#Or. Less happy necessarily more just like. It's my element

[soapisahimbo]

NSFW ABC - Rodolfo Parra Edition

Finally! I'll be honest with you, this man has been quite the challenge to write about, mostly because it's been difficult to pin his personality and whatnot. But! I'm hoping I got it at least somewhat right and that you'll enjoy this one!

Contains heavy smut elements, so minors stay away!

I'm going to try my best to make sure that it won't be as long until I get your requests out, because I don't like keeping you waiting!

warnings: senseless smut, detailed descriptions, hinted at female anatomy, Rodolfo is a fucking sweetheart

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex):

He's a real sweetheart, placing kisses over every part of you that he can reach, running his hands over the parts that he can't. He mumbles sweet nothings into your skin, some in English, some in Spanish, and this is one of the few times he'll be this verbal about his affection to you. Not that he never is usually, but he's a bit more relaxed and daring with his choice in words when you lay down with him like this. "So beautiful, so soft... warm... I can never get enough of you, querida, I want more..."

Once he breaks out of his reverie, he checks if you're ok. He's not very rough in bed, but he is strong and he can get pretty intense in the heat of the moment and can leave a few marks behind if he loses himself enough in the parts of you that he pays extra close attention to. He's never hurt you before, but he wants you to enjoy being with him. He wants to know if there's anything particular that you did or didn't like, so he knows to do more or less of it in the future. He asks you if you want to get in the shower. If you're a bit weak in the legs, he's quick to help you out. He might feel bad about it, but if you reassure him and tell him that you don't mind, he'll be vastly more confident; maybe even a bit cheeky.

He may be gentle and reserved, but he's certainly not lacking in passion. Can't keep his hands and mouth off of you, kisses deeply and touches eagerly. Insists that he should be the one to clean you off just so he can touch you more, but he's even more happy to oblige if you do the same just to get touched by you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

Listen, he knows what his body looks like - he sees it in the mirror every day. But he is not vain, even in the slightest. He's aware that people might find his body attractive, but he's not the type to get cocky. He keeps himself in good shape because he feels it's necessary, but he's not as interested in flaunting his "assets" as some of his teammates might be. They have teased him about this more times than he can count, calling him things like the "shy maiden" of Los Vaqueros, but there's usually at least one or two people that remind them that he can easily take all of them out if he so wanted and that's all it takes to shut their mouths for a good while.

With that said, he has his own personal appreciation for his chest and arms. Not necessarily because of the way they look, but because he likes the way you can rest your head on his chest, and the way he can wrap his arms tightly around you (not to mention the way you place your hands on his pecs when you ride him, or the way he can hold you in place when he takes you).

He actually has a special weakness for the same parts on you, for the same reasons too. He just takes great enjoyment in laying his head down on your chest, thinks it's the best place to rest and even jokingly claims that he doesn't regain nearly as much energy if he rests somewhere else. Melts a little bit every time you hug him from behind and wishes that you'd never let go.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically):

He's not the type to say this out loud, but seeing the strings of his cum on your skin? His heart is pounding in his ears just thinking about it. On your stomach or the small of your back, over your thighs - it's not like he covers you all over, but the sight of it taps into something feral that he barely even knew he had in him. It makes him feel hot and it makes him want to do far more salacious things to you, but he's not quite sure what that would entail or how to make them reality. He holds back, but he has a dirtier mind than he might let on, or is even aware of. Perhaps with a bit of guidance...

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

Rodolfo has always been a highly respectful man. He maintains eye contact, keeps his hands to himself, stays at a respectable distance when he speaks to someone he's not intimate with, and he was determined to stick to this, no matter how weak in the knees he was for you. He was sure you weren't doing it on purpose, but those clothes you wore that night certainly... accentuated some parts of you that he hadn't paid much attention to earlier (or at least tried not to). You two were good friends, so giving him hugs, leaning onto him, just standing close to him in general was not strange to either of you, but even if he always had been a bit infatuated with you, he never made any moves that could be considered inappropriate. But with the way you looked and the alcohol in his blood, hugging you felt different when he was suddenly so aware of your body. And he could tell that the other men were too. He's not typically jealous, but he felt a certain heat in his chest when he saw them try to approach you, licking their lips and undressing you with their eyes. But the night was not in their favour - you preferred his company over theirs and when you had had one too many drinks, he offered you to crash at his place. He didn't have any single ulterior motive with this, he just wanted to make sure you were safe.

Once at his place, he said that he'd ready the guest room for you, but you asked him very sweetly if you could maybe sleep with him in his bed tonight. Not knowing how to turn you down, he dumbfoundedly agreed and took you to his room. Once you were tucked in next to him, wearing a pair of his shorts and a t-shirt that he let you borrow, he tried to relax and fall asleep, but he was alarmingly aware of your body pressing up against him. He couldn't help himself. He blamed it on the alcohol clouding his judgment, but he couldn't go to sleep like this. Once he was sure you were asleep, he snuck out of bed and into the bathroom, stepping into the shower where he pulled his sweats down, wrapped his hand around his cock and jerked off to the thought of you.

He tried to keep his mind off of it the following day, but it was difficult. By the next time he invited you over, he'd had some time to think about your friendship and his feelings towards you, and while he's still not 100% sure about the order of events that had him end up on top of you, he really couldn't resist you anymore - especially not when you undressed that way for him.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?):

He's no virgin and he definitely knows his way around the bedroom, but he's not interested in one-night-stands or any friends-with-benefits-type deal. He's a very monogamous man, wants to be close only to someone who he's in a dedicated relationship with. He might not exactly have been with plenty of women, but he pays close attention to the one he's with and is almost freakishly good at finding those exact spots to make your mind melt.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying):

Any position where he can feel your body right up against his. He's the type to hold you almost overwhelmingly close, but you like it - you can't tell where you end and he starts. The entire expanse of his chest against your own or against your back, his legs wrapped up in yours, fingers entwined, arms pinned. He likes it if you or he can sit straight up so he can get a good view of you, but he's always drawn to that "the closest we can physically get is still not close enough" kind of position.

If you feel a bit daring and can withstand those big, dark puppy eyes of his, you can definitely use this against him. Gently urge him to let you take care of him, tell him to keep his hands to himself - no need to restrain him - and watch him crumble underneath you. Once again, he never says this out loud, never dares to actually ask for it, but fuck, he loves it.

He doesn't stray far from this all that often, but he's also surprisingly into holding you up against the wall, which definitely caught you by surprise when you found out. Doesn't happen very often, but you're certainly not complaining when it does.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.):

He doesn't exactly make a lot of jokes, but he says things that make you chuckle, and then that will make him chuckle, and then the two of you are just a pair of giggly messes making each other come apart in just pure joy and pleasure. He sometimes says incredibly sweet things that'll have you giggle like a school girl talking to her biggest crush and he just loves making you laugh out of love.

Of course, he can be quite playful and both of you have had each other in stitches, but it's usually because of something unpredictable and out of your control that you can't really do much else about other than laugh. Once it was a very loud pair of cats fighting out on the street just outside your home, another time it was Rudy bumping his head into the wall above you, and another time your neighbour sneezed really loudly and it startled both of you into an absolute fit. So while Rudy might not be the biggest jokester, he doesn't mind a good laugh.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.):

He doesn't actually have much of a happy trail - it sticks up maybe an inch above the hem of his boxers - but there's a rather thick and curly patch of hair down there. It's not very unruly though and it doesn't really spread out all that much. It's surprisingly soft and luscious, actually. He doesn't need to do much in terms of trimming, but he'll do a sweep with the trimmer for the sake of comfort every now and then, especially during the warmer months.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect):

Oh, he's all over this. He's practically bursting with love and warmth when he holds you close in literally any way he can, regardless of if it's when you're naked in bed with him, or in your pajamas, fully swaddled with blankets and sitting in front of the TV, watching bad soap operas. Intimacy is a big deal for him and he takes it very seriously. Hell, nudity never needs to lead to sex, it's just another way for him to feel you.

He's oh so sweet and very gentle with his affection for you and just wants to spend as much time as he can with you, without being overbearing of course. Doing domestic tasks together, taking naps, hushed conversations in the middle of the night - he's all about that.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon):

It shames him a bit when he does it; it feels like it's something he shouldn't be doing, so he tries to steer clear of it. But since the two of you got together, it's become way more challenging than it ever was before, and you've sort of relieved some of his previous qualms about it. He doesn't want to do it if you're nearby because it feels like he's going behind your back, but sometimes when far away from you, he might not be able to help himself.

However the thought of someone catching him in the act is absolutely mortifying, especially if it happened to be Alejandro, so even if he wants to, he might not actually go through with it.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks):

He is not a very kinky man, but mostly because he hasn't really explored all that much. He might not be fully aware of what he likes or really wants to do until he finds the right outlet for it, but if you encourage him to try more things out, he'll probably find that he enjoys things like edging, soft bondage, blindfolds and temperature play. He might have a bit of an affinity for biting. When trying out new things, you might need to show him how you'd do it to him first before he feels comfortable trying it on you, but he's a quick learner and he easily picks up on your cues, finding just the right trick to please both of you.

As mentioned before, he has a dirtier mind than one might think, perhaps dirtier than he himself thinks. The more you encourage him and boost his confidence, the more daring he'll get and the more he'll initiate and come up with his own things he might want to try. You might be surprised when he suggests something along the lines of shibari - he won't do anything extreme and doesn't feel any desire to do any form of suspension, but there's something about the intricacy and intimacy of it that he enjoys.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do):

Bed and couch. He mostly wants to lay down with you during sex, but he does like having you up against the wall - when that happens though, it's usually in the hallway when neither of you have the patience to wait any longer. He feels that the shower is too risky - too slippery - so if the two of you get frisky in there, he usually prefers that you move it into the bedroom. Never wants to have sex outside the home though - the thought of getting caught makes him very uncomfortable.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going):

You. Just you in general. The way you look, the way you move, the way you smell, the way you feel, all of it. He's weak in the knees for you in both the most domestic, loving way and the most lusty, sexual way. He often mirrors you and he's very attuned to you - if you flirt, he flirts; if you're down, he's down. He matches your intention and your energy, so he moves the way you do, looks at you the way you look at him, feels you the way you feel him. It's like an intricate dance that only you two know the choreography of.

While not the jealous or possessive type, there is something in him that feeds off of the fact that others want you but you're his. All these men looking your way, vying for your attention, and he's the one that has it. He's always a bit more intense in these moments, and these are usually the times when you barely make it further than the hallway.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

Don't ever - don't you ever! - suggest any form of impact play or choking or anything of the sort! Not for yourself, not for him, that's just nowhere near his list of things he'd want to do to or with you. Sex can be intense and heated and passionate, definitely, but violent? Never.

