#🫁.vent

[faetreides]

.

#tw r4p3 #will i ever let a man touch me again without seeing him as someone else? who knows! #and wanting to throw up and kms? idk #i guess because sex is such a common thing for ppl my age #but i don’t even know if i could ever have it again without having a panic attack #i go from being hypersexual to wanting no one to touch me ever again in any way #even my family #i think my body is disgusting and i avoid looking in the mirror #📜.scrolls #🫁.vent

[borderline-culture-is]

// vent-ish suspected bpd culture is your fp telling u ab one of their boundaries ("stop saying x, it makes me confused and uncomfy") and then almost relapsing (which you only didnt do because you cant find your blade.) because you think you've completely ruined your relationship with fp and hate yourself and just wish you were never born

-🫁

.

#suspected bpd culture is #suspected bpd culture #suspected bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd culture is #bpd culture #bpd safe #bpd #fp #bpd fp #fp bpd #tw vent #cw vent #- 🫁

[npdvents]

Hey, thanks so much for responding to me last time! Sorry to come back here to vent but god I'm so frustrated right now

My friends keep saying things like "oh, I haven't eaten since yesterday" or "I haven't eaten in four days", like they're proud of it, sometimes they complain about it even though it's a choice. I don't feel bad for them. I understand it could be some kind of ED, but it's so frustrating for me because my family is going through financial issues and my mother can hardly afford food, I'm starving a lot of the time and it's not something I can choose. I don't want to tell them to stop saying this, as I think it'd make me seem insensitive or rude or something, but I can't fucking stand it. I know they can afford food, I see hem buy things for themselves and stuff pretty often, and im so jealous. I know others can have problems but god I just hate it when my friends have problems too. I don't want to hear about other peoples suffering when I myself am suffering. You know?

-🫀🫁

As someone with an ED who has been struggling to become healthy (especially as of late cause I quit nicotine and realized I had been using it to suppress my appetite) and also as someone who financially struggles, these statements annoy the crap out of me. I’m sorry you’re going through that. If I were you I’d ask them to stop saying it at least around me, yknow?

#npd vent #🫀🫁 anon #actually narcissistic #actually npd #cluster b safe #narcissistic personality disorder #npd safe #npd

[borderline-vents]

god imagine getting obsessed and mad over someone who never responds when you have lots of other people who would be more than happy to talk to you and be friends with you couldnt be me thats so cringe /sarc

-🫁

.

#borderline vent #🫁

[hazyaltcare]

This is more just a vent and an idk where to go from here. I made a blog that's kinda popular in flag edits and moodboards, and I love it. Thing is, I made it in 2017/2018 when I was an anti. I'm a proshipper now but I don't think I can change the vibe of the blog. All my mods are antis and I just have to deal. Idk what I can even do but I just kinda wanted to vent, thank you for listening.

The thing is man, you don't just gotta deal. Thats why i made this blog. Thats why i dont fuck with antis anymore. That toxicity bled into my life, and when i was working on a blog that was "anyone could interact", i kept seeing antis requesting things from me, loving the things i make and I kept thinking to myself "if they knew anything about me, they'd tell me to kill myself. They're just using me." Sorry if thats dark, but thats honestly how i feel about the subject.

Dont feel like you have to cater to toxic people. Make a new edit blog thats proship friendly. You'd be surprised at the amount of traction you'd get in a small amount of time (the proship community is very underserved). Hell, ill even promote your new blog if ya @ us.

For us, being openly proship has been so freeing and gratifying, like a weight has been lifted. Its worth it, even if it may cause a little hellstorm at first because of all the pearl clutchers.

Anyways, whatever you decide to do, i'm sorry you feel stuck in your current position. Making things for cruel people hurts, and i've been through that pain.

Wishing you the best,

Mod Haze (🫁Rob)

#vent #confession #tw discourse #tw suicide baiting #🫁 #mod haze

[yermes]

PAC: 🫁

Lessons from a rot girlie moment

I had a rot girl day after a rough trip. My parents consolation prize to me was the 2 1/2 lb box of pretzels from costco and I can confirm they are amazing. But what does your rot girl era teach you? I always find that when I am rotting it does give my mind time to think, process, and grieve and enables me to think more clearly about my next steps.

