#my random thoughts about destiel

[youchangedmedestiel]

You know what? Dean deserved to be fucked hard and raised from perdition.

#destiel #deancas #dean winchester #castiel #misha collins #truths have been spoken #cr8 #crossroads8 #expecting to wake up tomorrow morning on destiel trending #I'm counting on you guys #don't disappoint me #my random thoughts about destiel

[hells-plaid-angel]

In theory, if Cas ever did realise he was in love with Dean pre-deal with The Empty and actually decided to shoot his shot, I’d imagine a string of hilarity and miscommunication would ensue. There’s no way Cas would try to flirt with Dean if he thought it’d be received badly, but every now and again, Dean gives him just enough hope he thinks maybe it’s possible Dean likes him back. 

Say Cas shows up unexpectedly and Dean’s doing their movie night alone since Cas was away,  on some plot-relevant side quest. Cas arrives back unannounced because it’s movie night and what he’s doing can wait a day. Dean’s too thick to realise Cas has come back for him, and royally puts his foot in his mouth by asking why Cas is there, making the angel feel like he shouldn’t be because the course of true love never did run smoothly and when given the opportunity Dean will screw himself over when it comes to affection. 

Cas isn’t sure where they stand and wonders if he should stay and watch the film or leave. After awkwardly standing beside Dean’s armchair, watching the screen for longer than what would be deemed socially acceptable, Dean lets out a huff and says, ‘Just sit down,’ meaning, of course, for Cas to sit beside him in what Dean’s deemed ‘Cas armchair’. Cas takes Dean’s words literally and plonks down on the arm of Dean’s chair, smacking their shoulders together and settling in. 

The thing is, Dean lets him. He might grumble, but he doesn’t get Cas to move. He’s had a long night, having also returned from a hunt hours before and he’s beat. Before Cas knows it, Dean’s face is smooshed up against his shoulder and he’s open-mouthed snoring. Cas still thinks he’s the most beautiful human he’s ever seen and is in awe because Dean’s being vulnerable with him. He knows the man has trouble sleeping, plagued by dreams of Hell and hunts. Cas knows Dean doesn’t sleep with just anyone, even when he has casual sex, he rarely stays long after the act, so Cas looks down at the sleeping man and for the first time he thinks, ‘maybe’. Maybe Dean likes him back. He has no idea what to do with that possibility. He sits there quietly for the rest of the night because Dean’s an angry sleeper (like a bear) and Cas isn’t going to wake him up. 

He decides to tread lightly and toy with the idea of trying to flirt with Dean, without overtly flirting with Dean. He has no idea how to do this. After all his years on earth, there are still a lot of things that confuse him. While he and Dean are on a hunt sometime later, they pull over to a gas station. When Dean’s paying Cas mindlessly flips through the magazine stumbling on some shitty Cosmopolitan article about romance and flirting. They mention one way to show you are interested in someone is by showing curiosity in their likes and dislikes. 

So for the rest of the journey, Cas becomes almost insufferable with questions. He knows Dean’s top 13 favourite Led Zeppelin songs, but is Led Zeppelin Dean’s favourite band? What are Dean’s top 13 favourite bands? What is Dean’s favourite number? Does he have a favourite colour? Why is that his favourite colour? He rattles off questions for the entirety of their 14-hour trip cross country and Dean is confused as hell but decides to humour Cas because he does love talking about bands and movies, plus it’s not like anyone’s ever taken so much of an interest in him. 

Sometime towards the end of the trip, Dean realises he has no clue what Cas’ favourite anything is- do angels even have favourites? Wasn’t that meant to be the whole thing  about angels? All men are created equal and all that. Still, Dean asks. For the most part, Cas doesn’t have answers. He’s not sure who his favourite band is, though he can hesitantly say a few songs he likes better than others. It’s like they discover his favourite things together, unearthing them. Cas says with conviction his favourite colour is green and when Dean asks why he simply says, ‘Because it reminds me of you,’ and moves on. Dean goes silent for a long time after that but Cas is still left thinking that maybe Dean could love him. After all, he showed interest in Cas’ likes and dislikes as the magazine suggested. 

Something Cas learned from Dean’s movies was that humans showed affection through nicknames, strange terms of endearment that reminded them of sugary foods or woodland animals. Dean reminded Cas of neither, so he was unsure what kind of word to use to show his affection. Dean shortened his name. Perhaps this was his way of using a term of endearment, maybe Cas had missed some sign and should have given Dean a nickname of his own.  In the end, he settles for something in his mother tongue, because he’s better at expressing himself in Enochian. 

He uses a word for Dean which is both very intense and oddly specific, something that translates roughly to ‘Evergreen lover, formed of star ash’. Like a golden retriever, after having the stilted cacophony of consonants and vowels thrown in his direction for long enough Dean simply shrugs his shoulders and answers to the name. I’m talking a name that trembles like a sub-bass and causes stray dogs to howl and Dean just looks up of a morning from his bowl of Fruit Loops and goes, ‘oh yeah that’s me. Mornin’ Sunshine’. Bonus points if others around him know exactly what the name means, other angels, demons, maybe even Sam when he gets curious and looks through the bunker’s archives for an Enochian Dictionary. 

After all this, Cas is no closer to working out if Dean harbours affection towards him or not. So after some exasperated brainstorming, Cas decides to meet Dean where he’s at and attempts to express affection the way he knows Dean does. He cooks Dean’s breakfast and makes his coffee every morning because Dean expresses his love through security, caring for others and he especially loves food. It should be noted the bacon is burnt, the egg is raw and the coffee tastes like dishwater, but each morning Dean gives Cas a goofy, lopsided grin and thanks him. He’s grateful, Cas realises but he still has no idea if Dean’s in love with him. 

With his one last-ditch effort, Cas decides to try physical touch. Dean’s a tactile creature. He loves touch. So Cas tries to give it to him. He rests his hand on his shoulder or his side as he walks past Dean. If they are parting ways Cas pulls Dean into a hug. He’s stunned at first, but he lets it happen and even gets used to it after a while, so Cas gets more brazen. He wraps his foot around Dean’s ankle when they sit together at the map table. He pushes his palm into Dean’s when they’re sitting alone in their armchairs for movie night and that’s what finally pushes Dean over the edge. 

“Look man, I know you’re not human and you don’t get how stuff works but you can’t do junk like that. It’ll give people the wrong idea,” Dean would warn because his self-loathing, self-deprecating, still very closeted self would never in a million years dare to let himself think Cas knows what he’s doing.

“And what is the wrong idea?” Cas would ask. 

“You know, dude. That you like me. More than a friend like me,” Dean would explain and Cas would give him the most world-wearied, withering look and  sigh, “That is very much the idea I’ve been trying to get across,” He’d explain. 

And Dean would need about an hour for his brain to stop short-circuiting, long enough for him to reply, 

“Oh.” 

#destiel #Destiel fanfic #deancas #dean #dean winchester #cas #castiel #destiel drabble #spn #supernatural #my writing #destiel meta #destiel flash fiction #random thoughts #dean and cas #dean x cas #look a while ago I wrote a post #about Dean flirting with Cas #I thought it was about time #I made a post about Cas flirting with Dean

[butch--dean]

If destiel and deancas are four different people. I don’t think I know deancas I’m a destiel girlie all the way down

#it’s probably bc I left the random when deancas became a thing and returned in December of 2022? #fandom* #or maybe my golden age circles were just destiel circles #anyway. much to think about (<-figured these thoughts would be annoying on the og post)

[charliewrites99]

Me describing characters from Supernatural without ever watching it, based on what I could put together from random tumblr posts

Dean Winchester:

older brother

bi and the closet is glass

psycho-sexual relationship with his car

has a doctor kink

divorced married divorced married widowed by an angel

DADDY ISSUES

don't do this cas

was in hell at one point

shoulder hand print

red-blooded all american hunter manwhore

Sam Winchester:

younger brother

flannel

straight representation (except Gabriel I guess)

Third wheel

dropped out of uni

was engaged to a blond woman (RIP)

a literal walking death sentence to anyone who kisses him

party city wig

was possesed???

the one with common sense???

Castiel:

gay angel

world's saddest eyes

wet soggy orphan beagle

victim of the trench coat epidemic

powerful, but idk about where he lands on the scale

was brainwashed???

the daddy-est of issues (is his father god?)

YOU CHANGED ME DEAN

fish out of water

ditched heaven for the beauty of humanity (Dean's dick)

Jack Supernatural:

destiel child

may or may not be a new god

something celestial

floppy sad boi hair

Gabriel:

just here to have fun do drugs and flirt

trauma

Loki?

Sam's Man Crush Monday

had his lips sewn together at one point

is he dead-dead? or just dead to the writers?

Daddy Winchester:

did not know what he looked like until I went to google the pictures

the worst person to ever exist despite having god and the devil on this show

left the sons the trauma factory that is the family hunting business which killed their mom

doesn't know what hugging looks like probably

Various female-looking objects:

dead girlfriends

beards

that one redhead that called Dean a pussy for not knowing what fifth base is (she seems fun)

another redhead that played Poppy in The Magicians and almost killed Quentin (that I for some reason thought was from Doctor Who)

evil angel girlboss??

