes. Su historia me parece sumamente triste, so... Hice algo muy triste también HSSDGDSSD. Like primero fueron muy felices y tenían esa amistad tan inquebrantable y real, y después ALGUIEN peter decidió mandar todo a un lugar nada agradable y bueno, se rompió todo eso y se magulló la historia. Al menos vivieron la locura al full, supongo hdjssdsdjsd. Creyeron que todos iban a salir vivos e igual de la guerra *sigue llorando*, al final fueron... *llora más fuerte*... Legendarios *llora demasiado*. Ojalá llores con Landslide como yo, digo que. Así que ten una playlist muy feliz y al mismo tiempo muy triste, justo como ellos. Disfrútala, llora como lo hice yo con la última canción, pregúntate porque Rowling nos quitó todo, y lo más importante: sé feliz. 

Soy muy mala en estas cartas, porque literal siento que nunca me expreso totalmente, pero lo intento. Espero sepas que te quiero mucho y me alegra que sigamos en contacto después de conocernos por tanto tiempo. Siempre has sido bien linda conmigo y MUY, MUY DIVERTIDA, en verdad me has hecho reír demasido. Eres mi bebé *peina su cabello y la mente en una mantita*. Gracias por continuar aquí y por todos los bonitos momentos de nuestra amistad, eres de lo más linda. Espero hayas tenido una hermosa Navidad y Año nuevo, y que este año sea muy bueno para ti en todos los aspectos, porque mereces ser muy feliz. Mis mejores deseos para ti, bebé, nunca olvides lo linda que eres y cuanto vales. Sabes que aquí estamos cualquier cosa y ojalá sepas lo importante que eres. ¡Te quiero muuuuucho! Te dejo un abracito fuerte y cariñoso. Gracias por todo, todito. 

P.D.: No sé si era “a marauders mix” o “a the marauders mix”, pero le dejé el segundo porque tenía más sentimiento, siono.

Con musho amors, 

                                                 — andy ♡. 🎅

#sirius #santa secreto 2019 #mix

[thegoldenavenger]

Music Tag Game Because I Can

Tag fellow music freaks.

Last song you listened to: 

Favorite T.V. show jam:

>> [Just a Comet] / “ This life in the stars is all I've ever known / Stars and stardust and infinite space is my only home” 

>> [home again] / “ Oh, it's good to be back home again / Sometimes it feels like this road has no end / Oh, how I long to be back home again”

>> [art of the dress] / “ Thread by thread, stitching it together “

Favorite movie tune: 

>> [Recuérdame] / “ Recuérdame / No llores por favor / Te llevo en mi corazón y cerca me tendrás / A solas yo te cantaré soñando en regresar”

>> [Disobedient] / “When I think about / All the wasted time I've spent / I wanna be disobedient”

>> [Why don’t you do right] / “like some other men do” 

Last song best friend sent you: 

>> [Frog Lullaby] / “At night when the lake is a mirror / And the moon rides the waves to the shore / A single soul sets his voice singing”

Song you do chores to most: 

>> [Theme for Iron Man Armoured Adventures] / “In a dangerous world he does all he can / he’s iron man!” 

Music you read to most:  

>> [Rain & Thunderstorm Sounds | Crackling Fireplace | 3 Hours]

Best break up song:  

>> [Therianthropy] / “I’ll pick up speed / drop weight that i don’t need / and people want to play for keeps / i better change my policies”

>> [Red Flag Valentine] / “ We’ve all made mistakes /I’d hate to make more. / I think i’ll let you go / just one day before.”

Best belt it out song: 

>> [First Burn] / “ You have married an Icarus / He has flown too close to the sun”

>> [Believed In] / “I’ve lost a piece of myself” 

Favorite ship song:  

>> [Disarm You] / “So let me disarm you / There's an army I'm finding around your heart / Let me disarm you / 'Cause baby I just want to love who you really are”

Song you always recommend: 

Best angst fest song:  

>> [Sleep] / “maybe it’s the weight of all the promises i can’t keep / but the universe will not let me sleep]

>> [Overstepping Lines] / “And though they make me want to shout and scream and lie in bed”

Best its Furry but you love it song: 

>> [I AM] / “i am the glow everything has on acid / i am your hit to keep it lit before you pass it”

>> [20 percent cooler] / “you can call me the king or the ruler / felon on bass, gettin’ hoarse on the mic” 

Song you ugly cry to: 

>> [don’t forget] / “there’s a light inside your soul / that’s still shining in the dark”

Favorite character song: 

>> [home] / “ Even if we're worlds apart / stay in my heart / Someday when you've a choice to make / I hope you'll think of me”

>> [Undying/Undying] / “ And I think I understand you / God, it’s true / You want to make them pay for what they’ve / Done to you”

Favorite song in a different language: 

>> [Smile Song] / “Atashi wa Pinkie Pie! / Hello!”

>> [no me doy por vencido] / “yo quiero un mundo contigo” 

Most replayed song:  

>> [skavenger megalovania] / “on days like these / kids like you” 

>> [skavenger bonetrousel] / “NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH-- HEH HEH?”

Song you hate the most:  

Favorite villian song:  

>> [Wait for It] / “if there’s a reason / i’m still alive / when everyone around me has died” 

>> [other friends] / “i’m the loser of the the game you  / didn’t know you were playing / let’s play another game / this time i get to win”

Pissed off jam: 

>> [Machine] / “I read social cues like inputs / what i spit out isn’t formatted to read”

Song you hate but sing anyway cause itz a bop: 

Song you’d play at your funeral:  

>> [Goodbye, Blue Sky] / “With the promise of a brave new world unfurled beneath the clear blue sky”

Your dramatic entrance jam: 

>> [Death by Glamour] / “Oh yeah”

>> [No Healing in Wonderland] / “3, 2, 1, let’s go!”

Song you murder strut to:  

>> [Crystalmanthequins] /  [S] Make Her Pay

>> [Black] / [S] Jack: Ascend.

Song that best describes you:  

>> [it’s okay i wouldn’t remember me either] / “Compulsively complaining when I haven’t got the right / i hate the way i think and act”

>> [little lion man] / “weep for yourself my man / you’ll never be what is in your heart]

>> [still a piece of garbage] / “oh hey thanks for checking in”

Earworm that just won’t quit:  

>> [Super Ponybeat -- Discord] / “ I'm not a fan of puppeteers but I've a nagging fear / someone else is pulling at the strings”

>> [Fantasy Costco] / “we’ve got a deal for you”

Dramatic car ride staring out the window jam: 

>> [Iron Man] / “you are relentless” 

>> [the thunder rolls] / “he’s headed back from somewhere / he never should have been”

Guilty pleasure song:

#this took hours... #long post #dash stretcher #im sorry #thanks for tagging me dreamy #i love music

[misha-moose-dean-burger-lover]

Happy vacation! 🌴 For your prompt request, may I submit Dean and Cas taking a non-hunt road trip for you consideration. Maybe they're on vacation too? As much as they can ever be? Destiel ship or not, and whatever other characters you want to include, if any. I hope that gets your brain juices going, and you have a not-sad before long! 😘 Thank thank thank you!

Thank you very much for the prompt!! Yeah, I had a not-sad XD It did get some of my brain juices going, and I did write something - it’s like a five-piece drabble, but I hope it’s up to your liking! The pleasure was all mine! You’re awesome!! ^-^

***

“‘Driver picks music, shotgun shuts his cakehole’, I know.” Cas declared, quoting Dean to Dean, and earning himself a grin, as he withdrew his hand from the music deck. “I was just trying my luck.”

“Your bad,” Dean shrugged, before turning up his own music. Bob Seger.

But around the time 'Beautiful Loser’ ends, Dean has given in, and is actively trying to reach a compromise with Cas on the music decision.

They listen to 'Let it be’, and okay, that’s a fine enough coincidence. Sam would’ve abused any such right Dean gave him to listen to One Direction maybe, so Dean’s grateful its Cas with him on this long-ass drive, when he’s in a sharing mood when it comes to Baby’s casette player.

*

Cas was looking out the window, serious and pensive, as if he was contemplating the truths of the Universe.

Dean could’ve scoffed, but he tried a novel approach. 'Vienna’ had just ended, following some other inspirational songs like that - and the mood was all set for a joke. Dean cleared his throat.

“And that’s the thing about life too,” Dean began, all of a sudden, hiding his smirk, one hand on the wheel and the other demonstrating in the air with vague hand motions, which Cas tried to follow, squinting and trying to process it. “Its about the journey and not the destination. You hear me, Cas?”

“I do.” Cas replied stoically, perfectly serious.

“Yeah, that’s life, man.” Dean dramatized, pulling off a straight face with much efforts. “A road, which goes on and on, and there’s no destination in sight, only in mind. Such is life too, man, and it’s the journey that’s important, because you may have goals in your head, but you can’t see them - you’ve just gotta keep living, and keep going down that road.”

“Oh.” Cas absorbs, like Dean is spilling gems of wisdom here.

“Driving to a hunt is something completely other than driving for the sake of driving, Cas,” It’s getting harder and harder for Dean to keep up the act of wise, when Cas looks at him that straight-faced. “Driving on an open road, on the road to nowhere yet everywhere is the best feeling - driving without a destination that’s the true essence of living, and of driving.”

“Dean.” Cas blinked, and began to speak in his monotonous baritone. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but we do have a destination.”

Dean frowns at him.

“Do you not remember?” Cas goes on, sincere as all hell. “We’re going to the beach. Sam is driving there with Jack, but he took a detour to pick up Claire and Kaia - and I - I have Google Maps on my phone, in case you forget the route as Sam said you might.”

“Goddammit Cas,” Dean rolls his eyes, unable to believe his freaking ears. “Did you really just think I was serious, right there?”

“You sounded explicitly like you meant it. I believed you were influenced by all the Billy Joel we’ve been listening to.”

“It’s called a goddamn joke.” Dean glared back, incredulous. “It hurts me to think you could ever think of me as that kind of a pretentious dumbass, I sounded worse than Kale-Sam, you dumbass!”

Cas fell silent. “I’m sorry..?”

“You just lost the right to be subjected to a joke ever, Cas. Think about what you did, I’m not talking to you anymore.” Dean smirked at him, and turned his attention more dedicatedly to the road, feeling the nag of Castiel’s disappointed-in-himself stare until he turns up the volume and Bon Jovi begins to play.

*

“We could talk instead,” Cas suggests, all of a sudden, when Dean’s sifting through his CDs. “There’s been a lot of songs, all day.”

“You say it like that’s a bad thing.” Dean shot back. “And talk, Cas? What about? The whole point of a vacation is that we don’t work or talk about it -”

“Then let’s talk about something else, Dean.” Cas adds, as if it were that obvious.

“Like?”

“I don’t know,” Cas defended. “The talking was my idea. If I suggest the topics too, what will be your contribution, Dean?”

Dean laughs at that, because it’s a well-worn joke but hearing Cas say it is different, because he’s Cas, and he’s not really supposed to say things like this. Except when he does, and surprises him, and Dean’s speechless for a pleasant fucking change. “'Kay, smartass, I’ll contribute.”

Cas waits, with a smile prompt on his lips, bringing out some newish dimples.

“I’ll contribute by laughing or in monosyllables, as you tell me a story.” Dean spoke, without really thinking about it. “I’m driving, so you should be the one doing the talking anyways - and it was your brilliant idea, so hit me with your best move now! Amuse me, Castiel.”

“Fine. May I speak of themes which don’t include your Earth?”

Dean has to turn his head ninety degrees to see the expression on Cas’s face before he realizes that the angel is hella serious.

He nods, stifling a grin, and Cas begins - sounding more into 'talking’, than he’s hardly ever been - and it’s a good look on him.

*

“Its getting late, Dean.” Cas remarked. “Will we drive all night?”

“Yeah, probably.” Dean replied, unthinking. “Why?”

“Well, Sam told me you’d probably put up at a truck stop since we’re on a vacation, and I’d like to be ready if you do.” Cas answered, simply.

