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#I SWEAR IF IT FLOPS THOUGH
iceunhie · 6 months
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writing is actually an out of body experience that physically drains you and I'm feeling that first hand writing this fic good lord 😭
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notsoevilmagistrate · 7 months
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Reading American Psycho and god, Patrick is so pathetic, somehow even more so than in the movie. He saw a lady on a bench sipping coffee and assumed her to be homeless(because he’s an ignorant FUCK and doesn’t pay attention to shit), and tosses a dollar into her FULL COFFEE CUP, causing the most awkward situation known to man.
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piripiip · 13 days
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カラフル
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I MADE A SIXTY DESIGN HSJAFHGAJSF
and im so happy with it
extra details I forgot to write/show/didn't have time to do:
he can be very erratic because his software got REALLY buggy from getting a bullet blasted through his head
because of having said buggy software, he often has days where he has trouble doing stuff because he has too many errors'n'shit
trust issues
also he tries way too hard to hide his bugged out gunshot wound skin (which, because of some kind of botched repair or lack there of, retracts and refuses to work there) because of insecurity, but when he's overwhelmed or asleep he doesn't have the energy to keep his skin from retracting so it retracts a whole lot more (will show it in individual screenshots for the close-ups)
also he hates the color blue. will explain if someone wants me to but in short, it's because of cyberlife and blood
he literally cannot express emotions correctly. sure, he looks like he's either angry or just dead the entire time, but that's just because that's the only thing he's learned how to express.
that's what the "emotionless" part means
theres a lot more i've imagined up for him but i can talk about it more later
ok. close ups that i really like
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listen. just. IM SO PROUD OF THE WAY I DREW THE SKIN AND HSI LED AND THE HAIR AND WHQBJHWAA
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More of an example on how Sixty's skin retracts normally without him having the energy/trying to reduce or hide it.
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Aaaand then just Sixty Death Stare TM and then me listening to music while drawing and being like "wouldn't it be so cool if I put a quote from this song in this because Sixty would agree with that statement"
Aaaaanyways enjoy this project that I only finished because my LA teacher from like last year also really likes DBH and lets me rant to her about DBH and also show her my cool art of DBH because she's a very cool LA teacher 10/10
Also yes I did make almost every dot on each i an LED, you can't stop me.
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gothmoneyswag · 1 year
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no show has the range and commitment to fuckery like gintama does. no other show could pull the shit that gintama does at the consistency that gintama does while simultaneously maintaining the high level of quality that gintama has. like its actually insane how in the world did they do that
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insertpinkchiphere · 7 months
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//trying to chip away at outfits i've been wanting to draw for a few days and smacking my head against my notepad because i keep blanking every time i settle down to draw.
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epicswagdivorceguy1 · 2 years
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little 3d whomper i made :3 he says hello!!!
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sirenwalker · 11 months
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i swear to god if roman is actually skating to nureyev and i get to see it live i will literally die on the spot. that will end me.
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mizugucci · 1 year
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i start my new job the 16th and as much as ive enjoyed being online this much, it isnt something i usually do lol. i will likely go back to lurking & posting like, 7 gifsets a month
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flashhwing · 1 year
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How are Fabian and Zev getting along? 👀 (was reading your posts about Fabian and saw they just met, also Fabian is very cute)
eeeeeeee thank you 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 in my head Fabian and Zev are besties (5’3 stabby elves with a fascination for the dalish) but so far in game that is not happening lmao. Fabian is interested in the whole Assassin thing and happy to have another elf in camp, but all his poking and prodding is rubbing Zevran the wrong way I think. also there’s very little trust here at the beginning. but what can you expect their very first meeting Fabian kicked him in the balls and Zev tried to kill him ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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deus-ex-mona · 2 years
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tfw you’re indecisive af
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gloomwitchwrites · 12 days
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You get drunk and don't remember giving them a hickey. So you get mad at them.
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Oh, anon! I love love love this prompt. Even though the prompt itself is fairly straightforward, there is some wiggle room about how this could play out. I stuck to the prompt but did my best to keep them on the shorter side.
Some of these get spicy but don't fall into graphic detail.
Task Force 141 x Female Reader
Content & Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): swearing, suggestive themes, arguing, sexual tension, kissing, alcohol
ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist
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John Price
“These reports are shit, Price. What am I supposed to do with them?”
You’re trying your best not to sound irritated, but your head is pounding. You agreed to go out for drinks but told yourself you wouldn’t have more than one or two. That went completely out the door when multiple people began paying for rounds. After the fourth, the night started to come blurry. Not all the pieces are there.
Of what you can recall from last night, you remember that you sat in a man’s lap. Well—sat isn’t the correct word. More like straddled. You remember strong arms, an accent, and an excitement in what you were doing. But the face is still foggy.
“What you always do,” replies Price. There’s a tease in his tone you don’t particularly like. It’s too friendly, and it stirs something fierce inside your belly.
Price shifts in his chair behind his desk, the collar of his jacket flops open slightly. You catch a hint of something dark on the side of Price’s neck. You frown, your rebuttal gone.
“What is that?” You nod toward his throat.
Price leans back. “What?” he asks. “This?” He reaches up, pulling back on the collar.
It’s a…oh fuck.
“You were happy to give it to me.” Price shrugs.
Fuck.
“Oh my god,” you whisper, tossing the manila file folder on Price’s desk.
The man you straddled last night was Price? The man who is always fucking up reports and ignoring all your suggestions for corrections? That one?
“You looked good doing it, too,” he continues, that teasing smile falling into a comfortability of a lover.
No. No no no.
You place your hands on your hips. “And you let me do that?”
Price shrugs. “We’re consenting adults.”