This was my contribution for this years November 5th celebration

#spn #supernatural #destiel #castiel #dean winchester #sam winchester #november 5th #nov 5th

[randomishnickname]

Must-read Destiel fics - my superduper Nov. 5th rec list

Three years ago, on the blessed day of November 5th, 2020, I had:

never seen an episode of SPN,

only had a vague inkling of what the two pale coconuts were on about,

and I hee-heed and ha-had with the rest of Tumblr about the love confession scene and the Internet errupting in an unparalleled craze

At first I thought, that's it.

Then ... I got curious. I watched some YouTube Destiel supercuts. I read some fic (I think @andhumanslovedstories beautiful Cas/OC fic was my entry point?). I read meta. I watched some more YouTube scene packs. I read even more fic. I watched some of S4, some of S1, some random fan fav episodes. And then Destiel lodged itself so deeply, thouroughly into my brain that it took over and hasn't relinquished control in the last two years. The most tenacious, pervasive brain worm to date.

This ship got it all, and this fandom got it all, and there's such delightful, powerful, batshit crazy, romantic, expertedly crafted fanfic out there, it's like being a starving child in the world's biggest candystore.

So without further ado, here's some of my very favorite fics from this infinite trove, with all my thanks to the wonderful writers who keep delighting and awing me with their dedication and craft. There'll of course be some recency bias at play but you can browse my bookmarks over here to chose from over 100 excellent and well-curated SPN stories.

💕CATEGORY: SWOONWORTHY💕

Wildly romantic fics that warm you up from the inside.

It Won't Be Perfect by someonetoanyone (10K words) Summary: Dean daydreams about what it'd be like to let himself love Cas freely.

Why I love it: the humor, the spot-on characterizations, and the quintessential late season Destiel-ness of being so deeply love with your best friend that it's too big to actually do anything about. Just. So warm.

Rock Lobster by Ginger Fail (13K) Summary: Cas decides that the lobsters Dean planned to cook need to get back home. Impromptu beach vacation ensues!

Why I love it: This road trip story is fresh and invigorating like a sea breeze! Fun, entertaining and full of deep, deep fondness.

Seek to Know You Better by ahurston (32K)

Summary: On a road trip, Dean and Cas play the 36 Questions That Lead To Love.

Why I love it: They’re so deliberatedly, carefully starting a relationship here. They try so hard to bridge the gaps and meet each other halfway. A very mature take on love that feels nourishing.

☢️CATEGORY: BRAINWORMS GALORE☢️

Fics that make you go BARK BARK BARK.

samson went back to bed by piesexuality (9k, @twoheadedcas) Summary: Cas strikes a deal with Chuck - keeping his family together comes at the price of their free will.

Why I love it: What if Cas got his revenge for the Mala'ak box? What if love came at the price of everything you've been fighting for? What if a story twisted the knife oh so sweetly? Each word of this one lands a punch. Made me insane in the best of ways (cue pinned fanart).

In sickness by @saintedcastiel (41K) Summary: S4 redux but Castiel has a fetish: giving Dean the sniffles.

Why I love it: This one is soooo. Can barely find words for it. It taps into Cas' early season alienness and psychosexual obsession with Dean, brilliantly demonstrates Casdean vs Samruby parallels, and each word is just. Perfect. ARGH!

so much smoke in a hall full of mirrors by AreYouReady (6K, @autisticandroids ) Summary: Godstiel is losing his heavenly war. Crowley provides a compliant Dean-doll for him to release his frustrations upon.

Why I love it: Urgh, this one is sooo dark. Taps into the scary, intimidating and alien aspects of Godstiel so well. Gore, consent and psychosexual issues galore. Delicious.

Special mention: In a Parked Car, Exhuming Ophelia by @an-android-in-a-tutu (17K). Still need to comment properly ;)

💣CATEGORY: EMOTIONAL WRECKING BALLS💣

Angsty fics that tear you to pieces to remake you better.

What Used To Be Mine by someonetoanyone (48K words) Summary: Dean never makes his apology prayer in Purgatory - Cas dies, Dean mourns.

Why I love it: Oh god, this is a heavy hitter. Just, straight up insurmontable grief, packaged in poetic, raw language to make you shed tears and tears. Loved it so much.

Ignite your bones By ilovehowyouletmefall (67K, @angelinthefire) Summary: Dean accepts Chuck's deal: killing Sam to save the world.

Why I love it: Cruuuuel cruel premise for a story that doesn’t pull its punches. It gets dark in Dean’s head and everyone around him suffers. Wonderfully written. The ending set my brain on fire.

Right Where you Left Me by outdean (93K, @armandgender)

Summary: Cas comes back from the Empty after 10 years to find Dean married to another man.

Why I love it: This one is a riiiide. When grief has become a part of you but your love comes back… When you return from the dead and have to carve a new space into the world for yourself... nothing is easy here, but the emotions are INTENSE. Also, autistic!Cas for the win.

Special mention: Who Ya Gonna Call? by saintedcastiel (50K) and Clear skies in spring by enochianprayer (WIP)

💥CATEGORY: EPIC RIDES💥

Expansive, wild adventures with lots of ups and downs

Spirit of the West by teen_dean (140K, @urne-buriall)

Summary: An 18y old Dean grew up on a horse farm – cue veterinarian Castiel. The summer of a lifetime ensues.

Why I love it: So this is one of my very favorite stories, ever ever, and I cannot recommand enough to immediatedly suscribe to the author’s Substack to be able to follow it in „real time“ next summer. It’s cinematic, rich, full of darkness and light, it’s everything a story can aspire to, I’m just. I just really love it.

Second Verse, Same as The First by LaLaCat1 (135K)

Summary: Endverse!Cas is sent back to the start of S1 and is determined to make things right this time round.

Why I love it: a desperate and badass Cas, unfridging everyone, a thrilling plot, moments of awesome for the entire cast, gripping action scenes, a romance for the ages… this is a genuinely amazing story.

back road, black road by eden22 (167K)

Summary: 18y old Sam gets kidnapped by Hell on his way to Stanford. Dean tries to deal.

Why I love it: So this one’s not Destiel-centric but does have wonderful Destiel moments. It’s also very heavy on the gore and the angst (NOT for the faint of stomach), but expertly crafted, fascinating and frankly it deserves more love. Held my breath for half the read and never knew where it’d take me.

Special mention: It's The End Of The World (As We Know It) by tiamatv (140K)

🤪CATEGORY: DESTIEL INSANITY🤪

Uproariously funny stories about the intricate rituals these two weirdos get up too.

Life Skills by ilovehowyouletmefall (26K)

Summary: Dean teaches a newly human Cas how to be „a real man“.

Why I love it: Dean coming to Big Self-Realizations while trying to have platonic threesomes with Cas is so perfect. Very endearing, tender and funny. Also, smoking hot sex.

the cheapest room in the house by biggaybenny (89K)

Summary: Dean downloads Grindr for Cas

Why I love it: Just. Late season Dean being deranged about Cas’ sexuality while everyone watches on in utter confusion. Equally hilarious and deeply moving

according to all known laws of life by @sobsicles (29k)

Summary: Cas comes back from the Empty to a Dean who won’t stop playing gay chicken.

Why I love it: They are both such petty, insane weirdos in this one. They said „can every situation be turned into a squabble“ and didn’t wait for an answer. So funny, so tender

Special mention: Wedding Vows and Negotiations by GingerFail (6K)

That's it, enjoy and leave your writers some much-deserved love!

#destiel #fanfic rec #supernatural #spn #spn fic #deancas #nov 5th #destiel fanfic #dean x castiel #my posts #long post #it was so hard to choose TT_TT #this fandom is amazing

[wannab-urs]

Gin's 2023 sappy post

It's hard for me to believe that at the beginning of this year, I didn't know a single one of my best friends in the world existed. But it's true!

How we got here

I'm not quite sure exactly when I started looking up Pedro Pascal on Tumblr, but it was sometime after February. I'd watched Game of Thrones and Oberyn was my favorite character, but I was in one of my periods of not being on Tumblr (I've had this account for about 10 years, but it's seen many fandoms and I haven't always been active).

I watched the first few episodes of The Last of Us that had come out - I was 3 episodes behind I think - and immediately looked up Joel Miller on Tumblr. How could I not? Anyway, give me ten minutes on this hellsite and a middle aged man with a huge imdb and watch me develop a hyperfixation.

So then I looked up interviews. I watched basically every interview this man ever did, but I remember that the Lie Detector interview and his appearance on the Talk Easy podcast are really what did me in. I went from admiring this man as an actor and thinking he's pretty to basically being in love with him.

Anyways....

I didn't mean to start reading fanfic? I come from the world of Destiel on AO3. I never wrote it, I just read copious amounts of it. I'd never read reader insert, much less straight reader insert, and I'd never written a word of anything even resembling a fanfiction.

But I found @prolix-yuy, @frannyzooey, @joelscruff, @fuckyeahdindjarin, and @ezrasbirdie (check the spreadsheet, y'all are at the very top!) and I was hooked.

