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#And that's because I am passionate towards it
tojisun · 6 hours
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Angsty thot on the the ghost x reader x soap blurb;
I've been thinking about the what if Soap did actually reciprocate Ghost's advances? For a moment, he forgets reader. Finally, FINALLY, Soap thinks... until the bliss dies down and he remembers reader and guilt sets in. Ghost's only all too happy to show off to reader. Being affectionate with Johhny, leaving whatever marks were left visible, staking a claim that he won.
Reader, of course, is dismayed and feels betrayed. But how much can she really feel? It fucking sucks, it does, that Ghost doesn't care what she thinks or feels and she wasn't in a committed relationship with Soap. So if they were to pursue a relationship, what can she really do about it?
HOW I AM AFTER READING THIS anon i wanna crawl into your mind and poke around your brain because how could you (ext)
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johnny knows he hasn’t been honest with himself lately. that, in the face of ghost’s desires—because nothing less could describe the fire in his lieutenant’s eyes; it’s all so heated and leashed. hungry. aching—he denies himself and pretends he cannot see what is crystal clear.
he pretends that every brushing touch was an accident, that every heavy look was a trick of the light. that the way simon calls his name—johnny, with the ‘y’ dripping from his mouth like honey—was all circumstantial.
friendly. platonic, truly.
but it’s becoming more frequent. more passionate. more territorial.
of course, it was all a matter of when, really, was johnny going to fall. and the answer, apparently, is right now.
his shirt is torn off his body, fatigues falling beside two pairs of boots. warm lips, fever-hot, are on his skin, tracing scalding trails that has him trembling. he feels jittery, bones rattling within his flesh. he feels untethered, floaty. nirvana pinched between his fingers.
then, he falls, body thudding against the mattress. the metal of his bed posts creaks, a gunshot in the silence, and johnny freezes. his mind catching up to his heart.
this isn’t—
simon towers over him, his scarred chest heaving in his ragged breaths. the mask is off, discarded to the floor, and johnny, he—
well.
he sees the man that his soul sings to—cheeks flushed, bright cherries, and eyes dark with yearning. simon looks at him like johnny’s all that matters in the world; like all that he’s fighting to live for is johnny.
johnny feels this bloating in the back of his throat, something in his heart swelling until all he tastes is his breaths. his lips wobble, teeth chattering. they stop at ghost’s tender touch, his callused hand cupping johnny’s cheek.
simon's thumb swipes at the skin just underneath his eyes. his lips, crooked, tug up in a smile. “y’r much too gorgeous, johnny.”
johnny doesn’t know what happened next, only that he was stuffed with a burn that scorches from within and engulfed whole; devoured every way possible until simon's marks—from teeth and just his overall brute strength—took. his throat aches, scratchy, and his skin throbs with the memory of their love-making.
he, well, he wept. he tucked his head on the crook of simon's neck, breathing him in, unable to explain the euphoria simmering in the pit of his stomach.
simon loves him. he desired him every way possible so who wouldn't—
who wouldn't lose themselves?
(johnny thinks of you and the memories blur; what had been fiery passion morphs into something ugly. into something cruel.)
there was something different in ghost's gait—that's the first thing you noticed upon walking into the mess hall. he was more relaxed, more open in a way you have never seen from him before. he even met your eyes as you walk towards their little huddled group, the first time in a while, and you are unable to look away because there was something in his gaze that you couldn't quite place.
it still spoke of danger, of a walled barrier that he firmly put between you two, but it was undiscernible.
still poised, though, for the hunt.
kyle greets you first, kind and gentle, but before you could reply to him, johnny's tugging you away. a protest builds on the tip of your tongue, ready to slip past your chapped lips, but you freeze, feet stumbling as the air is knocked out of your lungs.
"bonnie–"
"oh," you say, a whispered gasp, your eyes unable to drag from the bruises on johnny's neck. not made with unkind intensions, if the teeth mars were any indication.
briefly, you wondered if johnny's met someone else to satiate his desires. if, in your absence, he sought to snuff the burning need from someone else. you've been away for three months, after all, chasing a lead in shanghai and tracking them all the way to tianjin. it must have been too long for johnny too.
(you wonder why your heart twinges at the idea of johnny finding comfort in someone else that isn't you.)
but the thought is doused by an ice-cold realization.
"it's– you know that i–"
"oi, 'tavish," ghost's voice rings from behind you.
you tip your head back just enough to see him, to see with your eyes what must he must have done, but he's back to ignoring you again.
it seemed like now that you've noticed what it was that had him elated, ghost no longer wanted to interact with you. not a word nor a touch. not even a glance.
johnny bites his bottom lip, shoulders hunching into himself.
"i'm sor–"
"i have to go," you say, your voice even sounds foreign to your own ears. "i have to, uhm, to report."
you shuffle away from between them, your palm rising to press onto your chest as though that could truly stop the splintering of your heart. as though your heart was truly wounded and that the pressure could stop the bleeding.
but it aches. dear god, everything aches.
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ANON THIS HURT ME SO BAD AND I COULDNT HELP MYSELF FROM RAMBLING IM SORRY!! god im wailing so much like i literally was bug eyed staring at ur ask bc OW??? (btw reader is gn in this ghoap x reader angst)
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roguelov · 2 days
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Crimson Stained Petals (Chapter 4)
Summary: Set in the 1880s, rumors and mysteries swirled around a quaint town, mostly about a lord tucked far into the woods. Arriving in town, you could not deny your curiosities, but you were not here to stay. Or so you thought. Low on funds, and a job for a live-in servant advertised in the paper, you now found yourself in the home of Lord Morpheus - the source of all rumors. Passions and tensions will grow. Questions will be answered, but may come at a hefty price. And a promise may be broken. But, is Lord Morpheus, and those few residents, truly as scary as they seem?
Words Count: ~3.4k
Reader: Fem
Warnings: minor angst (dealing with nightmares and depression), mostly fluff, pining, blood (reader gets minor cut)
Chapter 3 and more chapters to come!
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Over the few days, Morpheus had noticed a dreary cloud forming and seemingly growing over your head. It casted its gloom and rain dampening your radiance. Your smile was not quite as bright, it barely reached your now sullen eyes. Your presence was no longer felt in every room. Your laughter, your occasional humming, your musical-like steps were gone. You were a shadow, a husk. And big by bit, you retreated from him; you actively avoided him, or so he believed.
