beelsfridge - Tumblr blog

beelsfridge · 9 months

Text

My Eldest Brother (But He’s My Father) Pt.2

Triggers/Tags

Mentions of Child Neglect/Jealously/Hurt/Comfort/Hate/Depression/Father&Son/Thoughts of Death/NoMC/Panic Attacks/Some Flasbacks/Kid!SatanHeadCannons/Mammon is a good big bro/self deprecation/ identity crisis/ mentions of an attempt

Notes: Colored Text is just Dialogue with a bit of glam !

Italicized words are flashbacks (usually)( but it’ll be obvious when it’s not!)

Per request, here you go! Part 2 🫶🏼 @zarakem

1/2/?

Satan can’t help but feel the rage boil in him during a school festival at the sight of Lucifer.

But there’s another feeling lingering as he stares at the kindness and gentle expressions Lucifer shares with the someone so small.

Ones he never saw growing up

When Satan realizes that he yearns and longs for something he can never have.

তততততততততততততততততততততততত

Satan pants heavily as his consciousness begins to take over.

He looks around, his vision blurred.

He’s not at the festival anymore.

Where is he?…

He feels a bit sore, and his hands have clear signs of bruising and scrapes. But it was obvious someone tended to some of his wounds with some bandages wrapped around his body.

He lets out a sigh.

He did it again, didn’t he.

He went crazy.

His back hurts despite being on what he assumes is a bed.

He tries to move from his place but his hand is chained.

Not this again…

He looks around him, his vision becoming clearer.

Is it still the day of the festival? How long has passed?

He’s in his room.

But he finds no comfort in being in it.

He tries to break free from the chains in a desperate manner but fails.

He knew it wouldn’t work anyways

Why was this happening to him again?

He had it under control, did he not?

He feels defeated.

He doesn’t know how long he’s just sitting there. Drowning in his own sorrow.

That’s when the door to his room opens. The light blinding him as he averts his gaze from whoever decided to walk in.

“Hey buddy.” Mammon gleams as he holds a tray of food ,”How are ya feeling?”

Satan shoots him a dirty look but that doesn’t stray Mammon away from fulfilling his duty.

“Tch, I told Lucifer these weren’t necessary.” Mammon looks at the chains with detest before refocusing on Satan,”I brought ya food! You must be hungry, right?”

“No.” Satan tells Mammon before his own stomach betrays him.

Mammon can’t help but let out a snicker to which Satan responds to with a scowl.

“Open wideeee Big Brother Mammon is gonna feed you! Just like he used to!” Mammon tells him shoving a spoonful of soup into Satans mouth.

“Beel must’ve made the food today.” Satan assumes as he has no choice but to accept Mammon.

He’s always been too pushy and would’ve probably continued insisting if Satan rejected him again. He’s much too tired and sore to argue anyways.

Mammon reminds Satan of Lucifer in a way.

But at least Mammon doesn’t get angry like Lucifer does. He’s a lot more understanding.

And caring.

He’s more gentle.

Sure he’s an irresponsible idiot who always manages to get into all sorts of trouble but …

Mammon has always been kind to Satan.

Even if Satan had his outbursts and destroyed everything.

Mammon would forgive him right away.

Satan can’t help but feel some guilt weigh him down.

He doesn’t know really recall when or why he started pushing Mammon away.

“Imma get ya!” Mammon says chasing around a small Satan who has a smile on his face.

“No way, you’re too slow!” Satan tells him sticking his tongue out at him as he runs into one of the many unexplored rooms in the house.

“Why you little-“ Mammon huffs out as he catches up with Satan.

When Mammon does catch up he finds Satan standing in the middle of library.

His eyes full of curiosity as he looks around

“What’s all this?” Satan asks him.

“It’s the house library doofus.” Mammon tells patting his head gently,”No one ever comes in here though.”

“Why?”

“Well it’s easy. Asmo prefers a mirror, uh Levi has his own weird thing going on, uhhh Belphie couldn’t bother while Beel isn’t interested since he can’t eat it. —No one cares about a buncha books. -Nowadays you got these!” Mammon pulls out his D.D.D. with a smile.

Not even a minute later he’s deeply immersed in the phone and scrolling absentmindedly.

“Mammon.” Satan says in attempt to regain his brothers attention.

“Hmm? Oh yeah.” Mammon says with a laugh while putting his phone away,”Anyways uh as for Lucifer I think he might be the only one who comes in here actually.”

“..he does?” Satan asks unsure yet still curiously

“Yknow that one saying..uh what is it. Something about knowledge..er ..uh..oh! That’s right, Knowledge is power! Luci is a firm believer in that certain thing Yknow!” Mammon tells him proudly.

Satan stares at the endless array of books and picks one out. He looks down at it and opens it up.

“It’s in a different language.” Satan tells him with a scowl,”How is anyone suppose to know what it says if they didn’t bother having a translation!?”

Mammon grabs the book from him and attempts to read it himself but fails miserably,”Yknow you’re totally right! It’s lame as hell. Oh—maybe there’s a good money maker in that statement somewhere. “ mammon hums to himself,”Sounds like a lotta work on my part though. You’re probably better off just learning the language yourself.” He tells Satan handing him back the book.

“Learning the language?” Satan says confusingly.

“Er yeah there’s a book somewhere here for that, but I was just messing around, no one’s got the time for that sorta thing.”

Satan hums curiously.

“Anyways I’m pretty sure-“ Mammon says tapping him gently,”You’re it.”

“Hey! No fair! We were on time out.” Satan yells out as Mammon takes off running. He runs right after him.

“I swear Satan, if you don’t stop trying to bite my fingers as I’m trying to feed you i won’t hesitate bitting back.” Mammon warns him.

Satan has another flashback.

“Hah? You’re in here again?” Mammon tells Satan as Satan stands on a stack on books to reach a higher shelf.

“Oh- hey mammo OH -“Satan yelps out as the stack of books begins to wobble underneath him.

Luckily Mammon is able to keep him balanced,”Hey- watch it dummy you’re gonna get hurt.” Mammon a scolds him as Satan continues to attempt to reach for a higher book.

“Nah I won’t, Mammon will save me.” Satan says.

“Damn right I will,”Mammon hums in agreement as he picks satan up,”Now hurry and get the book you want.” He tells Satan.

“Satan, bud, you keep zoning out. You’re starting to freak me out.” Mammon tells him.

“Heya buddy, I was thinking- maybe we can go out shopping today together - what ya say?” Mammon walks in the library with smile.

“No thanks.” Satan tells him as he’s immersed in his book.

“Hah?” Mammon let’s out a confused grunt,”But you like shopping with me.”

“You only take me because you use me as a scapegoat for one of your schemes.” Satan huffs as he doesn’t even bother looking up from his book.

“Hey- er- That’s not true at all! I just like spending time with ya!” Mammon defends his actions.

“Not interested.” Satan let’s put an annoyed grunt,”I have way better things to do.”

“Oh..”Mammon says with a dejected sigh,”Alright..well maybe next time?”

“Probably not.” Satan tells him.

Mammon looks back at his younger brother before leaving the library.

He’d try a few more times to get his younger brothers attention. But the more he tried the more Satan pushed him away.

Mammon stopped trying

“OI! Quit ignoring me!” Mammon snaps his fingers in front of Satan.

“Huh?” Satan turns his attention to Mammon.

“Jeez.” Mammon says as he puts the breakfast to the side,” Ya had me worried for a minute there. I’m telling Lucifer to take these off of you already. Matter in fact, imma do it myself.” He starts to fumble with the chains.

“Mammon wait-“Satan tries to warn the Avatar of Greed but is too late because Satan feels the energy flow through his body.

“Yeouch!” Mammon yelps out after receiving a pretty powerful shock.

“It’s enchanted dumbass!” Satan grits his teeth.

After all— he got shocked too!

“Oi what the hell is wrong with Lucifer!? Treating ya like an animal ” Mammon yells out,”I swear that guy-“

“How about you get this book in my desk. The one with a blue bird sigil on it.” Satan tells him, the shocks always made him feel a bit dizzy.

Mammon rummages through the desk looking for the book.

However, Satan thinks Mammon is taking too long to find it.

“…..”

“Mammon! Quit tryna steal my stuff!” Satan scowls angrily.

“Ha. You caught me. Found yer book.” Mammon tells him as he reproaches ,” What’s this for?”

“It unlocks the chains.” Satan tells him.

“Oh wow really? Awesome! So what I gotta say some cool spell in here or what?” Mammon becomes determined as he flips through the pages. Only to find out they’re all empty,”Ay, you sure this is the right book?“

“It’s the right book-“ Satan tells him,” Stand over here.” He tells Mammon who does as he’s told.

“Now what?”

“Now you’re gonna use the book, and hit the chain really hard.” Satan says with a grin.

“Ah- okay. —Now you’ve lost it.” Mammon closes the book,”Man that shock really did a number on you.”

“Mammon!” Satan huffs at him.

“Fine fine!” Mammon does as he’s told, slamming the book down straight into the chain.

Surprisingly, it snaps in half.

“W-what?! No way! There’s no way a stupid book could’ve cut though that-“ Mammon says in disbelief as Satan removes the cuffs off of him.

