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nyxi-pixie · 21 days

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me when im supposed to be studying but instead im thinking abt mori and dazai again

let me go absolutely insane for a second (not a second. this is so long. i just checked mfer its over 2000 words. i need to be sedated. imprisoned. restrained. examined. smthn)

'a young man with a death wish once came to me and i wanted to rescue him but i couldnt' and like yeah. beast mori couldnt rescue him. but to a certain extent, canon mori sort of has (touch wood for long term but as it is, dazai is so much less intent on dying than he was in dark era).

and it just. i always wonder about the actual intentions of the mimic situation. because on the surface, it looks like what dazai calls it, then deeper than that, it looks like a very calculated long term strategy, and deeper than that, its just. kinda sad.

i just think its interesting that he plans the mimic thing the way he does knowing dazai will leave despite the fact that he doesnt want him to. and dazai himself reasons this as mori being afraid of him, that mori doesnt want dazai to kill him the way mori killed the old boss. but thats? not true? mori seems unbothered at worst and downright proud at best when he tells oda that dazai will probably kill him one day.

so. Why. did he do it knowing dazai would leave? it wasnt his only option; he could have set skk on mimic. like 5 second future vision isnt gonna do much when the danger is alr there (as oda says). and in the face of a massive black hole coming right at u or a building being dropped on you, five seconds really isnt gonna do much. so mimic cld have been removed without a casualty and the mafia could still have got the permit, and not lost dazai. (who is Objectively an asset to the organisation.) But thats not how it happens. Mori plans it exactly as he does knowing oda will die and dazai will leave. he also then makes it continually obvious that dazai would be welcomed back.

and ive been trying to think of other reasons for it, but across canon and insight from beast mori the only thing i can think of comes back to the fact that mori wants dazai alive. alive and aware that the pm is the best place for him, but alive more than anything else.

i think he wants dazai as his heir bc he knows dazai is enough like him to manage it, but i wonder if it also comes back to the fact that mori is trying to rescue him, and i imagine his own reason to live (and lord knows he suggests he needs a strong one in fifteen) is probably tied down to legacy and responsibility for the city. mori devotes his life to the mafia because he wants peace and appreciates that control (rather than eradication) of the worst of yokohama is the way to keep that peace. and thats enough of a reason to live for him. but it isnt for dazai.

dazai doesnt give a fuck about the mafia as a concept bc his motivations dont rest on ideals the way moris do. dazai only ever does anything because of the people he cares about. everything we see him do, EVEN in pm era where people claim he was some emotionless rockman, come back to his friends.

its why hes never at the centre of the plot. he cant be, because he never does anything for himself. fifteen, in which he is a titular character, is a plot that rests vastly on chuuyas back story. dazais original motivation prior to meeting him is just to khs, and only upon meeting chuuya and them having their whole weird Thing and dazai deciding to be an obsessive freak, does he actually have personal stakes in the job. then in stormbringer, its all abt chuuya again, and dazai is only involved bc he cares about him (whatever he actually says aside). tdipud is driven by odas storyline, and so is dark era. dazai is only active in them bc he cares abt oda.

even when he has more idealistic motivations come canon era, they come back to the fact that hes doing it for oda. anything Above And Beyond that promise is bc hes acting to save the agency, who are his Friends. his motivations are deeply personal in complete contrast to moris, and it is perhaps the only place they really differ.

now ironically, it seems to be that the only decisions mori makes influenced by personal feelings are because of dazai. which takes me to the fact that i think he let dazai leave because he recognises thats whats best for him (at least in the short term - and we'll get to That in a second). and its not really a loss for the organisation because dazais too practical to ever dismiss the mafia, and he still gut responds with their methods. so its an easy sacrifice, a justifiable one.

then theres the contrast with the kouyou&kyouka thing. kouyou doesnt want kyouka to taste the light only to have it sour on her tongue when she realises she cant actually have it because of what she is. because kouyou believes anyone tainted by darkness the way they are can never be free of it. (because she couldnt get out herself).

