#babes I am in the fucking trenches

[ivymarquis]

How am I supposed to go out into the world and attempt to date, knowing that John Price is a figment of our imaginations and not real. What is even the point

#why cant he be real #i am sobbing I am crying I am screaming #im throwing up #john price #plus like #imma be so real with yall #my local dating pool is just yuppy assholes who think making money is a personality trait #crypto bros #republicans and libertarians #which are diet republicans #like I am a bleeding heart liberal and I have lgbtq family members #i will not be bringing a transphobe home for Christmas it’s not happening #which you’d think thst wouldn’t narrow my dating pool THAT much #but locally????? #babes I am in the fucking trenches #and Im not quite ready to broach dating women irl BUT THEY ARE SO PRETTY #Im just gonna to munches in My Nearest Big City and pray to god I strike gold

[nalgenewhore]

i will make it thru husserl. i will make it thru the cartesian meditations. i will not give up. i will be a master of phenomenology bc it is cool and interesting and for sexy cool interesting people (e.g. me). i actively enjoy the act of studying phenomenology.

#i am in the TRENCHES #husserl sweetheart pls pls pls MAKE UR SENTENCES FUCKING SHORTER. #WHERE TF WAS UR EDITOR BABE ??

[astonmartinii]

into the arms of another part four | max verstappen social media au

pairing: max verstappen x reader

wedding bells are ringing, but so are charles' ears because no one will stop talking about whether he'll make an appearance on the big day

part one | part two | part three | masterlist | tips

yourusername

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yourusername: a night to remember where you don't remember much of it

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user1: how do i become part of this friendship group? real answers only.

maxverstappen1: how do i get to marry HER?

danielricciardo: i ask myself that everyday

maxverstappen1: that's not very girls support girls of you daniel

yourusername: yeah daniel, not being a girl's girl in the summer of barbie, i thought more of you...

danielricciardo: lets not get ahead of ourselves here

user2: y/n and max tag teaming daniel is my favourite thing from this relationship

danielricciardo: tag team? don't give me any ideas

yourusername: DANIEL?

maxverstappen1: DANIEL?

danielricciardo: do NOT pretend that y'all have not thought about it

maxverstappen1: we are getting married in a week do not proposition us for a threesome in a public instagram comment section

user3: max pretending like he's never thought about it

user4: how did we get to this point

yourbff1: threesome talk aside, we're so hot

maxverstappen1: hard agree

yourusername: i love you

yourbff1: i love you too

yourusername: and i love you too

yourbff1: you meant max didn't you ...

yourusername: maybe...

maxverstappen1

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maxverstappen1: this is a public service announcement do NOT let daniel ricciardo plan your stag party because you will not remember a single thing

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user7: the way like 80% of the grid were at this except charles ...

user8: wow colour me shocked he didn't invite the one guy who keeps disrespecting his fiancee to the stag party

danielricciardo: ummmmm this is false? you had a great time.

maxverstappen1: maybe i did all i know is that the bathroom on that plane did not enjoy it i don't think i can touch vodka ever again

danielricciardo: that was all you big boy, you don't know your limit

yourusername: glad to see you didn't kill him before our wedding

danielricciardo: i am really not liking the lack of faith in me

yourusername: he's literally passed out in the second picture daniel

danielricciardo: he's just taking a snooze RIGHT @maxverstappen1

maxverstappen1: yeah ... i just needed my beauty sleep

yourusername: erm you don't need any beauty sleep pretty boy

maxverstappen1: oh, why thank you 😊

user9: she's literally marrying you babe and ur STILL BLUSHING WHEN SHE CALLS YOU PRETTY

user10: this is really not a good sign for charles attending the wedding

user11: yall ever get tired of bringing this shit up HE FUCKED UP this is merely the consequences of his own actions.

user12: and according to mr. leclerc him and max aren't friends so why would he be invited?

danielricciardo

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danielricciardo: max is currently passed out on my shoulder after talking for an hour straight about how much he loves y/n so here's my favourite pictures of them before they're officially married.

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user13: why am i actually dead ass crying over this?

user14: no cause the circumstances have been an actual shit show so i'm glad they've managed to get through it and are finally gonna tie the knot !!

user15: i've been in the literal trenches defending y/n and this relationship i deserve an invite to this wedding

yourusername: @maxverstappen1 omg we're so hot

maxverstappen1: i think you're the hot one babe

yourusername: you're literally the hottest man in the world STOP TALKING DOWN ON YOURSELF

maxverstappen1: i know, i know. i'm amazing, sexy and beautiful.

yourusername: TOO RIGHT

user16: is this ^^ positive affirmations

yourusername: yes, he's way too amazing to not believe that himself

user17: so like do they maybe want to adopt me?

landonorris: so as the sexiest groomsmen, can i have the scoop on whether there'll be any sexy bridesmaid

maxverstappen1: who said you're the sexiest?

landonorris: well since charles is out of the running there's a clear winner here - ME

danielricciardo: assuming the best man is not in this conversation cause my face card clears yours

user18: WAIT WHAT

user19: so it's confirmed, he's missing his best friend's wedding over him being petty, all hope in men is gone

yourusername

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yourusername: no words. love of my life. best day ever. i love you forever maxy

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user25: OMFG IT LOOKS SO BEAUTIFUL

fernandoalo_oficial: a really beautiful ceremony for my favourites, enjoy your honeymoon and make some time for the old man

yourusername: thank you for coming fernando and thank you for the literal snowmobile idk what we'll do with it but thank you

user26: what kind of a wedding gift is a SNOWMOBILE?

maxverstappen1: a sick one? thanks nando

danielricciardo: what a wonderful day, you guys are so perfect together, thank you for letting me be a part of your day

maxverstappen1: HE CRIED AHAHAHHAHAAHA HE LOVES US SO MUCH HE CRIED

danielricciardo: ummm obviously i watched you pine over her for as long as i've known you. you guys deserve this happiness after everything

yourusername: daniel we love you and your speech was so amazing i nearly cried all of my makeup off

user27: the way the old charles would've given such a banging speech i am in mourning

user28: girl it's their literal wedding post leave the comments about charles for once

sebastianvettel: lovely ceremony you too, much love to your future - seb, hanna and the kids xx

yourusername: thank you for coming seb !! love you guys, let us know if you want us to babysit

maxverstappen1: thank you for your support through all of this seb, you guys are the best

user29: so charles really got no one in his corner lol

maxverstappen1

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maxverstappen1: in sickness and in health, the biggest honour of my life is being your husband

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user30: this is my barbie this does not get any better for me

christianhorner: a wonderful ceremony for the loveliest couple, very grateful to be included in your special day.

masverstappen1: thank you for being there for me, and for not standing on y/n's dress with your two left feet

user31: yall gonna give any context?

user32: i think he's referring to the fact that christian filled the role jos would have at the wedding and during the parents dance, christian would've had a dance with y/n !!

user31: i think my heart just melted wedding of the century

user33: seeing all the wedding content without charles is so weird the whole time we've known y/n her and charles were attached at the hip :/

user34: i beg yall leave it out for one day, he could've been there HE HAD THE INVITATION but he didn't so leave it out

redbullracing: officially THE f1 couple 🫶

landonorris: congratulations and all that jazz but WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT PUNCH

yourusername: sorry lando i gave them the uni recipe

landonorris: oscar was sick on my shoes MY BEAUTIFUL SHOES

maxverstappen1: just send us the bill i can hear you bitching from our room

oscarpiastri: for the record THEY sat me next to kimi and seb and i tried to aim away from your shoes but the world was spinning

user35: okay i need to know the seating plan for this wedding ASAP

excerpt of the podcast interview of y/n y/ln-verstappen.

yourusername

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yourusername: my honeymoooooooooooooon with my super sexy and lovely HUSBAND

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user36: okay i've had enough of the cute posts WHERE IS MY HUSBAND?

user37: i crack myself up thinking about them setting up a lil tripod to take these

yourusername: and?

maxverstappen1: we're serving cunt x

user38: did yall see y/n's podcast interview?

user39: yes i'm glad she's got her closure now and can fully move on with her life

alexalbon: you guys are so sickeningly sweet i love you morons

yourusername: why thank you alex

lilymunhe: he said he deserves compensation for his half a season of listening to max pine

maxverstappen1: people think i'm embarrassed of that when LOOK AT MY WIFE OBVIOUSLY I WOULD PINE

maxverstappen1: and bro your apology was the open bar at the wedding

alexalbon: you guys are underestimating just how much this guy spoke about y/n

yourusername: fine we'll post in our albon shoes

albon_pets: this is why we love you y/n

user39: no charles comment... you hear that? peace.

note: i hope yall enjoyed this probably final part of into the arms of another. i hope it wasn’t disappointing lol i love this pairing with all my heart. (also wrote this at 4am on my couch after a MASSIVE FUCK OFF house spider came in my room (my dad said he killed it when i woke him up at 2am) but i was too scared to stay) xx

#f1 #f1 x you #f1 instagram au #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen instagram au #max verstappen x you #max verstappen x reader #into the arms of another #astonmartinii

[ooffies]

PLEASE. THIRD YEARS WITH A THICC GIRL. MAKE IT SPICY *WINK WINK*

I am insane. I belong in the trenches for this one. Thank you for the request and I hope you enjoy!

°•☆•°°•☆•°°•☆•°°•☆•°°•☆•°°•☆•°

Gimme All Your Love!

❥─➤ Characters: Trey, Cater, Leona, Rook, Vil, Idia, Lilia & Malleus x midsized/thick fem!reader (separate)

❥─➤ warnings: SMUT (18+) READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. masturbation (Cater), creampie, unprotected sex, oral, breeding kink (Malleus and Leona), semi-public sex (Lilia and Trey), being horny lol (Idia and Cater), mirror sex (Rook), teasing, not proof read & kinda cringe ngl (there is a lot so please let me know if I missed anything!)

Trey Clover

Always loved a thick girl. Trey has always known his type and that he prefers them thick. He’s always so gentle and caring when he’s fucking you raw. Loves doing it doggy style so he can see your ass jiggle as he rams his cock into you. If you haven’t guessed Trey loves your ass, he’ll grope it, smack it, leave bruises, bites and red hand marks all over it. But as much he loves teasing you (also being a lowkey sadist tbh) Trey is still very gentle with you when you two are being intimate. His large hands will hold you softly and his lips gently trailing kisses on the most sensitive parts of your body. His hands roaming every inch of your soft body. Trey knows exactly what to do to make you feel good and he knows exactly were and how to touch you. He will always ask if you’re feeling comfortable and if the pace is good. Trey is there to pleasure you and make you feel good (also to stuff you with is cock but he’ll never out right say that). A lot of praise with him too, he can’t name one negative thing about your body, he loves it all. 