Disclaimer: please take what I say with a grain of salt and not as the gospel. I just want to share some ideas of practicing and giving advice using the medium as often as I can with school, work, and my own personal studies and practice. But I am working on sharing my notes soon so that will be exciting!

Socials: TipJar | Insta

Pick a meme

The cards

Pile 1

Whip + mountains 🏔️ 🪢

You realize your anger and your negative emotions can cause blockages in both your physical life and none physical. The best part of rotting is sometimes you need to be honest with yourself and assess your faults which are holding you back.

Pile 2

House + Mice 🐁 🏠 

You better recognize the worry and stress your loved ones give you and that your home gives you. Sometimes stress manifests is grotesque ways which lurk within your house and sometimes its caused by the excess of work you need to do and sometimes its family. Recognize it.

Pile 3

Tower + Cross 🏰 ⛪️

While rotting you recognize the anguish the big organizations cause in your life. Such as school, work, government. You were not put on this earth to suffer and you living isn’t a punishment. While rotting ponder the best way to go about living in this current reality.

Extras: 💤

Story/vent:

Going to do my nightly rituals and go to bed I love you ❤️

#suitlifeofgerm #askgerm #pick a card #daily card #pick a picture #shadow work #germ reads #pac #tarotoftheday #pick a image #pick a pile #pick a reading #pick a deck #daily card pull #pick a photo #pick an image #lenormand #cartomancy #divination #tarot community #tarot witch #free tarot #tarot deck #daily tarot #tarot reading #tarot #tarot cards #tarot blog #tarotblr #tarotcommunity

[sleep-knot]

💎 INTRODUCTION 💎

💎 ABOUT ME 💎

☆ Tripp

☆ Bi/Trans/Ace

☆ He/They/Star/Pup

☆ Taken ᡣ𐭩

☆ I have anxiety, depression, and dyslexia

☆ 18

☆ 16+

☆ Lot of music related bullshit

☆ I draw sometimes

☆ Can be NSFW

☆ Use my submission box, spam me, and message me all you want, i love it!

💎 ALT ACCOUNTS 💎

☆ Slipknot account @slipknot-brainrot 🫐

☆ Sid Wilson account @sidwilsonsbitch 🍋

☆ Psychopathic Records account @shaggs-2-dope 🪓

☆ Eminem account @marshall-mybackhurts 🍥

☆ Afterdark account @sleep-knotafterdark 📽

☆ Aesthetics account @archiving-aesthetics 🎀

☆ Writing account @loved-witha-love 🧷

☆ Jmetal/Jrock/Jpop account @gimmie-medicine 🗝

☆ Agere account @sleepystarb0y 🪽

☆ Vent account @sleepy-vents 🔪

💎 FRIEND TAGS 💎

☆ Justice 🦇 tag for @dave-nutstaine / @cherri-vixen

☆ Moon 🌸 tag for @ihugmomo

☆ Kaede 🪽 tag for @homuradefender

☆ Craig 🫁 tag for @craigjones-marry-me-plz

☆ Skye 🐰 🕸 tag for @spookybunie

💎 SOCIALS 💎

Spotify

Pinterest

#introduction #rambles #intro post #bluey #bluey heeler #bingo heeler #bandit heeler #hello kitty #sanrio #slipknot #sid wilson #dj starscream #babymetal #momometal #momoko okazaki #moametal #moa kikuchi #sumetal #suzuka nakamoto #justice 🦇 #moon 🌸 #kaede 🪽 #sleep token #sleep token ii #ii #craig 🫁 #skye 🐰 🕸

[prestonmonterey]

🫀 or 🫁 for emojis

hmmm

🫀

bc i have A Thing for anatomical hearts

i was actually drawing them today

idk it just became my like comfort/destress/vent kinda drawing bc i can draw them from memory semi anatomically correct and its easier than drawing faces bc people cant tell me im wrong bc i just drew an anatomical heart from memory /silly

also idk i like the pink in the heart better than in the lung (idk if the emojis are exactly consistent between devices but this is what they look like for me)

#marble asks

[rxttenslutcemeterysys]

── 🦴 "Decaying Hounds Collective" ⚰️ ──

Collective name~ 🕸️; Graves, Decay Collective pronoun set~ 🌙 ; he | it | thing Collective labels~ 🌕 ; omnisexual(male lean/pref) | transgender(masc) | ambiamorous

