#(also apparently jeb dances; good to know)

[agena87]

This is Daddy. He give the bestest hugs in the wold. I like a lot when he call me "Pwincess" and we dress the same. He say I am the more pwetty girl he know. More than aunty Via and aunty Tesa!

This is Vatti. He's my favouritest because he has a biiiiiiiig room with lots and lots o' paint in it and he let me make paint with him.

This is Papa. He's pwetty like a pwincess. He is sad because a very bad man was mean to him. But it's better now because the bad man is gwounded and he can't go play outside for a million years (like when I kicked aunty Tesa in the shin). He has a horsie! And baby goats and duckies and looooooots of other 'nimals.

This is my Jeb. He tell the bestest stories in the wold and he know to dance. Like me. But no ballet. He wrote a book just for me!

#ts4 #the sims 4 #ts4 render #render #oc: joy landgraab #sim: malcolm landgraab #sim: wolfgang munch #oc: alfie dubois #sim: jeb harris #too much cuteness #i love joy and i would die for her #and look at my baby al smiling! #it's been so long since we saw his smile #all thanks to this little ray of sunshine #(also apparently jeb dances; good to know) #(that's what i keep saying: characters tell you stuff about themselves or others when you less expect it and it's very cool) #extra: all that we are and will never be

[definitely-not-a-wasp]

Y’know what? I think there should have been MORE Fang Ari rivalry.

Because Ari knows that he and Max are siblings from the beginning. He never makes much of an effort to hide that. And he also knows, between himself and Max, Jeb will always pick Max. He doesn’t understand why, and he doesn’t understand that Jeb’s version of love is going to hurt no matter what, but he knows that Jeb loves Max more than him. That’s fine, because it has to be fine, because he’s not allowed to be angry at Jeb.

But the flip side of knowing Max is his sister is knowing that he’s her brother. And knowing that he’s not her only brother. And knowing that, between himself and her siblings— this specific sibling, more often than not, because Max and Fang have always depended on each other— she will pick her sibling every. Single. Time. Jeb picking Max is fine, he’s okay with that, but there’s no way in hell that Max should be allowed to pick this asshole over her flesh and blood brother.

(Max does not know that Ari is her brother. Ari is seven, so this fact is irrelevant.)

So yeah. He can be mad at his sister all he wants, and he is, he’s always angry, but he hates Fang. This person who got to spend a whole lifetime with his sister, who keeps turning her against her family, who she so obviously loves more than she loves her father or her real brother. Things would be a lot better for all of them if Fang didn’t exist, and if Fang is alone and in pain and terrified when they die? Well, that’s just a bonus.

And on Fang’s side... this seven-year-old with sharp teeth keeps trying to kill them. They try not to think about how they nearly fell out of the sky, or their hospital stay, or how their body still hurts and will never be the same, but it creeps up on them at night, like bile in their throat, and Ari doesn’t stop trying to kill them. Once is a coincidence, twice is a pattern, three times is a vendetta, and Fang is not going to lay down and die. Maybe killing Ari will finally let them sleep at night.

Max treats them like a monster when they try to hurt Ari. Truly hurt him, not just to incapacitate, because she knows Ari’s name and that means he’s more important than all of the other Erasers they put in the ground. Never mind that all of them were also kids, and that this specific kid keeps trying to kill Fang. And he can’t be mad at Max, because they need them and Max to be okay, they need to stick together, so that’s all the more reason to get their would-be-murderer out of the picture.

So they keep trying to kill each other, until Max (finally, finally, Ari knew it could happen) sides with Ari, and Fang leaves. Ari always knew that he could only be Max’s favorite if Fang was out of the picture, and Fang only now realizes that they’re playing for favorites, and they’re not a seven-year-old, they know that’s not how the world works, but—

But they know that they can’t both live under the same roof. Knows that Ari has a date on the back of his neck that marks him for death, and that Fang has been dancing around death for so long that it’s going to come to collect eventually, so it’s just a matter of who cracks first.

Fang leaves, because they were never good at dealing with conflict. If Max has decided that blood means more than they do, then that’s her choice.

Ari dies. Not too long after, Fang dies, and apparently neither are allowed to rest because the next time they see each other, they’re both breathing, even if neither would call each other alive. Neither would call themselves alive, but if they say that out loud then they have to admit that something’s wrong, so it’s a whole lot easier to look at the other and call them a ghost that needs to be put down.

They keep trying to kill each other. They somehow get more violent, more bloody, because neither really remember how to fear death anymore. They’re both on borrowed time, and there’s no point in being precious with it. And if one of them gets a good enough shot in and puts the other in the ground, then that means one of their bodies will be put right.

(It feels like some divine joke, or perhaps a punishment for a sin neither of them committed, that the one person who would understand what it feels like— that they’re moving and speaking but never actually came back, that something pulled them out of their broken bodies and shoved them back in all wrong— would be the same person who they hate.)

#yes I know Fax exists in canon but when have I EVER done a Max Ride analysis that took Fax into account? Never. #Fang (Maximum Ride) #ari batchelder #well I thought I was just going to cover Ari blaming Fang for Max's coldness towards him #And Fang's anger that their trauma was overlooked for the sake of this person who wasn't any more special than the other erasers #but yeah they're both corpses #they're corpses and they know that neither of them should be alive #but maybe if they kill the other then that can fix whatever's wrong with them #it's classic self recognition through the other (derogatory) #I really need to do that piece on Fang coming back to life and being fucked up about it #maximum ride on main #maximum ride

[gatheringbones]

Minnie Bruce Pratt, from Standing Up to the Literary Academy, from Happy Endings: Lesbian Writers Talk About Their Lives And Work, by Kate Brandt, the Naiad Press, 1993:

["Crime Against Nature went on to win great acclaim for Pratt, including a 1989 Lambda Award, an honor given by the Academy of American Poets for a poet's second book. But Pratt's award, prestigious though it is, might never have been noted outside poetry and academic circles had it not been for her acceptance speech. In her talk, Pratt noted that, as a lesbian, she could still be regarded as a criminal in her hometown of Washington, D.C. She also publicly credited the women's and gay and lesbian liberation movements for inspiring her life, her politics, and her work.

While Pratt's words delighted much of her audience (and, later, the larger gay and lesbian community as word of her brave and eloquent speech became widespread), they apparently shocked the two chancellors of the Academy of American Poets who sat on stage during the acceptance speeches. These men tried to cut off Pratt's speech before she had finished talking by interrupting her and by passing her a note. Pratt, however, continued speaking and reading from her award-winning poetry, as audience members vocally expressed their displeasure at the chancellors' rudeness.

When asked why she chose to give such an explicitly political speech at the award ceremony, Pratt explains, "I felt like, this award is taking me out of my usual context, my cultural/political context, and moving me— for the evening at least!— to the front of the stage in mainstream literary life. And I know how typical it is, in that situation, for the folks in the mainstream to see the person who is the 'minority' as an aberration, or as a dancing dog, or sort of an individual talent, right? Who somehow managed to overcome this disability of her minority status and actually write good poetry.”

"I was determined to bring my context with me. And for [the mainstream] to experience me as much as possible within my own culture. And the only way I could do that was to talk about where I had come from, so that they didn't delude themselves into thinking I was rising like Venus on the half-shell out of the ocean," she laughs. "You know? Miraculously appearing in front of them with this book that appeared out of nowhere!

"I felt it was really important and I knew that there were going to be people there who had made the culture that I had come from. [Publisher] Nancy Bereano was there, [writers] Barbara Smith, Jewelle Gomez, Judith McDaniel, Adrienne Rich, Marilyn Hacker, Joy Harjo, Elly Bulkin, [photographer] Joan E. Biren [JEB], my sons— you know, I asked a lot of people to come. Plus, there were other people who weren't literary people, but who were significant movement folks.

"And I just thought, am I going to get up in front of these people and act like I just stepped on the stage— again— out of nowhere? No! It wouldn't have been courteous, it wouldn't have been respectful, it wouldn't have been accurate. So, [the speech] upset folks, but— too bad."

Yet Pratt admits that she hadn't anticipated the hostile reaction of the academy chancellors, who, she says, "clearly had never read these poems. That was the irony of it! They were being hostile to me for the very thoughts and behavior that had enabled me to write the book that [the academy] was giving me an award for.

"They just weren't in touch with what the work was about. They really didn't care. They'd never heard of me; they just didn't care. And that was the thing that was most shocking to me, actually, about the whole evening. The homophobia was horrible. But what was shocking to me was the lack of passion about poetry. I'm used to folks taking it seriously. It is about life. It is about living. It is about the World Out There beyond the walls of the Guggenheim. And I was shocked at the insularity and the narrowness of their feelings about poetry."]

#minnie bruce pratt #lesbian literature #history stuff #wasteland radio

[graceeast]

Diary of high school meme

 this is a joke NSFW 18+

Part 1

My bro walks up to me and is like Benny how you feeling? I say I feel great, even though that’s not my name that’s not my name. Then we both hit the woah at the same exact time.

Then his VSCO girlfriend says an I opp sksksksk. Then she says WHO EVER JUST SENT YOU THIS JUST DUMPED YOUR ASS!

Then my guy turns to her and says respect the drip Karen!

Then I say no matter what, he will always come back to me.

Then my bro and I hug no homo though. Then we walk away to the song Rockstar by: Smashmouth, while doing the floss aggressively.

Then we go and play Minecraft together while drinking Bang and eating Doritos till one in the morning.

But then my bros mother Linda sent me home. ☹

 

Part 2

Linda is such a bitch “B-I-C-T-H in that order!” she always makes me leave A-arons house at one thirty in the morning.

Later that week A-aron and I took a seat in class. Then our teacher kept talking about China and how more then half our exports come from there.

Then A-aron went outside to vape. Karen then comes over and says give me your Juul. Then I say no Karen that Juul coast me sixty dollars. I had to get a senior to pay for it. I only work at Chilis so it took three paychecks to buy.

That night I worked and everyone at once said “Welcome to Chilis!” I just ignored them and kept walking as I usually do.

I go home then check my Reddit and Twitter fifty times to make sure I am still verified.

 

Part 3

The next day comes and I pick up A-aron up in my sick 2001 Toyota Camry it is beige of course only the sickest color.

We then get Karen and you won’t believe what she did… she yeeted my vape out the window! What the fork Karen! That took three paychecks from Chilis to buy.

Karen then says she hates that place and last time she ate there, they messed up he order. So she complained to the manager.

Damn Karen, I don’t need her anyway I will always have my bro A-aron. Our nights together watching Shrek 3 and Cars 2… Best movies ever! And of course, listening to our lord and savior Daft Punk on full volume.

 

Part 4

A bunch of kids are doing a fundraiser for Harambe and I am all for it of course “save the whales.”

And that’s why I only use Twizzlers to drink my RedBull. I don’t always drink RedBull but when I do I use a Twizzler as a straw then eat it.

Later I texted A-aron on my Nokia phone I sent him exactly 69 memes at exactly 4:20 as it is totally lit to do so every day. I said we should totally get back at Karen for throwing my Juul. He disagreed with me, then I told him to stop being such a girl. Then he says don’t assume my gender and I said look man I had no idea. Then he said you just did it again. I give up!

Then I smoked the devils cabbage and went to sleep #Blazeit

 

Part 5

A-aron and I made up he bought me a new Juul and said that our friendship is never ogre. So then I said #Fam! Then he and I did our secret handshake which consists a dab the woah and five different Fortnite dances.

Today I started dating Kim Vardashian she is a #skinnylegend who is also thicc with two c’s. I can’t wait till we can aggressively hug! But she is embarrassed of our love because I am a freshman and she is a senior.

I think today is the day I try out for the school play we are putting on the production Mulan 3. I want to play the part of Simba.

That night for dinner A-aron and I got Subway #I’m lovin’ it, it was mmm… mmm… mmm… finger licking good. Then we bought two cotton candy Juul cartridges from Kim and vaped all night.

 

 

Part 6

My Nokia phone stopped working so I went to the closest Radio Shack and got a brand-new Blackberry with a slide out key pad. It was very dope!

Since it was Saturday I went home and hardcore gamed on my Tamagotchi. It died ☹… it was sad until a new one came, and I bought all the snacks for it!