Then I read Psychomanteum by @whatsnewalycat and Celestial Navigation by @write-and-buried and was inspired to parade my trauma around in a Dieter shaped trench coat: AGOY was born.

@beskarandblasters is the first person I really talked to on here. In fact, Kel is the one who introduced me to most of my friends on here. And we've been harassing each other on the daily since. I hope to 🦵 her in real life someday soon ❤️. I love you, bitch. You mean the world to me.

I could never ever ever list all of my dear friends I've made on here. Seriously, there are so many of you that mean the world to me. But I'm gonna list a few.

My cannibal crew @pr0ximamidnight and @atinylittlepain, without whom Love as Violence Dave (starving season), Head up his Ass Javi (in the a.m.), and the later editions of loser druggie Dieter (AGOY) would not exist - or at least they wouldn't be as good as they are.

My darling soup snake, the loml, my spider twin, my forever partner in making bitches cry (it's us, we're bitches, making each other cry in an endless loop) @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin. #1 AGOY stan forever, you may love my own magnum opus more than I love it. Thanks for listening to me scream about every pedro boy on the planet and thanks for screaming right back at me. I love you.

The random college student I found by accident, decided to take under my wing, and then was subsequently taken under their wing bc it turns out they have more fandom experience and life advice than I can ever hope to have @idolatrybarbie. Bea, my darling, thanks for always letting me bitch, for showing me fics I never thought I'd be into (The Santa Claus AU Frankie Morales Free Use Kink, anyone) but that I often was into, for encouraging my writing, and for being fucking real with me.

The pedrostories crew, but especially @pedrorascal - I love screaming about Pedro with you at... 2:30 in the morning my time (we love time zones!). Thanks for letting me be a terrible mod for your fic archive blog and never getting mad at me for not doing my job. And for being a wonderful, kind, amazing person all the fucking time.

I'm being so serious when I say I could list at least 20 more people. People who brightened my day with a reblog or a message. Or who wrote a fic I still think about at least once a week. Or who made a gifset that is permanently etched into my brain. People I talked to in discords and most likely trauma dumped on and they listened and they cared and they let me hold their trauma in return. I love you guys so fucking much.

Conclusion

I never could have imagined I'd be a writer and run a fic rec blog at 24. Especially not for Pedro Pascal Characters. But here we are -- and I can honestly say it has been the highlight of my year. And I bought a house this year.

I have so many new friends and a new hobby (I never wrote at all before this) just because I wanted to Fuck That Old Man. Incredible.

#gin is being sappy #i love y'all

[destielfanfic]

from the inbox, #10

I love to see new asks about post season 15 destiel fics but my answers are mostly the same, unfortunately. The usual disclaimer applies - our blog transitioned to archive in January 2018, during season 13, and our new fic recs drastically decreased.

Hello, could you recommend any plot-driven fics set post-15x20 that are a bit longer and also explore the relationship between Dean and Castiel? I'm mostly looking for something that is canon compliant (Dean dies and goes to heaven in 15x20)

I’ve answered similar asks on our previous from the inbox posts, so definitely check out those. But for the sake of convenience, here are some links - post 15x20 rec lists Happiness isn’t in the Having and Good things Do Happen . These are mostly short fics, but you can always check out the authors and see if they have longer fics. 

This is random, but do you know any fics where Dean starts dating cas because he feels bad? Something like dean dates castiel as a pity date? I've really been wanting to read something like that :p 

This is very random indeed! Especially if that is meant in a post 15x20 setting. I must admit I’m drawing a blank here. 

hi! not sure if this is the right place to ask this (if it’s not im rly sorry!) but can u rec me some destiel fics where like . dean thought they were dating all along and cas didn’t? sorry if it didn’t make a lot of sense! thanks  

And this is an opposite of the previous ask!

OK, guys, since there is huge interest in post finale destiel fics, I’m opening floor for follower recs/ self recs on this post. Please add in reblogs or notes destiel fics that fit these criteria: 

A - longer, plot driven post 15x20 fics that explore Dean and Cas relationship

B - fics where Dean takes Cas on a pity date after Cas confessed his love in 15x18; canon verse fics are preferred but if you have some AUs, feel free to add

C - fics where Dan thought they were dating while Cas had no idea

＊＊＊＊

We have some fic suggestions from our followers！

A - canon verse fics dealing with 15x20

The Blood Curse by Labgeek2002 [M, 32,700 word count]

Castiel has been rescued from the Empty, but the spell used to retrieve him tears a hole in the dimensional wall that acts as barrier protecting Earth from the pull of everlasting darkness. As the Empty feeds off of Castiel's grace to sustain itself, driving him closer to death with every passing minute, Dean becomes desperate to save him. The only way to repair the damage is for Dean, Sam, and Cas to travel back in time to obtain a witch's stone that's in the possession of John Winchester, circa 2002. A twenty-three year old Dean Winchester will serve as their guide as they navigate the tumultuous father-son relationship that transcends time itself before the Empty draws its final curtain.

Beyond This Illusion by tiaevans87 [NC-17, 161,400 word count]

“Are you serious, Dean? Your djinn-dream started with you dying?” Sam asks incredulously from the passenger seat on the way back to the bunker. “Well, technically it started with us going on a hunt,” Dean points out. He licks his lips, jaw clenching. “I mean, there was Heaven, too, and that was pretty cool.” Sam stares at him. “Unbelievable,” he breathes, scrunching his face up in distaste. When Dean glares at him, he holds his hands up defensively and chuckles weakly. “Sorry, man, but that just sounds pretty lame.” He leans back and folds his arms. “It just…I dunno. Kinda sounds like something Chuck would cook up. Just you and me. No one else. I mean, really?” He scoffs, slumping. *~*~* In which some people come back, Cas learns to be human (the right way, this time), Dean Winchester finally realizes that good things do happen, and they all get their version of the post-credits, apple-pie life they deserved. AKA: Screw Chuck's narrative.

B - Dean takes Cas on a pity date

On Labor by a_good_soldier [NC-17, 24,600 word count]

Cas is back from the Empty, and Dean knows how to be grateful.

because he wears cowboy boots by mmtion [NC-17, 65,300 word count]

When Cas comes back from the Empty, Dean has to rethink everything about their relationship, and Dean’s new, post-Chuck duty. He wants Cas to be happy and get what he wants. So, if he wants Dean, then he has him. Dean’s new responsibility is to be the best boyfriend Cas will ever want or need. If that means moving out of the bunker, and not driving the Impala, and letting Cas fuck him, then that’s what he has to do. It’s an easy deal. It should be an easy life. So how come Dean still can’t quite make sense of it?

#destiel #from the inbox #su #this is kinda experiment #let's see how that goes #all recs fitting the criteria are welcome #feel free to add some thoughts #your very own mini reviews

[sunglassesmish]

Man I don't really care about Daniela that much but damn is the twitter drama funny. people are inserting Misha in random photos of themselves or others and it gives mishapocalypse but in reverse colors

before all the stuff with the destiel fanart i literally had 0 thoughts about her. now i know she hates destiel and seemingly is obsessed with jensen and doesn’t like misha all that much. and everything she does is so funny to me in that it’s so embarrassing.

but i’ve laughed so much over all the memes and jokes about misha inserting himself into things. i didn’t think about like that before, but it really does seem reminiscent of mishapocalypse…

these are my personal faves:

#anon #ask

[rewatching-sam-and-dean]

Why this Doesn’t Mean Destiel : Part 1 - Mixed Tape

I may make this a series. I may not. But I’m feeling annoyed by a certain side of fandom, so I’m going to take a look at moments (or things) that are claimed to totally make D and C cannon, and discuss why I disagree. If you like the ship, please just save yourself the annoyance and skip on past this post. If you read this anyway or are not a fan, and have anything to add, I welcome your thoughts.

THE TAPE:

First, and I can’t believe I have to say this, a mixed tape is not actually inherently romantic. Friends make mixes for each other all the time, or used to before you could just share playlists or whatever them kids are doing these days. For example, my friends have ripped me CDs because they had better internet, they gave me a mix for my birthday, we went on a road trip and they left me the mix, or just because. I have done many of these things for my friends in return. A missed-tape or CD is simply a way to share songs we like with people we care about, or even an acquaintance. Can it be romantic? Absolutely! Is it inherently so? No.

Why isn’t this particular tape romantic? Check the name: "Dean's Top 13 Zepp Traxx.” This looks, more than anything, like a tape Dean made for himself ("Dean's"). As in, "I really like these particular songs, so I’m going to put them on one tape, so I don’t have to keep changing tapes over on road trips." Also, note the "Zepp Traxx." This looks more to me like something a teenager would write because it looks "cool" than anything else. I mean, a Dean who is pushing 40 might write "Traxx" on a tape — maybe — but it doesn’t seem that likely. So, it’s more than likely this tape was made decades ago, for himself, thus not a romantically intended (or thought out) mixed-tape. There is nothing about the tape itself to indicate it was made for Cass or that it has any special meaning.