🔪 system headcount~ ; 600+ 🪦 system origin~ ; Traumagenic 🫀 hosts~ ; Mr. Plant | Gutz | Hound | Bane/Mayuko

☁︎ ╮"but without the dark, we'd never see the stars"╭ ☁︎

🧠 diagnosed with,, ~ ; MDD, ADHD, C-PTSD, and Bipolar

👻 suspecting of,, ~ ; DID, BPD, ED, OCD, Insomnia, and Autism

🫁 self diagnosed with,, ~ ; HPD

"in the depths of darkness, love shines the brightest." ☁︎‎‎‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚‎‎‧₊˚☁︎

🌑 system partners name ~ ; Rjabion, RJ

🌕 system partners pronouns ~ ; he | fang | vamp| they

< 12/24/2023 3 "take me back,, to,, the night we met,," 🌙

🌑 system partners name ~ ; The Crowz Library/Crowz

🌕 system partners pronouns ~ they | faye | it | sie | hem

< 11/11/2023 3 "take me back,, to,, the night we met,," 🌙

🌑 system partners name ~ ; The Merlin Society, Merlin, Marlo

🌕 system partners pronouns ~ ; he | they

< 11/25/2023 3 "take me back,, to,, the night we met,," 🌙

🌑 system partners name ~ ; A Collection Of Stardust , Ace , Oliver

🌕 system partners pronouns ~ ; he | they

< 12/15/2023 3 "take me back,, to,, the night we met,," 🌙

🕷️ ── "love will have its sacrifices…" ── 🦷 Freq. Fronters/hosts Mr Plant |,,| Ageless Adult |,,| He/It/Thing |,,| Host , Warden Alter

Gutz |,,| Ageless Adult |,,| He/It/Thing |,,| Host , Protector

Ghost |,,| 17 |,,| He/They/It/Wing/Cloud/Thing |,,| Persecutor , Mood Swings Holder

Will Solace |,,| 16 |,,| He/It |,,| Trauma Holder , Mood Booster

👁️ Extras,, 🫁

╭ DNI

if you are lgbtq+ phobic(includes aroa and aces)

if you fakeclaim or reality check

if you are a very strict Christian/Catholic and you try to push it onto others.

╭BYI

We cuss a lot and use slurs we CAN reclaim. (Ex, faggot, retard, tranny)

We collectively are a nonthiestic satanist

We are neutral on the topic on non-traumagenic systems. Don't bring up or ask about it unless you are going to be polite.

identities bc yes?

emotion wheel bc its helpful

!! socials

please make sure to tell us either on the app or in dms here that you followed/etc on these :)

X ( twitter ) - @/decayinghounds

tiktok ; @/decayinghoundscoll

instagram ; @/slutforfictionalkillers

pinterest ; @/decayinghoundssys

snapchat ; @/localhorrorshow

simplyplural ; @/decayinghoundscoll (<- still doing heavy work on it, restarted on a new account)

discord; ask for it

general blogs owned by us..

@tiny-remains - syskid/agere/petre/agedre/petdre blog

@decayingintros - our intros

@ghostixart - collective, but mainly ghosts art blog

@horrificinformation - collective writing blog. (quick warning, this account will have 'problemmatic' fandoms/media on it. a lot of our writing is more-so our thoughts/notes on research on our special interests, so far we've wrote more movie reviews and informational posts than fanfiction and actual stories)

@abnormalcultureis - abnormal culture :]

@rottingventbook - vent blog

personal sysmate blogs...

@strzit - stardust / ⭐'s blog

@mrsunshineboy - will solace / 🔆's blog

@voidless-thoughts - Mr. Plant / MP's blog

@paranoidkittycat - virgil's blog

@exotic-kalle - kalle's blog

@snowicangel - angel dust / ❄️'s blog

@y3ll0wgutziii - yellow's blog

salix / 🎃's blog , ask for it

salem's blog , ask for it

#did system #actually did #did osdd #dissociative identity disorder #medically recongized

