#and learning to be better | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

romcommunist · 10 months

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"honeymoon phase" i am literally healthily insane and obsessed for the entire duration of the relationship. skill issue

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yarrowdraws · 5 months

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very late to the meme, it's been done before but. here. turn on the sound pls

#disco elysium #harry du bois #cop slide #slowly learning to use blender and after effects #i was like 'oh i could just send a ragdoll harry through the slide that would be easier!' no. thats way harder than animating him #i could have done better camera shake but i already spent waaaay too much time on this #animation #blender

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terriblepersongreatseamonster · 17 days

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Just a few of the comments from YouTube that amused me.

#watcher #watcher entertainment #the ghoul boys #ryan and shane #ryan bergara #shane madej #steven lim #youtube comments #hopefully they'll learn and get better #we're all human and all make mistakes but moat of us dont do it on this public of a stage

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newttxt · 14 days

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crisis of disbelief

#one piece #trafalgar law #zoro #luffy #‘what ship is this’ sure #lulaw? luzo? law…zo? or is it zolaw. none of these sound like words anymore #well i guess bc they aren’t. they aren’t real words #‘law and zoro never really saw gear 5’ yeah. law saw his giant head in the roof and zoro was basically dead #they felt That tho #and finally #‘i thought you were taking a much needed rest break after weekly comics’#yeah well. i need a new brush bc my old one kills my wrist and there is a STEEP learning curve for me ://#it’ll get easier right. it’ll look better right. RIGHT?!

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tippenfunkaport · 4 months

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You know, it would be amazing if Hollywood learned the right lesson from the success of Nimona. Something like "Hey, maybe don't throw out a nearly done movie as a tax write off" or "people want queer stories" or even "don't be afraid to take some storytelling risks and be original" but you just know they're going to come away with some absolutely batshit takeaway like, "next time delete all the evidence and burn it to the ground so the gays can't make us look bad!"

#sorry to be cynical on main but all I can think of is instead of watching this and being like wow we made a huge mistake here #disney is just going to be mad because of how foolish this made them look #bc corporate america always learns exactly the wrong lesson #honestly hope I'm wrong and this humbles them and they do better #but also I am a realist #anyway go nimona kick 'em in chip and dale's nuts #nimona #nd stevenson #netflix #disney #oscar nominations #oscar nominee #hollywood

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andthebeanstalk · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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wombywoo · 2 months

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retired 🩶

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #my art #listen this took me like two weeks so y'all better appreciate 🤌#johnny is the super active DIY father of the family #simon has made his way through all of the miss marple mysteries and has now set his sights on naval fiction #also growing his fringe out to hide the early onset baldness #johnny has gorgeous hair but we knew that #the dogs are called roger and wee albert--guess which is which #yes they all sleep in the same bed~#I guess I just need to see these two old and cranky and alive for whatever reason...#let them both burn in hell after a few good decades learning how to live beyond just surviving #god they probably make a banger pot roast....

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quixoticanarchy · 2 years

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Idc about taylor swift and I think all private jets should be cannibalized for scrap metal but in particular I don’t think singers and bands etc should have private jets. They should only have shitty tour buses in which incalculable drama and bad decisions go down

#also have we learned nothing from buddy holly. the right answer is always not to be in the plane #buses also just offer such a better environment for musicians to be unhinged #imagine george jones shooting holes in his bus walls but this time it’s a plane :/#sorry deeply niche reactions sdfhjkl. singers & bands should also stop contributing to ecocide obviously #skravler

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notquiteaghost · 10 months

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re: that fucking staff post. obviously death to algorithms, but i also wanna interrogate the wider underlying assumptions of their logic there cuz. is 'success' having lots of followers & lots of popular posts??? why is that the end goal of using this website. i don't open tumblr to get attention from strangers, i open tumblr to read funny jokes and interesting commentary and to see cool art. encouraging clout-chasing will only increase user engagement if you successfully get people literally addicted to the associated dopamine hit. what if we didn't have to do that!!! what if a website could be a place you went to on purpose because you had fun there!!!!

#yelling at clouds #you cannot be tiktok. we already have tiktok.#there is a limited number of people on this earth with smart phones and the free time to rot their brains online #your goal cannot be Endless Growth you stupid fucking capitalists #like sure the site is confusing at first. because you have to learn how to use it.#be better at explaining it do not fundamentally change it there is no such thing as universally intuitive design

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unpretty · 11 months

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society is spiraling and culture is a wasteland. i know this because i looked and most people prefer things that are fun and easy, making fun and easy things extremely popular. this is the first time that's ever happened, historically.

#original #why is every post about books and movies and music and food like this #also the posts are always about tiktok like it's a mystery why the most popular app's most popular posts are about popular interests #please learn to accept when you are simply out of step with popular culture which i know you are because you are on tumblr #i know everyone hated hipsters and their interests being more obscure than yours but at least they recognized that they were the outliers #'hipsters suck because they think their taste is sooo much better than everyone else smh'#'my tastes are extremely normal which is why i can say definitively that popular things must be popular due to a conspiracy of some kind'

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theophagie · 4 months

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I thought I was losing it but no, kh1 Sora's fast swimming animation really does change after you've been to Atlantica. It's a small detail, but also a cute and smart one 🥺

#edit nobody say anything i didn't realise that the dolphin kick ability extended to beyond atlantica ok i am dumb #and i didn't even think to read over its description twice. ok #but still!!! by lore he Did learn to swim better there so (*copium*)#kingdom hearts #video games #mytext #what i learned since making this post is that people don't read tags

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inkskinned · 7 months

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love when men cry about body hair bc "it's hygiene" and yet 15% of cis men leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all and an additional 35% only just wet their hands without using soap. that is nearly half of all men. that means statistically you have probably shaken hands with or been in direct contact with one of these people.

love when men say that women "only want money" when it turns out that even in equal-earning homes, women are actually adding caregiver burdens and housework from previous years, whereas men have been expanding leisure time and hobbies. in equal-earning households, men spend an average of 3.5 hours extra in leisure time per week, which is 182 hours per year - a little over a week of paid vacation time that the other partner does not receive. kinda sounds like he wants her money.

love that men have decided women are frail and weak and annoying when we scream in surprise but it turns out it's actually women who are more reliable in an emergency because men need to be convinced to actually take action and respond to the threat. like, actually, for-real: men experience such a strong sense of pride about their pre-supposed abilities that it gets them and their families killed. they are so used to dismissing women that it literally kills them.

love it. told my father this and he said there's lies, damned lies, and statistics. a year ago i tried to get him to evacuate the house during a flash flood. he ignored me and got injured. he has told me, laughing, that he never washes his hands. he has said in the last week that women are just happier when we're cooking or cleaning.

maybe i'm overly nostalgic. but it didn't used to feel so fucking bleak. it used to feel like at least a little shameful to consider women to be sheep. it just feels like the earth is round and we are still having conversations about it being flat - except these conversations are about the most obvious forms of patriarchy. like, we know about this stuff. we've known since well before the 50's.

recently andrew tate tried to justify cheating on his partner as being the "male prerogative." i don't know what the prerogative for the rest of us would be. just sitting at home, watching the slow erosion of our humanity.