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sag-dab-sar · 3 years

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My “God-phone”

I cannot stress enough how much I hate this term because of the connotation of a “phone” and the culture that has grown around it in the neo-pagan, witch, and revival polytheist, communities. I see individuals stressing over it and genuinely upset. I constantly see posts from people asking how to get one or what it means.

And the worst of all, I see people feeling unworthy; unworthy to worship or unworthy of the Gods simply because they don’t have a “godphone”— it breaks my heart.

You don’t need a godphone 💬

I’m writing this post to explain what my “”god phone”” seems to be. Because I am doing that I feel the need to extra emphasize that a godphone is not, in anyway, a requirement to worship the Gods.

How many practicing Hindus wait to receive a sign from a god before going to a temple? Does someone practicing Shinto have to wait for a "calling" before visiting a shrine? Neither of those would make sense. Going to shrine, praying, or temple is just a part of life, part of family, part of traditions, part of important life milestones.

It was the same in the past with the deities neo-pagans and recon/revive polytheists approach today — Athena, Enki, Ra, Anat, Bridgid, Thor, Perun, etc. These Gods were ingrained in societies and their people, ordinary average day folk just like us, required no Godphone. There is no reason to assume this precedent has changed.

My Internal Language💬

I’m making this post because I have experiences that people might put under the label “Godphone”. I’ve tried to explain them and seem to fail so I wrote this out. I don’t like to call it a godphone because its not a phone, no voices, no chit chat back and forth.

I call it an internal language, I have some experiences but not with every god and not all the time. These are the ways I can think of:

Sudden emotions I think are a response to something specific. Example: once, when I was starting my practice again after a break, I was just thinking to myself and thought “Maybe I won’t worship Hera,” a feeling of intense dread crashed on me. I took that to mean I had better continue worshiping her.

A feeling of longing for them, as if they are family members I’ve been missing. This is what I refer to when I say “X god called me to worship them.” Example: This is how I began worshiping Hygeia. I had already given her small honor along with her sister’s on her father Asklepios’ idol on a string of beads. But there was this deep sense of longing and missing her, until I began to worship her in her own right.

Strong desires to do something specific, give a specific offering, or have a specific object. Example: When I discovered Zeus was a household God all I wanted to do was research more and more, when before I had no desire to do so. It never crossed my mind. However, I also just like learning, maybe its a calling maybe its not. Another example: A very strong desire to have a representation on Ares of my career goal. …and then spending multiple hours looking for an idea and talking to others about it. Not feeling content at all until I had a concrete idea that would fulfill the desire.

Sudden sensations. Example: When I was considering dropping my worship of Sumerian deities I saw a piece of artwork and it reminded me of Ereškigal, a massive chill went down my spine (sensation of touch). … I took it as a sign to continue. Another example: one day when I was standing at my altar I considering which incense scent I should get, I thought “cinnamon, frankincense, maybe vanilla,” when I thought about the last one it was like Hygeia’s Idol glowed for a few moments (sense of sight). Didn’t connect any dots until later but she now has a vanilla scented candle.

Hitting me over the head with stuff that reminds me of them. Example: Having a day were I got reminded of Hygeia constantly and later that night connecting it to the fact that I had not put her Idol on the altar I had just made.

Thoughts or feelings I think are not necessarily my own. This is probably the common one. Example: When I consecrate an Idol I want to have a feeling of peace; not sure if thats a godphone though I don't think so. Another example: Feeling extremely uneasy when using the name Hera Antheia when her idol did not have flowers adorning it. Another example: The feeling of whether or not taking a photo of an altar or sharing an experience is wrong or right, its a sense of permission

Combinations of these experiences. This is probably what might equate to “god phone” the most. The fact that its multilayered makes it much more complex. Example: Athena’s Idol. I had an experience of her being extremely unhappy with her idol, wanting it in a different condition, and wanting specific things done. This all comes from a combination of emotions, sensations, thoughts, and desires. Another Example: The strong desire to have an object on Ares and the feeling of it being completely wrong to consecrate this statue as an idol without it.

I have some Gods that standout because I have had multiple internal language encounters with them that might be semi frequent (namely Hygeia and Athena)

Some gods I’ve had a few experiences, most I’ve had none, and others I’ve had only one maybe two. My internal language is irregular and definitely a one way style connection. There is no back and forth like a conversation. I have had “chat posts” in the past which depict a conversation between me and a God but its a translation of feelings and emotions and contemplations not legitimate words I’ve head …. or a joke not something that actually happened.

When I say Athena likes coffee, Hera Antheia demanded flowers, this thing (usually a special candle) belongs to this god, its usually because of an experience like the ones in the list above.

Idols 💬

I don’t consider feeling the presence of a God to be a “godphone”. It just is, no message attached thus not communication. Mostly because to me Idols are animated and thus contain the Gods presence.

I would never call an animated Idol a statue or object, only “Ereškigal’s Idol” or “Ereškigal.” That’s apart of my specific religious tradition mainly from Sumerian and I apply it into my Hellenic practice as well. It rests entirely on my faith; faith that the presence is there or faith that what I’m feeling is their presence.

Many of the bullet pointed experiences, such as sensations, have to do with the Idols; which makes sense because of their prominence in my practice and a direct connection to the Gods. But the presence in and of itself I do not consider to be “”godphone.””

Ending thought 💭

While I’ve had these experiences and I feel blessed when they happen, I don’t need them to maintain my religion. I would still tend to their idols and the altar, give offerings, praise them, pray, and ask for help. Plenty of Gods I’ve never had any experiences and yet I still worship them. Love for the Gods is more important than stressing over the ability to talk to them.

Original Post May 10th, 2019 — Slightly revised.

#polytheism #paganism #godphone #internal-language #yes i mention shinto #this is one of the rare occasions

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imjustwritingg · 3 years

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braced myself for the goodbye

Hi friends! This is an 8x11 speculation fic as requested. All the talk of that amazing promo and the concerns of a possible Upstead breakup took me down a seriously deep rabbit hole of feelings and angsty goodness that became this one shot. Title is lyrics from the song “Mine” by Taylor Swift. Enjoy lovelies!

TW // mentions of domestic violence

Also on AO3 and FFNet!

Braced myself for the goodbye,

'Cause that's all I've ever known

Then you took me by surprise

You said, "I'll never leave you alone"

Twelve hours ago Hailey’s morning had started out so wonderfully. She had been half asleep, anticipating the sounding of her alarm to wake her for the day, but instead she was woken up with Jay’s lips ghosting over her skin. It was dreamlike, a glimpse of what heaven could be. She had smiled uncontrollably, wiggled against him, and when she rolled in his arms to face him she was greeted with a grin and his sleepy voice saying good morning.

“A very good morning indeed. Not a bad way to get woken up. Who’d have thought that elite Detective Jay Halstead would be such a sap? And a cuddler too.”

He had rolled his eyes at her, but there was a playful smirk on his face and he just pulled her closer against him. His arms wound under and around her and his hands pressed against her back. The feel of his fingers had sent goosebumps shooting out all across her skin.

“I think you love it,” he told her as he casted quick glances between her lips and her eyes.

“I do love it,” she said while moving her hand up his chest and around his neck to the back of his head.

He hummed out a response and leaned his head down closer so that little space was left between them.

“I love you,” he confessed.

He hadn’t given her a chance to respond and instead pressed his lips against hers for several moments, swallowing the moan that escaped her and not waiting or expecting her to say the words back.

The moment he said them and his lips were on hers, Hailey felt like she was floating. She knew she loved him, she had for a while, and a part of her knew he loved her too, but hearing the words as they fell from his lips was something she didn’t think she’d ever forget. It put an ache in her chest that was so good she wished she could bottle it up and keep it for forever.

The moment was cut short when they’d been interrupted yet again by a ringing phone and before she could say the words back that she so desperately wanted to say to him, they had to get dressed and head into the district. What Hailey hadn’t anticipated was the case they’re pulled into wrecking her beyond comprehension.

What was supposed to be a simple wellness check quickly turned into a search for a missing family and an ugly domestic violence case that Intelligence took the lead on. And in the process of connecting the dots and weeding through the lies of an abuser, Hailey was forced to remember her past and the monster her own father had been while she was growing up. The monster he could still be.

By the time the case is over and the last of the files have been closed, Hailey is completely deteriorated from the workday. She just wants to crawl into bed and try to forget, but when she enters her apartment she quickly spots a hoodie hanging over the back of her couch that doesn’t belong to her. Suddenly her heart aches again as she thinks about her partner.

Jay had been an anchor for her throughout the day just as he’d always been since they became partners. He kept her grounded without being overbearing, letting her know he was there for her and by her side. But as the day went on Hailey reflects on the abuse she doesn’t think she’ll ever really fully move on from.

Weekends that were supposed to be spent having fun with her brothers and being normal kids were instead spent running to the nearest sibling’s bedroom and locking the door when her father had drunk one too many beers.

His voice was always so loud when he was yelling that Hailey could swear the whole house would shake. He’d start downstairs, shouting at her mother, knocking his fists into her first, and when she’d sink to the floor or pass out he’d go in search of Hailey or one of her brothers.

There are moments she can remember so vividly hiding in so many places to avoid her father’s hands or whatever belt or cord he had been able to find. The back of a closet, the bathtub, under the dining room table, the shed out back when it wasn’t too cold. She’d spent so much of her childhood hiding and fearing her father, watching the relationship between him and her mother zig zag and spiral, that most days Hailey’s not sure how she turned out to be even remotely sane or normal by any means. She remembers how he’d always apologize to them all, tell them he loved them. Like loving someone and beating the crap out of them were synonymous and one in the same.

She tries so hard to not compare her life with her father to her relationship with Jay, but she can’t help it. She knows deep down that her partner would never think of hurting her the way her father has, but after the day she’s had and the too much time she’s had to think, she’s also unsure if she can love him back the way he deserves. She wonders if maybe it was a sign from the universe when they were interrupted earlier in the morning before she could say the words back to him that he so easily could say to her.

Maybe she wasn’t supposed to say them.

Maybe she wasn’t supposed to love him.

There’s a knock that breaks Hailey out of her thoughts and she makes her way to the door. She glances through the peephole and sighs.

Of course it’s him. Who else would it be?

She considers not opening it, but then thinks of what she has to do and the conversation that needs to be had so she opens the door and forces out a smile as she looks up at her partner.

“Hey,” Hailey nearly whispers.

“Hi,” he says back with a half-smile.

She lets him enter the apartment and closes the door behind him. She makes her way towards the kitchen, leans back against the island, and then nods to the couch.

“You left your hoodie here,” she tells him.

He glances to the couch and looks back at her, gives a short nod. “I didn’t come here for my hoodie. I wanted to see you, make sure you’re okay.”

“I’m...dealing,” she says slowly, as if trying to find the right words to say.

He waits for her to start and steer the conversation, but when she doesn’t he takes a small step towards her.

“Do you want me to leave?” He asks even though it’s the last thing he wants to do.

She shakes her head, but it doesn’t give him the relief it should. Not when she’s looking at him the way she is, as if she’s about to give him the worst news of his life.

“We should talk. I’m sure you have questions,” she says as she crosses her arms over her chest.

“Maybe, but you know you don’t need to tell me anything you’re not comfortable with, Hailey. I’m not gonna push you,” he tells her.

She does know, but she also knows she has to do this while she still has some nerve left.

“I need to tell you this. I need you to understand.”

He nods and gestures to the couch. “You wanna sit?”

She shakes her head and he shuffles his weight to his other foot as he stuffs his hands into his coat pockets. He can tell she needs a moment. He’s always been able to read her, give her exactly what she needs without saying a word, so he waits until she takes a deep breath and then she speaks.

“I don’t think I ever really learned relationships,” she starts, but her eyes don’t meet his as if she’s somewhere else entirely and not standing there in the same room with him.

“My parents didn’t exactly give me and my brothers the greatest example of what one should look like. My dad - he used us all like his own personal punching bags. And my mom, she took it. She just took it every single time and I never really understood it when I was little. Five year old me couldn’t understand why daddy was hurting mommy. It got to a point where it was just normal, expected. And as I got older, I still didn’t ever fully understand it. I think maybe it just happened so much that it was burned into my mom’s brain that, that’s what love is. That it’s okay if someone hurts you as long as they say they love you and they’re sorry after.

“I’ve had boyfriends and I’ve loved them, or tried to anyway, but relationships haven’t ever been easy for me. It’s like a what-if game constantly playing in my head, like a voice in the back of my mind that I can’t ever silence completely. And it gets loud. It gets so loud sometimes. The second-guessing and the wondering if there’s an ulterior motive for things someone says or does. It’s something I’ve never been able to turn off. It’s something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to turn off. Like it’s burned into my brain too. There are parts of me that are just unfixable. Parts of me that I don’t think will ever fully heal.”

