#andie reads silently

[grassbreads]

Tell me how I, the gal with terminal "can't stop thinking about Tai Sui" disease, read hundreds of thousands of words of Mo Du over the course of months, starting right after I finished Tai Sui, yet it took me until right now in this instant to put together the Fei Du->Zhou Ying parallel

Like. Here's the favored son of a man who is incredibly powerful and morally bankrupt. He hates his dad and would be quite happy to commit patricide, should he get the opportunity, but he doesn't directly do so because it wouldn't suit his schemes. He has spent his entire life since his teenage years painstakingly putting together the chess pieces necessary to both destroy his dad and unravel the truth of a grand unknowable conspiracy that has haunted his entire life. He's a genius and the way his mind works is utterly incomprehensible to everyone else in the world, even those who know and love him best. The right kind of placid smile from him can be the most terrifying thing anybody has ever seen. He is willing to use himself up and toss himself out completely if it is the means to the final end of his schemes.

It's just that with Fei Du, the whole point of him is that he's not nearly so terrible as he thinks he is. He's not a psychopath. He's not cruel, regardless of how much empathy he may or may not naturally have. He's just spectacularly traumatized by his childhood. And the presence of Luo Wenzhou in his life both saves him from spiraling down into his original epic self-destructive plot and allows him to access his buried human emotions.

Then, 5 years later, Priest came back to revisit some of the same ideas and turn absolutely all of them up to eleven. She wrote a man who doesn't just think differently from others, but who perceives the world so wildly differently from anyone else that his experience of existence is utterly incomprehensible to his peers. She wrote a patricidal prince who doesn't just want to destroy his father and his company, then tear out the truth of a criminal conspiracy, but rather wants to destroy his father and his entire country, then tear out the truth of the sky itself. She wrote a man who genuinely doesn't give a single damn about anyone other than himself and his tiny tiny selection of loved ones. Who would destroy the entire world in a fit of vengeance and who uses his own willingness to kill innocents as leverage against others. She wrote a man who plans to achieve his goals by way of epic self destruction and does exactly that, leaving the main character's loss of him as the central beating tragedy in the otherwise best possible ending.

She also wrote a story in which, when Zhou Ying's closest and most loved person realizes the dark and scheming truth of him, rather than saying "I can fix him; I don't think he's really so bad," he says "yeah, this is my cousin and he's a terrible menace who tries to destroy the world sometimes. I love him more than anything."

You can absolutely see how Priest's interest in similar ideas informed both characters. It's just that Fei Chengyu didn't succeed in raising his perfect little sociopath successor, but Emperor Taiming and the demons of the impassible sea absolutely succeeded in Jokerizing Prince Zhuang. They just couldn't possibly anticipate the kind of monster that the demon of the east sea would become.

#ok technically this is a bit of a called shot for me about Fei Du #I'm still in the middle of book 5 #but like. he's not gonna die or go full evil. he's the love interest in a danmei #and the story up until this point has VERY clearly been about lwz showing Fei Du how human he still is #and pulling him back from the brink of something dark #it's an I can fix him romance #so it'd make no sense for the story to make a sudden 180. and I think priest knows better #mo du is about a good man trying to force himself into darkness and being saved #and about how he never realized how much he wanted that salvation. but he did want it. it drew him to lwz I think #tai sui. as others have said. is about the tragedy of trying to save someone that GENUINELY does not want to be saved #that shakes off your attempts to help them whenever possible and is genuinely good at doing so #idk man I just love fucked up little guys #tai sui #mo du #silent reading #fei du #zhou ying #prince zhuang #andie reads silently #also side note. but it was SO hard to decide which blog to put this on lol #it's part of my mo du liveblog. which goes on main #but also tai sui meta. which goes on morethanwonderful #augh. #long post #tai sui spoilers

[chirsu]

#Man... #And the... 'She hasn't been dead for 3 years. She died recently.' #she speaks #Yes I'm reading Mary's wikipage #andy don't look #here there be spoilers #silent hill

[peachesofteal]

The Pit

COD masterlist Part 1/2

Ghost/Soap/female reader 6.3k words - AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ MDNI, dub con, kidnapping, manipulative hurt/comfort, whump, the guys shave you, humiliation, forced orgasm, predator/prey, medical inaccuracies. Clothed males/naked female. The Pit by Silversun Pickups. Horror-ish. Misery inspired.

Winter in the mountains can be cruel. 

This is something you’ve always known, even as a child. You were raised with it. Chose to return to it after school, decided to make a go of it, of a life here, as an adult. You knew what you were getting yourself into, long cold winters that felt both bleak and promising, unblemished blankets of snow possessing the ability to be stunning, while also lethal. Winters were dangerous, silent killers that left corpses in their wake and no amount of lupine or paintbrushes, glacier fed lakes or springtime moose calves could make up for the hell that winter wrought. Winter brings most living things to the knife’s edge of survival, forcing most to bow beneath the weight of its fury, backs breaking with the burden of just existing in an environment that truly acts, and feels, inhospitable. 

Although, there are those who do more than survive the cold, violent stretch of winter.

There are predators who thrive. 

“You closin’?” Your coworker, the new one, asks from where she’s settled across the dark wood bar, two amber Budweiser bottles empty in front her idle hands, eyes wandering to guys posted up by the loneliest pool table in fifty square miles. 

“I am.” She casts the only window in the entire place a surreptitious glance, fingers peeling away at a label. It’s snowing, has been for hours, flakes fat and wet, fluffy enough that the density of the snow on the ground is light, but dangerous, as it hides the real risk underneath; packed snow sitting with a slick sheen of ice on top. 

“You still trying to make it over Fall River pass tonight?” You nod. 

“Yeah. Supposed to see my brother and his new place this weekend.” 

“Fall River? Is that even open right now?” Andy, a regular who lives a few streets over from you, chimes in, twisting an empty rocks glass in his fist. You pull the bottle of Jameson from the rail and tip it vertical, honey brown liquid sloshing like a wave until his glass is halfway full, and he gives you a flirty kind of smile, the same one he’s been giving you for a year now. Yeeesh.

“It is. I could go around, but it just takes too long. And it’s Friday. I’m not trying to be stuck on the highway with weekend traffic.” You complain, and they both commiserate your opinion. The traffic is brutal, especially in the winter. Driving in hazardous conditions is considered to be a talent more than an innate ability here, and people often overestimate their aptitude for it, causing crashes and delays that get the highway shut down for hours, or even days, at times. You shrug. “I’ve had my snow tires on for weeks. Might as well get some use out of them.” Andy snorts. 

“Like you haven’t been gettin’ good use out of them? First real snow was before Halloween this year.” You nod. He’s not wrong. You did get dumped on two weeks before the end of October, twenty-three inches piling up within two days, before half the area was even ready for it. You throw him a polite smile, one that you hope reads like ‘okay thanks for the concern, we’re done now’ and he sighs. “Well, drive safe.” 

Fall River pass, it turns out, is not open. It’s closed by the time you split off from the interstate and start the windy, switch-backed trek in your jeep, flashing orange and yellow lights dotting the top of a barricade just barely visible through the speckled snow flying by in your headlights. 

Fuck. You could have sworn the DOT website said it was open. You take a deep breath, quelling the anxiety that roils your stomach. Okay. Not the end of the world. There’s another road. A less maintained option, but… you’ll be fine. You’ve driven in worse. 

The other road, a sharp, narrow, desolate path that cuts through a large swath of unmanaged forest just outside the national park, is easy at first. You’ve been driving the same jeep for years, a 2007 two door Wrangler, and you know how it handles like the back of your hand. With snow tires, it could pretty much cut through anything, even unplowed, fire watch roads like this one. 

Which is why, after the first few miles, your nerves fully settle, and you allow yourself to relax a little bit behind the wheel, easing the jeep across the dips and slicks in the road as you cautiously build speed, snow falling fast through night, growing thicker the higher you travel into wilderness territory, and the farther you left modern civilization behind. 

An hour creeps by, and then two. Long enough that you’ve now realized you’re the only one using this road, fresh snow blanketing the woods around you, topography and vegetation starting to change as you encroach on what you assume must be eleven thousand feet. You’ve seen this road on google maps once, or twice maybe, having noted it for future travel just in case of a situation like this. It runs perpendicular to Fall River, and eventually meets another, one that must be similar, on the other side of the range. The secondary road is one that takes you along the ridge, and then down, you’re pretty sure, although you can’t be one hundred percent certain, because you lost cell reception before you even turned off from Fall River.

Still, won’t hurt to check and see if you have this area downloaded. 

You pull your phone from the center console, thumbing at the screen, allowing your eyes to linger too long without looking back up through the windshield. No one else is out here. It’s not like you need to worry about oncoming traffic. The little SOS insignia blinks at the top corner, and you tap on the map icon, hoping it will bring up your geo location so you can glance at the satellite image of the area. 

You’re so fixated watching the little circle of death try to load, that by the time you look up and see the tree laying across the road, it’s far too late. You do the first thing you were always taught not to do in winter conditions, and slam on the brake, shoving the pedal to floor, heart rate sky rocketing as you panic and lose total control of the jeep. You spin, shoulders and chest jamming against the seatbelt, headlights flashing off into the woods, illuminating an endlessly dark web of trees, bark and branch scratching across the paint as you careen off the road, tipping too precariously onto two wheels and then rolling. 

Time, your life, stands completely still for a moment. You see every individual fiber of the pine needles, every uniquely designed snowflake, every single droplet of blood that floats away from your face and through midair as you crash through the forest, your grasp on consciousness slipping farther and farther away, the jeep finally coming to a stop on its side, your head cracked against the driver’s window, stars and streaks spawning out across your vision, headlights finally blinking out completely, leaving you alone in the dark. Your head spins like you’re still rolling, and the only sound in the dead silent snow is your harsh breathing, frantic terror bubbling up through your throat as pain surges through your body. 

It's freezing, but you feel surprisingly warm. 

You’re going to die out here. No one knows you took this road, you don’t have service, by the time they find you, it’ll be too late. You’ll be a bled out, frozen corpse, long gone and- 

You lose your train of thought quickly. Everything starts to fracture, fissures forming in your consciousness, part of you already losing the battle to the inevitable, darkness pulling over your eyes like a knit hat, lungs heaving just a little harder with each breath. 

You could just close your eyes. Just for a moment. 

Light sweeps across the ground, flashing across your face. You think, if you were truly with it, in your right mind, you’d think it was too bright. You’d say it was blinding. 

But you can’t formulate anything of the sort, mind too busy slipping away, falling into an inky black depth, just barely on the verge when you feel a gloved hand on your skin, the lilt of an accent on the wind. 

Sleep. 

You’re drifting. Falling through a stardusted, molasses filled haze, your mind ebbs and flows with consciousness; soft and warm feelings contrasted with sharp pain that bites through your body as if it’s slowly trying to eat you, chipping away piece by piece.

There are words, voices. There are hands too, fingers walking across your skin, limbs being moved, arranged, always with pain that’s followed by a hushed whisper of apology, a confusing sentiment in the dark. Your eyes won’t open. Your mouth won’t work. Your head is stuffed with cotton, wispy strands of connections that can’t quite get there, scrounging along the walls of your skull, trying to meet in the middle. You’re drowning, sinking to the bottom of a macabre pool, the one that’s infected your synapses and kept you just inside the shelter of delirium.

You try to call for help, but you can’t.

You try to swim to the surface, but the grisly black of your mind is never ending.

You’re dying, the tiny sliver of rational thought assures. Or you’re already dead.

Despair swells, and if you could feel your face, you’d think you were crying, lost to the sweeping desolation of your pain. It steals your breathe. Your sense. Everything becomes secondary to the obliterating agony that you feel. 

Something touches your cheek. Your eyes fight to open, straining against the heaviness that weighs on them, just barely blinking wide enough to let some light in, your vision fuzzily trying to focus.

Wood beams come into view. A ceiling? Where-

You try to turn your head but an electric shock rattles through your brain, forcing you to slam your eyes shut again, world spinning on an uneven axis as something on the edge of your sight shifts. A monster. A man?

Something is said, whispered, and then everything fades away, your mind and body slipping beneath the waves of darkness.

The next time you surface, you manage to cling to consciousness long enough to take stock of your surroundings, realizing you’re tucked into a soft, warm bed almost immediately, something hot near your feet, pillows fluffed beneath you. A hand stitched quilt is spread across the top of copious other blankets and sheets, and your fingertips scratch against the fabric. Flannel.

You’re also awake long enough to truly experience the pain you’re in.

One thousand tiny knives rattle around in your skull, slicing into the soft matter of your brain, tearing you apart piece by piece, everything in you unmoored and off balance. Searing pain radiates up your leg, through your arm and wrist to your head and neck, and when your instinct urges you to try to move, your body screams in protest, the pain so intense that you cry out.

That’s when you see him.

A man steps towards you from the edge of your peripheral, and you freeze in terror.

“Shhh. We’re not goin’ hurt ye. Ye had a terrible accident. Pure luck we found ye when we did, dove. Ye would’ve died out there.” He coos in an accent, inching closer, and you manage to get a better look at him, recognition failing immediately. An accident? An accident… memories come flooding back, broken clips of the jeep spinning, rolling, the woods, the fear. Who is he? Where are you? Brilliant blue eyes look down at you with concern, handsome face tweaked into worry, furrow in his brow partially covered by the long strands of an overgrown mohawk. He’s pretty. “Can ye follow my finger?” He presents one in front of your nose, but it splits into two, and then three, just the attempt to focus enough to make your head throb, and a whimper escapes from your throat. “I know, I know.” There’s a ceramic mug in his hand, and he carefully lifts it to your lips, encouraging you as he tips it back, warm, sweet liquid washing down your throat. You can’t even move your arms to push him away, and when he seems to be satisfied, his thumb wipes the corner of your mouth. “Good love. Well done.” You feel woozy all of the sudden, maybe even a little nauseous, and you think you could be hallucinating when another man appears at the foot of the bed, handsome, but in a rugged way, watching you with honeyed brown eyes, the broadest, biggest thing you’ve ever seen.

“Those bones need setting.” He says, and the pretty one grimaces, fingertips trailing along your cheek.

“Maybe tomorrow. I’m still worried about the concussion.” His thumb cards across your brow.

“It’s been three days, Johnny. Can’t put it off too much longer.” Three days? Your brain latches onto the time. Three days of what? Since when? You’re starting to fade, trying to focus on what they’re saying but losing the battle horrendously when the blankets shift, warmth tucking down around your waist and shoulders, unable to react or even speak when they both press a kiss to your forehead, affectionate and longing touch that startles you until you’re losing the battle to sleep.

It's snowing.

You don’t have to see to know. There’s something about how it hangs in the air, how the world sounds during a snowfall that blankets everything: houses, trees, mountains… your mind.

You love the snow. Even as a child, winter was your favorite. Winter brought you a sense of calm, of peace. It’s what brought you back here, kept you here, even amidst the perils. The feeling of a forest, lying still beneath the soft spun expanse of white, the crisp smell of the air the morning of a big snow, the eternal quiet that exists in the night when everything is dampened by the weight of a million, billion, uniquely crystalized webs of frozen water.

This snow feels different. It doesn’t feel like a velvety white, candy-coated dream world; but a nightmare… one filled with pain, anxiety. Where are you? What’s happened? 

And why do you hurt so fucking bad? 

“You’re awake.” A deep voice says from your side, and you flinch on instinct, immediately wishing you hadn’t as lightning sharp pain zings through you, your voice breaking with a cry. “Easy.” He cautions, and your head stops swimming long enough for you to realize it’s the brown eyed man, the bigger one. He’s sitting in a chair that looks far too small for his width, watching you with an intensity that makes you feel exposed.

“Where… am I?” You manage to choke out through stiff lips, your head spinning and the world tilting at the same time. It sours your stomach, more than you thought possible, and you try to swallow the burn of bile that’s racing up your throat.

“Are you going to be sick?” He strokes your face, the touch nearly sweet, but confusing, and you hold your tongue, unsure. He sighs, expression shifting into disapproval, and then a frown. “Tell me.”

“N-no, I don’t-“ You can’t even finish your denial before your stomach is heaving and he’s springing into action, shifting you onto your side where a clean bucket sits right next to the bed. You wail in misery, pain shooting through your leg and arm, your ribs, bile and spit leaking from your mouth.

“It’s alright, that’s it.” A hand soothes up and down your back as you dry heave, sputtering on nothing, tears dripping to the wooden floorboards with a splash.

“Nnrgh-“

“I know, I know. Poor thing.” He coos, and it sounds… endearing, so sweet yet… frightening, like the poison of a predatory, a pretty display meant to draw you in before it snaps a set of jaws shut around your face.

Somewhere, nestled inside the last shards of your sanity, an alarm bell whistles, but the intensity of your pain quickly drowns it out, and you cry aloud.

“Hurts.” He rolls you back to your original position, arranging you like a doll. “It hurts.”

“I know it does, sweet girl, I know. We’re going to fix it.” A cloth dabs at your forehead and then down to clean your mouth, just as the man with the mohawk appears on the bed, one knee down, leaning over you, worry rife in his features.

“Poor baby. Were ye sick again?” Again? You blink up at him. What is going on? He presses a glass to your lips, urging you to drink, and then pulling it away after you’ve had a few sips with a gentle “not too much.”

“Who are you?” The water is cold, refreshing, but a ting acidic, and you wonder if it’s well water, maybe?

“I’m Johnny.” He’s setting up something beside you, organizing it, but you can’t turn your head to look, and can’t quite catch it from your peripheral. “An’ this is Simon. Or Si, but ye probably willnae be callin’ him that quite yet.” Quite yet? What? Did they find you? Did they rescue you? Why can’t you remember? 

“What happened.” You try again, gritting your teeth.

“Ye had an accident, remember? We talked about it yesterday. Ye rolled off the road, ended up nearly down the mountain, in the thick of the trees. Ye’re lucky the one didnae impale ye.” Impale?

“And you found me?” You're starting to feel tired again, all the sudden, woozy and weird, exhaustion pulling at your limbs. Shouldn't you be in a hospital? Why haven't they taken you to a doctor?

“Aye, we did. Pulled ye out, brought ye home.” Home?

“You don’t have to worry.” Simon, the bigger one, tells you. “We’re going to take care of you.” Take care of who? Everything is foggy, clouded, and you try to shake your head in confusion.

“I don’t… why-“

“Storm is pretty bad. One of those, once in a lifetime types. Pass is closed.” You close your eyes. Of course. The pass is closed. You guess you’re lucky. They could have left you to die, and you could have never been found. You could have frozen to death. Bled out.

“Thank… thank you.” Johnny hums, and then you ripple in shock as he leans forward and brushes his lips against your mouth in a kiss. This… this is not normal? Are Scottish people just… more affectionate? 

“Want ye to know, if we didnae have to do this, we woudnae.” What?

“Do what?” Simon casts you a mournful glance, rising from the chair. He’s got piece of leather in his hand, like a cut from a belt, and your eyes dart between them, fear freezing solid inside your pores. Do what?

“Bite down on this, precious.” Simon instructs, placing the swatch against your bottom lip, and you jerk away in protest, pain burning through your body.

“Do what?” You try to sound strong, demanding, but it comes out a little less than timid, and he gives you a sad smile.

“Your femur is broken.” A warm hand rests on your leg, over the covers, and you try to click the pieces together. “And I suspect your radius is, too. We need to set them.”

Oh. Oh no. 

“N-no, no, you… you ca-can’t.” You stutter. They can’t. A doctor should be doing that, shouldn’t they? Johnny hovers over you, placing his palm on your belly, stroking upwards to the middle of your chest, the other holding firm across your collarbone. His touch is gentle, but strong, and his thumb rubs in a cautious motion against your skin, lightly grazing the underside of your breast. It feels weird, and wrong… intimate in a way that makes you shiver. “Please. Please, please… don’t-“

“It’s alright.” He shushes you, and the pressure increases against your body as Simon wedges a thick finger between your teeth, slipping the worn leather in your mouth, bracing around your wrist, his other hand holding your elbow. You gasp for air, adrenaline fueled by pain and fear coursing through you, and Johnny coos, telling you ye’ll be alright, that ye’re with them now, and they’ll take such good care of ye. 

“Take a deep breath.” Simon urges, and you stare at him, wide eyed, pulse thundering in your ears.

“Ye’ll probably pass out, bonnie. We’ll get the second one done while ye’re down, and I already gave ye somethin’ for the pain.” He assures, like it’s supposed to relieve you, and your nostrils flare as something tightens against your arm. Simon’s grip. 

This can’t be happening. This has to be a nightmare. How can this happen? No, nononono-

There’s a crack. A crunch. Burning, obliterating torture rockets up your arm, exploding inside you like a shot. You scream and bite down at the same time, raw misery trying to claw it’s way out of your throat. You think you’re crying, hallucinating from the pain, having a heart attack, fucking dying, all at once. It hurts, it hurts so bad, stop, please-

“We’re sorry, we’re sorry.” Simon soothes, thumb wiping your cheek, but you can hardly hear him, your brain starting to sever itself from reality, floating away as you slip inside the dark tomb of your mind, losing yourself to the fog as they both stare down at you, sickeningly saccharine concern layered overtop the faces of wolves, predators licking their maws in preparation for a meal.

You sleep and wake in a haze.

You sleep. Your dreams are torments, visions of being chased through the mountains by monsters, being pinned to the ground, teeth tearing into your throat with no preamble, or nightmares of drowning, being swallowed by the ocean, lungs sputtering with concrete laden sea water.

You wake. Your vision blurs, mind scrambled by pain, vaguely aware of being moved, carried to the bathroom, held upright over a toilet, gentle touch soothing up and down your back, heavy palm cupping curve of your skull when your head is tipped back and something is dribbled past your lips. You blink blearily with stone weighted lids, taking in the room bit by bit, the wrought iron bed frame, crackling flames sparking in a fireplace, mountain of pillows sagging with the imprint of your body. Your limbs are wrapped and unwrapped, immobilized, and shifted, and the pain is enough to make you gasp for air, tipping you over into the decaying depths of unconsciousness again and again.

You sleep. Restless, chilled. Ice spreads from the nerves in the tip of your nose to your brain, your fingers, and you try to burrow it deeper, seeking the comfort of the pillows, but finding warm skin and muscle instead. In your sleep, it’s lovely. It’s comforting. Even when you’re rolled to your side, something sticking under your tongue, you chase the heady thick heat that seems to roll off the limbs around you.

You wake. There are voices, deep and rumbling, bouncing through the room. Warm water dabbing down your neck, your belly, your legs. You’re too hot, uncomfortable and smothered until you hear a sharp pitched snarl accompanied by a yank, and then there’s a void of emptiness around you.

You sleep.

You wake. The pain starts to change, melting into something that’s consistent, throbbing, but a little less sharp, unless you move, and then it shrieks through your nerves like an electrical shock, vibrating your jaw shut.

You sleep.

You wake. They’re there. Simon is dabbing a cool washcloth across your forehead. You try to flex away on instinct, but firm hands stop you, holding you in place.

“Hey there, dove.” Johnny whispers, smiling. It’s a shy kind of smile, sweet, and the world spins. You grapple with reality, trying to remind yourself where you are, what happened. The fire snaps and pops behind Simon, who stands at his side, massive hand on his shoulder. “Made ye some breakfast. Think ye can eat somethin’?” Breakfast? A steaming bowl of oats sits cradled in his hand, spoon at the ready. Nausea roars, enflamed by the pain in your bones, and you shake your head. “Ye need to eat. Been givin’ ye soup for the past few days, but ye need more carbs.”