Gags also, he wants to hear you and he wants to be able to tell you how much he loves you. He's a softie at heart, all right? He just wants to love on you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.):

He never asks for it. He reassures you that you don't have to if you don't want to when you ask if you can go down on him, but if you insist, if you tell him that you really want to, he'll take a deep breath before giving you a dazed nod and mumbling out a gentle, "yeah, ok".

He strokes your hair, your cheeks, has a hard time looking at you because it just looks so lewd and you're so sexy and it feels so fucking good. He might moan out some jumbled combination of your name, to slow down or to go faster, how good you are to him, how close he is and so on. He doesn't do anything to control your pace until he gets really close, which is when he grabs your head. He does try to be gentle about fucking your mouth, but he has a tendency to get lost in the sensation and might shove his dick further down your throat than he intended. It's worth it when he cums though, because he heaves forward, leaning over you and moaning into the crown of your hair, while his thighs shake and quiver until he finally comes down from the high of it. He apologizes if he's been too rough, but you tell him not to worry. But regardless of if he returns the favour right away or he goes down on you some other time, he keeps this in mind and uses any chance he can get to make it up to you.

Let him make it up to you, please. Even if he's pushing you a bit farther than you think you might be able to take. He takes going down on you very seriously. He won't allow himself to get distracted by anything (Alejandro called once while he was going down on you and you're pretty sure that's the only time Rudy has ever told you "he can wait") - he wants to give all his attention to you. He holds a strong and firm grip on your hips and thighs, making it near impossible for you to move, licking and sucking and kissing for what might feel like an eternity, coaxing out a number of orgasms in such a succession that it might just be one very extended one. He loses himself in it, too, and he doesn't seem to have any problem looking at you now. His eyes glazed over, heavy-lidded and deep and this time you might be the one who has to look away.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.):

He's a slow and heavy one, holding you tightly and grinding his hips into yours. He keeps this pace very steady and doesn't really change it unless you ask him to or he's getting close. He's had his moments where he goes quicker and rougher, mostly out of pure impatience and desperation for you, but he prefers to keep it slow and deep if he can.

If you want him to go faster, he'll do his best to hold out as long as he can, but if you're in charge and maybe ride him, he might ask you to slow down, just because you feel so good and he wants to make it last.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.):

He's not a big fan, to be honest. He might try to go for it a few times, but he finds that it's not nearly as satisfactory as actually spending a much more extended amount of time with you, and once he's started, it's hard for him to stop. He once tried to go for a quickie in the bathroom once, bending you over the sink, but those five minutes that he asked for at the start just kept going and going and going and going... he apologized several times during the deed, but he just couldn't bring himself to stop, and you honestly didn't really mind it.

You did, however, take any chance you got to make fun of him for it. He's usually a very disciplined and strong-willed individual, but that just seems to melt away when he's with you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.):

If there's ever anything he'd want to experiment with, he's doing it very cautiously. Remember the temperature play and shibari? He won't touch upon it unless he's read pretty much every article and every tip and every cautionary tale he can find on it. And once he's done that and gathered up the courage for it, he'll talk to you about it in great detail, with flushed cheeks and all, because he wants to know how you feel about it, and if you agree to try it, he'll go at it with baby steps - a little at a time. He takes it upon himself to prepare for everything that can go wrong and explains his steps to you as he's doing them. You might need to tell him to relax a bit, not to worry so much. It's good that he's prepared, but sometimes he needs a reminder to get out of his head and actually enjoy the moment.

With all that said, he won't ever try anything that he thinks might cause either one of you actual harm or put you at risk. He's not an adrenaline junkie, and he personally finds the sex to be mindblowing enough as it is, so he doesn't see any reason to do anything too wild.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?):

If he was a much more prideful person, he'd definitely be the type to brag about how long he can hold out. But he isn't, so he doesn't, even if you've told him several times that you're impressed with his stamina. He can go for 3 rounds, easily, mainly because he paces himself and has a strangely effective recovery. He has a hard time stopping, he always wants a little bit more, but even he reaches his limit at some point. It of course depends on how long you can go for - it's no longer any fun if you're not into it.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?):

He has never really thought about toys, at least not for himself. If he ever came across any of your toys, it would be purely accidental and it might actually take him a moment to realize what he's looking at before blushing profusely and then trying his absolute best to pretend he never saw anything. He won't tell you what he found unless you catch him in the act, or you notice that he's acting strange and convince him to tell you. If you manage to get it out of him, you'll need to reassure him that you're not angry with him, because he's convinced that you'll be outraged if you find this out.

If you tell him that you use them when he's away and you miss him, you'll practically hear his heart race. Couple that with a sultry, "I can't make myself feel as good as you do" and he might snap.

He never considers using them during sex, not out of shame or any sort of qualm towards it, but because he feels like that's your own thing and it's not for him to meddle with, so if you want to use them with him, you'll need to convince him. Be careful though, because once he reaches a certain amount of confidence, he'll really give you a run for your money.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease):

He's not at all a teaser, at least not on purpose. He can get a bit distracted, rubbing and kissing spots just because he enjoys it and you have to redirect him because he's actually driving you insane without realizing it.

He gets a bit uncomfortable if you tease him outside the comfort of your home, so keep it within the walls. If you tease him at times where he can't instantly get to you, better brace yourself, because once he is able to reach you, he won't let go for a good while.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.):

Not very loud, but quite vocal. He sticks to moans and sighs and whispers, keeping his mouth close to your ears so that you can hear him, or to your skin so that he can kiss you. His words might get jumbled up, but he's not the type to ramble even when overwhelmed. He's terrible at staying quiet though, which is just one of the reasons he doesn't want to have sex if not in a room with a lockable door and thick enough walls.

He might actually surprise you with some of the things he says to you in the heat of the moment - it's like he loses his filter, even if it's just for a moment. He barely remembers it if you question him about it after the fact and honestly surprises himself with some of the dirtier things he's said to you. One of the tamer things he's said has been "I wanna fuck you until we pass out, baby," and you remember feeling surprised at hearing that come from him as it sent you over the edge.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character):

You sat in bed reading a book, leaning back against Rodolfo's chest, with his arms around you. You were reading it aloud as he basked in your warmth, placing gentle kisses against your hair every now and then as just a tiny little sign of love. But as time went on, the warmth began to shift to something else, something that had his heart beat just a little bit faster, and he couldn't even tell what it was that did it. But his hands began to trail down over your hips, and he could tell by the way your voice fell for just a moment that you could tell what he was doing. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, his fingers tugging just a little bit at the hem of your underwear and you did your best to continue reading.

His fingers trailed just a little bit further down and you paused for a moment to gather yourself. "Rudy, what-?"

"I'm sorry, can I just..." He didn't finish his question before he slipped into your underwear and he began to work his hand between your legs. "Just... just keep reading, baby..."

His other hand snuck up under you shirt and to your chest where his fingers found one of your nipples. "Rudy, how am I supposed to-"

"Keep reading, please?"

You leaned your head back to try and get yourself together and you felt him moan silently against your neck. You took a deep breath, then focused back on the book and began to read again, albeit shakily. You don't know what got into him, but he was panting against your skin as if you were pleasuring him, and he kept asking you to keep reading even after you came. After the third time though, you threw the book away and begged him to just fuck you already. This seemed to snap him out of it and he finally took his clothes off, letting you get on top and sit down fully on his length.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes):

6-ish inches, give or take if he's hard or soft. It has a little bend to it and is a bit thicker than others, but not too much. The head of it is a little thicker than the rest, but it only seems to work in his favour.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?):

He's not an overtly sexual type of person, but you do things to him that he just can't resist, so it's safe to say that he wants you as much and as often as you want him. If he's in the mood, he'll approach you carefully and patiently, never expecting you to do anything you don't want to, but you find that his touches and kisses always work to warm you up (just as yours do for him). How high his sex drive is can vary from day to day, week to week, but he's still very affectionate and intimate on the days when it's low.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards):

It might actually take a while for him to fall asleep afterwards. He likes to talk to you, sometimes about how much he enjoyed it, sometimes about how much he loves you, sometimes about plans or things he'd want to do, and he might talk for a good hour or so. If you're sleepy though, he'll let you sleep. He'll watch you for little while, taking in the sight of you before getting comfortable and falling asleep with you in his arms.

#cod mw2 fic #cod x reader #rodolfo parra x reader #rodolfo parra smut #cod mw2 #rodolfo parra #cod rodolfo

[feroluce]

So I spoke somewhat about my thoughts on Emanator Sampo here, but I never really thought of it from a design point of view or what kind of powers he would have until just recently. But I actually kind of love leaning into it from a "stage hand" perspective?

Because like. Aha's body in THEIR official art is completely black, giving attention to all the fun brightly colored things around THEM. And that's so fitting for Sampo! He usually prefers to be a side character. He likes to act from the shadows. His is a much more subtle hand.

So I wonder if as an Emanator, a lot of his clothes are actually very dark? Not necessarily plain, still extravagant and needlessly detailed in things like cut and quality with lots of different fabrics and textures and ornamentation, but dark. Or maybe even his skin itself becomes blackened further down his body; his hands in particular are dark, as a sort of sleight of hand reference.

The motif of a lot of straps wrapped around him like in his canon design is still present, but they're all loose and flowing off of him like paper streamers now instead of restraining him or holding him together. He is no longer contained! Or maybe they're still a bit more rigid/heavy, but just draped more like red stage curtains!

And this is like. Fully self-indulgent, but I love inhuman designs, and there's nothing in canon to say I can't do this, so screw it! Go for broke!! Maybe it's not visible to normal people, but Sampo having a second set of arms would be really cool, as further sleight of hand reference. One set is almost normal looking, but his hands are a bright, attention-drawing white, and the other is dark, set almost in the shadows of the first arms, to act less noticeably.

He also has something of a broken heart design to him in canon (the front of his black shirt with its jagged shape down the middle; his coat looks like a full heart shape in the back), and I actually like him keeping that element as an Emanator, because I think it suits him. Sampo says his taste in aesthetics and views on Elation involve human dignity,

and the story he helps create in Belobog involves the long and winding road of resistance and survival and eventual triumph in the face of some very adverse, oppressing odds. (I'm pretty sure I heard he once called Wildfire "artless" though, plus the man acts like he thinks Shame is some kind of dessert, so like ndkdjzjskkd) But the point being!!

I think Sampo is someone who can appreciate heartbreak and angst and tragedy in a story, because it makes the victory at the end all the sweeter. And this would be another thing he shares with Aha, because I think THEY did bless the Mourning Actors partly just to be a little shit, but also because Aha does recognize tragedy as part of THEIR Path, too, and you can see it in some of the game. So a broken heart motif can still suit him, and I like him having elements of both comedy and tragedy. Like his clothing having a happy sun/sad moon (like the moon in Aha's art) or him having both of the traditional comedy/tragedy masks in his design.