There’s a look on her face that Jay knows all too well and he braces himself for what’s about to come. He watches Hailey lean back against the island and she tightens her arms across her chest almost defensively. He doesn’t say a word though, just gives her a nod telling her to continue and waits for it.

“Being your partner is easy for me, Jay. Being your friend is easy. And I know we didn’t ever label whatever it is that we’ve been doing, but I don’t really know how to be a girlfriend. Especially a girlfriend who works with their boyfriend. I’ve tried it before and I don’t know how to be that person. Maybe it’s because of my parents. Maybe I just don’t really know how to love either and that’s not fair to you. Even with Garrett. I know I loved him, but I just – I didn’t know how to. And in the end he paid the ultimate price for loving me.”

Hailey pauses, takes a breath, and then continues. “I don’t wanna hurt you, Jay. I don’t want you to get hurt. You’ve been so good to me and I like being with you, but I – I don’t...”

She looks away from him as she blows out another breath, unable to finish her sentence, but he does it for her.

“You want it to be over,” he says.

The dejected tone of his voice sends a pang through her chest and she nods her head slowly as she meets his eyes again. There’s a sadness in them she doesn’t think she’s ever seen before.

“I think that might be best for both of us. I shouldn’t have – I thought I could do it. That night in the bar when I told you about the job offer and you kissed me? I wanted that for so long. I wanted you. But I’m beginning to realize that just because you want something it doesn’t mean you should have it. And I would never forgive myself if I hurt you down the road by saying or doing something stupid in the heat of the moment. Not after everything you’ve already been through. You don’t deserve that and you shouldn’t have to live with that possibility or my issues. You shouldn’t want that. So, yeah. I want it to be over for both of our sakes.”

She’s not sure what he’s thinking and it’s the first time in a long time that she can’t read him, but it doesn’t matter. She doesn’t want to do this, wishes it could be different. That she could be different. But it’s not and she’s not, and she’s afraid that if it doesn’t happen now then both of them will just hurt each other later. So she does the hard part for the both of them, ripping it off clean like a Band-Aid, and ignoring the sting it leaves.

She’s not sure how much time passes as she watches him and waits for him to speak. She can tell he’s thinking too hard, digesting what she’s told him, and the longer he’s silent the more she thinks that her decision to end it all right here is the right call, but then he surprises her when he looks up at her with glistening eyes full of love and compassion and understanding. Everything that he is. She’s not sure she deserves it.

Jay shakes his head slowly as he looks at her from a few feet away. He’s kept his distance, not wanting to make her feel cornered or not in control of the conversation and situation, but then he takes a few steps toward. His eyes burn into hers and she feels her heart pounding relentlessly inside her chest.

“You said you don’t know how to love, but I don’t think that’s true. Hailey, if it weren’t for you being my partner, for your friendship, your love for me - platonic or otherwise, I wouldn’t be here right now. I probably wouldn’t be alive right now.”

His voice is low, almost guttural, as if he’s lost his voice and it’s too painful to speak, but he keeps his eyes on her and goes on still.

“Hailey, you’re the person who loved me enough to make me realize I needed therapy. You’re the one who loved me even after knowing about my own past and the demons I have. My PTSD, what happened with Erin, my dad. You showed me every time you’ve stuck by my side and trusted my decisions even when others didn’t. You showed me when you chose to stay here instead of taking that job in New York. No one has ever chosen me over anything like that before. Not even my own brother. You have showed me countless times you love me without ever saying the words. But that word means something different to you because of your family and I get it. I don’t need to hear you say you love me to know that you do.”

He takes slow, hesitant steps towards her until he’s standing in front of her within arm’s reach to still give her, her space. He looks at her with tears still in his eyes, trying to keep them from falling, as he watches her own roll down her cheeks now.

“I’m not going anywhere Hailey. I know things haven’t been easy for you, they haven’t been fair or made sense. Life hasn’t been kind to you, but that doesn’t make me care about you or love you any less than I do, and it doesn’t make you unworthy of receiving that love either. The things you do for the people in your life, complete strangers even. You have the biggest and most beautiful heart of anyone I’ve ever known.

“You deserve this Hailey. We both do. I know you’re scared, I am too, but not because of your past. I’m scared of losing you. We don’t need to define anything or put a label on it if that’s what you wanna do. Girlfriend might be a bit of a weak term for you anyway when you’re so much more than that. We can take it one day at a time, take things as they come, but I want this. I want you. I wanna be with you.”

“Jay, I - “

“If you really want it to be over between us then I’ll respect your decision and I’ll walk out the door and we’ll never talk about it again. All I’m asking for is a chance to show you how it’s supposed to be, that love can be good. That it is good. That it doesn’t come with conditions or ulterior motives. That you deserve every good thing in this world. And I’ll be here to remind you when you think you don’t.”

He can see the wheels turning in her head, but her eyes are everywhere except on him now and he can’t quite read the look on her face, and it scares him.

There’s a fleeting moment where he knows he won’t come back from this, that she was it for him, but he won’t push her. He won’t do that to her. And when she finally meets his eyes again, but doesn’t say a word, he ignores the crushing of his chest and the sinking of his stomach, and takes a step forward to close the distance between them.

He knows what this is now.

Why she mentioned his forgotten hoodie. Why she didn’t wanna sit. Why she’s kept her distance.

She wasn’t intending for him to stay.

He lifts an arm slowly, not wanting to scare her, and rests the palm of his hand against the side of her face. He brushes his thumb over her cheek like he has a dozen times before now, realizing a second later that this might be the last and it sends an ache through him again. He leans forward and presses his lips to her forehead, lingering a few beats longer than he should, but if it’s the last time he kisses her he’s going to savor it. He removes his lips and drops his hand a moment later, and steps away from her.

When she still doesn’t speak all he can do is give a slow nod before he turns for the door. He doesn’t make it three steps before she calls out to him, her voice shaking and his name cracking in half as it falls from her lips. He stops mid-stride and she notices the slight hesitation from him before he turns around to face her, and then she sees that his tears have fallen. Tears for her. For them.

She knows what she is about to do is the hardest thing she’ll ever do and it’s terrifying, but not as terrifying as it would be if she let him walk out her door for good.

“I want that with you. The good kind of love. I want it and it scares the hell out of me,” she breathes out through hiccups and fresh tears.

It’s all he needs and then he’s walking towards her. He wraps his arms around her, holding her close and tight against him with one arm around her back and his other hand holding her head to his chest.

Her whole body shakes and she can’t stop crying now as she leans into him. And then she whispers, “I do love you and I want you to stay.”

He squeezes his arms around her in their embrace and presses his lips to the side of her head.

“I’ll stay,” he tells her, knowing it’s the only thing she needs to hear from him.

Her eyes close at the sound of his words and her entire body goes limp in his arms. It’s the first moment since the mess of their day on the job that she finally feels herself fully relax and be at ease. She grips his shoulder with a trembling hand, the rest of her body still shaking, but he continues to hold her up and hold her against him like the anchor he’s always been for her.

She knows he means staying more than just tonight and there’s a moment, maybe for the first time in her life, where the future doesn’t worry her or scare her. Not when it includes him, them.

#upstead #upstead fic #hailey upton #jay halstead #jay x hailey #chicago pd

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bluesylveon2 · 3 years

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How to Confess to a Guy

Summary: Levi and Hange have a crush on one another for years. It is now time for someone to step up and confess!

Disclaimer: Attack on Titan is a manga/anime series written by Hajime Isayama and published by Kondasha

A/N: @levihanweek Thank you for hosting the Levihan Eggschange event! I enjoyed participating in it.

To my giftee, I hope you find your gift and enjoy it. I hope the clues I gave you helped as well. Enjoy! :)

Camp Paradis is a 7-week, 400-acre summer camp for teenagers hidden deep in the woods of Washington state. Founded in the 1950s by the Fritz family, it is run by Dot Pixis, a man famous for his many achievements when he was a camper many years ago. It is known for offering a variety of activities for each camper. Some activities included fishing, sailing, swimming, paddle boarding, and more!

The camp had a small lake with 12 cabins surrounding it. Each cabin had three campers and one counselor. Each camp counselor was typically seniors and college students. Additionally, there was an even bigger lake, Lake Maria, where the camp's rival, Camp Marley, resided across. Camp Marley was also 7 weeks but had 500 acres, and it was by Theo Magath.

No two counselors in Camp Paradis are alike. Each counselor is unique. For example, Erwin Smith, the counselor for Ursus cabin, is greatly admired by his campers because of his dedication and leadership quality. He is the counselor who typically leads his cabin to victory every year at the Paradis games that occur at the last week of camp.

On the other hand, Levi Ackerman, the counselor for Vulpes cabin, was known as very strict with his campers. Other campers from other cabins note how it always smells like detergent, and his campers clean the cabin often.

(They are in the woods, for crying out loud! How did he manage to bring all of the cleaning supplies? This remained a mystery to everyone except in the Vulpes cabin.)

Just like any other teenage-related camp, the campers always spread rumors to relieve their boredom. Some of which have not been debunked.

Rumor 1: Bigfoot is hidden somewhere deep in the woods that has yet to be found. There were occasional sightings near the camp in the previous years. Dot Pixis himself almost caught him one day but failed. Anyone who can find and capture Bigfoot can earn a generous reward from Pixis. Eren and his friends actually tried to look for it but ran into his older half-brother, Zeke, instead (he kind of looked like one in the dark). He and his friends did not realize they walked all the way to Camp Marley.

Rumor 2: Someone went to Camp Marley to serenade Annie Leonhart when she was outside playing the piano. Annie refused to reveal who, yet she blushed every time someone from Camp Marley asked. Someone (*cough Ymir) had an idea who. Some campers claimed to see Ymir often tease Armin after the rumors started. It is possible the Armin did it.

Rumor 3: Levi Ackerman likes Hange Zoe from Strix cabin and vice versa. Actually, it seemed more like a fact than a rumor to everyone except them.

Let's look at the evidence:

Evidence 1: Levi always takes care of Hange when she forgets to take care of herself. It typically ranges from, but not limited to: making sure she eats, jumping into any time she is at risk for injury without a second thought, tending to her wounds when she does get hurt, forcing her to bathe (Connie accidentally walked into it once. He vowed to constantly check on Levi and Hange's whereabouts before he gets killed by Levi's death glare), and "accidentally" eliminating any suitors Hange may have.

(He does not actually kill them or anything. That is against camp rules. There was one time when Zeke Yeager went to Camp Paradis to confess his feelings to Hange. He actually almost made it to her cabin but a random shoe "accidentally" hit him on the head, causing him to stumble and fall into the lake. No one knows how he fell, but Hange walked out to see what was going on. She saw Levi drinking tea nearby, while mysteriously missing a shoe, and went to him. Apparently, she did not see Zeke at all, so Zeke had to get help from Pieck, who was hiding nearby)

Evidence 2: Hange rants to Levi about her latest research back home. Hange can talk anyone into sleeping with the amount of research she does. Yet, Levi stays up to listen. It could be because of his insomnia, but he never gets tired of listening to her rants. Other campers note that he at least looks interested every time Hange rants.

Evidence 3: The one incident last year when Hange was jealous and did not talk to Levi for half of the camp duration. There was a rumor going around that Levi was dating Petra, counselor of Lynx cabin. As a result, Hange hung out with Moblit, counselor of Lupus cabin, more that year instead. Hange claimed it was to give the couple space, but only her closest friends could tell something was up.

For instance, Eren was hiking on another expedition to find Bigfoot when he ran into Hange, kicking down a tree in anger. Eren immediately ran back to camp in hopes that Hange did not notice him and broke his bones. He was actually intimidated by her for a week.

(In reality, Hange was so sure Levi was going to confess to her that year. Additionally, Levi was jealous of how Hange spent time with Moblit more. Not everyone in camp could tell except for his campers Eren, Jean, and Connie. They could feel the chills running down their spines every time Levi was in the cabin with them, and it was summer.)

Evidence 4: Levi was always by Hange's side. Anyone in the camp can tell you that Levi is at least nearby Hange unless it is for very personal reasons (except bathing). He mainly stayed close to her after last year's incident when he literally kicked down her door and cleared the misunderstandings.

(In reality, Levi and Petra were not dating. Petra had confided to Levi about dating advice (for a reason he is unaware of, except everyone in the camp *cough Hange *cough). In the end, Levi remained single and had to fix the Strix cabin's door. On the bright side, Petra started dating Oluo Bozado from Meles cabin.)

Neither party had ever confessed to one another despite all the evidence proving that they have feelings for one another. Now that both Levi and Hange are about to graduate high school, it was the perfect time to confess before they go their separate ways because of their careers.

