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#smite Thor
theclumsyxeno · 2 years
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SMITE headcanons
When children with terminal illness are on the verge of passing, Thoth will appear to them, and soothe them as they pass, often reading them story books. Once they pass, he hands them to Anubis to guide the little ones
Thoth is a very good singer, but hides it. Feeling his talent is a waste of time
Thoth has a whole list of roasts that he has at the ready to use against foes
Ishtar and Artemis often have archery contests, with plenty of trash talking included
Thor and Loki after battles will do this: https://youtube.com/shorts/qMoA1o3lDyA?feature=share
If Jormungandr sees Thor and Loki doing their Middle finger battle he will straight up cancel Ragnarok and try again another day, not wanting to deal with the brothers’ pettiness.
Discordia is a big fan of Death Note, she has a huge collection of merchandise. Also, if anyone pisses her off, she threatens to write their name on the death note (even tho she doesn’t tell them it isn’t real, it’s about the F E A R)
Artemis often practices her archery, ensures he never misses a shot in battle (Although one time she missed and almost hit Achilles, that mans almost had Iliad flashbacks.)
Moth Man tourtures those who he considers deserve it, although he doesn’t discriminate what the crimes are exactly, or the age or gender. But he draws the line at children, feeling there’s no fun in harming them, no satisfaction.
Moth Man is weak to lamps, he just… S T A R E S. One time a victim escaped him by turning on a lamp and shoving it toward him. Needless to say, Moth Man was embarrassed and pissed at the same time
Anubis is gentle with children, protecting them when in danger, feeling they are too innocent to face death’s embrace. He understands what it is like to lose your innocence too early, as he went through that when Set killed his father figure, Osiris.
Anubis actually likes being scratched behind his ears, but never admits it (he feels he has an image to keep up)
Bellona often decorates her weapons during her downtime, etching Intricate designs.
Pele is a huge fan of Moana, often singing “how far I’ll go”, while dancing on lava pits
Kukulkan is deadly, but has a soft spot for children, but he holds distain toward cruel adults, not hesitating to spill their blood. He however, does recognize children who grew up into adults.
Kukulkan is able to perfectly guess the future, and this often makes it hard for anyone to surprise him, as he catches them lacking before they can do anything.
Bastet actually likes to knit, and makes her father and many other heroic gods scarves and the like, although she struggles with not trying to play with the yarn as she does
Isis is a very good cook, and always makes sure Horus eats well before he goes to do battle
Tiamat is very motherly, and surprisingly gentle to small children, especially orphan ones, some of them reminding her of her children she lost.
Cerberus loves it when Persephone gives him pets and scratches, he even rolls on his back so she can give him belly rubs. Although if any mortal catches him in this weak state, he can and will make their death 20xs worse than it would’ve been had they just stumbled to the shore.
I will add more as time goes on
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lovevalley45 · 29 days
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i think there’s not enough hammer wielding paladins. smiting with a hammer is just too cool
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demon64 · 1 month
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A while back I posited the idea of Darksiders crossovers into other games, and it just struck me that I did not mention a game that I could totally see the Darksiders characters as character skins in.
SMITE.
Death: At first thought it's obvious who Death could be a skin for Thanatos. I will posit another idea however... Set. Both Death and Set got the acrobatic combat with a staff or scythe, and some of Set's abilities are similar to what Death can do.
Strife: I'm thinking Apollo, just instead of finger guns it's actual guns. Or maybe Loki, considering Strife is the more mischievous of the Four Horsemen and has more Trickster like abilities in Darksiders Genesis.
War: I guess maybe Ares or Tyr, whichever works a bit better. I'm leaning more towards Tyr since what I remember of game play it looks like stuff War can do.
Fury: the only one that comes to mind is Bastet, since I'm pretty sure both use whips as weapons. Or maybe as a skin for Sol, considering Fury's Flame Hollow. Or maybe even Hel.
Azrael: maybe Charon, I don't know, I'd have to look through the list of Gods for SMITE. Or maybe as a skin for Chronos?
Samael: Chernobog comes to mind first, along with maybe Surtr or Thor.
Uriel: that's kinda easy... Bellona. Or maybe Nike or Nemesis
Abbadon: Odin might work?
Ulthane: who else but Vulcan? Dude fits as a skin for Vulcan pretty well if I say so myself. Also could probably work as an Ymir skin, I think.
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laurits-enjoyer · 1 year
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Some days I'm like-
You know what? I'm finally over Loki. It's fine. It's been more than 6 years that I've known and loved this character. And finally I'm over it.
