#YOURE NOT THE FIRST GOOD PERSON PERSON TO HURT SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!! THAT DOESNT MAKE U STOP BEING A GOOD PERSOBXKSNDKDJDCKEHEKDJ

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

i'm so happy you liked it!!! wow, you're just as insane as I am. life is good. our thoughts are in sync. the tragedy that speaks to the core. thank YOU. it's refreshing to let your slightly crazy thoughts out there and be welcomed. im absolutely insane for their dynamic (im dying to live this). you have no idea (im losing it). i personally think gojo would be relieved once he's king, he's in control now, it's natural to him. there are more possibilities and he's so prepared. but you know what? becoming king has its duties and one of them is that prince!gojo's hand has been promised before he was born. i wonder how he'd cope with that knowing he belongs to someone else. i like to think he'd rebel and refuse the marriage completely (for personal, selfish reasons), but again he isn't childish in the sense of ignoring politics completely, yes? behind playful comments he is indeed a smart man. after all, he was raised to become this. he knows how to navigate the world and understands that his decisions can have massive political impact (and that this can also be negative for his knight, right? he cannot risk losing the power and privileges he owns, how would he be able to protect them? he must play the game as is). i think this might be one of the moments in his life where he'll be the most conflicted. but he'd play nice and polite when his fiance comes to visit him (i think due to gojo's natural disdain for his fiance, casual visits would be encouraged a few weeks before marriage). the first sting of jealousy knight!reader feels and oh. that's when they realize the nature of their feelings for prince!gojo. that it goes a little beyond what they thought. their dynamic might shift a little, things become uncertain and confused. knight!reader might dissociate between it all, not allowing selfish feelings to get in the way. and gojo's so annoyed and he wishes the whole building would just collapse and burn with everyone in it. and there knight!reader is, not so far away, shining only for his eyes. prince!gojo looks at them like begging for forgiveness, help, love and sadness all together while the lady by his side tries to get his attention. it's pathetic, he thinks. but his heart is somewhere else, it belongs to someone else for fucking sake!!! can't anyone see that? their first kiss would probably happen during this time I think. i can see him finding knight!reader at night, carrying the weight of the kingdom on his shoulders. and when his eyes land on them relief washes over him. soft moonlight shyly on knight's confused face asking 'satoru, are you okay?' vulnerability! comfort! home! because they belong to each other deeply, a mere look on each others face is enough to understand something is wrong. the kiss!! his little act of rebellion. he's so proud of it after, it's cute af. can you see? the blushing and all!! difficult times, ah the hurt!! at the end,,, i think ruling by himself is much gojo like, right? it would be somewhat controversial and there would be implications but to him it wouldn't be fair to fill a promise he didn't make, plus he's committed to his knight!reader already. ye? he'd learn so much and mature during this period as well. he'd find strength in his love and his love alone. it fills him with a supernatural sense of responsibility that he finally understands that knight!reader went through (though only a little, as he doesn't get his hands dirty nor commit acts of violence (i hope he does, sincerely)). and yess,,, sorry, it was too much again. or if it doesnt resonate with you, haha. omg. i am simply happy in my element talking to you. yes, uhm. you can call me momo/crazymomo if thats ok? it was supposed to be 'crazymomo' but i guess it kind got f'ed up in the way and i just didnt care about fixing it. im bringing you cake ok!!!!!

HI MOMOOO u r feeding us yet again!!!!! and same same same, its so fun to be insane together i appreciate u sm <333 mickey rlly is a genius bc ive never seen a character/reader dynamic thats caused as much insanity as knight!reader & prince!gojo they had me in a chokehold from the get-go

and OHHH these thoughts momo!!!! so tasty and interesting, i lovelovelove hearing more abt how u interpret them!! when it comes to dynamics like these i feel like everyone has their own take on them at least to some degree and i think its SOSO fun to compare!!!!

BUT OKOK let me get thru this!!! i had so much fun reading this and thinking abt it, u brought up so many things i hadnt considered yet!!

OK SO. king!gojo…… after some contemplation i think i definitely agree w u momo. i feel like satoru relaxes once he has the throne. its tough and a huge responsibility, a weight on his shoulders, but its no longer hanging over him as a burden he’ll one day have to bear, its something he’s gained and grown used to and i think he earnestly loves making a change in the society he lives in. and!! i think he is soso loved. i see him as the type to visit poorer villages all the time, financially support struggling mothers, speak to their babies and hold them all gently HES JUST SO… hes such a good man im gonna be sick. ABSOLUTELY helps all orphans he comes across they may or may not remind him of a certain knight so he cant bear to look away from them

(i do think he still longs to run away w knight!reader tho…. its just a nice daydream to him atp bc its impossible in so many ways but i think he hates the fact that being king means hes moved even further above them on the social ladder)

BUT ANYHOW ANYHOW lets get to the juicy bits. the engagement bits. i have my own take on this that differs from urs a little bit momo but i think urs is soso good and nice and romantic… and i agree on a lot too!! specifically this ohhh u get him soso well!!

behind playful comments he is indeed a smart man. after all, he was raised to become this. 

(…)

(and that this can also be negative for his knight, right? he cannot risk losing the power and privileges he owns, how would he be able to protect them? he must play the game as is.)

^ i agree soso much!!!! i think prince!gojo is very very clever, he enjoys acting goofy and has a very genuinely silly side but i do think hes both intelligent and mature. especially when it comes to politics, both for the sake of his own sense of duty AND what you said — for the sake of knight!reader!! they’re his motivation to become king in the first place, so i don’t see him doing anything that’ll cause too much of a stir; but at the same time… he gets away with a lot.

i do think rejecting his fiancee completely as a prince might be too much (his parents let him do as he pleases for the most part, but theyre not fun to deal with when they start to feel threatened lol), but once hes become king… well.

i think you’re right, momo!! he chooses to lead the nation on his own, with no queen by his side — only one very loyal knight. 

(on the topic of heirs though since thats kind of connected to this… obviously his decision causes quite a stir. who will lead the kingdom when hes gone? a king with no firstborn — how scandalous. and so on.

but satoru doesn’t care. he continues to live his life, do his duty. visiting villages, dealing with neighouring countries… and, well. maybe one day he happens to run into a particularly clever assassin, with a scar on his bottom lip, escaping by the skin of his teeth and thanks to his knight — and, who knows? maybe said assassin, bleeding out, murmurs something about a child, a run-down building, a young life soon to be lost… and maybe satoru finds said child. maybe he even feels compelled to look after him, just for a while, because that unruly hair and those guarded eyes remind him a bit too much of a certain someone.

and if satoru grows fond of said boy, if he raises him as a candidate for the throne, but with an understanding and sympathy that he never received himself — then that’s no one’s business but his own.)

my bad i got carried away PHDKFJFJ back to the topic at hand. (i just needed to bring gumi into this narrative hes my special little boy ALSO maybe just maybe suguru finds an orphaned boy in the woods w pink hair who he takes in and raises as a knight hmmmm.. wonder what that’s all about…..) SORRY IM SORRY theres. so much to think abt when it comes to this au…………..

but anyways. i think satoru abolishes the marriage the moment he becomes king — but until then hes polite, well-mannered, maybe even a tad friendly w his fiancee. just to make it easier for the both of them. he does however make it very, very clear that this is a business partnership in his mind — its not a marriage of love, it never will be. and he’s firm about it. he has no intention of leading her on.

i think he might even go as far as to say his heart belongs to someone else (hes giggling on the inside bro gets butterflies at the thought of belonging to his knight in any way shape or form), with no specifics since he doesnt want to get knight!reader into any kind of trouble with the royal court.

but yes!! this is where i think our takes differ a bit (not at ALL a bad thing i just need to make that clear!!) bc i dont rlly see knight!reader being jealous!! i see their relationship with satoru as very comfortable, w a strong sense of understanding between them. it isnt entirely romantic or entirely platonic — if i had to put it in simple terms i’d just call them soulmates. they were born to save each other. and i think both of them understand that! knight!reader is well aware that satoru doesnt feel a single thing for his fiancee, because he makes it so clear that no one has a place at his side except for knight!reader themselves. so in that sense i dont see that uncertainty appearing!! i think the only one between them who feels frustrated is satoru.

and gojo's so annoyed and he wishes the whole building would just collapse and burn with everyone in it. <- THIS IS SOOOO CANON TO ME BTW i think that when ppl are being annoying around the castle a tiny voice in his head is like ”i hope this building fucking explodes” PHDNDBD HES SO DRAMATIC…. but in this case i think hes just so frustrated, especially if his fiancee/parents make the whole engagement more troublesome than it has to be.

on that note i just gotta mention;

and there knight!reader is, not so far away, shining only for his eyes. prince!gojo looks at them like begging for forgiveness, help, love and sadness all together while the lady by his side tries to get his attention. it's pathetic, he thinks. <- GOD THIS ONE GOT ME THIS ONE GOT ME GOOD momo pls stop im in agony </3 ohhh the way his eyes reflect his soul those sad sad puppydog eyes ☹️☹️ i would fold instantly

so in simple terms!! i think knight!reader and toru feel very at home in their dynamic. i dont think knight!reader would mind at all if satoru got a fiancee — if she made him happy i think they’d even grow fond of her. theyre just very kind and accepting, and dedicated to their prince’s happiness above all else. (but, of course, satoru’s happiness only ever lies with them 😔 stupid silly dense knight.) 