However, life is very unexpected, and when you add Hange to the mix…

Well, anything goes.

---

"This is it," Hange said to herself as she got everything ready in her canoe. She was prepared to sail across the lake towards Levi's cabin.

Both cabins were situated on different sides of the lake. The camp was designed so one half was for boys and the other half was for girls. It was a very dumb inconvenience for Hange.

Hange scoffed as she sat down on the canoe and began rowing. "Why couldn't our cabins be placed next to each other. It would give me less work to do." The only guy and girl cabins next to each other were Petra's cabin and Mike's cabin.

Hange decided that today was the day she will confess to Levi. They have been in an awkward "does he/she like me? does he/she not?" for years now, and none of them confessed at all. There are even rumors about it, for crying out loud!

The two had met three years ago when Hange and Levi were campers at Camp Paradis. It was really unexpected. Hange was ready to get down in the dirt during the activities and often kept some insects to study. On the other hand, Levi was a clean freak and a prodigy at the camp activities. It became sort of like a friendly competition between the two, and then they suddenly started hanging out more. They have known each other for years. She even calls herself his best friend.

(She never realized how recently Levi would scowl every time she claimed to be his best friend. To him, she was much more than that.)

Overall, Hange would look forward to seeing Levi again every summer.

It has been four years of dancing around whatever they have that Hange now dared herself to confess before the summer ends, and they leave for college. It is better to do something and get rejected (which she hopes does not happen) than do nothing.

Hange stopped rowing when she got close enough that Levi has to hear her. She could make out his figure sitting on the front steps of his cabin with Mike, Erwin, and Furlan.

She sets the oar to the side, takes a deep breath, and presses play on the small radio she took from Rico's cabin. The beginning notes of the song plays in the air.

You can do this

Hange began to sing the first line.

---

Minutes before

Mike, Erwin, and Furlan were talking about who knows what, not Levi was not paying attention anyway. His mind was preoccupied with a certain eccentric girl he knew.

She was very secretive lately. Sometimes she would freak out whenever Levi approached her, and he has not seen her all day. He even planned on confessing to her after dinner. It seemed as if Hange was preoccupied with something.

Levi would not even get to say one word before Hange ran off, claiming she is busy and cannot be disturbed.

Levi scowled at the thought. Hange would usually tell him beforehand if she is busy, but her saying nothing? Something is definitely up, but she wants to not tell him then it was fine by him (or so he says).

Furlan, who noticed Levi's brooding, smirked. "Hey Levi, are you thinking about Hange again?"

Mike and Erwin stopped talking and smirked as well.

Levi rolled his eyes. "I was not thinking about Hange. At all." He said in a serious tone.

"Mhmm," Furlan replied. He shifted in his spot and gave Levi a smug look. He was not convinced.

"Don't hide it, Levi," Mike added. "We all know how you go goo-goo eyes every time Hange enters the room. You are always checking up on her too."

"I don't make goo-goo eyes at Hange," Levi deadpanned with a monotone voice. "I only check up on her because it is a miracle she can see those dirty her glasses she wears."

Erwin's smirk never faded away as he lightly elbows Furlan on the side. "He always calls her by two nicknames, Furlan. He gives anyone more than one nickname too. They might not sound endearing, but he rarely calls Hange by her name."

"Can you imagine what Levi is thinking now?" Furlan laughed. He turned around from his spot, so he back faced Levi, hugged himself, and started making fake kissing noises.

"Oh, Hange! I don't want to be just friends with you. I will marry you, and we're going to have 100 bab-"

Levi slapped Furlan on the head. He stood up the moment Furlan spoke. Mike and Erwin were in the background howling with laughter.

"Cut the crap, Furlan," Levi said and made his way back to his spot on the steps.

"Ok, ok. You win, Levi." Furlan rubbed the back of his head where Levi had slapped him. Luckily for him, Levi did not hit him too hard, and it did not hurt that badly. He goes back to talking to Mike and Erwin about other counselors about other rumors they heard. He will tease Levi again later.

Meanwhile, Levi rolled his eyes at his friend's childishness and began to think about the subject of his earlier torment. It was already almost dinner time, and he has not seen Hange all day. He was hoping she would at least appear for dinner, or else he would have to drag her to the dining hall by force.

Levi was busy with his thoughts and staring at his feet to notice anything around him. He was too busy to focus on the music playing, and the girl he (does not) have a crush on making her way over from across the lake.

"Uhh, Levi?" Furlan spoke while looking at the lake. Levi ignored him; instead, he was too busy thinking about Hange to notice she was heading towards him at that very moment.

Mike and Erwin turned to face what Furlan was staring at. Their jaws dropped.

On Lake Sina was the one and only Hange Zoe making her way towards Levi's cabin on a canoe while singing the song "We Belong" by Pat Benatar so loud that everyone in the camp could hear her. She also wore shorts and a camp T-shirt. She did not wear a life jacket.

Talk about romantic.

"Levi!" Mike said urgently and shook his shoulder.

"What?" Levi turned to Mike. He was irritated by his friends messing with him about his crush (yes, he will admit it but not out loud to his nosy friends).

What else did they need now? They could always bother someone else.

Levi noticed where Mike was pointing to and was about to turn in said direction until he heard a voice coming from somewhere behind him.

"Well, it seems like you won't die a virgin after all, huh, shortass? Who knew?"

Levi knew that voice. His cousin, Mikasa, from Cervidae cabin, Levi had the pleasure (not) of watching over at this camp. It was a good thing he did not have to deal with her and her obvious crush on Eren Jaeger. He did feel bad for Rico because she had to deal with that gloomy brat in her cabin.

Levi turned around to face his cousin. She was standing a few feet away from him with a few of her friends that he recognized. The tall, brunette one with her hair in a ponytail, Sasha, also from Cervidae cabin, was eating a sandwich (she probably got it from the camp across the lake). She must have raided Camp Marley recently.

(They have a chef there who can apparently make really delicious food. Levi only knew because Hange planned on kidnapping him one time just to try some).

Mikasa's other friend, Historia, the short blonde-haired girl from Lynx cabin, smiled pleasantly at Levi.

"What are you talking about, brat?" he glared at Mikasa.

Historia giggled and pointed in the direction of the lake. "Over by the lake. Can't you hear Hange singing? I knew she could sing, but wow! I wonder if she is singing to a lucky guy? That would be so adorable!"

Levi's eyes widen in surprise. He tuned out Historia's gushing when it hit him.

That means…Hange...oh no.

He turned his head to find that Hange was indeed singing and making her way towards his direction.

His direction!

Erwin and Mike noticed the blush on Levi's face and smirked. Furlan clamped his hand on Levi's shoulder like a proud dad. Levi could hear the smirk in Furlan's voice that he would love to punch away if it weren't for Hange.

"I wonder who the guy is too, Historia. He is indeed a lucky guy."

Levi shook Furlan off and started heading towards Hange.

Hange noticed Levi coming closer and stops rowing. She dropped her oar off to the side.

"Hey! Levi!" She yelled out loud while waving her arms around.

She did not have to yell so loudly, though. The sound traveled perfectly from her mouth and into Levi's ear within seconds because of the lake.

He began speed walking towards Hange.

There was a voice in the background yelling something about how Hange was doing great so far. It sounded like Nifa, but Levi was too busy to check. He needed to get to Hange first.

Levi watched as Hange accidentally drops her oar into the lake when she moved back to row some more. Hange, scrambling to retrieve it, said an "I got it!" in her normal voice until she accidentally tripped and fell into the lake.

She was not wearing a life jacket on either.

Levi stopped speed walking and ran towards Hange. Once he was close to the lake, and without thinking, he took off his shirt and dove into the lake to save Hange.

---

Also a few minutes ago

"I know Hange is a smart girl and all, but wouldn't it have been easier to just walk around the lake to confess to Levi?" Nanaba asked aloud as she took a sip from her water bottle. Some sweat dripped down her brow from being out in the sun all day.

Nanaba sat on the steps of her cabin (Alces) while her campers was out and about. Her cabin was next to Hange's, and she even helped Hange prepare before her big love confession.

Rico, who walked by earlier to see why Nanaba was staring at the lake, sighed from Nanaba's right. "Love does weird things to you, Nanaba. Remember when Mike confessed to you last year? I wonder why do people from this camp confess while using the lakes, though?" She questioned while recalling that one rumor and how Mike confessed to Nanaba by bringing her to a picnic near Lake Maria.

Nanaba laughed and turned to Rico while wiggling her eyebrows. She grinned like the Cheshire Cat. "So when are you going to get a canoe across the lake and confess to Ian?" she said while gesturing to Hange, who was still singing to Levi.

Rico blushed and elbowed Nanaba's side. "Shut up! I do not like Ian like that! Mind your own business!" She turned away from Nanaba and crossed her arms in front of her chest. Her face was still red.

Nanaba turned back to watch Hange sing and rests her chin on the palm of her hand. Her elbow was resting on her thigh. "Mhmm. Go tell yourself that."

"I think it's a cute idea. It would be very boring and tiresome to walk around the lake just to confess. Serenading on the lake is much more unique." Nifa, counselor of Tamias cabin, piped up from Nanaba's left. She had heard Hange's singing nearby and was curious about what was going on. She sat next to Nanaba. It seemed like Nanaba knew what was going on.

Ah. It seemed that Nifa also joined in on the watch party, Nanaba thought. Now a good chunk of the camp was curious about Hange's business.

The trio watched as Hange rowed closer to Levi. This time, some of the campers from the other cabins watched Hange from Levi's side. They did not stand close but a far distance instead. They were curious about what was going on and did not want to get too close to suffer from Levi's wrath.

They all watched as Levi stood up from his spot and began speed walking towards the lake. Meanwhile, Hange continued to sing her song.

Nifa brought her hands up to her face and cupped them around her mouth to amplify her voice.

"You're doing great, sweetie!"

Hange was doing great. Indeed, she was almost at her destination. All she had to do was pick up the oar and go back to rowing…

Until she accidentally dropped her oar, causing Levi to start running towards her.

They could not hear what Hange said, but they could assume she was trying to reassure Levi that she was ok and to retrieve the oar...until she misstepped and fell into the lake.

Oops.

Nanaba and Rico turned to Nifa with a shocked look. Nifa held her hands up in innocence.

"I swear. I did not mean or intend for all of that to happen."

"We have to help Hange!" Nanaba yelled. Both she and Rico stood up to try to help Hange but stopped by Nifa, grabbing the back of their shirts.

"What are you doing, Nifa?" Nanaba said with irritation. Nifa did not say anything but nodded her head towards the lake. She lets go of their shirts after they brought their attention to the lake too.

The girls watched as Levi took his shirt off and dove into the lake to save Hange.

Problem solved.

"Doesn't Levi know that Hange is a good swimmer?" Nifa asked from behind Nanaba.

Rico scoffed. "You tell me. I always have to train for the swimming competitions, but I can never beat her." Rico always dreaded when her cabin was put up against Hange’s. She usually placed at either second or third place. No one could outswim Hange, not even Levi.

They watched as Levi grabbed Hange, threw her over his shoulder, and made his way back to his cabin. The onlookers made a path for him because they were too scared to focus on Levi.

The girls sighed with relief. This was practically a typical day at Camp Paradis.

Nanaba turned to Rico and Nifa. "Anyone up for a snack at the dining hall?"

After everything they just saw, Rico and Nifa both nodded in agreement.

---

"Is the cabin empty?" Hange asked from behind the bathroom door. It has been an hour since the incident. Levi had dragged her into his cabin, and he threw her into his bathroom. He also gave her some of his extra set of clothes and demanded that she took a bath before she gets sick.

Each cabin has two bathrooms, so each camper only had to share with one person. Levi shoved Hange into his/Eren's bathroom while he took a shower in Jean/Connie's. Hange freshened up and clean, stood stationary behind the bathroom door. She practically smelled like Levi. From the soap, she used to the clothes she wore. They all smelled like the definition of clean.

"Yes." That was all Levi replied with a slightly irritated tone in his voice.

Hange groaned from behind the door and rested her forehead on the hardwood. That was the voice Levi would use when he was ready to lecture her. She leaned her head back and placed her hand on the doorknob. She took a deep breath as she opened the door and met Levi's expecting face. His eyebrows were furrowed slightly, he had his arms crossed over his chest, and he looked a bit irritated.

(Hange was thankful that he was dressed similarly to her and she did not walk out to see him shirtless)

She walked towards Levi, sitting on his bed. Each cabin is big enough for each camper to have a total of four beds. Each footstep was like a walk of shame for Hange. Yet, Levi did not say a word. He spoke up the moment she sat down next to him on the bed. The bed shifted down slightly from the extra weight.