“They’re enchanted chains- they’re meant to keep anyone with devil or Angel power from touching them. And they’re also meant to keep a person from using magic when restrained.” Satan explains,”The book is from the human world, even though there is nothing written on it- it has no magic power. “

“How’d you figure out that you can get out of the chains?”

“I read about it.” Satan let’s out a huff as he throws himself back on the bed.

“Huh, guess books are useful after all!” Mammon acknowledges.

It becomes silent after that.

Perhaps it’s time to acknowledge the elephant in the room.

“Mammon.” Satan asks.

“Yeah?”

“What happened?”

“You mean you don’t remember?” Mammon murmurs.

“I don’t.” Satan replies.

Even if it was just for a short time, he’d forgotten all about those emotions he’s been experiencing.

“Well..” Mammon says,”By the time I got there, most of the area was destroyed pretty badly. The only people there were our brothers and of course Lucifer who was tryna stop ya .” Mammon hums with a sigh.

Satan doesn’t respond.

“Honestly Satan,” Mammon asks ,”We know you didn’t just blow up for no reason. We’ve noticed your mood lately…”

There’s no response again.

“You can tell your big bro what’s bugging ya! No judgements here!” Mammon tells him encouragingly

“….”

“Dammit Satan! Say something will ya?!” Mammon pleas with his younger brother.

“Why are you here Mammon?” Satan asks him as he stares up at his ceiling.

“What ya mean ‘why am I here’, it’s cause I’m worried about you! We all are!” Mammon exclaims.

“No Mammon…”Satan sits up from the bed now making it so that Mammon and himself seat side by side.

He turns to Mammon with such repulsion it causes him to flinch back.

“Why are you really here?”

“I- I’m not following.” Mammon tells him, slightly confused by the question.

“Why don’t you be honest for once in your god damn lifetime and answer my question!” Satan grabs Mammon by the collar of his shirt.

“O-oi!” Mammon is unsure of what’s happening. Things are moving rather quickly for Mammon to process correctly.

“All these years! You were always there! Even when I wanted nothing to do with you! Why is that Mammon?! Why did you not hate me like everyone else?!” Satan’s grip on Mammon gets stronger.

“Because I love ya!” Mammon exasperates.

“Wrong answer!” Satans yelling gets louder as he throws Mammon onto the ground.

Mammon attempts to scurry towards the door,”It’s the truth?! What other answer did you want?!”

Satan follows him maliciously,”You pitied me? Right?!”

“Pitied ya?? What the hell are you talking about?!” Mammon yells out a yelp as a chair barely misses him, shattering into pieces next to him.

“You felt bad for poor little Satan! Because nobody wanted to associate themselves with him, right!?” Satan knocks a shelf over in rage.

“That’s not true!” Mammon tells him sternly as he backs up against the door,”I loved you because yer were my kid brother!”

“Liar!” Satan picks him up by the collar once more,”You only loved me because nobody else wanted to! You felt guilty!”

“I did not!”

“You felt guilty Mammon.” Satan in a dangerously quiet tone.

Mammon doesn’t say anything but Satan could hear his pulse quicken.

”You felt guilty! Because not even my own father wanted me. - isn’t that right?” Satan painfully voices—his expression is filled with anger and sorrow as tears start streaming down his face.

Mammon’s face falls and is replaced with one filled with guilt.

Realization dawning on the white haired boy and Mammon could feel hot tears fall down his face.

“I’m sorry..” He croaks out.

“…..”

“Get out.” Satan warns him as he drops his grip.

“Satan-“Mammon pleads as tears fill his eyes.

“GET THE FUCK OUT!” Satan pushes Mammon out the door making the white haired boy fall onto the ground, slamming it closed.

——

(Finally! The Brothers POV!)

(should I change the tags to hurt/comfort/hurt/hurt/hurt/ instead lololol)

Mammon stares in utter disbelief as he watches the door slam close on him.

He could hear footsteps approach him from the side in a hurry.

“Mammon!” Asmo calls out with worry.

“We heard yelling-“Belphie approaches with Beel.

“What happened?!” Levi asks clearly worried for his older brother.

And that’s when they take in the older brothers appearance. More noticeably at the tears spewing out his eyes in such a way, no one thought possible.

He holds such a pained expression -it startles the younger brothers.

“H-hey-“ Belphie is unsure of what to even say. Mammon wasn’t the type to cry in such a way. He always played the tougher act when it came to stuff like this.

But seeing Mammons desperation as he gets up from the floor and begins pounding the on Satans door , crying out in pleas, was probably the most horrifying thing they could’ve ever witnessed.

“Open the god damn door!” Mammon yells out,”Open it now, Satan!”

“M-mammon…”Asmo isn’t sure what to do. Should he stop his brother? Could he?

“What’s..happening..”Levi says clearly horrified.

“I don’t know…”Beel replies with an upset expression.

The brothers flinch as they can hear crashes and sounds of destruction erupt from inside Satans room.

“M-Mammon what happened!?” Levi overcomes his shock as he tries to figure out what’s happening.

“Don’t just fucking stand there! Help me open this door!” Mammon tells him with a harsh tone as he tries to kick in the door.

Levi flinches at the older brothers tone.

Mammon wasn’t the type to angrily swear, especially at his own brothers.

“Why won’t this stupid door open already?!” Mammon frustratingly kicks at it

“Mammon just stop!” Asmo cries out.

“What in the devils name is going on?!” Lucifer’s voice booms out from the end of the hall as he approaches the scene.

“It’s Mammon!” Asmo stands behind Lucifer instinctively ,”I think they got into an argument— he won’t stop crying!”

Lucifer takes a look at his younger brother.

It makes him uneasy.

“Mammon.“ Lucifer calls out to his brother.

Mammon ignores him.

“Mammon,”Lucifer says again,”Satan put an enchantment, there’s no way you’re getting in.”

Mammon stops abruptly, facing the door.

“Mammon, look at me.” Lucifer tells his brother.

Mammon swiftly turns and suddenly has Lucifer by the collar of his shirt - just as Satan did to him.

“M-mammon that’s enough!” Levi calls out to him trying to pull Mammon away from Lucifer but fails miserably.

“This is crazy..” Belphie says out loud,” what’s even happening right now…”

Lucifer looks into his brothers eyes.

They’re staring at him the same way Satan did last night.

“Mammon-“Lucifer says not pleased at his brothers actions.

Tears stream down Mammons face, he’s unable to contain his own rage as he struggles to come to truth with a harsh reality.

“This is all your fault!” Mammon shouts at him.

“My fault?” Lucifer raises an eyebrow as he bears no mind to Mammons aggression— pride getting the best of him in an already delicate situation,”Please, enlighten me.”

That seems to rile Mammon further.

“I can take the punishments!” He continues to yell at Lucifer,”I can take yer cold shoulder - I can take the snarky remarks about being an idiot who does nothing but cause trouble -I can take being called a greedy bastard who only thinks of himself! but Yknow what I won’t take?- “Mammon stares Lucifer dead in the eye.

“-what I won’t take is the way you treat your own family anymore! “ he pushes Lucifer away from him with utter disgust,”He’s your son for fucks sake.“ mammon hardly get’s out.

The tension sky rocketed to an entirely different atmosphere.

There were some quiet gasps and shocked facial expressions in the room.

Mammon however seemed to have gotten such a burden off his chest as he silently recomposes himself and lets Lucifer go.

“Oh my god..”Asmo can’t help but cover his mouth.

“This is really happening.” Levi gulps nervously.

“I’m not liking this at all..…”Beel admits as Belphie remains silent.

Lucifer himself seems surprised and taken back by such a statement as he takes a step away from him.

For a man who can usually keep his composure, Lucifer was having trouble keeping the look of horror off of his face.

“What…..did you just …say?…”Lucifer’s head starts to do cartwheels.

“I refuse to call you my brother anymore!” Mammon confesses,”because my brother would have never treat his own that way!”

“S-satans not..”Lucifer sputters out but is unable to get the words out,”Mammon what are you saying?—”

“Figure out yourself ya damn deadbeat. I’m done here.” Mammon says bitterly walking away from Lucifer.

He glances at his younger brothers as he walks away.

He sighs deeply, holding his temple as he gently massages it. He murmurs an apology to them before disappearing into the house.

…as for Lucifer.

The remaining four turn to their eldest brother.

But it seems the eldest was glued to his spot—replaying the words in his head over and over.

He can feel his hands shaking.

Just a simple sentence….a couple of words.

And they were able to twist a knife into Lucifer’s chest and kill off all the pride Lucifer had left.

The energy surrounding Lucifer was threatening.. it felt hostile.

“Leave.” Lucifer demanded.

And that’s exactly what they did.

——

“Ahh-That was so scary.” Asmo tells him three brothers as they gather in the attic.

Beel hums in agreement,”I’ve never seen Mammon so angry before.”

“Mammon?? But did you see the way Lucifer reacted when Mammon said-“ Belphie comments before stopping abruptly.

“This is so weird..” Levi admits,”I say we just go back to our rooms and hope they figure it out themselves.”

Asmo glares Levi,”That’s not an option and you know it.”

Beel hums again in agreement.