Kim is such a slut she broke up with me and told me she was only dating me because I have a job and gave her money to buy stuff from Gucci. Then she told me 20$ a week was not cutting it. Then I told her that’s all I make in a week. Now I also work for Walmart to make more money. But I guess it still was not enough for her. Damn Kim at least I have A-aron   

 

Part 7

A-aron and Kim got together I tried telling him that she was a bitch. But the #thirstisreal for him like he is the Sahara Desert when it comes to women. He really doesn’t care but I will be there if his heart gets broken.

Today is also my cousins 18th birthday and he is getting a tattoo. Its going to be a 95 the 9 is going to be a butterfly and the 5 is going to be a bee, and under it will say float like a butterfly sting like a bee Kachow -Lightning McQueen

He is actually going to get two tattoos the other one is going to be a glass of milk, swiss cheese, yogurt and under that one its going to say #legen-dairy #veganforlife. He is also getting Gingy from Shrek slippers

 

Part 8

Karen got hit with a tour bus!!! We rushed her to the hospital and to the psych ward cuz she cray cray.

Its been a month since A-aron and Kim got together I am very surprised. We all visited Karen today and then Kim said they were expecting. Then Karen said boom pregnant.

Apparently, the baby is going to be a reincarnation of Donald Trump and the baby is going to be huodge. But this is all according to Karen. But it seems legit, so I believe it.

I’ve been taking care of Karen’s dog Lo-Maine. He wares a Supreme hoodie and a Rolly on his wrist and even has Jorden’s and I must dress him every day #1stworldprobs.

 

Part 9

Karen got released today from the hospital and to celebrate she stole her moms ID and went to Iowa to celebrate. She then sent me a video of herself, “Hi my name I Kendall and I am here in Cedar Rapids once again asking for your support.” Your support for what I thought but then I saw it Kendall Landers-Linton 2020 president, Kendall must be her mom’s name.

Kim is now 5 months prego and still hanging on strong and everyone helps her with stupid shit like the teachers tell her she can have extensions on all her assignments. So unfair I get an erection every hour and I don’t get extensions on anything except my dick.

Who would vote for Karen I mean she looks like a 40-year-old woman, but she’s crazy to think that they won’t figure out that she’s just 20 and a senior in high school.

That day was crazy, so I went on my computer and watched my extra special anime movie if you know what I mean 😉. Jerked the turkey for 30 minutes and felt way more relaxed after my little session thank god for Japanese henti.

 

Part 10

Today we watched the Sanic the hedgehog movie it was the best movie ever in the movie Shrek and Sanic have a relationship. They end up getting married and having aggressive sex while listening to all of Smash mouths songs. Then they had hedgehog ogre hybrid babies they were so ugly that they were cute.

I later sat in class with A-aron he said that after watching that Sanic movie that he wasn’t sure if he was ready to be a father. Because Shrek and Sanic made for a really good couple and were good at raising their kids. I told him not to worry and that if he watched all the Shrek movies and played all the Sanic games that he had already learned all he needs to about fatherhood. He felt relieved after I said all that, he said it was good that he did all the necessary research we then dabbed and then the bell rang.

Kim went into labor at lunch it was really disgusting, but interesting because all these people came, and our school nurse Joe Biden delivered the baby. Kim decided to name her son Boe Jiden after Joe Biden’s name, the school nurse was in tears until he saw another baby coming out. It’s a girl!!!! Kim named that kid Karen Jr. after her best friend. It was amazing then I told A-aron that his sperm must be made of steel since he had two kids, he then punched me in the arm no homo though.   

Part 11

All of the sudden another baby just shoulder dropped itself out of Kim. It was a boy!!! "I will name this one Jim Cenass" (all of the sudden from the corner you here horribly played kazoo it plays the John Cena fan fair) do do do do... it's that new transfer student Korona Tortilla Vanbargen Sale Pool Noodle the 4th KTVSPN4 for short. Jim Cenass starts waving his hand in front of his face as of to say you cant see me then he just goes ham on our school nurse Joe Biden. The principal Jeb Bush had to break up the fight. Then Jim started fighting Boe and Karen jr. It was something else.

Our new transfer student KTVSPN4 is very strange she kinda keeps to herself but at least she made friends with Kim and Karen. She's from China and is such a cry baby she keeps complaining that her sister died of this weird disease. But other then that been helping A-Aron with his three babies Jim is a handful and we have to keep him away from the others but it's kinda hard now because they have already started calling and Jim can walk.

Part 12

Today I was just sitting in Chillery Hiltons history class when all of the sudden I heard loud noises coming from above me. Then Boe and Joe just shoulder dropped onto the teacher it was very strange. Thankfully Chillery is going to be ok!

Later that day Kim's babies are getting baptized by our local priest Dr. Phil. Jim was not having it and started going ham on Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil then say y'all need Jebus in your life. Phil then #getsrektmydude. And Bylieye Eyelash starts playing her song I'm the Evil Man which was perfect for the occasion.

We all had an assembly today our principal Jeb said it was to recognize great teachers in our school. "Best dance teacher Shreckira" Shreckira goes up and can not hold herself together it was major aco taco.

"Lane Jinch for best gym teacher" Lane goes up and says "I know I'm the best." "Sernie Banders best public speaking teacher" Sernie goes up and gives a 50 page long speech how he doesn't deserve this. "Steve Harvey for best health teacher and guidance counselor" Steve then goes up and starts talking about how important college is and the birds and the bees. And last but not least "Beyonce for best music teacher" Beyonce comes up and starts singing my Heart will go on by Celine Dion. Jeb then says please clap!

Part 13

Today Karen got Lo majne trained to be a service dog naturally every one at school wanted to pet lo majne. Karen was like "I'm working bitch" so we all backed off because Karen is crazy!

Today I went to the super market and you know your boy broke yo. So I tried to take some stuff you know and you will never believe what they did. They tried to arrest my ass I dont deserve this I'm broke and now they want me to go to court. Like type 2 diabetes ain't no body got time for that. My lawyer says they will fight for me they dont have a gender and they call themselves foxy Roxy. Hopefully foxy Roxy has my back and we win.

Hey I'm foxy Roxy I usually work at a drag strip club and men eat me up. Just when you thought your husband was straight oh no honey he ain't. I make about 10million pennies or should I say 10 million penis's every show and I live in a trailer with my sweet heart wide boy and I will win this

#funny #short story #fiction

[thewildwaffle]

Abduction - Chapter 28

Thanks for the patience for this chapter. The next one won’t be as long to post (seeing as it’s already well-underway because it was going to be part of this chapter before it turned into a huge monster of a chapter) Thank you to everyone reading and especially those that have given feedback or encouragement! This story is almost done and it would have never gotten this far without you!

Chapter 1    Previous Chapter      Next Chapter

*******

How does life with humans get so crazy?

That was a question that was on repeat in Thurrin’s head as she ran.

One partec you’re living your life, working your dream job, minding your own business (meaning, of course for Thurrin, sticking her nose into everyone else’s business), and then the next partec, you’re running for your life on a hostile alien ship while looking for more aliens you thought had died.

Can life get crazier?

“I bet it could,” Vern panted next to her as they rounded yet another corner. “You just got to roll with it though. Adaptation is the key to survival.”

Thurrin didn’t realize she’d said anything out loud and her fur heated slightly. “Adaptation, huh? Humanity’s superpower?”

A patrol of guards appeared in front of them. Barely slowing her pace, Kylee held out one arm as he ran into the guards, clotheslining them (as Thurrin would later learn that move was called), grabbed the third guard with her other arm as she turned, picking up the unbalanced and surprised guard before tossing them into the other guards on the floor.

Vern grinned at Thurrin. “Yeah well, that’s what they say.” He looked down at the tracker device in his hands that Booka Vern had given them. “Nice moves. By the way Kylee, I think your arm’s bleeding.”

“Is it?” Kylee checked herself over. It didn’t take long to see what Vern had pointed out. There was a rip in the fabric over her upper arm. Thurrin gasped inwardly at the mess. Blood had already started drying on the frayed ends of the fabric and on her skin. How had she not noticed such a wound?!

“Must have happened back in the docking bay.” She looked around the corners of the hall’s intersection for more approaching guards. “Ooh. I can feel it now that I know it’s there. Dang, I think I got a few more around my shoulder.”

“Are you going to be okay?” Thurrin’s whiskers twitched anxiously. Kylee had led the charge from the ship. She felt bad that she had also taken the brunt of the damage.

Vern helped inspect the wounds. He pulled out a bandage from the small first aid kit they’d brought along and wrapped it tightly over the worst of the cuts. “I’m surprised you just noticed them now. Guess you have adrenaline to thank for that, but it might suck later.” Finishing up, he stepped back and over the fallen guards. Looking down at them, he smiled, “You’ve got some moves though.  Where’d you learn how to fight like that?”

 “I grew up with three older brothers.” She nodded to the tracker. “See anything yet?”

Vern looked down and studied the screen for a moment. “We’re definitely getting closer, but no hard data on screen yet. I think we’re at least on the right level now though.” He started toward the intersection and gave one last look at the fallen guards. “Your brothers teach you to fight dirty?”

Thurrin and Kylee followed behind him. “What? Oh no, sorry, neither. I have brothers, but they were picked on big-time while we were growing up. So I beat up their bullies.” 

Vern chuckled. Only a few steps down the corridor, the machine in his hands started beeping. All three of them crowded around the device to see. Two dots sat in the middle of the screen. Two humans - Kylee and Vern. On the very edge of the screen were two more dots.

“Well,” Vern hustled down the hall, “Unless the Burnti have more humans aboard, I think we just found Mike and Wenona.” 

And Jeb too, hopefully, Thurrin thought. She would have said it aloud, but it was all she could do now to keep up with Kylee and Vern. She ran on all fours behind them. She had nearly outrun them before, but now was struggling to keep up. Humans weren’t especially fast, but what they lacked in speed, they made up for in endurance.

She kept up as best as she could, the corners were especially tricky- the humans didn’t have to slow down to take the turns, they just kind of leaned in as they went. Their balance was pretty impressive for only having two legs and no tail. Thurrin, trying to keep up with them had to bank the turns since these halls had no grippy pads on the floors. Sure, the shiny floors look nice, but they’re too slippery!

They passed a few aliens in the halls, not guards, who quacked, chirruped, or squealed in surprise as they rushed by.

“How close are we to them?” Kylee yelled.

“Not far,” Vern called back. “They’re in some room at the end of a hall. It’s just a little bit-!”

A loud tone interrupted and nearly made all three of them stumble. A voice that sent shivers down Thurrin’s back followed, “This is Fleet Commander Rozar. Humans have escaped. Armed and dangerous. Kill on sight.”

All three of them stopped and gaped at the nearest speaker. Thurrin's fur darkened to a cold pale red.

"What do we do now?" Vern whispered.

Kylee was the first to recover. She shook her head and took a deep breath. "This changes nothing. We knew this would be dangerous." She nodded to the tracker in Vern's hands. "How close are we?"

Vern looked down and studied the screen. "Close. Just a few corridors down."

As they started on their way again, a strange noise started echoing from ahead of them. It was short, fast, and seemed to shake the air around them. The two humans looked at each other.

“Is that…?” Kylee held her breath to listen.

Vern looked back to Thurrin then forward, listening as well. “I… I don’t know.” He picked up the pace. “We got to hurry, come on!”

Thurrin kept her ears pointed straight ahead as they ran, trying to figure out what the sound was coming from. Whatever it was, it seemed to have spooked the humans. Spooked humans are a good cause for concern. Was it maybe some horrible creature the Burnti had released to kill Mike and Wenona? As they got closer, it was definitely starting to sound like an animal of the dangerous sort. 

Thurrin’s muscles burned, but she tore ahead with a new burst of speed. Her friends were in danger! She’d claw the frewan out of whatever it was that trying to harm them! She could hear hurried steps coming from around the next corner. She led Kylee and Vern around the turn and-

THUD!

The impact was like hitting a padded brick wall. The animal noise that had been worrying her so much morphed into a surprised, high-pitch yelp. Thurrin lost her footing and tumbled paws over head a few tail-lengths before coming to a stop. She swore she could see little fireballs dancing around her vision.

“What the-?”

“What just happened?”

The loud animal bark noise was back.

“...THURRIN?”

That last voice was deep and familiar. She blinked a few times to clear her head. She looked up and nearly cried. “Jebannuck!” She tried to smile as she panted. She managed to get her paws underneath her body as one of his old lines to her came to mind, “well, where are you sneaking off to?”

