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#and it's wasn't some random party it was family celebration
hl-obsessed · 1 month
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Whatever you do don’t imagine Harry babysitting Olive and Lucky while the Tomlinsons go out for the twins birthday 🫠😫🥰
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Birthday Plans - Charles Leclerc
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<word count - 5161>
warnings - smut near the end, nothing too hardcore
The bright sunlight streaming through the curtains of yours and Charles' bedroom window disturbed Charles, and gently ushered him awake. He turned onto his side, expecting to see you lying beside him. Much to his disappointment, you weren't there.
"Baby?" he called out, but his voice was drowned out by the silence of your apartment. That was odd, he thought, since he hadn't noticed your departure. Normally, he would feel the temperature drop beside him and the bed would shift slightly, but he hadn't even realised.
Wanting to find you, he reluctantly pulled himself out of the warm and cozy confines of your bed, and padded through your apartment to find you. As he walked through the hall, he spotted random pieces of confetti sprinkled about the floor.
That was when it dawned on him. Checking his phone, he saw what day it was. 16/10/23. He couldn't believe that he'd actually forgotten that today was his birthday, and he realised exactly where you were. He also couldn't believe that you had let him forget.
For the past three years since you had been together, you had made his birthday the biggest deal of the year, without fail. Whether it be organising the biggest party he had ever been to, fully comprised of all of the people he loved and cared about on his yacht, to a quiet day in with his family.
This year, he had asked for nothing too over the top, since he just wanted to spend the day with his favourite person in the world. "My love?" he called out again, but he didn't expect a response. The double doors through to the kitchen were closed, which was odd, since you usually left them open.
Opening them, he was greeted with the loud pop of a confetti cannon, and a shower of red confetti. "Happy birthday baby!" You shouted as he walked through the door. Charles gazed around at the balloons stuck to the walls and lying on the floor, and plenty of birthday banners plastered about the room.
"Thank you, my love," he smiled, pulling you into a hug.
Turning out of the hug, you stepped over to the kitchen table, before skipping over to Charles and placing the party hat atop his ruffled locks. "Seriously?" he asked with a cocked brow. "Obviously, the birthday boy has to wear a party hat!" you playfully scoffed, putting one on too.
"Well thank you for all of the effort, sweetheart, I appreciate it," he told you, pulling you in for a kiss. Even if he was certain you enjoyed the thoughts of his birthday more then he did, it was always made a better celebration when you were planning it.
He wasn't looking forward to the fact that he was turning a year older, he was looking forward to the bright smile on your face when you got to show him whatever you had planned. Despite him telling you over and over that you didn't have to put so much effort into it, you always ignored his protests and did it anyway.
He always put effort into making things special for you, so you thought it was only fair that you did the same for him at any given opportunity - even if he didn't allow much room for someone other than you to be spoilt.
You just enjoyed the day that you got to celebrate him, since he was always celebrating you and you were able to make him priority for this one special day.
"Would you like to know what I have planned for today?" You asked, leaving your arms linked around his neck as his stayed on your waist. "Yes I would, I want to hear what you're going to do to try and outdo yourself," he told you.
"Well then you might be a bit disappointed, it's not very flashy" you winced, knowing this year's plan wouldn't be as extravagant as those of previous years. "I don't need it to be flashy, baby. You know we could do nothing and it'd be a great use of time spent," he said.
"So, I have invited Carlos, Arthur, Pierre and Kika over for some drinks and maybe some games, y'know, fun stuff," you explained, hoping he would like the sound of it. "Now that is my kind of night," he smiled, gently kissing your forehead. 
"I'm glad you think so,"
"Does anyone want another drink?" You asked, hopping out of your seat and looking around at the group of people sat around you. "Y/N, I can get them, you sit," Carlos offered, but you shook your head.
"I'm already up, but thanks," you dismissed, collecting empty glasses that wanted to be filled. Charles watched intently as you were running around, playing hostess. You were making sure everyone was well taken care of, and he could see you pacing around the kitchen, making sure everyone got the drink they wanted.
He was mesmerised by the way your dress clung to you in all of the perfect places and he was infatuated by the way you moved. You brought through the numerous different drinks that everyone wanted, and Charles noticed that you didn't have one when you sat down.
"Are you not having one, my love?" Charles leant in to ask while the others talked about something that you weren't quite listening to. "No, I've had two, so I'll stop there," you smiled, not wanting to get too drunk.
"Come on, have a bit of fun. It is my birthday, after all," he said, giving you those puppy eyes that were too damn irresistible. "Fine, I'll have one," you caved instantly as a triumphant grin spread on Charles' face. That was the grin that came out when he'd gotten his own way.
You went to stand, but a firm hand on your shoulder pushed you back down into your seat. "Sit, I've got it," he said, standing and disappearing into the kitchen. He was back shortly after, handing you a glass with some sort of clear, bubbling liquid inside of it.
"What is it?" You asked, sniffing it to try and discern what it could be, to no avail.
"Drink it and I'll tell you," he smirked. You took a sip, and you still couldn't quite tell what it was. It was slightly bitter, but the edge was taken off by a hint of sweetness, and it tasted faintly of some sort of berries. "That is very nice, whatever it is," you told him, drinking some more.
Suddenly, that triumphant grin appeared on his face again. "I knew I'd get you to like gin and tonic at some point," he chuckled, winking at you. 
"This isn't like the stuff you've been giving me," you scoffed, rolling your eyes at him.
"It's the one Arthur brought, it's in the kitchen if you want more," he smiled, taking your free hand in his and intertwining your fingers together. "Y/N, have you still got Twister?" Kika tipsily giggled. Her, Carlos and Arthur had been drinking slightly more than you, Charles and Pierre, so they were all rosy cheeked and giggling a lot.
"I sure do," you smiled, going over to the cabinet and producing the colourful box of the beloved game. Kika clapped, and Charles looked downright mortified. He was never a massive fan of the game, but he liked to see you have fun, so he allowed it.
"Ok, so we'll do the Leclercs' vs the rest of us,'' she said, and you were slightly confused.
"Four on two? How is that fair?" You asked with your eyebrows furrowed.
"You're technically a Leclerc, so you play with Charles and Arthur," she smiled, and Carlos and Pierre smirked at Charles. "You might as well be at this point," Charles muttered, smiling at you. Without anymore deliberation, Kika leapt up and set the plastic mat out on the floor.
"Charles, pick your challenger," she said, gesturing towards Pierre and Carlos, who were both reluctant to play - but it was all in good fun. "Carlos, you're one of the least flexible people I know, come on," Charles said, pushing himself off of his chair.
As the round went on, you span the spinner to see what Carlos would be doing next. "Carlos, left foot red," you laughed, looking at the tangled mess that he was in. His arms were crossed, and he somehow had to get his left foot under the entirety of his body to reach the red dot.
"It's not possible!" He complained as he tried to stretch his leg underneath him. As he groaned in discomfort, everyone was just laughing at him. Charles, who was also in a pretty compromising position was laughing too as Carlos' limbs collapsed beneath him and he clattered down to the floor with a thud.
"That was impossible," he huffed as he led on the mat on the floor as Charles stood and stretched his arms and legs out. "Good game, mate," Charles cockily grinned, offering a hand out to Carlos to help him up.
"Yeah, whatever," Carlos chuckled, hoisting himself up with Charles' help.
"So that is 1-0 to team Leclerc, Arthur and Pierre, you're up next," Kika smiled, straightening the mat out for the next round. Pierre and Arthur both groaned, reluctantly standing out of their chairs and standing beside the Twister mat.
Unfortunately for Team Leclerc, Pierre bested Arthur, leaving the game on your's and Kika's shoulders. "Y/N, you and me, let's go," she challenged, kicking her heels off to the side.
"Oh it's getting serious now," Pierre teased as he had to miss the flying heels that were coming in his direction. "I don't like to lose," she smirked, pointing at her boyfriend.
"Neither do I," you countered, leaving your heels beside Charles' chair as you stood to challenge Kika. "It's 1-1, let's see who can come out on top," Arthur said like he was presenting a football match or something. "Wait, so you're telling me we could have just let these two do it and our rounds didn't matter for anything?" Carlos asked.
"Yes," you nodded, and you watched the poor guy's face just drop.
"So I didn't even have to go through the pain and suffering that I went through?" he asked again, and everyone started giggling at him. "Sorry Carlos, the game is the game," Charles laughed, and Carlos looked dejected. "I am never hanging out with you guys again," he scoffed with feigned seriousness.
"Sure you aren't, Carlos," Arthur said, receiving a playful punch on the arm due to his comment. "OK, you two, OK, Y/N, right hand blue," Pierre instructed, flicking the spinner with his finger for Kika's turn.
You had your back to Charles, so you bent over to place your right hand on the blue circle. Your dress only barely covered your ass, and it took every ounce of self-control that he held in his being to not find an excuse to get you into any room in the house and have his way with you.
But, he had to remain a gentleman while your friends were there - even if he was going to find that incredibly hard. Especially when you looked as good as you did. He had to avert his eyes and look anywhere in the room but at you, but he was struggling immensely.
Thankfully for him, or not so much, his sinful thoughts were interrupted by Pierre giving you the instruction to put your left foot also on blue. He had dodged a bullet there, but Twister was most certainly going to send another huge one flying at him.
"Are you kidding me?" you exclaimed a few rounds later, as your left hand was supposed to go on the nearest yellow, which was underneath Kika's back. The problem with this was you were doing a crab over Kika, so you wouldn't be able to balance. "Just give it a go, you'll be fine," Carlos collared, loving seeing you two in a compromising position too.
By some miracle, you managed to balance yourself whilst still hovering over Kika. "So the next one is..." Pierre dragged out as he slowly spun the spinner.
"Pierre, hurry up!" Kika squawked, and you wanted him to hurry up too. Your muscles were aching as you held yourself in place. "OK, so, Kika, left foot green," he said, and all she had to do was stretch her leg out by one circle. "Y/N, right foot blue,"
"If I do this, I will flash you all, so look away," you tipsily laughed. Normally you wouldn't have done it, but there was alcohol running through your veins, so the logical and self-preserving part of your brain wasn't in full working order.
Arthur and Pierre averted their eyes, but Carlos looked for that second too long. "Carlos." Charles scolded as the Spaniard defensively held his hands up. He wasn't being disrespectful, he simply reacted too late.
Charles couldn't take his eyes off you, spread out all pretty for him as he uncomfortably shifted in his seat. His resolve was crumbling, and he was counting down the seconds until everyone left you alone. As soon as that door was closed, his hands were going to be all over you.
"Kika, left hand-" Pierre started, but her limbs too gave in under her. You breathed a sigh of relief as you were able to stand up, and your muscles were aching. "And team Leclerc win!" Arthur exclaimed, raising his arms in celebration.
"That was a tough one," you sighed, high-fiving Kika as she took a seat next to Pierre. There weren't any seats left, since Carlos had sat on the floor before Twister started. "Y/N, sit here, I can move," Arthur offered, noticing how there weren't any seats left.
"No, no, you sit down. I can sit on the floor," you dismissed, walking to Charles' side and attempting to sit down. "Absolutely not," Charles said, grabbing your wrist and tugging you onto his lap. You draped your legs over the side of the chair as your arms comfortably wrapped around his neck.
His hands found their perfect position on your waist as you leant your weight onto him. "My girl doesn't sit on the floor, especially not on my birthday," he whispered into your ear, his breath hot on your skin.
His words sent tingled up your spine, and you had to repress a shiver as you sat with him. "Can we do a round of this?" Kika piped up, snatching the Five Second Rule from the shelf beside her, and everyone audibly groaned.
"Just one round, please?" she asked, and you all caved in and thought it could be fun.
"Charles." You stated, tilting away from him as you looked at the car in your hand.
"Baby." he responded, intently looking at you as he waited for you to read him the prompt. "Name three vegetables!" you told him, turning the 5 second timer upside down as it made that strange noise. "Carrot, pea..." he fumbled, his brain short-circuiting as he couldn't think.
"Carrot!" he exclaimed as the timer ran out. For a second, everyone fell silent, and Charles looked utterly confused. "Carrot pea carrot? Name three vegetables and you say carrot pea carrot?"