Levi sulks with a sigh,”Yeah I know…but isn’t there a chance we can make things worse by getting involved? I mean look at Mammon, he got involved and look what happened to him.”

“That’s true,” Belphie nods his head in agreement as he crosses him arms.

“No it’s not!” Asmo exasperates,” We should at least try and figure out what’s actually going on, we owe it to them to try-“

“I agree.” Beel says,”Mammon is always there for us when things like this happen, Lucifer is always getting us out of trouble too…as for Satan-“ Beel mumbles the last part,”We owe him that much.”

The other brothers look at Beel surprised by his declaration.

Belphie let’s out a sigh,”You’re right Beel.”

Levi nods,”Yeah.”

Asmo smiles at his younger brother,” Agreed.”

“I guess we should try and figure out how this all started then..”Levi tells them.

“Right!” Asmo tells him,”I’d have to say it starts with Satan’s weird behavior these past weeks,”He’s totally been avoiding us as much as he can.”

There’s a nod of agreements.

“But when did that start?” Belphie asks,”was there something that could’ve triggered Satan?”

Levi shakes his head,”Not that I know of, but he did explode yesterday at the festival..and now that I think about it….when we’d ask him about stuff regarding the festival he seemed distant.”

“That’s true,”Beel says,”Don’t you remember Lucifer saying he contributed the least amount at breakfast?”

“That’s right!” Asmo says,”Usually he’s really the only one put his back and bone into events like this.”

“It clearly bothered him..considering what he did to that poor fork.” Belphie says with a nervous expression with Asmo nodding his head in agreement.

“But if he was bothered by the idea of the festival, why did he agree to it?” Levi asks genuinely unsure.

The brothers sit in thought. Usually if Satan doesn’t like something he’d say it outright.

“If I had to guess…”Belphie says with a dry laugh ,”Probably because Lucifer didn’t want to do it.”

“Yeah..that sounds like Satan.” Levi agrees.

“Do you think Lucifer thought something like this might happen?” Beel asks.

“It wouldn’t be out of character for Lucifer to think a few steps ahead of everyone…but I don’t know…” Belphie says,”He did seem pretty surprised yesterday at Satan’s meltdown....”

Everyone becomes silent.

After all, they didn’t get there until the very end of what they assume was Lucifer stopping Satan’s wrath.

Lucifer’s expression carried worry and concern across his face. He almost looked guilty.

“What happened?!” Asmo rushes as he sees Lucifer standing with an unconscious Satan in his arms.

“He did it again…”Levi says with a concerned expression.

“Satan…”Beel says glumly.

“I knew it was a bad idea to let him leave.” Belphie sighs.

The scene had both Satan and Lucifer with tattered clothes. Just how much happened in such a short amount of time?

Lucifer’s expression changes.

It looks sad as his demonic form fades away.

Sad for the blonde boy as he held up his unconscious body in his arms.

Lucifer reaches to move the blondes hair out of his face but hesitates, pulling away.

He sighs deeply, obviously troubled,”I’ll let Diavolo know what happened later, for now let’s section this area off…and go home.”

And that’s what happens.

They go home.

And they don’t follow Lucifer as he carries Satan up to his room.

“His face was so..”Asmo says,”I’ve never seen either of them like that…well not since…” He‘s at a lost for words.

“Yeah…”Belphie croaks out.

Beel nods in agreement.

“But I thought Satan was like…okay now?” Levi asks,”I thought we helped him get through that?”

“I thought so too,”Asmo tells him as he puts a hand to his face in frustration,”I’m sure we did. It has to be something else then.”

“What about what Mammon said?” Belphie asks,”He called Satan Lucifer’s son. He was really pissed off at Lucifer.”

There’s an uneasy tension in the room again.

“…..”

“….”

“Ah! This is so weird and confusing!” Asmo breaks the silence with a groan.

“Ughh.” Levi complains.

“Alright alright. So from what I’ve gathered Satan disliked the festival. And Something happened from that day to the day of the festival between Satan and Lucifer?” Belphie asks.

“No- We would’ve known something about an argument or discourse if something did happen between those two,”Levi tells him.

“Then what the hell is it?!” Belphie yells out,”If nothing happened between them then why did they all react in such a way??”

Asmo sighs,”Whatever it is, Mammon must’ve tried to console Satan about it. But that didn’t work out….clearly.”

“It looked like…. Like Mammon had a guilty expression on his face when he got thrown out...” Beel says,”At least from what I saw..”

“But what would Mammon feel guilty about? If anyone is less responsible for Satan’s behavior lately, it’s Mammon. “ Levi tells him,”After all he did volunteer to deliver him breakfast this morning.”

“Mmm breakfast …”Beel says. He’s ignored.

“Yeah, Mammon was really the only one who looked after him after he was born.” Belphie mumbles.

“Ugh! Don’t remind me! I still hate myself for ever feeling that way to someone who’s family -“Asmo admits,”Even so! We were forgiven for that! We even all cried it out together!”

There are hums of agreement.

“So..the problem …is most likely Lucifer and Satan?” Belphie tilts his head in confusion.

“Isn’t it always them anyways? Satans always hated Lucifer.” Asmo responds.

“They never got along. That much we know. So what changed?” Levi questions,”Lucifer is the only one acting the same - Satan’s the one who started acting different …”

“I can’t put my finger on it ,”Belphie says,”call it a gut feeling…or beels hunger …but…my guess…is this is all because of the way Lucifer’s been treating Satan…”

“Huh? How is it any different than before?” Levi asks.

“Think about it, why else would Mammon get involved?”

“I don’t know, he’s Mammon.” Asmo makes his argument.

“No- like really think about it. This isn’t the first time Mammon’s argued with Lucifer …even if not to this degree..it feels similar... It’s happened before- back when-…when Satan…when he tried to…“ Belphie murmurs out.

Beel touches his twin brothers shoulder, shaking his head urging him not to continue.

“Don’t say more.” Asmo says looking down at the ground in shame as he covers his ears and eyes ,” I don’t want to remember… I don’t want to.”

(Imma put trigger warning here, brief mention of an attempt )

“I can’t believe you!” Mammon yells at Lucifer,”So you show you care for a few days and then go back to being a heartless son of a bitch? Do you not care about what just happened?! Do you not realize how pathetic you look?! There’s no pride in neglecting someone who needs you right now!”

“I told you before Mammon, I can’t stop everything that’s happening for Satan’s sake… I can’t. You need to understand someone has to make sure you all have roofs over your heads!” Lucifer’s tone changes into one with discontent,”How can you say I’m being neglectful when all I’ve done and sacrificed is for your sakes!”

“Cant you see?! We’re falling apart out here! All that won’t matter if you can’t get your act straight!”

Lucifer turns away from Mammon as he touches his temple of his head with his fingers ,”Mammon…” He says in a serious tone,”I don’t know why you’re so insistent about Satan. I already told you. He’s our brother, you know I care for him.”

“I held him Lucifer!” Mammon voice cracks,”In my arms. And I couldn’t feel him.”

Lucifer looks back at his brother with a pained expression,”Im sorry Mammon.”

“Why ..why can’t you..just love him…”Mammon pleads.

“I do love him.”

“That’s not what I mean and you know it.”

“I can’t love him any other way.” He turns away from his younger brother.

“He’s your-!”

“Mammon.” Lucifer interrupts him with a warning,”He’s our brother. So let it go.”

Lucifer walks away.

“Don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to you!” Mammon warns.

“Handle it yourself. I’m done here.”

“Lucifer!”

Lucifer ignores him.

No response.

“Dammit Lucifer! Stop acting like Fath-!!!” Mammon says before being startled by the feeling of a smaller hand touching his arm.

“It’s okay Mammon. It’s not worth being upset over. That’s just who he is.”

Mammon looks down at his younger brother with nothing but surprise.

“You shouldn’t be here..” Mammon tells him,”you should be taking it easy..”

“It’s okay. I’m okay now. My brothers made me feel better.”

Mammon turns to the door, to find his other younger siblings watching nervously.

He glances back in Lucifer’s direction, only to see him gone. He lets out a sigh of relief.

“You guys can come out, it’s alright.” Mammon tells them. They step out and Mammon watches as Satan runs to Beel, who picks him up with ease and a smile.

“Well I definitely missed something.” Mammon says watching the event unfold in front of him.

He watches as Asmo wipes a present tear from his eye as he cuddles Satan lovingly,”You could say that.”

Satan scowls at Asmo’s sudden display of affection but the fifth born pays no mind to it.

“He’s like a little cat.” Belphie tells him,”Isn’t that right Lev?”

“Yeah he’s a cute little brother or whatever. I guess. For now.” Leviathan crosses his arms.

Mammon watches his brothers with a thoughtful expression. He turns in the direction in which Lucifer left. He lets out a sigh before turning back to his younger brothers.

There is happy yet relieved smile from him,”Yeah he is. Isn’t he?”

It’s quiet for a while as the brothers recall the distant past.

“Were we wrong?” Asmo asks quietly,”We were wrong to just have accepted Lucifer’s word like that?”

“Lucifer told us to call him our brother- so that’s what we did-“ Levi yells out in desperation,”I mean- “

“what else were we suppose to tell him? No?”