i wouldnt be surprised if mori thinks the same way, certainly in regards to someone like dazai who Is naturally built for the mafia in a way kyouka really isnt. mori at least believes dazais blood is mafia black and whether or not this is true is irrelevant. he Does have to actively fight his impulses in order to do the Right Thing even now. And even doing that, he still falls into their methods when its practical, or when he's paranoid or unsettled enough to need the comfort of habit, hence the way he treats aku even four years removed from the mafia. hence the way he treats atsushi immediately after Q appears (the way he so instantly latches onto his older self literally slapping the self pity he detests in himself and in his former kouhai out of his current one). hence the way the parallels to mori spring up most when dazai has just been shaken by something.

so i wonder if mori let dazai walk into the light knowing (or believing) he wouldnt fit there, and would come back with a stronger commitment to the mafia as a whole because it may be a concept of sorts, but its one that embraces him in a way the light doesnt, and while dazai does things for the people He cares about, its a mutual thing - he feels responsibility for the people that care about Him too (which probably ties in to the desire for a quiet suicide without bothering anyone, and also to the disgust he has w the sheep - because it Isnt a mutual exchange there).

i think it was always intended as a temporary thing (five years away from the mafia maybe. the 'five years' right before dazai comes to take moris place). give him a taste of the light and let him come to his own conclusion that he doesnt belong there, and eventually turn back to the mafia where he does belong.

(despite suggestions that dazai Doesnt really belong there - smthn smthn cat/dog symbolism - though people suggest this implies he belongs w the ada and i dont think thats true either esp given the way hes omitted from the group so often. i think the cat symbolism w dazai likens him more to natsume than atsushi&fukuzawa esp given the way theyre shown tgthr so often. dazai doesnt belong to any organisation or rigid group, he just fits in line w whoever he cares abt and wherever he decides hes content to stay. v much like a cat actually.).

anyway, moris idea seems to be that dazai wld realise the mafia is somewhere he is cared for, and he cares for the people within it in return. though it doesnt seem to have really turned out that way (maybe mori j underestimated the power of the ada's one specialty: forced integration into its found family. lmao)

so you could see it from a practical perspective: mori sending dazai out to show him he really belongs w the mafia and shld come back to them when the time is right, thus mori secures his legacy by leaving the pm to dazai and the mafia is led forward by someone who could handle it the way mori has.

but. hes never pushy abt dazai coming back. hes downright polite abt it (contrasting to the way he treats yosano), and he puts an awful lot of effort into saving dazais life. (kinda funny that he sends chuuya to pick dazais ass up every five seconds with no reward for either of them - chuuya post dead apple literally asks and moris just like ? uh the safety of the city?? bragging rights😁👍? - but when he sends chuuya to save the agency as a whole the price is Heavy like. exchange of a member is crazyyy.)

dazai is always very much considered One Of Their Own. his seat is still empty waiting for him to come back, he and mori post guild are Always cooperating (despite the kinda petty way dazai talks to him during the reunion - the whole 'i burnt the coat' thing - its almost childish, spiteful in a way that speaks to personal hurt that undermines any control he might have had of their kind of distant passive aggressive exchange. but. im too insane abt that interaction that my interpretation cld be entirely bs.)

they communicate through this ridiculous game of chess, and rely on each other to keep both their organisations afloat. when anyone else from the ada tries to pull the same thing, mori pulls out contracts for their damn souls but when its dazai hes just like ? oh ur bf needs to save you again? of course i can spare him to go pick you up from european prison yeah not a problem! ill even glue his vampire cosplay teeth in!!

in connection with that, even with dazais commitment to Doing The Right Thing, he does not do it in the right way. hes perfectly content to use mori-typical underhanded methods to get the ada to the right place. he sends aku To His Death Knowingly for the sake of saving atsushi and by extension the rest of the agency (and he may have known that the vampirism wld sorta bring him back?? but he still sends him to die), and its sorta similar to mori sending aku out to deal with hawthorne and mitchell while hes in rlly bad shape.