You felt so warm around him, your ass giving him the greatest view as he fucked you from behind. He felt a smile tug at his lips as he moved his hands lower on your soft hips. “Are you feeling alright babe?” he asked, adding an almost innocent yet teasing tone to his voice. He laughed a bit when all you could reply with was a moan. He leaned down, without breaking his pace, a placed a quick kiss on the back of your neck. Your breasts were squished against the cold kitchen counter, a sight that Trey really liked to see. It was in the late hours of the night, yours and his midnight baking session had turned from sweet to spicy. Not the he minded though, he’ll take any excuse to fuck you. His tone now soft and sweet like honey he said, “Let me know if I’m being to rough love. You doing so well, I’m almost done” Once again all he heard was you moan but this time it was his name. This inspired to him to go faster, putting in a few rough final thrust before he released in you. He slowly turned you to faced him, placing a sweet kiss to your cheek and lifting you in his arms, “Let me clean you up babe, the tarts can wait”

Cater Diamond

Horny ass number one. Curvy girls make his junk twitch. On his motherfucking knees for you. Let him smother his face in your titties. Daydreams about you and your body 24/7. A single dirty thought about you makes him instantly hard. Probably jerks off to you like 3 times a day. He’s so weak for you it’s kinda pathetic but in the most babygirl way possible. He’s really fucking noisy everytime y’all fuck, moaning and whimpering your name as he holds onto your thighs for dear life. Loves giving you hickeys but if you give them to him, he’ll be a mess in your arms. Even though doesn’t mean he won’t fuck you like his life depends on it. 

He felt his dick harden against his pants. God all you did was sit on his lap and now here is, bricked up and begging for you to fuck him. Well he wasn’t begging out loud, it was more like he was pleading with his eyes. But he knew you couldn’t because Trey has asked you to help him out with the preparations for the next unbirthday party. He watched you leave with Trey, cursing himself for being so easily turned on by you. He grunted as he locked the door to his room and fumbled with his belt buckle at the same time. He wasted no time whipping his dick out and thinking about you. Your thighs, ass, tits, tummy were all so beautiful. The way your tits bounced up and down the last time he fucked you, the way you moan his name, oh god-. Just as he finished he heard the sound of the door creak open. Apparently his mutli tasking didn’t work. There you stood, staring at him with your eyebrow cocked up, this wasn’t the first time this has happened. “Hey baby….” He said with an awkward smile, not even removing his hands from his dick, “Um.. would you mind helping me out..?” You sighed, letting out a little laugh while giving him a small head shake in a playful disappointed manner. You made sure to lock the door properly this time before making your way over to him. He smiled, he knew you couldn’t say no to him.

Leona Kingscholar

Who doesn’t love a thick woman? Your soft, comfortable and your hips serve as the perfect handles when he pounds you. Loves, loves, loves leaving bite marks all over your body. Your boobs, tummy, thighs and neck will be covered in hickeys when he’s done with you. Also don’t forget the scratch marks, your back, hips and thighs will be covered in them. Leona has the most energy you’ve ever seen him have when he fucks you. He goes wild when fucking you and doesn’t hold back at all. Good luck walking the next day. But….that doesn’t mean he won’t be a total needy, whiney bottom if he feels like it. If he isn’t coming on you, he is coming on you. Especially your thighs and tummy. Borderline breeding kink but not as bad as Malleus. Once he’s done with you he will immediately fall asleep, using you as a pillow and taking extreme comfort in your softness.

Your hips snapped against his violently, one of his palms digging deep into your plush hips as the other covered the whimpers coming out of his mouth. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes as he tried to stifle his moans more, looking at you smirking above him. He has been at the top just a few moments and now he’s a whiney mess under you. Only you can do that to him. His hair was a mess, he had drool coming from the corner of his mouth and god did he feel pathetic. But he absolutely loved it. His second flew to cover his mouth as you started picking up the pace. The tears started to stream down his face. You made him feel so good. He finally cummed, feeling all the energy he had before drained from his body. He felt himself going limp as you leaned down and placed a kiss on his forehead before positioning yourself next to him, guiding his head to rest against your chest. He fell asleep almost instantly in your soft embrace, muttering something about how you better not tease him tomorrow about being so whiny. But deep down both of you knew that you would.

Rook Hunt

Always loved a thick girl number two. Just like Trey Rook always had known what type of woman he preferred. He will muse about your body every time he fucks you, praising your softness and beauty. But he will fuck you so carnally you’ll start seeing stars. Let him make you feel good, please. He’ll do anything to hear you moan his name. He is insane (just like me fr). He may have you seeing stars but the only thing he’s seeing is your beautiful body. A big fan of mirror sex because he loves making sure you see every part of your body as he slowly runs his slender fingers along your skin, he just wants you to know how lovely you are. Not to repeat myself but nothing but praise leaves this man's mouth when y’all are fucking. Even if he is pounding into you he won’t stop talking about how every curve, stretch mark and dip of your body is pure perfection.  

Your reflection in the mirror seemed like a painting come to life. Rook hummed against your neck, his chin leaning on your shoulder as his fingers danced around your pussy, occasionally pinching your exposed clit. He once again looked in the mirror, admiring your naked form that he handled with such care. You were sitting on his lap, your legs opened wide and your thighs spread apart, exposing your sex to him and one of his arms hooked under your soft breasts. One of his slender hands began to toy with your nipple as the other continued to play with your pussy, now two of his fingers now rubbing up and down your slit. His eyes turned back to the mirror, watching your face make subtle changes every time he touched you in the right spot. “Ahhh comme c'est beau!” he mused. His fingers lifting from your breast to your chin, making you look at your reflection. “Oh mon dieu, just look at how gorgeous you are! All exposed and pretty for moi” he hummed. He was having such a good time. With every labored breath and soft moan you let out he could feel his dick growing even tighter against his pants. He let out another amused hum as his fingers dipped into you, feeling you clench around them. One of your hands dipped down to rub circles on your clit as the other stay draped over his neck. He turned your face towards him, connecting his lips to yours. Before slipping his tongue in he muttered “Personne ne me fait ressentir la façon dont tu fais, mon amour” (Nobody makes me feel the way you do, my love)

Vil Schoenheit

Didn’t know what he was missing out on. Vil had always been with thinner people, models, other actors, etc. He always thought that was just his type and preference until he met you. You two were just formal acquaintances at first. He didn’t see you much as a romantic interest but one night at a party one thing led to another. Little did Vil know how much he was missing out on until his head got crushed between your thighs while he was eating you out and his dick was straining so hard against his pants it hurt. A switch must have flicked in his brain cause oh lord, he can’t stop thinking about you and your body. He doesn’t care if makeup gets smeared or his hair gets messed up, all he wants is for his head to be crushed by your thighs. A big fan of leaving little love bites and lipstick stains all over you. Especially your titties and thighs. He leaves bruises from how hard he grips onto your soft hips as he fucks you. You revealed a part of him he didn’t even know about, dude becomes a whole ass different person, he will fuck the daylights outta you in the most elegant way possible. He is so whipped for you it's not even funny. Of course, he always makes sure to praise your beauty before, during and after sex. You truly make him feel something he hasn’t felt before and he can’t get enough of it.   

God he was a mess. Him, Vil Schoenheit, an absolute mess. He could feel the lipstick smudge at the corner of his mouth to his cheek. His once knelt braided hair is now coming loose and his bangs sticked to his sweaty forehead. A thin string of saliva connected his mouth to your now puffy clit. He had stopped to take a breath, his breath was heavy and his heart was pounding in his chest. But none of that was what he was focusing on. He was focused on your plushy thighs that were tight around his skull and how hard they were making his dick strain against his pants. God he’s never felt this dirty or turned on before, none of his previous partners have ever made him aroused before. 

“Vil… Are you alright?” His grip tightened on your thighs, feeling almost vice, like he was hanging on for dear life and never intended to let go. A new wave of lust overcame him from hearing your words. God he felt so good right now. Pressing a quick kiss to your clit he said “I’m doing just great darling” Lust dripped from his tone as he recalled your breathy moans and whimpers from just a few moments ago. He didn’t care that he was a horny mess, all he wanted was you.

Idia Shroud

Horny ass number two. He’s fucking nuts for you, and practically drools every time he sees you naked. Likes it when you sit on his lap so his greedy hands can touch and squeeze every part of your body. Cockwarm him while you sit on his lap and watch him become a horny and greedy mess under you. Smother him with your thighs, squash him, crack his fucking skull open and don’t let his ass get a single fucking breath in. Although he is kinda pathetic just like Cater, he can top you when needed. Sometimes, you even forget how tall and big this dude actually is until he has you moaning his name and begging for more. Going off of that, Idia loves it when you're vocal and when you become the moaning, whimpering mess under him. Another big fan of leaving love bites all over your body, especially since his teeth are already naturally sharp. Your tummy, thighs, ass, titties, basically every part of your gorgeous body will be covered in bruises and bite marks when he’s done with you. 

His hands roamed your ass as his face was buried in your titties. You were sitting on his lap, his cock stuffed in you. His breath felt heavy and he felt super light-headed. Did he just unlock the secret ending, was this the special cgi like in all those otome games he’s played!? He shyly peeked up at you from your breasts. Your face looked gorgeous in the blue lighting of his room, your lips a bit puffy from him biting them earlier, the strands of hair stuck to your face and the dazed look in your eyes made his dick twitch. He brought his lips up to your neck and bit down, adding another bite mark to the cluster of them that he made previously. His dick twitched again when you let a breathy moan as he bit down. His hands grabbed your thighs even tighter as his own breath hitched. He couldn’t hold back anymore, if he worked so hard to unlock this special ending he was damn well gonna as much as possible to make you feel good. His hips began thrusting as you pulled him closer, your bare skin on his. He watched as your boobs bounced up and down with every thrust, his bite marks now on full display. He began to grunt as he slowly felt the knot in his stomach tightening. With a breathy moan all he could manage to say was, “I…I love you.” 

Lilia Van Rogue

Thick girl enjoyer since day one. He’s a fucking tease but he is here to give you the best fucking sex of your life. His hands will be constantly roaming over your curves as fingers or fucks you. He’ll be leaving bite marks all over your thighs as he toys with your clit, watching you unravel in front of him. He loves overstimming you, hearing you moan and whine brings him joy (and makes him hard lol). He loves how your eyes roll back and your body twitches as he pushes you past the brink. His favorite to mark by far though is your tummy, it was honestly his favorite body part of yours. Lots and lots of verbal teasing, he calls you greedy and needy and acts oblivious to what you want. He’s also a fan of praise and degradation (depending on your preferences of course) Sit on his face, please. He may be small but he’s strong, also he cannot complain about being crushed by your thighs and pussy. But he loves teasing you in public more than he does in bed. He gets a kick out of your flushed face and how you press your thighs together as if you’re trying to make sure he doesn’t get in. It never works though. But he’ll only ever do things semi-publicly. He likes the possible risk of getting caught, it makes things fun. But don’t worry, you two have never and will never get caught. Probably.

