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tinukis · 4 months

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some details about one of my one piece ocs, Z here i should like draw proper ref of Z soon bc i think abt the little guy often. if i do talk about him more and draw him, i may just reveal his real name eventually

anyway theres really nothing happy about this boy from what i shared and i still have nothing happy. however the reason he even still holds onto life is because of books. he loves reading about adventures, whether the tales are from real journalists or something made up. it inspires Z to continue living on despite being chained down in hell

thats not what i actually wanna talk about, i just wanna talk abt something more lighthearted. while Z does appreciate all the strawhats, the ones hes most particularly fond of are luffy, nami, and robin

not that any of them told their stories, but that those four can really sympathize with Z. nami especially can relate with how Z believes he needs to shoulder everything himself to save his island considering hes only 13 enduring all this pain and suffering-- how he even refused to ask for the strawhats help until things were extremely desperate and that he had to accept that he really was powerless to do anything.

doesnt help that Z's "foster family" fed the strawhats too and how charismatic they are- Z thought that they were completely entranced by them so they wouldnt believe a word a bratty kid would say. and when Z felt completely helpless, he had pinned the blame on the strawhats and wished they never met bc things did go downhill for Z since his arrival

with robin, Z would talk about his favorite book and robin adores how he'd light up talking about it. not to mention him getting really excited when robin said she read the book before and gave him recommendations. (and as a parting gift, she gave Z a book she already finished reading. and it's about a kid his age starting their own adventure and writing everything about their exploits as they travel the world)

and with luffy, i'll admit was p hard to think about as hes not an easy character to write... but hes always been good w kids (AAAAUUUGJWHDIWHDK) and how theyve been inspired by him. what makes it harder to think about is how this kid has ace's face and acted similar to a younger ace. luffy felt a bit uneasy and Z just didnt like him at all. though theyre attracted to each other like magnets so kinda impossible to be separated without being pulled apart. when the strawhats went off to do their own things, luffy and Z somehow come across each other and it's like "stop following me!" / "you're the one following me!"

neither share what adventures they had and neither cared enough to ask. though Z was a little curious about who ace was and luffy bluntly says that theres nothing to know now bc hes dead. Z was about to pry bc ace had to be important to luffy but then again why should he care about this guy? he didnt care much about luffy and he was gonna leave soon anyway so they just left it at that. and as luffy gets distracted by a beetle on a tree trunk, Z suddenly disappears.

at some point though, luffy knew there was something wrong if Z couldnt just leave the place and people he claims to hate. and Z was startled by luffy's sudden interest in him and the island. he wasnt even sure if he could trust this pirate (esp when the 'rulers' were previously pirates !!) but he didnt feel ill intentions from luffy either so Z does tell him about the strict laws of the land which pisses him off gravely bc basically all of the people's freedoms are revoked and have to live a certain way if they wish to even live 👍👍

Z: "dunno why you're interested. you're gonna leave and forget about this hell of an island anyway. theres nothing you can do."

and again, Z cant trust others- especially not pirates. but the more time spent with the strawhats, the more respect and trust he gave. but he never once believed that they cared for him the same

#okay wow i have more ideas now that i typed this wtf #i honestly Just came up with everything on the spot and now im mmmgmhdhh i need to go into more detail #in my notes app at least #bc wow creating one piece characters are hard #especially if theyre gonna interact with the strawhats i feel crazy #and making up a whole new island w lore too #just a lot of thought to put into... crazy #tin talks #tinukis oc #but i am more excited now to show Z soon #one piece oc

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studentbyday · 9 months

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me @the stuff i have to do this week

day 50-56 // 100dop && day 29-35 // 100doc

saturday/sunday: finished lab report and data structures lab, spent what felt like a really long time trying to understand the instructions and distro code for speller.c and wrote lots of notes and some pseudocode for the load function.