anyway dazais methods always make me think of that cunty exchange sskk have in dead apple 'thats not the way we do things in the detective agency' 'was that a bad joke😘 ur too much weretiger🌈✨💖'. but like. dazai Doesnt work the way the ada does. at least not when things get tense enough to drive him back to habit.

i think people like to interpret dazai as being a better person now, and i think in some ways he is. because hes always influenced by the people hes around most. but also, his motivations havent really changed from pm era. he still does what he does for his friends, they just happen to be on the right side now.

anyway. mori puts more work into keeping dazai alive than any other character (bar perhaps chuuya - but thats because mori saving dazai runs hand in hand with chuuya doing it given hes the one sending him) which is. aurgh.

mori and the wish to save people is just interesting in general. the fact that he became a doctor in the first place is telling on its own plus the unhinged way he deals with yosano - of course someone obsessed with saving people would want a cheat card for sending Death packing - but maybe i could believe it was just a power thing, more to his sense of control. playing with life and death so that he can play god. and i think that probably is just a little bit part of it, esp during the war.

but theres also the way he treats doctors within the pm (sb calls it respect for his former position but it may also be knowledge that the better treated they are the more people they will save). And the only reason he works w the tripartite agreement is bc he loves yokohama, wants its people, including its underground, alive and all that (honestly it probably links back to war stuff - hes really intent on peace).

so hes already someone that is intent on saving people (and beast mori makes this obvious w the way he treats atsushi) but theres a personal edge to it w dazai, possibly bc dazai is so much like him, and asgr is kind of obsessed w the saving your mirrors bc you cldnt save yourself thing (atsushi. lucy. chuuya with his clone. beast akutagawa siblings. beast atsushi&kyouka. i could continue).

im frothing at the mouth but basically, mori does everything for practical reasons in line with his ideals, his grand vision for the PM, but that doesnt mean he isnt making any emotionally charged decisions. its just that theyre always justified by their practical outcomes. (Especially where dazai is concerned). so he can pretend that theyre not driven by personal feelings but IM WATCHING U MORI U CANT HIDE FROM ME.

yk i sometimes wonder if i see him too sympathetically for a guy thats as so sucks as he is but someone has to counterbalance the 75% of the fandom that thinks hes pure evil for no reason and has no thoughts outside of Being Terrible so. here you go have this from the depths of my brain.

#i appreciate most of this sounds completely unhinged u just have to roll with it #god the fact that dazai rlly doesnt. know. at all. makes me insane #he knows moris reluctant to let him die obviously bc he trusts him to save his ass all the time but the extent of it is lost on him #he knows everything and yet he thinks mori forced him out if the mafia bc he was scared of him #meanwhile real image of mori talking abt dazai killing him one day:🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩👍👍👍👍👍👍👍#im sorry guys im actually not normal about them #i think abt mori&dazai more than i think abt skk. which is. completely bizarre for me #i dont think ive ever given more attention to a non romantic duo before bc im so ship brained but. lord.#dazai osamu #mori ougai #bsd #bungou stray dogs

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ichijokaoru · 6 months

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i feel so so so normal (lying) about them i wanted to draw them being cute in all 4 colours

signature refers to my art exclusive sideblog, @magentameows

#kamen rider kuuga #kamen rider: kuuga #kr kuuga #kamen rider #art by me #kaoru ichijou #yuusuke godai #kaoru ichijo #yusuke godai #ichijou kaoru #ichijo kaoru #godai yuusuke #godai yusuke #<- trying every variation that their name could be ordered or spelled as.#goichi #51 #<- these are the main 2 shipnames i've seen. i think 51 is cute but useless for actual search functions..#signature clarification is just cus like! i wanted to post this directly to my new sideblog but i like using my signature #and didn't want people to think this was like. stolen. because im usign the signature like i WILl be reblogging it there also #anyways. this is the new sideblog. where i can be NORMAL about THEM publicly (crying screaming throwing up)#anyways um. i will probably draw more of them if you wanna stick aorund this sideblog!!#ive been in a real proper art funk where drawing has been extremely hard for me for like a solid 2 years #so this was good! i rlly felt like. good abt drawing them <3 yay. SORRY im such a tags rambler #mine #kuugaposting