“Maybe we could’ve said something-“Asmo admits,”…I won’t lie …and say I was a bit confused by Satan’s birth ..it always felt weird to call him my little brother.. maybe that’s why…I found it hard to get along with him at first..”

“I also found it really odd..”Beel tells them.

“Well it’s not like we can change the past so there’s no use dwelling on it.” Belphie sighs.

“But still!” Asmo tells them,”Something tells me we contributed to Satan’s meltdown…again.”

Levi let’s out a long frustrated sigh,”Well what are we suppose to do now? It’s not like we can force Lucifer to accept Satan…even if he does, I highly doubt Satan is going to welcome him with open arms.”

“Accept him how?” Asmo asks crossing his arms, ”Just exactly what are we expecting to happen?”

“I don’t know! Something ?!” Levi exclaims,”I just want things to go back to normal! If only Lucifer had just-“ Levi stammers,”If h-he had ..just .... “

Levi let’s out another deep sigh.

“Now I get how Satan and Mammon feel.” Levi murmurs.

His younger brothers look at him with a surprised expression.

“Stop staring at me!” Levi scowls,”Its just-“

“—Even though he calls Satan his brother—“ He shakes his head,”And he says he loves him- it’s just not the same thing…It’s not! The man who’s suppose to be your father …refuse to acknowledge you as much.. I’ve played too many games with this plot line to know how it usually ends!…”

“This is real life Levi!” Asmo huffs at him. A few quiet seconds go by before he quietly asks Levi,”how does it usually end?”

Levi has a glum expression,”You don’t wanna know.”

“You’re not helping!” Asmo let’s out a groan.

Belphie rubs his hand through his own hair to relieve tension,”I guess when you put it that way..I’d be pretty upset about it too… but that doesn’t mean the Anti-Lucifer League is changing its core values and goals - ”

“Oh shut up.” Asmo throws a pillow at him.

“Oof!”

“Yeah..”Beel hums,”It doesn’t help that Lucifer hardly bats an eye Satan’s way either. Unless, of course, Satan is getting into trouble…”

“We can’t just put all the blame on Lucifer!” Asmo argues.

“He’s Satan’s dad!” Levi argues back.

“But! Lucifer has done a lot for us! - he puts roof over our head, feeds us, and let’s indulge in our sins occasionally - he’s not all that heartless! I know he cares- he does! He’s a great brother! Sure he’s not all touchy feely all the time but that’s not something we should reprimand him for! can’t we at least see try to see his perspective before putting all blame on him?”

“The truth Asmo…is that Satan is Lucifer’s son. Whether we like to admit it or not…..Lucifer can be a great brother, but he can also be a shit dad.”Belphie determines.

Asmo crosses his arms once more with a sigh,”When you put it like that…l”

The room gets silent again.

“So….what now?” Asmo asks.

“Dunno.” Belphie replies.

“We’re literally right back at the beginning!” Levi cries in annoyance,”This feels like a problem between Satan and Lucifer— and those two are the most stubborn pricks I know!! Nothing is ever gonna get fixed if we don’t do SOMETHING.”

“So what do you propose we do?” Asmo asks,”I mean when it comes to touchy feely, those two are completely hopeless.. So that’s a total lost cause.”

Belphie groans,”It won’t matter if it doesn’t come from Lucifer.”

“Agreed. I think it’s time we tell Lucifer how we really feel. Maybe he’ll open up to the idea more about Satan...” Beel says.

“I think it’s a start.” Levi hums as Asmo agrees.

“So what about Mammon?” Belphie asks,”He’s pretty upset at Lucifer as well. Do you think maybe we should talk to him first?”

“It’s worth a shot.” Levi tells,”Though I don’t know if he’ll be up for it.”

“I think it’s best we give him some space…he might still be emotional from earlier... We should talk to him before dinner though.” Beel tells them. They all nods heads.

“So it’s settled, we talk to Mammon. Then we talk to Lucifer.”

“Why do I feel like this won’t end well.” Levi sighs.

“That’s because it never does.”

তততততততততততততততততততততততত

ohh yeah, now the real angst is coming.

next part is the talk with 💕Mammon💕 and finally SOME COMFORT LOLOL

will we finally get Lucifer’s pov ?

Hi hi hi it’s the author again! Originally this was only going to be two chapters long but I got so into writing I couldn’t help myself. Ahhh I swear comfort is coming soon, maybe lololol

Also, not that some care but I originally wrote in Mammon finding Satan but felt it would be too much for people . T-T

I was also gonna add Satan’s brothers finally accepting Satan as family during a flashback but personally I feel like the story isn’t centered around that but around his relationship to Lucifer and the way it’s affecting his relationships with everyone else.

Even though I purposely left out Lucifer interactions for chapter 1 and most of chapter 2

Anyways I’m sure there’s spelling errors and stuff in here I’ll get to eventually so forgive me >.<

I ranted on for too long! Sorry!

83 notes · View notes

beelsfridge · 9 months

Text

My Eldest Brother (But He’s My Father)

Trigger Warnings/Tags:

1/2

Synopsis:

Satan can’t help but feel the rage boil in him during a school festival at the sight of Lucifer

But there’s another feeling lingering as he stares at the kindness and gentle expressions he shares with the someone so small.

Ones he never saw growing up.

When Satan realizes that he yearns and longs for something he can never have

তততততততততততততততততততততততত

Why is it that he feels like he’s going to implode at any given moment.?

Thump Thump Thump

His heart beating so fast, his palms itching with pure wrath. this feeling .. one he’s not felt in quite a while. There’s other emotions there that he doesn’t comprehend…but the one emotion he does recognize—the feeling that makes him want to destroy everything around him.

Including himself.

____

“So let me get this straight,”Mammon says as he leans back into his chair in a such a mannerless way,”Ya want us to..organize a festival?…for what again?”

Scoffs and groans of annoyance echo the room as the brothers sit around the table.

“Really Mammon?” Asmo says with a huff.

“Were you seriously not listening to a single thing Lord Diavolo said?” Levi asks bewildered.

“Of course he wasn’t. He’s Mammon.” Belphie retorts as Beel hums in agreement.

Lucifer sighs and holds the temples of his head in annoyance,”I apologize Lord Diavolo, it seems my younger brother needs a reminder on his manners.”

“O-oi…”Mammon says with a hint of fear in his voice,”What ya mean by that Luci?”

Lucifer only shoots him a stern look making Mammon gulp in response.

Diavolo laughs in response shaking his head in a cheerful way,”No worries Lucifer, I’ll be able to review just to make sure you all understand your responsibilities. So to make things short, we’re going to be holding a school festival for both students and their families to enjoy.”

“If I may ask Lord Diavolo, is there a particular reason for wanting to hold this sort of festival?” Lucifer asks—unsure why Diavolo would suggest something so suddenly.

Diavolo smiles in response,”As you know, there are a lot of demons still hesitate on sending their kids to R.A.D as it is. I’m hoping if we open this event to the community we’ll see an increase in enrollments for all ages. But more towards the younger children especially.”

“I see.” Lucifer says looking down at the paper with the list of things needed for the festival.

“Which is why! I thought to ask none other than the Lords of the Underworld themselves!! Seeing that you all have such a familial bond!” Diavolo hums in excitement.

“Er…”Levi says,”I’m not sure if we’re the best people for the task.” He admits.

Lucifer doesn’t hesitate to agree much to everyone’s surprise ,”I agree, we’re as dysfunctional as one can get.”

“Which is precisely why I asked you all!” Diavolo says with another cheerful laugh.

“Er..is that a compliment or an insult?” Mammon asks unsure of what he really means.

Diavolo doesn’t answer the question,”I have full confidence that you will be able to create a memorable night for us all.”

“Well if you ask me, that sounds like a perfect opportunity to flaunt my looks to all of Devildom!” Asmo sighs with joy caressing his face delicately.

“I guess…. It sounds a little fun.” Belphie murmurs with Beel humming in agreement.

“There will be a lot of tasty food.” Beel says licking his lips.

Levi says shaking his head“I don’t know, sounds like a lot of people ..and socializing..” His face falls with horror before huffing out,”But maybe..someone there might like rui chan..like me.”

“Well I for one absolutely love the idea of a festival. A buncha people coming with tons of money- I mean tons of family. Sounds like an amazing thing if you ask me!” Mammon with a laugh.

Diavolo smiles with joy before turning to Satan,”You’ve been awfully quiet Satan. What are your thoughts?”

Satan stays quiet for a few moments longer before responding in a sigh,”I suppose I have nothing better to do.”

“Lord Diavolo-“ Lucifer says before getting cut off.

“Excellent! It’s decided then! I officially call this meeting adjourned!”

It’d been about a week since Diavolo announced the festival, everyone had been pretty busy working on it. They seemed pretty excited about it too.

Satan however was absolutely appalled by the idea when Diavolo first mentioned it.

But he only agreed because Lucifer seemed so against it.

There wasn’t anything wrong with the idea…but what exactly does someone get out of something like that?

The idea of parents coming with their children to a festival together and enjoying themselves isn’t exactly making any sense to Satan.

He feels like he’s missing something. Something he can’t put his finger on.