"Hange, what were you thinking? You did not have a life jacket on, and you fell in the middle of the lake. You scared a lot of the camp and me. Be careful next time you pull something like that," He said while facing her, concern laced in his voice.

Hange rubbed the back of her neck nervously. She looked up to meet Levi's steel-gray eyes.

"I'm sorry I worried everyone, Levi. I will be more considerate next time. Although…"

Hange began to chuckle to herself at the memory of Levi umping in to save her.

"You know I'm a good swimmer, right?" She placed her hand on Levi's shoulder and shook it slightly. "I would have made it back just fine-"

She stopped shaking his shoulder and sets it down on her lap. "I appreciate you umping in to save me, though." She said with a grin.

Suddenly, Hange raised her hands and leaned forward. She wrapped both of her arms around Levi's midsection and pulled him close to her body for a hug. She rested her head on his shoulder.

"Thank you, Levi."

Levi prayed that Hange could not feel his heart pounding against his chest or see him blush. His crush was close to him, for crying out loud!

He moved his arms to hug Hange back. He could feel nervousness rising up in his body along with his rapid heartbeat. This is it. He will confess to Hange now, and it does not matter if he gets rejected or not. She had to know, even if the song she sang was for someone else.

Levi leaned back from Hange, but he maintained the hug. Their faces were only a few inches away from each other.

"Hange, I have something to tell you. I need you to hear me out for a few minutes."

Hange nodded in agreement. "Ok…" she said with some uncertainness. She was unsure what he was going to say, and he gave her the most serious look on his face. He stared deeply into her amber-brown eyes.

"I appreciate you."

Huh?

Hange tilted her head in confusion. "Come again, Levi."

Levi looked away and sighs. Ok. That was not a rejection. He just has to change tactics to get it to Hange and hopefully not make it sound awkward. Levi had no experience with him confessing before. Other girls had confessed to him, but it was with material stuff. He wanted to use words for his confession.

Levi looked up again and stared into Hange's eyes again. "I want to dedicate my heart to you." Ok, now that sounded a bit too much.

Levi continued speaking anyway before he could change tactics again.

"I just want to say that I like you, Hange." He said sincerely. "I like listening to you talk, your personality, and your humor. I want you to at least be aware before we go to college and if the song from earlier is not for me."

Levi stared at Hange's face and attempted to read her emotions. Her eyes widened with shock, and her mouth was open in a small o. She stayed that way for a few minutes until the shock became full-on laughter.

Hange was laughing at him.

She let go of Levi and threw her head back. Her face was full of delight.

Usually, Levi would not mind listening to her laugh, even if it was at him. It was one of his favorite sounds to her, not that she needed to know that.

However, this is different from before. Levi frowned but did not make a move to stand up. He needed an explanation for this.

Hange turned back to Levi after she calmed down a bit. "Levi." She said. Her voice had some laughter evident in her voice. Here comes the rejection.

"The song was for you."

What?

Levi only blinked in response. Hange began to swing her legs a bit and placed her hands on her lap. "I wanted to confess to you today, and I thought what serenade you from the lake." She explained.

"I guess I was too excited to miss some necessities. Sorry about that, by the way."

She leaned forward to grab Levi's right hand. Levi made no move to remove it, so she interlocks their fingers together.

"But you beat me to it, huh, Levi?" She chuckled while staring down fondly at their hands.

Levi stared at their hands as well. He could not believe this. They were going to confess to each other on the same day.

Suddenly, Levi leaned forward to rest his head on Hange's shoulder. "Will you be my girlfriend, Hange?"

Hange turned to Levi in shock. Levi moves his head to meet her eyes. The eyes he adores.

Hange smiled at him. Her eyes glowed with happiness. "Yes." That was enough for Levi.

He let go of Hange's hand and placed it on the back of her head. He grasped her hair a bit but not rough at all.

Hange watched as Levi leaned closer.

And closer.

Until they were a few centimeters apart. The cabin was quiet except for their breathing. Both of their breaths fanned each other's faces.

"What are you doing, Levi?" Hange asked with a hint of curiosity. She made no move to pull away, so Levi took it as a sign to explain his motives.

"Can I kiss you?"

Hange blinked a few times before nodding her head to give Levi an ok.

Levi closed the gap between the two. It was a short and sweet kiss. There heat or desire to move their relationship up to another base.

They leaned back from the kiss with a happy look on their faces. Hange had a goofy grin while Levi smiled at her. It was rare to see Levi smile, and Hange was delighted to be a source for it.

"That was my first kiss," Hange confessed.

"Mine too." Levi chuckled. His hand was still gripping Hange's hair. He kept his grip as he elated back on the bed, bringing Hange down with him.

"Levi!" Hange exclaimed and sat up on her elbows. Who knew Levi was so bold?

"What if the other campers see us?" She said with some nervousness.

Levi rolled his eyes and lightly flicked Hange's forehead. "We are not having sex. I'm just tired, and I want to take a nap with my girlfriend."

He smirked. "Besides, I sent my campers over to Furlan's cabin. They won't come back until we have to go to bed."

Hange looked at him suspiciously while rubbing her forehead from earlier. "You promise?"

Levi nodded his head. "I promise."

Hange let out a small yawn. It has been a long day. She moved so she can lay her body to the spot next to Levi. Meanwhile, Levi turned over to face his nightstand, so he can set his alarm for them to wake up before dinner. He then picked up the blanket and placed it over both of their bodies. They were both facing the wall.

"Sleep well, Hange." He spooned her from behind and placed a small kiss on the back of her neck.

Hange smiled before getting comfortable in Levi's arms. "Goodnight, Levi."

The two spent a few minutes in silence and tranquility. Levi was happy to spend some quality time with his dream girl.

“Hey, Levi. Use that dedicate your heart line for when you propose.” He can hear the smugness in Hange’s voice.

He lightly kicked her on the shin. “Go to sleep.”

Hange could not see it, but Levi had a small smile on his face as he drifted off to sleep.

---

"I KNEW IT!!!" Nanaba yelled while standing up and pointing at the new couple walking into the dining hall holding hands. Erwin and Mike were startled by the sudden outburst. Furlan was smirking victoriously. His friend, Isabel, rolled her eyes at Furlan's smirk.

(Petra, Nifa, Moblit, and Rico were sitting at another table noticed the couple at the doorway. Nifa and Petra squealed in delight while Rico and Moblit smiled. The other girls from Hange's cabin squealed as well since they secretly shipped her with Levi).

Levi and Hange stopped walking. Hange started laughing behind her free hand, and Levi gave Nanaba an annoyed look.

Everyone stopped eating to turn to the source of the sound. Nanaba, noticing the multiple stares, rubs the back of her head nervously and laughs. "Sorry about that, go back to eating."

Furlan smirked as Levi and Hange passed by the usual table to get some food. He turned to Isabel sitting next to him. He stuck his hand out to her and moved his fingers in pay-up motion. "Pay up, Isabel. I won the bet."

Isabel stuck out her tongue at him. "If only Levi-Bro waited until the end of the summer. I would have won 50 bucks," she said while reluctantly handing Furlan 50 dollars.

Furlan hummed in content and pocketed the money in his shorts pocket. "Appreciate the business, Izzy. Now, are you willing to put down money for when Levi and Hange get married?" He said and held his hand out for a handshake to seal the agreement.

Isabel smirked and shook Furlan's hand in agreement. "You're on, Furlan. We'll discuss this later." She turned away from Furlan and smiles at the couple coming to their table. "The new couple is coming here now."

"Hi everyone!" Hange beamed after sitting down across from Furlan. Levi sat between Hange and Nanaba.

Everyone at the table said hi in reply.

Erwin pushed his finish tray slightly on the table in front of him and turned to Hange. "Congratulations, Hange and Levi. I hope the two of you have a happy relationship."

Nanaba and Mike smiled as well. "Congrats, Levi," said Nanaba.

"Congrats, Hange," said Mike.

"I knew you could do it. Levi-Bro! You have had a crush on Hange since forever!" Isabel exaggerated the word forever.

Levi blushed, and Furlan smirked. He turned to Hange. "Say, Hange. How many kids-"

"Don't even finish that sentence, Furlan." Levi threatened, yet his face was still red from blushing. He did not want Furlan to bring up the conversation about children from earlier today.

Hange laughed from the interaction and leaned down to kiss Levi on the cheek. "Don't worry about him, Furlan." She leaned down towards his ear.

"We can discuss the number of children we would have later." She winked at him and went back to eating as if nothing happened between the two. Meanwhile, Levi opened his mouth slightly in shock. He did not expect that out of Hange! Mike, Erwin, and Furlan chuckled at this.

Nanaba (who luckily did not hear Hange) still noticed Levi's shock. "Levi, close your mouth before some flies get in." she lectured to him in a motherly tone. This broke Levi out of his shock, and he goes back to focus on eating.

Everyone continued talking and sharing any recent stories they had. Suddenly, Hange slammed her hands down on the table, shocking everyone at the table. She turned to face Levi.

"Levi! Where is Mikasa? We need to tell her about us!" She exclaimed and shook Levi's shoulders.

Oh, right. Hange would want to tell Mikasa about her new relationship since she saw Mikasa as family. Plus, they will most likely be an actual family in the future. Levi raised his hands up to grab Hange's and set it down on her lap. "Stop, Hange. She's probably eating with Eren and Armin. We can tell her later."

Erwin raised his eyebrows in confusion. "Actually, Levi. I haven't seen Mikasa ever since she showed up with Sasha and Historia. Isabel put her utensils down and joined in on the conversation.

"I saw her with Eren and Armin an hour before dinner. They were sitting together deep in a conversation…"

Levi looked up to scan his eyes across the dining hall. He noticed Armin's blonde hair sitting at his regular table with his friends. He sat at a table with Jean, Connie, Sasha, Ymir, and Historia. He noted how Armin noticed his stare and looked away as if he was scared of him.

Mikasa and Eren were nowhere in sight.

---

Bonus:

"Be careful, Eren!"

Mikasa said while raising her voice slightly. She did not want to yell, or else she might alert anyone in the forest.

"I'll be fine, Mikasa," he assured her. "I can feel it! Bigfoot is nearby." He said with excitement.

"This is the last time, Eren. We are already missing dinner, and who knows if Armin can stall for us any longer. Levi is going hunt us down. Plus, I don't want to end up in Camp Marley again."

Mikasa and Eren only had a few snacks on them. Mikasa managed to slip into her cabin to grab some from Sasha's secret stash. Sasha and Historia were busy watching the chaos at the lake.

"I promise, Mikasa. Thank you for coming with me. I don't think I can do this alone." He turned back to Mikasa with a big grin. He was also recalling the time he was searching in the forest to find Bigfoot and ran into an angry Hange instead,

Mikasa smiled in return, and the two continued their search to find Bigfoot.

Meanwhile, the two did not realize that they passed a figure watching them from a reasonable distance away behind a tree. Its eyes watched as the two humans continued their search. It slipped away sneakily into the darkness. It went away from Camp Paradis and towards the forest near Camp Marley instead.

---

Some quick notes:

I kinda based this fic off of one scene from Pitch Perfect 2 and other summer camp-related movies I watched (I don't have much knowledge of summer camp 😭)

Cabin names are based on scientific names of different animals

I hc Hange being good at swimming. Let's face it. If she can swim down a river while carrying a 65 kg man, and miraculously not get any gunshot wounds (not counting a spike in adrenaline to live); I'm sure Hange is a good swimmer.

#levihaneggschange2021 #levihan #levihan fanfiction #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #levihan eggschange

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d-criss-news · 3 years

Text

1883magazine.com

Darren Criss

On his new EP ‘Masquerade,’ the multi-talented Darren Criss welcomes everyone to the party.

Throughout his career, Darren Criss has never been one to shy away from boundaries. As an actor, he has won numerous awards and critical acclaim for his portrayal of Andrew Cunanan in Ryan Murphy’s award-winning drama American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace, as well as hearts and a cult-like following for his portrayal of Harry Potter in Team Starkid’s A Very Potter Musical. As a musician, his talent shows the same range; he is as well known for his ability to belt a broadway ballad as he is for his covers of Top 40 hits on Glee.

For Criss, this is because all music is simply music. Musicians and listeners alike need not box themselves into certain genres and while this concept is currently growing in mainstream media, it is one Criss has known since he was a teenager. At Warped Tour, he encountered fellow San Franciscans Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, a punk-rock cover band that specializes in the unexpected (their most played track on Spotify is Country Roads.). Inspired by what he’s always known was possible, Darren’s career has had freedom most artists take years to explore — and with his new EP, it’s clear that is the most recent chapter.

‘Masquerade’ is an exploration into Criss’ more eclectic side with each track on the record representing a different persona or masque for the artist. The overt character-driven quality of the EP lends not only to allowing fans to learn more about Darren Criss, but also to create a project where something can be found for everyone.