DEAN:

Can we be honest here for one minute, people? Can anyone — anyone who has actually watched the whole show rather than cherry picking certain people's scenes — actually picture Dean Winchester, sitting down with an old boom box, lovingly, tenderly loading tapes into one side and recording onto a blank tape in the other side, thinking, "Sigh! These songs are so special to me because they make me think of my crush, Cass!" Or "I’m going to make Cass a tape of the most romantic Zeppelin songs I can to show him I care!"? If you answered "Yes" to that … this is not the blog for you. Also, I doubt that you know who the canon Dean Winchester is, as opposed to the fanon man-shapedr 14-year-old girl version from Tumblr or AO3. Dean doesn’t have time (or inclination) to sit down and make a mixed tape from scratch at this time in the show, especially when, you know, good luck finding a working tape recorder / cassette player / boom box that still works these days. The MOL bunker was frozen in time just a touch before tape cassettes were invented, so I doubt they have one hanging around the place. So, he went and bought something he could make a tape for Cass with? Really? I’m thinking not.

The most likely scenario for Dean giving Castiel a mixed tape? They are in the impala, maybe Sam is there sitting shotgun, maybe he isn’t. Cass starts talking about how he found merit in music Sam liked, or just some random music, and Dean says, "Come on Cass! That music is crap! Here, listen to this. This is the good stuff!" Then he rummages in his box of tapes one-handed, while driving, and tosses one to Cass. "Keep that one. I have a others," Dean adds. Then Cass says, "I’ll treasure it always, Dean!" No I’m kidding. Cass says, "Okay, Dean." He may or may not intend to actually listen to it at some point. After he finds a tape deck, of course.

So, does the mixed tape mean nothing? No, it’s still a nice gesture to give something you made to someone you care about. Do I think Dean put a lot of soecific thought into it, just for Cass? No. I think it’s actually similar to Sam letting Cass hang out in his room (presumable on his bed) watching Netflix on his TV, doing something nice for a friend and sharing media.

CASTIEL:

Even if Dean had sat sobbing over his mix for hours while he painstakingly crafted it just for Cass, it still wouldn’t equal Destiel. Why? Because Cass clearly didn’t appreciate it since he simply used it as an excuse to enter Dean's room and steal from him. Even if it was intended as an act of love, it was used as a tool for deception and betrayal. Thus, this does not support Destiel, rather it makes a case against it from Cass' POV.

THE WRITER INTENTIONS

Obviously, I can’t speak to these personally, but my thoughts on their possible thought process behind the mixed tape. First, they needed Cass to return something to Dean so he can get into his room, and it has to be something that was given as a nice gesture to heighten the betrayal. A tape makes sense because it’s not something so huge that it would be automatically given a ton of significance, but it also isn’t totally insignificant either. Second, Dean has a lot of tapes and he loves music, it’s very possible for him to give one to Cass off screen without the audience getting sidetracked and wondering why (how is he going to play it BTW? Go sit alone in one of the cars he’s stolen?). Third, do I think the writers were also throwing destiellers a bone? Probably, but throwing fans a bone does not equal queerbaiting because nothing else in Dean and Cass' relationship points to romance (and Dean is not into guys or Supernatural Beings). Throwing fans a small bone also doesn’t meant it’s leading to a romantic endgame. They do it with Wincest all the time, after all.

Overall, to me the purpose of the mixtape was to show Cass throwing something Dean gave him back in his face, so he could go behind his back for supernatural purposes. Again. If someone wants to read the tape as a romantic gift from Dean (it isn’t), that actually only makes what Cass uses it for worse. Thus, the tape does not support Dean and Cass romance.

And because I have to, this is a mixed tape (CD) with clear intent.

#supernatural #anti destiel #dean winchester #castiel critical #brief Smallville nod #Zepplin tape #my thoughts #SPN Meta #fandom wank

[hozierisgod]

I kinda wanna write a modern/human AU for spn, destiel and Sabriel in Highschool/college where they’re all just tired students (Dean was blackmailed into joining drama club (he ended up enjoying it 😏)) and they were in a play (Angels in America? Idrk just yet) and Sam and Cas were love interests, Dean is a backstage dude (I suck at remembering terminology sorry) and Gabe is like Cas’ characters father or smt 🤷 (this is entirely unplanned random thought).

Anyway, Dean and Cas fall in love and admit it first (ik, crazy, but it makes sense later) and they’re in like a secret relationship for a bit, but Sam figures it out really quick (he’s Sam and Dean ain’t slick).

However, Gabe doesn’t know, all be thinks is that they like each other but haven’t admitted it yet, so he enlists Sam to help him get the two of them together, and Sam could’ve just told Gabe, but going along with it is more fun.

So, along the journey of getting them together, Sam and Gabe fall for each other, and then at the end of the year, after their performance Dean and Cas kiss offstage in the rush of the moment and Gabe and Sam do the same, standing back to back (Sam and cas are back to back, when the kisses break Gabe and Dean stare at each other bc like “HEY THATS MY LITTLE BROTHER DUDE”, I’ve thought about this particular scene a lot) anyway, then happy ending blah blah blah.

Yeah.

Kinda wanna write it but who knows 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

#spnfandom #spn fanfic #fanfic ideas #supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #gabriel #sabriel #destiel

[youchangedmedestiel]

This is so funny to me to see multiple posts asking why Destiel and SPN are trending.

Well, maybe it's because you're all asking why. So yeah, it just keeps trending.

I'm really enjoying this though. Always happy to see it trending. Keep going!

#destiel #deancas #spn #supernatural #my random thoughts about destiel #my random thoughts about spn

[infamous-if]

Wait wait hear me out I saw that ask about inputing custom lyrics and how you might include pre-set lyrics and idk your thoughts on AI but I personally have never written lyrics before in my life so when I got to that part of the demo I panicked and used ChatGPT for the first time ever and typed in something random like "give me a four line poem about..." and after a couple tries it turned out surprisingly well. I used "chainsmoking" and "sensual" as the prompt bc i'm an edgy bitxh and there were several good results but the one I picked for my playthrough just as an example was: "The way you inhale, with a practiced ease / Sucking down your cigarettes, such a tease. / The tendrils of smoke, they swirl and rise / My senses reel, your addiction my demise." and idk maybe I'm crazy but in my mind that goes kinda hard and fit exactly that edgy bitch vibe I was going for so maybe ChatGPT could be helpful in coming up with pre-set lyrics?

P.S. Oh also No One asked but my MC's band is called King July and the fan base is known as The Summer Court and I'm just really proud of myself for coming up with both names without using 50 million name generators (or even, like, one tehe) like I normally would with that kinda thing anyway hope this was yeah thanks byeeee :))))))

P.P.S. Wait sorry i realized i had a question so will we maybe have the chance to customize a "ship name" for our MC and RO kinda like how we could customize the fan base name or whatever like some Destiel Reylo shit bc I may be an edgy bitch but i'm also a cringe farmer so ya know yeehaw keep me in your thoughts and prayers

This is such a super awesome ideas and the lyrics are fucking sick.

BUT i do wonder the ethics behind doing that ahssdjs obviously it's okay for you guys to do it since it's your personal playthroughs but would that be alright using ChatGPT for a game I'm publishing publicly? Maybe I'm overthinking it but that's such a great idea hdshsdh

so far my lyrics have been pretty basic, but i do have plans to have the story maybe have full on songs which means...i need to get my songwriting chops up.

and your band name and fandom name are awesome!! everyone has been so creative!

as for a ship name, maybe! Shipping and fans pairing people together does come up so I would say most likely.

#inbox

[songliili]

2023 writing roundup

i was tagged by @hgejfmw-hgejhsf and @rockyroadkylers!

i feel like i've spent my whole year writing, but i also know that i've spent months without doing it so i can't say how much it was month by month. but i posted three fics this year so like. that's an achievement!

let's see what we got.

January:

the great dean court off - Supernatural, 21.8k, M (chapter update) [someday i will finish it, i promise]

Of all the things Dean expected to find when he came back from the bathroom break, a folded piece of paper with "hey, if you’re not gay, my friend thinks you’re cute. here’s her number 316-557-9608 (and if you’re gay, here’s mine 316-997-2018)" written on, was not it. - Or the one where Dean organises a dating contest because he's bi and can't decide between two options.

September:

I Had Some Time (With You) - Supernatural, 23.9k, E

It's 2005 when things go to hell. Well. They go to hell for everyone except Dean, ‘cause he was ready for it. Well. He was ready for the apocalypse, not for the gorgeous man who fell into his life, quite literally. OR A Destiel rewrite of Bill and Frank's love story as shown on HBO's The Last of Us episode 3: Long Long Time that uses elements of both universes.

November:

we all have a hunger - RWRB, 22.9k, E

Alex’s journey of self discovery started one random night five years ago, when he was scrolling his favorite porn website to relax after midterms. He chose a video with the preview of two guys in the threesome category, thinking nothing of it, and came so hard he thought he was going to pass out. The threesome didn’t happen, the girl just sat there looking at the two guys going at it, just like Alex did. After that night, saying that the tall, blond and gorgeous actor with a fucking sinful shoulder to waist ratio didn’t do it for him was a complete lie, so maybe, maybe, Alex could be excused when he freezes up when said man - even more tall, blond and gorgeous in real life - stretches a hand toward him and says “I’m Henry, Pez’s ‘best mate of honor’, as he says.” with his perfectly infuriating British accent. — OR: Henry is a porn star, Alex is a fan.