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miscellaneous--bones · 5 months

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fuckin uhm. trolls

#im so normal abt them guys so so normal #the porportions are subject to change idk yet #i think most of this was a color test to see if i could even draw them. cuz trolls are odd shapes like that #i am working on an oc ofc #and in tradition fashion it will be my fave ship's third. sorry not sorry #im. deranged <3 #broppy #branch trolls #poppy trolls #trolls

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smittyw · 2 months

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wip lineup of my dumdums if they went and had a delicious meal (in the dungeon)

more ladies are on the way whenever my brain starts working again, but these are the first three to join the party chronologically. they will have names, probably..

#dungeon meshi #ocs #no id #my notifs finally died down after the falin jumpscare so this is a gift for the dunmeshers who followed recently #i came up w an entire au for this and tabled it as i am known to do .... i rly like to think abt it tho #nat #frederick #qamar #<- their normal ass names not what im gonna be calling them here Sorry.#unless i get lazy 🤡

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bhaalsdeepbat · 5 months

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Like the way Astarion lights up at the prospect of killing the Githyanki patrol and his excitement when Ethel runs and he's all "now it's a hunt !!"

Heroic Astarion who still fucking FROTHS at the mouth at a good chase because anything worth eating is a little dangerous. He's still sweet and emotionally available, but he also still needs to hunt to eat and that prey drive gnaws at him regardless of if he hunts innocents or bandits. He might as well try to enjoy himself (and he does. Without guilt. Durge is actually quite into it)

#bat rambles #astarion #im sorry i am not ok about this vampire twink #durge who also still has some prey drive instincts bc theyre still made from the body of bhaal #i promise im trying to be normal #bg3 #astarion is durge's princess and durge throws their body across running water for astarion to step on so he dont get hurt #he's still pathetic but he is also a predator #i also like the idea of that being part of the me vs them dynamic he constantly has to work through #cus can you imagine? e #everyone you meet is a propsective meal and he just got out of his “arrangement” where that was part of the deal #he HAS to see himself as better than the cattle and Cazador kinda #reinforces that kind of thinking #but redeemed durge or a good tav helping guide him away from thinking like that #i think hed still have those moments of #awe is the snack trying to fight back #and be intense abt his bloodlust and hunger #but he'd move away from being like GNOMES DONT COUNT AS PEOPLE BUT POULTRY RIGHT

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tatiejosie · 9 months

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[part. 01] || part. 02 || part. 03

My my, would you look at the time?? ... It's time for some Earwig summer comic 🏐☀️

I'm having soooo much fun doing this. I initially sketched this a while ago but I thought it could be fun to clean this up for a lighthearted summer comic. I'm embracing my cringe inner self rn

You are currently watching this year's Xtreme Beach Volleyball Brawl Tournament - the bets are off, folks! Who's going to win? Will we ever find the ball after they're done playing? What will be left of the beach?

#earwig and the witch #art #comic #manga #ghibli #clip studio paint #im being soooo cringe rn i can physically feel it. its so good #im so sorry for what im about to post #literally the most self-indulgent thing i could ever do #pls i deserve this its my last month of vacation before i start working my arse off again-#im sooososo normal abt them tho. hhaaha.#bro i swear it's necessary to see Bella's fat plump thighs in every panel i promise bro its normal haha its needed for the narration

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b4kuch1n · 9 months

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dip pen ink comm batch 4 complete! for Ezechiel, @ohwwhuv, and Leo :]