monday: finished 2 and a little bit of a 3rd section of chem chapter. wrote drafts for the load, check, and unload functions in speller.c but it's returning the opposite of what i should be getting. ☹️🧐

tuesday: it seems i have to accept that as the semester wears on, my study space will inevitably become very very messy with scrap paper (note to self to sift through them tmr and keep only what i need rn)... finished 2.5 sections of chem chapter but didn't take notes on everything yet (halfway through the chapter whooo 🙌). answered tutorial worksheet. also, for some reason i didn't have to change anything except for some minor things in unload and load and check50 works for everything now???? now all that's left to do is figure out why my size function is not returning the same number as the staff's solution and improve on that dreaded hash function...everything i've tried so far takes longer than the one already in there... 🤔 in my impatience to move on, i started the python lecture (YAY PYTHON 😁💗 i'm so ready to be done with C for now)

wednesday: OMG i wasn't expecting to be able to finish speller today but i DID!!!! i thought it would take me much longer to figure out that hash function - i owe it all to cs50's reddit (and stepping away from it and doing smth else when stuck) 💗💗💗 now i can REALLY enjoy myself w python (my beloved XP) and not have that unfinished problem hanging over my head ☺️ also almost done making notes for the sections covered yesterday and finished 3/4 practice assignments.

thursday: i woke up at 12pm 😑☹️ finished all except 1 section of the assignment bc i haven't covered all of the chapter yet. i haven't even finished taking notes on...several things, it's kind of all over the place and i'm just trying to learn enough to do the assignment and then go back in more detail once i'm done bc that's how bored and overwhelmed i feel rn (did not know it was possible to feel both at the same time until uni XD) 😅 watched a little more of the python lecture even tho i should be prioritizing chem rn... still got the lab report to write and a quiz to do after the assignment 😵‍💫😑 (it'll be fine, ik, but if i'm being completely honest, it would be soooooo nice if those things could just do themselves and i could download all the info i need into my brain and instantly understand it and be calculator-fast at the math and not make any mistakes 😤)

friday: finished practice assignment, actual assignment, writing all of the lab report except the intro and references, and the python lecture. got through the remainder of the chem chapter but still gotta write notes on it... it was late at night when i got to the python problems and gaaahhhh coding is sm harder on a sleepy brain, i only finished hello.py XD also dunno how much time i'll have to spend on 100doc this weekend but at least i was able to keep up the streak through the weekdays this time!!

saturday/sunday: finished lab report, notes on chem chapter, quiz, and mario.py. am now working on credit.py and uuuggghhh i did not read the instructions carefully for the checksum!!! 😡 i just followed their example but not all credit card numbers are like the one in the example, so...i have to redo and rethink what seems like a lot of stuff so i basically just wasted all of that time getting confused as to why it wasn't working XD aaaannnddd idk if i should be doing this but i keep converting strings to ints back to strings and then back to ints as needed cuz i lovelovelove iterating through strings but also it seems kinda messy? it also feels super weird writing in python after writing in C for a while...

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bittercoldbrew · 6 months

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3,7, and 8!

Thank you darling T^T <3

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

Hahaha what a way to start, I'm feeling hesitant to answer honestly bc I think these things are embarrassingly telling about who I am as a person, but alas it can't be helped. Whether I intend to or not, I always seem to find myself writing protagonists with something to hide, some part of themself that they feel is dangerous or hideous enough that it must be kept secret from the world--and they always end up feeling completely uprooted by, and then madly in love with, any character who is able to see past the facade and find them lovable and worthwhile anyway.

Also I write about naps a lot. I think napping together is just like the pinnacle of human connection.

7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of?

God, I dunno, kind of....all of it? That sounds arrogant but idk, I don't really think of myself as a fanfic writer, I more write original fiction and then occasionally dabble in fanfic--which is incredibly frustrating because I've found it nearly impossible to get the kind of collaborative sharing/feedback back-and-forth for original stuff that you see with fanfic (and honestly it's rare to get that with fanfic these days anyway....)...... But all that's to say that when I do write fanfic I tend to build out the world a bit more than other writers do--sometimes parallel to the source material, sometimes tangentially instead--because I'm accustomed to building everything from scratch, and that's something that I think (hope? pray??) makes my work stand out to readers.

That said, right at this moment I think I'm feeling most fond toward the setting(s) of my Prospect (2018) fic, To Build Something New. The movie is entirely focused on a single location within a wider scifi universe, but my story takes place after the characters have left that location, and at the time of writing there was really very little info to go off of. There's quite a bit more floating around now, especially in the discord the creators of the film set up, but I'm really pleased with what I managed to come up with on my own. I think it feels really lived-in, which is always what I'm hoping for.