“Lucienne,” Morpheus asked one evening.
The pair was in the study. Papers littered all over the desk along with uncapped inkwells and used fountain pens. They poured and poured over the dull necessities of maintaining the bookshop - going over profits, bills, shipments, and new orders.
Lucienne peered at her lord over her glasses quizzically. “Yes?”
“Have you spoken with our dear mortal recently?” Morpheus still stood over the desk and continued to scan over documents, trying not to look bothered by his inquiring question or your sudden change.
“No, I haven’t.”
A tension set in his jaw. “I see.”
Lucienne quickly picked up on Morphues’s displeasure. A smile tugged on the corners of her lips. She was not oblivious to her lord’s far more chirper attitude since welcoming you into the manor. “May I ask what brought up this question?”
“Curiosity,” he replied nonchalantly.
Lucienne hummed, unconvinced. “Curiosity? Or concern?”
Her question stirred a reaction out of him. Morpheus whipped his head, now facing Lucienne directly. “And if I am, is there anything wrong in worrying about her?” His question was one of concern for you, yet his tone in which he spoke was biting - what exactly was Lucienne implying?
Lucienne’s smile only grew. She calmly responded, “No, sir.”
Upon seeing Lucienne’s calmness, Morpheus’s shoulders instantly dropped. His anger was misplaced. All the fight was drained from him, and soon the truth spilled out. “She -“ he sighed - “she does not seem happy and … and I do not know if it is because of living here or because of troubled nights.”
Lucienne thought of how there was an easy solution to his conundrum: he should speak with you. However, she held her tongue this time and instead opted to ask a question regarding you. “Troubled nights?”
“The other night, she spoke of having a nightmare.” Morpheus’s eyes shone with a heavy sorrow. “She … she was utterly frightened, Lucienne. Her fear nearly choked me.”
Lucienne frowned. “I was not aware, but a nightmare is a nightmare. There is not much one can do.”
Morpheus sighed, dropping into his chair. He tipped his head back and stared blankly up at the high ceiling. His heart - ancient and heavily barricaded - ached to see you smile. Just once more, just for a moment. In such a brief period, you had invaded his thoughts. He did not realize he craved it, sought it out, until it was taken from him.
Taken.
It seemed many things were taken from him in recent years. He pushed aside those thoughts and painful memories. He ran his hands over his face then through his tousled hair. Such complex feelings swirled inside his chest and constricted his heart.
“You care for her.” Morpheus lifted his head, looking towards Lucienne. She continued, “Which is never a bad thing, sir. She has brought new life here.”
And in you, she thought.
“I care for all of you,” he answered, dismissing her comment.
“You do, and we appreciate it.”
He raised an eyebrow at the weighted pause at the end of her sentence. “But?”
She smiled to herself. “I believe the care you feel for us and her are different.”
Morpheus frowned. Was he truly so easy to read? Did he truly become enamored with his housekeeper so quickly like a tale of forbidden romance? Did he truly want a partner … or did he want something else? He turned his head away, grumbling to himself.
Care? If one could call it such.
Does a farmer not care for his slaughter? Care, hunger, desire, it all can twist together. They can form into complex knots, making it impossible to tell where one may begin or end.
“For you, my lord.”
A beautiful picturesque rose dripping in a passionate red appeared in front of Morpheus’s face. He was working tediously in his study, and surprisingly failed to hear him. He just appeared, a magical and strange habit of his.
Morpheus blinked, gently taking the rose out of his hand. “Oh, uh, thank you.”
He smiled warmly like a sunny day. His wondrous new grander had already made such a change in the once dismal manor. Colors of all sorts were injected into the very foundation. Flowers bloomed wildly and freely, life blossomed with a new fever. “I thought you might like it, sir. Red suits you perfectly.”
”How do you do it, Lucienne?” Morphues whispered softly, changing the conversation. His voice was filled with sorrow as memories resurfaced. Sweet, painful memories, ones he wished he could forget yet also wouldn’t trade anything in the world for they were more precious than any gold or jewelry.
“Meaning what, sir?”
”To be close to her, to not be affected by her?”
Ah.
”Well, someone taught me control.” Lucienne slowly organized papers. “Someone had once found me in an awful state and was able to bring me back to my senses. Now, part of me cannot bare the smell of human blood without my stomach twisting into disgust.”
Morpheus’s eyes softened.
Lucienne gathered up the papers, ready to part of the night. “A solution to your problem: perhaps you can try to talk to her and cheer her up, sir. I’m sure she would appreciate the gesture.”
He raised an eyebrow. “And how would I do that?”
She chuckled, almost in a knowing way, and strolled out of the study. “I believe you will figure it out, sir.”
The soft click of the door echoed in the now quiet, lonely space. Morpheus peered over to the window with its curtains drawn. Even drawn closed, the setting sunlight streamed through the cracks trying to warm the earth in its last moments. Tilting his head, he saw the surrounding woods fade in the dying light. As his gaze darted around taking in the surroundings, it landed on a corner of dark greens and deep reds. Lucienne’s words replayed in his head. He was on his feet, already looking for you before he fully understood it himself. His feet carried him downstairs towards your room, however he stopped in the dining room. Looking ahead, he instead saw you sitting in the sun room. You were on the couch with your back to him and your head bowed. He immediately changed course.
Quietly, he opened the door. The potted trees and fauna stretched its shadows and created unique jagged shapes. A soft orange bathed over the room. The fractured soft light shone through the glass and casted you in an ethereal halo of twinkling gold.
You were a goddess of light.
As he walked towards you, you did not stir. You had heard him by the high pitched squeak of the door and the faint clacking of the heels on the tile floor. He stopped by your side, peering down at you. “I see you are still reading that book from before.”
You laughed, a quick huff through your nose, and closed the book in your lap. You glanced up at him with a forced smile. “Trying and failing, sir.”
His eyes swept over your face. Gaunt was the first word to come to mind. You appeared gauntly and ragged. Bags were carved under your eyes, and your skin had lost its glow. He pushed on, trying not to dwell and stare at your new appearance. “And what has your mind occupied this time?”
The other night. The nightmares. An unpleasant past. You.
“I suppose a lot of things,” you answered with a heavy sigh.
Morpheus frowned slightly. Yet, he quickly wiped it away, replacing it with a small endearing smile. He extended his hand down towards you. “I know a place to help clear your mind, would you care to join me?”