“I- I don’t understand.” You try to explain your confusion, hundreds of questions brewing on your tongue, trying to spill out.

“You’ve been in and out consciousness for the last week.” Simon explains, and your eyes widen.

“What?” Panic knots, twisting you up tight, heart fluttering in your chest.

“We had to sedate you. Needed to keep you still through the first part of the healing process.”

“You… you drugged me?” You stammer, and Simon smiles, but it’s not sweet like Johnny’s. It’s severe. It’s dangerous.

“Soft calluses form around fractures, after they’ve been set.” He sits down on the other side of the bed, across your hips from Johnny. “Your breaks aren’t in casts, so we needed to minimize your movement until the calluses could strengthen.”

“Ye willnae be able to walk on the leg, or lift anything with that arm, but we’ll help ye.” Johnny assures. “We’ll be here for ye, as ye get better.” The words don’t compute, and you look at both of their faces, sweeping back and forth, blue eyes to brown, brown to blue, until the only thing that you can think of blurts out of your mouth:

“Where’s my phone?” There’s a flash of discontent in Johnny’s features, but it’s quickly smoothed away, and you wonder if it even there in the first place.

“I imagine it’s somewhere near where your jeep rolled. We weren’t exactly concerned with finding it, considering we were trying to save your life.” Simon’s hands flex in the sheets, and then relax, serious look on his face, and guilt swamps you. Right. They saved your life. You could have died. And the pass is closed. Maybe this is all… as normal as it can be, given the situation. Calm down. 

Still… 

Didn’t Johnny kiss you? 

The spoon clinks against the bowl, jolting you back to the moment, eyeing the scoop of oats as it drifts closer to your mouth, lips parting on instinct.

The first bite is difficult, an insipid, unsavory lump sliding down into your stomach, toothy grin stretching across Johnny’s face as you swallow. The second bite is easier. So is the third, and you manage a few more after that until you start to feel wooly, head fuzzy and stomach sick. “I can’t.” You bleat, and he nods sympathetically.

“Alright, ye did good.” Sleep tugs, insistent again, strong surge of fog pulling at your eyes, and you yawn.

“Tired?” Simon’s already moving, hovering, patiently adjusting your pillows and lazily urging you into them. “You should rest.” You’re too weak, too miserable to argue, so you let yourself fade to black, easily falling back into the webbed slush of sleep.

You drift in and out for days after that. A bright spot of consciousness here and there before it dissipates and you fall into oblivion, and you find yourself embracing it as often as possible, trying to escape into yourself, away from wooden beams and potential predators that flank you.

You’re content to let it stay that way, hiding away behind closed lids for as long as possible, until the morning you feel the washcloth.

“Sh-sh-shhh.” Johnny hums when you garble out a distressed question, tipping a glass to your mouth. Cold liquid rushes across your tongue, and you have no choice but to swallow, confusion webbing across your thoughts. Simon has the blankets pulled away, chilled air nipping and your skin, and you moan. It’s strange, like you’re exposed, half floating like you’re high, and half spiraling through your pain.

“It’s okay, we’ve got you.” They’re repositioning you, arms and legs like a little doll, and you frown. “Jus’ need to get you clean.” Clean? The washcloth coasts across your neck and down to your chest, warm water soaking a trail down your breasts. You’re naked, fully, a hot palm against your hip, skin on skin contact registering as you blink fuzzily, watching the way Johnny focuses on you, concentration shining in his stunning blue eyes.

Water sloshes. Squeezing and dripping, and then the warm, nearly hot cloth is being pressed against you, stroking over your nipples, washing the underside of your breasts. It feels nice, and you whine a little when it pulls away. Simon chuckles.

“Do ye like that?” Johnny coos, reapplying the cloth to your belly. “Does that feel good?” Does it? Is it supposed to? Your vision doubles then realigns, and you stare at the underside of Simon’s jaw, mesmerized by the scar on his chin, the width of his neck. He readjusts you, again, slowly moving your knees apart, spreading your legs, and heat climbs through your bones to your cheeks.

You’re naked. They’re fully clothed. 

“We’re goin’ clean this up a bit.” Simon murmurs, a thick finger tracing along your slit, through the soft curls between your legs, and you balk. Clean what? How?

“My… my-“ you can’t even get the words out, too embarrassed, and he nods, sliver flash of a razor twinkling in his hand. The air in your chest sputters.

“Your hair.” Johnny works the washcloth back and forth, water dripping down your skin to the towel that’s been placed under your hips, you can only lay there in mortification when you feel yourself getting wet, tepid arousal roaring to life between your legs. “If you’re a good girl for us,” Simon continues, spraying a big glob of shaving cream into Johnny’s palm, “we’ll give you a treat afterwards. How’s that sound?”

“A treat?”  You squeak, and then whimper, Johnny’s fingers creeping down your slit, rubbing the cream across your pubis and labia, heel brushing against your clit. You make a noise of a protest, but it falls on deaf ears.

“Ye’re alright.” He coos, bumping against the swollen bud again, and you try to stop the moan that builds in your chest with no success, slamming your eyes shut and trying to disappear into the pillows. “It’s natural, dove. Ye dinnae need to feel embarrassed.” He leans forward, slotting his mouth against yours, lips soft and fragrant in a pillowy sweet kiss that lasts too long, his eyes blissfully closed in front of your almost crossed ones. 

“Please…” you whisper, but you’re not sure what you’re asking for, and Johnny coos at you, bending at the waist to get a better vantage point between your legs. You shake your head, eyes wide with disbelief, with fear, your mind trying to catch up, trying to rationalize what’s happening at the same time as your body is betraying you, slicking the cream that’s lathered between your thighs, clit pulsing with desperate need.

“I- I don’t want you to… shave me.” You whisper. You don’t want them to touch you… there, and the panic that’s pulsing between your ears continues to rise as your protests go unnoticed. Just saying it out loud makes you want to die of embarrassment, and Simon clucks.

“We have to take care of you, sweet girl.” Simon grips your thigh, fingers pressing into flesh, and the cool blade of the razor moves against the grain with a flick of his wrist, drawing back to a bucket for a rinse before a repeat, breath frozen in your chest as he slowly eliminates the curls of your pubic hair. “It will be easier to do that, to see what you need without all this.” He hums, the smile of a wolf coy on his face. “Stay nice and still for us.” They work in tandem, perfectly synchronized, and your unwanted arousal starts to overpower the pain that’s radiating from your broken bones. It’s been so, so long since you’ve been touched by anyone, and your body does not care that you didn’t want this, or agree to it, too eager to be satisfied, to be touched in anyway it can get, and it gets worse, more intense the longer it goes on, the precise movements of their hands, the slow and methodical approach to your cunt. “Almost done.” Simon tells you, and the side of his finger passes over your clit unintentionally, and you whine. “I know, I know. You’re bein’ so good. Such a good girl.” Your good hand is shaking, gripping the sheets, and when he finishes, Johnny wipes you down with a clean cloth, passing over your clit again and again, electric shocks sparking in your belly. You’re paralyzed, helpless, and yet… soaked. Desperate. The warring emotions tear at you, shame and fear and desire rendering you speechless.

“I think ye need some relief, dove.” Johnny hums, looking from your pussy to Simon, both of them tilting their heads to stare between your legs. “Poor thing is so swollen, Si.”

“Do you want to touch her, Johnny? Give her a reward?” Simon asks him, so sweetly, and Johnny shimmies down to be eye level with your pussy, tongue darting out to lick his lips.

Half of you screams no. Half of you shouts yes.

All you can do is watch, helplessly, as they settle themselves between your legs, Simon over Johnny’s shoulder, tempering his frenzied excitement with assured patience. 

“Will ye show me how?” He’s eager, and you frown, confused.

“Johnny’s never made a girl come before,” Simon tells you gently. “You’ll be his first.” Oh my god. “Will you help him? Tell him what feels good?” Your brain melts. You don’t know what to say, mouth half open, staring at the both of them, and after a few seconds, Simon sighs like he’s exasperated with you, before ducking back down next to Johnny and murmuring softly to him, probing along your cunt, finger dipping into your hole, swirling in the wetness gathered there and then moving up to your slit. You gasp, eyes nearly rolling back in your head.

“She likes that.” Johnny groans, breath blowing over your exposed flesh, and Simon takes his hand, thumb over thumb, guiding him in small circles around your clit.

 “Nice an’ slow at first, when you’re rubbin’ her clit. Feel how hard it is?” He instructs, pressing a kiss to the side of Johnny’s head, and he nods enthusiastically, looking up at Simon with wide, puppy dog eyes, sappy and saturated with love. It’s sweet, and affectionate, like they’re the only ones in the room, in the world… and you’re intruding on a private moment between these two men and your body. Like you’re a bystander. Or a doll. It’s confusing, your brain trying to sort everything that’s happening into neat little boxes that keep overflowing or falling apart, fracturing under the weight of your helplessness, the shock and fear that’s nearly made you dizzy. “See how her little hole is clenchin’ like that? It’s ‘cause she’s empty, needs to be filled up. When she comes, she’ll get real tight.” He explains, your body enflaming in mortified heat. They’re pushing you closer and closer to an orgasm, and Simon increases the speed as your hips jolt.

“Fuck.” You hiss.

“That’s it.” Simon coaches. “Are you close, sweet girl? Gonna come for us?” You shake your head, but even if you wanted to close your legs, you couldn’t. You’re trapped, lost in a sea of wild waves that break directly over your head, one after another until you’re drowning, gasping, muscles so tight they burn, pain in your arm and leg a secondary concern behind the pressure in your belly, the zap of your clit as they drag you too easily to the bottom, before sending you breaking through the surface.

You come with a distressed moan, hips jerking, and then a raspy plea for them to stop, telling them it’s too much, you’re too sensitive, to which Simon wraps his hand around Johnny’s wrist and pulls his hand away.

“We can’t overwhelm her just yet. Gotta wait until she’s healed up, hm?” He murmurs, reaching for the cloth. You blink at the ceiling, drifting, floating away, little boxes in your mind broken up into gnarled pieces that don’t make sense.

What just happened?

You stay silent, blank, as they settle you, cloth cleaning between your legs, blankets being fussed with around your body, pillows plumped. Simon curls some of your unruly hair behind your ear, swooping down until the breadth of his body blocks out all the light in the room, lips brushing over your ear. “What a good girl you are, dove. Did so well, letting Johnny give you an orgasm. So sweet for him.” He tucks you in a little tighter, and Johnny ducks around him, kissing you gently, like you’re made of glass, thrilled smile tugging at his cheeks, unfettered joy the last thing you see before your eyes slip shut.

The next time you wake, Johnny is in bed with you. It’s dark, a flickering orange glow casting shadow across the room, and you startle at the weight of his arm stretched across your chest, cradling you close, half curled around you like a cat. You turn, face to face, his mouth slightly agape, breath blowing over your cheek. You can’t get enough leverage on one leg to slide out from under him, and when you squirm, he only tightens his grip, pinning you to the bed. You’re overheated, and when you peek over his shoulder to get a look at the fire, you see Simon instead, sitting upright in a chair, fully awake, watching you. White hot fear shocks your system, forcing your eyes down in disbelief, surprise, his chair creaking in the night. Your breath stops in your chest, and then there’s a hand smoothing over your forehead, as he leans past you to brush his lips against Johnny’s, and then rough stubble presses against your cheek with a jagged whisper.

“Sweet dreams, little dove.”

#peaches writes #dub con #ghost x soap x reader #soap x ghost x reader #ghoap x reader #john soap mactavish #ghost x reader x soap #simon riley #simon riley x reader #john soap mactavish x reader #Ghoap #soap x reader

[babyjakes]

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

event | kinkmas 2023

prompt | sex shop

pairing | sex shop owner!andy barber x innocent!reader

warnings | age gap (reader sees andy as a total dilf.) reader is very innocent and also so scared to be there (understandably.) soft!andy, comforting vibes, he talks her through everything. humiliation kink is strong in this one. no real smut, just suggestive themes (sex shop, toys, talks of solo and guided masturbation.)

word count | 987

an | this little story is dedicated to andy's #1 girl, @worksby-d 🥺 dest i super hope you enjoy our favorite dilf here!! i tried to make him the big warm teddy bear we know and love, with a little hint of naughtiness shining through at the end hehe <3 happy holidays to you friend!!

imagine going to a sex shop for the very first time, aalllll by yourself, and meeting a very handsome dilf who helps you pick out your very first big girl toy 😏

parking as far away as possible (it’s at the end of a little strip mall in a tiny little town you’ve never been to before, you wanted to make sure you wouldn’t bump into anyone you knew!) spending like 10 minutes just sitting in your car hyping yourself up, you’re so nervous but you’ve wanted to do this for so long 🥺

eventually you build up your courage and make your way up the parking lot, to the front door of the place. a little silvery bell rings as you enter. you’re surprised at how clean and neat the place is. you weren’t sure what to expect, but this is better than you had been hoping. it’s not too big, a single large room with a counter in the middle. at first glance, you're alone, no other customers or employees in sight

the store has different sections with hanging signs directing you where to go. you can feel heat rising in your cheeks as you pass the racks of lingerie and intimates. just as you make it over to the toys for her section, you hear something from across the little shop. looking over, you see someone has entered through a doorway in the back. a man, but you don’t get too long of a look. your eyes quickly drop to the ground as you feel your embarrassment worsening

please don’t come over here. please don’t come over here. please don’t-

your silent prayers are ignored as footsteps approach. you take a step back from the wall of products, forcing yourself to look up at the stranger. your jaw almost drops at the sight of him, oh god, you’re thinking to yourself, why is he hot 😭

there andy stands in all of his glory, the epitome of dilfy deliciousness with his worn navy t-shirt and scruffy beard. scratching his head a bit awkwardly, he greets you, “hey, sorry. didn’t meant to startle you. can i help you find anything?”

your heart’s pounding in your throat as you look around stupidly before your eyes return to the absolute unit of a man before you. you blink like a deer in the headlights. oh my god. he works here, you’re a little slow to put things together

andy sees your surprise, letting out a gentle chuckle. “i’m the owner,” he explains. “you okay, honey? you look like you’ve seen a ghost”

a part of you knows this is an extremely sketchy situation. you’re alone in a sex shop with a dude probably twice your age (who apparently owns the place), out in a town you can’t remember the name of, with nothing to defend yourself except your two bare hands (which are now shaking)

but there’s something about the man before you that you just find so… warm? disarming? (…attractive? 😳) the gentle smile on his face, the way he softens his voice when he senses your nervousness...

you’re a little ball of conflicting feelings, half nerves and half head-over-heels for this unknown man. again, you blink, unable to find your voice to respond

“you’re alright, just take it easy,” he tries to help you relax. “this your first time in a place like this?” all you can manage is a nod. he gives you an understanding smile, “that’s perfectly fine. i’m here to help. can you tell me what you’re looking for, sweetheart?”

your eyes glance quickly back at the wall of toys in front of you before returning to him. he must see the increasing humiliation on your face. “u-um…” you’re finally able to stutter, “i-i don’t… i’m not… i guess i'm…”

he’s so patient and attentive it’s only making the butterflies in your tummy worse 😭 “not sure where to start?” he finishes for you. when you nod, he hums thoughtfully, “that’s okay, honey. do you have anything already that you like? is this for you to use on your own?"

you grit your teeth, nodding through the waves of embarrassment. “d-don’t have anything, sir. looking for something to start out with”

“i see,” he nods, looking over the selection on the wall before the two of you. “a bullet is a great beginner toy. simple, quiet, different levels of intensity to fit your needs. do you like clitoral stimulation?”

you have to fight yourself to keep from rubbing your thighs together right then and there 😩 something about the way he’s talking you through everything is sooo 🥲🥲 a feeling of dread hits as you realize you’re already getting wet

you force out a nod. he looks at a few options before picking out a small, discreet box. offering it to you, he explains, “this one’s my favorite. it’s nice and smooth, hard to hurt yourself with. rechargeable, medical-grade silicon. six levels of intensity. and the pink matches your nails,” he says sweetly, nodding at the shiny polish on the tips of your fingers

you clumsily accept the box, looking it over briefly. “there are instructions on the inside. the internet can be helpful too,” he suggests. the burning in your tummy worsens as he sees right through you, sniffing your complete innocence and inexperience with ease

“o-okay. this looks good. thank you,” you agree

“of course,” he nods with a sheepish smile. “once you get comfortable with that, we can work you up to something more sophisticated” you never implied that you’d be returning to him, but now that he’s said it, you know you couldn’t refuse. “and if you have any trouble, you can always come see me. i got a room in the back, we can take some time and find what works for you”

i might have to write that follow-up visit someday this is making me 🫠🫠

#eun's writing #kinkmas 2023 #andy barber #andy barber smut #andy barber fanfiction #andy barber headcanon #andy barber drabble #andy barber blurb #andy barber imagine #andy barber x you #andy barber x reader #andy barber x y/n #defending jacob #defending jacob fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans smut

[navybrat817]

The Silent Treatment

Pairing: Dark!Andy Barber x Female Reader

Summary: You attempt to give Andy the silent treatment during dinner.

Word Count: Almost 500

Warnings: Implied NONCON/DUBCON, implied kidnapping, delusion, Andy Barber (he's a warning, okay?).

A/N: The Basement Spouses Writing Challenge Week 4! Character: Andy Barber. Length: 250-500 words. Prompt: "You think I care about you? Cute." ❤️ Written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @saradika . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

You made no attempt to eat your dinner as you sat at the table with Andy. You also hadn’t spoken a word to him since he got home. He warned you before he left for the day that he’d be home late, but you were still in a mood the moment he walked through the door. You greeted him with a kiss as expected, but you didn’t extend any additional warmth.

What had he done to deserve it?

Andy took a bite of his food with a hum of dissatisfaction. “I thought takeout would’ve been a good idea since I had to work so late, but this is kind of terrible,” he teased, looking to you for a smile that you didn’t give him.

Your silence was the most eloquent reply you could provide.

Clearing his throat, he pushed some of the food around on his plate. “Did you have a good day?”

You replied with a shrug before you stared off at the wall behind him. It was the first time you noticed that the floral painting he had hung up was slightly crooked. It was fitting considering he tried to put on a front of perfection, but something was off.

His sigh brought your attention back to him, watching wordlessly as he ran his fingers along his beard. “Honey, I’m trying, but you have to meet me halfway.”

Lifting your chin in defiance, you watched his blue eyes flash as you slowly shook your head. You weren’t in the mood to be nice today. You were tired.

“So, that’s it? You’re giving me the silent treatment? That isn’t how our relationship is going to work. You-”

“Our ‘relationship’? There is no relationship, Andy,” you finally spoke, bitterly laughing at his stricken expression. “What, you think I want to be here? You think I care about you? Cute.”

You flinched when his fork scraped his plate, his jaw tight as he pushed his chair back. You should’ve stayed quiet. Why had you opened your mouth? “I knew I let you out of the basement too early,” he said more to himself than to you. “That’s my fault.”

“Andy, please,” you whispered as he rounded the table to grip your arm. The plasticware and plate wouldn’t do any damage if you fought. He never left anything sharp around you. “Don’t send me back down there.”

“You haven’t learned yet,” he said, your body trembling when he kissed the top of your head. “But don’t worry. You will.”

You tried to apologize as he dragged you back down to the basement. Just as you had given him the silent treatment, he ignored your pleas as he pushed you into the dingy mattress and took what he wanted. Later he’d remind you that he chose you to be his perfect wife and he’d eventually let you back upstairs to try again.

Until then, he’d keep you in the prison he created until you learned to love him.

You'll learn eventually, right? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Andy Barber Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

#navybrat writes #tbswritingchallenge #andy barber x reader #andy barber x female reader #andy barber x female!reader #andy barber x you #andy barber x y/n #andy barber x fem!reader #andy barber x f!reader #andy barber #andy barber fanfiction #andy barber fanfic #andy barber imagine #andy barber au #andy barber fic #andy barber fan fic #andy barber fan fiction #chris evans x reader #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #chris evans #soft!dark andy Barber #dark!andy barber #soft!dark andy barber x reader #dark!andy barber x reader

[kelcemenow]

Missing.

Pairing Travis Kelce x Reader

Words 4640

Warnings Strong language, angst, smut, fluff. It's also really long and my proof-reading wasn't the best for this one!

I'm back to requests! This Anon has been waiting a long time which I'm so sorry for but I wanted to get As The Snow Falls finished first...I'm not good with having multiple stories going at once! "I have a new request angst to fluff - Travis x reader - Reader feels far from Travis due to practice and games she has been doing her best being there for him but something is falling after a game Travis accidentally takes out his anger on the reader that ends on a big relationship argument leading the reader to go out and stay with a friend for two nights having no contact with Travis making him realize he had to do something to prevent leaving the love of his life, and the have a happy ending I’ll let you continue with what you want"

The door slammed with force as you carefully poured the deep, ruby red coloured liquid from the bottle into the glass positioned in front of you. You turned your chin over your shoulder to look towards the living room to see Travis dropping his practice bag by the front door and charging towards the staircase.

You clenched your jaw and stared down at the perfectly cooked steak you had prepared along with roasted vegetables and a velvety blue cheese sauce. Travis had been distant for a few weeks, spending much of his time at practices and games. Even when he arrived home from his time at Arrowhead, he was quiet and irritable.

You were a few months into your whirlwind relationship and you weren't prepared for the stress of the football season. After all, this was a new environment for you. The late nights, the time away from each other, the media.

Pushing your chair away from you, you stood up from the dining table and quietly made your way up to your bedroom. Travis was changing out of his clothes, the steam from the running shower pouring out of the en-suite bathroom.

"Did you not shower after practice?" You said as you leaned against the doorframe.

Travis lifted his personalised Kansas City Chiefs t-shirt over his head, "Yeah. I need another one." His voice was monotonous and stern.

You looked down at your feet, "I made you dinner. I thought it would be nice to have a night in with a movie or something too?"

"I'm not hungry."

You swallowed hard, a lump forming in your throat, "And the movie?"

"I have games to watch." Travis pulled his sweatpants from his legs followed by his briefs.

You couldn't help but to let your eyes linger on his bare ass. His body was in peak condition due to the season starting, his firm muscles tight and strong.

"Is everything okay, Trav?" You asked with a shaky breath.

He rubbed his eyes with one hand, clutching at his discarded clothes with the other, tossing them into the laundry hamper, "I'm tired, okay? I don't need this."

You took a small step backwards and watched as he disappeared into the adjoining bathroom, his head still in his hands. You waited for a few seconds, hoping that he would run out of the room and towards you, profusely apologising for being short with you, holding you in his arms and laying kisses all over your face exactly like he used to. But he didn't.

You made your way back to the dining room, silently reminiscing of the early days in your relationship. You had met by chance through his coach Andy Reid. Your Mom was an old friend of his wife Tammy and when you were picking your Mom up after visiting her, Travis stopped by. Tammy was all too pleased to introduce you both, her and your Mom standing in the doorway and watching the flirting between you. Travis reached out to you a couple of days later.

"Hey Y/N, it's Travis from the other day. Cancel any plans you have for tonight for tonight because I'm taking you out."