His hand dipped under the waistline of your skirt, his fingers playing with the hem of your pantyline. His free hand was resting on your stomach and he began to plant kisses on your neck. Oh you were so cute when you were nervous and flustered! He had brought you the music club room, he had been teasing you all day and was finally showing you that he wasn’t all talk. It was late of course so it would be highly unlikely that you two would get caught, but he could definitely still see that you were nervous about it which made him feel even more lustful. His fingers finally found their way to right above your clothed clit, his subtle motions had already started to make you wet. He chuckled lightly as his fingers slowly started to move in circles, occasionally pinching your clit so that he could get a gasp or a hitched breath out of you. His kisses slowly start to turn into bites as he sits you down onto a nearby desk, moving himself on in front of you. He hastily begins to unbutton your shirt, unclasping your bra in one swift motion with a singular hand. He lifts up his head and smirks at the sight of your now bare chest and tummy, his finger traces along one of your stretch marks and he moves his fingers faster against your clit. He started to place a chaste kiss on each of your stretch marks, slowly making his way down from the ones on your titties to the ones on your tummy. He stops right at your waistline, looking up at you with mischievous glint in his eyes as he removes his fingers from your clit just as you were about to cum. He loved that glare you shot whenever he denied you. He chuckled again, raising back up to be eye level with you, “Being greedy now aren’t we hm? Oh darling you are always so needy when it comes to me~” he teased placing his finger back on your clit, “If we go fast then it’ll be no fun~”   

Malleus Draconia

He's a cream king (sorry not sorry). Malleus, oh Malleus. He is so feral for you. His whole life has been set up with people by suggestion of his grandmother or other nobles of Briar Valley. He has only been with those types of people, never having much intimacy and never being able to be romantic. Until he met you. The moment he laid eyes on you he felt an unknown desire well up within him. You make him feel ways he’s never experienced before (aka you make him hard). Whenever y’all are fucking he lets pure desire take over. Will you be able to walk in the morning after he's done with you? Nope. But of course he is a gentleman and will take care of you. Malleus loves your body, he wants to feel and mark every inch of it. Expect a lot of cum with this guy. A lot on you and a pretty decent amount on you. Yes, he's a bit aggressive while he pounds into you but he just really, really, really likes stuffing you full of his cum. Surprisingly, he is much more of a kisser than a biter. His mouth is always connected to yours or a part of your body (your titties)  while gripping your plush hips, leaving them a bit bruised. But when his mouth isn’t on you he is praising your body. Indulging in your plushness, curves, and especially your soft tummy. He loves your tummy. He doesn’t care if it has stretch marks or cellulite, he will be praising your beauty as creams inside you, talking about how he’ll impregnate you and make you his and only his forever.

His nose felt hot in the crook of your neck, his tongue danced on your skin as his lips connected with it. His waist caught between your thick thighs as his hands gripped your soft hips with such force that they would surely leave nail marks later. He thrust into you, making sure that each thrust was strong and quicker than the last. Is this the fourth time he came? The fifth? He didn’t care to keep an exact count, all that mattered was that he was cumming in you. Your moans and mewls only made him more determined to fuck you like there was no tomorrow. He groaned loudly as he released you, his head slowly lifting from your neck, his eyes now level with yours. He took in your gorgeous face, beads of sweat caused your soft hair to stick to it, your eyes pricked with tears and your cheeks were still stained with tears from before. Oh you were so beautiful to him, no one could ever match you in his eyes. He smiled and slowly lowered his lips to yours, placing a soft kiss on them before slowly leaning back so that he was looking down on you even more than before. He placed his large hand on your soft tummy, running his thumb along it while it admired it. Then he began pounding into you again, hands once again on your hips to steady himself, his carnal desire growing even more. “My love, there is no better sight than seeing you full of me.”

© ooffies 

Please do not repost or translate my work without permission and credit. Thank you!

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst headcanons #twst smut #twst wonderland #twst x reader #twst trey #trey clover #trey clover x reader #twst cater #cater diamond #twst leona #leona kingscholar #leona kingsholar x reader #cater diamond x reader #twst rook #rook hunt #rook hunt x reader #twst vil #vil schoenheit #vil schoenheit x reader #twst lilia #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader #twst malleus #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader

[megu-nya]

★·.·´ LET'S TAKE THIS BACK TO MY STUDIO `·.·★

★ ¦ ft: reo mikage :: rin itoshi :: yoichi isagi

★ ¦ tw: nsfw :: fem!reader :: cam girl!reader :: implied pro-player!rin :: kinda possessive!rin

★·.·´ REO MIKAGE `·.·★

He's always been your most genouros donator, giving you hundreds after hundreds and that every single one of your streams. It always seemed like he was somewhat obsessed with you, always being the first one to buy special pictures or videos you put up for sale, donating even more money in the next stream, telling you how pretty you looked in that lingerie.

And since he had always been like that you thought about a special gift for him — an irl meet up. So you opened your DM's and clicked on his profile, telling him the good news. It didn't even take a minute until he responded, immediately agreeing to the meet up under the condition he can buy you stuff from a lingerie and sex shop that you two will later on try out. Even though this was supposed to be a gift for him, all he could think about was spending money on you.

The day of the meet up came and for some reason you were nervous as hell, it wasn't the first time you met up with one of your followers, so why are your nerves on the edge right now?

"You are Reo, right?", you asked, approaching a purple haired man with trench coat that exactly fitted the description he gave you of himself. "Ah, y-yea, I am", he responded, cheeks taking on a rosy tint as he saw you, the dress you've been wearing sitting tight and hugging your features nicely. "Shall we?", you said, intertwining your arm with his as you two started to make your way into the mall.

"Wow, Reo! You're always spending so much one me, I can't tell you how thankful I am!", you told him as you looked through all the things he had bought you in the span of a few hours, sitting on your bed, admiring the purple lace lingerie you held in your hand, the purple haired man sitting on the bed as well, his body tense and stiff as he eyed your every movement.

"So, uhm", he began to say, breaking the silence between the two of you, swallowing hard as he felt your eyes on him. "Oh, yes! My bad", you chuckled, getting off of the bed and placing yourself in between his legs, stroking his crotch, able to feel his dick getting harder with every touch of yours. "Now let me spoil you, okay?"

★·.·´ RIN ITOSHI `·.·★

You chuckled as you could see your chat going wild, message after message getting spammed, the chat window bugging every so often. "As you can see, today, I am not alone. I brought someone who's very dear to me with me. He'll help me so you better donate even more money, it's not all day that you can see me getting fucked by an actual man", you told your viewers as you sat down on the hard on of Rin, a mewl escaping your mouth at the painful yet pleasurable stretch he gave you.

When you started dating Rin he was shocked to find out you make a living by posting porn on the Internet, but once he saw how much you actually made a month he became somewhat okay with it. As long as he's not around he didn't mind it but when you two moved together it became more and more frequently for him to be at home when you "worked". And today he wasn't okay with it at all.

"Ah, Rin!", you moaned, the chat going even wilder upon hearing you say the name of the mysterious mans dick you were bouncing on right now. In order to protect your boyfriend you placed the camera so that only everything from chest downwards could be seen of Rin, after all he was a pro player, you didn't want him to get exposed and land in the newspaper. "Just like that babe, keep saying my name", he whispered, those words only audible for you, too quiet for the microphone of the camera to be recognised.

His hands found their way onto your waist, grabbing it harshly, nails digging into your flesh, leaving marks for the next day. With his strong grib he halted your movements, making it unable for you to keep bouncing on him. In a swift movement he manhandled you to change positions, finding yourself now on all fours and Rin positioned behind you, pistoning his dick back into your tight and warm hole, picking up a merciless pace from the start.

"Rin -ah! the- the camera! They can't see my -ah! my face!", you said in between an endless string of moans, words falling onto deaf ears. "It's better like that", he grunted into your ear as he leaned over. "They shouldn't be allowed to see how pretty your fucked out face looks like, only I can", he said, punctiuating every few words with an even harsher thrust of his hips, the coil in your stomach getting tighter and tighter with every time his head hit your cervix.

★·.·´ YOICHI ISAGI `·.·★

"And the winner is...", you said, fondling in the little satin bag you were holding, grabbing onto one of the paper snippets and pulling it out, unfolding it and reading the words written on it outload. "Yo-1-Ichi! Congratulations! You have won the video call lottery!", you exclaimed, a big and bright smile adorning your face as you watched everyone in chat complaining that they didn't win the unique chance to have a video call with you.

On the other side of the screen sat Yoichi, his heart pounding heavily, cheeks and ears covered in a dark red hue. He couldn't believe what was happening right now. He had followed you since your debut, never missing any of your streams and donating as often as his ridiculously low salary would allow it. Of course he immediately applied for the Video Call Lottery once you announced it. Even if he didn't win, it was worth a shot. But now that he won, he couldn't believe his own two ears and eyes as you showed the paper with his user name into the camera to show you weren't lying.

"Well then, my dear darlings, I will go off now. See you to the next stream!", you said, turning off your camera and ending the stream, Yoichi's screen darkening, your typical "See You Soon!" header adorning it now. The blue haired male practically jumped and let his phone fall onto his bed when he felt it vibrate, a message from you popping up on his screen. With shaky hands he picked up his phone from the mattress, unlocking it and opening the DM you have sent him.

Yoichi was nervous as hell the whole time the two of you chatted, fingers trembling and shaking with every words he typed with his keyboard, often making spelling mistakes he hoped you wouldn't notice. It didn't take long for the two of you to agree on a date and time for the video call - because Yoichi wanted it now. No. He needed it now. He gulped down the knot in his throat when he picked up the call. "I'll get changed real quick!", you said, putting your phone down on your bed, screen going black.

You were quick to change into a set of dark blue lingerie, like he requested you to do, picking up the phone, laying on your bed and angling it so he could see you kept your promise. "You look stunning", he almost whispered when he saw the lace adorning your breasts, leaving little to his imagination. "Thank you", you chuckeled, a slight blush creeping onto your face. "Shall we start then?"

2023 © megu-nya — all rights reserved. do not repost, copy, translate, modify or plagiarize in any form.

#bllk smut #blue lock smut #reo mikage #mikage reo #rin itoshi #itoshi rin #yoichi isagi #isagi yoichi #reo mikage smut #mikage reo smut #rin itoshi smut #itoshi rin smut #yoichi isagi smut #isagi yoichi smut #reo mikage x reader #reo mikage x you #mikage reo x reader #mikage reo x you #rin itoshi x reader #rin itoshi x you #itoshi rin x reader #itoshi rin x you #yoichi isagi x reader #yoichi isagi x you #isagi yoichi x reader #isagi yoichi x you #bllk x reader #bllk x you #blue lock x reader #blue lock x you

[taylortruther]

The way almost EVERY single line in YLM can be related to a previous like she wrote about Joe is INSANE. Like YLM is basically the song that would most fit the theme of Midnights (reflecting on the past and integrating it into the present) and guess what? She left it out (for reasons that I understand).

Here we go;

You say I don't understand and I say I know you don't// Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other

We thought a cure would come through in time now I fear it won't// I thought the plane was goimg down, how'd you turn it right around?