"That's three vegetables, isn't it- Oh shit," he said as he realised what he had done. Everyone started chuckling, and you were just flabbergasted. "Carrot and carrot are the same vegetable, Charles. I know you don't cook very often, but I'm sure you have the ability to know that carrot and carrot are the same thing!" you ranted, and everyone was crying of laughter.
"Baby, there's no need to make it personal," Charles chuckled, trying to keep a straight face. "There are so many different vegetables in this world, and you name two of the most basic ones, and one of them twice. You adore pasta, and you have forgotten about the humble tomato. Maybe a pepper?" you carried on, and Carlos was practically rolling on the floor with laughter.
"I'm sorry, my love, I'm sorry," he laughed, kissing you on the cheek. You simply rolled your eyes at him as everyone calm down. "Carrot pea carrot my god," you muttered, and Charles chuckled at you.
As the six of you talked and sipped at the remnants of your drinks, you slowly shifted on Charles' lap to get more comfortable. "That is a dangerous game, baby," he said lowly in your ear. You couldn't help but shift a little more, as his hands braced on your waist to keep you still.
One of Charles' hands steadily moved along the inside of your thigh, his fingertips tracing the skin. He was getting dangerously close to you, as his fingers brushed over the thin lace that was the final barrier between him and you.
"Hey, later," you winked at him and you pushed his hand away. There was no chance you'd be able to keep yourself from being calm and inconspicuous if you let him do what he wanted to do. You wanted it, but you would never be able to live down the embarrassment if anyone caught you.
You all talked for another hour or so, and they all stood up to leave. You hugged everyone and waved them out of the door, and you were glad the night was such a success. You had enjoyed yourself, everyone else had enjoyed themselves, and -most importantly- Charles had enjoyed himself.
Once you had closed the door, you picked some glasses up off the tables and took them over to the sink to wash them. You couldn't be bothered to wash them now, so you just left them in the sink. You were putting away some of the bottles into the cupboards, and Charles appeared in the doorway.
For a moment, he just let himself watch you. He had behaved for the whole night, but now his resolve had fully crumbled and he rushed up to you. "Hey, you-" you started, but were abruptly cut off by him pressing his lips to yours as he lifted you onto the kitchen counter.
The marble was cold on the backs of your thighs, and it sent shivers through your body. "You have been driving me crazy all night, you know that?" he told you between kisses. You could taste the alcohol on his lips as his kisses became more aggressive, more desperate.
"I probably could have guessed that," you smirked against his lips, running your hands across his chest and over his shoulders. His hands slid up your thighs, pushing the skirt of your dress over your thighs and hips.
As your fingers fiddled with the buttons of his shirt, you saw the hunger in his eyes. The pure lust. "Just because it's your birthday, you can do whatever. You. Want," you whispered, and you knew you could have just gotten yourself into something dangerous. 
"Well then that makes this easier," he smirked, his lips ghosting across your neck and down your chest. "I have been wanting to do this for hours, but you just had to go and make things difficult for me, didn't you?" he playfully scolded, gently nipping at the skin on your shoulders.
The white fabric of his shirt was sent fluttering to the floor as you slid it off and over his shoulders. Your hands moved to his belt next, but he effortlessly tugged your wrist away. "Not yet, I want to see you squirm for me first," he said, slithering his hands up the sides of your thighs and to your hips, his fingers hooking into the flimsy slithers of lace that sat there.
He slipped the garment over your thighs and down your legs, discarding them to the floor just like his shirt. Charles looked at you with those big green eyes, keeping them locked on yours as he sunk to his knees in front of you. His eyes still trained on yours, he placed a hand on either knee and spread your legs as he slotted himself in between them.
"God have you been this wet for me all night? I would have sent everyone home earlier if I had known," he smirked, placing soft kisses up the insides of your thighs, nibbling on them every now and then. You shuffled closer to the edge of the counter, hoping he would take the subtle hint.
"So desperate for me, but I'm feeling nice. How could I make my gorgeous girl wait?" He teased, kissing dangerously close to you. You were desperate for it, he had gotten that completely right. You were positively throbbing for it. Without another word, he licked a thick stripe up your dripping folds.
You leant back against the kitchen cabinets, tangling your hands in his hair as he kept your legs split open with his hands. Every now and then, he would attach his lips around your sensitive bundle of nerve endings, just to keep you on edge. His tongue teased your entrance as you tugged on his hair even harder.
You pressed your hips into his face as he smirked against you. "If you wanted more, all you had to do was ask," he told you, sucking and nibbling on your clit as you moaned out in pleasure. It was like sparks of electricity pulsed through you every time he made the slightest movement on you, and it was becoming almost unbearable.
"Fuck, just like that," you mewled, running your hands through his hair again. He kept on licking and lapping at all of the right places, and you felt like a volcano was going to explode inside you. "Shit, baby, I'm-" you started, but you were cut off by him slowing his movements.
"You close, my love?" He mumbled, running his tongue over your clit again. You were so sensitive, moaning with every movement he made. "Mhm," you hummed, not able to form full words without moaning out. Charles knew you were close as he carried on teasing you with his tongue.
Just as you were about to come undone, he pulled his mouth away from you and kissed you on the lips. "You really thought I'd give it to you just like that? You made me wait, now you've gotta wait too, it's only fair," he mocked with a wicked grin plastered on his face.
"Baby," you whined, looking at him with those eyes that told him everything he needed to know. You needed it, and you needed it badly. But, he wanted to hear you say it. "Beg for it, baby. Tell me how much you want me. How much you need me," he instructed, sinking back down to his knees again.
He planted excruciating kisses on the insides of your thighs as he waited. "Please," you whispered, jolting your hips forward, desperate for the extra contact. "I can't hear you," he dismissed, nipping the soft skin of your inner thigh.
"Please, Charles," you groaned, louder this time.
"What are you saying 'please' for? What do you want?" He grinned, adoring the control he had over you right now. "Please, baby, I need to cum," you practically shouted, hoping it was enough for him.
"Oh you need it do you? Do you need me then, my darling?" He teased.
"I need you so bad right now, I'm aching for it baby," you grovelled, and that was like music to Charles' ears as he came closer and closer to you. "That was exactly what I needed to hear,'' he told you, diving straight back into you. His tongue circled your clit perfectly, and the extra pressure you had been so desperate for was being granted.
"Is this good, my love? Is this what you wanted?" He mocked, tasting the neediness on his tongue.
"Fuck, yes," you moaned, tipping your head back. Your breaths were short and shallow as you felt yourself crumbling. "I'm going to-" you began, but Charles pressed your clit that tad bit harder, and you felt a tingling wave of pleasure wash over you as you cried out for him.
He stood back up, aggressively kissing you as you could taste a mix of yourself and alcohol on his tongue. But, the taste of him was far more intoxicating than any alcoholic beverage could ever be. It ran through your veins and made you drunk on pure lust, and it felt better in every conceivable way.
As he kissed you, Charles thought over where he could take you. He didn't want to keep you on the counter, but your bedroom was far too far away for how much he needed you now. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted the empty dining room table, and it was the perfect option.
He held his hand on your bare ass as he carried you over to the table and sat you down on it. He slipped the remnants on your dress over your head, leaving you completely exposed to him as your nipples pricked up in the cold. "Fucking hell, you're so goddamn beautiful, baby,"
He stole yours lips with his before you could say a response, and he wasn't in the mood for waiting any longer. You could sense his neediness, slinking your hands down to his belt and unbuckled it. He didn't have any protests as he kept his hands on the sides of your face, holding him there as he kissed you.
You pushed his pants down to his knees, and he couldn't be bothered to kick them off - he didn't need to, anyway. Charles pushed your legs further apart with his knee and stepped impossibly closer to you. "You ready?" he asked, despite the fact that he already knew the answer.
"Yes," you breathed as he gently eased into you, and the feeling of him filling you up was like pure ecstacy. He gave you a second to get acclimatized to the stretch before slowly starting to rock his hips into yours.
The feeling of you wrapped around his cock was unlike anything, and it sent straight euphoria surging through his veins. He touch every inch of your insides as he moved, the tip of his dick hitting that one spot that nobody else seemed to be able to find with every thrust.
You didn't know where to put your hands, so caught up in what he was doing to you. You linked them around the back of his neck, nails digging into his flesh as you came closer and closer to release.
"How the fuck did I get so lucky?" he groaned, hands gripping onto your hips so hard you were certain they'd leave bruises there in the morning. But you didn't care. "My girl is the sweetest in the whole world, and her body is perfect in every single way. It's like you're made for me, baby," he rambled as he picked up his pace.
His head was spinning as he leant in and peppered random kisses all down your neck. He was addicted to the way you made him feel and the way he made you feel.
He could feel your legs start to shake, but your walls were already clenching around him. "You close again, baby?" he spat through gritted teeth, rutting his hips into you harder and harder. "Mhm," you hummed, not able to formulate full words. 
The feeling of you combined with the sweet sounds of you moaning for him sent him over the edge, and you dug your nails into the flesh of his shoulders as you came with him. As you both rode out your highs, letting the tingles slowly fade away, you clung onto him. 
The room fell silent, before Charles broke the quiet with a, "Thank you, my love. You're amazing, and not just at that, of course," he softly chuckled, holding you in his arms for a moment. 
"Happy birthday, baby," you smiled, leaning into his embrace as he tucked a lock of your hair behind your ear. "And this has been the happiest of birthdays for me. Yes, I love the yacht parties, but a quiet night in with my favourite people is all I need," he told you. 
You sleepily smiled at him, holding your eyes open as you looked at him. "Are you tired, my love?" he cooed, looking at your half open eyes. Your cheeks were flushed and your hair was all puffy, your lips red and puffy from how much he had kissed you. 
There were small red marks over your neck and shoulders from where he had gently nibbled at the skin as he gently ran his fingers over them. They were just small reminders of who you belonged to, even though there was no doubt in anyone's mind of who that was. 
"Yeah, but we can stay up. Whatever you want," you said, suppressing a yawn. 
"We can go to bed, I need birthday cuddles," he said, hoisting you up into his arms like a bride on her wedding day. "You get cuddles every night, what makes them different because it's your birthday?" you giggled, clinging onto him for dear life. But, you knew he would rather die than drop you. 
"I don't know, they just feel more special when it's on my birthday," he explained, dropping you down onto your bed. He threw a hoodie from his drawer at you, before slipping some sweatpants up his legs. 
Just as Charles hopped into bed beside you, you remembered something. "Shit, how could I forget?" you scolded yourself, scrambling out of bed and into the kitchen. 
"Baby? You alright?" Charles asked, wondering why you had disappeared so quickly. 
"Close your eyes!" you told him as you stood outside the door. Charles did as he was told as you walked into the room, trying not to drop what you were carrying. "Happy birthday to you," you started to sing as Charles opened his eyes. "Happy birthday to you," you continued as you perched on the bed beside him.
"Happy birthday dear Lord Perceval, happy birthday to you," you finished, completely off key. Charles saw the very poorly done Ferrari logo on the top of the cake, the prancing horse appearing to have three legs and his eye was very wonky. In the top corner, you had hand-piped a list of all the races he had won, as well as your favourite podiums of his. 
"Blow out the candles," you told him, moving the cake closer to him. The orange flames on the 2 and the 6 were extinguished as he blew them out, unable to wipe the goofy smile off his face. "When did you make this?" he smiled, taking the cake out of your hands.
"Yesterday when you were out with Arthur," you told him, glad he had noticed that you had made it. "I know it's a bit shit, but I tried,"
"I prefer this to the actual one any day of the week," he said, grabbing his phone and taking a picture of the cake. "It's perfect, thank you baby," he thanked, looking at the cake again. 
"Happy birthday, Charles," you said again, and you both hoped there would be many more to come. 