“Ready?” Dean repeated.

“I mean, mentally.” Cas nodded. “To be around company.”

“Yeah, you around freakin’ chicks is a fairytale.” Dean chuckled, before shaking his head. “And, nah. No truck stops, no cheap roadhouses. If you want, though, we can check in at some motel.”

“I don’t sleep.”

“Peachy. Then we can dine in that awesome steak place in Aspen,” Dean hummed under his breath as he reminisced upon the said item. “And take it on from there, for the rest of the night.”

“Of course. And if you’re ever tired,” Cas smiled. “I don’t sleep, so I can drive.”

“That’s never happening, but hey, you offered,” Dean raised his eyebrows and smirked at him. “Points for efforts, Cas. But I’m staying behind the wheel and you can stay put just where you are, all night.”

Almost obstinately, and with a deliberate frown, Cas shifted an inch towards the middle. “I’m more comfortable here.”

“Ah, a rebel,” Dean threw his head back and laughed, having to swerve dangerously to get out of the way of a truck - which made Cas stretch to take the wheel from him, which resulted in Dean swatting his hand away and telling him to trust my skills, Cas, driving’s the one thing I can actually do!

*

Cas was smiling. That was the thing. He didn’t smile all that much, and when he did, it was mostly because of a lame joke that earned him a courtesical smile - or genuine prevention-of-an-apocalypse happiness. But here he was, smiling for the sake of it, fucking glowing even in the little light of the moon. All eye crinkles and multiple dimples, and absolutely no words on his lips, as he prepped his elbow on the rolled down window - mirroring Dean - and looked our the window.

Dean liked seeing him like this, and if there was a warm feeling behind his ribs, it was probably because he felt sorta responsible. He had to be, right? Cas and him had driven, side by side, across miles and miles of road, for hours on end. They’d listened to classics, talked about craters on the moon, and occasionally, steaks medium rare. It had been a good day.

“You’re in a good mood today, buddy.” Dean couldn’t help himself, when Cas sipped from his beer with the smile consistently dangling from his lips.

“Yes, well, I do not like being stuck in the backseat as much as you’d think.” Cas threw back, with as relaxed a tone as one’d ever get from him.

“If you want me to advocate you being shotgun, or at least suggest rock-paper-scissors between you and Sam for getting to sit next to me - what’s in it for me?” Dean smirked, sliding closer to Cas.

“I’d like to believe that I take up less space, will let you play your albums without sneaking mine into the player, and am considerably less likely to complain about your driving.” Cas returned, crinkling into a smile that even showed his gums, and yep. Dean could live with this sort of smiles from his Angel.

“Throw in being like this all the time, and Sold.” Dean winked, resisting the urge to lean in and do something, because Cas looked happy and wonderful and yeah, this was a goddamm vacation that they’d earned, and he was gonna celebrate the hell outta it.

#sheya shall deliver #writing prompt #ask #supernatural #spn #destiel #deancas #casdean #domestic destiel #impala #a deancas drabble #destiel fluff #destiel crack #destiel fanfiction #i wrote a thing #road trip #dean winchester #castiel #roadhouse #fluffy

[hoekkage]

🌙

#good night losers don’t forget to listen to the best song in the universe #ae #🥖.txt

[pianoperson]

Get to know me (if you want)

No one asked for this. Questions are from @chvmpagne-and-gasoline so if you wanna answer them, feel free to.

1. 6 of the songs you listen to the most?

La Campanella by Liszt, Humoresque by Dvorak, Rolling Girl by wowaka, Servant of Evil by mothy (?), Circles by Kira (?), Comptine D’un Autre Été (yes I don’t give a damn about pop culture)

2. If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Brett and Eddy from TwoSet

3. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“1997—X-Wing vs. TIE Fighter” from Armada by Ernest Cline

4. Who do you think about most?

My real life friends because they’re great, and IkeRev guys (especially Jonah)

5. What does your latest text message from someone else say?

Asking them where they are

6. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

With. How do people sleep without clothes?

7. What’s your strangest talent?

Having random thoughts enter my mind that actually predict the future (but I never really tell anyone so)

8: Girls are cool; Boys are cool. (everyone is cool period)

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Nope, well at least I don’t think so. But I did write a poem about someone (it was never meant to be a roast poem, just a poem that was meant to be an outlet for my sadness, but it was accidentally written in such a way that it can be interpreted as one)

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

Bold of you to assume I ever played guitar. The closest was ukelele but that was for school.

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

No

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

No, unless your finger counts (hey, it gets bothersome sometimes to feel something within your nostril)

13: What’s your religion?

Roman Catholic

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Either I’m going out to eat or exercising

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind, but I always end up in front of it

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

I don’t have a favorite band.

17: What was the last lie you told?

It was probs a yes to a question I no longer remember.

18: Do you believe in karma?

I joke about it, but honestly, no.

19: What does your URL mean?

I’m a person who likes piano. That’s it.

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

My greatest weakness is being too cautious to the point I get tense due to fear of failure. My greatest strength is probably scrape by school with grades 90 and above without putting in my best.

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Bold of you to assume I even have one.

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Nope, never

23: How do you vent your anger?

If I want to rant, I either rant alone or with people who think alike. But that’s with  really shallow stuff. If it’s really bad anger, I tend to keep it to myself because I feel like I’m gonna waste people’s time and my own energy.

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

None

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Depends. But I’ll go with talking on the phone.

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Nope. Not yet.

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

I hate Edgar Bright’s voice the sound of a spoon or fork accidentally scraping against the plate. I love the sound of pianos and flutes.

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if I screw up so badly that I’ll end up a failure, a loser, and a loner for the rest of my life and end up dying in pain alone?

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Ghosts, no. Aliens, a bit.

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

With my right, I touch air. With my left, I touch the TV screen,

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

Nothing

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

If it smells like garbage, then automatically, it’s the worst place for me. And I’ve been to a number of places like that so I can’t specify.

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

West Coast just because I’ve been there

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

Does Jonah Clemence count? He sings lol But in all seriousness, none.

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

Life is like a Pokemon game. You’re not going to win all those battles, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t give up. But if your life is Pokemon X and Y, you’re lucky.

36: Define Art.

Art is something universal yet personal.

37: Do you believe in luck?

Yes. Of course, you need to work hard, but you still have to hope that things go your way.

38: What’s the weather like right now?

Pretty cool since it’s nighttime. Clear skies too.

39: What time is it?

10:07pm

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

Nope. 

41: What was the last book you read?

Armada by Ernest Cline. It’s a great read, especially if you read Ready Player One by the same author.

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Yes. Everyone around me finds it weird.

43: Do you have any nicknames?

Yeah 

44: What was the last film you saw?

Infinity War

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

When I was grade one, I fell and hit my head. 

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Never had, never tried.

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

IkeRev I guess

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

Bi

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Yep. Quite a bit.

50: Do you believe in magic?

Nope. But I wish I have.

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

Nope, because that’s a waste of time and energy. Also, I tend to forget they even did anything to me lol

52: What is your astrological sign?

Sagittarius

53: Do you save money or spend it?

For school and food, spend. Otherwise, save.

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

Takeout from a restaurant because there was no food at home.

55: Love or lust?

Love

56: In a relationship?

Nope

57: How many relationships have you had?

Was single, has been single, always will be single

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

I think I used to, but no.

59: Where were you yesterday?

At home

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

Nope

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

Nope

62: What’s your favourite animal?

Idk. My dog I guess.

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I don’t even try.

64: Where is your best friend?

At home

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

@just-shower-thoughts​ @extramadness​ @laineclemence​ @theundyingskeleton​ @valkryie-nyte​

66: What is your heritage?

Filipino with a bit of Chinese and Spanish

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Answering some questions on Tumblr

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

He doesn’t have one.

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

Sorry, what does that even mean?

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

Considering I talk to myself a lot, yes.

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Go to work. I don’t think I can save that dog.

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

Yes I will tell my family and friends that I will die. Yes I will be very afraid. I will go to confession as soon as possible and perhaps try to do some stuff before I die.

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Trust

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

The One That Got Away by Katy Perry just because nostalgia

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

My lips are sealed about that.

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Being great friends grants a great relationship.

77: How can I win your heart?

You can’t.

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

No, but it can make you do the things you want to do by removing all insecurities and inhibitions preventing you from doing those things.

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Staying alive

80: What size shoes do you wear?

If we’re talking about closed shoes, size 5

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

Never thought about it

82: What is your favourite word?

Right now, it’s Queen.

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Jonah Clemence (ok how many times have I said his name in this post)

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

“Lol”, “nice”, “I wanna die.”, or “Patayin mo na ako.”

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

Melt’s cover of Rolling Girl

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Blue and black

87: What is your current desktop picture?

A galaxy

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

I don’t want to have that on my conscience and my record so nope.

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Do I have a kink?

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Clutch my blanket and stay still, trying to think of a way to get them out without inadvertently causing my death.

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Psychic powers

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

That one time I touched a thermometer that wasn’t supposed to be touched in grade two. Everyone got mad at me for it. It took me three or four years to get over the shame from that incident.

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

2016. What a time waster.

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

That’s uncomfortable...

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Iceland just because it sounds great

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

Nope

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

Never, which is great

98: Ever been on a plane?

Yep

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

Jesus is the answer.

#asks #personal

[taeulips]

Love Me Right

Byun Baekhyun, the college football team’s greatest runner back and also your ex-boyfriend. The two of you were the complete opposites and were never expected to last. He was the hottest guy at Exo University, while you were the school's laid-back dance captain.

❝ If I could go back in time, I’d make sure to love you right. ❞

pairing: baekhyun x reader

genre: ex-boyfriend/exo playing college football

warnings:  Strong Language, Alcohol Abuse, Drug Abuse, Emotional Abuse, PTSD, Graphic Violence, Graphic Sexuality.

Unedited

Flashback

CHAPTERS: 01, 02, 03, 04 (final)

“Ms. Y/L/N,” Professor Choi Siwon, called for you just as you were going to leave his dismissed class. “Yes, professor?” You gave a shy smile, which wasn’t something out of ordinary considering his good looks. 

“You’re doing very well in my math class right now, so would you like a bonus opportunity?”

Immediately your mind wondered to inappropriate things that made you blush harder. He’s your professor, you profusely repeated to yourself. “Uh, w-what kind of extra credit ?” You stumbled over your own words as you become awkward for thinking about your professor in such a way. His eyes remained glued to his paperwork, “Ah well I would just need you to tutor some students.” 

It was definitely what your imagination had hoped he’d say, but it calmed your hormonal thoughts. “I would like to do that professor,” You nodded. Professor Choi finally looked at your through his half-moon spectacles and gave you that smile that made all the college girls swoon. “Good! You’ll start today then, be in the library around noon.” 

Looking at your watch you realized you had ten minutes to get there, “Oh I should get going then, have a good day professor!” 

.....

Most of the students were already partnered up with a tutor once you finally arrived. Professor Choi Siwon’s class to your dismay had been on the opposite side of the library. You spun around and hit your forehead with your hand in frustration. Taking a deep breath you walked towards an empty table and waited for anyone to walk in as you played games on your phone. A voice cleared their throat causing you to look up from your phone. Jumping slightly as you were unaware of their presence you turned towards the voice. “Uh, I this the- Um is where the math thing is,” He rubbed the back of his neck not able to look at you. He had on an EXO University football varsity jacket, and you could tell he was embarrassed to be here. But, you learned many of the football players liked to keep up a reputation.

“Uh, yeah it is, I can tutor you. What’s your name?” You gestured him to sit down at your table. “I’m Oh Sehun. And can you not tell anyone about this?” He whispered to you as you pulled out your textbooks. “Why?” 

“Coach Heechul made me be here, and if the rest of the boys found out they’d pick on me!” He whisper yelled in an exasperated tone. You couldn’t help but laugh at him. He scoffed and crossed his arms as a child would. “Oh stop being a baby, I won’t tell your big bros okay?” 

“I am not a baby,” He glared at you in the most adorable way. 

