#I am going back to fucking bed

[kowabungadoodles]

dumping some thoughts in the tags

#I've been TRYING hard okay #I've been trying to buy better clothes from smaller shops #but when they arrive it turns out they're cheap polyester drop ship crap #I've been trying to get more involved in the queer community and be more of a person #but the online zoom meetings were uncomfortable #the discord transmasc voice class went badly because I didn't understand how to use the bot #I booked a queer film night for me and my partner but it turned out to be creepy and churchy so we dropped out #I've signed up to steward pride we'll see how that goes #I went to a protest but it rained a lot so I only stayed for half #I've been trying to use amazon less but every time I go around my small local stores they don't have any of the stuff I'm looking for #I'm trying to be more myself and be more brave but my binders don't fit and I can't use a sewing machine #and every time I speak to a stranger or a colleague my voice goes up #I'm trying to work out more and eat less but I'm so tired #I'm trying to boycott and buy slave-free and say no to Ai and to genocide and to tiktok and disney and nestle and spotify #Telling myself I have food at home and to stop scrolling reddit and got get more sleep and to call my friends #All this therapy all these good choices all this work and so little to show for it some days #I am going back to fucking bed

[lazylittledragon]

do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great

i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually

#ramble #yes this is the artist's perspective bs and yes this is anxiety because it's 1am #and yes i'm forever learning and growing but also #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. #drawing my little guys is fun but i am not good enough for the industry right now and that fucking sucks #i really feel like if i walked into a studio with my portfolio right now they would laugh at me #one of those days where i wish i'd done a more useful degree y'know #i'm going back through the phase where i don't know what i'm going to be anymore and it's scary #some days i really want to give it up and never draw again and do something worthwhile because i Know my life would be easier #and i hate that something i love so much makes me feel so hopeless #signs that i should go to bed ^^^^ #i will resume my pity party tomorrow

[thedisablednaturalist]

Tw for weight loss mention

The whole exercise will cure your disability thing is a fucking joke. Yes exercise is beneficial for your health, but only if you aren't already on shaky foundations. You need to be on a treatment plan that WORKS before going into the maintenance phase. You wouldn't do regular maintenance on a broken item, you'd work on getting it up and running first. And maybe it would even need specialized maintenance afterwards if it's especially fragile.

I have fibromyalgia and acute degenerative disc disease. My immune system attacks my nerves and discs in my spine are slowly calcifying and causing the bones to constrict and damage my nerves (i think thats how it works). I have days where it feels like my body is on fire from nerve pain and days where it feels like my spine is about to rip from my back. And days where I have both (like today!). I get numbness in my hands and feet. I have horrible migraines. I can no longer walk unaided more than maybe 5 minutes without severe pain. I have something wrong with my knees and hips but the doctors don't know what yet.

You'd think I live an obviously seditary lifestyle correct?

Hell no.

I walk aided on average 6 miles a day over difficult terrain OUTSIDE of regular activity almost everyday. My legs are muscular and strong. I get my heart rate up and a good sweat, like all the gym rats swear on. I am often doing physical labor such as weeding, digging, sample collecting, pruning trees etc.

I'm not saying this to make other disabled people feel bad or prove that they can do anything if they just tried harder. This is an extremely painful lifestyle I've chosen that takes a lot of lifestyle management AND BOUNDARIES to keep up with the work. I also have an extremely forgiving boss who is also physically disabled and knows what I'm going through (deciding between your passion and your health and having to do so each and every day) No one should ever be expected to do what I do. I'm not even sure if I should be doing this myself.

This is to prove that exercise? Has not cured me. My muscles are strong but still hurt as if they're broken and I have to take more breaks than my coworker. I am constantly getting out of breath and I flare up regularly if I'm not careful. I am in excellent physical condition outside of my disabilities. I go to different doctors several times a month to get checked out.

I previously went through a diet program and lost a lot of weight (basically starving myself and got off my depression meds which cause weight gain but are also the only ones that work) and guess what? That didn't do shit either!!! I still felt horrible!!! I've since gained back the weight anyway after switching to focusing on adding more nutrient dense foods than taking stuff away from my diet (also muscle weighs more than fat, and fat helps cushion my aching joints and spine).

The muscle doesn't do shit for my disabilities outside of maybe some stability. Exercising everyday doesn't make the pain go away. Without my medications and aids and nutrition plans and steroid injections and spinal adjustments and physical therapy (that takes my fibro and spine into account) and alternative work methods I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO WHAT I DO. Exercise alone is like trying to make a car run with no oil. Yes it'll go but it'll get more and more damaged till it can't and will need its entire engine replaced!

