#I believe that as a society we could learn so much about each other by drawing miku

[sanshiori]

Whole lotta miku

#I believe that as a society we could learn so much about each other by drawing miku #art #hatsune miku #vocaloid

[bomberqueen17]

don't know where else to put it

I was going to do a big wrap-up of Everything I Learned From The Must Farm Site Report PDFs but then life got super busy. So I only have the things I turned over and over in my mind, just now, and I want to go back and reread but now's not the time, I'll have to do another pass through at a later date.

But the one tiny vivid little factoid I've got in my mind that I just have to write down-- that necklace, with the big amber bead? Some of the glass beads were shattered from the heat but the amber bead was only charred a little on one side. So obviously some of the necklace was closer to the fire than the rest. I had initially connected that it was found near where there was probably a door, and I vaguely imagined someone dropping it as they fled. But now I'm convinced that's not it at all.

It was hanging up. It was hanging on a peg or a hook or a twig or something, right near the door, maybe even on display, and the big heavy amber bead was hanging at the bottom, and the glass beads were hanging at the top, and the fire at that point spread down from the roof and it burned through the string, and the glass beads shattered and the necklace fell down and when the floor collapsed it wound up in the mud.

The other thing I keep thinking is that the fire has to have started while no one was home. And modern people don't think about this, but in a premodern society where you've got a group of people living in a house, where you don't have appliances you can turn on and off, where starting a fire takes serious effort and getting it to a state where you can cook on it takes hours, where the food served at daily meals has to be the full-time job of several people because it's so labor-intensive--

there's never going to be a time where everyone is out of the village. There's going to be a sickly or elderly person who can't really get out of bed or move far, or a new mother who's just given birth and can't travel, and there'll be someone home to tend to whoever that is, and while they're home they're tending the fire and getting dinner started. There's just always someone there. I could see maybe one house being unoccupied for a brief time, but a village, that probably had at least ten houses if not more, and each house had ten people in it? Someone would be home. And those who weren't home wouldn't be far. We know the wheat etc. that the village was eating was grown on dry land, and the flax they were processing into fiber, but it could not have been far away. And the Fenlands are flat. You'd see smoke. Before the first house was even engulfed someone would have noticed the smoke and they'd be hurrying home.

But nobody tried to fight the fire. Nobody spread it, but nobody fought it either. Nobody pulled any timbers out to save them. Nobody threw water on anything.

Nobody was there. The houses were empty. Nobody fled the fire, because they weren't there to see it start, or they would have been able to stop it.

They hadn't been evacuated in any organized way, or surely the bead necklace would have been taken. Even if they were in a hurry, at least the pot full of cooked food would have been taken, or emptied into something more portable to bring along! There was so much prepared food lying around. And the thread bobbins-- bobbins and bobbins of painstakingly-spliced flax they'd grown and rippled and scutched, some of it then painstakingly plied, hours and hours of several people's labor, and it was on little bobbins, you could sweep that into a basket along with your bulkier household goods and barely take up any space at all and save hundreds, maybe thousands of hours of labor later when you needed to weave some new fabric. Thread like that was precious, and it's portable, and I can't believe they'd choose to leave so much of it behind if they had any chance to choose what they brought with them.

As I'd said, it's beyond possibility that everyone had gone out to do some job-- there would be people left behind in the houses for that. Maybe everyone had gone out for some religious observation, maybe. Maybe something was important enough to even haul out the oldsters and the infants, and to put off dinner until late. Maybe. it's possible. But someone (probably in Structure 1) just didn't bank the fire correctly, and it got away and got into the roof beams. A properly-banked fire wouldn't do that, and surely these people, managing cooking fires for their entire lives, would know how to do it. But even then I can't imagine them going that far, and again, they'd see the smoke and hurry home. Even if it was a religious rite they'd still hurry home from it, there's no way they wouldn't have come back.

So it seems to me that they had to have been forced out. No notice, no chance to pack, everything left where it was, last night's supper still in the pot, tonight's bread still rising on the trays, the lambs in their pens and the dog tied up in House 5.

I can't imagine what forced them out. It wouldn't be weather. It could be enemies. There were no weapons found in the houses, but that might mean they'd taken them with them-- except the spears, perhaps they were only hunting spears but you'd think still if everyone ran out to fight they would take them too, the spears and the axes; if it was a situation where they had to last-ditch defend themselves the non-warriors would certainly arm themselves with the wood axes and the hunting spears. But they didn't.

So my conclusion is that they all were forced to leave in a hurry, without banking the fires, without putting anything away, and they were prevented from returning. The cause could be human enemies-- perhaps the warriors of the settlement had gone out to fight and been defeated, and the victors came here and the survivors knew they could not fight and so came out unresisting to meet their fates.

The cause could be something religious or spiritual-- something they believed in made them leave and prevented them from returning. It would have to be incredibly compelling, however, because leaving without their food or their cooking pots or their domestic goods (the little bobbins of thread!!!!! you could easily carry those!!) would make it very hard for them to make their way in the world.

The cause could be-- I really don't know what else. Disease would maybe make them abandon a settlement, maybe leave no trace if they buried their dead on land, but they would pack first. Most things, they would pack first, they wouldn't leave cooked food sitting out, they'd bring the lambs and dog with them. Any orderly evacuation, they'd have brought the lambs and dog with them. They have to have left in a hurry without a chance to prepare. And there was no attempt at salvage afterward, they didn't come back to look for anything they'd left. The ruins of the burned buildings would have stood visible for decades, the ends of roof timbers above the water, much of structure 4 (possibly the gate house entrance) above the water, the palisade probably unburnt for much of its length. It would have been easy to find. There are only a couple of disarranged timbers in Structure 3 to suggest anyone ever poked through the wreckage at all, and that's not much to go on. Certainly nobody dug around in the mud, which would have been quite shallow at some times of year.

And while it's possible the evidence of what happened existed once, somewhere in the long-vanished sections of the village-- perhaps the fire started at that end, perhaps they tried to fight it there, perhaps they tried salvage over there and discovered the fire had burned too hot to make it worthwhile, perhaps the bodies of the villagers were all dumped into the channel over there after whatever battle there was-- perhaps there was all kinds of stuff. But I just think whatever it was left no trace. So many of the possibilities would now be invisible, three thousand years later.

All we have is the facts: They left in a hurry, leaving their lambs in their pens, their food on the table, the dog tied up in the house, the cooking fires not banked.

And whatever made them leave, they never came back.

#must farm #bronze age #british history #archaeology #unknowables

[fizzfags]

EMIZEL/FIZZFANGS ANALYSIS

the long awaited. under the cut bc its really long and im fucking insane. (this does not necessarily focus on them as a romantic pairing, just the way they interact with each other. interpret it in whichever way is most compelling to you/what you see fit.)

EMIZEL:

the most notable thing about emizel is the fact that he is mainly motivated by status and climbing the social hierarchy in whatever situation he is currently in. in his human life, that was climbing the ranks within the demons. after he dies, he doesnt really understand the social hierarchy within vampire society, but he does understand that its very important to at least be in good standing.

(episode 2)

he has an inherent disrespect towards authority, also seen with his father, (which i will get to later) as seen with this interaction with arthur. he's insistent on meeting the important figures within vampire society in la, and prioritizes this over, say, learning how being a vampire actually works. in the same episode, he also tells arthur "It just seems like we have similar goals, you know? I clearly don't know what I'm doing in vampire society. You do. So I need to learn. And you did say you'd take responsibility for teaching me." keep in mind that this is only a week or so after he was turned. things become interesting when we see him interacting with said important figures.

(episode 4)

in a stark contrast to arthur, hes relatively polite and respectful. obviously, this is to build favor for himself within the community of important and respected figures. also notable, he is lying out of his fucking ass. this is probably my biggest piece of evidence against the people that genuinely believe that emizel is unintelligent, because he clearly knows what hes doing.

as stated in the tweet, he gets killed/injured makes stupid decisions so often because he's used to operating under the rules of the demons and normal human society, and he hasnt learned that consequences and rules are enforced much harsher in regards to vampires. his rash and impulsive personality/decision making skills/opposition to authority figures that he doesnt like just isnt compatible with vampire society, and this leads to him getting hurt (see any and all of his interactions with edward)

(episode 4)

so, we know he lies to get what he wants (status, respect, etc) and doesn't feel bad about it. now is time to address his upbringing. obviously, it was not great. he has a very negative relationship with his father, and it wouldn't be too big of a stretch to describe it as potentially abusive. "Listen, I've lived with this guy my whole life. He's always kind of been a piece of shit to me, so do what you want - I couldn't care any less. But, if you're making me choose between my wellbeing and his, then I'm always going to choose me. Besides, I can't do any of that mind shit anyways." (episode 2) we can most likely assume he joined the demons relatively young, as a way to escape or have a place to stay other than his dads house. this is also probably the source of his opposition to authority, especially those that act negatively towards him.

(episode 6)

episode 6 is very interesting. emizel risks his life to go back to the unseen one to ask a very specific question: "why did i get abandoned with my father, and why did shilo get to stay?" also noting that his most precious memory is one he had with the demons. when shilo asks about this question, he gets very defensive, because he knows that shilo would have an answer for him, but its not the answer he wants. if he tells them, they wont let him go back to the unseen one. of course, his question is left unanswered, and he asks it again in episode 10.

another very interesting thing happens in episode 10: he willingly gets rid of all memories of his father. he had a lot of other things he could have given up, but he specifically chose his father. with the definite negative impact his dad must have had on him, and how highly emizel prioritizes strength, it wouldnt be a stretch to say that he viewed the trauma of living with his father as a weakness, something to get rid of instead of grow and heal from. it would take time, a resource he isn't willing to share.

so, why is emizel so motivated towards power and status? with all this, the answer is pretty obvious: he wants to be able to build the life he was never able to have. power and status means money means opportunities means choices means a better life. he wants an escape from la, from his father, from everything he's had to deal with growing up. hes constantly reminding himself that its not fair, its not fair that shilo got to live that way, its not fair he was abandoned and stuck here. so he wants to make it fair for himself and the rest of his posse. those he considers his family. his jealousy motivates him.

so of course a wrench is thrown in everything when he loses that emotional connection to most of his friends (except theo. which i will get to) and finds himself just not caring anymore. the thing hes built his life around, spent years climbing the ranks - all for nothing. but what else can he do but continue on. find another distraction, find another goal.