A/N - Tanti Auguri to the love of my life, and the guy who makes everyday that slight bit easier. Forza Ferrari, and Forza Charles Leclerc 💖
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cod-dump · 5 months
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ITS ME IM BACK TO GIVE YOU MORE TEEN GHOST
When Simon and Johnny FINALLY start dating Johnny’s dad invites them over for a bbq
Price and Johnny’s dad (I’ll give this man a name because I don’t want to keep calling him “Johnny’s dad” so I’ll just call him Noah)
So Price and Noah become friends and I mean really great friends but Nikolai doesn’t like this and thinks that Noah is trying to steal his man so he keeps giving death glares and Ava (Johnny’s mother) sees this and is like “absolutely fucking not” and so she confronts Nikolai and she’s like “you got a problem with my husband?” And she does NOT play and Nikolai isn’t going to let himself get disrespected by this 40 year old woman that’s 5’2 so he starts talking back and the it just turns into an argument
And price and Noah are the ones to break it up and Simon, Kyle, and even Farah are all hiding inside and are dying of embarrassment
Later Ava and Nikolai make up and then actually kinda become friends but they still hate each other a little so they’re frenemies
Johnny was also hiding inside with Simon but his sisters were outside cheering their mom on
(P.S at some point during the argument Ava started yelling at Nikolai in Gaelic and so Nikolai also started yelling but in Russian.)
-🫠

My names for Soap’s parents are Isaiah and Muriel but I like those!
___
A MacTavish Party (teen!Ghost au)
(warning: A lot of silliness ahead. I mean, I was really trying to see how silly I could get it. Just really trying)
(Also, random facts at the end to clarify somethings)
---
It was like the MacTavish family leapt into celebration when Simon and Johnny finally started dating.
Simon thought his dad sitting him down and giving him a more adult version of 'The Talk' was embarrassing, but Johnny's family was literally throwing a barbeque to celebrate. Johnny was on speaker phone with Simon and Kyle when his sisters had busted into his room and started singing a made-up song to congratulate Johnny on finally asking out his crush. 'Pussy No More' was the name they gave it.
It was the funniest thing Simon ever had the pleasure of hearing, and hearing Johnny die of embarrassment before hanging up so Simon and Kyle couldn't hear anymore just made it better. Clearly Johnny had the more embarrassing family and that made Simon feel at ease for some reason. Maybe because he didn't have to worry about his family doing something to make him want to bury himself alive.
The entire Price household was invited and Simon was told he could bring anyone else if he wanted. So, of course, Simon called Ale and asked him and Rudy to come along... and asked Alex to come (and totally not so he can watch him and Kyle squirm while in the presence of their father and Nik). Simon knew Johnny asked Hong-Jin and his sisters to have their boyfriends to be there so it wasn't like there weren't plenty going on to distract John from the clear weirdness between Alex and Kyle.
"I fucking hate you," Kyle muttered as they walked across the street to Johnny's house, Alex hanging way back behind everyone as if he was scared if he got too close that John would just know.
"Hate me all you want, doesn't change the fact that we're brothers and that you're stuck with me."
Kyle's glare hardens and Simon pretends he doesn't see it, John already at the door and ready to knock when it swung open and Johnny's family grabbed his arm and practically threw him inside. Simon saw Johnny further in the house, looking like he was arguing with his eldest sister, Eve.
"Come in, come in! Simon!"
Isaiah was a friendly man, but it felt like that friendliness increased tenfold the moment Johnny and him started officially dating. Simon was relieved that Isaiah liked him and hasn't been aggressive about Simon dating his son. It made him wonder if Johnny or anyone else had a word with Isaiah beforehand.
Simon was pulled into a hug and Simon could hear Johnny whining in the background, "Pa, please!"
Isaiah releases Simon and turns to look at his son, "I finally have another son and I'm not allowed to hug him!?"
Simon did take pride in the fact, out of all Johnny and his sisters' partners, he was the only one Isaiah liked enough to call his 'son'. That did put Simon in a tricky position with the boyfriends of Eve and Carol, both seemed desperate for Isaiah's approval. And here Simon was, getting hugged and having a party thrown over the fact he was (finally) dating Johnny.
John cleared his throat and offered up the casserole dish he carried over, "I know you said not to bring anything but-"
"Hey, I'm not going to complain. I know for a fact you are one hell of a cook! You could compare to my wife!"
Johnny grabs Simon's attention by taking his hand, Eve making 'oohing' noises when he did. He casted a quick glare at her before dragging Simon off through the house to the back garden. Kyle followed, then Farah, and then Alex.
"I'm so sorry about my dad... and my sister... and I'm just gonna go ahead and apologize for whatever the rest of my family do."
"It's like they're throwing a baby shower, welcoming a new kid into the family," mused Farah as they walked into the thankfully MacTavish (other than Johnny) vacant space.
"You would think! Pa yelled 'I have another son' after I told him about Simon and Eve's boyfriend almost started crying."
Simon wanted to feel bad for Jay considering him and Eve had been dating for a solid two years now, but the guy stole Simon's lunch that Johnny's gran packed for him and he hasn't forgiven him for that. It was her famous lamb stew, so no, he's not being petty! Johnny had a couple foldable tables set up near the back corner of the garden near the fence. There was enough space for Simon and his tagalongs and Johnny and Hong-Jin.
"Wait, where's Hong-Jin?" Kyle asked as he put his book down on the chair he had chosen.
"He's coming in a bit. What about Ale and Rudy?"
"Ale is working an extra shift at his aunt's shop and Rudy is... Actually, I have no idea what Rudy does when he's not with Ale."
"... Is he a hitman?"
Simon snorts out a surprised laugh at Alex's quiet question. Farah just rubbed her forehead, clearly trying to hide the fact she wanted to laugh at the sincere question.
Kyle groaned at his boyfriend's seriousness, "Alex-"
"JOHNNY!"
Everyone flinched at the unmistakable voice of Hong-Jin from the other side of the fence. The fence shakes as Hong-Jin suddenly pops up on the other side of the nearly seven foot privacy, climbing over. He clearly met to drop down once he was on the other side of the fence, but his shirt got caught when he let go, causing him to flip over before the fabric ripped and crash to the ground. Everyone just stared in silence, Johnny looking fed up with Hong-Jin as the boy laid there without moving, clearly just defeated by his failed attempt at being cool.
And, of course, Johnny's mother had stepped outside with a tablecloth to put on one of the tables when this occurred. And her reaction would suggest this wasn't the first time she's witnessed something like this.
"Honey! You could've just used the side gate!" Muriel called, not even a bit worried about the boy as he finally got off the ground.
"Fence was quicker," Hong-Jin squawked out, the air knocked out of his lungs and his words not carrying like they normally do.
Hong-Jin straightens his back, Muriel making sure he was okay before she went back inside. The moment she went inside, Hong-Jin turned to Johnny, and in a voice only low enough so anyone from inside couldn't hear him, he asked a question.
"You still a virgin?"
"HONG-JIN WHAT THE FUCK!?"
Johnny's face turned red and Simon's did too as Farah, Kyle, and Alex started laughing hysterically. Johnny lunged at Hong-Jin with the clear intent to strangle him, the boy dodging to the side while somehow keeping his composure.
"It's an honest question! Are you gonna wait 'til marriage or-?"
God, he's just like Ale.
Simon covered his face, Farah patting his shoulder while wheezing. Johnny continued trying to fight Hong-Jin, face burning bright while he cussed out his friend. The yelling summoned Isaiah, who just froze Johnny and Hong-Jin in place with just a single glance.
"Johnny! We have guests!"
John walked out beside Isaiah, "Oh, don't worry about having a filter. I've heard worse when I served."
Isaiah whipped around to look at John, "You served!?"
That sparked something and the two men started talking, walking back inside. Johnny blinks before he looks at Simon and Kyle.
"Our dads just became best friends. I just know it."
Simon snorts and Johnny would abandon his mission to kill Hong-Jin. The evening would continue on and everyone would start helping bring out food for the grill and setting up a table for all of the dishes (the cold dishes being kept inside until later). Johnny's grandmother would appear, giving Simon a firm hug before she would turn to Hong-Jin.
"Honey, my sweet! I'm so glad you came! Does your mother want some food for later?"
"Gran, we already have so many of your containers!"
"You can bring them back with more of that kimchi your mother makes," Gran said with a smile.
"I'll ask my Umma to make some more for you."
"I would love that. And I would love it more if you didn't try jumping the fence with it."
Johnny had mentioned that his grandmother and mother were best friends with Hong-Jin's own grandmother and mother. They were friends before they had even known about each other, which led to them meeting and inevitably becoming friends. He was a practical MacTavish (by Johnny's mother and grandmother's words) and Simon was somewhat nervous about joining that status.
"Who wants to bet who will get here first: Nik or Alejandro or Rudy?"
"Ale and Rudy are coming around seven... Nik will probably spawn in the driveway after work or whatever the hell he does."
"Construction."
"Hmm, still don't believe that."
Kyle snorts and Simon rolls his eyes. All attention turned towards the house as Isaiah came out and went to the grill. Knowing that the MacTavish family was filled with amazing cooks, everyone started getting excited. Food, MacTavish made. Can't get better than that! Everyone started coming outside, Johnny's sisters and their boyfriends, his parents, grandmother, and John came out with Nik.
"Nik's here... before Ale and Rudy? Pay up!"
"Fuck, there goes my ten dollars."
"Shouldn't have betted on the horniest guy we know and his perfect boyfriend who he worships to show up before Nik."
"Why did you say his name like that?"
Simon decided to step into the house to call Ale, dodging affections from Nik who clearly had the intent of embarrassing him as he did. When he returned outside, Johnny ran up to him and whispered.
"There's a cake with 'pre-married' on it that Eve brought. I am so sorry-"
After dying from the description of the cake, the barbeque went off smoothly. Isaiah and John were attached at the hip at the grill, talking like they were old friends while Nik silently watched them from the food table. Simon was trying to stick with Kyle and Farah but they followed Alex when he got grabbed by Hong-Jin and now they were... dancing? They were doing something inside the house in the living room that appeared to be dancing. So Simon stuck with Johnny who soon was snatched by his mother and grandmother into the house straight to the kitchen.
Which left Simon, alone at the table because he was too nervous about following Johnny into the kitchen and definitely didn't want to join whatever madness the others were doing in the living room. He was debating on joining Nik where he was when Jay and Carol's boyfriend (was it Oliver?) walked over to him and sat down. Simon tensed up, having not spent any alone time with the two like... ever.
Jay was twenty-two and Oliver was nineteen, so they were old. And considering how Carol was, Oliver was weird.
"So, finally said 'fuck it' and got with a MacTavish," Jay started, speaking in a low voice like he might summon one of Johnny's family by mentioning their surname.
Oliver grunts, "Already the favorite, too..."
Jay grins, "How'd you cheat the system?"
"Maybe it's because his dad's military. Look at them, Isaiah could kiss him!"
Oliver said that in a particular louder tone than what Jay had been speaking in, clearly with no shame or fear. Coincidentally, Nik's rather blank staring had hardened and he looked less than friendly by this point. Simon blinked when he noticed, unable to recall the last time he ever had seen Nik make that face.
Eve walks over to them and Simon relaxes as she grabs Jay by the ear, "You! Stop tormenting my little brother!"
Simon always did like Eve.
"Babe- AH!"
Jay gets up and moves away from Simon, ear trapped in Eve's hold but he made no attempt to free it. Oliver blinked when Eve snapped her gaze on him, standing quickly and leaving towards the grill where Carol was talking with her dad.
"Go inside, Si. Think Johnny could use some saving from Ma and Gran."
Simon snorts before he stands and quickly makes his way inside. The moment Simon passed by the kitchen and Johnny saw him, he immediately started trying to get away from his mother and grandmother. Both women were speaking in Gaelic, sounding very loving yet sad. Maybe reminiscing memories.
"Ma- Gran-"
"Can I see my boyfriend?"
It was like using that word flipped a switch, Muriel and Emery gasp before they started cooing. Using the 'B' word seemed to strike them in the heart, freeing Johnny from their hold and letting him leave with Simon. Johnny was blushing, grinning as they walked into the hall.
"What?" Simon asked while matching his infectious smile.
"You called me your boyfriend."
"Is that not what you are?"
Johnny's smile widens, stepping closer to Simon. Simon felt his heart beat fast with how close Johnny was getting. But he didn't back away, he even leaned forward. The honking of a horn out front of the house made them snap out of their daze, blinking in surprise at the sudden, very loud and familiar noise.
"Simon! Lamejandro is here!"