1883 Magazine spoke to Darren Criss about his perception of genre, his new EP, and the curse of creative people.

Congratulations on ‘Masquerade’. I love it. It’s so fun!

Fun is a very fair adjective, I would agree.

I feel like there’s a very cohesive vision or aesthetic to it. When you set out to make the project, did you have this end goal in min or were you just making music?

Yes and no. First and foremost, when you’re dealing with the whole of what an artist does, there are so many different facets that make the whole piece. To start, I’m just a songwriter — that’s the main thing that seeds everything else. But, because I’m a creative person, I’d like to think that I have a somewhat cohesive vision for my projects. However, you can conjecture and pontificate over what you want to happen, but ultimately a project is going to come out how it does. The thing that ties it all together, hopefully, is the artistry of the music or the person’s voice. When I heard you say “cohesive” my mind was like, “Phew!” Because we’re all scatterbrained people and we just constantly pray other people somehow think that we planned something or we had it envisioned all along, so to hear that is an enormous relief.

That being said, I had hope for how the EP would come together. I’ve been leaning into this notion of a character-driven song. The dirty secret about that is all songs are character-driven; all art is character-driven in some way or another. I just use that wording to aide folks that might be perceiving me as an actor and to apply that methodology to music.

How so?

I always thought it was a bit of an unfair double standard — where actors can be in a horror movie or romantic comedy — and we’re still behind that person as an actor. Actors can put on a prosthetic nose or a wig and do different things to service whatever story they’re doing. Historically music has been a little trickier, but now I think that’s changing. I’ve always been a self-proclaimed genrephile. I love so many different kinds of things. Growing up it was difficult for me to really assert this without confusing people. Now, that kaleidoscope has shifted in my favour, because people are more into eclecticism and musical diversity due to playlist culture and the whole homogeneity of everything. I’m employing this notion of being an actor and being behind a character and applying it to music by treating each song as its own kind of character. I want the art to correspond with that.

That’s an interesting concept to apply to music.

I know that everything I just said is horrifically more cerebral than it needs to be. If you like the music and it’s fun, great. I’m just trying to help people out that might be confused by perhaps some of the cognitive dissonance that’s happening between some of the styles. At the end of the day, it’s an artist’s voice, literal singing voice, and heart voice — what they have to say and how they say it — that tie everything together. People are more accepting of that than they used to be. This is exciting for me because I finally got to lean into something that I’ve always leaned into my entire life.

The last EP you released was ‘Homework’ in 2017. How do you think you’ve grown as an artist since then?

For me, obviously, there’s personal growth and professional growth. I think my growth is much more technical — getting better at recording music or being able to translate abstract ideas into physical recording — the things that I don’t think necessarily would be seen on the records. Again, much like an actor, ‘Homework’ was me playing the part of making a very low-key, singer/songwriter record. I’m a big believer in dressing for a party. I had some singer/songwriter songs that I wanted to honour. Each record I release shows a different version of myself that I haven’t gotten around to sharing.

The songs on ‘Masquerade’ are not like, “oh man in the past few years, I’ve suddenly become this person.” The EP was me finally getting in touch with my more Garage Band musician roots that I hadn’t been able to flex. It made sense to me to finally make this music. I had linked up with people that I thought could help me bring it to life in a way that hadn’t been done before and I felt like the timing was right. As I mentioned, it seemed like audiences might be a little more privy to this kind of thing.

I don’t want to be so stubborn as to think that there hasn’t been growth. I’ve been so lucky as an actor, that I’ve been busy as an actor. The only obstacle to me putting out more music, which I wish I was doing all the time, is time. I’m not an artist that just shows up, sings, and checks out. I’m writing, I’m producing, and I’m really in the weeds. It takes a great deal of investment, emotionally and mentally when I make music.

So, when you say, “you wish you were always releasing music,” do you mean to imply you have more music or at least ideas for more music?

I think the curse of creative people is that our ideas move faster than our bodies can execute. What this inevitably will create is a huge queue of unattended things that you will always be haunted by. From there, you have to catch as catch can. At any given moment, there’s still so much more in the queue that I want to put out. It literally took a global shutdown for me to finally have the time to look at the said queue, and say, “Okay, which project do I not only really want to do, but also do I have the resources to do and do I think fits into where I am right now?” Because I’m very cognisant of l where I am in my career. I have this huge selection of songs and when I have the time to focus on music, I go through and pick the ones I think fit where I am mentally and how I think other people are feeling.

With all these different genres of music you’ve released and all the music-centric projects that you’ve been a part of, is there a type of music that you enjoy performing the most?

I would say everything, but I don’t mean that in a way to just include everything. By nature, I’m a dot connector; I like shortening the distance between two things as much as possible and showing people how they can coexist. It’s my MO personally and professionally. Genre, while it has a lot to do with the cultural background and history of a type of music, is the boxes that we’ve arbitrarily made up to categorize and market music. I’m completely nondenominational when it comes to genre because all I can hear is chords, melody, and lyrics. It’s never been separated to me. When I’m performing live, I relish getting to lean in and bring together genres. I love using the setlist to show an audience how similar different genres are. For example, I’ll play a punk rock song and right after that I’ll sit at the piano and sing a ballad. My voice will be a little different, but it’s still my voice. Just like in acting, no matter what character an actor is portraying, it’s still their face and their body. Trying to minimize a distance between genres when I perform is an exciting prospect because I like getting audiences to rethink what they think they know about the differences between genre and how really at the end of the day it’s all just storytelling. So…I like performing it all.

I didn’t say you couldn’t say you liked everything. [Chuckles] That’s a perfectly acceptable answer.

I like putting all of it together specifically to show the similarities. Historically, all the great steps forward in a new kind of art form have been by mashing two or three seemingly unrelated things together. It’s happening constantly. It’s happening right now. Culture is a constant conversation back and forth. It’s a sharing of ideas that ebb and flow to create something new. I’m not saying that I’m taking part in this ancient conversation, but I’m certainly enjoying it. When I see pieces of it that I would like to showcase, I jump at the opportunity to do so.

Since ‘Masquerade’ has been in your creative bank for a while, what would you say inspired it?

Every song has its own inspiration. The album doesn’t really have an inspiration. If anything, I’m trying to make sure that I can show up for myself. I feel like with everything that I’ve done musically, I haven’t gotten to represent who and what I am and what I do. To me, this EP gets me closer to that goal. I still think that only a small percentage of me has been represented and that’s just because of time. I haven’t been able to focus on music in the way that I’d like, but ‘Masquerade’ is a huge stride for me.

Speaking of you being on Broadway, Elsie Fest is Sunday! On top of it just being exciting because it’s back, it’s your first public gig in almost two years. What did you miss most about the festival?

Listen, even without a global pandemic to worry about, putting on a music festival is hard enough. It’s one of my favourite times of the year because I’m very proud of what we’ve built and what we’ve continued to build and expand upon over the years. There’s been a community that has been built around not only people that come to the festival but people that have been part of it. I’ve followed these performers’ careers and I’ve been really grateful that we got a piece of their magic and got to be part of their journey at Elsie Fest. Magic which I can’t take credit for. I just lucked out with having incredible people perform. Over the years, we’ve had Cynthia Erivo perform twice. The first time she premiered a song called ‘You Will Be Found’ from a musical that would open in a year called ‘Dear Evan Hansen.’ We premiered a song from a movie called ‘The Greatest Showman.’ Keala Settle went on to win a Golden Globe for that song. Last year, we had a young girl from Disney sing for us — her name was Olivia Rodrigo. Those are just three examples. There’s been a lot of people that I’ve been thrilled to see do their thing. This year we have an incredible lineup. Barlow & Bear are coming, along with Jordan Fisher, Adrienne Warren, Pentatonix’s Kirstin Maldonado, and Alex Brightman. It’s gonna be great.

The obvious and the biggest answer is getting to perform live within as much of a safe and comfortable environment as humanly possible. Luckily we’re an outdoor festival, so that’s already to our advantage. I will be performing this new EP, but there is also a lot of music to catch up on and a lot of music I want to share. I’m mainly excited to share it with other human beings. I look at performing as a service industry. Everything that I do isn’t worth a whole lot unless other people experience it because it takes on a life of its own. The audience is not there for me & I’m there for them. I’m trying to service an experience that’s bigger than both of us and create something that couldn’t have been there if both parties were on their own.

Before I let you go, I need to tell you that Tramp Stamp Granny’s is one of my favourite bars in LA. I’m obsessed! I haven’t made it back yet. Like I said earlier, the editor Kelsey is also one of my best friends and when she comes, it’s top on my list of places to take her.

Really?! That makes me so happy. You couldn’t have said a better thing. We’re open again to limited capacity. We require vaccinations cards at the door and we’re only open Thursday-Saturday. Talk about being with people — the night we reopened, about a month ago, I got pretty emotional. It was nice to see people just being happy to sing and celebrate life with strangers. That was a really encouraging sentiment because despite the use of digital communication which I do think is an amazing thing, we, so clearly, inevitably, yearn for each other. Despite everything, people were coming to the bar and were so happy to be there and be around other people. Our need for other human beings is a constant that is extremely encouraging to me as a bleeding heart idealist. It’s nice to be a small part of that.

Finally, you said earlier Barlow and Bear were going to be at Elsie Fest. I cannot wait for the Unofficial Bridgerton Musical and was so excited to see you’re involved.

It’s cool meeting them because in a much more organized and impressive fashion they’re doing what my friends and I did ten years ago with ‘A Very Potter Musical.’ They are insanely talented and deserve to be the huge phenomenon they have become. They’re the future. I’m trying to grab onto their coattails however I can. [chuckles] They’re just getting started. I’ve been a big fan of Emily’s for a long time. She hates it when people say this, but [mock yells] she was a child prodigy and she still is. She’s an amazing human being.

Masquerade is out now.

Follow Darren Criss @darrencriss

Interview by Sydney Bolen

#darren criss #1883 magazine #elsie 2021 #masquerade ep #tramp stamp granny's #homework ep #press #august 2021

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purplecat4321 · 2 years

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Fahrenheit 451 is Bad

Everyone knows that Fahrenheit 451 is a terrible book, right? And yet teachers keep using it anyway because it’s a “””Literary Classic”””.

Well no more!

Guys, gals, and non-binary pals of Tumblr dot com, I present to you:

✨ How to fix Fahrenheit 451! ✨

🛑 !!! CW: Addiction, suicide !!! 🛑

Alright kiddos, buckle up cause this’ll be one wild ride.

First of all, Montag does not in any way fit into the world he’s in. We don’t know if the informative revolution came before or after he grew up, but he seems to be completely brainwashed so it’s safe to say that it came before. He seems to be completely satisfied until Clarisse wakes him up, even saying that “He wore his happiness as a mask…” (Bradbury 20), but he also doesn’t understand the people around him. The world is built to keep people satiated by keeping them busy, but Montag isn’t busy. He’s brainwashed in an entirely different way than everyone else, which makes no sense. So the first thing we’re gonna do is trash that.

He’s going to be just as addicted to the parlor walls as Mildred is (don’t worry, we’ll get to her later), and they’re going to be constantly telling him “life is wonderful and amazing be happy!” That’ll become his mantra, and when Clarisse comes up and is like yo, “’Are you happy?’” (Bradbury 17), he’ll repeat it in her face. Also, he’s not going to have his secret stash of books and he’s not going to immediately wake up, that’s dumb. He’s going to be just like the other firemen, completely robotic and ignoring Clarisse. “’The others would walk off and leave me talking’” (Bradbury 34). She’s going to approach him, ask her questions, and Montag’s going to subtly warn her off, but her words are going to stay with him. Something like the next night, he’s walking home and he suddenly remembers how she said, “’There’s dew on the grass in the morning’” (Bradbury 16) So he stops and looks for dew, then remembers himself and runs away. That’s what’s going to spark his awakening: when he acts on Clarisse’s influence without conscious thought.

So then he’s gonna start looking for Clarisse, and she’s going to approach him again, and he’s going to say “I saw the dew on the grass. What else is there?” And Clarisse is going to guide him through learning how to see things, same as in the book. “Have you seen the two-hundred-foot-long billboards in the country beyond town?” (Bradbury 16) “You smell like kerosene.” Little things that seem obvious but Montag didn’t notice and didn’t describe to us, the reader. His work’s going to be quiet for a bit as he slowly wakes up. The writing style is going to be directly influenced by Montag’s journey since we’re in his perspective. In the beginning, it’s going to be very direct and to-the-point, describing only what things are, like “he opened one of the cabinets along the wall” instead of “he swung the dark grey cabinet door open with a squeak, letting the light drive the shadows out from inside.” But It’s going to be a very subtle change so that we go from 1 in the beginning to 2 at the end without the reader noticing.