“Whatever floats your boat, loser,” You shrugged while turning to page 24 of your textbook. The both of you studied for three hours, with occasional breaks in between. Sehun either did something stupid that made you laugh or asked you questions during those breaks. “Do you have a boyfriend?” He asked leaning on his elbows. “Gosh, why, are you looking for one?”  You quipped back to him. He rolled his eyes as he took a sip of his water. “Or do you already have one?” He nearly choked on the water he had been drinking, causing you to laugh even more. “When is your test for college algebra anyway?” You asked him. 

“Next week before the game,” He answered while taking off his varsity jacket. You nodded, “Okay well I’m going to be pretty busy the next couple of days with the cheer tryouts, so what days and times are you available?” 

Sehun and you both worked out the times and decided it would just be best to meet up around nine to ten at night at his frat house since he had practices and school during the mornings and afternoon. 

“Okay well I have to go sign up for the tryouts, I’ll see you tomorrow Sehun,” You both packed up your stuff and parted ways. 

....

“Are you coming?” You called new foreign exchange roommate, Lalisa or Lisa as she mainly went by. “Of course! I’m parking my car right now, just sign my name for me please, I’ll be there in a second!” Considering Lisa was your ride, you went ahead and did her the favor. “Alright, I’ll sign you up. Meet you at tryouts in a bit, bye!” 

“Ah, you’re the best Y/N! Bye!” 

The call ended and you were about to leave when Jessica Jung scoffed at you. “The lady foxes only want people with talent,” She giggled along with her friends. Taeyeon the college's beauty stifled her laughter holding a hand up for them to stop. “Girls, nonsense anyone can join. Besides it’s funnier to see girls with no talent make fools of themselves at tryouts,” She gave a devious smile. The gym filled with girls dressed in red baseball tee shirts and black spandex all laughed along with the school’s beauty. Taeyeon adjusted her red baseball tee which she altered to look like a crop top on her. 

A loud group of boys dressed in their football varsity jackets entered the gym. One with dark grey hair that was perfectly styled lazily wrapped an arm around Taeyeon’s waist. “Hey babe, hope you don’t mind us watching.”

Taeyeon giggled, “Of course not Baek!” 

As they greeted each other in a way that made you cringe, you made eye contact with Sehun who gave you an awkward pretend-like-you-don’t-know-me smile.

You gave a smiling type of smirk as you focused your attention back to Taeyeon, “Hm well if I am as talent-less as you say, then you wouldn’t have a problem with me challenging you then?” 

Taeyeon laughed, “Are you trying to embarrass yourself even more?” She looked down onto the clipboard and read your name, “Y/N, fine you want to challenge me, but I’m warning you I’m the best. I can dance to anything so go ahead and pick whatever song.” As everyone stepped aside and sat in the bleachers to watch, you went ahead and hooked up your phone to the aux. You gave your phone to the coach Victoria Song to play when you were ready. You gave her a nod to start playing the music and Yellow Claw’s “DJ Turn It Up” began blasting through the speakers. Taeyeon let you go first as she listened to the song to get a feel, and the two of you both went against each other. Though, in the end, you finished while Taeyeon narrowed her eyes at you. Lisa you realized had finally got there and led the cheer everyone did for you, “Y/N! Y/N!” 

Everyone was inside the gym was impressed and you couldn’t help but feel like someone was intently watching you. Turning to the source you turned to see it was Taeyeon’s boyfriend, Baekhyun. “You should be apart of the team!” Coach Song said to you in which Taeyeon scoffed and whined, “Coach I don’t think we should!” 

You rolled your eyes, “Don’t worry keep your team exclusive, I’m going to start my own dance team.” You didn’t why you’d said it at the time, but you blame the adrenaline rush dancing always gave you. Lisa and a couple of other girls who Taeyeon rejected that day followed you as you talked to the Dean, Lee Soo-man, to get a dance team started. Which would be called the “Vixens” 

.....

“Wow, you were so cool that day!” Sehun gushed as you walked into his frat house. You laughed at him and shook your head. “I guess,” You shrugged trying your best to remain humble. “Wait, did you say before you didn’t want anyone to find out I tutor you for extra credit?” 

“Wait you are doing this for extra credit?” 

“Well yeah it’s not like I’d do this out of the kindness of my heart,” You rolled your eyes. He scoffed, “Gosh, this woman I thought we were friends. Anyways, you don’t have to worry about my big bros.” You nodded trying to follow him through the mess scattered around the house.  Left and right you were dodging piles of clothes and footballs as you went up the staircase. “And we’ll become friends once you level up,” You answered him. “How do I level up?” He questioned turned left down a hall of doors. You gave a shrug as he opened a door, “That’s for you to figure out.”  He rolled his eyes at your comment. “Here put this outside the door,” He said passing you his football helmet as you both entered into his room. “Uh, why?”

“It’s uh sweaty? So it might smell the room up.”

You rolled your eyes at his sassy demeanor but complied with his command. His room overall looked like he tried to clean it up, but of course, he was still a mess. “Where are your teammates anyway?” 

“They went out to a party, so they won’t bother us.”

You both studied for a good two hours before you had to go back to the dorms considering it was almost midnight. “That was good for today, but study what we went over before you go to bed,” You ordered him as you gathered your belongings. He nodded, “For sure.” 

As you came down the staircase in which you went up, the rest of the boys seemed to be home. You heard loud whooping and yelling coming from the living room which happened to be right next to your exit. 

“Ah, Sehun! I was going to go and call you, but I saw you had the helmet outside your door,” You recognized Kim Junmyeon the quarterback. “Sehun what does the helmet mean?” I whispered to Sehun, your brows furrowed. He gave a dry laugh, “This is Y/N, you guys remember her right?” All twelve boy’s attention was on you. “How could we forget; she’s a great dancer, I’m Jongin by the way, but just call me Kai” He stood to shake your hand. “Call me Suho,” Junmyeon smiled warmly towards you. Soon enough they were all introducing themselves. “Okay well, it’s nice to meet you all, but I have to go back to the dorms,” You smiled shyly. They all seemed fairly nice. 

“Well we’re going to the Carnival that stopped in town, would you like to come with us?” Suho had offered you. “We’ll be upstairs,” Baekhyun and Chanyeol both left abruptly leaving you to start to wonder if you said something wrong. “What do you say Y/N would you like to join the EXO Boys for the day?” Kai smirked as he leaned against the door frame. “Um yeah sure,” You waved at them as you walked towards the door. “Sehun has my number so just message me with the details, I guess I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” You waved bye to them as they as well said bye in a chorus. 

...

“Well, what about this?” You held the hanger that held a yellow dress for Lisa to see. “Since you’re going to a carnival I think you should wear something like jeans,” She suggested. Lisa had put together for you a nude lace-up sweater paired with ripped jeans and simple sneakers. “Oh I wanted to tell you as well, Y/N, I may be transferring colleges after we finish up with this semester,” She grimaced. “Why?” You asked while applying the simple makeup. “My parents want me to go to YG University, they heard it was good.”

“Well until then, you’re still my co-captain for the team, and you’ll always be the co-captain of my heart,” You joked with Lisa to lighten the gloomy mood. “Ah, stop it, how cute!~” Lisa gushed. Your phone buzzed in your pocket.

From: Oh Seloser 

We’re about to pull up, be ready. 

You rolled your eyes at Sehun and said more to yourself, “Gosh, this kid is younger than me and he talks to me this way.” 

“Are they coming for you?” Lisa asked. You gave a nod as you grabbed your phone and money. “Yeah, don’t wait up for me Lisa, I’m not sure when I’ll get back.” She nodded, “Don’t worry I invited Yeri over to watch some movies on my laptop.” 

“Okay, bye Lisa!” You said while exiting the dorm area. 

...

“How fun is this going to be!” Kai exclaimed, his charisma was alluring. For most of the rides you had gotten on with Sehun, but for the rides he deemed too “life-threatening”  you had gotten on with Kai. Currently, you both were waiting in line with D.O. and Xiumin to ride the biggest ride the carnival had. “Ride of Death, that’s an interesting name,” You began to feel nervous about getting on. “Don’t worry Y/N I’ll be right next to you,” Kai assured you. His phone went off and he answered it only to give you an apologetic look. “Y/N, I’ll be right back, I’m going to use the restroom real quick,” He dashed off leaving you. You had made conversation with both Xiumin and D.O. the three of you laughing and joking together. “D.O. do you see Kai?” You were on your tippy-toes searching for the gorgeously tanned boy. “Sorry Y/N, but no.” You grew more and more nervous seeing that you all were next in line. 

Your heart was beating sporadically at the fact that you were getting on the ride alone. The worker guided you towards a seat which was right behind D.O. and Xiumin. Just as you were finishing to buckle up your seat, Baekhyun sat down next to you on the ride. “Byun Baekhyun?”

“That’s my name,” He nodded sarcastically. “Where’s Kai?” 

He shrugged, “I don’t know stomach bug maybe? He text me to come with you, so you’re not alone.” You weren’t sure how you felt about him being there instead of Kai, but nonetheless, you hung onto him for dear life throughout the ride. “Open your eyes Y/N!” Baekhyun’s laugh filled the air. You shook your head digging into his side further. He grabbed your arm reassuringly. “Come on, just open then, the view is great!” Slowly you peeled your eyes open and breathed heavily seeing everything fly by so quickly. “Now put your arms up and scream!” He grabbed one of your hands and put it up for you. Wearily you followed his example and lifted your arms into the air and screamed along with him. Towards the end, you were both laughing with one another. Once the ride came to a halt you smiled at Baekhyun, “Thank you, I probably would have spent the ride crying if not for you. And sorry about being so clingy.”  

You laughed nervously as you twiddled with your fingers. He shrugged nonchalantly, “It was no problem.”

“Hey guys Suho text in the group chat,” D.O. said as you all exited the ride. “He wants all of us to meet up at the Ferris wheel. 

The four of you headed towards the brightly lit wheel where the rest of the group had been waiting. When you saw Kai he profusely apologized for leaving you which you easily forgave him. Mostly everyone paired up to the three to a seat. Kris with Suho and Chen, Luhan with Xiumin and Sehun, Chanyeol with D.O. who had taken Kai away from you, Lay with Tao, then you and Baekhyun were left. “So...” You trailed off as you both went around the Ferris wheel. “I hear your dance team is doing well,” He said breaking the ice. 

You nodded, “Yeah Coach Amber Liu helps us out a lot.” He nodded with a small smile, “I wish I had enough courage to do that.” 

“Dance?” You questioned. He laughed and shook his head

“To be me.” 

“You seem like a good person now.” 

He nodded looking out into the view of the city, “Well that’s because I’m not pretending to be the popular player jock everyone thinks I am.” 

You looked towards him and he looked down at you, “I’m usually like this when I’m just around my them.” He motioned towards the rest of the boys. “Why can’t you be like this all the time then?” You questioned. “We all have our choices. Even in times when we don’t feel like we do. So, who cares what they’ll think of you if that’s what you’re worried about. You’ll still be our schools runner-back. Besides, why would you want to be with people who don’t accept who you are?” 

“You’re so pretty when you’re lecturing about something,” He grinned at you to which you cleared your throat. “Don’t you have a girlfriend?” You nervously laughed. He shook his head and dryly laughed, “I don’t know what I and Taeyeon are anymore honestly. I try my best to be what she wants, but she just doesn’t seem satisfied with that...”

“I’m sorry,” You told him earnestly. 

The ride came to a stop causing the conversation to also halt. Everyone in the area was leaving, so you guys went to a small dinner that had shakes and burgers. You laughed all night at the boy's antics they pulled. It was small moments like this that made you feel as if you now had a place in this world. Laughing till tears built up in your eyes and joking with the boys made you feel lively. Soon enough all of you were leaving the dinner paying and tipping the workers. You all had taken three cars, Suho driving with you, Kai and Sehun, while Chanyeol driving his jeep with Baekhyun, D.O., and Kai, then Kris driving with Luhan, Lay, Xiumin, and Chen. So as you exited the dinner you all went your separate ways. 