Thurrin had hoped to get some sort of laugh out of Jeb, but at that moment, her vision was filled with a large, dark, sniffing nose.

“Ack!” She batted at the offending muzzle in surprise and leapt to her feet. Unfortunately, the nose followed her.

“Carson, down, come on.” The nose was pulled back and Thurrin could see it belonged to a brown, four-legged monster. It was huge! Pulling the creature away though was Mike. MIKE! Already, her fur was slowly starting to lay flat again.

“A dog?” Vern stepped next to Mike and stroked the creature on the head. Thurrin recognized the action, as Wenona had done that to her absent-mindedly when they first met. She knew it felt nice.

“Where the heck did you get a dog?” Vern continued as he scratched the creature’s long floppy ears. Thurrin tried her best to keep her own ears from going back. She wasn’t jealous. Or so she told herself.

“Long story. Burnti were trying to study Earth-life and dog-napped him. And us, indirectly I guess.” Mike held out his hand to Vern who grabbed his hand and shook it.

‘So that’s what human greetings are supposed to be like,’ Thurrin thought to herself.

Her attention turned back to the dog. Whatever it was, it was apparently on good terms with the humans. That was enough for her, right? She shuffled forward and reached out with a paw to pat the creature’s muzzle gently. The dog sniffed at her paw and gave it a lick. Her ears flickered and she felt her fur heat up just a bit. This thing wasn’t a sentient creature, was it? Well, even if it was, how would it know how forward of a gesture that was in Booka culture?

Mike smiled. “You got my Morse-code message then?”

Kylee smiled and let out a short burst of air from her nose, “Yeah, eventually. It took a while to get someone who could decipher what you were doing. You couldn’t have gone with a simple SOS?”

Wenona chuckled quietly. Mike frowned, “Hey, you didn’t think of that either you know.”

“No, you’re fine Mike,” Vern made a waving motion with a hand toward Kylee and Wenona. “It was good information and we got a bit more of an idea of what we were coming into to get you.” He turned back down the hall they had come from. “I’m sure you heard the announcement just a bit ago?”

“We were in the same room when it was made,” a new voice said gruffly. Thurrin looked and was surprised to see a Montauk of all creatures. Her fur poofed up and darkened a bit again. What, by all that is bright and shining was a Montauk doing here? With her humans?! It was then that she noticed Wenona. Something must have happened, she had to be hurt. There was no other way she’d let anyone carry her like that for any other reason.

“Wenona,” Thurrin bound to her and Jeb, “Are you alright?” She left ‘what did that monster do to you’ unsaid, but she shot a dirty look to the Montauk.

“I’m fine,” Wenona forced a smile for her friend. It was at that moment that Jebannuck had to readjust his hold and jostled her a bit. She winced.

“Sorry,” Jeb frowned.

The Montauk pushed past to follow where Vern was inching backwards down the hall. “None of us are going to be fine if we stay around here much longer.”

Thurrin scowled as she passed. When she turned to follow, she got a face full of “dog” who had come up to sniff curiously at her again. Instinctively, her fur flared in surprise, wisps of faux flames leaping from her tail. Both she and the dog jumped back from each other and studied each other for a moment. It was only a moment though. As much as she hated to admit it, the Montauk was right, they couldn’t stick around. It was “kill on sight” for the humans, and she was sure that extended to the rest of them as well.

“Can you get us back to your ship,” Mike asked as he pulled the dog back to his side and started down the hall. Jebbanuck followed immediately behind. Thurrin took the rear, making sure no one snuck up from behind on the group as they went.

“Vern’s got a tracker,” Kylee answered, “It’s set to human DNA, that’s how we found you.”

“So there are more humans on your ship?”

“No,” Kylee handed a spare blaster to Mike as they jogged down the hall, “we weren’t sure what state we’d find you in or what state we’d be in after trying to get you out, so Demfar came prepared. He’s got a bag of O- blood on board just in case. It’s enough for the tracker to pick up on.”

“Why would you need a bag of blood?” The Montauk looked back at them, confused and a bit perturbed.

“Emergency transfusion,” Kylee was starting to pant now. They hadn’t had much time to catch their breath before starting to run for their lives again. “Knock on wood that no one gets hurt badly enough to need it.”

The Montauk clicked her mandibles as she ran. Even from the back, Thurrin could hear her mutter, “Blood transfusions? How does that-? I don’t- Humans are so flarging weird.”

It wasn’t long before they ran into others in the corridors. The first few weren’t guards, just a few gangly bipeds carrying large bags. They threw themselves out of the way as the group barreled past, shock, and fear plastered on their faces as they did their best to become one with the walls. After they passed, Thurrin looked back to see them stumble and turn around to start running down the hall in the opposite direction.

The first set of guards they came across actually met up with them at a “T” intersection. They nearly ran into the middle of the fugitive pack. Unfortunately for the guards, that’s where the dog was. Before they could fire off an accurate shot at anyone, Mike had let go of the collar around its neck and it tore at them with a ferocious growl. In almost no time, they were on the ground, out cold from either the attack itself or just from fear, Thurrin wasn’t sure. She felt stunned as they ran.

Humans could be terrifying. At first glance, you wouldn’t think so. At first glance, they’re actually sort of cute by most species’ standards. Then you get to know them and what they’re capable of. Some of it doesn’t seem real, but then you see them in action and it becomes very real. And then you learn more about their home and where they come from and it starts making sense. They can take something as scary as a huge dog and not only be unafraid of it, but bond with it, protect it, be protected by it. Humans were strong, but humans with bonds and alliances were even stronger.

“By blue stars!” a voice from ahead pulled her out of her thoughts. She looked up, it was the Montauk. The corridor had widened out along this stretch, which was a good sign that they were on the right track back to the ship. The Montauk - Simmo or something wasn’t it?- was staring at a messy scene on the other side of the corridor. Thurrin noticed the feathers first. They were everywhere, and there was something about them that seemed familiar…

“Don’t touch the feathers,” Jebbanuck pushed through the paused group, urging them forward. “It’s a greable death bird. It was in the same cell block that I was in earlier. And so was that… thing.”

Thurrin followed tentatively, careful to avoid contact with the dangerous strewn feathers. Then she saw the “thing” Jeb was referring to. It was black and white and covered with yellowish blood that belonged to the death bird that was almost two times bigger than it. Its black tail was poofed and raised high behind it, while in the front, its teeth in its triangular mouth were biting and snapping at the greable. Thurrin was VERY thankful for the wide hall here, but even then, the two creatures were moving and thrashing about so much, she was worried about someone getting caught up in it before they could pass by.

A few more corridors connected along the hall, but their openings were right along where the two deadly creatures were. Thurrin heard before she saw, Burnti guards running down one hall towards them, opening fire as they came up. Mike grabbed Simmo and pulled her behind him. He reached out for Thurrin, but as he did, one of the shots glanced him in the back and sent him crumpling to the floor.

“Mike!” Both Thurrin and Simmo screamed. Thurrin felt her heart and fur freeze. She had known, hadn’t she?- that this would be dangerous? That they might not make it out alive? But knowing before didn’t stop how she felt now. She felt she had no control over her body as she bounded towards Mike. It hadn’t been a direct hit. He had to be okay, he just had to be!

The blaster shots stopped, but Thurrin barely noticed. She checked for breathing and rested a paw on Mike’s neck. Like with many species, it was a vulnerable spot and she could feel a pulse. Praise the Star Weaver! She could feel a pulse!

She jumped a bit when Simmo squatted down next to her. Her shoulders felt tense, but she watched warily as the Montauk checked him over. She did her best to stay calm until Simmo started smacking him with the broad side of her claws!

“Hey!” Thurrin protested claws retracted to defend her friend.

“Wake up Mike, come on, wake up,” Simmo glanced up at Thurrin with a strange expression. Was that worry on her face? Concern? Thurrin wasn’t really sure. She’d never seen a Montauk with an expression like that before.

A groan from Mike made them both look down at him. Against all odds, he was already waking up! Did he realize how close he came to being dead?!

“Can you pick him up?” Thurrin asked. “We need to get out of here.” She looked to where the guards had been shooting. They’d retreated and it soon became clear what had happened. It had taken them a moment to notice the greable death bird and the strange black and white creature, but once they did, they had backed back into the corridor around the corner, peeking out to try to make a better assessment of the situation.

“I can help,” Kylee was at their side and together they were able to get Mike vertical again. He was starting to come around, at least enough to take a bit of his own weight. Kylee had his arm draped around her shoulder and had Simmo get his other side.

Thurrin looked dubiously at Kylee’s wounded arm. “Are you sure you can do this? You’re hurt too.”

Kylee didn’t respond, but Thurrin noticed her wincing and clenching her jaw tightly.

“He saved my life again,” Simmo was starting to breathe heavily as they began hurrying toward the exit. Thurrin let them pass as she took the rear of the group. “Again?” she wondered at Simmo's words. What had happened since Mike and Wenona had been gone. Apparently a lot.

She took one last look behind her as they left the room to make sure they weren’t being followed. She saw more guards enter the other side of the hall, only to be stopped in their tracks when they finally noticed the fighting creatures blocking their way. 

Most guards backed away quickly, panic coloring every part of their faces as they recognized the greable, and that it was fighting something that could actually hold its own against it. The large greable was screeching in pain, a rare sound that is known to rupture sensitive ears of at least two different species in the Galactic Confederation. Its opponent was making a fur-chilling screaming noise as it hacked and bit and sliced its way through the greable.

 It was winning. It was… it was killing a death bird!

“What in gadring is that thing?!” Thurrin yelled as she caught up with the rest of the group.

The humans, Mike included, almost in unison answered, “Honey badger.”

Vern led the way back through a hall off to the left. Still a bit shocked, Thurrin, Jeb, and Simmo paused a moment, gaping at the bloody battle now behind them. Wenona, still in Jeb’s arms tapped him on the chest, snapping him out of it. “Let’s go,” he followed the humans who were now sprinting down what they had dubbed “the home stretch” earlier. “That thing should slow down any guards coming our way from behind.”

“I take it you and Wenona weren’t the only ones abducted from Earth, huh?” Vern looked back at the group as everyone caught up.

Mike nodded. “We’re the only humans though. Rozar wanted to use us to destabilize Earth’s alliance with the GC.” “Well, he managed that at least,” Kylee muttered angrily.

“Wait, what?” Mike blinked in surprise. Or pain? Thurrin wasn’t sure.

“Shh…” Vern stopped and turned back to everyone. Thurrin tilted her ears forward. The docking bay they’d left the ship in was just around the corner and she could hear the noises of the guards that were blocking them from their getaway.

“What do you mean he succeeded?” Mike whispered angrily. Both Vern and Simmo shot him a look to keep it down.

“That’s why he wants us dead,” Wenona whispered. “He wants an alliance with Earth, but if the truth gets out about what he did to get it…”

Kylee nodded, “We need to make sure that that truth gets out. Getting you two out of here will be proof. The United-Earth Space Embassy is still allied with the GC, but we can make sure no rogue governments will sympathize with the Burnti after what they’ve done, after what Rozar just ordered.”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed,” Simmo cut in, “But we still have a docking bay full of guards between us and the ship.

"Right," Jeb frowned at the corner that was currently hiding them from the said bay of guards. "Wenona, will you be alright if I put you down for a moment." She nodded and he carefully set her down. Thurrin noticed she leaned heavily against the wall.

Jeb strode to the corner to assess the docking bay. "I'm assuming the ship they've surrounded is the one we're needing to board?"

Kylee nodded. "That's the one. Demfar is still aboard. As soon as we're clear he'll deactivate Vern's taser Shields and unlock the ship for us."

"Taser Shields?" Jeb turned back to Vern, looking a bit impressed. "That was experimental technology. It's been released? You know how to install and operate it?"

"Not me," Human Vern shook his head. "Booka Vern. He's from our crew. He led the development team that built it and he gave us his prototype before we left. And this tracker," he lifted the machine in his hands slightly. "As well as the signal dampener on the ship and the security scrambler we planted on a console on the bay when we left.”

Jeb’s brow quirked and he looked like he might ask more, but froze as the shouts and footsteps of approaching guards started coming from behind the group.

“Frewan,” Jeb muttered. “They found a detour.” He stepped toward Wenona to pick her up again when the first of the guards rounded the corner.