And yet I see new doctors and they look at me and the first thing out of their mouths is do I exercise? I should try doing a little every day :) and then i fucking blow their minds when I tell them about my job. No longer can they use that fucking cop out on me. I've been through this rodeo. Ive tried their suggestions. If you are in pain and nothing is helping? Exercise ain't going to do SHIT. You need to get to a point where you can move without severe pain first (if that's even possible). Then and only then should you consider implementing regular exercise if you can. Also weight loss talk is a red flag and a cop out. They made me lose 50+ lbs before they would look into the reasons behind my pain. Weight loss did nothing for me and exacerbated my pain.

I am living proof that all that shit is a lie and a cop out. That is the point of this post. I cannot believe people with serious medical conditions are being forced to put their bodies through extreme duress just to be believed. You are not disabled because of laziness or because you sit a lot. Plenty of people live seditary lifestyles and do not live in constant excruciating pain (they may develop disabilities later in life due to this however, and should be doing preventative exercises to maintain their health)

Please, share my story with doctors. Use me as an example. I am proof that "exercise first treat later" does not work. I should not have had to wait years to have my pain validated. I'd rather hundreds of fakers get (what? A blood test? An MRI?) than one chronically ill person get told to try yoga and go away by a doctor.

#wrenfea.exe #doctors and nurses dont fucking clown on this post #anything you say needs to be backed up by sources with apa citation thrown in for good measure #this is my personal experience dont tell me im exaggerating or just havent tried hard enough #i will kick you with my horse legs and then go lie down for 4 hours #bedbound people i am sending you so much love and will probably be joining you in a few years #chronic disability #chronic pain #spoonie #fibromyalgia #disability #chronic illness #from the field #physically disabled #this also applies to neurodivergent and mentally ill people but pls don't derail #this is mainly about physical disabilities #you are welcome to make your own post and reference mine if you want @ me and ill reblog it #sometimes im like oh i cant be disabled bc i do all this stuff im a faker inflatrating the community #and then i have days like today where i cannot leave my bed #i am so pissed off that people with long covid and ME have to go through that fucking exercise rehabilitation program #that actively makes their mitochondria worse #you wouldnt start using a vase without fixing the cracks first #the water will spill out and the flower will die #degenerative disc disease

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

headcanon that scorpius was a sick child and was in and out of hospital constantly, perhaps related to astoria's blood curse but not directly. his immune system isnt very strong, and everytime he gets sick they're terrified that it's the blood curse but also whatever else it could be, because it's always so sudden and so intense and they call healers over to the house who recommend this delirious feverish 4 year old is hospitalised immediately, and you'd think it'd get easier to some extent because they'd be used to it, but everytime they feel like this is it, this is the time he'll walk in to the hospital and not walk out again

#this headcanon has no purpose im just thinking of scorpius in bed like a sickly victorian child with scarlet fever or something #asking if he'll make it to sunrise lmfao #so then he hates hospitals with a passion #my friend from school was in them constantly he was even a make a wish kid and he can not fucking stand the places so #headcanon scorpius becomes a healer anyway lmao #im sick and this is how im coping by putting baby scorp in hospital lmfao #it just made draco that little bit more protective #lucius made an insensitive comment about it once and draco was ready to throw hands #this headcanon doesnt really go anywhere ive just decided scorpius was a sick child #he has sick child energy lmfao #he still knows some of his doctors/healers because he was there so frequently #just imaging lil scorp in a hospital bed and draco and astoria are sleeping in the room on like uncomfortable chairs and the fever finally #breaks and hes like uh daddy im hungry and its like 4am but draco couldnt care less cause scorp hasnt been able to eat anything for days #let alone ask for food directly and baby scorp is wondering why his parents are acting so damn weird just cause he asked for some toast #but once hes grown up whenever he gets sick its on such a lower level than what it used to be when he was a kid because his immune system #got better that he struggles to gauge when other people would usually stop trying to do daily activities and albus has to start wrestling #scorpius back to bed instead of going to class cause scorpius really youre practically dying and hes like pfff you wanna see dying? use tha #timeturner one more time and go back to see me at literally any point between 2 and 10 i am FINE #(he absolutely was not fine) #scorpius malfoy #albus potter #draco malfoy #hpcc #scorbus #this is so many tags im so sorry