THEO:

we don't know much about theos past other than he (supposedly) lives in the suburbs and has rich parents. (referenced in episode 8) though this is debatably canon, i think its interesting if it is because it brings up a lot of questions. most notably, why did he join the demons? the most obvious answer is that it's the same as emizel: his parents suck. though of course none of this is canon, so moving onto the things that are.

the first major event that happens to him is emizel being turned. he sees emizel less, "No shit, really? You know Emizel? How is he keeping up? He's kinda, been disappearin' every night." (episode 2) and we can assume emizel is a big part of his life. (which i will get to later) and then, thanks to shilo, a core aspect of his personality is stripped away. his entire life is essentially turned on his head, and he can feel something missing. so, as seen in episode 5, he turns to alcohol. its no surprise why, he's lost the sense of normality, his routine, everything he was used to. so he may as well do this. a lot of theos more interesting aspects only really show when hes interacting with emizel, so time to get to the fun part.

FIZZFANGS AS A WHOLE:

a very interesting thing is that emizel and theo act very differently when talking/interacting with each other than any other character. dialogue-wise, they both talk a lot faster and "messier" around one another, interrupting themselves and eachother to finish each others thoughts.

(episode 3)

just by their conversations, you can tell they're very close. this particular instance also has two other interesting things in it: theo asking what he can do to help emizel, and condi specifying that theo would be the only person emizel would tell about being a vampire. to address the first part, here is a complete list of all the times theo asks emizel what he should do/what he should do to help/etc (and this is an incomplete transcript, so ive probably missed a couple.)

"Alright, you lead the way man, let's do it." (ep 1)

"What's going on here? What do I do? What do you want me to do, man?" (ep 1)

"No man! I'm not leaving you, man! I can take him. I can still take him." (ep 1)

"I'm not leaving you, man!" (ep 1)

"Well, how can I help you with the non-soda related-?" (ep 3)

"Yeah! I mean... What should I do first?" (ep 3)

"So you just let me know whenever you need? I got you, bro." (ep 3)

"So, uh… Anything I can help with?" (ep 5)

"Don't worry, man. I got you. Where am I taking you?" (ep 5)

"So, um… how, c- how can I help you, man?" (ep 8)

this fucking crazy interaction:

(episode 3)

so it goes without saying that theo would do anything for emizel. and he does, he stays in the alley even after he gets hurt, he stays even after he watches emizel die. and when emizel crawls over to him, dazed and hungry for blood, he doesnt run. he only runs after emizel tells him to. another really important thing about their relationship is the fact that they're both a constant in each others lives.

(episode 8)

its kind of like they sort people into two boxes: "theo/emizel" and "everyone else." and the other will always be their highest priority. emizel drives to the other side of la just to see theo. after emizel dies in the club, his first instinct is to go find theo. theo is the only person that the unseen one appears as to him. in episode 8, the first step to his plan is finding theo.

(episode 6)

even if he hadn't just lot a good amount of emotional connection to the rest of his friends, i think he would still be a lot more urgent to go save him. and again, his first thought is to check if theo is there. if theo's okay, if he's safe.

(episode 5)

and theo does this too. he insists that emizel is his only friend, the only one he trusts. speaking of trust, that is the most crucial aspect to their relationship. they trust eachother a sickening amount, they regularly put their life in the others hands. when emizel drinks theos blood, its not "is he going to hurt me?" its "how can i make this the safest?" because theo trusts emizel not to hurt him, even after knowing he's killed ~12 people.

(episode 3)

and here, emizel trusts that theo loves him enough to be okay with this. note that arthur doesn't even bring up love, emizel is the first to. arthur only brings it up after emizel says that. because emizel knows that theo loves him and trusts him, emizel knows that theo would do anything for him.

(episode 9)

and emizel, notorious for not letting anyone close enough to hurt him, tells theo that if he wants to, not needs, wants, he can kill him. that theo can kill him, if he wants. because emizel doesn't fully trust himself alone, but he trusts himself when he's with theo.

and theo trusts emizel too. despite seeing what vampires can do in a frenzy, he trusts that emizel wouldn't hurt him, just as emizel trusts that theo would stop him before anything could ever happen. and emizel is a notorious liar, so we can assume that he doesn't/wouldn't lie to theo, which would explain why theo trusts him so much.

basically, they'll always be there for eachother and theo would do anything for emizel and emizel will always come back to theo in the end and they love eachother and despite everything they are together. theyre completely inseperable.

tl;dr: emizels main MOTIVATION is status, while the most IMPORTANT thing to him is theo

#jrwi #the suckening #emizel tucker #theo collins #fizzfangs

[dribs-and-drabbles]

Let's talk about... Mhok's Fart Proudly t-shirt

Let's be honest here, this IS a ridiculous shirt. But it is just so Director Aof to put one of his characters in such a ridiculous shirt during a poignant scene.

This is Baseball Mom 2.0

And I say that not only because it's ridiculous but because, just like Baseball Mom, it also has a deeper meaning connected to the narrative - as is Aof's style - and it's what I adore about his work, that he puts so much attention to detail into the characters' wardrobe.

But on to the shirt.

If we can get past the loudness of the "FART PROUDLY" we can see the rest of the text reads approximately as thus:

I believe a fart is a healthy, natural thing - and is nothing to be embarrassed about. I have pledged myself to changing society's attitude towards farts by showing that I am not afraid to release my farts freely - wherever, whenever - and without shame.

And yes, it's about farts BUT the underlying messages here are the parts I have highlighted.

Throughout ep 2, Mhok tries to encourage Day to get out of his room, to "open his eyes" to things, to remind him the rest of his body still 'works' ("Your hands are available" / "You can still hear"), to try things before dismissing them. He learns that Day is scared of how he is perceived by others and tells Aon there's nothing to be embarrassed about. He asks Day why he cares what people think...all the while knowing to some capacity what it's like to to be judged on face-value. And Mhok is able to let that judgement roll off him, it seems he's able to meet his challenges without shame.

After Mhok gets fired, he uses this confidence to spend time in the market blindfolded. He's not afraid to feel uncomfortable and vulnerable in order to understand Day and what he's experiencing. He proudly endeavours to navigate through the space and to eat without his sight regardless of what others may think of him. He feels the fear, but does it anyway. He has no qualms about doing more than necessary - after all he could have just walked away and not thought about Day again. But, as the wardrobe choices tell us as well, the best never rest. And Mhok is one of the best.

Day used to be "a guy with confidence", and Mhok is trying to give that back to him. The t-shirt also asks "Can I count on you, now, to stand behind me?" which, in the context of the farting, could be 'are you willing to endure my farts?' or 'will you join me in farting freely', but with Mhok and Day it's 'are you with me? Can you be brave enough to not be embarrassed? To say fuck it and live your life regardless of others?' and/or 'will you let me help and protect you?'.

Mhok cares a lot. Not about what others think of him - he had no hesitation to get naked and let people watch when Day asked ('do this and I'll forgive you' -> 'how brave are you? how brave can you be for me?') - but about Day and the other people in his life. And Day is also starting to care - he not only left his house to see Mhok but agreed to let a relative stranger take him to a very crowded and, having been shut in his room for a year, what must have been a very scary place. Which makes Day's t-shit in this scene equally fitting. "Capacity Intensive Care".

It may be small now - their care and affection for each other - but it will soon grow, even if they don't see it yet. But they'll both be getting "more care, more often, right where [they] live".

#last twilight #last twilight series #*shakes fist at aof* #look what you've made me do! #I'm back to analysing t-shirts slogans #but I will defend them all to my last breath #yes they're ridiculous but they are also RIDICULOUSLY BRILLIANT #I can't wait for more of them #edited to change a typo

[tossawary]

Regarding "The Hobbit" film trilogy, even if I ended up personally disliking and resenting how much time and focus the elf characters (and others) ended up taking away from the dwarves whom I think deserved more focus as rich internal characters (I know that studio pressures are a factor in that terrible love triangle and so on), I still... vaguely appreciate the effort to create and include named female characters like Tauriel, when the book is sadly lacking in them. I think she's fine, actually. Comparatively, there are many other elements in these adaptations that I think are much, MUCH worse.

But still, if you want to add female characters to this story, the obvious answer to me seems to be to just make half the Company into dwarf women? (With similarly fancy beards and other facial hair! Because I think that's fun.) It's just... so much easier?

Do NOT come at me with that "dwarf women are rare" bullshit. Unreliable narration. Logistically unlikely. Also, if you believe that "men are the warriors and craftsmen, the women stay at home" is how dwarf society strictly functions (boring, honestly, on top of being incredibly sexist), I could argue that the Battle of Azanulbizar and other struggles probably left a significant dent in this dwarf group's male population, leaving behind many widows and mothers without children to pick up the work. The battlefields have come to and TAKEN both Erebor and Moria from the dwarves. I see no good reason why dwarf women would not have equal investment in reclaiming their home and the gold. Many of the Company are not presented to be formally trained warriors, anyway.