It was fast - a white, short-furred quadruped with massive shoulders. It seemed to have the same problem as Thurrin had had earlier with taking corners and had banked the corner to make it at full-speed. It must not have been expecting to catch up with them so quickly though. Thurrin caught a split tick of surprise on its face before it barreled straight into Simmo and Carson. The dog let out a surprised and angry yelp as they tumbled. There was a loud THUNK as bodies hit the wall. The white alien was up on its feet almost instantly. It looked quickly around at the group and growled. Carson responded with an even more terrifying growl. The guard looked down at the dog baring his fangs, and before they could do anything else about it, Vern lunged and punched them square in their jaw. They went down like a sack of pebbles.

Vern swore and dropped the tracker. His now-free hand clutched the one he had just punched with. “That was such a bad idea. I think something’s broken.”

Thurrin’s ears flickered at more sounds coming from the hall. “We got more incoming!” She leaped over to human Vern and picked up the tracker. It looked like it was in bad shape from being dropped, but hopefully, it would still do its job to alert Demfar that they were here so he could let them in. She turned and ran to the docking bay. Everyone was quick to follow.

The guards likely hadn’t been waiting for them to return. They’d been more concerned with getting their work area back in order and getting into the captured ship.

Thurrin rushed through the legs of the first few guards. By the time their surprise settled and they registered her presence, the rest of her group were on them. Jeb was first. He twisted his shoulder down and into the guards without hurting Wenona in his arms. He barreled through and knocked several guards to the ground. Those left still standing had to deal with Carson and the others as they charged in.

Thurrin, without slowing a moment, took cover under a loaded workbench. No one noticed her in all the commotion. She smacked the device in her paws. It didn’t respond. Frewan. Booka Vern was going to irate that this thing was broken. Thurrin looked up and leaned forward to look at their ship. What was much more important right now though, was the fact that the tracker couldn’t open the doors for them. Demfar would have to do that manually. She reactivated her comm device and waited for the sound of the connection click.

“Demfar, can you hear me? We need you to drop the taser shields and open the doors to the shuttle NOW!”

“Thurrin?” Demfar’s voice sounded quiet and confused. “I thought we were still in radio silence. Are you and the others okay?”

“Yes, but not for long. The tracker’s down and we can’t open the doors on our end, we need you to do it manually!”

“I’ve got it, taser shields are down. The security on the doors will take just a moment.”

If he said anything else, Thurrin didn’t hear it. At that moment, the entire workbench she was under crashed to its side, toppling it and everything on it to the floor and onto Thurrin. A rocky-skinned guard lay on its back on top of the mess. 

Thurrin worked her way out of the rubble to see Kylee fight off another guard with her good arm. She threw punches and dodged hits and blasts, covering for Simmo and Mike who were limping quickly behind her. Mike didn’t look great, but Thurrin watched amazed as he pushed through or ignored the pain to swing and push aside any guards that slipped past Kylee and Simmo. In fact, he was attacking with such a ferocity that Simmo had to let go of him and step back.

That couldn’t be good. How did he get that much energy? He was hurt! What was he thinking? He shouldn't be standing let alone fighting!

Then it hit her. He wasn’t thinking. Or maybe, he was, but he was thinking about the last time he’d been injured and fighting for his life on an alien ship. He’s panicking. He’s dangerous, she noted as he wrestled with a bulky gray guard, but in this state, he’s just as much a danger to himself.

Thurrin winced as she took off her pack. She could feel sore muscles and contusions forming already, but she shoved the useless tracker into the bag and returned it to her back. With all her paws now free, she leaped into the fray to defend her friend.

She wasn’t sure where everyone else was in all this mess, but she knew Mike needed her help now. He couldn’t do this alone.

Previous Chapter        Next Chapter

#abduction #humans are weird #aliens #space #humans are space orcs #ptsd #original writing #scifi

[imadeletingmysocials]

My scores for E3, because apparently now i’m a dumb 4channer who thinks this /v/ meme shit matters, like it’s not gonna affect sales or anything it’s pointless as all hell [this is lenghy, but hear me out ok]

EA: 

4/10 - people will probably play the games regardless of how shitty this presentation was but... It felt pretty insulting. 

Battlefield V is probably gonna make a lot of money regardless cuz people like war games and it seems pretty well done, the more footage they have shown seemed better than their weird advertizement that made world war 2 seem very wacky, which honestly regardless if you’re a sexist neckbeard or not, seemed like a poor advertizement move. 

TinyBuild:

No one watched this lol and it was just 1 GAME and a fun cute musical that made people who aren’t strong enough to musicals die, 6/10 because it made nerds die and their song is catchy, i dont really care about their 1 game.

Microsoft:

 9/10 - I'm giving this much of a high score because I would play practically almost all of these games showcased (they’ll probably be available on PC which I’m biased for cuz I have a gaming PC), no kidding, I pretty much liked everything I saw and it was fairly straight to the point. Many gamers don’t appreciate the finer details of each game and think they’re generic but that’s just fanboys who haven’t played a single game outside of their favorites. 

Also my cousin uses those Xbox One netflix rip offs that gives you games so i’m happy for him. The presentation had a lot of diamonds in the rough games that will I will probably appreciate more over time (they might even become cult classics like Metro or Dying Light) than any of other games at other e3s. As for the stuff I won’t be playing: It’s mostly harmless so eh.

There was an abundance of trailers! It was like one after the other, pure goodness, it seems as if they left out all of the Sports games to EA to present and the only thing they showed that might not be anyone’s cup of tea was “Forza”, but honestly? I appreciate it, it seems like a good racing game even if I’m not one to buy racing games.... But the more you think about the number of good games presented, the less you’ll think about that, I mean they showed DEVIL MAY CRY 5!!! 

...The Funko Pop game made me scream though.

Bethesda: 

8.5/10  I cannot deny that these are games I will want to play regardless if they’re good or not. Sad to see nerds not enjoy the opportunity to meet ANDREW W.K. but I’m glad all of the divisions they own are making sequels to stuff I already like, so pretty much Bethesda played it safe.

Devolver Digital:

 8/10 It’s like that one b-movie film your college students made and you had a laugh with creating.

Square Enix: 

5/10 seriously, 30 minues of just trailers? Most of which we saw?? I guess it could be worse but who uses E3 screentime for mostly MMORPG deals! The new stuff was too vague to be excited about too.

Ubisoft: 

7/10 - I liked it when they made funny quirky things and their games are probably gonna be okay like usual, Ubisoft has dedicated fans that like their collectathon games they release every year, and it’s usually that one game you play when you’re bored and got nothing else, it’s okay. 

Gamers hate fun and dancing and all that stuff but I kind of find stuff like that exciting, while nerds who never went outside and who are sensitive as all hell to any representation of fun find it “cringey”. A panda dabbed, and that settles it, Ubisoft was the only E3 Brave enough to dab this year. 

PC Game Conference (it was fairly long):

I know none of you watch this one cuz y’all fake as hell but listen... Fuck you LOL, these are the type of games people actually play over 400 hours and really get people’s money. Like these are games built to last that might be on the best-selling Steam front page for MONTHS, like how Frostpunk was comfirmed last year during this conference, PC Gaming has been known for sleeper hits that nobody knows about (because the attention goes to cinematic experiences on consoles most of the time) but suddently everyone’s playing it. 

PC gaming has always been an alternative lifestyle and seeing as many people didn’t watch this one, that just proves the point that it still relatively alternative. Maybe it’s because everyone sounds dumb as fuck when saying “PC GAMER MASTER RACE” and acting like an elitist. 

The PC Gaming conference is always more of a talk show than a regular E3 which is why I respect it every year, fuck the hyperactive gamers that just wanna see flashy trailers, this one’s more SOPHISTICATED!! It feels a lot more human and less artificial. Either way, lot’s of what you might’ve expected: Simulators and Survival games you’ll probably spend 3 years playing until they make a better minecraft clone. 

Gamers like to act as if they’re tired of Battle Royale (already? It’s a new fad it still is here to stay for a little more) but the numbers and success of it doesn’t lie that it isn’t a fad that proves itself to be highly tempting to try out for developers. Go cry to valve that they didn’t release Half-Life 3 cuz you haven’t played any other FPS game without even researching that Valve pretty much fired all of it’s developers and you’re just being annoying.

I feel as if I need to comment what I saw at this e3 cuz nobody watched, they made a mod I liked from skyrim into a fully-ass game, they’re rebooting Star Control which not a single gamer today knows of, the HP Lovecraft open world detective game also seems very good. YAKUZA IS COMING TO PC!!!!!!!!! Killing Floor 2 stuff, Road Redemption stuff, SHARK RPG, cute indie games, Jeff Goldblum was there, Wall-E with a gun in VR which seems to have promissing good vr design by Insomiac games (yes the spyro people), 2 games about Taxi driving... Like sure I think it’s a good format for story telling but.

A cell-shaded art game, star citizen is still being made, and it’s gone to the point nobody really wants it anymore even if it’s... Still being made you know? So most guys are wrong that it was gonna be canceled. After that was the technical graphic card stuff which gamers don’t have enough capability to understand, stuff like 9k laptops that SELL a lot mind you. Rich people love that technical stuff. 

A space defense sim game, Don’t Starve Sequel, Just Cause 4 detailed explanation of the engine, Overkill’s The Walking Dead gameplay which has been in development hell for years now now has a release date, I discovered Clementine’s voice actor is white... Go figure, a literal pixelated roguelike (not what you think it is, it’s Noita), 

Theme Hospital REBOOT!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And the doctors were cute. Probably one of the funniest games presented... Followed by REALM ROYALE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That harvest moon clone with a cute art style is still being made: Ooblets, no release date sadly. Anno is still going, cyanide and happiness still exists? and they’re making a battle royale? lol okay. How was Hitman 2 not announced during Square Enix?? Anyways it’s here at the end, the trailer was amazing and it’s coming out this year. 

I don’t have that much strong feelings because it’s just a normal conference and not a special one you know? But I’ll give it a 8/10 or 7/10 im not sure cuz I seem to like most games and I found Frankie cute.

Sony: 

Yo usually Sony makes like a huuuuuuuge thing about their conferences (like this year they didn’t even showcase indie games) but this year they started from a church for the sake of immersion?? It reminded me a little of their first E3s during the 90s, and it almost felt like a indie gathering for musicians, I swear to god, Sony is borderline experimental trying to balance out their E3 across stages. Jeb played the banjo and people just ACCEPTED it... AND THEN someone played some JAPANESE FLUTE? aRT. It might come off as a bit arrogant for some tho.

Nerds hated it and thought it was bizzare, which is why it means it’s good. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH BITCHES. Anyways could have been a little more fast-paced... But then again when it was fast-paced it was just like: Huh? What was that? I’m a big Resident Evil Fangirl, RE2 was my childhood but ignoring that for a sec: finally, Death Stranding gameplay, remins me of shadow of the colossus but post-apocalpytic, survival horrorish and abstract sci-fi.

 Kind of feels more Metal Gear than MGSV did already Cuz Norman Reedus sounds like snake a lot more than the 24 hours guy, and because from what I’ve seen in the footage, someone acts like Otacon to “Sam”. I think most now can figure out the plotpoints of this game with what has been established. I might be a bit sad at the fact that this will be a PS4 exclusive just like Metal Gear Solid 4, which I still haven’t played fully because it’s PS3 exclusive and I only have a gaming PC. 

Also this E3 was surprisingly entirely SINGLE PLAYER, I sorta don’t believe in the “single player doesn’t exist” myth honestly, especially now. I’m not sure if that makes Sony’s E3 better or worse, maybe it needed more variation, like I’ve commented, usually they have an indie showcase which this year did not. There were few games shown but for what it was worth, it’s still interesting... But yeah just 5 games? No Spyro? (easy picking), nothing extra? I can understand why many people felt this E3 was upsetting.

8/10.

Nintendo

Here it is, the most overhyped developer of all of E3, the source of “Nintendo wins E3 by doing nothing” memes because Nintendo fans really don’t care about anything except Nintendo and then act surprised when they only care about Nintendo when they try to be a little more open-minded (and fail) even if other E3s probably make more games built to last in comparisson, cuz we gay people only care about NINTENDO YOU KNOW? Shade asside... 

I was pleasantly surprised this E3, it wasn’t just a series of okay at best releases, a strong 9/10. 

tHAT WAS WHAT I WROTE IN PREPRATION....