“I was drunk.”
Price crosses his arms over his chest. “We were both drunk. And you’re the one who pounced on me.”
Embarrassment rises hot and wild in your cheeks. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“You did,” he confirms, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly as he smirks. “Ambushed me actually.”
“Then why didn’t you stop me?” Your voice cracks, going a bit high.
“I tried.”
That’s almost worse. You jumped him and then sucked on his neck until it left a mark. What an absolute fucking mess.
You roll your eyes. “You tried? A big strong man like you couldn’t stop me?”
This time Price is the one rolling his eyes. He makes an irritated groan. Price pushes up from his chair, one hand waving out in front of him as he speaks. “You said you’d been thinking about me.”
It’s not entirely untrue. While you attend the clerical side of things, you do make excuses to come see Price. He’s older. Handsome. Assertive. His reports aren’t always shit but it’s the only reason you have to bother him.
“I didn’t mean it,” you reply but even you don’t believe it.
Price comes around the desk and steps into your space. “Really?”
You square your shoulders, staring into Price’s face. “Really.”
He shakes his head, clearly not believing you at all. “As I recall, you were in my lap. Practically begging.”
“And you allowed that? In front of everyone?” Even Price couldn’t be that careless.
This time, Price smiles like he knows something you don’t. “You don’t remember.”
“What?” you ask, flustered.
Price starts laughing, but it’s not mocking, more like he can’t believe what he’s hearing.
“John,” you snap.
Price sinks down into his chair, legs spread wide. “I think I liked it better when you said my name while seated in my lap.”
Your fingers dig into the top of Price’s desk. Pieces begin to return. Fragments of you squirming in his lap. Lips pressed against his.
“How did you say it?” he ponders, almost aloud rather than to you. Then, he smiles, not even answering his own question.
Price rests his palm on his thigh and your gaze drops to its subtle movement before returning to his face.
“Think I’d like a matching one,” he says. He runs his hand down his thigh and then back up. “Or I could give you one just like it.”
“John,” you murmur, not knowing what it is you want to say.
“Doesn’t have to be on your neck,” and his voice is nearly a growl. Price lightly squeezes his thigh and you know exactly where he’s referring to. “Be easier if you sit on the desk.”
You snatch up the folder on Price’s desk, clutching it like a shield against your chest. Price doesn’t even blink. Doesn’t appear fazed at all. Stomping over you shove it against his chest, intending to walk right out the door.
But Price is quick.
With one hand he’s clutching the file and with the other he grabs your wrist before you manage to move away.
“Remove your hand,” you say but there is no venom in it.
Price’s gaze lingers on your lips before shifting up to meet your eyes. “Come back when you know what you want.”
Price releases you, and you nearly stumble forward into his lap. Catching yourself on the edge of his desk, you spin on your heel, exiting Price’s office as the final fragments of memory fall into place.
You don’t want to admit it.
Not out loud. Not yet.
But you will be back.
Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
It’s unbelievable. Unfathomable.
You’re not angry with Kyle. You’re upset with yourself. You’re upset that you were so careless about how many drinks you had, and how you couldn’t control yourself in the moment. Kyle is not a liar, and he doesn’t take advantage, so whatever you did, is on you.
“I’m sorry,” you say, swallowing down some of the rising irritation. “It’s my fault.”
Kyle shrugs, a sheepish smile on his face. “Not like I pushed you away.”
“That doesn’t matter,” you insist, flinging your arms out in exasperation, nearly knocking over bottles of cleaner.
“Fucking hell,” he mutters, catching one of them before it hits the floor.
This little storage room isn’t big enough for this. You need space. You need to run far away from here and pretend like last night didn’t happen. Not that you can remember all of it. You don’t recall giving Kyle that mark on his neck.
“It does matter. We both had too much but I still had more of my head than you did.” Kyle places the bottle of cleaner back on the shelf. “I should’ve done better.”
“We’re coworkers, Kyle. And I had no right. We aren’t together.”
Kyle smirks and you want to smack it right off his face. “We could be,” he murmurs, taking a step forward.
“Absolutely not,” you retort but you don’t retreat.
Kyle’s smirk faulters a bit but he doesn’t shrink away. If anything, he looks more determined, like the rejection is a farce.
“You remember anything you said to me last night?”
You lick your lips and cross your arms defensively over your chest. “Even if I did, does it change anything?”
Kyle sighs and runs his hand over the top of his head. “It does for me.”
Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you consider your options. Kyle is a sweet man, at least to you. Everyone always comments on it to you when he isn’t around, and you’ve always dismissed their observations.
Maybe he does care, and you doing this tipped him over the edge into a place neither of you might be able to come back from.
“I need some fucking air,” you mutter, wanting to escape this situation, even for a bit.
Kyle shoves forward, blocking the door. Your lips move, forming the shapes of words, but Kyle shakes his head, all seriousness.
“We need to talk about this.”
“We don’t need to talk about anything,” you snap.
Kyle’s eyebrows rise toward his hairline and his head tips slightly to the side, revealing more of the mark. “Everyone knows what happened.”
“What?” you breathe.
“We weren’t alone when you straddled me.” You’re too stunned to speak. All the words you want to say are gone. Lost to the void that is your mind.
Kyle sighs and leans against the door. “Soap got a great view.”
“Stop talking. Just—stop.” Your throw up your hands and Kyle does as you ask. “You are going to move out of my way. I am going to leave. And we won’t talk about this again.”
Kyle only stares, the silence stretching.
When you think he won’t give in, Kyle shifts to his left, leaving the door completely clear. Without taking a second to reconsider, you push open the the door, nearly running over Soap in the process.