...

“Hm that’s kind of weird,” Lisa pointed out as you both stretched in the new dance room for the Vixens. You nodded, “I don’t know what to think about Baekhyun.” It had already been a week since the carnival. You, of course, saw the boys when you went to tutor Sehun, but it seemed as if Baekhyun had avoided you.

She sighed, “Well he seems like he’s into you. Maybe he was the one that called Kai to tell him if he could even ride with you?” 

You shook your head, “Maybe I don’t know.” 

“Well he’s asked about you before,” Lisa admitted. You whipped your head towards her. “What do you mean?” 

“He came in one day and asked if you were here, and you weren’t so he left,” Lisa shrugged. You sighed while wiping the sweat off of your forehead from the practice that was held a couple of moments ago. “I’m going to go back to the dorms, and maybe we should start filling out an application for the apartments?” 

“Well, what happens if you leave though? Who would I share the student apartment rent with?” 

“Well we already decided last time when we talked Selgui will be taking my place as co-captain when I leave, so maybe get to know her? She’s a really nice person, I’m sure you’ll really like her.” 

You nodded, “Yeah, gosh I’m going to miss you so much, Lisa!” 

She nodded to you with a smile, “Me too, well I’m going to go now. Don’t overwork yourself!” 

After you finished warming up you began to dance. You twirled and felt blissful. “You’re really good,” The voice clapping caused the smile to fall from your face as you were unaware of their presence. “Baekhyun?”

“Have you ever danced with a partner?” He asked. You shook your head, “I usually just dance solo or with the team...”

He unplugged your phone from the aux and put his own phone in. He played the song “Close” by Nick Jonas. “Do you know the dance to the song?” 

You nodded and took his outstretched hand. 

The both of you danced and you smiled at the finish. “Go out with me,” He told you. You laughed at him, “What would people think?” It was more of a teasing way since you knew Baekhyun did care about what those people thought while you didn’t. 

“This is me making a choice, and I’m choosing you.” 

#exo #exo scenarios #exo reactions #exo college au #exo smtown #exo fanfiction #exo suho #exo kim junmyeon #exo byun baekhyun #exo baekhyun #exo chanyeol #exo park chanyeol #exo chen #exo kim jongdae #exo kai #exo kim jongin #exo do #exo do kyungsoo #exo lay #exo zhang yixing #exo xiumin #exo kim minseok #exo oh sehun

[mylove-isnot-fragile]

Get To Know Me Better

I literally got bored and did this myself. 1: My name? Heather 2: Do I have any nicknames? My friends in high school used to call me Cricket. 3: Zodiac sign? Libra 4: Video game I play to chill, not to win? I don't play video games, but my husband loves them. 5: Book/series I reread? Harry Potter. Twice a year in July and Halloween. 6: Aliens or ghosts? Ghosts. 7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write? J.K. Rowling 8: Favourite radio station? Pandora? 9: Favourite flavour of anything? Chocolate. 10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great? Awesome. 11: Favourite song? Pretty much anything by Mayday Parade. 12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better? Which is better The Beatles or One Direction? (answer: The Beatles). 13: Favourite word? Serendipity 14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them? Yes. I'm a very forgiving person. 15: Last song I listened to? Three Cheers for Five Years- Mayday Parade 16: TV show I always recommend? The Walking Dead or Sons of Anarchy. 17: Pirates or ninjas? Pirates. 18: Movie I watch when I'm feeling down? Any Harry Potter movie. 19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song? I'm Still Standing- Taron Egerton 20: Favourite video games? Refer to question 4. 21: What am I most afraid of? Thunderstorms, clowns, or being alone. 22: A good quality of mine? I'm nonjudgmental and a good listener. 23: A bad quality of mine? I forget literally everything. 24: Cats or dogs? Dogs! 25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they're in? Norman Reedus 26: Favourite season? Fall. 27: Am I in a relationship? Yes. I'm married. 28: Something I miss? My son. 29: My best friend? Irl: my husband On Tumblr: @backstrcm @worthless---loser 30: Eye colour? Brown 31: Hair colour? Brown 32: Someone I love? My husband and my son 33: Someone I trust? My husband. 34: Someone I always think about? My husband. 35: Am I excited about anything? October! TWD, my birthday/anniversary, and I might get a dog! 36: My current obsession? Anything that has to do with The Walking Dead. 37: Favourite TV shows as a child? Anything Disney. I never really had a favorite. 38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? My husband or worthless--loser 39: Am I superstitious? Sometimes. 40: What do I think about most? My son. 41: Do I have any strange phobias? Reference question 21. 42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? Behind it. 43: Favourite hobbies? I guess I like to sing. 44: Last book I read? Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg 45: Last film I watched? Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 46: Do I play any instruments? No. 47: Favourite animal? I love dogs. 48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow? ??? 49: Superpower I wish I could have? The ability to manipulate others. 50: How do I destress? Netflix and food. 51: Do I like confrontation? Absolutely not. 52: When do I feel most at peace? When I'm asleep. 53: What makes me smile? Every time I see my son. 54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off? Off. 55: Play any sports? I cheered in high school. 56: What is my song of the week? Let It Be- The Beatles 57: Favourite drink? Anything alcoholic. 58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody? I don't think I ever have. 59: Afraid of heights? Somewhat yes. 60: Pet peeve? People who yell at others. People who judge. People who smack when they chew. 61: What was the last concert I went to see? Luke Bryan when I was like 17. 62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian? No. I like meat. 63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger? A veterinarian. 64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy? No. 65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of? Harry Potter universe. 66: Something I worry about? If I made the right decision for my son and financial worries. 67: Scared of the dark? No. 68: Who are my best friends? See number 29. 69: What do I admire most about others? People's ability to heal. 70: Can I sing? Yes, but I don't like to hear myself. 71: Something I wish I could do? Fly. 72: If I won the lottery, what would I do? Buy a house and pay for my son's education. 73: Have I ever skipped school? Yes. 74: Favourite place on the planet? Anywhere with my husband. 75: Where do I want to live? Seattle, WA 76: Do I have any pets? Not now, but maybe a dog soon. 77: What is my current desktop picture? The opening credit of Supernatural 78: Early bird or night owl? Night owl. 79: Sunsets or sunrise? Sunset. 80: Can I drive? No, it gives me anxiety. 81: Story behind my last kiss? My husband left for work. 82: Earphones or headphones? Earphones. 83: Have I ever had braces? No. 84: Story behind one of my scars? I used to self harm, but I've been clean for years now. 85: Favourite genre of music? Punk pop. 86: Who is my hero? My mom. 87: Favourite comic book character? Captain America. 88: What makes me really angry? When I mess up or do something wrong. 89: Kindle or real book? Real book. 90: Favourite sporty activity? I don't really like sports. 91: What is one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be? The conformation to gender neutrality. 92: What was my favourite subject at school? English. 93: Siblings? One brother and two sisters. 94: What was the last thing I bought? Food. 95: How tall am I? 5ft 3in or 160.02cm 96: Can I cook? No. 97: Can I bake? Yes. 98: 3 things I love? My husband My son I'm learning to love myself. 99: 3 things I hate? Ignorance. LGBTQA+ erasure. Racism. 100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends? It's about equal. 101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys? See previous question. 102: Where was I born? Georgia. 103: Sexual orientation? Not sure, but bi or pan-ish? 104: Where do I currently live? Georgia. 105: Last person I texted? My husband. 106: Last time I cried? Yesterday. 107: Guilty pleasure? Literally any kind of food. 108: Favourite Youtuber? MiniLadd. My husband watches him a lot. 109: A photo of myself. I'm on mobile. 110: Do I like selfies? Not really. 111: Favourite game app? I've been playing this Disney app on my phone for a while. 112: My relationship with my parents? Well, I never had one with my dad, but my mom is literally the best. 113: Favourite accents? I have a self proclaimed accent kink, so Cajun, British, like a really thick, deep Southern drawl. 114: A place I have not been but wish to visit? Seattle, WA. 115: Favourite number? My son was born on the 10th of May last year. 116: Can I juggle? No. 117: Am I religious? Do I believe in God? Yes. Am I religious? No. 118: Do I like space? Dude, space is cool. 119: Do I like the deep ocean? Dude, the ocean is cool. 120: Am I much of a daredevil? Not really. 121: Am I allergic to anything? Pollen. Spring kills me. 122: Can I curl my tongue? No. 123: Can I wiggle my ears? No. 124: Do I like clowns? Fuck no. 125: The Beatles or Elvis? Both? Both is good. 126: My current project? To better myself. 127: Am I a bad loser? Not really. 128: Do I admit when I wrong? Most of the time, yes. 129: Forest or beach? Beach. 130: Favourite piece of advice? "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." 131: Am I a good liar? Usually yes, but it depends on the person. Like, I can't lie to my grandma. 132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district? Hufflepuff. 133: Do I talk to myself? All the time. 134: Am I very social? Generally, no. 135: Do I like gossip? I shouldn't, but depending on the situation, yes. 136: Do I keep a journal/diary? No. 137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test? Yes. 138: Do I believe in second chances? Yes. Everyone deserves a chance or twelve. 139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do? Try to find the owner. 140: Do I believe people are capable of change? Yes. 141: Have I ever been underweight? No. 142: Am I ticklish? Yes! 143: Have I ever been in a submarine? No. 144: Have I ever been on a plane? Yes. Plenty of times. 145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family? I have no idea. She doesn't look a thing like me, but I like Blake Lively. 146: Have I ever been overweight? No. 147: Do I have any piercings? No. 148: Which fictional character do I wish was real? Literally all of them. 149: Do I have any tattoos? No, but I want some. 150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far? To love myself more. 151: Do I believe in Karma? Absolutely. What you put into the universe, the universe gives back. 152: Do I wear glasses or contacts? When I read for long periods or drive I wear glasses. 153: What was my first car? A 2012 Chevy Sonic. I still drive it. 154: Do I want children? I have a fifteen month old, so maybe in the future or maybe not. 155: Who is the most intelligent person I know? A man from my church. He's old, wise and knows really good math. 156: My most embarrassing memory? I don't feel like sharing 😳 157: What makes me nostalgic? The sound of a GameCube. 158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter? Plenty of times. 159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty? Brains. 160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe? Black. 161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience? No, but my godmother used to have them a lot. 162: What do I hate most about myself? My face and my "mom belly." 163: What do I love most about myself? My personality and my eyelashes. 164: Do I like adventure? Yes. 165: Do I believe in fate? Yes. 166: Favourite animal? Dogs! 167: Have I ever been on radio? No. 168: Have I ever been on TV? No. 169: How old am I? 21. 170: One of my favourite quotes? "You are braver than you thing. Stronger than you seem. And smarter than you think." Winnie the Pooh. 171: Do I hold grudges? No. 172: Do I trust easily? Somewhat. 173: Have I learnt from my mistakes? The best I can. 174: Best gift I’ve ever received? My son. 175: Do I dream? Yes. 176: Have I ever had a night terror? Nightmare, yes. Night terror, no. 177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind? The one I had last night where I met J.K. Rowling and instead of giving me her autograph, she handed me like five envelops for a free autograph and disappeared. 178: An experience that has made me stronger? Walking away from all the abuse I've endured. 179: If I were immortal, what would I do? Fall in love as much as I wanted. 180: Do I like shopping? Yes, but I hate trying on clothes. 181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do? Smoke a lot of weed because it's not legal here. 182: What does “family” mean to me? Family are those who love and support you under any circumstance without question. 183: What is my spirit animal? A sloth. 184: How do I want to be remembered? As someone who did her best with what she had. 185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose? I would love to learn to cook. 186: What is my greatest failure? Falling in love with someone I shouldn't have. 187: What is my greatest achievement? My son. 188: Love or money? Love. 189: Love or career? Love. 190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go? The 1920's. 191: What makes me the happiest? That moment when my husband comes home from work. 192: What is “home” to me? Wherever my husband and my son are. 193: What motivates me? People telling me I can't do something. 194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be? "I love you." 195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens? It depends is it like Toy Story aliens or E.T.? 196: A movie that scared me as a child? Not really a movie, but the guy's voice from the tv show, Forensic Files, used to scare the shit out of me. 197: Something I hated as a child that I like now? Pineapples. 198: Zombies or vampires? Zombies. 199: Live in the city or suburbs? The city. 200: Dragons or wizards? Wizards. 201: A nightmare that has stayed with me? I had a dream when I was like four that a clown was chasing me and I stabbed him with a knife. 202: How do I define love? Love is being able to be who you are around someone and being accepted and trusting them with anything. 203: Do I judge a book by its cover? No, but if I'm not interested within the first chapter, I won't read it. 204: Have I ever had my heart broken? Yes. Plenty of times. 205: Do I like my handwriting? Not really. 206: Sweet or savoury? Both? 207: Worst job I’ve had? I've only ever had one job and, so far, it's good. I shelve books at the local library. 208: Do I collect anything? No. 209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without? My wedding ring and Pandora bracelet. 210: What is on my bucket list? To meet my Tumblr family. 211: How do I handle anger? I burst into tears. 212: Was I named after anyone? Not my first name, but my middle name, Gabrielle, is after a doctor my mom had an affair with once. She thought his name was pretty. 213: Do I use sarcasm a lot? It's my second language. 214: What TV character am I most like? I would love to say Rory Gilmore, probably not. 215: What is the weirdest talent I have? I can make my ear make noise. 216: Favourite fictional character? Literally all of them.

