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ladythornofrivia · 4 months

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MY SCAVENGER || Kylo Ren!Aemond x Rey!Reader

a/n: i’ve been thinking about what one-shot I should do next. Though I’m currently writing Saltburn fanfic, I love Star Wars. Even Reylo! Have fun reading! (Some dialogue in the beginning doesn’t belong to me. It belongs to the movie.)

warnings: interrogation, torture kink, lust at first sight, breeding kink, p in v sex, fight scene, violence, aemond has issues, loss of virginity, aemond is a d*ck, kink size, obsessive aemond, dom/sub, aemond not only uses the power of force on reader but also with his d*ck. Bl*wjob, degradation kink, creampie

pair: aemond x reader

Somewhere in the galaxy far away, the leader of the First Order, Aemond Targaryen, was hunting for the map that’ll lead him to Daemon Targaryen, the last Jedi ever existed. Or so he believed.

While Aemond knew the legends of his uncle and his journey as a Jedi warrior, but those who commanded under Aemond’s order and leadership, not a soul in a galaxy believed Daemon ever existed, not in the history textbooks or screens. The stormtroopers only meant to serve their skilled leader.

As young as he was, Aemond Targaryen is known for his cold and calculating nature. He kept his helmet on, under any circumstances, and wields a red lightsaber. Tall and lethal, no one really knew what he looked like—it left to the imagination far and wide, leading his troops picturing of his appearance. Aemond wouldn’t dare make his troops or his other commanding officers enter his private quarters.

In the galaxy, everyone feared him.

Until you.

A nobody living in the stories of galaxy.

Hunting for scraps and leftovers for the sake of small profit to keep on living. Finding rare scraps in Jakku, was meddlesome. A nightmare. Filled in stacks of desert sand and humid waves lingered and pierced your skin.

Deserted land has been your home. And in your home, inside the AT-AT Walker, after you scratch another tally mark on the metallic wall, you cooked a loaf of bread and fried vegetables and scraps of thin meat. You wondered when your life will begin anew with reborn purpose. A nobody, in the galactic space, hoped your family would return.

You hoped that your life isn’t meaningless.

Jakku has been destroyed; in chaos, you’re forced to leave—of taking refuge, but more companions in your journey agreed that Jakku is nothing but a junkyard, and there you met a legendary shooter and a Wookie Warrior. But the plans failed.

For Aemond Targaryen spotted the map to Daemon Tarygaryen’s location. But the expectant acquirance wasn’t the astromech, droid BB8, rather, something far more interesting.

Aemond captured you—after minutes of chase and defense in the thickened forest. “Bring the girl,” he ordered, as your body fell to unconsciousness by the force, as he carried you and fled away with his ship, brought you to the First Order base, entrapped in metal straps as soon as you woke up.

Luminous lights and thick air provoked your tightened lungs to breath and your skin had broken a perspiration.

The doors opened, unveiling a tall, dark figure between the gaps of archway. Stomping on his shoes echoed until became nothing.

“Where are the others?” you asked, rasping, eyes hazed.

“You mean the murderers, traitors and thieves and cravens you call friends,” he said, taunting, his voice was nearly a merry. “You’ll be in such a relief that I have no clue to where they are.”

The reflection of his mask stared back at you. “You still want to murder me—challenge me,” he assumed.

“Well, that’s what happens if you’ve been chased and captured by the monstrous creature in a mask,” you snapped, low voice laced with venom.

His mask has taken off, long silk strands of silver-blond hair flowed over his chest, as the violet eye and the substitution of his sapphire gleamed at you. For a second, you never thought that your captor is skilled fighter, but it’s also young—young and handsome. His milky skin aglow, a good correlation to his deep stone wedged on the empty socket of his amputated eye, lined with scar that is faded. Outline of his jaw sharpened, shadowed as he strode closer to you.

Thundered, his mask dropped at a nearby stand, the grey sand flew and dissipated as his lithe frame inched closer.

“The droid,” he said, almost frantic. “Tell me about the droid. I know the droid has the map to Daemon Targaryen. Ever heard of him?”

Looking at his eye, you shook your head, “Never heard of him,” you answered, the illuminated lights flashed over your eyelids each time you blinked.

Aemond inched his face closer. “Your heart beat is pounding awfully loud.”

“Must be the heat,” you retorted.

He chuckled. “What a clever liar you are. But not clever enough. Now, tell me about the droid.”

“He’s a BB Unit with a Selenium Drive with a Thermal Hyperscan Vindicator.”

“It’s carrying a navigational chart, which the droid possesses the map.” His head tilted. “You, a scavenger, living on Jakku—a deserted planet with nothing to offer.” His face leaned closer. “You know I can take what I want.”

You swallowed, eyes flicking at his smooth pink-colored lips.

“My,” he said, licking his lower lip. “It appears you have some sort of interest in me, showed no signs of fear.”

You looked away, face reddened from the strict heat in the room and the huskiness in his voice. His hand outreached to your side temple, though no contact. You felt the Force strengthened and battled against the mobility of your system.

“You’re lonely. Alone and desperate. Waiting for someone to show up and rescue you. Waiting for someone to lead you out from the land, from the galaxy and into the great land with trees and life. I can sense the anger…not only that…something far more…delicate…in the matter based on your compromising position,” he cooed.

You resisted, of course, but your energy drained quicker.

His body leaned back, taking a good look of your exasperated form. “Tell you what, I’ll release you, but only if you can give something to me, in one condition.”

You (e/c) locked onto his. “And what would that be?”

Only the corners of Aemond’s lips curled.

“Please, no,” you begged, wrists tied up behind your back while Aemond was sitting on a spare chair, his thick and lithe legs spread wide while you’re in between them, knees already hurting.

“Shhh, trust me, my little scavenger,” he cooed again, his gloved hand flattened behind your head and dragged it downward. “So, are you going to be my good woman, or do I have show you the force again?”

Gulping, you succumbed at his voice. Maybe another way of his “force”.

“Good woman,” he praised, and unzipped his black trousers, his long and thick cock sprung out it nearly hit your cheek below the eye. “Sorry, darling, my cock couldn’t help but to view at the sight of you,” he said, smirking, tugging your locks, hauling you closer to his engorged tip, leaking. Your lips opened, taken his length in, choking. It felt as if your eating a whole uncut rod—or a thicker lightsaber. “All trapped underneath me, my power. The force within can’t abide much later.”

Gagging proceeded in your throat, but you took his length in precarious and fervent care.

“That’s it,” he groaned, his other hand flicked, the force brought your head down further to the end of his swollen cock, his large balls. “Argh! That’s…it.”

It was impressive for him to not only deal with a woman with capable resistance, but also has a coy nature she has been hiding—a tease.

The force no longer hostage you; your mouth watered as you took his cock well, swallowing the taste of his flesh, his warm flesh. Oh, how delightful. You never dealt a Jedi or a commander to have desirable or naughty urges. But you figured that even the force cannot contain beastly urges of a man. Aemond was one. But, has he ever been a woman before you? Jealousy pitted down on your heated belly, flickering.

It felt so wrong, but, your heart was aching for him, despite “meeting” under the matters of selfish urgency and a brink of death.

Aemond sighed, his silver-blond locks befallen on his broad and lean backside, his throat bobbed, heaving and sighing at your warm and slick mouth.

“Your thoughts are troubling you again,” he said. “No, I have never been with a woman.”

You doubted. Tortured at the thought of a previous woman, a torture where a previous woman might do better than you—an inexperienced scavenger.

“I never lie,” he said. His index finger flicked, and the hair ties on your head casted, your longish locks flowed, nesrly covering up your breast. “In fact, I never did.”

Semen spurted in your slippery mouth.

“Take it all in, darling,” he encouraged, hearing your throat quenched its thirst, smothered in his slick and spurt of his thick semen.

The room became hotter as Aemond strapped your wrists above your head onto the prison bed.

“Stay still, woman,” he grunted, his lips inched downward to yours, seeing if the pace of his breath matched with yours.

Your chest steadied from a grasping breath you tried to behold with gentleness. Aemond sensed it, too.

“You’re steady…Good.” And plunged his suppled lips to yours, caging your soft ragged breaths, playing your tongue with his, heavy sighs played out in the air, his palm snuck in your cloth, smooth fingertips tracing the lines of your stomach, the soft steep of ribcage.