Now, ideally, we could do way queerer stuff in terms of both romance and gender here, but we know cowards with veto powers would not let this happen. Still, I feel like basic genderbending would have been a very doable move and is, actually, a very reasonable ask of an adaptation that would have added some depth to the story even if you didn't acknowledge the change at all.

Like, preferably, this would be an adaptational change that would be directly addressed. Maybe all of the Company appear male at first due to traveling that way (and assumptions made by humans and hobbits), then Bilbo might learn that some of the Company are dwarf women when he becomes closer to all of them. We could have a brief scene acknowledging that dwarf women are fighting these battles for their pasts and their futures too. It doesn't have to be a big thing! They can just be there. Existing. Participating.

I even think it would be fun if two of the dwarves were actually an older married couple traveling together, instead of brothers or cousins, because loving married bickering and battle couples are fun. You can have running jokes in the background about how Smaug's invasion ruined their wedding day, and going back and forth with "you never take me anywhere nice" @ each other whenever they're stuck in Goblintown or the Mirkwood dungeons. (I like seeing good marriages & partnerships in fiction and established couples going on fantasy quests together. I just think it's neat.)

But another (sillier) direction is that you could just cast some actresses in beards to play some of the dwarves, then leave the fact that some of these characters are probably dwarf women (traveling as men) as a fun detail for the audience. Bilbo is either too oblivious to notice or much too polite to bring it up at all. It's canonically compliant to the text this way!

Now, obviously some few people would have complained that Tolkien's work was being ruined by "political correctness", but they complained anyway about Tauriel (when there are MANY other bad choices in these movies), and what worthwhile arguments could they have possibly made against genderbending some of the THIRTEEN dwarves? Like, most casual fans I know cannot NAME the entire Company, who get so little character development in the book that the films had to come up with unique designs and backgrounds for most of them anyway. Bro (directed towards someone objecting to the idea of including female dwarves), be real, there's no way that you honestly cared this much about "Nori the Dwarf" before right now.

#tossawary tolkien #long post

[gayfandomnerd225]

There’s something deep inside of me that so badly wants to make a Dead Poets Society show. It would still take place in 1959, that wouldn’t change. The main changes would be the Knox/Chris thing. Mainly him sexually assaulting her (if you’ve read the book, you know), it could be changed to him getting drunk and talking about wanting to date Chris, and then Chet overhears, and things continue like the original. Charlie wouldn’t have the Nuwanda thing, I know some people like it but like, it’s racist, and there are other ways to show him rejecting society than the way he did. It would also put more emphasis on the struggle that Neil had, and maybe possibly make Anderperry canon, or deeply hinted at (I wouldn’t wanna push anything cuz it’s still 1959). Todd wouldn’t be directly stated to be autistic because the medical community didn’t really believe autism was a thing then, but it would also be deeply hinted at.

There could also be episodes dedicated to each individual member of the Dead Poets. I feel Meeks and Pitts are underrated and we don’t know much about them. It would be cool to have episodes dedicated to them all, learn more about their internal struggles (if they have any) and their family situations, maybe meet Todd’s brother, stuff like that. I also think it would be interesting to learn more about Cameron, possibly even why he ratted out on Keating.

This is just an idea that’s deep inside my head and won’t leave. Too bad I’m an 18 year old with no experience in television and can’t do anything about this idea. But now it’s out in the world, so that’s something

#dead poets fandom #dead poets headcanons #dead poets society #dps #dps headcanons #dps boys #dps fandom #todd and neil #neil perry #autistic todd anderson #todd anderson #charlie dalton #steven meeks #stephen meeks #gerard pitts #richard cameron

[what-even-is-thiss]

could you share your thoughts on Christianity and the lgbt community? Not in a like "'oh yeah well how are you this and that if you're REALLY Christian"' kind of way, I'm asking from the perspective of someone who's been struggling with their spirituality because I don't know how I can believe and god and also be gay. Feel free not to answer this though, you shouldn't have to explain yourself to random people every time you mention your religion

There’s not a lot of mentions of what we would consider to be homosexuality in the Bible. Paul mentions it most explicitly but there’s some important things to remember about Paul. First, he’s just some guy. He did important work spreading the religion but that doesn’t mean that he’s right about everything. Second, his only exposure to homosexuality likely came from the Roman elite. And the way they did it usually involved raping slave boys and hiring young prostitutes. They didn’t usually have same sex relations in the way we think of them now. Men didn’t generally have romantic relationships with each other into adulthood and a full adult citizen being passive during sex was considered to be scandalous. Any actual romantic relationships between adults of the same sex were likely kept secret or at least weren’t talked about loudly. So Paul is living in this environment. And people aren’t completely separate from the environments they live in.

For the most part stuff in the Bible that’s translated as condemning homosexuality is referring to certain cultural practices common in the Mediterranean at the time that we also wouldn’t like today. Such as pederasty, also known as a romanticized form of pedophilia that even people at the time in cultures that practiced it heavily criticized. Consenting adults often did have romantic or sexual relations together but they weren’t commonly open about it.

Overall, the Bible just doesn’t have much to say about liking someone of the same gender if you look at instances outside of things alluding to some of the worse stuff the Greeks and Romans did. So if the Bible doesn’t say much about it, that leaves it up to us to logically deduce our personal feelings about it.

Okay. So what are the two main commandments Jesus gives us? Love your neighbor as yourself, and love god with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Basically: love God, love others, love yourself. These are said to be the rules that all other commandments stem from and supersede all other commandments in terms of importance.

So. Does being queer stop you from loving God? Loving others? Loving yourself?

Science is real. It helps us learn more and more about the universe God created all the time and science has proven time and time again that being queer isn’t a choice and that people are happier when they live more authentically.

God made you the way you are. You cannot control whether you’re queer or not. So it’s not a mistake in you that can be “fixed”. If humans were made in the image of God, you too are an image of God. So some tiny part of God, however small, looks like you. All of you. Including the queer parts.

So then. Are you loving God? Including the parts of God that are like you? Are you loving your fellow humans? Including your fellow lgbt humans? Are you doing your best to love yourself? Every part of yourself?

I don’t take the Bible fully literally. You can’t. It contradicts itself constantly. But even if you did, the world it was written for and the society that made the oral traditions it was based on no longer exist. At least not in the exact same way they once did. What the Bible does have in it is stories that can give us examples and have informed the formation of our culture as Christians. Christianity has changed a lot over the last 2,000 years. Many forms of it have come and gone. Ultimately it’s up to us as modern Christians what kind of world we want to be apart of and contribute to and what culture we want to make among ourselves. I can’t pretend to know the true nature of God but I do know that God inspires me to reduce suffering and speak up for injustice where I can.

Ultimately your interpretation is up to you. But I personally don’t see needless self flagellation over something you can’t control as an act of justice or love. Just a form of self torture that’s ultimately not adding much to the world. Adding some of your own happiness to the world in my opinion isn’t a problem.

If you want to know how being queer has affected my faith, I’ve never doubted for a second that being lgbt+ is fine. To be honest I’ve been more afraid of secular society not accepting me than God. God and I have wrestled before, but almost never over that. I am how I am and if God didn’t want me to be this way he probably wouldn’t have flipped the gay switch in my brain.

#roman said a thing #religion mention

[vegasandhishedgehog]

Seeing a lot of upset posts about how the show ended with Boston and feeling like something really went over a few heads. Do I also believe Boston deserved better? Yes. But let's be realistic in the way Jojo and Ninew approached this.

Boston and his promiscuity have been the target of harsh judgements from episode one. And the writers have stated that he has a moral code, it's just very different from others. I was never expecting him to state it outright, that it would just be a thing worth paragraphs of speculative meta, but he does!

Boston stated his definition of boyfriend. If he wants to be exclusive, that's for all the emotional bonding that he desires with someone special, but does not deny him the ability to fulfill his physical desires with whomever he wishes. That's not just polyamory, it's a very specific kind!!! And it's entirely different from the traditional sort of relationship society has accepted. The thing is, he wouldn't have discovered that possibility without knowing Nick.

Boston did genuinely fall for Nick. But how could he have handled that properly when he has no experience being loved and has never learned how to love someone back? Moreover, how could he come to the conclusion that he likes being exclusive in one way but not another without absolutely fumbling the bag with someone who's on a different page? It's not exactly Nick's fault that he prefers physical affection to be exclusive as well, that's just how he is. There couldn't have been any discussion about this, it was a discovery in the making.

The truth is Boston would still have a hard time finding happiness in Thailand due to the political climate, especially with his father being a politician. He's gay and that alone makes achieving his dreams more difficult, but being as promiscuous as he is means even a majority of the queer community will shut him out. He's better off moving to the states where at least he has rights and better acceptance for who he is. And that's what happened.

Because having a sexual or romantic appetite outside of monogamy is still looked down on. I still see it in the BL fandom. I see it just in general. 3 Will Be Free is so often cited as a must-watch, but how many people stick to their comfort branded pairings?* How many people have made or heard jokes about the "Seattle polycule"? How many romantic aces and allosexual aros get othered and excluded and judged for their identity?

Jojo said there was no intended message, but that doesn't mean there isn't one to be found. Boston's arc is a prime example of how slutty queers get treated even by their own peers, even by people who care about them most. It's a cry from the cold and lonely dark that if we think these people deserve better, we need to change existing paradigms and find how we can give them that!

Nick wasn't prepared to do that because he is still hurting, and that's also okay. Not everyone has to change themselves to make the puzzle pieces fit. Boston and Nick's story centers around that so much. Nick being jealous and trying to copy Top, Boston trying to be what he thinks a boyfriend is - they only hurt each other because the parts that don't fit are digging in.