And then I open this fucking app and see 1 (one) gif. 🥲
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horizonjv · 2 years
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Thor (Smite)
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epic-and-kitty · 4 months
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Shit My DM Says
"I said I wanted to see A war crime, not you guys trying to speed run the Geneva Convention"
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taking-thyme · 1 year
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My experiences with my Deities so far
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Apollo: I’ve found that Apollo just likes to show up and sit with you places. It’s his way of checking in on you. One of my friends actually did a tarot and pendulum reading for me and Apollo apparently recognized me as one of his children which, like, holy shit dude. But seriously, Apollo is super loving. He’s always just kind of around, either because you feel his energy or you see crows and ravens basically everywhere. He also has a very protective energy, I feel like he would get super mad if any of his devotees are mistreated, which definitely fits with his myths. It’s super cliché but the only way to describe how you feel with connecting with him is sunny. My body feels a lot lighter and almost like it’s glowing, and I feel more at peace. This applies to most deities, but you really get the sense with Apollo that he wants you to feel good and he’ll do whatever he can to make that happen. Also he’s fuckin gorgeous. And he really likes apples for offerings, he always asks for them. 
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Artemis: Artemis has such a cool energy. I feel like she’s that badass older sister that leans against walls and gives really damn good advice. When I connect with Artemis I just feel way cooler than before, like I can take on anything. Like I could fight any man and win. But don’t get me wrong, she definitely has a softer side. She’s adamant about me taking care of myself and doesn’t want anything bad to happen to me. I deal with a lot of terrible anxiety, and she’s always super reassuring that nothing will happen to me and if it does, she will smite something. Artemis gives me confidence. I also feel really called to help wildlife when I connect with her, which is fitting of course. She has some of the most protective energy out of all my deities - they all love and protect me of course, but Artemis is the most adamant about it. Probably because she knows that helps with my anxiety. I don’t know man, she’s just so badass and supportive and reassuring. She also likes apples. I also get the vibes that the Greek Gods can be a little more vague with their answers than the Norse or Celtic pantheons, but not in a bad way, just in a “you need to figure this out yourself” way, which I can respect and appreciate. 
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Cernunnos: Has an incredibly wise and ancient energy. I've found he's very clear with what he wants during tarot readings, he will tell you exactly what you need to work on and do. Cernunnos is also very adamant about self care, probably because I don't do it enough, oops. He has this rule where, if you take something from the earth, you must give something back. Like when you pluck a flower, say thank you or water the ground where it stood. It takes a bit to get into the swing of doing that but you'll have such a better relationship with the land once you do. Whenever I connect with him I feel so much calmer and level-headed than usual. He's also very insistent that I meditate more often. 
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(He wanted me to use this picture lmao I love him)
Thor: 100% the deity I feel most casual with. Every time I make an offering or connect with him, I immediately feel so much more chill and laid back. We make jokes with each other a lot. Also he's the biggest hype man of my entire life. If there's a major life event going on, he will send a storm or some thunder to let you know he's with you. At my High School graduation there was a lightning storm in the distance and on my last day of school he sent me a truly apocalyptic looking storm to show his support. Also, and I don’t know if this is just me, but Thor is also a massive flirt. He will compliment you and likes to be flattered right back. That seems to be a running trend with the Norse gods, they like being flattered. But they, and especially Thor, absolutely return the favor.
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starrose17 · 4 months
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What If... 1602 Loki has such a Prince Charming Shrek vibe (with Wanda as his bestie)
In fact the whole thing has a Shrek vibe, I mean look at these quotes from Shrek and tell me you do not see it in your head:
Wanda: Is that glitter on your lips?
Loki: Mmm, cherry flavored.
Wanda: We have to go. I have to do Loki's hair. You know, he's all high in the front but he can't reach the back. He always needs someone to take care of the back.
Loki: Oh, thank you, Wanda darling.
Thor: [waving his sword] "Where is he ? I shall render his head from his shoulders! I will smite him where he stands! HE WILL RUE THE VERY DAY HE STOLE MY KINGDOM AWAY FROM ME!"
Loki: "Oh, put it away, Thor."
Loki: "I mean, how good looking could this Rogers Hood guy be anyway?"
Wanda: "Are you kidding?! He's gorgeous! His face looks like it was carved by angels."
Loki :"Hmmm -- he sounds dreamy."
Loki: "Thank you, gentlemen. Someday I will repay you, unless of course I can't find you, or if I forget."
Thor: [sarcastic, to Loki] "Those are some nice leotards."