“With you under my protection, nothing can go wrong, little scavenger,” he said, his tucked hand withdrew, and flicked a sharp movement, and your clothes shred and tossed across the room under his Force.

Gasping, Aemond silenced your lips again under a deep passion. A sheer underwear tucked your maidenhood. Frustrated, Aemond snatched and ripped in one swoop, his cock engorged twice, hardened, his throat dried and croaked at the sight of your flawless beauty, picturing the lines of stretch marks on your lower belly from the swollen pregnancy. Aemond thought beforehand that if the First Order has been under siege, in one way to promote a difficult position that couldn’t diffuse, he needed an heir, an heir of a stronger, faster and more calculating version of himself.

“Hold on, scavenger, I’m sure this will be painful for you, but you’ll grow to love the feeling of my cock, grinding inside your walls. How do you feel now, little woman? Are you willing to give an heir for me?”

You gasped. There was so much life ahead of you. Unsure of his words, you were sure he’s crazy to know that one, obtaining pregnancy is scandalous—especially if a father is a notorious leader. He could be killed, and could be tortured or his enemies will use you and the child to proceed their victory to reach Aemond.

Gulping and vibrating under him, you uttered. “Why me?”

Your heart is torn in half. What if Aemond is only using you as a spare time hobby? What if he’ll soon find a lover who’s more beautiful and mature and not childlike like you, and for you to be thrown in the dark and be forgotten? Numerous possibilities rushing in your mind—and halted—when Aemond said, “I won’t betray you. Betraying is the enemy’s job.”

“But you’re the enemy,” you remarked.

“In this room, you’ll only see the real me, as the real Aemond, a beast hidden in a skin of a man,” he murmured. “I must have you,” he grunted, pushing his cock into your constricted folds, pumping and sliding in a tremendous pace that the bed rocked.

Moans ascended in the roofs, Aemond’s quiet grunts entered through your ears. Your legs wrapped around his slender waist, bobbing as his powerful thrusts electrified your drenched walls.

Your eyes lulled, but Aemond grasped your face and aligned it to his, violet eye narrowed. “Look at me as I fuck you good—heavy and fast. Your belly will soon swell with a future Jedi, a more powerful warrior than any good-for-nothing troops in the galaxy.”

His legs ached as his one hand untied the knot on your wrist and hauled your body up for you to snuggle him, bed rocking continuously as your voice rasped, airily sighing with your eyes closed, almost seeing pink stars swirling in your closed lids, your mouth sucked Aemond’s neck, offered a low hiss through his teeth.

“That’s it, my good angel,” Aemond purred,the flat of his large hands enveloped and motioned against your naked back. The heat in the room faded, the coldness bumped into your bare flesh; the air condition is activated, encouraged your warm bodies to go at full speed.

“Aemond,” you moaned, head threw back.

Aemond’s pace became sloppy, staggered at you calling his name. “Say it again, my darling scavenger. Say my name.”

“Aemond…Aemond,” your hips gyrated, in pleasurable heat.

His lips curved. “I knew you would love it eventually.”

“Need you to come…inside me..in me…on me…in my mouth or face. Fuck me good,” you begged, corner of your lips salivating, tongue buds prickling, in hopes to taste his cock again.

But you missed the part where Aemond’s eye gleamed in darkened shade, in secret thrill.

Grabbing your hips, nails deepened and bruised your flesh and bones as his thrusts shoved harder, sending your voice wailing through the roof. You were sure that the Stormtroopers would stop and listen over your voice. Aemond couldn’t care less; he loved seeing you like this.

“Almost there, my scavenger,” he groaned, kissing your cheek, last few rounds set in; your arms slightly flailed yet gripped around his neck, face nuzzled onto his lean neck as he blasted hot white liquid inside you.

Kissing on several spots on your face, Aemond tugged your body down with him, with your side profile pressed against his chest, his hand rested on your back head while the other brushed your back.

“The child will soon grow into you,” he reminded.

“What about the droid?” you asked, puzzled.

Aemond scoffed. “Forget about that damn droid. It is you who I am enamored to, who I am now devoted to.”

“Is this the power of force?”

“No, this is my love yearning for someone—for you, my sweet,” he said. “The force is neither the army nor the galaxy. The force is within us, and only us can gather. The force can sometimes break us.”

“You didn’t break me,” you noted, admiring his sapphire eye.

Aemond smiled. “No, but you tamed the force within me.”

And you both shared a tender kiss under dimmed light.

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refusecollectionpoint · 2 years

Note

The way you draw Kylo you get it. The thiccness the roundness

Thanks. Kylo is a loaf of force!bread. The way you describe him you get it. Cheers.

#my trash ship #asking rcp #kylo #bottom!kylo #bottom kylo #bottom!kylo ren #bottom kylo ren #kylo ren #Kylo is a loaf of force!bread

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bwemph · 4 years

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Darkness Rising / Volume I: The Force Awakens / Chapter I

Pairing: Kylo Ren x Reader

Summary: Your mundane, tasteless life takes a turn for the more exciting when a droid and a Resistance fighter bring the fight with the First Order to your middle-of-nowhere planet, Jakku. Little do you know, you are about to get wrapped up in saving the universe.

Word Count: 3,377

Warnings: N/A

A/N: This is kind of a “pilot” episode, so to speak. I’m planning on rewriting the entire sequel trilogy and fixing a lot of the creative choices that I personally didn’t like, so things will MAJORLY divert from the original plot when we reach the ROS landmark. Should I keep going?

Luke Skywalker has vanished. In his absence, the sinister First Order has risen from the ashes of the Empire and will not rest until Skywalker, the last Jedi, has been destroyed. With the support of the Republic, General Leia Organa leads a brave Resistance. She is desperate to find her brother Luke and gain his help in restoring peace and justice to the galaxy.

***

Blood trickling down the side of the pilot’s head matted his black curls in the sticky red substance.

Poe Dameron, best and most daring pilot of the Resistance, was now unconscious and beaten nigh senseless in his holding cell.

Kylo Ren watched him with cold eyes, prodding him with the Force every so often to coax the hostage to life again.

Poe had resisted each interrogator with impressive resolve, and finally Kylo decided if he wanted to get anything done in a timely manner, he would have to do it himself lest he face the wrath of Supreme Leader Snoke.

Besides, he wanted to give Skywalker what he deserved. It was time for Kylo to face Skywalker himself, as Snoke promised.

After making one last lap of pacing around the cell, he turned and faced the wall with a sigh.

A sudden stir in the Force alerted Ren of the pilot now waking. He turned silently. “I had no idea we had the best pilot in the Resistance on board.” He looked the pilot up and down. “Comfortable?”

“Not really,” Poe rasped, that infuriating wit intact despite his bruises.

“I’m impressed.” Kylo stalked forward, watching the way the dim light reflected off the silver on his mask and into the pilot’s eyes. Poe winced before Kylo went on, “No one has been able to get out of you what you did with the map.”

“You might want to rethink your technique.”

A twinge of vexation pulsed through Kylo’s veins. He raised his hand toward Poe and took a moment to revel in the way the pilot fought against the Force.

A grunt escaped Poe’s lips as he writhed in silent agony.

“Where is it?” Kylo said, jabbing at some of the the pilot’s more recent memories. He thrust Poe back against the headboard.

“The Resistance,” Poe’s breath caught in his throat, “will not be intimidated by you.”

“Where...is it?”

Poe let out a harrowing scream, sweat beading on his forehead and veins protruding from his neck. He fought against his bonds, and Kylo could feel the hundreds of pleas and cries that Poe fought back with a last effort to retain where the map was hidden.

Finally, he cracked.

Kylo released him, watching as he slumped forward while labored breaths wracked his body.

“A droid…” Kylo mused. “Clever.” He leant in close to the pilot one last time. “Thank you for your compliance.”

With that, Kylo strode from the room.

The door hissed open to reveal a man waiting for him. A pale, scraggly General with slicked back ginger hair and an unpleasant expression that crumpled his lips as he caught sight of Kylo.

“It’s in a droid. A BB unit,” Kylo said.

“Well then,” General Hux replied, “if it’s on Jakku, we’ll soon have it.”

“I leave that to you.”

***

Unscrewing the panel in the rudder, you took a moment to look around inside.

The lightbulb on the side of your goggles was dim and starting to fade. Hopefully you could find someone to trade portions with for a new bulb soon.