“ I mean- of course I can provide the reasonable entertainment for the festival. What kinda person does Lucifer think I am Yknow? Just wait til he sees who I got for that festival -“ Mammon says before noticing Satan’s continuous silence.

Usually he’d be calling Mammon irresponsible or something like that.

“Oi-“ Mammon whistles— stirring Satan out of his thoughts ,”You’re awfully quiet today Satan. Got sum on ya mind?”

Satan looks over at Mammon who so happens to be cutting some vegetables. After all, they were both on kitchen duty tonight.

Satan contemplates whether he should express his thoughts or not. Or well..whether he should express them to someone like Mammon.

“Not really..” Satan says as he furrows his eyebrows peeling some of devildoms finest potatoes.”

“Oi- don’t gimme any of that. I know you too well Satan,” Mammon crosses his arms, abandoning his duties,” If there’s something on yer mind tell me. That’s why yer big bro is here!” He smiles joyously.

“Mammon.” Satan says in a serious tone.

“Ya?”

”The Buffo Toad is on fire.”

Mammon squeals as he turns quickly to find the pan on fire. He attempts to save the dish from further damage.

Satan can’t help but chuckle at Mammons antics.

It’s so familiar to him.

“Ohhhhh Satan!” Mammon calls out from a distance,”Where’d ya go buddy?”

Satan wraps the blanket around him tighter, hiding himself away in a small closet space as he sniffles quietly to himself.

It’s not long before the darkness of the closet is overcome with light as the door opens behind him.

“There ya are…”Mammon says with a gentle tone,”What ya doing in here by yourself?..”

Satan attempts to wipe away his boogers and tears,”It’s none of your business. Leave me alone.”

“Nu uh. I know you too well to know when you’re upset.” Mammon tells him before stepping into the closet and closing the door behind him.

He crouched down and sits next to Satan, gently patting his head,” You can tell me anything. I’m your big bro for a reason!”

That’s when Mammon bumps the shelf behind him with his elbow on accident causing everything to fall on top of him.

He lets out a small yelp but instinctively shields Satan from getting hurt as he quickly hovers over him,”Man I told Levi not to put his stinkin junk in here!” He scowls.

Satan looks up at Mammon and let’s out a small laugh forgetting the reason why he was even crying to begin with

“Gah!” Mammon says with a sigh of relief,”I hope no one minds a bit of burned buffo toad.” He smiles before sulking immediately after at the thought of Lucifer scolding him.

Why did Satan remember that? Mammon is always getting into trouble.

Why was this time any different than before?

How weird. He doesn’t understand.

He decides to not think about it anymore for the time being. If he lets Mammon take control of preparing the food, chances are he’ll burn everything on accident.

——-

Dinner was manageable. But Satan still felt like something was troubling him. He just couldn’t put his finger on it.

Maybe he can look for a book that might have the answers he’s looking for.

“Where are you going Satan?” Asmo asks all his brothers (except for Lucifer) settle down in the living room for movie night.

“Back to my room.” Satan states.

“But it’s movie night!” Asmo exclaims.

“Well Mammons not here either-“ Satan points out.

“That’s because Lucifer got to him first.” Levi shivers in fear.

“What did he do this time?” Satan asks with a confused expression.

“Dunno. We all took off before he could process what was happening. Something about the festival I’m assuming” Asmo says.

Levi nods in agreement,”Anyways! If I get dragged out of my room every Thursday for this there’s no way you escaping that easily.”

“Well Belphie already sleeping-“Satan points out.

“Huh?” Levi looks to Belphie who’s snoring soundly ,”Oh that’s totally unfair!”

“Belphie! Wake up!” Asmo groans while shaking him to wake him up.

“I’m hungry…”Beel says.

“You’re always hungry!” Asmo huffs.

As they argue amongst each other Satan decides to sneak away while he still can. He can’t help but let out a small smile at their ridiculousness.

But that feeling… that feeling ..what is it?

“But how are you so sure he’s not gonna wreck everything again!” A voice rings from the living room. It’s Asmo.

“Yeah, last time he destroyed the TV. We couldn’t get a new one for weeks.” Levi states. There’s a hum of agreement from what is presumably Beel.

“Why don’t y’all go easier on him- he’s just a kid.” Mammom tells them,”I’ll watch him. I’ll take responsibility if anything happens. Just give him another chance-“

“That’s like letting a ticking time bomb in the room! No way! Besides last time you said the same thing but we all got scolded by Lucifer anyways!” Asmo tells him.

“I got nothing against the kid.” Belphie says,”But how can you control something like that?

“It’s not like he asked for his sin! You guys are total jerks Yknow that?!!” Mammon tells them off.

The door creaks slightly.

There’s a silence that falls between them all.

“Satan. We know you’re there.” Mammons voice calls out,”You can come out.”

Satan backs away from the door. When he sees it pushed open a bit more slightly he takes off running.

“I didn’t ask ..for this!” He heard his own voice echo through his head. His chest feels heavy. That itching feeling in his hands. That hot fire that spreads throughout his body.

“I can’t- I can’t control myself. I can’t help- I can’t help it-“ Satan says feeling overwhelmed.

He blacks out completely.

Satan stares into his room. It’s eerily quiet inside. How long was he just standing there?

He’s not particularly fond of that memory. So why did he remember it just now?

He feels his chest bubble in anger.

How annoying.

He picks up the flyer for the festival, one that Asmo made a few days ago that had already gotten approved by Diavolo…

Ever since they brought up the festival all that happens now is is these damn memories that keep resurfacing.

He knows his brothers do not behave that way toward him anymore. Nor is he a raging revenge driven like his younger self.

so why does he dwell on the feeling longer than he should?

And what feeling is he dwelling on exactly? It feels bitter. But in a different way as opposed to wrath.

He feels… he feels…

Satan places the now torn flyer on his desk and let’s out a sigh.

He doesn’t know.

___

With every passing day, Satan could feel his emotions spark into more dangerous thoughts which inevitably evolved into more a physical and verbal form.

And he wasn’t the only one who noticed this behavior. After all, it seemed as if the fourth born was intentionally avoiding his own family.

He’d go straight to his room after school, he’d go straight to his room after dinner. He wouldn’t stick around for events very long or at all.

And whenever someone asks him something— no matter what it was —he’d feel himself snap just like that.

Like the incident the other day at breakfast.

He was usually one of the firsts one to show up to breakfast. Always early.

But he was uncharacteristically late. And his appearance was no better, at least he thinks so. A bit disheveled and some baggy eyes.

But despite never being late like so. It still earned him a simple warning from Lucifer.

And that especially pissed him off.

While his brothers thought he was let off fairly easily, Satan could feel the fireworks attempting to go off inside.

Even so—breakfast continued. Each going on and on about their excitement for the festival. Each having contributed to its success as expected. Even Mammon who’s mainly known slacking off and putting half effort into something seemed pretty excited.

Everyone seemed. Excited. For this..family event.

He felt bitter again.

Satan had plenty of family nights before. This one should be no different.

…it shouldn’t feel so different..

So everyone continues breakfast, just as they normally would.

“Satan,” Lucifer says,”I’ve noticed you haven’t contributed as much as everyone else. Are you having trouble with coming up with an idea?”

He feels everyone’s eyes on him—awaiting his response.

It’s quiet for for a couple moments.

He feels their expressions change as he stares into his plate of food.

Worry glances between Lucifer and Satan flicker back and forth.

Was he quiet for too long?

He grits his teeth.

No witty remark.

No attempts at to hurt Lucifer’s pride.

Just pure rage.

“No.” He says bitterly as he glares in their direction.

Some worried expressions turn nervous, confused at their brothers sudden fowl mood.

Hell, even Lucifer seems confused by Satan’s state.

Satan doesn’t realize how tightly he’s holding the fork in his hand until it snaps in half causing Asmo and Belphie who are seated next to him to flinch.

Satan looks down. He opens his hand and sorrowfully stares at the broken fork laying in his palm.

After all, sorrow is not an expression you’ll see on the Avatar of Wrath so often. Especially in a room filled with people who’s eyes are on him.

He doesn’t say anything as he drops the fork pieces onto the table.

He doesn’t say anything when he gets up and walks out of the dining hall.

And no one says anything to him.

“I hate you all! I hate you - I hate you!” Satan claws at the walls as he flings the portraits off the walls and tears them to bits.

“Someone get Lucifer before he wrecks the whole place!” Asmo yells out doing nothing to stop Satan from releasing his wrath.

Beel nods and hurries off to get Lucifer

“He’s going crazy again-“ Levi sighing as he dodges the various things thrown his way.

“What’s with all the ruckus?!” Mammon rushes into the room before seeing the chaotic scene in front of him.

“He’s uncontrollable!” Asmo tells him.

“What happened?!” Mammon asks bewildered as a small Satan continues to ensue damage,”Satan buddy it’s time to calm down!”

Asmo gives Mammon a guilty look,”We may have…said a couple things …but how were we suppose to know he was listening in?!”

Mammon flashes them a dirty look as he stands behind Satan who’s currently smashing a bunch of things before standing before a statue of probably the Demon Lord.

