#I’ve reposted and deleted this many times because of mistakes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arrycx · 2 years

Text

Show Me How You Burlesque

AN: Took a bit of time but its finally out. Steve with a bit of Burlesque ... hopefully you like it. REPOST FROM DELETED BLOG Word Count: 2834 Summary: Steve finally asks you out, with a little push from Robin and a coworker Warnings: Small make out mention, some swearing and mentions of alcohol

Steve was walking into the living room, having finished getting ready for work, he saw you sitting there watching tv. His footsteps were what made you look away from the screen

“Cute vest” you said with a laugh

He looked down at his outfit, he was wearing a black vest without a shirt under and black jeans to match and laughed as sat down next to you making you lay your head on his shoulder. No matter how many times you played your head on his shoulder he couldn’t seem to get used to it, he knew for a fact that he was in love with you and there was no denying it

“You know Y/N I never got to thank you” Steve said making you look at him

“For?” You said tilting you head to the side looking very confused and god did he think you looked so cute

“For, letting me move in with you. I know you didn’t have to do it and if I’m being honest, I know you did it because I’m Robins friend and well she’s you sister after all plus you got me a job which you didn’t have to do” Steve said making you smile

“Well, yeah I didn’t have to but when Robin asked if you could come with her to LA I knew you must be really special to her because she never asked to bring someone. It was always just her when she told me she was moving out here and well the job well its really nothing I work at the club, so I know that we needed people” you said looking at him

“You know, I’ve always wondered, how did you manage to work at a burlesque club?”

“Ahh well you see I was wondering one night because my friends were really boring, and I found the club I paid to get in and fell in love with it and now here I am and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been” you smiled as the memory came to your mind of that night

“Yeah, it is actually very fun working there” Steve said with a small smile

It had been a year since Steve and Robin had left Hawkins to live with you, after the events of the upside down they needed out and since they were of age to leave Robin had suggested going to live with you in LA. You were Robins older sister, being as one day Mr. Buckley decided that he wasn’t happy with his wife and decided to look for love in the arms of another woman, that woman being you mother, never telling her that he was married until little Robin came along. Never once did you two ever hate each other much to the dismay of your father, he never liked the fact that you two were close given as you reminded him of the mistake he wished to forget about and act like never happened. Nevertheless, you and Robin remained in constant contact with each other and when she asked to move in with you had been more than thrilled to have her around and the fact that she brought a cute friend with her well was just a bonus in your book.

“I wonder what’s taking Robin so long? She never takes forever to get ready” you said looking at the hallway

“Yeah, I know, normally it’s us waiting on you” Steve said looking at you with a smile

“You’re not even ready yet” you said looking at him

“What are you taking about I’m dressed and ready to go” Steve said gesturing down to his outfit

“Eyeliner my friend” you said which made him roll his eyes

“Right, I was hoping you would forget about that” Steve said making you laugh

“Come on, I’ll help you with it” you said as you stood up

He sat there staring at you which made you laugh and grab his arm pulling him up

“Come on Steve, you know Jess would kill you if you don’t have it on” you said pulling him towards your bathroom

You handed him your pencil and he just looked at it

“I don’t know how to do it” Steve said making you give him a look

“Steve, I taught you how many times already? But okay one more lesson because I’m so nice” you said and move home, so he was sitting on your toilet

You stood between his legs and helped him with the final step in his uniform. If Steve was completely honest, he knew what he was doing he just liked watching you focus on helping him. He knew you were talking and explaining to him what to do, but he wasn’t listening, he was focused on you. He noticed you had moved away from him and tilted your head with a smile

“All done, now come on its time to go” you said as you began to turn around

He grabbed your arm making you look at him. He pulled you towards him pressing his lips onto yours. He wasn’t sure if you would push him away of kiss him back, but he needed to tell you. You wrapped your arms around his neck as his hands went around your waist. He pressed you up against the counter and without even a second thought you hopped up pulling him towards you. His hands made their way up your thighs pushing your dress higher up as the kiss began to get a bit more intense when you heard Robin

“Hey Y/N, are you in here?” Robin said making the both of you pull away

“Yeah, I’m helping Steve really quick we’ll be out in just a sec” you said as you hopped off the counter

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have kissed you, I didn’t mean to do that” Steve said

He walked out the door leaving you standing there confused. Robin walked into the room and looked at you

“You, okay?” Robin said as she stood in the doorway with her arms crossed

“Ummm Steve just kissed me and then said he didn’t mean it right before you got here” you said, and she looked back towards the room

“Let me go have a little chat with him” Robin said as she began to walk out the door

“Dude no, leave it” you said making her roll her eyes as she stood in place

The drive to the club was a bit awkward to say the least. The entire drive Steve was arguing with himself as to why he apologized for kissing you and saying he didn’t mean it, when he did, he really wanted to tell you how he felt but he chickened out and he might have just lost his chance to tell you. You on the other hand were thinking just what had just happened, why had he kissed you? Did he like you? Did he just do it just because? Confused is what you were

Once at the club you went backstage to get ready for the show while Steve and Robin went to the bar area where Sean walked towards them

“Hey Steve, Jess needs to see you” Sean said making Steve drop his rag on the counter and walk off to find his boss

“How is our whole plan to get them together?” Sean said looking at Robin

“He kissed her this morning and then told her he didn’t mean it” Robin said with an eye roll making the man laugh

“Oh boy, let me try something” Sean said making Robin look at him

“What are you gonna try?” Robin said as she leaned towards him

“Let’s just say that a little friend of mine has a crush on Y/N and I might just accidentally let Steve know” Sean said making Robin nod

“Good luck with that one” Robin said making the man shrug

“I mean if anything we can just lock them in the supply closet and not let them out until they confess their feelings for each other, but that’s so beneath us Robby we can do better” Sean said making Robin laugh

“Hey Sean, the zipper on my clothes ripped can you help me” you said walking up to the duo

“Of course, gorgeous, come on let’s go” Sean said following you towards the back

Steve had returned to the bar as the guest started to pile in and find their places getting ready for the show. Steve loved watching you perform and every night he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, of course he got his job done but god was it hard while he stared at you on that stage dancing and singing captivating not only him but the entire crowd. Steve stood with his lower back pressed to the counter arms crossed as he stared at you from his place behind the bar. The smile on his face had not left since you got on stage, Sean laughed as he walked towards the man and leaned over the bar and stared at him

“So, are you ever gonna tell her that you’re in love with her or just stand there and stare at her” Sean said making Steve finally look away

“I’m not in love with her” Steve said looking at him making Sean laugh

“Yeah, and I’m straight” Sean said making Steve laugh

“Besides, even if I did tell her, it’s not like she even likes me back” Steve said looking back at you as you finished your performance

“Listen, she does like you, didn’t she kiss you in her bathroom today?” Sean said making Steve look at him

“Yeah, wait how do you know that?” Steve said looking at him

“Well, she told me … listen she tells me a lot while back there … I’m pretty sure the girls know about what happened between the both of you as of right now” Sean making Steve sigh

“I don’t know, I guess I just got scared” Steve said

“Let me give you some friendly advice, that girl is beautiful on the inside as well and she’s not going to be available for ever… see that guy sitting in that corner right over there?” Sean said pointing to the far corner where a man sat

They both saw as he handed Robin a pretty big box

“You mean Jack? Yeah, he’s a regular here” Steve said

“Yeah, and he’s rich, plus rumor has it he has the hots for Miss Y/N and I’m pretty sure the box is a gift for her as well” Sean said as Robin walked towards them

“Hey Sean, big shot over there said this was for Y/N” Robin said placing the box on the bar

“Told you” Sean said as he took the box from Robin and walked off

The trio knew that you weren’t going to accept the gift and Robin and Sean knew that you had rejected Jack because of your feelings for Steve but they weren’t going to tell him that just yet

“Do you think that if Y/N and Jack get married he’ll let us move in with them or will we have to stay at the apartment while she lives in a mansion?” Robin said as she looked at Steve’s annoyed look

“I don’t know Robin now get back to work” Steve said walking away from her

Robin tried to hold in her laugh as she walked away from the bar to attend to the costumers all around her. The fan favorite ‘Good Girl’ started playing throughout the speakers and you appeared wearing a blond wig wearing some white lingerie. You had a part where you were dancing on the bar and which Steve had to help you move from one end towards where the mirrors were behind him. You grabbed the hat off his head, which wasn’t part of the choreography you just did it because you thought it looked good, and winked at him as you continued the song, he laughed but moved out of the way giving the crowd a view of you as you dropped down and then stood back up.

After, the performance was over you had some time to kill before the next song, so you decided to take the gift back to Jack before you forgot about it. You walked towards his table holding the box

“There she is” Jack said as he smiled at you

“Hey” you said and before you could say anything else he interrupted you

“Did you like the shoes I got you?” Jack said gesturing to the obviously unopened box

“I didn’t open them, listen I really appreciate the gesture, but I told you that I can’t be accepting these gifts and that I didn’t like the fact that you keep doing this inspire of me telling you to stop” you said sliding the box over

“Well Nicole liked it, so I don’t see the issue” Jack said

“Well, I’m not her, so please stop and please just leave me alone like I have asked of you several times” you said as you turned to walk away from him

He grabbed your arm rather roughly and pulled you towards him

“Listen here, you little bitch you’re not going to disrespect me like that especially in front of so many people take the fucking gift and the benefits that will come with it” Jack said as you tried to pull your arm out of his grasp

You pulled your hand out od his grasp and walked away from him. You knew he was staring at you as you walked off seeing as you could feel him staring and the mirrors in front of you showed he in fact was looking at you

“Are you okay?” Steve said as you stood by the bar

“Yeah, god, I don’t get why he just can’t leave me alone no matter how much I ask and how many times I say I have a boyfriend he doesn’t stop” you said as he stood in front of you

“Maybe if he saw you with that said boyfriend, he would leave you alone” Steve said making you roll your eyes

“I don’t get it, why does he need to see me with someone to leave me alone and small issue I don’t have a boyfriend” you said

“I know, he’s a fucking ass but listen” Steve began to say but you cut him off

“I don’t even know why I’m talking to you right now I’m mad at you” you said

“What did I do?” Steve said looking at

“Oh, come on, you kiss me making me feel something and then say that you didn’t mean it like what is that all about” you say pushing his chest a but

“Wait, you like me?” Steve said and you laughed

“Um yeah, thought I made that pretty clear I guess not” you said crossing your arms over your chest

“Kiss me” Steve said as he moved closer towards you

“So, you can say that you didn’t mean it again?” you said making him laugh as your hands went to the side of his face

“Shut up” Steve said pressing his lips to yours

You smiled into the kiss as he pulled you closer towards him. Steve pulled away and kissed your forehead

“You can officially say you have a boyfriend” Steve said making you look around

“You found me one? Where? I’m kidding” you said with a laugh making him roll his eyes

You look over his shoulder to see Jack being escorted out by some security guards

“If he comes back in here let me or Jess know, he isn’t allowed back in” Sean said making you jump

You looked to your right to see him standing next to you and Steve with his arms crossed

“Jess and I saw the whole thing and the next time something like that happens and you don’t tell us we’re gonna have issues” Sean said looking at you

“But I knew that you were looking at me” you said with a smile

“Yeah, right, let’s go time to get ready” Sean said motioning you towards the back

You moved out of Steve’s embrace and walked towards the door when a newspaper hit your ass

“Hey” you said looking back at Sean

“Come on hurry it up” Sean said as he walked behind you making you laugh as well

You both walked to the door that led to the stairs up to the dressing room when Sean got close to you

“So, he finally made his move?” Sean said

“Yeah, about time” you said making him laugh

“Baby you could made a move on him too” Sean said

“Shut up” you said making him laugh

“It would’ve happened eventually. It’s pretty obvious you two are bound to be together” Sean said with a smile as he walked away leaving you standing in front of your vanity with a smile

#steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington imagines #steve harrington #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x oc #stranger things imagine

135 notes · View notes

redhairedfeistynerd · 3 years

Text

Slush and a Side of Toys

Part 1

A/N: I'm months behind on everything but here is my piece for @sweater-daddiesdumbdork and @sagechanoafterdark Winter/Holiday Festival Challenge. I chose #38 donating toys to children.