Your eyes flickered up. His dazzling blue eyes - contrasted against the golden dazzling air - only showed kindness and a hint of concern. You should refuse, you should stay or perhaps return to your room for the night, but … but how could you say no? Not when he looked at you in such an alluring way, and not since he piqued your deep rooted curiosity. You carefully set the book aside on the plush cushions, and placed your hand in his. “I would love to.”
Morpheus’s smile grew as he drew you up to your feet. “Wonderful.”
He hooked your arm through his and guided you forward. Together, you walked out through the back entrance of the sun room, heading directly for the rose maze. The sun had dipped below the horizon, however its last bits of rays faintly colored the sky. Oranges and pinks still stained the vast canvas known as the sky. They desperately clung behind as rich purples, dark blues, and an all consuming black began to drip down coating all corners. The moon, perfectly sliced in half, already shone in the dimming sky. Its companions, stars, began to twinkle and fill the empty space for the moon was never alone. The rose maze, under this changing light, was mysterious. The greens almost appeared black, while the reds were embers of a dying fire. Excitement buzzed across your skin. Your heart flipped, nearly dropping into your stomach. It was all so thrilling to finally set food inside, and to be by Morpheus’s side as your guide.
Even if you shouldn’t, even if a logical part scolded you.
Morpheus drew you close as you approach the entrance of the maze. “Now, stay close. At night, it can be tricky to navigate.”
There was a hint of humor in his voice as if he was trying to spook you. You chuckled, shaking your head, “Really? Is that your plan? To take me in and do what you want without anyone seeing?”
He laughed, a deep rich laugh that vibrated in your own chest. “You have me figured out.”
You smiled, a true genuine smile. It returned as if it never truly left. It was nice to be joking and laughing with him. It was surprisingly so easy, like two friends and nothing else.
No titles, no past.
Stepping into the maze was stepping into another world. The maze hedges were easily seven feet tall and two or three feet wide, it fully blocked out the world the further you walked in. The hedges were cut and trimmed to perfection. No branch stuck out, only roses. And the roses? Gorgeous with no flaws. There were full roses with their petals spread out to greet you, there were buds still closed waiting for their time, and there were roses in every stage of blooming covering almost every inch of the hedges. The sweet floral aroma tickled your nose and filled the air.
You hummed, pleased by the scent.
Morpheus peered over at you, taken by your wide curious eyes. Your eyes darted all around, fascinated by it all, memorized by its beauty. Strolling further in, he followed the correct path leading to the center of the maze. His stride did not hesitate, but only slowed when your eyes longingly lingered back on all the passing flowers.
Best of all, and to your surprise, there weren't only red roses.
No, the deeper you walked the red stayed, yet yellows, pinks, and whites were slowly incorporated into the mix. A beautiful blend, and various shades, of warm inviting colors. It was like a storybook, a scenery plucked from a far off prosperous kingdom. Tempted by their beauty, you reached out, running your fingers along the soft petals. It was fine silk, or like a cloud.
“Careful -“
You hissed, stopping in place. A thorn had pricked your thumb.
Morpheus instantly frowned and moved in front of you. He carefully took your hand, examining your thumb. It was nothing to be concerned about. An insignificant prick, no worse than a paper cut. A small dot of blood began to well up. The dot sparkled like a certain ruby pinned to his tie. Before he could stop himself, Morpheus brought your thumb up to his lips. His lips - soft and gentle - pressed into the pad of your thumb kissing it.
Your heart flipped in your chest.
Morpheus’s eyes glanced up, locking with yours. A look flashed across his eyes, a look which could only be described as hunger. He nearly knocked the wind out of your lungs by such a simple look. He pulled away and dropped your hand. Turning his back to you, he mumbled, “Apologies for my behavior.”
He licked his lips, tasting the tiniest bit of your blood. He had to suppress a groan. It was truly addicting, like a newly discovered liquor he could happily get drunk off of each and every night.
“I have an older sister who used to do such a thing if any of us were injured. It’s a habit I unknowingly picked up,” he explained.
No, not explained but excused. It wasn’t necessarily a lie. However, it was a lie he told himself and you, rather than admit the aroma of your blood tempted him to act.
“It’s okay,” you muttered, feeling your heart skip in a way you had never felt before. “I should have known better.”
Morpheus wanted to say something, wanted to do something. He wanted to draw you close, he wanted to wrap his arms around your waist, he wanted to nuzzle his face into your neck, he wanted to hear you say his name over and over, he wanted to -
“Please,” he cleared his throat, “I would refrain from running your fingers over them. The thorns are quite sharp, and we needn’t any more accidents. Come, the center is up ahead.”
He walked - no, marched - ahead, and did not bother looking back to see if you were following.
Your lips thinned in thought. You silently followed him as this bizarre tension hovered in the shared space. The only sounds were the crunching of both of your shoes against the pebbled path. You eyed Morpheus’s back curiously and with some trepidation. He had once again pulled away from you. He showed you such kindness, yet almost scared by something he backed off. Why? What frightened him? What thoughts floated around in that head of his?
Why do you care, a voice called out.
You tensed a little. Why did you? It was so pointless and idiotic, especially when -
“We’re here,” Morpheus said. He rounded a corner and disappeared from sight.
Skirting around the hedge, you let out a small gasp. The pebbled path opened up. The space was carved into a perfect circle, with patches of lush full grass that tempted any tired feet to rest. One could lay and gaze up at the stars, or have a picnic in the high sun. However, most would turn to the concrete benches that surrounded the showstopper: a fountain at the very center. The fountain - smaller than the one in front of the house, yet had four tiers compared to the three - had dozens upon dozens of rose petals floating across the surface. Peering up, the moon looked back down at you in this secret oasis smiling. Its light rippled in the water, scattering its reflection. With the various colors from the roses, and the moonlight’s, it glittered here like a treasure trove.
It was breathtaking.
Morpheus glanced over his shoulder back to you. His heart lurched forward. You looked so beautiful under the moonlight. You slowly approached the foundation, dipping your fingers into the cool water. You picked up a petal, admiring it before setting it back into the water. A smile never left your lips. Any issues, any problems from before, were gone. Each of you solely existed in this moment. Morpheus felt his heart being drawn to you, bound to you. Anything you wanted, anything to keep you smiling, he would do.
What a frightening and thrilling feeling, so familiar yet so foreign to him.
