#I can rly only do one thing well at a time

[honeytonedhottie]

maintaining/creating a social life⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🧁

ok so i used to have HORRIBLE social anxiety and i think that the contrast between me with social anxiety and me now is INSANE. in a good way ofc. so im not going to talk about how i overcame social anxiety, instead im going to talk about how i created a social life ✨

MAKING FRIENDS ;

the science of making friends is simple and im about to explain it. so go to where there are ppl that u can relate to/want to relate to. example being school, clubs, etc.

next, observe who u want to befriend and make sure to start with a compliment. starting off by introducing urself just makes for an awkward conversation but starting with a compliment puts u and the other party at ease.

something thats rly important is ur CHARISMA and ur magnetic energy so be CHARMING ✨ if u find that the other party is not reciprocating its either they're uncomfy, uninterested, or just a weirdo. and in all cases, you should stop.

MAKING FRIENDS THRU FRIENDS ;

make friends with your friends friends -> make friends with their friends -> and so on and so forth. this is how you network and create a friendly status with lots of people.

if ur in a school setting like i am, make friends with people in ur own grade or in a higher up grade, i dont usually make friends with ppl in lower grades but ofc there are always exceptions.

making friends through friends is how u get invited to parties, have more opportunities be available to you, and ofc network for more connections. guys connections are literally EVERYTHING.

MAKE TIME FOR UR FRIENDS ;

make sure to learn who u call friends. when is their birthday? do they have specific preferences? what kind of music do they listen to? knowing ur friends makes them feel special and thats how u learn to be a good friend. i can make a whole POST about being a good friend cuz i've learned and grown so much with that.

THE POWER OF A COMPLIMENT ;

make it ur mission to give a compliment everyday cuz first off, being nice is HOT so pls be nice and second of all, if ur trying to talk to someone and u start with a compliment i promise that it'll go so much better.

if ur thinking "thats so awkward how will i do that" then the category dont be shy is one that u gotta read cuz girl 💀. if u need an example i'll provide one from my own experience so u can see the power of a compliment.

there was this girl in my spanish class and i always thought that she was so pretty and she seemed so nice. one day we bump into each other in the bathroom and i compliment her hair and makeup, she responds well. we continue to have friendly interactions throughout the rest of the school year and now we are good friends on and off campus.

DONT BE SHY ;

when u make friends please please PLEASE work on ur confidence first. you need to be SURE of yourself. if not, when ur being friendly it could come off as desperation and ppl will humiliate, make fun of and take advantage of u. and thats NOT hot.

be CONFIDENT, you literally have nothing to lose. when u shed ur shyness (thru things like exposure therapy etc) a whole new world is opened up for u bcuz sometimes the only thing holding u back is urself and ur limiting beliefs about urself.

MAKE UR PERSONALITY SHINE ;

make sure that know ur own personality and from knowing that u can find ways in which u can make it shine. no matter what ur personality is though, something that i cannot stress enough is BE NICE.

be friendly and amicable with everyone and stay out of drama and if drama comes to you then stay unbothered 😭. dont try and uproot ur own personality to copy someone else's.

#honeytonedhottie⭐️ #becoming that girl #it girl #self care #self love #that girl #it girl energy #advice #girlhood #dream girl #dream girl tips #dream life #friendship #social life #social butterfly #princess #hyper femininity #hyper feminine #doll #self improvement #self growth #self development #being a good friend #be nice #self concept #confidence #confidence tips #self confidence

[fondcrimes]

last weekend my mom showed my artwork from the literal 8th grade to my uncles and did the whole bragging while accusing me of wasting my talents thing so I think I need to scrounge up some family friendly inoffensive RECENT art for her while I’m feeling inspired after like 2 years of nothing maybe she’ll get off my case finally lolol 😅😅😅😅