BUT THE KISSSS OHHH THE KISS MOMO…. i see your vision so SO clearly. i picture their kiss by the riverbank like this too — satoru does it w/o thinking overcome by fondness and hes all giggly and giddy after. hes just happy to be alive PDJJDFJ 100% goes for a forehead kiss right after bc his heart is just bursting at the seams and his favorite person ever is right there in front of him!! all blushy and unsure!!! ohhh hes OBSESSED momo u get it ofc u do… ur version of events is so lovely and sweet!! i can really picture is so vividly!!

ANYWAY that was so fun pls never apologize, i lovelovelove long asks like this!! it was such a treat to read!! <33 IM BRINGING U A BIG CAKE TOO tysm for blessing us w this 🎂 (lets share it hehe 🍰🍰) (+ extra piece for mickey in case they see this here u go mickey 🍰)

#this was so fun to think abt i cant thank u enough momo <333 sending u alllll the good vibes!! #ALSOOOOO i think crazymmooo is the cutest name EVER its like ur a lil baby cow!!! so cute!!!! #anyway i know i keep saying this but i really am being dragged down to the pits of insanity #just recently alexis infected me w knight!sugu x royalty reader and now im thinking abt them too 😔😔 it never ends #ask tag ✩

[zushimart]

assorted scara ramblings frm dms w/the besties. wherein i discuss the Themes of his character that i most enjoy& Elaborate upon them messily.

i like the awkwardness . distant feeling frm others, never feeling fully human. but desperately craving closeness & community. mixed w like the unfounded & then Founded fear of rejection from that very thing ...

& the reality of ur existence being so unimportant to ur own mother, that even after revealing urself to be alive and free and even Evil — hoping maybe she will regret forsaking u the once & has reflected in the centuries since — she still makes no attempt to connect & dismisses u as something she cannot interfere w. reaching out in every way u know for her attention & it is still hopelessly out of reach . Everyone being hopelessly out of reach ....

being treated like an accessory to something else, a means to an end. internalizing worth measured by utility.. a blunt tool. abandon humanity because u were never human to begin with. and not-humans shouldnt cry, they dont feel, right and wrong don't exist for a knife or a wrench or a shovel. u can't hurt a knife or a wrench or a shovel. your anger, your sadness are useless and unfounded.

i think its just everhthing like the self loathing that festers frm beginning to end of these thought processes. (being born "wrong", rejection, the constant anxiety of a caregiver or person u care about growing to resent you for your Needs - getting frustrated or angry with u the moment ur more trouble to b around than not. that u will no longer be Worth it, worth putting up with).

hits every single theme i like from longing, being stripped from innocence/disillusionment, self hatred, trying to Think a different way because its just so incapacitating to feel so much. Like wanting to be loved so much it consumes every waking second of ur day, every minute of the day spent ruminating on what could possibly be wrong with you. What is the thing that makes it so hard for you to be loved unconditionally, where is that flaw to fix it. until ur mind twists itself into thinking you were never Meant to b loved like that in the first place. that u desire something that was never meant for u . & yet u still want it so so so much, so much so u want to become someThing else. throwing a fit crying shitting screaming for someone to love u that u try and defy the heavens to become a god so that maybe u'd be Worshipped because nothing else is working. overthrow the Divine & reshaping the universe into one where someone will tell u that u are good . proving to others that u can be worth it. proving to Yourself that u can be worth it.

but even in the end he is still the thing he doesnt want to be . pathetic &emotional & raw & sad & angry, everything he hates about himself. it reminds me of a depressive spiral, crying over ur worth and thinking "Whats the use in this ?" because it's the Doing of the very thing u hate about yourself. The part of u that is so selfish in Action. How u can be so useless & on top of it all, still wish for someone to put in the emotional labor to hold u & comfort you & tell u that u are not…

#soooo obsessed with him #Like when longing & desire is so overpowering it feels physical and aching and like #Thats what hell feels like for sure #meta #scaramouche

[gengenbelches111]

cyno belching and vomiting headcannons cause im obsessed with him~<3

Cyno  headcannons~

Includes:

________

Belching

Drinking

Vomiting

Gass

Puppy talk

Swear words

Storylines~

Enjoy!

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Well  cyno is a drinker..and he drinks whenever he plays TCG.

He plays TCG almost every sing day,which involves drinking with Kaveh,

Tighnari,and Alhaitham.

Cyno can hold his liquor unlike kaveh and Tighnari.But,he gets SUPER gassy when he is drunk.

He would be in the middle of choosing a good card to beat Alhaitham with,

But is interrupted by one of his out bursting burps and just sighs and continuously chooses his cards.

Now,if he burps near tighnari,he would usually say something like “damn” or “nice one” becasue tighnari is a Fennec fox,he is immune to gasses.

In front of kaveh,well he rather not do..only because Kaveh is a SEVERE 

Germaphob,so anything considered “nasty” he will give the person a whole lecture on why not to do that.

Whenever he burps infront of Alhaitham,Cyno would tend to say”and that was for the fucking card you played”And of coarse,Alhaitham would try to do better than Cyno when it comes to burping.

Cyno feels guilty if he ever burps in front of collei.Only because he thinks woman wont be on that side of men,And when collei ask Tighnari if cyno ever burps,cyno would flee the facility!~

Now Cyno’s normal burps,he would just pat his stomach in relief.and move on.They usually last for about 3 seconds,But if he drinks anything Carbonated,they tend to be 5 seconds and sometimes make his stomach clear!

He is one of those people when ever they havent ate anything,they would burp in queasiness.he would burp if he only had one thing for breakfast,and feel nauseous that entire day~

He would also burp whenever someone is either talking to loud or long to make them stop talking lol.

Cyno doesnt joke about burping but whenever he does,it would be because someone else did it..he would say something like “damn that was a fucking lion” or “that needs to get checked out ahah” just to lighten the mood!

When cyno has a stomach ache,his burps would be super big and long,somtimes wet!

The would be airy a bit when he gets the first stomach cramp,but when the pain continues to throb in his gut,they become long,loud,and super painful to let out.

Quick Story of Cyno’s Stomach aches~!

_________________________________________________________________________________________

One peaceful day in Ghandarvaville,Cyno roams around like the bear he is.He had some of Kaveh’s Fried Chicken the night before .He was pretty gassy in his sleep,letting out belches that would spring up when he got up to go use the bathroom or drink something and even sitting up in general!

He was standing as Stoic and quit as he would,until a shiver ran down his back,a gut wrenching pain hit his stomach.Cyno didnt know what to do but just say “fuck it” and moved on with the day.Its 7PM and its time for cyno to meet with tighnari for one of their little meet and greets to congratulate collei and her first paycheck (230 mora!)}-Cyno was happy that collei got what she desired,and He had a good time their,Cyno didnt want to go home because he knew he would feel sick if he walked their and had the feeling that he needed to vomit,so,he asked tighnari if he could spend the night.of course,he said yes.Cyno washed up and got in bed with Tighnari.Tighnari was reading,until he saw cyno..he saw how he looked,hot..but in a manner of sickness..

He began to trembly ask “cyno?are you alright?”

Cyno felt sticky and replied huffing and puffing “huff..yeah..im..im ok..just a small cold..”

Tighnari felt bad the moment he said a “cold”

Well,your not coughing,or sniffing,what hurts?”he asked politely,cyno opened his mouth just to swallow thickly and shut his eyes closed.Tighnari knew he was gonna vomit.He brought a bucket to cyno’s warm chunky thighs,he was hesitant and pushed away the bucket”im not gonna throw up” he said with a sickly voice.Tighnari frowned and continued to rub Cyno’s back.

“You dont look to great,what did you eat to make you feel this?”

Cyno started to speak “well..|hurk|..i..ate some of..kaveh’s-”

He stops just to let out a long hostile belch with a record of 6 seconds!tighnari was shocked and laughed as he told cyno to take his time~.Cyno finished telling tighnari what made him gassy and sick to his stomach.Tighnari was sad and placed his hand on cyno’s belly,”aww,it doesnt feel great at all”he said drooping his ears with a heart brokened manner.Cyno let out more burps as tighnari asked him question about his belly.Tighnari thought his burps were super painful to hear and quickly patted his back.cyno began to gag.Tighnari was so close to forcing the vomit up cyno’s throat when collei burst in the room to tell them what she brought with the mora,as cyno let out a painful loud moan as he began to cry due to the pain

collei was frightened and screamed “WHAT THE HELL ARE YALL DOING?!”