BUT THEN???? IT WAS JUST THAT??? NO PRIME 4 NO ANYTHING LIKE JUST 3 GAMES BASICALLY? (maybe there was 5 games but eh) I mean smash is good.. It’s pretty much just an update of the last smash, every character is REALLY FUCKING GOOD BUT.... JUST THAT? jeez.. Like, the only stuff I wanted from it was Mario Party and Smash... Okay maybe that 1 Mecha game. Also I guess fornite is now on Switch but I can play that anywhere else really.

I guess a 7/10 is all I can give to just Smash, if there was a little more I’d give it a 9/10 for sure but... ehh Just Smash? jeez, fuck... i MEAN I kind of get it, Nintendo doesn’t do “e3″ normally, they usually do 1 big game at E3 and then wait a couple of months to do that little seasonal announcement thing they do across the year, ugh.. Okay. Yeah I guess i shouldn’t have expected much. Still isn’t it weird that Miyamoto was in Ubisoft’s E3 but not this one??? what!

Anyways

#e3 #i'll post that image at the end individually #long post #Sony #Nintendo #Bethesda #Microsoft

[r-chivesreviews-blog]

Splintered : a rant

*disclaimer: --not spoiler free-- pls these are just my opinions, I hope we can get along*

Summary:

Alyssa Gardner hears the whispers of bugs and flowers—precisely the affliction that landed her mother in a mental hospital years before. This family curse stretches back to her ancestor Alice Liddell, the real-life inspiration for Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Alyssa might be crazy, but she manages to keep it together. For now.

When her mother’s mental health takes a turn for the worse, Alyssa learns that what she thought was fiction is based in terrifying reality. The real Wonderland is a place far darker and more twisted than Lewis Carroll ever let on. There, Alyssa must pass a series of tests, including draining an ocean of Alice’s tears, waking the slumbering tea party, and subduing a vicious bandersnatch, to fix Alice’s mistakes and save her family. She must also decide whom to trust: Jeb, her gorgeous best friend and secret crush, or the sexy but suspicious Morpheus, her guide through Wonderland, who may have dark motives of his own.

Alright, this is my first book I finished in 2019, aaaannndd… I hated it, yay! A friend of mine recommended it to me because she had enjoyed it a lot, but I don’t share the same opinion as her (sorry, Heaven~!). This is not at all formal, it’s literally ranting. I’m sorry.

Alright, to start off, our main characters here are Alyssa, Jeb, and Morpheus. I’m just going to start out with saying I did not like Alyssa, not even a little bit. She starts out as an edgy emo teen, and just delves into a confusing and indecisive person later on. She’s cool, she skates, she hates other ‘normal’ girls; just everything you could ever ask for in a protagonist. Although, I will admit it made me laugh to know that she wore knee pads and shit when she went skating, because that’s not exactly my idea of someone who is so hard. Saftey first, Al. Oh, my god. Did I mention Jeb calls her skater girl, and she likes it. Just… puke.

Anyway, she’s just so annoyingly edgy, just clearly not fitting in. People apparently bully her for being related to the original Alice, which confuses me greatly. How did they even find out? Is it even bullying just making shitty Wonderland jokes? I’m so confused by this, but apparently she just needed to be different, and needed to be an outcast. Honestly, it would make more sense to me if they just bullied her for being a goth.

Onto our first love interest; Jebediah Holt. Our emo hunk, one of Alyssa’s oldest friends. His character is pretty flat and boring. He’s deep, has a dark past, and he’s in love with Alyssa. Did I mention he’s unattainable because he’s dating a supermodel-esque girl who is a bitch to our main character for no reason. Seriously. Like she seems like she could be a nice girl. She shows remorse for some things, the only thing making her mean to Alyssa is the fact that her boyfriend has the hots for her-- and that makes him the dick. Seriously, I hate this trope of dating a bitchy girl to try and forget your feelings for our lovely protagonist. It’s just horrible ok.

Anyway, back to Jeb.There’s not much for me to say about him, I just didn’t like him at all as a character. Just his style already put me off, but of course that’s just personal preference. He’s just… alpha male. A Chad to the core. He gets angry so easily, so unnecessarily. He treats Alyssa like she’s a child, bosses her around even after it’s obvious that she knows what’s going on here. He doesn’t let her make any decisions on her own. If she talks to someone he doesn’t like, he fights them. If she starts doing something he doesn’t want her to, he just lifts her up and carries her away. He’s just so controlling and moody and I hate it. He’s also just really fucking horny apparently, always on Alyssa’s ass any moment he can get there, in completely inappropriate situations.

But to be fair, Alyssa is also some virginal teen who has never touched anyone of the opposite sex apparently. She gets all hot and bothered any time he gets close, and she hyper focuses on things about him instead of the WHOLE TWISTED WONDERLAND AROUND THEM. Anyway, let’s get onto the last main character, and my favorite; Morpheus.

Morpheus is yet another edgy guy in love with Alyssa, and honestly I just imagine him to look like Brendon Urie in his music video I Write Sins Not Tragedies. He wears hats all the time, and has gloves, and a British accent. He’s supposed to be the caterpillar, but I really don’t know how he fits in that role. He comes off more as a Mad Hatter type.

He’s the most confusing person in this whole series, because what the fuck are his motives even. They change at the blink of an eye to just random ass things, but he always has an explanation. Shit goes wrong and he’s like ‘yup, just as planned. This is exactly how I knew it would go.’ Like…. Please stop. Be a normal person, Morpheus. He’s a sleaze too, always hitting on Alyssa and touching her when she clearly doesn’t want to be touched. But, no, it’s alright because she only thought it was going to be inappropriate. Maybe just… tell her what you’re planning on doing so she doesn’t fight you immediately.

Did I mention he’s a moth? Cause he’s a moth. Literally, just stole the look of a human, but his true form is a moth. Alyssa is flirting and falling in love with a magical bug. Gross.

Alright, so the story I didn’t mind so much in the beginning. I actually really enjoyed the whole twisted Wonderland, and all the interpretations of it. I liked her going in and undoing what Alice did, but finding out things were not exactly as the famous story said. Honestly, I’m not really even going to go too much into the story, it’s just confusing as fuck, and the majority of the book is her just going around and doing as she’s told while she gets stuck in between two dudes in a pissing contest, fighting for her love.

The first half of the book really goes nowhere, and then in the last few chapters it seems like the author just threw a bunch of shit in to try and make sense of it all. It was awful, and barely understandable. Morpheus was apparently behind it all, somehow knowing everything would go a certain way, even when it seems like he doesn’t and he loses hope. Nope, he knew Alyssa was going to do what she did despite her making that decision herself (for the first time in the goddamn book, and still apparently someone was pulling the strings!)

Alyssa’s relationships with everyone were just so weak. She would say she loved Jeb and be in his arms, but the next minute she’s all lusty after Morpheus for seemingly no reason other than he’s hot and apparently they were somewhat friends as kids. Don’t get me wrong, I liked Morpheus way better than Jeb, but make up your mind, Alyssa.

She gets mad at our poor mothman and then forgives him within seconds more times than I can count. Oof, I’m just going back to the annoying characters, sorry. It’s just the only thing that really stood out to me, and that’s not a good thing. I can’t even remember half the plot because I’m just so pissed and confused at all these characters. Like, literally the only scene I remember vividly was Alyssa going a little crazy at the tea party and fucking belly dancing on the table while Jeb was all bug eyed and trying to get her to stop (but not really?), like I hated that scene so much. Uncomfortable and unpleasant.

I feel like I’m ranting and this is going on for too long and I don’t know what I’m saying anymore. So, yes, I hated this book. I thought it was awful, but putting those feelings aside… Morpheus is my daddy and he deserved a lot better than shit Alyssa choosing gross Jeb over him. He’s a fucking MAgIcaL MOtHMaN, ALYssA. JeB IS JuST aN EDgY ARtiSt SKatER DuDe.

P.S just learned its a series and OH BoY

#splintered #books #book reviews #rant #reading #sorry this is fucking awful #i didnt prepare for this #figured i would just let my first post be shit so it only goes up from her

[wbwest]

New Post has been published on WilliamBruceWest.com

New Post has been published on http://www.williambrucewest.com/2017/04/28/west-week-ever-pop-culture-review-42817/

West Week Ever: Pop Culture In Review - 4/28/17

So the big media news this week was the announcement of the DC Comics streaming service, which will be the home of the long-delayed live action Titans series, as well as the third season of the Young Justice cartoon. Other than that, very little else is known about the service. Most fans suspect that it’ll have the entire DC library, including animated films, older cartoons like Justice League, and live action series not currently on The CW/Fox. That’s a bit ambitious, though.

I’m reminded of how the concept of UPN was introduced to the public, with ads that touted all of the classic television that Paramount had given us over the years: Family Ties, Cheers, Star Trek – did this mean that this new network would become the exclusive home for those shows? No, it instead meant we were to brace ourselves for Love Boat: The Next Wave and Shasta McNasty. I get that same feeling here. DC has a great slate of animated films, and some classic animated series, but I think this might end up the hub for newer, untested properties. Take the Titans show for instance. TNT passed on that thing. TNT! They know drama! Sure, it’s produced by Greg Berlanti, but I feel like if it had any real promise, it wouldn’t be relegated to a digital platform that’s not Hulu or Netflix. Same with Young Justice. Sure, it had a following, and the reasons for its cancellation vary depending on who you ask, but expecting the fans to shell out for yet another streaming service isn’t exactly a gesture of goodwill. I’m not paying CBS to watch Star Trek, and I ain’t paying DC for this until I get some more details. Right now, though, it’s a typical DC announcement, where they rushed to announce before a lot of key aspects were in place.

Speaking of DC, NBC basically cancelled Powerless this week by removing all upcoming episodes from their schedule. It’s not a big surprise, as the entire cast deserved better than that show had to offer. In all honesty, I feel like the ties to the DC Universe actually hurt it. If they wanted to do the whole Workplace Comedy Set In A Comic Universe thing, then it probably would’ve worked better with generic superheroes and villains created just for the show. Sure, they mentioned Batman, and the Wayne family plays a pivotal role (which I also had problems with), but they showed Crimson Fox TWICE. CRIMSON FOX! Just mentioning Superman or Wonder Woman isn’t enough. Hell, they can mention those characters on The Middle and it wouldn’t violate any rights or copyright laws. No, this was a big case of Show, Don’t Tell and the show never really had a strong hand when all the cards were on the table. At least this frees up Ron Funches and Danny Pudi for bigger and better things.

I loved Kingsman: The Secret Service, so I am ALL IN for Kingsman: The Golden Circle. To be honest, I’m probably looking more forward to this than Star Wars Episode 8. Apparently, Kingsman is forced to team up with their American counterpart, Statesman, so it should be interesting to see how the teams play off each other. And I’m really hoping for some extreme American stereotypes. Based on Channing Tatum’s cowboy agent, I don’t think I’ll be disappointed.

In other movie news, Seth Rogen and Billy Eichner are rumored to be up for the roles of Pumbaa and Timon in Disney’s live action adaptation of The Lion King. I like both of these guys, but I really don’t even know why this movie is being made. I mean, sure, putting The Lion King on something is basically the same as printing money, but the recent debut of  the lackluster The Lion Guard showed that there’s a limit to how much you can mine from the property. I haven’t seen the live action adaptation of The Jungle Book, but I guess this will be like that? I mean, the whole thing is animals. How are they gonna do this? Maybe I’m overthinking it, but it just feels like Disney is out of ideas for the moment.

We got a trilogy, y’all! In a surprise move, M. Night Shyamalan tweeted that Glass would be released on January 18th, 2019, serving as the sequel to both Unbreakable and Split. I really enjoyed both of these movies, and it feels like M’s finally got his groove back, so this should be good.

In news that will only matter to you if you’re a Cornell alum, all-male a cappella group The Cayuga’s Waiters have been kicked off campus for hazing. And let me tell you, this couldn’t have happened to a shittier group of douchebags. When people think of a cappella, they always think of lame kids who probably did show choir in high school. And, in most cases, they’d be correct. The Waiters, however, were cut from different cloth. Originally a subset of the Cornell University Glee Club, they were basically a lewd fraternity that occasionally sang songs. Around 25 years ago, one of them wrote “We Didn’t Go To Harvard”, a parody of Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start The Fire”, and they’ve pretty much been coasting on that ever since. Their offstage behavior rivaled that of actual rock stars. For example, they got kicked out of a charity concert when one of their members reportedly peed in the corner of the stage. And while there were a few good guys in that group, the core members were THE WORST. They were basically a singing Duke rape scandal waiting to happen. According to news reports, the hazing included making new members take naked ice baths and having them rub IcyHot on each others’ balls. Considering they got shut down, I’m thinking there was more serious stuff that the paper couldn’t print, like elephant walks or something. Anyway, good riddance to bad rubbish. Bet they wish they’d gone to Harvard now!