You were taken aback by his forward approach, but flattered that the superstar athlete was paying you his attention.

"And what if I say no?"

Your love life had been historically dull. You'd been on dates and had a few short-term relationships but nothing seemed to stick. You either lost interest or the initial spark naturally fizzled out.

"I'll pick you up at 8."

Your first date was different from any other you'd had before. Travis had taken you axe throwing in the city and you had had an incredible time. Your eyes drifted to the fireplace. Positioned on the mantle was a framed photograph of that night. Travis' arm was hooked around the back of your neck and you were looking up at him with glassy eyes as he took a selfie of the two of you, his wide smile stretching from ear to ear.

You picked up the plates and with a long exhale of breath, deposited the food into the trash. Tears formed in your eyes as you clung to the countertop, your chest heaving with heavy sobs.

______________________________________________________________

"And he hasn't even apologised yet?"

"No, he's gone to practice. He left before I even woke up." Your hands were fidgeting with the sleeve of your sweatshirt as you sat on the couch.

Your best friend Amber had called you to double check your lunch plans and the conversation had drifted to your relationship woes.

"Maybe I went into this too quickly?"

You heard Amber sigh down the phone, "But that's not a reason as to why he's acting like a huge dick."

"I know, I know." You laughed under your breath, "He has a game at Arrowhead tomorrow."

"Are you gonna go?"

You paused for a moment. You had been to every single one of Travis' home games so far and a couple of the away ones. By not going, you were worried you would cause more tension.

"I think so." You said.

"I could come with you if you want?"

You smiled, "That would be awesome. Really, thank you."

"Don't mention it. I need some girl time, even if it is watching football. I'll get Chase to watch the boys. Just let me know what time to meet you and I'll be there." You heard some quiet commotion in the background, "Hunter, leave that alone. Sorry babe but I gotta go."

"Go, I'll text you later."

"Bye honey!"

Your arm dropped onto the sofa, your cell phone still clutched in your palm. The house felt empty and even though you were the only one there, it still some how felt empty when Travis was home. The rooms used to be full of laughter and noise, music playing or effervescent conversation. Lately, it was cold and tense. Something was missing.

You spent the rest of the day trying to let time pass quickly. You worked out for an hour, cleaned the kitchen and took a shower. It wasn't until later when you were loading the machine with laundry that you thought about Travis again. As you picked up his t-shirt from the night before, his warm scent drifted past your nose. You instantly felt melancholic, almost drained. Your daze was interrupted by the sound of the front door opening and closing. You dropped Travis' t-shirt in with the rest of the laundry and stood up from the floor before setting the machine away. You could hear Travis' footsteps around the house, moving from room to room, presumably looking for you.

"I'm here, baby." You called out.

As you stepped into the kitchen, Travis appeared suddenly in front you.

You jumped back slightly, a slight scream escaping your mouth, "Oh! Travis! You scared the shit out of me!"

He looked red faced and sweaty, "I came back from practice early."

Your eyebrows furrowed, "You left early? Why?"

"I felt bad about last night. I..." He looked down as his voice trailed off, "I got you these."

He sheepishly produced a beautiful bouquet of red roses from behind his back.

"Travis! These are gorgeous!"

He took a hold of your hand, "Baby, I'm so sorry. I know I've been in my head a bit these past couple of weeks."

You stared up into his pale, glossed eyes, "Well, next time you get stuck in my head. Talk to me, okay?"

"I love you." He whispered.

You smiled, "More and and more, everyday babe."

His eyes creased into a grin, relief filling his face. He enveloped you into a tight hug, burying his face into the crook of your neck. Your fingers grazed the back of his neck as his lips began laying gentle kisses onto your skin. You relaxed into his hold, feeling safe and content that you had him back again. His kisses trailed towards your mouth that you gladly accepted, allowing his tongue to explore yours. You pulled away quickly so that you were able to take a gasp of air and Travis' hands grabbed onto your ass, your legs wrapping around his waist. He carefully carried you over to the countertop and gently placed you onto it. His eyes darted to your core, your shorts riding up dangerously high. There was almost a darkness that flashed across his face which only caused you to ache and yearn more for him.

He lunged towards you, taking your face in his hands and pressing his mouth onto yours. Your heads dipped and weaved in a perfect rhythm with each other as the kiss deepened further. You held onto the neckline of his shirt, your knuckles turning white. Small moans filled your mouth as the vibrations from Travis' lips forced your hips to grind gently.

"I want you." He whispered.

You removed your t-shirt quickly, throwing it across the room, "You have me."

His eyes widened at the sight of your bare breasts, his mouth dropping open a little. He dropped to his knees and dragged his tongue from your ankle and along the inside of your thigh, reaching your covered pussy. His fingers played with the fabric as you leaned back slightly, opening your legs further.

"Oh, baby." Travis' voice was low, almost a growl.

Your pussy pulsated as your aching intensified. Travis watched intently as a small wet patch formed on your pale blue shorts, his bottom lip quivering.

"You're so wet already, baby girl."

You reached forward and grabbed at the back of his head, "Just fuck me, Travis."

He jumped up quickly and pulled his sweatpants away from his body, letting them fall around his ankles. He pulled your shorts to the side, not even wasting time in taking them off and wrapped his large hand around his engorged cock. He pumped it a few times before lining himself up with your glistening entrance. Travis' eyes quickly connected with yours before you looked down, watching as he pushed his cock inside of you. Your mouth opened, letting a loud gasp escape into the room.

He filled you perfectly, stretching your walls ever so slightly. His fingers kneaded into your ass as he thrusted roughly, the sounds of wet skin slapping getting louder with each motion. You held him closely to you, feeling his hot breath against your collarbone and listened intently to each grunt and moan from his mouth.

You noticed that Travis' thrusts were starting to slow, every action taking more time than the last.

"Everything okay?" You breathed.

He avoided your gaze, "Yeah. I'm just so close...but I want to last a bit longer for you."

Something tightened in your core, "It's okay baby, just enjoy it. Don't stress."

Travis hissed through his struggle as he gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut, "I want you to come first."

You could feel yourself unravelling, "I'm almost there, keep going."

He looked up at you and nodded, resuming his previous pace, his hips snapping forwards harshly. You screamed loudly through the intense pleasure, your vision blurring. Your skin was sticking to his, caused by the slick layer of sweat that was coating the both of you. Travis' face twisted, his eyebrows pulled in together and his jaw clenched tightly. He huffed through his teeth a few times before your pussy fiercely throbbed, signalling your orgasm. You watched as Travis lowered his head, watching your wetness coat his dick as his thrusts became sloppy and unpredictable.

Your pussy was becoming overstimulated, every movement causing your walls to contract tighter. Your head fell forward slightly and your mouth made contact with Travis' shoulder, your teeth sinking into his flesh.

Travis cried out, a mixture of pain and pleasure. His hips gave a couple more hard jolts before his whole body became tense, his eyes widened and a breathy moan rang in your ear.

You both caught your breath for a few seconds before Travis lay gentle kisses on your collarbone, his mouth humming in contentment. He leaned away slightly to reach for some kitchen towel, handing some to you before he carefully pulled his dick out, cum seeping from your folds.

"I can run you a bath?" He asked.

You purred in agreement, letting him help you to hop down from the countertop and hand you your shirt. Your heart fluttered as you looked at your hand in his, which looked tiny in comparison. It was as if the last couple of weeks hadn't even happened. You had your Travis back.

______________________________________________________________

Your fingers tapped at your phone screen.

"Want me to wait for you outside the locker room? X"

Amber was standing next to you, her eyes scanning the emptying field, "It was still a good game, right?"

You turned to her, your eyebrows lowered, "That won't matter. He missed 3 touchdowns, got 2 personal fowls and he gave away an interception. They may have won by a couple of points, but something is off with Travis."

"But you said everything was okay now?"

You shoved your hands into your coat pockets, "Yeah, I mean last night he apologised and we talked and spent time together...and we had the most amazing sex."

Amber beamed at you, "Well then, that's a good sign?"

"I suppose so. I just hope he isn't beating himself up too much." You felt your cell phone vibrate against your fingers. Pulling it out of your pocket, you read the reply from Travis.

"No, it's fine. I gotta deal with some stuff here. You go home."

"On the other hand, he might just go back to miserable Travis." You said, disappointed.

Amber craned her neck to see the phone screen. She took a couple of seconds to see the messages before she shook her head, "Girl, just go and see him. He clearly needs his woman to console him."

"You saw what he said. He has some stuff to figure out. I don't wanna push his boundaries." You pulled your Chiefs knit hat down a little further, "I'll just meet him at home."

Amber sucked the air through her teeth, "Okay, if you think that's the right thing to do?"

You began to shuffle out of the viewing box, crowds of people filing out into the parking lot. The air outside was cold, bitter against your cheeks and as you walked around the side of the stadium, you noticed someone rushing out of a side door. You squinted your eyes, trying hard to focus on the figure when you heart dropped to your stomach.

"Is that Travis?" Amber said, her finger pointing forwards.

You squinted harder, watching as your boyfriend pulled his hood up and jumped into his car, speeding away down the road.

Amber continued, "Where is he going?"

"I...I don't know."

"Maybe he's changed his mind and he's going to meet you at home?"

You swallowed hard, "Then why didn't he call me to tell me that?"

There was a moment of silence before Amber grabbed onto your arm, "Maybe he wanted to surprise you? Maybe he's gone to get you some more roses...or dinner...or something?"

"Maybe." You said quietly.

You couldn't shake the worrying feeling that was lying in the pit of your stomach. You felt as though the hotdog and soda that you had consumed during the game was going to make another appearance.

"I'd better shoot off. Chase is probably tearing his hair out with the boys." She squeezed your hand, "Not that he's a terrible Father. He's great! But when you've got two, it's hard, you know? One starts climbing on the furniture and the other is pulling the trash from the bin."

"Amber." You placed your other hand over hers, "I know you're trying to ease the awkward atmosphere...and I really appreciate it. But I think I just want to go home."

She gave you a sincere smile, pulling you closer for a hug before heading to her own car and leaving you stood in the parking lot. Swarms of people were filtering past you as you tried to figure out what Travis was doing. You closed your eyes after a few moments and shook your head, desperate not to let your brain spiral to exaggerated thoughts that you wanted to avoid.

The drive home was difficult to say the least. It was almost as if every radio station knew of your struggle, continuously playing songs detailing heartbreak, cheating, lies and broken relationship. After the fourth or fifth try, you gave up, turning the radio off with loud sigh.

Confusion set in when you pulled into the driveway and Travis' car was nowhere in sight. You turned your engine off, wondering where he could be. He had left before you and before most of the traffic, meaning he would've made it home earlier. Unless he had come home and gone back out.

The house was quiet, just as you'd left it, only furthering your confusion. You pulled your phone out of your bag, tapping the screen.

"Where are you? I'm home and you're not here?"

Sitting down on the sofa, you turned on the television, hoping for a distraction but you barely had time to focus on the screen when your eyes began to droop. Your skin tingled as your muscles completely relaxed before you drifted off to sleep.

______________________________________________________________

Your eyes fluttered open as the lights of a car shone into the darkened room. Your hand felt around for the television remote, turning it off and reaching for the lamp. Rubbing your eyes, you grabbed your phone to check the time.

01.30.

Your chest tightened quickly. You heard the sound of keys jiggling in the front door before it opened and Travis walked in, his game bag in his hand.

"Where have you been?" You said, coldly.

Travis looked at you with no hint of an expression, "I just needed to sort some things out."

"At Arrowhead?" You pressed.

"Yeah."

"So, why did I see you get into your car immediately after the game?"

He avoided your gaze, choosing to walk towards the kitchen and placing his bag onto the floor.

"Travis?" You asked, your voice getting louder.

"What?" He snapped as he returned into the room.

Standing up from the sofa, you could feel the anger building inside of you, "Is this why you've been weird lately? Barely speaking to me, barely spending any time with me?"

Travis' eyes burned into you from across the room, "What are you getting at?"

"Are you fucking someone else?"

He said nothing. Instead, he looked down at the floor and started laughing under his breath.

A red mist descended over you, "Travis. Answer me!"

"This is ridiculous."

"Okay. So, now I'm being ridiculous."

Travis slammed his keys onto the cabinet next to him, "Don't you dare put words in my mouth. I didn't say you were being ridiculous, but right now, you fucking are. I fucked up tonight."

Your eyebrows knitted together, "What do you mean?"

"I fucked up the game! I don't know if you were paying attention out there but I sucked. Big time. Pat is mad at me, Coach is made at me, I let the whole team down."

"But, you won?"

"That's not the fucking point!" He yelled, his face flashing red, "I don't know where my head is right now. And you're not helping!"

You stepped back slightly, "I'm not helping? All I've been trying to do is help! But you won't let me. You don't want me to."

The room was silent. It was eerie and tense.

You cleared your throat, shifting the large lump that had formed, "So, you know what? I'll just go."

Travis watched as you disappeared up the staircase, "Babe. No, I didn't mean that."

You slammed the bedroom door, grabbing a few essentials that you needed, trying desperately to hold back the flood of tears that you knew were imminent. You typed furiously on your phone, sending a message to someone who you knew could help you. You heard Travis move into his office downstairs and took the opportunity to leave while you could. You didn't want to see him and you certainly didn't want another argument, so you disappeared out of the front door, grabbing your car keys on the way.

Rain was pouring from the dark clouds above you, soaking your body almost immediately. With a press of a button, your car headlights lit up the front of the house. Taking shelter in the car, the sound of the raindrops hitting against the windscreen rang loudly in your ears. As soon as you pulled out of the driveway, you internal dam burst. You blinked the tears away as fast as you could but it was no use, the mixture of the rain covered windscreen and your bleary eyes made it hard for you to see the road ahead. Luckily, you knew exactly where you were going and it wasn't far away. You ignored your cell phone that had been ringing non-stop since you had left the house and continued down the road that you knew all too well.

Once you had arrived, you quietly knocked on the door, wiping your wet eyes with your sweatshirt sleeve. It opened almost immediately and Amber emerged from the house with open arms and a sympathetic smile.

"Honey, come in."

______________________________________________________________

You felt numb. You felt empty. You felt like something was definitely missing now.

For the last couple of days or so, Amber had been an incredible friend, giving you space and bringing you cups of hot tea almost every hour. But the one thing she kept doing, was talking about Travis.

"Maybe you should call him?" She said to a pile of blankets that were strewn on the bed.

"I don't want to call him." You said from underneath.

She started to peel the layers back, "He's called you about 60 times...which you would know if you looked at your cell."

"I just said, I don't want to call him."

"I know, I know. But he's called me a few times and he just sounds do upset."

You pushed the blankets away from your face, "You spoke to him?"

Amber tipped her head to one side, "Yeah. I didn't plan on it, I swear. But he wasn't giving up and I just thought someone should at least hear what he has to say."

You brought your hand up to your face, your teeth clamping down on your nails.

"Maybe we should go for a walk? Get you some fresh air?"

You stared up at her for a few seconds.

"You know, it'll be good for you? It'll be amazing how much better you'll feel once you're up and about. We could go and grab a coffee and head over to the-"

"Alright, alright." You rolled your eyes, "If I say yes, will you shut up?"

Amber beamed back at you, "Yes, I will!"

______________________________________________________________

It was a crisp morning, the cool air whipping around your face. The small park nearby to Amber's house was calm, with brown leaves dusted all over the grass. The pathways were lined with swaying trees and even though you hated to admit it, you did feel better.

Your takeaway coffee cup was warming your hands and the hot liquid tingled on your tongue. Amber held up to her promise and said very little, allowing you to clear your head and enjoy the walk.

Pouring the last of your coffee into your mouth, you scanned the area for a nearby trash can. You spotted one next to a small bench and as you approached it, you noticed a letter resting on the wooden panels. Furrowing your brows, you leaned in closer to see what was written on the front of the envelope.

‘Y/N’

You spun around to see Amber holding her hands to her face. She quickly shuffled towards you and took the empty cup from you, throwing it into the trashcan. She held you by your shoulders and looked at you with anticipation and a slight hint of guilt.

"Don't hate me, okay?"

Leaning down, she picked up the letter and handed it to you, taking a couple of steps back.

Your fingers gently caressed the cream envelope for a moment. You took a deep breath and opened it, immediately seeing Travis' handwriting covering the white paper.

"Read it out loud." Amber said, excitement in her voice.

You shot her a look before staring down at the letter in your hands. "My Y/N. My whole life I have had to be part of a team. Countless times I have taken on the responsibility of making sure my team are rock solid, focused and have each others backs. But I realise now that I have neglected the most important team of all. Our team. Me and you."

A small lump formed in your throat as you read the words.

"I know I have been distant these past couple of weeks, I have closed myself off from you when I should have been honest and told you the truth."

You could feel your heart thumping harder and harder.

"I guess I was scared, worried. But I've realised that our team, me and you, mean more to me than I first thought. When I met you, you changed me. You make me a better person and I cannot thank you enough for that. I feel so grateful that I have you in my life and I want to spend every second that I can with you."

Your hands began to tremble.

"I am so sorry that I ever made you feel the way you did. I should be the one protecting you from hurt and disappointment, and I have let you down. I have been a mess without you. Without your singing when you're in the shower. Without your delicious baking. Without the smell of your perfume around the house. Something has been missing these past couple of days and I want it back. If you can ever forgive me, please believe me when I say that I am sorry and I love you."

"More and more, everyday babe."

You whipped your head around to see Travis standing with his hands burrowed into his pockets. He looked pale and tired.

"Travis?" You breathed.

He shook his head, staring into your eyes intently, "That night, when I came home late, I was visiting your parents."

"My parents?"

"Yeah. Man, your Dad is chatty. That's why I was so late."

Your face twisted with confusion, "Then why didn't you just tell me?"

"Because I wanted it to be a surprise."

You watched as Travis lowered himself down onto one knee, pulling his hands from his pockets and presenting a small velvet box. Amber squealed with excitement and your jaw dropped open in shock.

"I've never loved anyone the way I love you. And that scared me, but it shouldn't have. You are so perfect for me and I want to spend my life with you, if you'll have me?"

Moisture built up in your eyes and when you squeezed them shut, tears began falling down your cheeks. You quickly wiped them dry so that you could see when Travis opened the box, a beautiful white gold ring inside, encrusted with diamonds.

"Y/N, will you marry me?"

"Oh my God, yes! Yes!" You cried, bending down to take his face in your hands.

Travis stood up, carefully placing the ring onto your finger. He looked deeply into your eyes as his arms snaked around your waist, holding you closely to him. "I've got my missing piece back."

"And it's all because of me!" Amber sang as she ran towards you both, throwing her arms around you as you laughed, clutching the letter that brought you back.

_____________________________________________________________

I love to imagine that Travis is this romantic. However, I do struggle writing him to be a moody asshole! My requests are still closed until I make a bigger dent into my current list. Which I will get through as quickly as I can. My main problem is, my fics always end up way longer that I intend them to be!

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[hellfirecvnt]

It's Personal

Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

TW: Violence against Y/N (not via Billy), farfetched for the plot, Billy is mean, angst, possible cringe idk. We're all friends here. THE VIOLENCE IS DESCRIBED IN DETAIL FOR THE MOST PART. A little bit non-canon Billy, but if you're reading his dialogue as sassily and as dry as I'm writing it, it's not quite as jarring to his personality.

Notes: I literally just learned about the "Who did this to you?" Trope and now I'm giving it an angsty go. This is not smut, womp, womp. Also, I did the gifs like a picture book so you can kinda see the expression or energy I was going for. Summary: Billy's been an ongoing bully/ nuisance in your life since you met. He's acting a little different after finding out you've been hurt.

"Can you try not to take up half the lecture dick-riding the professor?" Billy catches you as you're making your way across campus. He's always been an issue for you, ever since he moved here your junior year in high school. Now you're both freshmen in college. He'd taken a year off to pursue other outlets, but sometimes you're convinced he did it just to be able to torment you in college, seeing as he was always a grade above.

"What are you talking about, Billy?" You ask with an exasperated sigh. Already too exhausted from studying late the night before to deal with his endless harassment.

"I'm saying every time we have this course, you ask a million fucking questions the whole time," his voice is low, but filled with a palpable hate. Why does he dislike you so much? You've never known. You've never asked. "Try to save your desperation for after class, cool? It's hard to watch," He jabs, speed-walking ahead of you.

Most days, you'd say something back. A quip just as hateful, if not worse. You were his rival in every sense of the word. The two of you even shared the same genre of fashion sense. You stole his spotlight, and he doesn't like it, so he notices when your venom is running low. You're silent the entire lecture, not because of what Billy said to you, but because you're tired.

Your study session only ran so late because you and your boyfriend spent most of the day arguing. The gaslighting is constant, and his moods have become more and more unstable and harder to navigate. You tell yourself over and over that you love him. You've loved him since you were young. He's your high school sweetheart. Andy was on the basketball team in high school and while that type usually didn't take to a hair-metal gal like you, he seemed so smitten when you met.

The room is dismissed and you try to file out long before Billy can make it to the door. He laughs at your desperate attempt to get away. Like a cockroach scurrying away from a suddenly illuminated bulb. You're not fast enough and as he passes you before you reach the exit to the building, he leans over and taunts you in your ear.

"It's about time you listened," he hisses and walks away laughing. You're indifferent. Nothing he says could hurt the way Andy's words do. You tune everything out to make room for your insecure thoughts to take over. You blame yourself for Andy's rapid change in personality. What could you have done to make him feel like this toward you? Your mind is far too occupied by these untrue concerns, that you barely feel the anxiety settle in until you get back to your dorm. It was a bit more pricey on your tuition, but your scholarship allowed you to have a dorm room for yourself. Instead of another bed, it has a small "living room" area.

With a deep, grounding sigh, you reach for the door handle and step inside. Things are fine. Andy greets you with a smile and kisses you sweetly as you set your things down by the door. You're pleasantly surprised, allowing all the toxic thoughts circling your mind to melt away under his gentle touch.

"How was class?" He asks.

"It was fine. Nothing spectacular," you giggle, smiling warmly, overtly relieved that he's not still upset with you. You can barely recall what he was angry about, to begin with. You snuggle into him as you both relax on the couch. He stares straight ahead as he opens his mouth to speak.

"One of my buddies said he saw you talking to that Steve guy," Andy's voice becomes colder, and you realize it was all a trap. You're wrapped in his arms, feeling his body go rigid as you hesitate to answer. "Y/N." He finally looks down at you, meeting your anxious gaze.

"Oh, uh," your throat goes dry. "I did talk to him. He was a little late and just needed the notes from the first section. I charged him five bucks." You begin to ramble, hoping to defuse the situation before he explodes. "He's still going steady with that Debra girl, too. She's in my journalism class. I bet those cookie-cutter losers end up married, honestly."

"You know I don't like you talking to other guys without me." Andy clenches his jaw.

"I know! I completely understand, too. You know I love how possessive you are, babe. It's hot," you're desperate and hopeful that stroking his ego will put this anger to bed. "There were so many people around, so I was thinking nothing could happen." You furrow your brow at your own words. "Your friend was even there to make sure!"

Andy's grip around you tightens, nearly cutting off your ability to fill your lungs just using one arm.