Johnny couldn't help but laugh, having not heard Farah's 'affectionate' nickname for Alejandro before. Simon ran out of the house, finding Alejandro and Rudy getting out of Alejandro's car. Simon was quick to smack Alejandro's shoulder, the boy gasping in a feigned hurt as he clutched the box of drinks to his chest.
“How dare you!?”
"Told you to not honk the horn," Rudy said bluntly as he walked past Alejandro, patting Simon's shoulder as he goes by, “Congrats on getting a man, finally.”
Alejandro wheezes as Simon bites his tongue. This was going to be a long night, he just knows. They head back inside and Farah looks at Alejandro from her place on the living room floor, Hong-Jin beside her. Alejandro froze when they made eye contact, Hong-Jin looking at Farah as if he was waiting for her to make the first move on how to proceed.
“Can you dance, Lamejandro?”
Rudy quickly grabbed the drinks from Alejandro when it looked like the boy was going to either drop them or throw them to the floor.
“Oh? Can I dance?”
“That was the question, are you deaf?”
Simon snickers and leads Rudy to the dining room where a lot of drinks and utensils were being kept, “She’s going to bury him alive.”
“I’ll help her.”
Simon looks at Rudy, “I thought he was the ‘love of your life’?”
Rudy just looked at Simon while he placed the box down, “You know just as well as I that Ale’s ego needs to come down several hundred notches. If nothing is done it’s going to pop.”
Simon laughs as Johnny walks into the dining room. Rudy turns and looks at him, Johnny freezing in place. That’s what happens when you’re effortlessly gorgeous, you freeze people in their tracks… also Rudy could be terrifying. Johnny would’ve remained frozen there if Simon didn’t motion him to come over. Rudy showed mercy and looked away, allowing Johnny to walk over.
Of course, something had to happen. Though things were weird, it was expected. But Simon was really hoping nothing bad would happen, or anything negative. He expected too much considering so many interesting people (adults and children) were shoved into the same place. Andy, the youngest of Johnny’s sisters, ran in. She spotted him and Simon and pointed to the door she just ran from. Simon’s blood ran cold when he heard a steady rise of voices, an unmistakable argument.
“Ma’s ‘bout to fight that weird guy with the sunglasses!”
WHAT-
Simon was out the door, Johnny right behind him, before Andy could say any more. And there they were, Nik and Muriel MacTavish, yelling at each other in their respective mother languages. Simon picked up on most of what Nik was saying, which made him cringe. He didn’t understand anything Johnny’s mom was saying but judging by her family’s faces… it probably was on par with Nik’s obscenities.
Johnny’s grandmother came over and ushered Simon and Johnny inside, Andy slipping around them to join her sisters in cheering for their mother while their boyfriends watched in awed silence. The last thing Simon saw before being pushed inside was his dad getting in front Nik and pushing him back while Isaiah just came over and scooped up his wife and moved her away.
“Oh- Go sit with your friends. I’ll handle this.”
The look in Gran’s eyes made it impossible for Simon to doubt her. She went back out the door and it closed a little harder than what was necessary, Gaelic being muttered under her breath, and Simon staring at it in horror. Johnny silently grabbed his hand as they heard the yelling suddenly stop, both of them walking back to the living room rather quickly. Everyone greeted them with staring, wide eyes and not a single one of them daring to say anything.
Simon tugged Johnny along and they sat down on the couch where Alex was. Alex stared at them, eyes flickering to Kyle who was on the floor (maybe doing some strange alien dance before everything happened) as if to ask him how to proceed. The only thing keeping Alejandro from saying something was Rudy’s firm hold on his bicep. And Hong-Jin just looked too in shock to say anything.
So Farah said something.
“What the fuck is going on out there?”
“Nik-“
“Was fighting with my mom…”
Everyone became horrified.
“… well, so much for a wedding-“
Hong-Jin was smacked and Simon was flooded with fucking embarrassment over everything he just witnessed. Of course Nik would some how get into a fight with Johnny’s lovely mother! Of course he would-
Kyle ended up going to spy out the dining room window to see if he could learn anything. Simon was just replaying the image of Nik and Muriel yelling at each other, red faced and the clear fact that everything was escalating. Simon couldn’t recall ever seeing Nik like that… and it disturbed him. He was always so calm, silent in anger but always kept his head level. The most he ever had was a blank expression, a twitching eye and a tone in his voice. Not that.
“Si,” Farah said, Simon turning look at her.
She seemed to know what he was thinking and just reached over and placed her hand on his knee. Simon feels Johnny lean against him and he breathes out. God, something just had to happen…
Alex stood and went to go check on Kyle after a few minutes of uneasy silence. Simon and Johnny just leaned against each other, Farah sitting next to Simon and Hong-Jin, Alejandro, and Rudy sat on the floor. No one knew what to say, none of them expecting something like this to happen, not when everyone was so excited and happy. It just came out of nowhere. Everything was too quiet from the adults and Johnny’s sisters and their boyfriends, and Kyle hasn’t returned with any news.
The silence ticked on and it became too much for Simon. Alejandro noticed and cleared his throat.
“So… I was gonna wait until later to be a smartass but-!” Alejandro jumped up, “I think I’ll give it to you now. Be right back.”
Alejandro leaves, Simon hearing the front door opening and closing. Rudy just sighed, obviously knowing what Alejandro was getting.
“He thought it would be funny…”
“Thought what would be funny?”
“Matching tombstones,” Hong-Jin joked and Johnny snickered in response.
Farah rolled her eyes, “Bit expensive for a joke.”
Rudy grins, “You have no idea what Ale is willing to do for a joke. He will dip into his college savings his dad set up to accomplish one if he has to.”
Simon laughs knowing it was true. Alejandro loved a good, elaborate joke or prank. He could believe him misusing the money his dad saved up for him for a joke… but only if it would be hysterical. He’s not that eager to dance with death.
Alejandro returns, a rather small box in his hands. The smirk on his face made Simon groan, pre-annoyed by whatever was in that box. Johnny was staring hard at it, like he was trying to look through the box to see what was in it.
“Ale… I’m going to kill you.”
Johnny leans over to look in the box after Simon finally spoke after a moment of silence, “Wha- No-“
Alejandro starts laughing, proud of himself clearly, as Simon takes out a fucking collar. Hong-Jin starts cackling, Farah covering her mouth and snorting at the sight. Rudy just sighed, though he was definitely amused by his boyfriend’s antics. Simon drops the collar back into the box before he hands it off to Johnny. Simon stands and Alejandro jumps away, his laughter becoming more erratic as Simon tries to grab him.
After minute Simon managed to Alejandro, and that’s when Kyle and Alex returned from the dining room.
“Hey, I think-,” Kyle stopped talking when he entered the room, Alex bumping into his back as a result.
Simon releases Alejandro after Kyle stares at him for a good five seconds, of course judging him.
“So- Uh, find out anything?”
More judging staring before Kyle finally says something, “I think they resolved whatever that was. They were talking but whatever they were talking about made Johnny’s sisters get bored.”
Johnny snorts, “Oh yea, they’ve made up.”
The rest of that evening was rather tame. There was no more fighting or shouting matches, just smooth sailing. Whatever Gran did worked because now Nik and Muriel were rubbing shoulders, probably being even more friendly than what John and Isaiah were. Simon was glad whatever that was was now over, he was still mortified by the whole thing.
“At least they’re friends now…” Johnny murmured as he sat next to Simon in the corner.
“I was scared they were going to throw punches,” Simon mutters back.
“My ma would win.”
Simon snorts, the image of a man Nik’s size getting taken down by Johnny’s tiny mother was rather hilarious, “I’d pay to see that.”
Eve had pulled out lawn darts and Simon had a feeling it would be safer to sit in the corner away from Alejandro. Rudy was standing behind him, trying to get him to not fuck around because he might hurt someone. Hong-Jin was no help because he was daring him to launch the dart at a bottle balanced on a fence post.
“Ale, no-“
“ALE-“
Of course Alejandro had to throw it. He cannot refuse a dare, his ego wouldn’t allow it.
“What did you do with the box?”
“I- SHIT-“
Johnny jumps up and runs into the house. The last thing they needed was someone finding a box with collar with Simon’s name on it. That would really be the icing on the cake.
___
Fun Fact/pieces of information for the fic!:
'Honey' is Johnny's gran and mom's nickname for Hong-Jin cuz they think he's a very sweet boy :) (Johnny called him ‘Honey’ once and got slapped because he wasn’t allowed to use it)
Eve is Johnny's eldest sister, she is in college and is twenty-one. Carol is eighteen. Andy is sixteen (she torments Johnny the most out of the sisters because of how close in age they are)
Johnny's dad is around 6'7-6'8 while his mom is barely 5'3
Rudy is trans, still working on fleshing out his story in the au. Hopefully some more things with Rudy to help build up his background in the future!
Isaiah is described to be ‘oblivious’ and scattered brained. It’s just undiagnosed ADHD (where do think Johnny got it from?)
Jay and Oliver are decent guys, they're just a version of weird Simon isn't too familiar with. They're kind of jealous Isaiah jumped on liking Simon so much so quick but they don't care too much considering they're still liked and a part of the family
I have two sets of names for Soap's family. One set is used for when Soap has a good relationship with them in the au/fic and the other set is for when they aren't on good terms! (though I haven't had a chance to use the other set of names yet)
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padfootdaredmetoo · 10 months
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Hey, could you maybe write something with Tommy where the girl he likes is a bit of a party girl? How would be react to her wild behaviour? 🥂
Hey Anon,
I LOVE this idea! Thank you for sending it in! Hope you enjoy it!
Warnings: heavy drinking, fluff, murder, all the good stuff
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He sat there watching her dance recounting all the times he’d been black-out drunk. None of them resulted in him dancing like a whore in public. Or laughing so loud it carried over the music. 
He didn't understand how the same woman that had single-handedly got him out of a bind with not only another crime family but also the police, was the same woman here dancing on a table. 
Just hours previous to the celebration she had shot a man and now she was here dancing like she always did. 
The club was dark but the pink dress she wore would glow even with the lights out. Her hair was messed up and somehow looked even better that way. 
When she got like this he wondered somewhere in the back of his mind if she was worth pursuing. Parties were her thing. He’d met her as an event coordinator and while she complained about how boring his events were they had got along very well. 
Too well. 
She was always bombarded with men offering her drinks, expensive trips, and houses in tropical lands, and yet she always came back to him. She wanted to be by his side even in the cold British rain. 
She danced until the song stopped then let out a loud squeal when Esme poured more champagne into her mouth. 
“WE WONNNNN” She called out with her bejeweled fist in the air. Everyone erupted into loud cheers around her. 
Getting into clubs to celebrate wasn't an issue for a Shelby, but she had an even easier time. She once got dared to leap off a loft railing onto a chandelier. Not only was it official lore woven into the fabric of London, the owner just shook his head and laughed when she did it. 
She was a friend, valuable business partner, excellent lover, but could she be a wife? His stomach twisted at the thought of being with someone else, that was a feeling he hadn’t felt since Greta. A frown fell on his face. 
Would that be something she wanted? He looked for her again dancing and singing her heart out. Would she feel trapped? 
The night wrapped up and she crawled across the backseat of the cab. She slumped against him and smiled up at him brightly. 
“I saved you today.” She slurred happily.
“Yes, you did.” He answered with the slightest bit of a smile on his lips. 
“You owe me.” She said bringing a well-manicured finger up to push his nose.
“Is that so” He grabbed her jaw gently keeping her face tilted up towards him. Her eyes flared and he didn't know what he would do without her. Even if she wasn't incredible at her job, and networking, even if she was just a party girl, he wouldn't want to be with anyone else. “How can I make it up to you?” 
“Stay with me?” There was a deep sadness in her eyes that took Tommy by surprise. 
“That’s the plan.” He whispered.
“Stay with me forever?” She clarified and he smiled. 
“Forever.” He kissed the top of her head and handed her the box that had been on fire since he started carrying it weeks ago. He felt like he shouldn't give it to her when she was drunk. It should be some grand gesture, a proper event with people around. That’s what she would want, but he felt like it was the moment. 
Her eyes went wide. 