Things You Might Have Missed This Week

Captain America: The First Avenger director Joe Johnston will direct The Chronicles of Narnia: The Silver Chair

Sony has given the Masters of the Universe film a December 18th, 2019 release date, but McG is no longer attached to direct. None of this matters, though, ‘cause this movie is never getting made.

Speaking of Sony, they’ve reportedly fired Dr Luke, and I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS! But there’s no way I’m putting them in a blog post, for them to be dissected and taken out of context.

One of the former Bachelors killed a dude. Nah, I don’t know his name or care enough to look it up. Bachelors are just as replaceable as Duggar kids. He will be forgotten again soon enough

Jeff Goldblum will reportedly return to the land of dinosaurs in the Jurassic World sequel.

Riverdale’s Reggie Mantle will be recast prior to season 2, as actor Ross Butler is committed to Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why, which is close to being renewed for a second season

Star Wars Episode IX’s release date has been revealed as May 23rd, 2019, which shifts the franchise’s releases out of the month of December

Darius “Eddie Winslow” McCrary posted the above pic, asking folks if they’d want a Family Matters reunion. Considering they both look like shit here, I’m leaning towards “no”

Speaking of TGIF reunions, Perfect Strangers stars Bronson Pinchot and Mark Linn-Baker reunited for Chiller Theatre Expo last weekend in New Jersey. Cousin Larry has aged appropriately, but Balki clearly discovered Crossfit/discount mail-order steroids.

Jeb Bush and Derek Jeter are in a group trying to buy the Miami Marlins. Hey, it’s better than ending up on Dancing with the Stars!

Next fall, Steve Harvey’s TV talk show, Steve Harvey, will move to Los Angeles, and will take on a new format as Steve.

With this week’s series finale of Bates Motel, A&E announced they’re abandoning scripted television and moving to a reality show model.

Maybe it’s just the mood I’m in this week, but nothing really had the West Week Ever. Try harder next week, America!

#A Cappella #Batman #Comics #Cornell #DC #Movies #Music #Pop #Star Trek #Star Wars #Television #West Week Ever

[thisdaynews]

Why Is Andrew Yang Still in This Race?

New Post has been published on https://thebiafrastar.com/why-is-andrew-yang-still-in-this-race/

Why Is Andrew Yang Still in This Race?

BEAUFORT, S.C.—Andrew Yang was sitting here in a rented silver Suburban outside a black chamber of commerce surrounded by five members of his rapidly growing campaign staff when he saw a new Fox News poll in which he was tied for fifth in the sprawling Democratic presidential primary.

He stared at the screen of his phone and scrolled.

Story Continued Below

“Three percent!” Yang said, in his characteristically dry, droll way. “This team. Is the team. That’s going to go … all. The. Way. To the White House!”

Yang breezily walked into the chamber building and got onto a packed elevator. To the county party chair squeezed into a corner, Yang excitedly passed along the results of the poll, listing in order the only people who were ahead of him—a former vice president (Joe Biden) and three high-profile senators (Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, Kamala Harris).

“And thenme!” he exclaimed, flashing a goofy, exaggerated smile.

Perhaps you haven’t noticed, but Andrew Yang is … surging? It sounds crazy, and who knows how long it lasts? But for now he is one of 10 candidates who have qualified through sufficiently robust polling and fundraising for this fall’s third and fourth debates. The exhausting cluster of Oval Office aspirants, at least for these purposes, has been whittled to this: the aforementioned top four, two more senators, a mayor, a former member of Congress and … this guy. Yang is a 44-year-old entrepreneur from New York and a father of two young sons who’s never run for any office of any kind before this, and whose campaign is fueled by a deeply dystopian view of the near future (trucker riots, anybody?), a pillar of a platform that can come off as a gimmick (a thousand bucks a month for every American adult!), and a zeitgeisty swirl of podcasts, GIFs, tweets and memes. Last week, as a successful governor from a major state dropped out and the bottom half of the bloated field continued to flounder, Yang passed the 200,000 mark for unique donors—outpacing an array of name-known pols. He’s gotten contributions, on average $24 a pop, from 88 percent of the ZIP codes in the country, and he’s on track, he says, to raise twice as much money this quarter as he did last quarter. Just the other day, he made his Sunday news show debut.

It’s a phenomenon hard to figure—until you get up close and take in some strange political alchemy. At the heart of Yang’s appeal is a paradox. In delivering his alarming, existentially unsettling message of automation and artificial intelligence wreaking havoc on America’s economic, emotional and social well-being, he … cracks jokes. He laughs easily, and those around him, and who come to see him, end up laughing a lot, too. It’s not that Yang’s doing stump-speech stand-up. It’s more a certain nonchalant whimsy that leavens what he says and does. Sometimes his jokes fall flat. He can be awkward, but he also pointedly doesn’t appear to care. It’s weird, and it’s hard to describe, but I suspect that if Yang ever said something cringeworthy, as Jeb Bush did that time in 2016—“Please clap”—the audience probably would respond with mirth, not pity. Critics ding his ambit of proposals as fanciful or zany (getting rid of the penny, empowering MMA fighters, lowering the voting age to 16) and question the viability of his “Freedom Dividend,” considering its sky-high price tag (“exciting but not realistic,” Hillary Clinton decided when she considered the general notion in the 2016 cycle). And his campaign coffers are chock-full of small-number contributors and even $1 donors. Still, at this angry, fractious time, and in this primary that’s already an edgy, anxious slog, Yang and his campaign somehow radiate an ambient joviality. Of his party’s presidential contestants, he’s the cheerful doomsayer.

His most foolproof laugh line—“the opposite of Donald Trump is an Asian man who likes math”—suggests that his candidacy is premised on distinguishing himself from the president the same way as his fellow challengers. But it’s not quite that simple. He’s attracting support from an unorthodox jumble of citizens, from a host of top technologists, but from penitent Trump voters, too. He’s one of only two Democrats (along with Sanders) who ticks 10 percent or higher when Trump voters are asked which of the Democrats they might go for—a factoid Yang uses as evidence that he’ll win “easy” if he’s the nominee come November of next year. Trump, of course, is the president, and Yang (let’s not get carried away) remains a very long long shot to succeed him.

But to spend any time with Yang is to grapple with this unexpected Trump-Yang Venn diagram. While Yang talks in different, far less overtly divisive ways, identifies different scapegoats (robots, not immigrants) and offers different solutions (cash, not walls), he’s zeroed in on the same elemental problem Trump did en route to his shock of a win in ’16: A large portion of the populace is being left behind, and it’s not remotely OK. Similarly, Yang’s campaign packs an anti-Washington, convention-bucking, on-the-fly, filter-free vibe. There are four-letter hats—not MAGA, but MATH (Make America Think Harder). And his Trump train? It’s the Yang Gang. Yang is not thenot Trumpof the 2020 trail. “Yang is thenewTrump,” a traveling Trump-voter-turned-Yang-Gang-YouTuber told me.

There are plenty of differences, too, of course. To wit: In the chamber building, after the elevator disgorged a floor up, a lobby was filled with the bouncy beats of line dancing emanating from a different room. One of his staffers joked that Yang should join in. And then … he did. Apparently unafraid of looking silly, or potentially creating an embarrassing, indelible, campaign-altering moment with the presence not just of me but also a state-based reporter from The Associated Press, Yang proceeded to team up with a handful of senior citizens for what most onlookers ultimately agreed was a quite credible, rhythm-keeping rendition of the catchy “Cupid Shuffle.”

“Down, down, do your dance, do your dance,” went the lyrics—and Yang did.

“Get it, Andrew!” the group leader called into her microphone. “Lookin’ good!”

When it was over, Yang jogged around the room to hearty cheers, grinning and giving everybody high fives.

“Thanks for letting me crash your class,” he said to the head of Family Slide Dancers.

“Thank you all!” he said to the members of her class.

By the time we got back to the Suburban, my phone was buzzing nonstop in my pocket. A tweet of the video I shot was starting to zoom around the internet.

***

“We are basically fucked,”Yang said, sitting in the Suburban, earlier in the day, not too long after we met, “unless we un-fuck ourselves, systematically and collectively.”

This blunt declaration didn’t surprise me. That’s because I’d read his most recent book. It’s one heck of a downer.

InThe War on Normal People, which came out last year, Yang sketched a stark picture of “broken people” and “jobless zones” and “derelict buildings” and “widespread despair” and “hundreds of thousands of families and communities being pushed into oblivion” and “a society torn apart by ever-rising deprivation and disability” and a “best-case scenario” of “a hyper-stratified society like something out ofThe Hunger Games.”

“It’s possible that we may already be too defeated and opiated by the market to mount a revolution. We might just settle for making hateful comments online and watching endless YouTube videos with only the occasional flare-up of violence amid many quiet suicides,” he wrote.

“The group I worry about most is poor whites,” he added. “There will be more random mass shootings in the months ahead as middle-aged white men self-destruct and feel that life has no meaning.”

My copy of his book is littered with my disconsolate scribbles.

“Yikes.”

“… bleak …”

“… hellscape.”

Know what else, though, I penned into the margins?

“Ha!”

“When I was 13,” Yang wrote, for instance, “I had to have four teeth pulled in preparation for wearing braces. I was actually kind of excited about it because I saw my dad’s teeth and was like, ‘whatever it takes, let’s not have those.’” He said the answer for out-of-place workers was not a career as a home health care aide because “former truck drivers will not be excited to bathe grandma.”

And as we traveled around, a busy, six-stop day in this sweaty, marshy terrain—from Bluffton to Okatie to Beaufort, from town halls to meet-and-greets with local Democratic clubs to a quiet, private stop at a shelter for abused women and children—the laughter never stopped for long.

Nibbling on a belVita vanilla oat biscuit, he praised the company for marketing the product as a healthy option. “It’s, like, you’re clearly good for me,” he said, “and then it’s a fucking cookie for breakfast!”

He referred repeatedly to his $24 average donation. “My fans are cheaper than Bernie’s!”

Entering a Mexican restaurant for a town hall, he said, “The best thing about running for president is I walk into a room and people clap!” The crowd roared.

He wasn’t always this way. His parents came to America from Taiwan. His mother was a computer services administrator before becoming a pastel artist. His father grew up poor on a peanut farm and got a Ph.D. in physics at the University of California at Berkeley and worked for General Electric and IBM in New York. Yang described him as a “workaholic” and “a brusque lab geek.” Growing up in the suburbs of Westchester County, Yang as a kid was “angsty,” “brooding” and “sad,” he said. He read science fiction and fantasy and Herman Hesse and listened to Pearl Jam and Soundgarden and Sarah McLachlan and played piano and decent tennis and lots of Dungeons and Dragons. He was, for a time, a tad goth. He suffered racist slurs. At prep school at Phillips Exeter in New Hampshire, and then at college at Brown, where he majored in economics and political science, he began to come out of his shell. He started to lift weights, mostly to try to get dates, and was proud to be able to bench press 225 pounds eight to 10 times in a row.

Now, here in the Suburban, as we crossed the Broad River, I brought up “Rex and Lex.” That’s what Yang named his pecs, “Rex” for the right, “Lex” for the left, when he was lifting all those weights. I knew about this because he wrote about in his other, earlier book,Smart People Should Build Things. He “could jostle them on command,” he had written, “to make them ‘talk.’” Obviously, I wanted to hear more.

Yang obliged. Having shed his blue sport coat, he looked down at his chest, and he … channeled “Rex.”

“He’s, like, almost mute,” he said, “but he’s still like”—and here the candidate for president made his dad-bod-dormantpectoralisundulate under his checked, collared shirt and assumed a diminutive, sing-song cadence—“‘Andrew, I still have a little bit of voice left. You haven’t fed me in a long time. You used to looooove meeeeeee.’”

Zach Graumann, Yang’s 31-year-old campaign manager, looked some combination of mesmerized and mortified. “You’re such a tool,” he said.

Yang was undeterred. He was on a roll. He turned his attention to “Lex.”

“Oh man,” he lamented, “Lex is wimpier than Rex!”

