Pumpkin Eater
Suptober Prompt: Days 2 & 3 - Pumpkin Patch, Inspired | Pumpkin Eater | 1.4K | M | Read on Ao3 (or below cut)
It's no news that Sam Winchester hates Halloween, so when a hunt leaves them caked in wet, stringy squash guts, whilst standing in the remains of what used to be a glorious patch of pumpkins, he's reasonably upset. So what if Dean feels a little inspired to egg him on? Maybe he shouldn't make it so easy…
“I really hate Halloween…” Sam groaned, faced scrunched up in disgust as he painstakingly peeled pumpkin guts off of himself.
He took a whiff of his flannel, soiled and freshly wet, and gagged, before sliding the garment off his shoulders.
“What,” Dean grinned, similarly covered, but not as moody as his little brother, “bathing in the insides of the great pumpkin king not your kind of party?”
Sam snorted and rolled his eyes. “Funny, Dean.”
“I dunno, I think we have enough left of this guy to make a couple of pies. What do you think, Cas?”
Cas narrowed his eyes, glancing around the pumpkin patch they desecrated for their hunt, which had only concluded moments ago, and was, ultimately, the reason they all decided to .
The monster they had been fighting, go figure, was ‘haunting’ the victim’s farm, and bringing the resident jack-o-lanterns to life–as if puppets weren’t already terrifying without being hordes of man eating gourds–which in turn terrorized the locals, making this your run of the mill Halloween Town–yes, Dean made that joke, no, nobody thought it was funny (except him, of course).
Just as Dean had the pleasure of putting the band Smashing Pumpkins to shame, by doing just that; except these were angry, possessed pumpkins, who, much to Dean’s chagrin, could care less about the music scene.
“Maybe take some of the seeds home, roast ‘em.” He suggested with an easy smile.
“I don’t think it’s wise to use these pumpkins for baking, Dean.” Cas replied, regarding Dean curiously.
Dean opened his mouth to retort, but Sam cut off the reply.
“If I hear someone say the word pumpkin, or anything related to what just happened here, again, I swear to god I will end you.”
“You just said it though.”
Sam snapped a glare over at his brother, before storming off with a muttered, “I’ll go tell the owners the place is safe now,” leaving Dean and Cas standing in the field littered with the corpses of pumpkins.
“Well isn’t he just awfully cheery today,” Dean said sarcastically with a snort, watching his brother leave.
Once Sam was out of sight, he turned back to the carnage, and shook his head, letting out a disappointed sigh. “Damn, if only we didn’t smash all of them though. Could’ve taken a couple pumpkins home with us. Jack would’ve loved to carve them.”
Cas smiled and walked over to Dean, reaching up to pick some guts and seeds from his hair. “That would be nice, yes. How very thoughtful of you, Dean.”
Dean chuckled, brushing some chunks off the angel’s trench coat. “Naw, just thinking about what Sammy and I used to do, y’know, when it was just the two of us slumming it in motels, waiting for dad to come back.”
“Sam seems to have a very strong hatred for Halloween…”
Dean rolled his eyes, wiping off his machete with the bottom of his shirt. “He didn’t always. He used to love it. We even went trick-or-treating around the motel rooms. Dad woulda killed us, but it was worth the smile on that kid’s face. Guess I was inspired.”
“Well, I think you’re right, Dean. Jack would love to do all that, regardless of Sam’s opinion. And maybe not from this one, but I’m sure we can find another pumpkin patch, perhaps closer to the bunker, and take them there instead.”
Cas looked around once more at the sad, smattered remains of this pumpkin patch, and let out a sigh himself. “Though hopefully we don’t have to destroy that one too.”
“I might not share the same reservations as Sam, Cas, but if we had to go through this again, I think I’d start hating Halloween too.”
The two of them started walking back, side by side along the path, Dean grimacing at the squelching of pumpkin beneath their boots.
“It really is a friggin shame that all the pumpkins ended up being collateral damage.”
Castiel hummed, frowning down at the aftermath, at what had become of the poor man’s farm.