[faetreides]

about commissions/semi hiatus (fine to ignore)

sorry if this is weird or off putting to anybody, but there might be some radio silence for a good bit since i’ve decided to put myself into overdrive to get more work out so i can set up commissions. because of my health and other factors, i can’t work a physical job so this would be my only way of making money and i’m just in a desperate situation but i wanted to have a way for people to generally support me too. my single mother is currently the only one supporting my family since my d*d won’t pay child support and we have no other relatives who will help. we’re constantly low on food, drinks, clothes, we have no cookware or dish soap, and we have to spend a lot of money on laundromats because we can’t afford to fix our dryer right now. my mom is considering a second job but her health is also poor so i’m stressed and scrambling trying to help her make ends meet as well as just live a day to day life. i want to have more examples of my writing in case anyone decides to commission me because i don’t feel like what i have up currently is enough. but i’m currently off my medication and can’t see a doctor to get back on it atm so my ass is getting kicked. i’m very grateful for the support i’ve received on my writing so far and i just wanted to say that no matter what i do not want to seem like i’m forcing anyone to support me in this way. this is just a notice. i would really appreciate if you would spread the word or take interest in commissioning me when the option/post becomes available, thank you so much for reading this if you did.

#📜.scrolls #🫁.vent #kind of #idk i just feel like i have to prove myself and my worst fear is something happening to my mom again #the stress is fucking up my alredy shitty heart anyway but yeah #hopefully you guys can understand where i’m coming from? #eldest child guilt is real #this is so awkward i’m sorry

[n4talia-chaparro]

<< 1 || next (2) >>

Yeah hello I'm glad I had the opportunity to finish this garbage for once so hopefully I don't screw this up-

Reminder: I will make a next post for Cap cuz I don't wanna make it very long so-

Yippee but first...👇🏻 (1/2??)

Contains- Blood/gore (?), mention of murder (?), abuse???, cringe AU, poor grammar, etc.

🫀 || ꒷꒦︶🩸︶︶꒷꒦︶∪∪︶꒷꒦︶︶🩸︶꒷꒦ || 🫀

₊˚꒰🫁⸝⸝︰ 𝐆𝐏!𝐊𝐫𝐮𝐩𝐩 ┆ ⤿ 🧠 ⌗

✧ ┊• uhh I don't know what to put but he's a silly little bastard.

✧ ┊• He may be 5'8 or almost the same height as the original Krupp. Some of the students say he's bigger than a damn tree but that's not the case. Just a bit bigger or shorter compared to Mr. Meaner/Kenny and Mr. Ree/Toilette (?)

✧ ┊• In case anyone forgot, Krupp in this AU is a manipulative and aggressive person. At first, he might be neutral but eventually, he will slowly show his real colors. No matter what the victim does or says, Krupp will do anything to manipulate, gaslight, and make the victim miserable. Even if he seems "nice" or not, he shouldn't be trusted by a student or staff (especially if they are new to the school)

✧ ┊•His face can change when he's mad (well also snap and get more aggressive than ever.) He then realized that students will be more scared of him so he feels chill keeping the face like that (unless he needs to rest or pretend to be nice so he had to turn his face "normal" without letting no one see his terrifying face.) And goes to his voice too. His voice goes deep or glitchy.

✧ ┊• Krupp is a human in this au- the only reason why his face looks like that is because Melvin accidentally shot him with his new invention so um let me explain instead

Melvin's intention was to make a teacher smarter since the substitute teacher (Jerry) is getting on his nerves and didn't understand why he's working there so he built the "SmartyyChanger200" and decided to show it to his principal.

Krupp like a total fucking idiot he is in the damn show decided to grab it from Melvin's hands and wanted to see if it can heat up anything- Melvin's got mad and tried to get it back- it was like a silly ass tug of war except they were fighting over the invention and pulling it back and forth until it slipped out and Melvin accidentally pressed something that caused the SmartyyChanger2000 to shot his principal in the face. NOTHING bad happened to Krupp, he got unconscious by it, and idk what else. Melvin thought it didn't shoot him so he shrugged it off and left the office to test it on Jerry.

Krupp did NOT turn into a vampire like Jessica, or a random creature (or monster) that happened to some other people like Mr. Fyde and others. He simply woke up and thought he fall asleep on the floor.

And it took him a few weeks to turn him into a villain since his mind or well his "brain" was developing and functioning. And it was before he murder his first victim, Ms. Hurd. (Well I have spoiled the au for y'all)

- his IQ is similar to Melvin's except it's worst than smart. Aggressively smarter than an average staff so far. 🧍‍♀️

✧ ┊• He's a walking red flag ! ! (Pls be aware of that LMFAO💀💀)

✧ ┊• Not only does he change his face (or appearance) he is capable of breaking things. Whether it is wood, bricks, or any sort of material he will get through them just like he did on the 2nd episode of the 1st season 👁👁 and this motherfucker fits on the damn vent. Don't even ask me- um...I don't know how to explain the logic of this one. 🗿

✧ ┊• Unlike the show (well the original Mr. Krupp), this Krupp seems smart and knowledgeable. However, he does everything to avoid getting caught which it was a success for him.