#bakuspecial #commission art #the grayscale for these were done on a train with my laptop track pad fksdjhf it was! manageable! but not desirable condition #that was before I got my new current tablet too... thank you my old huion. you served me well. Im so sorry I chipped ur paint to shit #ngl the texture on the new one's better off the bat. the grip's better and it has good kinetic feedback #too bad abt the touch buttons tho... I was confident I could make use of them but alas #things need actual feelable buttons again please I can Not tell where anything is when Im drawing and cant look at the tablet #my eyes are on the screen!! Im bad at gauging distance!!! please give me buttons I can find in the dark. please #even the old huion which has actual buttons I still couldnt use them. bc theyre not raised #theyre flat to the tablet's surface. you know what I shouldve tacked raised stickers on them I was stupid there #well! the more u learn. the more u learn #I'm happy with the current tablet tho!! buttons stuff aside it's nice to draw on. and thats what important. wrists dont hurt no more #almost said ''I miss the wacom eraser end" I don't. not really. every time I used that thang I was like wow you are so imprecise and blunt #litcherally why would you want basically a mappable stylus end but it's 50 times the size of a normal nib and you cant see where ur drawing #especially on a screen tablet. the dynamic there makes absolutely no sense #I can really do the same thing now by mapping one of the stylus buttons to swap foreground color to transparency #anyways. this has been my testimonies on tablets. in the tags of a dip pen ink post lmao #well! this is a late post I shouldve posted this before art fight. thank u again to that anon who reminded me #have a good day lads! we can answer emails together. hands in professional hands

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flutteringfable · 5 months

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silly little wip for another chapter of the poly mane 6 bc its cute and i want ppl to see it even tho its not done :3c

Snow had piled up all around Ponyville, caking on rooftops and crunching underhoof. Foals were bounding around, giggling and tossing snowballs at one another. Twilight sighed, using her magic to pull her coat closer around her. She loved the snow, she really did, but she had never quite adapted to the chill of winter in Ponyville. Spike ran ahead of her, beaming with delight. Twilight had never longed to be a dragon so badly. If she had the inner flame of a dragon, maybe she wouldn't have to worry so much about the cold. She followed slowly behind Spike, wincing at the chill that surrounded her hooves.

"HIIIII TWILIGHT!" exclaimed a familiar voice.

Pinkie Pie grinned as she bounced over, grinning at Twilight. The earth pony's fluffy pink fur was especially puffy; Pinkie's winter coat was always well suited for the colder months.

"Hello, Pinkie." Twilight tried to smile. "I take it you're enjoying the snow?"

"Yuh-huh! It's super-duper fluffy this year!" Pinkie replied. "Just like me!!"

Twilight couldn't help but chuckle as Pinkie trotted circles around her.

"Everypony else is over at Sugarcube Corner; I just made some yummy hot chocolate! Wanna join?"

The princess nodded, feeling a sense of relief at the thought of a nice, warm drink. Pinkie turned and led Twilight through the town. They passed a group of foals tossing snowballs at each other, and Twilight instinctively raised one of her wings to protect herself. Only one or two snowballs were tossed in their direction, and thankfully none hit Twilight.

"Hi, Princess Twilight!" called a voice from the group. A small filly was waving to her, peeking up from behind her friends. A chorus of more "Hi, Princess Twilight"s followed, and the alicorn smiled warmly. She waved back as she and Pinkie passed by.

Despite the uncomfortable chill in the air, Twilight had to admit that the snow was pretty. It was heartwarming to see everypony in such good spirits, and by the time Winter Wrap-Up season rolled around, it would be increased tenfold. This season was always so… nostalgic, in a way. It reminded Twilight of her initial years in Ponyville, long before she had gained the status of princess. Some things really never changed, she supposed.

Sugarcube Corner's roof came into view, though it was almost indistinguishable from the other rooftops because of the snow. Pinkie picked up speed, and Twilight had to break into a trot to keep up. It was no issue; the sooner she got to the warmth of the bakery, the better. Pinkie opened the door for her, and Twilight found herself relaxing as she walked inside.