"I don't ask you for a lot, Y/N." His free hand reaches up to your face, gripping your jaw and forcing you to look into his eyes, though you weren't looking away to begin with. "Don't make me look like a fool." When he loosens his grip, your lungs inflate with a loud gasp and his shift in position slides you off the couch, into the floor with a small thud. Now you're angry. The two of you have screamed at each other plenty of times, but how dare he act so bold?

"Andy," you stand, hovering over him where he remains on the couch. His arched brows frame his bright eyes with anger. "Get out." He smirks, and it fills you with unease. Standing from the couch, he takes one step forward, nearly chest to chest with you, if it weren't for the dramatic height difference. He towers over you, stealing the feeling of power you thought you were cultivating.

"What'd you just say to me?" He asks with a sociopathic smile.

"I said," You swallow hard. "Get. The fuck. Out." You barely get a chance to speak the last word of your sentence before a fast, hard open hand meets your cheek, knocking you to the ground, and almost sending you across the room, it felt like.

"Do not ever talk to me like that just because you got caught," Andy's words are full of anger. You stare at him with wide eyes, arching your brow in an expression that asks him who the fuck he thinks he is. He storms out of the dorm, but you know he'll be back. And after these events, you're scared to try and stop him. His college teammates are at every corner, it seems. It's as if ever since Jason went out of state for college, they all bend to Andy's will. Losers. Andy doesn't come home until after you've fallen asleep. You stayed up as late as your body could take, but he wasn't back in bed until 5 AM. You have no idea where he's been.

The next day, it's your misfortune that you and Billy share yet another class. This one was early in the morning rather than yesterday's afternoon lecture. You're running on very little sleep, and the trauma of Andy snapping and putting his hands on you. It's just something you could never even fathom. The way he would kiss the ground you walked on when you first met, how could he? You're more than distracted, staring directly at the floor as you walk until you run flat into someone else in the hall.

"I stood here, completely still, to see if you'd notice. I guess other people don't exist to you, huh, princess?" He mocks you. It's not long before he notices the dark bags under your lifeless eyes and the speckles of red that have risen in the hazy shape on the side of your face. Assuming it's an allergic reaction like you had back in high school, he didn't hold back. "Jesus Christ, Y/N. You look like shit."

"Still look better than you could pull, pussy," you sneer, shoving past him. "Don't fucking make me late." He steps in front of you again, knowing neither of you is late because he's on the same schedule.

"What happened to your face? It looks like your boyfriend had to tell you twice," he bursts out laughing at his distasteful joke. You can feel your blood begin to boil. You no longer wish to exchange hateful comments. Now you want to hurt him. You want to hurt Billy the way Andy hurts you. You can't swing on him, so you take your next best shot.

"Yeah? How many times did your mom have to tell you before she just gave up and left?" You boldly stare Billy in the eyes, hoping so badly that none of Andy's henchmen see the two of you going at it. Billy's jaw is rigid, and you can see it tighten as he grinds his teeth, subduing his emotions. You've never come at him like that, it wasn't expected. His taunting smirk is long gone.

"Are you trying to get your fucking ass kicked, Y/L/N?" Billy's disgusted with himself the minute he says it. Of course, he doesn't mean that. He'll drive you into an early grave, but it's never been in his moral compass to hurt a woman the way his father hurt his mom. He wants to rescind the rhetorical threat, but his ego just clamps his lips shut. Your eye twitches as you wonder what else you've got to lose. Or would Andy hit you again for letting another man kick your ass? Your thoughts are exaggerated and full to the brim with frustration. You finally explode.

"Fucking do it then, Billy! Swing! Hit me, motherfucker!" You drop your belongings and stomp toward him and he's unsure how to react now that you've called him on his bluff/ intrusive thought.

"Calm the fuck down. You look ridiculous," Billy takes a cautious step back.

"No, let's go outside. Let's see how hard you can hit someone half your fucking height, pussy!" You're nearly causing a scene, but the building is empty for the hour. Tears well in your eyes and you refuse to let up, demanding he act on his "big, scary" threat. He won't. He stares at your watery, red eyes. Your face is flushed and only your cheeks, nose, and around your eyes hold any pigment. He essentially waits until you tire yourself out.

"You've gotta do something about that shit, Y/N. You're fucking losing it," he shakes his head.

"I'm not losing any-fucking-thing, Hargrove. Don't ever mistake me for a bitch you can scare off with an empty fucking threat," you spit, grabbing your things and taking off, leaving Billy standing confused in the empty hallway.

"What the fuck was that?" He questions aloud. He has no idea you've been drained with no way to recharge. You've been hurt with no way to heal. To him, you're losing your goddamn mind. After that, he's not even angry at your comment anymore. He's just, concerned? Maybe just curious, really. After all, he's supposed to be your burden. Anything else takes the attention off of him.

The class is long and just like yesterday, you're quiet when you usually never stop engaging. Even the professor notices, and she asks you to linger behind after the lecture is over.

"Hey, Y/N. What's up? You were so quiet today," the professor's soft voice is sweet to your ears.

"I've just been, um, tired." You shake your head, barely convincing yourself.

"Is that a bruise on your cheek, honey?" The kind, older woman asks with two hands resting on her coffee mug. Just outside the open door, Billy waits for you to pass by before he realizes you're staying behind. He scoots as close to the door as he can, flat along the wall, listening.

"A bruise," he whispers to himself, recalling what he thought was a rash. His stomach almost attempts to simulate the feeling of guilt as he remembers the joke he made at you. The one that set you off.

"Oh, no. It's a reaction. New laundry detergent fucked me up," you stop yourself. "Messed me up, sorry."

"Y/N, you're an adult. I can't make you do anything you don't want to do, but it's very clearly not hives," the professor sighs, her eyes full of concern as she stares at the ever-developing bruise as it slowly takes the shape of a hand. "Is it another student at the University?"

"Ma'am, with all due respect, I'm dealing with a lot right now. I will see you on Wednesday. Goodbye." You snatch your things up and zip toward the door, holding your breath. The wind from your speed walking blows your hair back, giving Billy a perfect view of the hand-shaped bruise yellowing on the side of your face. You're too determined to get out of there to react to his eavesdropping, so the two of you just share a look, and you keep going.

Billy furrows his brow. He's unsure you even have a boyfriend, so who exactly is leaving bruises like that right, front and center on your face? After his last course of the day, Billy congregates with his friends at a nearby frat house belonging to a different college.

"Hey, Tommy," Billy calls his friend's attention. Tommy pulls himself away from the group of guys he was laughing with and sits across from Billy. "You know that Y/N girl? Lots of denim, nice ass?" It's not until the last two descriptors that Tommy recalls who you are. Figures.

"Yeah, what about her?"

"What's her deal? She dating anybody?" Billy asks, innocently enough.

"I don't know, man. Why do you always ask me about shit like that?" Tommy laughs.

"Because you gossip like a woman," Billy smirks, standing from his slouched position on the couch and grabbing a beer from the large, ice-filled cooler in the kitchen. "She's some annoying broad in a couple of classes with me. I thought I'd ask around and see if there's a reason she never shuts her goddamn mouth." Both of them laugh at his hateful remark, but it's true to him. You get on his nerves, but it's less what you say, and more so the fact that you do "him" better than him. The men drink irresponsibly and cause a ruckus until late, late at night where they then wander back to their campus/ dorms on foot.

You wake up in the morning finally feeling well-rested for the first time in a while, despite the sudden changes in your relationship. You look over to see Andy's side of the bed is empty. You assume he slept over at the frat house after getting too fucked up. You know he likes to party.

Sitting comfortably on your couch, watching an episode of your favorite show, though it's a rerun, you involuntarily flinch when you hear the door open. Andy slightly stumbles through, laughing with messy hair. His clothes seem disheveled, but you chalk it up to drunken hijinks.

"Hey, babe! Did you have fun?" You ask, smiling, beaming, really. Hoping the sound of his laughter is a sign he's in a good mood this morning.

"Huh?" He looks over at you as if he didn't notice your existence until you spoke.

"I was just asking if you had a good time. Sorry I couldn't go with you, I was just too tired," you laugh.

"Oh, no. It's cool. I like it when it's just me and the guys, actually." His confession makes you a little sad, but you try to understand.

"Got any plans for today?" You grin, letting your guard down.

"For the love of God, dude. Can I get in the door first?" He snaps.

"Okay... Sorry," you quieted yourself down at first, but then quickly realized that's not who your daddy raised. You're getting ready to confront him again despite the smack until you notice something that makes your stomach drop, a small trail of three faint hickeys along your long-term boyfriend's neck. "Babe. Where did those come from?"

"What are you talking about?" He groans, throwing himself on the couch next to you, gripping your thigh possessively.

"I'm talking about the hickeys on your neck, Andy. Where did they come from?" Your voice is low and shaky. "Just you and the guys, huh?"

"Don't start with this shit again, Y/N. I'm too hungover." He dismisses you entirely, and all the rage you'd been holding back to be the "cool girlfriend" comes pouring out.

"You knocked me to the floor for looking at Steve Harrington! You put your hands on me for some made-up story you formulated in your own head and now you're coming home with hickyes?!" The longer you scold him, the darker his expression becomes.

"I'm giving you one fucking chance to get on your fucking knees right now and apologize," Andy's unsettlingly calm. You're frozen. Too scared to be openly defiant, but too angry to fold at his command. "One... Two..." He stands, softly placing a hand on your cheek and sliding it up into your hair, gracefully scraping the tips of his fingers behind your ear. It's so soft and soothing, that the sensation causes goosebumps to rise on your skin. Your eyes flutter shut and just as they're about to open again, he closes his fist around a large portion of your hair and forces you to the ground.

"Andy!" You scream, both terrified and in pain.

"I'm so sick of this, Y/N. I'm sick of you," he growls through gritted teeth, holding you painfully at his side like a heeling dog.

"God damn it, stop! It's fucking over! Fuck whoever you want!" You cry, shifting your position against him in hopes of loosening the pull against your scalp.

"And let you whore yourself out to every other guy on campus? Fuck off. You're mine." He finally releases your hair, tossing you forward in front of him. He kneels down to get closer to your face, speaking lowly. "I heard Hargrove's been asking about you. Think you're safe with your playboy side-piece?"

"He's not my side-piece! Please, Andy. Why are you being like this?" You hold a hand up to defend yourself.

"You think I don't see you two whispering to each other? You think you're smart enough to hide anything from me?" Andy's voice is slowly rising in volume. You worry the other students will hear the commotion. You don't want to lose your solo dorm rights seeing as men aren't supposed to "live" with women in the dorms.

"He's a dick, dude! I fucking hate the guy, please stop!" Your makeup is trailing down your face as you continue to cry for mercy. He shakes his head at the scene.

"I tried warning you. I tried getting my point across to you, but you won't hear me," he sighs as he snatches your hair back into his fist in one, quick, snake-like action. You wail at the aching tug, squeezing your eyes shut from the pain. Just as you go to open them, you see his hand flying toward you. It starts with open-handed smacks, knocking the wind out of you from how bad they hurt, but he progresses until he's landing blow after blow, all over you. Anywhere he can reach as you try to block him.

Eventually, you're badly roughed up, and Andy stands to look at what he's done. The remaining alcohol seems to clear from his system as the reality of his actions sets in.

"Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck," he mumbles, tearing his shirt off as it's stained with your blood. He shoves it deep into the trashcan and disappears to wash the evidence of the horrors against you off of his hands. He returns to where you lie in the living room. He's wearing a fresh shirt and his breath heaves as he stares at your seemingly unconscious body. You're awake though, barely. Holding your breath as long as possible, only allowing the shallowest of breaths, basking in the stillness after the abhorrent beating.

Andy bolts out the door and after a few moments of silence, loud sobs of relief and pain emit from your sore chest. You roll over into a ball, holding yourself close as you process everything. You mourn who you were before the person you trusted most betrayed you. You mourn your relationship, regardless of the last few days. You mourn your own face as you imagine the recovery process will be long and draining. You lie there for a while until night falls.

Once it's dark out, you sneak to the old gym building to use the showers there, hoping to avoid running into anyone and having to answer any questions about your battered appearance. No one uses the old gym because it's full of spiders and has a terrible draft, but it's still open to the students 24/7. It's your run-of-the-mill college basketball court with a weight room and showers.

You get inside the building and listen to the silence of the empty halls. Peace. You're numb now. You've cried all you can, and the pain has become a dull hum. Now you just want to shower and try to find yourself beneath all the blood. You scale the walls of the dark hallway, searching for a light switch. You nearly jump out of your skin when you feel what you can only imagine is human flesh.

"Oh fuck!" You and the mystery person exclaim in unison, startled by each other's presence. Still on edge, you duck down, covering your face. The light flips on and you recognize the sweaty figure who stands before you. Billy. He comes to this gym for privacy in the weight room and always has. Not as confident as his demeanor would lead you to believe.

"Had to be you, didn't it?" He rolls his eyes. "Did you come here to- Oh fuck, Y/N." His uncreative insult is cut short when you lower your arms, revealing the massacre of swollen features and bloody skin that used to be your face. His mouth hangs open for a moment. "What happened to you?"

"Oh, shut the fuck up. Like you fucking care, Hargrove. Get out of my way," you're angry, and it feels like you'll be angry forever.

"Hey," he stops you from walking past him by stepping in your path. "I said what happened?" His voice sounds different. Like you've never heard before. Uncharacteristically concerned, but don't let that fool you. It's still not a lot of concern and it's quite monotoned. His eyes search yours for any kind of answer and it's the least arched his brow has ever been. He's being so... Quiet. You're silent too, stunned by his behavior.

"Thought you were gonna kick my ass too, Billy. You scared now?" Your remark is meant to be a bold taunt, but your voice cracks as you fight for your life to hold back tears.

"Y/N, I'm serious. Who did this to you?" He asks sternly, losing patience by the minute. You still can't seem to trust him enough to open up, so you look down at the ground in silence. "Fuck it. Come on." Billy's long legs float him swiftly down the hall and you hesitate to follow, ultimately deciding all these years arguing with Billy have at least felt better than the last three days with Andy. He leads you to the empty men's locker room where he retrieves an old first-aid kit and a bottle of water from the coach's office, then he makes his way to a locker and retrieves a clean shirt. It's soft and worn in and has the name of your university written across the front.

"Thanks," you mumble, taking the box and other supplies from him. You douse the shirt in water and begin to try to wipe your face clean. There's no mirror, so you can't quite tell what you're doing, causing you to scrape over your open wounds and flinch.

"Just fucking," Billy snatches the damp shirt from you. "Let me do it." He's careful and thorough as he gently works the soft, wet fabric across the new and old blood covering your identity. You can't help but stare at his eyes as they focus so intently on each section of your face that he wipes clean. Just as he's finishing up, his eyes meet yours for a moment. It's a short, little second, but it felt so drawn out. Billy breaks the eye contact when he sets the shirt to the side.

"That should be okay, for now." He reaches for the kit in your hands.

"I can do it, Billy," you remind him, yanking the box away, rejecting any more gentle touch. It doesn't feel like you deserve it right now.

"Let me help," he demands softly, popping the little tin box open and rummaging around for bandaids and antibiotic ointment. He patches you up and while he's working, you're watching his intense face. His brows are arched and his lips every so slightly pursed. You can't clock what emotion he's feeling. Obviously, he's expressing some sort of sympathy, but he hates you. He always has. So maybe he's just having a human moment.

"What's the matter with you, man? Are you fucking with me?" Your guard begins to rise again. You don't trust your own intuition anymore. You tighten your grip around a plastic pair of scissors from the first-aid kit. Billy notices and releases a laughing sigh.

"No, I'm not fucking with you." He places one final bandage. "You're insufferable as fuck, but I don't think you had this coming." He looks you up and down. That's as close as Billy can get to "comforting" anyone. "Don't stab me with those." He points to your hand and you blush, a little embarrassed by your overly-cautious behavior.

"Why do you hate me, Billy?" You ask, point blank as you release the scissors, catching him off guard.

"Because you're the worst. You're loud, you're egotistical, you're an ugly crier," he chuckles, all too quickly, being put on the spot.

"You're just describing yourself," you knit your brows, quickly wiping the tears from your eyes after his ugly cry comment. "I'm serious. You'd think we'd have so much in common. You hated me the second we met. Why?"

"I don't hate you, Y/N. I'm putting bandaids on your split fucking eyebrow. You're just fun to get a rise out of." Billy closes the kit and tosses it aside with the bloody shirt. It's not news to him that he torments you because of a mix of annoyance and attraction, but you have no idea. What started as his catty attempts to pick you up turned into an all-out rivalry when you were the first girl to tell him to shut the fuck up instead of batting your eyelashes at him. To you, he's just a mean dude. But right now, it's like he's someone else entirely. When he's acting like this, you're finally able to see what makes him so irresistible to every girl on campus. Your rivalry kept you blind to it, but now, you can see his brilliant teeth in his wide, warm smile. You can see his sunflower eyes, framed by long, thick, dark lashes. His jawline, his shoulders, everything about him seems so beautiful to you now.

"Thank you, Billy," you smile weakly. He scans your swollen features and something in him awakens. A possessiveness. Rage ensues. Every opinion of you he's ever had melts away except for his attraction to you. Your voice, your mannerisms, everything he's ever absolutely torn you to shreds for, suddenly he admits to himself that it never bothered him. In his eyes, you're his, even if you're just a target for his teasing, a bit of banter around the school, you're still his.

"You never said who did it," Billy chews his inner lip, trying to keep calm until he gets the information he needs from you.

"It doesn't matter-"

"It matters. Who was it?" His voice is stern and sharp. He's still knelt close to you even though he's done tending to your wounds.

"It just... Happened so fast..." You flinch as you recall opening your eyes to his incoming hand.

"Start from the beginning," the sternness in his voice softens. You give him the full run down. Billy's face remains stone, motionless, but his eyes twitch and flutter with each gruesome new detail dragging him further down to the point of no return.

"We've been together so long. I never thought..." You hold your hands up in confusion, dropping them hopelessly in your lap.

"A name. Now." Billy stares deep into your eyes as he makes his demands. You can almost feel a heat coming off his gaze as it bores into you. It's clear he will not relent until he gets the answer he's asking for.

"His name is Andy." That's all Billy needs before he's standing up and exiting the locker room without another word. "Billy?" You call after him, still sitting on the bench. You finally stand to follow when you don't hear a response from him. "Why do you care?" This stops him in his tracks. He turns around for a second as if he's going to explain, but he never does. He tilts his head with a small shrug and disappears. "Wait!" You call, but the exit door is already closing behind him and he stalks off into the dimly lit campus. He sparks up a cigarette on the way, exhaling a large cloud behind him. Andy better have life insurance.

Billy ponders your question as he makes his way across the courtyard. Regardless of any flirtatious feelings he has for you, this comes down to wishing he could've defended his mother in this same way. He was too small then, he's not now, and Andy's about to face the full extent of that rage extending all the way back to his childhood. For now, it's personal.

You take the time alone to have a quick shower to wash away the blood in your hair and hopefully make yourself feel a little better. You're careful not to get your face wet and ruin Billy's careful doctoring. Once your shower is finished, you grab your bag and head back to your dorm. It's still dark, so you keep close to the dim, yellow street lamps that lead to the student housing. There's a dull hum that vibrates from each light post, it's all you can hear, all you can focus on to make yourself stop thinking about Billy.

Back at your place, you lock the door as many times as possible before shakily taking a seat on the small couch. You flip the TV on, just to have something to fill the silence. Every time someone passes by your door, your heart rate leaps and you lose control of your breathing. After the third or fourth time it happens, you seem to desensitize. Billy's new demeanor he has toward you is all you can think about. The softness of his words, his touch. You didn't think he was capable of it. You curl up, pulling your legs to your chest as you snuggle into the plush cushions, nearly dozing off, trying to remember the way his shirt smelled when he was using it to clean you up.

Billy's hell-bent on getting his hands on Andy, tonight. Crossing the lot, he reaches his car and slides inside. His face is blank as he stares ahead, with only one objective in mind. He follows the sound of blaring house music to a nearby frat house and angrily tears the door open. Wasting no time, he walks right up to the first person he sees.

"Where's Andy?" He asks, yelling over the music. The first few people have no idea who he's looking for until he comes to Tommy. "Where's Andy?"

"Andy from Econ? He's upstairs. Dude's super stressed about something and took a bottle up there. Finals, man." Tommy laughs, but Billy's already walking away before he's even finished his sentence. The entire party becomes muffled beats in his ears as he climbs the stairs in pursuit of the man who made you look like a bad Halloween decoration.

First door, nothing. Second door, nothing. Third door, Billy slings it open and a stressed out, curly-haired brunette man jumps out of his skin.

"Fuck, dude! You fucking scared me!" He exclaims.

"You Andy?" Billy asks, already breathless with anticipation.

"I- yeah? Why?" Billy answers his question by crossing the room in the blink of an eye and scooping him up by his shirt. He slams Andy against the wall, eyes wide with unbound rage. "What the fuck are you doing, man?!" The commotion can't be heard over the party below. It's just the two of them.

"You know how much of a pussy you gotta be to beat up on someone half your height?" Billy strains through gritted teeth. This is a thin reference to what you said to him when he let his emotions cloud his judgment and threatened to kick your ass.

"Wait... Y/N? She's alive? Jesus Christ..." Andy's eyes nearly roll back with relief and Billy looks at him disgusted.

"What? You thought you beat her to death? Then, you just left her there and went to a party?" Billy raises his eyebrows, almost seeming to smile. "That's fucked up, man." He slams Andy against the wall again, harder, to accentuate his point.

"Come on, dude. Whatever she told you-"

"I'm not here to talk about her." Billy silences your cruel, long-time partner. "Right now, we're not gonna talk at all."

"Dude-" Billy tosses the guy to the floor, cutting off his futile begs.

"I think right now, I'm gonna beat the living shit out of you," Billy kneels at Andy's side. "And then I'm gonna go fuck your girlfriend."

Billy lands punch after punch, unintentionally mirroring the way Andy laid into you. The only difference is that Billy's got a lot more size, muscle, and strength training than Andy. He lays into him, pummeling in any way he can figure out to mimic all the bruises and blood he could see on you. Billy grips Andy's shirt by the shoulders and forcefully pulls him to his feet just to uppercut him in the stomach, over and over. Blood and saliva fly from Andy's mouth as Billy hooks his fist up against his stomach.

When he's finally done, Andy's no more than a gargling mess on the floor. Properly bloodied just like he left you. Once again, Billy kneels down to Andy, establishing dominance and reminding him who he's fucking with now.

"If you come near her again," Billy inhales and exhales a shuddering breath as adrenaline continues to surge through him. "I will hurt you. I will hurt your family. There is no hiding, I will fucking kill you." His threat is no more than a low whisper before he stands and leaves Andy to wallow in his filth.

Billy's drive back is short and sweet, but he doesn't trust Andy or his entourage of prissy jock boys, so he rolls his eyes and pulls into the lot in front of the women's dorms, and makes his way to yours. He's always known which one you stay in, though finding out was an accident while he was being snuck in by one of his one-night-stands. It was common practice, hence why Andy pretty much lived with you since he had a shared dorm on the men's side.

He raises his hand to bang on the door, but hesitates, knocking softly and even calling your name through the door so you'd know it was him.

"Y/N, it's Billy." You smile with relief, still steadying your anxiety from his initial knock.

"Billy? How did you know which dorm was mine?" You question as you pull the door open.