✧ ┊•GP! Krupp has also developed an obsession with murder and cooking stuff. Although he's taking a break from guacamole and salami, he enjoys trying new things and using some of his "special ingredients" for the food. Of course, he even used the ingredients to serve the WHOLE school without letting them know what they are eating is human flesh and mea-  OH FUCK I MEAN UM very cool ingredients!! Um..yeah cool....???

Yeah so epic..umm GP!Krupp will always hide the ingredients and keep it a secret without letting a single student or staff know except for Melvin. He is forced to work with Krupp and knows exactly about the "special ingredients". 👁👁💦 and that's how he gets rid of the bodies.

And he does NOT eat human meat. I mean unless he wants to make a trip-tip roast for himself and get it from the body- (and using blood as a silly dip for the French fries who fucking knows -)

꒷︶໑꒦₊꒷꒥︶꒥꒷︶‧₊˚ଓ︶꒷꒷꒦꒥໑꒷੭︶︶꒥

✧ ┊• Although people would call him Benjamin or Benny, he prefers to be called Ben for short. But hey he still doesn't mind being called by his real name or any weird nicknames.

✧ ┊• GP!Krupp still has a soft spot for his nephew, Kipper. Our dear buddy Kipper is UNAWARE of his uncle's gruesome behavior, he simply wanted to visit him and GP!Krupp had to hide some corpses in his cellar and lock it in case his nephew tries to get in without his permission. He does not wanna upset and scare Kipper if he lets him witness the things he had done to the people.

✧ ┊• He hates everything that is around him, why of course just like the original Krupp. He hates children and stuff that is associated with "fun" but there are other things that he hates the most; loud sounds/noises and possums. It's not like he seems like a weakness or anything

✧ ┊• And speaking of weaknesses, he does have some that are strange but maybe silly such as:

- Loud noises? (air horn, kids laughing, giggling, and TV statics.)

- Bee sting

- Anything associated with "cuteness" and "adorable" themes

- Children (from kindergarten to 3rd grade)

"Is he really that scared of children? really?" Not really but when it comes to kids who are in kindergarten, it makes him sick in the stomach and personally scared- and there's a little good example

💕•example: Heidi

You may ask yourself what she has anything to do with this part. Well, you see, since Heidi is very small and childish like the other kids from kindergarten, somehow managed to make GP!Krupp more uncomfortable around the children. Sure, he also wanted to get rid of her to see Harold's reaction, but unfortunately, Heidi makes it more difficult and uneasy for GP!Krupp to kill her. She would also give him some small hitting, kicking, and punches when she's angry at him- soo GP!Krupp would easily give up and ignore her instead of killing her.

꒷︶໑꒦₊꒷꒥︶꒥꒷︶‧₊˚ଓ︶꒷꒷꒦꒥໑꒷੭︶︶꒥

✧ ┊• His relationship with others isn't that bad, some of the relationship (well friends or exes idfk)

- George and Harold: a disaster. He will end up killing them for sure

- Staff members: holy shit, I don't know! Krupp is aware one of them will backstab him and escape

- Toilette & Jerry: a pain in the fucking ass. Krupp seriously wanna fucking kill them so badly mostly Jerry. Jerry is the other reason why Krupp had enough of being patient meanwhile Toilette is a fucking scumbag to Krupp. I mean they have a valid reason to hate his guts but dear lord. Just them fighting seem silly and weird.

- Edith [1st ex]: OHHH....this is getting fire....ummm...- Krupp's 1st relationship wasn't terrible. Edith is kind and sweet but since Krupp fell for Ms. Yewh then they broke up but that doesn't mean they will be friends or anything. They will meet up again except Edith knows exactly what he did after Tara/Ms. Ribble explained the situation um shut.