Pairing: Chris Evans x reader

Warnings: 18+, SMUT, angst, frustrated reader, swearing, alcohol

Words: 5800+

Part 2 will be up soon!!

Please like, comment and reblog. I appreciate it and thanks for reading.

All mistakes are my own

A reminder - my work is not to be reposted anywhere.

There’s a muffled humming coming from somewhere under a pile of paperwork and takeout containers on your floor. The sound is constant, piercing, and irritating. Eyes still closed, head pounding from an evening of too much wine and schmoozing, you reached down towards the sounds and ran your hands over the stack, following the vibrations of your phone. Once found, you yanked it away from it charging cord and used every ounce of energy you had, pulling the phone close to your face. Opening one eye a sliver to hide from the light, you read from the bright screen.

Hey, listen, I know we've had our differences the last few years but I think it's time we put all of it behind us. I saw Rosie the other day and asked her how you were doing but she kept it pretty vague. I hope to hear from you soon, even if it's only a text to say you’re doing okay.

Reading over the message a second time, in utter shock that he had the audacity to message you and pissed that he even dare ask your friend about how you were; you decided to turn off your phone and toss it into a pile of clothing on the floor.

What. A. Dick.

Rolling back over into your cozy blanket cocoon, falling back asleep, temporarily pushing away any thoughts of the man from your past.

The message was all but forgotten until later that day when a familiar song came on the radio and you couldn’t help but think about how you had both downed several beers at a pub and sang it at the top of your lungs. Maybe it had been a dream earlier and the text never happened. Pulling your phone from your back pocket, hoping it was all your imagination, you indeed saw that there was a text.

The ever-so-hard to escape blue eyed man, was trying to weasel his way back into your life and you weren't having any of it. Dropping the phone into the bag sitting at your feet, getting up from the desk, shaking out a bit to ease the tension that one tiny text had accumulated.

"Don't think about him. Don't think about him. Don't think about him," you repeated the words over and over, hoping to push all thoughts aside. In stocking feet, walking around the small hole you called your office and continued to shake it out. The calm didn’t last as long as you hoped, anger slowly creeping up and out.

"Stupid frikkin guy!! UGH!" The sound of your disgruntled cry, shook you a bit, the frustration clearly coming out louder than expected. "All right, settle yourself down, you can't let him have this sort of pull over you," hoping the self-talk would work, you ran your hand through your hair and walked back to the desk. "Delete it, pretend that you never looked at it and it will go away."

There was no way the struggle going on inside your head would even fathom deleting the text. Truth be told, as much as you cursed and hated the thought of him trying to slide back into your life, there wasn’t a month that went by without a thought of him crossing your mind. A song playing, a Romcom from the 90s, the pizza you both loved so much. Why couldn’t you escape him?

You shot off a quick text to Rosie, curiosity was killing you now, itching inside you, desperate to find out how the hell you had come up in conversation.

Y/N -Word on the street is that you ran into a clown I once knew; I’m curious what was said.”

Rosie: Oh no, he didn’t.

Y/N: He did and it was pathetic

Rosie: It was a super quick interaction. Both of us waiting for a coffee and being friendly. He asked about you almost right off the bat though. It almost rendered me speechless after what happened.

Y/N - So, that’s it? What did you say? Did you tell him how fantastic my life is going and that I probably wouldn’t even remember him?

Rosie: you and I both know, that that’s a load of shit. I’ve had wine nights with you, that man-child has never left that brain of yours.

Y/N Shut up.

Rosie: Really though, it was super quick. I said you were doing charity work and were still in the city, happy and healthy.

Y/N- good to know. I’ll just sit here and pretend his message never happened then. Carry on as usual.

Rosie: see you later this week?

Y/N Definitely, bye babe.

Placing your phone down on your desk, you continued opening your mail: thank you cards for volunteering, appreciation notes from parents and kids, and requests for you to help out at other groups around town. The next month would be hectic, with collecting the many donations from around the city. You had to finish training several new volunteers that would assist with wrapping, delivering, and presenting gifts to the charities and individual families that you helped support during the Winter months.

It became a mechanical process, opening envelope after envelope, that you weren’t paying attention to the return addresses. It wasn’t until you read the first few lines that the letterhead caught your eye and did it burn.

Blue-eyed monster strikes again via his mother.

You knew it wasn’t the case though, his mom, was offering a bursary to some of the kids you helped out and she was reaching out to you and other groups in the city to help.

It didn’t take much to pull your mind from work once you had read the Evans name on the letter. Bits and pieces shifted in your mind; you couldn’t fight it any more today. The letter slipped to the floor and you sat back against your desk, the memories that you had been pushing away, were flooding back.

It all started innocently about three years ago, bumping into one another around town, having several acquaintances that knew each other, and a tendency to make the other smile when the lamest dad jokes were thrown around. His face was incredibly animated and you loved the way his eyebrows would jump up while he spoke, there was mischief behind them that you wanted to discover. Even a quick peek, would ease the curiosity.

You recognized that laugh from across the room of the gallery – full of heart and genuine. Turning around, you spotted Chris mingling with other attendees of the charity event. You were here to help raise money for low-income families in the community that could not afford music lessons or music therapy for their children. The profits from the art sold this evening, would help buy instruments for the school that was set to open the following month. You knew Chris had donated and you had volunteered to help teach the parents with baby's groups every second weekend. It was the least you could do, you had a bit of extra time and needed to give back to the community that helped you and your family out during your childhood.

“How did I know you would be here?”

You must have zoned out thinking about that boisterous laugh that you didn’t see Chris walking over to you. You smiled as he leaned in wrapping one arm around you, a beer being held in his other hand. His smell was intoxicating – a mixture of orange and the woodiness of sandalwood. Would it be wrong if you pulled him closer to take a quick whiff before he pulled away?

He took his time moving back from you, winking as his arm shifted back to his side and lifting the beer to his mouth with the other, take a long sip.

“So, you out here to buy some art?” he asked, taking another drink.

“No, not buying tonight. One of the pieces is mine, I donated it to help out.”

“You have something up for sale here?” He questioned, taking a quick spin around to quickly look at all the art hanging around the gallery. “Which one is yours?”

“Oh, I am NOT telling you that. I think I’ll leave it up to you to figure out which one is mine. You can play the role of Sherlock Holmes.”

“Now, that’s just cruel.”

“Cruel? Nah. Mysterious? Yes. Are you up for a little game of 5 questions to help you out? If you can guess which one is mine, then I guess you have bragging rights because I haven’t discussed my art with anyone here. If you don’t figure it out, then I suppose it will be a mystery forever.”

“Oh, I KNOW I’ll be able to figure this out!” Chris says loudly, clapping his hands together and popping each shoulder up and down. “I’m always up for a challenge.”

“Here’s the deal, you ask me whatever you need to to figure out which one is mine. Obviously, you can’t ask which one is mine as one of your questions. Ready?”

“Ready!” Chris said enthusiastically. He took your hand and brought you to the front of the room to observe the first of the paintings. “Let’s take a quick gander and then I’ll start. How does that sound to you?”

“Whatever you need to do, Evans.”

Chris pulled you from canvas to canvas, still holding your hand as he inspected each piece. “First question. “Did you only use paint for the one you donated?”

“NOPE, next question, Evans!”

“Okay, okay, I got this,” he bounced around on the spot and turned his head to quickly glance over the works close to him. “Shit, I guess I should have asked if what you donated was a painting, right?”

You walk a circle around Chris “Is that your question?” you ask, eyebrow raised.

His blue eyes flick quickly to yours before he says, “Ya, actually...ya. That’s what I want to know. Did you submit a painting?”

“Yes, one of my paintings is hanging somewhere in one of these giant rooms.”

“You really don’t think that I’m capable of figuring this out, do you? Ye of little Faith,” he smirked and pulled you to the back of the dark room. “Any reason why it’s so dark back here?”

“Maybe that’s what the artist wanted?”

“Here’s question three then,” he said as he pulled you closer to him, your eyes looking into his as he asked. “Is you painting in the dark room?”

“Is that really what you want to ask me?”

Chuckling, you take hold of his hand and lead him to another section of the gallery. “I don’t want you to miss any pieces, so take a look around here before you ask number three.” He squeezed your hand and looked up, the ceiling adorned with a beautiful piece; birds in flight but as they reached the furthest wall, the began to decay, until only single feathers remained.

“Here’s number three, ready?” He looked to his left where you were nodding your head back. “Did you mainly use your hands for this piece? I mean, instead of brushes or other tools.”

You were silent for a moment before answering, did you want to tell him how much of yourself you had put into this piece? That what the brushes couldn’t do, you did with your hands and arms? “I did. This one needed more than brushes.”

Chris smiled at you, “feel like telling me what else you used?”

“Not a chance,” you said, grabbing a glass of white wine from the tray passing by. “You want a glass?”

Chris held up his bottle, its content revealing that it was still half full. “I think I have a pretty good idea which one is yours, so these last two questions are going to be good.” With two large gulps, he finished up the rest of his beer. “So, what happens when I guess, do I get some sort of prize? Maybe you could paint me or something?”

“If you mean, could I dump a bucket of paint over your cocky head, then, sure!”

Chris burst out laughing, pulling you into him for a squeeze. “I love how you make me laugh and I bet you would actually do that to me. But really, if I do guess, what happens?”

You kept your body close to his, his arm still holding you close as you responded, “what do you think would be suitable prize, Chris? Do you want me to paint something, make you a prince? Maybe something of you and Dodger? Or maybe I could paint your like one of my French girls.”

“I would love one of your pieces, but if I win this, I’d like to take you out. Is that okay with you?”

Your grip tightened around the wine glass, trying not to let it slip to the floor. It was a shock, to hear that this man, one that you had flirted with for months, was asking if you wanted to go out with him.

“Y/N?”

“Sorry, I... I didn’t expect you to ask me that,” you answered, fidgeting with your hands out of awkwardness.

“It’s ok, you can say no! It’s all right to tell me no.”

“No. No. I’d love that. If you can guess which one is mine, I will gladly go out with you. Dinner, drinks, walk – whatever you like.”

Chris placed his empty beer on the table closest to you. “Ready for my last two questions?”

“As ready as one can be.”

“Is your piece hung on the wall as a landscape?”

“Look at you Evans, you got another one.”

Chris rubbed his hands together, his smile wide and full, clearly showing that he was on a winning streak. “Here’s number four and then I’ll go right to the painting I think, the painting I know it is. Chris walked back and forth in front of you before turning to face you with his last question. You had grabbed another glass of wine and took a sip, waiting for his winning question. “Does your piece use more than black and white? – so many of these photos, sculptures, paintings are very monotone.”

“You’re good Evans and yes, I filled my picture with the rainbow. So, take my hand and show me what the answer to this mystery is.”

His warm hand took your free one and he walked you to one of the side rooms – this room was full of colourful pieces. You could feel the heat flushing across your cheeks and a thin layer of sweat formed at your hairline. Chris stopped and turned towards the back wall and pointed to one of the paintings. “I’m pretty sure this one is yours,” he said with a half-smile. “Am I right?”