"I knocked on every single one. And asked for you by name. At 11 PM." He looks at you, straight-faced, annoyed that you think so little of him.

"Are you fucking serious? They'll crucify me," you sigh, unsure if you can even feel any more stress at this point.

"I'm fucking with you. I know where your dorm is because I pay attention."

"And here I thought I was so annoying," you chuckle. There's a short silence between you, something unheard of for you two. "Do you, um, wanna come in?" You step to the side, inviting him in. Nervous, but not sure why. He's never had that effect on you before.

"No, you're coming with me."

"I am?" You raise an eyebrow.

"Yeah. I just stirred up a lot of shit, probably. I don't like the idea of you sleeping here alone." His words are compassionate, but the delivery is so blank, that you'd think he didn't actually care at all.

"Oh, alright. Let me grab some stuff." You gather your things and follow Billy to his light blue Camaro. He opens the door for you, but even he's wearing an expression that says this is a foreign act of kindness for him. He closes the door and takes his spot in the driver's seat. Billy glances over at you, but you're peering out the car window, searching the shadows for movement. The copper-colored light shining from the street lamp illuminates the high points of your face, exposing your expression as he watches the anxiety dissolve into comfort. Something about being the cause of it strokes his already inflated ego.

"You know what?" You break the silence, turning to meet Billy's gaze.

"What?"

"Contrary to the way my face and body look right now, he really can't hit that hard." You raise your eyebrows and nod, reassuring him that you mean that with your whole chest.

"I wouldn't know. I didn't give him a chance to swing." His grip around the steering wheel tightens, but he grins proudly.

"Don't worry, I took enough for the both of us," you joke, earning a shocked laugh from the curly-haired man you positively loathed just a day or so ago.

"I dunno. I think you could've taken him if the circumstances were different," he smirks at you, chin up.

"Oh, absolutely. If the emotional ties weren't there, we'd at least have gone a round or two," you mimic boxing the dashboard. It's obvious to both of you that this is not the case, but making a joke of a bad situation is a lot easier than crying. Billy's relieved, as he would have zero idea how to even approach you if you were crying. He's the "tell you you're not a pretty crier and then wonder why you cry harder" type of guy.

"Matter of fact, put me back in coach," you chuckle, accidentally reopening the split on your lip. "Oh, fuck," you mumble, pressing a finger to the wound, worsening the mess.

"Shit," Billy grabs a napkin from his glove box. "Don't touch it," he snaps. You quickly pull your hand away from your face and for just a moment, your breath hitches in your chest. You don't mean to react this way, you're not scared of him, you hope he knows that. He gives a small smile and a nod, almost like a silent apology for scaring you. He holds the napkin to your lip for you as he pulls into the Men's dorm parking lot. His family, much like yours, paid the extra fees to have a large dorm room all to himself. It was sort of a necessity for Billy considering his short temper and inability to compromise.

"How's your lip?" He asks as you set your overnight bag on his small futon in the tiny living area the solo dorms come with.

"It's fine. I think the bleeding stopped and everything," you smile, keeping it small so as not to pop open another split.

"You can take my bed. I got the futon," once again, his words are so kind and generous, but his tone is flat and bare.

"Don't be stupid. I'm your guest. You've..." You sneer at yourself in disgust as you prepare your next sentence. "You've done a lot for me already."

"God," he stares at you with wide eyes.

"What?"

"It looked like you were gonna be sick from saying that out loud."

"Came pretty close, bud." You squint your eyes. It's clear to both of you that this is weird. It's awkward and even a little uncomfortable. He's done so much for you, yes, and you do feel it outweighs all the innocent hell you gave each other, but where do you go from here?

"So, now what? I sleep here. We go to tomorrow's lectures. Then, I just go back to normal?" You don't want to insinuate that you expect him to play bodyguard forever, but it would be kind of nice. You lie the futon into its flat, bed position as you ask.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there. 'Night." Billy climbs into his bed.

"Goodnight, Billy," you say, lowering the tough-gal front you attempt to keep up, usually when you aren't dealing with shit like this. Your voice sounds different when you let your walls down. It's sweeter. And the sound of it makes Billy's chest light.

In the safety of Billy's dorm, sleep finds you swiftly. You're out like a light, but Billy can't say the same. He lies with his eyes plastered to the ceiling. His mind is incoherent, bouncing all over from the possibility of the entire college sports program jumping him to the thought of you and him going back to "normal." It all started when he saw you, thought you were hot, but learned pretty quickly how self-assured you are. You would never be the easy catch he was used to and it pissed him off, igniting a multi-year feud between you. What if that feud were to end?

Billy lies on his back, his two muscular arms propped beneath the back of his head. He glances diagonally in the direction where you sleep. You're peacefully out, features slowly healing from the damage. He could stare at you all night, and that pisses him off too. He rolls his eyes and expels an exasperated sigh before rolling over, hoping that keeping his back faced in your direction will help shield him from the ambiguous thoughts invading his mind.

The next day, you're awake long before him, and to avoid overstepping, you rush through your morning hygiene routine and begin to reset the futon. You're as quiet as possible, but the second your fingertips graze the doorknob, Billy stirs.

"No," he says, wiping a hand over his face to rub the sleep away. "Just give me a minute. We'll go together." He sounds annoyed. You shake your head, dropping yourself down onto the futon while you wait for him to wake up.

"It's really no rush. I gotta get back across campus to get ready anyways." You call to him as he brushes his teeth in the small bathroom.

"I know you do. I'll drive you, just give me a minute," he waves away your excuses to leave without him, his voice becoming a little harsh as he repeats his request for more time. You know walking across campus isn't a treacherous walk. It's long, sure, but not unmanageable. What's really at stake is you running into anyone from the basketball team. And while that's your main concern, Billy has his own selfish reasons for wanting to keep you around. She's nice to look at, he tells himself, but it's more than that.

He walks from one end of the dorm to the other, wearing nothing but a dark grey pair of boxers. He's so lean and huge with well-toned muscles. He must spend a lot of time in the old weight room. You begin to wonder if Andy's in the hospital or not. Your eyes travel from his broad shoulders down to the V shape at his waist. You're unsure if it's your newfound ability to see him as a person, or maybe a trauma bond, but this man has you feeling out of character.

"Alright, car." He points out the door, using his primitive two-word command to instruct you to get into his car. He's still waking up.

"Billy, you know I could've just come back by myself, right? You didn't have to get up so early." You're the first to break the sleepy morning silence in the car. He looks at you like you've suggested possibly the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard.

"I know that. That's stupid. You're too trusting." Billy stares straight ahead through his black sunglasses.

"I guess," you shrug, not taking anything he says too seriously. How could you after all these years? He pulls into the Women's dorm lot and the two of you approach your personally decorated dorm room door. To your horror, the doorknob opens with ease. You forgot to lock it. A wary breath falls down your chest as you squeeze your eyes shut, grounding yourself before opening the door. Billy's confused until he finally sees inside. It's just as you suspected. The entire room, top to bottom, is trashed- thoroughly.

"What the fuck?" Billy inserts himself in front of you, taking a few steps inside to further assess the damage. His eyes narrow in anger as he catalogs every broken picture frame and demolished knick-knack. You seemed to have had a lot of curiosities and oddities, all of which were destroyed on your equally ruined floor.

"Oh, Jesus fucking Christ, I'm gonna lose it," you whisper, exasperated. You place your fingers on your temples and apply gentle pressure in hopes that it'll do any fucking thing for the way you're about to break the fuck down right now. "They want me to fuckin' lose it." Your voice is nearly inaudible.

"Hey, okay. Don't... Lose it. Let's go find 'em and beat the fuck out of 'em." Billy grins, still bloodthirsty. It's as if defending you almost feels like having you.

"I'm gonna get dressed. I'm gonna fix my fucking hair and makeup. And we're gonna go to our goddamn morning classes. This afternoon, we will figure out which one of them is getting their mom's severed middle finger in the mail."

"Sure thing, Killer Klown. That's not at all an overreaction." Billy shakes his head, laughing at your misfortune, though he does feel for you. You disappear into your restroom. It's miraculously, for the most part, untouched. You do a quick version of your usual big, glamour hair and slap on your makeup. It feels good to look like you again, even with the scabs and colorful bruises threatening to peek through the foundation. When you return to the common area, looking and feeling more like yourself, you radiate a type of glow. Billy catches himself in the very initial stage of staring but quickly nips that in the bud. You hardly notice.

"I guess I'm ready. You walking me to class, big guy?" You ask, teasingly.

"I am."

"Listen, I really appreciate everything you've done for me, but this isn't nes-"

"Y/N, have you looked at your dorm? Do you see how every single thing you own is destroyed? Stop being an idiot." His harsh words carry an air of motivation with them as he scolds you.

"Fine. But you're gonna have to pick up the pace or something," you snap your fingers repeatedly, in a circle to show him it's time to leave, now. He sighs, standing and leading the way out the door.

He walks you to your first lecture and waits outside for the entire hour. You don't know, but he actually doesn't have any classes today. He just knew you'd make a big deal out of it if you knew he was going any more out of his way than he already is. All 60 minutes drag by painfully slow, but all the while, Billy notices a few familiar faces casting passing glances into the building, only to suddenly change direction when their eyes meet his. He huffs out a satisfied sigh.

"Don't even think about it," he whispers, staring out the small door window. He glances at the clock, and just a moment before the lecture hall dismisses, he steps outside and waits for the crowd. After a handful of peers pass by, he then walks inside, keeping up his ruse.

"Oh, just in time, I guess," you say, meeting him in the middle of the breezeway as if he'd come from the other end of the college.

"As always," Billy sighs, unbothered, indifferent. You don't mind. It's a peaceful shift from his usual behavior before everything went down. The two of you step out the door and immediately, your eyes meet Andy's. He is standing around his car with his goons. They're all staring, not at Billy, at you. An intimidation tactic that might've worked before, had you not been walking next to a brick wall of a man. As the two of you strut past the bitter sportsmen, you hear Andy decide to pipe up.

"Told you she was a slut. It's already happening," he laughs and his teammates join in. You are unfazed by this sort of insult. Before the trauma at the hands of Andy that you'll now have to work through, you've always been a confident, self-assured person. At least that's all you'd allow anyone to believe. You shake your head at the insult, but when you look beside you, Billy's nowhere to be seen.

"That's pretty bold Andy. How're you healing? Doctor already tell you it's safe to get your shit rocked again?" Billy smiles sadistically as he stalks up to Andy. His crew of bench warmers seems to tighten up, taking a few steps closer, surrounding Andy. Billy can't hold back his laughter.

"Are you guys gonna jump me?" He asks, taunting, grinning as he does. "You think it's gonna be easy because there are so many of you?" Billy's only getting closer by the second, and the confidence of most of the players begins to waver. "Do you think I'll stop if I get my hands on you a second time?" Billy's icy blue eyes are dark with rage, almost black in the right lighting. They bore into Andy's and the two men fall silent.

Eventually, Andy's the one to back down. As expected, of course. And from the look on his face, you'd think he'd just been mugged and told his mom died. Billy smiles, tongue between his teeth as he watches the team climb into their cars. They have a visitors game, so you won't have to deal with them for the next 48 hours at least. As Billy returns to where you wait for him on the sidewalk, he wraps a protective arm around your shoulder. You're visibly jarred by this action, but Billy just stares straight ahead, leading you back to your dorm. He's wearing a self-satisfied grin as each and every busybody on campus whispers when they see the two of you.

Billy's a known bachelor and you're a known bitch. Even his more reoccurring hookups never got the public treatment. And you, fuck you're mean sometimes. Andy liked that about you. You'd be mean to anyone but him, but you guess it just stopped being enough. Even you and Andy weren't exactly "public" with your opposing schedules. You'd only ever been seen together at parties.

You finally reach your room and Billy leans against your counter, silently smiling at you as if he expects you to say something.

"What?" You ask, already starting the clean-up process.

"Just thought a 'thank you' would be in order." He shrugs.

"Thank you, Billy. Please hand me the broom," you groan, pointing to the tiny closet in the kitchen area. He rolls his eyes and carries the broom over to you. You're picking up the larger pieces of shattered glass and placing them into a small trashcan, hoping to make sweeping easier.

"Careful," Billy says as he notices a crack in the shard you're holding. His warning didn't reach you in time though, and the piece snapped, catching the upper part of your palm, slicing it open. "Jesus fucking-" Billy drops the broom and you follow him to the counter where he tears a wad of paper towels off the roll and shoves them into your hand. He stares at you with a straight face, almost like a disappointed parent. You stare back, blinking.

"What?" You ask, daring him to give you a hard time or risk being kicked out of your domicile.

"Nothing. Just getting tired of having to play doctor for you all the time." You release a huff and he smiles, a little sweeter than before.

(Do we want a part 2? Do we still read angst or are we all into smut rn? Maybe sex next chapter. idk.)

#stranger things 4 #stranger things fanfiction #billy hargrove #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargove #billy hargrove angst #who did this to you #angst #stranger things #revenge #who did this to you trope #billy is mean #but also not #billy hargrove x reader #tw violence #tw domestic violence #tw dv #graphic violence #billy hargrove x y/n #stranger things angst

[munsonluhvr]

MOTH TO A FLAME

pairing: exbf! eddie munson x popular!exgf! reader. word count: 1.1k warnings: smut (18+), cheating, not spell checked at all lol - this story is based on the song 'moth to a flame' by the weeknd. you can find it here

✮ find part 2 here

In a slow rhythm, you grind against Eddie Munson’s cock, the feeling of him filling you up is nearly euphoric. You’re in Eddie’s van, nestled discreetly in the large backside of the vehicle. His large, rough, ring-covered  hands are placed on your hips, guiding you in the manor he likes. Sweat compiles on your chest and hairline, the efforts of riding Eddie beginning to impact your stamina. Eddie notices your energy begin to falter and is quick to swiftly flip you over, changing your position to missionary.

You sigh softly, half from relief and half from pleasure as Eddie’s cock sinks into your cunt. Your fingers find their way into his hair, bringing in face to hover over yours. Eddie wastes no time stroking into you at an even pace, just the way he knows you like it. Your lips maneuver their way to Eddie’s, and you combine your mouths together, a soft moan escaping before they seal together.  

When you kiss Eddie, you feel pleasure and an overwhelming feeling of guilt. To be clear, Eddie is your ex, breaking up with him nearly a half a year ago. You now have a new boyfriend, Andy who plays on the basketball team, but you consistently find yourself in the arms of Eddie, sneaking away in the dark of the night to Eddie’s trailer, or hiding from the sunlight in the depths of his van. In the day, you stand beside Andy, playing the role of the perfect, loyal girlfriend who cheers him on charismatically at basketball games. In the evening you’re Eddie’s personal slut.

As if Eddie can read your mind, which you’re convinced he can, he slows his pace, taking the time to bend down to your ear. “Do you think he knows?” 

You know exactly who Eddie is talking about. “What?” 

Eddie rolls his eyes, knowing your game of avoidance too well.  “Do you think he knows you call me when he sleeps to come pick you up and fuck you?” 

You hate being confronted by Eddie about your wrongdoings, not that he’d ever bully you about them since he knows that could cause you to never call him again. You know it’s wrong and Eddie does too. But Eddie will show up, pulling you away from Andy, anytime you ask; he’d do anything to have you back as his girlfriend, as his. Sometimes, Eddie just likes to nudge you a little, silently asking you to reconsider your relationship with “that Andy guy” Eddie normally says. 

“Can we not talk about that right now?” You ask, your eyes working hard not to roll back in your head as Eddie begins to pick up his stroke pace. “I know, I’m a bad person, I’m fucking my ex while I’m dating someone else.” 

Eddie feels a smile pulling at his lips, though he tries not to cringe when you refer to him as your ex. Eddie decides to drop it, at least for the moment. To distract you, Eddie moves away from your face, leaving a trail of kisses that lead to your tits. With one of his hands, he cups one, letting it tongue flick across your nipple. Your back arches, your legs twitch, as he works his mouth on your assets. “Eddie, fuck, everything feels so good.” Eddie smiles against your skin, loving your praise and the way he can make you feel good. ‘Can Andy do that?’ Eddie thinks to himself before shaking the thought out of his head. 

In your abdomen, you feel a knot form in your stomach, the sign that you’re on the brink of orgasming. Eddie, too, feels the sensation that signals he’s close too; your time on top, riding Eddie, did a number on him as he had to hold himself back from finishing several times. 

Your legs tighten around Eddie’s waist, bringing his cock deeper inside of you, and you begin to writher underneath him. In only a few strokes, you cum, hard, around Eddie’s cock, triggering Eddie to finish too, filling your cunt with white, sticky ropes of his seed. Your breath shallows as your body works to recollect the breath and energy that’s been wiped out of you. 

Eddie lay’s next to you, brushing a strand of hair that clings to your forehead off your face. “Now can we talk about it?” 

You turn your head over to Eddie, a disappointed look on your face. “Eddie, why? Nothing is going to change.” 

Eddie frowns, lifting himself up onto his elbow. “Why not? You’re telling me Andy can make you come that hard?” 

You open your mouth to speak but close it. The answer is no, Andy can’t make you come that hard, but telling Eddie that would only fuel his efforts to get you to break up with Andy. 

“So, we’re just going to keep sneaking around? As if Andy will never figure out why you’re completely missing from your house and unreachable by phone several times a week.” Eddie says, shaking his head. “Why can’t you just break up with him since you spend more time with me anyway? I know you’re going to say he’s good for you and all your friends like him more then they like me but save me the bullshit and tell me the truth.” 

You sigh, sitting up to find your clothes to throw back on. “Eddie, it’s just complicated.” You say, slipping your panties on, your pants, and your shirt. You stuff your bra into your bag, not feeling like putting in on. As you put on your shoes, Eddie’s fingers travel down your bare arms, creating goosebumps across your skin. “I know it’s my fault,” Eddie hums, the pad of his thumb brushing against your arm, “-that we broke up. I promise to be better for you if you give me another chance, y/n.” 

One thing you know is that Eddie never breaks a promise. You grab your backpack that sits in the passenger seat and sling it over your shoulder. You offer him a small smile, knowing you’ll end up with Eddie again, some day. You use the lever on the door of the van to open the sliding door. “Same time tomorrow?” you say, hoping Eddie will comply. 

As usual, Eddie nods, knowing one day you’ll come around. Besides, he has to admit that sneaking around being your punk ass new boyfriends back excites him as if it’s some sort of revenge against Andy. Sending you to hang out with your boyfriend while you’re filled with Eddie’s come might as well be an early birthday present for Eddie. “Same time tomorrow,” Eddie says, slipping his hellfire club t-shirt on. 

#stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson #eddie munson fan fiction #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x you #eddie munson smut #eddie munson drabble

[once-upon-an-imagine]

Always On My Mind - Steve Harrington

A/N: omg! I have no idea how this happened 😊 I finally got this out and I really, really hope you like it as much as the first one! thank you so much for all the love (and for the patience!)

Warnings: reader is hurt (like badly hurt) but it's only mentioned at the beginning, I think that's it but let me know if I missed anything. also, this is a sequel to You Keep Me Hanging On so I would advise you read that one first (link at the bottom)

Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things :) gif isn’t mine :D  

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Always On My Mind

If I made you feel second-best I'm so sorry I was blind You were always on my mind You were always on my mind

You were trying extremely hard to focus. It was over. You had made it. You were back at Hawkins and you made it to the hospital. Max was hurt. And so was Eddie. Although his injury wasn’t as bad because you ran out to help him. You saw the nurses take Max one way and Eddie the other way. You turned around and saw Robin comforting Erica and making sure they would check her as well since that idiot Andy basically attacked her. And on the other side, you saw Steve. He was trying his best to calm Lucas and Dustin down. You blinked a few times and you tried to make your way to them but…

“You’re bleeding!” you heard Nancy’s voice next to you. You opened your mouth to say something but blood came out. “Oh my God!” Nancy grabbed you when you were about to hit the floor. “STEVE!”

You tried to stay up with Nancy’s help and you saw Steve, Dustin, and Lucas look your way. Steve felt his heart drop the second he saw you. You had blood on your stomach and you were trying to hold yourself up. You heard him screaming your name as he ran over to you, to help you keep you up.

“Sweetheart, look at me!” he said, placing his hand on your cheek while you heard Dustin and Lucas screaming for someone to help them. “Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt? I asked you if you were hurt!” he said with a few tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I’m s-sorry” you before your eyes rolled to the back of your head and you almost collapsed on the floor but Steve quickly held you, screaming for a doctor to help as you passed out in his arms.

“HELP!”

Steve jumped awake on his bed and felt he was sweating cold. He placed his hand on his chest and he could feel his heart beating incredibly fast. He sat down on the bed and grabbed the glass of water on the nightstand to calm himself down.

It had been a few weeks after they came back from the UpsideDown. Max was still at the hospital, and you and Eddie had been staying with him. Mostly because Eddie was still kind of lying low since a lot of people still thought he was a murderer. And you, because your parents were out of town with his parents and cared about just as much that their daughter was in the hospital. He ran a hand through his hair and got out of his parents’ bed. He walked over to his room where you were staying and silently opened the door, sighing in relief when he saw you peacefully asleep. He closed the door and walked downstairs to the kitchen, where he found his other guest.

“Munson-”

“Jesus H. Christ!” Eddie jumped a little, turning around to see Steve. “You scared the shit out of me, man” he said, placing his hand on his chest as he held his crutch on his right hand.

“Um, what are you doing?” Steve asked confused.

“Well… I was just… a bit hungry” Eddie explained.

“Are you high?”

“Uh… would you be upset if I was?”

“No” Steve shrugged.

“Then yes, I am very much high, Harrington” he smiled politely at him. “You want some?” he asked, pointing at the joint on the counter.

“You know what? Yes” Steve said, grabbing it and taking a hit.

“Alright, now it’s a party” Eddie chuckled when Steve coughed a little. “You okay there, man?”

“Yeah, it’s just… been a while” he said. “Let me grab those for you” he said, walking over to the cabinet where Eddie was trying to reach for the chips.

“Thanks” Eddie said grabbing something to drink too and the brownies you had made earlier before the two of them walked to the living room. “So, what’s up?”

“What?” Steve asked, confused.

“Why can’t you sleep? Did you have another nightmare?”

“Yeah” Steve said, drinking his soda. “You?”

“Yep” Eddie said, grabbing the chips. “Those fucking bats really made a number on my leg man” he said, looking at the cast on his right foot. “You know… I may have not made it if it wasn’t for her, right?” Steve silently nodded. After you were taken by the doctor, Dustin confessed that you had gone out to help Eddie and the bats attacked you instead but you kept insisting he had it worse. “Was your nightmare about her?”

He had never talked about that moment after it happened. He had been glued to you the entire time, never leaving your side and taking care of your every need. He didn’t speak while you were out, which was about a day. And when you woke up, he yelled at you. He was so angry for you running out to help Eddie and he told you how reckless and careless you were. The two of you hadn’t spoken since, except for Steve letting you know you’ll be staying with him and asking every now and then if you needed anything.

“She fainted in my arms, man” Steve said. “There was blood coming out of her mouth and… her body and…” he closed his eyes. “I thought she was dead” he said, with his voice breaking a little. “I didn’t notice” he continued. “When we got to you and Dustin, she just said to help you and that you were bleeding horribly and that we needed to bring you back and then Max was even worse and…” he sighed. “And I didn’t see she was in pain” he said, sitting back. “How could I have been so stupid? And then when she wakes up instead of being glad that she’s gonna be okay I yelled at her!”