"Yo, Twi!" Rainbow Dash chirped as she trotted over. "I knew you'd show up! Apple owes me 30 bits now."

The pegasus laughed as she nosed happily against Twilight's cheek in greeting. Twilight sighed, raising a brow as she returned the gesture.

"You two made a bet on if I would show up or not…?"

Rainbow grinned. "Uh, yeah. You always stay all holed up in your castle during winter; I know it's cold and all, but seriously! It's not gonna kill you to come out and enjoy the snow!"

"Well, sorry, my fur isn't exactly made for this type of weather," Twilight retorted with a sigh. "And I don't spend all day in the sky like you, Rainbow."

"You literally have three marefriends with the coziest fur ever. Just ask Pinkie, Apple, or Flutters to hang out!"

Twilight couldn't help but laugh softly at the suggestion. As if to punctuate Rainbow's statement, Pinkie walked over and snuggled against Twilight's side. They walked to the table, and Twilight took a seat between Rarity and Rainbow Dash. Pinkie bounced away to prepare her a mug of cocoa.

"Hey there, sugarcube," Applejack smiled. "Glad you could make it."

Rainbow snorted. "You shouldn't be," she joked. "She's the reason you lost our bet."

"Just 'cuz I lost a bet doesn't mean I ain't happy to see her," Apple replied.

"Fair enough," Rainbow shrugged. She leaned against Twilight, resting her head on the alicorn's shoulder.

Rarity sipped her hot cocoa and sighed. "Anyway, how have you been, darling? Do you need me to make you a new coat?"

"No, thank you," Twilight replied. "I'm alright. I guess I've just never gotten used to the cold."

#fable writes 💫#mlp #poly mane 6 #im normal about them. the normalest #sorry not sorry for being a brony on main i just have so many thoughts abt these horses

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chalkeater · 6 months

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Istg every time POC try to bring up a concern on racism. People will call US racist for connecting the dots. Like. Im sorry youre oblivious?

“youre racist for thinking this is racist / for connecting this to racism” hello??

#‘people headcanon frisk as black too. also a lot of ppl hc frisk as white’#bro a lot of ppl headcanon frisk as asian to what is ur point #also im not saying people shouldnt fucking hc frisk/kris as asian ok!#if you HC frisk/kris as asian then you especially need to watch your ass #you are on thin ice with me #if i headcanond frisk as asian (which i do) i would not draw them yellow #also did i not say PREVIOUSLY that the humans being yellow in game normalizes people (especially young people) not caring??#so people will HC frisk as asian and then no one tells them its fucked up if theyre yellow AGH.#‘UM EXCUSE ME why are you fucking hc’ing frisk and kris as asian’ bc im fucking asian????#someone called me fucking racist??#im asian and what to reclaim this weird fucking design and i also changed their skin tones??#at least im not white who calls them asian and draws them yellow??#fine. fine dont listen to me. dont listen to other asian people and other POC who bring this up #live in your oblivious world where you get mad that POC tell you shit abt this #literally every time Asian people and ESP Asian Americans bring up this issue you all get so pissed #im sorry for swearing at you?? whoever is reading this???#weve been talking about this for literal years.#dont you fuckijng thing theres a reason it keeps getting brought up for the past almost 10 YEARS.#talking #sorry for bringing my im a poc card??#god reminds me of what Chara was talking about last night #we grew up with debate classes and the reason for a good Discussion is bc you have to avoid fallacies right #so that means KNOWING your opponent #but in the internet were all anonymous. which is fine! you SHOULD NOT be obligated to bring up your identity at all #but do you know why in any other discussion thats why ppl online say ‘i have a doctorate and-‘ ‘ive studied thsi for 4 years and’?#and so i just keep thinking. ok so my perspective is i am asian right.#my perspective is i have heard from my brothers and sisters who LIVE in the west and their histories of racism and discrimination and propag #so im just wondering. who are the -eople mad at me?? what is your story? youre an artist who cant take criticism??#ok logging off again to eat my fucking burger #(actually not having a hurger rn but i wish)