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

This is so hard!!! Omg okay hang on... I do occasionally make up playlists for certain stories or characters, but those are almost exclusively based on vibes more than actual relevance so I'm not sure. Obviously just about anything by Hozier works, but everybody knows that so let's see if I can't pull out a couple of surprises, and hopefully get more people listening to these artists too....

I love love love Rachel Chinouriri, especially for my Coral Island fic Tideline. I actually almost named that story Riptide after her song by the same name lol, but ultimately I didn't think that quite fit with the cozy feel of the game or the fic. Whenever I listen to her song Mama's Boy I always think of Rafael and my oc, Mika: "I'll tell you all the things I fell in love with first, / the stains on your shirt, / your eyes, your nose, your mouth / but I'm waiting for that smile to come back around..."

Also I've been listening to a lot of Mannequin Pussy lately, everyone should listen to more Mannequin Pussy. I don't have anything to write from them yet but I think Who You Are especially has potential, "I have a chain I wear around my neck / I did not choose my life, and I won't choose my death / oh here we are now, stuck between the two / don't you waste it"

These are all such great questions, thank you so much for asking!!!

#answered asks #thedragonagelesbian #cas* on every level except physical i am handing you a warm bowl of soup thank you ^3^#to build something new #prospect #tideline #coral island #my writing

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weebsinstash · 1 year

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Consider reading Steel Under Silk and The Ghost's Nocturne. Both are BL manhwa. Both are kinda similar to Painter of the Night (on the pairing being a Huge Strong Guy With Issues and a Massive Dick X Petite Man) and yet completeley different. Both have noncon. Both are available on bato. to! Steel Under Silk is legit so good, I dont even wanna pitch it to you. The ML is *MWHAH* chefs kiss. You just have to read it and see for yourself. The art style on both are TOP TIER.

Man so like I was kind of indulging in this conversation with someone else earlier but, you know how there was like that cultural movement in like the 2000s onward where a lot of young women were uncritically consuming yaoi content and yeah there were definitely a lot of people being homophobic and fetishistic about it (legit I think the whole "yaoi is fine but yuri is gross" that was common for a lot of young girls was just internalized misogyny bc I was one of those kids and now I'm literally a queer person with a gender identity of Girl But Also Who Gives a Fuck) but like at the core of it it was younger folks being completely unbothered by queer media and even seeking it out, and then there was this reverse whiplash of "oh no only gay men can read these, if you read these you are gross/homophobic/racist" and it's like. I literally turned 26 the other week and even sometimes when im in YouTube shorts watching manhwa clips (believe it or not this can actually be a really good way to find more stories, some people make very high quality edits or clip and the algorithm will just eventually feed you manhwa shit nonstop) and whenever a BL story comes up, there's like, a sense of shame in my heart, like I gotta look away? "Like oh, better avoid that, consuming this media with gay men in it surely makes me fetishistic and creepy" and it's like, the queer community has not clawed its way to having some rights for us to pull this kinds inter-group othering like this 🤦‍♀️ im a fucking adult and im going to read these stories where dudes are gonna fuck and it doesn't mean a damn thing besides me wanting to see people getting Freak Nasty

But anyways yeah I will definitely add those to my recommended 👀 I think one thing I've been having to watch out for is that I will see a series and then I'll read the comments and it might be something like "dont read this, its extremely unhappy, the mc suffers constantly and the ending is sad" and its like. Yeah I like dark content but I have to be careful when it comes to stories that are kind of just straight up tragedy porn? Idk. Like. When I write dark content its kind of contained into like a one-shot or a story with a few chapters, it isn't extremely drawn out to the extent ive seen with a lot of manhwa. I had my eyes on "Broken Promise: Married Man" or whatever the fuck its called bwcause it looked like it had some kinky stuff in it and then I look into it a little and almost everyone was saying "oh no dude don't read this unless you have a strong heart, bad shit CONSTANTLY happens, this man SUFFERS"

Idk its just, sometimes it can be hard to find my personal limits with that kind of thing 🥺 I don't think I've ever dropped anything for messing me up or anything but there are times I've read fanfictions and it made me like depressed the whole day 😅 the hunt for good stories constantly continues!