Remember looking at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light...now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time// The entirety of Daylight duh

Remember looking at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light...now I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time// The entirety of Daylight duh

Do I throw out everything we built or keep it //I am an architect I'm drawing up the plans (I'm reaching here I know)

I'm getting tired even for a phoenix always rising from the ashes // I am ash from your fire

Mending all her gashes // is this the end of all the endings, my broke bones are mending

You might just have dealt the final blow // Darling this was just as hard as when they pulled me apart (these two lines feel so similar to me)

Stop you're losing me (I hope I never lose you) I can't find a pulse my heart won't start anymore// he got my heartbeat skipping down 16th avenue

Every morning I glared at you with storms in my eyes// after the storm something was born on the 4th of July

How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dying// There's many different ways that you can kill the one you love, the slowest way is never loving them enough

I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick // I gave SO MANY SIGNS

My face was GREY but you wouldn't admit that we were sick // I don't like anticipating my face in a RED flush (I could write an essay about just this grey/red parallel but nvm)

And the air is thick with loss and indecision//clearing the air I breathed in the smoke

I know my pain is such an imposition // You don't really read into my melancholia // Always taking up too much space or time // I'm not your problem anymore

Now you're running down the hallway // I heard your key turn in the door down the hallway // You were standing hollow eyed in the hallway

And you know what they all say "you don't know what you've got until it's gone" // he better lock it down or I won't stick around 'cause good ones never wait

How long could we be a sad song // each bar plays our song

Till we were too far gone to bring back to life // Do I really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?

I gave you all my best mes, my endless empathy // I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best// After giving you the best I had, tell me what to give after that?

And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier // All the bloodshed, crimson clover // And if I bleed you'll be the last to know // soldier down on that icy ground

Fighting in only your army // I'd sit with you in the trenches

Frontlines don't you ignore me // I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me

I'm the best thing at this party // best believe I'm still bejeweled when I walk in the room, I can still make the whole place shimmer

And I wouldn't marry me either // She would've made a lovely bride // I'd marry you with paper rings // all they keep asking me is if I'm gonna be your bride // the entire bridge of Lover

A pathological people pleaser // what a shame she's fucked in the head // mirrorball tm // my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism

Who only wanted you to see her // Walking with his head down, I'm the one he's walking to

And I'm fading thinking DO SOMETHING BABE // Some boys are trying too hard he don't try at all though

SAY SOMETHING // You don't ever say too much

LOSE SOMETHING BABE RISK SOMETHING // this ain't for the best

CHOOSE SOMETHING BABE I'VE GOT NOTHING TO BELIEVE // stood on the cliffside screaming "give me a reason"

i have nothing intelligent to say but I LOVE THIS, let's discuss

#ylm

[seas-storyarchive]

A what if of my story Down In The Trenches. More specifically, the arrival of my Radiorose kid: Alice.

Note: pre-established Radiorose, has oc

[[MORE]]

Rosie arrived at the Hotel as soon as she got the news from Charlie - Alastor was stabbed, weak, having a long wound across his chest.

She came over with a medical bag, full of supplies. Going right to work, saving pleasantries. Charlie had moved a few more first aid kits into Alastor's room, as instructed.

She put a leather strap in his mouth for him to bite, trying to tune out his cries as she wroked on him. It took hours - cleaning, disinfecting, stitching, pausing, saying sweet nothings, bandaging. And trying not to cry.

"Ro-ss-sie.." his voice was so weak, him speaking after she removed the strap, when she finished her bandaging him up.

"I'm here, doll." She pet his hair, smiling. "You did pretty good. All things considered."

"S- stay." He pleaded, tears in his eyes from feeling the burning.

Rosie nodded, moving her hand to cup his face, "I don't plan on it, silly boy." She leaned down to kiss him gently.

Alastor let out a soft "hm" as he leaned against her hand.

"I'll use the intercom to let them know you're alright." Rosie said, kissing him again.

"Okay.." Alastor said softly, disappointed.

"Needy boy. Stay." Rosie said with a smile as she stood up. She went to the intercom, pressing the button to speak with the main floor.

"Rosie? How is he?" Eager to hear the news, wow, she must be worried.

"He's fine, Charlie sweetie." Rosie said with a smile. "I'll be stayin' the night ta keep an eye on him."

"Okay. I'll have some dinner brought up." Charlie said with a smile.

--

That night, they held each other tight and cried.

"Why did you do it, you fucking idiot!" Rosie moved back to look at his face.

Alastor chuckled, tears falling down his face, "I don't know, darling. I.. I guess I couldn't let our chums have a laugh without me."

Rosie kissed him harshly, "was it worth it, you jerk?"

Alastor whimpered in paid, panting as the broke for air, "well, I'm in your hands.. so yes."

"Easy there.. Al. You're still hurting, it's too soon." Rosie said.

Alastor sighed, frowning, "fine.." he held her arms. "Just, lay in my arms alright?"

Rosie reached a hand up to touch his cheek again. "I will, just promise you won't die in mine tonight."

"I won't, I have the best nurse in all of the underworld here with me." Alastor smiled at her.

Rosie laughed softly, kissing him again. Her tears rolled down her face, dropping onto his bandaged chest.

They called it a night, for real this time, holding each other.

There was the sound of screaming that woke Rosie up the next morning.

"Al.." She touched his chest blindly, still asleep, to which he made a weak noise.

"Your alarm.." Rosie said as another round of screaming started.

"I don't have one. Maybe i's your phone.."

"Turned mine off b'fore I worked on you. I's still off."

The screaming wouldn't stop.

"Okay, that's it.." Alastor sat up, feeling pain ripping through him, and seeing what he was seeing - he turned to her a bit too fast. "R- Rosie.."

"What?" Now she was annoyed. He was up, but the screaming wouldn't stop.

"Wa-wake up." Alastor said softly. "Wake up!" He whisper shouted.

"What?" Rosie sat up, glaring at him. When she saw his face, she followed where he was glancing at out of the orner of his eyes. To the end of the bed.

There lay a wee, naked babe. A little baby girl. A little faun, crying where she lay.

Rosie took another moment, before she moved to scoop up the girl, wrapping her in the blanket at the end of the bed, before bringing her to the head of the bed while rocking her to calm her.

"Look at her, Al." Rosie looked from the baby to Alastor.

Alastor nodded. "I.. I am." He took a breath. "She.." his eyes went from the babe to Rosie.

"Looks like you." Rosie smiled.

"Like you too." Alastor said with a smile.

"What are we going to do with her? How did she even get here?" Rosie asked.

Alastor shrugged. "Hm.. I don't know. Wishful thinking?"

"What?" Rosie was flabbergasted.

"Well, I regretted not having children while alive but, well.."

"Your murders, I know." Rosie said to him. "I was thinking about it too, but, well you know.."

Unable to have children in life. Thus barren in death.

"What if.. what if this is our chance?" Alastor asked after a few minutes of the two tickling the baby's cheeks and feeling her ears, smiling at her laughter.

"How close to ya second death are you?" Rosie asked him.

"You saw last night." Alastor said, looking to her with a smile. "But, think about it - you and I had wanted children, I nearly die to a holy weapon, and then," he moved his hands to make jazz hands, "baby."

Rosie sighed. "You have a point."

After a moment, Alastor asked, "so.. what are we going to do with her?"

"Raise her?" Rosie asked in a manner indicating she was intent on doing this alone if she had to.

Alastor smiled. "Perfect. Well, what shall we name our little girl?"

Rosie smiled at him. "What's the name of that book you like?"

"Alice in Wonderland, why?"

"Curiosity. I needed a girl name, and honestly.. that one sounds perfect."

Alastor hummed, mulling it over. "I like it too." He smiled. "Let's give her the middle name of May."

"Are you serious?" Rosie asked Alastor, shifting their babe as she reached for Alastor.

"I think she likes it too." Alastor said, reaching over to take the baby. When he held her, something in him felt complete.

"Alice May Hunt-Dupuis."

Rosie stopped adjusting her hair to look at the man. "Your last name is French?"

Alastor lowered Alice a little to glare at her playully. "Rosie, darling, I'm a Creole from Louisiana. Of course my last name is French."

"Are you fuckin' kidding me?"

"No." Alastor said to her.

Well, bathing and dressing the kid was fun. As was bringing her downstairs.

"What da fuq is even dat!"

"A baby."

"No shit, Smiles. I mean, what da fuq is you two doin' with it?"

"Oooh! Here, I'll order everything you guys need!" Charlie said, and went ahead ordering with Rosie and Vaggie giving commentary.

"We were given her as a gift." Rosie said. "For some reason."

"Hmm.." Lucifer looked at the girl, only to get kicked in the eye. "Ow!" He put a hand over his eye. "Yup, that's Antlers' kid alright! Born of you two wanting a kid, I'm assuming, and from what I can guess is whatever the fuck took Antlers out of commission."

"Adam's ridiculously tacky axe." Alastor said with a grimace.

"What's her name? I want to get her stuff with her name on it." Charlie was grinning.

Alastor and Rosie looked at each other with a smile.

"Alice May Hunt-Dupuis." They said together with a smile.

"Perfect! Now we have to wait." Charlie said with a smile. "Can I hold her? Please?"

"Alright, just be careful with her." Rosie said, passing Alice to Charlie.

"Hi, Alice. My name's Charlie."

Alice was looking around with those large void eyes, her ears moving about this way and that, but she focused on Charlie with a giggle.

Well - after the formula and baby stuff was delivered, a nursery was set up for Alice, next to Alastor and Rosie's room.

"I call being the fun Aunt!" Cherri raised a hand with a bomb, challenging anyone to fight her.

"As long as I'm the cool Uncle." Angel said.

"No way! If anyone is the cool one, it's me!"

"Why do you want in on this, Vagina?" Angel asking Vaggie this made Cherri laugh.

"Don't make me give Niffty a sharp object and the order to stab you." Vaggie actually had a soft spot for kids.

#hazbin rosie #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #radiorose #radiorose oc #radiorose au - what if #hotel arrival- what if

[strawbrygashez]

POSTAL 4 DUDE X GOTH READER

Rings

You and Dude are going to a concert!!! :D how fun!!! This isn’t serious or super long but I hope at least someone likes it!! 🖤🦇👻🪦⛓🔪🔮

————————————————————————

“Now would ya look at that!” Dude teased after catcall whistling at you once you’d finally emerged from the bathroom and into the living room where he’d sat waiting. You couldn’t help the slight blush that came though you’ve been with him for a year now and have heard him complement you plenty of times. It didn’t help he had his glasses off for the moment and you could see him looking you up and down with a certain…kinda glaze to them, almost like he could pounce on you right then and there.

But he knew better than that right now since you spent so lo- “I guess it makes up for the hour and a half you’ve spent getting ready!” He added in, his hungry glance suddenly switching to a playful one. God his moods could switch fast. You rolled your eyes at him. He knew damn well that it takes time to put together a look this intricate, especially with the makeup and all the layers of different things you decided to toss together for today. But you couldn’t stay annoyed at him too long when he stretched his arms out towards you with his grin still not leaving. You two probably should have at least started to be on the way to the concert by now but…yknow, it wouldn’t really hurt to entertain him for a minute. Besides the venue was surprisingly close this time and you wouldn’t be devastated to miss the runner up bands so..fuck it.