And as Emanator, Sampo can maybe play with the stage settings environment, too. Like lights sometimes behave strangely around him, appearing blindingly bright to someone or dramatically dark. Sampo wills it and suddenly there seems to be a metaphorical spotlight right where he wants everyone to look. And when he doesn't want to be noticed, his face seems to be cast in shadow, he seemingly just fades into the background, no one notices or recognizes him and he sneaks away easily. He can create smoke or fog literally out of thin air without his bombs now, too, the air will just suddenly thicken until his stage is obscured, and Sampo can set the scene as he pleases or disappear without a trace.

And in line with being a stage hand, Sampo can direct attention like no other. He was already extremely good at this as a normal mortal, and becoming an Emanator only took it up to 11, past human limits. Sampo points, and all present feel compelled to follow his fingertip. He looks away, and they all follow his gaze. He can even affect the mood of an audience; he can influence everyone to be calm and placid or he can whip them into a feverish frenzy. Sometimes a crowd will start to become unsettled, agitation stirring until it boils over, until it incites a full on violent mob.

And in the middle of all that chaos will stand one perfectly calm figure, face cast in shadow, until they quietly slip away out of sight.

#sampo koski #hsr sampo #emanator sampo #hsr sampo koski #honkai star rail #hsr #they were talking about Emanator Sampo designs in the Sampard Nation server one night and somehow THAT was what got my mind going fjkdaljfk #there was also talk of him making monsters explode in confetti or making their heads pop off like a jack-in-the-box (my contribution hehe) #which is hilarious but just wasn't super relevant here jfklasdj #(I miss bouncing around ideas like that...if anyone knows another sampard server or even just a sampo-dedicated one hit me up!) #(i would love to join and would probably even have friends to bring!!) #but anyway yes I love Emanator Sampo being stage hand themed haha it's very fun with him #I have a lot of screenshots so I wanna try to use them for things like this more! #I think its in SU where it says Aha isn't as powerful an aeon as some of the others like Qlipoth or Lan or Nanook #so I like Sampo's powers being less direct and not just pure destructive power like a lot of the Destruction Emanators #it lets you get real creative with it <3 #maybe next I'll bring over my thoughts on his mask design? Ooh but I wanna talk about Geppie too... #Geppie protecting his soldiers from Cocolia or the actions he could have taken or his very sweet relationship with Bronya- #-or him being inspired by Serval or his HILARIOUS relationship with Pela... #Decisions decisions...

[pure-electric]

~an introduction to ecobricking~

hello fellow solarpunks! i've been interested in ecobricking for a while but i recently invested some time into researching them so here's a guide! it's a responsible way to sequester plastic from the environment, but making them is slightly more involved than just stuffing plastic in a bottle, if you want to use them for construction or weight-bearing projects like furniture. I'm mainly using information from GoBrik, which had the most comprehensive guide, but feel free to comment or rb with supplemental information.

FAQ:

Isn't it better to recycle plastic rather than ecobricking?

There are many plastics, such as food wrappers or packaging, that can't be recycled and end up degrading rapidly. Ecobricking sequesters those kinds of plastics from the ecosystem and also reduces the surface area exposed, which limits plastic degredation over time.

How do you use ecobricks?

You can use ecobricks in many applications, from furniture to structures. The long-term environmental impact of using ecobricks is still speculated on, but responsible upkeep mitigates their potential environmental impacts, which are still far less than the impact that plastic would have were it not sequestered.

How To Ecobrick:

Find a plastic bottle. The bottles that you use for ecobricking should all be the same variety, which will help in any building projects that you may choose to use them for.

Find some plastic! Make sure to wash and dry your plastic, as any food residue or moisture could make your brick moldy or structurally unsound. You can cut up larger pieces of plastic, like food packaging (think bags of shredded cheese or frozen berries, or the plastic bags inside cereal boxes)-- just pack em in. If you want to be fancy, GoBrik recommends making the bottom layer of your ecobrick all one color, for aesthetic purposes later on. But it's really up to you. Please avoid putting biodegradable material, such as cardboard or paper, as well as glass or metal, in your ecobrick-- it'll affect the density and preferred composition. Plus, you can recycle those!

Calculate the density! This is the only part that involves math, I swear. You want to aim for a density of about 0.37 grams per milliliter; it shouldn't be under 0.33 g/ml or it'll be structurally unsound. It's also good to aim for a density less than 0.7 g/ml, or your bricks might be too heavy to move comfortably. The equation is just the weight in grams divided by the milliliters of the container you're using, so, for example, if you used a bottle than was 1250 ml, you would be aiming for about 475-500 g of plastic (including the bottle). (a kitchen scale is great for weighing, and you can thrift them pretty easily) Of course, if you're ecobricking to sequester plastic and not necessarily to build, you don't need to worry too much about the density, but if you wanted to donate your ecobricks to a project in the future I would encourage you to try to keep track of density.

Cap your bottle tightly, leaving 1-2 cm at the top of the bottle (basically, you don't want the cap to bulge, because it will make the cap degrade rapidly and crack). Label them with the density of the bottle (if it's relevant) and the date (so you know how long the brick has been around so you can maintain it if needed)-- nail polish works the best. Keep them out of the elements (especially the sun) and off the ground until you plan to use them.

There are tons of ways to use ecobricks! I'll link a few ideas below.

https://ecobricks.org/en/build.php

https://ecobricks.org/en/modules.php

anways, happy bricking! i'll post a picture of my finished ecobrick when it's done (hopefully not soon!)

Sources:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ecobricks

https://ecobricks.org/en/how.php

#solarpunk #solarpunk action week #sustainability #zero waste #hopepunk #goblincore

[randomfandomblabdom]

Fallen Order & Survivor Musical Themes

Has anyone done this yet? Here is a comprehensive list of all of the character themes/motifs found in the Jedi: Fallen Order and Survivor video games for anyone interested. I tried to give several examples of each and also included some of my own thoughts. You can listen to many or as few links as you want. If I missed anything please feel free to add on or let me know.

FALLEN ORDER CAL KESTIS - I'm giving Cal two separate sections because I'm pretty positive he now has two separate themes and in attempts to make it less confusing, I've decided to very creatively refer to them as Fallen Order Cal and Survivor Cal. I'm a genius, I know. Fallen Order Cal is consistently heard all over both games. It's his primary theme. It feels young and heroic and wide-eyed... Remember feeling like nothing could touch you when you were young? That's the sort of feeling I get from Fallen Order Cal. It's not happy per se but it's hope and optimism sprinkled with naive youthfulness and an undertone of solemnity. He's been through some serious shit but he's a kid, he's young. The grief and trauma are there for sure but they haven't encompassed him completely. There's still some hope behind those eyes, there's a healing journey to go on, and there's a chance to take on this Empire. It's only until Survivor that the theme starts feeling a little more grounded just like the transition from childhood to adulthood. Fallen Order Cal in Survivor feels a bit less magical, that youthful spirit has diminished, that hope has dwindled.

CAL KESTIS

THE PATH OF THE THREE SAGES

PEACEKEEPERS

A FRONTIER WELCOME

ABOVE THE CLOUDS

A STEP TOO FAR

SURVIVOR CAL KESTIS - So, I originally thought this was a minor key variation of a section of Cal's theme but I've since realized that it technically is a completely separate theme. That being said, thanks to @foxykatie425 in this insanely detailed reply to my frustrations regarding this theme that put what I was hearing into musical terms way out of my element in terms of explaining, I've realized that I may have been somewhat correct. I don't know if the two themes are actually connected, that would be a question for the composers but at the very least, it's definitely a secondary darker theme for Cal as it only ever plays in reference to him and I'd wager a guess that it's the main theme of Survivor as a whole. Compared to Fallen Order Cal, Survivor Cal feels drained, heavy, tired, burdened, and above all else, dark and foreboding. There is a genuine weight to this theme that just feels sinister. There is a hint of Fallen Order Cal there but as that post says, it almost feels like it's on the verge of falling apart. He's not the same man he was five years ago and the fact that this theme is the first thing you hear music-wise in the game and accompanies your very first view of him is an incredible way of subconsciously telling that to your audience right off the bat.

DARK TIMES

ABOVE THE CLOUDS - note: this theme and Fallen Order Cal switch back and forth constantly in this track and I find that so interesting.

NOVA GARON

NIGHTSISTER MERRIN - Merrin's theme is interesting to me because it doesn't sound anything like the type of music you might use to accompany a witch or magic user. It's not necessarily fantastical or whimsical or anything of the sort. In fact, it sounds more like something you might use for a superhero. It's a little bit timid or unsure or even afraid in Fallen Order but god damn has it built in confidence and strength once Survivor rolls around. The only time you hear that sort of timidness to it again is during the first kiss on Jedha which has such interesting implications for her being a nervous wreck in that moment. I also adore how it sounds as an action cue which you hear several times throughout Survivor. It sounds like it comes straight from the best MCU movies and yes, I do mean that as a compliment.

TO DATHOMIR

PEACEKEEPERS

MERRIN

THE WILL OF THE FORCE

TRIDENT

FLIGHT

CAL & MERRIN'S LOVE THEME - Look, I genuinely did not think they would actually go through with making Cal and Merrin canon, I honestly thought they'd chicken-shit out and I was certainly not expecting them to get any sort of love theme if they did but here we are... and we somehow got both. Cal and Merrin are canon and they got a love theme. Holy fucking shit. It just has all that warmth and sweetness of a friend-to-lovers romance too.

FIELDS OF DUSK - ORCHESTRAL VERSION

CAMPFIRE

A STEP TOO FAR

THE ABYSS

BD-1 - I said in my post regarding my thoughts on the Survivor score that these two video game scores are quite possibly the closest we've ever gotten to a John Williams sound from a composer(s) who is in fact, not John Williams. Not that every piece of Star Wars music has to sound like the big man himself, part of the reason The Mandalorian theme was so positively received was that it was such a different sound for Star Wars but I stand by what I said: this is the closest a composer has gotten to a John Williams sound and they have clearly done their research. Some people might not know this but R2 and 3PO have a very small motif heard throughout the films. It's not played very often and is sometimes not very noticeable but it's there and BD-1's motif is not only similar but definitely sounds like it exists within the same universe. I also love that droids are so often musically presented as very childlike, innocent, and mischievous. BD in particular has a very playful energy.

BD-1 AND THE BOGLINGS

MERRIN

THE WILL OF THE FORCE

TRILLA SUNDURI/SECOND SISTER - Trilla's theme legitimately activates my fight or flight response and when I say that, I mean mostly my flight response cause you won't find me messing with this shit. It's very much in lieu of the famous Psycho violins which were written to heighten your senses by emulating screams. I wish we got more of it cause it's intimidating as fuck and a piece of dark side art.

FIGHT AND FLIGHT

TRILLA

THE WILL OF THE FORCE

CERE JUNDA - Don't hate me but I haven't quite fallen in love with Cere's theme yet. That's not to say it's bad by any means, it's absolutely beautiful. It has such a deep melancholy vibe to it, like an inescapable sadness. It almost has a feeling of failure to me weirdly enough.