[surveysonfleek]

212.

1. When you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? more cereal than milk so the cereal doesn’t get too soggy too quickly.

2. Do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a winter day? the first hit of cold is always nice. after awhile it gets annoying.

3. What random objects do you use to bookmark your books? nothing too interesting, random pieces of paper etc. or i’ll just fold the corner.

4. How do you take your coffee/tea? coffee: two sugars with milk. tea: one sugar and milk.

5. Are you self-conscious of your smile? i’m happy with my teeth, they could be a bit whiter though.

6. Do you keep plants? my mum loves plants, our backyard is huge and there’s gardens everywhere. there’s also some plants inside in the front lounge and then our dining room. none in my room, not enough sunlight lol.

7. Do you name your plants? no.

8. What artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? none. do tumblr surveys count?

9. Do you like singing/humming to yourself? only if i’m really into the songs.

10. Do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? side or stomach.

11. What’s your inner joke you have with your friends? there’s too many but one of the more recent ones is millus. there’s a guy at work named milos and it’s correctly pronounced ‘milosh’ but everyone says ‘mi-loss’ which is also fine. one of our workmates called him ‘millus’ the other day ever so innocently and we thought it was hilarious. so his name is millus now. lol.

12. What’s your favourite planet? earth.

13. What’s something that made you smile today? getting a new candle!

14. If you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? definitely loft style. huge space with high ceilings. our room would be open on like a second level and then everything on the first level would be studio-like, not many walls apart from the bathroom.

15. Go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! no.

16. What’s your favourite pasta dish? ugh i hate pasta. if i had to choose, probably gnocchi.

17. What colour do you really want to dye your hair? nothing in particular. wouldn’t mind some highlights. but my hair is super dead, it needs a break.

18. Tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. tomorrowland and coachella alwayssss come up in conversation. 

19. Do you keep a journal? What do you write/draw in it? nope.

20. What’s your favourite eye colour? hazel is always pretty.

21. Talk about your favourite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. hmmm i change handbags every year and they all go through hell and back with me lol. but i’d have to choose my hand carry luggage. that shit is super old, one of the zips are broken, the handle struggles to pull up but i still take it with me everywhere. one time i checked it in and it went missing. i thought it was the end of it but thankfully it was found and delivered to my front door lol.

22. Are you a morning person? nope. but if i have to wake up early i can do so easily.

23. What’s your favourite thing to do on lazy days where you have no obligations? i clean my room a bit, rearrange stuff, cook something new and watch netflix.

24. Is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? probably my boyfriend.

25. What’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? i don’t think i’ve ever broken in anywhere.

26. What are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? i have a lot of favourites that i’ll wear until they eventually break lol. 

27. What’s your favourite bubblegum flavour? watermelon.

28. Sunrise or sunset? sunset. but sunrises are just as beautiful.

29. What’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? when my boyfriend geeks out about certain things like game of thrones lol. loser.

30. Think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes, of course.

31. What is your opinion of socks? Do you like wearing weird socks? Do you sleep with socks? Do you confine yourself to white sock hell? Really, just talk about socks. i only wear socks when i’m wearing boots or sneakers or if it’s winter and my feet are cold. i own more black socks than white coz of work.

32. Tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with your friends. that’s what i call a dope games night hahaha.

33. What’s your favourite pastry? i honestly love all pastry.

34. Tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. What is it called? What does it look like? Do you still keep it? this cabbage patch doll. she was black with dreads and had a flower tee. my grandparents got it for me, not once did i think she was different coz she was black, i just loved her! i have no idea where it is now sadly.

35. Do you like stationery and pretty pens and so on? Do you use them often? i love stationery, i just don’t use them enough to buy heaps.

36. Which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? no idea. none right now.

37. Do you like keeping your room messy or clean? organized chaos tbh.

38. Tell us about your pet peeves! i could make an entire list. but my main one are people who cough without covering their mouths.

39. What colour do you wear the most? black.

40. Think of a piece of jewellery you own: what’s its story? Does it have any meaning to you? my diamond bracelet my boyfriend got me for my 21st birthday. i love it but it’s super flimsy, it’s broken twice now so i don’t wear it anymore.

41. What’s the last book you remember really, really loving? harry potter. all of them.

42. Do you have a favourite coffee shop? Describe it! starbucks.

43. Who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? i feel like i’ve never done this before lol.

44. When was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? ugh idk never.

45. Do you trust your instincts a lot? yes.

46. Tell us the worst pun you can think of. i’d tell you but it’s not very punny.

47. What food do you think should be banned from the universe? none.

48. What was your biggest fear as a kid? Is it the same today? dogs. haha no, i love dogs now.

49. Do you like buying CDs and records? What was the last one you bought? i don’t buy them anymore. i don’t even remember the last cd i got.

50. What’s an odd thing you collect? nothing weird.

51. Think of a person. What song do you associate with them? marc, get buck. so random.

52. What are your favourite memes of the year so far? haha idk. i like memes but not as much as everyone else on my facebook feed.

53. Have you ever watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show? Heathers? Beetlejuice? Pulp Fiction? What do you think of them? none.

54. Who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? omg this girl at work last night. no customer service whatsoever. i hope i don’t look like that.

55. What’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? idk lol.

56. What are some things you find endearing in people? just their dorkiness.

57. Go listen to Bohemian Rhapsody. How did it make you feel? Did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? i didn’t listen to it. but i do enjoy that song.

58. Who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? Why? this is incredibly fitting. sara is the wine mom 100%, and irene is the vodka aunt, she’s even russian ffs hahaha.

59. What’s your favourite myth? unicorns lol.

60. Do you like poetry? What are some of your favourites? no. the only time i ever read poetry was in school.

61. What’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? The stupidest one you’ve ever received? idk lol. there’s been plenty both ways.

62. Do you drink juice in the morning? Which kind? nope.

63. Are you fussy about your books and music? Do you keep them meticulously organised or kinda leave them be? not fussy at all. i used to be when i was younger. my itunes library would have all correct details and i managed to cut the genres down to under 10. now i don’t care. my books are everywhere too.

64. What colour is the sky where you are right now? black.

65. Is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? yes.

66. What would your ideal flower crown look like? white, pink and purple.

67. How do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? i love staying inside during those days.

68. What’s winter like where you live? it’s nice during the day and freezing at night.

69. What are your favourite board games? cranium. its an everything boardgame lol.

70. Have you ever used a ouija board? no.

71. What’s your favourite kind of tea? honeydew milk tea with pearls.

72. Are you a person that needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? no.

73. What are some of your worst habits? i get annoyed easily. i also have no patience.

74. Describe a good friend of yours without using their name of gendered pronouns. i am theirs and they are mine.

75. Tell us about your pets! he’s my first and probably last pet dog, sky. he’s sooooo cute and super old but he still has the spirit of a puppy. physically you can see signs of old age in him but i hope he’s okay.

76. Is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? nope.

77. Pink or yellow lemonade? neither. they’re too sour.

78. Are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? neither?

79. What’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? organized a present for me overseas. lol.

80. What colour are your bedroom walls? Did you choose that colour? If so, why? turquoise and light grey.

81. Describe one of your friends’ eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. striking.

82. Are/were you good in school? yeah i was good i guess.

83. What’s some of your favourite album art? all of rihanna’s shit.

84.  Are you planning on getting tattoos? Which ones? nope.

85. Do you read comics? What are your favourites? nope.

86. Do you like concept albums? Which ones? is lemonade one?

87. What are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? sound of music.

88. Are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? modern shit. cubism, futurism, surrealism, pop art.

89. Are you close to your parents? fairly close, yes.

90. Talk about one of your favourite cities. san francisco is a dream. it’s the first city my boyfriend and i ever went to overseas. i love it so much, i want to go back.

91. Where do you plan on travelling this year? this year nowhere, only coz i’ve traveled twice this year already.

92. Are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? it depends on the pasta and the cheese.

93. What’s the hairstyle you wear the most? ponytail.

94. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my boyfriend’s dad.

95. What are your plans for this weekend? no ideaaaa.

96. Do you install your computer updates really quickly, or do you procrastinate on them a lot? procrastinate, duh.

97. Myer Briggs type, Zodiac sign, and Hogwarts house? i forgot, sagittarius, ravenclaw.

98. When’s the last time you went hiking? Did you enjoy it? probably diamond head lmao. i hated it but the view up top was amazing.

99. List some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. noo.

100. If you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go five years into the past, the other five years into the future, which one would you press? Why? errr neither. i guess i’d lean towards going back though. i don’t wna miss all the things the next five years could bring me.

#survey #surveys #quiz #bored #questions

[lunatic-pudge]

I was tagged by the Local Loser (A.K.A @reimustein​) Thank you. I have other tag things to do but its taken me a while

Last: 1.Drink: Chocolate milk 2. Phone Call: Probably my father 3. Text Message: My sister 4. Song you listened to: Before I Forget- Slipknot 5. Time I cried: Can’t remember HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: Yes 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Nope 8. Been Cheated On: Nope 9. Lost Someone Special: Yes 10. Been Depressed: I wouldn’t say depressed, but yeah 11. Gotten Drunk and Thrown Up: Nope LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS: 12. Navy Blue 13. Forest Green 14. Maroon IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made New Friends:  Yes 16. Fallen Out Of Love: Yes 17. Laughed Until You Cried: Not that I know of 18. Found Out Someone was talking about you: Sort of 19. Met Someone Who Changed You: Yeah 20. Found Out Who Your Friends Are: I guess 21. Kissed Someone on your Facebook list: Nope GENERAL: 22. How Many Facebook Friends do you know in real life: I have no idea 23. Do you want to change your name: No, I like my name (Who else is named Brittanna, no one that I know of)

24. What did you do for your last birthday: I finally got that ice cream cake I desperately wanted for many months

25. What time did you wake up: Since it’s summer break for me and I like staying up late, so around 10 or 12

26. What were you doing last night at midnight: Youtube 27. Name Something you can’t wait for: Halloween 28. When was the last time you saw your mom: A few hours ago before she left for work 29. What is the one thing you wish you could change in your life: My height (Being 5′2″ sucks. Send help) 30. What are you listening to right now: Some random video of a guy complaining about Dance Moms 31. Have you talked to a person named Tom: No 32. Most visited website(s): Tumblr and Youtube