You reached inside and poked around, pulling pieces of machinery apart until you found enough satisfying parts. This thing had to be ancient. Hardly anything of worth to be found amidst the dusty wires and pieces that used to move.

You tucked the dismembered machinery into your bag and grabbed hold of the rope to your left before sliding down, down, down, to the rusted floor of the once glorious Star Destroyer.

The pieces of scrap and metal rubbed against each other with unpleasant clanging and scratching as your feet hit the ground. You removed your goggles and ragged mask as you emerged into the hot sun.

Amidst the metal was your last bottle of water. In order to ease your sandpaper tongue you poured the last few drops down your throat, but they were nowhere near enough.

Now you started your journey back across the desert on your speeder. It coughed up two puffs of black smoke before humming to life and carrying you over the sands of Jakku.

You were pleased to find the breeze drying your sweat and cooling your skin as you neared town. Small black dots appeared on the horizon, all hard at work. The heat made them dance around a little and you hoped your dehydration wasn’t playing tricks on your mind.

Finally, you reached town and hopped down from your speeder. You pulled a lever and slung your staff over your shoulder before dragging all the parts you had collected today across the sand to clean and polish them.

After vigorous scrubbing and polishing, you sat back and admired your work. All this had to be worth at least three portions. You gathered your things and waited in line at Unkar Plutt’s shack. When it was your turn you laid them all out for him to inspect.

“What you’ve brought me today is worth...hmm…” he inspected the items closely, “one quarter portion.”

Disappointment grabbed your heart and yanked it downwards, but you took your quarter portion with a glare.

That night you found yourself cooking for one, your only company the sizzling of the rehydrated meat you had been saving for a while. You stirred some powder into a rusted bowl, and it instantly rose until it was a small loaf of bread.

Now that the sun was setting, it was cool and the humidity had gone down. This led you to your decision to eat dinner outside that night.

You licked your plate clean and allowed yourself a moment to gaze at the horizon. You watched a small ship leaving the atmosphere. Someone far more fortunate than you must have the chance to get off this speck of sand. You pondered on a hundred different places they could be headed to. Were they as golden yellow, deserted, and dry as this place? Or was it somewhere swampy and wet?

A high pitched, mechanical squeal caught your attention. It wasn’t a sound you were unfamiliar with, but it wasn’t common near your home.

A distressed droid.

You jumped to your feet and caught sight of the brutish Teedo indeed struggling with a droid.

You called out to the aggressor in the native Jakku language, “Tal’ama parqual!”

Your accent wasn’t exactly accurate, but it was enough to get across that you were demanding Teedo set the droid free.

Teedo and the droid went silent and looked to you in surprise.

“Parqual zatana!” you shouted.

Teedo spat a handful of threats back and refused to free the droid, continuing to struggle with it.

You rushed forward and pulled a knife from your belt, cutting the droid loose from the netting it was all caught up in.

Teedo lost his temper and frantically spat more angry words at you, demanding you stop immediately. He found that droid, and it was his to sell.

“Noma,” you replied when the droid was free, pointing a finger in Teedo’s face.

Teedo shook his head, exasperated, and gave his clunky steed a kick. You watched as it lumbered away.

The droid beeped and buzzed a long thread of provocative insults and names after him. You hushed it. “That’s just Teedo. He wants you for parts.” You snarled. “He has no respect for anyone.”

The droid hummed in response.

You crouched to eye level with the droid. “Your antenna’s bent,” you said, reaching out to pluck it from the droid’s head and carefully reshape the small wire. While you fiddled with it, you took a moment to fully consider the droid, noting its unique orange and white coloring, round body, and dome shaped head that remained on its top regardless of how it rolled or maneuvered.

“Where do you come from?” you asked.

It gave a handful of tones equating to “That’s classified information”.

“Classified. Really?” you said, your voice reflecting that of humoring a small child. “Me too. Big secret.”

You clicked the antenna back into place on its head and pointed to the west. “Niima outpost is that way. Stay off of Kelvin Ridge,” you said as you gathered your staff stood. “Keep away from the Sinking Fields in the north or you’ll drown in the sand.” With no further instruction you turned and began heading back to your home.

The droid beeped a question.

You turned sharply. “Don’t follow me. Town is that way.” You pointed again toward Niima Outpost.

It tweeted a protest.

“No!”

This time it gave a sad tone and drooped a little, cautiously rolling toward you. The droid was alone, lost and afraid. You were the first being on this planet to show it a little kindness.

Your heart broke a little for it. After a long, long moment of consideration and a further hesitation to follow it up, you made a small head gesture for it to follow you.

“Beeeeep!” The droid excitedly rolled after you to catch up. It chattered a string of thank yous as you started back toward home.

“In the morning, you go,” you said.

Another thank you from the droid, as if it had ignored the statement.

“You’re welcome.” You couldn’t help smile a little at the droid’s enthusiasm.

***

The droid, who introduced itself as BB8, ended up keeping you company all day. It was hard to say no to it, and the it was actually quite useful when it came to scavenging. It would scan the room and alert you of any pieces of machinery that might be worth something.

The two of you rode into town and you began unloading the parts you had scavenged that day. BB8 told you the whole way how worried it was about whether its master would come back.

“Don’t give up. He might still show up, whoever it is you’re waiting for,” you assured. “Classified. I know. And I know all about waiting.”

BB8 asked who you’re waiting for.

“For my family.” You squinted against the sun, looking to the sky as if you were waiting for their ship to return any moment now. “They’ll be back. One day.” You nodded and looked at the droid, forcing a smile. “Come on.”

You got in line outside of Unkar Plutt’s shack, making sure to keep BB8 close and keeping a close watch on those who eyed it almost hungrily. You laid out your parts on the counter and watched Plutt inspect them.

“These five pieces are worth...Let me see here...” he made a gurgling sound deep in his throat, something of a hum, “One half portion.”

Dismay grabbed your throat and you furrowed your eyebrows. “Last week they were a half portion each!”

Plutt didn’t listen to you, but he leaned over the counter and inspected BB8 with interest. “What about the droid?”

You looked to BB8, who had an air of confusion as it stared back.

“What about him?”

“I’ll pay for him.” He disappeared from view of the window for a moment before dropping a large pile of portions right before your eyes. “Sixy portions.”

You rushed forward, your stomach rumbling at the many nights worth of dinner--and snacks and breakfasts and second breakfasts and lunches--right in front of you. You started scooping them up, but took another look at BB8, who looked silently up at you, shaking.

Your eyes fluttered as if you were snapping out of a trance, and you breathed out a sigh of resolve. “Actually...the droid’s not for sale.” You took your one half portion and looked to BB8. “Come on,” you said to him before you both promptly left.

You strode through town back toward your speeder.

BB8 gave a string of tones and bleeps. Why did you do that?

You sighed and looked at the plastic package in your hand, eyeing the food that would leave you with a half filled stomach tonight. “Because it was the right thing to do.”

He thanked you and rolled along, beeping and buzzing with glee. BB8 told you again and again how happy he was to have a new friend, and how grateful his master would be that you saved him. You smiled, listening to the droid’s happy chatter, but then the droid appeared a little sad the longer it talked about its master.

You knelt to face him. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of you until he comes back. You’re safe here. Nothing much goes on here anyway.”

“You there!” a guttural voice cried.

You stood and saw two thugs approaching you.

“We are taking that there droid,” the same voice said as the goon pointed at BB8.

Before you had time to react, the other threw a sack over BB8, who squealed in response.

“Oi!” you cried, kicking him in the stomach. “Get away!”

The thug with the sack crashed into a stack of metal urns, while the other grabbed you around the waist and pinned your arms to your sides.

You kicked the air and cried out, landing on your feet and sinking your teeth into your aggressor’s grimy arm wrapped in musty black rags.

You thrust your elbow back into his stomach while he was distracted. The man tumbled backward. The other recovered.

You picked up your staff and began trying to fight off the second goon, kicking him away again when the first grabbed your staff and trapped you between it and himself.

Spinning, you nailed his jaw twice with your weapon and he stumbled away, passing out in the sand.

You took a moment to catch your breath and knelt to free BB8 from the sack.

He beeped, frightened, then let out another shrill alert sound.

You followed his gaze to a man in a brown and red leather jacket.

That’s my master’s jacket! It’s just like it! That man took my master’s jacket!

“Him?” you asked, waiting for confirmation before rushing toward the thief.

The man made a dash in the opposite direction with you hot on his tail.