THE PATH OF THE THREE SAGES

DESERT RUINS

SIEGE

THE VISITOR

ENO CORDOVA - I've mentioned this before but again, for people who might not know: the music that is widely considered to be the main theme of Fallen Order - so much so it was primarily used during the recap at the beginning of Survivor - is Cordova's theme. It's such an interesting artistic choice because I think many people would've made it either Cal's theme or given the entire game its own theme in general. I listen to this one a lot honestly. It's so calming and safe feeling.

THE PATH OF THE THREE SAGES

FAILURE IS NOT THE END

ENO CORDOVA'S THEME

THE NARKIS ANCHORITES

BODE AKUNA - Yes, Bode does have a theme and you know what? It slaps. I really like it. It's very adventurous and feels quite friendly which is ironic as hell. It does get some heart-wrenching renditions nearer to the end of the game. It's the music that swells when he force-pushes Cal and everyone collectively shits themselves. Oh, it also has some dark renditions as well.

ABOVE THE CLOUDS

A STEP TOO FAR

BROTHERS

THROUGH DARKNESS

RAYVIS - As far as I can tell, Rayvis does not have a set theme but he is usually accompanied by high-playing strings and his boss fight music is the best example of that. I actually don't think a lot of Rayvis moments ended up on the score soundtrack which... how dare they.

WARRIORS CODE

DAGAN GERA - I thought Dagan didn't have a theme for the longest time but it turns out he actually does have a tiny motif that I do wish had been more thoroughly realized in the score because it's so menacing and I absolutely love it. It's most prominently heard during his last confrontation with Cal. He is also usually accompanied by low-playing horns. Not always but usually.

RELEASE ME

TO THE RESCUE

GRAND OCULUS

KATA AKUNA - I'm going to rant about this one for a second, okay? I have spent the last few weeks wondering what the hell the melody that plays throughout the track Through Darkness is. I was sitting here plucking out melodies on a piano app (cause I don't own a keyboard) and was like, "Okay, it's not Cal's theme, it's not Bode's theme, it's not Merrin's theme... what the hell is that series of notes??" Yes, I'm aware that not every note has to mean something but these just felt like they did. It's played at such an emotional point in the game and for two scores that already work heavily around themes and motifs and musical ideas, it didn't make sense to me that this little series of notes would mean nothing, especially at such a poignant moment. Funnily enough, it only just occurred to me while making this post that it's fucking Kata's theme. At least I think it is. Well, motif. It's not a fully developed theme but it definitely has the makings of one. That's not even me making a wild guess either, these notes appear in other places in the story that feature Kata.

NOVA GARON

THE ABYSS

THROUGH DARKNESS

GHOST STAR - I'm adding this for fun because I think it's gorgeous and I love it but it leads me to ask: why has there been no official release of Ghost Star? With or without vocals? This is a genuine question. It does not appear on the Cantina album nor is there even a snippet of its melody on the score album. It makes me wonder if the song was maybe added later into production? Trust me, I love the orchestral cover that has been going around and people are obviously seeking it out cause the track has gained thousands of streams in the months since the game was released. It was at 10k the last time I looked on Spotify and it's currently at 24k as of writing this. I'm just genuinely surprised EA/Respawn or hell, even Lucasfilm hasn't capitalized off that.

GHOST STAR

GHOST STAR W/ VOCALS

Thank you most sincerely if you made it all the way here :)

I liked this. I should do this for more scores lol.

#star wars #jedi fallen order #jfo #jedi survivor #js #cal kestis #nightsister merrin #merrical #calmerrin #cal x merrin #cere junda #trilla suduri #second sister #eno cordova #bd 1 #rayvis #dagan gera #kata akuna #bode akuna #john williams #stephen barton #gordy haab #score analysis #original score #mine

[spicyviren]

After reading the case for Viren connecting with the Star Arcanum and him having visions because of it, I made myself a beautiful tinfoil hat.

Humor this giant spaghetti noodle:

This is a vision of Claudia performing Infantis Sanguine.

Viren is initially pulled out of his catatonic state when he sees Claudia wade into the water to retrieve the prison and immediately recalls her walking into a red sea. And this would track with his premonition, but the giant orb in the sky and the approaching wave are missing.

Entertaining the idea that this is indeed a vision of the future and not purely metaphorical elements of Viren's own mind, exactly what is the orb in the sky? An eclipse, a dark star, a black hole?

A full moon?

Vision Claudia drags her legs through the water, which trails red behind her (BLOODUH).

IRL, she's squeezing her blood into black pentapus ink...

...and Terry explicitly remarks on it.

The wave I'm less sure about. Aaravos repeatedly invokes the rising sun as kind of harbinger of Viren's death, so my semi-joking, semi-serious idea is that Claudia finds a loophole by somehow managing to prolong the night or otherwise block out the influence of the sun. So first thought was eclipse which, looking at Viren's nightmare revelation, uh-check!!

AND THEN cursory research confirms that the increased gravitational pull of a sun and moon aligned causes bigger waves called spring tide and I was like, yes very good for me that science is on my side for this magical made up scenario in which the rules are made up and the points don't matter!

SO! Wave is there because SCIENCE says so. But also, eh, kinda looks like sound waves! Like, a nice tableau of Claudia chanting the words of a spell in a pool of her own blood to save her father's life.

An additional element which further convinces me that Viren is having Star Primal-type visions is that child Claudia only skips on one side of Viren's footprints, foreshadowing her losing a leg.

I think the biggest question about Infantis Sanguine is whether or not "the sacrifice" is just some blood or all of the blood, and therefore, whether or not it's something Claudia would be able to do and walk away from using herself as The Sacrifice. Alternatively, she does carry with her a blue flower which begins to fall apart into the water, which if I really wanted to, I could maaaaybe buy as representing Sparklepuff (as sacrifice) or as Viren himself (who is also falling apart and dying lol). Could totally be something else though.

As I'm writing this, I'm realizing I don't know the exact cause of Viren's horror at Infantis Sanguine - if it's simply the prospect of using any part of his children as a spell component, or, more plausibly to me, that he's simply operating under the reasonable assumption that "sacrifice" in this context = death.

Generally, I tend to believe that Aaravos doesn't straight up lie, but I do think he obscures a lot by simple implication and is happy to sit back while people stumble through a maze of their own incorrect interpretation. Things Aaravos never says are, "you must kill the homunculus" and, "one of your children must die so that you can live." The only time Aaravos explicitly talks about death and dying is in relation to Viren himself (and even then, he throws in mysterious stuff about death in tandem with the sun rising).

What he DOES say is this: And I will show you how to use every drop of his living essence to restore your own life...AND your future.

I'll admit that I'm reaching a bit here, but the fact that Aaravos is invoking the future with regard to Sparklepuff's living essence (as opposed to Sparklepuff's magical essence) does kind of hint to me that Sparklepuff wouldn't necessarily die as sacrifice. Which might also explain (what I perceived to be) Aaravos's rather muted response to Viren's refusal at what could essentially be a magical blood transfusion.

Last bit to add - the pentapus and ATLA by extension. This isn't my favorite thing to bring up because a lot of the time I feel like TDP is a bit in ATLA's shadow (but they DO keep making references...) so tossing in a tenuous but relevant nod to a character stealing a literal celestial body from the sky AND a solar eclipse blocking out the power of the sun.

#the dragon prince #tdp spoilers #viren #claudia #aaravos #speculation #tinhattery #crackpottery #noodoodlery #INFANTIS SANGUINE #!!! #.......infantis linguine #thanks for coming to my pasta boil

[adeliethevilsimp]

I have a hot take. You know the line where Rook first time meeting Vil it is actually really sweet if you think about it. No I am not delusional Like the line saying “there is no other actor can portray such evil hysterical the worst human scum role” Usually villains are not written to be likeable in mind. Fun, for sure but probably not likeable and redeemable usually. probably less screen time but still needs to be done.

It is like everything including villain are cogs in the machine that is the play. It need to be done. It can just be done badly and with no substance but you also can have a very good villain to be brought into life by a good actor and be memorable. That make you go“They are such a good villain”.

Personally I relate to Vil on so many things. One thing is that I was assigned to act as the villain. I am a girl but they want me to act as a middle-aged male minister who is also a dick. I have to wear a moustache too so you know kids are going to be normal about that *queue sarcasm*. I have never know why my teacher asked me to do it. Now of course it was a cool thing like MF my acting transcends gender But I wondered all the time why they asked me to do it. I don’t mind it it was unusual for sure. I just don’t want the bullying.I continued to do it because I do love acting also work ethics. I guess I just wanted to know why I was chosen. What I am trying to say is Rook's remark is very horrendous at first glance but it is really like “Only you can bring a villain like that into life. So memorable.”

My take is it was so memorable it made Rook start appreciating Villain. I know Rook also said before “I have seen so many of your roles but I did not remember you much”. It at first glance sound like Rook think the acting is bad but it does not have to be the only interpretation. Coz like you can be distracted and not remembering things just because you are focusing on other things. when I was crushing on Sweeney Todd I barely noticed how interesting the music is. I was so happy when I learnt about the music element.

like there was another part of the cake to be eaten. The cake you think you have finished and you really like. And there is more! Sort of thing. To Rook it is like Vil's acting like as so good and memorable made him realise the other side of the cake he love so much. But you know it is Rook so it comes out weird but also he was not necessarily harsh about it it is just the truth but it come out in a Rook's way. I thought about this because recently I talked to my mom about I wonder why the teacher chose me thing and she said “I went to the rehearsal once and I thought you are really good. You went into character so fast and take it with stride”

I know this is like me saying how good I am. I am just trying to say I think to Rook it is actually something like that. So his comment actually kind of sweet if you think about it. Yes I want someone to say that to me now okay xD

So it is actually kind of sweet Your acting was so good it made me realised villain is so integral and can be so memorable. You showed me something more about the things I already like. Your acting was so good you make such villain so memorable. You are one of a kind

So yeah. And I feel like other people may think so but were too scared to tell Vil to his face. I mean my personal experience also kind of supports this But not Rook even tho it came out like that. That is my interpretation anyways from my personal experience

#twisted wonderland #rook hunt #vil schoenheit #headcanon #i love them so much

[abeautifulblog]

Thoughts on the Radovid romance

A couple people have asked about the Radovid/Jaskier relationship, and I thought it was... fine? As fine as anything in this show gets?

I wasn't expecting it to dethrone Geralt/Jaskier, because 20+ years of Jaskier building his life and legacy around Geralt is a lot more compelling than Some Twink He Met Yesterday, but I did go into it with a genuinely open mind. Everyone on tumblr was gushing over their chemistry, and I was like, Yea I'd believe it, given that this is Joey Batey we're talking about. So I was expecting to enjoy it the way I'd enjoyed the Yennskier content in S2, the rare treat of two characters having a real emotional connection.