You grin as you walked closer to him but before you could prepare yourself for whatever he wanted, he suddenly grabbed you by the waist and tugged you down to sit on his lap, back facing towards him. “Dude! Be careful! I-” you started but cut yourself off as you felt him pull you closer so he could nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck. He stayed silent a bit as he took your hands in his and gave you a kiss on your shoulder before speaking. “God, you’re gorgeous. You know that?” Even though you wanted to point out how he’s just gone through at least three different emotions in the last couple minutes, you instead just frowned a bit as your blush came back even worse. “W-whatever Dude….” was all you could say. He chuckled a bit as he moved his head to rest his chin on your shoulder before lifting one of your hands up and slightly moving it as though he was inspecting it. “I think you’d be proud to know I still haven’t chipped the nail polish you did last night! See?”Dude said as he put his hand out next to yours. Your sharp and long nails still indeed matched his in color and cleanliness. In the past when you’ve done Dudes nails, he always ended up picking at the nail polish before even a week could go by. It never really bothered you or hurt your feelings though. He’s always just been one of those guys who needed to be doing something with his hands or messing with something but it did feel nice to see all of his black nail polish looked as good as you did it the other night.

“Oh wow. Yeah I am proud of you babe! Were you looking forward to dressing up too today or something?” You asked him with a smile. Maybe you also should have told him to get ready while you were…seeing as he was still in his clothes from yesterday but oh well. “Hmm..I dunno. I was just more careful because you seemed so excited about today, so. Why? Are you wanting me to dress up and be some kinda vampire prince for the day?” He teased. The truth was he was actually genuinely a little excited to dig through his clothes and find his old black trench coat and whatever old band shirt that has survived the passing of time (which should be commendable if you’re being worn by Dude of all people) but you didn’t need to know that. Maybe he should tell you though that it does make his heart flutter a bit when he matches with you but..maybe later. That’s too soft for even right now.

You shrugged and interlocked your fingers with his before leaning back on him some. “Wear whatever. I don’t care.” It was the truth. You liked Dude for who he was, not what he wore or looked like. You didn’t expect a guy who was getting grey hairs already to still wanna dress to the nines with you. To be honest you were even kinda surprised he wanted to be in a crowd with a bunch of younger alternative people dancing around. “Nah. It’s fine. I got some clothes that have probably been begging to see daylight again anyways.” Dude replied before he tried to think back to the days when he’d somewhat tried to dress in a alternative style (though unlike yours. Yours was much more beautifully crafted and traditionally goth than whatever he was doing.)

If he had to guess it was probably back in the early 2000s when he was still with his bitch of a ex. He would have maybe been even more darkly inclined back then if his ex didn’t give him as much of a hard time already for dressing ‘like a freak’ for wearing his old trench coat everywhere, even during the heat because it just felt nice to wear and was useful. But before he could let himself slip too far back into those depressing thoughts, he felt you suddenly untangling your hands. He looked back down at yours as he watched you slip one of your rings off your finger and onto his. Before he could ask anything, you faced towards him with a grin and joked “There. At least it will look like you tried to dress up anyways.”

He just sat there for a moment, looking at you and then the ring. Trying really hard not to think too hard about the fact that the feeling of wearing rings similar to ones you had on made his heart beat faster and got him thinking of giving you a certain ring. He’s sure you could tell though by the way he felt his cheeks get warmer. “Y-yeah. Whatever. I uh- I think we’re cutting it close yknow? I should probably start getting dressed now so…” he gently took you by your waist again, sliding you off his thighs and onto the couch before standing up and doing his best to ignore your confused reaction. “You okay?” You asked as you watched him scratch his head, a habit he does when he’s nervous. “Yeah..I-I’m good. Just gonna get dressed.” He stopped himself and tried to get his wits back. “Dont worry! I won’t take a whole half a day like you do.” He teased. To his relief you just rolled your eyes again and grinned. Taking this as a go ahead, he left to go dig whatever clothes he could up.

-

Once he came back in, you couldn’t help but swoon a bit over how handsome he looked. He’d mentioned something about having a black trench coat and black combat boots before but seeing them in person…along with some fucking killer band shirt with some spiked bracelets..now maybe you wanted Dude to entertain your thoughts like you were willing to do for him earlier. But this time you two really should be leaving so you’ll have to save those ideas for afterwards. He only seemed a little bashful at being in a style different than what he was used to for so long but he seemed to perk up after you got up and now were checking him out. “You…look super fucking hot in that babe.” You complimented him, chucking a little at just how taken back you were. Before he could be worried that the laughing that followed was because he looked dumb, you again took his hand and looked him up and down, biting your bottom lip a tad which, of course gave him his confidence back. “’Course I do! I can obviously rock anything.” He joked but you knew it really was the truth. This man could look hot in even a garbage bag in your eyes.

Agreeing with him with a little ‘mhm’, you gave him a kiss on the cheek (that would have to suffice for how you felt now). He grinned as you pulled away and you were going too until you noticed that you’d left a black lipstick stain on his cheek. You only stared at him for a minute but that was long enough for Dude to piece two and two together of what had happened, especially when you went to go wipe off his cheek. He grinned even more widely as he stopped you. “Like hell you’re getting rid of that sweetheart.” Ugh. “Cmon Dude you already look so nice and-” and for some god damn reason before he could hear you out, he decided to fucking run and burst out of the house before you could try again. You were stunned only for a second before he yelled out, “CMON WE’RE GOING TO BE LATE!” God. Like he expects you to run after him in your platform boots. You act like a normal human being and take your time getting everything together and locking the door behind you before you finally turn around to see Dude already in his truck, in the driver seat, waving for you to come on.

#postal dude #postal dude x reader #this was rlly goofy..I’m gonna be doing a p1 x goth reader that’s gonna be more serious 🫡 #also can u tell I suck at naming fics!?! #sorry for any mistakes as usual!!!

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

F&B Chapter 2 thoughts:

Completely unserious opening. "King Aegon's 37 year reign was super peaceful if you ignore that it was founded on 2 genocides & setting everything on fire till all your other future subjects give up in fear. You also need to ignore the near 2 decades of war at its start. Those last actual 2 decades though? Practically a utopia!"

Once again: I feel bad for everyone forced to lose because One-gon & his much cooler sisters had dragons. You don't "take advantage of the chaos of Aegon's Conquest" to name yourselves independent if you actually want to be under his rule. They had a whole queen, a named queen, & then here came the literal whole navy & Visenya to threaten the Sistermen into submission. And then we see a queen regnant getting violently deposed by her own men & needlessly brutalized &/or humiliated for her trouble a second time. Marla Sunderland deserved better. Why the fuck did she get her tongue cut out 5 years after the fact, George? And the framing of Steffon Sunderland's sons being fostered with the Manderlys & the Arryns. "He handed them over for his good behavior," they were hostages & probably straight up yoinked. I hope Maester Gyldayn was compensated for his work, because this man was in the trenches trying to make the Targs look good.

The Ironborn have never known how to act, & I love them. Straight up murdering each other for a whole year bc their royal family for the last few centuries got turned into a brick oven pizza in one (1) night. Babes, just reinstate the kingsmoot. Also, I'm willing to believe that Lodos killed himself, but "thousands followed" is so fucking vague. The thousands who drowned with him were definitely killed for the crime of not wanting to live under One-gon/being potential dissidents who would rise up & start this shit over again.

Laughing eternally that everyone keeps clapping when One-gon shows up. "There were so few Ironmen left after a year of killing each other that they didn't resist. Also everyone cheered, they totally wanted to be under Valyrian rule!"

Stan Dorne, we love a Russian Winter Strategy. Also their ousting of Aegon's dudes after he was all "since they aren't here, I won & I'm taking their stuff" is the funniest fucking thing. "The Dornish Lords had a wager to see who could keep people alive longest while torturing them," be for real my dude, I know you pulled that out of your ass just to vilanize them & appease Aerys. This section is peak comedy, & full of icons. We love actually using our brains ❤️

YouExpectMeToFeelSorryForThatBitch.gif (you can decide who this is about, but if you name someone from Dorne you chose wrong)

Hey George, after all those back & forth war crimes bc Rhaenys fucked around & found out I'm gonna need to know tf was in that letter Prince Nymor wrote. You don't need to tell anyone else, just whisper it in my ear & I will take it to the grave. I just want to know what ended all of that, because good Lord. Everyone made the Conqueror Trio's refusal to get off Princess Meria's lawn every person on the respective opposing side's problem. I'm not going to fault Dorne for wanting them out, because context & also no one wanted the Targs around, but dadgum. Both sides were doing the absolute most (also I am not surprised that Aerys was more willing to have beastiality explained to his baby son than why the people of Dorne maybe hated them)

The "Dornish Courage" mockery thing are the words of bitter little haters who are just mad they didn't have the brain power to do what Meria did. Once again: what an icon. Stan Meria Martell.

#misa reads f&b #anti targaryen #personally i do enjoy the faceless men threat theory & i KNOW it aint the sorcery one #but i want to KNOW george #also tell me why i thought Rhaenys dying was gonna be more than a blink & you'll miss it line #the way i have seen some people (both sides) cary on

[nevadas-night-time-novelist]

This story was taken from my old blog's drafts since it was nearly finished when I stopped lol.

@giugirl743 pretty sure it was you who asked for this.

Main 4 x reader - Adopting fluffies

Prelude:

It'd taken you slightly longer to finish your mission, leaving your partner to pace in his room, anticipating your return, or at least some news from you. He had half a mind to just go out to your location and find out what was keeping you, until you pushed the door open with your hip, a brown box in your arms.

"What took you so long?" He questioned, eyeing the box. "This, check it out." You laid it on the floor, opening up the flap to six little gruntlings, four of them looking similar with light grey fur, one with dark tiger stripe patterns, another a tortoiseshell of greys, but the two that stood out the most were the pure white one and pure black one.

Hank

- "What the fuck-" He's confused, these are perhaps the ugliest looking cats he's ever seen, tiny bumbling things without a muzzle or ears or even a tail. But he's easily won over as he sticks a hand into the box, the furry little fellas flocking to him, sniffing and rubbing against his arm.

- "Cute." He picks the melanistic one up, examining one of his teeny paws. "What the hell are they though? Some kind of... Cat-grunt hybrid?" "Seems like it. I found them in that box, along with a note saying 'Rejects, to be destroyed.' I couldn't leave them there Hank, I just couldn't."

- "You're lucky they're cute." By now the others had managed to climb their way out of the box, you shut the door to stop them escaping into the bowels of the base. "But what exactly are we going to do with them?"

- "Keep them of course, I don't know of anyone who'd take them in, and I'm sure as hell not leaving them outside to be hunted and killed. Look at them, they're just babies, they'll die Hank." Hank looked back to the black furball in his hands, he gave a pathetic 'mew' and licked Hank's thumb.

- "Doc is gonna be pissed with you." Doc is indeed pissed with you. "That's six more mouths to feed, six mouths that can't earn their stay, six mouths that need to be constantly monitored. You're a fucking idiot."

- You meekly held out Snowball, the albino female, to Doc's face. "How can you say no to her?" The others crowded around his feet, mewing and clawing at his trousers, pleading their case wordlessly.

- "For the love of- Y'know what, fine. They're your problem, I don't want to deal with them. You and Hank can sort it out between you, and if you can't, get rid of them, I am not helping you with them at all."