[sunshinediaz]

tease tuesday + wip wednesday 🕊

(i'm smashing these 2 days together because i like to break the rules)

anyway have a lil bit of hoa eddie, uh, getting a hard dick for buck before dinner with his Nemesis

“You’re staring at me.” Buck shuffles forward, a few steps away from Eddie; he smells like mint and vanilla because he used Eddie’s shampoo like he always does and roses, too, that expensive cologne he pays half an arm for.  “I am.”  “Do I look bad?”  No. Not at all. He’s wearing tight black jeans that hug the length of his long, thick legs in a way that leaves nothing to the imagination and a black knit sweater that has his biceps bulging and his tummy poking through and it’s obscene because he’s so goddamn thick that even normal clothes look small on him.  Buck looks all different kinds of great and Eddie doesn’t know what to do with that or the tickle in his chest, the heavy heat in his gut. The gold chain with the little sunshine at the bottom sits pretty between his tits, a present Chris got him last year for Christmas that’s a fucking gift right now for Eddie. Christ.   He blinks. “No,” he says, maybe a little too fast, but he can’t be blamed. Especially not when Buck looks as gorgeous as he does, in front of Eddie and in his bedroom with a door that locks. “You look pretty. That color is nice on you.”  “It’s black.”  “Okay?” Eddie bristles. The tips of his ears burn. “It looks good.”  Buck fingers the hem of his sweater. “Thanks,” he says, whisper-soft and ruddy-cheeked like he’s embarrassed or something, before looking up and giving Eddie a dazzling smile. “You, uh, look good, too.”  And Eddie does. He’s wearing his best pair of blue jeans and a dark green sweater he found in the back of his closet that he knows looks good on him because Marisol couldn’t keep her hands off when he wore it, but he has nothing on Buck. Nothing at all.  “Buck—” “I need—” Christopher barges in the room, knocking the door against the wall like he pays the bills. “You guys take so long.” 

tagged by @daffi-990, @jesuisici33, and @wikiangela mwah i adore all of you!

tagging @callmenewbie, @callaplums, @eddiebabygirldiaz, @eddiediaztho, @honestlydarkprincess, @wildlife4life, @thewolvesof1998, @try-set-me-on-fire, @exhuastedpigeon, @fortheloveofbuddie, @giddyupbuck, @ladydorian05, @loserdiaz, @monsterrae1, @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy, and anybody else who wants to share 🫶🏼

#let me get mushy real fast and say these games really hold me accountable for actually working on shit instead of just #letting it rot in the wip folder #because this fic is nearly 30k and it's only halfway through #and i'm BEGGING my brain to get it finished before the new year my fucking god #and i'm excited to share the WHOLE thing with yall and not just these out of pocket snippets because #eddie is on some other type of level in this and he just gets better every fuckin second i swear #anyway! #i will be back later #am going to take a small nap because i didn't go to bed until 5:30 and wound up waking up at 8:30? what a bitch #tag games

[figofswords]

the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something

#WHAT AM I DOING!!!! #i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch #too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun #no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point #trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this #WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!! #there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time #my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me #my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job #i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time #i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again #and WHAT DO I WANT! #THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY! #I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!! #anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed #delete later #i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious) #versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected) #i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want #ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you #i miss that i want that back #whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go

[thatgirlonstage]

sometimes a show throws a scenario at you that you could see coming a hundred miles off but that in no way is gonna prevent you from going absolutely feral over it. Anyway I binged all of Link Click in like three days and I'm going to start chewing furniture about the end of S2

#link click #am I SURPRISED that lu guang is without question on board to #go against all his own rules and break reality for cxs? #not really. it's kind of what you expect just from the premise #am i still screaming into a pillow about it? #OH ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY #FUCKING MADOKA SHIT. HELP ME. #fellas is it gay to fuck with time and disregard all possible consequences #because the alternative is letting your Best Friend die and that's simply not an option #i want... to write... bed sharing fic so bad #they really made CXS For Me like #you have the absolutely perfect excuse to just drop this boy into a trauma blender at any given moment #anyway i think he should get like. trapped in a cave-in or something #anything that makes him terrified of being left alone #and when he comes back out he just desperately needs lg to hold him and not let go

[oatbugs]

pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me! #LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️ #but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

[cherrirui-official]

Finally was able to finish Gerber after two months of not being able to really use blender wahoo wahooo

Dont ask me when I'm gonna do Salty, they'll be real soon.