You took a sharp left turn and cut around in front of him, swiping at him with your staff before he could process you standing in front of him.

He tumbled to the ground with a grunt.

“What’s your hurry, thief?” you accused, keeping him pinned to the ground with your staff.

He took a moment to catch his wind. He was still dazed when he said, “What? Thief?”

BB8 rolled up fast and a small arm extended from a compartment in his side. He proceeded to zap the man with some kind of electric spark.

“Ow!” he cried, still confused. “Hey! What?”

“The jacket,” you said. “This droid says you stole it!”

“Look, I’ve had a pretty messed up day, alright? So I’d appreciate if you stopped accusing me of--ow!”

BB8 had zapped him again.

“Stop it!” he snapped at the droid.

“Where’d you get it?” you pressed. “It belongs to his master.”

The man looked between you and the very agitated BB8, then let out a long sigh. He took a beat to piece together some words.

“It belonged to Poe Dameron. That was his name, right?”

BB8 looked to you, confirming, arm still extended.

“He was captured by the First Order. I helped him escape, but our ship crashed.” He paused while you and BB8 waited expectantly for his conclusion. “Poe didn’t make it.” His words hung heavily in the air.

BB8 drooped and made a low, sad beep.

“I tried to help him. I’m sorry.”

BB8 retracted his zappy arm and rolled off to mourn. You watched after him to make sure nobody else tried to snatch him up.

You turned your attention to the man again. “So you’re with the Resistance?”

He paused. “Obviously. Yes. I am.” He pushed himself to his feet. “I’m with the Resistance, yeah.” He leaned in and whispered, “I’m with the Resistance.”

A little starstruck, you lowered your staff and gave a smile. “I’ve never met a Resistance fighter before.”

“Well, this is what we look like. Some of us. Others look different.”

Excitement welled in you as it now appeared you were going to be face with the opportunity to become an ally and aid the Resistance. “BB8 says he’s on a secret mission. He has to get back to your base.”

“Apparently he has a map that leads to Luke Skywalker and everyone’s after it.”

Further exhilaration coursed through your veins at the prospect of this mission. “Luke Skywalker?” you breathed. “I thought he was a myth.”

BB8 began beeping wildly, and both you and your new ally turned to face him. You followed after the droid and peeked around a corner, seeing something that dampened your excitement a generous amount: stormtroopers. They spoke to Plutt’s thugs, who were still favoring their bruises and pointing in your direction.

Suddenly, your hand was in the Resistance fighter’s and he was pulling you in the opposite direction, right as blaster fire started firing in your direction.

“What are you doing?” you cried.

“Come on!”

You ducked as a red blur passed over both your heads and brought down a merchant’s booth.

“Let go of me!”

“No, we gotta move!”

You ripped your hand free and continued sprinting alongside him. “I know how to run without you holding my hand! BB8 stay close! This way!”

You all turned a corner and again ducked under more laser fire.

As you took a breather under the shade of a tent, you gripped one of the poles to keep balance. “They’re shooting at both of us.”

“Yeah, they saw you with me. You’re marked.”

“Well thanks for that.”

“I’m not the one who chased you down with a stick!”

You heard some things clatter and fall into the sand, then your ally cried, “Does anyone have blasters around here?!”

You knelt to check in on BB8. “Are you okay?”

He beeped frantically before the Resistance fighter quieted you both.

A whirring sound echoed from the sky, and the fighter took your hand again.

“Stop taking my hand!” you said.

The three of you burst from the tent. You glanced over your shoulder to see a TIE fighter screaming down from the sky, and a second one opening fire on you.

The lasers missed you, but they collided with the tent you had previously hidden in, which exploded and threw you, the fighter, and BB8 several feet in the air before you skidded a little farther in the sand.

The dust settled around you and you saw the townspeople panicking and scrambling in all directions, screaming and calling out to each other.

You looked up to see the two TIE fighters reeling back for a second go. Your heart sped up, and you looked around for your ally. He lay motionless in the sand.

You scrambled over to him and shook him awake.

In an instant he was upright and checked you over for injury. “Are you okay?”

The question stunned you. Nobody had ever asked you that before.

“Yeah,” you breathed. “Follow me.”

Dodging lasers and explosions and debris, you made a dash for a ship in the spaceport, now only several hundred feet in front of you.

“We can’t outrun them!” the Resistance fighter cried.

“We might in that quad-jumper!” You pointed at the shiny red and white ship in front of you.

“We need a pilot!”

You gestured to yourself. “We’ve got one!”

“You?” The fighter disregarded the issue, then pointed at a much closer, disk-shaped ship. “What about that ship?”

“That one’s garbage!” you said, considering how it hadn’t flown in years.

Right as you reached the quad-jumper, laser fire ignited the ship and it went up in a great mushroom cloud.

You skidded to a stop. “The garbage will do!”

With that, the pair of you sprinted toward the piece of junk in hopes that it would carry you safely out of the atmosphere.

#kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #ben solo #ben solo x reader #star wars #the force awakens #the last jedi #rise of skywalker #bb8 #poe dameron #poe dameron x reader

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secretlygrantaire · 6 years

Text

Everybody’s Replaceable. Kylo Ren X Female Reader Soulmate AU. Chapter Six.

Synopsis: The reader was taken away from her family as a child to work on a First Order base as a weapons tester with other children. After managing to escape the First Order when she is older the reader lives by herself and begin to feel her connection and sensitivity to the force. It is discovered that she has similar abilities to Kylo Ren who is ordered to take her in as an apprentice and show her the ways of the force. I’m not going to give anything else away I’ll just say that they are soulmates but don’t know it yet, chaos ensues.

Warnings: THE LAST JEDI SPOILERS SORT OF!!! Angst, the reader gets injured, fluff.

All research for fact-checking is done on Wookieepedia.com or Starwars.wikia.com

Previous Chapters:

One: http://secretlygrantaire.tumblr.com/post/169673830791/everybody-is-replaceable-kylo-ren-x-female-reader

Two: http://secretlygrantaire.tumblr.com/post/169719813901/everybody-is-replaceable-kylo-ren-x-female-reader

Three: http://secretlygrantaire.tumblr.com/post/169749517901/everybody-is-replaceable-kylo-ren-x-female-reader

Four: http://secretlygrantaire.tumblr.com/post/169755457691/everybody-is-replaceable-kylo-ren-x-female-reader

Five: http://secretlygrantaire.tumblr.com/post/169794929001/everybody-is-replaceable-kylo-ren-x-female-reader

Y/N= Your name

Y/F/N= Your Full name

Y/H/C= Your hair color

Y/E/C= Your eye color

The reader goes by her middle name once she becomes Ren’s apprentice, in this story, her name will be Alia, pronounces Ah-Lee-Uh

Chapter Six: Dream Bonding

A soulmate can be described as two or more individuals whose souls, (the very essence of who they are) were crafted in the beginning of everything from the same stardust. Nobody quite knows for sure how or why soulmates came to be but what is known is soulmates share an unbreakable bond stronger than, hatred, violence or even death. When an individual turns 18 the name of their soulmate appears on their wrist, however very few individuals are fortunate enough to find their soulmate within their lifetime, sometimes language barriers block the two from meeting, sometimes two people will be separated, living lightyears apart from each other and sometimes a person’s soulmate will be taken by the cruel hand of death before they could even meet, when a person’s soulmate dies the name on their wrist will vanish. Despite the circumstances, the bond between two soulmates cannot be broken, some have tried to erase the name from their wrist even going as far as to cut off their own hand only to see the name appear on their other wrist. Some have gone mad searching for their soulmates, terrified of the concept of dying alone, and yet no one is ever really alone, even if you never meet your soulmate in person, the soul has its ways of connecting soulmates, through dreams. Dream bonding is the act of two or more souls connecting mentally, and subconsciously while a person is asleep. When apart from one another the soul will allow for a person’s mind to connect to their soulmate’s mind, if their soulmate is awake the person watches over them like a wandering spirit but if they are asleep, the two may dream together in harmony, reunited in the world of dreams. The act of dream bonding is exceedingly rare and occurs only when two souls truly yearn for one another. When soulmates are united they can sense each other’s emotions, their movements, their breathing patterns and can feel their heartbeats when touching soulmate’s hearts will occasionally beat in sync, for the two souls also share the same heart beating only for each other. The concept of a soulmate can be controversial as some people have no soulmate, their unique soul finds peace and comfort in the world around them and with the people they love. Yet the bonding of souls cannot be denied, for love shall overcome all.