“Satan.” Mammon tells him,”It’s time to stop. Lucifer is gonna get mad.”

Satan immediately tries to claw out Mammon,”Stop that! Stop pitying me!”

Mammon takes a step back and just barely misses Satan’s attack,”What are yer talking about I don’t pity ya! Your my little brother, and I care about you- But you need to calm down now before someone gets hurt.”

“Everyone here hates me!” Satan yells,”Everyone!”

“We don’t hate ya- they’re just scared of ya!” Mammon tells,”But I’m not- I promise ya-nothing is gonna happen to ya- so put the statue down bud.“

“I didn’t ask to be here!” Satan admits out loud as tears spill out his eyes. He chokes back sob,”I didn’t ask to be born- I didn’t ask- I don’t - I don’t want to be here- I don’t- I wish I could just die-“

Mammon’s face falls into despair as he stares at the boy with disbelief.

The other brothers sharing a look of guilt beyond measure.

Satan can’t help but sigh in his library. Yet another painful memory. But it can’t be helped. Satan struggled with identity problems for the longest.

It had to happen eventually. Despite it all, he was able to develop better relationships with his brothers afterwards.

However…

Why is it.. that Satan feels like he’s missing the true meaning behind the return of these memories?…

He’s missing something.

Something is missing.

Someone?

Its confusing. It’s been this way for a while now.

Whatever it is, it’s always missing.

And he wants it so badly

he yearns for whatever it is.

But what is that?

—

The day of the festival came sooner than he would’ve liked.

If he hadn’t been on edge, perhaps he could’ve taken in the breathtaking visual of the festival his brothers were shockingly able to conjure.

Everyone put in so much effort..

Satan..not so much..

He found himself uneasy the moment more and more families began to show up.

But he tried to push those feelings away.

He could feel his brothers keeping an eye on him.

Considering his actions lately, he couldn’t blame them since he couldn’t entirely explain them either.

He should at very least pretend to be enjoying himself.

“Satan.” Lucifer calls out from behind.

“What?” Satan asks.

“Are you…enjoying yourself at the festival?” Lucifer asks him.

Satan looks at him bewildered. What reason could he have for wanting to know Satan’s opinion?

It pisses him off.

“What do you think?” Satan replies in a bitter way. It seems this is the only way he’s been responding to anyone nowadays.

“Are you upset?” Lucifer asks genuinely curious.

“That doesn’t concern you.” He tells Lucifer.

“Well I’m your eldest brother. It does concern me to some extent.” Lucifer tells him,”Your behavior has been..quite abnormal these past few weeks.

“If you’re going to lecture me I’m not in the mood. ” Satan tells him,”So leave me alone.”

Why do his words strike him in such a negative way.

Lucifer let’s out a sigh,”Your brothers are worried about you-“

That’s when Lucifer’s D.D.D goes off. He excuses himself briefly but tells Satan to stay put before answering the call.

After a moment Lucifer hangs up the call.

“It seems that Mammon needs help with setting up the last tent.” Lucifer tells him.

Satan doesn’t know why he feels a burning tension. That same feeling. Itching away at him.

“Whatever.” Satan replies wanting to quickly escape from whatever the hell is happening to him.

“Satan-“Lucifer calls out to him but is ignored as Satan rushes through the crowd.

Why is he acting like this?

Why does his chest feel heavy?

Ugh, he needs to find something to do. Otherwise he might do something he regrets.

Soon enough Satan finds himself in a lonelier part of the festival. It’s much quieter, much to his delight.

He’s able to catch his breath as he leans against a the wall, just tucked between some booths.

He crosses his arms and let’s out another deep sigh as he watches families walk by with their children.

That feeling came back.

He watches as a kid is picked up in the air by his father and placed on his shoulders with a cheerful smile.

“This is like totally the best day ever!” The little boy says to his father.

His father smiles back at him,”I agree. It’s been a while since we’ve been able to hang out like this right bud? Well I promise from now on— we’ll hang out a lot more alright?”

“Alright!! Oh dad hey! that looks good! Can we try that??” The boy points to a nearby food stand.

“Of course we can. You can have whatever you’d like, I love you so much kiddo.”

“I love you too dad!”

And the voices fade away. Leaving Satan in a state of confusion and chaos.

The scene replays over and over in his head.

He could feel it, in the pit of stomach, along his chest, and around his heart. That feeling.

It’s not jealously ..it’s not.

He feels it with his brothers ..

And he feels it the most when he’s with Lucifer.

___

somehow he’s emptier than before.

He’s pretty sure his brothers are looking for him.

Considering that they were suppose to meet up an hour ago. It makes sense that they would be blowing up his phone nonstop.

The phone he’d put on silent to avoid seeing anyone.

Because if his brothers were to see the state he were in. He’s almost certain he’d explode.

And he’s trying really hard not to.

He runs his fingers through his hair anxiously tugging away to relieve tension.

His crazed state, making hyper aware of anyone who walks by or speaks near him.

The anxiety and sheer anger coursing through his veins.

Why is he overreacting to something he already knew?

Why was he feeling this way after so many years?

He knows the truth of his birth, he knows who he is.

He’s been through this before- he’s had this sort of meltdown before- but it’s different -why is it different?

Why does he keep asking the same damn questions -it’s pissing him.

It’s making him angry!

He doesn’t know- he doesn’t know!

Sooner or later his brothers are going to find him here, he should move from here.

He should probably leave the area entirely because if he doesn’t he’s afraid of what he might do.

So he gives himself a few moments to relax before he moves from his spot.

He walks by the crowd of people in a hurry, occasionally receiving a strange look or two. After all he looks like he just committed a crime.

He’s finding it really hard to keep his composure.

It’s getting harder to breathe

He feels himself claw slightly at his collar.

It’s suffocating.

“Satan! I found him guys!” He hears one of his brothers call out from a distance. He’s not sure which one it is. He can’t think properly.

He walks faster.

His breath quickens and his heart races. He needs to get ahold of himself.

He hears certain footsteps approach him in attempts to catch up to him but he refuses to turn their way.

Then he feels a hand on his grab ahold of his arm.

When he turns, he meets eyes with Asmo.

“H-Hey we’ve been looking for you ….” Asmo says as his own worry begins to grow more and more let’s out a small whisper,”What’s wrong?… you look like you’ve been-”

Satan pulls his arm away from Asmo in a harsh way.

“Leave me alone.” Satan let’s out in a threatening tone as he tries to walk again.

“No!” Asmo yells out as he grabs Satan’s arm again,”I’m not letting you go! I don’t know what’s going on with you but I won’t leave you! Not this time!” Asmo declares as more of his brothers begin to approach,”I don’t care if you hurt me you’re my brother - just watch the face -“

Satan stays silent for couple moments. Everything seems to move at a slower place rather than before.

All those feelings he had just now replaced by rage and disgust.

His brother is just trying to offer him some consultation.

So why does he hate it so much?

“Is that suppose to comfort me?” Satan asks him with a harsh expression causing the younger brother to flinch away.

“Hey what’s going on?” Belphie says with concern.

“Satan..you don’t look so good.” Levi tells him as Beel hums in agreement, looking at his brother with concern.

Satan grunts as he let out sound of annoyance,”I’m going back home.” He tells them as he crosses his arms ,”Not in the mood.”

Sure, as if he wasn’t just mere moments from destroying everything his brothers worked hard for.

“You can’t leave! Diavolo said we could have the rest of the night off- so we can have fun together as a family -“Belphie tells him.

For some reason, the word family lingered in Satan’s head.

He turns around and walks away from his brothers.

The last thing he hears is Levi let out a sigh

”Man..where’s Mammon or Lucifer when you need them.”

___

Satan is tired.

Exhausted?

To have so many feelings at once then feel nothing at all CONSTANTLY- is draining.

he just wants to go home.

Back to the library.

His room.

His comfort place.

Because believe it or not the Avatar of Wrath has a comfort place.

One where he was able to escape his daily life back in the day, even for a brief moment.

He finds himself walking through the crowds toward the exit.

He’s almost out of this god forsaken place.

He’d apologize later, after this damn festival ends.

Everything will be fine

It has to.

Everything will return to normal.

Because he doesn’t know what he’ll do if it doesn’t.

And then.. the most damning thing happens.

He hears it.

A familiar sound, from a distance.

His heart begins to pound dramatically.

His skin crawls with disgust.

He figures out the cause of all his problems.

And Satan can’t stop himself from moving in its direction.

He’s breathing is heavy once again.

And then he sees him, he sees the man responsible for his distress.

And he sees that man kneeling to a young boy, the boy from before.

“Are you lost?” Lucifer asks him in a gentle voice.

“I-i don’t know where my dad went.” The little boy cries out.

“My name is Lucifer, I’m in charge of the event here. If you’d like we can go find him together. I was looking for someone as well.”

“My dad…he said not to trust strangers.” The boy says hesitatingly.

Lucifer only chuckles,”Your dad taught you well then. Yes it’s true, never trust a stranger wholeheartedly. So how about this,” Lucifer offers his hand out to the boy,”How about we look for him together. There’s plenty of people around and if you feel uncomfortable at any point we can just wait together.”

The boy looks at Lucifer, unsure if it’s the best decision.