Loki: [genuinely happy] "Oh, thank you."
And tell me Loki has never done this:
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Just let him do his plays:
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treetreader · 1 year
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Hail Thor! Mighty protector of Midgard!
I ask thee to guard the trans community
Keep them safe from harm and injustice
May all who intend us harm feel the smite of Mjolnir at your hands
Hail Loki! Master of illusions! Changer of being!
I ask thee to give strength to the trans community
Lend us your gifts of cunning and trickery as times turn sour on us
Be with us as we forge our way to a new day
May all who wish us harm feel you pulling the strings to foul their lives
Hail to thee O Thunderous One!
Hail to thee O Master of Half Truths!
Safe travels and safe returns, my friends
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warcrimetime · 14 days
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Havi is a brass dragonborn with a knack for reading the weather. She loves independence, gathering herbs and trapping. Havi was raised by two bards and while she's good at piano she's a bit shy. Don't worry though, her piano is in her bag of holding and both the instrument and the chair have wheels for adventures! Havi loves her god, Thor, and hopes with his strength she can smite and heal.
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notinthislife50 · 9 months
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Chapter 17
Previous Chapter
Next Chapter
Meanwhile, back at the compound, John entered the kitchen where the Avengers were sitting.
“You know John if I’d known you were coming I’d have rolled out the red carpet or at least made more pancakes.” Tony jabbed.
“Thanks, Stark but not necessary” John nodded and Tony rolled his eyes.
“As I’m sure you all know my beloved wife is missing and I’m very worried,” John rambled “and I believe she may have come here.”
“Why would she have come here?” Steve asked.
“Ah, my hero!” John smiled “You know I hope I’m filling up those big shoes of yours,” he smacked Steve on the shoulder.
“Hardly,” Bucky snorted making Natasha smirk.
“So yes to answer your question my wife has had some troubles lately. She thinks everyone is trying to kill her. She isn’t well. And I need to get her back home so I can take care of her.”
“Well she isn’t here,” Tony said, “You’re welcome to search the place.”
“Oh, believe me, my people are Stark,” John smiled.
You stood in a large room briefcase clutched to your chest. Thor stood beside you. A woman entered the room. The most beautiful woman you ever laid eyes on. You couldn’t help but watch her every move.
She stopped at Thor and took his face in her hands and smiled “Son you’re back. Thank the gods” she smiled. She then looked at you and you lowered your head immediately “Y/n please don’t be afraid to look at me, I know all about you, and you are safe here,” she tried to comfort you. “No one can reach here,” she confirmed.
All you could do was smile and nod. Wanting to believe her but at the same time not. What wouldn’t you give to trust someone. You thanked her meekly and then the ladies were ordered to show you your room.
You had been on Asgard for a few weeks but you always kept yourself to the room you were assigned. You were out of your depth here, how could you escape a God? Fuck why did you agree to this? But somehow Frigga sensed your fear. Every time you felt a panic attack coming on she seemed to appear and slow you down.
One day Odin announced a ball for some celebration. You were glad, it would mean no one would come near you for a while. You could have peace. Until Loki entered your chambers, you could never help but laugh any time he strutted in.
“Must you?” He would always ask faking annoyance.
“Most definitely yes, when you walk in like this” you laughed mimicking Loki.
“Okay little human sit down before I smite you” he warned.
"You love me, you could never do such a thing,” you smiled.
It’s true, Loki ignored you at the start, Midgardians were beneath him, then he had a conversation with you and he became intrigued by you. Now he had actually made friends with you. He was sure you were a witch. You obviously did some spell to make him care about you.
“Loki,” you said smiling always happy to see him. You flung one arm over him and hugged him. “Come tell me a new story,”
You were infuriating, acting like a child making him tell you stories of old. He would never admit it but he liked it.
“Must we little human, It’s so tiresome,” he groaned unconvincingly.
You smiled brightly “We must, I love it when you teach me things Loki,” You patted his shoulder, giving your best sad eyes.
Loki pretended to huff “I’m glad the gods never graced me with a sister.”
You poked him stating “You love me,”
“I am a god, we don’t love” he jested.
After the story he looked at you “Y/n,” he said I bit too serious for your liking “We want you to come to the ball.”
“Loki, please I can’t,” You started to panic and then took control of yourself.
“Anyway, I have nothing to wear and I don’t think anything would match my beautiful bracelet” you laughed raising your arm with the suitcase attached.
“Little human, you know Thor would only have to put his hammer on this suitcase and no one would ever be able to lift it. We could even do it in the grand room, so you could have an eye on it at all times.” He tried to convince you.