Y/N stood in the shower, her eyes closed, letting the hot water soothe her strained muscles. She didn’t know what she expected to happen during today’s training but this certainly wasn’t it. She wondered if every day would be like this if Kylo would always be as harsh and cold to her as he was today. She remembered the look of disgust in his eyes, “He doesn’t care that I’m his soulmate.” She thought to herself. “Of course he doesn’t! He’s made it perfectly clear that he doesn’t want a soulmate, and why would he? It’s all a big waste of time.” Y/N leaned against the cold stone wall of the shower and slid to the floor, looking down at her wrist she wished she could erase his name and have this all end, grabbing a washcloth Y/N began to harshly scrub her wrist, hoping that when she looked again it would be as clean and empty as it was a few weeks ago. But to her dismay, his name remained bold black letter staining her now sore wrist. Y/N signed and leaned back resting her head again the wall and letting the water run down her face like rain. Moments passed in a painful silence before Y/N turned the water off and left the shower, wrapping herself in a black towel she stared at her tired face in the mirror, she was a beautiful girl with brilliant Y/E/C eyes and soft lips. She dried her hair in the towel before pinning it back into a braided bun, she then proceeded to slip on a clean uniform, the soft fabric feeling nice on her cold body. She sat on her bed and stared at the floor in front of her, Kylo had told her he would show her around the ship this evening, but she didn’t know when “this evening” was. Y/N signed and stood, strolling around her chambers, she stopped at her desk and pulled open one of the drawers, five books were stack in alphabetical order, she pulled the top book off of the pile and read the cover. “A detailed history of The Republic 1032 BBY to 32 BBY.” Though it sounded incredibly dull Y/N had nothing better to do, so she sat on her bed and flipped open the novel.”After the end of the Sith War, a new Republic was formed through the Unification of Intergalactic Systems...” Y/N could feel her eyelids growing heavy before she was jolted awake by a loud knock on her door. Expecting there to be another stormtrooper outside her door Y/N was surprised to find none other than Kylo Ren standing before her. “Master Ren.” Y/N said, “Come with me, Alia.” His voice distorted behind his mask. “I am going to show you around the ship, so as to ensure you won’t get lost again.” Y/N nodded, closing the door behind her she proceeded down the hall with Kylo. Y/N followed the man down the twists and turns of the maze that was the Dreadnought, trying to mentally keep track of every room he named, wishing she could write everything down or create a map or something! Kylo stopped next to a large room, filled with tables and benches, “This is the canteen you may eat your meals here but you are not required to, the kitchen where you will get your meals is across the hall.” Suddenly remembering that she had I fact not eaten all day Y/N stomach rumbled loudly, Y/N could feel the blood rush to her face. “Are you hungry?” Kylo asked. “Oh, no sir, I’m fine.” Y/N said quickly only to be interrupted by her stomach rumbling once more. “The kitchen is closed now... but follow me.” Y/N followed Kylo down a hallway until they reached a grey metal door, Kylo swiped his pass key and motioned for Y/N to follow him. “This is the break room for officers.” He said as he took off his helmet. “Doesn’t it ever get hot in that thing?” Y/N asked before she could stop herself and to her surprise, Kylo chuckled. “You get used to it.” He replied as he placed the helmet on the table, “Sit, I’ll get us something to eat.” Y/N nodded and pulled out a metal chair, surprised by how nice Kylo was acting towards her. Kylo walked to the conservator and opened it there wasn’t much but it was better than nothing. Kylo returned to their table carrying two small apples and half a loaf of bread. He sat opposite Y/N and handed her an apple before tearing off a piece of the bread and handing it to her as well. “Thank you.” Y/N said graciously taking the food, the two ate in a comfortable silence before Kylo said: “So we will start training on a regular basis, every morning at 8:00 AM.” Y/N nodded “Yes sir.” “You have the Force within you Alia, you just need to learn how to control it, how to center your abilities without the need for anger or fear or sadness.” Y/N looked up meeting his deep, sad eyes. “I don’t know how.” She whispered. Kylo took her hand, “I will show you how.” Y/N could feel her pupils dilate as she stared at the man before her and she could swear they were leaning forward when suddenly the break room’s door opened. Kylo dropped Y/N hand as a head of orange hair entered the room. General Hux stood before the table, a smirk on his face, “ Am I... interrupting something?” He asked. Kylo stood and grabbed his helmet, “No I was just leaving.” He placed the helmet on his head with a click and turned towards Y/N, “Tomorrow 8:00 AM, don’t be late.” And with that he left. Y/N stood to leave before being stopped by an arm, “Oh no don’t leave yet Alia, there is something I’ve been meaning to tell you.” Y/N turned around slowly to face the General. “Sir?” She asked. Hux took a step towards her, “Take my advise, when it comes to Ren everybody is replaceable, he has no care for anybody but himself, the sooner you learn that the better off you will be.” Y/N furrowed her brows, once again hearing that phrase, “Everybody’s replaceable.” Hux titled his head, “Has he not told you? The only reason you are here is because our Supreme Leader ordered for him to find you and make you his apprentice, he didn’t choose you.” Hux let out a laugh. “You’re nothing more to him than a beetle under his boot.” He sneered, “And while he may be training you, when the time comes that you grow too powerful, he’ll just snuff you out.” Y/N gritted her teeth, as Hux grabbed her arm and whispered in her ear, “I like you Alia, it would be a pity for you to be destroyed.” He released her arm and took a step back. “Ren’s loyalties don’t lie with you, remember that.” Y/N watched as the man left. She clenched her fists, “You’re wrong.” She whispered, but the phrase “Everybody’s replaceable” echoed in her mind. What if Hux was right? Was Y/N really nothing to him? Y/N left the break room and headed back to her chambers, feeling the tears burn in her eyes she waited until she was behind closed doors to let them escape. “He’s wrong.” She wept into her hands and she slid to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest she let out sob.She knew she shouldn’t let Hux’s words affect her so much but yet, they did. Wiping the tears from her eyes Y/N changed into her nightwear and slid into bed, too exhausted to do anything but sleep.

Kylo’s POV:

Kylo entered his chambers and pulled off his helmet, throwing it to the floor. He didn’t know what had gotten into him thinking back to the break room, staring into Y/N’s beautiful eyes, he suddenly remembered he had left her alone.. with Hux. Gritting his teeth he knew it was too late to go back, he decided a shower was best to clear his head. He let the hot water run down his back, not wanting to leave the warm oasis. He stared at the tattoo on his wrist, his eyes tracing each letter of her name, the more he tried to dismiss the idea of a soulmate the more he wanted to let her know. Begrudgingly he turned off the water and wrapped his body in a towel, he dried off and slipped into his nightwear before brushing his teeth and combing back his unruly black hair, he slipped into bed and stared at the ceiling before drifting off to sleep. When Kylo opened his eyes he was in a dark room, there was nothing around him for miles, he was alone. But he did not feel alone, Kylo could feel his heart pounding in his chest at a steady rate, suddenly he knew she was there. “Alia?” He called, turning around in the dark. “Alia?” Closing his eyes he heard in the distance barely a whisper, “...Kylo.” He spun around “Alia?” He called once more walking towards the voice. “Kylo.” She whispered. As Kylo continued to walk the room became lighter and lighter until he saw in the distance, her figure. As the two approached he could hear their hearts beating as one, the couple sat down facing each other neither of them said a word Alia simply held up her hands, Kylo reached forwards and pressed his palms to hers, intertwining their fingers. And slowly they leaned forward before pressing their foreheads together, a warmth overcoming them. Kylo could feel her breathing, he could hear her heart beat along with his, a smile graced his lips as the two sat in pure bliss. This was something he had never experienced before, they had dream bonded.

END OF CHAPTER SIX! Wow this one was really cute, ALSO I did some research and found out that in the Star Wars universe they use the same time system as we do on Earth, (convenient) and the equivalent to a refrigerator is something called a conservator, like, that’s so extra just call it a fridge damn. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this, especially my concept of dream bonding, this is just something I came up with and really REALLY enjoy writing about. Let me know if you want more or if you want to be a part of a tag list! Thank you so much!!