And that’s when Lucifer does the most damning thing.

He smiles.

He smiles so fondly at the young boy. Satans not sure he’s seen that expression before.

He pats his head gently,”So how about that?”

The boy nods and takes Lucifer’s hand gently,”O-okay!”

Satan stays still as he watches the events unfold in front of him.

The feeling finding it’s way around his heart once more.

He finds himself holding his chest tightly.

Why is it that he feels like he’s going to implode at any given moment??

Thump Thump Thump

Including himself.

Oh that feeling.. the one he wasn’t sure about.

He knows what it is now.

It’s resentment.

“Satan?” Lucifer asks from a distance, becoming aware of his younger brothers presence.

He’s aggrieved.

Lucifer is unsure of what to make of his younger brothers expression as he instinctively steps in front of the younger boy.

“Satan..”Lucifer warns.

Why are people starting to hurry away from the area?

When did Satan change into his demonic form?

He’s not sure.

But he doesn’t care.

Because all he feel now, is wrath.

He doesn’t remember anything after that.

তততততততততততততততততততততততত

Pt.2

Hi! It’s me! The author lolol. I didn’t expect this to be as long as it did but I have plans to write a PT.2 so don’t ya worry bout a thing! I just figured it’d be better to write a separate part as this became pretty lengthy.

Dunno if it’ll be as long as this one but I hope you enjoyed it either way< 3,

I’ll probably upload this on ao3 as well!

I haven’t written anything I’ve published in quite a long long time. Which includes other fandoms I’m in. So if I missed important tags feel free to let me know and I apologize for any mistakes I may have made!

I don’t plan to fix any errors until after I finish part 2. Should have it maybe by the end of the day or tomorrow! Who knows

OH AND IM OPENING REQUESTS IF YALL WANNA SLIDE THRU

Side note: do y’all think satan would listen to “What Was I Made For?” On blast ??? Or

60 notes · View notes

beelsfridge · 9 months

Text

Goodbye (For Now) Pt.2

Pt.1

Nightbringer Spoilers Ahead (maybe a little ooc)

Tags:(Angst/TBD)(TimeTravel)(SayingGoodbye)(hurt/comfort)

(Idk how to tag properly)

///

Synopsis:

You knew you weren’t suppose to stay in the past for that long. You knew you didn’t belong there. You had to get back to your time eventually.

And even if the brothers were warming up to you again, you had to say goodbye. The worst part was that they would never know why you really left.

“They mean forever Mammon. It means they’re never coming back.”

“Huh?! What are ya saying Satan?! Stop bullshitting!” Mammon yells at him.

You could feel all eyes on you stare you down in confusion.

“He’s right Mammon..”You say in a less enthusiastic tone than before. Mammon lols betrayed by your words as he steps back away from you.

“You’re leaving?…”Leviathan says with clear disappointment.

“I am..”You say as the air grows thick around you.

It’s quiet. A tension between you and the brothers that quickly becomes suffocating until Asmo throws himself toward you.

“You can’t leave!” Asmo yells out as he clings onto your arm,”You can’t! Who else will let me talk about myself and agree with everything I say?!”

“Asmo…”You say with a pained expression as you look to the others.

Beels eyes can’t meet yours as he mumbled something about no longer being hungry while Belphie mutters something about having a bad dream.

“Why?!” Satan says grabbing you by the collar of your RAD uniform as he yanks you from Asmo in anger,”You’re suppose to be our attendant! You can’t just leave!”

“Satan let them go you’re going to hurt them!” Asmo says.

Satan doesn’t move his grip from you and all you could feel is the anger and resentment radiate off of him.

You try to come up with a believable excuse. After all, they can never truly know why.

But why are they acting this way?

“Diavolo said I’d be your attendant until you’ve all adjusted to being in Devildom…” You tell him as you avoid eye contact,”And you’ve all adjusted to your lives here already so…”

“Bullshit!” He tells you immediately,”That’s not the reason and you know it! Tell me the truth!”

“Oi Satan! Calm down!” Mammon says.

“I can’t stand being here anymore.” Levi says bitterly.

“Let me go Satan..”You tell him with a sad expression.

You can see his angry expression change to one with guilt as he lets his grip on you go hesitantly.

“I just don’t …understand why...” He tells you.

You don’t respond to him. You didn’t think they’d be this upset over you leaving.

After all…they always didn’t seem to care when you were requested to appear at the House. Would it have been better to have just disappeared and not say anything like Solomon wanted?

You feel a gentle touch on your hand,”Don’t go MC..” Mammon tells you with a sad expression.

“I’m sorry Mammon..”You say pulling away from his touch,”Maybe you guys will understand one day…”

“Then why not help us understand now?…”Belphie asks,”Why?…” He seems hurt by your words,”Did we mean so little to you?.. sure..we weren’t ..best of friends ..and expressing ourselves hasn’t been easy..but ..didn’t we mean something at least?…”

“Of course you did. ….You don’t know how much.” You say honestly,” Truth be told…i was never meant to say goodbye ..the plan was to just disappear without ever saying a word.”

“That’s cruel.” Beel tells you.

“You were just gonna leave us and not saying anything?” Levi says hurt by your words,”Who does that…?”

“Would it have been better that way?” You ask them honestly,

“Of course not!” Asmo tells you.

Belphie shakes his head in disbelief,” I can’t believe this conversation is happening.” Beel hums in agreement.

This didn’t make sense. Sometimes you’d go days without seeing them and when you did reappear you were hardly acknowledged unless you were in the midst of their schemes. And let’s not forget the whole reveal fiasco that occurred.

“I don’t understand.” You tell them,” I thought you guys…didn’t like me?”

“What’s MC blabbering about-“ Mammom says clearly confused,”We care. Did you not pick up on it?”

“You ..”You say confusingly,”You….you care about me?”

“Of course we do!” Mammon says angrily,”Where did you get the idea we didn’t?!”

Been hums in agreement.

“Oh…” was all the words you made out. Did you just misunderstand? Or did you not notice that these versions of the brothers had different ways of showing they cared about you?

Oh..

You could feel the hot tears begin to fall down your cheeks,”Well..cause I was a demon and then I lied about it so I assumed…. “

Everyone looks at you with sad and tearful expression as you start to cry.

Levi has a surprised look on his face,”H-hey wait -don’t do that.”

“Waaa! Don’t cry MC! You’re gonna make me cry!” Asmo says as he hugs you lovingly as his face begins to tear up.

“I’m ..”you say between sobs,”I’m so grateful to have met you guys. I’m really going to miss you all.”

“When you say it like that..”Mammon voices breaks as he attempts to hold back his emotions,”Ah dammit MC, ya making me all emotional.”

“And we will miss you as well.” Another voice speaks out from behind.

“Lucifer?..”You say trying to stop your tears as you turn to his direction.

His expression is soft yet still stern. However in his eyes holds glints of sadness at your appearance.

He sighs deeply,”I had a feeling ..that this day would...” He tells you.

“but I was also hoping…”He says his eyebrows furrow,”that it would never come…” He says with a disappointed tone.

He looks at his brothers before looking at you.

He sighs as he grabs ahold of your hands,”I’m not the best, when it comes to expressing my true feelings..however..I think I can speak for all of us when I say..we are thankful for all you’ve done for us… you made the transition of living here, in the Devildom, easier. And We couldn’t have done it..without you…”

You can’t recall a time where he’s ever been this honest. But his words seem to Pierce your heart completely as you feel your eye bubble up again with tears.

“We will be sad…to see you go…”He tells you squeezing your hands tightly for a brief moment.

You can’t help it! It’s all just too much!

You find yourself hugging Lucifer tightly as the tears stain your cheeks. After a few moments you feel a hand pat your head gently.

“Thank you..”You whisper to him. You didn’t know how badly you needed to hear him say those words to you.

When you pull away you look at everyone else. While you’re sad that you have to leave them. You know they’ll be waiting to see you again.

One by one, you hug each and everyone one of them. Reminding them that they are just as important to you as you are to them.

You remind Belphie that if he ever has trouble sleeping again -to look to the stars and count as many as he can because somewhere out there you’ll be looking at them too.

You tell Beel to avoid eating foods that will upset his stomach and that if he ever feels an uncontrollable hunger to think of silly sad stories about that food. He tells you he’ll try. And you smile because that’s all that matters.

You tell Asmo that when he starts to feel insecure about himself that he needs to your words and chant them to himself until he no longer feels that way.

You remind Satan that he’s doing his best. And one day he’ll realize how far he’s come. And if he ever feels angry, to look at the cats in the yard and befriend them.

You look at Levi, he seems so upset. After all, he thought you’d be friends forever. But you remind him, that you are always going to be friends. No matter where you go, and you tell him that if he ever feels lonely, he needs to remember he has brothers who love him just as he is.

When you break apart from Mammons he pulls you right back in. You feel him hold onto you for his dear life. You feel his body tremble against yours.. and in a quiet whisper remind Mammon that he needs to keep his buttery fingers away from trouble and he laughs. And you tell him, that he is the glue for all his brothers. That he needs to remember he’s just as important as everyone else. That he has to look out for them because they’d be lost without him. He responds with a cocky”I know.” Before he lets your hand go with the last thing he feels is the touch of your fingertips.