You had wished, during those few minutes he had suggested that he take you out, that he would guess which one is yours. But what were the chances with over 40 pieces around you? You tried to keep your body from slouching before you softly answered “No. That’s not mine.”

The happiness in his eyes left quickly once you responded.

“Are you going to tell me which one is yours though?” He asked you eagerly.

“No, I think I’m going to keep that secret to myself. Thanks for the fun, Evans, I should get home. Another day of charity work for me tomorrow.”

“Wait, Y/N, I’d still like to take you out though, will you let me do that, please?”

“I guess we’ll have to see what the future brings,” you replied, giving him a little wink and a squeeze to his hand, you took one last sip of your wine before heading to the coat check.

Chris watched you as you wrapped a scarf around your neck and slipped your arms into the long, wool coat. Walking back over to him and wrapping your arms around him, it was a quick hug and he barely had an arm around you before you were stepping back. With a smile on your face, you turned and stepped out into the night. Chris watched as you turned right and glanced his way, your hand lifting up and into a quick wave. He couldn’t stop smiling and knew he had to see you again.

It didn’t take long for that to happen. You couldn’t get him out of your thoughts and dreams after the encounter at the gallery. He really was something; funny, compassionate, a hard worker, and you couldn’t deny that he was incredibly good looking.

After an event in town and a few drinks later, it was easy as pie, asking him over for dinner. He had initially thought you were pulling his leg.

Chris couldn’t stop laughing. "Oh ya, sure you want me to come over for dinner," laughing at your request and taking a sip of his IPA.

The pink that had flushed across your cheeks when you had shyly asked him was disappearing like an ice cube in hot soup. He picked up on the change immediately and apologized profusely. "I didn't think you were serious! You are serious, right?”

"Why wouldn't I be? It's just dinner," you shrugged. “I don’t see why you would have such a dramatic response to a simple question.” There was an awkwardness now and maybe you shouldn’t have asked him to come over. “Sorry, I thought since we kind of hand a friendship blooming and I tend to invite friends over...”

He took hold of your arm and pulled you into his chest, a big smile across his face. “I'll come by; don’t you worry. Which day this week works for you? I'll be out of state after this week for a bit, so hopefully something the next few days will work for you,” he said, squeezing you a bit before he released his hold on you.

Trying not to be awkward, you responded "This week will definitely work, tomorrow or the next day are open for me."

"Let’s go for tomorrow, okay? Would you like me to bring anything?” Chris smiled

“Be sure to bring the dog, he's the one I'm really inviting.”

"Well, fat chance of me coming by now, I see where your allegiances lie, " he said half closing his eyes and glaring at you in a teasing manner.

"Ok then, just drop the dog off, I'm sure he'll enjoy the feast."

Chris couldn't help laugh at the way you were carrying on with this charade. The half-smile that was currently on your face was one full of mischief and it was something that he had come to enjoy the last few times he had run into you around town. He could see a sparkle in your eyes, something that he didn’t notice before today and it was something, that he could get used to.

“A thought crossed my mind... what exactly would have happened if I had guessed right?”

“Since that didn’t happen, I guess you’ll never know,” you said with a shrug and nudged him with your shoulder.

“You sure like to tease me.”

“What exactly am I teasing you over?”

“The opportunity to be in your presence again,” he replied, a slight blush crossing his cheeks.

Finishing up your drink, you placed the glass back on the cardboard coaster and turned to face him.

“What the hell is THIS?” he asked grabbing at the green monster type thing that was hanging from a lamp in your living room

"That, is a flying frog - one of those weird ass dad gifts - he's always finding these peculiar creatures for me and I can't seem to part with them.

"It's sure ugly"

"You're ugly!” You shouted back at him and burst into the most beautiful smile he had seen cross your face.

"What are you, 12?

"Sometimes,” you replied.

Chris couldn’t help but laugh at you and pull you into a quick side hug. "You're a funny one" he feels you squeeze him back softly, a smile crossing his face at the quick interaction.

"I better go take a peek in the oven and make sure everything is baking the way it should. Make yourself cozy, I'll be right back." You looked back to him, pointing at the couches before turning and walking down the hallway to the kitchen. Turning you head back, forgetting to offer him a drink but his long strides had brought him right behind you quickly, almost colliding with your body. He tripped up a bit and moved his hand to your hip to catch himself.

"I want to see what you're up to in here, see what the chef is cooking up.” Chris resting his chin on your shoulder to peek at what you were stirring on the stove.

“You couldn’t sit still and wait for me to come back, did you miss me that much,” you teased.

“I couldn’t stand to be apart from you for a second longer.”

“That is the cheesiest lines, Evans. Does shit like that work for you?”

“What matters is, if it’s working on you. So, is it?”

You hummed, refusing to answer the question and carried on taking care of the food in the oven. Satisfied with how everything looked, you turned the timer back on and offered Chris a drink. Agreeing on wine, you pulled a bottle from the rack, passed the stemless glasses to Chris, grabbed his hand, and lead him back into the other room. Sitting on the larger of your two couches, Chris took a place beside you, taking the bottle from your hand, opening the bottle, and pouring you a generous glass before pouring his own.

“To friendship,” he said raising his glass

“To friendship, good food, and drinks,” you added and brought your glass to his, a quick clink, and sips were taken.

Dinner was ready within the hour and you both continued to chat while enjoying your meal.

“That was one of the best meals I’ve had in a long time, thank you”, complimented Chris as he wiped his mouth with the napkin when he had finished his last bite.

The compliment brought the feeling of heat to your face and out of awkwardness you almost knocked your glass over as you reached for the wine.

“Want a refill?” You asked, holding up the second bottle of red that night. “You have good taste in wine, Mr. Evans, this wine is top notch,” you said, looking over the label of the wine he had brought with him.

Chris smirked and slid the glass to his left “I’m glad you think so, I’ll definitely have another. This should probably be the last one though, I feel like I’m overstaying my welcome.” He watched as you poured, your hair falling forward as the wine glass filled. “Cheers, thank you for the invite and many thanks for a delicious meal. You are constantly surprising me with your talents.”

“You aren’t overstaying. I’m enjoying your company and don’t want you to leave yet. Here, let me show you what I’m working on for this year’s event,” you said and pulled your phone out of your dress pocket and slid your finger across the screen. Shifting your body across the cushions toward Chris, you held the phone out towards him.

“What is it you are putting on this year?”

“Another charity event, it’s to help out the single parents that live in the community. I try to donate as much time to charities as possible.”

“You have a heart of gold.”

“I want everyone to have a special holiday season, you do it. I see that you donate time and money to charities.”

“I have the means to help and giving back is extremely important to me.” Chris looked through a few more of the photos before placing the phone down next to him on the couch.

Reaching over to take her phone, Chris put his hand over yours and slid closer. “I know you always think I’m joking around with you when I say how much I love seeing you smile but I’m being 100% honest. Your smile is contagious and I feel like it lights up anywhere we are. It’s a beautiful smile and its part of why I’m so attracted to you.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at him. “Oh shush, you!” you said pushing your hand into his chest, your smile wider than he had seen before. Again, he put his hand over yours and pulled you to him gently with his other hand. He brought you close, enough to hold you against him for a hug. He watched as your eyes tried to find a joke hidden in his face but you quickly realized that there was something else there. You weren’t sure who moved first as your lips met quickly enough that your teeth clacked together and you swore in pain.

“Oh fuck, only I would ruin an almost perfect moment. I’m such an-

He pulled you to his lips again, kissing you softly and trying not to laugh at the look on your face.

“Am I a joke to you, Evans?” you asked, kissing him back on the lips.

“Oh, not at all, I didn’t want to have to explain to people we know how I broke your teeth though. I mean, I could make up some ridiculous story about it, could be fun,” he chuckled.

You couldn’t help but throw your head back and laugh, bringing yourself back up to face Chris and pull him by his shirt towards you and kissing him without any stupid errors. You could taste the wine on him, the sweetness adding to the softness of your kiss. He took the lead, pulling you closer and slipping his tongue delicately across your bottom lip before deepening the kiss.

Your eyes opened when you hear Chris let out a soft moan, not expecting to hear such a sound from him before you could emit one. He did it again and you felt it all the way down your spine and into your soul. Your hands, still in idiot mode, found their way to his hair, and were quickly taking apart his well-coiffed hair by running your hands through it.

“How does your hair smell so damn incredible?

“How do you taste so fucking delicious?

You pulled back, staring him in the eyes “Hmm, maybe you need to taste a bit more, clean that palate of yours,” you teased.

“Are you implying...”

“Not implying, the buffet is open, sir. Dig in.”

Chris’s face went a light shade of red.

“Oh, did I catch you off guard, Casanova?”

“I mean, no... no...’ he stumbled, “OK, fine yes, yes you did.”

“Well, now that you know, let’s get back to business. All right?”

You took control, standing up, taking his hand roughly and leading him to your bedroom.

“I want you to take off my clothing, piece by piece. I want to see it on the floor and,” you said placing her finger on his lips, “no more talking,” you ordered.

“Anything you want,” he whispered into your ear and he ran his tongue down your neck so softly, that goosebumps raised over yours arms. His hands wandered from your shoulders and down your arms, taking hold of your hands and moving them to his belt buckle.

Looking up to him, he nodded, silently urging you. Undoing the belt and still staring into his eyes. Moving to unzip his jeans and push the button away, Chris was unzipping the back of your dress, the cool line of metal touching your back as he drew the zipper down the length of your back.

“You have goosebumps, do I need to warm you up?

“I’m hoping you get to that. Now, what did I say about talking?”

He smirked, pushing the dress down each shoulder until it dropped to the floor. Stepping out of it, you kicked it off with one foot, tossing it towards the wall. Chris’s hands were already roaming, his hands on your hips, fingers sliding into the thin elastic of your panties. His hands slipped across your warm flesh and directly to your cheeks, grabbing each one and squeezing, and pulling you closer to him. His lips were pressed into yours, his tongue back to searching for yours as he wrapped his arms around you and brought you to your bed. Gently, he sat you on the edge and leaned into you bringing you down to the mattress.

His kisses ran down your sternum and across the soft skin of your breasts while his hands ran across the tops, gently running his fingers over your nipples.

“Keep doing that, keep... keep touching my breasts, Chris.”

You could feel him pressing into you, his erection, warm and pushing against your core.

His hands squeezed your left breast while he brought his mouth down to your right, taking the nipple into his mouth, gently sucking it. Running his tongue around the bud, a chill running across your arms and a moan escaping your lips.

“I need to be in you now, please, y/n,” he said, kissing up your chest.

“In the drawer, condoms are there and hurry the hell up, Evans, I’ve waited forever for it to rain and fill up the well.”

He chuckled as he crawled over you, limbs knocking yours, a soft hand slapped across his ass, as you watched him open the nightstand drawer, which got stuck in his effort to hurry. “Come on Evans, you got this,”

“A little self-talk over there to get you motivated?”

Chris smiled as he held up the package and smiled at you before sitting on the edge of the bed to roll the condom down his hard length. He was on you again, returning quickly, his lips pressing against yours. His lips, wet and warm, pushed harder against your mouth as he pushed your legs further apart, taking himself in his hand, rubbing across your wetness and pushing halfway. The groan that escaped his mouth while his tongue continued to touch yours, sent a tingling sensation down your body.

“Chris, please...” you started to plead and before you could continue, he finished pressing himself into you with a grunt.

“Come on baby, show me how well you can move,” he said as he licked a strip across your neck.