He stumbles backward, cheeks bright red. Ghost is next to him, arms crossed, staring at the wall like he isn’t there at all.
Soap’s brief fluster turns into a wide, knowing grin. “Gaz give you a matching one?” he teases.
Ghost makes a noise that sounds like a snort.
“Both of you can fuck off.”
Simon "Ghost" Riley
“Ghost.”
“What?” he grunts, side-eyeing you before returning his attention back to the tablet in his hand. He absently rubs at his neck for the third time in the last few minutes.
You frown. “Are you injured?”
“Why would you think that?” he asks, tapping at something on the screen.
“You keep rubbing your neck.”
Ghost pauses, his finger hovering just above the screen as he turns slightly in your direction.
You’re not trying to be pushy or nosy. Ghosts hates that. But there’s something wrong, and you care enough to ask him about it.
“You know what’s on my neck,” he replies cooly.
“No. I don’t.” A swirling fracture of unease blooms in your belly. It curls outward to claw up your throat. “What are you talking about?”
Ghost’s hand holding the tablet drops to his side. With one gloved hand, he reaches up, tugging the neckline of his jacket down enough to reveal a portion of his throat. The mask he always wears is in the way, but you reach out with a tentative hand, brushing the fabric upward to reveal a mouth-shaped bruise.
You drop your hand and take a step back. “Why would I know anything about that?”
“You gave it to me,” he says, matter of fact.
Sure, you had a few drinks last night, but did you really have that many? Enough that you can’t recall giving Ghost a goddamn hickey.
“You’re mistaken.”
“Never wrong, love.” Ghost locks the tablet and places it on the table next to him. “Especially about a woman sitting in my lap.”
“Don’t,” you say sharply. “Don’t say that.”
“It’s true.”
“It’s not.”
He crosses his arms over his chest, hips adjusting slightly as he pivots to glare down at you. “Try again.”
A deep rush of embarrassment floods your system, curling up your neck to heat your cheeks. “I wouldn’t.”
“You did,” insists Ghost. You glance down at the floor, unable to meet his gaze. Perhaps you had one too many. Sometimes you can hold your alcohol but clearly not. At least not last night.
You clear your throat. “I’m sorry.” An apology is best. You have no idea how Ghost feels about you, but you are irritated that he didn’t try to stop the whole thing in the first place.
Ghost is silent a long moment. “I’m not.” Your head snaps up, but Ghost isn’t done. “I liked it. And you enjoyed giving it to me.”
You need the pieces to fall back into place. You need to remember. Because right now, you’re just confused, and Ghost’s behavior is entirely different from his usual demeanor.
“You don’t know that.”
Ghost shrugs. “I do.”
His certainty is confusing. Ghost is not a liar. He is always truthful, always to the point, even if his bluntness comes across as rude. And that’s what so frustrating about it all because you know that Ghost is right. You probably did like it, probably begged and writhed in his lap. Ghost wouldn’t lie about something like that, but he would tease you. Might even hold it over your head.
“This conversation is over.” You step around him to grab the tablet, but Ghost is quick like a viper, his large hand encasing your wrist.
“Do you remember?”
No. I don’t.
“It doesn’t matter.” You try to tug your wrist out of his grasp, but Ghost holds firm.
“When you’re ready. Find me.” He leans forward, masked face nearly touching the side of your cheek. “We’ll recreate it.”
Then his hand is gone, and Ghost is pulling away, presenting the tablet to you like he didn’t say anything at all.
John "Soap" MacTavish
“What the fuck is that?”
Soap’s brilliant smile turns in your direction. He sits on the seat of a bench press, elbows resting on knees, sweat dripping from his brow. Soap is shirtless and a white towel is draped over the back of his neck.
Reaching up with the edge of the towel, Soap wipes away some of the sweat on his face. “What are you on about?” He adjusts his stance, his large palm pressing into his knee as he leans on an elbow.
The small gym isn’t crowded but there are people here. Some of them turn and glance in your direction but otherwise keep to their business. Ghost and Gaz are over by the boxing ring observing a few new recruits who slug it out for bragging rights.
Is Soap so aloof? Does he not see the massive mark on the side of his neck? And who gave it to him? A group of you went out for drinks but you don’t recall who might have given it to him or when.
You step closer, lowering your voice. “Your neck, Johnny.”
That gorgeous smile of his widens and he chuckles. “Did you forget?”
Did you forget? Forget what? Are you part of this?
You swallow, the salvia nearly sticking in your throat as you try to calm your thudding heart. “What do you mean?”
Soap leans back a bit, observing you. “You gave this to me.” His voice is too loud, and you glance over your shoulder to make sure no one’s heard. Everyone appears to be preoccupied with the recruits in the ring.
“I didn’t,” you insist, turning back to him. “I’d remember.”
Soap guffaws and removes the towel from around his neck. “Took a seat right here.” He indicates the spot by tapping his left thigh.
“Did we…” you begin, and then trail off.
“Did we what?” he prompts, clearly enjoying this.
You bend forward, lowering your voice until it’s a hiss. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”
Soap smirks, and then rises to his full height. “Promise I was a perfect gentleman.” He matches your movement, leaning in so that your faces are close. “But you? You were no lady.”
You inhale sharply, and Soap pushes right past you, heading for the showers.
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evie-sturns · 12 days
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tummy ache - Chris Sturniolo
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summary: your boyfriend chris is typically clingy as it is, but when he comes down with a stomach ache and a fever he can't keep himself off of you.
contains: nsfw, oral (male receiving), flufff, sub!chris, swearing, clingy!chris
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chris and i have been dating for over a year, he's always by my side when we're at home, and like today when we go out.
the blaring music echos through the mall, chris sits down on one of the couches as i sort through various bags i've picked up today, chris hasn't let me pay for any of them.