#my parents act like I fell out of a coconut tree knowing how to draw its sooo #my dad literally posted my cringe h*milton fanart on facebook like all I know is humiliation #my mom likes to pick fights cuz she thinks I can focus on my hobbies while focusing on school fksjsjfjd #it’s nice that they care but at the end of the day I’m not an ambitious person #I can rly only do one thing well at a time #and I haven’t put any serious discipline on art since high school so naturally it’s become a very casual pastime #meaning there have been months where I forget I can make visual art lmfaoo #idk where this was going lol I’ve suddenly been thinking about my relationship w art again #it’s difficult to gauge my skills or compare them to professional/expert artists when I’ve been purposefully ignoring that kind of thinking #bc I’m idealistic enough to say I don’t want to make art a side hustle… and cynical enough abt writing to consider it anyway

[phosphophylight-of-my-life]

oshi no ko aqua is such a fun character bc by most counts he's a more than decent guy.

in his first life he regularly visited hospital inpatients who had no visitors. he was genuinely happy and excited to help Ai deliver her babies, because he wants her to be happy on her own terms. he saves Akane simply because he can, and gets angry at the staff on her behalf. he doesn't stop at saving her life and spends sleepless nights turning around her public image. at that point there was nothing in it for him to keep akane around, she was just a person he was able to help and wanted to help.

by most counts he's a pretty decent guy who steps up when people need him most, except. except he's also a guy who really wants to kill his dad and that makes him manipulate people somewhat often and this is somehow not entirely at odds with his instinct to help others

#oshi no ko #like he's a doctor i can rly respect yknow #except for the patricide thing #gorou said do no harm unless it's my dad #also the way that gorou regularly visit patients is something SARINA has to tell the audience and not gorou #bc to gorou is nothing worth mentioning #for quite a while i was like man gorou is kind of sleazy for only visiting sarina esp when she's so young and vulnerable #but he visits the others also... sarina was just the most special patient to him because she introduced him to ai and also #because she was a kid whose parents never showed up #also SPOILERS FOR LIKE CH90+ OR SMTHING BELOW #the way aqua doesnt let akane dirty her hands like ok aqua we get it you want the best for everyone who isnt your dad #wipes tear someone get him therapy hes a decent guy who's ruining his life #also the way he is conscious of how he's playing w akane's feelings and tries very hard to be honest with her and to do her right #like sigh okay aqua i GUESS i cant hate you #and that one ghosting kana arc where i wanted to beat him up and then he was like i dont want to drag kana into this & he looked terrified #like SIGH. OKAY. FINE AQUA i cant hate you after all #like apart from the patricide (which is big know) the biggest downside to his personality is how cold he is #he pushes ppl away all the time and is just borderline rude #but like idk i feel like thats a byproduct of his 'i plan to go to jail for patricide and dont want to drag others down' mindset #which is like... well. you can't hate him for that.. he's looking out for others in his own way

[skitskatdacat63]

This is a special genre of f1 picture(to ME.)

#ive talked a lot about helmets lately oops #i guess i just rly have an obsession with how they're an extension of the driver #and a representation of them and their only sense of personality and individuality when theyre all geared up #so theres something to me about the separation of helmet from driver like in these pics #of course theres pics of the helmet on its own for model kinda pics(like all the pics i used for my past project posts) #but this is its own genre. helmet doing its own thing. helmet away from the vicinity of its owner #helmet being protected from the elements. it has its own carrying bag. it gets an umbrella. etc etc #the first pic made me on the lookout for pics w a similar vibe. IDK WHY BUT IM RLY OBSESSED WITH IT #having a severe helmet fucker era </3 i look at these and i feel very weird about them 😭 #not included cause its a differnt genre but also thinking abt pics where someone other than the driver themselves is holding their helmet #theres something weirdly intimate to me about it. its too reminiscent of that one painting of the germanic warrior holding the roman helmet #<- DO YOU GET WHAT IM IMPLYING HERE. #anyways. i digress. helmet being taken care of and protected is cute to me #its such an extension of the driver so its kinda funny ig that they get their own photoshoots #also yeah these are all nando helmets bcs i couldn't find pics from other drivers that i thought had the same vibe #and i think its interesting how these correlate with whom the photographer is and the level of popularity of the driver #like are you popular enough that someone will see your helmet apart from you and think its important enough for a pic? #and its so interesting comparing pics from the same time from different teams #bcs you can see how different the motivations of the different photographers are based on what the pics are like #well blah blah blah helmet kink blah blah blah #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #helmet