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kimmkitsuragi · 7 months

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if i told 2016-me that i will see 2 of my fave youtubers doing drag in october 2023, i think i would probably explode

#in the same month too. besties i don't know how to be normal about this im so sorry #litcherally thinking abt having a sideblog for them if it goes like this 💀 who couldve guessed this would happen #i knew this was gonna be fun but i didnt think i would still be in deep like this #rants #troye sivan #dan and phil #dnp

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crescentfool · 1 year

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i love ryomina

no but seriously. even when i’m thinking about other things that captivate my interest, i find myself coming back to them and feeling like i fell down three whole flights of staircases every time i do. they are one of my favorite pairs in media and are very special to me.

it’s the way that ryoji and minato’s lives are inevitably intertwined with each other due to the circumstances 10 years ago on the moonlight bridge. without no minato, there is no ryoji. minato as he is today is because of ryoji. they have irreparably affected each other’s lives that you cannot discuss one without bringing up the other one.

ryoji mochizuki, who is death, pharos, thanatos, nyx avatar, the man of many names and identities, is the perfect summation of p3′s messages and themes.

minato arisato, the wildcard and protagonist, who has boundless kindness in his actions despite the unfortunate cards handed to him.

the two of them complement each other and tell a beautiful story from start to finish.

minato’s personas capture this perfectly. he awakens to orpheus, who’s flames burns bright, is snuffed out by thanatos during the encounter against the arcana magician. a visual precursor of the idea that ryoji stole from the life that minato could have had.

it’s the way that over the course of the game as minato interacts with pharos, talking throughout the dark hour, forging a bond that cannot be broken, that allows ryoji to exist. minato humanizes death.

november. the bells toll, calling the appriser. and yet, it’s peaceful... quiet, and full of life. ryoji, who breaks free from death’s chains, refusing his role, is given the chance to live for a month. to make the most of the humanity that minato has given him over those ten years. and what a life he lived. ryoji’s life is a reflection of what minato’s life could have been like in another universe.

it is the way the two of them are reflections of each other. ryoji with his hair down is just like minato. they are both stubbornly committed to choosing to be kind, to love life, yet are chained down by the cards the narrative dealt them with. they finish each other’s sentences, knowing each other intimately in a way no one else does.

how is that, a boy who lived for only one month, profoundly changes the course of the narrative? he is simultaneously relevant and irrelevant. blink, and you miss it, the beautiful life that he led.

ryoji is horrified at the revelations of being the appriser. he who so desperately wished to forget that his existence was meant to bring the end to all life, was unable to escape the inevitability of death. in a non-human way, of course. he becomes remorseful. a shadow of his brief time as a human who was enamored by the small beautiful things that life had to offer.

he is swallowed by grief. grief knowing that his very existence will take away not only minato’s life, but everyone else’s. the very thing that ryoji loved- life, fundamentally went against the role he was born for- to be the harbinger of death. and unable to grapple with this sadness he believes that the best thing for minato to do is to kill him, so that SEES can live in bliss not knowing about their inevitable end.

SEES is left rattled, calling into question what the meaning of life is and what they do when faced against the inevitability of death.

and!!! minato chooses!! for ryoji to live!! even in spite of what ryoji is MEANT to embody, minato still stubbornly chooses to defy death itself! and if that’s not cool i don’t know what is!! minato wants everyone to have the chance to live!!

so he climbs. he ascends tartarus, to meet ryoji, again, who is now the nyx avatar. and i just think there’s something so so beautiful about being able to use messiah, minato’s ultimate persona, against nyx avatar.

messiah, being the fusion of orpheus and thanatos is peak ryomina to me. because ryoji and minato have established an unbreakable bond from having been entwined for 10 years, minato still has a piece of death with him, and by proxy!! ryoji is able to defy and rebel against nyx trying to bring the fall! and i think that’s fucking cool shit if you ask me!