“SHUT UP” She took the box and gave him one last look before opening it. 
“Would you -” 
“YES -” She let out another squeal waving her hands animatedly. After lots of hugging and screaming she rolled down the window to shout at the people on the street.
“I”M GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!” She pointed to her finger and laughed as random people waved and cheered for her. 
Tommy just leaned back into his seat and enjoyed the pure joy that radiated off of his soon-to-be wife. After shouting at a few more people when stopped at red lights she rolled the window up and climbed onto his lap. 
She pressed her lips onto his and they enjoyed the rest of the ride back to their London apartment.
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celestialhole · 5 months
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Simon Riley x GN!reader headcanons
Warnings: Contains NSFW content below the cut, read at your own risk! Sorta proofread, random as fuck but here's your din din. Thinking about Simon Riley who uses his kids as weights for him to lift while working out. Just for fun. He likes hearing his kids laugh and giggle. Simon Riley who gets hella annoyed when your family/extended family buys so much crap for the kids. "The bloody hell they need this for? Don't we already have the damn pool outside!?" Simon looked down at the huge box in their living room, it was a goddamn bouncy house for the little ones. "I dunno Si. We can put it in the frontyar-" "WE ALREADY HAVE THE BALL PIT OUTSIDE!"
Never really celebrated his birthday before meeting you. You started giving him presents, taking him out, and taking him back to hotels (or your home) to ride him til' dawn. Now that you have little ones you all plan a small birthday party for him since he's old and grumpy. You give him one of his favorite desserts, have all the kids pile on him, and show him some love it resulted in him counting to 5 before chasing them all down while you record all of it.
Will fantasize about what life could've been like if his family were still here with him, what it could've been like if they had lived long enough to meet you. He's sure his Mother and Nephew would've loved you, and his brother would tease him n' say something like, "Now you know how it feels, it ain't as bad as you thought huh?" He wished to God he'd get to experience that in another lifetime. In my world, he doesn't celebrate Christmas and we know damn well why. If he's been with you for a long time he'll find a way to make something for you to make it special or he'll buy you something you mentioned wanting a few weeks or months back. But don't expect him to place a big ass tree in his apartment. If you manage to convince him to buy a tree he'll buy it and maybe a few ornaments he likes but the rest you're buying. Riley totally tore that bitch up and trust me, he tried to stop her but it was too early in the morning for that and he didn't want the tree anyways so he just sighs, puts some tea on the kettle grabs his reading glasses and his favorite book, and just relaxes on the couch as his military dog is tearing up your 350$ Christmas tree. "Jesus fucking Christ what happened in here!?" You stumbled over an ornament as you walked into the living room. Simon was chilling peacefully on the couch as Riley held a broken branch in her mouth and they both looked as if there wasn't a shit tone of ornaments and small pieces of the tree everywhere. It looked like a cluster fuck in your living room. "Tree became a chew toy," Simon mumbled. "I can see that.. And you didn't stop her?!" You narrowed your eyes at him. "Tried to, then it fell and I gave up," Simon took a sip of his tea and turned a page of the book he was reading. "Oh for fucks sake Simon.." You rubbed your eyes and leaned against the wall. He glanced up at you from the couch with an amused smile and looked back down at his book. "...This is what happens when we don't listen to Simon says-" "I'm kicking you and Riley out." You cut him off.
I see this man with an uncut shave because he's too lazy for that shit, however, if he notices he has a whole ass fucking jungle down there he'll trim it and then leave it alone for another 5 months. A solid 7 inches when soft and hard. Girth? Lots of it. Saggy balls. The type of man who doesn't notice when you get something done (hair, nails, etc). When you ask him if he notices anything different he'll immediately look at your ass to see if those squats did you any good. Speaking of your ass he loves your ass. Flat or thick he's smacking it when he casually walks past you. If you're plus-sized or just thicc it's even better. Don't ever bend over with this man in your perimeter. And it's even worse when you're in front of him and walking up the stairs cause he's staring hard at it. When you bend over he's smacking it, groping it, caressing it, and if he's really bold he's sneaking a quick hump against it. It's all shits and giggles till he's in that position. And you never hold back either. Now he doesn't trust walking up the stairs in front of you because you won't stop poking his ass and he hates it he loves you anyways. Call him daddy and he's not gonna speak or look at you for the rest of the day. You've made him spiritually nauseous good job. HE'S A BODY MAN BUT IN MY WORLD HE'S A THIGH AND TUMMY MAN! Also, I can see him being obsessed with ya nipple piercings if you ever got them. But nipple piercings are one thing, a genital piercing IS ANOTHER THING. Mutual masturbation is a must on the weekend mornings. He'll wake you up with pepper kisses to your neck while his hand is rubbing your tummy, when you wake up he'll gradually run his hands over your chest and pinch your nipple before moving his hand down to caress your arousal. He sucks the skin on your shoulder and neck to pleasure you and when you turn over to stroke his already hardened cock, he groans and moves his hips to slowly thrust his cock along your hand while his fingers slowly speed up. Now imagine his groans + his morning voice. This man loves you with every fiber of his being and tries his very best to make sure you know he loves you no matter what, so don't even think about asking him if he'll still love you as a worm. He'll keep you safely tucked in the pocket of his shirt and feed you noodles. He doesn't give two shits if you're hairy, plus-sized, or "unattractive". He'll cross the Amazon or even Antarctica to eat your ass I'm just saying. Don't protest or even speak, just bend over and let him have fun with his beautiful partner.
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momotorin · 5 months
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momos recent post has me thinking… gp ceo momo x ceo sana being like rivals in their industry and hate fucking each other
like sana invites momo over to a huge party she’s hosting in celebration for winning a big award for their company that momo IS PISSED she didn’t get and sana is soooo petty while telling her about how proud she is in her team
so momo ofc being momo brings sana to some bathroom, no one noticing the hostesses sudden leave because hello there are so many people there and momo fucking the shit out of sana while muffling her moans w her hand ;((
i want them both sooooo bad
you're so right for this omg....
stocks!
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gp!ceo!momo x ceo!sana
MEN DNI!!
it's the 27th annual kansai tech gala, and the biggest names in japanese and worldwide technologies were in attendance. one of which, minatozaki sana— the president of minatozaki industries, an established technology provider under a new ruling.
speculations say that the minatozaki empire has a new challenger: hirai tech, a start up in kyoto, owned by the hirais and anchored by the ceo— hirai momo.
sana doesn't really understand the weight of the governor's award, since she has a couple of it on the desk alongside national awards that the company has been winning in the past years.
momo, as an aspirant in the tech and business, looks at the award as something significant and a first for her company. if she wins, it'll be something monumental for her as finally, she could bring something at the family dinner table.
with pride and name up on the gamble for the gala tonight, sana can't miss the way that momo's eyes glisten in awe knowing recent tech inventions from other companies.
she should hate her, but why does she need to look that damn attractive with the coat and dress set she's wearing. damn.
as the night deepens, the gala brings out each event, which doesn't really pique sana's interest that much.
what intrigues her was the way momo held her martini.
"lonely night, superstar?" sana greets, teasing the woman as she sits by her side.
"hello, minatozaki," momo feigns a smile. "what brings you here?"
"wanted a breather from all the talk," sana sighed, signaling the bartender to get tequila. "why haven't you been around?"
"dunno, really didn't feel it with everyone," momo shifts her attention to the laughing men at her table. "it's awful and they smell like my dad."
sana laughs, finding momo genuinely adorable at this moment.
"saw that you haven't looked around too," momo mentions, taking another sip from her drink. "what's up with you, minatozaki?"
"didn't feel like it, either," sana chuckles. "can't really fit in with the chatter."
it's always going to be 'oh! the new minatozaki!' and 'oh! the hirai... is that the youngest, with the startup? not doing pretty well, i see..'. comments from these men who talk like their mouth is on their ass.
to say the least, it's suffocating. momo, as much as she hates being in the same room with minatozaki sana, wanted to stay in this bubble of tequila and martini side by side.
sana smiles at her, "you know, you're not so bad yourself."
"why do you say so?" momo chuckled at sana's randomness.
"i mean, this event is limited to tech pioneers only, like look... japan's finest are here," sana teases. "so being here is great already."
"well, that's a good point," momo just sighs. "but you know damn well why i'm here, right?"
"i know that very well, sweetheart," sana, in her head, flusters at the little slip. "but i bet it's me again this year, don't you think so too?"
turns out, she was right.
although momo's sales in record were reaching highs, and her startup gaining Invertors by the day, she still wasn't chosen by the judges at the kansai tech gala.
it was quite the disappointment.
later in the same week, momo accepts an invitation from her assistant to go to minatozaki sana's party with one thing in mind: hatred.
but blame the heavens for making sana much more attractive than any individual to walk on planet earth.
it was a real, full house, with a dj and smashing drinks type of party. momo, alongside her other executives, get drunk on free drinks. momo's head was fucking spinning and she's getting crazy at the fact that she hasn't seen sana yet.
the music stops for a moment, and sana, in all her dramatic glory, enters the stage with a cocktail in hand.
"hope you're having a nice night, everyone!" she was beaming, momo seeing her in that sparkling dress was like the second coming of christ. she can't believe she's saying those words in her head, but momo is already going crazy at the fact that she couldn't even hold sana. "this party," sana sighs, getting herself in a more comfortable position as she stands at the middle of the stage. "we need to have fun and reward ourselves because once again we've won! thank you everyone, thank you to my co-executives, the board, the managers, the staff, and everyone who makes our company great— this night is for you so, enjoy!"
sana gives out a toast to everyone in attendance, and momo just stares at her. not of ill intent, but with some want that only sana can satisfy.
and fuck, the way that dress fitted on sana made momo's stomach churn.
"hey, having a nice night too?" sana greets, teasing her again by tapping her shoulder. "you're smashed, aren't you?"
"probably?" momo says, half drunk and half conscious. "congratulations on the.. everything."
"aw, thanks," sana nudges at her. "glad you're not mad."
"you know what?" momo's tone suddenly deepens as she dismisses the glass off of her hand. "maybe i am mad. i'm mad at the way that you won and you just party. meanwhile, i have other things to worry about because i built my own ground without my parents and now they're shaming me because i didn't get your useless award," momo chuckled lowly, her disappointment in herself, her parents, and everyone was so evident that it broke sana. "so yeah! maybe we do have a problem!"
and fuck, the way momo raises her voice made sana almost wet her dress. she can't deny it, the woman is fucking hot.
"mo-"
before sana even continues her sentence, she gets dragged by the wrist by momo to the club's spacious bathroom, and now, she's pinned against the door, with momo's hands on the sides of her waist, and their breaths just an inch away.
"god," momo smirks, seeing sana's flustered state. "what would they think if they saw you like this, hm?"
"momo, ple-"
"what?" momo teases, running her hands along the exposed back of sana's dress. "look at you," she says, dragging them carefully to make sana look at herself in the mirror. "you wanted this, didn't you?"
"fuck," sana mutters under her breath. "yes, you don't know how much." sana doesn't know what she's talking about anymore. what matters is that she feels momo's hands trail to clasp her hand, interlocking it with hers as she faced momo's eyes.
momo's breath stilled as she kisses sana, hands tightening on her waist to pull her closer and raise her to the marble countertop.
it's all so intoxicating, all so overwhelming; momo doesn't know if she's drunk or she just wants to get drunk on sana and her undeniably delectable vanilla perfume.
"hmm," momo hums, feeling sana arch her back as she leaves marks on her collarbone. "i should've done this during that award night."
"y-you should've," sana stutters as momo slips off the almost non existent strap of her dress from her shoulders, revealing her supple breasts. "oh, fuck, baby." she moans, throwing her head back as momo kneads her other breast and her lips sucks on her nipple.
momo continues to hum, playing with sana's tits to tease her more. sana was so sensitive under momo's touch and that amused her.
"shit," momo sighs as she parts her lips away from sana's breast, seeing sana's blushed out form. "ah, i'm so hard," she laughs, pulling her pants down to reveal her boxers, her 10 inch cock printing on the fabric. sana licks her lips. "want it?"