[danothan]

tough pill i have to swallow is realizing that “getting better” doesn’t mean “getting to do more things,” getting better for me means taking better initiative in protecting myself. and THAT means making sure i do LESS things

#sounds kinda obvious but i only just realized it lmao #feels like i have to grieve a lot of my goals now but no one said the healing process would be easy #danbles #and for anyone else that has a disability that prevents them from doing smth #or trauma that makes certain triggers limit their opportunities #or neurotypes that make it harder for them to love smth like they used to #or whatever else #i don’t want to make it sound like you have to give up on the things that make you happy #I’M certainly not going to #but a huge value of mine has always been experiencing everything life had to offer #and everytime that backfires (whether it’s burnout; triggering a flashback; triggering an episode; putting strain on my body; etc) #i always just thought to myself ‘it was bad timing’ or ‘i haven’t gotten better yet’ bc the endgoal was to always get to that point where #i could experience it. i want to try new things all the time. i want to feel normal and be included in everything #but if smth keeps Making Me Feel Bad then maybe there isn’t a version of myself that can take it on #it’s not resilience to put yourself in harm’s way #idk how well i’ll be able to put this into practice tbh. i rly rly like exploring different experiences #even negative ones are valuable to me #but the least i can do for myself is recognize that i might not always be the problem #maybe i’ve already hit the limit on all the self-work i can do. maybe it’s the environment or situation itself that’s the problem #fuuck guys ​i feel like i’m going thru a stage of grief here why is this shit so hard 💀

[toastsnaffler]

sometimes I wish I was a more interesting + charismatic person just so I could keep conversations going bc I like sharing space with other ppl but they routinely lose all interest and leave once I run out of things to say/start talking abt things that don't concern them :-(

#and boy do I run out of things to say so fast when I'm talking to friends who ik dont give a fuck abt any of my interests... #theres only so much i can make small talk or ask them questions abt their own interests/lives yknow. man #it just makes me feel like im constantly competing with smth else for other ppls attention all the time + constantly losing #eg. when i say smth + my flatmate reaches for her headphones a little dark souls banner appears across my vision like INTERACTION FAILED #and i can feel my rsd + insecurities praying on it like the more i feel this way the more it prophetically fulfils itself #by making me less willing to try and take up space so i become a smaller and smaller person around others #it frustrates me a lot sometimes and i dont rly have the will rn to undo that and force myself to take up more space regardless #ik this sounds like a water is wet complaint like oh nooo woe is me people get bored of me when i talk abt boring things (!!) #but when im spending time w ppl i like i enjoy listening to them talk even if im not interested in the subject bc its Them talking #and if they care abt smth then its worth hearing abt!! to me anyway. but it rly feels like no one reciprocates that idk #oh well not that it matters. at least i like the shit im into so i can talk to myself abt it in my head or on this site lmao #and i like myself as a person even if other people dont so theres always that. ur no 1 should always be urself <3 #voicing this makes me feel so stupid + embarrassed urgh. i hate being anxious abt dumb shit i hate being the sort of person who worries #that their friends privately dislike/just tolerate them or whatever bc id never want a friend to worry abt whether i thought that abt them #and im not naturally a very insecure person!! i think im just feeling particularly vulnerable atm bc of the season + jobhunting so long #+ the fact im dissatisfied with my current social life + still feel very wobbly from not having other ppl i can trust or rely on etcetcetc #and thats just bleeding into other areas. and it sucks a lot. but theres nothing to be done abt it rn bc im not going to communicate it #to other ppl bc im not pathetic enough to make my anxieties someone elses problem + beg for pity attention im too proud for that 👍 #anyway. gonna play some noita + then i rly need to work out today bc thats probs part of why im feeling so shite #if ur reading this ignore me im just venting itll pass. i hope youre having a nice day :^) #.vent #.diaries

[arolesbianism]

I’ve been having a rough few days, but I’ve been feeling a bit better so I decided to make some lil thingies for some spiraling upwards kitties :3