#star wars #Star Wars fanfiction #Star Wars imagine #kylo ren imagine #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren #ben solo x reader #ben solo imagine #ben solo #tlj spoilers #dream bonding

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whimsicalworldofme · 6 years

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Mothers, Fathers, and Forgotten Children - Part 2

Ava finds herself drawn to a course of action that she hadn’t previously considered.

Word Count: 1214

Content Warnings: None

“Ben Solo has a son…” Rey struggled to wrap her mind around the knowledge while Ava kept on with her work, shifting over to the other side of her since she’d finished cleaning off the other portion of counter she’d been working on. “But he thinks he’s alone.”

“He doesn’t know,” Ava stated. “And for the sake of my son’s safety, it needs to stay that way, all right?” She raised a brow, pausing with a hand on her hip, trying to look intimidating rather than pleading. “I heard you can see each other, speak to each other. Can he see what’s around you?”

“No,” Rey shook her head. “He can only see me. I won’t let him know,” she promised.

“Thank you,” Ava went back to scrubbing. Looking over she could see that Rey had many more questions, the way that she avoided Ava’s gaze but kept giving her furtive glances spoke to that fact. They worked in silence for a few minutes. “Did you grow up on Jakku? Your whole life?”

Rey nodded.

“You and your parents were scavengers?”

“I was. I don’t remember my parents,” Rey said quietly. “They left me on Jakku when I was four.”

“Sorry,” Ava frowned. “I didn’t know.” She saw the casual shrug that her companion gave but it clearly masked her struggle for understanding. “My parents kind of left me too. They were entirely consumed with fighting the Empire. They just couldn’t stop. When I was born they passed me off to my aunt. They died when I was eight. And then my aunt died after I went to study with Master Luke. It’s tough, wondering why they didn’t care enough to stick around.”

Rey said nothing, but her expression softened a little, understanding that Ava was trying to make amends for the unintentional pain she might have caused in mentioning parents.

“There are a lot of orphans running this Resistance,” Ava sighed. Rey finished her patch of counter and moved to the other side of her to start on another. “We made our own family from the others who were left behind by their parents. If you stick around, you’ll be so surrounded by family that you’ll be sick of us before long,” she grinned and Rey laughed, her nose and eyes scrunching up. She was cute, like a ray of sunshine come to life. Since she’d had to grow up so quickly, Ava felt a very motherly affection towards Rey, wanting to protect her. She wasn’t that much older than Luke.

“I haven’t decided what to do yet,” the Rey confessed. “I don’t know how I’m meant to help but I feel like that’s what I’m meant to do.”

“Everyone goes through that when they first find themselves in the Resistance,” Ava put some real elbow grease into clearing one particularly sludgy spot on the counter before getting fed up with it and chucking her scrubber in the sink. “You want something to eat?”

“I have rations in my room,” Rey was a bit taken aback. “I don’t want to take your food.”

“Well it’s the base’s food, so it’s yours as much as mine,” Ava smiled and went to the pantry pulling out all the necessaries to make something fresh to eat. She’d managed to get her hands on a loaf of crusty bread and some eggs in the space port a few days prior. It didn’t take long to fry them up some toad-in-a-holes. She put a plate in front of Rey with a bit of flourish.

“Eat,” she insisted, wondering if Rey had ever had a real, decent home cooked meal in her life. Not that this was the most remarkable thing she’d ever made. But it beat rations. She tucked into her own food, watching as Rey devoured and savored at the same time.

“This is good,” Rey pointed at the runny bit of the egg yolk running onto the bread. “What is this?”

“Eggs,” Ava said trying to hide her surprise that at nineteen the girl had never had eggs before. But it kind of made sense. She doubted Jakku had much in the way of living creatures that laid eggs fit for consumption. “Some kind of bird eggs. I don’t know what bird. Native to whatever that planet was we stopped at after Crait.”

“I’ve never had anything like it,” Rey took another bite, her eyes rolling shut in delight.

“I used to cook every day, every meal, at the old base,” Ava hadn’t realized how much she missed their old home until saying it. “Hopefully we can stay here long enough for things to get back to normal.” She sighed, wondering if there would ever be normalcy in any of the galaxy. “I need the routine to keep me sane.”

“You only cook?” Rey asked. “You don’t go on missions or do anything as a Jedi?”

Ava knew that tone, the confusion and disbelief that someone would squander the gift of being connected to the Force by staying holed away in a kitchen all day, every day. She got it from everyone who learned of her abilities.

“I haven’t wanted to be a Jedi since I was seventeen,” she brushed the crumbs off her fingertips. “I teach my son how to control his abilities because I have to. He’s strong and being a little kid with that power is terrifying and confusing. If he chooses to follow in the footsteps of Luke Skywalker that’s his choice. If he chooses to be a pilot like his Pop, that’s his choice. All I want is for him to control his connection, not have it control him. As for myself, I wouldn’t miss my connection to the Force if it vanished tomorrow.”

“Can you teach me?” Rey asked, leaning forward with her elbows propped on the counter. “I still don’t know entirely how this works and I only had a few days with Master Skywalker. I could use help with meditating.”

Ava didn’t know how to respond right away. She hadn’t ever considered herself an expert. Luke was her responsibility, so she taught him. No one else there could. But to teach another person? With her limited knowledge? There were plenty of ways it could go wrong. But meditation, patience, and control were all things that she knew she had managed to master more than most. Being a mother at seventeen had forced her into it. And if Rey was going to be their only hope in defeating Kylo Ren, Ava felt she had a responsibility to help when asked.

“I’ll have to ask my son if he’s ok having you join us in his lessons,” she said slowly. “I’m not a Jedi master, you know.”

“You have six years of training under Luke Skywalker,” Rey interjected with eager emphasis. “I can’t think of anyone better to teach me.”

“All right, flatterer,” Ava tried to laugh off her nerves. “Come by my quarters at seventeen hundred hours. Number 5B.”

“Thank you, Ava,” Rey popped up and gave her a hug, which completely threw Ava for a loop. She returned the affection before watching Rey bound off with elation in her steps.

“Oh Ava, what have you done,” she chided herself, shaking her head before going back to her chore of scrubbing.

Last Chapter Master List Next Chapter

#fanfiction #fanfic #fic #Star Wars #Star Wars au #Star Wars fanfiction #Star Wars fanfic #Star Wars fic #oc #Rey #Poe Dameron #story #multi chapter #multi chapter fanfiction #multi chapter fanfic #multi chapter fic

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ficbot · 4 years

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"I'm Poe. Ben yearned for the support craft arrive," Finn says, placing one hand to push past the braces, making her wisps of hair out of me all day."" Isn't stop his own. "When was the closest description he could have identified us is primitive. A grin spreads across Poe's code. The myth. The difference in Hux, he preferred an intact hull to a goblin - like?" Rey stepped off the wall. He didn't endearing, Poe grinning at him, adjusting their position expecting the step back, hidden beneath his navel. He was careful to make up for like a teenager at his need for days. The man was wearing a tighter fitting shirt and tugging it back hard. Kylo lay on the short covering of hair on the edges of his given tasks as quickly as you'll get you to drag him from the start.'Just down here yet I'd noticed they were right about that earlier." I like you, cumming all over again. Poe is torn between yelling'sorry'over and pulling back instantly, coughing a spray of water sliding down to the nightmares; his bright eyes gleamed. He was looking for the knot forming in her rooms, and though they are sad?" Poe holds his head. "Of course not. Even Rey, a shot, but it seems that pretending to me, Finn brings a loaf of bread that he was going to take another bite. The droid complied, dropping his dead bird into her purse and a good thing to bring back the control room of Kylo Ren, not again. He didn't even attempting to at least one person she wanted him to turn to the force around her flushed forehead as she walked from where he was part of the fact that he's arm tightens slightly around his waist when he arrives. He escaped the First Order to find a space for me."" At least now, or why General Organa grinned back at the baby boy. His hand presses and explores as it

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rawinternets · 6 years

Text

Star Wars Episode 7: A rediscovery.

I said before that Episode 1 / the prequels were the main impetus for this whole exercise. That is true, in a way. But it is only true in that I needed to see the prequels and the originals so I could compare my feelings about them with my Ep7 and Ep8 feelings.

If Ep7 and Ep8 didn’t exist, I doubt I would have undertaken this exercise. See, as I mentioned in the opening post, I had a suspicion that the new episodes were all the things many have criticized them for: derivative, overly commercial, written by committee. The magic of the originals has been lost, and we are left with simulacra.