I hope we get a second season, but if not friends, remember Boston. He represents such a particular demographic that gets hated on and ignored constantly, and they deserve a chance. They're not easy, but that doesn't mean they're not worth it. Remember Nick too. We all have a Nick in some manner - someone that made us want to try, but no matter how much we cared for each other it just wasn't going to work. Family, friends, partners, whoever.

Instead of being outraged with the show, be outraged with society. Do something about it. Be kinder. Community is important, now more than ever. I cannot possibly overstate how much we need community, especially among minorities.

*this isn't meant to be judgmental toward fans who prefer branded pairings or aren't interested in that particular show. I know watching anything requires time and energy and scratching a certain itch at the right moment. It is, however, a concern that so many fans complained about numerous aspects of OF to the point where the creators went to the effort of explaining themselves on a weekly basis and editing certain parts to avoid backlash. I mentioned 3 Will Be Free because it's another example of Jojo's work. Many BL fans have heard of it, but only a small portion seem to have watched, and that can be an indicator of certain biases. This is not to imply anyone who hasn't seen it has said biases and is only intended to encourage reflection if needed.

#boston only friends #nick only friends #bostonnick #boston x nick #only friends the series #only friends #ofts #jojo tichakorn #neo trai #mark pakin #neomark

[fumifooms]

With what we know of Chilchuck's daufhter's personalities; Who do you think would each daughter get along with best among their father's party members?

Alright so we got 4 options: Laios, Marcille, Senshi and Izutsumi.

Meijack

Immediately I think for Meijack it’d be Senshi. Yes yes, very ironic since she’s the only one not after his heart lol.

A lot of people consider her to be Chilchuck 2.0 but I don’t think that’s really true, she takes after her father in conscientiousness and profession yes, is the most serious and reserved of the daughters, but that’s the thing— I flip flop a bit on wether I think Chilchuck is an extrovert, introvert or just ambivert, he loves hanging out with people, but it’s distrust from past professional experiences plus boundaries due to drastic personal events that push him to avoid being open, especially since we see how cheery he used to be. With Meijack though… She’s an introvert, that’s it. She looks so so tired lmao. Chilchuck says it himself that she’s brusque/not personable. Obvi she might also have trauma that push her to be this and that way, but from what we see I think she’s just genuinely the type to stick to her business, be quiet and stick to her corner.

So why Senshi then? I think she’d gravitate towards him because he has the least overwhelming energy, Senshi can get fired up but mostly he tends to be laidback and gentle. While the others would be talking and arguing, Meijack would be sitting besides Senshi and helping him cook or tend to the fire, working in companiable silence. And if they do talk, I think they’d have nice conversations, Senshi giving life advice that affect her somewhat. Having a stable work and future is very important to Chilchuck and I’m sure he drilled that into his daughters as best as he could, so seeing Senshi thrive, the very opposite of a working responsible adult with a secure lifestyle aka an hermit hunting alone on the fringes of society, would be a wtf moment. If nothing else she’d be intrigued I think. I wasn’t even thinking of that but I do feel like she has daddy issues, if I had to write for her her arc would prob center on that, so in that way yay her getting a second, very different and uplifting father figure! 🎉 Senshi would be nothing but warm and happy to take her under his wing and chat, and much like with Chilchuck in the traps chapter would like learning a thing or two from her too.

Honorable mention to Izutsumi! I don’t think they’d hit it off which is why I didn’t pick her, but I think the people making fics about her and Izu interacting have the right idea, they’d clash at first I think especially on Izutsumi’s side since she’d see Meijack as a stick in the mud, and Meijack wouldn’t have a favorable impression either esp with how rude and irresponsible she is, but… I 100% believe that if they spent times together and got used to each other, to the point that Meijack understands Izutsumi somewhat and Izutsumi stops being prickly with her, that they’d develop an unlikely but strong companionship. Meijack’s section is already long so I’ll stop here but yes Meizu brotp

Flertom

Marcille. Next-

Ok jkjk, but also yeah I feel like this one is pretty self-evident. They share the same sort of emotive demeanor and social values, they both seemingly love gossips and romance, and most of all Flertom is very social. We see with her panel at her workplace, the tavern, that she cheerfully talks with customers, this girl is a social butterfly who loves talking and making new acquaintances. She values her family a lot as shown by her taking in her mom and sending her dad a letter alongside a gift, so they could even bond over having a broken off family or over trying to solve others’ problems hah. They’d have a grand old time getting to know each other and swapping stories (maybe even about her dad specifically) and I could totally see them starting to exchange letters even.

Honestly without reaching, the only thing I could see them arguing over is if Fler has a competitive streak, or if she’d think Marcille too uppity/academic on some occasions, but even then I think she’d appreciate Marcille’s elven princess flair and they’d both be too emotive to bottle shit up and let bad blood brew between them, althouuugh yeah they could totally give each other the silent treatment after arguing for a while hah. Chilchuck doesn’t help them reconcile, but he does tease both of them about it. They reach out to each other soon after and apologize, and laugh it off. "Haha my parents taught me what happens if you don’t communicate and aren’t willing to self-reflect and apologize haha" … Me just now realizing that maybe this is how Marcille can get the details on the wife situation and the family dynamics, tho idk at which point, on one hand I could see Flertom being pretty flippant over it but on the other I can imagine it’d be a very personal and sensitive topic. Who knows if she’s had friends to vent to about the stress of the divorce- oh pardon, "separation"— But I do think she’s the kind that it’d really help to talk it out and vent, AND YET I do think with my family hcs that Flertom tended to take it on herself to help around the house and be an emotional support glue with her sisters and would notice the strained parts about her parents’ relationship so she’d have kinda grown being able to bottle her emotions up a bit… Okok I’m done, next fr this time.

Puckpatti

Ok imo she’s the hardest to pin down, and that’s a part of why she’s my fave. Because of her being optimistic and cheerful I tend to compare her to Marcille a lot, but beyond that they aren’t all that similar, even if Puck also is interested in romance like Fler. She has a bunch of stuff that’s implied, like her working in scams, but they’re all under like, layers of interpretation. She’s shown to be cheerful and allegedly careless, happy-go-lucky, a bit of a ditzy, and although Chilchuck isn’t necessarily an accurate judge of character about it even, what we’re shown with that is that she worked selling "dragon dung" for a while and it’s implied she switches jobs regularly. What Chilchuck’s saying about her being reckless and too optimistic is probably about her not having a stable career, reliable work & income. Before the new comic from the Complete Adventurer’s Bible that was all we could glean from personality wise, but now we can see she’s also direct, and she’s emotive though not as much as Flertom, and she’s quick to scheme, not oblivious at all and sharing a conspiratorial spark with her sister. I’d describe her as laidback, here for a good time not a long time, ambtious and self-driven, and doesn’t let obstacles scare her or keep her down. She’s like….. Is she like, a cheerful Mickbell. A little scamp.

… Ok what now. Honestly Laios and Izutsumi tie with each other in my heart. I think she’d enjoy conversations with Laios and would find him fun/entertaining to be around, would like when he gets excitable and fired up. Puck seems like she might try her shot to get romantically involved with him, but maybe while doing that she sees something in him that’s worth hanging around to even if for platonic reasons, but mostly I think they’d be like friendly acquaintances. I honestly personally don’t see Puck being all that into making deep friendships, I get the sense that her life’s a lot about herself and where she wants to go next, so friendships would also be oriented towards having a fun time and not as much like, deep emotional connections. But the Izutsumi angle… Izu is the cool rebellious older sister. Izutsumi’s brutish and unruly free spirit attitude have her enraptured. She wants to hang around her because Puck thinks she’s cool and lowkey admires her, and thinks she’s fun and a good influence to have around. Finally someone who Gets It, to go on shenanigan adventures with. I think Izutsumi would also be interested by her, in a big part because unlike her party members, Puckpatti would be interested in following her as she does her thing, encouraging her in whatever she does even, unlike Chilchuck Laios and Senshi who kept trying to instill in her values and lessons and looking after her so she doesn’t do something reckless. Izutsumi notices early on that Puck’s easy to have around, nice even, and from there on Puck couldn’t get rid of the cat that took a liking to her even if she tried. Izutsumi brings her dead birds and stuff like "Hey Patti look at this isn’t it rad!" and Puck is like absolutely, you rock. Oh maybe Puck would want to run some scams together tbh, because of her ninja/stealth skills or otherwise. Anyways yes devil-may-care troublemakers duo, the bane of Chilchuck’s existence.

Yeah I think Izutsumi is Chil’s fourth daughter and she should have a bond with all the daughters <3 Flertom’s the sis you go to if you need comfort, and she accepts Izu easily into their circle.

Between worrying about maybe his oldest and most serious thinking about courting Senshi (she’s not), Flertom teaming up with the nosiest and loudest friend he has and the duo of reckless agitators about to get in all kinds of trouble, Chilchuck is truly sandwiched by horror and agony.

#Ask #dungeon meshi #chilchuck’s family #Meijack #flertom #puckpatti #mayjack fullertom packpatty #Spoilers #When I say emotive I mean that they emote a lot. I hate english sorry #I think Meijack’s more like her mother just from vibes and the portrait. She got the tism….. #Character analysis #just a wild ton of extrapolation and speculation #Fumi rambles #as always hit up my chilchuck’s family masterpost to see my basis for the daughters #Fun ask!

[clueless-fan-critic]

Nimona: Just Now Got Onto The Hype for This Movie

After my first viewing, the movie Nimona was a thrilling, fun adventure with so much love and passion behind it that it makes you want to root for the bad guy and antiheroes once again. This makes you question what side you should support or not. And I love that it makes that kind of statement in the film.