"um-" chris clears his throat, i look over at him with a small smile,
"i think we need to go home." he whispers with a small crack in his voice, my eyebrows twist,
"oh- no thats fine yeah." i nod, "you okay?" i follow up.
"my stomach hurts." chris mumbles, i stand up with the several bags in my hands and heave him up off the couch.
"aw chris, i'm sorry." i say, grabbing his cold hand and guiding him through the countless people near the exit to the mall.
he goes silent, something that rarely happens meaning something off.
i squeeze his hand lightly and look up at him with a small 'are you okay' look on my face, he shakes his head with a light sigh.
"we'll get you home chris, car is parked just over there!" i smile, stepping out into the parking lot.
i almost drag him over to the car, i swing open the door for him and help him into the passenger seat before walking round the front of the car and jumping in myself, i set the bags down by my feet before looking over at chris.
he just shrugs with a small pout,
"you think your stomach hurts 'cause you had too much soda?" i joke softly, earning a weak laugh from his soft lips.
i press a kiss to his cheek before starting up the car, "you want some music?" i ask before pulling out of our parking spot.
"oh- yeah thank you." chris says quietly before connecting his bluetooth to the car.
--
we pull into the driveway after a short drive, i turn off the car and chris hops out.
i jump out with him and reconnect our hands and walk with him up to the front door, he rubs his eyes as i rummage through my purse for the keys.
i click open the door and step inside,
"you wanna go grab some water and i'll set up the couch for you?" i ask, chris nods eagerly
"yes please, thank you." chris smiles before walking over to the fridge,
"chris-" i call out, "no- no pepsi thats not gonna make you feel better."
"mmgh it always makes me feel better though." he whines, i shake my head,
"water bottles are bottom right" i smile before jogging into the living room, the cool breeze from the air conditioning hits my skin.
i tug a blanket out of the small basket in the corner of the living room before throwing it onto the couch, i walk back into the kitchen and grab a small clear bowl,
"are you feeling throw up sick, or just sore stomach?" i ask,
"i- i dont really know." he wipes his forehead,
"better safe then sorry!" i shrug before trotting back into the living room and flopping down on the plush of the couch.
chris walks into the living room, wearing baggy jeans and a black shirt, his cheeks red and small droplets of sweat on his forehead.
he undoes his belt, leaving him in his loose boxers before he flops down on the couch.
his heavy body is halfway on me as he buries his face into my chest.
i press the back of my hand to his forehead,
"oh sweetheart, you're 'fuckin burning alive." i laugh with a sad smile,
he groans in response,
"c'mon, have a sip of water for me." i whisper, he holds the plastic bottle up to his raw lips and downs a good quarter of it.
chris flops back down onto me, i play with his hair while his head presses on my torso.
suddenly he lets out a crunchy cough, "jesus-" he mutters,
"god- you really are getting sick," i laugh, chris nods as he relaxes into my body.
"i think i'm dying" chris says dramatically, "i think you are okay chris"
"can i do anything else to make you feel better?" i ask, running my hands through his long floppy hair, he hesitates for a moment before opening his mouth,
"just some mind blowing head maybe.." he grumbles, i shake my head with a small scoff
"i mean something serious christopher." i reply,
"i am serious!" he protests.
he looks up at me from his position on my chest with his blue doe eyes, "please?"
i sit up, chris follows and sits up off me as well
i get up off the couch with a small giggle, chris manspreads with a stupid smirk.
i drop to my knees between his legs and rest my fingers on his thighs,
"please..?" he whispers slightly, i reach my hands up to the waistband of his boxers and tug them down teasingly, just enough to reveal his base.
"tell me what you need." i say calmly, chris lets out a needy whine, his leg bobbing up and down on the spot, "please." chris breathes out again.
i tug his boxers down to his mid thighs, his throbbing erection springs out.
i lean foward, wrapping my lips around chris's tip, a soft moan exits his mouth as he gently tangles his fingers into my hair.
i swirl my tongue around his red tip before taking more of him further down my throat, earning a small gag from me.
"close-" chris warns, bucking his hips up, forcing him further down my throat as his hands grip my hair tighter. i pull off his cock for a second to catch a needed breath,
"oh god-" chris protests as his cheeks flush, small droplets of sweat gathering on his forehead, he runs his hand though my hair. i wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, "i know baby." i say, quickly wrapping my mouth around him again as i scratch his thighs with my nails.
i bob my head up and down quicker, chris's whimpers filling the room.
i look up at him with squinted eyes, he squeezes his eyes shut, thrusting his cock deeper into my mouth.
i can see his breathing intensifying before he releases in my mouth, i pull off of him.
"you don't have to swallow that-" he says, placing a hand under my mouth.
i spit it out into his large hand, "you might need to drink more water" i laugh, chris lets out a small giggle,
"i knowww..." he groans, wiping his eyes.
chris wipes his hand on one of the tissues next to the couch before tugging his boxers back up.
i stand up and flop down on chris's lap, straddling him slightly.
chris coughs into his elbow,
"if you get me sick i'll-" i start, but i'm cut off by a crispy cough in my mouth from chris,
"oh my god chris! you're disgusting for that!" i say turning my head away from him with a grin,
"you just sucked my dick its not that gross..."
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5sospenguinqueen · 1 month
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Bedtime Stories | Daniel Ricciardo x Author! Reader
Summary: For the past six years, you've been dreaming of a future with Daniel. Until one silly little interview shatters every illusion.
Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever. End of a relationship. Daniel bashing.
Female reader with various faceclaims. Takes place in the 2022 season.