And then I watched it, and it wasn't bad, but the relationship was a lot more disjointed (and their "chemistry" a lot less compelling) than tumblr had led me to believe. (Lol, mea culpa, I should have known better than to take tumblr's word for it.) Also it’s unclear whether it’s supposed to be a cute romance, or whether it’s two people using each other for their own ends?

But it did brush up against some interesting thoughts I'd had before about Jaskier and his patrons, and got me to thinking about consent and power dynamics again, because I am THEE MOST predictable little beastie in fandom. 🤣

First off, I'm not sure what we're supposed to make of Radovid. Obviously he's ~hiding his true self~ in some way, but I can't tell if we're meant to take at face value the side of himself he shows Jaskier -- that he's more intelligent than he's been letting on, and is actually deeply lonely in the empty-headed partyboy role he's been playing, desperate for genuine connection and for someone to truly see him for who he is -- or whether that is yet more deception, and this is all part of some big ambitious scheme that he'll whip out in a mustache-twirling villain reveal. There are elements that make me think it's the latter, but Hugh Skinner's acting is also just weird (and why are his eyes so wet o_o), and I can't tell whether that's supposed to be deliberate foreshadowing, or if, once again, the people making the show are just clueless about how their creative choices are coming off.

(I assume this will get answered at some point, possibly already has in part 2, but I haven't watched that yet.)

Honestly, the part that caught my interest the most was when Jaskier showed up at Radovid's salon wanting to talk about new intel he had on Rience, and Radovid was blithely uninterested, just wanted Jaskier to sing for them -- and then proceeded to casually, completely disregard Jaskier's No.

gremble: Oho? 👀

That's a red flag! 😊 Jaskier tried to set a boundary, and Radovid brushed right past it. And in any competently-executed piece of media, I would expect that to be deliberately signaling something. It doesn't necessarily mean that Radovid is evil -- could just mean he's a crown prince who doesn't have much experience with people telling him No -- but seeing him blithely override Jaskier's wishes in a low-stakes situation sets a bad precedent, and foreshadows how he might behave later, when the stakes might well be higher.

...Except that this production team is so HILARIOUSLY bad at writing healthy relationships -- for three seasons they've been feeding us the most toxic slop imaginable and telling us that's what love looks like -- that I have no idea whether that was on purpose or not. 😂😂😂

--

The Radovid storyline does touch on some concepts that I've long found fascinating, about Jaskier's system of patronage and how he trades on his sexuality. How his work is canonically sex work, or at least sex-work adjacent (that's made explicit when he talks about the Countess de Stael, that they were involved sexually while she was supporting him financially), and the balancing act of keeping his patrons happy when they are always, always going to be second in his affections to Geralt -- and how they probably wouldn't be too happy to learn that.

Because for all that S3 tells us Jaskier is developing a crush on Radovid, Joey Batey's acting says something very different. He did not come off as a man in love, to me -- he came off as someone who's acutely aware that when the crown prince of Redania rolls up and tells you he's your biggest fan, you fucking smile for him.

(Why yes, Moulin Rouge is my all-time favorite movie, why do you ask? 🤣)

Jaskier's interactions with Radovid feel very... 'calculated' isn't quite the word for it, but Jaskier is conscious of the power differentials there, and always carefully choosing what he does and says in light of what he knows Radovid wants from him. He's conscious of having to keep Radovid happy, yes but he's also conscious of what he stands to gain from having a crown prince clamoring to win his affections, and what he could leverage out of that. (Like, say, having the entire Redanian army to protect his little found family.)

And the power imbalance isn't entirely one-directional either. Radovid wants Jaskier's affections, something that can't be bought or coerced, and wants his specifically, which means Jaskier has all the power to give or withhold it... while also being aware that toying with a prince's affections is a dangerous game.

........Or maybe I entirely misread that, and Jaskier's feelings for Radovid are meant to be genuine, and the whole thing was supposed to be a cute little romance. The way that Joey & the production team have talked about that relationship makes it sound like that's what they were going for, but what's onscreen is very ambiguous.

It will surprise no one to learn that I think the more interesting option would be the one that complicates Jaskier’s motives. That even if he likes Radovid well enough, he's still deliberately leveraging Radovid's crush on him to get help for Geralt -- and that if he oversteps, he's risking the wrath of a very powerful man. (And that as the perceived rival, Geralt could wind up as the target of Radovid’s retribution.)

Anyway, it's a fascinating situation, and almost identical to a fic premise I've been tossing around for years. It's never quite coalesced enough to get written, but it does compel me.

(Alternately, if you wanted Radovid to be noble and tragic, @coffee-mage-sans-caffeine suggested a situation in which Radovid and Geralt are in peril together, one of them is not going to make it out of this, and Radovid sacrifices himself so Geralt lives -- because he knows which of them Jaskier loves more.)

#witcher shit #radskier #witcher meta #twn season 3

[cinna-bunnie]

thought more about it and Imma move away from The City actually 🚶🏾‍♀️rant below

it doesn't get another year's fair chance, i do not have to try so hard to find happiness and community.. if i move to my other ideal city i actually already have a community waiting for me (⁠✿ ‚‚⌒‿⌒‚‚)

that at least sounds a lot more fun than what I've been up to here and i feel like i can figure it out from there. it is also so much cheaper out there 😶‍🌫️ rent prices are crazy.. i could get something around the same size w as many rooms for almost 40% less out there.

im not a city girl ૮ – ﻌ–ა im a big town/small city kinda person and have more fun w rural folk than i do city actually 😔👉🏾👈🏾 i feel like though i have learned a lot about myself and grown, I've always been v out of my element. i don't feel like i Live here yk.. i always feel like a visitor or like I'm just in between ideal circumstances waiting for something to change significantly lol. i have been here since 2016 (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠) it sucks here actually and is the only place I've been to that's this.. impersonal? disconnected, isolating etc.

🚶🏾‍♀️ anyways, this sounds like a fun new chapter for me. i wonder where the queer folk kick it at.. where r the art meetups.. i have ppl to do fun outdoorsy stuff with already.. aa im so excited (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠) ♡⁠ i was hesitant to leave but there's not really reason to stay.

i have friends here ig but like.. it's Different out here, ppl don't wanna connect w you or know u necessarily.. they just wanna hang out sometimes, to a perplexing degree.. even if you're close it's just more like ur comfortable really. where is the vulnerability, where is the trust, participation in each other's lives 🤌🏾 y'all wouldn't b shutting yourselves in during a depressive episode if u let ppl be there for u, i love you and it hurts to not be able to help the person u care about knowing that they are having a hard time.

i go hard for the people i care about but no one goes hard for me (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) i just think maybe i should go to where people are already waiting for me and would be excited to have me join them. i am going to have a home, i think

#🐇 #i have so many thoughts n feelings about this place.. and am having a lot of realizations in hindsight‚ especially compared to #other places I've lived. 3 other cities and all of them were what felt like the greatest yk? so like 🧍🏾‍♀️ what am i suffering for #what am i chasing? why do i have to try so hard to find joy in my time here when it would envelop me elsewhere? #having to move my stuff over is gonna be a hassle but I'll have help and it'll be a hassle anyways 🤷🏾‍♀️ #the payoff would be life changing‚ actually #i think it is worth it in every way

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hey Raven! 👋🏻 I just went through your #my art, and i wanted to tell you that i really really really like your artworks of Miss Raven and Co. You truly put a lot of effort into your artwork, and it shows! With each new drawing, you seem to be getting better! ✏️💕

As i mentioned earlier, i really liked your Miss Raven drawings! they're so cute! especially when you drew Miss Raven in alternative clothing. I also like how much detail you put in your designs for Miss Raven, like the ones for the Fairy Gala or Masquerade Ball are so beautiful 🥺 and still fit her character!

The one you did with her wearing different dorm uniforms from each dorm was such a cool idea! it was interesting to see how she may have appeared if Miss Raven was transferred to said dorms! call me biased, but i liked the octavinelle design the most 😂 but poor Miss Raven. If she had to work part-time in Mostro lounge, she'll have to avoid two predatory Eels 😭 One wants to tease her while the other either wants to squeeze her or dump all his work on her cuz he isn't feeling it today, then there's Azul who takes advantaged of the fact that Miss Raven is close to headmaster Crowley and makes profit 📈 Run Miss Raven Run!!!

Anyway, I think i'm going to steal her away and fight off a certain dangerous and manipulate Eel, a Skilful Hunter, a Lazy Lion, and a dude with the power of christ (idk is Rollo x Raven even a thing?!).

I always look forward to seeing a new artwork of yours truly~

[Referencing this tag!]

Wehhh 😭 I’m glad you find enjoyment in my silly little doodles! Art is definitely an area I’m less comfortable with, but I do like dabbling in it when the mood strikes.

There’s something therapeutic in designing a new look for your OC! You take the time to consider their individual style, the overall theme, and how you can marry the two to create a cute outfit~ I’m really happy with how Raven’s Fairy Gala Couture came out; it’s definitely one of my favorite looks for her. The Masquerade outfit was also fun for me to assemble, but it seems a lot less cohesive in hindsight (probably because I didn’t line + color it, so it’s harder to distinguish individual elements??).

The NRC dorm uniforms (+ the sequel with RSA and NBC uniforms) was another cool project! I think my favorites from those are the Heartslabyul look (just because I’m a sucker for the Alice in Wonderland aesthetic + Raven is twisted from the raven in its infamous riddle), the Diasomnia look (it gives “fairy tale princess turned knight” energy), and the Noble Bell look (because the extra fabric is nice and flowy). You can see how the environment and the personality of each school/dorm influences her, right? ^^ It’s also interesting to think about how differently Raven might have turned out if each of these places had more of an influence on her life.

Bruh 💀 I think she’d die if she worked at the Mostro Lounge, dealing with customers and shady coworkers and employer… though that’s not to say that any of the other dorms would necessarily be better! Miss Raven would have gripes with or rivals in each of them somehow. It’s the Night Raven College way, I guess??

One of these things is not like the other… Looking back on it, 3 out of 4 of those are basically predatory-prey dynamics there there’s a type developing and I don’t know if I like it/j 😂 I’d say Jade’s the “main” love interest, while Rook’s the “oh, he’s cute” one… L*ona kind of started as a crack ship but now I think it’s more of a one-sided thing?? Like, Miss Raven still sees L*ona as sort of a rival, whereas he’s grown a little fond of her but knows he can’t do much to sway her… It’s the eternally “second place” syndrome… 😔

Rollo has the most complex relationship with her (sure, call it a ship if you want 😂), built primarily on a strange savior complex. He did some heinous stuff and dislikes her because she’s very pro-magic—but I think there’s a part of him that feels like she’s a lost lamb that’s been led astray by Draconia and therefore he needs to “save” and “correct” her. Problem is, he’s bad at Emotions so his anger gets redirected at Miss Raven herself. Meanwhile, Miss Raven realizes the similarities between herself and Rollo, so she wants to be a friend to him. She sort of forces him to be her pen pal (thinking that writing down how he feels will help him cope with what happened). So weirdly enough, Raven wants to “save” Rollo and Rollo wants to “save” Raven (but both suck at communicating well).