"yes," sana fidgets with her fingers, but momo took her hand to palm on her length. momo's breath staggered as sana removed her boxers, her hardness springing to her clothed lower stomach. "hmm, so hard for me," sana began to wrap her hand around momo's length, feeling the girth of it, the veins, and momo's budding precum. she swipes her finger above momo's tip, and momo shudders. sana places her finger to her tongue, tasting momo. "you're fucking delicious, baby."
"don-"
"shh," sana says, just pulling momo closer by a kiss as she removes the rest of her dress, revealing her black lace panties. she guided momo's hand above her wetness. "feel how ready i am for you."
momo feels the wet cloth on her hands, and hooks her fingers to remove it from sana. "fuck, you're so wet," momo spreads sana's soaked pussy lips. "you dreamt of this, didn't you?" she kisses sana once more as she slides her length along her wetness, feeling it spread on her cock.
"i-inside please," sana pleads, her arms wrapping around momo's shoulder as momo inserts her length inside her hole. "fuck!" she screamed, feeling momo sink inside of her. "you're going to break me."
"fuck," momo says, pulling her length out of her pussy. "so fucking tight," momo enters again, burying her cock to the deepest part of her walls as sana moaned loudly. "going to fucking break you."
momo held sana by the waist, her thrusts gradually speeding as she felt sana tighten her pussy walls around her. sana was full on screaming that she was sure people could hear them.
"so loud," momo stops for a while as she flips sana over the counter, her ass now facing her as they see each other in the big mirror of the bathroom. "you're so fucked out already," momo teases, holding sana's hair up to relieve her a little. "should i stop, sweetheart?"
"no, fuck," sana sighs, pulling momo closer by tapping her thighs. "fuck me more."
"hmm," momo chuckled lowly, putting her length inside sana's wetness once more. "fuck." she thrusts, feeling sana pulse her walls against her cock. "are you g'nna cum, baby?"
"yes!" sana shouts, and momo pulls on the makeshift ponytail she made for her, making sana arch her back. sana continued to let out screams, as momo pounded her cock inside of her, hitting every spot she hasn't even known before. "fuck, fuck," sana moans, her grip on the marble was tight because of the pleasure. "more!"
"fuck yeah, baby," momo says, pulling sana up for her to be held by the waist. "you're going to make a mess on my cock, hm?" she whispered on sana's ear as she continued to thrust. "look at your pretty face," she says, making sana look at the mirror. fuck. it was so hot; momo's cock going in and out of her, her smudged lipstick, her messy hair, the marks... sana thinks she's never been better. "shit, you're getting tighter, baby? you like that?"
sana just hums, biting her lip down to at least suppress some of her moans because she knows that she has been so fucking loud. it was useless still.
there was a slam from the door, "sana? you there?"
"shit," momo immediately puts her hand on sana's mouth to muffle her moans as she continues to thrust inside of her. "keep quiet, pretty." momo whispered as her other hand made its way to part her pussy and rub her clit. sana screams on momo's hand.
"no," momo loudly answers, her cock still buried inside of sana's tight pussy. "she's not here!"
the person shouts from the outside, "oh, okay."
momo thrusted faster, with the thrill of knowing that someone was outside. sana's grip on the counter was so tight, and her pussy was literally closing up on momo's length.
"you'll like it even when someone catches us, don't you?" momo teases, whispering again as her fingers rub tight circles on her clit, urging her to cum. "fuck, cum."
sana screams on her hand, her cream spreading on momo's cock as momo continues to thrust inside of her, chasing her own high.
"mmgh," sana moans in the sensitivity as momo removes her hand to put on her waist, thrusting inside her pulsing pussy further. "shit- ah," sana reached out for momo's hand, holding it tight for some sort of support. "i'm fucking sensitive, baby, st-"
momo slaps sana's ass, a red mark leaving on her as she trusted, "i don't fucking care," momo growls, her cock already so wet and soaked with sana's juices. "i need to cum inside of you."
"fuck, yes please!" sana screamed as momo's thrusts stuttered, now focusing on hitting her g-spot. sana comes once more, and momo's cock pulsed, white ropes of cum shooting inside of her.
"haah," momo sighs, holding sana close as she feels sana lose balance. she removes her length away from sana's pussy, so wet and trickling with both of their bodily juices. she held sana once more, helping her to get on the marble countertop, making her sit. "wait, fuck," she said, getting a couple of tissues from the tissue box and helping sana clean up their mess. "we made a mess."
"thanks," sana stares at momo, who was cleaning up the inside of her thighs and slipping her panties back on. "you're not as bad as i think you would."
"you really thought that i suck at fucking?" momo laughs, also cleaning her soaked dick before tucking it away inside her boxers.
"you look like a loser, can't help to think that you fuck like one too," sana teases, kissing momo's cheek. "what about... taking this to my place?"
"good offer, champ," momo chuckles, helping sana zip up her dress once more and fix her hair. "but you've got a night to finish."
"oh shit," sana curses at the realization. "how long were we out?"
"like," momo looks down at her watch. "i dunno, 45 minutes? someone was finding you by the door a little while ago."
"ah, alright, they probably wouldn't mind..." sana chuckles, her arms wrapping around momo's shoulders as they kiss once more. "see you next time, loser."
"sure," momo laughs. "g'nna fuck you 'till you break, next time, baby."
194 notes · View notes
fruitsoxs · 11 months
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hello socks:)) I absolutely loved both your jealousy drabbles, and the midnight munchies too, thank you so much!! there's this thought that's been in my head for a while, may I ask a drabble about it? if you feel like it, of course!
Since No Man's Land is a huge desert, people obviously wear practical clothes more than anything (a priest being the exception that proves the rule), so how about Wolfwood and Vash seeing their crush (reader) in elegant, fancy clothes for the first time?
sorry this took so long!! i wasn't exactly sure how to go about this for awhile lol
warnings; some slight nsfw on wolfwoods end. nothing too graphic though!
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Vash
It’s  a bit of a shock when Vash gets the invitation. He had just got done saving some random kid from a group of bandits, he had no idea she was the daughter of some family
The father immediately offers to host a celebration to thank Vash for saving his kid
Because he’s humble, Vash says it’s not necessary, but the family insists. So he’s stuck going to a random fancy event as the man of the hour
He invites you, because of course he does. There’s nobody he’d rather go with
You are given some money to buy clothes and Meryl takes you and runs
She helps you pick out the nicest clothes she can find
It’s not what you’re use to, but you can’t deny the fact you look kind of good
The night of the celebration you meet Vash outside the inn you’re staying at
You look…well.. Amazing
Your hair is done, your clothes are beautiful, and you have this shy unsure smile that makes Vash want to melt
His jaw is on the floor
He can’t stop looking at you.
“You…look…wow.” is all he can probably say. Something dumb because he can’t find the words to describe you.
He cannot stop looking at you the entire night
At the party everyone is trying to flood his attention, but all he wants to do is be with you lol
Asks you to dance, and his hands are all shaky
It’s a really sweet, soft moment. 
HOWEVER 
Everything comes to a stop when somebody recognizes him as a wanted criminal lol
Suddenly the two of you are being chased through the city in your fancy clothes
He keeps apologizing, but you just smile and laugh
You truly do love him
“I’m sorry-” he gasps for the millionth time that evening. Pressed behind a wall, hiding from any prying eyes. You shake your head. “It’s fine Vash. It happens.” you whisper. You’re trying to catch your breath after being chased down the street. “It’s not fine.  It was such a nice evening, and I ruined everything.” he mumbles, his gaze cast downwards.
You sigh. “Vash seriously-” He cuts you off. “I mean the food was great, and the dancing was amazing, and you look beautiful! It should have been a nice night, but of course just me existing-” this time you cut him off, pressing your lips against his softly. He lets out a shocked gasp, but eventually his arms wrap around you as he kisses back.
It’s  a soft kiss. 
When you pull away, he’s smiling again. “Vash, I had fun tonight. I have fun with you every night. I don’t mind being chased around a bit.” you mumble, face still close to his. “You didn’t ruin anything.” you end this statement with a small peck on his lips. “I promise.”
He pulls you in for a hug, pressing your face against his chest. “I’m glad.” 
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Wolfwood
Wolfwood is fully confused about the entire ordeal
He doesn’t understand the need to sneak into some party
No matter how many times you explain to him that you’re trying to get some information he doesn’t get it.
But whatever, he’ll play along. Maybe the food will be good- and there might be some fancy rich person champagne 
He puts on some stupid suit - it isn’t much different from what he usually wears. He just actually has to button it up (a shame)
And he waits for you to get done with whatever you’re doing to get ready
When you walk out, he has to keep himself from physically reacting
You look…stunning 
He begins to think this party might not be such a bad thing if he gets to see you like /that/
He smirks playfully and offers you his arm
You know that smirk means he’s planning something devious, but you just sigh and take his arm so he can escort you to the party
You have to sneak in, but it’s pretty easy. Wolfwood distracts the guards, and you flash them your best smile. 
Once you’re in you immediately start crawling around to look for the information you want- but wolfwood has other plans
He likes you. He likes you a whole lot, and he wants to enjoy this evening with you
He starts pulling you to the dance floor, making some excuse that you two gotta act the part
It’s kind of a clumsy dance, but you have fun
By the end of it, his hand goes a bit lower and you look at him with your lips parted
You don’t get the information you want
Instead wolfwood takes you into a secluded room so he can have you all to himself 
And he /finally/ kisses you…and maybe a bit more
His lips are on yours as his hands travel downwards. You whine a bit and push against him, trying to tell him it’s not the time for this. He doesn’t care. He just shoves his tongue into your mouth and pulls you closer, gripping your waist tightly. You let out a soft moan and give up, letting him do as he wishes. You want this too- to hell with what your original plans were.
He smiles a bit, and nobles on your lips as he pulls away. “Good.” he mumbles, his voice dropping an octave lower. His hands continue to travel down until the door to the room you’re in starts to open. You grab onto him and quickly pull him in the closet. He lets out a soft gasp, but follows your direction.
Before anybody can see you, you’re trapped inside the small room, back pressed against the closet door with Wolfwood hovering above you, his arms on either side of your head. His body is so close to yours. On the other side of the door you hear two people start to fight, but you don’t care. Not when Wolfwood drops his head to press his lips against your neck. It seems you’re in for a long night.
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fang-and-feather · 4 months
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Ikemen Vampire - Charles x Pureblood Reader
For A Series of Firsts hosted by @aquagirl1978, prompt(s): First Celebration and First Time and Sweet & Spicy Wintertime hosted by @xxsycamore prompt(s): Quickies at the holiday party
Just a little bit late from the event's ending because the first time I posted, it wasn't showing up so I tried reposting. Hope it's okay
And is it showing up now? Doesn't seem so
My last fic of 2023 (I finished it before midnight) and first of 2024 (I tried to repost it a little late for reasons stated above). Funny that I started and ended last year with smut (and technically started this one as well)
Rating: Explicit/NSFW
IkeVamp Masterlist / General Masterlist / AO3 Link
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You knew the two of you shouldn’t be doing that. Not here or now. You had just gone out to get some air, and Charles followed you when he felt lonely. Or maybe someone said something to him.
The others would be expecting you back at the party. If you didn’t, they would start making assumptions. Some right, although embarrassing, but the others worried you the most.
Things were already a little wacky because the residents already knew Charles, and not in the best of circumstances. You didn’t want to make things worse. Not when it was the first party you had with your boyfriend and also the first party you had with your only considered family. It was important to you that at least someone in your family supported you, having already run from the rest of them.
Everyone was trying to be nice - except the guys who were rarely nice at all - especially your uncle. It was clear he wanted to support you but was worried at the same time, for a lot of reasons.
But if not now, when? Your uncle would never let Charles spend the night.
So you let him pull you into a random, empty room and push you against the wall as he kissed you. He pushed up the skirt of your dress, slipping a hand under it to gently caress your thigh, then higher, pushing your underwear aside, touching you directly.
His kisses moved to your neck, and as soon as you gave him access, he bit you, probably just to heighten your pleasure and sensitivity because he didn’t linger, only licking the initial rush of blood from the wound.
A couple of fingers pushed easily inside you, moving slowly, keeping you just at the edge. With one hand, you tried to get his pants out of the way, and with the other, you pulled him closer. Charles tilted his head, giving you space to bite him back. He shuddered as you did so, your bite always seeming to have a stronger effect on him.