After life’s gotten a bit more interesting, Montag starts dreading going back into the parlor again because it’s mind-numbing and he wants to appreciate life, but also he’s never gone more than 12 hours without a parlor sesh. Just to sprinkle in a bit of angst, y’know?

Anyways inciting incident time, he’s going to go to another book-burning with his newly-awakened senses, but this time he’ll be overwhelmed by all the stuff he’s noticing; fire’s bright, smoke clouding his breath, deep gravel of Beatty’s voice as he says “are you good bro”, etc., etc. He regains composure, then has to actually burn books and he notices stuff about them, as well, which isn’t good for his job. He sees the careful binding, the foreword “to my son”, and he reads a few lines of poetry. “Time has fallen asleep in the afternoon sunshine” (Bradbury 51), for example. He doesn’t want to appreciate the books so he burns them harder and Beatty’s like “good work today soldier, wish you were that passionate all the time”. Then Montag goes home, avoiding Clarisse because she did this to him, and lays in bed trying to sleep because Mildred currently has the Seashells. The words he read circle around and around in his mind, he keeps telling himself it's utter nonsense, but they just won’t leave, like a song stuck in his head playing on loop. “Time has fallen asleep in the afternoon sunshine. Time has fallen asleep in the afternoon sunshine. Time has fallen asleep in the afternoon sunshine.” Mildred had committed unalivement right before he got home, so he tries to wake her up to discuss the poetry and she’s dead. 🎉 The pumpers arrive as normal, yadda yadda, pretty much everything’s the same as this part of the book (22-25 for reference), except the next morning neither of them mentions it (I’m so hungry, what happened last night?) (Oh nothing dear we just had a wild party) (Yes yes a party, “Hope I didn’t do anything foolish at the party” (Bradbury 29).).

He tries his best to un-swallow the red pill over the next couple of days but is unsuccessful. He notices stuff about the actual function of the world to give the readers more insight into how stuff works, all the while cursing his new powers of observation. In the shower one day he finally breakdown breakdowns (pah pah pah pah), and he remembers seeing Millie’s dead body and cries about it, then he has an epiphany—those poetry lines that he can’t get out of his head directly relate to however he feels about Millie’s death; he now understands the Poetry and that revelation fills him with dopamine, a sense of purpose and accomplishment. He tries to find Clarisse, but she’s dead now :D (“Run over by a car. Four days ago. I’m not sure. But I think she’s dead” (Bradbury 63).)

Now he’s filled with dreaded curiosity, and he really wants to read more poetry, despite it going against all his beliefs and stuff. So he steals the book of poetry, and he gets away with it—he reads it to go to sleep each night, as Millie sleeps. He falls into this new habit of having a poem a day he tries to connect to his world, and he gets better and better at thinking. I said we’d get back to Millie and we are. Millie’s also going to be working a job, and she and Montag are going to work together as partners instead of Montag being the provider. They work opposite shifts, her the day and Montag the night, so they hardly ever see each other, but they need each other to keep going, both financially and emotionally. They don’t romantically love each other, but they help each other out like friends would. This is where I’m going to end it for today. I have no idea how the world actually works outside of Montag’s life, so I have no clue how he could reverse the change the government has brought. Also I’m tired. My fingers hurt. If this gets 1,000 notes, I’ll make a part 2 about my theories and possible endings. Until then 💖

(Also if someone actually wants to rewrite Fahrenheit according to this you have my complete permission, please please do <3)

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jellyfishinc · 3 years

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Day 4

S1E3 Gold Meddlers

Ah yes. A nice little sketch firing shots at the Olympics, starring the Warners.

Starts off innocent enough, where the Warners are camping and are about to break out the s'mores.

Only problem? Wakko forgot the chocolate! Oh the tragedy! (I'm not entirely convinced Wakko didn't just eat it all and forgot.)

And then, they meet Nils Niedhart, who's described as a "lazily rendered stereotype", there to compete in the Olympics for gold medals.

Apparently the Warners have been camping on the Olympics torch, and Nils won't have them ruining his glory of bringing home the gold.

Upon seeing the medals themselves, they assume the medals are actually high quality chocolate wrapped in gold foil, and decide they're going to enter the Olympics themselves to win them.

As a side note, I think the Olympics would be waaaaaaaay better if the medals were chocolate instead of metal, but that's just me.

Nils wraps them up in their rent and throws them across the world.

Yakko can't help but toss in a pun about it being very "in-tents", and we see THIS.

It's confirmed, folks! Mime is back!

So, after their quick trip around the world in 8 seconds, they declare they will be competing against Nils for the gold medals.

First up: the high dive, and my main man Yakko is the one taking the plunge.

After Nils takes his turn, Wakko and Dot say THIS.

Someone said that this episode was also poking fun at character continuity, to further distance itself from the original show, but I just can't fully buy that.

I sincerely can't recall any sketches where it shows he's bad at math, but it HAS been proven more than once that Yakko's actually pretty damn good at math, to where he even impressed an entire hall of mathematicians enough to where they gave him a standing O.

(Source: Super Strong Warner siblings, and to save you time, just type that into the search bar on my dash, and you'll see what I'm talking about.)

If the bad at math thing turns out to be true, I offer you this: It's only certain types of math he's bad at, much like any other person on the planet can relate to. Take me as an example. My mathematic expertise is in algebra, but put me in geometry or business math, and I'm lost.

Anyway, back to the sketch.

As Yakko prepares to take his own turn at the high dive, we hear Dot confirming what we knew all along.

Yakko obviously wins, and it's Dot's turn, this time in equestrian.

And we get THIS typical sibling banter, with Wakko firing shots at Yakko's World.

And the fact that the songs playing in the background while he does so doesn't hurt either.

Another side note: based off my personal experience, the reason Yakko's is more popular is because we only needed to know the state capitals back in elementary school, whereas in high school we were constantly having to memorize different countries of the world depending on what region we were studying.

And if I'm being honest? Of the two, all I remember is the first verse of Wakko's America, all the way up to Nashville. Which is no one's fault, other than my own for having a crappy memory.

Anyway, they all watch as Dot gets ready to take her turn with a donkey, which turns into a pegasus right before the judge's eyes, and we see THIS.

With a horse like that, it's no wonder she wins, and then it's Wakko's turn.

The event? Ping Pong!

Which Wakko wins in a technicality that states he can in fact eat the ping pong balls and spit them back out.

That's when Nils gets really fired up, and declares he's done going easy on them.

Next up is volleyball, where all three of them are working together, and I just want to take a moment here to show you the brilliance of Yakko Warner's athletic ability.

I don't want to hear one word about toon physics, okay? Even with it, it still has to take a lot of practicing and precision to be able to not only jump that high, but to somersault as you're spiking the ball, and land perfectly on top of the net.

You can't change my mind.

After that comes the discus throw, with Dot taking the lead.

Regardless of how far it went, or toon physics, you can still appreciate how she's strong enough to throw something as heavy as a discus like it's a Frisbee.

And it looks like Yakko and Wakko agree, because we see them do THIS.

#animaniacs #yakko wakko and dot #yakko warner #wakko warner #dot warner #warner siblings #warner brothers #and the warner sister #warner sister #animaniacs reboot #animaniacs 2020 #the mime

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jbuffyangel · 3 years

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The Domino Falls: Arrow 1x12 Review (Vertigo)

It’s officially 1 year today since Arrow went off the air and I thought what better way to mark the moment than by chatting about the show we all love with a review!

We have begun the slow and steady climb to more Felicity Smoak content

and “Vertigo” is a monumentally HUGE moment in Oliver and Felicity’s relationship. One little meet up at Big Belly Burger is what tips the dominoes over for Oliver Queen.

Let’s dig in...

Olicity

Let’s get right to the good stuff. Of course, there’s other stuff that happened in this episode, but do we care? Only a little. Oliver is on the hunt for The Count – the man responsible for the Vertigo epidemic and Thea’s looming drug trial. The Count is in my Top 5 of best Arrow villains. Of course his first episode coincides with an Olicity milestone. That rat bastard worked the hardest for our ship.

The judge has decided to make an example out of Ms. Queen in hopes of deterring others from trying Vertigo. Seriously, does that ever work?

So, he chucked Thea’s plea agreement right out the window. Big Bro in The Hood is hoping to serve up a bigger fish – THE FISH – to help get his sister off the hook. Oliver is generally anti innocent people dying from illicit drugs, so there are unselfish reasons at play too.

No one knows the identity of The Count, so after roughing up the streets and getting nowhere, Oliver reaches out to Alexi Leonov. We met Leonov in 1x03, but for those who need a refresher - he leads the Starling City chapter of the Bratva. This is the first time Diggle meets Leonov, discovers Oliver speaks Russian, is a captain in the Russian mob, and can fake kill someone.

It was a big day for John.

Leonov sets up the meet with The Count and Oliver attempts to buy some Vertigo off him, sans mask and arrow. The cops show up and Oliver tries to run down The Count as he escapes, but is stabbed in the chest with two syringes full of Vertigo.

Never fear, Oliver has his magic herbs from Lian Yu which apparently can cure drug overdose. (Maybe share with the rest of the world?) Vertigo makes him momentarily murderous (more than usual) and he screams a lot.

THE POINT OF ALL THIS EXPOSITION IS ALL ROADS LEAD TO FELICITY SMOAK.

Diggle and Oliver think it would be wise to have someone analyze the Vertigo… for some reason. This leads our dynamic duo to Queen Consolidated and to our favorite blonde hacker.

Felicity rambles about Oliver’s haggard appearance (re: see drug overdose) and a cat being tased (she connects those disparate dots, I assure you). He offers yet another ridiculous lie and we embark on one of the funniest scenes in Arrow’s history.

Arrow struggled to find its footing for a long time, but “Vertigo” is the beginning of the writers settling on to solid ground. If you ever have to wonder why the show focused on Oliver, Diggle and Felicity as the core characters you only need to watch this scene for the answer.

The chemistry between all the actors is amazing. Arrow is not known for its humor (especially in Season 1), but between Emily Bett Rickard’s perfect delivery of another one of Felicity’s awkward and inadvertent sexual slip ups,

Stephen Amell’s inability to stay in character as he laughs right along with us,

and David Ramsey’s stone cold straight man reaction –

this entire scene is comedy gold.

I vividly remember watching it live, laughing my ass off, and wanting more of EVERYTHING these three have to offer. And that’s exactly what we’re going get.

“I ran out of sports bottles” reigned as Arrow’s funniest scene for a solid two years (until this episode), but it also marks the worst of Oliver’s terrible lies to Felicity. It’s so bad even Diggle has to remark on it in the elevator. Oliver’s lies are horrible, everyone knows Felicity doesn’t buy a word of it, and their need for her help is increasing with every day. Something has to change.

As we discussed in 1x11, Oliver is prone to distrust and very reticent to change his mind – ever. He’s been burned so many times in the past it’s difficult for him to view anyone through a trusting lens.

And yet, Oliver told his deepest and darkest secret to a man he’d only known for a few weeks. Yes, Diggle had soldier skills Oliver would find useful as a partner. He knew John could hold his own in the field, but it’s not just about his abilities. It was also about the person Diggle is. Oliver did his homework and realized he needed John to survive. There was a wellspring of humanity in John that Oliver wasn’t able to access inside himself. He was subconsciously reaching out for help - like a moth to a flame.

It is the same with Felicity. Yes, Oliver needs her abilities – perhaps even more than what Diggle has to offer. (It’s not like Oliver Queen can’t handle himself in the field). But he is also drawn to Felicity’s warmth, kindness, humor, compassion and openness. Oliver’s heart is encased in iron and welded shut. He doesn’t know how to open it back up. It’s been dark and alone for so long. And yet, Oliver returns again and again to this brightly shining light and why? Because he craves it.

Something has to change. We need that final push, the first domino to fall, so Oliver can make that final step and tell Felicity who he really is. Diggle was easier. He’d fought a war before. Oliver also knew about Andy’s death. Remember – Oliver brought Diggle onboard when he needed help with Deadshot. Manipulative? Yes, but it worked.

Felicity is trickier. I’m sure Oliver has done his research.

Well, yes that kind of research, but also into her background. There’s no dead family member requiring retribution. No war zone she’s recently returned from. She’s an MIT graduate with a penchant for hacking working at a global conglomerate as a wildly overqualified IT tech. The girl doesn’t have so much as a parking ticket. The leap to vigilantism would be rather big.

I also think a fair amount of his hesitancy to involve her in anything related to The Hood is the danger. Diggle can handle himself. Felicity is a different story. Oliver is constantly battling the need for Felicity’s help versus the risk he’s putting her at by asking for it. The lies are to protest Oliver’s secret identity, but also to shield Felicity from it.