December:

Fill My Stocking - RWRB, 6k, E

Alex has spent the past fifteen minutes talking with David about his favourite treats. Not that the dog answered, but Alex was undeterred and kept going, uncaring that Henry had asked him to give him an hour and then he’d join him in hanging up fairy lights and mistletoe everywhere. Very well. If Alex wants Henry’s attention, he'll have it. It's probably not what Alex thought he’d accomplish with his little scheme, but it's a compromise between Henry's needs and Alex's wants, and that's all that can be done. OR: Alex wants some attention and Henry has to get creative.

Upcoming in 2024:

part 2 of the pornstar verse (title undecided):

picks up the day after the ending of part one, it's alex's first christmas in london

Like Father, Like Son:

alex is a horse trainer and has a crush on arthur fox. he's the trainer on set for arthur fox's new movie (a queer western). his son, henry fox, visits the set and well. alex is fucked.

I hope you don't mind. (part 3 of the pornstar verse):

henry's bad days and how alex helps him go through them

Other things I hope I manage to put out next year (or at least start writing):

Your body is the Sistine Chapel:

what if dean was as tattooed as he was supposed to be? which tattoos would he get? for whom would he get them?

untitled airbnb fic:

alex travels to london as a reward for finishing college, and henry is his airbnb host whose dog likes alex a little too much.

untitled mandalorian!alex fic:

alex is the mandalorian, david is grogu. that's all i have for now.

untitled scarlet witch!henry/sword agent!alex fic:

inspired by this tweet. i have nothing more than this to give you atm.

i posted 62.406 words this year, and written many more. i'm fairly new to writing, so this is a real accomplishment for me. my biggest goal was to post a fully finished chaptered fic, and i did! then i started a series, and wrote something shorter than 7k, and i have so many ideas for future fics that i genuinely don't know where to start. i hope i manage to post at least a couple next year!

tagging: @affectionatelyrs @firenati0n @absoluteaudacitywrites @gayrootvegetable @leojfitz @anincompletelist @ssmtskw @littlemisskittentoes @cactusdragon517 @read-and-write- and everyone else that wants to join!

#tag game #writing roundup #spn #supernatural #rwrb #red white and royal blue #fan fiction #songliili writes

[douwatahima]

idk i'm feeling kinda riled up today and i want to talk about why the fight for ofmd is so important to me.

so listen. i've been in fandoms for a loooooong time. i remember when the sheer idea of a show (that wasn't something like, say, queer as folk) having any sort of lgbt representation was a major rarity. the idea of a random character suddenly coming out in your favourite sci fi/fantasy/action show? no way in hell. and those of us in fandom kinda came to accept that. we were queering the hell out of everything we came across, don't get me wrong, but it was because the idea of a series suddenly having a character textually be queer was just…not a thing that happened most of the time.

then came the age of queerbaiting. as someone who was in the supernatural fandom from very early on, i remember how those first few seasons of the ~great destiel saga~ felt to watch. they actively hinted at and joked about their relationship! they acknowledged the elephant in the room! surely they wouldn't do that unless it meant something!!! but then of course came the years and years of the cast and crew sneering at the people who had the audacity to…listen to the words that came out of the character's mouths and have thoughts about them. and yeah, eventually (like a decade later) cas told dean he loved him, but even now the people who worked on the show seem reluctant to say that that was a romantic moment. and that's just one example that i'm more intimately familiar with! there are so many others! just straight up gaslighting queer fans so they can keep making money off of us with no intention of actually giving us what we want; all while acting like they were doing us a favour by doing anything at all.

and it sucked! it clearly sucked! but the more time went on the less surprising it became. because at the end of the day it came down to what it always comes down to; money. there's this idea (not just in media) that there are certain people who are the "default". people whose experiences are universal and easy to understand. white people. straight people. cis people. when it comes to media, stories about these people are seen as something anyone can watch and understand. but when you try to tell stories about people who fall outside of these categories? well, now you're making niche content that only people who fall into that niche will be able to identify with.

and look, i know i'm preaching to the choir here. this is tumblr. we all know there's a lot of racism, sexism, homophobia, and transphobia in the world. my point is that the narrative around queerbaiting from an industry standpoint seemed to be "yeah, we want the ad revenue from all of these lgbt people watching our shows, but if we commit to actually making any of our characters queer we're going to isolate our straight audience and lose most of our viewers". and there was never any concrete way to disprove that. so yeah. we would occasionally be blessed by a ~very special show~ that actually depicted queerness (usually about younger people coming out, or about the tragedies that can and have faced people in our community), but the idea of branching out beyond that seemed like a no go.

and then along came our flag means death. a show about pirates that also talked about toxic masculinity and had characters who were casually queer in every different variety and also featured people with different body types who came from different cultures and who were all treated with kindness and grace. a show that didn't necessarily market itself specifically as ~a queer show~ (which, was probably in part due to trying to bury the lead which sucks, but the point still stands) but rather a fun show anyone could watch. that wasn't specifically about coming out or tragedy but was more so about joy, and community, and love. and here's the thing. here's the wild as fuck thing that happened. this show? it didn't lose all of its viewers when those last two episodes of season 1 aired and it confirmed without a shadow of a doubt that ed and stede were in love. the opposite happened. this show fucking soared into the stratosphere.

i remember the first time i saw those parrot analytics charts showing that ofmd was the most in demand new series; out performing marvel even. i was so overcome i legit broke down in tears. because it turns out all of those times i had been told to sit back and accept the scraps i was given because that was all my community was profitable enough to get, those people were wrong. we could've had this the whole time! WE COULD'VE HAD THIS THE WHOLE TIME!!! and as the weeks progressed and ofmd remained at the top of every chart, as the show continued to succeed, i felt such an immense amount of joy! those people were wrong! we can just have this and it'll do well!!!

and yeah, apparently that wasn't enough to convince the powers that be. they spent forever deciding whether to renew it and when they finally did the budget was cut nearly in half and the people at max decided they needed to oversee the show a lot more. all of this sucks. but the thing is they made season 2 and they fucking did it again! the show got even better critics scores than last time! the show was doing numbers better than season 3 of succession! the merch, only released in october, became some of the best selling merch of 2023 on the max shop! by max's own admission season 2 was one of the biggest hits of the year for them!!! like, what more is there? the show is a success!!!

so yeah. i'm not going to accept the fucking stupid excuses max gives as to why they cancelled it. saying that it didn't have the numbers (it did), or that they didn't know how to market violence (they do), or that it didn't have awards buzz (it has literally been nominated for awards and there's still active fyc ads the company itself made) just doesn't cut it. there was no reason to cancel it other than the idea that diverse media "doesn't sell". and max, by airing this show you have shown me that that fucking isn't true. it's never been true. so i'm going to keep fighting for this one until someone picks it up or until i'm old and grey because it isn't just about ofmd. it's about the belief that our stories, the stories of people who aren't "the default" are worth telling. by every metric they are worth telling. and that is something that i know is worth fighting for.

#tv: our flag means death #ofmd #sorry this gets kinda preachy i have a lot of feelings about this

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

destiel!steddie pt.3!!

Pt. 1 | Pt. 2 | NOW ON AO3!: you can hear the call (when trouble's on the way)

ok so it's been a while since i posted part two of this, but i guess today was the day i decided to go feral and not only finish this part but also include the first ever smut i've ever written.

destiel (and the fics i used to read of them) has been on the brain in a big way recently, friends. enjoy!!!

Eddie gapes at her, his mouth opening and closing on its own.

“What’d I miss, kiddos?” Wayne sinks into the previously abandoned chair at the end of the booth and picks up his (now cold) burger. “Eddie, shut your trap, you’re not a goldfish.”

“I called Robin, she’s on her way.”

Wayne hums in response around a mouthful of food “So where’s the man of the hour?”

“Where’dya think? Flapped away like a panicked pigeon.” Eddie gripes.

Wayne hums again “I didn’t know your angel knew how to feel panicked.”

His face grew hot “He’s not my angel, old man, shut up…”

“If anything, he’s Robin’s.” Nancy shrugs. “He’s basically her soulmate.”

“Ah, she’s his girl?” Wayne asks

“No, they are ‘platonic with a capital “P”.’ soulmates.” she emphasizes with mimed air-quotes. “The literal best of friends, inseparable and codependent almost to a fault.”

Eddie tunes out Nancy catching Wayne up on what he missed while he went to check on Fred, staring out the front window at the sparsely filled lot.

He can picture the upcoming events so clearly: this Robin character flies into the parking lot in some old beater, barges through the door, looking around frantically for Steve, only to find her friend casually eating fries with an old man and some random frizzy-haired guy. All three with a significant lack of Steve.

“Where the hell is he?” Wait, that was exactly what had happened, wasn’t it? “Nancy, you said you found Steve and yet I see no Steve.” The poor girl looks frantic.

He glances out the window again and sees a shiny retro BMW haphazardly parked out front. Okay, so not exactly a beater, but still.