@saltydkart-reblogs

#If u followed me on Twitter you've probably seen my Mikey and Pastey 3d models already teehee #I said I was doing Gerber next but ended up having to push back on working on it due to a lot of personal stuff going on #I havent settled down yet but Im in a good position to work on them again! #I even updated the other two models to look kiiinda nicer #Im still new to this stuff so they aint the best models but I think they look okay :)!!! #I am dreading the moment I start working on Salty's hair like how do u model that????? #thats gonna make me scream loud as fuck #saltydkdan #cherris canvas #a knee ways im going to bed

[honeypleasejustkillme]

“how did that t break go?”

#this past week has been fucking insane. i literally am on my death bed #it’s rough out here #my fuckin nose bled for an hour and a half yesterday and i vomitted blood 6 times. #went to the er and got told i was fine and go home and then had to go back and finally they cauterized it #i hate doctors honestly #bpd shitposting #actually bpd #actually mentally ill #bpd #bpd fp #actually borderline #bpd favorite person #bpd vent #bpd mood #bpd problems #my awful awful t break

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

my stepdad's a real one fr...

#i mentioned that my mom called #and he left the room. came back. and put an edible in front of me #1) that was fucking Hilarious #2) thaaaaaaank GOD i need it #he was all like 'take that an hour before you go to bed #yes Sir 🫡 gladly sir 🫡 #i would've liked one with a bit more of a Kick to it but i am nooooot complaining!!! #*insert looping gif of the cat jumping up & down w/ added yippee sound effects* #absolutely unprompted #tonight i will finish the next comm. indulge in some laughingstock perhaps. and then get Stress Free via Tasty Nibble #oh i can't wait for it to kick in... #ive been so stressed for so long... whats it like to live without chest pain & nausea from Intense Anxiety.... i will soon know! #i think i will take the inner peace opportunity to actually eat something #bc when im this stressed i Cant. i simply cannot! #which is so unfortunate because food & eating is one of my favorite things! i love it so much! #and im being Deprived of it!!!!

[ef-1]

girlhood

#i have to fly out to capetown to see mother and im literally debating if i could land in the morning and leave at night on the same day #like. anything longer than that is going to ruin my year. #when she called and did her “katherine. you have to be here on the 10th” i literally sobbed in my bed for the rest of the day 😍😍😍 #not dyeing my hair black for a year and its getting lighter and lighter everyday and i look like her again #and my therapist telling me “you need to do things for yourself.” but like can i? sorry that woman traumatised me and i actually cant :) #like everything i do is informed by her #I'm going to go and just like everytime the only way to keep my sanity is to mirror her. talk and sit and speak and read and eat like her #and its such a terrifying experience bc i remember that im capable of emulating her viciousness and maybe i am my mother's daugher 🤢🤢🤢 #and im going to come back and its going to take fucking months for me to feel like myself again #“oh you look so beautiful just like your mother” i hope you DIE lol !!! the fact that my conception of beauty was shaped by her #growing up with this cruel beautiful detached woman and realising that at the intersection of beauty and wickness is a lifetime of pain #and still being so desperate for her approval- for any metaphysical proximity to her that i felt elated when #people would tell me i look like her. that it meant i was also beautiful like her and maybe she'll love me a little for it #but now i know for a fact that i do look like her and it makes saliva swell under my tongue - that moment right before you throw up- #when people mention it 😍 #last time i was in capetown my optic neuritis flared up (and i know for a fact it was that it was ms-stress related from having to see her) #and i thought i hid it so well even though i had near constant headaches & lethargy until she said “katherine give me the red notebook” #and i knew that she knew all along. it was so acutely humiliating standing there and knowing she knows i cant see which one is the red one #and she tilted her head and said “whats the matter? do you not know what red looks like?” #im never going to have kids. my mother and i read eachother so well it can only mean im never too far removed from becoming her #lol!!!!!!!!!