-Ms. Yewh [2nd ex]: YIKES.. big ass dumpster fire. After breaking up with Edith, he found out Ms. Yewh and Toilette aren't together so uh Krupp took the time to date her for once- weeks or months has passed and they broke up. Oops. Which I don't know if Ms. Yewh will be next dead victim or the alive ex. Who knows. I don't wanna spill the info 💀

- Melvin: oh boy....this poor little bastard...damn... I would say his relationship with him isn't that good, I would say it's very toxic. Krupp ALWAYS sees him as a son to him but he enjoys harming him in the physical, verbal, and emotional ways to get his anger out. Sure Melvin may be an assistant or teacher's pet but he is more than that. A source of entertainment and a punching bag to his principal. cuz that's how his mom (Bernice) treated him when he was a kid and since Krupp sees Melvin like a son and not a student like he used to, probably he would do the same to him, giving Melvin trauma and PTSD on purpose (haha um get it? Mother and son moment? No? Ok, that was too far my bad.)

🧠 || ꒷꒦︶🦴︶︶꒷꒦︶∪∪︶꒷꒦︶︶🦴︶꒷꒦ || 🧠

✧ ┊• He cares about his job, image, and reputation a lot. If a staff member witnes a tragic event and tries to spread the information, GP!Krupp will eliminate the staff. And you may ask how will he do that. Simple MURDER- *COUGH* FUCK *COUGH* - damn too many gory eliminations? Yeah, how unexpected and silly of him.

✧ ┊• He despite Jerry a lot with a burning passion. Even tho he didn't have the chance to kill him but still. He's still thinking about getting rid of him as well once he gets rid of George and Harold.

✧ ┊• SUSSY SUS AMOGU- I MEAN I MEAN. He makes sure to keep everything hidden- ummm he still wants his rule book to be safe so uh yeah he still owns the damn "safe".

✧ ┊• "Fuck you, I can't stop it's so satisfying!!!" -GP!Krupp

✧ ┊•Like I said GP!Krupp would see Melvin as a son and still treats him terribly. But deep down inside he has a soft spot for him as well. Since Melvin is his assistant or his son figure, he always teaches him some stuff in case if GP!Krupp gets himself arrested or ends up disappearing from his life.

Teaching the kid some stuff like:

- how to use the surveillance camera

- drawing symbols and codes (?)

- attacking/harming others

- hunting random people or animal (which went fucking wrong cuz Melvin bit Jessica's arm and ripped her skin from her arm like a fucking animal which made Krupp proud as hell.)

Which of course GP!Krupp doesn't regret doing that, after all he ALWAYS wanted to raise Melvin like he wad his son so he took the whole "Fuck Adoption center" into a whole level and kept Melvin with him without letting hid parents know.

And of course. Sometimes he has to keep his eyes on him but hey! He knows what to do with him when he gets the chance to adopt him in the new way possible- even tho he might end up using him for his gruesome tasks or silly father-and-son moment stuff..👁👁

꒷︶໑꒦₊꒷꒥︶꒥꒷︶‧₊˚ଓ︶꒷꒷꒦꒥໑꒷੭︶︶꒥

✧ ┊• what the dog doi- I MEAN AHEM. GP!Krupp is pan *cough* *cough* or poly

✧ ┊• He makes random codes for fun just to show signs that he's messing with you. Yep he does troll everyone so don't expect him to do something unquestionable.

✧ ┊• "I AM MORE THAN A GOD...A FUCKING MOUNTAIN! HOOGA!"

Goofy ahh move

That's all pls don't cancel me this took me 4 days to make this garbage 🗿🗿 grrahhh-

#tw bl0od #captain underpants #the epic tales of captain underpants #captain underpants au #mr krupp #gp!krupp #cu tbgdotgp au #melvin sneedly #heidi hutchins

[npdvents]

It's been a while, but god I am fucked right now, TW // brief mention of self harm (and thats all i think??)

I've been sorting of tracking every time I have a "overraction" to small things this week.