Everybody inside the Suburban laughed and laughed.

***

At the town hall in Hilton Head—a standing-room-only crowd of mainly older folks wearing boat shoes and flip-flops—it was hard to miss the young guys in the pink hats.

They listened intently as Yang introduced himself. “Hello, everyone! I’m Andrew Yang, and I’m running for president! … I’m going to be honest. I’m the last person anyone thought was going to run for president, in terms of my high school, my upbringing. My parents were not like, ‘You’re gonna be president someday.’” This assertion drew laughs. After Brown and law school at Columbia and five unhappy months as a corporate attorney, he started a company (Stargiving.com) that failed, he said. He was the CEO of a company that succeeded. He launched a non-profit that did a little bit of both. Then Yang gave his political pitch, about truckers, and soon-to-be self-driving trucks, and so many other kinds of workers, and automation, and artificial intelligence, and the real reason he thinks Trump won—millions of jobs automated away in the most important Midwest swing states—and the coming “buzz saw” and “the race to the bottom” and “suicides, drug overdoses, anxiety, depression,” and how the average American life expectancy has declined for three straight years for the first time in a century, and how “D.C. is not up to it at all,” and about $1,000 a month for every adult.

“How am I doing so well?” he said. “It’s because Americans recognize the truth when they hear it.”

The guys in the pink hats were impressed.

“He nailed it,” Mike Gallagher, 29, told me after Yang finished.

“Awesome,” said Wayne Boyce, 28.

They had driven the hour or so up from Savannah, Georgia, and both of them said they had voted for Trump but would not be doing it again.

Ditto for their other friend. “He’s an asshole,” Jordan Snipes said of the president. “And he hasn’t done anything he said he was going to do.”

They were members, they all said, of the Yang Gang now.

I asked if there were others like them where they’re from.

“Most of our friends,” Snipes reported.

A few hours later, at the Mexican restaurant, I met the Yang Gang YouTuber. Russell Peterson, 43,from Union County, North Carolina, was with his wife, Elasa, who was wearing a MATH shirt, and their toddler son, Zephaniah—“country folks,” Peterson said, and “former Trump supporters.” He had a lot to say.

“We all saw a problem, and that’s why we elected Donald Trump,” he told me. “Because he was saying he was going to go in and he was going to drain the swamp. He was a larger-than-life figure, you know? We all knew that there was a problem. We just didn’t know what that problem was. But then, when you listen to Andrew Yang, you realize: Oh, yeah, it is automation—it’s not immigrants. It’s automation. We’re all losing our jobs. We’re all being phased out. I’m an ex-landscaper. I just saw yesterday they’ve got a mower that just goes and mows your yard, just like a Roomba, you know, does your house.”

And what’s he do for work now?

“This is what we do,” he said. “We follow Andrew Yang full-time.”

He doesn’t work for the campaign, but …

“This has become my passion. There is nothing more important than getting this man elected,” he said, breaking down his video equipment.

“I’m tired of politicians. I don’t want a politician. I want somebody who’s going to tell me the fuckin’ truth, tell me what’s going on, and thenprovidesomething that’s actually going to impact my life! Since I’ve been an adult, there’s not beenonepolitician that has directly impacted my life, but I promise you that freedom dividend and putting $2,000 a month into my household would directly impact my life. I mean,game over.”

He wasn’t finished.

“People are so disillusioned,” he said. “Donald Trump? He was the WWE superstar guy. You know, he was going to take his metal chair into Washington, and he was just going to use it on everybody. We were finally going to be working like we were supposed to be working—and I’ve only seen the country get more and more divided. And then when you have Trump acting like he’s acting, I can’t support that, bro’. And then there’s a lot of people in the center who are like me who are moving over to Andrew Yang because we don’t like what we see. Wedon’tlike what Trump has done to the country. He’s only divided us more and more. So now we actually have some solutions and a guy who’stalkingabout solutions—so, like, let’s get this guy in, because he makes too much damn sense!”

All day long, everywhere we went, Yang was asked about Trump. How was he going to handle him? How was he going to debate him? How was he going to beat him?

He said he “would make him seem ridiculous.” He said he “would just diminish him by dismissing his arguments and making him seem like the buffoon and joke that he is.” He said Trump was “fire”—and he said he was “ice.” He told people he was on the debate team in high school that went to the world championships in London. He said he would “use humor.”

And at the last stop of the day, here at the Grand Army of the Republic Hall, outside of which I spotted parked a red Ford F250 pickup truck with a bumper sticker that read TRUMP, the throng of a couple hundred that had gathered couldn’t fit inside. They spilled out onto the lawn off to the side. “Let’s do it!” Yang hollered. He had no microphone. “Let’s project!”

And at this last event the last question was about Trump.

“When you become the nominee,” a woman asked, “how will you stand up to that nastiness in the White House?”

“Voters around the country have said to me they cannot wait to see me debate Donald Trump,” Yang said. He was all about “logic and reason and problem-solving” while Trump was “all bluster, and Americans can tell the difference very quickly,” he said, snapping his fingers. “There’s a reason he hasn’t touched me,” Yang continued. “Because he knows I’m the wrong person to touch. His supporters are all coming my way. … I’m peeling off Trump supporters right and left.” And one more thing: “I’m better at the internet than he is!”

More laughter.

“On that note …”

A snaking line of people waited for pictures. The sun set. Through the buggy, muggy haze, a single orange orb of a streetlight glowed past clumps of spectral Spanish moss. Yang autographed MATH hats. Flashes from phones pulsed in the dark.

Read More

#Andrew #Foreign #Politics #still

[mialipsky-blog]

Winter Wedding Dubbed by the Couple as a ‘Champagne-Soaked Dance Party’

I think it should be a new thing that we ask all couples how to describe their wedding day in five words or less. Because this stunning duo, came up with THE best one: ‘Champagne-Soaked Dance Party’. Now, doesn’t that sound like a wedding you want to attend? SoCo Events added their pretty touch and it’s classic elegance at it’s best. Join me in The Vault for more captured by Bonnie Sen.

Share this gorgeous gallery on

  From the newlyweds… How We Met: This question has a few answers. According to Facebook, we cross paths at some point while we were both at Vanderbilt in 2009. Technically, we were first introduced, as grown ups, at Hill Country BBQ as we were both helping out with a young Vandy alumni fundraising event. It was an informal host committee meeting and Matt was the only person at the table that I did not know. I thought he was cute and he apparently thought I “looked SO Vanderbilt.” However, we did not speak much at the dinner, besides a few stolen glances and watching Matt spill BBQ sauce all over his suit. After that encounter, a mutual friend and I were gchatting as I was complaining about the lack of nice men in DC. This friend, Theo, suggested that he could set me up with his old Vandy buddy Matt McGrath the next time he was in DC and we’d be a good match. About two weeks later, I unexpectedly bumped into Matt at a friend of a friend’s house party in Adams Morgan. After asking him to pour a drink, for reasons unknown to me, the next words that blurted out of my mouth were “Theo says we should date” Matt took it in stride with some mild amusement.

What was the bride’s first impression? My first impression of Matt was that he was very cute and how did I never lay eyes on him while I was at Vanderbilt. He was charming, polite, and well dressed, albeit a messy eater.

What was the groom’s first impression? I have always found Sarah captivating because she’s this tall, beautiful woman who is charming, assertive and unafraid all at the same time. About two minutes into our first conversation, Sarah told me that we shared a close mutual friend in New York, who had told her that she and I should date.  I took a sip of my drink and responded, “Well, I think we should try that.”

I also love to read, and Sarah said she did too, so I gave her a little test.  After our first date I offered her a couple books on politics that I thought she’d like.  (Sarah still makes fun of me for giving her “homework.”)  But she thanked me for the recommendations and finished both books by our third date.

Our First Date: Our first real “date” was on a Wednesday night at Brasserie Beck on March 14, 2012. After hitting it off majorly on Saturday night, I was expecting Matt to immediately call/text/date me. By Tuesday morning and radio silence I was a bit panicked. But, rather than a rash of somewhat inconsequential texts or emails that I had come to expect in the DC dating pool, Matt actually CALLED me on Tuesday afternoon and asked me to meet him on Wednesday night. He suggested Brasserie Beck, which was about 5 minutes from my then apartment. He asked if I could do 8 PM. At the time, I was a teacher with the Teach For America program and started my days at 5:45 AM, meaning dinner time for me was the early bird special at 5:30 pm, so I assumed he meant for a drink. I admittedly tried to arrive late, against my natural inclination, and actually stood around the corner and waited for him to walk in first. When we were seated for actual dinner, I was surprised – he was so grown up was my initial reaction, an actual meal! I also had sort of already eaten dinner. He was very sweet and charming and tried to impress me with his French and his reasoning for choosing a Belgian restaurant (he interned at the EU in Brussels during college). We ended up talking until around midnight – way past my bedtime.

How long did you date before getting engaged: We dated from March 2012 to January 2015

Where and How We Got Engaged: (Matt and I had discussed getting engaged a bit and I already knew that over Christmas he was planning to ask my dad permission (over a scotch at 10 AM during my nephew’s breakfast with Santa, it turns out). In his very Matt way, he had told me to plan for “Q3 2015” – obviously trying to make light of the situation while reassuring me. During 2013 and 2014, I was traveling quite a bit for work and had racked up a number of frequent flier miles. We were originally planning to take a trip to Argentina, but the flights and times didn’t seem to work out. Instead, we decided to go to Northern India. We arrived in Delhi in January 2015; I had gotten my nails done just in case he was going to pop the question. However, after our first night and nada, I sort of assumed that he wouldn’t want to carry a diamond all over India in the next 10 days, so assumed it wasn’t happening. During our amazing trip we kept get upgraded to nicer rooms or suites and the staff kept congratulating us and calling me Mrs. McGrath. Every time, Matt sort of nervously laughed – I assumed since he was getting awkward at the insinuation.

Our final night in India, we were in Jaipur – the Gem City in Rajasthan. Matt arranged for us to have dinner at the Rambagh Palace, once the residence of the Maharaja of Jaipur, which was converted to a hotel when the royal family moved out in the late 1950s. Before we left for dinner, he had arranged for a nail appointment for me in the hotel. I wasn’t sure if it was a sign or if he was just thinking my curry stained polish was looking a little rough. Once we left for dinner, Matt started to sweat profusely. Arriving at the hotel, the GM met us at the door and gave us a tour of the palace. Again, the royal treatment seemed a bit odd. Finally we concluded at a giant fountain in the back of the palace that was spraying water way into the air and beautifully lit up. Matt got down on one knee and asked if I would marry him. Earlier in the day, he had bought a little emerald bracelet to propose with and had the real ring waiting for me in DC. We then had the most amazing 6 course menu on gold plates, followed by a huge chocolate cake on a bed of roses. Truly magical!

How long were you engaged before getting married: We were engaged exactly 1 year and 7 days. We initially thought about the weekend prior, so we would have an exactly one year engagement, but thank GOD we did not as that turned out to be the weekend of the snowpocalypse and were totally snowed in. I really wanted a winter wedding and Matt did not want a long engagement. He asked if we could go to the court house multiple times to just make it official already.

Bride’s Favorite Wedding Detail: I have too many to count, but I think my favorite detail was the custom made soft seating from Edge Floral. It was a beautiful mirrored gold chair, couch and table, covered in a rich velvet. It was so beautiful and made the space cozy and comfortable and kept everyone in the room.

I also LOVED the welcome bag details – the theme of DC came across with all of the customized stickers and the water bottle wraps, not to mention the capital shaped cookies and campaign pins! The velvet bags that held the hangover kits were also so fun and luxe.

Groom’s Favorite Wedding Detail: I was totally blown away by the attention to detail that Soco Events and the Four Seasons put into the wedding reception.  We really wanted a reception where all our family and friends would dance, so I appreciated the cocktail napkins that helped people build their confidence.  I think one said, “Trust me, you can dance. -Vodka”.  Note from Sarah – Matt picked out great crushed velvet tuxedo slippers for himself and all the groomsmen

Biggest Surprise of Wedding: (from Matt) When Sarah and I started our first dance, I was totally confused when at first I couldn’t recognize what the band was playing.  Little did I know, Sarah had asked them to play an acoustic version of “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen, which was the first song we danced to when we started dating in 2012.  We still laugh about “Call Me Maybe” being our first dance — maybe one day it will be a classic!