Wrapping your arms around his neck and shifting your body against his, you let out a wail. Your bodies moved together, the pace quick, the sounds of your wetness echoing throughout your room.

“Listen to the sounds we’re making, baby,” Chris panted and drove deeper into you. His body was incredibly warm against yours, the sweat making his chest glisten in what light crept in from the hallway.

Chris slipped his hand down and his fingers met your warmth, crawling in to press against your clit. You clenched around him; a low moan escaped his mouth as he continued his movements.

“A bit more, a bit more,” you groaned, your back arching as Chris sped up. You looked up at him and reached your hand up to his face, holding on and staring into his blue eyes as you felt the tingling ball up within.

Faster than expected and with one last swipe of his fingers, your orgasm spread out from within. Your shoulders tingled, spreading down to your fingers as you yelped out, the warmth of pleasure flowing down and across your body. Chris had shifted to move into you, helping your orgasm along as his own shuddering began. His lips were pressed into your neck, your name crossing his lips as he slowed his pace, and leaned onto one of his arms. He continued kissing up your neck and met your lips, heavy breaths escaping from both of your mouths.

“You’re incredible Y/N. Incredible.” One more kiss was pressed to your lips before Chris sat up, heading to the bathroom. You watched the light turn on and the door close behind him. You rolled to your side; a smile of satisfaction crossed your face as you closed your eyes.

Your heart jumped when you were woken by blankets being pulled half off of your naked body. It took you a few seconds to realize that a man, a very handsome man, was sleepy peacefully beside you. Turning to face his back and shimmying closer, you pulled the blanket to cover your shoulders and back. His muscular back stared at you and you couldn’t help but raise your hand to the pale skin, bringing your fingertip to his warm skin and drawing lines to connect each freckle.

“You, know, that feels incredible, please don’t stop,” Chris asked, his words muffled into the pillows.

You continued using his back as your canvas; swans, sunrises, all the beautiful pieces of the world this man helped you see.

Pushing back into you Chris spoke, “I’m going to be away next week, so I’m hoping I can see you again before I head out of town?”

Your fingers drew the word yes on his shoulder in response. Chris turned over to face you, pulling you closer to him for a soft kiss. When he pulled back you couldn’t help but smile and pulled him in for something a bit more passionate.

Bags packed and his dog set to stay with his family, he walked by the room Scott was in. “Hey, I’m heading out, the car is almost here. Give me a hug for the road.” His younger brother stood up and embraced him, giving him a few pats on the back and wishing him well for his short trip. “Will I see you when I get back or you heading back home?”

“I’m pretty sure I’ll be around still. Mom wants me to stay in town a bit longer. You okay if I’m still free loading off of you a bit longer than planned?”

“You know you’re more than welcome to stay,” he said as his phone chimed from his pocket. “Cars here. Take care of the fam and Dodger for me.” His brother gave him a smile and Chris grabbed his coat and carry-on from the table before heading to the front of the house. Dammit, he had forgotten to remind Scott again about what they had discussed earlier that day. “Scott, make sure you get that message to Y/N, okay? This schedule change was pretty last minute.” He shut the door before he heard a response from his brother. The driver held the door open for him and collected his bags to place in the trunk. He couldn’t get you out of his mind on the way to the airport; your smile, the scent of your hair, the warmth of your naked skin pressed against his. He couldn’t wait to be next to you again.

#chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you #chris evans rpf #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fic #writing challenge #ssholidaychallenge #redwrites

135 notes · View notes

viva-la-rebel · 3 years

Text

Goodbye

Hey everyone- this is my official goodbye for tumblr. This site has made such a huge impact on my views and life. I applaud tumblr for letting me explore not only myself but the (mostly) wonderful people on it. It was thru this site I realized I was bi. I made tumblr friends and got to explore my writing. Some of my favorite shows I started because of stuff I saw here.

However, as much as this site holds a place in my heart- I’ve outgrown it. I came on to the site at 15 on the day of Mishapocolyse (yeah that was my first impression). I’m in my 20s now and have a house and a dog and this just doesn’t have a place in my life anymore.

And, I have to say it, tumblr has a at times been a toxic place. I remember in my first months of tumblr, literally not knowing anything, I accidentally reposted art without credit. I was flooded with hate comments, telling me what a shitty person I was. I deleted it and reached out to the original creator and apologized. While the creator was nice enough, it did show me the first ugly side of tumblr.

A few years later I did a cute little thing where if you reblogged a post I made, I would give you a good message or something. Most messages I got were so wholesome, but there were others telling me how irresponsible and bad of me it was to do this because I would never get to everybody. I was trying to do a nice thing and it still wasn’t enough and was turn into something bad. (And I did get to everyone so fuck you).

I also made a supernatural video (ah yes my first hard core fandom RIP) and tagged it with some characters it didn’t focus on. The amount of hate I got was horrible. I had strangers telling me to literally kill myself over a shitty fan-made video I made at 17.

While the majority of tumblr is a great place to explore, too many of its users don’t want to have adult conversations, y’all want an echo chamber. If someone don’t agree or makes a different point (IN A RESPECTABLE WAY MIND YOU)- they are toxic and told to fuck off. I promise you- no matter what fandom or community you are in, it has toxic people. They only want to be told they are right and do not want to think but do as they are told. Do not be this person, that is not the way the world works. Even if you and some else agree on 99.9% of things, there will always be something you don’t. Be adults and have conversations.*

*this is not me saying any phobic or racists people get a pass on their views- y’all are the worst kind of trash. This is more about views on regular things

While this site has made me happy, it’s also taken a toll on my mental health (something people who post here preach about yet rarely hold themselves accountable for causing mental stress). I was so worried about making fucking strangers mad that I would have anxiety for days. Some of you are so busy calling out other people that you fail to look inwards and see who you are and what toxic traits you have. Ive people literally run off this site and told they are shit because they didn’t update fan fiction regularly! Fan fiction! A free fucking sometime a book-worths of story for you- for free! And they are told they are shit because they have lives outside and they don’t update at the exact time they promised.

I’ve seen this site grow wholesome communities. I’ve seen friendships made on this site. I’ve seen so many amazing pieces of art and beautiful writing. I’ve been lucky enough to talk to some really great people. But I’ve seen this site literally cause real world harm. I have seen this site turn people hateful, I have seen this site make people fearful of making one mistake. I’ve seen people such down, I’ve seen people afraid to speak up.

On a last note: just because you are liberal, and think everyone deserves rights, pro-choice, all that stuff (which I totally agree with) it does not mean you are a good person. You can be a bad person with liberal views. You need to be a good person to those around you first. Evolve and learn.

I know this post won’t mean much in the grand cesspool that is this site but to those who it reaches- this site is not the end all be all. Your true friends, who listen to what you have to say- they matter. Your chosen family and friends- they matter. So if you see someone getting hate, speak up because if someone did that for me- I might leave this site with a better taste in my mouth.

✌🏻bye yall

#tumblr #toxic people #toxic tumblr #goodbye #peace out #and honestly fuck 94% of you

57 notes · View notes

mooshua · 3 years

Text

hi uh it’s mooshua (aurora, moosh, whatever you want to call me). I’m so sorry about my sudden leave and everything and worrying some of you. that was really uncool of me to do and I really am so regretful for that. honestly I’m kinda embarrassed right now. explaining myself is rather difficult because, I won’t lie, I’ve been having feelings of inadequacy towards both myself and the works I put out. lol so I’m kind of having a hard time articulating my emotions because my mind is all over the place and I’m literally sweating as I type this out.

long story short: I got burnt out, started hating my writing with all my being, accumulated some Not So Nice messages, and then just did not want to be perceived anymore.

the long story: like I said above, I’ve been having Conflicting Feelings with regards to what I have been writing. anytime I read what I wrote I would just feel my gut twist and turn like I was going to throw up because I WAS SO EMBARRASSED. nothing about it was... up to my standard? nothing flowed right, I could point out a billion mistakes, and I wasn’t laughing like I used to. and it wasn’t just feeling embarrassed, it was like whenever I wrote something I would Not Be Having Fun With It because I kept thinking “deadline deadline deadline you need to finish this by the end of this week it’s only 5k words are you saying you can’t come up with a measly chapter in a week you used to be able to write 15 chapters in a month you dog” and I would just force myself to sit in front of my computer for hours and when I finally finished I wasn’t really happy with the final product I would just think “god I need a smoke break” even though I’ve never smoked in my life. and then I’d also get “please update!” messages/comments in the dry periods and, don’t get me wrong I really appreciate that people are reading my stuff, but I’d feel more and more stressed because then I’d automatically think “Oh My God People Are Waiting And I’m Letting Them Down.”

so with all these bad feelings welling up inside me I thought “I need a break.” and that’s what I did. I took like a 3 week break in september/october (I honestly don’t remember because the days have been bleeding together) in hopes that I just needed to rest to get my brain started again! after those 3 weeks I then did the usual routine of writing and updating, but again Things Just Didn’t Feel Right because it felt like I was diving back into that stress inducing spiral of the dreaded Weekly Updates.

I mean, I would get so hung over this stuff because in the back of my mind during my free time I’d be thinking “I could be writing and finishing up both series right now” and you know what? I’d do that. well, I tried at least. I’d force myself to sit and type whenever I had ANY free time because I already had everything planned, I just needed to put words to a page. well, doing that for nights on end was just mentally exhausting me to New Levels. everything I was doing was not sustainable at all.

AND THEN THINGS SLOWLY GOT WORSE because I would have zero confidence in my writing and every week or so I’d get a message in my inbox saying something along the lines of (or rather word for word) “your writing isn’t that good/special/anything new I don’t understand why people are reading it/why you get so many notes/you’re not as funny as you think you are” and at first I would kind of laugh at it and go “oh trust me buddy, I’m wondering the same thing too” and then delete it because I do Not Wish to entertain the thought on my blog, but then I was hitting a new all time low in my mentality and I got another message on the day I deactivated which was a Really Bad Day and it read “your writing isn’t good” and I went back to the chapter I was editing for the day, felt my gut do that twist and I thought “you know what? you’re right. it’s not. goodbye.” pressed the forbidden red button and honestly felt a weight lift off my shoulders because that meant I no longer had to deal with that stupid cycle of constantly updating in order to Feel Something.

I kept thinking “why is this not as fun as it used to be, why am I so stressed out all the time opening that stupid doc and going on my blog?” like I would literally sit down and think about this as if it was a math problem or something. my inadequacies kept rising within me but I would just bottle it up, go to writing and trying to answer messages like nothing was wrong because I really didn’t want to worry anyone or think I was a charity case who needed help, but now that I think about it I really should have talked this out instead keeping my mouth shut. I just thought this was something everyone goes through so I was like whatever it’ll pass. I kept thinking “this shouldn’t be as deep as I’m making it” and brush it aside, but then I kept thinking negatively about my ability to write and literally DREADED sitting down in front of my laptop that I would have to hype myself up in order to get a sentence in. I think the last time I actually felt really proud of something I had written was during the summer...... and then after that it was just downhill.

and listen. I know this is just a Fun endeavor and I really shouldn’t care about what other people think as long as it makes me happy, but along the way I stopped being happy because I started caring Way Too much and putting unrealistic expectations on myself. it’s weird. I know at my Big Age I should have a better mentality, but it’s been eating at me for a while and I just wanted to pull the plug.

okay now the part that a lot of people are wondering: are you going to finish your series? I plan to. I really want to. I think it’d be a waste not to. I’m still feeling pretty conflicted right now with my writing, but I already mapped everything out, and I don’t like to break promises since I already said I was going to do this thing. thanks to anyone who read my works and I’m sorry to have worried you. I just needed to take a step back and think about what’s good for myself.

yeah. so that’s my explanation. this whole thing is so long and for that I’m sorry. if you went through this then pat on the back for you. I don’t know when I’ll come back or how long it will take. I just want time for myself and to not think about anything with regards to writing. like at all. also I only have 1 request: for anyone who downloaded the series from ao3, please do not repost or reupload or redistribute them. please I’m literally begging. I deleted them for a reason and I really don’t like the idea of these stories floating around without my consent. when I do get back into it I’d like to make edits to what I have written. idk if any of my mutuals still want to talk to me after this but feel free to lmk lmfao sorry I know that I sound like I’m off the deep end but I really just need to cool it before I start diving back into a Healthy Relationship With My Writing Hobby lol. why am I so dramatic... SORRY. anyway. I hope you guys are staying happy and healthy during this time. don’t forget that.