“Yeah, that was probably not your best move” Eddie chuckled as Steve placed his hands over his face and rested his elbows on his legs.

“She probably hates me now and I wouldn’t blame her” he said, brushing a hand through his hair.

“Seriously? You have to be dumber than I thought, Harrington” Eddie laughed. “She doesn’t hate you” he insisted and Steve looked at him. “Do you honestly think she’ll still be here if she hated you?”

“Well she’s hurt and-”

“And she doesn’t give a fuck about that. You and I know her well enough to know that she does whatever she wants. I told her to stay back and she didn’t listen to me. You told us to stay on the boat when we were at the lake and she didn’t care. Do you think she would stay here just because you told her to? She could go to Wheeler’s or Robin’s-”

“Maybe it’s because you’re here too. She’s worried about you-”

“Yeah, because that’s who she is. She would rather help get me and Max to the hospital before saying she was hurt too. Trust me, Harrington, that means nothing, man” he said, taking another puff of the joint.

“Well, since you seem to know so much and I don’t, why don’t you enlighten me, Munson, and tell me why you think she’s here” Steve glared at him a little.

“Isn’t it obvious?” he said, letting the smoke out. “Because of you” he simply said.

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Well, maybe, and I’m just thinking out loud here, she was waiting for you to tell her that you love her back?” he said, making Steve choke on the soda he was drinking.

“H-how do you-?”

“Know about that? She’s my friend, man. Unlike you, I didn’t yell at her and told her she was stupid for doing what she did. I thanked her for helping me and we talk all the time” he explained. “Unlike you, who has been avoiding her like the plague” he laughed.

“I have not!”

“Seriously, dude? Other than, ‘Do you need anything?’ and ‘Are you hungry?’ you’ve barely spoken to her” he explained.

“I was… trying to give her some space” Steve tried to reason with him.

“She doesn’t want space, man! God, you are so stupid!” he said, getting closer to him and hitting the back of his head.

“Ouch!”

“Snap out of it, man! I mean it! We went over this I told you when we were on the UpsideDown. For some reason, which, believe me, for the life of me, I still do not understand, that girl loves you. She loves you, man! She told you even though she thought you still loved Wheeler, do you understand how brave that shit is? And you still haven’t told her? You’re running away dude, and, do you know who never, ever rushes into anything and instead runs away from shit?”

“Cowards” Steve said, feeling even worse.

“Exactly. And whatever I’ve called you in the past, Harrington, you are no coward. So, what the fuck is it? Are you seriously still hung up on Nancy Wheeler-?”

“No! I am not in love with Nancy, okay?” Steve snapped.

“Then what the fuck is your problem, Steve?”

“Ugh!” he grunted. “I can’t believe I’m discussing this with Eddie Munson” he sighed.

“I’m gonna choose to take that as a compliment” Eddie smirked.

“Why do you even care? Wouldn’t you want me to screw up so you can be with her?”

“Whoa, dude where did you get that idea? We’re just friends” Eddie insisted.

“Really? Because the two of you seemed really close when we were on the UpsideDown, and you said ‘If I were you, I would not take her for granted, man. 'Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen. And if you let her go, someone else might not be so stupid’” he said, mocking Eddie’s voice.

“Okay, now I do take offense. I don’t sound like that” Eddie glared at him. “Look, I’m not blind. She’s pretty and she has a kickass personality. If she weren’t totally hung up on you, I might even think that I may have a chance and go for it. But it’s useless. She wants you for some reason. And it’s not like I’m in love with her like you are” he shrugged.

“Stop saying that!” Steve complained.

“Why? Aren’t you?” Eddie smirked. Steve took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair again.

“Look, the last time… I said that to anyone” he started. “It just… it didn’t go well” he told Eddie. “Like at all” he said sadly. “And I guess I’m just… scared that… she’s also going to realize that she can do a lot better than me and the same thing is going to happen” he said, sadly. “Maybe that’s it. I’m not meant to be with anyone. I don’t really deserve it-”

“Alright, stop being so dramatic” Eddie said, rolling his eyes. “First of all, I’m flattered that you think I’m a lot better than you” he smirked.

“I didn’t necessarily mean you-”

“And secondly, as much as you know that I hate to admit it… Dustin’s right man. You are a good dude. Trust me, I experienced first class of the asshole that was King Steve” he said, making Steve glare a little at him. “But, I don’t really see that guy anymore. I mean, you even took me in” he said. “You drive the kids every day to see Max. You drive Robin wherever she needs to go. You helped at the whole donation thing Mrs. Wheeler asked you to. You’ve come a long way, Stevie. And trust me, I’m not the only one who’s noticed” he said, making Steve smile just barely. “Stop being so hard on yourself, man. You deserve to be happy. And so does she” he told him.

“Thanks, man” Steve said, putting his drink up so Eddie would toast with him.

“Sure” he said, getting back to his seat. “Also, if you screw it up, I’m waiting a few months to make a move. Just letting you know now” he chuckled, making Steve glare at him but he laughed a little. Who would thought that King Steve and Eddie ‘the freak’ Munson would have ended up being friends?

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

“Hey” Steve heard your voice as you walked into the kitchen where he was making breakfast. He smiled when he saw you were wearing his yellow sweater.

“Good morning” he smiled nervously.

“Um, I hope you don’t mind I borrowed your sweater. I got cold in the middle of the night” you explained, sitting on one of the counter chairs.

“Let me help you-” Steve said, noticing your pained expression but you stopped him with your hand.

“I’ve got it” you smiled a little. “Thanks” you said. “So, where’s Eddie?” you asked, confused. He was usually up by now.

“Oh, he’s still asleep” Steve informed you and you simply nodded.

Not only were they up very late last night, Eddie said, he would give them some space so he could finally talk to you. He was exhausted but there was no way he wouldn’t be there to help you.

“You know, I had no idea you knew how to cook” you said, all of the sudden. He had been mostly ordering food for the three of you. And you had cereal or frozen waffles for breakfast, unless Eddie was in the mood to cook, who was actually not that bad.

“Um, full disclosure, I have no idea if they’re gonna be any good” he laughed nervously.

“Would you like some help?”

“No-!” he quickly said, turning to you. “Um… you should be resting. I’ve got it” he insisted. “Do you need anything?” he asked, going back to the food and cursing himself for repeating the same question he asked you all the time as Eddie pointed out.

“Um, I’m okay” you told him. “I was actually wondering if um… maybe you can take me to my house later today?” you asked, making Steve drop the spatula in his hand and he turned to look at you.

“Y-you want to go home?” he asked, feeling his heart breaking. Had he missed his chance?

“If you can’t take me is fine. Is not that far. I can probably walk-”

“No!” he said, walking over to you and grabbing your hands in his.

“No?” you asked, confused. Steve looked like he was about to cry. Or throw up. Or both. “Steve, are you okay?”

“Okay. Here it goes” he said, looking away. “I’m sorry” he blurted out. “I am so sorry about everything I did. I am the stupidest man on Earth for making you feel like you didn’t matter to me” he continued. “I am so sorry for yelling at you when you woke up. I was just so angry at myself because I didn’t notice you were hurt. And you didn’t feel like you could tell me and I am so sorry for that!”

“Steve-”

“No, please, let me finish” he interrupted you. “Look, I know that you were upset about the whole Nancy thing and you have every right to” he said. “But, I need you to know that I don’t have feelings for Nancy. Not anymore. She’s just my friend” he insisted. “And…” he sighed. “D-do you remember the first time I called you? And asked you if you could come get me and you stayed with me?”

“I remember” you nodded.

“I wanted to call Robin” he admitted and you frowned, confused. “I have no idea why but I dialed your number and… I felt really embarrassed because I didn’t want you to see me like that. But you came and… you stayed with me and… I knew then” he said in a serious tone.

“Knew what?” you asked, still confused about this whole speech.

“I knew that I was falling for you” he admitted, making your heart flutter. “I know that I was an asshole in high school and that you didn’t like me, even if we’ve known each other our whole lives. And then, I finally got the chance to actually get to know you, and… you were the best person I met. You were there when I broke up with Nancy and when Billy Hargrove beat the shit out of me. You were always there. You stayed with me after the Starcourt thing because you didn’t want me to be alone and you helped me whenever we had job interviews and… you always make me feel like I am worth something and I am so sorry if I ever made you feel otherwise because… you are the most important person in my life. And I am so sorry that I didn’t tell you this sooner” he kept going, not noticing the small smile that was forming on your face. “I’m sorry I yelled at you when you woke up. I know I already said that but… I was just so scared, I thought I had lost you and… I honestly don’t think that I could live without you in my life” he said, with a few tears running down his face.

“Steve-” you said, placing your hand on his face.

“I love you” he finally said, feeling an enormous weight being lifted off his shoulders. “I love you so much, sweetheart. And I am so sorry it took me so long to tell you I was just being a coward because…” he sighed. “You know what happened when I said that to Nancy” he said, looking down at your linked hands. “It destroyed me and… if it’s possible, I love you so much more but… I didn’t think that I was deserving enough of you so… I was running away” he said, looking back at you. “I love you so much and I am so sorry. If you’ll still have me, I would love to be with you, but… if you still want to go home, I respect that too” he said, smiling sadly.

“What? Steve, I was just asking if you could take me home to get more clothes” you explained with a sweet smile, making Steve widen his eyes.

“W-what?”

“But now that I know that you love me” you smirked a little at him and he laughed a little, throwing his head back and you saw him blush.

“Well, I don’t care. I said it. I love you” he repeated.

“I would like to jump over this counter and kiss you right now, but I’m pretty sure you would get mad and say that I’m hurt and that I shouldn't-” you were cut off by Steve walking over to you and leaning down to kiss you.

You had kissed Steve before but it wasn’t like this. Something was different. You didn’t know how it could but it was even more perfect. His arms wrapped carefully around your waist, bringing you closer.

“I love you so much” he repeated, smiling when he saw the look on your face.

“I love you too” you said before he kissed you again. “And, for the record, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was hurt” you admitted. “I didn’t think it was that bad” you told him.

“You still should have told me” he said, brushing your cheek with his thumb.

“I know” you smiled sheepishly. “I’m sorry I scared you” you told him. “And that it’s making you have nightmares” you said.

“How did you-? Did Eddie tell you?”

“No” you smiled. “I know you, Steve” you said, as if it was obvious.

“How have you been sleeping?” he asked, worriedly.

“Well, if I’m being honest… I think it would be better if… maybe… you could stay with me?” you asked with a small smile. “If that’s okay?”

Steve hugged you closer to him and kissed your temple. “Whatever you want, sweetheart” he said, kissing you again.

“Not that I’m not loving this moment, but I think the food is burning” you said, making Steve let go of you instantly.

“What?”

“Are you two still figuring shit out or are you together already? I’m hungry!” you heard Eddie’s voice coming from the stairs, making you laugh.

“You can come down, Eddie” you said, as he hopped over to the kitchen with his crutches. “Although as for the food, it doesn’t look good” you said, as Steve tried to salvage what was left of the breakfast he was making.

“Aw, Stevie, you went through all this trouble for me?”

“Don’t flatter yourself, Munson” he said, tossing the ruined food. “So… who’s in the mood to go out to eat?”

“This is who you really wanna be with, princess?” Eddie asked you, making you laugh as Steve glared at him, and punched his arm.

“I think it’s sweet that he tried” you said, smiling at Steve.

“Thank you, love” he said, kissing you. 

The End

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[Part 1]

A/N: sooo, I really hope you loves like it, and there is a tiny chance that I might do another version where the reader chooses Eddie, but no promises! xD  

tags: @nerdygamingartist , @booksandlighters , @vilentia , @plk-18

#stranger things #stranger things imagine #steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington oneshot

[boxofbonesfic]

Title: Return to Sender [5 of 7]

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Dark! Andy Barber x Reader, Ari Levinson x Reader

Summary: Andy Barber promised he would never let you go, and come hell or high water, he's going to keep that promise.

Warnings: Dubcon/Noncon, Kidnapping, Minor Violence, Gaslighting, Basement Wife Trope, Manipulation, Stalking, Obsessive behavior, Possessive behavior, Smut, MORE TAGS TO BE ADDED

A/N: 👀 is… is anyone still there? i promised i’d update this this weekend, and i delivered. an hour before midnight, but i delivered. 😅 i know it’s been a while for this fic, but it hasn’t been forgotten about. i really hope you all enjoy this latest installment, and please don’t hesitate to let me know what you think! as always, comments are great, reblogs are golden. thank you for reading, and mind the warnings. ❤️ divider by @firefly-graphics

 Where am I?

You stare blearily at the distant ceiling, dull and rusting metal beams criss-crossing over exposed brick. You reach out for Dove, and when your fingers meet empty air, your throat tightens as you remember. 

Pronge walking away with your baby, and Ari—

You sit up, your fingers knotted in the thin blanket. The repurposed garage office is still and silent, the springs creaking quietly underneath you. The air smells like old motor oil, singed rubber and citrus-scented antiseptic, and it burns your nostrils. You’re almost afraid to shatter the fragile silence with the sound of your movement, but it can’t be helped as you shove your feet back into your sneakers. The office is long abandoned, the desks all pushed up against the sides of the room to make space for the bed.

The hallway is slightly better, boxes of papers and car parts lining both sides, lit by old yellow florescent bulbs that give off less light than they should. There’s a dusty, unlit neon sign that reads Gary’s Auto-body, leaning against the wall. Down the hall, you can see that the light is on in the garage proper, this one bright and brilliant white. You squint as you pass through the doorway, spots dancing in front of your eyes as they slowly adjust to the light. 

In its previous life, this place had been a car mechanic’s garage, but now it serves as something like a speak-easy operating room. The car lifts have been mostly dismantled, and sitting on the concrete in the rusted outline of where they used to be are two operating tables. Ari is on one of them, speaking quietly to the man winding a length of beige bandaging around his right shoulder. 

Zemo. Ari called him Zemo.

“Mouse, you’re up.” You cover your mouth with both hands to stop the surprised squeak from reaching him. Guiltily, you peer around the door frame, waiting for a reprimand that doesn’t come. The “doctor” regards you with cold, calculating eyes. 

“So this is the young woman Mr. Barber is tearing the city apart to find,” he says. “How nice to finally meet you.” Andy’s name sends a cold shiver down your spine, and you clutch yourself. Zemo’s welcome feels less like kindness and more like tolerance. It makes you wonder how long you’ll be staying here. 

“You know Andy?” You ask, careful to keep your face as neutral as you can manage. 

Zemo scowls. “Well enough to know we do not get along.” He shakes his head, before regarding you with a cold smile. “Your husband has just as many enemies as he does friends.” Beside him, Ari sits up on the table with a pained grunt, swinging his legs over the side. 

“We can trust him, Mouse.” Ari offers you a watery smile. Nervously, you step closer, skirting around the now defunct counter as you attempt to give Zemo as wide a berth as you can manage. He either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, cleaning his tools with a cloth before dropping them with a loud, metallic pap into the metal tray next to the table. 

“Are you okay?” You ask him in a quiet voice as you approach, fingers dancing nervously around the gauze. You shake your head, closing your eyes as you blow out an exasperated breath. “I mean, I know you’re not okay, but—” Ari places a warm hand over your own, a quiet laugh rumbling in his chest. 

“I’m okay.” 

“Lucky for you Pronge is a terrible shot.” Zemo quips. “He missed bone.”

“See?” Ari says, squeezing your hand tight before letting go. “I’m just fine.” 

“You’re not fine. You have a six millimeter hole in you.”  

“Semantics.” 

“Keep activity to a minimum. I shouldn’t have to tell you this,” Zemo replies dryly. “And keep it clean, I’m not going to do it for you. This isn’t a hospital.” You watch him pack up his tools, ferrying them over to the deep sink on the other side of the room. Ari slides off of the table with a grunt, and you watch him press his lips together as he stands upright, gritting his teeth against the pain. 

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.” Ari mutters, cutting his eyes at Zemo over his shoulder. “Six millimeters.” The doctor tosses him a worn looking cloth sling. Ari tries to fit it over his shoulder, and you rush to help him. “Thanks, Mouse.” Your cheeks warm with an uncomfortable heat. “I could have done it myself.” 

“This is all my fault,” you mumble angrily, shaking your head. “I have to do something.” You step back from him, tucking your chin. He rests a warm, comforting hand on your shoulder. 

“No it’s not.” 

“If I—If I hadn’t—” Guilt is an achingly heavy cowl about your sagging shoulders. 

“Mouse, what good is this going to do you?” The gentleness in his touch makes you flinch.

“As much as I am enjoying this conversation,” Zemo clears his throat. “I have my own wife and son to be getting back to.” You watch as he places his cleaned tools back into his bag. “Do remember what I said about your… hole.” He gestures to Ari’s injured arm with a grimace. “I’m rather keen on not amputating.” 

“You and me both.” Ari says. The two of you watch as he makes his way over to the front of the shop, pulling the metal garage door up enough to slip underneath it. “What time tomorrow?”

“Noon.” 

The garage door slams down hard onto the concrete, and then there is silence. You stand there awkwardly, twisting your t-shirt in your restless hands. They’re so used to holding the baby, without her sure weight in them they feel… useless. 

You feel useless. Adrift. 

And it isn’t just Dove—it’s everything. Despite what Ari says, you know this is your fault. He’d never have been hurt if you hadn’t been so fucking helpless. And it’s your own fault, you’d let your guard down, let Andy back inside, let him make a home inside your head, and it was your fault. 

“What are you thinkin’ there, Mouse?” Ari’s voice interrupts the self-depreciating internal monologue running rampant in your head. “I hope it’s about getting some sleep, you need it.” Again, his earnestness puts you on edge. You don’t know what to do with it—it feels alien to you now, almost like you’d prefer Andy’s smug cruelty—at least then you know what to expect. 

You don’t want to admit that you’re blaming yourself, thinking about all the ways you could have prevented this exact course of events just by being better. 

“Yeah,” you lie. “I’m exhausted.” If anything, you’re too awake, recalling last night’s events with perfect clarity. You can’t even look at Ari as the two of you silently make your way back to the repurposed offices, shuffling along beside him as your insides squirm. You feel too much to go to sleep, so many warring desires it feels like you’re being torn apart from the inside out.

You suppose that’s one thing you sort of miss about Andy—you didn’t have to think, didn’t have to feel. He did it all for you. You arrive back at your “room”, fidgeting nervously before you cross the threshold. You don’t think you can sleep in here now, now that the adrenaline has worn off. Now that the terror has been waylaid by your other earthly concerns. 

 Ari notes your hesitation. 

“I can stay with you util you fall asleep, if you don’t think you can.” 

You duck your head, shaking it emphatically. “I should be looking after you,” you reply, shooting him a look over your shoulder. “You should, um, rest.” Ari looks around, raising an eyebrow. Oh. There’s only one other bed—and it’s current occupant is currently snoring so loud you can hear it in here. 

“You sleep here, and I’ll—” You look around. “I’ll sleep in one of the rolly-chairs or something.” He laughs softly at your sudden determination. 

“You know I’m not letting you sleep on chairs, Mouse.” Ari rests a hand on your shoulder. “You take the bed.” 

“You got shot, Ari!” You hiss. “I-I-I can’t—”

He holds up his hands placatingly, like he can see you working yourself up. Hell, he probably can. 

“Okay.” He threads the fingers of his good hand through his blond hair. “I’ll sleep on one side, you on the other. Fair?” 

“Y-yes. Fair.” Your words shock the both of you, and you feel your face heat as he regards you with a look of pleasant surprise before you look down at your feet. 

“You don’t have to agree if you aren’t comfortable, Mouse. You know that. I wouldn’t—”

“I know.” You grip your own forearms tightly as you speak, like you’re afraid saying the words out loud will make them untrue—like speaking the name of your demon will bring him down upon you. “You’re not Andy.” 

Ari takes the left side of the bed, and the springs creak under his weight. You crawl in beside him, holding yourself as stiff as you possibly can to avoid even brushing him by accident. The truth is, you are scared—but not of Ari. 

And that frightens you, too. 

He’s a man, a stranger, wearing a face too similar to the one you’re running from. Now, though, when you’re brave enough to peek at him, you see Ari—not Andy. And the longer you’re here, the clearer you see him.

You lie there in the dark, your arms held painfully stiff over your chest as you search the dark with wide, glassy eyes. The ceiling is far enough above you that your brain begins to construct patterns and shapes on it’s popcorn-textured surface. Grinning faces, tall, shadowy figures—

“Mouse, are you sleeping?” 

You hesitate. “…No.” 

“Go to sleep.” You swallow against the thick lump in your throat, blinking back hot tears. 

“It’s… It’s hard without Dove.” It’s so silent without the baby, the darkness uncomfortably quiet without the sound of her sleepy burble. She’s probably awake right now, wailing for you. You press the heels of your palms against your eyes like you’re trying to hold the tears in. 

“I know.” The mattress creaks, and you feel Ari’s weight shift. The weight of your loss settles in on you, then, the crushing vacuum of your daughter’s absence sucking the air out of your lungs as you gasp for it. You can’t keep quiet anymore, your hiccoughing breaths rising in pitch until you’re sobbing, hot tears streaming down your cheeks to soak your hair and the thin pillow beneath. 

“Hey, hey, come here.” Ari’s touch is hesitant. He lets his fingers linger on your shoulders before he hugs you, like he’s waiting for you to rebuke him. You don’t. Instead, you curl into his chest, your wails muffled by his body as you tangle your fingers in his over-shirt. You cry so hard it hurts, your throat raw and aching. 

Ari’s hands don’t stray. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t murmur false platitudes or make promises he knows he won’t be able to keep. He just…holds you, his breath steady and heartbeat slow and even under your ear. 

And then, finally, you fall asleep.

—

In the light of day, Irene looks terrible. Her left eye is swollen black and purple, a patchwork of burst blood-vessels and yellow bruises spread out over  cheek. The other side of her face is not much better, the other eye open but blood red, and her nose swollen. It’s obvious she took a beating, a bad one. Still, she seems to be in higher spirits than last night as she shovels the last of her cereal into her mouth. You’re doing the same thing, hungrily crunching down the contents of your own bowl. 

“We need to talk about next steps.” Irene draws the back of her hand across her mouth, her one good eye focused on you. “We need to move.” 

“I’m not going anywhere without Dove.” 

“That isn’t an option anymore.” 

You clench your hands into fists on the table. “I’m. Not. Leaving.” 

“We will figure out a way to get her back, but right now? You cannot go back to Boston, he is never going to let you go, do you understand that?” It’s like you’re speaking two different languages, talking around one another in dizzying circles. You shove yourself away from the foldout table, knocking over your plastic chair. 

“I’m not fucking leaving without my daughter!” You haven’t felt like this in months, and something about it feels freeing as the hot rage pools in your chest.  No, it isn’t that you haven’t felt it, you haven’t let yourself feel it. Anger was hopeless with Andy, firm and stone faced in the hurricane of your rage until you exhausted yourself, your freedom, your life still frustratingly far out of your reach. 

You storm away from the table, kicking aside one of Zemo’s silver trays, and his tools skitter across the concrete. Behind you is the sound of Ari’s voice. 