Also. It isn't a BL but ive heard Finding Camelia is good? It's a manhwa about a girl who is forced to live as a boy because she's the only heir to her family or something and she has to go through a journey of self growth and learn to feel good as herself and a girl again? I dunno, i don't know many details about it but ive seen a lot of people recommend it. Honestly I'm trying not to start too many stories at once but like I can't stop, I find a good story, start reading, oh wait it isn't complete, better find a another story, oh wait it isn't complete, wash rinse repeat ykwim

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itssideria · 2 years

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hmmmmmm i dunno if this is a take that's been more common these last few months or if it's just a few posts that got too popular, but i've been seeing a lot of fans who seem to enjoy... hating the dream smp? i've seen SO much stuff along the lines of "can this just end so i can stop watching it"/"x character is the only redeemable thing left"/"i don't know why i'm still here"/LOTS of writing crit that is more bullying than it is constructive

and!! well!!! i wanna counteract that!!! bc i think a lot of us have forgotten what makes the smp so special. like, remember the start of it? at a time in history when all popular media was tropey bad hollywood, or poorly written netflix, or capitalist ceos maximising on hollow rehashed uninspiring tales—when every piece of media on earth is censored or altered or otherwise made palatable—the dream smp was there. loud and bold and new—and so much FUN, dammit!! remember why we loved it? because it was fun! because it was a bunch of friends having fun! friends that weren't tied to a parent company, that weren't forced to write or say anything at all, and did it anyway—for fun, for love, for the joy of entertaining their viewers. it was silly and messy and dramatic and ripped from hamilton and breaking bad and everyone loved it, everyone put on the lmanberg skin and enchanted their gear and got ready for war. like yeah the dream smp is brilliant acting/portrayal/whatever, but we can get that anywhere else. what the dream smp had, and continues to have above all else, is that it's fun. you can tell the creators love doing it, even though they don't have to. it's got actual heart to it. people love watching it. i love watching it!! i love that it's messy and retconned and so clearly a mosaic of a dozen or so amateur writers trying to do the best they can!! i love how hard they try to make it good—seeking out inspo from fan designs, working with people outside of the cast, coming up with things they find interesting or new. and i j—the dream smp above all else to me is fun. and a lot of people seem to have lost that. it shouldnt be painful for you to watch, yknow? it shouldn't piss you off so much that you're desperate for it to end. this is a story that sprung up in the middle of some of the most dreadful events any of us ever experienced—and when it did, it made quarantine something worth remembering. and i'll always cherish that. ofc people are allowed to feel what they want to feel, but. i think we all sometimes need to remember that this silly minecraft roleplay is here to be the weird silly lovely messed up thing it is, yknow? i think we need to love it for its messiness again. i think we need to remember to have fun

#mari talks #dream smp #dsmp #dont mind me just trying to both soread positivity and admonish the hate ive been seeing all around #i love the smp so much for the passion it gave me when i found it #snd how funny and silly it is #and i never want us to forget that

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demonsfate · 7 months

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I remember the whole Xiaoyu/Heihachi debate on the Tek subreddit as well. I always thought some people got weirdly defensive about that even though you had some great (and valid) points. It's like they become blind when the same logic applies to other characters/situations. And that's why I don't like seeing arguments on the Tek6!Jin topic bc I know I'm not gonna like what I see.. like people will say "yeah well *I* Like this Jin and I'm a Jin fan!!! He's never been a goody-two-shoes hero!!" If you like him in 6 that's all fine and dandy but truth is Jin was never like his dad at all and they tried to make him Kazuya 2.0 but they don't see that lol

I really dunno why there were some who got defensive about that. I guess 'cos there are a lot of Heihachi fans. But my point wasn't even entirely about how Xiao was affectionately a child abuser, power hungry, selfish, criminal "grandpa" and crying over his "death." But I was also just saying how it conflicted with her Tek4 depiction/story where she was becoming very suspicious of Heihachi after the email she received from Jin. It showed that Xiao, despite being seemingly childish, has a good head on her shoulders, and can be quite smart. Although never said, considering that Jin had disappeared for 2 years, and had sent her that email out of nowhere - she likely put two and two together and figured Heihachi had something to do with Jin's disappearance. Even if her ending is noncanon in Tek4, it's still bizarre for her to go back to being "I LOVE GRANPA HEIHACHI!!!" in Tek5. Though, Tek5 amped up her immaturity and naivety A LOT. I'm glad it seeeeems like they may be fixing that in Tek8? Hopefully.