I had 5 different "episodes" ((not sure what to call them, but 5 different moments of horrible feelings, all different, all caused by small but different things)) in like under 6 hours one day, and I feel so horrible over it

I hate it, I'm so emotional over nothing. I can't tell if this is a "puberty" thing, but I'm sure I used to be emotional even before puberty and it makes me scared. I always go from hating people to loving people in minutes and it's always over small things (e.g; a friend was talking to someone else instead of me in class so I felt betrayed, ignored, alone, I hated them for like 20 minutes and began to contemplate self harm, but then they talked to me again and I was fine) and I know my friends notice. I feel like I'm being a burden on them, being so emotional, unstable. They never know how I'm going to react

One day I was upset while walking into school and they.. well I approached them and immediately they noticed I was upset, so one of them started to like,, push the others away? Clearing a path for me to my FP.. and maybe it would've been a compliment to me if it want for the fact it made me feel like a rabid dog. They were avoiding me as if I was going to attack them at any moment. They even said "just let them go to [FP's name]" and stuff. Like i was something that needed to be controlled

I kind of get it but I dunno. I feel like I'm a lot to handle and I'm so scared. I don't understand why this is happening, I don't think it's normal but I'm scared to look into anything to do with it. I already know I have DID and NPD, I don't want to find out about any other disorder, because then I'll feel like I'm faking. Like I'm just looking for attention

I'm so paranoid all the time, so emotional, I can't help myself. I say "no more breakdowns today" and I immediately have a breakdown or whatever it's called. Even on the sleepover with my FP, I wanted to cry.

I know this may not be NPD related but I needed to get this off my chest

- 🫀🫁

It’s okay that this isn’t NPD related

It kinda sucks that it’s been like that lately, I hope things get better.

#npd vent #🫀🫁 anon #actually narcissistic #actually npd #cluster b safe #narcissistic personality disorder #npd safe #npd

[borderline-vents]

I hate feeling completely empty even when i talk to people and even if the emptiness goes away when im with others its only temporary and ill feel like that again once i go home. The problem has never been anybody else, the emptiness, the big gaping hole in my chest lies within me and nothing else has caused it. the problem is me, it always has been, it always will be. I wish to escape this body, i wish to escape this mind but i am trapped. i want to be free.

I bound by my emotions, my feelings. I beg and pray that one day I'll wake up and this will all just be a big scary nightmare but its not. its real, and i just cant bare to face it.

I cant really recognize my own face in the mirror. I knwo, logically, thats me, but everytime i look its like i see something different, like its just not me. I cant recognize myself. I dont know who i am, or who im supposed to be. when i people pleased at least i had some sense of what role to play, but now ive been more alone i dont know what to do. how to act. i dont know myself. i dont know me. i dont know if im real.

on a side note i think im finally letting go of my fp! hooray

-🫁

.

#borderline vent #🫁 #depersonalization

[radiostatic166]

🧠About Us🧠

This a blog with poems, writings, vents, and daily life things we go through. Our main topics will be about our life with HC-DID (Disossotive Identity Disorder). We are a Polyfragmented system and a RAMCOA survivor.

We are professionally diagnosed with Autism, HC-DID, Tourettes, and other disorders.

We use over It/It's pronouns

We are disabled, physically and mentally

CW for more talk about RAMCOA and our personal DNI and Fine to interact

RAMCOA is Ritual Abuse. Mind Control. and Organized Abuse.

🧠ORGANISED – involves a number of people doing something together in a pre-planned and/or structured way rather than acting alone

🫀RITUAL – rite, ceremony or (pseudo-] religious service which involves a series of actions performed in a fixed order and/or at certain times; something that is done in the same way whenever a particular situation occurs.

🫁ABUSE – cruel and violent treatment of a person or animal; use of rude, insulting or denigrating words and actions; use of something (e.g. object, animal, power, ritual, capacity to dissociate) in a deliberately harmful or terrorising way; for the purpose of gaining and maintaining control over the victim for the perpetrators’ gratification or protection.

~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~

Interact if....

DID/OSDD Systems

RAMCOA Survivors

Cult Survivors

Neurdivergent People

LGBTQIA+ community

Xeno/Neo users

Furries

Therians

Otherkin/Otherhearted

Autistic

DNI Interact if....

Homophobic/Transphobic

Anti-Neo/Xeno

Proshipper/ComShipper/etc.

Pro anything other than Traumagenic (such as endo, tupic, will, etc.)