Tighnari twitched due to the loud noises and told collei to never curse in front of him whenever he is clearly focusing on something.collei apologizes and still asks what was happening.

Tighnari sighed as he said”Cyno has a stomach bug from Kaveh’s food..he’s gonna need some time”

Collei’s eyes lit up wth a surprising manner on her face,”oh!i remember kaveh’s chicken!it made me have diarrhea for DAYS:(“she said loudly,Cyno groans as he heard collei ruins the moment.

Tighnari wasnt pleased with her and told her to go to bed and forget about it.Collei went to her room to watch tv until she was tired.Cyno gagged for about 4 minutes,tighnari was getting sleepy,as he was trying to tell cyno something,a stream of vomit came flushing out his mouth again and again,Flowing like a jug of water upside down,it kept flushing out of his mouth,and surprisingly,it already filled halfway of the bucket,he stopped to breathe as he wheezed for air,Tighnari was super shocked just to see cyno vomit practically water!he turned to him and said”are you ok?and,how much water did you have today”

Cyno,still wheezing for air,said with a wet heavy voice..”about,4 jugs-”and lets out the fourth jug with gross stomach fluids.tighnari didnt know what to say after a gallon of water flushed out of cyno’s mouth.it was a yellowish pale color,and the smell was very unharming..in fact,it had no smell.

Cyno belched a few times and said he was done.

Tighnari rubbed cyno’s belly all night,helping him push belches up when he needed to.~

Headcannons by :gengenbelches~

#genshin cyno #genshin burp #genshin headcanons #genshin tighnari #genshin kaveh #genshin collei

[incarnateirony]

What's the thing about David Haydn-Jones? Is he going to have a role in TW? Does he know something about the show and leaked it? I'm searching some info about this but I can't find anything. Also, I can't find your post about Alma (personally, even if I'm a cockles truther, I don't believe Alma is Misha, but I'm curious about what you said)

I've never been on the Alma Is Misha train seriously either but I've followed it for fun and there was just a poem from someone else alma reposted about making your own world to not die in someone else's. It was just incredibly timely because yeah. That.

DHJ is on the list of actors that were called up a while ago and asked if they'd be interested for return. The general pitch is basically, well, there's like time travel and dimensions and stuff. Anyway, for some unearthly reason, Pat's been banging on this basic bullshit pretending it's super insane leaks verifying dramatic changes or some shit just because they did reshoots and he still doesn't fucking comprehend what those actually mean.

Hell I'm pretty sure even the note attached to my own draft left a lead in that quite literally said, "This is an example draft. Due to the placement, a variety of characters could fit in from time or dimension distortions, here's a shortlist of other suggestions." basically. Like this isn't the fucking rocket science he thinks it is. This man has no earthly comprehension what a good Treatment looks like so he’s been crapping his pants about “changes” that were already fucking prepared for as alternatives. You know who understands how to make good Treatments? The screenwriters and former showrunner (not of spn) in this fandom that are WAY above your paygrade dude.

The original project was 8-10 episodes miniseries with a few fractal potentials and presentations planned so no shit they're having to shift it around a little bit you fucking knobs. lmao you wanna know the real reason he kept saying 10 episodes at first, there you go. That's why he aimed for it in the commitment. SDKJFSDJFS gg pat since I know you still read my wall like a loser and by now 100% have had ghost or someone narc to you that I'm not fucking with you.

Anyway back to actual ask, basically, he's on the list of potential fan favorites being given opportunities to return. Exactly when and where is unclear. Especially since "when" is gonna be kinda multifaced in this.

Nothing actually meaningful leaked from DHJ is actually the point. Pat's been trying to act like he Knows Things because DHJ sharing vaguepitches and some tumblr anon fucking with him.

it’s not fucking rocket science. The show features the Men of Letters. What do you THINK he’s fucking there for. And do you think that entitles him to the full thing. seriously i’m. so done with pat’s 2 braincells farting garbage into the internet and labeling it Intel when they happen to rub together

mfers know for a god given fact I work with people who get onto CW shows and even have some damn good friend actors that started periscope streaming supernatural and yelling at me live for getting them into this hellhole, but he can’t wrap his fucking brain around the fact that maybe someone moved the bar on him while he wasn’t looking. Or his folks yelling U DONT KNOW BOBO BOBO DOESNT KNOW U AND WILL NEVER KNOW YOUR NAME and then shutting the fuck up when I drop them a video voicemail, “HIIIII MINNNNNN ITS BOBO~~~~ AT COMICON~~~~ WHY AREN’T YOU HERE?~~~~ HUH??~~~~” Fucking shit.

figure it out, douchebags.

same dumb motherfucker that’s spent years arguing with me that Corporate Things Aren’t Real Corporate Things Don’t Exist And Can’t Hurt him, constantly smashed in the face. Or arguing that Berens had no Destiel intent and actually shipped Wincest--he banged on that for YEARS not even knowing about what Bobo’s desk looked like or the entire motion of overwriting Bucklemming going on in the room with Dabb’s aid. Arguing certain shit doesn’t happen because he’s nobody while I’m like, sitting on an under the table recording of execs in burbank about another CW show but SURE FUCKING POP OFF DUDE. 

You were wrong about the original ending, and paid 5K to be wrong about the omissions, and you were wrong about the pilot, but I’m very sure your magical anon that wasn’t there to save you from looking like an embarrassment then definitely has deep insights to production futures. You were wrong about Berens. Wrong about corporate. Wrong about who cut what lines to the point you were bitchslapped by actual direct sources in half a day. I have never seen a piece of shit be more consistently wrong and pretend he’s right. This is the biggest tryhard piece of shit I have EVER encountered. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

and damn I mean, I know people in this fandom overbloat their importance, or even low key media workers do. Mary Manchin argued about the goddamn market testing and said they don’t even do general SPN market testing when I had the goddamn receipts in my phone for years before we safely pushed it through debunker. Natalie Fisher took great confidence in her RL friendship with meredith to the point she argued with me in season 15 there was no confession scene. Jess from the Mary Sue, too. Like you people do not fucking understand how stupid this all looks. And patrick generally can’t even get at THAT level of fucking sources.

Genuinely funny they can’t figure out why I’ve been comfortable owning association with that market testing without fear WB will come after me to shake me down for whoever gave it to me. You haven’t thought that far yet, I guess. Probably because you never even comprehend this world turning around you, to think of that as a flag you should probably be pissing yourself about right now.

#apollo's curveballs #2p0 is a buffoon

[jennyyyeeettt]

stuff i learned more on the internet than irl

get a drink

you are unique, you are a part of the universe.

don't change, unless it's for the better and it makes you feel good

real friends care about you

what you need is more important than what you want

you write your own story, don't let others decide for you

there's no shame in being who you truely are, whoever doesn't respect that doesn't deserve your time

be proud of the little things you did bec. 5% is better than 0%

nothing lasts forever, so choose to "seize the day"//carpe diem boys//

if you are not where you are try to get there with plans and imaginatioins

imagine ur best self and show up as them

nothing is wrong with you, you are loved. bec there are many people in the world u didn't meet. and there's no way you are not someone's type

you are not ugly, u r just bored of ur face bec u see it everyday since you've been born and u hearedthe comments on it

stay nice or quiet, everyone has their battles

no mattar how much u think you are fucked up rn, months later things will change and u will forget about it

grief doesnt go away with time, time just teaches us to "deal with it"

just bec it doesn't hurt anyone, doesn't mean it's ok

karma is real, she just takes time and sometimes works secretly

romantic love isn't more important than platonic love

just bec someone is doing it, does't mean you HAVE to

if the story doesn't fit you, change something about it

being "private" is not the same as being "secretive" in relationships

before jumping to conclusions, ask and discuss, -with a good, none threatening tone-

love changes a person, even if it's not quickly

not being productive doesn't mean being worthless

being in a slump is not being lazy

everyone is an addict to something

treat yourself like you would a child every now and then and be a better parent to yourself

you are gorgeous anyways, so don't care what others say

if you fail, try again! it does't define you, it's not a part of u, it's like a game.. when a game says "game over" you just reply it

labels are so overrated, don't stress about it.. u do u

distance is a bitch, unless its distancing from toxic ppl and behaviours

love is not selfish love is understanding and comprimizing

saying i love you is not dangerous when its used with the right people

words of affermation ACTUALLY IS IMPORTANT

a "hopeless case" is never "hopeless"

the person they called "useless", made someone's day and helped them through a tough life

life is short, take risks, tell the people that you love how much they mean to you. no time for being fake.