When it comes to other websites, I am pretty much done with arguments about Tek6!Jin. I'll bitch about it here because Jin's an important character to me. But like, it really is pointless arguing with most ppl most of the time just because it's always the same. It's either what you said, or "well it happened so it's canon and that's just what Jin is now." OR worse "Jin's a Mishima and they're all bad so he was never really good based solely on that and not anything else his character has ever done." I understand maybe being interested in stories where there are "no good guys" - but that just wasn't what Jin was intended to be (idc what Harada had tried to say in the past)

Any argument about Jin's characterization in Tek6 can be shot down fast just by showing how he acted in the previous games, like I did a week or two ago, and how they're complete contrasts. Even if ""character development"" exists - there's no way Jin would've changed that suddenly and that differently. It's unnatural.

Anyway, people can like whatever they want. We're all entitled to our own opinions. But like, Tek6 is the opposite of why I fell in love with Jin's character. But beyond the issue of Jin being out of character and the "bad guy," he's just a bad character in Tek6. The writing for him was sloppy and inconsistent. His goals are ridiculous and farfetched, and has you coming up with better alternatives than starting a war. His characterization is all over the place as he'll go from "I'm going to mercilessly kill you, go fuck yourself and your dead family" to "I had no choice but to do this, I feel guilty about it, but what else could I have done?" Although lots of ppl point out his goals of ""saving the world"" from Azazel, as well as curing the devil gene, most people forget that he also did this because of CORRUPT GOVERNMENTS. Yes, there's a part in the game where he actually tells Lars that he took control over nations because "government bad" and that the people are terrified of those who rule with an iron fist. Because you know, Jin isn't just another tyrant ruling with an iron fist - in fact, even MORE merciless than the leaders of the world given that he's completely taken over the world and hasn't shown a lick of compassion towards anyone but his own goals. He doesn't even fake compassion ffs. It just SHOWS you how messy his character was even if we ignore what the character was before. It also further confirms that, yes, there was definitely creative differences regarding the character in the writing room.

#✏️ - ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏsᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ // (ooc)#✏️ - ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ? // (inbox)

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skypied · 1 year

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AO3 Wrapped Questions!

3, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 16, 20, 27, 28, 29, 30 :)

I'm guessing wrapped implies "works from this year" so I'm only going off those! Buckle uuuuup this is getting looooong like always

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

Hmmm, maybe Back Home. Most of my fics this year feel like mindless brain dumps, but this feels more like a complete work.

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

Probably hard feelings? It generally has a lot less hits and kudos than most my other work, probably because of it being angst without a happy ending (YET), but through the months it's gotten a lot of very sweet and heartfelt and/or heartbreaking comments.

Back Home also got a lot more feedback than expected - it was one of those venting fics that I didn't really expect to resonate and/or not be enjoyed by anyone else but me.

6. Favorite title you used

Hmmmmmmmm , I don't really think any of my titles this year stand out :p Maybe Catch of the Day, just bc it's so stupid.

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

Most my titles from this year weren't song titles actually! Surprising, since I used to exclusively use song lyrics. There's only hard feelings (Lorde) and Can't Help It, I'm Obsessed (Sam Riggs).

(In 2021 we had Orla Gartland, Lizzo, Troye Sivan, Taylor Swift, Halsey and Maria Mena. Taylor and Maria were used twice: so they win. I think Maria would win overall for how many times her lyrics have been direct inspiration.)

10. What work was the quickest to write?

Probably a tie between the first chapter of hard feelings (started at like 10 in the morning when I was supposed to work, lol) - and Home (written while perched on the kitchen counter watching onions caramellize for onion soup). Both were around four hours, maybe one or two more for revisions.