#keese draws #warrior cats oc #spiraling upwards #I’ve posted art of ratstar and pigeonbillow before but the other three I haven’t I think #but yeah these are some more of the minkclan founders #and by that I mean two of them are and one of them was a kitten at the time #lightning is haveniris’ mom but she didn’t trust herself to raise him so her clanmates sort of collectively raised him #and by that I mean mostly pigeon and two other old ppl that aren’t included here #light did end up opening up to him more and acting as more of a mom after he chose to become a medic tho #the two have a complicated relationship for sure but they still care abt each other a lot #oh yeah and literally all of these guys are dead by the time murtle rolls around except for haven #pigeon died about two years before the other two and raincinder has been dead since before minkclan was properly founded #which is unsurprising given she’s such an old withering woman #she mostly made it that long because she was given a guide sponsor life #so long story short not all starclan cats actually get to use the cool starclan powers and those who do are usually ‘sponsored’ with an #extra life and a cool star like marking #this isn’t a well known thing tho and even within starclan only higher ranking cats rly know anything beyond knowing that every now and #then new guides are chosen #now usually what’s supposed to happen is that the sponsored cat has a close eye kept on them and if they are deemed worthy they’re allowed #to keep their mark and become a guide once they die the second time #the main flaw in this system is that the cat who sponsored them has to be the one to revoke it #so if they refuse to revoke it for whatever reason there’s not much that can be done about it #or in raincinder’s case her sponsor ended up fading before they could judge her fully #so even though by all means even the most rebel friendly guides would revoke it easily she managed to keep her mark til death #this was ofc largely helped by her living til 19 fucking years dear god woman #but hey I guess it means minkclan gets a guide even though she’s a rly shitty one #rly that mostly only matters for the sake of nine lives and the sake of travel between starclan and the living territories #which actually does cause a lot of problems when all the guides decide to go haunt a child instead #oh also guides also pass on their mark to leaders who’s life ceremony they hosted #not the guide role tho each guide gets a new mark

[sengenism]

just realised how i usually dislike or feel indifferent about shounen mcs but senku and gon hxh are the only ones who actually manage to enter my top fave characters of their respective fandoms... they're so well written

#like i dont consider every other character in dcst well written tbh theyre quite one dimensional #but it doesnt affect their likeability to me i still enjoy their characters v much #me being a danganronpa fan might play a part actually dcst characters r all talent based like them #but senkus the only dcst character who has rly good writing imo and im so glad for that #hes so hopeful but not in a way that i find annoying idk #he has such a deep trust in humanity despite his character being all like ughhh affection ugghh i only care abt science #but he loves humanity so much and i just RAHHGHHH cant relate but it makes me want to believe in it too #i wanna reread dr stone but i dont rly have time but i wanna re-experience that hope #senku's relationship with his dad.... the way his dad struggled for the future bc he believed in his son #and as for gon i could never be a gon haterrrrr #like ppl hate him for his selfish tendancies but that just makes him more unique to me #he is like. 10 and now 12. dudes a child he does things based on his emotions yeah #the way he lacks the gift of discernment bc of his childlike manner and all #just makes him better #rant post ig bc i rmbr i have this acc and now instead of annoying my irls w my talks and i can speak to the void here #what prompted this was seeing one of those x > y twt post involving senku #LIKE DO NOT SPEAK ON HIMMMM

[piplupod]

me like four days ago to an old friend who msged me to reconnect: "yeah no i think things are settling down maybe after this last month of actual hell"

today: mother's medical situation has been handed a kablooey and the next few months are going to be Even Harder

#she is getting a biopsy tomorrow. and um. medications are being fucked with to drastic degrees #and we're going to have to wait several months for surgery when she was supposed to originally get it next month #fucking hell i am so incredibly stressed fjjfkdl i dont want this to be happening at all #i am the caregiver who is in charge of making sure she's conscious and okay at all times when dad's not available #i.e. he is at work or sleeping (shift worker) #and then bc of this im also on 911 calling duty if she ever does have smth happen #which isnt entirely out of the question. augh. #its uhm. a rly fucked thing to have to be the caregiver for ur abuser. im not doing very well tbh fjdkdl #this is also why hiatus is happening rn dhdksl things are so incredibly nightmarish rn #idk how im doing as well as i am <- is incredibly out of touch w reality and dissociating to dangerous degrees #idk!! i am frightened and exhausted and i just am begging whatever higher power may exist to let this be over one way or another honestly #get me out or get me gone or do smth to another of the chess pieces in this game so it can all finally stop #i need to go do 1k more words before bed tonight if i want to keep on track w november writign month #but i also desperately am needing to do my nightly drawing+decompressing fbfjdkdl so idk what to do its already 9pm augh augh #luckily i have dbt tomorrow so i will get to See real live ppl again tomorrow #its been a week since i talked to or have seen anyone outside of family face to face fbkfdl #god i am so fucked fjkfdl this is so so so bad and i cannot do anything abt any of it #i rly fucking wish dbt was helpful for ongoing situations but it seems like its only for short term bad times fjfjdldl #im so gjfkdld this is so fucked and i am aaaaaaaaa #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #vent tw