You moved and sat down on the bench, watching as the water spilled over the tiered edges and as petals spun and danced on top of the water. The sounds of the water splashing, and trickling, was hypnotic and soothing. You sighed dreamily and murmured to yourself, “What a beautiful place.”
“It is.” You turned your head, looking up at Morpheus. His eyes were directly on you as he spoke, you always seemed to get his full attention. He smiled softly. He produced a rose from behind his back - a pure white rose that glittered like snow under the moonlight. He sat beside you on the bench, “May I?”
“Yes.”
He leaned forward, tucking the roses behind your ear. As he drew back, his nimble fingers skimmed along your jaw. His eyes softened. You truly were a fresh change in his life, a well needed change. You had taken his heart in the short time you worked here with your humor, your wit, your curiosity, and your kindness. He was smitten for deep in his heart he was a hopeless romantic.
He turned away from you, looking to the fountain. Your heart skipped. His touch burned across your skin. You reached up, touching the soft pure white petals. A smile crossed your lips as you stared at the multifaceted lord.
“I suppose I have to admit I do have an ulterior motive for asking you to join me,” he began.
“Oh?” You titled your head. “And what would that be?”
To see you smile again, he thought.
“I have a question to ask, a request, and I did not want anyone else to listen in.”
You leaned forward, silently waiting.
He bowed his head, and dare you say appeared to be almost shy. It surprised you to see him in such a way. He peered up at you with a cluster of unreadable emotions on his face. “I would like to ask if you would join me to attend my dear friend’s party.”
“What?” You breathed out.
“I want you to accompany me to Hob’s party, if you so wish to join me.”
“I … I am unsure. I am just taken back by your offer.”
“Do you truly find it so surprising?”
“Given my employment to you, I suppose I do,” you joked lightly.
“If you wish, think of it as a bonus for your wonderous upkeep of the manor.” He searched in your eyes hoping to find his answer. “So? Do you accept?”
You smiled softly, “How could I pass up such generosity? Yes.”
Lucienne was right. Morpheus knew exactly what to do.
Shortly after his surprising offer, Morpheus explained he will take care of anything. He will find a dress for you for the night, and pay all expenses - you reluctantly agreed after much arguing.
Soon, arm in arm again, he guided you out of the maze, and towards your room for the night. He paused in front of you, hovering slightly as if something weighed on him, as if he wished to say something else. His lips parted, but he just bowed his head. “Goodnight, I hope you have sweeter dreams tonight.”
“Thank you,” you bowed your head.
Say something, do something.
Instead, you just simply smiled. “Goodnight, sir.”
You twisted around to go into your room when a hand latched around your wrist. You suppressed a shiver at his cool hand. You peered over your shoulder looking down at the hand then slowly your eyes trailed up to see Morpheus’s wondrous blue eyes.
“Please,” he whispered softly, “when it is just us, call me Morpheus. No need for such formalities.”
Your heart fluttered, like a hummingbird. “Of course. Morpheus. Goodnight.”
His eyes twinkled, utterly overjoyed. A smile spread over his lips. He gently let go of your wrist and stood back with perfect posture. He bowed his head again, “Goodnight, (Y/N).”
You turned, finally stepping into your room. You gently shut the door as a giddy feeling washed over you. Morpheus’s footsteps soon faded away. You sighed, dreamily. Taking the rose from behind your ear, you floated over to the nightstand by your bed. You gently laid it down. Your fingers traced over the petals, unable to stop smiling. Maybe later you will get a cup and water for it. Your eyes, however, soon caught a folded piece of paper on the stand. Your smile faltered. Picking it up and unfolding it, your mother and father smiled back up at you. You folded the picture again. You tucked it under the beautiful white rose.
Just a little longer, you thought. I promise.
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Hype Boy | I.N x Reader
-> Pairing: Yang Jeongin x F1 Racer!Reader
-> Request: from @mirlisfreespace
-> Synopsis: Jeongin makes the best hype boy for his girlfriend. Part 02 to I Promise You
-> Warnings: Self-doubt. Anxiety. Negative thinking.
-> Word Count: 390
-> Requests: Open.
Stray Kids Masterlist | Tag List Sign-Up | Requesting Guidelines
©️ 2024 dancinglikebutterflywings - do not copy/modify/repost anywhere. reblog instead.
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Likes, comments & reblogs are welcomed and appreciated, thank you. 
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Jeongin spent nearly five minutes searching for his girlfriend when he finds her in one of the side rooms designated for when someone needs to take a break. Her knee is bouncing anxiously, as she bites her lip, and looking as if she's mentally a million miles away. 
"I've been looking for you," Jeongin says, letting her know that it's just him. "Is everything okay?" 
"I don’t know why I’m even doing this," she replies, avoiding eye contact by looking down at the floor. "I'm not even that good. There are so many other racers that are better than me, faster than me, and more experienced than I am. What am I doing here? I don't deserve to be here." 
"I think your full of shit," he tells her sitting next to her. She glares at him, her eyes glossing over. "You deserve to be here.” he continues, taking her hand in his and making her look at him with his free hand. “You've worked your ass off to get where you are today, and I couldn't be prouder of you. Don't let anyone make you feel or think otherwise."  
"You know how competitive Formula One can get," she sighs.  
"Which is testament to how hard you've worked to get here. It's proof that you deserve to be here just as much, if not more, than the others," he counters. "Now, stop doubting yourself, get in that car, and show them what you're made of. Show them why you deserve to be here." 
"What would I do without you?" she asks a faint smile on her lips as she looks at him loving. 
"You don't have to worry about that because I'll always be here, supporting you and reminding you of your worth," he smiled, pressing a kiss to her hand. 
"I love you," she says pressing a kiss to his lips. 
"I love you too," he says and stands up, her hand still in his, and leads her out of the room so she can prepare for her race. 
As they walk back towards the main area, Jeongin can't help but feel a surge of pride for his girlfriend. He’s witnessed her dedication and passion for racing firsthand, and he knows that she has what it takes to succeed even further in the competitive world of Formula One racing. 