“I’ll talk to her.” 

You don’t know where you’re going, but you know you need to be away from them. Alone. The bathroom is on the far side of the garage bay, and you slam the door behind you, your chest heaving. You can’t leave without Dove, you won’t. 

You won’t abandon her. 

You grip the porcelain edges of the sink hard as you blink back fresh tears. You turn on the water with a fierce jerk of the knob, and begin to rinse last night’s tears from your face. This is the cleanest room in the building, fresh towels stacked on on the shelves, and medical supplies arranged neatly in the glass cases across from the standing shower. 

It’s probably the only room Zemo actually uses. 

As you’re drying your face, a knock sounds at the door, and you glare at it as you huff. 

“What?”

“It’s me. Can I come in?” You chew your lip. 

“Fine.” 

You unlatch the lock, and fold your arms across your chest as it opens. Ari peers around the door. 

“Hey.” 

“Hey.” You repeat, and he chuckles, stepping fully inside as the door swings shut behind him. “I’m not leaving without Dove.” You say it firmly, watching his shoulders sag with his deep sigh. “It’s not happening.” 

“Mouse. Look at me.” Reluctantly, you drag your gaze from the air over his shoulder. “Your husband—”

“We’re not married.” You spit, and Ari rolls his eyes at the technicality. 

“He’s dangerous, Mouse. You know that.” Ari places gentle hands on your shoulders. “You know that as soon as you step foot back in that house that he will never, ever let you go again.” Your stomach twists at his words.

“I can get out again.” 

“Will you want to?” His bluntness feels like a slap across the face, and though Ari hadn’t struck you—would never—your cheeks smart anyway. You know what he’s implying—Andy scrambled your head all up inside, and half the time now you don’t know up from fucking down.

But it still hurts to know he knows. Knows how changed you are, even though he never got to see the before, just the after.  

“Fuck you!” You snarl. “I am not leaving her! And if you won’t help me get her back, then I’ll—I’ll go back my fucking self!” For the first time since you’d met him, Ari actually looks angry at this, his eyes darkening beneath his furrowed brows. “If you don’t care about her—”

“I let Leah go back.” It takes you a moment to realize who he’s talking about, what he means. “I let Leah go back, and then I had to bury them both.” Ari’s hand is a pale, trembling fist on the bathroom sink. His next words are hoarse. “I didn’t know they made coffins so small.” 

“Ari…”

“I care about Dove.” The words are heavy, and you hate that you know he means them. “We are going to get her back.” His eyes are shiny, but he doesn’t cry. “I fucking swear we will get her back, but you are not going to do that. Okay? You’re not.” 

“You promise?” Your mouth trembles. 

“I promise.” Ari wraps his pinky around yours, holding your entwined fingers up at eye level. “And you aren’t going back.”  

“I-I won’t.”

“Promise.” His dark eyes burn so fiercely you want to look away. “Promise.” He repeats it firmly. 

“I promise.” 

And then he’s kissing you, cupping your chin with his good hand as he presses his lips desperately against your own. Your heart pounds in your ears as you go stiff in his arms. Ari breaks away, releasing you with a soft curse. 

“Fuck. I’m sorry, Mouse, I—I didn’t mean to do that, I just—” For once, he’s flustered, his cheeks ruddy beneath the shadow of his beard. Ari cards his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry.” 

The moment hangs between you in the air, held like a breath. 

Your body stays tensed, like you’re ready to fight, or run, like it remembers Andy’s strict instructions. Except… Andy isn’t here to deliver them himself. 

“It’s…” You don’t know what to say, hell, you don’t even know what you’re feeling. Everything is all mixed up, the emotions all biting the tails of the ones they’re chasing—you’re terrified, you’re exhilarated, you’re nauseous and scared and happy and—

“I’ll go. I should go.” Ari mutters the words more to himself than to you. You’re moving before you really mean to, leaning up on the tips of your toes to press a clumsy kiss on the corner of his mouth.

“I—I don’t want you to go.”  With a sigh, Ari melts against you, resting his forehead against yours.  You know you have done this before—many times, even just with Andy—but somehow there is a marked uncertainty as you lift your own hand to Ari’s face, stroking your thumb along his stubbled jawline. He hums, turning his face into your palm, and you feel the press of his lips. 

 Ari wraps his good arm around your waist, his fingers pressing into the meat of your hip through your pajama pants. His right arm flexes, his fist clenching and unclenches in the sling like he wants to move it, but he knows better. Instead, he buries his nose in your hair, the tips of his fingers creeping up beneath your t-shirt to stroke at your belly. You tense at his touch and then relax again, shivering. 

“You tell me to go, I go.” Ari repeats softly, nosing down the side of your jaw. “I won’t be angry.” You look for the pool of cold dread that usually sits in your belly whenever Andy touches you, the reluctant fear that you stamp down to please him but find it entirely absent. 

“You don’t have to make me happy, you don’t have to do what I want because I want it.” You have to stand on the tips of your toes to wrap your arms around Ari’s broad shoulders. There is undeniable excitement uncurling in your belly, warmth skipping under your skin at his touch. You want Ari to touch you.

“What if… it would make me happy?”

Ari huffs out a breathy laugh, his lips curving against your own. “That’s all I seem to want to do.” He takes your mouth again with a fervor that leaves you pleasantly breathless. Ari tangles his fingers in the curls at the nape of your neck, holding you still. His teeth tug at the weight of your lower lip and you gasp, opening for him. Ari tastes faintly of cinnamon sugar and something distinctly him that makes you shiver. 

“Been wanting to do that for a goddamn week.” He sighs the words against your mouth. He smooths his hand down the back of your neck, tracing a gentle finger along the length of your spine. You don’t know you’re holding your breath until you release is as his palm skirts over the curve of your ass. He chuckles. “Is this okay?”

“Y-yes.” Ari palms your ass in response and you gasp, tangling your fingers in his over-shirt. It feels strange to be asked what you want, to even consider your own feelings as worth listening to. Andy tells you what to want, what to think, how to feel—Ari simply…allows you to be. Just as you are. 

“I wanna touch you, Mouse,” he breathes. The admission sends a sharp bolt of electricity straight down your spine. “Can I?” You can’t avoid his eyes anymore, reluctantly meeting his gaze with your own. The words stick in your throat.

“You have to tell me, Mouse.” He strokes your trembling chin with the pad of his thumb. “I’m not him.”Andy always played at giving you choice, but you know Ari isn’t. That if you tell him to, he’ll walk away, and he won’t punish you for it. 

You close your eyes hard, pressing the lids shut till they hurt. You don’t want to think about Andy right now, don’t want to think about Dove without you—you just want this. It feels like you have to reach down your own throat to find it, pulling your own voice up and out through your mouth with force.

“Please?” 

Ari groans, plunging his hand into your loose sleep-pants to wrap around your thighs. He’s strong enough to lift you one-armed as you adjust. You wrap your legs around his waist as a reflex and he hums approvingly, his fingers sinking into the meat of your hips. 

The hard planes of his body press against yours, and your face heats as you think of the new weight that has settled around your hips and belly, but Ari does not seem to notice its presence, his fingers skimming appreciatively along your skin. You can feel the bulge of his cock pressing against your core, and the breathy, surprised noise you make in the back of your throat at the feel of it prompts a chuckle. 

Ari grips your hip hard as he takes a few long strides backwards until you feel cool tile beneath your back. He holds you there, pinned comfortably between his body and the wall as he grinds into you. He ruts against you with a groan. The thin, stretchy fabric between you offers little protection, considering, you can practically feel him throbbing through his zipper. 

“See, Mouse?” He says lowly. “All for you.” Ari releases you, and your feet have barely touched down on the tile before he’s pulling at the hem of your t-shirt. 

“Let’s take this off.” You nod, tugging it up over your head breathlessly, unaware of where it lands after Ari tugs it from your fingers. He drops to his knees, hooking a finger under the elastic band holding up your pajamas. You tense, remembering the last person who had been between your legs, but Ari grounds you, his lips brushing over the curve of your hip. 

“Don’t.” His mouth moves softly against your skin. “Stay here. With me, right now. Don’t go anywhere else.” Ari peels the layers of clothing back from your skin, his hands roaming hungrily over each newly revealed inch. You step out of them and then quickly scoot off your socks. Ari looks up at you from between your thighs, making hard, heavy eye contact as he places a hand beneath your knee. 

“Can I do this for you, Sweetheart? Can I make you feel good?” God, you want to let him. Everything’s out of you control—Andy, Dove, your whole life, but this? This is yours. This, you get to choose.

“Yes.” Even the act of consent feels unfamiliar. “I—I want to.” You don’t know how to describe the way you see the relief leave his body, his broad shoulders relaxing as he widens your stance, pushing your thighs apart till he can kneel between them properly. He squeezes the back of your thigh reassuringly before slowly lifting it to rest on his good shoulder. Ari holds your gaze as he leans forward to place a kiss on the chubby curve of your vulva through your cotton panties. 

His mouth is warm and soft—reverent as he mouths at your swelling lips through the fabric. Ari strokes your hip as he catches the fabric with his teeth, before pulling it aside to marvel at your bare pussy. You want to look away but you don’t, your mouth dropping open as he delivers a sloppy kiss against your slick folds. 

“O-oh,” the sound falls from your lips unbidden, and you feel his mouth curve against you. He pauses briefly to shrug out of his flannel, and dimly you are aware of the sound of his zipper before he’s back, his face thrust hard into the soaking place between your thighs. You mumble his name. 

“Ari, Ari, Ari—” 

He rolls the pearl of your clit against the roof of his mouth, circling your entrance with one finger. You press your head back against the tile, staring unseeingly at the ceiling. You do not remember threading your fingers through his hair, but as you tighten them, tugging, he moans, throaty and low. When you chance a look down, Ari is staring at you with lidded eyes. He flicks your clit sharply with the tip of his tongue, humming appreciatively as you jackknife. 

“Go ahead and cum, Mouse,” he murmurs the words against your slick, twitching skin. “It’s okay, Sweetheart, I know you need it.” One hand remains buried in Ari’s hair, tugging on it helplessly as the other scrabbles for purchase against the tile, looking for something—anything—to hold onto. You push against the hot water knob, and the pipes rattle as water rockets through them. You are tangentially aware of the spray of warm water from the shower head—but only barely. You whine helplessly, hips rolling against Ari’s face as you cum. 

He presses the tip of his finger into your cunt, groaning at the feel of you, wet and swollen and sucking at him. He gently lowers your leg, and your trembling knees nearly buckle. You watch as Ari wraps his fist around his cock, pumping it slowly as he stares at the sticky, messy spot at the apex of your thighs. It’s thick, veiny like his forearms. He sweeps his thumb across the tip,  spreading the dewy drop of precum gathered there. 

Ari stands, fishing his wallet out of his back pocket. From inside, he produces a wrinkled—but sealed—condom. He tears into the packet with his teeth before discarding it. He fumbles with one hand, nearly dropping it, but you help, gingerly pulling the condom from his fingers. Ari stands stock still as you roll it slowly down to the base before he grasps your chin, his mouth crashing against yours. You can taste yourself on his tongue. 

This time when he lifts you, he uses the wall to leverage your weight, sinking you down slow as you lock your ankles behind his waist. Ari’s head lolls, his lips parting in a silent “o” as he draws his hips back, and then fully sheathes himself inside. The air in your lungs escapes in a sharp, needy whine. 

“F-full.” You don’t even realize you’ve said it until Ari hums in agreement. 

“Feels good, doesn’t it Mouse?” He breathes. “Shit, you’re squeezing me so nice,” he breathes, drawing back until your cunt is sicking at the tip of him before driving all the way back inside. You manage a nod, your hips rolling greedily into his.

“I-I—fuck—again—” The words don’t want to leave your tongue in any sort of sensible manner, but Ari understands them, grinning hungrily as he picks up the pace. He skims your clit with his thumb, and you can feel the sparks skittering up your spine and you gasp as he does it again and again—

“Come on, Sweetheart, you’ve got one more in there for me, don’t you?” He mutters, angling his hips up into yours as you writhe against him. “Wanna feel it on my cock—mmm, fuck—” You do, leaning forward to bury your face against his chest as you wail, your cunt clamping down around him like a fist. Ari curls his massive body over yours as he empties into you, his hips pressing softly against yours. He holds you there, his cock jerking and throbbing inside of you as he mumbles soft ‘mm’’s and ‘yeah, fuck yeah’’s into your hair until he’s done. 

You stay like that, your body buzzing as the warm water streaming down over you. Eventually, when you can no longer feel the hammer of his heart against your cheek, he pulls out, and you press your lips together in embarrassed amusement at the crinkle of latex. He knots it off before tossing it into the trash bin. Your cheeks burn as Ari cleans between your legs, cupping your swollen cunt with an appreciative hum. He slides his fingers through the folds of your sticky sex, and your breath hitches. 

“I’m just cleaning you up, Mouse, I promise.” He’s true to his word, there’s   hungry, lustful intensity in his touches, only care. You str heady yourself against his shoulder, and your heart drops at the  sight of his bandages. The center is tinged with a pink circle, and as you stare at it, it darkens a little. 

“You’re bleeding.” Ari looks down at his shoulder and grimaces.

“Occupational hazard, Mouse. I’ll be fine.” He attempts to reassure you with a smile, but it doesn’t completely do away with the cold feeling in your belly.

“We’re going to need to change these, at least,” you say, fingering the edge of his wet bandage. “I think Zemo will be mad if we don’t.”

“He’s always mad.” Ari replies, and you laugh. “But yes. We’ll change them” 

It somehow feels more intimate to stand there in the shower with Ari, slowly washing off the events of the last day and a half. He shampoos your hair, rubbing it in gently at the roots with the tips of his fingers. When you’re finally done, he helps you towel off, before producing a generic grey sweatshirt and pants from one of the cupboards after a bit of rummaging. 

When the two of you return to the garage, dewy cheeked and differently clothed, Irene snorts. 

“Had a good time, did you?” 

—

Dove won’t stop crying. 

Andy isn’t a bad father, he knows he’s not, but for some reason, he can’t get her calmed down. Her little fists are clenched tight, beating the air above her head with a frustration Andy as her father, cannot seem to quell. He bounces his daughter tiredly as he paces around the nursery, mumbling soothing baby speak as he rubs circles on her back. 

She’s been wailing practically nonstop since Pronge had delivered her, his expression grim as he’d handed her over. 

I couldn’t get your wife.

Andy had wanted to rage, then, and he almost had, itching to slam the whiskey glass in his hand into Robert’s face for the trouble—but Dove’s fussing had provided a sufficient reminder that it might not be appropriate to do so. She cries herself to sleep, hiccoughing in his arms until her breathing evens. Andy carefully lays her down in the crib, stroking his hand over the curve of her cheek. He closes the door to the nursery, and to his disgust, Robert Pronge stands in the hallway, the decanter of whiskey from his office held in his hand. He takes a swig from it. 

“Who else was with her?” 

Pronge grimaces. “Irene. And her new assistant. Fucker’s as big as a goddamn house. Name’s Ari Levinson, he owns some shithole bar.” Andy’s eyes narrow.

“Get out.” He shoulders past the killer in his hallway, not bothering to take back the bottle.

“And do what, exactly?” He sneers. 

“Finish your goddamn job, and find my wife.” Andy waits to hear the sound of the front door before returning to his office. He’d had you—and you’d slipped right through his fingers again. You wouldn’t want to be apart from Dove, at least, that much he could be sure of. You’re a good mother, regardless of the doubts he knows he’ll have to plant in your beautiful head to get you to stay. 

Ari Levinson. 

The name is unfamiliar, and a search through both Massachusetts and New York state databases return no results. He does, however, get pings on basic search engines.

Ari Levinson. Dishonorable discharge, tried for murder, dismissed as self defense.

Now that is interesting.

It’s after midnight when he finally decides to turn in for the night, and as he closes his office door, he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. He reaches for it, frowning at the unfamiliar number—but then his eyes widen at the caller I.D. 

Albany.

“Hello?” At first, there’s only grainy silence on the other end, until finally, you speak. 

“I’m ready to talk, Andy.” 

He smiles. “Oh, Honey. I knew you would be.” 

to be continued…

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[292pantone]

Okay! Time for some Glass Onion analysis bc I'm already obsessed with this movie.

GLASS ONION SPOILERS AHEAD READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

I've seen people saying that it was unnecessary for the movie Glass Onion to be set in May 2020 during the height of the pandemic, and that it took away from the movie, but I disagree. The specific setting is relevant because of all the movie's subtext about the Black Lives Matter movement and its resurgence in May 2020. Hear me out- there are several parallels between Andi's death/Helen's avenging her death by wrecking the mansion, and the riots in 2020 following the unjust deaths of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and many others.

To begin with, there's the power dynamic between Andi and Miles. A mediocre, unexceptional white man stole the contributions of a brilliant black woman and got away with it because his influential friends closed ranks around him in a system designed to benefit him. He got the benefit of the doubt and weaponized the legal system to financially ruin her. Even though she was telling the truth, no one believed her, and Miles fully expected this pattern to continue once her sister Helen took up the cause.

Miles burns the incriminating evidence of his lies and flat-out tells Helen that no one will ever believe her with only circumstantial evidence. Even Benoit Blanc acknowledges that his skill as a detective can only go so far without the police and courts on his side.

In the case of police brutality, cops similarly weaponize the legal system and avoid accountability for their murders by closing ranks through police unions that invoke "qualified immunity" (aka shielding the cops from legal liability). The privilege of white men, compounded by their wealth and connections, makes it difficult for them to face actual consequences for the harm they do.

We see the concept of avoiding consequences again with Miles' crew of "disruptors", all of whom rely on his money to bail them out of trouble. Birdie was implied to have done blackface, made tone-deaf comments comparing herself to Harriet Tubman, completely ignored all COVID restrictions, and tweeted ethnic slurs to the point where her assistant had to take away her phone, but her line of loungewear still takes off thanks to Miles' financial backing. In response to the latest scandal, personal assistant Peg says "We will do what we always do! Deny, half-apologize, then go silent awhile." Despite her litany of offenses and half-assed attempts at accountability, no consequences stick to the privileged Birdie either.

However, Helen refuses to accept this unfair state of things. In a situation where she appears powerless, with her sister gone and the valuable napkin burned, Helen essentially goes "fuck that" and makes Miles pay for what he did anyway. If the law won't take her side, she has to take it into her own hands. This is where the parallels to the 2020 riots come in.

We see her smashing the symbols of Miles' wealth, starting with his glass sculptures, and at first the other characters don't mind. They cheer her on from the couches, even though they all just refused to testify for her in court. This parallels the performative activism seen in many celebrities, who would rather watch from the sidelines and say vaguely supportive things rather than do any meaningful action to change the system. The other guests are happy to break the glass sculptures alongside her, saying how cathartic it feels, but they get antsy when she moves on to breaking more valuable things instead of giving up after a short while like they did. The camera shots of Helen smashing things and lighting a fire linger uncomfortably long as it starts to sink in that this isn't just a momentary temper tantrum. The so-called "disruptors" wince and gasp and exclaim how a piano belonged to Liberace and so on, completely ignoring how THE DESTRUCTION IS THE POINT, because if Helen only broke safe, acceptable targets, then it wouldn't actually mean anything. Similarly, when people rioted in 2020, there was a huge amount of pearl-clutching by people saying rioting is going too far, and can't we all just be nonviolent and have unity and forgive each other? In both cases, there's a veneer of support from people who just want the victims of injustice to "get their anger out of their systems" and move on without any serious changes being made.

I find it very fitting that Helen burns the Mona Lisa with Miles' own unregulated hydrogen fuel cell, using the override switch that he carelessly installed. She exploits the natural consequences of his self-centeredness so they all catch up to him at once. In the end, Helen's acts of protest do disrupt things and lead to change, even as people tell her she is going too far. Once Helen does the actual work of tanking Miles' reputation for good, only then do the "disruptors" jump ship and promise to back her up in court. They're willing to take the side of justice only when things have shifted to the point where it's the better act of self-preservation. If there was any chance of still hanging onto Miles' golden titty and making his reputation their hill to die on, they would've done it.

Blanc, the protagonist of the movie, gives Helen tacit permission to burn everything down by handing her the chunk of hydrogen fuel. He stands by her the whole movie and takes her seriously, demonstrating a path to better (non-performative) allyship.

Glass Onion shows that lasting change has to be demanded, not wheedled, and that sometimes things have to reach an undeniable crisis point to do so. In other words: protest is necessary.

#discussion #glass onion #knives out #glass onion analysis #black lives matter #knives out analysis #benoit blanc #miles bron

[grassbreads]

Fei Du, trembling and coughing uncontrollably as he struggles to recall a repressed childhood memory of his father forcing him to participate in his mother's abuse on threat of suffocation:

"What are you talking about, shixiong? I don't have any trauma."

#this man is so much #''he never hurt me physically so I don't have any trauma'' #like first of all. lwz is right #there is no way on earth FEI DU of all people doesn't know what emotional abuse is #he just can't conceive of the concept in relation to himself #and furthermore. #FEI DU. DID YOU FORGET THAT ''DO THIS THING OR YOU WILL SUFFOCATE'' COUNTS AS A THREAT OF PHYSICAL VIOLENCE??? #kid there was a metal ring around your neck #fei du. come on man #I can't be mad at him because I know he's just in denial. but. god #augh #mo du #silent reading #fei du #andie reads silently #mo du spoilers #child abuse #abuse tw

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

Can we have Andrew and Reader have a life after the events of the game (In the Bulletless Decay route)?

Reader would be an exchange student who would have gone to stay with the Graves family, but in the end she ended up being another 'victim' of the game's circumstances.

She would be a type of person who was indifferent to almost everything, cold-blooded, with somewhat sociopathic tendencies but with a kind heart.

Okay, let's do this, after Ashley's murder, Andrew and Reader finally got fake teeth and moved somewhere far away, but with all the recent traumas and along with the fear of being abandoned.

Andrew started to have possessive tendencies, a little clingy, toxic, manipulative towards our 'poor thing' Reader and that would result in them having children in the future, to keep her trapped in the coffin with him.

I assume you mean “Fake ID” but sure!

TW: Implied Trapped Pregnancy

Decay!Andrew x Reader

Ashley wasn’t the only person to die that night

With her went Andy and LeyLey

And the Andrew you had fallen in love with

It felt like looking at the zombie of a loved one with him. Glimpses would be there, you’d see it when he smiles- when he reads poetry- when he clings to you as he’s haunted by his actions

But other than that….it’s like he’s a husk of his former self

Given all that’s happened with you two, it was only smart to move far, FAR out into the country

Aside from the visits into town to get groceries, you both rarely interacted with anyone

It was for the best in your opinion

Neither of you were functioning enough for society after what you’d been through

Indifferent is how you always felt after you two killed Ashley

If Andrew was a zombie, you were a ghost; mindlessly wandering the mortal realm without a semblance of a soul or consciousness

Though you were still there

You disliked the one day of the month you came here. Though the only inhabitants of this town were rednecked bumpkins whose only concern with you and your husband was that you attend church, they still made you uneasy. You were just waiting for the rug pull, the one person in a crowd to call you both out for everything.

In your mindless state of inspecting an apple, debating if you should grab a bundle, you felt a tug at your side. You perked up, turning to look at who needed your attention, only for your eyes to go down at the child standing beside you.