Main Masterlist
━━━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━━━
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User 2 no, it's not an announcement. her best friend is currently pregnant and she was gushing about looking forward to aunty duties
User 3 omg her and daniel would make the cutest babies though
→ User 4 i bet she can't wait until they have their own mini-me
User 5 imagine our rom-com queen going from writing the cutest but filthiest fiction imaginable to writing about why you should eat your carrots
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22•05•22
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User 6 i can't believe this man was talking about being in the height of his career when he's been nothing but a flop since leaving red bull
User 7 the way he's been stringing this poor woman along for 6 years, knowing how badly she wants children, to then decide in a random interview that he's never going to have kids because they would be a 'distraction'
User 8 fans spotted y/n running from the pits once she saw that daniel was safely done with racing
User 9 i fear we may be witnessing the downfall of something we once held sacred
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16•06•22
fallontonight just posted
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liked by YourUserName, kellypiquet and others
fallontonight did you know @ YourUser Name was once chased by a kangaroo? find out how in tonight's episode of The Tonight Show 📚🦘
4,477 comments
YourUserName thanks for having me! ✨
User 11 excuse me, ma’am, reassess what
User 12 daniel has been absent from her last 3 posts
→ User 1 not even in the likes or comments
→ User 2 and he didn't even congratulate her on the recent book launch
→ User 3 ya’ll are reaching. he's busy racing. she's busy doing book promo. they still follow each other
User 4 anyone notice she didn't look as happy as she usually does
→ User 5 yes! and i swear she got teary when talking about her life plans 🥺
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YourUserName just posted
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liked by maxverstappen1, mclaren and others
YourUserName my happy place 🌊🐚🦀 Aug '22
4,990 comments
User 6 does this mean a new book is coming soon
→ User 7 girl, we’ve just had one. let the woman rest
→ YourUserName sorry, my lovelies but i don’t think i'm in the right headspace to being right a romance novel at this time
→ User 6 confirmation??!?!
→ User 7 we’re children of divorce
→ User 8 honestly fuck those two because i couldn’t have cared less about vroom vroom boys until mother started dating one and now i'm crying in class ‘cause they’re over
landonorris get that bread, queen 🍞
→ YourUserName who let you out of daycare
→ User 9 not y/n and lando interacting like she didn’t break his teammates heart
→ User 10 more like his teammate broke y/n’s heart. let's not make daniel out to be the victim here
kellypiquet p said get writing those children’s books so she can brag about aunty y/n to her friends
→ YourUserName my sweet girl. i saw the cutest dress the other day for her so I’ll pop round soon x
→ User 11 i love their friendship
→ User 12 get this woman a child. She’s too sweet to be stuck in cool aunt mode forever
User 13 anyone notice she didn't do her annual birthday post for daniel?
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04•09•22
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User 14 no because the interviewer was so real for that. checo has a few children and he’s currently 2nd best. max is nowhere to be seen on the grid he's that far ahead and he makes sure p is his priority when she’s there so???
→ User 15 and the way he stormed out. i bet PR are sooo happy with him
User 16 nah because mclaren recently announced that they’re not extending his contract so he currently doesn't have his seat and doesn't have his y/n, all because he thought he was better than that
YourUserName posted a new story
danielricciardo posted a new story
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danielricciardo just posted
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danielricciardo yesterday was something. p17 wasn't the result we were expecting, and the media were a challenge but it's always a delight to be in Suzuka. Moving on to the Americas
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User 1 maybe if y/n was there, you wouldn't have done so badly
User 2 maybe if he had a baby waiting in the paddock he would’ve had more incentive to do better
mclaren we’ll get them next time 💪
User 3 letting mclaren and lando down
→ User 4 the real reason he and y/n broke up is because he has no wins. she should move onto lando or something
→ User 5 he’s way too young for her
→ User 4 they'd make a good looking couple tho
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19•10•22
YourUserName just posted
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liked by charles_leclerc, bloomsburypublishing and others
YourUserName thirty, flirty and thriving. please enjoy a small snippet of my 30th birthday, organised by my favourite girl. these are the nice moments before she plies me full of cocktails and i become the sloppiest person in monaco tagged: kellypiquet
kellypiquet any chance to celebrate you 🤍🤍
→ kellypiquet and an even better chance to drink the entire bar and force max to carry us home
→ maxverstappen1 i'm just glad i was able to pull you both out of the sea before you drowned
landonorris can't believe you tried (and failed) to stop us from gatecrashing
→ YourUserName it was an exclusive event, we don't let randos in
→ landonorris i know you're joking but it still hurts my feelings
maxverstappen1 happy birthday, sloppy. you don't look a day over 40
→ YourUserName i'm gonna let that slide but only because i love the bag that kelly told you to buy
User 7 happy birthday to the best author
User 8 happy birthday queen
carlossainz55 happy birthday, y/n 💐
liked by YourUserName
danielricciardo happy birthday x
User 5 kelly and y/n look like the funnest people to hang out with
→ User 6 literally need to know how to become part of their duo
lewishamilton happy birthday, y/n. have a lovely night 💕
liked by YourUserName
mclaren happy birthday to papaya's favourite author (we're still waiting for a racing rom-com that is quite clearly about your favourite f1 team and their super sexy admin) 🥳🥳
liked by YourUserName
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This is going to be part of a Baby Fever Angst series with the other drivers. So, multiple drivers are going to have an smau like this.