Then Thor had walked In and the both of them together tried to prove to you it would be safe.
"Please Y/n, I really need the most beautiful woman to dance with at the ball” Loki worked his charms.
“Okay,” You rolled your eyes.” You don’t need to try and feed my ego, I don’t have one.”
Thor and Loki tried to interject. But you raised your hand " I’m not looking for compliments they make me uncomfortable. Just bare with me and my trust issues. But I will try it.”
Thor clapped his hands while Loki just remained the same. But you swore you saw a hint of a smile.
@kandis-mom @silverfire475 @rivthejellyfish
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doodlesdreaming · 1 year
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Ok now I gotta send this one, because your wedding ask from someone else got me thinking about this one, hehe.
We all know the story of how Thor's hammer got stolen and he had to dress up as Freya in a wedding dress to get his weapon back. Leading to hilarious shenanigans where Thor almost gives himself away, and Loki makes sure to cover his ass constantly. Ending in the giant who stole the hammer getting killed once Thor gets his hammer back.
Which of the three brothers has their weapon stolen, who is made to dress up, and who gets the Loki position in this story? We all know this had to have happened at least once. Fury probably gets Freya's position in this story. Being told some schmuck demon or other wants her as a bride, to which she vehemently declines and nearly beats the crap outta whoever asked. Freya did indeed beat up Loki for a bit just for asking. However this turns out, I'm expecting pure hilarity.
Hands down, it's Chaoseater that gets stolen. And by some headstrong demon, who only wants the best of the best(in their opinion). They're willing to make a trade of course, one treasure for another. A sword in exchange for the last female nephilim in existence, as they're bride.
Fury is all too ready to smite the creature down for purely suggesting the idea of marriage, but to her, and everybody's surprise, Death agrees to the trade and makes preparations with the demon. Naturally, his siblings want answers, and to tear open his head to see if his brain has gone missing. But the eldest leads them away and into a huddle to discuss his plan. Slowly, the faces of the three turn from angry frowns to wicked smirks.
Fast forward towards the actual wedding ritual(we are talking about demons here). Fury comes in, wearing a rather revealing get-up with her face covered by a veil, and Strife and War walking beside her. The demon in question, looking very proud with Chaoseater in hand, surrounded by an army of their followers, is more than eager to be one with their new bride. The demon priest recites the ritual rights, blah blah blah, now they may kiss the bride.
The demon takes her by the hand and lifts her veil, only to be staring at a white bone mask that somehow looks incredibly p*ssed off. The last thing he hears, was his "bride," whispering, "Til death do us part," as they are gutted by twin scythes. War, taking back Chaoseater from the corpse, jumps into a fray of angry demons along with Strife, and slay everything in sight. The priest, Fury in disguise, laughs at the sight as she turns to her brother in admiration,
"You were right, Death. This turned out to be very entertaining indeed."
"The entertainment has only just begun, Fury. Shall we then?" Death, still in the dress, offers his arm to walk Fury down the aisle and into the heat of battle, "Let us make sure Hell itself learns to not trifle with the Horsemen."
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sigyns-drafts · 5 months
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▷∙∘Mastlist∘∙◁
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Norse mythology
Odin
Frigg
Fulla
Baldr
Hodr
Hermodr
Nanna
Hoenir
Jord
Thor
Sif
Thrud
Magni
Modi
Jarnsaxa
Loki
Angrboda
Sigyn
Fenrir
Jormungandr
Hel
Njord
Skadi
Freyja
Freyr
Gerdr
Eir
Lofn
Sjofn
Saga
Sol & Mani
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Snv/RoR
Odin
Thor
Loki
Heimdallr
Brunhilde (including all Valkyries)
Hermes
Hercules
Aphrodite
Hades
Shiva + his wives
Rudra
Anubis
Lu bu
Adam & Eve
Kojiro Sasaki
Jack the ripper
Buddha
Qin
Apollo
Poseidon
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Smite
Maman Brigitte
Amaterasu
Anhur
Anubis
Ao kuang
Aphrodite
Arcane
Ares
Athena
Artio
Awilix
Baron samedi
Bastet
Ballona
Cernunnos
Chaac
Chang e
Charon
Cu chualinn
Da ji
Discordia
Erlang shen
Eset
Fafnir
Freya
Ganesha
Gilgamesh
Guan yu
Hantchiman
Hades
He bo
Heimdallr
Hel
Hera
Horus
Hou yi
Isthar
Iz chel
Izanami
Janus
Jormungandr
Kali
King Arthur
Kukulkan
Lancelot
Loki
Maui
Medusa
Merlin
Morgan le fay
Mulan
Neith
Nike
Nox
Nemesis
Nu wa
Odin
Olorun
Osiris
Pele
Persephone
Poseidon
Ra
Rama
Sequet
Set
Shiva
Sol
Skadi
Sobek