Who knows, we’ll see how things play out from here Nd when the whim to draw strikes next 📝

#twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #feedback for the writing raven #notes from the writing raven #Jade Leech #Raven Crowley #Rollo Flamme #Rook Hunt #Leona Kingscholar #Rollo Flamm #question #Floyd Leech #Tweels #Octavinelle #Azul Ashengrotto

[paragonrobits]

concept for my original setting I need to do some coherent descriptions of; the way demons are done in my setting!

Demons are not evil spirits in this setting (though such entities do exist), but are functionally conceptual elementals of base desires. Not things as broad as 'hunger' or 'lust', but specific subsets of those desires, such as the desire to satisfy a particular need. Mortal desires, primal urges and the emotional energy from both actually fulfilling those cravings and the desire TO fulfill them find a root in the infinite magical realms, and eventually colease into the realms demons call home; a seemingly infinite number of connected realms that are wild, dangerous and based on fulfilling those needs.

Where hunger settles down, you might find growing trees of meat, as an example; the desire to fight, entire landscapes populated by non-sentient monsters throwing themselves at interlopers to fight. Desire takes on physical form, influenced by the cultural attitudes of beauty, power and disgust common to many sapient cultres. Most of these beings are not intelligent, and immortal; even if killed, they will materialize again.

True demons gradually take form from these beings, and one that survives indefinitely will slowly become more complex. They begin to think, they actively feel things not related to the desire that gave birth to them, and complexity takes root. Often, you still have a force of nature that isn't really sapient, though it has some motive and ability to make decisions on some level. But rarely, they get just complex enough for a critical tipping point, and suddenly they transform into something else. And often, this becomes what the people of the setting actually MEAN by a demon. They become a truly sapient entity, shaped by the desire that made them but functionally their own creature.

Demons take on many forms; they often have some kind of inherent shapeshifting ability, though often 'settle' into a basic form that often shares certain traits in common with other demons or entities in the realm they come from, sharing traits such as brightly colored red or pitch black skin, large horns, flight-capable wings, a humanoid body, and so on. They have inherent magical abilities that are pretty powerful compared to most other beings in the setting, with a natural skill for learning magical powers that does not come easily to others; again, much of this power is drawn from primal desires, which are flexible enough to allow demons to learn a very wide variety of power compared to mortals.

Demons in this setting are not inherently malicious. They can be, as much as any other sapient being, but the desires that shape them are generally morally neutral in nature. The non-intelligent variants are often driven to fulfill that desire, which can make them very dangerous, but demons in general often have a kind of genuine innocence to them. They can also choose to grow in ways unrelated to the original desire, changing more or less as they choose. A demon born from the desire to fight and kill doesn't need to be a warrior; it may have created that demon, but it doesn't have to define them.

Common demon archetypes and concepts are present in the setting, though often a bit changed. For one thing, all demons are born from primal desires, and not more complicated ideas like 'i want to rule others' or 'wicked king of evil'. They're more about things like satisfying carnal urges, eating food, hunting things, and being safe. As such, succubi might be a very common type of demon (as pleasure is almost a universal desire) but they're not necessarily sexual in nature. Quite a few may be completely asexual in nature, only wishing to make other beings happy (and due to the broadness of this concept, may be the default demon to a lot of people who study the realms of the multiverse).

As an additional note, entities similar to traditional fantastical angels exist in setting, but they and demons don't have much opinion on each other. These angels might be considered elementals of ideas and the very best, most intellectually beautiful notions that people have devised such as the essence of humanity and protecting others, rather than the primal ideas that demons seem to embody. They rarely interact, and when they do, it is at worst in neutral feelings. These demons are not corrupted angels (though such things can exist), nor are they kin in some way.

There are, however, fiends, who as angels may embody the noblest concepts, the fiends mirror the darkest and most horrific aspects of the mortal heart. Fiends, unlike angels and demons alike, are not a natural part of the multiverse arising from the interaction of mortal desires and ideas with the raw creative potential of magic. Fiends are, some scholars believe, a corruption of ideas.

Demons are our desires given form. Angels are the best part of us, become something rather beyond us. And fiends are a mirror showcasing the parts of ourselves we don't want to admit are there, hateful and cruel and spreading suffering on purpose.

#queued #original #ideas

[aihoshiino]

I’m curious as to what your opinions are on the ships in ONK. I’m guessing you’re not an Aquaruby fan (neither am I) but what do you think of Aquakana? Or any other ships in ONK! Personally my favorite is Ai x Happiness :)

AI X HAPPINESS IS THE ONLY OSHI NO OTP THAT MATTERS YOU'RE SOOOO RIGHT ANON

Out of the "official" OnK ships tho, you're right in that I don't really care for AquRuby, at least as presented in the text. It was never going to be a ship I was on board with since I'm just too exhausted with anime being the way it is about sibling incest to even pretend to take it seriously but the manga itself also seems to have the same attitude. Since 123, Ruby's feelings for Aqua have mainly been treated as a joke that relies on having Ruby act out a caricature of an archetype that was ALREADY shallow and dated in the 2010s lmao. I think Ruby -> Aqua would at least be interesting to read about if the story was actually willing to take her seriously and properly examine her feelings in a way that feels consistent with her character and to actually dig into the reality of a person developing incestuous feelings in a society that condemns incest rather than using her as a gag prop. I care less about it being incest and more about it being badly written incest basically LOL

AquAka I think it's interesting on paper and there's a lot of elements to it I think are really neat to chew on in discussions and character analysis but as a ship, it doesn't really work for me in execution. Part of it is that I don't really like how Aka handled most of Akane's stuff post TB and most of it is just that the majority of their "real" relationship happens like... offscreen, in a time skip? So there was no real time to get attached to their dynamic as a real couple and I'm the kind of person who mostly gets invested in ships based on the strength of their moment to moment banter and rapport. AquAka have a lot of big, dramatic moments but I didn't feel like they quite had the necessary downtime rapport to serve as the connecting tissue that would've made it land.

It also doesn't help that I feel like, a lot of what *I* think is interesting about AquAka is really not what the fandom sees in it LOL So it's really hard to discuss the elements I like without people getting Genuinely Angry At Me for daring to say the relationship is unhealthy or that both Aqua AND Akane completely fucked up and that's why it didn't pan out. That conflict and tension and the simmering undercurrent of codependence and toxicity that both of them unintentionally brought to the relationship is sooooooo fascinating but I feel like so many people actively talking about AquAka just kind of ignore that and treat it as an entirely wholesome, uncomplicatedly good relationship and Akane as completely flawless within its context. I think that's both unfair to Akane and kind of boring but I've also really drifted away from the question here, huh...

Anyway! AquKana is the 'canon' OnK ship I like the most by far! I wouldn't say I'm like Actively Shipping It in the sense that I go out of my way to seek out fanworks about it, but I think they're cute together and I like them, especially in the anime - I've said before it was the adaptation that made me actively a fan of Kana and that goes for AquKana, too. Like I said up there, a couple's moment to moment banter and dynamic is really important to me and that's a big part of the AquKana appeal to me. I really like the way they bounce off each other and I particularly enjoy the way Kana encourages Aqua to be a better version of himself - not necessarily in an "I can fix him" way but in that his friendship with Kana encourages him to be better out of respect and fondness for her. Kana serves as a sort of window into life as a normal boy for Aqua, with no revenge or ulterior motives, and in that space a lot of Aqua's worst traits that are exacerbated by trauma get softened and filtered through a kinder lens. I also really love the ways Aqua's support helps to uplift and encourage Kana to do her best - she was such a lonely person for so long, seeing the way she glows once she has someone to shine for is so sweet.

I definitely don't feel as strongly about it now as I did coming right off the anime because it's been pretty out of focus for a while... Honestly, come to think of it, I think that's part of why AquAka didn't really hook me at all. It's hard to get invested in something that's making a character you already liked more feel so bad LOL

Circling back to Ai, though... Ougghh it really does kill me there's no straightforwardly lovey dovey ships for her in OnK. I'm a lifeform that draws sustenance from seeing my faves getting loved and doted on, especially when they're someone as starved for love as Ai... don't get me wrong, I love KamiAi and AiNino because yandere love is pure love but sometimes I just want to see nice things happen to her...!!!

Anyway this is the part where I pull out my License To Be Cringe And Free and admit that I do have a whole bunch of crosscanon OTPs for Ai that I've written with friends LOL Honestly I do feel very spoiled with how many I've gotten to write and how good they've been... I've even commissioned some art here and there. So if you're ever on an internet walk and stumble across a piece of art that makes you go "hold on, why is Ai holding hands with Rinne Amagi from EnStars" or something, you have this bitch to thank!!!

#oshi no ko #oshi no posting #onk asks #onk spoilers

[51kas81]

Rupert Mannion comes up as “The Devil” in his ex-wife’s phone. Really, can you blame her? The guy dumped her, claimed he didn’t want children, and then married another woman with the same name … and then had a daughter. But Ted Lasso’s third season made the case for just how inherently villainous Rupert was capable of being, beyond vacationing with his “dear friends” the Sacklers. He’s hit by unsavory allegations of sexual impropriety, has no issue continuing his cheating ways behind closed doors, and then, in the finale, shoves his team’s coach to the ground when he refuses to play dirty on the pitch — losing his precious West Ham United in the aftermath. It’s all so diabolical, his name might as well be Rupert Minion.

Anthony Head, who was “scared of being a spoiler” throughout the season, thinks it’s a hoot that Rupert was Ted Lasso’s only character to regress back to his old ways. He’s also pleased that viewers got to see a little bit more humanity in Rupert at certain points in the narrative, which made his 360-degree turn back all the more satisfying. “A lot of us are very insecure,” Head explains. “So it’s such fun being able to play someone else who isn’t.”

I know we have more important matters to discuss, but can we start with Rupert’s Darth Vader–esque coat? It exuded authority and you looked fabulous in it.

Well, thank you. At the end of season two, when Rupert gets Nate onto his side, Jason Sudeikis whispered into my ear that there was something similar to the Emperor and Darth Vader, and how the Emperor brought Darth Vader onboard. I then whispered that same thing into Nick Mohammed’s ear. Wearing a coat like that is wonderful. When you walk away, you know you’re flowing and have a cloak behind you. It was a fun little twist to put in there.

Your character ends Ted Lasso as the sole villain who doesn’t get a redemption. This is a pretty pointed narrative decision, since the show made great effort to transform the behaviors of a lot of unlikeable people. Are you happy with this outcome?