Charles’ hand left again, only to adjust your positions. Your bodies were joined in one swift motion, and when you pulled back from him, bit you again. That sent you over the edge with an explosive sensation.
You held tight to him as he kept thrusting into you, hard and fast, while whispering words of love and praise in your ear and making you see stars with every movement overstimulating you.
He joined you soon with a cry of your name, the two of you almost collapsing to the ground, but Charles managed to move you to a sitting position.
The two of you laughed, snuggling into each other.
“I can’t believe we did this.” You muttered.
“It was good. But next time, I would rather take my time with you.”
“Then don’t do it somewhere we can get caught".”
But your complaint was empty,and both of you laughed again.No. This was not your last quickie, and not the last one in a daring place like that. Now you only hoped no one had heard you and that you could get sorted quickly enough to return to the party.
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Tag List: @tele86, @nightghoul381, @natimiles
If you want to be tagged on future writings, you can reply to this post or send me a message
IkeVamp Masterlist / General Masterlist
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sugarywishes · 11 months
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I'VE FINALLY FINISHED MY QUINN AND TIMM TIMELINE 😎 (it's not as cool as it sounds but it would be rad if you CHECKED IT OUT!!)
Childhood
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So *ahem* (🤓) in my little silly headcanon world, Quinn comes from a very academic oriented family. You either study and become successful or you become a failure (just like her sister). And as the 'savior/golden child' of her family, she was very often pressured into becoming as successful and educated as possible, even if it meant she would be surrounded by books and essays all throughout her childhood. (And also she had no friends :( )
As for Timm, he's always had the 'competitive dancer' dream, even as a little kid! But growing up in a relatively less than financially stable environment, he soon realized that maybe his dream career could possibly end in failure (homelessness, broke etc) , and maybe it wasn't worth risking your future for a childish dream. So he tried his best to forget and studied as much as he could, he'd rather settle for a well-paying job that a dream that could totally fail, right? (Also he was totally a theater kid growing up I MEAN COME ON HIS HALLOWEEN COSTUME IN THE GAMES IS LITERALLY ERIK)
Law School Days (awe yeaaa)
(Can you tell I am indeed very consistent with my art, no random anatomy or facial structure changes here!)
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Huzzah! We've made it to the time period where they find meet!!
So at this point, Quinn is jaded and studious and stuff, and dislikes talking to anybody (which includes professors/teachers LMAO, she needed to stay on that independent knowledge grind) and by a random coincidence, she happened to have classes with none other than Timm himself, she found him very annoying at first but by the end of her education, she was more than ready to marry him
And Timm is still a huge dork, albeit a very burnt out dork, he studied long and hard to be able to have a well-paying career, and now he's at law school! Surely he'll enjoy a life as a rich lawyer, right? Anyways, he accidentally got a crush on that mean and quiet chick in his classes, so what better way to get with her than to ask her out to any event the school had! For the first few years she'd reject him immediately, but eventually she caved in, and hey! They got married, what a wonderful couple! Hopefully they sta-
POST DIVORCE ERA 🔥🔥🔥
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So...uh, what exactly happened?
Quinn woke up around 4 AM (yes really, that's when she always gets up for work), and she expected to find her husband of many years still sleep and she'd had to wake him up. She didn't find him, the left side of the bed was empty with the exception of his wedding ring, a hastily written note that doesn't explain shit, and divorce papers with his signature already on it.
So needless to say, she's still really pissed off about that, and petty too (she renamed Quinn, Timm and Associates to LITERALLY Just Quinn and Associates!!) And she refuses to acknowledge her marriage with Timm (Penny keeps pestering her about it but Quinn just dodges the questions everytime)
And oh boy, Timm, HE REALLY MESSED UP, like yeah, you were miserable with your life as a lawyer and you didn't feel like your true self at all, but you couldn't have waited to get a divorce until Quinn woke up?? And blah blah blah, the events of Papa's Bakeria happen, Cecilia canonically gets the dance studio, leaving Timm to STILL work at the Bakeria (at least until he can actually get money, he left all of his to Quinn as compensation for literally abandoning her 😭😭)
ALSO ALSO!! Super funny little detail I wanted to mention, but when Quinn and Timm were announced as divorced, both of their respective families CELEBRATED (Quinn's parents had what was essentially a birthday party styled divorce celebration, complete with pinatas and goodie bags) (And Timm's family partied like there was no tomorrow) Quinn's family thought Timm was an idiot who wanted to marry Quinn to steal her money, and Timm's family thought Quinn was some mean and cruel woman who was going to isolate Timm away from them (You can tell how upset the families will be when Quimm gets back together 👀)
*DON'T REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION*
*NO RESUBIR SIN PERMISO*
*НЕ РЕПОСТИТЬ БЕЗ РАЗРЕШЕНИЯ*
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an-au-blog · 7 months
Text
One piece headcanons I have not because I think are true or important, but because everything will be just a little bit funnier (or just more fun) if they were true, but they get less and less pg with each one:
Luffy has eaten worms on a dare as a kid and would do it in the blink of an eye in present days as well (he also thinks it's funny)
The first time Robin and Nami have "girl time", just to do their nails, or hair, or dress up cute, she almost cried from how nice it felt to have that
Usopp draws a lot but never shows his art because he has confidence issues, he sends Kaya some sketches whenever he can
Everyone thinks Luffy can't read, he can but he's very dyslexic and has severe adhd and he just can't bring himself to stay still longer than to read 2 sentence
Zoro is shortsighted, that's why he always gets lost and probably can't read, but no one knows because he never says anything and thinks that "everyone sees a little blurry it's fine"
Nami and Usopp gossip all the time, and I mean ALL the time and about everything and everyone
(↑bonus) Robin knows all the gossips but she mostly just listens, silently enjoying it
Sanji mispronounces some words because he's seen them only in books and because he's french and french people spell words in a very fucked up way (I've studied french for 4 years I have the right to slander it, sorry)
All the strawhats are at least a little in love with their captain and no one says anything but they all kinda know
Sanji can barely find pants that suit him because of how disproportionately big his leg muscles are
Luffy knows about sex and all that jazz from Ace, but with "censored" words because he was pretty young when they had "the talk" (like how he called his dick and balls his "family jewels" when he was on Amazon Lily Isla)
(speaking of) Ace had the most embarrassing conversation with Luffy after asking one of Ace's dates if they were one of his brother's "naked sleepover friends"
Robin would or at least would think about slapping Franky's ass on a daily basis
Brook wanted to try jacking off at least a couple of times but he wasn't sure how it would even work
Everytime the strawhats throws a big party to celebrate a victory with everyone they saved/helped, Zoro "accidentally" ends up in the middle of a random gay threesome
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laevanders · 1 year
Text
Hm
Incorrect Quotes with the caballeros.
Cause I can
Donald, driving José and Panchito: So how was your day?
Panchito: We almost got surprise adopted!
Donald: What?
José: We almost got kidnapped.
Donald: Oh, okay.
Donald: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?
Panchito: Donal' and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
José: *Sighing* What did B do?
Panchito: he chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Donald: Who wants a steering wheel?
Panchito: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?
José: The car takes a screenshot.
Donald: For the last time, get the fuck out.
Donald: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold?
Panchito: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house.
José: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million.
Panchito: Good thinking.
*insert donald having flashbacks to his uncle*
Panchito: How's the sexiest person here~?
Donald: I don't know, how are they~?
Panchito, flustered: I-
José, from across the room: I'm doing great, thanks!
Panchito: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
Donald: Wasn't C with you?
José: In my defense...I was also left unsupervised.
I feel like this one is canon
José: I told Donal' his ears flush when he lie.
Panchito: Why?
José: Look.
José: Hey Donal'! Do you love us?
Donald, covering his ears: No.
Panchito: Are you sure this is the right direction?
José: Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!
Donald: In that case, we're definitely lost
The squad is trying to con some random guy
Panchito: Um, Jose, why are you pretending I'm this guy's family?
José: We need money!
Panchito: You're scamming him?
José: I was thinking more like flat-out stealing from him?
Panchito: What?! No way!
José: Why not? We already stole Donald!
Donald: Hey guys
Panchito: No, we didn't. Donald can think and talk for themself, they can do whatever they want!
Donald: I wanna steal
Panchito: What do you think Donal' will do for a distraction?
José: he’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*
Jose: ... or he could do that.
Donald: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.
Panchito: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.
Donald: Not when you’re playing with José, it’s not. They put words like “ephemeral” and I put “dog.”
Donald: Hey, what are you reading?
José: This is my magic book where any ink spilled shows a scripture of the future, however it bears a curse making it broken, and as such in order to make any scripture appears, I have to do it myself.
Donald: Impressive! I must have it for myself!
Panchito: So it’s just a Notebook?
José: It’s just a Notebook.
José: Everyone, calm down! We're grown-ups, let's deal with this like adults!
Panchito: So, we're just going to wing it and hope for the best?
Donald: Obviously. Now, Zé, pass the shovel.
Donald: Yesterday, I overheard Panchito saying “Are you sure this is a good idea?” and José replying “Trust me,” and I have never moved from one room to another so quickly in my life.
Donald: Just think about this! I’m your hottest friend.
Donald: No, that’s José… I’m your nicest friend.
Donald: No, Panchito... I’m your friend!
*Zé and Panchi proceeds to shower him with affection*
Panchito: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited.
José: "If"
Donald: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and they might not even die.
José: I dare you-
Donald: Panchi is not allowed to accept dares anymore.
José: Why not?
Panchito: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.
José, to Donald: ...And I need you and Paco to help, and by "help" I mean "do everything."
Panchito: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Donal has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them.
José: By forcing him to have fun at a party that he don’t want to be at?
Panchito: I knew you’d understand.
José: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body.
Donald: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot.
José: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!
Panchito: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...
José texting group chat: What flavour of ice cream do you guys want? I’m at the store so be quick!
Panchito: Moose Tracks is good!
Donald: What the fuck is that!?
Panchito: *Gasp* How dare you insult moo-
Donald: No. No no not that. What the hell. Why do you spell flavor like flavour. It’s like you have flavor but then this guy shows up and is like “Oui Oui Would you like chocolate flaVOUR or vanilla flaVOUR.
José and Panchito: what?
Donald: I don’t get it why add the EXTRA u when it’s PERFECTLY FINE AS IT IS!?
José: You done now?
Donald: Yeah ok.
J and P: ...
Donald: ...Can I have the Mint Chocolate chip flavour?
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Fuyuhikos birthday is coming up (aug 15) and I really love him, I was wondering if you have any Fuyuhiko x Reader(sfw) birthday headcannons?
Oh my god birthday boy!! I'm always happy to celebrate fandom birthdays, lets do this!
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Fuyuhiko Birthday Headcanons
Fuyuhiko's birthday is complicated
He was born into power as a Yakuza leader and was taught to be intimidating and mature
He never really... had birthdays before. Everytime it would come up it was never emphasized or celebrated, the most he would get would be a small birthday wish from Peko. Even then she had to do that in private to avoid scrutiny
Seeing all the other kids in the area have parties always stung a bit. All the friends and gifts and cake were so tantalizing yet so far away. It was even worse as he was never allowed to join any party, he just had to watch from afar
The one time a family member tried to throw him a party it was just a mess. So many random people in power, overwhelming music blaring, hundreds of gifts that weren't even stuff he liked, it was just awful for him. It came to the point that he dreaded his birthday every year
So when you came along and started asking him about his birthday, he kinda blanked. Fuyu had no idea how to respond, and almost got defensive about it. What were you planning, were you mocking him or something?