idk if i already said that but fake it till u make it fr fr bro

push yourself bec no one else will, but also be kind to yourself -very difficult balance- IF you read all that, i hope you at least saw a thing that was helpful, I learned them literally from the internet (friends and communities and all) and I've been doing that for the past 2 years and they work with me, i didnt realize them at first but being a bit of a self critic i realized these stuff, even people now started to point it out. me and one of my fav internet bsff realized how we changed over the years and talking to their mom she also noticed it and its just so great to see how we both affected eachother and encouraged eachother to be better ... nothing is better than to find a home in yourslef .. doesnt mean it doesnt get tough sometimes, doesnt mean that i dont struggle with anything, but we are all humans, overall all we do is change and grow and its either to the best or not, it gets hard, but good relationships fixes the broken parts over time .. im so grateful for my family aka my internet besties :3 its 5 30 am and i need to sleep .. got a bit emotional lol :') hope yall have a good day/night take care

#real life #life lessons #speaking from experience #i love tumblr #i love you #long distance #love #internet best friend #internet addiction #internet

[violentviolette]

Hey, I really appreciate your blog. Doing god's work with your advice haha

Do you have any advice on how to deal with not having supply? I feel like I'm going crazy

lmfaooo thank u anon i try honestly the best thing is going to be to use this as an opportunity to get used to validating urself and not relying on supply supply is shallow, unreliable, and it doesnt actually last. its a hollow false sense of validation that doesnt actually get to the root of our need, which is connection what we're seeking out when we seek out supply is the human need for connection. we want to be seen, heard, and feel valued and like other people care about our existence. supply is a quick hit of that, but its not real and so it doesnt last and isnt sustainable looking up resources on how to self validate will be really helpful, the first steps are usually externalizing the process and spelling it out for ur brain. things like "i feel really lonely or uncared for right now, thats a normal human emotion, everyone needs to feel like they're valued. the healthy way to soothe those feelings is to seek out positive connections with others. if i dont have those i should work on building them. what should that look like? do i need more close friends? do i need a wider support network? is there a hobby i can take up where i can feel proud of myself for acomplishing something without someone elses involvement?" and in the meantime, work on being that positive connection for urself. when someone else isnt around to tell u uve done a good job or are valuable, u are around. learn to become ur own support network, get used to saying positive things about urself and grounding urself in reality. things like "my friends are busy right now and cant give me attention, thats okay, they are living their lives and they will be around later, in the meantime IM here for me and i will always be able to make time for myself. i did a good job and im proud of myself for handling this well" for a lot of people, things like re-parenting urself and viewing urself as a seperate person who u are caring for can help a lot. I wasnt given the love and attention and validation i deserved as a child, my parents dropped the ball and fucked up, but i can fix it. i can be there for myself now as an adult, how did i wish my parents had treated me during my times of need? i can treat myself like that now in order to help heal those hurts and that neglect. i can be there for myself and learn to love myself the way i deserved to be loved and remember that most importantly, what u need right now is comfort and compassion, so give that to urself. be kind to urself, take a long bath or have a little treat, light some candles and watch a movie, do things for urself that will make u feel special and cared for, because u can! u have that power. u have the ability to be what u need and be there for urself, so take that opportunity and let urself feel loved

#jack.speaks #anon #npd #cluster b pd #npd tag #self validation #i hope some of that is helpful sorry it was a lot im not good at being concise lmfaoooo

[madasrabbits]

hey kc do u have advice about being embarrassed about my writing? i have like five published pieces but im having major imposter syndrome and feeling like all my stuff is so horrible that i don't even deserve to be considered a writer. im so deeply embarrassed of what i write and feel like i should just give up. this is seriously taking a toll on me mentally and i think its also what's preventing me from writing recently. anyways i love ur work and am just hoping u have some insight. thank you!

YESS i absolutely do have advice. im sure ive mentioned on here before that i used to be steadfast sure id never publish anything for numerous reasons, but one especially being my fear of being average and talentless.

first of all, anyone can be a writer. you dont have to be good at writing to be a writer. at all. you literally just have to write and you’re a writer. i urge you to & hope you can realize your talent or success is not what gives you permission to create. if you swim, you’re a swimmer. if you sing, you’re a singer. if you write, you’re a writer. it’s not the talent that gives the act meaning, its the act itself. you are a writer, and a good one at that, because you create.

one thing i have to tell you is that no matter how much you write & how good you are of a writer, you’re gonna make stuff that isnt that great. youre gonna make stuff that sucks. and thats okay, because those ideas have to go somewhere, and getting them down allows you to move past and create Good Stuff. writing “bad” stuff doesnt make you a good writer, it makes you a healthy creative with a healthy creative process.

but i understand being embarrassed about what you write. i think a lot of times we do write stuff that can feel embarrassing either in topic or execution. like in my case — recently i had a nonstarter crush that hurt my feelings really bad and for a few weeks (probably more) most of the stuff i was writing was just… not good. even if i liked the craft of a sentence, it felt embarrassing and clunky and awkward. it made me feel deeply untalented and Stuck. while writing helps me emotionally process, sometimes you need to recognize that you need to step back from that and find other ways to get out feelings and move through moments of creative or emotional block. i took a while without really writing as much and i worked on editing old stuff and polishing stuff im proud of as a personal reminder that you can do that & you will do that again. i also learned to do other things (skating has helped me with that immensely.)

it also helps to just put it down. you dont need to force yourself to write. i think of it as like a muscle and if if you are using a strained and exhausted muscle, you’re more likely to damage it and then have even a harder time getting back to it. id recommend taking a break or at least putting less pressure on yourself to create. you can work on stream of conciousness writing to continue evolving a practice but then work on not taking that writing as something to be good. sometimes it just helps to sit down and put down Whatever. it sort of helps “unclog” your brain, in my opinion.

in terms of embarrassment ive also worked through a great deal of self criticism (i still do), and it helps me personally to try and investigate those thoughts. i can usually catch myself in the negative thought (im making bad art/this sounds stupid/im talentless/fill in the blank) and then find ways to counteract it. it helps me to remind myself you have to make bad art to make good art, im not put on this earth to create stuff to satisfy anyone else but me, etc. you have to investigate the negative thought at the source and find ways to counteract it by disproving that logic (at least thats how it works for me.) it might also help to talk about the negativity with a friend or someone else (ive even used my therapist to break through some of those thoughts, but i know not everyone is helped by therapy or doesnt have access to it.) in general, i think the most important thing is finding the root of a thought and then working to curb or work around it — and it takes patience and time. its hard. but you’ll get past it. i promise.

altogether, i think id recommend being gentler with yourself. patience is the hallmark of creating art and your mind is a very gentle machine that needs care and time. allow yourself to rest & do things that bring your brain calm and new inspiration. i always seek out new music when im feeling blocked or i go for a walk/skate/drive/etc. but its not a bad thing to put it down, to take a break. ive gone months and months without writing literally anything, and there’s nothing inherently bad about that. you might be cyclical like me, or perhaps you need rest and to find your starting point again. perhaps focus less on publishing for a while and work on creating stuff that satisfies you, or maybe find other ways to be creative that isnt writing. its easy to get caught up in our own fears, but you’ll get past this. just have patience and do what feels best for you & what brings you creative fulfillment, even if that means taking a break. allow yourself to create bad art, too.

i hope this helps. i wish you the best.

#asks #sorry this got so long #if you need clarification or have further questions im happy to answer that too— i tried to offer some approaches to various angles of your #feelings but what it really comes down to is you feeling out whats best for you.

[aquagustd]

i just want to say that i had a relationship similar to hie jk and oc. we fought so badly and said the worst things to each other but we always came back because it was what we were used to. its all about the forgiveness. being comfortable with the dysfunction is common unfortunately.

this story is very realistic in my eyes because to me they seem like theyre all so in deep with each other like on a soul level that regardless of how toxic it can be, one person is not necessarily more evil than the other. in other words, everyone thinks theyre justified. both jk and oc were young in love and that sticks so much to a person. im talking literally for ur whole life. feelings u cant help, merely because of the memories you shared and what you end up building together. jk is a broken person and so is she. not to mention now they have a kid! they literally cant get rid of each other for good unless they fight to the death. they also cant get past their old selves. hopefully they overcome that with compromise and work. depends on who wants to fully commit to that 🤷🏻‍♀️

finding love through trauma bonding is real!although not the healthiest, it is unpredictable and intense and passionate. i truly think that oc is not a fool she is just human. people forget how easy it can be to fall right back into a cycle of hurt if no one decides to change. their dynamic is different because they HAVE changed in some ways. maybe not completely but its progressing and it seems like the spark will always be there between jk and oc. they both obviously care at least an ounce about each other. just the subtle yearning is significant.

you can also love two people at the same time just in different ways. who you decide to build your relationship with doesnt mean u stop all feelings for someone else. with time love will be tested and all that matters is who will make who the happiest!! not excusing any of the horrible behavior, but everyone shows their ugliest sides when they dont know what they want from life. its just what it is. good news tho, i think almost all of the characters are fed up with the dysfunction and want peace. junho is a blessing because it takes everyones minds of themselves, and they selflessly think about that child. other than sora (lol) i truly believe that junho has both his parents and their friends rooting for him and want to step up to the plate so that can have a better life than any of them. junho comes first!!!

idk i like to think im an empath of some sort. well done on the update, cant wait to see how the rest of it develops. :) i love both ships tbh