LOST QUESTIONS 33. Mole(s): Yes 34. Marks: I have a lot of scars and one burn mark (My scars aren’t self harm, but I did accidentally brutally skin my arm with my thumb nail) 35. Childhood dream: Animator 36. Hair Color: Brown 37. Do you have a crush on someone: I did, once 38. What do you like about yourself: My hair, I never realized how pretty it looked short 39. Piercings: I had my ears pierced before but they had to be taken out prematurely due to surgery 40. Blood type: I don’t know 41. Nicknames: Bri (My father call me Bob though) 42. Relationship Status: Forever alone 43. Zodiac Sign: Aquarius 44. Pronouns: She/Her 45. Favorite TV shows: American Horror Story, Chopped, Spongebob, Steven Universe, Kitchen Nightmares, South Park 46. Tattoos: None at the moment 47. Right or Left hand: Right 48. Surgery: I have had two oral surgeries, I don’t know if I had anything else 49. Hair Dyed A Different Color: My hair was blue at one point 50. Vacation: I’ve went to the beach, water park, other places and yeah 51. Pair Of Trainers: I use to have unicorn Converse and knee high Converse MORE GENERALS: 52. Eating: Nothing 53. Drinking: Chocolate Milk 54. I’m about to: Draw, maybe 55. Waiting For: Read 56. Want: Cookies 57. Get Married: I’d want to, in the future 58. Career: A doctor WHICH IS BETTER 59. Hugs or Kisses: Hugs 60. Lips or eyes: Eyes 61. Short or tall: Tall 62. Older or younger: Older 63. Nice arms or nice stomach: Nice stomach 64. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive 65. Hook up or relationship: Relationship 66. Troublemaker or hesitant: I like both HAVE YOU EVER: 67. Kissed a stranger: Nope 68. Had hard liquor: Nope 69. Lost glasses/contact lenses: Eh 70. Turned someone down: Kinda 71. Sex on first date: Nope 72. Broken someone’s heart: Yes 73. Had my heart broken: Nope 74. Been arrested: Nope, I’m a good noodle 75. Cried when someone died: Yes 76. Fallen For a Friend: In a way DO YOU BELIEVE IN 77. Yourself: Sort of 78. Miracles: Depends 79. Love at first sight: Yes 80. Santa Clause: When I was younger 81. Kiss on the first date: A cute little peck will do 82. Angels: Nope 83. Aliens: Nope OTHER RANDOM THINGS: 84. Current Best Friend’s name: Abbey 85. Eye color: Brown 86. Favorite Movie: Forrest Gump, Saw, Book of Life, Hellraiser 87. Hold an object dear to you: My old teddy bear, Snuggles and my year bears 88. Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Chocolate and mint chip 89. Least favorite thing: I could put all sorts of things but for now I’m gonna say peanut butter 90. Name one thing you could change about the world: Many things 91. Current Song stuck in your head: Time Warp (the one from Just Dance), and any Hatsune Miku song 92. Favorite Childhood show: Courage the Cowardly Dog, Little Bear, Blues Clues, The Upside Down Show, Miss. Spiders Sunny Patch Friends

@happy-pencil​ You wanna do this?

#Lunatic Complains #Lunatic Tags

[prussiumscribbles]

Glasswork

Arthur laughs, and the next thing I know, he’s wiping my glasses. He puts them back and stares at my face to make sure they’re not slanting. “There you go. That’s better.”

I push them against the bridge of my nose. “Thanks.”

He pulls his hands from the warm pockets of his jersey jacket and wraps them around mine. It’s hard to hate him when he’s like that.

I wish Arthur will let me sleep. I wish he’ll take me by the hand, drag me home, toss our clothes on the floor, and curl up under the sheets until the sun comes up. But he has other ideas.

Street lamps cast halos in the fog, which I’d describe as heavenly if I’m not exhausted from following Arthur around the city while he gets plastered at stupid o’clock in the morning.

“Hey, Alfred?” He looks above his shoulder, his words coming out with mist. His nose is red. “You alright, mate?”

I nod.

Arthur laughs, and the next thing I know, he’s wiping my glasses. He puts them back and stares at my face to make sure they’re not slanting. “There you go. That’s better.”

I push them against the bridge of my nose. “Thanks.”

He pulls his hands from the warm pockets of his jersey jacket and wraps them around mine. It’s hard to hate him when he’s like that.

“Did you enjoy the show?”

Three parties, two fucks, and a bajillion drinks later, I forgot we went to see a band we’ve been dying to see for ages.  

“Loved it,” I say, keeping my eyes on the floor, “Felt like Sziget all over again, don’t you think?”

He chuckles. “Well, this one was completely mental, but Sziget was something else.”

I feel his breath against my cheek as he leans close and wraps an arm around my waist. Summer last year, he and I went to a music festival in Budapest. There was a special kind of freedom then— it was our first time to travel outside England together. It was the kind of freedom that let us hold hands and kiss and be ourselves in public without being self-conscious.

The festival was electric. We sang and danced and jumped in the pit with a sea of strangers. From the lights to the atmosphere, it felt fucking awesome. Damn, I still get goosebumps whenever I think about singing back with the crowd. We were with everyone, and I was with Arthur. There was one point when we said, fuck it, and abandoned our tent to wander around the city. We booked a hotel room to drink and kiss and touch and lay naked, whatever felt good, until we were so hung over we missed our train to Vienna the next day.

“Where do we go now?” I ask.

He pulled away, stuffing his hands back to his jacket’s pockets, and walked two paces in front. “To my mate Gilbert’s.”

Of course, three parties aren’t enough. To be honest, I’d rather be at a concert where my arm will be around his shoulders, and his face next to mine.

Arthur’s in his element walking around in a black skeleton shirt and a skull painted on his face, which are an obsession he gets from watching too many horror films. I’m pretty sure I look like an overgrown toddler beside him with my wolf hoodie — I didn’t have the time to be excited about Halloween this year.

Half of the city’s still awake. Harley Quinns haunt the streets with their melted make up and baseball bats. A vampire awaits to suck on Fake Kylie Jenner’s neck in a café we’re passing by.

A bitter taste spreads on my tongue as we walk past a mile-long line of people waiting to be granted a golden ticket inside a high-end club. I can already taste the bile rising up my esophagus while watching these Halloween monsters— vultures— making out, smoking, picking up fights just to party and forget this night the next day and do it all over again next week.

If I’m thinking out loud, my friends must be giving me weird looks right now, saying, What’s wrong with you? Aren’t you Mister People Pleaser? People think I love being surrounded with crowds all the time, but the truth is I hate it. Nothing can make me feel terribly alone than being with mindless, alcoholic attention seekers. They will be the downfall of the 21st century, trust me.

What I’m saying is I love socializing— I do— but once it starts taking over your life, once you find yourself desperately blowing your money on your liquid lunch, Tequila Tuesday, or Whiskey Wednesday just to forget whatever shit you wanna forget, you’re becoming the loser here so you have to think twice… I don’t know, maybe it’s the alcohol talking, I don’t know anymore.

We keep walking despite being surrounded by vultures, whose hungry eyes follow us, working out if they can take us as their prey. And this is why I’m staying with Arthur. He may be an obnoxious little shit, but he’s still my best friend, so I can’t let the vultures have him.

I turn my attention back to Arthur who’s happily chattering away, whether I’m listening or not. His phone rings relentlessly inside his back pocket, but he ignores it. Sometimes, I’m not sure if it’s really him who’s acting or the powder he sniffed in the toilet. He did some at the last party, and didn’t forget to offer some as usual, but I declined. You’re no fun, he said and disappeared into the bathroom.

Lately, only drugs can put him on a festive mood. See, this is the person I’m using as an example, a warning sign— this is the person I never want to become.

“…and then, they had to run off because the police caught them drinking smoking weed in the park—“

His phone rings again and cuts off his thrilling monologue. “Oh, bugger off!”

“Who’s that?” I ask.

“Some guy I slept with two nights ago,” he tells his boots.

We’ve never been exclusive, really. We’ve established that a long time ago, I know, but that doesn’t mean I’m comfortable with the idea of other people taking him to bed. I don’t wanna hear about it I don’t wanna hear about it I don’t wanna hear about it—

“Why does he keep bothering you?”

He licks his lips. “He said he likes me,” he stares at his cracked phone screen as he finally types a message. “Can’t seem to get enough of me because, y’know, I’m mental.”

He chortles like it’s the funniest thing in the world and expects me to laugh with him. When he sees my straight face, he shrugs. “It’s what they like. They think, ‘oh yeah, I wanna be with a crazy person, they’re brilliant’. They think we’re all cliff diving, road trips at three in the morning, and all those exciting adventures. Hell, they’re bloody mental.”

The images send painful blows to my stomach. I don’t understand why Arthur would ever want to be around those people, but he seems to be pleased with the attention, so whatever.  

He pulls me inside Londis to get some canned beer. I open my mouth to protest, but he interjects, “It’s only cider.”

It’s only Tuesday night, Jesus Christ, how am I supposed to last until Friday? Late nights have been a terrifyingly familiar scene to me since university. Two years of binge drinking, and I feel like an old man already.

I’m tired and angry, but never with Arthur. I’m angry at the system, whatever it is that glorifies the self-destructive culture— getting wasted every night, being sleepless for reasons and depending on coffee or drugs to function, leaving people homeless or penniless… I don’t wanna be those people.

On the counter, I toss ten quid to pay for the two cans he grabbed for me, but Arthur will have none of it. I shrug and put it back to my pocket. I hear my favorite song from the speakers, one of those songs played on the show tonight. It thumps inside the walls of my chest, echoing with the images of the concert, the bouncing crowd, the dark, the lights strobing Arthur’s face.

“How can a song about loss sound so uplifting?” I ask as we step outside. The breeze slaps my face.

Arthur plucks a cigarette stick with his lips. “It’s called ingenuity.”

“Right.”

He thinks about it for a moment. “Well, it’s not just about loss, really. It’s about being happy in a sad situation, and sad in a happy situation… The ups and downs, and the moments of euphoria you get.”

The streets are getting more deserted now. We march to the park across us. Arthur lights his cigarette and takes a long drag, eyes staring at the dark distance.

“When I die, will you play it at my funeral?”

I comb my hair back with my fingers. “No.”

He nudges me in the rib. “What exactly is the use of you?”

I lift the muscles that make me smile, not saying anything else. We keep walking until we find a bench to support our weight. My cheeks are frozen, and Arthur is wobbling a little bit. We could’ve went inside a restaurant to have a proper dinner, but we’re both broke especially Arthur.

“Why don’t we go home? We can skip class and get shitfaced tomorrow at lunch,” I suggest.

“I see I’ve taught you well,” Arthur replies, a flicker of pride in his face. He’s the one who taught me how to be blind drunk at midday, and smoke my first cigarette. “But I need this right now.“

I open my canned cider and take a few gulps, hearing my stomach grumbling in protest. Cider isn’t really the best peace offering for your empty stomach.  

Under the street lamp, I watch Arthur’s face discreetly. His make up is wearing off. I can see the fresh gash above his left eyebrow from playing jiu jitsu, the sport that gives me an excuse to beat people without being jailed, he claims. No matter where he gets them, he’s proud of his scars and injuries— he’ll show up in class with a black eye from a bar fight the night before, and parade it around the campus as if he’s a fucking war hero.  

Beyond us, the city is slowly stirring for the next day. I glance at my watch; the Tube will start operating in half an hour.  

Arthur lies down the bench, the top of his head touching my thigh. “Hmm, this bench is not as horrid as I thought. I should probably get used to it by now.”

“I told you, you can always stay at my place. You have the key, right?” I tell him. “That’s the use of me, dickhead.”

He gives me a smirk that have always blown me away, either from admiration or irritation.

“Alfred, promise me one thing: don’t let other people tell you how to live your life,” he says. It seems our conversation has taken a turn and is passing through the deep forests of his mind. “Even if it means your family disowning you and your landlady throwing you out of your apartment because you can’t make the rent. Fuck all of them! It’s your life, you’re supposed to be in control of it. Nobody else.”  