[volfoss]

also its very funny bc choosing a misdeeds mission will have mistos going up to you and being like 😒 do you REALLY wanna do this one. like the one im doing rn is about this sibling who was like hey. i dont want my sister to date. kill the guy shes dating. and mistos was like this is mushy relationship stuff and i dont wanna get involved :///// and when i get there, shalvas starts the battle with smth along the lines of i really dont want to do this but here we go. literally what is his deal

#twist rambles #♟ #normally hes like ok ^-^ lets go into battle. its very funny to me bc its not JSUT my guilt over doing anything bad in games but they #will just be fucking miserable when u do evil missions. its very funny to me bc like. shalvas DOES have an established character. 10000% bu #if vol/foss was popular i knowwww people would give him the giorno treatment of no personality and he sucks to a majority of people. #but anyways it IS silly to me that mistos has to give his 2 cents on every mission you go on. even if its not an evil one. i think he prob #is mad at shalvas for taking this evil mission but shalvas is also on mad at me island due to me making him do this one so. really its only #fair. or something. its silly to me i like the little touches that they add. bc idk like normally ur protag in a game is pretty moldable to #ur choices. ie like. tw2s you have to pick the guys that suck so bad or the elves we are insanely racist to for a lot of the game #and like. when u look canonically. peepaw does notttt like to pick sides w the war. and esp since he doesnt have his memory back fully by #the time he makes that choice theres no way that he can use his prev knowledge from the LAST war to inform his choice. and that game treate #it as like yeah siding w the govt who are notoriously rly bad or the elves who are well. they sure fit them into the trope of i wrote a bad #guy and he has valid points but to make sure ppl hate him i have to have him do extreme evil. so u dont WANT to choose the elves side. #unless u suffered thru the really fucking bad racism in the books irt that. which i did. so for me its very funny to like. see vol/foss #handle the thing of ok u have choices and one of them is something it doesnt seem like the protag would do. in a more natural way ig.

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

the best part about super mario rpg on the switch is that i can play it in bed or on long car trips

geno and i will never be apart again

#DCB Comments #what did you think that last post abt it was the last i would say abt it. haha you're a silly goose :) #i can play fe7 in the meantime while i wait but it's gonna be the longest wait in my life lbr #I KNOW I KNOW I'M A FIRE EMBLEM BLOG BUT. LIKE. IT'S SUPER MARIO RPG I HAVE RIGHTS #I am also curious how long they took to make this bc for example the ToS port was trash lol #but this game looks like they actually took their time with it and cared abt it #ig they only rly do genuinely amazing work on the games they expect to sell well and shrug their shoulders at other stuff #kinda sad for the ports of other games but this remaster looks like actually gave a shit abt the final product #AND YEAH I'M STILL AN FE BLOG BUT UH... EXPECT A LOT OF SMRPG POSTING AT THE END OF THE YEAR #i don't think you understand my buddies that was my fave game as a wee little t'ing #and in recent years i have listened to the soundtrack regularly. i do not mean once in a while #i mean REGULARLY. i have spent years BEGGING for them to at least put on the online services #not to say i can't just play it WHENEVER THE FUCK I WANT BC I LITERALLY OWN IT AND AN SNES LOL #but it's VERY SPECIAL to have it on the switch as well. also now the modern gaming world is going to be #relentlessly subjected to geno content and crazed fans like me and i think that's just wonderful :))) #anyway SO YEAH EXPECT A LOT OF SMRPG POSTS WHEN THE PROMISED HOUR ARRIVES #I don't currently plan to go full multi fandom but I've considered sprinkling my other interests #with FE still being the main focus of this blog bc at this point it's still my main thing with an active fandom #ALSO DID YOU KNOW in fact no you didn't bc i didn't ever talk abt on this blog but #i was considering cosplaying geno to the very last con i went to in 2019 (haven't attended one since) #if it turns out i end up going to my usual con next year maybe i'll try again! i have mikey planned but i can add another outfit!!! #did u also know that growing up i had zero idea that geno was so popular like i didn't know until the internet was cool and all #and then i found out that everyone else loved him too and i was very surprised to see how popular he was #but also was like yes rightfully so