even when all of the arcanas have been gone through, it’s still not enough to stop the fall. and yet. minato knows. in the way that ryoji was sealed in minato 10 years ago by aigis... minato becomes the great seal so that everyone can live. it comes full circle.

march rolls around. he fulfills his promise to SEES on graduation day. minato dies from exhaustion. but goddamn does his sacrifice make me weep- he’s had such, such a tiring journey. he’s been through so many things because he was at the wrong place at the wrong time. but at the end of it all, he’s reunited with ryoji in death.

and i think this is why ryomina continues to evoke so much emotions for me, to this day. the relationship that they have embodies so much of persona 3′s messages and themes that it makes me feel like a microwave with nothing running in it.

p3′s message is very hopeful, for me. my favorite takeaway from it is that even if death is inevitable, appreciating the life that we were given and choosing to live as best as we can with kindness (even if we can’t feasibly do everything), is just? really nice? and you see this manifest in both ryoji and minato’s personalities and what they do for the other characters.

ryomina just feels so distinct to me, the flavor that their relationship ties back to my favorite takeaways from this game and im just!! god!! i love you minato arisato! i love you ryoji mochizuki! im so glad that i could meet them! i’m happy that they changed my life! they made me want to appreciate the connections in life even if they were fleeting! they made me!! want to pay attention to the good moments in life and cherish them!

i love ryomina so much!!! i’m so glad that these two could bring so much joy into my life! and i hope that others can have this joy too! 💛💙

#lizzy speaks #persona 3 #ryomina #ryoji mochizuki #minato arisato #meta #long post #(literally)#HI SO UM YESTERDAY I COULDN'T FUCKING SLEEP so to cope i was like 'i will talk out loud about anything and everything'#and somehow that turned into me talking about ryomina out loud and something about verbalizing my thoughts made me feel crazy about these-#two again. i mean for the record i continue to love them always very dearly but like my p3 braincells sometimes go into hibernation bc-#ive been on a really huge splatoon kick. but anyway my voice was like cracking at 3am because i was tearing up #i was like 'THE!! IM! SO NORMAL ABT WHAT ORPHEUS AND THANATOS AND MESSIAH SYMBOLIZE' etc etc etc #so i kinda just went to sleep like 'ok well you GOTTA type it out. everyone needs to know about this.'#and um i didnt mean to make 1069 words! sorry! not really! but i love them!!! even if im very quiet these days!#ohhh how lucky i am to have had the chance to experience ryomina they are such a gem. they make me so goddamn emotional #they really mean a lot to me because of well. (gestures at the entire post) but also they came at a really good point of my life and FUCK!!#im so so grateful to them!!! i love them!!!! the themes that their relationship and characters convey just !! IM SO NORMAL ABOUT IT!!!#they've affected me so profoundly and deeply and i wish i could make better art to get this across. but its ok. one day i can. one day #they make me so fucking talkative like actually but um. i had a lot of fun writing this! i dont think ive had like. a proper appreciation-#post for them that articulates why i like them so much (unless you count the essays i write in my art tags) so it was nice to make this.#admittedly theres a lot abt p3 that im rusty on since its been a goodwhile since ive interacted with the source material #and in a way you could say that like. i need to renew my p3 license LMAOOO but god some parts of p3 still have such a huge death grip on me #and what i mean by that is that the big Fucking Events have such!! clarity!! in my mind!! i recall them and i wilt on the spot!!#oh god i cant fucking shut up. the tags are probably 500 words long. enjoy my ramble. i wish every ryomina enjoyer a Good Life <3 #actually no. i hope that EVERYONE on the dash today has something that sparks joy for them the way ryomina does for me.#everyone deserves 2 have something that makes their brain do a little excited dance that makes them blow up and explode. its good for u!#BYE FOR REAL this is why i have to post my thoughts very spread out otherwise yall would have so many WORDS on ur dash pls help i have so #many emotions and i am so tiny i cannot possibly fit all the feelings i have about ryomina and other things inside my tiny little body

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