#mooshua #shiratorizawa antics #msby black jackals online!

280 notes · View notes

dailybayonetta · 2 years

Note

what are your thoughts on gifmakers having a ko-fi? do you feel like it's profiting off of someone else's work? (whether it be movies, shows, animes, video games, etc) a mutual of mine is considering creating one but is afraid of the potential blowback. what do you think?

I mean, technically, people do this all the time, like, look at youtube essays and all that with their patreons, artist selling prints of a fanart, it isnt illegal to monetize your content even if it's a property based - unless you got copyright striked or DMCAed from a start, or you originally know the owners of said property copyright anything they see (look at most anime owners or Nintendo who's very strict with fan games and all that, or Genshin devs who require for you to fill what you do and how you do and where u sell it). Fair use does exists after all and gifs, I as much I know, do fairlu fall under that category. To the point that to promote stuff nowadays with gimmick accounts on twitter, that do make gifs for people to use and make gifs with official watermarks and etc, even though that’s what tumblr usually does but for free or hence it might even be just stolen content but people still like to speak as if this site is dead

And, I still think that kind of way (patreon/ko-fi/donations) of profiting IS miles better than what tumblr tried to do with it's subscrtiption posts and else. Like of all sites there it shouldn't be a thing, it's this one (hell, it's not even working properly 80% of the time). Not only tumblr is probably not going to protect you on your fair use, but overall the way your work isn't secured is like... whatever. At worst you'd probably got deleted and be done with it.

Honestly, back in the day (flash to stuff before 2017, as i got into making this blog) I would probably say that people trying to profit off gifs is silly or that it's not going to happen, but simply because I was giffing for fun and my works were usually pretty simple.

But once I started doing more complicated stuff and trying running dedicated blogs and being part of networks, I released how much of the time it takes put the actual sets on the consistent basis (along with answering to people, because I felt like talking too), hell, even on weekly basis it's was time consuming, you know? Finding good footage (or recording as i did to make it crisp as possible, or if it's shows for example getting somewhere bluray/DVD version, or taking time to restore old stuff so it would look GOOD), writing subtitles with no mistakes, making sure that gifs didn't scaled past 4MB (ah, old times), hoping that gifs would appear in the tag, or making something specific that barely few people would reblog but you still would make that because u just want and many more things people while giffing, despite staff constant efforts of making their tagging system and site worse.

Like, I’d still probably wouldn’t do it, but I can totally get behind and see why people would open ko-fi or take donations, like it’s still just like the art posting, or video editing and different kinds of work and considering that users of this site like to ignore reblog button, always did, but in recent history even more, I can’t even be upset in any way and kind of sympathise with people who would probably open a patreon and ko-fi or something.

Answering your question - I would probably say it would only backfire if your mutual is doing Disney shows/content or something (which I also doubt), do seen plently of people doing it and so far no big problems whatsoever.

And just like I said, considering twitter is just a bunch of tumblr stolen content (the amoung of times I’ve seen gifs from my blog being reposted there, as if it’s original post or something, with no appreciation whatsoever or recongising mutuals gifs because i remember their URLs and twitter doesn’t even bother) and not mention that people just straigh up screenshot your gifs and post it to instagram (I’ve even been asked by someone if they are allowed to do so), I think people sure can be allowed to get something in return. For sure.

#long post #text #anon #answered #i probably went on ranting longer than expected #but wanted to make my point across and nice. so hope u don't mind going over the wall of the text <3

8 notes · View notes

acrispyapple · 4 years

Photo

do no reblog art from this person.

they disregard artists. the artists’ rights. the artists’ wishes.

mlqc fandom, PLEASE be extremely mindful of what you reblog.

if there is only a link or an artist name, that art is -stolen- / reposted without permission. do not reblog.

there should always be a disclaimer somewhere that permission was given to post fanart. usually with proof as some people can just claim they have permission even when they don’t. unless that blog is well-trusted when it comes to posting art, there should always be proof of permission.

i always talk about art theft because it’s important to protect the artists who give us content. i’m sorry if you hate seeing my posts about this, but you guys can easily unfollow me because i will never stop trying to stop blatant art theft whenever i see it. tho i always do things privately, at this point i have no choice because they have chosen to just keep posting art while ignoring the artists and their wishes. i don’t think i need to explain much from our messages above. i also don’t think i should keep quiet about this.

whenever i message people about reposts, more often than not, it’s just an honest mistake. i’m always grateful to the people i’ve sent messages to in the past (re: taking down stolen art) who were really understanding. it creates a lot of anxiety for me to keep messaging people-- not knowing how they’re going to react, but i still do it because it’s the right thing to do.

now this person has blatantly shown she doesn’t care what the artists think of her posting their work. after my last message, i waited for her to reply, but instead she posted more stolen art and this:

i guess this is supposed to justify her just wanting to post whatever she wants without asking the artist or respecting their wishes when they say ‘do not repost / please ask for permission first’.

now, going back to their message to me, they also sent me a link about hypocrisy. and here it is:

i actually have an idea about who this might be. i remember sending some people copy/paste messages asking them to take down a helios fanart because the artist said so + it was posted without permission. because of so many reposts, that artist has already deleted the aforementioned fanart from their twitter. it was a photo to be used for her friend’s story.

please read everything under the cut because this is important.

besides calling an artist a hypocrite for wanting their art not posted anywhere else, this reposter blog also posted the twitter below, showing support. it has multiple stolen fanart. it’s mind-boggling how this can get 200+ retweets when it clearly says “stolen” ... GUYS. PLEASE.

do not support art theft. please just don’t. every time i see stolen art, it just makes me sad. it makes me not want to be on this site. please. i know you guys love pretty fanart, but please only reblog and support those who do it properly and those who protect the artists. do not reblog art posted without permission. this affects all artists. this affects all content makers when we allow people to feel entitled to anything they find on the internet. it also makes our fandom look bad.

if there is only a link or an artist name, that art is -stolen- / reposted without permission. do not reblog.

pinterest, zerochan, weheartit, etc are not supposed to be considered a source for fanart. do not use those sites as a justification for posting art without permission. DMCA LAWS EXIST. it’s just harder for foreign artists to lodge complaints because of accessibility, language barrier, etc. i know some artists who have lodged dmca take downs on tumblr, so please know, you really can’t just take someone’s work. besides, would it really kill to be respectful and mindful of others?

anyway, i’m just asking you guys not to reblog fanart from this person or anyone else who posts fanart without permission. do not send them hate or abuse. they’re free to think that way, and we’re also free to warn others not to support art theft. this is the first time i’ve had to name names because there really was no other way for me to protect the artists’ interests without outing the blog name. i’m sorry.

btw, if this is even important, apparently i’m not the first person to message them about art theft. they just really don’t want to listen.

please also read:

@saizoswifey ‘s post.

other posts explaining art theft: here and here. and the pinned post on my blog.

#art theft #psa #mr love: queen's choice #mlqc #love and producer #恋与制作人 #sourced mrlove fanart #my friend said i wrote this without stars or hearts or smiles #friend: huh. must be serious.#me: lol sorry. i felt the mood was different?#kirohertreasure #blackswanqueen_

676 notes · View notes

canimal · 3 years

Text

There is a real person behind every single story you read.

Maybe the world has gotten colder and more impersonal or the pandemic has made everyone suspicious of everyone and see other people as enemies. Or it could be the On-Demand, Netflix-binging consumption that’s made even kind people turn selfish in their demands for more content. But Fandom isn’t as much fun as it used to be.

I’m old enough to remember when this was a place to feel safe to share your creations with other fans who were just as excited to read them. It was a community, a place you could feel like you belonged when the real world got hard. For many of us, it was an escape.

I miss those days. Am I the only one who feels like it’s all changed?

2018 was the HARDEST year of my entire life. Sorry, 2020 and 2021, y’all have NOTHING on 2018, at least in my personal experience. Every single day was a struggle to put one foot in front of the other. I can’t tell you how many times I HAD to write just to give me something to keep my mind occupied. Fandom was my escape. Even after I got caught up in some ridiculous nastiness more than once when the petty drama that always seems to follow a group of any people existing in the same space couldn’t avoid me, I had a place I could find joy and safety and a sense of belonging.

It’s not something I like to talk about (or even remember) but my year of shit bled into the early half of 2019 too. At my absolute lowest point of my entire life, literally and not hyperbolically, on the edge of a full emotional nervous breakdown, I was lost and struggling for something to hold on to to keep my head above water. Perhaps I put too much hope and faith in Fandom that should have been directed elsewhere more capable of handling it.

One hateful comment I wasn’t expecting pushed me over the edge. It was embarrassing. Now I can look back cringing with red cheeks and think, “Wow, that was an overreaction, dumbass”, but at the time I just wanted to run far away. An ordinary day when I wasn’t so fragile, I could’ve just rolled my eyes and moved on. But I wanted OUT. I wanted to run away from Fandom, forget it ever existed, and live far, far away from it.

I deleted all of my stories. Almost immediately I knew I made a mistake, but my stubborn nature made me dig in my heels and say “Fuck it. I want to leave. I want to move on with my life.” That was the only way it seemed possible at the time.

I didn’t expect the bombardment of messages I received after that over the next 24 hours. Almost entirely from people I’d never heard from before or spoken to, they were requests for me to send them PDFs of my stories or demands that I repost them because they were in the middle of reading them. A few audacious souls even asked if they could “adopt” my WIPs and finish them for me the way they wanted to finish them. Some messages were from kind readers expressing concerns about me and my well-being, but the overwhelmingly majority of them were from strangers demanding more, more, MORE!

It made me feel reduced to nothing but a machine whose sole purpose was to churn out more content for ungrateful, spoiled, selfish brats to consume more stories for which they would never even offer a simple “thank you” in return. All of the late nights I stayed up forgoing the sleep I loved (and needed) to finish another chapter were for nothing. The hours and hours I could’ve spent with my family and friends instead of in front of my computer were for nothing. It was all for nothing.

Maybe a day passed before I recovered all of the stories because I couldn’t imagine going through another minute of my FFN inbox, my Tumblr Asks, and my FB Messenger blowing up with messages from strangers demanding my stories. It was too much. All I wanted was to be left alone. Clearly that wasn’t the way to go about it.

Then when I recovered the stories, MORE messages came through except they were decidedly less friendly than “Yo, The Minister’s Secret is gone. Send me a pdf. I was in the middle of it.” These messages were full of vitriol about what a disgusting human being I was. One Ask I remember responding to (still cringing when I think about it - both the content of the ask and my response) accused me of doing it all for attention and I should be ashamed of myself. (I didn’t respond kindly which I’m still a little embarrassed by, but I still stand by most of what I said… barring most of the expletives.) Most of the Asks were deleted without comment, but wow, I still occasionally get a doozy!