Sun wukong
Surtr
Susano
Terra
Thanatos
The Morrigan
Thor
Tiamat
Tsukuyomi
Tyr
Ullr
Vulcan
Xbalanque
Yemoja
Ymir
Yu Huang
Zeus
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Ror!Thor x Fem!Sif reader(A kiss under the evening sun)
Ror!Hermes x NB! Human reader (Enchanting music of the night)
In whistling spirits can be growth (Hades x Persephone)
With an Honorary status, beware the rubble (Odin, Loki, Sigyn, Angrboda)
The unlikely jackal-headed companion (Ror!Anubis x fem!reader)
Bonding by the Nile (Smite!Sobek & Neith)
With parental aid, my cycle's dread will fade (Hel!Reader with Loki and Sigyn)
Slumber in the Divine Boardroom (Gn!Reader x ror!Hades x Buddha x Loki x Poseidon)
Secret crushes and seashells (Ror poseidon x oc)
You remind me so much of him (ror buddha x fem!reader)
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professional-termite · 6 months
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What was the thor dream about?
oooh this one was FUNNY.
basically, the dream started off and i was watching a soap opera. it had a gay kiss in it, and my first response was to scream "HAAAA WE HAVE MORE GAY REP THAN THE MCU".
suddenly, i was engulfed in a rainbow, and when i opened my eyes, odin had transported me to asgard using the bifrost. apparently i had committed some kind of crime. i was really mad so i started killing everyone, and it turned into a gta 5 police chase, 5-star system and everything, and i killed all the asgardians, including odin, except for loki, who was in a tree.
i took the bifrost back to earth and landed in germany, because i was friends with sam and bucky who had apparently gotten married and moved to germany together. when i got down, sam and bucky were walking on a bridge together, and i think they wouldve been holding hands except bucky had none. he was kicking a basket of groceries down the street and sam did nothing to help.
i quickly explained my situation to sam, who immediately abandoned bucky to lead me to a secure fortress. he was like "yeah no one will get you once youre in here!" then thor flew out of the sky like "bro you killed my family. prepare to die"
i was like "ok getting smited by thor is a pretty cool way to go" and he was like "youre right. too cool for you" and he strapped a bomb to my forehead and it started beeping, and i woke up before my head could explode
the bomb was the sound of my alarm clock.
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mahariel-s · 5 months
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i think one of my problems with the direction they went with thor in the mcu is that they decided the asgardians actually acting like a royal family of alien gods was cringe and tbh that sucks. it's like the appeal with superman is that he's so intensely good and he's from another planet, it's appealing and why we love the character. right??? when people write evil superman or even shitty jerk superman we roll our eyes 'cuz it's like ok...
with thor we love that he is so different, so enamored with midgard, its humans, cultures, and customs, and tries to embrace it while still being, you know, "I will smite Thee!" and having an air of like, other-ness that could never really be diminished...idk....i'm really rambling but like the mcu thor movies were like "honestly, talking like that is cringe, we're gonna give thor the funny main marvel lead hero makeover" and started giving him cheap one-liners and stuff to make the audience laugh to forget the bad writing. and it sucks
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wearepaladin · 2 years
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Does it bother anyone else that Divine Smite is only able to be done with melee weapons? What if I want to play a different sort of Paladin that's not a tanky dude/dudette wielding a sword or axe? What if I want to pull an analogue to Link and turn my arrows into Divine Smited ones to vanquish evil? Or my character is from a culture where swords or axes aren't as common but spears are and I want my Divine Smited spear to come down from afar like a divine bolt from the heavens? What if I want to imitate Thor and throw a Divine Smited hammer at my foes instead of smashing it directly into their faces up close?
If there was an explanation like, "From the time you can pull out your bow, cast that, release the arrow and have it hit, that takes too long and the divine magic fades mid-flight to become a normal shot again, so that's why we have to stick it to melee because it's faster", I'd begrudgingly accept that. But there's no explanation I can find! Just RAW says no, and it bugs me.
It's bothered me and a few others before in critical moments before as well.
But there is a logical explanation, just not necessarily a fun one.
GAME MECHANICS.
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