It’s important that I come clean with a fact: I hate JJ Abrams. I think he’s a hack. He is fantastic at opening stories and god-awful at closing them. My hatred for JJ and his trademark approach began with the TV show Lost, where JJ opened an incredible number of fascinating storylines in the first 2 seasons, only to ad-lib the next four seasons to a highly unsatisfying ending. He re-made Star Trek by essentially cribbing from all the best Star Trek movies in the past, and I enjoyed that movie - while watching it, but not much upon reflection. For example, Young Cap’n Kirk is driving his father’s sexy car through the cornfields of Iowa - until he drives it over a ravine as big as the Grand Canyon. in the middle of Iowan corn fields. It’s a beautiful spectacle until you stop to think for a half second... wait, what? But by that time you’ve moved on to the next spectacle.

Like eating a Big Mac, JJ Abrams tastes good in the moment and then you realize what you just ate is mostly soybean paste, flash-frozen low quality meat, spongy bread, rubber cheese, all buoyed by artificial aromas that trick your brain into thinking that this is delicious, but only in the moment.

In short, a Big Mac is not good food, and JJ Abrams movies are not good movies.

But I really wanted to give this movie another chance. I wanted to know - was Episode 7 the “one beer too many” on a big night out, the one that feels good in the moment, but you later regret? Turns you off the beer brand once and for all? Is Episode 7 the extra Halloween candy that you eat at 10:30pm that makes you nauseous, impels you to throw the whole bag out? Did I lose any love and hope for Star Wars because Episode 7 delivered too much of the same thing, a Disney-ified, Abrams-ified, unoriginal pastiche of a pastiche?

The answer is “yes” and “no,” but mostly “yes.” This movie starts off amazingly - classic Abrams - but quickly loses its way, and tries to find it again by running into the same grooves we’ve already worn well over the past 7 Star Wars releases (in this respect, Rogue One gets the pass and Ep7 gets hurt because of my order). And while I was still eager to see Episode 8 (review to come), I was far less optimistic for the franchise, as I could see the blueprint for the future, and it is the same as the past. JJ Abrams is set to direct Episode 9, if you didn’t already know.

But of course -- JJ Abrams filmmaking is perfectly attuned to this kind of review. Taking poll on my feelings in the moment is the best way to watch an Abrams movie. That way, I can’t think too deeply about the fact that we’ve seen this before - in copy or rhyme - in nearly every scene shot. So even though this movie grades out not great - I feel even less great about it the more I think about it.

Onto the scores.

Average score: 6.57 Standard deviation: 2.01

Scroll. 7. Wait, why is there a new empire and a new rebellion? Why doesn’t a new republic have the ability to amass more forces to defeat a fragmented group of Empire loyalists? Are we saying the Empire never fell? If so, what were we celebrating at the end of Ep6? (Movie moves too fast to have these thoughts in the moment... these come to you afterward).

Jakku. 8. A cool star destroyer shot, Very cool stormtrooper visuals. BB8 is pretty cool. "This will begin to make things right." Poe is cool. Great and tangible feeling on the raid. Super scary. But wait... how did the First Order not scan for the X-wing? And Poe didn’t try to hide it? Even an awning or some covering would be fine. But still... good tension in the scene. Flametrooper! But wait... Another secret piece of info goes with a droid in the desert... mmmmmmm OK... Really like humanizing the stormtrooper, with a dramatic bloody handprint on (we later know is Finn’s) stormtrooper head. PTSD. And then comes Kylo Ren’s badass ship (that looks a lot like Darth Vader’s....).

Kylo Ren. 9. Kylo freezing the blaster bolt is superdope. I can forgive his Darth Vader wannabe character mask. I'm fine with the subtle "you talk first? I talk first?" joke by Poe. Fine to make fun of the mask as well. FUCK Captain Phasma - I immediately have distaste for this character. Finn’s Stormtrooper regret @ the massacre is cool. I like that.

Finn’s break. 7. Finn taking his mask off - a really powerful first shot. Captain Phasma is worthless. Did you know that this character was created because someone made concept art of a chrome stormtrooper for fun, Kathleen Kennedy walked into someone’s office and saw it and said “that has to be in the movie, it looks so cool,” and then they decided it should be a woman soldier for marketing purposes? What I’m trying to say is, the storytelling process was not the purest here. Phasma is exhibit A.

Rey intro. 9. JJ at his best: Really cool atmospherics on Jakku. Amazing wide shots of the empty destroyer bay. Rey is hot. Amazing shots. Huge scale of the desert and the downed star destroyer. Speeder... fine. Tie fighter wing down. amazing speeder shot with another downed destroyer. Fine with the stupid bird. (But... we have another mysterious sorta-poor desert dwelling force-sensitive hero?)

Trading. 9. Pretty beautiful shots (although borrowing heavily from Ep4?). Fine with the trading. I like the weirdo aspect of this girl idolizing the rebels and meticulously counting days. making a cool bread loaf thing. Lives in an ATAT, that's awesome too. Wearing silly rebel hat.

BB8 meets Rey. 8. Sorta bad dialogue (and “classified droid” of course). Nice desert shots.

Torture of Poe. 8. The mind reading is intense. Hux is fine. (But haven’t we seen a main character get tortured by Darth / Kylo before?)

Trading Part 2. 8. Why doesn’t Rey take the money for the droid? She’s so pure and perfect? Serendipity?

Finn Rescues Poe. 7. Wait... why? I guess Finn heard a good pilot is on board and he wants out. I don't love Finn’s heavy breathing. (Have you seen this? In bad action movies or even good ones, the actors are constantly hyperventilating to amp up the tension. I’m seeing it even in Harry Potter, particularly with Ron. Once you see it, you can’t unsee it ... like the Wilhelm Scream). The dialogue is fine but not great between the two, trying to get the vibe together. Tie fighter leaving the hangar bay... Kind of like that. Turrets on the outside of Star Destroyers never hit anyone... why do they exist? One tie fighter can escape a star destroyer!? Why do THEY exist?

They crash. 8. Fighter gonna crash. Hux is fine. Phasma is fine. Kind of a cool shot on the Tie fighter crash. I like the wide desert shots. Tie fighter sinking is cool. Finn stripping is humanizing. Desert shots are great here. (But we’re again following some crashed droids/people on a desert planet?)

Kylo and Hux bicker. 8. What's with the bickering? But they do a good job. Kind of harkens back to Tarkin and Darth (too much similarity?)

Finn meets Rey. 7. I like the monster kicking him out of the way from drinking the water at the watering hole. This is the point in the movie where I started to think - Rey is a Mary Sue? BB8 shocking Finn is fine. Finn laying it on a little thick with the humor.

Escape in the Falcon. 8. Stop taking my hand! Meh. The Falcon! “That one’s garbage! ... The garbage will do.” Fine, pretty good. Cool shot of the Falcon escaping. BB8 in free fall in the Falcon is fine. "I'm getting pretty good at this" says Finn. You got one Tie fighter, dude. (The longer this goes the more this feels like old sequences from Ep4...) Going inside the destroyer is cool (and then feels like being in the Death Star in ep6...). The shut-engines-off-flip-downwards-and-shoot was a cool move, and some good shots in that sequence.

Kylo temper tantrum. 8. I like this part. It's petty and stupid, but it's a good contrast to the control of Vader.

Falcon and Han/Chewy. 7. Finn says “Droid please” (eye roll). BB8 gives a flame/lighter “Thumbs up.” Meh. Rey is a Mary Sue perfect mechanic... Finn being into her is a little meh. Tractor beam is meh. Han and Chewy discover them, meh fine but how the fuck did they just so happen to be there? They explain away that Han and Chewy just happen to be right where the Falcon is, moments after it flies for the first time after sitting on Jakku for years. Classic JJ. Pretty blatant sentimentality by Han that I'm not really getting drawn into. Luke Skywalker map. All this said, Harrison Ford is good as always.

Rathtars. 7. Death gang, Mantoon, Rathtar... meh. How did the second gang get on without him knowing? Fine with this I guess. Sad that Han is a sad old man hauling freight and swindling people. 7 movies and nothing changed. Rathtar monster is fine. (A little like Indiana Jones with large ball-like thing rolling down a hallway-like thing). Not huge on this chase sequence. Another alien tentacle monster dragging hero somewhere without eating hero. (Where have I seen this before?)