I lost a lot of readers after that. Even more potential readers, I’m sure. It’s something I regret. It makes me sad sometimes to think about someone I know who won’t even talk to me now because of that particular incident. I know there are others who didn’t appreciate my horribly embarrassing moment of weakness. I wish I could take that whole incident back, but sadly, there’s no “Undo” button in life.

My reputation, which in some corners of the fandom already wasn’t very good, suffered a lot. I get it. I really do. Of course I understand actions have consequences. There were plenty of other less drastic and harmful decisions I could’ve made in that moment. I wasn’t thinking clearly and wish I could’ve just stepped away from my keyboard for a few days.

I’ve never wanted to talk about this because I’m still embarrassed even 2 1/2 years later. A lot of changes have gone on in my life since then that have made me a more emotionally stable, happy human being that I wish I could’ve been back then.

My whole point on writing this rambling post is because I want to remind everyone that even if the Fandom has changed, the people haven’t. There’s a human being behind every story, every fanart, every fan blog, every review - a human being with their own struggles and weaknesses and crises. We can’t afford to forget that.

You literally don’t know if your one word of encouragement is what is helping a person who is struggling take the next step forward or if your callous rudeness or indifference is the last straw for another.

The world is mean and nasty, but that doesn’t mean we have to be too. Fandom is an escape.

#be kind always #ramblings #I didn’t want to talk about this but maybe I should #be kind to creators #fandom is supposed to be fun #we are all in this together

14 notes · View notes

barnabyleeofslytherin · 3 years

Text

Now I know this one'll come as a shock to everyone(haha), but I don't post on this blog much anymore. And I know very well that I don't owe any of you apologies or really explanations for that manner, since, as I'm sure you're all aware, JKR isn't a very good person, and it's reasonable to assume that, many people would wanna distance themselves from her and her work after some not-so-recent thing's she's said and done.

But I would still like to simply come out and generally share the reasons why I'm not quite as active on this blog as I may once have been. I'm on mobile and I haven't slept for about 24 hours(it's around 6am), so I apologise for mistakes and formatting;

First and foremost, I, the Mod, am a gay man. I had started this blog almost as soon as Hogwarts mystery came out (some time around May of 2018 iirc, when I was graduating highschool), and back then I was maybe one of a small handful of gay men in the entire fandom. Back then, being what felt to me, like the only gay man surrounded by a sea of heterosexual and bisexual women felt very alienating to me. I had wanted to interact with people who, like me, were also gay men. I was happy to interact with people who viewed themselves to be women too, of course, but I was often made uncomfortable by these individuals due in part to them being very pushy towards me about how they wanted to date Barnaby.

Second, I'm a Trangender Man. Regardless of if JKR really actively despises my specific group in the transgender community or not, isn't up for debate. She's expressed her opinions on Trans Women, and I stand with my trans siblings(the transgender version of TERFS excluded, I believe they're called Transmeds?) Because of this, I cannot in good conscious, continue to support JRK or the Hogwarts franchise as a whole.

Third, I'm in my early 20s now. When I made this blog, I was a few months off of graduating high school, and a whopping 17 years of age. I'm going to be 21 in less than a month, and I wholeheartedly believe Barnaby and Co. to be children. Hell, they're around 16 in the game now last I'd heard, and while the legal age of consent in Alberta Canada states that 16 year olds can date up to 5 years older, I still cannot force myself to see these children as anything but children. I've lived a lot more life since I first played the game, there's such a gap of life experience between me and an 18 year old of today. These kids are barely older than my little brother. And with there being so much focus on the romantic aspect of the game(again, from what I've seen), I can't comfortably continue playing. (<- Read through it again and I wanna add on to this, I just do not find children attractive in the slightest, as I'm a normal person, who rightfully hates p*dos, and I will block anyone who claims it's okay to be romantically attracted to a child. From a survivor of childhood s*xual ab*se, it's not okay.)

Fourth, my interests and life have changed a lot since I was 17. I'm not interested in Harry Potter anymore, I'm not interested in working with animals anymore. I still love animals, but it's not a career path I want to work. I'm hoping to be a Certified Embalmer within the next year and a half. I just want to pursue adulthood, and become healthy again. I'd even started seeing a therapist before the pandemic to work though my survivors guilt and more. There's a new addition to my family coming later this July(child of my cousin), and one of my Uncles was found dead at 35 literally yesterday (June 20th 2021). I need to be here for my family, and running this blog when I was still active had become a chore.

Sometimes when I get a new notification from this blog, I'll consider deleting it, but this blog was a major part of who I was for about a year. I don't want to just delete it and act as though Harry Potter and the blog weren't major parts of my life, because they were, but they aren't anymore. I plan to leave this blog up, but not use it anymore, as I'd been doing for however many months by now. I will still follow some of my old friends who I'd met through the fandom, because I appreciate the friendship they provided me.

Thank you for bearing with the bone tired, and likely nonsensical ramblings of an almost 21 year old ex-RPer. I mean no harm nor offence to anyone with this post (except jkr) and I genuinely wish everyone still here all the best.

I will be scheduling this post to repost every 6 hours for the rest of today and tomorrow (June 21-22), sorry if it clogs your dashes, I'll tag it with "Scheduled post" for you to block.

~Mod Bennett, the only mod of this blog.

#long post #mod talks #death mention #p*do mention

20 notes · View notes

yourehomesickiunderstand · 3 years

Text

About/Rules/Verses

Hello, and welcome to my Bofur RP blog. This post is a HUGE wall of text, if you are on desktop and would like to see it a little tidier, please see the separate pages in the sidebar to the right.

Promo Post Found Here

About the Mun

1. Firstly I am over 30, own a house, have a husband, 1 baby, 2 cats, and a wealth of commitments and responsibilities. I will do my best to reply in a timely manner, but will state up front that sometimes life gets in the way.

2. I am in EST and work M-F from 9-5, plus a half hour commute. Please understand that I can not post from work, and will not be posting during those times.

3. In addition, I am Mom to a very active toddler who is my priority over writing and who’s nap schedule tends to dictate when I can post.

4. My native language is English, though I can understand French, and a little bit of Spanish and Japanese. Don’t bank on me carrying on a decent conversation in any of those languages though.

About the Blog

1. When I first set up this blog I didn’t realize that secondary blogs can’t follow back, ask, or submit. My main blog name is Saffity, so if you see that blog follow you, it’s me. If I send an ask or submit, I will mention this blog name so you don’t get confused.

2. My inbox, ask, etc. is open. Please feel free to write me any starters, questions, or whatever.

3. Please send any critiques or suggestions to me. I’ve been on Tumblr forever, but have never really been a poster. If you see me doing basic noob mistakes with my posts that can be easily fixed, please let me know.

4. I will be tracking #yourehomesickiunderstand so please use that tag with our threads.

Mun’s Playing Style

1. I prefer my Bofur straight. I understand Boffins and other ships and have no qualms with them, I’ve been known to enjoy a good fluff fic once in a while, but this Bofur is straight.

2. Please send me an ask or fan mail if you would like our characters to have an already established relationship, I’m totally cool with it. I respond to all cannon characters as known as it shows in the books or movies, but if you are an OC and want something other than a “Nice to meet you” please let me know first.

3. I’m willing to do some fluffies, but not full on smut, if the thread calls for smut (which will often happen), I’ll fade to black when I’ve gone as far as I feel comfortable with. (Don’t worry, I’ll fade when I’m ready, you’ll never get any angry messages from me about going too far.)

4. Bofur here is multiverse, au, indie, whatever you want to call it. I’m sure he’ll fit into whatever crossover or world you decide to drop him in, he’s very easy going after all.

5. I tend to write in the past tense, third person. If you’d prefer a different style, just let me know and I’ll try to accommodate.

6. I’m bad with my images, so bad! I’m still figuring everything out, so if I’ve royally screwed something up, please let me know and I will delete and repost correctly.

7. I am super okay with editing anything I write if it doesn’t jive with your character or where you want the plot to go, please just let me know.

8. I mainly play on mobile, as such, I’m not able to cut my posts down. Please do so whenever you feel the need/want, I won’t be upset.

Head Cannons that go across all verses

1. Bofur has a Northern Irish accent and his hat, always his hat.

2. Bofur has named his hat Bundushathur, which in Khuzdul means “Cloudyhead” and will sometimes refer to his hat as a sleeping rabbit. If Khuzdul does not exist in the verse (like Modern) then the hat is called Cloudyhead and still referred to as a rabbit.

3. Bofur is the everyman, he isn’t special or high born. He is good natured, friendly, and the world’s best wingman, even if it means connecting someone he pines after with someone else. He would rather see them happy and keep their friendship than try to force his feelings on them or lose their friendship because of his pride.

4. The main characteristic about Bofur is that he is unimportant in the hierarchy of society.

Main Verse - The Hobbit/LOTR

Bofur is 4'6" but fairly thin for a dwarf.

Bofur is a dwarf who’s family line comes from Moria. He is of the mining class. He was born and raised in Ered Luin with his brother. Shortly after Bofur became an adult, his parents died, leaving him to raise his brother. Shortly after that, Bifur was injured in an orc attack. Bofur and Bombur took Bifur in, however there were a number of difficult years as they all got used to Bifur’s new personality.

Once Bifur was stable enough, the brothers decided it would be a good idea to head out and find new customers for their skills. They ended up at Bree, opening up a shop to sell Bifur’s fabulous toys, and offer tinkering services.

During their stay in Bree, Bombur got married to a passing female dwarf and moved his overly large family near the shop. Bifur and Bofur live together in living quarters at the back of the shop, Bombur lived with them until he got married.

Bofur travels around Middle Earth, usually west of the Misty Mountains, and most often between Bree and Ered Luin by way of the Shire. He collects supplies, sells wares, and visits many friends and family that are about the lands.

When Thorin calls for assistance in taking back Erebor, Bofur and his kin lock up their shop and head for the Shire.

After the quest they settle in Erebor, though Bofur heads back to Bree to close up their shop and settle accounts prior to settling in for a long life of enjoying his 14th share of the treasure.

Head Cannons that can totally change if my partner is a Bifur or Bombur

1. Bofur’s father was killed in Moria at the battle of Azanulbizar, his Mother died in an Orc attack when Bofur was in his 40s. He has taken care of his brother ever since.

2. Bofur took Bifur in after Bifur was orphaned as well, the three are like brothers, having shared the experience of loss and growing up together.

3. Bombur stopped speaking after their mother died. Bofur’s tried to get him to speak, and has managed to get him to speak sometimes, but usually just small replies and often with much prodding. Bifur and Bombur use the same sign language to speak to each other and those who don’t speak Khuzdul. Bofur takes care of both of them and is the one who speaks to customers.

Modern Verse

High School

Bofur is not popular, though he’s friendly and basically knows everyone. He enjoys shop class, classical music, and historical literature.

Studious and hard working, Bofur can often be found with his nose in a book, when not sitting on the bleachers playing the tin flute he always has on him.

College Student

Bofur is a TA in college. His major is historical literature, and his goal is to eventually become a professor. His passion is delving into historical fanatasy from cultures other than England and Western Europe.

He enjoys learning languages in order to read what he is researching in its original state.

General Modern Adult

In most modern adult verses Bofur is a general labourer, most often a janitor. If he is a teacher, he teaches music and drama.

Ice Cream Shop

Bofur runs a small home made ice cream shop that is part of a coffee shop run with a companion or family member (his partner can be any member of the company). He makes a variety of flavours, and offers lactose and gluten free varieties.

He prides himself on being able to guess his customers’ favourites on sight (like the movie Chocolat).