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TAGGING: @staytiny2000 - @dancelikebutterflywings-library - @kpopmenace143 - @treehouse-mouse - @alexxavicry
@rainydayteacups - @tinyelfperson - @laylasbunbunny - @skz1-4-3 - @pinkies-things
@kayleefriedchicken - @everythingboutkpop
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Why I Love Crosshair- A Story About Persevering
I talk about Crosshair so much on my blog. With TBB ending in a few days, I wanted to share with y'all why he resonates with me so deeply. This show and these characters have touched the hearts of so many in this fandom. I'm curious, which Batcher has resonated with you? Anyways, here we go!
Crosshair's hot. That's it. I'm a simple woman. Moving on.
He's really freaking cool- I'm not gonna like, seeing Crosshair make those trick shots has me on the edge of my seat. It's just so much fun to watch someone do an incredible skill whether it's dance, playing music, or in Crosshair's case, take out several battle droids with one shot. I love it.
His character arc- Crosshair is one of the most interesting and complex characters I've met in recent years. I'm not going to lie, it's refreshing to see a really well-written morally grey character. Crosshair's one and only loyalty is to his family (plus a few others). He will do anything for them. However, Crosshair isn't drawn to some bigger cause like Echo or Omega are. From my POV, it's something interesting to think about. What makes a good person? How far is one willing to go for someone they love? At what point does that loyalty and love turn selfish or self-destructive? These are all questions that Crosshair's character brings up.
I also appreciate the love and passion put into his character. Jennifer and the team took their time to give Cross a proper redemption. It wasn't as simple as "Crosshair just flips on a dime" or "he dies proving he still loved them." No. The change had to come from Crosshair. Crosshair had to be the one to make the steps towards coming home. It had to be his choice and his choice alone, not something that was forced onto him. I really appreciate that tbh. People are so complex and we all make mistakes. Crosshair made some pretty bad choices (not that he was 100% in control). Still, he had to figure things out for himself and when he was ready, he decided to come home.
His story- Crosshair's story is one of struggle and persevering in my eyes. "The Outpost" is one of the best depictions of what it's like to struggle with mental health. It's why I love it so much. I see a lot of myself in Crosshair. So often, it's much easier to just lie down and quit. But Crosshair doesn't quit. No. He fights. He fights so hard and in the end, he makes it. To see Crosshair come home after so long meant the world to me. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. You can and will make it. And he didn't do it alone. Omega continued to be a light in his life. Crosshair reminds me to never give up. Even when it all seems impossible, we need to keep going and there is hope for the future. When he meditates with Omega, I almost cried. That episode reminded me of my mom because she's constantly encouraging me and supporting me. She always tells me that I have to be the one to help myself. It's difficult and she will be there, but I can't just expect things to fix themselves. Similarly, Omega told Crosshair that he needed to help himself. I don't think I've ever related to a SW character as much as I have with Crosshair.
Crosshair has taught me so much about myself. Through him, I've learned that there's a lot going on in my head that I need to work on. I realized why S1 Hunter pissed me off so much. Because like Cross, there are times at home where I feel like no one listens. He taught me to keep going, to keep fighting, especially in times of great uncertainty. Crosshair and Omega's relationship shows just how special the impact of one person can have. I see their relationship reflected in my life in many ways. There's so much more I can say about Cross, but we would be here forever lol.
I am so grateful for Crosshair. I am so grateful for his story. He might be just a character, but he's really helped me tackle some rough times in my life. I love him with all my heart and will forever be thankful to TBB team for bringing his story to life.
Thank you DBB, Jen, Brad, Michelle, and everyone on TBB team. Thank you for everything ❤️
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captainkurosolaire · 1 year
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I’m always impressed by the quality of your writing and the sheer creativity that you put into everything you do. If I could be one tenth as talented I should count myself blessed indeed. Plus you are kind and supportive towards others in a manner which does you great credit.
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ANONYMOUSLY TELL ME YOUR HONEST OPINION ABOUT ME. I CAN’T REPLY, JUST PUBLISH.
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nyxofdemons · 7 months
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this was going to be like a mile long essay but i just realized the most concise way to say it is that "it feels like a retcon that blitz has been so resentful and hostile towards fizz all this time since he was supposed to feel guilty" is simply not a good criticism when we have been shown, time and time again, that blitz's number one defense mechanism when he feels guilty or judged or attacked is to lash out, to deflect and ignore all his responsibility, and to shift the blame to someone else. that's like. his defining character flaw
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thelostgirl21 · 4 months
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Ever since realising that Joey referring to Jaskier as sapiosexually connecting with Radovid was likely 100% intentional, I've literally been losing my shit over the potential implications...
Like... new headcanon!
What if Jaskier has always approached the act of having sex with someone else as a form of performance art, driven by his desire to please his "audience", and making other people passionately respond to what he's doing for them?
Like... what if what normally sexually interests him isn't so much inspired by the other person, but more by the general idea of being wanted, needed, and the anticipation of the positive feedback he might get from sexually interacting with them.
He readily experiences primary aesthetic attraction towards other people, finds them interesting, becomes curious about them, and feels instantly affectionate towards them; but he's not sexually aroused by / attracted to them, per say.
He really wants to make them feel good, and bask in that sense of intimacy, togetherness and praises he receives from being sexually involved with them (yeah, because he's that good at figuring out what pleases them, and offering it to them).
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And somehow, audience response/participation tends to really inform how good or "smooth" he is when it comes to his ability to seduce someone, and convince them to become sexually intimate with him in the first place?
For example...
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So... what if Jaskier is a bard and an artist through and through? Not just on stage, but in the sheets as well?
Turning sex into poetry and something very deliberate, where it's all about a sense of artistic expression, and a pure melody of various physical sensations and emotions!
Sexually? Jaskier is an artist, a creative, a free thinker... All is fair!
But it's not something that he usually feels any urge or need to engage in based on the way someone else inspires him any sudden desire to have sex with them specifically.
He loves his sexual partners, he's intrigued by them, he wants to connect with them - even if that connection lasts but a night - and sex allows him to do that.
But maybe he has no idea that sex might be experienced differently by others.
Maybe he just thinks they're like really really REALLY expressive and appreciative of the sex itself, or something, whenever he notices how hungrily some of them appear to throw themselves at him, or at each other.
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Also, I've somehow always found it a bit weird how Jaskier seems to fully remain clear minded during Yennefer's magical orgy.
Yennefer comments on how Geralt seems to be immune to her spell, as if it's some kind of big deal!
But then, there's Jaskier...
He just waves at them as if he's totally unaffected by everyone else fucking each other around him, and being surrounded by a bunch of naked bodies having sex...