“But it’s monster free now, so.” Dean shrugged, and Cas turned his attention toward the hunter, the small smile returning to his face.
“And that he, and the townspeople, are now safe.”
Dean beamed back at Castiel, green eyes twinkling with mirth. “Yeah, ‘course, Cas. That too.”
When they made their way back to the farmhouse, Sam was waiting for them out front, standing on the porch with his arms crossed, looking ever the soggy sourpuss, the bitchface still prominent on his face.
“Hope you didn’t talk to the guy lookin’ like that Sammy, like someone pissed in your wheaties.”
“Whatever, Dean. I just want to get home and take a shower. It’s going to take forever to get this stuff out, let alone the smell.”
“You mean to tell me you don’t want to smell like a yankee candle? Not a pumpkin spice bitch, Sammy?” Dean smirked, his cocky expression only growing at the umpteenth glare Sam sent him that afternoon, and the—albeit gentle—nudge to his shoulder Cas gave from beside him, which was meant to be chastising.
“I hate you.” His brother muttered, fleeing into the impala.
Dean laughed, turning to Cas with a wink. The angel only rolled his eyes.
“You shouldn’t tease him so much.”
“Aw, come on man, ‘m only having a little fun!”
“Yes, well, now he’s pissed off at you whilst in the car covered in pumpkin, getting it all over the upholstery.” Castiel said pointedly, looking smug now, especially as the color drained from Dean’s face and his laughter stopped.
“Fuckin’ hell Sammy, I’ll kill you if you do anything to Baby!” Dean snapped, hurrying after his brother.
Cas chuckled and followed closely after, at his own measly pace. When he got to the impala, the Winchester brothers were arguing, as they do. He slipped into the backseat, quietly amused by their antics, though, technically, this time he was at fault, having instigated it…but that was not of import.
“We’re all covered in it Dean! What do you want me to do, sit on the roof?”
Sam’s nostrils flared at his brother’s contemplative look, “Dean, I’m not doing that!”
“Well-“
“No, Dean-“
“You suggested-“
“I said no, Dean!”
“And I’m just saying-“
“I don’t want to hear it.”
Dean threw his hands up placatingly, and turned the impala on, grinning as she purred to life.
“Just don’t rub it in. All the gunk.” He said as an afterthought, earning a huff from Sam.
He wasn’t going to stop being in a pissy mood anytime soon, not that Dean was really helping matters either.
“We should probably shower too, Dean, after Sam does. It does get rather unpleasant after a while.”
Dean met Cas’ eyes in the rearview mirror and smirked. “Sure thing, sweetheart.”
Cas looked back with a fond smile, only interrupted by Sam’s groan.
“At least wait until I’m gone, please.”
“What, are you homophobic now too, Sammy? Along with being allergic to anything Halloween?” Dean’s tone was teasing, and it got the desired reaction out of Sam.
Was he purposely poking the bear as much as he could? Absolutely hell yes, he was, and loving every minute of it. Sam was his baby brother after all; he made it easy.
“Ugh, dude, our entire lives are Halloween. It’s Halloween everyday for us. Pardon me if I’m a little sick of it by now.”
Sam shook his head. “And I can’t decide if the unresolved sexual tension was worse, or the resolved sexual tension is, seeing as I’ve had to witness, and experience, both firsthand!”
“Don’t hate the player, Samantha.” Dean joked, and Sam grimaced.
“We all know what ‘showering’ really means to you, Dean. Walking in on you is literally the worst. Talk about a jump scare.”
Dean laughed. “Just getting in the spirit, right Cas?”
“It appears we’re only aiding in Sam’s distaste of Halloween, though, Sam, I assure you, we don’t only have sex during the spooky season.”
“Yeah, hear that Sam? We ‘don’t only have sex during the spooky season’.” Dean parroted, shoulders shaking with laughter.
Sam groaned again, and buried his red face in his hands. “I take it all back. I’d rather be back in the pumpkin patch fighting an army of squash than having this conversation.”
Dean grinned. “Happy Halloween.”
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