Based on the novel of the same name written by ND Stevenson, they built a story about what it means to be a hero or villain, even going to lengths of what one’s true self is in the face of adversity. There’s also a bonus of a gay couple being at odds with each other like any couple in media.

If you want to watch the most human film of 2023 staring a pink-haired shapeshifter, then let’s get into the deep stuff.

Freedom and Freethinking

Nimona is the character that embodies someone who’s comfortable with who they are, at least on the outside. However, Nimona desperately wants to belong in a world that doesn’t want them to exist. This can mean lots of things, especially being an allegory for being nonbinary or transgender, thus not conforming to society’s rigid expectations.

Ballister Blackheart is the black sheep of the society he was placed into, the outsider that doesn’t feel like they could belong. He was essentially molded into a role meant to change the status quo and was later branded a villain by the kingdom. Sure, he was framed for murder, but he was greatly disliked and mistrusted before for not being of a “noble” bloodline.

Ambrosius Goldenloin is more portrayed as the man stuck between duty and love as he slowly unravels from the changes to the status quo. He still remains loyal because of his status as the direct descendent of the founder to the kingdom. He benefits from the system he resides in unlike Ballister and tries to find a middle ground to what he wants and what is right for the system.

All the people in the kingdom are influenced by their belief that monsters are evil and slaying them is the only option, as well as being affected by the fear of an unknown world beyond the walls. While the people aren’t evil, they aren’t innocent victims either. They still benefit and follow the life built within the walls of their kingdom without questioning anything

Transformation

Each character undergoes some sort of transformation, whether shapeshifting or through emotional growth. Some can be considered good for them and much needed, while other parts are very, very bad for a lot of people. Ballister internally transforms from a warrior to a friend to a monster that can empathize with Nimona’s feelings of isolation. You can even argue that Nimona’s shapeshifting is a representation of being genderfluid and changing their appearance to feel like they’re free.

The Director’s transformation is more negative if anything. She essentially allows her own fears of losing security get the best of her to the point of letting innocent people die than see any other solutions.

What it Means to Be Human

I loved that it doesn’t shy away from making strong commentary on how people make judgements and are motivated by their belief of being right. Around the climax, Nimona transforms into a giant shadowy monster after experiencing all of the pain she’s endured and nearly took her own life because she believed she was a monster. This was a powerful scene because we can understand feeling like no one will love or accept you, but there’s that small act of kindness that brings you back from that darkness.

Now...

Nimona is a modern classic that deeply explores identity and transformation within their characters in a rich environment and complex themes. This film makes the audience reflect on their own views on what they consider different while understanding self-acceptance and challenging societal norms. It’s a must-see for anyone who feels like an outsider and wants to learn about self-love and freedom from rigid ideas of identity. All I can say is that I’m emotionally exhausted from the rollercoaster of feels that I’ve felt.

#nimona #ballister x ambrosius #ballister blackheart #ambrosius goldenloin #nd stevenson #netflix #nimona movie #eugene lee yang #chloe grace moretz #riz ahmed

[gatorbites-imagines]

I love your Kryptonian hcs! I was wondering if you have any Martian hcs? I really love j'onn and itd be cool if you had any hcs!   

Martian Headcanons

I don’t have anywhere as many headcanons for Martians as I do kryptonians but I do have a couple, so here they are :)

I believe things like gender are completely different on Mars before Martian society was wiped out. Because of their ability to shapeshift things like gender were very loose, and they probably only really had one type of pronouns that everyone used, as physical appearance was just built on what you wanted to look like.

Martians didn’t have much of a spoken language because they all possessed something like telepathy, so they communicated mostly through that than they did with speech.

Martians mate/marry for life, so if their spouse/mate dies that’s it. They, like kryptonians to some extent, are able to sense when they’ve found their perfect match, though its through their telepathy and other mind powers, where kryptonians is more through their senses and a pull they feel for their other.

Any Martian is able to carry child, or impregnate someone else if they so please, thanks to their shapeshifting. Its typically the strongest of the two that carries the child, as they are able to be pregnant without fearing for their health or the child’s.

Martians don’t purr or make any noise in that regard, but they do something you could compare to two cats wrapping their tails together. With their telepathy they’ll hold onto each other to some extent, though its mainly with their minds so there’s always a connection.

Kissing on the lips is a human concept for the most parts, so Martians tend to press their foreheads together instead. This can be a platonic, familial, or romantic move, it all depends on what they are projecting with their mind when they do.

Martians are the best partners when it comes to communication in relationships, as they can sense if you are distressed and will find time to sit down and talk about it. Two Martians will communicate with their telepathy and have the issue solved quicker than we can keep up, but if you are a human or just not a telepath, they are good at talking too.

Because they are vulnerable to fire, Martians aren’t the biggest fan when it comes to heat, so they tend to like it colder. So, with a Martian lover you can expect to have to wear warm clothes in the winter or to sleep. Though, when your partner notices they’d turn up the heat for you. They wont die from it, they are just more comfortable in the cold, but seeing you comfortable is most important to them.

If you aren’t a Martian and are dating/mated to one, they might alter their appearance when you learn what your type is, because they want to be appealing and attractive to you. Youd have to sit them down and explain that, their appearance isn’t what’s important to you, and you love them as they are.

#J'onn J'onzz #dc #justice league #martian manhunter #dc imagine #dc headcanon #dc x male reader #dc x reader #justice league imagine #justice league headcanon #justice league x male reader #justice league x reader #martian manhunter imagine #martian manhunter headcanon #martian manhunter x male reader #martian manhunter x reader #jonn jonzz #jonn jonzz imagine #jonn jonz headcanon #jonn jonz x male reader #jonn jonz x reader #martian headcanon #martian imagine

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Hello!! I love your blog so much!

I wanted to ask you for whenever you get a chance, why do you think Hobie doesn't like Peter B? Do you think he knew about Peter B's relationship to Miles since before The Spider Society was created and was disappointed with him not defending Miles somehow? Or something else? I find it hella interesting that Hobie DID only have something to say about Peter B but not Miguel despite everything happening in that scene.

Thank you! 💖 Absolutely.

I feel like Hobie without a doubt knows everything about what happened. And he dislikes Peter B. because unlike Gwen - he doesn't have an excuse. And she does.

And that's why

Peter B. Parker is far more toxic of a person and a mentor to Gwen than Jess could EVER be. a.k.a Peter's influence on Gwen, his trust of Miguel, and 'Why was Jessica Gwen's mentor to begin with?'

[An analysis where I yell about the fact that Peter B. left Gwen homeless instead of opening his house to her. And how he didn't step up to be her mentor. And why Hobie Brown should hit him with a guitar.]

Am I saying that Jessica Drew is basically innocent. I might be. _____________________________________________

Peter B. Parker joined the society before Gwen, because we see him with Miguel when his daughter dies. Let's keep that in mind.

Gwen is adopted into the society as an emergency recruit - based solely on the fact that she's homeless. Had her father not shot at her, Miguel and Jess probably would've left her there with him, and she wouldn't have joined.

So, Gwen joined specifically to escape homelessness. She didn't know they didn't know about the Spider-verse and the Society's distaste for Miles until later.

Imagining what that must've been like for Gwen is wild.

I bet she was delighted to see Peter B. I bet her first thought was "Where's Miles? Peni's here, you're here, I'm here, Where's Miles?"

Peter and Miguel probably had to be the ones to tell her why Miles wasn't there. Peter probably had to help Miguel convince Gwen, otherwise, how else would get her SO on board? Who is she gonna believe more, Jess telling her Miles is a mistake -

or Peter telling Gwen Miles is a mistake?

And I imagine she'd be looking at Peter like '??? What do mean????? You know Miles, this Miguel dude doesn't. Peter wtf????'

Peter was probably a HUGE influence on Gwen staying in the society and accepting their propaganda around Miles. He was the only adult she knew in a strange futuristic society. Peter was probably smiling and happy to see her, and because she trusted him and he trusted Miguel - that probably fed into Gwen trusting Miguel.

So, One reason I think Hobie hates him is his loyalty to Miguel and that influence on Gwen.

Secondly, I think it's also that Hobie knows everything that has happened from beginning to end.

Hobie's first line to Miles - "This the yungun-" implies that Gwen has told him about Miles. And I'm assuming that also includes their first meeting - as well as the other Spider-people.

Gwen met Miles and Peter at the same time, and in telling Hobie this - he learns a lot about Peter B he didn't know before. Hobie met Peter B. through Miguel. Whether he knew Peter knew Miles personally before Gwen and told him - we don't know. But he knew Peter through the Society. And Gwen came later.

Before - Peter was probably just an annoying dad at HQ. But now, Hobie suddenly had context about him. Coming from someone he cares about - Gwen. Not only do Gwen and Peter know each other - but Peter ALSO knows Miles (the Original Anomoly on Campus) and he's not sticking up for EITHER of them?

I feel like as soon as Gwen told him about Peter knowing Miles - Hobie would hate his guts.

From Hobie's POV:

Gwen has an excuse. She didn't know about Miles until after she joined, she can't leave or else she'll be homeless, and the ONE adult she knows is completely 100% in Miguel's pocket.

I feel like Peter B. is soo much more dangerous and influential to Gwen than Jessica could ever be.

And the fact that he had months to step up and mentor her but just..didn't. That speaks volumes.

Sure, Gwen admires Jess. But Gwen knows Peter, she trusts him to be a person to fight for good, because they'd done it together before. She's scared, she's alone, and she's found one person she trusts. And he says to trust Miguel.

That would absolutely be more powerful than anything Jessica could possibly do or say in my opinion.