A little girl. Eyes wide and a bit puffy from the tears that had formed in the corners. As you silently stared at her, she looked like she was about to cry again.

“I-I’m sorry Miss…” she voice was squeaky and pathetic, she ran her hand over her nose as she sniffled, “I thought you were my mama..”

You felt a pang in your heart, which was a rare occurrence for you. Against your better judgment, you set the apple down and took the little girl’s hand.

“I’ll help you find her…”

The kind hearted exchange student that arrived at the Graves Family all those years ago wasn’t fully dead…she still lingered

And that scared Andrew

He was so scared for you, so worried something from you two’s past will come back to hurt you

You couldn’t leave him, no. You just couldn’t.

He’ll protect you

He’ll make you stay with him

Andrew held on to you tight as you slept soundly, your back pressed against close his chest. He kept track of your breathing, it grounded him when he was alone with his thoughts like this. You were his anchor, the only think keeping him from floating away.

Which is why he had to do this.

Andrew drove people away, if not they were taken from him. He drove Julia away, Ashley took away Nina, and then you both decided Ashley needed to be taken away.

Though the dangers were gone, there was the chance of a vengeful demon creeping out of hiding for getting rid of his ‘favorite tar souled mortal’. The chance people would find out and separate you both. The chance you would leave him eventually.

He couldn’t have that, he couldn’t bear it.

He lowered his head to your bare shoulder, planting a gentle kiss to it. His hands ran over your stomach.

“I love you Y/N…”

#the coffin of andy and leyley #andrew graves #andrew graves x reader #x reader

[peachesofteal]

Who wants to read the first like 1.4k of the winter ghoap fic even though it has absolutely no ghoap in it?

Winter in the mountains can be cruel. 

This is something you’ve always known, even as a child. You were raised with it. Chose to return to it after school, decided to make a go of it, of a life here, as an adult. You knew what you were getting yourself into, long cold winters that felt both bleak and promising, unblemished blankets of snow possessing the ability to be stunning, while also lethal. Winters were dangerous, silent killers that left corpses in their wake and no amount of lupine or paintbrushes, glacier fed lakes or springtime moose calves could make up for the hell that winter wrought. Winter brings most living things to the knife’s edge of survival, forcing most to bow beneath the weight of its fury, backs breaking with the burden of just existing in a below freezing environment. 

Although, there are some who do more than survive the cold, violent stretch of winter. There are predators who thrive. 

“You closin’?” Your coworker, the new one, asks from where she’s settled across the dark wood bar, two amber Budweiser bottles empty in front her idle hands, eyes wandering to guys posted up by the loneliest pool table in fifty square miles. 

“I am.” She casts the one window in the entire place a surreptitious glance, fingers peeling away at a label. It’s snowing, has been for hours, flakes fat and wet, fluffy enough that the density of the snow on the ground is light, but dangerous, as it hides the real risk underneath; packed snow sitting with a slick sheen of ice on top. 

“You still trying to make it over Fall River pass tonight?” You nod. 

“Yeah. Supposed to see my brother and his new baby this weekend.” 

“Fall River? Is that even open right now?” Andy, a regular who lives a few streets over from you, chimes in, twisting an empty rocks glass in his fist. You pull the bottle of Jameson from the rail and tip it vertical, honey brown liquid sloshing like a wave until his glass is halfway full, and he gives you a flirty kind of smile, the same one he’s been giving you for a year now. Yeeesh.

“It is. I could go around, but it just takes too long. And it’s Friday. I’m not trying to be stuck on the highway with ski traffic and the tourists in their rental cars.” You complain, and they both commiserate your opinion. Weekend traffic is brutal, especially in the winter. Driving in hazardous conditions is considered to be a talent more than an innate ability here, and people often overestimate their aptitude for it, causing crashes and delays that get the highway shut down for hours, or even days, at times. You shrug. “I’ve had my snow tires on for weeks. Might as well get some use out of them.” Andy snorts. 

“Like you haven’t been gettin’ good use out of them? First real snow was before Halloween this year.” You nod. He’s not wrong. You did get dumped on two weeks before the end of October, twenty-three inches piling up within two days, before half the area was even ready for it. You throw him a polite smile, one that you hope reads like ‘okay thanks for the concern, we’re done now’ and he sighs. “Well, drive safe.” 

Fall River pass, it turns out, is not open. It’s closed by the time you split off from the interstate and start the windy, switch-backed trek in your jeep, flashing orange and yellow lights dotting the top of a barricade just barely visible through the speckled snow flying by in your headlights. 

Fuck. You could have sworn the DOT website said it was open. You take a deep breath, quelling the anxiety that roils your stomach. Okay. Not the end of the world. There’s another road. A less maintained road, but… you’ll be fine. You’ve driven in worse. 

The other road, a sharp, narrow, desolate path that cuts through a large swath of unmanaged forest just outside the national park, is easy at first. You’ve been driving the same jeep for years, a 2007 two door Wrangler, and you know how it handles like the back of your hand. With snow tires, it could pretty much cut through anything, even unplowed, fire watch roads like this one. 

Which is why, after the first few miles, your nerves fully settle, and you allow yourself to relax a little bit behind the wheel, easing the jeep across the dips and slicks in the road as you cautiously build speed, snow falling fast through night, growing thicker the higher you travel into wilderness territory, and the farther you left modern civilization behind. 

An hour creeps by, and then two. Long enough that you’ve now realized you’re the only one using this road, fresh snow blanketing the woods around you, topography and vegetation starting to change as you encroach on what you assume must be eleven thousand feet. You’ve seen this road on google maps once, or twice maybe, having noted it for future travel just in case of a situation like this. It travels perpendicular to Fall River, and eventually meets another, one that must be similar, on the other side of the range. The secondary road is one that takes you along the ridge, and then down, you’re pretty sure, although you can’t be one hundred percent certain, because you lost cell reception before you even turned off from Fall River.

Still, won’t hurt to check and see if you have this area downloaded. 

You pull your phone from the center console, thumbing at the screen, allowing your eyes to linger too long without looking back up through the windshield. No one else is out here. It’s not like you need to worry about oncoming traffic. The little SOS insignia blinks at the top corner, and you tap on the map icon, hoping it will bring up your geo location so you can glance at the satellite map of the area. 

You’re so fixated watching the little circle of death try to load, that by the time you look up and see the tree laying across the road, it’s far too late. You do the first thing you were always taught not to do in winter conditions, and slam on the brake, slamming the pedal to floor, heart rate sky rocketing as you panic and lose total control of the jeep. You spin, shoulders and chest jamming against the seatbelt, headlights flashing off into the woods, illuminating an endlessly dark web of trees, bark and branch scratching across the paint as you careen off the road, tipping too precariously onto two wheels and then rolling. 

Time, your life, stands completely still for a moment. You see every individual fiber of the pine needles, every uniquely designed snowflake, every single droplet of blood that floats away from your face and through midair as you crash through the forest, your grasp on consciousness slipping farther and farther away as you’re jostled around, the jeep finally coming to a stop on its side, your head cracked against the driver’s window, stars and lights spawning out across your vision, headlights finally blinking out completely, leaving you in the dark. Your head spins like you’re still rolling, and the only sound in the dead silent snow is your harsh breathing, frantic terror bubbling up through your throat as pain surges through your body. 

It's freezing, but you feel surprisingly warm. 

You’re going to die out here. No one knows you took this road, you don’t have service, by the time they find you, it’ll be too late. You’ll be a bled out, frozen corpse, long gone and- 

You lose your train of thought quickly. Everything starts to fracture, fissures forming in your consciousness, part of you already losing the battle to the inevitable, black pulling over your eyes like a knit hat, lungs heaving just a little harder with each breath. 

Sleep. You could just close your eyes. Close your eyes, and sleep. 

Light sweeps across the ground, flashing across your face. You think, if you were truly with it, in your right mind, you’d think it was too bright. You’d say it was blinding. 

But you can’t formulate anything of the sort, mind too busy slipping away, falling into an inky black pool, just barely on the verge when you feel a gloved hand on your skin, the lilt of an accent on the wind. 

Sleep. 

#peaches writes

[whateverisbeautiful]

I think it’s fair to say that TWOL has given us license to claim Rick and Michonne been soulmates since the very beginning (which is different than when they may have consciously realized they were in love), simply because this series has been so intensely romantic that it almost seems to be encouraging us to read them this way. Which makes all your romantic interpretations of their scenes as canon lol it’s amazing cause I remember some posts where you were like ‘maybe I’m reading too much into this’ but Andy and Danai said nope! You’re absolutely correct! Knowing how much pain and silent suffering they carried alone before they met each other (and still endured), it never fails to move me that they found intrinsic understanding and the kind of devotional love they had probably only dreamt about, in each other.

‘They found intrinsic understanding and devotional love they had probably only dreamt about, in each other’ 👏🏽👏🏽😭

First, just had to highlight that quote because what you wrote was beautiful and spot on. ��� I agree, I love that TOWL confirmed Rick and Michonne’s soulmate status at every turn. Andy and Danai made sure it was clear that so much of what fuels their characters is Richonne’s love and not only was it great to watch, it’s true to the characters and how they operated in twd too.

And your words really made me smile because I remember a couple of those past posts where I wondered if I was drawing more from certain scenes than was there. (Like when Rick asks if Michonne needs help in season 4 and she says do your thing - now I'm confident he was out there that morning deliberately to get time with her) I don’t doubt those richonne details anymore because their journey has been an epic love story from day one, so each scene really is a special thread in the fabric of their romance.

One of the many gifts TOWL gave us is how now we get to watch every scene from the mothership with fresh eyes and a heightened awareness that these two soulmates have always been drawn to each other on a cosmic level. 🙌🏽

#richonne #twd towl #the ones who live #richonne family

[navybrat817]

Down to Business

Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Andy Barber x Female Reader Summary: You meet Andy for lunch and discuss a new potential job. Word Count: Almost 3.1k Warnings: Reader is broke (is that a warning?), sugar daddy offer, slightly d/irty thoughts, slight insecurities, slight power imbalance if you squint, inner monologue, Andy Barber (he's a warning, okay?) Graphic talent and thanks: Banner - @sgt-seabass, Divider - @firefly-graphics , Header - yours truly A/N: More of my Terms and Conditions AU! Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby and @flordeamatista (thanks!), but any and all mistakes are my own. ❤️ Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

You knew you were out of your element the moment you stood in front of the restaurant. The pillars and steps were reminiscent of a courthouse, hence the name, but more lavish in design with the ornate marble. It seemed to tower over you, silently judging you for daring to set foot there. You didn't belong there, even if Andy had asked you to join him.

No. I'm not going to let him or myself down by chickening out.

Straightening the skirt of your dress and checking your folder once more to make sure you had your resume, you held your head high as you went inside. You wouldn't pretend to belong in a place this nice, but you refused to belittle yourself. You were smart, determined, and capable, which was how you got your old job. Whatever job Andy had to offer you, you'd make sure he knew you could handle it.

"Hello," you greeted the hostess. "I'm here to meet Andy Barber."

"Yes, he's expecting you," she smiled, giving you a quick once over. The dark blue dress you wore was, you hoped, nice and professional enough for the place and Andy. "Follow me, please."

The emptiness of the restaurant was eerily quiet and made you feel almost uncomfortable before you spotted Andy seated in the middle of the main room. Power clung to him as he rose to his feet, perfectly at ease as he buttoned his suit jacket. You would have thought you were a lamb headed for the slaughter if not for the gentle smile on his face. Your breath hitched before you smiled back and you were thankful you didn't trip over your feet.

"It's good to see you," he said, moving around to pull out your seat. "Thank you for joining me."

You were used to the barrier of the diner counter between the two of you and it hit you just how large and imposing he was up close. The man could break you if he wanted with his size, but it was the gentle smile on his face and the intensity of his blue eyes that struck you as he helped you into the seat. The gesture told you he was a gentleman, but his aura said something lurked beneath the surface.

"Thank you for asking me," you said, his musky cologne lingering as he went back to his chair. "I hope you weren't waiting long."

After Andy invited you to lunch, you downed some coffee and immediately got ready. You wanted to give yourself plenty of time so you wouldn't be late. It would've given a bad impression if you couldn't even be on time for lunch.

"Not at all," he said, the glittering chandelier above him giving him an otherworldly glow. "You look lovely."

Your heart raced as you caught him gazing at you. A man as attractive as Andy Barber calling you lovely felt like a dream. The crackling tension had to be your imagination. Wishful thinking.

"Thank you," you said, wondering if you should tell him how handsome he looked.

No. Don't flirt with your potential boss. Lusting after him won't do me any good.

You opted instead to look over the menu. You didn't see any prices and wondered how much everything cost. Or maybe people didn't care about what they spent at a place this nice. Since you had no clue what the cheapest selection would be, you decided to go with the entree that sounded the most appetizing.

"They have a nice wine selection if you're interested," Andy offered.

You glanced up and locked eyes with him. It was hard to get a read on him, but he likely had a good poker face from practicing law and his business ventures. You wondered how others reacted when he focused his attention on them. You refused to look away.

"I think I'll stick with water," you smiled. Not that there was anything wrong with having a drink in the middle of the day, but you were there to discuss business. He could have offered it as a test and you didn't want to fail. "I appreciate the offer though."

Andy hummed and leaned back in his seat. He didn't look upset, which was a good sign. "Nervous?"

I'm just sitting in one of the nicest places in the city with the most gorgeous man I ever laid eyes on who could change my future. No nerves at all.

"What makes you say that?" you asked.

"Your posture," he answered as he gestured to you. "Tension in your shoulders."

"Oh," you said, only a little surprised that he noticed. "Is it wrong to say that I am?"

"No, because I told you I appreciate honesty," he reminded you. "May I ask why you're nervous? What happened to being 'cautiously optimistic'?"

He listened to me.

"Because," you began, setting your hands in your lap so he wouldn't see you twist your fingers together. "I want to make a good impression and I don't want you to regret asking me to this lunch, especially since you went through the trouble of having them open the place."

I want my luck to turn around.

"If you hadn't made a good impression on me to begin with, I wouldn't have asked you to lunch," he spoke, reaching for your folder and opening it as your shoulders relaxed a bit. "Time is precious and I wouldn't waste mine or yours."

"That makes sense," you said as his eyes skimmed the paper. "I kept my objective simple since I wasn't sure what the position was, but I could update it if you need."

"No need," he said, lifting his gaze once he finished looking it over. "You have a wonderful resume, which I knew you would, and you're a hard worker. You have nothing to worry about. Trust me."

You felt your insides warm up from the praise that poured in. While Andy hadn't seen you in an office setting, he had seen you in action at the diner. He knew you had a can-do attitude and could remain calm under pressure. You were friendly even when people were rude. You just needed your luck to turn around so you could stay on top of your bills.

"Thank you," you whispered, the knot in your stomach unraveling. "I appreciate hearing that."

"It's the truth," he assured you before the waiter came over. "But why don't we order before we discuss anything further? Pick whatever you want."

"Okay," you smiled, mentally telling your stomach not to growl as the waiter poured you each a glass of water and went over the specials.

You took the opportunity to glance at Andy when he ordered, trying not to get lost in how confident he sounded while simply picking out something to eat. While he wasn't stern with the waiter, you noticed his voice wasn't as soft as how he spoke to you. Maybe it was a coincidence.

Maybe it was also a coincidence that he stared down the waiter when it was your turn to order. An unreadable expression again, but something colder. At least he wasn't rude to him.

"Did you have any questions for me?" you asked once the waiter left.

"Down to business, aren't you?" Andy smiled. "That depends on how the next part of this conversation will go. Have you heard of Huffman Enterprises?"

You nodded. Scott Huffman was another former lawyer and an associate of Andy's. The name came up when you did your research.

"He's expanding thanks to a merger and needs new employees," he explained, tapping the folder with his finger. "I know for a fact he has openings for positions similar to your previous job on what's likely a higher pay scale. All I have to do is make a call and he'll hire you on the spot."

You placed your hands on the table as you leaned forward slightly, trying not to appear too eager. You enjoyed your last job before they had to let you go. The opportunity sounded too good to be true though. And you weren't sure why, but it disappointed you that it was a friend of Andy's that would potentially be your boss and not Andy himself.

Maybe it was a blessing in disguise since I'd probably be too busy fantasizing about the man in front of me.

"That sounds wonderful, but why do I feel like there's a 'but' in there?"

"There's that cautiously optimistic side you talked about," he smiled sadly, the knot in your stomach starting to form again. "Because the job isn't available immediately. It will be a few months before you can start. I'm sorry it isn't sooner."

There it is.

Your heart sank, but you didn't hang your head. Maybe that was why Andy didn't tell you the exact details of the job. Had he said immediately that you couldn't start right away, maybe you wouldn't have taken him up on his offer to meet. It could still work if you had to tough it out for a few months. Maybe you could get a second job in the meantime to help cover your expenses.

Only maybe.

You jolted when his hand covered yours, snapping you out of your thoughts. "I can see the wheels turning in your head, honey. Be honest with me. Can you survive the next few months on what you're making now?"

Tears threatened to surface when you didn't answer. You would have to find a way, even if it ruined your credit if you couldn't stay on top of your bills. Or even if you lost your small apartment. You didn't want to be another crushed dreamer in the city.

"I didn't think so," he said, his voice laced with sympathy. "What if I offered to help you?"

"Help me how? By giving me a loan?"

No one helped for free and no way would you be able to pay him back within a reasonable timeframe. The interest alone would drain your bank account. It would be another circle of issues. You didn't want that with Andy or anyone else. You also didn't want to be a charity case.

He brushed his thumb over your hand in a featherlight motion before he pulled away. "Not a loan, but what if I got you caught up on your bills and covered your rent until you could start that job?"

"And what would I have to do for you, Mr. Barber?" you carefully asked.

"I told you to call me Andy," he said, his eyes not leaving yours as he sipped his drink.

Heat rolled down your chest as he licked the liquid from his lip. "What would I have to do for you, Andy?"

"Be there for me," he stated as a matter of fact, running his fingers along his beard. They were so long and thick. "I have some functions to attend and some traveling to do over the next few months. I need someone by my side for all of them and I want that person to be you."

"An assistant?"

He shook his head. "I have an assistant. I'd like you to be my companion."

It wasn't humiliation that washed over you as he waited for you to speak. A wave of shock, perhaps, as you processed his words. Maybe you hadn't heard him correctly.

You waited for the laughter. The punchline. It wasn't a job he was offering you.

It was something else entirely.

"You want me to be an escort?" you asked just above a whisper.

"If ‘escort’ is what you want to call it, but I prefer companion," he said, the corner of his lip lifting. "Escorts sometimes sleep with their clients and I didn't say you have to sleep with me."

You were thankful you didn't have a drink in your mouth. You likely would've spit it out or choked. Maybe he didn't say it, but did he want it? Would he ask that of you?

Would he eventually expect that of me?

"First thing, if you agree, you'll have to quit the diner so you'll be available. Which means you can't take another job in the meantime. I'll have clothes and jewelry bought for you and also give you petty cash in a sense for anything else you need. I'll cover your bills and expenses, so you won't need to worry about that," he explained when you stayed quiet.

"All that just for a few functions?" you asked skeptically. It seemed to be a bit much.

"Some of the traveling would be for days at a time. I'm hoping you and I can get to know each other a bit before those take place so you feel comfortable," he said. Hearing that made sense since the two of you didn't know each other very well. "And I won't ask you to move in with me since that's both fast and takes away your independence, but I would feel more comfortable knowing you're not alone in your current apartment. I have a place in my building you could use in the meantime."

You exhaled once he finished. The man seemed to thrive on control and he would essentially take over your life if you agreed. No job meant no income unless he gave it to you. Even living in a nicer place, it was his building.

"I don't understand. Why me?" you asked, searching for something on his face that could give you an answer.

It didn't make sense to you. He could hire someone if he needed dates to functions. He could find any woman on the sidewalk if he wanted to.

Why was he asking you?

You didn't jump this time when he put his hand back on yours. "Because you're one of the only honest and kind people I've met in a long time and you shouldn't have to struggle. I want to help you, even if it's just for a short time," he said, your heart skipping a beat when he smiled a little. "And between us, I'm a bit lonely and I like talking to you."

The vulnerability in his gaze was an emotion he was allowing you to see. It was enough to shake your resolve because you understood how loneliness could eat at a person. And while you didn't find yourself interesting to talk to, he deserved to have someone in his life who didn't try to use him for their gain. He probably had more than his fair share of that.

I'm not using him if he's offering, right? I wouldn't take more than necessary. Just enough until things were right again. Still doesn't seem like a fair trade.

"Say I agree to this. When the job comes up, that's the end of our arrangement?"

"If that's what you'd like," he answered evenly. "You'd be working, so I wouldn't exactly be able to whisk you away on a whim. And you'd start with a clean slate so to speak since everything would be paid for until you receive your first paycheck."

That was something to consider. "And if I say no?"

"Then I pay for your lunch and your cab and contact you when the job opens up down the road," he offered with a casual shrug. "If you still want it, it's yours. If not, no harm done."

That surprised you. Andy would have nothing to gain by setting you up for a job if you didn't agree to spend time with him. And you didn't get the sense that he would sabotage your chances if you turned him down. It was as if he wanted you to succeed.

Who are you, Andy Barber?

"I think I know why you asked me to meet you here."

"And why is that?" he asked.

"You didn't want to speak over the phone because I could have hung up or blocked your number if your offer upset me, so you chose this place. Almost a middle ground, but a place where you still hold the cards because you're showing me what I can have if I agree to this," you said, waving your hand toward one of the empty tables. "You also chose to speak to me alone in a semi-public place. The public aspect so I wouldn't be uncomfortable, but alone as a way to keep my dignity intact in case I insulted you or worse. It's smart."

And a power move while still considering my feelings.

He gave you a single nod, seemingly impressed. "That's a good analysis and I'd have to agree with you. I'd like to add it was also to keep my dignity intact in case you threw your drink in my face or slapped me."

"I imagine the staff here would be discreet on your part," you smiled. "And lunch isn't over yet. There's still time in case I decide to make a scene."

His warm chuckle sent heat down your spine. "I'll be on my best behavior to ensure you don't, though I wouldn't mind."

"I'll need to think about it," you told him, smiling more despite yourself. It was a lot to consider. "And we'll need to discuss specifics."

"You're talking to a former lawyer. I'd insult myself if I didn't have some kind of contract drawn up for the two of us."

"A Sugar Daddy contract?" you teased before you could stop yourself.

God, why did I say that?

The waiter chose to return at that moment, the enticing aroma of the food filling the air. Andy didn't take his darkened eyes off you as he dragged his teeth along his bottom lip. You barely managed to say "thanks" when the plates were put on the table, too entranced with the man across the table. Virtually a stranger, but determined to help you and get a little something from you in return.

"Call me 'daddy', honey, and I can't promise I'll be on my best behavior, but if it will convince you to be mine? Say it all you want," he said in a low voice, deep enough to make you rub your thighs together as he smirked. "So. Exactly how much time will you need to think it over?"

You sat in thought for a moment as you tried to weigh out his offer. "I'll let you know how much time I need after we're finished with our lunch," you finally answered with a small smile.

And you had a feeling you'd say "yes" a lot sooner than you thought.

So, yes. The answer HAS to be yes. Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Andy Barber Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

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