Marvel

Bofur is a janitor within shield. He can be found on the helicarrier, within the Avengers training base, or basically anywhere the heroes may be destroying things that need to be cleaned up.

While he is quiet and without powers, he has wisdom and a patient ear to lend to those supers who require a moment to vent.

Star Trek

This is the only verse where Bofur stands out. Bofur is a red shirt, but by some miraculous turn of events, he has gone on a number of away missions and made it back alive. Poor Bofur would love to get off the enterprise with his life, and shirt, in tact, but it appears some of the higher officers like to see him lose his mind and suggest him for more away missions, even if only in jest.

Head cannons that exist in all modern verses

1. Bofur and his family are from Northern Ireland, though Bofur travels around, goes to school abroad, and in general can pop up anywhere in the world.

2. Bofur is short for a male - 5'6", with a stocky build, and fairly strong.

3. Bofur’s younger brother Bombur is still at home (or married with kids depending on their age).

4. Bofur’s parents took Bifur in after he got injured during Armed Forces training, as Bofur’s family lives closer to the rehab resources that Bifur requires.

#out of songs

9 notes · View notes

imagines-fr-days · 4 years

Text

Abandoned (Obi-wan Kenobi x Sith!reader)

A/N!!!! I have no idea what the fuck happened but my original post deleted itself when I was making edits and honestly im peeved about it. luckily I had it saved to my phone. so I’m reposting this.

I’ve been on a Star Wars kick recently and I had to do something for the first love of my nerdy ass life, Obi-Wan Kenobi. something angsty because I love making people be sad and suffer before the redemption. 😈 I already started writing a Part 2 so lemme know if you guys want it cuz its a twisty doozy.

I don’t think there’s any warnings I should announce. just Angst because lets be real, if you aren’t angsty are you even a Sith?? Obi-wan being too good for this universe but also a badass.

“Darth Wraithous, I have a task for you. A true test of your abilities.”

So that is what lead you here, leading a droid army, waiting for a Jedi. Sidious wanted to test your loyalty and you abilities. facing a Jedi. what was so different about this Jedi you didnt know. you’d killed one before and fought many others.

“Ma’am, we have republic tanks on our scanners coming in from the west.” The commander droid alerted you.

“Let them come. I have a score to settle with the Jedi.” You sighed.

“Roger roger.” The droid left.

“First squadron, fan out to flank them, do not engage until given my order.” You could begin to see the tops of the tanks through the alien trees.

“We’re in position, Ma’am.” the droid came through the communicator, “should we open fire?”

“Wait.” You growled through the comms, “wait.”

You could see the first line of clones clearly, the Jedi not far behind for sure.

“Open fire.” You smirked, you jumped from the command ship, wielding your red saber as you ran towards the clones, deflecting each blaster shot fired towards you with ease. The feeling of severing limbs from bodies released a wave of pride over your nerves.

“General Kenobi! Sith!” A clone shouted. Kenobi? No. You thought as anger spread through your body. Sidious wanted you to kill Obi-wan. He knows, Panic set into your chest.

“Leave him to me, commander!” The voice that was over the recorder was so familiar but so different. The distant sounds of a saber drew closer, you swung towards more clones, jumping up onto a tank, the blade of your saber severing the canon.

You jumped from the tank and deflected shots from clones.The hum of a saber appeared behind you, “Hello there.” The voice caused chills to go up your spine.

You deactivated your saber and force pushed back the clones, and the Jedi, around you, taking off into the wooded area across the path. Your ship not far away so you ran for it, jumping through the thick vines and trunks of trees. Sliding down slopes, Jumping over a ridge you spotted the black machine in the distant clearing. You took a deep breath and made the walk towards the ship.

You heard a thud behind you. You paused.

“There is only one person I’ve ever seen move the way you just did….” The familiar warm voice echoed in your ears, “So the stories are true. You turned to the dark side…”

You stood with your back to the Jedi, unable to turn and look into his face for the first time in years.

“Please tell me it’s not true, (y/n).”

The anger boiled within you instantly, “(Y/n) was weak. She’s dead.” You growled at the mention of your old name.

“And you killed her?” You felt his presence draw closer.

“I’m still killing her.” You snapped, finally turning face to face with the love of your life, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

A gasp escaped his lips at the sight of your once welcoming (e/c) irises replaced with a soul piercing red and gold. His eyes were sad but he’d aged wonderfully, looking more handsome than you remember, he’d grown a beard. Small wrinkles at the corner of his eyes. the same beige tunic but incased in armor baring the symbol of the Jedi order, the same attitude-filled stance. The blueness of his eyes hadn’t changed in nearly 10 years. The sight of Master Kenobi finally in front of you did nothing to lessen the pain in your chest.

“This isn’t you.. we’ve known each other since we were younglings.” Obiwan frowned, shaking his head.

“You don’t know me anymore, Kenobi.” You could feel the tears brewing; after years of being held back, the appearance of the man who sent you down this dark path made them impossible to contain.

“You know that’s not true. I know you better than you know yourself. You don’t want this.” Obi-wan pressed, “Please.. Come back with me.” he reached his hand towards you. You’d never wanted to grasp something so badly in your whole life. but you couldn’t, not yet. you shook the thoughts from your head as quickly as they appeared, anger refilling the space.

“You don’t know what I want! Did you forget what happened when I left the order?” You growled, gripping your saber that was holstered at your side. Obi-wan quickly retrieved his own from his belt.

“Of course I haven’t! It was the worse day of my life.” Obi-wan winced.

——————————————————————————————-

“Leave the order with me, Obi.” You held your hand out. Deep down you wanted Obi-wan to take your hand and leave with you but you knew he wouldn’t.

Obi-wan looked down at your hand and back to meet your eyes, slowly shaking his head, “I can’t. We gave an oath to the Jedi!”

“Can’t you see they’re tyrants! They’re forcing you to suppress your feelings for me. I feel them in you.” You could feel the sadness overwhelming Obi-wan, your hand grasping onto his only to have Obi-wan quickly pull back. Your heart shattering, “We could be together, Obi-wan. We wouldn’t have to hide. You loved me once…”

“We were young and foolish.” He frowned, turning away. The ache in your chest became overwhelming, with tears in your eyes and your lips trembling against each other, you drew your saber and ignited the green blade, “You give me no other choice…”

“Please don’t.” Obi-wan whimpered.

You ignored his plea and pounced. After years of practicing with each other you knew every move of his, every secret. And he knew yours. With every attack and block of the sabers, every ear scratching screech of ever collision, your heart broke more. Tears cascading down your cheeks, Obi-wan’s face held no emotion other than his furrowed brows.

Obi-wan caught you by surprise when he noticed your attention falter from the duel, a burning sensation overtook your face. You gripped the left side of your cheek in pain, stumbling back… too far back. You felt a drop but something grabbed your arm. You looked up to see Obi-wan clenching to your wrist.

“Give me your other hand, (y/n)!” His voice cracked over the roar of speeders passing under you, “please!” He reached down.

You simply shook your head, “let me go.”

“Please don’t. Don’t leave me!” A single tear cascaded down his cheek.

You looked at him, mesmerizing his features, you knew it would be a long time until you could see him again. The dimple in his chin, the crease between his eyebrows that appeared when he narrowed his brows, the curve of his jawline, his soft and welcoming eyes.

You pressed your foot against the wall of the temple, “I love you, Obi.” You forced a smile before pushing off the wall, your hand slipping through Obi-wan’s grasp.

The last thing you heard was Obi-wan’s scream as you fell.

——————————————————————————————-

You blinked away the memory, shaking your head. You looked back up to the Jedi, more angry now than ever.

“Please… don’t make me do this.” Obi-wan regretfully activated his saber.

“You won’t have the chance.” You force gripped Obi-wan by the neck, hoisting him into the air. He dropped his saber to claw at his empty neck. “I loved you, Obi-wan! I loved you more than anything! You were the love of my life and you abandoned me!” You squeezed as hard as you could. Obi-wan was gasping for breath. Terrified eyes met your own.

“Please, (y/n).” It was barely above a whisper but his words pierced into your chest and straight to your broken heart.

You released a thunderous growl as you hurled Obi-wan backwards, releasing the hold on his throat. As he coughed you pulled his lightsaber towards you with the force, using your own saber to slice the hilt of Obiwan’s into pieces.

The love you once felt for him replaced with hatred and anger. Obi-wan’s eyes, that you once loved more than any part of him, only fueled the hatred for him.

You took a deep breath and glared down at the Jedi, “I may have loved you, Obi-wan. But the next time I see you. I will kill you. Make no mistake of that.”

You turned your back to Obi-wan, the blue glow of his Kyber Crystal catching your attention. You bent down, pulling it from the burnt metal and clenched It in your palm. You other hand grazing the scar, staring from your forehead, just above the left eyebrow and drawing your finger down it’s path to your jaw.

You stepped on your ship, turning back to see obi-wan standing as the door closed

#repost #obi-wan kenobi #obi wan x reader #obi-wan x sith!reader #obi-wan x you #general kenobi #the clone wars #clone wars #clone wars kenobi #phantom menace #attack of the clones #revenge of the Sith #sith!reader #Jedi x sith #ewan mcgregor #daddy-wan kenobi

103 notes · View notes

cap-cavern · 4 years

Text

Response

Answer: I feel uncomfortable with people following Fallan because it makes me feel bad and stir up horrible memories. I admit I wasn’t thinking or considering the different opinions or reactions people will have, but I was trying to keep myself sane by not following the same people who follow her. I acknowledged that what I did is wrong and I didn’t think of the consequences; I take full responsibility for it and I’m sorry.

Answer: While I was jealous, I couldn’t control my destructive behavior before. It wasn’t intentional, I should've gotten help before but no one irl was there around me unlike today, and I made her feel this way, so I acknowledge and apologize for it.

Answer: I understand this is a personal problem, and I apologize for bringing it up. But, please keep in mind that we are allowed to vent to the people who annoy us or make us feel bad. My entire personality is not venting about you; I have my own relationship to focus on now and he noticed that I’ve been venting less and less about you. The part that triggers it mostly happens whenever I receive death threats from the people who claim as your friends. It started with one message after our last message three years ago, but it kept on occurring so many times that how could I not panic as well? How can I not know if these anonymous death threats are from her or from her mutuals? I’ve never even sent any death threats like these to her, from what I remembered.

Trigger warning: death threats

Answer: I was banned from specord. I admit I went back to instagram and made a safe space for myself. People are allowed to talk negatively about the people they dislike or the people who hurt them, but I talk about these things privately. A lot of people discuss similar situations such as these, even in public servers, yet why was it not mentioned in the post? Speaking of, that screenshot you got, claiming from a public server, is actually a private friend group server. I believe that was misunderstood, and I couldn’t blame you for misunderstanding, but please have an open mind that I would be banned from a public server if I ever did such things.

Answer: I was advised to tell you to find people who don’t know me so they can easily believe you and defend you to what you do. I understand you want your friends back, but you can’t control people from coming back to you. Isn’t this the lesson you want me to learn? I was punched in the gut when I learned this. Maybe it’s time to accept it and move on. I lost people, you lost people too. It’s part of life, and it’s something we have to accept. It’s weird that this came from me, but this is the lesson you want me to learn. I’m sorry you couldn’t get them back, and I acknowledge that. But, take a leaf from your book as well.

Answer: As I said earlier, I admit and acknowledged that I was like that before. I acknowledged that behavior and realized it was wrong. My emotions got the best of me, preventing me to think clearly and making the right decisions to behave nicely.