And finally you get to Lucifer. Despite his cold touch and attitude, his hug is quite warm.

He tells you with a whisper as he kisses your top of your hand ,” if you should ever need a job as an attendant.” you’d know where to find him. Causing you to both laugh quietly amongst each other. As you pull away from him he grabs your arm gently back.

His eyes say it all.

“Don’t go.”

You grab ahold of his hands and hold them gently in yours with a reassuring squeeze.

And in a quiet whisper….

You bow respectfully to Lucifer.

His head runs circles at your words as he bows back.

“At least send a postcard or sum Yknow.” Mammom wipes his tears with a murmur agreements following his statement.

“That might be a little difficult -“ You tell him with a reassuring smile,”But I’ll try.”

“Don’t worry.” Another voice says. You turn to see Solomon standing there with a smile,” they’re in good hands. I’ll be sure, to pass their messages onto you all.” He extends his hand out to you.

You take it with a smile,”I can go home?” You ask him with hopeful eyes.

“It’ll be like you never left.” He tells you with a knowing smile.

“Alright then… I guess….“You say as you turn back to the brothers.

“Goodbye, for now.”

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me leviathan #om! leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me belphegor #obey me lucifer #obey me beelzebub #obey me mammon #obey me diavolo #satan obey me #obey me angst #obey me mc #goodbye for now (pt2)#pt2 #I tried to make this gender neutral #but I’m so used to writing in a she/her perspective #so if you see an error let me know so I can fix it!

136 notes · View notes

beelsfridge · 9 months

Text

Goodbye (For Now)

Nightbringer Spoilers Ahead (maybe a little ooc)

Tags:(Angst/TBD)(TimeTravel)(SayingGoodbye)

(I’ll adjust everything in the morning)

(Pt 1/2)

Synopsis:

You knew you weren’t suppose to stay in the past for that long. You knew you didn’t belong there. You had to get back to your time eventually.

And even if the brothers were warming up to you again, you had to say goodbye. The worst part was that they would never know why you really left.

“You can finally go back home MC.” Solomon tells you with a smile as he holds your hands with joy,”Back to your time. You did it.”

“Yeah!” You say with relief,”I can go back, back home where the people I love are waiting for me.” You can’t help but feel your heart flutter at the warmth and comfort of the brothers and everyone else you longed for.

“There’s no time to lose! It’ll happen just as quickly, Just as before-“ Solomon says ready to perform the ritual before you find yourself hesitating.

“Wait-“ You say,”Shouldn’t I say goodbye?” You ask conflicted.

“Say goodbye? MC they can’t know where you’re from. We talked about this already-“ Solomon said,”You need not to worry about these versions of themselves anymore.

“Yeah but…” You say as you look to the House of Lamentation,”But even if they don’t know it’s me yet…this version of myself..I’m still their friend. They deserve to know, that I won’t be coming back ” You tell him.

“Oh MC…”Solomon looks at with with what you feel is pity,”These are not the brothers you know…chances are they probably won’t even care or notice you’re gone..”

You look down at the floor, a saddened expression taken place,”Yeah..you’re probably right..they probably didn’t really even care..”

Solomon sighs deeply as he contemplates your words. After a few moments he squeezes your hand reassuringly,”I think…you should do what you desire… if you believe Lucifer and his brothers deserve sort closure then I suppose I can’t stop you. Just hurry back…for my sake.”

Your eyes light up with joy as you hug Solomon lovingly,”You’re the best!”

“Obviously.” He says patting your back before you break away.

“Alright! I’ll be back real quick alright!” You say as you hurry to the House of Lamentation.

“I’ll be waiting.” Solomon says watching you scurry off.

Normally, at least in this timeline, you wouldn’t really go to the house of lamentation without proper reason and permission.

So you hope Lucifer or someone would at least let you in.

Does the house look a lot bigger or have you just not seen it in a while?

You look back at the door, hesitantly you knock three times. You wait anxiously for any sort of response and when time passed and nobody answered you felt quite defeated.

“I guess…Solomon..was right..” You mumble to yourself a bit disappointedly. Just as you were about to walk away the door cracked open.

You hesitantly reach for it and peek inside.

“H-hello?” You say not wanting to intrude more than you have to.

Nonetheless you step into the house fully. Despite it looking just slightly different, it still felt like home to you.

You take a breath of relief before a voice startles you.

“Ah? - Oh! It’s you, ya weirdo what are you doing here?!” Mammon stares at you confusingly,”Who let ya in?”

“I well- I knocked and the door opened so I wasn’t really sure if I could come in or not or if someone let me in by mistake so I walk in here to see if there was anyone but I didn’t see anyone so I was gonna leave but then -“You begin to ramble before Mammon cuts you off.

“Oi, quit ya yappin. I don’t care.” Mammon tells you.

“Right.” You say,”Sorry.”

“You’re so weird.” Mammon says shaking his head disapprovingly,”But I guess you’re here for a reason eh? What can the great Mammon do for you? Ya need to see Luci or sum?”

“Well yeah- but also I came to see you! Also everyone else.” You tell him.

“M-me?!” Mammon says with utter confusion. It seems he decided to skip over the part you said everyone else as well.

“Yeah, there was something I needed to tell you-“ You tell him.

“T-tell me ? “ Mammons head begins to swirl,”Me? Why me?

“Well Mammon, it’s just that I’ve came ti say go-“You tell him before getting caught off by another voice.

“MAMMON!” Leviathan screams out as he approaches,”Where’s my damn money!”

“Jeez Levi, could you be any louder?!” Mammon scolds,”I’m in the middle of something here!”

“I don’t care - gimme my money!” Levi says before realizing it’s you.

“Huh?? MC?! You’re here?!” Levi seems surprised by your visit,.

“Oh! Levi! This is great- I needed to tell you both that-“ You say before yet another voice cuts you off.

“Ah~ what’s with all the yelling~ you’re all bound to get wrinkles like that- oh- MC?” Asmo says coming into view as he looks at you curiously,” What are you doing here?”

“Ah you’re here! Perfect ! - I came to -“ You say before Mammon cuts you off.

“Cant y’all see MC is trying to have a proper conversation with ME? Butt out.” Mammon says

“Mammon, you’re so full of yourself.” Levi says bitterly.

“Ay! Watch what you say!” Mammon says.

“Ugh you guys, MC is trying to say something. “ Asmo says

“Right..thanks Asmo..I was going to say that-“

“Can you all kindly shut the hell up?” Satan says marching into the room,”You’re all irritating me! I can hear shouting from halfway across the house.”

“Everything was fine until Levi and Asmo came in tryna be nosey!” Mammon tells Satan.

“I don’t care! Just shut up already-“Satan says before looking at you and his anger briefly replaced by confusion,”It’s you?”

Before you can say anything another voice pops in “Oh would you look at that Beel. I told you they were arguing. “ Belphie says yawning tiredly,”Could recognize Mammons annoying voice far that much of a distance.”

“Hey!”

Beel Hums in agreement as his stomach growls,”Mm yeah, it sure does seem that way. I suppose since MC is here that’s why they’re arguing.”

“Oh- you’re right. I didn’t even see MC til you said it.” Belphie says with a chuckle,”What brings you here? Normally Lucifer would’ve thrown a huge fuss anytime someone came over about being on our best behavior. So I assume he doesn’t know you’re here.”

“R-right-“ You say as they all look at you curiously. Suddenly it feels a little harder to say what you have to.

“I don’t see why the rest of ya need to be here. MC said she wanted to speak to me and-“Mammon starts off but gets cut off

“She did not say that you liar!” Levi says,”She clearly said me.”

“That’s not what I heard!” Asmo says as they all start arguing once more.

“I’m hungry.” Beel says.

“Is that really the only thing you’re concerned about right now?” Belphie asks.

Why does feel…so familiar to you?…it almost ..feels like when-

“So why are you here MC?” Satan asks (demands) gathering the attention of the others and knocking you out of your thoughts.

“Oh that’s…..right…” You says.

“Well spit it out, we don’t got all day now.” Mammon says growing increasingly impatient.

You look at all of them as they stare at you with such a familiar twinkle in their eyes. One that you thought you’d never really see again.

“I’ve…”You say bowing your head down,”I’ve come to say goodbye.”

It’s grows eerily quiet.

“Uh…okay?” Mammon says shrugging his shoulders,”You going on vacation or sum?”

You shake your head,”No, I’m leaving Mammon.”

“For how long?” Mammon asks again not quite grasping your words.

“I ..well-“ You say unsure of what to tell them as you twiddle your fingers together.

“Like a couple months or ?” Mammon waits for your answer.

You could feel everyone’s stare bore into your skin as they await your answer.

You hear Satan sigh,

“They mean forever Mammon. It means they’re never coming back.”

#part 2??#sorry for spelling errors #I’ll fix it in the #morning #I wrote this at 4 in the morning #obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me leviathan #om! leviathan #obey me mammon #obey me beelzebub #obey me diavolo #obey me asmodeus #satan obey me #obey me belphegor #obey me lucifer #obey me solomon #obeymeangst #obey me x mc

85 notes · View notes