-🐇anon💗

ahh bb literally everything you said 🥹 i teared up a bit ngl. the part where you said everyone has junho to try & take their minds of the dysfunction is so true 😭 not just oc & jk but also yoongi :(

whatever you said about jk & oc is true too !! no matter what, no matter how shitty the other person acts you just can’t help your feelings. especially when they were once a good person. you’re constantly thinking that the old them is still somewhere in there & that’s kind of how oc feels too. (even though she won’t say it)

i’m so happy you’re seeing hie for what it is !! & i’m so sorry to hear about your past relationship 🥺 i hope you’re doing better bun <3 and tysm for reading and always being so sweet !! ♡

#fic: hie #squishies #🐇 anon

[wooahaes]

(why does it have me so soft that you thought of me fhhjfh i'm easily moved lol but i rlly like talking to you) thank you sm<3 i'm doing better! I'm struggeling a bit with my health rn but I also have a big ass essay to write and it's just A Lot but I'm sure I'll manage!! I'll just speak it into existence lol

hgjfhgj omg that fight thing is so cute but I can picture it so well for them T-T also on the topic of dino - because of his nickname i always have to think of him when i see adorable otter content now. Like, I'll be seeing stuff like this and my brain goes :( dino :(

"pick a god and pray" is probably the best one ever across any of the games honestly. I also love Jakobs crit lines in fate he's so sassy "time to take out the trash" "you are excused" "you're about to be served" - what a legend IKR like. claude?? please be a little more subtle about your thirsting

okay but catching cheol feelings over writing UtS is absolutely valid. as someone who is cheol biased lemme just say the way you write him in UtS? perfection. i have way too many feels for this man and your writing makes me love him even more T-T

saame i love that petty drama queen. oh god seungkwan would have the best quotes in battle fdjhfjs

I'm so sorry about your fucked up sleeping schedule but I'm glad you at least found a way to deal with the pain >_<

good thing you're a little better over all<3

aaaa i get the same way tbh!! ppl dont rly think of me often i dont think but when they do it means a lot and im always emotional as a result <3

i'm glad you're doing better!! i hope ur health struggles aren't too bad and that u do well on ur essay!! that reminds me i have a discussion board post i need to do but i have time lol im fine w doing it a lil late

(link is safe for anyone who wants to click on it <3)

stop thts so cute omg <3 i would like to also share tht chan always holds hands w reader when he sleeps bc he just likes being connected to them in some way (and usually someone else wants to cuddle too so he'll at least hold hands w them bc cuddling is nice. which isnt to say chan doesn't have times where he just wants to keep reader to himself--he just doesnt want to be possessive and keep them from cuddling w the others if they want) and i imagine it's probably jeonghan who looks at them and he's like wow... just like otters since they hold hands when they sleep to keep from drifting ykno. honestly he probably holds hands w anyone but esp reader lol

LITERALLY its such a powerful line i love quoting it casually lol also im not a huge fan of jakob as a unit but his crit lines are always great. i appreciate the ones that are just like "bye <3" too tbh sfkhsd

writing cheol in UtS just really makes me appreciate him more as a person too tbh like. hes SUCH a good leader in general??? and i just kinda hope to do him justice with the way i write him and according to a lot of ppl im doing well there? i just love and appreciate him a lot even if he's not in my top three members of svt <3 like i said... 3 biases, 10 bias wreckers at all times.

haha fun fact actually: cheol is one of the characters who always loves reader despite whos part ur reading. it's always a matter of him putting their happiness first even if it kinda hurts tbh haha what who said that

oh absolutely <3 i think minghao would have some pretty solid battle quotes as well.

its ok!! literally today is the earliest i've gotten up in the past week-ish so maybe i can start fixing my sleep schedule lol

thank u layton anon ily i hope u get to take it easy and rest soon <3

#layton anon #wooahaes.ask

[deathmcth-archived]

☢ 𝘒𝘕𝘖𝘞𝘐𝘕𝘎  𝘠𝘖𝘜𝘙  𝘗𝘈𝘙𝘛𝘕𝘌𝘙  𝘞𝘌𝘓𝘓  𝘊𝘈𝘕  𝘗𝘖𝘛𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘐𝘈𝘓𝘓𝘠  𝘔𝘈𝘒𝘌  𝘞𝘙𝘐𝘛𝘐𝘕𝘎  𝘛𝘖𝘎𝘌𝘛𝘏𝘌𝘙  𝘈  𝘓𝘖𝘛  𝘌𝘈𝘚𝘐𝘌𝘙.

REPOST DO NOT REBLOG !!

& DASHBOARD FUN ; mun addition ✧˖*°࿐

●  name ; cloves is fine!

●  pronouns ;  he/him and they/them!! either of those or switching between the two is 👍🏼

●  preference of communication ; DMs are ok! i only give out discord to ppl i’ve been rping with for a good while tho 😔 i’m not SUPER talkative but i try to reply to everything as best as i can!

● names of muse(s) ; ayalon!! i also.. have a canon character mutli-muse blog that i haven’t really done anything with.. maybe i’ll finally do something with it

● experience / how long ( months / years? ) ; i’ve been rping since i was 13, but for tumblr rp specifically i started in 2015!! and then took a much needed break from 2017-2019. i’ve always loved rping but the rp community back then was uhhhhh not as supportive of trans ppl or characters. it seems to have gotten better tho

● best experience ; i think anything i’ve done with my friend @carnivorarium // @phantasmaw!! i can’t really pinpoint a specific experience, but plotting and rping with them has been really fun and has really helped me get back into rping as a whole. IDK i was just so nervous when i first came back but she was super cool and nice and our characters hit it off super well!! 

this isn’t a tumblr rp experience but back in 2015 me and a friend created this huge fantasy world with all kinds of characters and we had the whole rp plotted out till the very end. i cant remember much of what we established but i remember it being really in-depth and thought out LSJHGKF i was always so excited whenever we both found the time to sit down and toss replies back and forth to each other. but then a few months later the website we rped on didn’t exist anymore and we ended up losing contact. i really wish i could go back and read everything we sent each other but im pretty sure i cant 

● RP PET PEEVES / DEALBREAKERS ; 

i actually have a lot and that’s why im so selective LDJFHK like the tumblr rpc has gotten better, yeah, but there is still so much room for improvement. 

1. being needlessly mean/high school bully level pettiness. Like bro there’s certain ppl on this website that do nothing but frequently make these long ass posts complaining abt how their oc(s) are better than everyone else’s, bc everyone else’s aren’t as “thought out, original, interesting, ect enough” and like? i just dont get it. i genuinely do not understand why ppl are so willing to kiss these specific kinds of ppl’s asses. the MOMENT i see any kind of “my oc is better than other ocs and here is a list as to why:” i refuse to interact. be proud of ur characters, but dont act like ur better than everyone else? i’ve also seen someone make a #girlboss post abt how “yeah there’s certain ppl on this website that want to avoid me so i go out of my way to befriend all of THEIR friends so they can never get rid of me :)” yeah ur weird. u are full on weird. u have not matured past 14. 

2. any complaining abt mlm and wlw. this includes ‘gay ships are so popular online that m/f just doesnt exist anymore.’/’everyone just wants to have gay ships so i’m going to get back at them by only shipping m/f.’ i dont think i should even have to explain why complaining abt gay ppl finally being able to indulge in fictional gay relationships is a fucked up thing to do and yet ppl still do it. stop having this ‘i have to get back at gay ppl’ mindset.. it’s gross

3. when i say no to a romantic and/or sexual relationship and all interest from the other person is lost. im not hurt when this happens, but it gets so annoying. if i say no to a ship and all interactions are suddenly cut off, it is so obvious to what ur intentions were and i really don’t appreciate it. my characters aren’t shipping fodder for yours. i know it can suck when someone says no to a possible ship, but it’s also so shitty to take that ‘no’ and then deliberately ignore the person just bc they refused u. it’s obvious, and i do notice it.

4. this is a personal preference ig but i dont like the ongoing trend of ‘my trans character was SA’d for being trans’ that is suddenly so.. popular within the tumblr rpc. it really grosses me out and i cant stand seeing it and i dont want mentions of that on my dash at all. it’s a no-no for me. 

● MUSE PREFERENCES ; fluff, angst or smut ; all three! tho i’m kinda selective with angst and even more-so with smut. i like to get a feel for someone and their character first before i rp angst, bc there’s been a lot of times i’ll be rping with someone and they would pile angst after angst on top of their character over and over again to the point it just got.. kinda ridiculous. like i love angst but sometimes ppl just get too caught up with making their characters go through the most fucked up shit as much as possible as a plot device. listen i love dragging my characters through the mud too but after awhile it gets repetitive and boring ;;v;; 

i love writing smut but given that ayalon rarely feels sexual attraction to other ppl and when he DOES he’s too busy just bullying them so. smut writing here might not be that big of a thing LKJDHFK fluff is a free for all tho!! he wants to knead on everyone like a cat and pull on them like laffy taffy. that’s ayalon being soft. 

 ● ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S) ;  i think everyone’s got a little piece of themselves in their muses!! it’s hard not to. but damn i WISH i was a giant goth dude with great hair. i guess the biggest thing we have in common is that we’re both pretty stubborn when we have our minds set on something

tagged by: no one in particular LJDKFG i just saw a lot of ppl do it 

tagging: do what i did and steal from me. it’s ok to tag me too <3

#( .MEMES. ) 𝔑𝔬 𝔡𝔦𝔯𝔢𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔟𝔲𝔱 𝔞 𝔣𝔞𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔦𝔫 𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔡𝔢𝔠𝔦𝔰𝔦𝔬𝔫 .⊱ #yes i AM a bit of a hardass .. go men acai 😔 #'we're both stubborn when we have our mind set on something' can u guess my rising sign LKJHDK #time to eat something and then.. back to drafts 💪🏼

[ireallydontunderstandpeopleatall]

New York

I woke up today and I was ok

Its sunday and I didnt want to get out of bed so i turned on the tv to put myself back to sleep

but then saw a movie, A rainy day in NY and thought of you and your NY

so i thought i'd watch it to see the scenes of NY that you see and maybe i will feel closer to you

forgetting that it also rained here today

somehow the movie is about a NY guy and a AZ girl, and I am an AZ girl and you and NY guy. why do things work this way.

that the morning i am thinking of you, to put on a movie about your city and the characters are from our regions, makes me want to believe its a sign for us but i know it's not.

no movie or coincidence can change how you see me.

2 weeks ago from tomorrow we started talking

i fell in love with you in about 3 days, yes I know it's a toxic attachment but I dont care, you are just so sweet

you stole my heart like D did and you broke it like D did but I dont want to forget you

you talked to me during a time that my world was so grey after richard.

it was such good company i did not know i missed.

and i guess i accepted it even if it hurts because it takes away the fact that richard is not the last person i had serious feelings for.

and lets me know i can still have these feelings and fall for someone so hard still even after I told myself i had sworn off relationships

you revived something in me i thought i no longer had

you flirted with me and got me to like you and when i started liking you then you told me you were already involved w someone else

at first it hurt and it was disppointing and i felt like i screwed it up for myself again by showing interest too easily and too quickly, and i might be right. maybe i ended the chase for you and i know some people need that for the passion

and i'm sorry but when you messaged me i had to fast reply bc i didnt want you to think i was not interested and i also did not want u to have to wait.

but maybe that is my downfall, caring too much as usual.

even after many heartbreaks i still have not learned my lesson and was so quick to give in to you but you made it feel so good and at my age i am shocked you could still make me feel this way. so in a sense you made me feel young again

but it doesnt matter bc you do not like me like you made me think you like me

but i still like you, we have history, I want to always be your friend and hopefully be some part of your life, even if small

when you told me about her i thought you would leave but you didnt, but then i tried to leave and you told me you didnt want me to disappear bc you didnt disappear on me and you're right

in a way you fought for me and idk why, i want to think theres a part of you that wants me, but if you do, you probably dont want me the same way i want you.

i write this bc i am ok now

before i was not

in the first week i was emotional and confused

over the first weekend i was disappointed by the low amount of contact

by the 2nd week i became accepting

now in the 2nd weekend i am almost back to the state i was before you took me.

except now i am calm and at peace and accepting but with fragments of you

i still crave you but i know very well what this is, it's out of my control and in your hands and i can only set boundaries and set limits and distance myself when i need balancing.

i dont think we will ever be anything

but in my coming down stages i asked myself if i really want to experience you and you experience me

all of my relationships have ended badly and with very bad words and criticisms exchanged, do i really want to learn to hate you like i hate them

we played trials together 8 years ago and were part of the same clan. if we ruin our friendship then it's like all those memories go to waste or disappear

you grew up to be such a smart and aware young man that even i couldnt even resist

my idea of you for many years was the young boy that was chasing the wrong girl that he talked to me about back then and years later was still hung up over her

when i thought of obssessive people for the wrong people, you were one of them that was used as an example

but when we reconnected and the stories you shared it was like we had seen the same struggles, heartbreak, realization and healing and i made myself believe that you were right for me, that you were who i have been looking for and who would finally come to sweep me and make me whole.

as much as you leave me wanting you, craving you and being curious about you, i know my wanting for you is about me and my need to attach. you just turned on that switch for me and it was exhilarating i have no regrets

like the song in the story of kunning palace,

"my heart is broken but i do not regret loving you"

and also

"traveled so far but i still can't forget you"

I just want to run to NY and stand in times square and hope to find your face among millions and dream that when you see me that something will awaken in you that will make you say "shes the one i want" but i know this is my dream

but i no longer expect anything from you, to expect from you would only be torture for me when they go unsatisfied like seeing you online but you dont invite me to play and i'm just waiting

but also richard waits for me to join him and i dont and he sees me online

so we all hurt and yearn for someone's attention in some way and this dating world is cruel.

but since you care about our friend ship it has made me feel better

i am happy you did not ghost me and have been honest with me

i can sleep again, i can be happy again in my world and it is no longer being pushed under the weight of passion, love, confusion, anticipation, longing and hoping.

i thank you for making the decision for us to not ruin our relationship

so today as i write this, i am ok.

#i still wish you were the one

[anoms-world]

im sorry you feel this way about me my free spirit has died over and over again because its trapped and cant see no options around its not that i dont have negative side its just bring back bad memories so i would block emotions completly its not bc of you as you think its just happened and i dont know how and im gratefull for that its gave me so many mental aptronaties

they tend to way too serous about lttle details not they fake emotions through playing feelinf and thinking and being silent they fake how they feel throug playong emotions and being lowd they way too short tp that they choose to pretend fake emotion most the time they patint so they choose to pplay fake feeling blindly most the time limitet eneregy leve;bc the fake emotion yet nn replay bitteness toward themself and others sometimes without realising high eneregy bc feeling doesnt requde energy yet their real feeling replay guilt toward themself and others sometimes without realiseng objective personal

they well never considirate aor sympathithy with you even if they did cause they will considare about what appeal to them and its about them self after all considerate in a silent way as a pleaser or considarete in loawd way as a teaser and it doesnt help each ather as they wish to believe

never ever tell them about what bother you they will use it againt you espicalyy if you are a mouse then you know what i mean you well run overe and over again try to please them all as pleasing your self to finally you are running from yourself seperated by their complete influence and not by an ego seems this is the price of not having an ego you become seperated and lost or afraid

i feel happy for doing what i want for the dirst time it feel nice to defens myself sometimes sense i dont do that alot wondering about the price the unknown price the things i doubt were true all this time

salt water before (morning) potasium protien food (egg or date)(no salt no kidding when breaking fast) nnnn fruit is the best for breaking prolonged fast or protien for normal fast

(AFTERNOOON) sugar first (if fruit) or protien or non/ white carbs coffee/sugar (thiamine in oat help metabolis carbs) nnn around early work out (fasting or not) with carbs with protien or sugar no fat mmmmm chromium grean tew cinamon two days seperately full fast capsaicin curcumin green te never mix carb and fat it increase dopamine addiction hyper fat unless u r active seems bit ok

(night) little salt fiber less carb and lastly fat food (salt caused acne for some reason) cacao spiking insulin ok here nnnnn work better with fasting work and heat more fiber to adapt fat potasium water while fasting

seeing alot of 1111 not sure the thoughts im receiving mine or not for some ppl asking for help is like asking for hell with way much attchn that make you regret beside your pain is completly ignored with their blind selfish noisy loud enerigitic storm oh asking for something else aaand doubled the storm lmao oh ask for something else and you will be insane and maybe you will be attacked with way much pleasure then they just wondering why after the attack loool its just like saying my foot hurt and they will step on it while ignoring the whole thing and maybe lough if they notice aaaand ignore again they really believe in themself huh looks like an active massive ego on the play to me yet too clever to comberhence i really wonder about my ego i have a weird shaked one that doesnt get me anywhere even if tryed yet feels good on rare ocatin and thats enuogh for me not greedy after all yet love to talk it through an emotional ego without natural act its just skrewed on so many level to be attacked even before to think about it almost like animals and noises if we dont considerate at all i wonder alot about the need to attack someone even when no one there or being obssesed about something and want to share when no one there why activies arent allowed here to feel better and become better verstion i wonder if being weak is better for some type of ego unless they running from their mental ego and think its ok to attack others with action they were extremly rude wen i was wek hurt my small hope that i send toward them