From Sarah: I loved surprising Matt with our first dance song. Call Me Maybe always makes me think of our first few months of dating, when we would listen and dance to it nonstop.  But my favorite surprise of the wedding was my parent’s participating in the Horah! It was SO funny to watch my very catholic mom get hoisted up in a chair – something she vowed she would never do (“too dangerous”). As they lifted her into the air she made the sign of the cross – which just made the whole thing funnier.

Most Sentimental/Touching Moment of the Wedding: (from Matt) Sarah was raised Catholic and I was raised Jewish, so we wanted a wedding service that would reflect who we are together and be inclusive of our families.  I spent a lot of time writing our own wedding service with my cousins Monsignor Robert Harris of Brooklyn, New York and Rabbi Dan Levin of Boca Raton, Florida.  We absolutely loved the sermons they gave, where Monsignor Bob talked about the theme of “harmony” from the Old Testament and Rabbi Dan talked about the theme of “love” from the New Testament.  We felt a lot of love in the chapel and it really set the tone for the rest of the evening.

From Sarah: My dad is a big dude. Very manly and tough, but when he came into the room to see me in my dress for the first time he was basically a crying ball of mush. It was so sweet and touching to see how much he cares and loves my family in a moment like that.

Wedding Favors or any special décor details: I LOVED the customized wedding campaign pins that Blair designed. During the wedding, I was working on the Jeb 2016 campaign and had worked in republican fundraising for the past 3 years, while Matt is an Obama White House alumnae and works with Sec. Madeline Albright. Since our wedding was the day before the Iowa primaries and everyone who knows us, knows our political involvement, it was a really fun way to incorporate the election year, DC and politics in a fun and playful (read no political arguing!) way.

First Dance Song: Call Me Maybe – acoustic. A fun surprise to Matt. By the end, all of our guests were clapping and singing along.

Wedding Theme: My vision for the theme, was a black tie evening, that was still a cozy escape from the winter, like a warm fire and hot drink. I wanted it to feel a little old school in that way.

Four Words that Describe the Wedding: Champagne soaked dance party

Photography: Bonnie Sen | Event Planning: SoCo Events | Floral Design: Edge Flowers | Wedding Dress: Modern Trousseau | Invitations: Creative Parties | Church: Dahlgren Chapel | Bridesmaids Dresses: Adrianna Papell | Makeup: Lorna Basse | Hair: Bridal Hair By Remona | Lighting: Digital Lightning | Hotel: Four Seasons Resort The Biltmore Santa Barbara | Bridal Boutique: Hitched Salon | Groom's Tux: The Black Tux | Linens: Nuage Designs | Music: Elan Artists | Rentals: DC Rentals

© Style Me Pretty, 2017. | Permalink | Comments | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Post categories: Real Weddings, The Blog, Traditional Elegance

Winter Wedding Dubbed by the Couple as a ‘Champagne-Soaked Dance Party’ published first on their blog to my feed

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Winter Wedding Dubbed by the Couple as a ‘Champagne-Soaked Dance Party’

I think it should be a new thing that we ask all couples how to describe their wedding day in five words or less. Because this stunning duo, came up with THE best one: ‘Champagne-Soaked Dance Party’. Now, doesn’t that sound like a wedding you want to attend? SoCo Events added their pretty touch and it’s classic elegance at it’s best. Join me in The Vault for more captured by Bonnie Sen.

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  From the newlyweds… How We Met: This question has a few answers. According to Facebook, we cross paths at some point while we were both at Vanderbilt in 2009. Technically, we were first introduced, as grown ups, at Hill Country BBQ as we were both helping out with a young Vandy alumni fundraising event. It was an informal host committee meeting and Matt was the only person at the table that I did not know. I thought he was cute and he apparently thought I “looked SO Vanderbilt.” However, we did not speak much at the dinner, besides a few stolen glances and watching Matt spill BBQ sauce all over his suit. After that encounter, a mutual friend and I were gchatting as I was complaining about the lack of nice men in DC. This friend, Theo, suggested that he could set me up with his old Vandy buddy Matt McGrath the next time he was in DC and we’d be a good match. About two weeks later, I unexpectedly bumped into Matt at a friend of a friend’s house party in Adams Morgan. After asking him to pour a drink, for reasons unknown to me, the next words that blurted out of my mouth were “Theo says we should date” Matt took it in stride with some mild amusement.

What was the bride’s first impression? My first impression of Matt was that he was very cute and how did I never lay eyes on him while I was at Vanderbilt. He was charming, polite, and well dressed, albeit a messy eater.

What was the groom’s first impression? I have always found Sarah captivating because she’s this tall, beautiful woman who is charming, assertive and unafraid all at the same time. About two minutes into our first conversation, Sarah told me that we shared a close mutual friend in New York, who had told her that she and I should date.  I took a sip of my drink and responded, “Well, I think we should try that.”

I also love to read, and Sarah said she did too, so I gave her a little test.  After our first date I offered her a couple books on politics that I thought she’d like.  (Sarah still makes fun of me for giving her “homework.”)  But she thanked me for the recommendations and finished both books by our third date.

Our First Date: Our first real “date” was on a Wednesday night at Brasserie Beck on March 14, 2012. After hitting it off majorly on Saturday night, I was expecting Matt to immediately call/text/date me. By Tuesday morning and radio silence I was a bit panicked. But, rather than a rash of somewhat inconsequential texts or emails that I had come to expect in the DC dating pool, Matt actually CALLED me on Tuesday afternoon and asked me to meet him on Wednesday night. He suggested Brasserie Beck, which was about 5 minutes from my then apartment. He asked if I could do 8 PM. At the time, I was a teacher with the Teach For America program and started my days at 5:45 AM, meaning dinner time for me was the early bird special at 5:30 pm, so I assumed he meant for a drink. I admittedly tried to arrive late, against my natural inclination, and actually stood around the corner and waited for him to walk in first. When we were seated for actual dinner, I was surprised – he was so grown up was my initial reaction, an actual meal! I also had sort of already eaten dinner. He was very sweet and charming and tried to impress me with his French and his reasoning for choosing a Belgian restaurant (he interned at the EU in Brussels during college). We ended up talking until around midnight – way past my bedtime.

How long did you date before getting engaged: We dated from March 2012 to January 2015

Where and How We Got Engaged: (Matt and I had discussed getting engaged a bit and I already knew that over Christmas he was planning to ask my dad permission (over a scotch at 10 AM during my nephew’s breakfast with Santa, it turns out). In his very Matt way, he had told me to plan for “Q3 2015” – obviously trying to make light of the situation while reassuring me. During 2013 and 2014, I was traveling quite a bit for work and had racked up a number of frequent flier miles. We were originally planning to take a trip to Argentina, but the flights and times didn’t seem to work out. Instead, we decided to go to Northern India. We arrived in Delhi in January 2015; I had gotten my nails done just in case he was going to pop the question. However, after our first night and nada, I sort of assumed that he wouldn’t want to carry a diamond all over India in the next 10 days, so assumed it wasn’t happening. During our amazing trip we kept get upgraded to nicer rooms or suites and the staff kept congratulating us and calling me Mrs. McGrath. Every time, Matt sort of nervously laughed – I assumed since he was getting awkward at the insinuation.

Our final night in India, we were in Jaipur – the Gem City in Rajasthan. Matt arranged for us to have dinner at the Rambagh Palace, once the residence of the Maharaja of Jaipur, which was converted to a hotel when the royal family moved out in the late 1950s. Before we left for dinner, he had arranged for a nail appointment for me in the hotel. I wasn’t sure if it was a sign or if he was just thinking my curry stained polish was looking a little rough. Once we left for dinner, Matt started to sweat profusely. Arriving at the hotel, the GM met us at the door and gave us a tour of the palace. Again, the royal treatment seemed a bit odd. Finally we concluded at a giant fountain in the back of the palace that was spraying water way into the air and beautifully lit up. Matt got down on one knee and asked if I would marry him. Earlier in the day, he had bought a little emerald bracelet to propose with and had the real ring waiting for me in DC. We then had the most amazing 6 course menu on gold plates, followed by a huge chocolate cake on a bed of roses. Truly magical!

How long were you engaged before getting married: We were engaged exactly 1 year and 7 days. We initially thought about the weekend prior, so we would have an exactly one year engagement, but thank GOD we did not as that turned out to be the weekend of the snowpocalypse and were totally snowed in. I really wanted a winter wedding and Matt did not want a long engagement. He asked if we could go to the court house multiple times to just make it official already.

Bride’s Favorite Wedding Detail: I have too many to count, but I think my favorite detail was the custom made soft seating from Edge Floral. It was a beautiful mirrored gold chair, couch and table, covered in a rich velvet. It was so beautiful and made the space cozy and comfortable and kept everyone in the room.

I also LOVED the welcome bag details – the theme of DC came across with all of the customized stickers and the water bottle wraps, not to mention the capital shaped cookies and campaign pins! The velvet bags that held the hangover kits were also so fun and luxe.

Groom’s Favorite Wedding Detail: I was totally blown away by the attention to detail that Soco Events and the Four Seasons put into the wedding reception.  We really wanted a reception where all our family and friends would dance, so I appreciated the cocktail napkins that helped people build their confidence.  I think one said, “Trust me, you can dance. -Vodka”.  Note from Sarah – Matt picked out great crushed velvet tuxedo slippers for himself and all the groomsmen

Biggest Surprise of Wedding: (from Matt) When Sarah and I started our first dance, I was totally confused when at first I couldn’t recognize what the band was playing.  Little did I know, Sarah had asked them to play an acoustic version of “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen, which was the first song we danced to when we started dating in 2012.  We still laugh about “Call Me Maybe” being our first dance — maybe one day it will be a classic!

From Sarah: I loved surprising Matt with our first dance song. Call Me Maybe always makes me think of our first few months of dating, when we would listen and dance to it nonstop.  But my favorite surprise of the wedding was my parent’s participating in the Horah! It was SO funny to watch my very catholic mom get hoisted up in a chair – something she vowed she would never do (“too dangerous”). As they lifted her into the air she made the sign of the cross – which just made the whole thing funnier.

Most Sentimental/Touching Moment of the Wedding: (from Matt) Sarah was raised Catholic and I was raised Jewish, so we wanted a wedding service that would reflect who we are together and be inclusive of our families.  I spent a lot of time writing our own wedding service with my cousins Monsignor Robert Harris of Brooklyn, New York and Rabbi Dan Levin of Boca Raton, Florida.  We absolutely loved the sermons they gave, where Monsignor Bob talked about the theme of “harmony” from the Old Testament and Rabbi Dan talked about the theme of “love” from the New Testament.  We felt a lot of love in the chapel and it really set the tone for the rest of the evening.

From Sarah: My dad is a big dude. Very manly and tough, but when he came into the room to see me in my dress for the first time he was basically a crying ball of mush. It was so sweet and touching to see how much he cares and loves my family in a moment like that.

Wedding Favors or any special décor details: I LOVED the customized wedding campaign pins that Blair designed. During the wedding, I was working on the Jeb 2016 campaign and had worked in republican fundraising for the past 3 years, while Matt is an Obama White House alumnae and works with Sec. Madeline Albright. Since our wedding was the day before the Iowa primaries and everyone who knows us, knows our political involvement, it was a really fun way to incorporate the election year, DC and politics in a fun and playful (read no political arguing!) way.

First Dance Song: Call Me Maybe – acoustic. A fun surprise to Matt. By the end, all of our guests were clapping and singing along.

Wedding Theme: My vision for the theme, was a black tie evening, that was still a cozy escape from the winter, like a warm fire and hot drink. I wanted it to feel a little old school in that way.

Four Words that Describe the Wedding: Champagne soaked dance party

Photography: Bonnie Sen | Event Planning: SoCo Events | Floral Design: Edge Flowers | Wedding Dress: Modern Trousseau | Invitations: Creative Parties | Church: Dahlgren Chapel | Bridesmaids Dresses: Adrianna Papell | Makeup: Lorna Basse | Hair: Bridal Hair By Remona | Lighting: Digital Lightning | Hotel: Four Seasons Resort The Biltmore Santa Barbara | Bridal Boutique: Hitched Salon | Groom's Tux: The Black Tux | Linens: Nuage Designs | Music: Elan Artists | Rentals: DC Rentals

© Style Me Pretty, 2017. | Permalink | Comments | Add to del.icio.us Post tags: Post categories: Real Weddings, The Blog, Traditional Elegance