And/or looks like he's not quite comfortable with the way someone's hand is moving closer to his crotch at some point...
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Grant it, he's slowly being suffocated to death by a Djinn's magic, and likely has other priorities than sex in mind!
But that's just the thing...
Isn't Yennefer's spell supposed to override people's ability to think rationally or fully understand what's happening? Everyone snaps out of it looking confused, and poor Jaskier just basically passes out, but he's never once looked like he stopped looking at what was happening around him from an outsider's P.O.V.
Whenever the camera cuts to him, he seems to be sharing the same reality as Geralt and Yennefer, not the kind of sexual haze everyone else appears to be happily trapped in.
Would being affected by the Djinn just make him immune to the whole "sex weed magic thingy" as well?
Or would the usual lack of primary sexual attraction towards other people make it a bit harder for Yennefer's spell to take a hold on him?
(Another headcanon theory I came up with - should Jaskier be revealed as being the direct descendant of Fjall and the Lark - would be that, perhaps, the small touch of magic in his blood would be enough to make him more resistant to certain types of spell... On top of being able to eat whatever he comes across without freaking poisoning himself, I swear!)
But yeah, let's just imagine, for a moment, that sapiosexual Jaskier would have no clue (or very little clue) of what it actually feels like to specifically be sexually attracted to someone (rather than the sex itself, and all it may represent to him) in a way where you are viscerally craving that sexual contact with that specific someone, and you feel like you might go crazy if they don't finally have sex with you.
Then, along comes Radovid, that he develops a sapioromantic and sapiosexual attraction for...
And, for a while, Jaskier thinks he's just losing his freaking mind, because there are moments where Radovid is just there, simply being all sensitive and insightful while discussing dwarven politics with Yarpen, for example...
... and poor Jaskier's never been so sexually aroused in his life!!!
But Radovid is not even technically doing anything that's supposed to be "sexually charged"!
He's fully clothed, being all smart and sensitive, talking about a topic of interest to him while having lunch by the side of the road...
...and Jaskier is just there, casually eating next to him while listening to him talk with their friends.
It's 100% casual and totally trivial, day to day stuff... No plan for Jaskier to try and seduce him and have sex there!
So, how come does he suddenly feel the urge to pounce on him and beg Radovid to just take him right here and there, in front of all their friends at camp, and it's taking all the self-control he can humanly muster not to act upon that impulse?!
Instead, Jaskier stands up, awkwardly excuses himself, and decides the best way to manage the situation is to go take a random dip fully clothed in the nearest river.
"Why?", they ask. Because he was getting hot, that's why!
And no, he couldn't just remove his clothes instead! He liked them really baggy an concealing that day, thank you very much!
As a matter of fact, he might decide to just start wearing his shirt over his pants from now on, because he's starting a new fashion trend! No other reason!
Oh...
Oh, no...
NO.
Don't you dare look at me all concerned while trying to read into my behavior, you stupid prince... Wait. Is that a smirk?
You're smirking aren't you?
How do you look like you've figured it out, when I've no fucking clue what's even going on with me?!
Great! And now the river's cool water is not even working anymore!
That's it! I'm never walking out of here again, and I hope you know it's all your fault!
No. No, don't take off your shirt and get into the water with me, that's not...
Oh? Oh! Everyone else is going and leaving us alone? Okay, nevermind! Fuck! Why's it so hard to walk while standing waist deep in water? Surely there must be a way to get to you faster...
And I'm just imagining poor Jaskier trying to ask Yennefer if Radovid might be some kind of sorcerer with latent magical abilities or something... Because, whenever he's around, there are moments where he randomly feels this overwhelming urge to make love to him, even if the context is not appropriate for delivering a sexual performance of any kind!
Like yes, it has happened to him before to have "the muses" whisper in his ear that sex with a certain someone might be good, and he's typically very open to sudden bursts of inspiration and unplanned sexual improvisation!
But that's not the same thing!
It only happens specifically with Radovid - especially when he's saying or doing something really witty, sensitive or insightful - and it's like his whole body suddenly catches fire, gets all tense and trembling with need; and being touched by him and having sex with him feels like finally being able to breathe after someone's forcefully been holding your head under water for a while...
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Radovid must be bewitching him, somehow, for sure!
And Yenn is like "You know that what you've just been describing is simply what regular sexual desire feels like for most people, right?"
And Jaskier's just going:
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aro-culture-is · 1 year
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Aro culture is being pissed off when you are on a colleges website completing their "fun" little quiz that reccommends what majors you should look into and HALF of the questions are about romance or dates and you are just sitting there wondering how on earth this even slightly relates to what you want to study
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#Anonymous#aro culture is#aro#aromantic#actually aro#actually aromantic#ask#mod phoenix#literally none of that FUCKING matters!!!!#and i'm willing to goddamn bet that 'less' romantic/feelings stuff#gets thrown towards STEM#and like. bro. i will unhinge my fucking jaw and bite your fucking head off#i am in STEM *because* i am passionate and feel shit intensely#like!!!! look. i took a class on fucking fluid dynamics (among other things) and thought it was *fun*#i wasn't perfect at it but i was so *fascinated* by how much of it we don't know#and how extremely interesting and simple those cases can be#like!!! we don't know what the speed of a liquid is at a 90 degree corner in a pipe#as in like. in that exact corner#and there is straight up a $1mil prize for anyone who can figure out how to solve for that#it's such a simple everyday type of thing!!!!#and we don't know and it's so cool and the equation for every single other spot in that pipe is honestly very well understood!#but just not that *one* area!#and like. bro i just think the world is an absolute magnificent dance of improbable odds and i can't understand#when others think that the mundane is not art and beauty too#engineering gets such a rep as the uncreative nerds#but like... look. we're looking back at the history of our field to draw inspiration as reference#i don't understand how people can say that they'd hate to look at engineering references all day when they do art -#did they not study and practice and see the beauty and detail in it?#(ofc if numbers get fucked in your brain from things like dyscalcula or dyslexia that's not the same -#i personally can't use digital references for art without being very careful or i'll get a migraine)
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gncrezan · 6 months
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I love your unhealthy clingy famous MC you don't understand how feral I'm over him
THANK YOU I LOVE HIM SO DEARLY TOO!!!!! the backstory with absent parents and just. everything about seven... i think makes a lot of infamous ocs potentially lean into this?? or at least there are a ton of choices that just made me go "oh yeah. that's him" . idk there is an element to how infamous is written that really helps with characterising him, including how customisable it is, and i do love that about this IF!!!!! crying about him below the cut <3
aki kind of navigates the world worried his loved ones will leave him and is a little too clingy because of it. he also has been playing those worries off by being charming, flirty and funny. like he can somehow project this hyper-extrovered version of himself and try to make people love that !!! he drops that more around his bandmates/friends, but not in front of people he's just met (please guess who accidentally escalated the bed fight on the tour bus)
aki also hooks up with people a lot, just cause he likes sex but also because he enjoys the no-strings-attached. because of those attachment issues, when he gets something that feels black and white to him, something one-and-done and he leaves in the morning, he can just. take feelings out the equation. he knows its not meant to last so he can just walk out (leave! hit da bricks!!! walk out!!!!!)