“Robin, sit down, we’ll tell you everything.” Nancy’s voice is cool and soothing and yet;

“I don’t want to sit down, I want to know where Steve is.” Robin says, still irritated, as she sits down across from Eddie.

“Well??” She asks him incredulously.

“You better start talkin’ Ed.” Wayne gestures for him to get on with it with a particularly long french fry.

“Okay, well, I’m Eddie, this is Wayne, my uncle. We are hunters.”

“Hunters.” Robin repeats.

“Yeah, not that kind. We hunt supernatural creatures and about six months ago, I died.”

“Okay, this I hadn’t heard, I swear.” Nancy says to Robin, then turns her full attention back to Eddie.

“Somehow I don’t believe you died; also how in the hell is any of this relevant? I want to know where Steve is!”

“I’m getting there, I promise! I–okay, you know what? Fine. TL;DR is: I died, was brought back to life by something–like just fully yanked outta hell–and when we tried to summon whatever it was that did it, we first met Steve.”

Robin is silent for a moment. “Okay, despite how much I really want that whole story, that still doesn’t tell me where Steve is.”

“I don’t know where he–wait, you believe me? Just like that?”

Robin shrugs at him.

“Wait, and you too,” He points at Nancy “You believed me right away about the ghost. What the hell is happening here??”

The two women look at each other quickly then back at the two men. 

Nancy opens her mouth to reply, but is stopped when there was a fluttering sound near the diner entrance.

Eddie is facing away from the door so he turns to see Steve walk in, and has a fleeting thought about if the one waitress and cook still here past midnight are seeing all this too.

He expected Robin to be on her feet and running to the other man immediately, but she must see the angel and not the man, recognizing that it isn’t quite her Steve.

“Hello.” The angel states simply when he returns to their booth. “You must be Robin.”

Robin has tears flowing freely down her face now and it strikes Eddie straight to the heart.

“You are not Steve.”

“You would be correct, Ms. Robin, I am not. May I?” Steve gestures to the bench across from her, to the seat he’d vacated previously.

Robin says nothing, eyes wide, and tears falling over her trembling lip.

“Go ahead and sit Steve, where’d you go?”

“Thank you, Nancy, I left to retrieve your Steve.” The angel sits beside Eddie, who forgets to move when hit with that little nugget of information, and almost gets a lapful of angel before scooting over against the wall.

“You went to get Steve?” Nancy asks.

“Yes, I returned to my Father’s Kingdom and asked him to come with me to see you.”

“So….he can hear us?” Eddie asks.

“Yes, if it will be alright with you all, I will let him take over and speak with you. I will pay any conversation no mind, so please, speak with him as you would normally.”

Nancy nods, “Robin, would you like to talk with Steve?”

It seems like Robin still can’t quite form words, but nods her head furiously to her friend’s question while still glaring at the thing in front of her.

Steve gives a small nod and closes his eyes.

He takes in and releases a long breath, as he does, Eddie can spot the small twitches his eyes make beneath his lids and the slightly more pronounced breathing pattern that give away when angel becomes human.

Hazel eyes open, then immediately start blinking away tears. “Robin…” Steve breathes out like a sigh of relief.

A sharp, short, aggravated scream erupts from Robin, and her hands start flying.

“Whoa, what is happening right now? Is she freaking out? Is she okay?” “Yeah, she’s freaking out, and yes, she’s fine.” Nancy assures him, tracking Robin's movements with her eyes “She’s signing.” she nods and goes back to her fries.

“Ah…” Okay, that makes a bit more sense. “I would say let's leave them to it but I think we’re stuck here until they’re done.” he says, gesturing to the wall they’re sitting next to in the booth with his chin, but still watching Robin’s hands, trying his damndest to see if he can possibly pick up on anything she’s saying.

Nancy snorts a short laugh and watches her two friends for a bit. “I’d offer to teach you but I only know a few myself, y’know, just in case they–well, just her now–needs something in a non-verbal episode.”

“Do these happen a lot?” Wayne asks, his eyes also tracking Steve and Robin’s hands

Nancy gives him a sympathetic look. “The two of them have been through a lot, we all have, but yes, they’re more often than I’d like.”

Steve waves his hand at Nancy, getting her attention. He signs something, pointing to her, does something that looks like grabby hands with his hands stacked atop one another, then points to himself, moves to tap his closed fingertips to his mouth, moves the same hand, palm to his chest, moving it in a circle, then finishes with a crook of one finger, like suddenly he was the star of the Shining.

Robin looks incensed that he’d dare take his attention away from her when she’s very clearly trying to yell at him some more, and waves her hand directly in his face again before launching into even faster hand motions.

Nancy pushes her nearly empty plate of fries to Steve (who somehow continues his conversation with Robin one-handed as he shovels the cold fries into his mouth sloppily), and turns to ask Wayne something, already getting out of his seat, “I got it, don’t worry, what flavor does he want?”

“Strawberry!” she calls then turns back to a shocked Eddie. “Wayne knows sign?”

“News to me.” 

“Steve asked me to get him food.” She repeats each sign he’d done, “You. Get. Me. Food. Please.”

“What was the redrum shit he did at the end?” Eddie copies the finger motion.

“A question mark!” she says cheerily, copying the motion to him.

She continues to teach Eddie what she knows, just little things, like asking for water, how to say hungry, the sign for hurt, “That one is made over wherever it hurts, it’s distinctive enough to do one-handed, too.”

Finally, after Steve’s burger is gone, milkshake half-gone, the two friends’ hands finally still; their faces are soaked through with tears, chests heaving like they really had been screaming at each other this whole time.

Eddie tentatively reaches over to touch Steve’s shoulder “You doing okay, Big Boy?”

The man startles with a squeak and Eddie removes his hand like he’d been burned. “Who–who are you??”

“Uh…” Eddie says, as astute as ever, looking to Nancy for help. She just shrugs at him. Jerk. “Sorry, Stevie–Steve, I know the angel version of you.. I’m Eddie.” He puts out his hand for the man to shake.

Steve’s face tinges pink and signs something to Robin, pointing to Eddie, putting his palm flat to his own chest, then brings both his fists together at his knuckles over his heart, redrum-ing his thumbs in sync.

Robin speaks for the first time in a while, “How the hell should I know?? Just ask him yourself.” She crosses her arms over her chest angrily and looks away.

He clears his throat and turns back to Eddie, shaking his hand. “Nice to meet you, Eddie, sorry it wasn’t before I died.”

Robin squeaks, but Steve keeps his eyes fixed to Eddie’s. “Oh, uhm, nice to meet you too, Stevi–Steve. The angel version of you is pretty okay, but I wish I had too.” he smiles, releases Steve’s hand and leans forward, stage-whispering to the other man as if the angel couldn’t hear him. “The other guy is basically just a baby in a sweater.”

Steve blinks once and erupts into the most lovely peals of laughter.

Wayne clears his throat then, and smiles, Steve’s attention is pulled to the older Munson. “Nice to meet you, son. Name’s Wayne, I’m Eddie’s uncle.”

They shake hands and Nancy speaks up, “So, Steve, what happens now? Are you going to stay here? With the angel Steve?”

The smile melts off his face at that, “Oh, uhm.. I don’t think… no. No, I want to go back.”

Both girls’ faces twinge with hurt, Nancy’s behind her gentle smile, and Robin’s more pronounced in the hurt already on her face, still looking away from her soulmate.

Something in the air changes, and both Eddie and Wayne share a look, they both feel the need to escape the conversation that’s coming.

“I am okay right now, I was super hungry, but I can feel it coming. I can tell that if I wasn’t currently half celestial being right now, that the years of dealing with Upside Down would show themselves again.” his voice gets even smaller then “I’ve really been enjoying the break from it all.”

It’s Wayne who speaks first after that, clapping Steve on the shoulder closest to him. “You enjoy your break, son. Lord knows I wish I’d had that after we dealt with those flower-faced fucks back in my day.”

Spluttering chaos erupts from the three barely adults, “After you dealt–”, “A break?!”, “Flower-faced fucks? You know about the Demogorgons??”

“How do you guys know about Demogorgons?”

“How do you know about Demogorgons??”

“It’s a monster in D&D, what does that hav–”

“Oh my god, of course that’s where they got the name from.”

“They? Who’s ‘they’??”

Wayne raises a hand to stop them, and surprisingly, it works. “Back in my day, we didn’t have’a proper name for ‘em, just called them flower-faced fucks. And yes, we dealt with a few, my buddy Fred and I went snooping around the woods near–”

“Hawkins Lab right?” Nancy cuts in.

“Yep. nearly got us, but we’d been takin’ the long way from Emerson’s house after a game’a ball. Knocked the thing’s lights out with our bats, but it disappeared.

“Over the next, what, five years? We’d somehow be the unlucky ones to run into more of ‘em, but they quieted down about a year before I left. After I got Eddie o’course.”

“Well they ramped up bigtime in the last four for us, met a girl with superpowers, there were demogorgons, demodogs, a mindflayer, the mall burned down, there were Russians, it was a whole thing.” Robin rambles off, “It’s how Steve's gotten hurt so bad. Someone” she glares at him “decided to be the punching bag every time.”