Whether it is Oliver’s own distrustfulness, his inability to see an angle to reel Felicity in, his desire to protect her or all three – it doesn’t matter. He continues to lie to her. Oliver isn’t ready to make that big leap either.

Source: yet-i-remain-quiet

Until… Felicity asks to meet him at Big Belly Burger. Oliver waits for her, looking out the window on a rainy night, thinking of Yao Fei.

Oliver feared Yao Fei betrayed him and was really working for Fyers, but neither was true. He convinced Fyers of his loyalty by pretending to kill Oliver. (So that’s who Oliver learned it from!) Yao Fei wakes Oliver just as he rolls his “dead” body into the waterfall. He also slips Oliver a map with a location marked with the words “Survive.”

Oliver doubted his trust in Yao Fei, but in the end was shocked to find out he had it right all along. Yao Fei was exactly who Oliver thought he was – a good man. That final and literal push cemented Oliver’s belief in his friend and to trust his gut.

There will probably always be a debate as to when the writers began the shift towards Olicity. “We DiDn’T dEcIdE uNtIL sEaSoN 2,” is the standard story, but I’m a firm believer it began in Season 1 and often include this scene in my massive pile of evidence. The last scene in the episode either tees up the next or contains a lot of emotional significance. Felicity beings to carve out a lot of final scene time as the series progresses.

The last scene in “Vertigo” is romantically lit with rain drops shimmering on the window. Oliver and Felicity are meeting outside the office and ALONE. Soft instrumental music plays in the background. It feels more intimate than any scene they’ve shared before.

Source: andjustforthismoment

I still cannot get over Oliver “The Sex God” Queen waving at Felicity Smoak like a giddy school boy and then shaking his head over how completely uncool he looked. We watched this man leave a criminal suspended in the air with an arrow through his hand in the first scene and in the last he acts like a puppy. THE RANGE.

It’s clear Felicity is a little nervous as she exhales walking in. Is she nervous to be meeting with Oliver or nervous about what she has to say? Both. She tips her hand a bit by thanking Oliver for meeting her at Big Belly Burger. She did not want to have this discussion at the Queen mansion. (THE PLOT THICKENS).

It seems Oliver and Felicity are having similar conundrums about each other. Felicity is uncertain if she can trust Oliver and has been debating for weeks whether or not to tell him the full truth. SOUND FAMILIAR? Felicity has far more evidence of Oliver’s untrustworthiness. There’s no rambling this time. She lays out the cold hard facts which is Oliver Queen is a big, fat liar and she knows it. He knows it. They both know it. Felicity Smoak is nobody’s fool.

And yet, she trusts him. Even though Oliver has given her no reason to. Even though there are clearly things he’s not telling her. Even though Oliver has yet to show her the same trust. There is something Felicity sees in him which tells her Oliver is worthy of it. It is an unsubstantiated truth. Felicity is going with her gut and her gut says Oliver Queen is a good man.

This doesn’t stop her from asking him the simple question though. Felicity needs that little bit of reassurance before she makes the final leap.

At first, Oliver plays it off in his smarmy, smart ass and flippant way. It’s the Ollie Queen façade that always works with L*urel, Tommy, Lance, Moira and Thea.

It’s an act that’s never worked on Felicity. She sees through it now just like she’s always has. Her smile fades. Felicity breaks eye contact with Oliver and doesn’t hide her disappointment. She is tired of the games and lies. Felicity wants to talk to the real Oliver Queen. That’s the only man she will share this secret with.

All it takes is five seconds of Felicity’s disappointment for Oliver to drop the façade like a hot potato.

He even apologizes and promises Felicity he is worthy of her trust. Then, Felicity lowers the boom and hands him The List.

It is difficult to surprise Oliver Queen, but this one has him reeling. She hands the book to Oliver, the same book Robert gave him, but he hesitates taking it. He has no idea where this is going, so he defaults to his standard operating procedure and lies.

Oliver is not doing a stellar job covering his “my world is upside down” reaction, so I highly doubt Felicity believes him, but she lets it slide for now.

The more information she shares with Oliver the worse it gets. Felicity begins to fill in all the missing pieces to Walter’s disappearance and the guilt is pointing directly at Moira.

This is not the first time Oliver has reason to doubt his mother, but every time he’s able to reason away her involvement in anything nefarious. If he can’t do that on his own then Moira provides very plausible explanations (LIES), which allow Oliver to continuing looking at his family with a blind eye. But this? This is impossible to easily explain away. Particularly since WALTER was beginning to suspect his own wife.

Source: green-arrows-of-karamel

If The List cost Walter his life then Felicity is risking her own by showing it to anyone, particularly a Queen. She is literally putting her life in Oliver’s hands when she handed him that book. The first domino falls, but it’s not Oliver who pushes it over. It’s Felicity. She gives Oliver the truth when he’s given nothing but lies. Felicity trusts him absolutely when he’s done nothing to show he’s deserving of it. She risks everything while Oliver continues to hide everything.

Felicity shocks Oliver no differently than Yao Fei shocked him. We’ve been waiting all this time for Oliver to make that final step and in the end it is Felicity who gives their relationship the necessary push over the waterfall. It’s a cold awakening, but he can see things clearly now. She is like a flashlight illuminating all the answers clouded by his distrustfulness and hesitancy.

Felicity reveals so much of herself in this moment. First, she is willing to take risks if the cause is worth it. Giving Oliver that book took real courage. Second, the girl can keep a secret. She never said boo about anything related to Moira or Walter during Oliver’s little visits. Not even a hint! Three, Felicity Smoak sees clearly all the things Oliver is blind to.

This serves as an important lesson for Oliver. Felicity knows so much more than he ever gave her credit for. Most importantly, his gut was right about her and he was wrong to ever question it. Two mistakes he will never make again.

And now everything will change.

Thea and Moira

I’m not gonna sugar coat this for you guys. I was one hundred percent okay with Thea going to jail. Season 1 Thea is a pain in the ass. A couple episodes with her sitting in the slammer would be a welcomed break from the teenage ‘tude.

L*urel and Lance work out a sweetheart deal for Thea after the judge basically said he would throw the book at her. Thea will serve 500 hours of community service under the watchful gaze of L*urel Lance at CRNI. And Thea flat out refuses.

Now, typically I am a fan of anyone who tells L*urel Lance to go screw herself, but even this was too much for me. Thea wants to go to jail to stick it to her mother because she’s still convinced Moira cheated on Walter.

She didn’t cheat on Walter, Thea! Your mom just kidnapped him. So it’s fine.

Oliver decides to drop the Robert “I’m not the man you think I am” Queen bomb on Thea and tells her their father was a big hoe. Thea refuses to believe him and Moira is ticked because Oliver told the truth. Queens don’t do that EVER.

Moira: He loved you. No matter his faults. He loved you.

Thea wants to know why Moira took all the punishment for Robert’s sins and her answer is very simple. She was trying to protect Thea’s memory of her father. Moira Queen is as shady as they come, but her desire to protect her children is always the driving force of any decisions she makes – good, bad and the ugly.

Moira: One day I hope you’re lucky enough to have a daughter and then you’ll know why.

This is the essence of motherhood. We will serve ourselves up on a platter and take the brunt of their hurt and anger if we believe it protect or help our children in the long run. Right or wrong - it’s just the gig.

Source: queensarrow.

L*urel and Lance

L*urel and Detective Lance are really Thea’s only hope of avoiding significant jail time and, despite their history, Oliver has no problem groveling at their feet if it means protecting his sister. Luckily for Oliver, this week L*urel likes him, so she’s willing to do Thea a favor.

But her reason for wanting to help Thea turns out have very little to do with Oliver. It’s about Sara. When L*urel looks at Thea she sees all the wild abandon of Sara with all the red flags.

L*urel: For so long you and I have blamed Oliver for Sara's death, but Sara is to blame too.

Detective Lance isn’t too keen on helping Oliver or Thea, but L*urel calls out her father on his hypocrisy. He had no qualms about bailing Sara out after she shop lifted. The youngest Lance daughter seemed to get herself in to trouble long before she ever stepped onto the Queen’s Gambit and her father always helped her avoid the consequences of her actions. Until those consequences finally caught up with her.

This is the first time L*urel lays any blame at Sara’s feet. I find it wildly disturbing whenever I agree with L*urel, but damn it she has this one right. Oliver wasn’t the only one who cheated. Oliver wasn’t the only one who lied. Oliver wasn’t the only one who was selfish. Sara was all of those things too. Just because she paid for those mistakes with her life doesn’t erase the choices she made and the pain she caused. If someone held Sara responsible without destroying her life, like L*urel is trying to do with Thea just maybe she would have never gotten on the boat. Maybe.

The game of “What if?” is a torturous one. It never gives any definitive answers. But Detective Lance refusing to help Thea to stick it to Oliver isn’t fair. L*urel is right. Sure, it may hurt Oliver, but it won’t bring Sara back.

More importantly, it doesn’t hold Sara responsible in any way. Detective Lance is treating Sara the same in death as he did in life. She wasn’t a saint anymore than Thea is – no matter how much Lance romanticizes his memory of his daughter. L*urel and her father don’t resolve the Sara issue, but Lance helping Thea is an important step towards his acknowledgement of the truth and putting some of the blame where it belongs.

Stray Thoughts

Oliver is shirtless and handcuffed in the bunker is an absolutely wasted opportunity for an Olicity sex scene. Pretty sure I read a fic that started like it though. Source: @olivergifs

Bratva Oliver is cold, calculating and stylish. I don’t know what it is about that jacket you guys. It doesn’t things to me.

I say this as a person who was very anti murder throughout the show, but sometimes it’s great to watch Oliver do a little violence.

“Whoever you fear, fear me more!” As vigilante lines go this was a damn good one.

“I’m not the one going to prison.” Give it time, Moira. Give it time.

McKenna Hall makes her first episode appearance as the rotation of female guest stars continues while show desperately searches for a love interest Stephen has chemistry because it ain’t Katie Cassidy. (Psst! You found THE ONE already!!! Call off the search!)

Just for you multifandom folks out there McKenna is also Qetsiyah on The Vampire Diaries.

Why doesn’t Oliver give a sketch to the police of The Count? That could be helpful.

“I don’t need the bow.” Yeah, but you need to walk straight!

Musings of the Kiddo

Kiddo: How many times does he do this to her?

Me: Lie? A lot. She was very patient with him.

Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me.

If you’d like to support the blog, please buy me a cup of tea!

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plutoswrath · 4 years

Text

The blessing in evil: harsh aspects

I decided to make this post, since I get a lot of messages of people being frustrated in some way or another with their challenging aspects. Astrology is neutral at its core and will forever consist of the positive and the genative, both live together in unison and always will. I think it goes without saying, that difficult aspects have (of course) their positive sides to them, and can be just as much of a blessing as naturally positive aspects: but how to deal with them and how to look at the challenge harsh aspects provide?

I decided to list the aspects I get asked about the most, as well as a few of my own selection that I’ve have seen people in real life struggle with a lot. Keep in mind, that the specific interpretation of the aspects can differ depending on the planets, signs and houses involved. This is a general post about them, but I’ll try to go as much as in depth as possible. Some of those aspects listed are still debatable in their interpretation, it seems to me.

The Opposition

This aspect has an orb allowance from approximately 10°, it is formed by two planets that are seperated by ca. 180°. The Opposition is self explaining, somehow. It’s the other side of the coin, two siblings starring at each other, so similar, yet unbelievably different and none tries to give in to the other. The cold sholder they think another rightfully deserves. Imagine it as two quirling siblings, that stand in front of their parent (you), explaining and justifying why they are in the right. You on the other hand have to find a middle ground and make your children understand that both of them are right and both of them are wrong. While every aspect is somehow in a way about balance and power dynamics as well as structures, this one is especially about balance and a dynamic balance only. Oppositions force you into extremes easily. One time you handle exactly like one energy, neglecting the other, then you go after the other energy, leaving the first energy out in order to satisfy both needs. This can ultimately lead to stagnation, being irritated to the point that you can go after any energy, identifying with both and yet with none. Key message behind the Opposition: Balance is dynamic, an never ending ungoing process, a status we have to create and that won’t last forever, once we realized our problem or thought about a solution. Both energies are right and need each other in order to find harmony, they ultimately have been born somehow on common ground, it’s a beautiful symbiosis, that lets you unravel and discover lifes lesson of regenerating the self, self healing and how to connect two dots to create the full picture (imagine it like coloring by numbers!). The Opposition is often about getting to know what one wants and needs, it’s undeniably equally important for one to figure it out in order to fully focus on ones destiny or at least to fully visualize all the opportunities and chances in ones life path. More than often, the Opposition takes time to figure out even when the answer seems to be clear and obvious - don’t pressure yourself, take your time and be kind.