- Hank treats them like pets, he finds bowls for food and water, cat toys to keep them entertained, getting them collars with little bells so you can hear them because he's nearly stepped on them so many times. He also gets pet beds, which never actually get used because the furry gang all sleep on your shared bed.

- The little buggers shed a lot, Hank has gone through so many lint rollers trying to keep his trench coat clean. It doesn't work, the second its fur free, the fuzzy assholes climb all over him and get fur on it again.

Sanford

- "Whoa shit, look at that, haha-" He scoops the tortoiseshell one out of the box and looks her over. "Funny looking thing aren't you? Like a grunt, but... hairier."

- "Reject clones, agency was going to euthanize them." "What? But look at em! These things are just little babies." "I think that's the point honey. Agency is out to kill us, remember? Can't do that with furry babies." "I dunno babe, these things could kill with their cuteness, just like you."

- He takes to the lil furballs well, thanks to his massive frame he can easily carry all of them, a frequent sight around the base is four fluffballs clinging to his shoulders, one on his head, and the last in his arms. If anyone questions it, he just replies with "They're my kids."

- Similarly to Hank, he'll bring back goodies for them to play with, tiny mouse toys, balls with bells inside them, those fishing rod like tease toys with feathers on the end.

- He wasn't joking with the kids remark, mother hen mode is activated, he won't even allow Doc to tell them off if they eat some of his documents. "They're just little babies, they didn't do it on purpose, look at them." They 100% did it on purpose.

- When he's alone/thinks he's alone in the base, he'll talk back to them when they mew at him. Ford doesn't understand them, but he'll just smile and pat their little heads. "Oh, is that right?" "No, it's not dinner time yet." "You're right, they are a lovely parent, aren't they?"

- If Sanford falls asleep before you, expect no room to cuddle him, the fluffies have already claimed him as a snuggle buddy.

Deimos

- "Oh shit, I haven't seen one of these in ages." He picks up a pure grey one by the scruff and it squeals in protest. "Dei! Hold them gently or not at all!" You chastise him, taking the furry fella from his hand.

- "Babe, they're like every other clone, just smaller. And hairier. Trust me, these little bastards are just playing the long con, I know from experience." You raise an eyebrow at him. "But look at them, they're just little babies. You can't tell me they're sinister."

- "Babe, I know what clones are like, these guys included." He picked up another one, this time gently so you wouldn't get snippy with him again. "They just pretend to be pathetic little pets."

- "Pretending or not, I'm keeping them. If you don't like it, then you can sleep on the couch." He reluctantly let the issue go.

- The more time you spend with them however, the sweeter he starts to become. You're curled up on the couch on your tablet, Jet sits on your lap and watches Deimos approach and sit next to you, tossing am arm around your shoulders. Jet lets out a soft "Meep!" and leaps from your lap into his. Instinctively he brushes his hand down the melanistic furball's back as though he was a cat.

- Maybe these walking dust balls aren't so bad after all. Jet pukes up a hairball onto Deimos' tank top. "You motherfucker-" Or maybe they're just waiting for a moment of weakness to strike.

2BDamned

- "No." "I haven't even-" "I know what you're going to ask, and it's a no." "But Kyle-" 2BD shakes his head. "Honey, I can let a lot of things slide, but this is just weird. They're clones, even if they are pretending to be domestic pets, they think, walk, and talk like us."

- You put your hands over his and gave him the best puppy eyes you could. "They're just babies, we could raise them right." It doesn't take much to wear him down, he can't resist you, those sad gorgeous eyes, soft low tone, delicate frown.

- "You're gonna be the death of me. Fine. There are conditions, however." You don't let him finish, jumping into his arms and kissing his forehead. "Thank you." He exhales and shakes his head. "They're your burden to bear. If you can't care for them, then I will get rid of them."

- And he's true to his word, he doesn't feed them, groom them, play with them, nothing. It's entirely your responsibility. Hairballs? You're doing the washing. Poop/pee accidents? You're cleaning the floor.

- He refuses to warm up to them. To him, they're just little pests, no doubt one day they'll grow up and just be assholes to him anyway. And yet the little bastards won't leave him alone. Mewling and begging for his love, tiny paws pulling at his pant legs.

- Yet he remains steadfast. One night you find him leaning back in his chair, having dozed off during one of his many all-nighter sessions of work, Tiger has made his lap her resting place. Sitting in loaf position, the fluff sleepily chirps as you come over.

- You gently rouse 2B and guide him to bed, knowing he'll be cranky about a sore spine otherwise. Tiger follows, and in his sleepy state, 2B doesn't push her away when she settles on his chest to sleep as well.

#madness combat #madcom #madness combat reader insert #madcom x reader #madness combat x reader #2bdamned #2bdamned x reader #hank j wimbleton #hank #hank x reader #sanford #sanford x reader #deimos #deimos x reader #fluffy grunts #x gon deliver to ya

[artsyunderstudy]

WIP Wedneday

I am deep in the trenches with We Still Bloom which is my Hanahaki WS/AWTWB AU and I am f r e a k i n g out but hey, the good news is that it’s coming out relatively quickly, and I might actually have it done in time as long as I can get it to my beta before Monday.  So like, prayers, seances, dark rituals, whatever.  It’s all appreciated.

I’ll definitely post it in time, but whether it’ll be the FULL fic is yet to be determined.  I want it, ideally, to be a one-shot.

Anyway.  Here’s something that’s not a total bummer.  (Not like ... completely)

Kissing Simon is good.  So, so good.  It’s everything.  

He pushes a hand into my hair at the nape of my neck and grips, tugs, drawing a low groan out of me.  Fuck. Too much.  That’s probably too much.  I suck in a breath through my nose, trying to soften the kiss, trying to pull back, but he laughs into my mouth.  It’s low and husky, vibrating in my throat. 

"Missed you," he sighs.  "How was class?"

"You really want to talk about economics, Snow?"

He shrugs and laughs again, pressing his nose into my cheek.

I missed you, too.  

I'm afraid to say it out loud.  

It's true, though.  Not just today.  For weeks I've missed him.  He's been pulling away and I don't know how to hold on.  I don't always know if he wants me to.  I can feel his smile against my mouth, though.  He’s here with me, in this moment.  He’s reaching out.  I don't have to miss him right now.

Also, I shared this on discord but I’ll put it here too since I like it.  Early art for the fic!

Tags under the cut!

@forabeatofadrum​ @johnwgrey​ @moodandmist​ @takitalks​ @bazzybelle​  @ileadacharmedlife​ @aristocratic-otter​  @urban-sith​ @facewithoutheart​ @basiltonbutliketheherb​ @letraspal​  @tea-brigade​ @stardustasincocaine​ @palimpsessed​ @cutestkilla​ @whatevertheweather​  @nightimedreamersworld​  @orange-peony​  @carryonsimoncarryonbaz​  @ionlydrinkhotwater​ @raenestee​ @fatalfangirl​ @captain-aralias​ @ivelovedhimthroughworse​ @aroace-genderfluid-sheep​ @martsonmars​ @erzbethluna​ @hushed-chorus​ @stitchyqueer​ @confused-bi-queer​ @larkral @bookish-bogwitch @whogaveyoupermission @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

#artsyfic #wip wednesday #artsyart #snowbaz #simon snow #baz pitch

[kaleidoscopexsighs]

music/fic tag game

Share 3 to 5 songs that have inspired a current WIP.

thank you @kaaaaaaarf my lawfully-wedded wife for the tag!

currently in the trenches finishing part one of this is my body so have some song inspo while i force myself to stop nitpicking!

1. strangers // sun bleached flies - ethel cain

(cheating a bit right out the gate with this 2-for-1 but ethel cain is basically the raison dêtre of this whole thing so that’s that on that)

In your basement, I grow cold / Thinking back to what I was always told / “Don’t talk to strangers or you might fall in love” /…I tried to be good, am I no good?

and ofc:

God loves you, but not enough to save you

2. too repressed - sometymes why

I want to fuck you but I’m too repressed / I want to suck you but I can’t take off my dress

3. for emily, whenever i may find her — simon & garfunkel

And when I awoke and felt you warm and near / I kissed your honey hair with my grateful tears / Oh I love you girl

4 . fast blood - frightened rabbit

And now I, I tremble / Because this fumble has just become biblical / I feel like I just died twice / I was reborn again for all our dirty sins

5. river - leon bridges

Oh, I wanna come near and give ya every part of me / But there’s blood on my hands and my lips aren’t clean

tagging babe @behaveddestroyerrating and anyone else who wants to play!

#fic: this is my body #it’s just thinly veiled period sex metaphors all the way down #tag game #lesbian wolfstar

[boxwinebaddie]

psst! nina! -slides you $20- record store stan and comic book store kyle hanging out on their lunch break…plz 😩🥺💍

excuse me!!!! i am an upstanding law abiding citizen! i would never take a bribe!!!!...but if it somehow ended up on the floor or in my purse while i wasn't looking sahdhdkjs

but bestie i would have done it for free <3 i fucking...Love stan and kyle having edgy boy nerdy boy boyfriend solidarity they're so fkn cute to me oh my god aaaaa

also they work right across the street from each other so they do be shamelessly ogling each other all the time when they're supposed to be working. they also call each other on their work phones all the time and kyle is like "stan i told u not to call me when i'm working!!!!" and stan is like "but i MISSED u!" and hes like "bitch i am literally across the street" and stan is like "so cross the street and give me a big wet sloppy kiss dummy!" shdkjsa

they also totally badly prank call each other which is so funny bc its like I CAN SEE U STUPID!!! and also sometimes jealous kyle calls in like STAN IF YOU DONT TELL THAT BITCH W THE LANA DEL REY ALBUM AND THE BELLY BUTTON PIERCING U HAVE A BOYFRIEND RN IM COMING OVER THERE SHSKHD my hero oh my god!! stan is like ITS FOR HER GIRLFRIEND GENIUS SHE ALSO BOUGHT GIRL IN RED skahsd hes like that man in there tho with all the hair products in his hair!!!! he is not trying to score spiderman hes trying to score ur number sex-c!!! tell him ur closed...also my hero

i am like in the trenches of writer girl hell writing thirteen and trying to put good vibes back into my life so i...unfortunately could not put actions in it ( if u slide me $10 tho...i might consider it ) it's just dialogue but its funny i swear help!!! theyre cute!!!

...i hope this was worth your 20 dollars that ended up mysteriously in my pocket. Please Clap.

*DING!*

“Hey! Welcome to Vinyl Tap! My name is Stan, how may I help you—“

“Yooou know you’re not allowed in here anymore, sir!”

“And why is that…” “Kimberley?” *they never made stan a name tag*

“Because!” “You’re too tall…and good looking. No one will buy anything when you’re in here. They’re too busy looking at you. Me included.”

*stan winks and waves* *kyle rolls his eyes and does a sarcastic twirl*

“And management told me you keep checking out the check out guy at the counter. Absolutely unacceptable behavior.” “You disgust me.” “At least buy me dinner first.”

“I bought you lunch, actually, Asshole.” “Here’s dessert, bitch.” *kyle flips stan off*

“Aw! So sweet, bro! Just for that, you can have a bite.” *stan flips kyle off* “Sorry, your blood sugar looked low.” “And listen, If you’re gonna flip me off at least flip the sign around, you skyscraper! Mmkay?”