[apollo-just-ice]

Been replaying pokémon mystery dungeon explorers lately and it’s been on my mind sm,,, my childhood game of all time it’s still so good??? Mannnnn <333

#grovyle ur one of the characters of all time ugh!!!! #so many things about it are so good #like. the music ofc #the characters are all memorable and fun :) #the worldbuilding even?? like rn I’m not that far in but. #just from the guild itself #it rly makes you feel like it’s so real #you get into the routine of it and like #it rly sets the pace so well to start #yay we can explore dungeons yay! #then ya know it all grows from there #idk what I’m saying exactly rn but 😭 #my partner character this time is a bulbasaur named Heiðr… yeah. yeah. she’s cute #cant wait to get to grovyle tho my guy I wasn’t thinking about u for so long but *now* I miss you… #this is one of the only games I’ve rly replayed #def the game I’ve replayed the most #brainrot incoming maybe #yeah! #peak game sm… I do recommend it :) #pokemon #pokemon mystery dungeon #oh also sidenote to do with naming her Heiðr - we are team ouroboros which I think is a rly rad team name also-

[wrecking]

i love my friends and family and support network but i'm not gonna lie i have ended up with some glaring missing spots in it and i'm so afraid of reaching out to new people that i'm just kinda resigning myself to figuring it out all by myself lol

#d #...oh ok triggered my own dysphoria in record time with this one ouch #thinking about how i'll never get to like get the experience of doing makeup with my friends or trying on clothes w them #or having like peers to share those aspects of my expression with #not to mention being fat gives me a unique horrible angle on trying to find stuff and feeling alone among my network #i love them all so much but there are times where i wish i still had more and i feel bad about it but i also know i shouldn't #i just feel rly alone with regard to where i'm at with my transition and presentation and what i need social support from like #i am looking to people i can like. imitate. learn from. that i can kind of bounce ideas off of and have them actually know how to help #not to say there's no way i could do these things with my current support but like there's a glaring lack of people *like me* in that group #i feel like i am kind of living an alien life compared to what they all do and experience and it's disorienting bc we get along so well #this is 2 separate overly verbose ways of saying i wish i had transfem friends irl or even just cis girl friends irl to do stuff with #my online friends and my mom can only do and understand so much you know #sigh . whatever i'm posting this despite it being a mess and pathetic lmfao

[marciliedonato]

Currently fighting with someone in the pmore SA/LatAm tour post comment section bc apparently the UK is all of Europe and ppl from Europe don't get to ask to have a good time bc bri'ish people only think abt themselves and as long as they get what *they* want that's all that matters I guess 💁🏼‍♀️ woe is me 🙄🙄

#Like lmao first I was like 'maybe ur just confused' and gave them the benefit of the doubt and shit #Bc I commented where are the eu dates and they said 'oh scroll back they already did' even tho I KNEW that was bs #Bc they had only announced UK so I said sure it's a part of Europe but there are more countries #If that's eu then I guess I live in Narnia and they literally just went "well I got tickets no prob #If u lived where I do u wouldn't have any problems with that' like NO FUCKING SHIT guess u don't get to have a good time then? #Oh my God what an asshole I am for asking to see one of my fav bands my poor little European peasant self 🙄🙄 GAG #It was just sooooo condescending now I'm seeing red you tried it bitch #That's not the exact wording of what they said but it lowkey got me abt to ask someone to hold my purse bc I'm gonna act out #wow anna said something #anna's shitposts #You can take your atitude and shove it up your ass while you're at it... Fucking British people... #I literally dk if they're British but I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume bc the whole thing was abt the UK #Yes it was on the SA leg post bc that's what's abt to start lol #Either way if they're not I don't rly care bc the way they said it just sounded like they get shit without having to ask... So UK #Bc they always get shows for everything but ik it's not the same for LatAm #*I don't get get not u it's 3am give me a break bro (in the 3rd tag)