It took awhile but you eventually got him to slightly understand your intentions, but still got no real input or enthusiasm
When his birthday came he honestly expected either nothing or everything. Either radio silence or a big over the top stupid party. Both sounded awful to him on different extremes
So when he came home and found you in his kitchen with Peko, a small funfetti cake on the table with a lit candle on top, and two small wrapped presents to the side... he actually started to cry
Never in his life had someone done something so sweet and thoughtful. You took into account his comfort levels and emotions instead of just doing what you would like. This party was for him, and only him
Peko quickly got tissues to wipe his face as you lead him inside by the hand
You and Peko gave your own little speeches about how much he means to you two, and how important his happiness means to you. This got the tears running again, oops
Finally turning off the eye faucets, he was able to compose himself and open his gifts
Peko got him a brand new suit and tie in his favorite color, with a big bag of his favorite candy hidden inside
You got him a customized silver watch with a dragon on the clock face. On the underside you had the date you got together engraved, along with a small heart and your initals
Thankfully he managed to not start crying again, but you could see the joy building as he put the watch on and caressed the suit fabric
After he blew out his candle, you all enjoyed a slice of cake and just had a great time! You put on some music while Peko told stories about their childhood together (Fuyuhiko was so embarrassed it looked like his blushing face was gonna explode)
At the end of the day, you asked him what he wished for. He smiled and said it wasn't important, so you shrugged it off
But in reality...
Fuyuhiko made a wish that the three of you could do this together every year, for the rest of his life
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taliesin-19 · 2 months
Text
Random Fact of the Week - Birthday edition
Elizabeth Evelyn Potter--named after Abby's mother and grandmother respectively--was born on June 28th, 2015.
Today, she would be turning 1 year old. And Harry just prayed the house would stay standing long enough for them to celebrate.
Beep beep beep beep beep
"What the bloody hell is that?" James said covering his ears as he came down the stairs still in his pajamas, hair a mess.
(It was currently 2pm. Abby claimed this was normal for 14 years olds.)
Lizzie immediately broke out into startled cries at the noise, lifting her arms up from her high chair as Harry walked by.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Abby said, taking a smoking tray out of the oven.
With Lizzie in one arm, Harry pulled out his wand and pointed it at the screeching fire alarm to silence it before dispelling the smoke from Abby's...cake? He wasn't positive, but he didn't want to hurt her feelings by asking.
Abby was not a delusional person by any means. But for some reason, she had it in her head that she was meant to be a baker.
However after so many years spent witnessing the carnage she wrought with that oven, Harry could safely say, she was not.
And that was perfectly fine. He was more than happy to help out with the occasional bake sale or the hastily agreed upon dessert for a party. But for some reason, Abby had insisted on baking Lizzie's cake herself.
"Yikes," James said, eyeing the darkened blob on the tray. "Was it supposed to come out like that?"
Lizzie immediately pushed her body towards James at the sound of his voice. "Ame! Ame!"
"Don't let her touch it," Harry said quietly as James took Lizzie in his arms and started making goofy faces at her.
Harry then turned to Abby who was still eyeing the blob with consideration, a knife in her hand.
"Do you think if I try to scrape off the burnt parts, it'll--"
"No," Harry said, gently pushing her arm down.
"Magic?" she said, hopefully.
"Don't think Merlin himself could get you out of this one," James said, causing Harry to give him a look of disapproval.
A sound at the kitchen door made them turn around and they saw Teddy walking in with Lily attached to his side, chattering his ear off while Al, a respectable distance from his other side, was doing the same.
Various shouts of "Teddy!" rang throughout the kitchen.
Burnt cake and knife long forgotten, Abby ran over and brought him into a hug, practically squeezing the life out of him.
Harry and James followed suit, the latter giving him a very 'cool' and 'manly' slap on the back.
Only Lizzie seemed hesitant, smiling shyly at him from Abby's arms.
Teddy was so busy these days with work that he didn't often get the chance to stop by, and Lizzie was still so little. Harry would be surprised if she even remembered him at all.
"Aiw...aiw," she said, rubbing the top of her head.
"What, baby girl?" Abby said, looking down at her.
"Aiw!" she said, jumping down in her mum's arms before pointing at Teddy.
"Is she saying 'ew'?" Al said, looking amused.
James snorted a laugh. "What's that phrase?" he said, bumping Teddy's elbow with his. "From the mouth of babies, or something?"
"Out of the mouths of babes," Teddy corrected.
"Aiw, aiw!" Lizzie said, rubbing her head again.
With a gasp, Lily looked at Teddy then back at her sister. "She's saying 'hair'! She wants you to change your hair!"
Harry and Abby met each other's eyes and grinned.
"Do it, Ted," Harry said with excitement. "Let's see if that's what she wants."
Not needing to be asked twice, Teddy turned his hair from turquoise to lime green to red to purple to neon yellow, all the while causing Lizzie to squeal with happiness and clap.
Harry was beaming the entire time, unable to believe his baby girl was this smart. It had been at least a month since they'd last seen Teddy, and she'd remembered.
He leant in and kissed her chubby cheeks as she continued to giggle at Teddy's hair.
And as always when all his family was under one roof and happy, Harry couldn't help but feel like the luckiest man in the world.
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I watched the Prouder and Louder episode and they really shouldn't have even tried it with that storyline. The group being mad at Zoey was uncalled for, it's not like she can change that. Zoey wasn't even there for the initial "he only dates white girls" conversation, and as soon as she heard about it, she immediately asked Noah about it and dropped him. They should have had Zoey in on the conversation to hear Maya's original comment about Noah.
They were all truly horrible to her. They really uninvited her to a party she's been coming to for years, because of a boy.
It's not like she's just some random white girl, she's their friend, them thinking she's so undesirable and that's the only way a celebrity.. a boy would like her was just horrible.
It's giving "we only hang around you because you make me feel better about myself."
They should have bought the conversation to Noah, like do you realize how much self hate that kid has, like what do you mean you only date white girls. That would have been a good opportunity for his parents or one of Penny's parents to give him a talking too.
Would he still have bought a white girl to the dance? Yeah probably but now he would have been more aware of his actions..
Edit: I thought it was weird they just believed Maya about Noah's preference, so many people lie about their family members living near celebrities and I know she's supposed to be the new cool and chill character. But them just believing her from the go and ganging up on Zoey someone they've know for years, wasn’t it.
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dum1s-writings · 1 year
Note
leshawna x reader
~~~Total Drama~~~
Since there's nothing more to this I'll be having fun. 😊😊
Pronouns: He/Him
Warnings: character being out of character
~~~~~~~~
"Are you really signing up for that show, Shawna?" -Y/N- was laying across his fashionable friend's legs. "The one hosted by that McClean guy."
"Yeah. A chance to become famous and win some cash." Leshawna flipped through her magazine. "Besides it's better than wasting my summer doin' nothing."
The teen didn't say anything more. He'd thought about signing up for it but tossed that idea out the window. He wasn't even planning on watching it but that might have to change.
__________
"I'M IN!!! I GOT IN!!!!" Leshawna cheered loudly in the middle of the cafeteria. People looked her way. "I'Mm gonna be on Total Drama Island!!" The others cheered and congratulated her. -Y/N- sat frozen, obviously he was excited and super happy for Leshawna. But on the other hand....she was his only friend. She'd be gone for nearly the entire summer.
He'd be alone.
"Party at my place to celebrate!!" Some random girl shouted and got the crowd going even crazier.
"-Y/N-?? You okay, sugar??" A voice spoke into his ear quietly. The teen looked over and saw Leshawna, looking worried. He just nodded and smiled. "You'll be my plus one to the party, right?"
"I wouldn't have it any other way, Shawna." That got a proper smile out of the girl.
__________
It was the day of Leshawna leaving. She was surrounded by family and friends. All wishing her luck and promising to root for her. She kept an eye out for her closest friend though. Unable to find him in the crowd surrounding her.
She sighed and hid any disappointment. The limousine picking her up stopped by the crowd gaining gasps. A man stepped out and took her luggage. "We'll be heading to the dock where you'll ride to the island, miss."
Leshawna squealed. "Ooooh. Finally being treated the way I knew I should be!!" She turned to her family and friends and gave them hugs one more time. The man held open the door for the girl. She was getting ready to step in, ready to move on and (try to) forget about the one person she wanted to see most.
"LESHAWNA!!!" A shout rang out. "WAIT!!"
"-Y/N-?" The dark skinned girl looked behind her. There pushing through the crowd was her favorite friend. "I thought you weren't comin'." She met the boy in the middle, picking him up while hugging him.
"I wouldn't be able to look myself in the mirror if I missed this." -Y/N- tightened his hold on the girl. "You're important to me, Shawna." He mumbled.
"Aw, sugar" Leshawna started feeling a little emotional, "you're important to me too."
They stood there for a bit longer before someone coughed. The two separated quickly, embarrassed.
"Promise you won't forget me when you get famous?" -Y/N- smiled sadly.
"I'd rather give up my favorite haircare products first." Leshawna gave the boy one last hug, unknown to her -Y/N- slipped a note into her back pocket.
"I'm really going to miss you, Shawna."
"I'll miss you too, sugar."
__________
Uuuuhhh....yeah. Hopefully this works. I'm new to taking requests. Feel free to imagine the note, what would you write to Leshawna. She's just so cool and amazing and DESERVED TO FUCKING WIN!!!
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Text
Hophie Headcanons
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Starting With the Events AFTER One True King
now ik that in book 6 Sophie felt that being Dean of evil was unimportant to her, but I'd like to think that now that she's dating Hort and she's accepting his love for her that the two took a 6-month 'honeymoon' (not really one Sophie just wanted to do something with Hort for them to bond as lovers) before one day they burst into the school demanding for their jobs back.
Also on their vacation Sophie helped Hort cope and heal with the fact that he is no longer part man-wolf and they started doing workout routines together (Something Hort wanted to do so he could be strong and protect Sophie) and beauty routines (something Sophie wanted to do because she wants them looking young and evil forever)
Also Hort helped Sophie because she had a lot of nightmares about his 'death'
And because they have their old jobs back they're menaces to the students (I love Hort's snarky comments he always made throughout the series and I NEED that)
They have matching pajamas
Sophie got Hort frog pj's for his 17th birthday (he almost cried)
Sophie always asks for Hort's opinion on her outfits for each day
They always eat meals together, even if one is working late the other will bring the lunch/dinner to their office and they'll eat and talk for hours
Usually if they get into fights Hort is the first to apologize (even if it wasn't his fault) but sometimes Sophie will apologize and make him a cake
Hort writes bad poetry but Sophie secretly loves it
A lot of Hort's students flirt with Hort even though they know he's with Sophie and she gets jealous of it (this starts one of the fights that Sophie apologizes first)
Hort started to open up more to Sophie about his family and she sometimes talks about hers too
every year when they do Secret Santa's with their friends (Hester, Anadil, William, Bogden, Tedros, Agatha, Beatrix, Kiko) they always cheat to make sure that they get each other for Secret Santa's and always act surprised when they give each other the gifts (their friends are always suspicious of them)
Hort writes Sophie bad poetry that she pretends to hate but secretly loves
They go to balls as often as they could
Hort always makes Sophie her favourite breakfast in the mornings and she always makes his lunch, even if she does burn it sometimes, he still eats it
When Tagatha had children they were made the godparents
that also got Hort and Sophie thinking about kids
they send each other letters each class to tell the other how much they miss each other (their students are either disgusted or find it cute)
Sophie is a terrible singer, and Hort knows it, but he still loves hearing her sing
Hort will leave Sophie flowers in her office every morning and it will always be her favourite (roses)
Sophie secretly loves Hort's little comic of them as Bort and Lophie
Sophie calls Hort: her weasel, froggy, her prince, the beast, Horty, Hort, darling, sweetie
and if anyone tries to call him any of them (besides Hort) she'll curse them
Hort calls Sophie: my queen, Soph, my love, and Sophie
While Hort grades papers and Sophie's with him she'll doodle random things on his hand
Hort doesn't like parties, so whenever it's his birthday Sophie makes him his favourite breakfast and they celebrate it together alone
But for Sophie's birthday he always makes sure to get her a big birthday party, But Sophie always tells him that she'd be happy with something small with him
Sophie taught Hort how to french kiss
Some people still pick on Hort (especially the other teachers) and Sophie will always stand up for him
a lot of the teachers HATE Sophie's changes to the Evil school (which she had to redo after they took down her ideas but now they're a little less Sophie) and try to argue with her about it but Hort stands up for her and is always supportive of the ideas
Sometimes they'll cuddle for hours and not say anything and that's all they need
Hort proposed to Sophie when they turned 18 (it wasn't easy either there was so many interruptions)
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