He looks sheepish. “No one else was going to do it…The party says I’m their–”

“Paladin.” Eddie finishes with him. Of course he’d be a paladin.

Steve beams at him.

“How many concussions did’ja end up with, Mr. Paladin?” Wayne grouses from his chair.

“Th-three. I think. Uhm.. I got a plate to the head once, too.” He points to a small scar at his hairline above his left eyebrow, “That was just from a racist monster though, not like, a monster monster. Started losing my hearing on that side after that…hence the ASL.”

“Fuck…” Eddie can’t help it, the word just falls from his mouth.

“There’s someone else you need to talk to, Steve.” Robin cuts in, “You are staying here until tomorrow morning at least, so I can bring Dustin to you.” and finishes with a glare. “Where are you two staying?” She directs at Eddie.

“The Hawk Inn?” He looks to Wayne for confirmation, who nods. “The one right off the main road, just past the entering Hawkins sign.”

“Fine. I will be there with Dustin tomorrow at 8 am.” She stands and gives Steve a look, then heads out the front door to the beemer.

“D’ya mind staying on the mortal plane with us for a night, Stevie?” Eddie wraps his arm over Steve’s shoulders and gives him a slight shake.

“Dustin’s really gonna love you.” Steve’s lips twitch up into a still sad smile, “And no, I don’t mind, it’s for Dustin afterall.”

“Come on then, let's get you some beauty sleep.” He shoos him off the bench after Wayne stands to pay their check. “Nance, you gonna meet us there tomorrow?”

“Of course, you still haven’t told me about this hunting business.”

–

Ten minutes after the weirdest post-hunt meal ever (and that’s saying a lot), the van rattles to a stop in front of the motel.

“I call dibs on the shower!”

“Why d’ya need to shower? Your angel cleaned us all up no problem!”

“That’s not the point, Wayne, I still feel gross and I can’t sleep unless I feel like I’m clean.”

“Whatever, I’m going to bed.” He gets the door unlocked and pushes it open for the other two, closes it, and flops down onto one of the beds. “Make sure you put down salt lines before you get in there, Ed.”

Eddie rolls his eyes, but sets their regular wards and precautions. “You want to take a shower first, Steve?”

“No, I’m alright, I’m just going to lay down I think.”

“Sure, I will be out in a few.”

He grabs up his things, preparing to take a few extra minutes to brace himself for catching a few hours on the hard motel loveseat.

Eddie ends up relaxing a bit too much while in the shower though, waking up from a doze when the water temperature starts to dip. Grumbling, he gets out and towels off, working off muscle memory alone. Dry off body, scrunch hair, pull on boxers, brush teeth, drop towel on floor, shuffle to bed.

He’s out as soon as his head touches the pillow.

—--

Eddie soon becomes aware of two things: One, how damn soft whatever it is he’s laying on is, and Two: the familiar weight of another person on top of him.

He opens his eyes, and groans as they adjust to the light to take in the sight above him. 

Steve’s flushed and slightly sweaty face blink into clarity and Eddie’s aware of a third thing. 

They’re both completely naked.

He groans again when he feels something brush across the head of his cock, then again as whatever it was wraps around him.

“St-Steve?” he breathes, “Ungh, Stevie, that feels so good.”

Steve releases his hold on the two of them, and he feels his arms secure themselves  around his back instead. He’s lifted up into Steve’s lap, straddling his knees, and arms draping around his neck.

“Tell me about it, angel.” Steve says, and Eddie looks down at his (beautiful, perfect) face, but is distracted by something behind him.

“Holy shit.” He breathes out, feeling Steve’s hair brush against his abdomen when he turns to look at what it is that caught Eddie’s attention.

“Oh, those?” the wings shuffle to life from where they’d been lying, dropped lazily to the ground from Steve’s back.

Eddie watches them curl in on themselves, folding in before unfurling back out, this time spreading high and wide. They are enormous, astounding, and leave Eddie awestruck looking up at them. The feathers catch the light in ways he hadn’t thought possible. A golden sheen glints off the chestnut and auburn colored feathers, patterns Eddie's certainly never seen before.

He reaches forward and touches a finger to the plumage, then just has to sink his whole hand into them. “They’re so soft..”

“They’re old news,” The honey-sweet sound of Steve’s voice snaps his attention back from the mesmerizing wings to the man they are protruding from. “These, however, are simply divine.” Steve says as he slides his hands up Eddie’s back from where they’d been wrapped around his waist.

If he thought the feeling of those hands on his skin was heavenly (hah), some other word entirely new needed to be created for the feeling that shot through him when Steve touched…something on his shoulder blades.

“Ah…hah…what are you–” Eddie turns his head to look over his shoulder the best he could, struggling to see what Steve’s talking about.

“C’mon darling, you can do it, lift those pretty wings of yours for me to see.” Steve sighs.

Eddie can’t compute anything he just heard in the slightest. Struggling to make sense of what the hell is happening right now and desperately trying not to come at how Steve’s words had affected him.

Through no conscious thought of his own, two dark brown, nearly black wings shoot up behind him, and Eddie is picked up from Steve’s lap for a split second from the momentum of the movement. He watches as they posture themselves into a mirror image of Steve’s (though they are noticeably smaller). Eddie feels his skin beneath the feathers contract slightly, making the feathers puff up in a feeble attempt to match themselves to the senior angel’s size.

He realizes that he’d been craning his neck to look up at his wings when he feels Steve’s lips and hot breath pepper across the column of his throat.

“Such a sweet little thing, my Eddie.” Steve laughs against his adam's apple when Eddie bucks his hips forward into Steve’s stomach involuntarily and a whine escapes his lips. 

The angel leaves one hand grasped over the base of one of Eddie’s wings and traces his fingertips down the bumps in his spine, then down further between the cleft of his ass with the other.

“Oohhh, fuck, Steve–Ah!” Eddie’s hips pitch forward again and his hands tangle themselves into the hair at the back of Steve’s neck, pulling the angel forward to his throat again which he latches onto immediately. 

Steve sucks bruises into Eddie’s neck as he pushes and prods and swirls his finger around his hole. “Relax my love, let me take you, take care of you.”

Eddie nods dumbly, breathing hard, willing himself to relax. He sighs and closes his eyes, rests his forehead against Steve’s once the other man pushes a finger past the ring of muscle.

“Good, good job starlight. You’re so beautiful.” Steve praises as he pumps his finger in and out.

Eddie opens his eyes and looks down at the man below him, though it’s short-lived, as his eyes roll back with yet another groan as Steve adds a second finger.

“That’s it, baby, you take me so well.”

Eddie opens his eyes again, cataloging as much minute detail, every expression that flits across Steve's face as he can while the angel works him open.

The brilliant hazel of his eyes seem to glow around the dark of his pupils, the flush on his face slowly working down his neck to his collarbones; but it’s the look of absolute reverence that has Eddie weak. The angel admires him as if he is some sort of gift. Like Eddie is a breath of fresh air, an ice-cold soda on a hot day, not the broken, unworthy man that’s somehow been graced by a literal angel’s presence.

He knows what his own face must look like, eyes hooded, pupils blown wide, mouth hanging open as he pants with desire, but Steve relishes in it, pulls him in for an open-mouthed kiss as a third finger is pushed in along the other two. Their tongues roll languidly against each other, hot breath changing lungs while Steve works.

“Ah–Steve, sunshine–I’m ready. Please!”

“Of course, Eddie.” Steve sounds like he’s out of breath; he removes his fingers and lifts Eddie easily, lining himself up with his opening.

Eddie pitches backwards as the head of Steve’s cock pushes into him.

“Easy there, darling,” Steve chuckles as he holds Eddie close, “Those things are heavy when you let them relax like that.”

Eddie hums in response, taking a second to figure out what Steve’s talking about. Tilting his head back and looking up, he doesn’t see the dark chocolate brown of his own feathers, so he turns instead. “Ah, there they are.” he says, still feeling boneless.

Steve chuckles, “That they are. Fold them up for me, Eddie, so I can lay you back.”

Eddie’s brain is swimming, but he’s doing his best to make it and his wings cooperate, “Mmmm, want you to, want you to fuck me down into them…” 

A rumbling groan sounds in Steve’s chest “Eddie. Fold them in. Now.” Steve’s impressive wingspan had relaxed somewhere in the last few minutes, but are thrown upwards again as if to emphasize his words.

Just like before, at Steve’s command, Eddie’s body immediately follows the direction. His wings snap in around him and Steve lays him down into plush feathers, pushing further into Eddie at the same time.

They groan in unison. “You are so perfect, so pliant for me.” Steve praises and he starts to move, pulling the most sinful noises from Eddie’s throat as he is fucked into over and over.

“Yes, yes, please don’t stop!” Steve listened to his pleas. He didn’t stop. In fact, he pitched his hips into a slightly different angle, and went in harder and harder, plunging into Eddie so fully and so dead on he was seeing stars.

“Eddie, Eddie…” Steve chants his name in time with Eddie’s moans, “Eddie, I’m–”

-

A sharp pinging alarm wakes him, always set to 7am sharp.

Eddie grumbles some nonsense as he pushes his face farther into the firm mattress, warm where he’d been laying, and reaches to turn off his alarm.