I feel like that's something that the fandom just ignores. Peter is there, all the time. Anytime Jess is pressuring Gwen - shouldn't he be the one to watch out for her?

But when he's yelling and throwing things at Gwen it's "Aww chill out Miguel - hold my baby, you're so uptight."

Dude. Defend her.

You can't tell me "Peter didn't know that Miguel yells at kids-" OH? So where was he when Miguel and Jessica where probably disciplining her for months. Gwen walks in expecting to be yelled at, so it's not like its a rare thing.

Peter knows Miguel yells at Gwen.

PETER LITERALLY COUL'DVE JUST HAD GWEN MOVE IN WITH HIM!!!! HE HAS A HOUSE!!!!!

But instead he let her be HOMELESS, and sleep at Hobie's house.

That's. Not okay. Peter entirely in the wrong on so many levels that Jessica isn't even in the picture anymore.

I think Hobie would HATE Peter's guts. Because he has had every chance to call Miguel out, to protect Gwen, to look out for her - hell, why isn't HE her official mentor? Why isn't he the one asking her for mission reports. Instead of passing it off to the pregnant black women she's known for less than six months?

Everyone is like "Oh, Jess is so mean. She treats Gwen so mean-"

She's doing her job. That's what she sees it as. If Gwen wanted comfort from an adult - she should have Peter there for her.

But he wasn't. He expected Jessica to do that for some reason. A pregnant woman who Gwen just met.

He could've housed her. But he didn't do that. He expected Hobie to do that.

Peter saw Gwen come in homeless, scared, and depressed. And what did he do - he didn't try to help her. He hold her to trust Miguel. An adult.

And then he walks around like father of the year with Mayday - when he can't even step up for Gwen OR Miles? Couldn't even offered her a bed, or actually tell Miguel to not raise his voice at a teenager.

He didn't. But hold the baby.

I'm surprised that Hobie ain't approach Peter like - "Gwen HAS to be here, you don't. Jess and Miguel don't know Miles. YOU DO. Why shouldn't I hit you with the guitar right now? Answer quickly."

You already know Hobie don't play that. He's being nice for Gwen's sake.

'Humbling Reality Spider-man' Indeed.

#FUCK Peter B Parker all my homies HATE Peter B. #Gwen deserves better #Spidernoir the superior PeterB #as usu no proofread yet #Hobie brown #peter b. parker #gwen stacy #miles morales #jessica drew #miguel ohara #miguel o'hara #miguel o hara #spiderman #spider man #spiderman 2099 #atsv #across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #spiderpunk #spider punk #spidergwen #spider gwen

[oldshrewsburyian]

what classic romances do you think measure up to harriet and peter in gaudy night? i’m really craving more satisfying classic romance

Well, kind inquirer, I have a confession. I had read the Wimsey novels multiple times by the age of 16. Over the past 2+ decades, Peter and Harriet have taught me a lot of things, even if I have learned them more slowly and painfully than I would like (Lord, teach us to take our hearts and look them in the face...); even if I feel as though I have not salvaged as much as I could from life's various shipwrecks. The point is: no one measures up, not for me. My dear, if you have let me come as far as your work and your life... That said, I can offer some suggestions, presuming that you mean by "classic romance" romance that happens outside the genre parameters of romance novels. I'll start with the most classic and work my way forwards. [Under the cut for length!]

Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë (for obvious reasons, I imagine. Perhaps the thing I love most in romance is two intense weirdos deciding to love each other intensely and weirdly.)

Much Ado About Nothing, Shakespeare (I know I said I'd work my way forward, but then I said 'intense weirdos' and remembered my beloved Benedick and Beatrice. Beatrice, an unmarried woman in her uncle's household, interrupts men's political conversation to demand to know whether he's alive because she can't stand not knowing for a minute longer... and that's her opening line! and then they roast each other for 2 hours! I love them so much!)

Persuasion, Jane Austen (Anne is, I would argue, quietly intense, while Frederick is obviously so; he's also weird enough for both of them (affectionate.) I adore them, I support them, I wish them many decades of shocking society with how they look at each other across rooms. And dinner tables. And pianos. And dancing squares.)

Artists in Crime/Death in a White Tie, Ngaio Marsh (this is the Alleyn/Troy duology the way that Strong Poison/Have His Carcase/Gaudy Night is the Peter/Harriet trilogy. I adore Troy, an anxious and compassionate artist with gnc tendencies, and Alleyn fascinates me. Intense weirdos again. Alleyn successfully pretends to be normal most of the time, with everyone except about 3 people. Occasionally he decides to stop, or just does because he's very tired and fed up, and then everyone in the room gets very freaked out very quickly. I love him.)

The Case of William Smith, Patricia Wentworth (bonus detective round! Wentworth is not in the Sayers-Marsh class, and this novel has some tropes I don't like, but I love the gentleness of the central romance so much that I still reread it.)

Possession, A.S. Byatt (Victorian poets, the scholars who study them, the life of the mind and the life of the heart. This is absolutely a novel with Gaudy Night in its lineage.)

The French Lieutenant's Woman, John Fowles (I hesitated before adding this to the list, but it's a novel of ideas that is also about love and sex and identity and Englishness with a very vivid setting, so it might fit the bill?)

The English Patient, Michael Ondaatje ('I believe this. When we meet those we fall in love with, there is an aspect of our spirit that is historian, a bit of a pedant, who imagines or remembers a meeting when the other had passed by innocently...')

Charlotte Gray, Sebastian Faulks (Birdsong is the greater novel, but this one might be the one I prefer. I love Charlotte and her quest to find herself that is also a journey toward love! and vocation! and the images for the lovers in this book are indelible)

Bonus round of books I looked at on my shelf and decided were about so many things that the romance might not be central enough: The Children's Book, Love in the Time of Cholera, The Remains of the Day, The Portrait of a Lady, War and Peace, Brideshead Revisited.

Bonus bonus round, not a book: Random Harvest. Yes it is a book, but in the novel, the romance which truly is emotionally anchoring (I would argue) is much more peripheral than it is in the film, which was, like the Wimsey novels, formative for me. Also, look at them:

I have not been normal about the way he looks at her for *checks notes* 25 years. And I hope you find some things to enjoy here!

#long post #book recommendations #romance #two fiddlers both musicians #charlotte brontë #jane austen #sebastian faulks #ngaio marsh #a.s. byatt #john fowles #michael ondaatje #patricia wentworth #random harvest

[c0zyrainfall]

I was thinking about it, and I started wondering what exactly is so appealing about damianya.

Twiyor is equally well written, I think, but I actually prefer the former (though I love both!). That's just because of preference and my appreciation for enemies to lovers. HOWEVER I have decided to draft up an analysis pinpointing why damianya is so enticing, because I write my own original material, and I think you can gain a lot of valuable insight by reverse engineering good writing.

First of all: What is the definition of a good romantic relationship?

I will use the following guidelines:

1) Based off of genuine friendship

2) Both are willing to sacrifice for the other and

3) Both parties make the other a better person.

The first guideline I outlined is big here. Because they are kids, they obviously should not be in a full on romantic relationship now. As a matter of fact, they will probably be waiting AT LEAST eight years. At least.

This means they have eight years to develop a true and wholesome friendship. A friendship with no romantic ulterior motives. They just get to enjoy being kids and growing up with one another. Because of this, they will see each other's high AND low points, rather than viewing the other with rose tinted lenses. Yes, maybe one of them (cough Damian) gets butterflies and feels flustered every time they see the other. But for now, it is very innocent and immature, a childish crush. By framing the goal for this relationship as FRIENDSHIP rather than ROMANCE, the two are able to develop a deeper understanding and a more complete picture of each other before they take anything to the next level.

Does the second point even need to be addressed? Anya is willing to take a tonitrus bolt for him. She is willing to stand up for him (well, technically for the "mission" but we'll get to that later). Damian is willing to take a hit for her, whether it be a dodgeball or a literal bomb. He gives her his share of the macaron (which he believes could help him with his intelligence.) He spends time he could be using to study to locate the finest teacakes in the world so he can give them to her.

Now to the third point.

When we first meet Damian, we don't like him. He is a classist jerk. So karma hits him (literally) in the form of Cupid's arrow. By developing a crush on Anya, he is learning that he should not treat others differently because they have less money. He becomes a better person by learning that "commoners" are the same as all the rich students at Eden.

Side tangent: while I relate more to Damian academic wise, aka pushing myself probably too far to get good grades, I'm sure we can all personally relate to Anya. She tries a lot of things. She fails at almost all of them. Thus, by seeing someone who is academically accomplished and rich be infatuated with her just for being herself, we start to realize that those things don't matter as much as we sometimes feel. Therefore, we want Damian to like her, because it is sweet. It is sweet that someone who places value on things like high academics is able to see past that and appreciate someone else for different good qualities, rather than the ones society deems most important. ~

When Anya first meets Damian, we cannot fault her for disliking him. He is rude to her because she is in a lower social class than him. She is rude to him because he is mean to her. This is perfectly reasonable. In the beginning, it would not make her a better person to be friends with him; as a matter of fact, avoiding him would probably be the high road in this situation. If I were her, I would not have wanted to be friends with him at all.

Side tangent 2:

If you like damianya, you are probably fond of Anya. And of Damian. This is true for me. He's my favorite sxf character. The reason WHY we are fond of him is because we know his backstory. We know he is actually a sweet little guy who just wants to be loved. So we also want him to succeed in his friendship with Anya.

However, though she may have picked up bits and pieces through her mind reading, Anya does not know this. And even if she did, she likely wouldn't understand the levity of it. She's only 4 or 5. ~

Damian and Anya have developed since they first met. They ARE friends (or close to it, anyways). So while at first it wouldn't have made Anya a better person to genuinely care about Damian, now it would.