Max’s Version | Lando’s Version | Lance’s Version
Charles’ Version | Oscar’s Version
I do have Part 2s planned if people want them but also happy to leave it like this :)
2K notes · View notes
hoonvrs · 9 months
Text
CIGARETTES — s. jaeyun smau
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PAIRING jake x fmr
SYNOPSIS where university student jake develops a little crush on the girl he sees with a cigarette between her lips in the smoking area and decides he needs to impress her. how else would he do that except calling his smoker friend to teach him how to smoke ( spoiler: it doesn’t go so well. )
GENRE smau, fluff, crack, sprinkle of angst if you read it upside down, golden retriever x black cat duo
FEATURING ( enha ) all, ( ive ) gaeul, yujin, ( nct ) chenle, jisung
WARNING smoking [ don’t smoke kids ], swearing, kys/kms/suicide jokes, friendly bullying, dirty/sex jokes ( more will be added if necessary)
STATUS completed
TAGLIST ( CLOSED )
S. NOTE JAKE MY MANNN ( hoon look away ) as an 02z girl i finally have an smau for each bias so i feel v complete
also please don't spam like as it shadowbans me and lessens engagement <3
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PROFILES
virgin mary’s | smoking HAWT | privs
CHAPTERS
01 BI yourself
02 we found love in the smoking area
03 life is roblox
04 you white whore
05 jake you beautiful bastard
06 are we rush houring rn
07 it’s the dawg in me
08 yuh :3
09 the brit
10 what if i was suicidal .
11 here comes christian bale
12 i don’t trust him. weird fella
13 give us another sonnet english boy
14 bros from yapan
15 he thinks he’s a 90s babe
16 i’m just a girl
17 i’m sat.
18 go piss girl
↳ extra: did life360 tell you that.
19 i got my peaches out in jojo
20 okayy little miss poet
21 i’m built different
22 WAHHHHHHW WAAHHH
23 i want you
24 why are u bricked up
25 PUKA PUKA POW POW
26 jake in his flop era
27 this is getting too homoerotic
28 they go low i go lowER
29 inshallah he will eat
30 hello ross lynch
31 filthy omega
32 u r sobir. die (+written 0.8k)
33 she shoiodv be inde clubbb…..
34 when he makes you his girlfriend
35 can’t take me anywhere
36 noo you’re so sexy haha
37 no. (+written 0.7k)
38 i feel so kawaii today
39 come home fat
40 wasn’t very dabatayo of you jay.
↳ extra: it’s actually dattebayo*
41 ur man can’t drive manual
42 i Want you so bad
43 hawk putuh
44 okay blondie
45 though shalt not fail, but prevail
↳ extra: random
EP1 upset my girl. i’m gonna Kms
EP2 im not smoking that shit
EP3 OUR girlfriend ☭
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copyright © hoonvrs 2023 all rights reserved
3K notes · View notes
inkyray · 2 months
Text
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a/n: send more requests i love doing them for yall
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3k words
warnings/content ahead: bsf!chris x virgin!reader, smut, oral fem!receiving (eating out yess), suggestive, p in v, fingering, pet names (princess), Fritos, missionary, and more come find out
BANG
Your roommate had just left to see her family for the next week, which meant you had the apartment all to yourself for a full 7 days. You were ecstatic, immediately letting Chris know.
-
brobrobro
guess what rn
You type excitedly, your fingers practically shoving a hole through your phone screen. The message immediately goes to seen, and you watch bubbles pop up, indicating he was typing.
You finally came to your senses and decided to move out of that disgracefully small apartment ?
dude no
you know i can't afford that shit
im staying here until i start making the bag i deserve !!!
Right
now guess
You cut all your hair off and went bald
Please tell me you went bald
Actually no
Please tell me you didnt go bald
nah not bald 💔
I GOT THE WHOLE APARTMENT TO MYSELF;!!!! FOR A WEEK!!
Holy fuck
The caps had me go BLIND trying to read
where's the happiness and the cheer
you better start typing back in caps.
YES! 😭 YOU HAVE THE ENTIRE PLACE TO YOURSELF!!
FOR HOW LONG? A WEEK I HEAR? IT'S ALMOST LIKE YOURE AN ADULT!
THAT MUST BE WHY I'M HEARING FOLK MUSIC AND TAP DANCING OUTSIDE! 
god bless ☝️ now come over so we could politely watch a movie
hmmmm Depends
what movie is it
Ya Momma! 😂😅
sounds amazing
I'll be there in a few
-
You close your phone, getting up to quickly clean the place around you.
Chris was no stranger to you, you two had known each other since the day he threw up on you in middle school. He had caught a bug and unfortunately he sat behind you. You didn't really understand how throw up could reach past a desk capacity but it had somehow made it into your hair. Disgusting, horrific week. But he made it up to you.
For him, he moved to LA for work reasons. He was famous, although he didn't like to admit it, nor did it really feel like it for him. You moved because of college, the moment you two graduated out of highschool, it was as if the universe worked hard to get you two closer. And, it worked. You guys were closer now than you were in school.
You would split the rent with your roommate, which was already an expensive bunch, considering this was LA. But Chris would constantly insist on helping you out financially, paying for most of your things when you would practically beg him not to. You had a hard time receiving stuff, but Chris had a problem with giving. You two balanced each other out in that aspect.
You hear a knock on the door, already knowing who it is. It doesn't take you long to reach it. "Why are you holding Fritos?" You ask, huffing a laugh at the weirdly large bag of chips in his hand as he enters your apartment and heads for your bedroom.
"'Cus I wanted Fritos." He answers like it's the most obvious thing in the world, flopping on your bed as you follow him to your room. You notice a few pairs of socks on the floor that you failed to pick up, doing so. "You know, I had to like, Uber here. You know how fucking crazy that is? Ubering to your place? Fucking embarassing." Chris complains, taking off his shoes and cuddling up in your bed.