Answer: As I said earlier, it wasn’t my intention to do it. I acknowledged what I did was wrong and I take full responsibility for it. It wasn’t my intention, things just went out of hand and I apologize for it, I genuinely do.

Answer: While I don’t have proofs that I actually committed suicide irl, it was never my intention to suicide bait her. I acknowledged what I did wrong and take full responsibility of it. But, I want to make it clear that I did do it more than once irl.

Answer: I’m not sure about her but I have a lot of screenshots of death threats that have been going on for these past years and still going on from her friends. I’ve been in this situation of threats, blocks, etc. While it’s easy to block and move on, I can’t control these people for sending such threats time and time again. If you don’t believe me when I say it’s from her friends, here’s just a few of the many examples of threats I’ve gotten not just on discord but from other social media as well so there’s nowhere I can go A recent one being after getting a commission gift someone gave me and claiming to take and repost it. The artist was of course upset about this since it was a gift. It’s also quite clear that sometimes it’s even the same mutual sending these. It’s gotten to the point where they even mention attacking me in irl. So, I ask, why shouldn’t I feel paranoid about all these threats?

Trigger warning: death threats

Answer: I acknowledged that what I did was wrong, and again, it wasn’t my intention. I take full responsibilities that I couldn’t control myself. However, I can’t quite graph who’s the “they hated how I was popular”. I remember her mentioning she was popular on tumblr, and she seems quite confident about it so I assumed she was completely okay with people and myself mentioning that. I apologize, but I wasn’t really that annoyed. They were quite popular. I might have expressed it wrongly, and I take full responsibility for that. I’m sorry.

Answer: I could’ve been a better friend too. I could’ve been not jealous. I could’ve been less destructive. I could’ve controlled my emotions. I could’ve done something better, and not the worst things, but that was all in the past. I stopped thinking about my friendship with her last years, and it’s been consistent even with some good changes for myself until I received a death threat. We’re not the same people as we were before, so, stop lingering in the past. You told me to move on, and it had taken me a while to do so, you should do it too. Take a leaf from your own book, and move on too. That’s what I’ve been doing, but the death threats are blocking that path.

Answer: Yes, I do understand that you received criticisms too, but I received criticisms about this situation as well. I’ve been criticized for being the bad guy, too, just as you have, and I have to carry the pain in my back as well. There will always be people who will think you’re a good person or the bad person in situations like these; it’s all black and white. People have different opinions, you can’t control what people will think and criticize in this situation. People will point fingers and one will think you’re a good guy whilst the other will think you’re a bad guy; we just have to accept that. Doing the right thing doesn’t mean you can’t be criticized for it. People are allowed to hate you even if you did the right thing. You will be pointed out as a bad person even if you did the right thing. It’s just the way things are and we can’t control that.

Answer: People have. I tried. I willingly tried to. One blocked me on twitter when I mentioned how uncomfortable I am that they follow you, I wanted to be safe and not make any violent reactions when seeing this. It scares me. I learned to accept that the hard way.

Answer: I only deleted those DMs (parts of it) because I don’t wanna linger in those messages. I wanna move on. I wanna move forward; that’s the reason why I deleted them. I don’t wanna be reminded that I did the horrible things I did my best to learn from and move on.

Answer: I have stopped contacting you ever since I was forced and persuaded to talk to you last December 2018. Let’s move on. Let’s try to be civil and move on. You told me many times to move on, and while I refused at first, I eventually learned and accepted that I should move on. I understand you are still frustrated; I get frustrated too, and I’m sorry for making you feel this way and everything I did.

Answer: This came from a private friend server, not a public server. It’s a close-friend server made by another user when I was banned. They gave me the ownership afterwards because it was “made for me”. I don’t know how you got the screenshot, but please, keep in mind that this is from a private friend server with several people in it. It doesn’t even have 100 people in total, let alone 50 or 40. And, to clear things out, I was like that before, but not now. People change over time, and trust me, looking at this message is making me cringe because I hate the fact that I was like this. I’m doing what I can to change that.

Answer: It’s from a dream; a nightmare, and it’s something I can’t control, especially with all those threats that I kept on getting. I reacted to the situation so badly in the past, but now, in the present, I don’t often get dreams or nightmares like that anymore. Please, understand how sorry I am with these. Long ago, you told me to move on, and I am doing it now. I did do it, but this wouldn’t end if we just continue like this. I understand the things I did were wrong; I acknowledged it. We are all human beings who make mistakes from time to time. We either dwell on those mistakes, or learn from it. It’s our choice in the end. This endless finger pointing has been going on too long now and i wish for it to end. Again, I’m sorry for everything that I have done, but have an open mind that you’re not the only one who suffered from this situation; we both did, and now, it’s time to move on, like you said before.

#cancel culture #callout #call out #call out culture #response #negative #trigger warning suicide #trigger warning death threats

10 notes · View notes

expelliarmus · 4 years

Text

I saw that ask meme with questions for gif makers going around, but I felt like answering them all on my own lmao

1. What are your top 3 favorite sets you’ve made

This one, this one (if the timing works lmao), and this one (I’m so proud of my AU gifsets... where did all that creativity go??)

2. What is your least favorite set you’ve made

I honestly don’t know... I don’t think I hate anything I’ve posted though. If I don’t like how it’s turning out, I just won’t post it lol

3. Which of your sets has the most notes

The most notes ever is this one I think

4. A set that flopped but deserved better

I don’t know... there’s a bunch, but I’m fine if a gifset flops

5. What is your favorite movie/TV show to gif

DOCTOR WHO

6. What is your least favorite movie/TV show to gif

I really don’t gif anything else lmao...

7. Who are your top 3 gif makers

I’ll just pick 3 people off the top of my head :) @shatner, @melodyspond, @stupidape

8. What gif trend do you hate

The pale/black and white gifs that are so hard to see.......

9. What/who inspired you to start making gifs

I wanted to gif my favourite parts of DW that I didn’t see anyone else doing, so I was like alrighty, time to learn how to do this!! I think the people that inspired me are long gone from tumblr, or I’m no longer following them because they’ve moved blogs (Natasha aka lumos-maxima... wherever you are, I MISS YOU... also Courtney aka needlebug I MISS YOU TOO)

10. What was the first gif you ever posted

THIS ONE! I remember being so happy about posting it, haha. Also, I still love that Confidential episode so much. I miss my space hipsters...

11. What is that one set you made that just won’t die

The Zoboomafoo one

12. What is the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever giffed

Everything I’ve ever posted

13. Where or from whom did you learn how to gif

Various tutorials on here and just by experimenting. I don’t even think I used Photoshop to begin with, since back in my Neopets days I used Paint Shop Pro to make graphics so I think that’s what I used first to try making gifs of videos.

14. How long does it usually take you to make a set

45 minutes to an hour or so?? It’s been taking longer and longer because the screencaps are so huge though and my poor laptop can’t handle it.

15. Have you ever had gifs stolen and reposted

Yes, and don’t think that I can’t tell when those are my gifs, even without a watermark!!

16. How long have you been making gifs

Since 2011...... my god

17. 10 sets, 8 sets, 6 sets? How many gifs to you prefer in a set

As many as it takes!!!!! But usually between 6-8

18. For the aesthetic, for the laughs, or for the feels what your preference

For FUN!

19. What is your gifting process like

Open video, find scene, screencap, load screencaps in Photoshop, resize to gif dimensions, add colouring, curse myself for picking a hard-to-colour scene, continue adjusting colouring and become increasingly frustrated because it’s not turning out the way I want it to, give up, add text, save gif, POST!

20. Mac or PC

21. PSDs or original coloring for each gif

Original colouring. PSD who???

22. What fandom/movie/show/person etc do you gif the most

DOCTOR WHO and more specifically, David Tennant... I think his tag has the most :’)

23. What is the thing you gif when you don’t have anything else you want to gif

Any episode with Ten and Donna, or The Eleventh Hour, or the Day of the Doctor, or Blink

24. 480p 720p 1080p? What is the minimum quality you’ll gif from

I used to be all good with giffing 480p back in the day, but I guess now it’s 720p since the gif limits have gone way up.

25. Old dimensions or new dimensions and why

New dimensions because they look nicer on the dashboard.

26. How many un posted sets are in your drafts right now

ZERO.

27. Have you ever made a set, decided you hated it and deleted it? What was it

Probably at least one or twice, but I don’t remember.

28. Have you ever posted a set, regretted it and immediately deleted it

No, I don’t think so. I’m leaving my mistakes there for all to see!

29. Have you ever posted a set, realized you made a mistake later but it was already too late

Yes, I did this just the other day with that Missy, Bill and Nardole set. I got the dialogue slightly wrong lmao..... shh

30. How frequently do you like to post

I try to do at least one gifset a day if I can!

31. Do you schedule/queue posts or do you post right after you’re done

Right away. These gifsets are fresh off the grill.

32. What is your favorite tool/adjustment layer in Photoshop

Selective Color or Color Balance

33. Do you like to/can you make edits and graphics too or only gifs

Yes, I can do both but gifs are way more fun imo

34. A set that took you a long time/was really hard but you’re really proud of how it came out

I’m gonna say this one again because I was so proud of it when I made it, and I can’t believe I used to put that much effort into my gifs.

35. Do you change your giffing style a lot or do you have a set routine

I have a routine, as described above. My gifs are pretty much all made the same way as I describe in my colouring tutorial too.

36. Do you gif with something specific in mind or do you just wing it

Usually a mixture of both. I like to try to gif a different Doctor each day, so I’ll know who I have in mind but I’m not planning on a specific episode. I’ll just open up one of their series and go from there!

37. What sets if any do you have planned to make in the future

Idk, I was thinking of doing yet another gifset with Donna in it since I just finished her Big Finish series... but maybe I’ll do one with Eleven and the Ponds??? We’ll see.

38. What are you really excited to gif that isn’t out yet

The next Doctor Who holiday special?? :D

39. How often, if ever, do you delete old sets that you don’t like anymore

Never!! I love seeing how my gifs have slowly changed and improved over time.

40. Why do you make gifs

Because it’s fun, and it’s a way for me to relax after a long and busy day at work.

41. What is your least favorite part about your gif making process

When it takes forever for my screencaps to load, and when it takes forever for my gifs to save sometimes

42. How is your gif folder organized? Is it organized at all?

Lol nope.

43. Do you keep videos forever or delete them once you’re done giffing

I keep the episodes forever, but honestly I think I keep everything forever because I forget about getting rid of the other stuff like trailers and interviews... I should go through my downloads folder.

44. Ever had a gif become a meme? Would you like that if you haven't

I’ve had people use my gifs as reaction gifs and it is a weird feeling, especially seeing the gifs being used on websites other than tumblr. I remember seeing one of my gifs used in someone’s book review on Goodreads and I was like “WAIT THAT LOOKS FAMILIAR!!”

45. Ever gotten hate over a set

Not really hate, but I do get a lot people that are like “WHERE IS ______?” in their tags. And sometimes I just want to be like “Make your own gifs if you think they should be there!!!”

46. Ever gotten a really sweet compliment over a set

Yes :’)

47. Any advice for novice gif makers/people who want to start making gifs

Don’t give up!! Make gifs of whatever makes you happy, don’t worry about the notes too much, and use your tags! KEEP PRACTICING!

48. How would you describe your giffing style

I don’t know??? If someone else has a way to describe my style, then please let me know haha

49. How much would you say you’ve improved since you first started giffing

It’s been almost 9 years since I’ve started, so I hope I’ve improved quite a bit! :P

Well, that was fun. Congrats on making it to the end of this post!!! Now I will go make a gifset.

#personal #i hope the read more works for mobile people lol

7 notes · View notes