Because we know Damian and care about him, we also want Anya to care about him. We want her to understand why he acts the way he does. We want her to understand that he actually cares about her.

While Damian is terrible at proving he cares through his words, he is really good at SHOWING her. If she understands he has a different method for showing care, Anya grows. She is able to develop a greater understanding of other people, rather than shaping the world through her own perspective. Framing Damian as the mission makes a lot of sense. She wants her parents to stay together and not get rid of her, and she wants world peace. Of course Anya is not bad for wanting these things. But she will be BETTER when she learns to see things from Damian's pov. She will see the world is not all black and white. She will see that he is not just a mission, and that he is actually as important to her as Yor is to Twilight.

So, conclusively, those are some reasons Damianya is a well written and popular ship. I could also go into detail about how it subverts expectations, likely has future plot relevance (in relation to the story as a whole rather than just a side plot), and is a generally unique and well executed idea. However, for now, I'll leave it at this. I tried to nail down the psychology of what makes it appealing to us, but if anyone has further insights, please feel free to let me know :) Hope you all have a great day

#if you read this whole thing you are a champion #me writing a whole on essay about this #instead of doing hw oops #guess I'll go do that now... #anyways this is my coping mechanism since #we probably have to wait another month or two for the next damianya chapter #spy x family #spy family #spy x family anya #anya forger #damianya #spy x family spoilers #spy x family manga #damian desmond

[deeplyridiculouslyinlove]

Ranking Wheel of Time Characters and their Narrative Arcs

I've been thinking about a post like this since probably book 8, so here we go. My ranking of the arcs of the major characters in the Wheel of Time book series, and separately my ranking of those actual characters (because they are not the same!!)

Arcs:

Nynaeve

I could say a literally never-ending amount of things about my darling Nynaeve. I think she has the most internal development of any character in the series, which makes her feel especially human to me. Getting to watch her learn that her anger is rooted in fear and a lack of control and to confront that was so powerful and it felt very real. Watching her grow from hating Moiraine to standing beside Moiraine at the end with Rand made me so emotional. And speaking of Rand, it was so nice to have one of the original Emonds Fielders with him in the later books to witness his descent--I think it added depth and believability both to her character and her position having cared for the younger ones when they were kids, and also really helped humanize Rand. While I tend to think Nynaeve's relationship with Lan is really random since they barely speak to each other when they fall over their skis in love with one another (apparently), by the end of the books I'd accepted it and it also made me emotional when she went behind Lan's back to find all the other Malkieris to ride into battle with him. I just feel really proud of Nynaeve and want the world for her and I'm glad that she was given a real growth arc the series.

2. Mat

So I grew from thinking Mat was a bit annoying and childish, to finding him fine as a character but listening to his chapters at 1.6 speed because I didn't care about carousing at inns or random bands of fighters, to having his chapters be my favorite. And I think that's because Mat really evolves throughout the series in a way that still feels very believable and true to the same person/character. He's is written so well as a character learning lessons while staying true to the core of who he was in the first book. I felt a lot of pride for Mat when he rescued Moiraine, and although I saw some chatter by folks on the internet that they'd be fine if the Daughter of the Nine Moons thing doesn't happen in the show, I actually really liked his relationship with Tuon because it was one of the few relationships we saw actually build and develop slowly. Despite being a fated relationship, they also spend time together and develop a rapport. It was a fated marriage not fated love, and I thought that worked much better than the fated loves of Rand’s polycule. I also liked that Mat and Tuan's relationship had some ambiguity until the end; although they clearly cared for one another, we never saw them come to really understand one another, which felt authentic to the situation they were in. Mat is also one of the very few men in these books who actually recognizes that there are things he doesn't know and doesn't need to be involved in, and I appreciate that from a male character in what ultimately remains a pretty patriarchal world despite RJ's structural changes to society (I can back up this statement about patriarchy, but that is a whole separate post). I think this is likely at least in part because Mat doesn't engage with the Power, which is the part of the books that most upholds patriarchal stereotypes and values. Now I'm rambling about Mat more than his arc, but I think he both has a lot of depth and grows internally in significant ways and I really appreciate it!

3. Aviendha

I love Aviendha as a character, and I think her arc is another really good example of slow internal growth. We see get to see her go from Maiden to Wise One to the person who discovers the new message hidden in Rhuidian and what that means for her entire people. We see her struggle with what it means to have left the Waste and what she feels is right for the future. And all of this without that many point-of-view chapters compared to other characters! Aviendha's relationship with Rand also feels the most authentic to me of any of his three women. We actually get to see their dynamic build and see them spending time together, it’s not just like “oh I’m fated to love him!” They also spend time apart and Aviendha doesn't spend that time pining over him, but rather focused on her own goals and the bigger picture. From the narrative, I get why they like each other and also why they are a good match for each other. I don't love her getting injured in the way she does at the Last Battle because I'm not really sure what purpose it serves (I guess it's the ultimate sacrifice for an Aiel to not be able to walk or fight?), but if my biggest qualm with her arc is only at the very end, I'll still rank it quite high.

4. Egwene

When I started reading the books and talking to friends about the gender dynamics in them and the female characters, so many of them mentioned how Egwene gets one of the best arcs in the series. And while I don't disagree with that (I have her ranked in the top 5 still!), I think the fact that Egwene is not a ta'veren in the series really hurts her arc in the later books. Once she's Amyrlin, and particularly once she goes back to the tower as Amyrlin, I feel like she starts to get plot armor that detracts from her actual development. All she has to do is talk and people are completely swayed to her side in a way that I think sort of stunts her internal growth. I loved her time with the Wise Ones in the Waste and with the Aiel and I think it really showcased her eagerness and dedication in a way I related to, and it made her growth in Tel'aran'rhiod and becoming the Amyrlin feel really deserved. Her ending was tragic and powerful and somehow it both doesn't feel like what she deserved but also feels like it lives up to Egwene and I feel really conflicted about it!! I'm was very meh on the Gawyn stuff, since I don't think it really added anything and he's a bit of a downer of a character--honestly, Egwene is the character in the books I most wish had just not had to have a romantic relationship. That said, unlike a lot of other relationships in the seires, we at least see Egwene's feelings for Gawyn develop over time in the dream world so it wasn't as frustrating for me as some other characters' romantic arcs.

5. Rand

For me Rand's and Egwene's arcs are really really close in terms of how much I like them, but I think there are things missing in the execution of Rand's arc that make it a bit lower for me--had it been done slightly better (from my perspective) I think it would have edged out Egwene. I really *want* to empathize with Rand starting around book 11 when his PTSD and the weight of everything else he’s carrying really starts to impact him. But because he spent the first five books whining about how everyone is trying to use him as a puppet (and particularly suspecting literally any woman with power before he had been given any reason to do so), his later arc doesn’t lead well into him then being someone you’re supposed to empathize with in my opinion. Particularly because his whole arc in the later books is about love and compassion, but I don't feel like we get that from him in the early books? I find it very confusing. I think for that progression to work we really needed a part of his arc where trusting and/or showing compassion to someone leads to serious harm, then he turns hard, and then he remembers the need for compassion. Maybe I’ve just forgotten it but I really can’t think of anything at all like that first step in the books? He distrusts the people who eventually hurt him? And things generally work out for him, even though he’s struggling internally? Anyway, this rating is higher than it otherwise would be because of how much I *want* it to work because having a chosen one who so clearly struggles with the weight that destiny places on him is interesting and the madness angle is also interesting to me. Oh also, I think Rand should have actually died at the end and that not doing so makes his arc more boring, sorryyyyy.

6. Faile

Faile is another character I really wanted more for. I hated the weird dynamics in her relationship with Perrin, but I could have liked them together without the physical abuse and if the power dynamics had felt more consensual and didn't have this whole element of her expecting Perrin to behave towards her in a way that he clearly didn't want to. Her being the lady to his lord was cute! I also liked Faile's progression from being a Hunter of the Horn to guarding the horn at the end. I like how self suffiicient she was and how she was able to find a way to combine what she was born for/raised for and what her parents wanted for her (being a noblewoman) with what she wanted (adventure and love).

7. Perrin

I have very few real issues with Perrin's arc and I’m sure other people liked it a lot. My ranking it relatively low is much more that it bored me and I left the series unsure of what it was trying to say than it being a bad arc or doing Perrin a disservice. I hated Perrin's relationship with Faile, and I hated that I hated it because (as discussed above) I think it had a lot of potential. Like Mat, I appreciated that Perrin did not think he needed to be involved in everything nor that he was always right, and I found his growth from boy to man quite believable and that it took place over the course of the books in a way that was well-constructed. I found the whole question of hammer vs axe and his contemplation of the Way of the Leaf to be really interesting! But I'm not sure I fully grasped the resolution of that debate and what the entire focus on it in the narrative was trying to say. And I feel the same about his struggle with the wolf side of him. Is the point just that violence is sometimes needed? And/or that it eats us up from inside? (But also that we have to accept that?)

8. Elayne

I want to do my best to separate Elayne from her arc, since I personally don't love her character for reasons purely of personal preference. I think the reasons her arc specifically is lower for me is that I feel like we don't get to see her growing into being a queen, since one of her primary character traits is that she is already so royal when they all meet her. I think the decision to have her win her crown in Caemlyn with a battle where they just snuck up behind the other forces was a weak one -- why couldn't they have defeated these people before if it was that easy? I also don't love that she gets no time to like learn how to be a queen before she is more focused on becoming a mother. The whole pregnancy arc doesn't sit quite right with me. She sleeps with Rand literally once and it's basically just to get pregnant? But this just builds off of what I dislike about how she just decides she's in love with Rand one day because she is fated to be. Give me the scene where they bond over war strategy and thinking like rulers like six books earlier instead of in the last book! It also seems like there's no reason she and Aviendha couldn't have become friends before realizing they both liked Rand instead of because they are forced into proximity by that fact, and I also feel like she and Rand should have spent actual time together before falling for each other--to my mind the way her part of the polycule goes down weakens Elayne's relationships with both Aviendha and Rand, which otherwise could have been interesting.