committing to a romantic relationship . you can imagine. is a little complicated due to all this LMFAO he just overthinks and worries before even getting into it, regardless of if it's reciprocated or not. between the one time he's actually into someone (seven) and how that ended (...badly) + the fact that deliriously avoiding commiting to anything except hookups = very little (none at all) actual dating experience. aki has no idea to deal with it and will balk. yeah this is immature of him but i have plans to make this guy character develop so hard throughout the course of infamous that he may implode
i love the genre of character where they're just going "i know i have a few issues, who doesn't, but honestly i think i'm well adjusted!!" <- they are not well adjusted. in fact they're worse than they think
also no one asked for the orionmance essay i sent my friend but here it is <3
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#the seven not-a-breakup can actually completely hinder your mc too <3#aki just internalises it. OF COURSE not blaming seven for feeling abandoned and then leaving. literally they get voted out#regardless of if the pc votes for or against. but aki never expected seven to walk out of his life and it adds to his issues#i am very much leaning towards the valenreign poly and orion because of the aforementioned tho#vic and him have so much like. common ground in that projection and performance . g's drive and passion is i think the same#also g /picking/ him. vic enjoying his music. that means everything to him. to be seen for what he values in himself#very fun and very chaotic but they fall into place . i dont think aki would have expected it but he wouldn't change it#orion i think nudges him constantly into being a more. true version of himself. like just more genuine#also has something about him that makes aki just. blurt out the truth of how he feels. LOL.#akihiro yasumi#so so sorry for the essay anon. this ask was the equivalent of a free pass to talk forever to me#on that note. big fat mouth arlie is in his playlist. 'that comment wasn't funny/just wanted you to love me' dear god.#also oc aki that exists outside (and existed before) infamous is so much less. like This#him in infamous is a lot of his personality dialed up to 11 bc of the circumstances he's in (almost-famous lead singer)#and also a result of the pre-written backstory and how he'd react to that#he's literally just a hairdresser. his best friend is a office worker. they are each others wingmen. they will die embarassing each other#he also has siblings but infamous kind of drags him out of a doting older brother figure and directly into#.... well. the pc's parents. sorry aki#answered#anon
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jacksprostate · 1 month
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sorry this is once again my monthly 'i'm in love with people and our capacity for compassion even in the face of deep deep cruelty, even though i've seen worse and worse things, come to terms with so much, it's my love of humanity that has let me avoid rotting, encouraged me to grow and chase my own place in helping everyone around me" post
#im really excited for the job im starting. still about a month or so out but heading towards a career change sort of that im really excited#for. im just... i actually used to be very cynical and i struggled to see the point through all the terrible things in the world#but for many reasons#even as i discovered worse and worse things#ive developed... resiliency i never thought id have#born out of this appreciation for those and the world around me#and i wish i could share it. i see so many people in my old shoes#im still growing. so much to do#but im at a level of contentment.. idk. i couldntve dreamed of#and it took effort#it is not /easy/ to face things and believe in good regardless#but. its rewarding. i wish it for all of you#on a similar but different note ive been reaching a point of being more myself in social situations rather than just a chameleon#and ive been lucky enough to have the people around me the past two years or so be very supportive in a way that has truly let me grow and#become a better version of myself#and its sort of been this positive feedback loop. because the more confident and passionate you are the more people are delighted by your#eccentricies#i used to be so beat down#i still struggle so much#but. im at a place i never thought id be#no doubt there will be struggles in the future#hell its not like things are perfect now#still so much. major things to improve on#but idk. i am happy#and its a very full sense of happiness.#full and aware and strong#thats what i wish for all of you :)
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darkwood-sleddog · 2 years
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building on the last part of the tags from my previous post like. irresponsible breeders that put no thought towards the temperament of the puppies they produce has LASTING effects.
Not just on the breed/dogs in general, but in peoples perceptions of breeds and how they should act and should be.
For some breeds this wariness of people is desirable and acceptable (many guardian breeds for example), but in the Malamute and in sled dog breeds this is not appropriate. Sled dogs need to be able to be examined by a veterinarian, race volunteers, and their musher with ease. They need to be handled and friendly towards strange people. There is no world in which temperamental 'unpredictability' is a positive in a sled dog breed. Just as the dog needs to be able to rely on the musher to advocate for them and their needs on the trail, the musher also relies on a dog's ability to act and behave in a predictable manner.
which is why it is SO frustrating to see the public's perception of the Alaskan Malamute be one of poor temperament. Yes these dogs are unbiddable and can be mouthy during play and overstimulation. Yes they are primitive. But that does't mean they should be showing any aggression towards people. Poor temperament happens when breeders pair dogs just to have puppies to sell. Poor temperament happens when breeders pair dogs just because both dogs are conformationally correct. Poor temperament happens when people don't experience these dogs around other dogs, people and social situations and breed anyways. Poor temperament happens when people don't work their dogs in harness and/or are far removed from the work these dogs are meant to do and don't actually understand from their own experiences why the dog's temperament and predictability of such is desirable.
And additionally poor perception of many working breeds comes from the fact that many dogs of working breeds are under-stimulated and have no business being in a casual home environment. My dogs make good pets because 1.) their breeder has worked for 30 years on breeding people friendly, predictable temperaments and 2.) because I give them what they need on a daily basis to be fulfilled. It is really that simple.