feel it let it go dont trust it when it confidant wispering and hungury talk to it what did you ecsept after that? everything doesnt matter right? you are scared why are you afraid of your own death and words? am i doing it wrong? am i weak? did i break time? are we all gonna die forgetting? i dont want to forget so thanks for reminding me you are the blind answer without question so you rushed blindly to question and im sorry for that for forgeting your matter its bc im weak and at the edge and there are not much to forget or to question beside being trapped irl therefor trapped mentelaty which chance do i have? when i need many chances not only one so if something tryied to shake the mentaly with nonsense no obbjective matter will only drive it insane like as if it was possesed its always have been a thoughts of broken passion of chained map to find if not somewhere all i ever needed were chances and silent part er that doesnt mention my weakness only every while as claiming to be helpfull somehow lmao at zero point we all back to be the based animal we were dont be mad and have fun lol disapper and good luck gues what they steped on you whole now and guess what you screamed cant take it anymore and they threatned you with more now nothing is protected and at peace as we like to think espically when you stuck with other pure animals spirits oh and commencation about what bother you doesnt make it any better WTF its almost like casting a quick spell on yea quick you dumb angry aand slow almost want to live in the roof if i can i just want to hide now from loudness beside dreaming about chances and silence cant find my rythem and natural routine anymore without being attacked by others having my sugar level high and losisng apitite a mouse after all a real mouse with little noises a language no one can understand.. seems its written to fight tho i hate it just to be in peace like just now being here being exist (i was lucky by uniq spirit oh that other spirit dousnt shut it at all) when nothing to lose as much they afraid to lose reputaion and hope aaand almost everything that why blocking everything was way much easier not for them sshh its just a matter of time for new order new born new run new play nothing change just new screams new dreams' ut funny she asked me if simething hurt yea my pride want to live alone to have some privacy or have permenat death 621

she hurt me everyday that i dont even recoginize when i am upset with her

some ppl just dont want any good for you or even considaret

and rather want to control you even when you weak

i lost my emotional innecent way too soon with them some ppl are way too imaginative about what they want its terrifying that send me to permenant dream state to save me from myself from the blind one

[appsa]

"The guy that kisses me the way you do. The guy that holds me the way you do. The guy who makes me laugh the way you make me laugh. That guy could never hurt me, you're that guy."

#IM GONNA DIE!!!!!! IM GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!! #YOURE NOT THE FIRST GOOD PERSON PERSON TO HURT SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!! THAT DOESNT MAKE U STOP BEING A GOOD PERSOBXKSNDKDJDCKEHEKDJ #IM GOING INSANE AGAIN #I FORGOT #I FORGOT HOW HARD ADAMS MONOLOGUE GOES #SORRY GUYS!!!!! I CANT DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!! #you caleb..... could never hurt me adam............. #bye lmao #i cannot deal byeee #shut it apsa #ok its not a monologue but akdjdk w/e #tbs

[ashthemadwriter-archived]

Hello there! Would you mind doing headcanons of Akutagawa becoming friends with a fem reader who’s sweet but sassy? She’s also very curious and loves being around different kinds of people. Think of Clara Oswald from Doctor Who basically. Feel free to do this if you want to. If so, thanks love! 🙏💕

Akutagawa with a Fem! Friend Whos sweet but a psycho

Fandom:Bungou Stray Dogs Pairings:Akutagawa X Fem!Reader Genre:Fluff,maybe?

Format:HeadCanons Warnings:None :D

A/n:OMG I got my first request! you made me really happy baby T^T to be honest i havent watched Doctor Who yet,but i did searched about Claras personality and find out a little bit about her i tried my best to give you what you wanted,really hope you like it :>

●Ok,since were talking about Akutagawa,we all know that its not easy to become close to him,let alone being his friend (especially because of your sassy personality) but its a little bit more possible if youre a part of the mafia

●personally i think you have the best personality as Akutagawas friend.he needs someone whos supportive,sweet,caring but also strong and hard on him when it comes to arguements and battles.(and selfcare ofc)

●at first he thought you were a two faced person and didnt really like you,but when he found out more about you and how youre kind and also stand up for yourself at the same time,he admired your strongness(did i say it right?)

●since you liked him very much,you tried to become close with him.you asked Mori to assign some missions for you two (do you want Higuchi to come or not?its up to u bae) and after some time when you asked him to come with you to a tea house,he did not refuse.

●Hes your superior btw XD,so when you talk back to him it makes him kinda pissed of LOL

●you better have a strong ability,or else you would absolutely die in the middle of your arguement

●he will definitaly use RASHOUMON to teach you a lesson and you know its hard to survive his attacks,so train well if you wanna be close to him (or just dont talk back to him)

●ok but imagine not using your abilities (or any weapons) while fighting(it was a small disagreement at first,but it turned into a big mess) hell grab and pull your hair and youll bite his arm really hard.both of you will be shouting and screaming.

●imagine Gin and Tachihara watching you fight as they eat popcorn and tell each other: Bruh this is a hell of a show

●Gin is cheering for you cause things arent exactly smooth between her and her brother,and it was fun to watch

●Higuchi had a panic attack and was really confused (she would usually attack the person whos trying to harm her senpai,but youre his friend,so she doesnt know what to do)

●imagine you and him throwing empty cups at each other

●Chuuya will beat the crap outta both of you because of the mess youve made

●LOL

●aside from fighting,he really epreacate your concern about him.he knows that you dont wanna hurt him or something,you just have a sharp tongue

●hes trying not to get mad at you,but he does

●you usually hang out at a small teahouse,but on speciall nights you buy some beers and drinks and go to his place(Gin will join you sometimes)

●he lets his gaurd of around you and is more open to you about his emotions towards stuff,and that makes Higuchi jealous sometimes;but deep down shes happy that her senpai has someone who can take care of him

●please,do not talk about dazai.thats his weakspot and youll really hurt him and thats not what a good friend would do

●sometimes you flirt with him and wanna mess with him a little bit,cause you love to see him blush and embarassed

●he wonders if something is wrong with your brain LOL

I feell like this is really stupid,but thats all ive got.sorry love :') -Ash

#bsd x reader #bsd headcanons #bsd aktugawa #x reader #dazai x reader #chuuya x reader #atsushi x reader #dazai osamu #nakahara chuuya #nakajima atsushi #bsd imagines #akutagawa x reader

[batgunz]

A/N- my first post hehe ヽ(≧∀≦)ﾉ i’ve recently started having an obsession with little nightmares and ninjago and it’s not okay help me

My favorite slashers taking care of a teen B]

Warnings: abandonment (i don’t get too much into the topic lol), crying (mentioned a couple of times?), that’s pretty much all haha

includes patrick bateman, leatherface/bubba sawyer, brahms heelshire, micheal myers

[literally do anything for this man…. ▄█▀█●]

patrick bateman

-this dude cares about himself and himself only, but he will do anything for you

-you’re old enough to stay home by yourself right?..RIGHT?

-take your child to work day is EVERYday ! (^o^)／

-you’re not talking or even getting close to paul allen. he despises him and he wants you to do the same

-limo rides on the weekends are the best 💅

-this dude is basically rich, so if you’re ever crying, get ready to go shopping!

- if you’re a masculine girl like me, he’s DEF gonna let you wear one of his suits ( only if it fits 💪)

[ i luv him like dhdjdhsjhs]

leatherface/bubba sawyer

-you were abandoned on the side of the road and no one was stopping for you

-*insert that one “uh you’re coming with me” tiktok sound*

- listen i know this dude probably doesn’t even know how to work a nokia, but let’s just say he HAD a phone

-bro you guys are going to be doing so many trends and saying stuff like “ you thought you ate”

- imagine bubba killing someone and you hyping him up like “slayyy !!😻”

- the family adores you (hopefully) and they obv treat you like family

-he won’t let them get to you and make u end up like him, he just won’t

-he cares about his child and wants them to be a strong healthy person💪💪💪💪💪💪💪

brahms heelshire

-okay i’m just bringing my childhood into this but just imagine this

-you guys are just laying on his bed and you’re on his chest, about to fall asleep, and he’s rubbing your back hubba bubbaaaaaaa

-anyways he does NOT know how to take care of a teen

-you’re practically taking care of him

-HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF

-if you’re crying, he’s crying bro😭

-though ur not really supposed to go outside, just think about having garden with dad brahms bro :[[[[

-ugh it hurts thinking about this (。·́︿·̀。)

-though he doesn’t know wtf to do, he’s trying his best and that’s all that matters

- also, COOKING WITH HIM WOUKD BE CHAOTIC BUT HELLA FUN

- putting cake mix on each other noses ☹️

-flour hand prints on each other WAH

micheal myers

-this dude also have no idea how to parent 💀

- i kind of see him as that kind of dad who would rather stay home with his kid than do literally anything else

-he leaves notes and reminders around the house (｡’▽’｡)♡

-probably makes u do chores tho😐

- i also see him as some kind of builder? like the ones to be really good at building things for their kid

- built u a treehouse so u can have a place to stay while he’s on his 10th kill streak of the night💀

-speaking of night, MOVIE NIGHTTT

- popcorn, candy, drinks, movies obv

-y’all are going to be up until 4am on a sugar rush, y’all be the keyword😭

uhhhhh yeah i guess that’s all 💪

#patrick bateman #patrick bateman x reader #american psycho #leatherface #leather face #bubba saywer x reader #bubba sawyer #texas chainsaw massacre #the boy 2016 #brahms heelshire headcanon #brahms heelshire x reader #brahms x reader #micheal myers #michael myers x reader

[nyashykyunnie]

Hello hello can I request first date and first kiss with xiao and diluc? both of them need sum love, especially xiao his angst potential is too much QwQ anyway thank you have a great day!!