He sits down again and downs his drink out of spite. Imitating the voice of his father, he says, “If only you’re like Allistor…” His face contorts with disgust. “If I’m like him, I’ll be six feet under by now too, for fuck’s sake! They can’t expect me to be like him. Suppose they prefer me blown up in the desert as well? I’d like to go my way, and on my own pace, thank you very much.”

“Arthur…”

I don’t know what to say. Under some circumstances, I’d have thrown my arms around him and held him and told him everything’s going to be okay.  

I can only make myself look at his face. The skull that gives an illusion of bitterness and danger, as if saying back off or you’ll die, is fading now, revealing his true face. Lonely and vulnerable. What little is left from his shattered pride after he was disowned. Just like the skull, the drugs are wearing off, and his problems are sinking in. Even the chemicals can’t dissolve the sadness in his eyes.

I gaze into them— those eyes that shine green, resembling sea-glass. I miss the bright spark in them, the way they did in Budapest, or under the Cornish stars where we camped and shared our first kiss, back when he was sincerely happy.

He blinks, tugging me back to the present.

“I’m tired of this…” He whispers as he turns away to hide his face. I’m staring at his back, and I can imagine his muscles rippling underneath his jacket.  

His phone rings again, and he answers this time.

“Hello?… Er, yeah… Alright, then… Fuck you!… We’re coming over… Right… I’m hanging up now, twat.”

He faces me with that smirk again, like he turned off his sadness for another night. Something bubbles in my chest. “Off to the Land of Free Booze And Food!”

I can’t find it in myself to refuse him (but when did I ever?). The bitter taste returns in my mouth as I find too many drunk people ready to sleep the day away. Almost everyone is half-naked— the girls on their skimpy crop tops or bras, the boys shirtless— and is either passed out or rubbing against each other, showered with booze. There are people in the kiddie pool, and there are some making out in the dark corners. Only a few people are standing by the food counter.

I tug at Arthur’s arm. “Should we head out? It looks like the party’s over.”

He bats his eyelashes. “Alfred, mate, if you really wanna go home, then go. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.”

No, you won’t.

He frees himself from my grip and finds his friends at the counter. I sit on a couch on the corner to sulk while he talks and laughs and flirts with his remaining early-morning energy. I take off my ugly wolf-head hoodie to glare at it. By the time he’s tipsy, he heads towards me, carrying a plate of fish and chips and cradling a bottle of beer in his other arm like a baby.

We pick on the food (I suddenly realize my hunger went away unnoticed), and Arthur liberates a pack of cigarettes from some poor dude’s back pocket. He offers and I take one stick. We sit like this contently for god-knows-how-long, the two of us occasionally laughing about something stupid, until he closes the distance between us and kisses me.

His lips are chapped but soft, too familiar from all the years they’ve pressed against mine. They find their way to my chin and under my jaw as his warm hands take possession of my skin. Arthur pounces at me with the force of a lion catching its prey, cupping my face, and grinding against me. With my back against the couch, I look around, alert. Nobody seems to care if we fuck ourselves silly in a stranger’s living room.

Arthur reaches down to unzip my jeans. He really can’t seem to close his legs tonight.

“Arthur,” I murmur, pulling away. “Arthur, we’ve had two already.”

His thick eyebrows knit together like I’m speaking Mandarin. “So what?”

“I’m tired.”

“I’ll ride you.”

“Jesus, Arthur.”

I wish he’d live like he’s made of glass sometimes.

He sighs and stands up with nonchalance. Spotting his new prey by the kiddie pool, he hollers, “Hey, Snake!”

Before he can take another step away, I tell him, “You never really appreciate anything I’ve done for you, do you?”

He snaps his head back to my direction, and confusion is written all over his face.

I give him everything I can, but it’s all a game to him. It seems like Arthur only uses me for pleasure, to make him feel good when he’s feeling miserable, and not really valuing our friendship.    

“I’m only good enough for fucking and passing time.”

My voice cracks a little in the beginning, but it turned louder and stronger, enough to draw anxiety on Arthur’s face. I assume he’ll black out the next day and ask about what happened. He always forgets this kind of night, but I refuse to make this one of those nights. I want to make him feel, and leave this feeling deep inside his heart so he won’t ever, ever forget. I’m doing my best for him because I care, but he pushes me over the fucking edge.

“You always play the victim as if you’ve never done anything to deserve every shit that happened!”

The house stirs. My words might have come out louder than I wanted. People are startled. What’s going on? say their faces. Some of them are too passed out to care.

“You’re right,” he replies. I’ve never wanted to wipe that annoying smirk from his lips so badly. “You’re only good for fucking and passing time. Hell, you can’t even fuck well! Why do you think I let other people take me home?”

My fists clench. This is what he wants, I tell myself. He’s pushing my buttons because he wants me to give him a brand new pain, the physical kind that will leave marks and fade in time. I’m not giving in to his dare.

I take a deep breath and count to ten. “You know what? I’m going home,” I say. “I don’t care if you’re coming over or not. I’m leaving.”

As I lay in bed, I listen to the cars passing outside my apartment and watch the stray lights paint the walls of my room. I twist and turn, reach for my phone and hesitate, then bury my face on the pillow. I blink my eyes a couple of times, trying to get rid of a thought gnawing at me, which is my last thought before I fall asleep. I remember expecting a call from a hospital or the police station concerning a certain Arthur Rafael Kirkland because his family refuse to acknowledge his existence.

The next time I open my eyes, daylight floods my bedroom, passing through the half-drawn curtains. I panic for a second, searching for my desk clock, but then I remember I don’t have class until 1pm during Wednesdays.

“Alfred…”

I recognize the figure sitting on the edge of my bed before I can put my glasses on. I look at him the same way I did at the park last night. There are no more traces of the skull make up, and I can see his face clearly now. There’s the gash near his left eyebrow, pinkish and healing fast. Relief bursts in my chest, knowing he didn’t get his face smashed in the few hours we weren’t together. Dark circles bloom under his eyes like two-day-old bruises, and his hair tousled. He looks awfully exhausted.

This is the person I don’t want to become.  

Perceiving my lack of response, he bites his lip and fidgets with his fingers. “I wish I hadn’t been terrible last night,” he says. “Forgive me.”

I wish I can say I’m not drawn into bad habits, but I am. No matter how far he pushes me away, I keep gravitating to him.

“Come here, you.” I envelope him into my arms, and he tenses for a moment, startled by the gesture. I hug him long enough for him to hold me too, and we kiss. The gentle, hesitant kind, not the hungry, aggressive one. He wraps his lips around mine, expressing what his words cannot. We let our mouths linger against each other’s skin, feeling warmth in this intimacy. We pull away and I tangle my fingers on the hair at the back of his head. I lean closer so our noses are touching, and I look into those green eyes.

Here is the person I never want to be. Here is the person I’ve allowed myself to love.

[Also on AO3]

#usuk #ukus #usuk fanfiction #ukus fanfiction #aph america #aph england #alfred jones #arthur kirkland #friends to lovers #angst

[thatcrazyfanfictionwriter]

Secret of the Sewers: Date Night

At Eastman-Laird University, students were bustling to and from classes. A few were just hanging out in the courtyard either shooting the breeze or playing on their phones. Among these students was April, who sat under a tree trying to study. However, her attention was fleeting as her mind kept drifting to her friends who were currently holed up underground. The smallest thing would remind her of them, from the smell of pizza, to a skateboarder, to one student carrying a turtle shell backpack. She was starting to become a bit depressed, burying her face in her text book and letting out a groan.

“I know students are supposed to get frustrated with school, but I didn’t think you’d be one of them.” a voice remarked.

April looked up to see Casey standing before her with a smirk on his face.

“Casey, hey.” she greeted, adjusting her glasses. “I’m not frustrated with school. I’m just… frustrated in general.”

“About the guys?” Casey guessed.

“Yeah…” April lamented. “I mean, every time I look up, there’s something reminding me of them, and the fact that they’re on lockdown for the sole reason of being different. It’s not fair.”

“I know.” Casey agreed, sitting down next to her. “I miss em too. I want nothin more than to pop down to say hi, but…”

“But we can’t for risk of getting tied to them or leading the police to their front door.” April muttered, slamming her text book shut bitterly. “Why does the world hate them?”

“Because the world is run by idiots who think anything different is gonna kill them.” Casey remarked.

“Right...” April grumbled, slumping against her tree. “I hate humanity.”

“Join the club. We got jackets.” Casey joked, nudging her.

April snorted slightly, lightly punching his arm. The two just sat under the tree for a bit, not really saying anything. Then Casey came to a decision.

“You know what?” Casey spoke up. “I think we need to take the day off.”

April blinked in response.

“Day off?” she repeated. “Casey, we still have classes to-”

“Forget classes.” Casey told her. “Considering the past few days we’ve had, we need a personal day. Besides, considering your perfect attendance record, you can afford one absence.”

“And what about your less-than-stellar record?” April challenged.

“I’m nowhere near the drop-out mark, and I’ve got A’s and B’s in all my classes.” Casey informed her. “I’ll be fine.”

“But-” April tried to protest.

“Come on.” Casey insisted “I think you could stand to break the usual ‘studious student’ routine, and have some fun for once. What do you say?”

April looked conflicted, glancing down at the stack of textbooks and assignments she had surrounding her. After a moment, she sighed.

“Alright.” she decided. “One day off wouldn’t hurt.”

“Great.” Casey replied, getting up and grabbing April’s hand. “Let’s go.”

…

A few minutes later, April was riding on the back of Casey’s bike, riding through the streets of the city.

“You hanging on ok back there?” Casey asked.

“Yes, I am.” she promised. “I just wish you’d tell me where we’re going.”

“You’ll see.” Casey replied. “But first, you hungry?”

“I never did get a chance to grab some lunch.” April admitted.

“Then that’s our first stop.” Casey declared, speeding off.

…

A few minutes later, April found herself at a Chinese restaurant Casey had found. Needless to say, she was pleasantly surprised.

“Wow, Casey.” She let out. “How did you find this place?”

“My mom used to bring me here for special occasions.” Casey answered. “They make the best pork buns, and their pan fried rice is the best.”

“Well, I guess I know what I’m ordering then.” April replied.

After the two placed their orders, the two just sat in minimal silence.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Casey asked.

“I wasn’t really.” April admitted. “I was just… off in la-la land.”

“Ah.” Casey replied. “Great movie, didn’t get the ending though.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.” April playfully teased.

“I know.” Casey replied.

April sighed.

“My mind keeps drifting to the guys.” she admitted. “Them… and that government guy we met.”

“Yeah, what was his name again?” Casey recalled. “Bishop?”

“Yeah, him.” April answered. “I guess I’m trying to figure out how he found out about the guys.”

“No clue.” Casey responded. “Maybe he’s got commandos scouting the sewers or something.”

“I’m pretty sure the guys would have noticed them.” April pointed out. “It had to be one of their topside adventures.”

“I guess so.” Casey agreed. “Maybe it was that whole thing with the four initials never to be said aloud.”

“Yeah…” April replied, flashing back to what happened at that place. “If I never hear those initials again, it’ll be too soon.”

“Then let’s not talk about it anymore.” Casey decided. “Let’s just focus on the rest of our day.”

“Right.” April agreed as their food arrived. “So, what do you have planned after this?”

“You’re just going to have to wait and see.” Casey told her. “Now let’s dig in.”

…

After their meal, they were back on the road. After a while, Casey began to slow down and pulled up to a local arcade.

“An arcade?” April asked. “Casey, since when are you a member of the arcade scene?”

“What? You don’t know everything about me.” Casey remarked. “You should see me crush it on Whack a Mole.”

“Alright Jones, you’re on.” April replied.

…

As they went inside, April was slightly taken aback by the abundance of sounds and bright lights emanating from almost every corner of the room.

“Guess you don’t arcade that much either.” Casey noted.

“I’m more of a library or book festival girl.”

“I’m sure we can find something here for you.” Casey reassured.

…

Their first stop was skeeball. April held the ball in her hand, looking down at the target intently. She then pulled her arm back then sent the ball rolling down the lane. It rolled up to one of the holes, dropping in easily.