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katyspersonal · 2 months
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I really hate it when someone says or does something mean and unfair and I try to address how wrong it is, and all they can react as "hey this is just internet and we are also strangers move on why are you getting so worked up about words in the iNtErNeT fRoM sTrAnGeR grow up pls I can be a mean unfair bitch for no reason to StRaNgErS on the InTeRnEt 🥺🥺🥺"
Like, the fact that we are not sharing physical space doesn't cancel the fact that what you just did not only didn't make rational sense, but was mean? And you are not supposed to be a rude bitch to "strangers" either? How are you a mature, secure adult if the only way you can handle the fact of misjudging someone and being rude is to try to gaslight them with that "you're overreacting uwu" thing? I am reacting just right, by pointing out an unfair action for being unfair, I am physically unable to react more rationally.
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citrinide · 4 months
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Saying this in the nicest way possible.
Some people really need to shut up.
#cecil.fm#DESPERATELY begging some of you to stop ignoring huge parts of a character JUST because you like them#He's an asshole. He's CONSISTENTLY an asshole. He makes slights and unnecessary judgements toward EVERYONE. PLEASE IT'S NOT JUST THE CHASSIS#yes this is about Wheatley obviously I'm going to be pissed over people misinterpreting characters from my special interest AGAIN#I was there when people UwU-ified him and treated him like a precious baby while demonising GLaDOS at the same time I'm bashing heads in rn#they're. fucking. FOILS!!!#THEY'RE BOTH BAD PEOPLE OH MY GOD THEY BOTH MAKE UNNECESSARILY RUDE REMARKS YOU NEED TO ACCEPT THIS OH MY GOD#I am begging oh my fucking god#there's moments where I see this behaviour and like desperately want to block people because oh my god what ELSE are you blatantly ignoring#like I'm not innocent either here I'll be the FIRST to admit my f/o is a shitty person too! He's a pathetic little suck up#he's annoying and so fucking rude but I'm not ignoring any of that!#The portal fandom has such an issue with this I swear to god. nothings changed we're going in circles. character analysis is dead.#I think thats what made me cancel LaaC originally too. fuck.#this is why I stay in my little Aperture Tag corner. Because at LEAST we aren't operating under the false pretense that Nigel is some saint#forcing you all (non-specific) to play the game again and TRY to explain away the blatant instances of him being all types of awful#just a general sentiment I've seen again recently that I REALLY despise. stop declawing characters im going to MAUL you#anyway sorry for the tag rant im just very passionate about this game and people misinterpreting characters WILDLY off is. Yeah :))#extra note: blaming the chassis for his actions as if he wasn't predisposed to that behaviour is a stupid ass take and always has been <3#i could go on for hours but I'd hit the note limit so <3#one of my biggest pet peeves in fandom honestly.
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youcanthandelthetruth · 6 months
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LOOT from fiber festival
And my first try at spinning!
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characteroulette · 5 months
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for a thing, do you have any pokemon team ideas for the RGB puzzlers? I may be doing something
Ooohh!!! I love creating Pokemon teams!! Hold up I'm about to go full nerd mode --
Okay so I crafted one for Luke on a whim since he's so connected with animals all ready. We got
Toppy the Rattata,
Theo the Teddiursa,
a Ducklett,
a Chatot,
a Slurpuff,
and a Carbink! (Though Bunnelby, Buneary, or either Nidoran would also work)
(As a bonus, Layton's team includes an Unown, a Sigilyph, and a Galarian Weezing. Phoenix has a Talonflame, a Masquerain, a Sigilyph, and either a Dragonite or a Salamance. Just some sort of Dragon.) (Bonus bonus, Claire has a Chingling/Chimecho on her team.)
Apollo team is a lot harder a think for me. I am coming up with this on the fly okay here we go
Hisuian Arcanine,
a Litleo,
a Larvesta (or maybe even a Slither Wing?),
a Basculin (evolves into Basculegion, of course),
a Goomy (also Hisuian form),
and then maybe a Cacnea. Because prickly jokes.
And then Snufkin team can go one of several ways!! Either he has no traditional team (but there is a Celebi always following him around...), he has an entirely Fish team (Arrokuda, Veluza, Finneon, Bruxish, Magikarp, Barboach), OR he has the team I built for him in ScarVio
a Dragonite (his Moominite, if you will),
a Smoliv,
a Finneon (/Basculin; would tie him to Apollo more),
a Dedenne,
a Klefki,
and either a Larvitar or Bramblin, I can't decide. (Sudowoodo also good.)
Hopefully my theming comes through on Snufkin and Apollo's teams lol thanks for asking this!!!
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weenhands · 8 months
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i was right about september and how i am inbetween changes and endings and beginnings and those beginnings are finally starting to pop up and the endings are starting to finally come to a close ...... ...Whatever continues to chug my mountain dew
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#Like with my fashion taste for example#me becoming fixated on that stuff just randomly fell into my lap it wasnt planned#i just one day decided to go ham in one store because it was my birthday and i decided#its time i start actually investing in my dream wardrobe#and this is a beginning!!! but its also an end!!!!! because alot of how i want to dress is polar opposite to the other style i sorta ..stuc#too which was more fem and cutsey ig..... my style now has more of an alternative influence and some goth influence too and its opposite of#how i thought i Should dress because it was predictable for me. i lean towards cute stuff so just. dress cutely???#but when i was very young i wanted to dress like this#this was like. Peak fashion peak style for me#and altho i still decided to dress the other way#im finally incorporating my dream wardrobe and it feels seemless and without missing my old one/aesthetic because i feel like this is so#ingrained in my wishes of how i want to present to the world and stuff#idk. i dressed the way i thought i came across and even if this is a major 180 for me it still feels so right. its Not something im used t#but it feels right#i think thats why im very passionate about this lately#cuz its a major change in who i am and who i always was deep down#and Othwr chages. other ones too that im realizing about my happiness throughout my day to day in general#its harder to explain but. im learning on how to be more present in the moment#stop prioritizing my life looking a certain way#stop fearing my life isnt being lived the right way#....idk#just !!! lots of change!#i am not who i thought i was! i am meant to be more present than i had always thought!#there are technically also changes to tbis blog as well which iwill probably explain more indepth some other time...#like w me ...distancing myself from fandom and posting what i want to post about my life and aesthetics and fixations#not prioritizing this blog be so my chem oriented#idek if i consider this a mcr blog anymore cuz i made the decision awhile ago to let go of somwtbing im not entirely passionate about anymoe#and it feels good#i blog for. Me not anyone else
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