Yes, I am. I loved episode ten, the Super League scene, where the whole thing with Rupert and Rebecca happens. You can see part of the younger Rupert, how they fell in love, and the relationship they had. What I found fascinating about the whole deal was, for me, it was about playing someone with a heart and soul who sometimes might get viewers to manifest into thinking he might work out. But then, no. Let’s have a spinoff series.

What does this man’s heart and soul look like?

He’s a narcissist. Jason and I were talking about how there are elements of him being a sociopath. It’s like everything in the show: It’s based on how characters have grown and have been built. It may have been his childhood or his teenage years. When I got the part, I decided to make Rupert an entrepreneur who had money early on, probably from the telecommunications boom in the ’80s and ’90s. It made him into a rich man, but not somebody who was necessarily productive. He’s very good at seeing things and making people feel enriched.

It seemed like Rupert was heading toward a good light in the final few episodes, but then he implodes in such spectacular fashion during that final Richmond game. How did you want to approach this loss of control so it didn’t seem unbelievable?

I played it with the feeling of being displaced. His sexual behavior, which he always thought he could get away with, was suddenly in the light. It was a very clever piece of writing that Miss Kakes and Bex, his wife, come together and go to Rebecca. People like Rupert, thankfully, are less and less these days, but they still get away with a lot of stuff. I wanted to play it like he finally realized he wasn’t going to get away with it. That’s the core: He’s lost it and he doesn’t know how he’s going to be able to pull it back together.

There was a quote earlier in the season from Rebecca that has stuck with me: “Rupert always gets what he wants.” We’ve primarily seen that in a material sense, both what he owns and his choice in trophy wives. But how do you think that applies to a level of fulfillment? What does he want out of life itself?

There are a lot of people out there who think about others, How could you do that? Why would you do that? How is that going to be good for anyone? But they believe the world revolves around them. If he wants Miss Kakes, he’ll get Miss Kakes. He’s bored with Bex because she’s dealing with his [daughter] now. It��s hard to say what he wants, because he just wants to win. He thinks that winning Nate over is giving him a flashy car and giving him a beautiful woman to have an affair with. He doesn’t really think twice about anything. He just assumes he’s right.

The whole thing with narcissism is until a narcissist actually owns it, they don’t know who they are. It’s a mental journey. The whole show is about the way that we’re all becoming who we are. We shouldn’t be scared of building and learning. That’s what makes life. But someone like Rupert isn’t going to go through that. He’ll probably feel like he’s been prosecuted and singled out. He’ll say Miss Kakes came on to him.

Are you of the opinion that he never fell out of love with Rebecca?

There’s probably a little bit of love lurking. But it goes back to him wanting to have power. I don’t think he ever thought to himself, Oh, I wish I had Rebecca back. But perhaps he thought he could win her back one day if he needed to.

I had a nice conversation with Nick last week, and he told me about the discussions he had with Jason about the direction of his character over the course of this season. Did you also feel it was necessary to get further reasoning from the writers about Rupert’s behavior?

It’s not necessary for me. You play what you feel. A number of people were always on set, and if they had an idea, they would come out and say, “Well, what about this?” Jason would throw in all of these nuances and explain where a line would come from, because some lines had come from a place of authenticity in his life. I didn’t feel like, Oh, I need to talk this over. If someone wanted to, I was very happy to do so. I remember several years ago I went to an acting school in Los Angeles called Beverly Hills Playhouse. The teacher’s whole ethos was: The words will take care of themselves. Just play the emotions. Try them out in the air. When you get a whisper in your ear, “Why don’t you try it?” you should respond, “Okay.” If you leave yourself open to that, it doesn’t restrict you in any way.

Nick’s journey was more specific and potentially more complex. I can understand why he wanted to know further details. But with Rupert, the course was cleverly set. Him dropping out of sight was essential. You kept thinking to yourself, Where’s Rupert? Sometimes you feel things are played on-camera so the audience can see it all. But here, it didn’t all play on-camera. Not all is said. The show asks us to have a thought about that.

The last time we see Rupert is him being taunted by a “wanker” crowd chant as he leaves the pitch —

The American word is “jerk,” isn’t it? But it’s not as powerful as “wanker.”

And a newspaper headline a few days later confirms he was ousted at the club. What would’ve been your ideal ending for him if this wasn’t it?

I thought he might go down for fraud. Something that would undermine the core of his business. Because there has been a bit of that. People who have lots of money can be pulled to that sort of thing.

#ted lasso #anthony stewart head #anthony head #interview #interview 2023

[avelera]

I admit, I’m not convinced by interpretations of Ed’s line, “I am the Kraken,” to be implying any kind of separate or new personality.

To be clear, I FULLY support fics that take this route and utilize ideas like that it represents a psychological break, a new identity he dons (just like Blackbeard or even “Ed” when he meets Stede if we assume there’s some level of choice in his personal presentation or an element of performance he’s putting on around Stede) or as otherwise representing a split in his self perception between the monster and the man, perhaps one that is even at war with itself. It is fertile ground for drama and character exploration and I wouldn’t necessarily be surprised if the Kraken and Ed are somehow delineated and at odds with one another in future seasons.

BUT, that said, I try to couch my meta in evidence that I see on the proverbial page and that moment did not read to me as Ed becoming anything new or separate. To me, it read as acceptance of an old wound. It was Ed coming to terms, in the most tragic of ways, with the cruelest of interpretations of himself, with his past actions as the murderer of his father.

Up until this point I believe we have strong evidence that Ed has been running from that day, avoiding the memory of it, much less coming to any kind of terms with it or getting any kind of closure.

When he tells the story of the death of his father, gives a third person account of a mythological beast murdering his father. It’s incredibly detached. He confesses to Stede that he’s avoided killing ever since, at least directly, meaning the memory is so traumatic that he can’t look a victim in the eye or get up close to them, the way he did with his father, ever again. Ed prefers distance and deniability of fault whenever possible when it comes to killing. (This is at curious odds, one would think, with Ed’s rise to becoming a pirate legend. How would it be possible to do so without killing? Wouldn’t he be seen as weak if it got out that he refuses to kill with his own hands? But I have a theory that by involving so many others in his killings and by sparing lives when possible, he accidentally grew his myth exponentially more than the average because he left so many more survivors and witnesses to tell the tale. But I digress.)

I much more convinced by meta that outlines how Ed’s motives in S1 are about leaving the past behind, specifically without coming to terms with it if at all possible. His dream is to start over as if the past never happened. Stede shares this dream and together at various (not always simultaneous) points, they envision a happy future together where they get to be who they want without the baggage of the past. This is the case up until the finale, when Stede realizes he can’t actually move forward, in good conscience, without guilt if he doesn’t “face the music” and goes home to make amends, emotionally crushing Ed in the process.

BUT, to be clear, Stede actually achieves actualization by making amends! As poorly conceived and disruptive as this choice is to his loved ones, especially Mary and Ed, he does eventually navigate through forgiveness and closure with the past he was trying to avoid, and he becomes a stronger person for it as we see in the final shot of him.

Which brings us back to Ed’s heel-turn and specifically his, “I am the Kraken,” moment. He too is finally making peace with his past but not in the self-actualizing way that Stede did. (Perhaps a one to one similarity isn’t even possible when the past events in question are mass murder and atrocities rather than abandoning one’s family and life of privilege, the sins committed are rather markedly different.) I argue that Ed is not becoming something new here, he’s just decided to stop running.

He murdered his father. He is the Kraken. He is Blackbeard. He is a killer and a terrorizer of the seas and a monster. His dreams of completely reinventing himself without needing to confront his past are shattered. First by Stede leaving but second by having cold water dashed on his attempts to use the lessons he learned from Stede to become a new and happier person, because it’s worth remembering he didn’t go back to being Blackbeard as a result of Stede leaving, he tried to reinvent himself as a part of the community of Stede’s crew until Izzy’s “reality check”. Izzy reminded Ed that he’s a monster (in a good way, in Izzy’s eyes) and sadly, just like with Badminton telling Stede he destroys beautiful things, Ed agreed.

I don’t think Kraken!Blackbeard or Kraken!Ed is something new. I think it’s Ed giving up. It’s Ed giving in to the bleakest interpretation of himself. The boy who killed his father was a monster. Not a child trying to protect his mother and himself from a violent abuser in their life. He grants himself no forgiveness for those actions. He simply and bleakly accepts that it was his first step in becoming a man who burns ships full of men alive and this is who he is and he can’t escape it and if he tries, he will be thwarted by the world and rejected by the person he loves. Ed didn’t want to be the villain anymore but the world itself told him he has no choice, so he’s given up on striving, on hoping or changing, he’s decided to be the villain now.

A major aspect of the morality of OFMD is encouraging what’s called “the change mindset” over “the fixed mindset”, in a way it’s like nurture vs nature. Are we destined to be one thing our whole lives, regardless of what we want, or can we change? The darkest moments are when the character accept that they cannot change. The brightest are when they learn they can, even if it’s not easy. Stede’s confrontation with his past led him to take a major step towards becoming the person he wants to be and shedding the person he was told was the only one he could be. Conversely, Ed’s arc in the final episode was accepting that he couldn’t change.

Ed doesn’t become a new person in the finale when he says, “I am the Kraken.” Rather, he accepts that he can never become a new person.

#our flag means death #ofmd meta #ofmd #Ed Teach

[in-newjersey]

Have some takes on BMC personality types:

So as we know, the binary of introvert/extrovert for real people is largely constructed, or at least is not as discreet as is often portrayed, but for the purposes of fictional people (especially ones from theater, designed to be open-ended enough for actors to choose to inhabit in different ways) we'll say we can use it.

with that in mind:

I know Jeremy often gets portrayed/described as introverted - kind of shy, nerdy, awkward, anxious, I can get why this would seem like stereotypical "introvert" traits

Whereas often, if not excessively, Michael gets cast as more extroverted: he's a lot more confident, passionate, and energetic, so makes sense for superficial and stereotypical traits....

But I posit that they're the opposites, just in different settings/life situations that suit their personalities differently

Jeremy at heart is an extrovert - he craves social and interpersonal interaction, and specifically a lot of it.....but he's not getting it. Now, this translates in his high schooler brain as "being popular:" when everyone likes you, you'll have tons of friends and never be lonely, right? Of course, a lot of the play is him learning that that's not necessarily the case. However, we can't deny that his loneliness is not based on quality of his relationships, but quantity/amount of time he gets to spend with other people. Which isn't a bad thing! People can be and often are gregarious by nature, that's normal and a perfectly appropriate way to be.