"Why didn't you just ask Matt?" You wonder, folding your clothes. "Matt didn't want to. I need to get my drivers license, bro. Shit is getting ridiculous." He opens his bag of chips, and your head snaps up. "Chris." You warn as he looks you dead in the eye, a smirk playing on his lips as he slowly raises a chip to his mouth. 
"Chris, I swear to God if you drop a single crumb on my bed."
"I won't." He says, before dropping the chip back in the bag.
"I'm not hungry." He folds the chip bag and places it on your nightstand beside your bed. "You get what I mean though?" He asks, taking off his hat and running a hand through his hair. "Like, I cant ask Matt to fucking, I dont know, drive me to a hook-up or something." He huffs, exasperated from the imaginary scenario he created.
You sit beside him, nodding like you agree, grabbing the TV remote and opening up a streaming platform for movies on your TV. "Oh fuck, imagine I like, pull up to a bad bitches house in an Uber. That's so fucking wild." This time you laugh, "Ubering to get your shit sucked is crazy." You say, scrolling through the endless options of what to watch.
"You ever done that? Ubering to a sneaky links house or something?" Chris asks you, sitting up on your bed. You take a second to answer. "Well, I have my drivers license." You don't know why that would qualify as an answer, but you say it anyway. "But you don't have a car." Chris reminds you. "Right." You confirm, looking at your TV, pretending to be really interested in finding something to watch.
"So? Have you?" He questions with a chuckle, not really sure where you were going with that. "Chris, I'm a virgin." You grin at the irony. A second passes and he realizes you were being serious, his jaw drops. "You're joking."
You shake your head, turning to look at him. "But– you're like, a whore." He says, you scoff, "I'm not a whore?"
"Yeah, you are." He shrugs.
"No, I'm not. I literally just told you I'm a virgin." You put the remote down. "That's why I'm shocked, you would tell me about a new boy every week and then forget about them." He says. You pop a shoulder. "I just never felt comfortable enough with them."
"Oh." He mutters. "So you didn't bang?" He draws out.
"So I didn't bang." You confirm.
"You're nuts, you would say the most diabolical shit about them too." He points a finger at you. "I'm most definitely not." You push his finger down. "How old are you again, 19?"
"19 and untouched." You wink, he stares at you for a moment. "What? Can't wrap your head around the fact I've never been creampied?"
You watch Chris close his eyes, wait for a moment, then open them again. "I'd like for you to wrap your head around it."
"What?"
You two burst out laughing.
-
This movie was devastatingly long and the Fritos on the bedside table were completely neglected.
You and Chris were staring at the TV, both of you pretending to be interested in what was going on. Truth was, you both were lost in your own train of thought.
Chris had resorted to an extra pillow over his lap with his mind racing in all different directions. In his defense, he was human. Once you admitted to him that you were a virgin, he could help but think of all the ways that he could strip that away from you. How easy it would be for him to just bend you over and take that purity away from you.
It wasn't the first time he'd thought of you this way, he couldn't help it. You were gorgeous, and he got lucky with the fact that you were interesting. You were probably the only girl he'd met with a soul as beautiful as her face, that's what made you so special to him.
His eyes quickly darted to yours, who were watching the movie with such intent, he saw the screen reflect in your eyes, a new scene playing. The room was dark, the only light being produced was from the illuminated TV, keeping the place a simple shade of dull blue. His sight drags down to your lips. Your full, plump lips.
Chris wonders if you've ever wrapped them around dick before, sucking just as attentively as you were watching that movie. Sliding your tongue across the tip as you slowly pushed the rest in your mouth, your eyebrows arching as you began to stroke the rest of him. Even then, you'd still be considered a virgin.
You turned to look at him, feeling his gaze on you for too long. He didn't bother looking back, holding your stare as you tried putting together what he was thinking of. "Chris?" You asked with the same lips he was just thinking of. "Hm?" He hums, his eyes lazily back on your mouth, studying every word you form. "You okay?"
He nods, you furrow your eyebrows. He was definitely lost in thought. You lower the volume of the movie and he looks back up at you. "Are you celibate?" He asks, out of nowhere. You're taken by surprise, but answer nonetheless. "Not really?"
"Not really." He repeats on his tongue, as if testing the way it would feel on there. "Okay." He says, voice as low as it could get. "You were just never comfortable?" You nod, confirming it. You watch as his eyes slowly brush over every part on your face, eventually resting on your eyes. Through the enlightenment of the TV screen, you watch his dark pupils dilate over his blue eyes. "Would you be comfortable with me?" He finally asks, voice low. You swallow.
He had multiple strands of hair fly messily in multiple directions, some over his forehead. You raise a hand to neat a messy one on his head down, using two fingers to get rid of any potential knots, soothing your hand through it as he bends his head down, letting you. "Yeah." You answer. "I would."
He lifts his head up, his grin soft but undeniable."You wanna test it out?" You felt your heart cage within itself, but as the second passed you realized you wouldn't want to lose it to anyone else. You have been waiting for this moment for a while, a really, really long and dreadful while.You stared at his fidgeting finger before looking back up at him. A simple nod does the trick, and a hand is on the side of your jaw, guiding your mouth to his. You've kissed before, he knew that, but he was still treating you like a delicate flower. His lips pressed against yours and his hand was soft against your skin. You kissed back harder, licking his lips, forcing them open, insinuating for him to let loose.
Both hands go to grab each side of your face this time, kissing you hungrily as he moves himself from beside you to in front of you. Your neck is cranned up as he sits up onto his knees. You raise your hands and slip them under his shirt, feeling his bare skin as they slide down his torso. He pulls away, immediately taking his shirt off.