The Square

The Square is an aspect that is created by a difference of 90° with an orb allowance of 7.5 degrees. The Square is different compared to the Opposition, here the energies seem to not even bloom from the same family or at least have little similarities. Now, the square is usually two different ideologies clashing, they create a melting pot of frustration and even agression, where the Square sits the native will find themself unconsciously falling back into difficult behavior, thoughts and situations. The square is about questioning what energy is rightfully here, demanding to be pleased and lived out and which is wrong. Of course, none of them is wrong, but really, the native might ask themself: how can they ever work together? Extreme neglect and totalities might be a consequence, wanting the problem to ‘vanish’ already, pleading for growth. It’s really about appreciating the total differences and using them for the best. The individual might feel like they can’t fully chose one ‘option’, but this constant ‘figuring out’ how to channel their energies and when to rely to them, as well as to accept them as strong and reliable forces, keeps the individual active and on the go. They are forced to be quick and clever in a way, to explore people and the self, to assert the self and to overcome an inner blockage. This blockage makes you either disarm yourself - unable to move on and to let yourself be washed away by the rough and wild sea - or you become the boat that wisely reads the sky and water and moves forward without sinking and so is able to see the wild unknown places that the world has to offer. Key message behind the Square: Master of the forces that seem to hold you in a tight grip, seeing the benefit in even the worst and constantly developing the self and setting an example as the master of self understanding and development.

The Inconjunction or Quincunx

The Inconjunction is an aspect of 150° and has an orb allowance of 2 degrees. This aspect feels unable to ‘balance out’ or to find common grounds, since modality and element are both not compatible. More often the Inconjunction can lead to acceptance. We don’t need to force desires and wishes together only for the sake of apparent constant harmony. Both these energies have their own area, both need to live their energies out and have the right to do so. In a negative way, an individual might develop an unhealthy behaviorism in order to satisfy both needs. When being true and honest with the self, the native will think about neutral/benefitting/healthy ways of secluding both areas of the planets energies and needs in their life. Key message behind the Inconjunction: Acceptance first, be honest with yourself and let go of the constant need to create a harmony that can not be reached. Be greatful for the differences and allow yourself find ways to enjoy both with a good will, heart and gratitude. Adjustment will come naturally then.

The Semi-Square

It is an aspect of 45° with an orb allowance of ca. 2 degrees. The Semi-Square is a harsh aspect that manifests as an emotional/inner blockage and inner pain that will manifest subconsciously as outer problems that reoccur, similar in its outcomes and how they happen. The Semi-Square can easily lead to losing the self, losing faith in the self or self-pity but whilst the native struggles with inner blockage and adjusting, the external events will put them in the position to actively take action: one can not not ignore the problem inside the self when it’s presented right in front of them, however if you choose to keep on hanging on to your frustration and desires, if you keep on pushing it aside, wanting to deal with it later or purely neglecting lifes offers for growth one might find themself left behind at times. Another problem might be a lack of discipline, holding on to old, bad behavior or attitude. Key message behind the Semi-Square: Don’t ignore your inner pain, even if it seems small at first. Be open and observant and willing to deal with problems. It’s normal that adjustment will take time, don’t decide where’s the limit when it comes to growth. Be open and content about changes to expand your mind, challenges by life that test you. Be persitant.

The Sesquiquadrate

The aspect in a degree of 135 with an orb allowance of 2-3. This is about holding the self accountable for our actions and problems, to not ignore them. It’s about inner control and to accept aid. The energies of the Sesquiquadrate are subtle, sometimes not noticed by the native. Usually it’s when we want to break free of negativity/a problem but know for a better that we are bound to something holding us back, hence losing our courage. It offers creativity, since this aspect is usually easier mastered by strong positive aspects in the natal chart, that strengthen your decisions and actions. If this challenging aspect is noticed, the feelings of being unable to do anything leads easily to ignoring the problem. Now, this is the point, that’ll potentially make it bigger emotional baggage than it has been before. There is a desire to act and it involves the self, to combine to sides inside of you, to stimulate two sides that have strong expectations. To break boundaries by combining them. Key message behind the Sesquiquadrate: Reflect on the self and acknowledge your flaws and problems. Be active about them, don’t pile emotional baggage up. Be open for guidance and be open to think constructively. Seek out outer guidance/help/opinions, it’s not a shame, at best they will only heighten your intuiton. Embrace oppositions.

#ah i did it #i was active and made a post #see you in six months!!!!#ahhhhhhhh ((this is bad i lack motivation eghh))#own #aspects #negative aspects #astrology #zodiac #opposition #square #inconjunction #quincunx #semi-square #sesquiquadrate #hard aspects #harsh aspects

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aceofshitposts · 3 years

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I saw that you like CATS the musical. What are your thoughts on the movie?

AAAAH AHHAHA oh man oh boy y'all should BUCKLE IN cuz it's a ride

my simple thoughts? it's entertaining if only because it butchered the stage show so badly in an attempt to idk modernize it? Well, modernization is one part of it I think. The other part I'll go into below lol. I don't necessarily hate some of the more modern renditions of the songs (mostly the ensemble sets like Jellicle Song for Jellicle Cats) but then others are just... so poorly done it's insulting.

I've said this at the end of this whole rant too but I'm gonna put it up here in case people don't (justifiably) wanna see me go on and on about it:

The movie wasn't made for fans of the musical. It was made to make money and I believe they choose, at least partially, to do that through making it the weirdest and worst possible adaptation they could so that people would want to go see the train wreck. Which, really, worked! It was all people could talk about for a good while so like... Goal achieved, I guess.

A MUCH MORE COMPREHENSIVE ANALYSIS UNDER THE CUT cuz i don't wanna. flood your dash with... this

ALRIGHT SO. Most of my friends know I'm actually a huge fan of new adaptations of things. I love remakes (provided the people making it are coming at it with some form of heart and not just... cash grabbing which is more often the case) I love seeing other peoples interpretations of characters, or changing settings. It's one of the reasons I like American comics so much, getting to see different writers takes is fascinating.

I think musical movies can be wonderful ways to introduce people to a stage show that might have been unavailable to them otherwise! Chicago, for example, is one of the BEST musical to movie adaptations in my opinion. It kept the heart of the show, it's funny and the song numbers are done really well.

There are of course other famous examples, such as Grease or Bye Bye Birdie. Hairspray was also a wonderful take. These are simply off the top of my head, there are of course more.

CATS in particular has a history. If you go through my CATS tag you may see a few posts from @catsnonreplica which posts photos from non broadway productions of CATS! It's a fascinating read and I love, love, love looking at the other interpretations of the characters! CATS is a musical full of fun and wonderful characters if you take the time to see past the ridiculousness haha and the Korean and Japanese runs of CATS especially have some of my favourites.

How does this relate to the movie, I hear you say well. As you might has noticed the movie's interpretations of the characters is........ lackluster at best and downright uncanny valley at best.

CATS is, at its core, a ridiculous thing. I will fully admit that! But it's fun, it's entertaining and if you pay a little attention you can actually get the plot. (Honestly I don't understand when people complain it has no plot but that's a whole other rant for another day)

The movie was... obsessed with this idea of like... semi realism? Like obviously, as a fan, I think they should have leaned into the over the top character designs but instead we got...w ell:

Bombalurina:

Demeter left and Bomba right. Demeter was actually cut! From the movie which is. upsetting lmao.

Macavity is one of the worst offenders for me:

Macavity was... I wish I could know what the hell they were thinking there cuz it's even in his song? Ginger cat??? THAT IS NOT... A GINGER CAT...... but I digress. I would show more examples but I think you get the point.

So. We've butchered the characters appearances. Okay that's fine but what about their personalities?

ALSO BUTCHERED.

There's... there's a lot to unpack here. Just for context: the Jellicle Ball happens once a year and the Jellicle leader chooses a single cat to be reborn into a new life. In the stage play all the cats who are nominated for this honour are on the older side (Jenny-Any-Dots, Bustopher Jones, Skimbleshanks, Gus The Theatre Cat, and eventually Grizzabella) AND are always nominated by another cat. Not themself, unlike the movie where they all seem to nominate themselves.

Jenny-Any-Dots went from a doting grandmother figure who's celebrated for her selfless volunteering and tireless work into a conceited, vain younger cat who is obsessed with fame.

It's an incredibly strange dichotomy. I don't doubt some of it isn't the result of the uh people playing the characters honestly. I do think some of them did the best they could! I don't really blame Jason Derulo, for example, for Tugger. And honestly, Tugger was probably closest to his stage version (while being a trouble maker, he's shown to show Deuteronomy an immense amount of respect)

Speaking of Tugger! This will bring us to one of the biggest grievances with the movie and that is how they handled Mr Mistoffelees.

So... Ugh. So. We have Victoria as the pov character, which imo is like whatever in the grand scheme of things, and then we have Misto who they have decided will be get live interest cuz... Of course. Misto is shown throughout the musical to be awkward, unsure of himself and well. Really, kinda incompetent. Which is Wild cuz in the stage show he might be aloof but he's fairly confident in his powers.

So, Old Deuts gets kidnapped. In the stage show Tugger is the one to bring Misto forward! It's really quite sweet, imo, and I'm showing myself as a Tuggoffelees shipper here, but again Tugger is previously shown to be pretty conceited but then here he is boosting and hyping up Misto to bring Deuteronomy back. My friends and I have lovingly dubbed this the boyfriend hype song.

SOMEHOW. The movie manages to make this, easily, the MOST BORING number in the whole thing. Which, again, WILD. Misto awkwardly stumbles through his whole song, which again is... Boasting of his supreme magical powers which movie Misto clearly. Does not have or believe to have. The song, to me, feels super awkward and unnecessarily drawn out in the movie which sucks cuz it's one of my favourites in the show.

The declawing (heh) of Mr Mistoffelees actually reminds me strongly of how they changed Gaston in the live action Beauty and the Beast movie. He's gone from a beloved figure in the animated movie to someone so disliked in the town that Le Fou has to pay people off to say nice things about him. It's just. Wild character choices were made!!

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat is probably my favourite in movie non ensemble number. It feels the most... Genuine? Compared to the other nomination songs.

Other problems include but are not limited to:

The inconsistent size scale of the CATS which throws me off constantly.

The weirdly overt sexual overtones added to MANY of the songs (Jenny and Bustopher being the worst)

This is just a personal gripe and opinion but I don't like that they used the UK version of Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer. The American version is both better known and tbh way more fun. Teazer's giggle? Adds ten years to my life every time.

Victoria's added solo song, Beautiful Ghosts, while I like the song as a song it doesn't fit the style of message of the musical. In the movie she's singing directly to Grizzabella who's being an outcast for years that she should be grateful she even has memories of being part of the tribe?? What?? But I know they had to add an original song to be able to be nominated for awards in like the Grammys n shit (which is why all musical movies will have an original song, fun fact!!) kinda funny they went to the effort though considering........... I don't think anyone could have genuinely believed CATS 2019 was gonna win anything but golden rhaspberries.

Movie Mr Mistoffelees has made repeated appearances as my sleep paralysis demon

The various cut characters, shout outs to Jemima, Demeter and Jellylorum especially

Bombalurina being a henchman to Macavity rubs me the wrong way

God I've written... So much. You probably get it by now haha. Like I said at the beginning, I try to go into any adaptation with an open mind but... Let's be honest, this movie wasn't marketed to people who are fans of the musical.

It was marketed, and made, to make money. And they choose to do that through, I think, intentionally making the worst possible version ever. Bad press is still press and the more outrageous people said the movie was the more people wanted to go see exactly what kind of train wreck it was.

Which is a disservice to the stage show, honestly, and all the people who've worked on it over the years.

But what can we do, right?

And besides all that, I do... Still own the movie version and I do still rewatch it on occasion. It is entertaining even if it's in a train wreck kind of way. I usually end up watching the 1998 version, then 2019 and then various tour runs that are on YouTube. (I highly recommend the 2016 tour, it's very good)

So in conclusion. It's fun (?) to watch. I enjoy picking things apart and doing analysis (if you couldn't tell!) so like... I don't hate it?

It did what it set out to do, I guess, and I can't fault it for that but. It's not a fair metre with which to judge the stage show imo. But I know it's not everyone's cup of tea, haha.

Jazz hands. I'm more than happy to elaborate or just chat about CATS if anyone wants! I grew up listening to the Broadway CD since I was a toddler so it's been! A very long standing obsession haha. Probably the only other thing on par with CATS is my obsession with Jurassic Park which I've also been a fan of since I was 3 (but that's a whole story in and of itself)

#astrix thoughts #cats the musical #Thanks for the opportunity to talk about one of my hyperfixations anon!#And to anyone who reads this whole mess lmao

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