Radqueer

Thinking not wanting to fully fuse is "Anti-Recovery"

Forcing Religious practices

IRL/Kins that use system terms

People who believe introjects are same as sourse

Uses disabilities as an excuse to do bad things (basically blames bad things they do on their disability)

P3dos, Zøøs, MAPs, etc

Racists

Fatphobic

#ramcoa #hc did #ramcoa system #ramcoa poem #ramcoa poems #did osdd #did system #actually autistic #blog #vent page

[yermes]

PAC: 🍁

School started for me and starbies just came out with their seasonal fall flavors so even though I am a victim of broke college student fevar I went to starbs bc whats $15 when yr already in a fuck ton of debt. So I went to starbs with my roomie to get some PSLs. But while we were there one of the baristas was just losing their absolute fucking mind at another barista who was just trying to help these young highschoolers not be late. Like???? Screaming at her not to touch anything and she can’t fucking jump the line my heart literally broke. If I had any money like fucking dollar bills I would have given them to her. Like so fucking awful. But honestly so many people are under appreciated. I literally spend my life taking care of people who claim that. “They only think of others, and they never put themselves first, or I am JUST SUCH A CARE TAKER.” But when push comes to shove they’re no where to be found. A READING FOR MY UNDER APPRECIATED MOTHER FUCKERS SO YOU KNOW HOW LOVED AND VALUED YOU AREEEE.

(I know most of you are mystics who wish to be the most esoteric babe in the mystic forest, who has to work a 9-5 so this is for youu)

Pick a meme

The cards

Nine of Wands (Reversed) 🧸

Yesod, Lord of Great Strength, Moon in Sagittarius, 10°–20°. Angels Yirthiel and Sahiah

You are putting something off in so you can help others. Something is being delayed. You are intentionally abstaining from something which in turn is causing you to spiral. Maybe your ass is working the rush shift everyday and your coworkers are assholes and you cannot bare to leave that anxious toxic ass mess. However, you owe it to yourself to find a better environment. People don’t leave because the security of which is offered but are you actually secure or are you comfortable in your mistreatment?

find people who will do better and will work with you and match your energy.

Futility 🪒

Moon 3. In Aquarius, Netzach in Air, seven of swords

The seventh suit. A notably unlucky suit. You have been backed into a corner and you need to get your way out. Now this isn’t a gun fight its a fight of wits. You need to use your cleverness to escape. Honestly, maybe a toxic friend or person you know led you down a dark path? Maybe you got love bombed so hard and led with the promise of love and compromise you fell so hard and breaking every bone on the way down. Be safe. Get out of there

Back rooms level RUN!

Fortitude (Reversed) 🫁

Daughter of the Flaming Sword, Teth, Serpent

Damn bitch you gave so much of yourself you became ill and have been weakened SEVERELY. You are also getting resentful which is hard. Like you said you were this strong ass bitch who could do anything. So you did everything and now you have egg on your face. Some athletes get trained so hard and so extreme they die. You’ve been giving so much mentally and emotionally you weakened yourself. You wouldn’t workout till death why would you give so much till failure?

Make room for yourself and forgive yourself.

The Star 💫

Jupiter in Aquarius, Chokmah to Tiphareth, Air

Its the hope that guides us all. You have such a deep well of love in that little heart of yours. The way its telling you to go is the right one. However, an off putting aspect is there may be part of the code thats got a bug, which makes your hopeful manifestations plagued by illusions. Live in the moment. Be confident of nature and your gut. Somethings may not be clear now but day by day and little by little you will find out more and more.

Take care of yourself and protect your peace

Extras:

Story/vent: once again athlete student life os difficult and I am shoving this reading in so that I can feel productive. Plus I love yo do it!

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#suitlifeofgerm #askgerm #pick a card #daily card #pick a picture #magic #shadow work #pac #tarotoftheday #germ reads #tarot #daily tarot #divination #cartomancy #beginner witch #witch #baby witch #tarotblr #tarot community #tarot commissions

[zombieunicornzeal]

RECOVER IF YOU CAN. I SUPPORT YOU. 💗💖💗

24yrs old. Minors DNI.

Mental health blog. Rants and random posts, frequent.

Mixed Personality Disorder. C-PTSD. Atypical Ana. And ADHD. 🍭🫐🍒🧊🍬🍭

Have a cat named Zany. He is the light in my life. I love him so much. 😺

Finally got back on track with becoming a doctor/surgeon. Thinking something in cardiology and Emergency Medicine. 🫀🫁💊🩻🩺🩼🧬🥼🥽

Wellcome to moots who are friendly and wanna chat in the comments (if at all). Always here if you need to vent. You are not alone. I am here for you. 👑🛍🎒🩴👑💝💗💝