[dimonds456]

thinking about freehoun so bad tonight oughhhhhhhhhhhh

#i wanna draw it so bad but i need to eat and then go to bed #like- just the idea of the rescas. barney sees gordon being dragged away and is forced to leave him #and even though he knows gordon lived- he defeated the nihlanth after all- he's still never going to see him again #the vorts say he's alive- they INSIST he's alive- but he'd still be on xen with no way to get back #and then barney just exists selflessly trying to help the resistance for 20 years #every so often he hears about gordon coming back one day and fuck he wants to believe that but he just *cant* #until he sees him at the train station #holy shit. it's him. and he hasn't aged a damn day. #barney can't even properly reunite because they would get caught and killed #so he calls issac and sends gordon on his way trying so so so hard to pokerface for the rest of his shift #when he gets back he only finds out gordon is on the run and in danger #and he cant do shit to help him #and when gordon gets to black mesa east barney isn't even there #all that- all of half life 2- and they can't properly reunite #and then the citadel explodes #man. he would ABSOLUTELY think gordon was just fucking killed then. #and when he STILL survives... just. imagine this with me. #im ill. i am so very very ill #freehoun #half life #dimond speaks

[yorshie]

Pea Brained Bounce House time. Was thinking about the earlier Mikey bit. Then I started thinking about Warm Coded. And then:

Raph’s got like. This thing, when you’re working out with him. He uses the cover of coaching you to stare.

It’s not until he’s got you doing chairs against the concrete wall, and you look up in pleading askance on how much longer you’ve gotta hold the position, that you finally catch the way his attention is trained on the swell of your stomach. The uncanny focus of his gaze on your thighs as the muscles start to tremble and seize up.

Raph likes to stare.

#……. hm. is this gonna be a blood orange fic? #are they gonna converge? #looks at the blurple fic I’m already planning. fuck. this might be a blood orange fic #but how would that even work? #Mikey is so much harder to set a boundary with than Leo and Donnie #and what about my head canon of Mikey sneaking into Raph’s bed during nightmares? #I could just see. raph wakes up and readers all against him all warm and cuddly #he goes for the sleepy morning action #but his hand knocks against Mikey’s shell and there’s like the awful dawning realization that his little bro is cock blocking him #cue Mikey waking up cuz you smell all warm and he wants action too #only for the same realization to have th both going >:[ at each other #raph gets up like fuck this I’ll be a good boyfriend I’ll go get breakfast. you want pastries doll? I'll get you fucking pastries #and Mikey’s like fuck that I’ll be a better boyfriend I’m gonna go make homemade juice #and then reader is like. wtf where are my cuddly buddies? Why is everyone so pissy this fine morning? #<- zero clue they are in the middle of a pissing contest #goes to take a morning shower and gets interrupted cuz Mikey doubles back #youngest sibling gotta take advantage of the older one being out and all that #I could just see him all annoyed halfway to the Kitchen before going *wtf am I doing* and backtracking to corner reader in the bathroom #raph drags reader back in his room and closes the door in mikey's face when he gets back with pastries #cuz personal space (nest) privileges and it was cold outside and damn it he's was a good boyfriend he deserves cuddle time #also he didn't get mikey any pastries #proceeds to show reader there's more than one way to enjoy a pastry #……… have to think about this one actually plot poly is hard #raccoon rambles

[borkwolf]

Help I am rewatching Ninjago with my roommate and I have been catapulted directly back into the fandom. mmmrrrghh legos

#perhaps i will draw the silly little pajama people. or who knows perhaps it will inspire me to finally sit down and Write Things!!! #hmm thinking about it. making a ninjago rewrite would probably be fun. but also i should probably wait until i rewatch the seasons i have #watched and catch up on the seasons that i have not seen #ninjago was my first ever fandom and it was inevitable that i would someday fall back into it LMAO. i have been staying up reading fanfics #like i have not really done for a LONG while. and they are giving me!!! so many ideas!!!!!!!!! #i have to learn how to draw people so i can draw these goofy fucks #ANYWAYS #this is borkwolf and it is 7:14 am. i am going to bed now :] #bork borking into the void #ninjago

[kakyogay]

ah yes time to come up with a totally cool srs drawing idea THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE THEIR HORRIBLE COPING MECHANISM that is really cool and really awesome and DOEN'T EVEN INCLUDE ANYTHING ABOUT THEIR FUCKED UP PAST THAT I REFUSE TO SHARE that will be cute and fluffy and NOT BE AFTER SOME FUCKED UP SHIT oh boy that would be so cool and awesome and cool and awesome and cool and awesome

...

...

I got nothing...

#how my art is going rn :D #um uh um um uh uh I dunno hey look vod of cool youtuber playing cool new game!!!! *stares at it for the next 3 hours* #no I will not practice fucked up gore art even though I would like to get better at it and want to make cool stuff I cannot Im usn't #I need to draw the gays I have ideas for them but my brain just goes back to the pain and angst and ouch #anyways it's 2:30 am I need bed time goonigh <3