“Not bad.” Casey remarked.

“It’s just a hundred points, Casey.” April replied. “It’s not that impressive.”

“Hey, it’s just the first go.” Casey reminded. “Let’s see if we can have a streak going.”

April just shrugged as she grabbed another ball and rolled that one as well.

…

After skeeball, April and Casey moved onto Whack a Mole, with Casey smashing away at every target that popped up and racking up massive amounts of points.

“Wow.” April remarked. “You’re weren’t kidding when you said you were a master at this thing.”

“Eh, I don’t like to brag.” Casey remarked, tossing her the stick. “Want a go?”

April looked down at the stick and then back at the game.

“Eh, why not?” she replied.

The game started back up, and she got to whacking. Her reaction time wasn’t nearly as Casey’s so she was a bit slow to hit a few. As the game ended, April breathed in and out, glancing at the score screen.

“What the… that’s not even half your score!” she exclaimed. “How did you get so good?”

“Practice.” Casey replied. “Lots of practice. Ready to move onto the next game?”

“And what would that be?” April asked.

…

“Seriously?” April let out. “Dance-Dance? You do realize I’m going to die on that thing, right?”

“If it makes you feel any better, so will I.” Casey promised. “At least we’ll both fail together, right?”

“I… suppose so.” April conceded.

He and April went up to the machine and placed their coins in, waiting for the arrows to appear on screen. The movements of their feet from that point were sporadic and aimless. It seemed like for every step they took on the pads, they were seconds late in the game. Despite their ever increasing speed, it seemed to do little for their in game performance. Finally, the song ended, and the two stopped to catch their breath.

“How’d we do?” Casey asked.

“76% completion.” April answered.

“That’s… not so bad.” Casey replied. “Right?”

“That’s a mid-C.” April reported. “Let’s face it. Neither of us can dance.”

“Agreed.” Casey concurred. “How about we try something else?”

“Sounds good to me.” April concurred.

…

Not that much later, the two were engaged in a heated game of air hockey.  The two were tied, with the puck flying back and forth between them. Both of them were determined, hitting the puck as hard as they could towards the others opening. With one major hit from April, she managed to bounce it off the side and into Casey’s hole before he could even move.

“Yes!” April cheered. “Finally, the hockey MVP is beaten at his own game!”

“I don’t know if this technically counts as ‘hockey’,” Casey remarked. “But good game regardless.”

“Aw, someone a sore loser?” April teased.

“A little.” Casey replied chuckling a bit. “Still, I’m glad to see you’re having fun.”

“I will admit, this is fun.” April allowed.

“See? Sometimes a day of reckless fun is all we need.” Casey replied before an idea popped into his head. “In fact… I think I know the perfect way to close this day out.”

April noticed the mischievous look on Casey’s face and immediately felt a twinge of fear course through her.

“I’m scared.” she said quietly.

“Oh come on,” Casey insisted. “I promise, you’ll love it.”

…

They arrived back at the school, heading for the gym. It was already late and the janitor was just making his final rounds. As he locked up for the night and headed off, Casey and April approached, intercepting him.

“Raul, hey.” Casey greeted. “It’s me, Casey.”

“Casey, hey.” Raul replied. “How ya doin, man?”

“Doing well.” Casey answered. “How’s that leg of yours?”

“Healing up just fine.” Raul replied. “No small part to you.”

“Eh, that Dragon was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and I wasn’t about to let him get away with knee capping you.” Casey shrugged off. “Listen, you think you’d be okay with letting me and April into the pool? We want to go for a late-night dip.”

“We do?” April let out.

“Alright, just be sure to clean up after yourselves and lock up when you’re done.” Raul told him. “And don’t go telling anyone else I let you do this. This is a one-time thing.”

“Can do.” Casey reassured. “Thanks man.”

“Anytime.” Raul replied, heading off as April faced Casey.

“Casey, are you nuts?” April asked. “We’re going swimming at this time of night?”

“Relax, we have permission.” Casey assured her. “Besides, I figured an indoor pool would be better than taking a dip in the Hudson. The water’s much cleaner.”

“Permission from a janitor is not the same thing.” April replied. “What if security finds us?”

“Again, we have permission.” Casey rationalized. “Now come on.”

He took her hand, pulling her inside. April nearly tripped over herself trying to keep up with him as they made their way through the building. Once they made it to the pool, Casey removed his shoes and socks, stuffing the latter into the former before setting them aside.

“Casey, are we really doing this?” April whispered.

“Just take off everything except your underwear.” Casey insisted. “That way, your clothes are dry when we leave.”

“I do not like this!” April hissed.

“It’s part of the reckless fun thing we’re going for.” Casey insisted, taking his shirt and pants off, leaving him in grey boxers. “Besides, what’s wrong with a little stupid fun every once and a while?”

“The part where we get caught?” April offered up.

“Didn’t I tell you we had permission?” Casey reminded. “Besides, I know what you’re really worried about.”

He took her hands, giving them a squeeze.

“We won’t get in trouble, we won’t get hurt, and I have no intention of doing anything besides swimming.” he assured her.

April paused for a moment, thinking about everything as she took a breath.

“Just… turn around for a moment.” She requested.

 Casey nodded as he turned around for April. She slipped out of her clothes, folding them neatly and setting them by her shoes.

“Alright, you can look.” April told him.

Casey turned back to face April, finding her in a sports bra and yellow underwear. She slid off her glasses lastly, setting them on top of her clothes.

“I can’t believe I'm actually doing this.” she let out.

“Well if it’s any consolation, you look great.” Casey complimented.

April smiled in response as Casey took her hand.

“Shall we?” He asked.

“Might as well.” She replied.

With that, the two leapt into the pool, causing a huge splash. They came up, both laughing a bit. Casey then playfully splashed April, cutting off her laugher. At first, he thought he’d messed up, until she retaliated with a splash of her own.

“Oh, you are so asking for it!” He challenged.

The two began splashing each other back and forth, laughing the entire time. After a while, they settled down, just leaning on the edge of the pool.

“Remember when we went to Northampton?” April asked. “Mikey found that old tree-house and the guys showed us that star drawings game.”

“Yeah, that was a ton of fun.” Casey recalled. “Almost made me forget why we went up there in the first place.”

“Yeah.” April agreed before an idea hit her. “Want to go to the shore and see what stars we can find?”

“Yeah!” Casey confirmed. “Let’s clean up and go!”

They got out of the pool, drying themselves off as best they could before grabbing their clothes.

…

Heading out to the shore, the two laid down in the sand, looking up at the stars.

“I see… a turtle with a spiky shell.” Casey let out.

“Nice.” April commented. “Bet Raph would be envious of that. I see… a platypus in a prom dress.”

Casey chuckled in response.

“So… still think going rogue today was a bad idea?” Casey asked.

“Nah.” April admitted. “You were right. We needed this. Your turn.”

“I see… the most beautiful girl in NYC.” Casey spotted.

April turned to Casey, who was just looking at her smiling. She blushed as red as her hair, fiddling with her sweater.

“Flirt.” she teased.

“Ain’t flirting if it’s true.” He teased.

He then leaned in and kissed her, the sounds of the waves the only sound that reached their ears as all their worries and fears melted away, with this moment being all that mattered.

[1312410]

50

For my 50th post, I’ll share 50 things I wouldn’t tell anyone but the internet: 1. I’m a failure with a good smile, and the smile isn’t lasting.

2. I wet the bed for way longer than normal; like 14, I think.

3. I’ve buried so much hate inside me and I’m terrified that it might be stuck.

4. My family is split between drug addicts and alcoholics, and I’m scared of which one I’ll become.

5. I’ve been in love with a girl for seven years, despite the blunt fact that we’ve been apart for five (and it was my choice)

6. I have definitely sang the song I wrote for her to other women, and it really fucked me up psychologically.

7. I’m pretty sure my grandpa thought I was an embarrassment when he died, and I’m not sure he was wrong.

8. Speaking of him, I was given his ring when he passed, and I’m certain he would be upset if he knew I had it.

9. I have drawn strictly depressing shit (neutral at best) for so long to the point where I literally cannot draw something with happy energy.

10. There have been times, plural, where I have been fucking somebody and when my eyes are closed, I just forget what they look like and I feel deeply guilty that sex is becoming to mean so little to me.

11. I think about death, specifically my death, a fucking lot.

12. The fact that I still hate so much, and with more in genesis, contradicts pretty directly with my wavering faith in God.

13(12410). I’ve watched my friends slowly realize I’m a real piece of shit and wilt away, until now where I have pretty much only one guy who has any faith in me.

14. I’m terrified of my grandmother dying.

15. I haven’t felt truly comfortable in anybody’s arms for many years, and I’m quite certain now it has nothing to do with them.

16. I listen when people give me advice, I just don’t really act it out. Which is fucking stupid. 

17. If I could go back in time, I would like to say I’d beat the shit out of me, though I’m not sure it’d help and I’m not sure I would win.

18. I have actively hindered my own progress in life, I think as some sort of punishment for how fucking shit I am.

19. I feel truly crippled when I am without a lover.

20. People see me as a very assured and direct person, but as my writing has probably hinted, I am lost.

21. I usually just lie to myself if it means I’ll get through another day.

22. I say I’m taking time off before I go back, but I don’t think I’ll ever attend university. Because I’m a fucking loser.

23. I’m honestly awful in any trade yet that’s where I’ve been investing my time.

24. I’ll lie to myself and say I’m capable if it means I don’t quit and wither.

25. I plunge myself into disasters so I have something to blame when everything inevitably goes wrong.

26. I have no idea how I’ll ever change.

27. The older I get, the harder it is to see myself letting go of my past.

28. I miss my fucking mom so much, but I’m too proud and too stupid to do something about it.

29. I’m pretty sure I only made an account on here so I didn’t explode and kill  myself this year. 

30. When I say pretty sure, I mean I was very close to just shooting myself not long ago.

31. Even though I made this blog for me, I feel both sorry and guilty for my three followers who have to scroll passed my constant shit vibes.

32. I don’t deserve to have any of the wonderful people around me.

33. I think I gave my (former) friend serious, scarring trust issues, and deep-running paranoia.

34. The part that really scares me about that is I truly don’t feel bad for him. Though, in my defense, he did turn out to be a pedophile anyway, so fuck that piece of shit.

35. Once my grandma is gone, if I lose my brother I will have nobody left worth hanging around for; pun intended. (neuce joke)

36. I don’t have any deep-rooted attachment to anything anymore, which is good to a certain extent I guess.

37. There are times when I’m walking at night where I’ll just scream and cry until I lose my voice.

38. I tell people I don’t mind the rain, I tell people I don’t need anything, I tell people I’m happy, I tell people I don’t miss much and I tell people a lot of other stupid shit. But I’m shattered on so many levels.

39. I’ve thought about it, and if I were in Germany during the Holocaust I wouldn’t be the hero of the story, and I’d probably be just as much of a piece of shit.

40. I wish there was a faster way to stop being so fucked up.

41. I sincerely admire you if you raised your family together, as I’ve only met around nine or so.

42. I used to be relaxed, almost to a fault, but now I just feel a broil in my chest and it burns. But I’m so fucking tired of being angry.

43. Even if I never have the balls to kill myself, at least my eating habits have already taken off at least a decade from my life by now.

44. I have seriously destructive tendencies.

45. If I can’t fix it, I usually end up breaking it more. (^)

46. Nobody in my life (except for my grandma) would apologize if they hurt me, so now in my adult life I come off as a real prick if I don’t apologize, or if I struggle to put it into words, when really it’s just because I don’t always know how.

47. I would love to write music with my brother, but because I’m so scared of sharing my actual self I will never get the chance.

48. I rap! (but who doesn’t?!)

49. I play strategy games because it makes me feel like I’m actually capable of achieving something for a couple hours.

50. Despite all this stupid, self-loathing shit I post, I gotta say: life is actually pretty okay. I’m realizing now that this is a good example of 24.

- 13.

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