(I know myself, if I go too long without being in some kind of social setting, I start to wilt like a plant (COVID lockdown wasn't pleasant; I actually started liking my essential-worker retail position because at least I got to talk to people))

All this in mind, I would say Jeremy actually is just a very-unfulfilled extrovert; I think this is why headcanons about him getting into theater/having more friends feel so right and satisfying for his arc

By contrast, Michael is an introvert who is, luckily, perfectly in his element for his living and social situation. We see from the play he has one friend that he loves and more or less gets everything he needs from in that part of his life. He has his moms, who as far as we know are a neutral-to-positive force. And he has his online friends from WoW etc. The balance between these three - and I do think, subtly, we get the impression that Michael spends time away from Jeremy with his online friends, which Jeremy subtly resents even if he doesn't realize/voice it - suggests that while Michael's personal emotional/social outlet needs are pretty low, he's getting them satisfied. It's why his one IRL friend ditching him hurt so bad: it's not that he was unstable beforehand or anything, it's that one of the three pillars of his stability got yanked out.

Therefore, Michael's confidence/happy-go-lucky/bubbly attitude is because he's an introvert with most of his needs being met at the outset of the story

I also think, furthermore, that this is one of the roots of their conflict in the play; being teenagers and still working out the world, they haven't quite learned that despite knowing each other for most of their lives, their personality styles are actually quite different: this is why Michael doesn't really understand why Jeremy wants to change so much, and why Jeremy thinks Michael looks down on him for wanting to change

This is not to undermine other takes on the characters - I have ranted at length about the wonderful mutability of theater in that regard - but I think from the text itself, this reading/characterization actually explains a lot of their motivations and finer points in the story

#soliloquy #be more chill #bmc #I promise I think about other characters too but these two get a the essays #it is what it is #jeremy heere #michael mell #theater

[mindblownie2]

4, 5 and 16 if youre up to it!

4. anything that resonated with you in particular from the marble nest?

Well we have talked a bit already about it, I love everything about this game, I love it as a character study of Dankovsky and the sort-of-time-loopness of it is great too because trapping a character in a box (a time loop and/or a bottle episode of sorts) is a perfect setting for vivisecting them, but is also particularly thematically apt for Daniil because (to me) he's not about immortality per se - he rejects the concept of inevitability, of anything being predetermined and set in stone and unchangeable, up to and including the laws of nature; and death is just the ultimate expression of that; though it is of course also one of the things that the game is about at its very core, the starting point on every level: Daniil finds Simon dead. Artemy finds his father dead. Clara wakes up in a grave. The Powers That Be return from a funeral. The player sees the children burying the doll even before they even see the main menu screen. And here, this time, Daniil wakes up in a coffin; and for a day he will desperately try to save people and he will clash with them and will search for answers, in the Stone Yard, the place he was invited to in the first place, under the tower that was meant to be what he was looking for, now that place being the last refuge, the last hope; and in the end he will lose. It's a microcosm of his story, distilled to its primary elements. And it's done so, so well.

And with all that. I enjoyed the sort of overarching story that was accidentally (unplanned; going in I only knew a handful of vague spoilers I turned out to have misinterpreted anyway) created by what I did in what order, and treating my subsequent replays as one continuity through which he perhaps retains some sort of awareness. First time I played I did see most of the game's content though not everything (due to getting lost a lot and forgetting I can run faster here), but importantly I did the heart quest so then I could get the meta ending (and of course I was going to. I'm Daniil fucking Dankovsky, I'm not going to just give up and accept death, or submit to the rules of the game. Duh.) and it was just after I finished the classic bachelor's route and it was a perfect coda to it. So here we go, I won. But of course some time later I wanted to see everything I missed, so I played again. (So here we are again. Being a video game character is a kind of immortality, but definitely not any kind of freedom.) And I did pick the choice that kills you at the start, for the sake of completionism (which is where the game slaps your hand and says no, take this seriously. Once more from the top and treat it like it's real again.) And so I went back and what I did then, because the first time around I listened to Sticky but now I traded with Shrew for the lockpicks and I thought, what if I go to the infected house now? Previously I didn't find it in time, but it's 10 am now. (I've been here before; I know the solution now. I don't need to waste any time.) And oh my god how shocked I was when the game just took me to the evening in that moment. So I had to choose the time loop ending then; (no, wait, that wasn't supposed to happen. Put me back, I can figure it out. I'll get it right next time.) And I played for the last time, and I went to all the places I haven't before (like the house with faces on the walls, or the executor bonfire party), and chose some alternative dialogues here and there - and of course ended up in the same place come midnight. (It was never a puzzle to solve, after all; it was about acceptance. You can do everything right and still fail. You have explored every possibility and Death still wins. There is only one ending left.) And it's a less uplifting order of events than finishing on the meta ending, but I liked it. I found it to be a good (as in "well fitting" rather than necessarily "happy") ending for him; that he has to accept he's lost and allow himself to move on, but also good on him for fighting for so long. (It is also somewhat adjacent to my personal views on life and death. Do not go gently into that good night, be a huge bitch about it. It sometimes needs to be reckoned with that some things cannot be changed, but sometimes it is also vital to try changing them anyway. Etc, etc.)

Rest in peace, Bachelor. I hope you went to heaven and tried to pick a fight with god himself.

5. assuming the world goes on after the game ends, do you think daniil will leave the town? if so, to where?

So I made this post about the characters' post canon fates but I actually gotta expand on that:

Firstly I think in all timelines he could easily die, in a number of ways. He could get sick, or have some sort of accident. He might be careless with his life; helping with curing the sick post-termite ending without adequately protecting himself, or doing some plague- or death-related research and experimenting on himself. He might spiral into addiction, a slow self-destruction, or might straight up just shoot himself in the head.

But if he lives, I think he is in a very bad state. Physically, because he has been running himself ragged, overworked, under pressure, not eating or sleeping enough, taking unholy amounts and combinations of Substances to sleep or to keep awake, to prevent infection or cure it, etc; the exertion and exhaustion is bound to catch up with him. And on top of that, depending a little on the route and how good you are at fighting but he's been beaten unconscious, stabbed, shot, and always having to get up and keep going, not letting his body heal properly; I think he's going to deal with the consequences of that. And emotionally, take your pick: the loss of his life's work, the feeling of failure, the guilt over letting down his colleagues, the guilt over not managing to stop the plague, maybe over Eva's death too, and the general relentless horror of everything he's seen and experienced during the game...

Now it's kinda unspecified as to what sort of consequences he or his friends in the Capital might face - just losing their careers or actually jail or even death? I think he might not be entirely sure himself but he might get a bit paranoid about it, with the guilt he's feeling, afraid that if he comes back or even just gets in touch that might get people in further danger by association with him, so it's better if everyone thinks he's dead and forgets him... And then adding to that a certain kind of inertia, after he lost everything and doesn't know what to do next, he'd just hunker down in Gorkhonsk for a while I think. But as much as we all love our burda domestic bliss fantasies, I know my boy isn't made for settling down into a quiet life; I think after a period of licking his wounds and kinda just surviving day to day he'd become restless, wanting something more. And there's some weird shit in town to study and he might poke at that, if nothing else it would make him feel like himself again and occupy his mind with something else than just grief and self-loathing, but ultimately the town is lacking in resources for proper scientific work and I don't think he'd be content with just being a regular doctor with a little mad science hobby on the side.

Coming back to the Capital, then, maybe, if he'd be allowed to, though he might feel unwelcome even if he isn't outright persecuted; so I think I see him eventually moving abroad, somewhere where people either don't know him or are more receptive to his ideas regardless of past controversies, and trying to start anew. That'd be his happy ending, I think.

16. [the scariest question of them all] how would you describe their relationships... [including platonic / antagonistic / philosophers with benefits / etc.]

Daniil - Andrey: pre-canon, one night stand that was probably some sort of formative experience for Daniil and fun but not life-changing for Andrey. In the game, I think as with the utopians in general, Andrey included, Daniil becomes in their mind some kind of missing puzzle piece in the plan to realise their vision. Sucks when that doesn't happen (in my mind, even the utopian ending leaves everyone involved feeling like it's not quite what they hoped for). Should've kept it to just a casual fuck but alas.

Daniil - Peter: self-recognition through the other (uncomfortable) (unwanted) (take it away).

Daniil - Farkhad: they don't know each other, and Daniil has his own ghosts.

Andrey - Peter: Dead Ringers russian AU. Unbreakably codependent and mutually destructive. Unviably conjoined at the soul.

The twins - Farkhad: haunter and hauntees, of course. Previously rivals, and rival of my brother which is even worse. Well that's all canon. I haven't really done further thinking about it.

(the questions)

#long one phew #that's what you get for asking me about daniil sfdgdhgj #pathologic #daniil dankovsky #the goblin talks

[monstrousgourmandizingcats]

Having seen the Yellowjackets finale twice now, I’m pretty happy with it and with the season overall, but there is a fairly serious criticism I do want to make.

I still have a lot of the same qualms I’ve had with some of the pacing and editing choices this season (this seems to be something all but the very most uncritical fans of the show agree on), but on the level of content the thing I’m honesty most concerned about is the choice to restore some of the earlier ambiguity about the supernatural elements. I know this isn’t necessarily a popular opinion, and it’s not one that I hold just because I like fantasy and supernatural horror (although I do), but I think it amounts to an attempt to unfire several guns that really can’t be unfired convincingly. The white moose, some of the obviously shared dreams characters have had, and the mall Laura Lee vision all come to mind as examples of plot elements that are easier to explain with reference to supernatural agency than without. In the latter case, as in similar ones involving other characters, it’s also, in my opinion, just plain more moving writing if that really is Laura Lee in that scene.

I appreciate that the ambiguity, particularly about the way possible supernatural agency relates to the moral culpability of the human characters (which of course is specifically what Shauna and Lottie start arguing about in the finale), is something a lot of people really love about Yellowjackets, but I don’t think the show’s cosmology has to be ambiguous in order for its morals to be ambivalent. As someone who is pretty seriously religious in a way that’s much more conventional than usual for this fandom, I believe strongly in both supernatural agency and moral culpability in real life, and I do in the Yellowjackets universe too! Lottie is right--it doesn’t make a difference; you’re not off the hook morally speaking just because The Wilderness told you to do it.

After a certain point attempts to reintroduce the possibility that we’re not really seeing what we’re seeing just overcomplicate the show to suit individual writers’ or fans’ or commentators’ tastes. It reminds me, as I’ve said before, of the epilogue to The Master and Margarita, a Soviet fantasy novel featuring spectacular public displays of demonic power on the part of a character who is obviously Satan. At the very end of the book the Stalin-era functionaries investigating the events of the plot conclude that “a gang of hypnotists and ventriloquists....was able to hypnotize at an enormous distance, and not only individual persons but even whole groups of them.” That’s just the supernatural with extra steps, it’s clearly being advanced for aesthetic and ideological reasons rather than because it actually explains anything rationally, and that is basically what I think we are being asked to take seriously as a possibility if The Wilderness is just a mass delusion that generates vanishing moose, constant shared dreams, and a perception of the afterlife that is more or less internally consistent between at least four dead or dying people even though nobody is in a position to compare notes.

#yellowjackets #meta #yellowjackets critical