“Mmkay.”

“Ooh, ooh, oooooh! What is it?”

“Sniff.”

“NO!”

“Yes.”

“Oh my god?! Is it the super fucking delicious marinated tofu bahn mi from that new vegan Vietnamese food truck that parks next to City Hall? That I’ve been talking about—“

“For weeks. Yes. Please shut the fuck up now.”

“Did you add extr—“

“Extra jalapeño. Obviously, dipshit. I’m surprised you still have working taste buds.”

“Annnnnd—“

“And a Laaaarge Thai tea, sub oat milk. Yeah, yeah, yeahhh, whatever P r i n c e s s.”

“MY KY TEA!”

*holds his orange drink up to his kyles orange head excitedly*

“I totally forgot to pack a lunch earlier and everything! This is going to save my Life. Ugh, Dude, KP! You are LITERALLY the Best!”

*leans across the counter to hug kyle n almost crushes him 2 death*

“I know. And I have several awards and accolades that will back that statement up.”

“Also, I fucking K N E W it!”

“Knew what, motherfucker?”

“That you forgot to take your fucking ADHD medication again!”

“Nooooo…”

“Maaaaaybe…”

“Stan…”

“I know, I know, I knoooooow! I’m sorry! But also, if I am ‘chemically imbalanced’ or whatever and have a hard time remembering shit and focusing, why the fuck would they give me this thing I have to remember to do every morning? Like, it’s just so—“

“Babe.”

“Bro?”

“Food, drink, pill.”

“Fooooood, driiiiink, pillllll~”

*stan is very pleased with his stan-wich*

“Oh my god. D A N K.” “Best lunch EVER. I’m sooooo happy, I could totally k i s s you right now!”

“So kiss me, Dumbass.”

“Well, since you asked so nicely…”

*alexa play pony by ginuwine ;)*

*...did stan jump up on the counter and wrap his legs around kyle's waist...i can neither confirm nor deny these allegaytions ur honor*

“Peppermint.”

“Cherry.”

“Swap?”

“Swap.”

“Cherry.”

“Peppermint.”

“Way better.”

“Agreed?”

“Agreed.”

*kyle pulls back n eyes stan incredulously...and indecently ;)*

“Hold on a second…” “Marsh…”

“Broflovski?”

“Where is the rest of your shirt?”

“Out to lunch?” “Boo! Are you seriously dissing my fit, right now, bro?”

“Your fit would not FIT an eight year old boy!"

“Take it up with Kenny! He did it last night. He said it would help bring in sales.”

“He would say that.” “And what kind? OnlyFans?”

*deflecting and distraught bc...Hot*

“Kyle, c’mon! It’s c u t e!”

“It’s a CROP TOP.”

“It’s fun!”

“It’s INDECENT.”

“You’re staaaaring~” *stan shamelessly teasing kyle vc*

“It stared at me first.” *kp scowl insult combo bc hes nervous rip*

“It’s hot out there!”

“It’s hot IN here.”

“Ooh, say that again.”

“That.”

“Nevermind, I fucking hate you.” *more middle finger*

“I love you too.” *kissy noises*

“Ew, cute.” “But my eyes are up here. Pervert.”

*stan props kyles chin up on his finger so they can make sexually charged eye contact...seek jesus*

“They’re pretty…”

“Pretty weird looking.”

*stan looking crispy because he just got roasted*

“I’M weird looking!? Have you SEEN yourself?”

“Oh, HELL no! I am not taking smoke from a dude with frosted tips wearing low rise jeans and a shirt that looks like it could have been purchased from the junior girls section of Target. All you need is Kenny to tattoo a butterfly tramp stamp on you and you’re good to go, Paris Hilton.”

“And I'M not taking SMOKE from a dude wearing his dorky Cosmic Comic work uniform hat forwards instead of backwards like anyone over the age of 12.”

*stan totally takes his hat off and wears it like a backwards fuckboy snapback, kyle starts choking help sdsjh*

“Basketball shorts and…a Batman baseball tee that looks like it could have been purchased from the junior BOYS section of Target.” “Even if it does make your arms look really good.”

“Really? Ah-ahah. T-Thank you. Your a-arms also—” *nervous kyle stuttering* “Clever diversion tactic, but Stan, do NOT start this fight with me again! I reeeeally do not want to have this fight AGA—“

“Dude, he’s like, not even a Real superhero! He literally BOUGHT his way into being a superhero! He has no superpower! His superpower is being RICH!”

“Bro, so did IRON MAN!”

*cue stan and kyles regular n daily marvel dc fight to the death*

“OKAY! Well, Tony Stark has a wicked sweet robot butler and Bruce Lame-yne just has that weird creepy old guy who should probably have his name on the sex offenders list.”

*kyle absolutely fucking aghast*

“I’m sorry — Did you just refer to Alfred as ‘that weird creepy old guy’?”

“—Who probably wants to diddle little boys, but yes, that’s exactly what I said, Kyle!”

*eye twitches in rabid comic book boy*

“…And are you implying that Jarvis is cooler than ALFRED?!”

“I am not just implying that information…”

“I am d e l i n e a t i n g it to you.”

*stan using his english hw vocab rizz like kyle look look i studied*

“Mwah.”

*stan flabbergasted dramatic boy sounds*

“EXCUSE ME!!!! DID YOU JUST THROW MY KISS IN THE TRASH!?!?”

*he shoooooots, he scooooores*

“No, I threw in it in recycling because I know you’re a hoe for the environment.”

*stan abt to ask kyle to help him find something in the stock room...i really hope its the bible*

“…Okay, w-wowz—Jesus Christ. Ky, you know it’s seriously so hot to me when you recycle responsibly, but..."

*rizzed stan so hard oh my god hes blushin omg is it hot in here*

“Hope you heal from being a DC dickrider.”

“And I hope you heal from gargling Marvel’s balls.”

“Y’know, I still cannot believe you don’t like Batman, Stan. Like you are literally a DICK GRAYSON variant!”

“Woah, you said Dick with a loooot of confidence. Watch out; people might think you’re gaaaa—“

*kyle mad as hell bc he got dusted by his sbbf*

“Yeah, very funny, Stan. It’ll be way funnier when I bury this shithole on Yelp when I accuse you of a hate crime.”

“Okay, concept: hear me out. No hate crimes, just…” “Date Time?”

*stan vana white hand flourish w the emo boy rings*

“How about…we call you in some chicken strips, curly fries an—“

“CANIHAVEACHER��“

*absolutely feral diabetes boy behavior*

“Yes, oh my goood, you fucking FIEND…You can have a cherry coke. But…BUT! it has to be MEDIUM, KP! M e d i u m! Last time you had a large you got totally cracked out on liquid candy carbonation and started talking CRAZY. Like, you literally sounded like a cult leader. I thought you were going to start having religious visions and shit; it was scary.”

*stan shiny eyes emoji*

“Then…can we pleaaaase eat at the pond?! Please, please, please? I bought a mason jar full of oats in my backpack so I could feed the ducks! The little ones are soooo cut—“

“You remembered a lunch for the DUCKS and not yourself?!” “Ugh, and Stan, I HATE Stark’s Pon—“

*three fingers in the air assistant troop leader stan vc scouts honor*

“I promise to protect you from children, frisbees, the elderly, unpredictable water fowl and people with petitions…Do we have a deal, Kyle Pile?”

*oh no not the eyelash flutter...its super effective*

“…If one of those sick, feathered fucks bites me or shits on me, I’m turning that pond into duck soup.”

“YAY!” “Okay, let’s go. Hold my hand?”

“Stan, are you five years old?”

*stanley marsh signature pout...ur litrally proving his point bff*

“Kyle, you KNOW crossing the street freaks me out.” “Now hold my freaking hand, Assface!”

*aw romance*

“Wooooow, trying so hard to hold my hand. Watch out; people might think you’re gaaaa—“

*stan like five centimeters away from kyles mouth*

“…P l e a s e, baby?”

*more extremely nervous flustered kyle stuttering*

“I—W-whatever.” “There, happy?”

“Extremely.”

“Your hands are sweaty.”

“You make me nervous.”

*bebe vc* And Scene ;)

#aw...true love #bestie im sorry this is not my finest work but i hope u laugh thank u for buying me lunch #SPEAKING OF BUYING PEOPLE LUNCH kyle remembering stans crunchy boy lil lunch order...AW STAN CALLING KYLE HIS KY TEA LIKE PLS #idk why i put stan in a crop top but also i know he looked good kyle was mad as hell and wanted to makeout abt it smh #they really do b bickering like an old married couple #THEY HAVE THE DC MARVEL FIGHT EVERY DAMN DAY ITS SO UNSERIOUS #them being like damn thats pretty gay bro watch it bro people might think ur gay bro #my sons...who i raised...myself...with sharon and shelia...amen...<3 #THEM DOING THE MMKAY CALL AND RESPONSE IS LIKE THEIR RUNNING INSIDE JOKE #kyle talks abt recycling and stans like im going to do terrible and obscene things to u in the stock room...smh

[originemesis]

@sonxfadam

Hey look a compliment, that's nice. "Nah. That was more Seth's or my sisters thing. No time to study when there was work to be done and better shit to do. I was referring to the mark, if your girlfriend tries something because she can't handle the truth then you'll be the one trying to piece her back together. And I don't think anyone wants that."

Is he intentionally ignoring Lute? Yeah.

A vexed trench cements itself between ashen brows, not particularly fond of the first man's surly offshoot's implications; that she is both ignorant and ungovernable, but the brazen-faced effrontery directed at Adam's character is what's really got her hackles rising.

"Whatever crimes you believe your father to be guilty of have not stopped him from rising to a station of exceptional prestige within the holy kingdom. As far as I'm concerned, that is testament enough to the impeccable integrity of his soul. Integrity which I have personally become intimately familiar with over the course of the many, many years I've been in his service."

A beat of monochrome wings to shake loose a spot of tension.

"You should be proud of him, actually."

Oh, he's good... at looking not interested in what women had to say, that is. But he was by no means better at it than the First Man, so it very much just looks like some kid trying their hand at mimicking one of their parent's posture if anything. And to add insult to injury, Adam wasn't looking at him while he was in his disinterested state. Nah, the alpha energy in the room was more enjoyable to consider and that was coming from his lieutenant, not his son and his prattling.

"Aw, thanks, babe. I am fucking rad. You can call me Radam." His feathers pick up on the oh so subtle raising of hackles by his side, and he muses to her in turn after she's locked in to laying in to him as if every piece she could tear off would gladly be used to lift heaven's general higher than he already was up his own ass.

Still... the mention of a mark perks his ears, and gets the ice in his cup crunching as he gives it a little jarring shake to the vibrations that Lute's wings provide before he steps ahead of her, stalking forward the short distance from Cain. "Oh- look how cute you are, threatening heaven-grade authority." There was a slight slant to the usual melodic tune of his teasing. It sounded testy- a degree of danger that only those of his flock might pick up on since they spent far too much time learning his back and calls.