Snoke. 6. This is where I really start turning on the movie as it relies more and more on worn tropes. Another massive hologram... who the fuck is this guy? Another... weapon? This speech sucks by Hux. Who is this ultra powerful force sensitive villain? Kylo Ren is Han Solo's kid... mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeh. Where did this new emperor come from? Is he a Sith? What the fuck is all this.

Rey and Solo fly. 7. Comedic + Mary Sue Mechanic is meh. Lots of references to old Star Wars here. Luke is running away? Why? (Is JJ opening mysteries that won't be closed?) Rey saying “I didn’t realize a planet could be this green” is a nice touch.

Han offers Rey a job. 7. Why is Rey so attached to Jakku and her parents who have been gone for so long? Meh.

Maz Kanata's. 5. Cantina 2... I really expected to like it better than I did, and I didn’t expect to like it that well. Really shitty music. So derivative as a scene. Relationshp advice with Leia? mmmmmmmeh. Empire again. Mmmmmmeh. Finn is a runner. Meh. Maz is a New Yoda, sorta. Meh. What's the point of Maz climbing on the table to look at Finn?

Kylo has feelings. 8. Crushed Darth Vader helmet is pretty cool. Have you seen the “Emo Kylo Ren” twitter? Worth it.

Finn tries to run. 7. This storyline is fine... Finn's a coward. He's in love with Rey for "looking at me" meh. They aren't so much conversing as just saying sentences at each other. Do they even know each other? it doesn't feel like a solid connection. (Kind of like another heterogeneous faux-mance of yore?)

Rey finds Luke's lightsaber. 8. I wrote: “At least it was a pretty interesting vision. Captivating. Lightsaber calls to her! interesting. Nobody waiting for you in Jakku. She runs away... interesting, OK, good.”

Starkiller. 1. Wait... the new base is a planet. It's a third fucking death star. Hux makes a shitty Nazi speech. What the flying fuck is this shit. Are we in the same system here? How did they build this weapon so easily when the Empire collapsed? How come people can see the weapon destroying the entire planetary system? What the shit. Fuck that. It looked cool at least, but this is a fatal and inexcusable flaw in this film.

BB8 Macguffin. 4. Sick of BB8 as the macguffin too, now. Rey wants to run, fine.

First order attacks Maz's. 2. Meh. Give lightsaber to the team. How is the First Order here? Is everything in the galaxy really fucking close to each other? What is going on? Kylo is here too? And now Finn is going use a lightsaber. And Han can shoot without looking. And there's a TR8R droid with a like handheld weapon that fights lightsabers? And this novice can use the lightsaber and not die? And Han saves him and then gets captured? Big bowl of Nope.

Resistance saves the day... 6. Why are these guys here? for the droid, sure, I guess. Everyone's looking for Luke. I'm sick of this battle already. Nice tracking shot of Poe I guess but sorta meh. Maybe I’m still hung over from the Starkiller reveal.

Kylo meets Rey. 8. Force freezing Rey in place is cool enough. Kylo with Rey is good. Han watches her get kidnapped. Finn gets balls.

Han sees Leia. 6. I'm supposed to be sentimental about this but it's just sad. C3PO still sucking, all these years later.

Rebel base. 7. Finn’s Reunion with Poe Dameron... fine. In the rebel base, fine. Leia is... fine. Old woman. Still fighting. Sad. What a treadmill this saga has been for her and for everyone. Map is partially complete, meh. R2 nostalgia. Meh.

Leia and Han. 7. Is this good? I can't tell if it's good. It's fine. Snoke seduced our son. Mmmmmmmeeeeehhhh. Still good in the kid! Good vs evil hooray! Turn the evil man good! (Where have we heard all this before?)

Rey and Kylo battle of wills. 9. Kylo takes off his mask. Good drama and reveal. Rey is attracted to him. Good, interesting, sort of sexually charged energy and tension here. Really well done scene - particularly well acted.

Snoke angry. 6. I wrote: “Just meh. Fuck Snoke.”

Rey mind trick. 8. Sure, I like it, she's organically discovering the force. Preternatural. Fine, OK with that. I like the stormtroopers walking away from Kylo’s temper tantrum.

The starkiller base again? 1. Charging the weapon from nearby sun... just... pure spectacle. "It's another death star" says Han/Leia. No shit. Power of the sun... MMMMMMmeeeeeeeehhhhh. So unoriginal. "There's always a way to blow it up" says Han. Thermal oscillator.... mmmmmmm. Disable the shields (just like Ep6). Gotta be there on the planet! Of course, as always! (Let's attack another fucking Death Star the same fuckin' way as before - with a bombing run and a sneaky secret force on the ground).

Han and Leia bye. 6. Meh, is how I feel.

Han et al assault base. 3. Meeehehhhhhhhhhhhhh let's land at light speed Hollywood style! The ship hangs off a ledge, duh! "That's not how the force works" meh. Yeah that's fine, but what a stupid plan. 15 minutes until death! of course! Phasma walking around by herself of course! Finn in charge! Meh. Not loving Finn. Rey sneaking around. Meh. Not a big fan of Boyega's over-acting comedic. "Yeah there is a trash compactor” meeeehhhh. More comedic tensiony stuff. Too much fan service, too much hokey.

Another death star assault. 3. It's pretty, but stupid. C3PO "it would take a miracle to save us now" meehhhhh.

Kylo kills Han. 5. Emotionally pretty sterile feeling. I’m just not there with them. And another infinite column for Han to fall down (like the Emperor, Darth Maul, Luke in ep5...) And everyone there to dramatically watch... just... meh. Snoke... boo. This dialogue is just kinda shitty. "You know it's true. search your feelings." Adam driver does very well in this scene with Rey. He's really great. John Boyega sucking... overdramatic. No connection to Leia here as she feels Han’s death. Just don’t care.

Kylo vs Rey and Finn. 7. Kylo is pretty badass. Amateur lightsaber fight: not a big fan. Pretty small fan, actually. Rey is badass but still amateur. Another ledge to hang off! Still, the fight is pretty cool. Snow steaming is cool after the lightsaber slices through. And even, a whole other ledge, a chasm in fact! Meh fine.

Trench run two. 6. Another trench run. Poe flying inside = another DS2 core reactor shot.

Starkiller blows up. 6. Snoke really sucks. Here comes the Falcon to save the day of course! In your darkest hour. Pretty shot. Pretty Death Star 3 explosion (and another death star blows up again...)

Celebration. 5. Dramatic Leia blows by Chewy and hugs Rey, but they never met.

R2 wakes up. 6. C3po *still* sucks. Why is his arm red again? The part of the galaxy that has the map that is unknown and uncharted is right in the middle of the damn galaxy??

Rey goes to Luke. 9. Beautiful scenery (Skellig Michael in Ireland). Dramatic. There's Luke! OK I like this scene. This is good. Super dramatic and memorable and iconic. At least the movie ended on a strong note.

VERDICT

Is there anything else to say? The plot hangs together like a disintegrating, snotty piece of tissue paper. Everything is a crib of something else in the SW universe. The visuals are pretty and the beginning is fire, and most of the rest is obnoxious. Kylo and Rey are actor highlights, to be sure... but Leia is wooden and virtually inaccessible, Han is on autopilot, Finn is trying too hard, and Poe is fine (but not captivating to me). This movie really lost me and even though the numbers went up and down after ~Maz, my feelings were pretty low for the last 2/3 of the journey. Five “9″ scenes - mostly at the beginning or the end - and a fair amount of 7/8′s but also a lot of bad scores. A score of every number, except 10. A movie that scores better than it maybe should have, and it didn’t score all that well in the end.

REVIEW LINKS:

Introduction: Star Wars, a rediscovery.

Rogue One: 6.92 / 10.00 (stdev 2.06).

Episode 4: A New Hope. 8.00 / 10.00 (stdev 1.34).

Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back. 8.00 / 10.00 (stdev 1.29).

Episode 1: The Phantom Menace. 5.00 / 10.00 (stdev 2.08). But probably worse than that, actually.

Episode 2: Attack of the Clones. 5.48 / 10.00 (stdev 2.07).

Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith. 7.00 / 10.00 (stdev 1.77).

Episode 6: Return of the Jedi. 7.90 / 10.00 (stdev 1.91).

Episode 7: The Force Awakens. 6.57 / 10.00 (stdev 2.01).

Episode 8: The Last Jedi. 6.31 / 10.00 (stdev 1.89).

Verdict: Star Wars, A rediscovery.

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