[chisatowo]

Oh also bonus doodles messin around with a brush Ive been messing with lately plus a slightly crunchier version of my default pixel brush

#keese draws #oc art #oc #ocs #furry #furry art #furry oc #sfw furry #and also a new guy I got today yippee #I’m working on reviving an old story of mine but first I need more characters #I had only rly conceptualised like 2-3 ocs back when I first made it and it’s more like one and 2 halfs lol #basically it follows a group of adventurers that slowly come together despite the gods best efforts #despite the strong familiarity found in the rest of the party something still feels.. off abt their world #and without diving too deep into things the gods of this world are basically playing tug of war with reality #they all want to be the figure in which humanity emulates and the starting point for morality #but none of them really have the power to run the universe by themselves #so the best they can do is try to create s world where they can’t necessarily thrive but where the others won’t survive at all #it’s not going well for anyone involved lol #oh and also there’s time bullshit cause of course there is lol #it’s not too wild tho mostly just reverted memories and also one person erased from their memories #oh and also that person is stuck in a time loop which thourougly traumatizes them and ruins her life but yknow #she’s the original character btw her name is lace and I love her <3 #she was originally the main character and the whole story was basically abt the timeloop and aftermath of said timeloop #but now I’m probably gonna make it abt the party as a whole with her as a secondary pov until their timelines converge #at which point her arc continues similar to in the old story but with the others more fleshed out this time lol

[toastsnaffler]

my flatmate asking me the day before "do u want to hang out w me and [old friend] everyone else cancelled so I can invite u now" is not the heartfelt offer she thinks it is :^/

#what am i sloppy seconds. fuck off man #i like them both but im not in the place to socialise rn + also it just feels kinda mean. theyve had these plans for weeks #and i wasnt invited bc some of their other friends (who ive never met) didnt want me there which is fair enough ig #even tho their friends complained abt someone else bringing her bf but they both blocked the veto for that. pretty sure ik them- #better than some guy but whatever. i dont rly like their friends anyway bc they only ever have bad things to say abt them #like damn they sound like they have the emotional range of toddlers plus theyre all into shit like genshin. so i wasnt fazed abt it #hope they have a nice time etc but wow sure now theyve cancelled the day before u can invite me as a replacement. yeah thatll do wonders #for the social and self esteem issues i have around being single use and disposable and always on the outside etc yippee #the thing is if i go theyll just talk to each other anyway and leave me to be the fly on the wall like they always do. they dont want #me there they just want an audience i literally have nothing else to contribute i dont think they even like me that much so! #anyway complaint over. genuinely i hope they have a nice time im just annoyed at being treated like that + probably projecting a bit too #its not like i could go if i wanted to anyway bc i have shit to sort out + mail to wait for. maybe next time invite me from the start huh #we had another old friend visit last weekend but those plans were really made without me too and i was just added bc i Live Here so its #kind of unavoidable. but oh well whatever it was nice to see them either way #im too depressed rn to fix my social life or even rely on existing coping strategies in social situations so im having to temporarily #cut it back bc i get too trigger sensitive + dont want to hurt myself or others bc of an arbitrary emotional overreaction #its usually one of the first things to go when im Going Thru It not in a self isolating way but more bc its one of the hardest things #for me to maintain + im pretty self sufficient so its not absolutely crucial. like of course i love my friends but socialising is a #want not a need yknow. eating/sleeping/exercising/hygiene are all more fundamental parts of the engine so i gotta prioritise them #and it sucks but ill survive. anyway sorry for venting on everyones dash so early in the morning i woke up grumpy 👎 #i need to get breakfast and then go out. ughhhhhhh okay. #.vent