With a wide, gnashing grin, he came to a stop directly across from his son, one talon fondling his own cheek in a mocking gush while the other continued to rattle the ice around his cup. "Heyyy, bud?" He chirped, leaning in. "...know what most of us want??"

Tuning out whatever hackling Lute may have been up to behind him now, he quickly squashed the drink cup hard to pop the top off it. "For you to keep..." Keeper. With a flick of the wrist, he slung the rest of the cherry Pepsi and ice in the kid's face, and then the cup too for good measure. "-your hands to your FUCKING self!" His wings were already flared with a crack - aiming to both keep Lute beck and to issue a warning to Cain to back off if he knew what was good for him. Two against one wasn't exactly fair after all. But hey, neither was one with a rock against one.

#//srry he always has to disturb the peace #//and yes i know hes probably going to get it- 8) #//no one disrespects his wims those are his to disrespect- #kugel-bitch #sonxfadam #long post #suggestive cw

[webslingingslasher]

Babe. My friend’s ex and the girl im in love with are taking to each other romantically. What are the odds we are in the trenches out here

oh my fucking god. i am so sorry bestie this is literally a vietnam situation

#thanks anon!

[bisexual-horror-fan]

Bex. Bex, Bex, Bex!!!!! When I saw your requests were open I nearly lost my mind <3

So, Buddy and Sam; we all know 'em, we all love 'em. I'm in desperate need for Mean!Poly!Camping Boys over here. Like, mean. Besides that I don't really have anything specific in mind besides a little bit of knife play (because it's me we're talking about) and possibly some predator/prey dynamics >:) You'd destroy me in the best way if Sam was the meaner one out of the pair too!

Anyways, I love you and hope you're doing well!!!!

Oh B! Now this is a fucking amazing prompt! It’s been a while since I have written the boys and a while since I have treated you so I feel like this is necessary and important! So I decided to elect to do something we have been sorely missing thus far! Poly!Camping Boys! Killer edition! That is right! Metal Kill and the Wood Carver at once babe! Also yes I am doing well and I love you too so much for suggesting this so! Let’s fucking GO!

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Rating. Explicit. Length. 1.9K. Metal Killer/Buddy Swanson And The Wood Carver/Sam Wescott X GN! AFAB! Reader! Poly!Camping KILLER Boys! Warnings! Murder. Blood. Gore. Canon Violence. Chase. Fear Play. Predator/Prey. Knife Play. Hitting. Spanking. Man Handling. Rough Treatment. Rough Sex. Vaginal Sex. Oral Sex. Blow Job. Threesome. Spit Roast. A-Frame. Throat Fucking. Gagging. Swallowing. Vaginal Fingering. Messy. Blood Play. Outdoor Sex. Forced Orgasm. Multiple Orgasms. Overstimulation. Taunting. Teasing. Pet Names. Bastard Boys. Groping. Dub Con. Threat Of Death.

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Run Rabbit, Run.

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You were completely terrified.

How long have you been running for?

It felt like hours of sprinting and hiding and hunkering but you weren’t out of the woods yet, literally, you were in the forest around Camp Clear Vista right now, trying to lay low and be quiet. You were excited for camp, had attended camps in your youth and as soon as you were old enough to start giving back as a counsellor you did so, this was going to be your first year at Camp Clear Vista since your old one closed down. The guy who interviewed you, whose family owned the camp, Sam, was seemingly a really nice guy, if not a little nervous. 

It started great, your fellow counsellors were nice, a good eclectic group of young adults all around your age, all interested and invested in giving the kids a good summer and having a lot of fun while you did it. The first day was spent working on clean up and maintenance, when night fell you all had dinner and ended up around the fire, spooky stories were told and you didn’t pay the tale of the Wood Carver any mind. People wanted to go hunt down the mask and you tagged along because it was better than being alone but that was all hours ago.

Hours before you discovered the first body.

Apparently the Wood Carver was in fact very fucking real. 

More than that there was someone else running around too, white and black mask, long black trench coat and big combat boots and what was one crazed killer not enough?!

That is what led to you hiding like this in the woods from them. You had gotten separated from the few counsellors you were with and so you figured if you were smart, stayed low and hidden and made it to morning, just to sunrise, you would be okay. At least that is what you kept telling yourself, you had to believe it, because what choice did you have otherwise?

They had been pursuing you earlier, you had to fight hard to lose them, there were some close calls, moments where you felt finger tips skim your arms or legs they were so close to getting you but you managed to wriggle away, somehow. All that fight and want to live probably has something to do with it. 

You hadn’t heard or seen from them in a while and you weren’t sure if that was a good thing or not. The nerves refused to leave, you were totally on edge, even after all the hard work you did today, you would normally be totally beat but you were so wired there was no way you could sleep now.

Or so you thought. 

You had been sitting in between some bushes, back leaning against a tree so you only had to be concerned with whatever came at you from in front, which would have worked great if you hadn’t dozed off. 

You were woken up rudely, roughly, two sets of hands on you and you had barely registered what was happening as you were hauled up and out from your hiding spot. 

It happens so fast, you can barely register it, eyes struggle to focus as you are tugged forward, pulled through the treeline, exposed knees dragged along sticks and rocks and dirt. You come through the trees, and can see the cabins in the distance, the shorter grass, the air more open, more light from the camp ground and the moon above. The sound of heavy footsteps and breathing filling your ears, you are shoved to the ground, on your back and you feel those strong hands holding you to him, your back to a broad chest. 

Sharp and cold steel is pressed to your throat, your eyes snap up, it was like you were wide awake, immediately and startlingly sober. Your heart was pounding as you looked up into the black and white mask, couldn’t make out the eyes clearly staring you down, a black leather glove clad hand was fisted in your shirt, keeping you in place, as if you could move with the hands holding you down. 

You had been caught and not just by one of them, no it seems by both of them. 

“Finally caught the bad little bunny rabbit. You give surprisingly good chase, you know that?” The man in front of you taunted and you tensed further, as if that was possible. “Wasn’t expecting you to be so speedy but we still got you.”

That knife dragged slowly, allowed you to feel how sharp it was without breaking the skin and you shivered even though the summer heat was so strong it made your clothes stick to you with sweat. “Must have tired yourself out, I couldn’t believe when we found you asleep like that, almost made it too easy.” 

Fuck, You were in such trouble, how would you get out of this with your life?

A stupid and quiet question leaves your too dry lips, “What are you going to do with me?”

The one brandishing the blade laughs, too hard and too long, you squirm and that knife is pressed closer as his laughter dies. “Awe come on. You’re smart.” 

That knife moves, it catches the strap of your tank top and is cut in one swift motion and at that same moment the hands on your shoulders drag down your hips. They hold firm and move your ass so you feel how undeniably hard your captor was now that you were in his lap, a hard grind against you. The one before you leaned in and said in that low voice, “Figure it out.”

You got the hint real fucking quick. 

Sex outside was something that was on your bucket list for camp this summer. This wasn’t how you expected it to happen. You weren’t expecting your clothing to be cut and ripped off, to be shoved onto your hands and knees, split from both ends. A threesome wasn’t something you had been ever actively planning on but you wouldn’t be closed off to it, it happening now was a lot to handle, especially when they were both so rough, so forceful.

The one in the black and white mask, with the leather gloves, who’d been holding the knife was the much more talkative one. The other one behind you, stronger, wearing that wooden mask you had heard from the campfire story, apparently true by the way, that was still something you were contending with, was almost silent. You could hear faint and weird whispers, harsh breathing and grunts of effort, two hands on your waist, locked tight, bruises being surely marked into your skin as he fucked into you. There was barely a courtesy spit, a cursory plunge of his fingers a few times before he was shoving inside and bottoming out. 

Gloved hand in your hair, knife to your cheek and the other was in your mouth and the brutal pace and rhythm was set. While the one currently balls deep inside of you didn’t seem to be one for words, he didn’t need to speak to destroy you. He held no weapon but was more violent than his theatrical counterpart. Pawed and pulled you back with such force, had no care for the sounds of protest you made, minimal because of the dick in your mouth, gagging you, seemed you trying to squirm away or the pain you showed fuels him and pushed him further. 

And the worst part of all of this.

Worse than the pain, than your knees getting scuffed up, than you nearly choking and barely able to breathe as your mouth is fucked?

You were loving this.

All of it. 

You always thought the people you fucked treated you too delicately but you always held back voicing what you really wanted for fear of scaring them off or seeming pushy or too much. But now? You were getting every filthy fucking itch scratched perfectly. The blade had cut your cheek, warm scarlet sliding down soft skin and it makes the man above you hiss and push harder into you, quicker, clearly getting close, the sight of your blood drawn by him exciting him that much more. 

You swallow around the head of his cock and his pace falters and with a curse and a few more short thrusts he is cumming, painting your tongue and you eagerly drink him back just as fast as the mess spills out. He lingers in your mouth for a moment before pulling out, his hand leaves your hair and he sits back on his knees, “Fuck, I knew you’d take it like a dream.”

He was out of breath, panting, you could see the makeup and paint that covered his skin not shielded by the mask was a mess, running a little from the sweat and exertion.

You weren’t done however. The killer behind you only slowed slightly when his cohort was cumming, didn’t stop, but slowed, however now he picked up the pace. His hand meets the back of your head and he pushes you, face down in the dirt and ass up he pounded you harder and you moan incoherently into the dirt. His hand is on the side of your face, fingers press into the fresh wound, more blood weeps and you hiss out in pain and clench around him tighter, agony and bliss mix and become near indistinguishable. You feel sore, you feel elated, you feel tired, you feel better than ever, you want to sleep for a year, you never want it to stop. 

“God he is really giving it to you. Guy has a lot of pent up aggression, clearly.” Taunted the man kneeling before you and almost as if to drive the point home a firm smack on your ass makes you yelp. 

Bloody and dirty fingers move down, shove into your mouth, confront you with the taste, assault your senses further as he has you. How your legs are still managing to hold you up is a mystery, you should be totally collapsing but nothing about this night or this made sense, you just held on. 

More groping, rough pinches of your nipples, nails scratch down your sides, more firm hits to your ass and thighs and pulls of your hair and you have lost track of the orgasms he has forced out of you during this. His companion keeps talking as he watches, more dirty talk and taunting and you can barely focus on his words over all the pure feeling you are going through. He was so harsh it made his friend seem almost tender and gentle in compairson as you are overstimulated near your limit.

You swear he hadn’t even been inside you that long but you had been craving this treatment for so long it didn’t take long for the orgasms to start and not stop. 

When he cums it is deep inside, holding to the hilt and when he does pull out, you do fall fully into the dirt. You are totally out of breath and have no fight when he fingers your abused hole and rubs the mess of blood and dirt and him and you on your messy cheeks, making you fully confront what the pair had subjected you to. 

Just when you thought you might have done it and saved yourself, had satisfied them as well as yourself, you hear the sound of metal being unsheathed and you knew you had no strength left to run.

You close your eyes and wait for penetration of a different kind than what you had just experienced. 

#OH BITCH #ITS HERE #Poly!Camping Boys x reader #Metal Killer X reader #The Wood Carver x reader #BHF writing #BHF asks #f1nalboys #MAN #SO #I gotta do more of this #Obviously