You looked up at him, his gaze lingering harshly on you as he stared you down. You bit your lip as he slowly grasped the bottom hem of your T-shirt. "Arms up." He orders, and you lift them. He takes the shirt off of you, bunching it up and throwing it to the side of your room. You aren't sure what to do, you hadn't exactly worn a bra under that. You cross your arms over your chest for some sort of coverage, but Chris quickly laces his fingers around your wrist. "It's okay." He tells you, slowly dragging your arms down. "Are you okay?" He asks soft enough to send a shutter down your spine. "I'm okay." You confirm, he leans down to kiss you once more, pulling away just as soon as his lips meet yours, going to take all of you in. Your body felt hot, your chest feeling as if it was steaming the way he memorized each of your curves. He looked up at you, making direct eye contact as he began to take one tit in his mouth as the other was being caressed by his hand. You throw your head back, surprising yourself with a moan as he begins to give you open-mouthed kisses, his tongue grazing over your nipple, validating its hardness.
His mouth begins to trail back up to your collarbone, leaving desperate kisses until he's reached your neck as his empty hand trailed down the side of your hips, his thumbs curling onto the elastic of your pants, pulling them down as he bit down a hickey. You gripped onto his hair, pulling onto the section that fell above the back of his neck as he distracted your mouth with tongue-filled kisses, but you were extremely aware of the hand that had slipped into your panties, two fingers suddenly pressing against you. You whimper.
"Everything okay, princess?" He breathily asks, watching your face scrunch up as he begins to rub your cunt. "So wet for me, how long have you been dreaming of this?" He tries to catch your eyes but they're sewed shut, the soft noises coming from your mouth giving him all the answers you need. His soft and lengthy fingers suddenly pump into you, and you gasp. "Chris." You utter, feeling him pump in and out of you as his thumb grazes harshly onto your clit. You flinch. "Chris." You moan louder.
"That's right, say my name." He says as he pumps you faster, his other hand grabbing the secure of your jaw. He wanted to feel your mouth back on his, he wanted to feel your moans and whines on his mouth. The clench in your stomach reaches an all time high and your hips buckle. Your stomach loosens and you feel your loud moans muffle harder by Chris's refusal to leave your lips, you feel him smirk under the kiss as you cum all over his fingers. "Feel good?" He questions, your nodding is instant and he laughs at the quickness of your answer. Your hand follows his hair as he begins to lower himself, kissing your stomach, thighs, and then your pussy. His tongue trails down your slit, his mouth collecting what had just been your orgasm. Your thighs immediately close around him, your legs going over his shoulders and crossing at your ankles. It was safe to say you've never been eaten out. Until now. And it was heavenly.
Your hands push down on his head, feeling his nose press against you and a huff of laughter giving your pussy a breathy gust of air. "So needy." He hums, licking your folds.
Embarrassingly enough, you reached your second orgasm, pulling hard onto his hair. He looked up at you, smiling with his teeth as white liquid drooped down them and off his chin. He fixes his posture, sitting up but still between your legs.
Catching your breath, you glare at him. "Still a virgin though." He sings the last word happily, memorizing the image in front of him as his hands massaged your thighs.
"You gonna change that or what?" You finally muster up a few real words, challenging him. He raises an eyebrow, "Oh?"
"Take your pants off for me? Let me feel you, Chris." You tell him, sounding awfully like a whiney, desperate order. The smirk is still playing on his lips, looking at you through his messy hair. "And to think you'd had enough."
"You promised me something, remember?" You palm his dick through his sweatpants, feeling him rock hard against your hand. Instinctively, he pushes his hips into your hand, and you squeeze his large size, whimpers sneak from his mouth. "It's obvious you hadn't had enough, though."
Chris wastes no time shoving his pants off taking it right down with his boxers. His dick springs up and you need a moment to register. Okay, woah.
"Finally fuck me?" You wonder. His grip on your hips were tight, as if he was keeping himself from suddenly ramming himself into you, keeping in mind you were trusting him with your virginity. "Finally." He confirms, the idea of fucking you in his mind since the moment he was able to form a thought like that.
He slowly enters himself in you, and your hand clasps around your mouth, trying to keep yourself from screaming at the sudden stretch. He clicks his tongue, letting out a series of curse words. "Fuck, you are so tight." You answer him by pushing yourself onto his cock as he holds you down. You clench yourself around him and he audibly moans, slowly rocking his hips back and forth. Each thrust was long, slow, and wet, you soaked up each movement desperately.
With his hand still holding onto you, he drops his head to look at the sin you two were participating in, guiding your hips in and out of him. Each pull rhythmic as he pushed himself deeper into you as you clench, trying to get used to the feeling. Your whimpers got louder as he went faster, hypnotized by the scene in front of him. He wanted to keep this memory locked in his head forever, how beautiful you looked sprawled against your bed, moaning his name as he thrusted in and out of you, taking away your virginity.
For a moment it all seemed too good to be real, and he went faster, wanting to see just how the narrative in front of him would go. The thrusts harsher and quicker, you gripped the sheets hard and your moans grew louder. "Taking me so well, princess." He hit your G-spot three times too fast, and you practically blasted him with cum. You tried warning him, but he seemed lost in his own mind. As if on cue, he pulled out the moment you came all over his dick. "Fuck." He followed that up with your name, finishing as his orgasm splattered on your stomach and chest, where he'd specifically aim it there.
He flops down on the empty spot beside you, both you guys attempting to catch your breath. A few seconds of shocked but comfortable silence pass.
He turns his head to look at you. "Good or nah? Wanna try again?"
"What, like, take my virginity again?"
"Yeah."
"How about we try a nice shot at my first ever aftercare, yeah? Then I'll consider it."
"Right, of course."
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