9. Moiraine

I have far too much to say about my baby Moiraine. I'm including New Spring in these arcs, and reading that made me want to reread the whole series in a new light. I love her. I love her I love her I love her. And to me New Spring makes her arc in the main series both more powerful and more tragic. Seeing in New Spring just how determined she is and also how much self-doubt she carries and how much her Aes Sedai serenity of the later books is disguising inner turmoil is so rewarding. I wish we had gotten to see so so much more of it. I know that she has to be mysterious to our main characters, but I don't think she has to be mysterious to the readers, particularly once we are more than a few books into a fourteen book series. To that end, I know why she had to go away (she is the Merlin character after all!), but I wish she had come back a few book sooner and we could have seen literally any interiority about reckoning with her time in the Tower of Ghenjei. The Moiraine in New Spring would have been going CRAZY both leading up to knowing she had to go through that archway and while stuck in the tower--even if she was being tortured, which she also would have withstood for a while. The fact that she couldn't take action that it was such a passive way of supporting Rand and his mission would have killed her, but also she would have been so very resolute, and I wish we could have seen that more. Instead, she just like shows up right before the last battle, speaks her piece, goes to help Rand (presumably thinking she's going to die??), and we see none of it from her POV! She never sees Siuan again and because we can't see into her mind that's just like...chill?? And obviously I hate the book pairing her with Thom, particularly her *offering to give up her abilities* for him. I see what it adds for his character arc, but what does it add for hers? Plus there is literally no reason to remove her powers and give her that powerful ter'angreal instead. That's just RJ's obsession with disempowering women and I despise it.

10. Siuan

Oh Siuan. My other baby Siuan. I'm only ranking her arc this high because I think it had a lot of potential to be telling an interesting story, but I think her ending was so horrible I can barely think about it. There was so much potential here to be telling a story about how you can have power and influence and be important even if you are less powerful and that the strength to manipulate and steamroll people is not the only way to make a difference, but I feel like this would have been a much more interesting message if she was the only (or one of the few) powerful women to get knocked down like this rather than it happening to literally every woman with power at the beginning of the series in one way or another. I particularly hated that with Siuan they did this knocking her down a peg in a way that made her younger and pretty for an old man (when she was only like 40 in the first place I might add!)--and she also started acting younger in a way that felt strange. I liked her teaching Egwene, but why couldn't she have some of the teacher vibes Moiraine did? And the way she dies with no one noticing or caring and it making basically no difference to the plot is so horrible. And, I'm sorry, it's not what the character deserved. Nor was it in line with the message I thought her arc was trying to send about the ability to have an impact no matter how unpowerful in traditional ways. And it happens because she doesn't stay with a man?!?! No one even knows she mattered after she was deposed and it’s all so unfair.

11. Lan

I feel like Lan doesn't really grow that much as a character since he spends the entire series basically just expecting to die in various ways at different times. Even with New Spring I don't feel like we get a good sense of what his character is meant to be doing besides impacting other characters in the series. I am not against his relationship with Nynaeve, but I don't think the books flesh it out very well. And I'm still mad he ends the series mad at Moiraine--where is their New Spring dynamic of him vibing with her even when he's annoyed with her? Obviously his leading the Malkieri into the blight really hit me in the feels and was a great culmination of his plight, however, which is why I still think the arc deserves an honorable mention.

12. Thom

Thom's arc is basically just from hating Aes Sedai to marrying Moiraine, and getting continually paired with weirdly young women. I guess he learns to overcome prejudice based on his nephew's death? I do like the role he plays with Rand and Mat and their respective character development as they grow up from the Two Rivers to adventurers, but I'm not sure that's really his arc or development. But for that I'm giving him a higher ranking than his Moiraine arc alone deserves.

13. Tuan

I don't think think Tuan gets that much of an arc. While she becomes Empress, she doesn't seem to grow or change her mind on things during the series, and mostly she puts aside things she doesn't like very much with intentions of dealing with them later. BUT I like how her and Mat challenge each other and engage with each other, and I think the internal growth is somewhat implied or is something that would have happened if we had had more time with her. I wish the entire Seanchan plot was more resolved at series end, but that's not specific to Tuan.

14. Loial

This may be controversial, but I don't like Loial's arc very much! I don't think he needed to get married! I'm glad he seems happy about it in the end, but it feels unnecessary. I loved him adventuring and writing his book and being sort of childlike in a really endearing way, but everything with his mom and with Erith took him out of the story for a long time and seemed to be sending the message that ultimately everyone wants to settle down. Let him explore and write his book and be a late bloomer! Idk.

15. Min

I am ranking Min even below the characters that only have a fraction of an arc because I loved Min so much in the earlier books and I hate the way the series treated her subsequently. When we first meet her she is determined to be fully herself, despite a talent that makes her stand out and a personality inclined against confrontation. She's brave and interesting! I hated watching her become more ladylike for Rand, and for a while essentially being absolutely nothing more than a lover and comfort for Rand. I really wish we had had more lingering payoff for the many books that Min was reading and trying to parse out what the prophecies meant, but it felt like Cadsuane was basically like "yes I agree" and then...it was no longer about Min having figured it out?

And just for fun, here would be my list of these same characters from ones I like most to ones I like least (although I like them all tbh!!)

Characters:

Moiraine (main trilogy + new spring)

Nynaeve

Egwene

Moiraine (main trilogy only)

Aviendha

Mat

Siuan (main trilogy AND main trilogy + new spring)

Loial

Rand

Lan (main trilogy + new spring)

Perrin

Lan (main trilogy only)

Faile

Elayne

Tuan

Thom

#no one asked for this but here we are! #sorry if your fave isn't here I literally just picked the people I thought had significant character arcs #plus a few folks we spent a lot of time with so it felt necessary I guess #I feel like I got grumpy in a lot of my reviews but I actually really like the characters and putting them in order was really hard!! #I just wished for more for many of them because they deserved better #narratively speaking #wot book spoilers #wheel of time

[pumpkzsafeplace]

bear and babbles 🧸ྀི⋆˚✿˖°

welcome to the second episode of bear and babbles!! last week went really well, so we're excited to continue & help as much as we can hehe! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა.

key code │ 🧸 - daddy │ 🍼 - pumpkin.

what is bear & babbles!

bear & babbles is a cute thing that we decided to create to help talk about agere in a safe environment! we will be answering questions (both me & daddy!) and answering some emails!!

i think it'll be fun to see both point of views too, from a little (and someone who struggles with mental health) + a caregiver whose been in the role for a while now.

all emails & messages will be addressed anonymously, please don't include real names!

today's topic: triggering topics

i decided to dedicate this weeks epsisode on dealing with trigger topics given what this month means to a lot of people & although it's important to talk about a lot of things, it still can be heard to deal with <3

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

🍼 : for me, i find it sometimes difficult dealing with triggering topics as 9/10 the triggering will happen when i least expect it. i've dealt with so much in my life, that i think i forget sometimes that i'm not some emotionless human- and that things do affect me.

for me personally, i've found that it's harder to deal with the emotional side of being triggered rather than the triggered epsiode itself. i always end up feeling guilty and embarrased for reacting the way i did, like it's a moment of weakness and vulnerability i don't want anyone to see- like it makes me less of a person.

when that isn't the case.

i think the more i've tried to work on myself, i try to see my triggered epsiodes as more as a shout for for help rather than an embarrasing moment. & when that happens, i do my best to comfort and console the part of me that never recieved that love when the incidents occured (if that makes sense).

triggering will happen, especially when you're healing from things other people don't know about. but i think as a society, we've gotten better at accepting each others limits, and knowing how to comfort or even appologise when it goes too far.

but if you're struggling to calm down during an epsiode, here are things i do to help.

🠲 distract yourself : whether that be by music, by youtube, by asmr videos - distract yourself with something you love, something you care about (no sad, depressing playlists!)

🠲 reach out if you need to : you don't even have to talk about it if you're not comfortable, but instead you could suggest watching a movie with someone, going out for a walk, little things to help take your mind off it.

🠲 comfort & console : remind yourself that you will heal from this fully, and you will get better. it doesn't make you weak that you got upset. you're allowed to grieve & hurt, that doesn't make you any less of a fighter or any weaker!

also know that i believe in you, you will always have someone fighting in your corner <3.

🧸 : When it comes to triggering topics, you have to approach people with the triggers in mind. it's easy to believe that something is not a big deal for you, when in reality it could be a massive deal to somebody else.

The person in question may appraoch their struggles differently, even joke about their trauma- but that doesn't mean that they're not still stuggling with it, or will not still be affected by certain jokes/topics.

It's important to approach senstive topics in a way that makes them comfortable, and sometimes that may be in different ways that you think. i.e, texting instead of speaking, telling things vageuly instead of to the point.

As long as you're willing to listen and adapt you should be okay, and for those who are suffering- just know that there are people around that care about you, they might put their foot in their mouth sometimes when it comes to certain things, but they care, they're just learning too :).

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

i hoped this helped anyone who needed it !! <3

if you want to send an email for us to respond to, or if you have any quick fire questions you wanted answered more in depth, leave a comment or send an email using the address below!!

(tee_bee_bambi(@)hotmail.com)

gif isn't mine

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