A/N: Hi Hi Chirumiii!! Tysm for the request </3!! And I really agree with u that these bbs need more love hnnn!! I hope u enjoy this hc:D Have a great day too hnnn!!

𝕏𝕚𝕒𝕠, 𝔻𝕚𝕝𝕦𝕔 x 𝙶𝙽! ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣: Fɪʀsᴛ Dᴀᴛᴇ ᴀɴᴅ Kɪss

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕏𝕚𝕒𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .　﹢　 ° 　¸.    ° ˖ ･ ·̩　　 ｡　☆.     　﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .

I tell you, Xiao was very serious when it comes to this. Well, of course he is, this is for you after all. He doesn’t want your first date with him to be very...Disheartening.

The adeptus did his research thoroughly, he even went so far as to ask Verr Goldett for help.

She was very pleased seeing him like this, for once- He wasn’t thinking about his dark memories or his job. He was thinking of someone very dear to him, seeing him like this made her hear sigh in relief.

When she gave her suggestions, Xiao managed to come up with a good plan.

Xiao was very stiff in your date, appearing at some point nervous. His mind constantly trailed with thoughts like ‘Am I doing this right?’ ‘Are They Enjoying this?’ ‘Is this how mortals do it?’ ‘Am I missing on something?’

Give your boy a comforting pat in the back, it’ll really help him feel a little more assured. 

When you’re both walking, Xiao matches your pace. He’s not a beat slow or fast. He is with you and Xiao wants you to know that.

 Don’t expect him to be too into skinship, it seems...Too awkward for him and he’s afraid of exerting the wrong strength and might end up with you being hurt because of his carelessness.

However, if your eyes are very sharp- You’ll see him trying to reach for your hand but ends up retracting it and clenches his fist.

He wants to hold you, as close as you can possibly be- But the fear of just hurting you haunts him ceaselessly. 

But it’s alright, it doesn’t mean he wont hold you. He’ll eventually build up the confidence and he’ll softly take yours with his.  Xiao’s grip was firm, it’s obvious in his hold that he is someone who has fought numerous battles and wields his spear alone. Maybe his touch will feel a little sad no matter how loving and careful it is.

He wasn’t used to this, walking peacefully with someone beside him. It felt unreal.

Years of never-ending bloodbath, years of always being on high guard- It changed him drastically to the anguish he now suffers alone with.

Xiao was used to being able to not call someone his own, the walls around built up to the point he is trapped in the tight space of darkness of his own grief. Entangled by the karmic binds, forever cursed in the ways of always on the hunt- Xiao walks alone in a path he paved himself, nothing but suffering awaits him.

But when you came into his life? He felt like he wanted to lay down everything of him and just offer it all to you. His heart swore a silent oath to protect and love you in discreet ways.

Xiao takes you to Qingyun Peak and brings you further up the the floating island. He softly pushes your shoulders down to have you sit and he follows beside you.

“Wait a bit” He says, his amber eyes trailing off to the scenery ahead.

You look ahead to see the sky painted in amber and gold, the traces of the blue sky slowly disappearing as the sun takes it’s rest. Your eyes glistened, gsping at how stunning it was.

But Xiao’s eyes weren’t looking at where your gaze wanders, his orbs only looked towards you. 

To him, this sunset doesn’t compare to the beauty that is sitting beside right now. With you, the Golden Winged King didn’t feel like he lived in eons of slaughter. 

It was as if you broke down the walls around him and removed the binds that tortured him, you presence felt like it was the sun itself to him. Your ascension in his life gave him a new light.

You were his flame, without you, Xiao won’t have his light. Where you are, is his guide to peace.

“Xiao this is-” He cuts you off, immediately locking his lips with yours. 

His eyes carefully shut as he brings you in closer, softly circling around your waist and maybe pulling you to his lap. 

His lips were warm, it was soft and it nibbled on yours lovingly.

When he realized what he had done, Xiao immediately pulled out- his face burning to the point even his ears were pinkish.

“I-I” He fumbled in his words, not knowing what to say. “I-I! I!”

Xiao tripped, humiliation flooding him and now he wanted to bang his head somehwere. HE EVEN PULLED YOU TO HIS LAP, HOW DID HE JUST LOSE CONTROL NOW?!

“Xiao?”

“I-I...”

No doubt Xiao won’t be able to look at you straight in the eyes after his -ahem- fail in restraining himself

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝔻𝕚𝕝𝕦𝕔 ˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .　﹢　 ° 　¸.    ° ˖ ･ ·̩　　 ｡　☆.     　﹢　˖    　✦      ¸ .

Who would have thought that the Head Of The Ragnivndr, who tirelessly rejected the proposals of many wealthy nobles who offered their beautiful daughters- Would eventually fall for someone and ask them out on a date.

A date with Diluc will no doubt be very luxurious (Well duh, this man is a walking wallet). This man might even dress nice, probably in a suit. 

Diluc isn’t used to something like this so expect him to be a little awkward at some point. But he’ll make ways to make this outing for the both of you entertaining. No one wants a date that is just bland, right?

He’ll take you to the wonderful sight in Monstadt. But expect him to avoid going inside as much as he can, Diluc doesnt want to deal with his annoying step-brother after all. He wants to save himself from the Cryo user who will probably wont let him hear the end of it.

He want’s this date to be perfect, he made a lot of efforts for this after all. When was the last time he fully devoted himself to something that isn’t about work or his nightly Darknight Hero agendas?

Who knows, but he doesn’t care. All that matters now is that he will please you, the person who he is willing to give his all to. 

He was always blinded by work, he never batted an eye towards anything else. He wasn’t interested a tad bit in romance, he believed he didn’t need it. He just needs to do what he needs to do. No need for that.

But when you came? Boy did he want to open his own head and check how much water had gone in. Maybe he wanted to smack himself and say ‘So, love is insignificant?’

When he fell for you, his heart burned with to desire to be wanted. He wanted to get your attention. 

The peaceful walk with you felt unreal since he was too used to being in front of piled papers or a blade in hand to slice down. Something serene like this.... Just felt like omething that he’ll only experience inside a dream.

His crimson orbs will always wander to you. Looking at you makes him feel cozy and his heart roared out bbecause he just wants to protect you. 

If he’s confident enough, he’ll softly interlace his fingers with you. He’ll even rub his thumb at the back of yours to have you know that he’s there and he wont be leaving you anytime soon.

Well, in fact... Diluc doesn’t even want to leave you alone ever. He wants to keep you by his side if you also want to.

Moments like this, precious time spent like this, he’ll cherish it closely in his heart.

After all, this might be the last time he’ll get to experience something as soothing as this. 

“Close your eyes” He softly says and you obey him, Diluc then takes your hand and leads you softly.

His touch, full of adoration. He steps were slow and steady, he even has his hand at your back to catch you incase you trip. 

“You can open them now”

The moment your eyes opened, the night sky painted with stars took your breath away. The wind softly blew, brushing against your hair and your strands now softly flew against the breeze. 

Diluc smiled at how you bright your face was now, seeing you this radiant made him feel as if he had been granted a wish of a lifetime.

This is all he wants. He knows this moment will eventually fade into a distant memory that he will no longer be able to ever reach, but it doesn’t matter. He’ll hold this as close as it can. It will now become a piece of his heart.

“Did you enjoy?” He broke the silence between you both.

“Yeah!” You cheered, turning your face that glistened it delight towards him. “This is too stunning, I want to see this every night!”

“That won’t be too hard to grant, I’ll bring you here anyti-”

His words were cut off when you suddenly pounced on him, bringing your lips together.

Diluc frozen in his spot, his orbs blinking in utter disbelief on the sudden move you made. He gulped, unable to function but he eventually returned the affection you were giving him, his arms snaked around your waist, pulling it closer to his figure. 

His heart raced at the contact your lips made, he locked it in for a second before lovingly kissing you even deeper.

Under the moonlight, two souls have united. The wind blew a soft breeze, as if announcing the fuse of two who were made for eachother. 

A/N: Aiyaaa, I’m beat. I’m sleepy and tired, I still have homeworks to do tomorrow so I’m taking a rest now jasjsksg. Have a great day/night everyone! Hope you enjoy this headcanon! **IMMEDIATELY PASSES OUT AND SLEEPS**

#genshin impact #genshin comfort #genshin fluff #genshin headcanons #genshin scenarios #genshin x reader #genshin diluc #diluc x y/n #diluc x reader #diluc headcanons #diluc imagines #diluc scenarios #genshin xiao #genshin impact xiao #genshin xiao x reader #adeptus xiao #genshin x gender neutral reader