He does, then settles back down fully, swearing to himself that he’s just gonna get a short little snooze in…and turns over to–

“Jesus H. Christ!” Eddie jumps so high he ends up on the rough carpet, looking up at the man sitting on the opposite side of his bed.

“Good morning, Eddie.” Steve turns his head and smiles down at him on the floor. “What were you dreaming about?”

Steve looks pointedly down to Eddie’s lap.

He looks down at himself, “Oh shit,” He snatches up the discarded comforter from Wayne’s bed to cover himself, a wet spot on his boxers making the fabric stick to his skin. “Fuck, I’m just gonna…” He trails off, hopping up and grabbing whatever clothes he can find and darting into the bathroom to the sounds of Steve’s muffled laughter 

He changes quickly, his base layer being almost exactly what he was wearing yesterday thanks to Stevie cleaning them up like he did after dealing with that ghost. He leaves the small bathroom and grabs one of Wayne’s flannels from his duffel. 

“Looks like Wayne got up before us.”

“He did, he asked if we wanted anything when he left.”

“Eh, he knows what I like.” Eddie shrugs.

The pair sit in silence for a few moments before Steve breaks it. “I’m sorry I scared you, Eddie.”

‘Yep, totally, that’s the only reason I freaked out. Definitely not because of the crazy sexy dreams I was having about you.’ Eddie thinks to himself.

“No worries, Big Boy, I’m just not used to waking up to someone in my bed.” If that ain’t the truth. He clears his throat, “I normally talk in my sleep, I didn’t say anything embarrassing did I?”

“Only some groaning.” Steve shrugs to himself.

He lets out a relieved breath. “Good, that’s good.”

“Oh, wait,” Steve snaps his fingers (“Oh no…”). “You did say ‘Yes, yes, please don’t stop!’.” 

Steve throws him a shit-eating grin but before Eddie can sputter out a single decibel, the sound of a key jiggling in the room lock snaps him up to his feet to grab the knob.

“Oh no you don’t, do the knock!” he calls, shoulder pressed against the door to keep it closed.

Eddie hears Wayne’s exasperated sigh through the thin door, but their decided pattern of a knock is tapped out and he opens the door.

Wayne steps through with a bag of take out from the nearby fast food joint. “Thought for sure you'd still be out cold. Eddie’s got a habit of snoozing five too many times.” Wayne directs the last at Steve, who chuckles in response.

Eddie just rolls his eyes, “Bullies. The both of you.” he points at the greasy bag in Wayne’s hand “Now gimme some of that so I’m not dying of hunger when we meet this Dustin kid.”

>:) Part 4 here!

@undreaming-rambles, @potentialheartofdarkness, @munsonfamilyband, @evix-syne666

#steddie #destiel #destiel!steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #nancy wheeler #wayne munson #robin buckley #castiel #dean winchester #sam winchester #bobby singer #stranger thing #st #st ficlet #st fic #stranger things supernatural au #spn au #st spn au #noelle writes

[educatedinyellow]

Theme: Rec a fic that starts with the same letter as your username.

I spotted this rec theme on another blog and it sounded charmingly random and fun! I had a good time looking through my bookmarks and sorting out this little collection of mismatched seashells :)

Every Man's Got a Right by MollyC (SPN, Destiel, Endverse!Cas, time travel, 78K, E) In this one, Endverse!Cas is given a second chance to stop the world, and the people he loves, from going irretrievably off the rails -- he finds himself, without explanation, dropped straight into Season 2 and the first outbreak of the Croatoan virus. Watching him rediscover just how much Dean means to him and how far he's willing to go in order to change things for the better is beautiful. (Written in first-person, for those for whom that is a deal-breaker. It really shouldn't be, though!)

Everybody's Got a Hungry Heart by PallasPerilous (SPN, Destiel, musician!AU, 18K, T) Distinguished by Pallas's inimitable comedy-prose, this thing is an unhinged delight from start to finish. Dean is jumpy as shit. Why one possibly Icelandic beep-boop specialist has him on edge while Mick Jagger’s own vocal coach barely got his heart rate over 55bpm is a goddamn mystery. Maybe it’s the harp solos from that sample track; maybe Dean’s nervous that this is his last shot and if this guy can’t save Dean from filling out the back end of his contract with “Best Of” and “Live In Concert” compilations he might as well walk into the fucking sea.

Engineering 101 by Mara (Batman, Dick Grayson, early days, 4K, G) A clever use of extended metaphor to take a look at the process by which Bruce trains the first child he raises to be Robin and begins to realize what he risks breaking. (I'd say it largely embraces comic book logic in that it does not try to critique the whole premise of child crime fighting as an essentially bad thing, but it sprinkles in traces of real-life concerns. It doesn't vilify Bruce, but it does add some shades of gray to the creation of the dynamic duo.) "Engineering is about testing to destruction," Bruce said, settling into lecture mode. "You don't understand how you can do things better until you understand when and why they break apart."

The Eleventh Hour by Azdak (Man From UNCLE (TV), Napoleon-centric, 4K, G). OK, so, in the TV series there was an episode called 'The Gurnius Affair' wherein Illya had to go undercover as a bad guy, and -- long-story short -- things went wrong, Napoleon got caught, and in order to salvage his own cover and thereby the mission, Illya had to straight-up torture Napoleon. And he did so. Both of them were aware that he had to, both of them were horrified by the experience, and being 1960s television, there was never any adequate follow-up or emotional resolution. A lot of fanfic writers have tackled the aftermath of that disaster in different ways, and this is a fun and interesting take. Napoleon's narrative voice is many things here -- it's petty and angry in a way he rarely is, because his self-image and his pride have been so hurt and he's on ego overdrive here. But it's also wry, and self-dramatizing, and stubborn, and optimistic against all odds. Meanwhile, the narrative commentary of the femme fatale is a load of fun, too. A prickly, funny, angry, and ultimately triumphant brush with death is just what Napoleon needed, it turns out, to settle back into himself.

An Evening of Little Luxuries by otherhawk (MFU, Illya-centric, character study, 7K, G) Oh, I love this one, such a good look at Illya and what it means to him to live between cultures. Before the war he'd been more or less bilingual. He'd grown up speaking Ukrainian at home to his family and Russian everywhere else. After the war there had been no home left, and Russian had been the only language he heard, the language he thought and dreamed in. Now Ukrainian was simply another language he spoke, no different in his head from German or Japanese. His heart was a different matter, and he regretted that loss, regretted that when he dreamed of his parents, his sister, they spoke to him in a language that was no longer his own. Now, more and more, he found himself dreaming in English, and yes, that bothered him. He had no wish to lose Russian the way he'd lost Ukrainian. And so he let himself have evenings like this – the simplest things that felt like decadence – amid his fellow countrymen, many of whom, he suspected, were here for similar reasons.

Escape Velocity by Vehemently (Firefly, Simon Tam, character study, 5K, G) Such concise and vivid world-building, and a poignant look at how Simon grapples with how to accept the loss of the sister he once knew as he takes small, reluctant steps toward facing up to his own over-protectiveness toward the very different person River has now become.

Enduring, Quiet, and Calm by thesardine (BBC Sherlock, Johnlock, strange tenderness, 1K, G) A little gem of a sick fic -- so odd, so sweet. Has that hazy feeling of very late-night exhaustion.

Empty Houses by PlaidAdder (BBC Sherlock, Johnlock, case fic, 45K, T) A clever and involving case fic and the first story to feature PlaidAdder's wonderful take on Harry Watson. Written in that golden moment between Series 2 and Series 3 when we all imagined our own post-Reichenbach reunions and the possibilities for tenderness and healing were still wide open. This fic is rich in humor, compassion, and new beginnings, while also offering a darker take on some bits of canon than the show ultimately pursued.

Elevator Down by vikki (Inception, Arthur & Cobb, LJ fic, 10K, T) I really like this meditation on Arthur's backstory with the Cobbs. Psychologically interesting and elegantly written, and to me there's something touching about the thought that Dom's subconscious keeps lashing out at Arthur because, on some level, he knows it's Arthur who's working hardest to keep him alive. Arthur dreams up paradoxes. Cobb dreams up his late wife. One of these things is not like the other. One of these things is not safe.

Early Returns by rageprufrock (Inception, Arthur/Eames, journalist!AU, 15K, M) Rageprufrock is another author whose comedy-prose is always a pleasure. I love this one for the grouchy journalism malaise in which the embers of inextinguishable principle still smolder, lovingly described as only an insider can <3 For reasons that don't bear discussion, Arthur ends up at Safeway at a 6:30 p.m. on his way home for the night still carrying his messenger bag with his headphones around his neck, standing in one of the aisles looking at 200 different brands of plastic tableware and double-ply picnic dishes. He's been a journalist his entire professional career, so of course he's been this depressed before, but there's something profound when you mix the sinking misery of mortification with the heady, dizzying blur of self-directed fury, and it makes him feel numb down to the fingertips and toes.

If anyone else would like to play this meme, I'd be glad to see your recs!

#fic recs #multifandom #spn #destiel #batman #the man from uncle (tv) #inception #firefly #bbc sherlock #long post