Wait, actually, both chapters of Catch of the Day were mostly written in an hour or two each.

11. What work took you the longest to write?

Depends on whether you count hours spent on it, or stretch of time it took to finish it haha.

I do have wips I started last summer. Most of them are probably never gonna be anything. But I do have a wip that's almost done and I still intend to finish that I began... 14 months ago. oops.

But among published work - the ones that took the longest stretch of time is probably undertow and chapter two of hard feelings. According to docs, I began undertow on Christmas Eve last year (damn, didn't I have anything better to do?), so it tooooook... almost nine months? It's also kind of a mashup between three aimless wips that I eventually figured out went well enough to just patch together. hard feelings part two took seven months.

Most hours spent on it is harder to gauge, but maybe Can't Help It, I'm Obsessed. I remember I spent most my free time on it for maybe two-three weeks. (And then Annie kindly and graciously and perfectly finished it for me, thank god; I'd gotten myself in a real rut with it.)

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

Oh I dunno. Most are generic things like genre, established relationship and aged-up characters. The only one that sticks out is probably Alberto Scorfano has ADHD.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

Prrrroooobably Trust Fall! I think it's just sweet and neat.

27. What do you listen to while writing?

That goes in cycles. Sometimes a playlist with classical music mixed in with movie soundtracks. Sometimes just whatever album I'm hooked on at the moment. I have some specific music for specific things, most are one song I'll loop for hours:

Downtown (feat Pri Pach) by BYOR, VINNE, Pri Pach. It's SO good for hyperfixating and writing smut 2am on a weekday. (Been a while since I did that, though.) There’s a reason it was my #1 on Spotify Wrapped last year, and #2 this year.

IDFC (feat. Ravenna Golden) by WHIPPED CREAM, Perto, Ravenna Golden. Same as Downtown. It tingles my brain.

River by Bishop Briggs. Great for emotionally charged and angsty smut.

I've spent HOOOOOURS listening to just 22:12 Until The End of Time from the Haven soundtrack while writing, no specific genre.

I generally listen a lot to Kevin Atwater to get into those Sad Boy Feelings (especially when writing about Alberto being too brainwashed by Christianity to admit his feelings for Luca. God I still love that AU, shame it's never getting finished.)

Lately I've been rewatching TV shows while writing, just to have something moving on the screen and something to listen to.

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

Hmm hmm hmmmmm, feel like I'm repeating myself here but Back Home and hard feelings. Both feel like is the first complete stories I wrote. Most my stuff is just scenes, this was the first that spanned over a longer time and connected themes together.

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

Ahhh idk if I have the patience to reread all 50k I published this year, so I'm taking a couple that come to mind:

It’s stupid and predictable and sometimes Luca wonders when they’ll tire of this, when the intensity of the teenage crush will fade into something more mature, as his mother used to sigh when they were chasing each other’s tails around the bay. It’s been years, and he’s starting to suspect this is just what they’re like, perpetually snickering like kids breaking curfew, whispering secrets in a blanket fort and constantly one-upping each other.

from Morning Routines. The whole fic is stupid, silly fun, but I feel like this passage sums up their relationship in a cute way.

You know him like the back of your hand, but he’s scarily good at slipping under your skin to hide. You convince yourself otherwise, but you can never really tell. Not really. But it’s yet another trust you have to fall into, accept the rush of gravity and hope he catches you.

Trust Fall, chapter one

He looks at you, breathless and disbelieving. Disbelieving your love for him. When it’s the only thing you truly believe in, when nothing in this chaotic world makes sense without him, when it’s the seam keeping your life stitched together.

You wish he could reach inside your chest, clench your heart tight and feel that it’s more his than your own. You wish you could put your mouth to his ear like a conch shell, and he’d hear the ceaseless waves that lap in the back of your mind whispering his name. You wish he could feel the magnetic pull from somewhere deep in your guts that makes you unable to stop orbiting him.

You don’t dare imagine what would happen if he stopped letting you love him.

Trust fall, chapter two

Both of these from Trust Fall are some of the rare instances that I feel like I’ve written analogies that feel complete and make sense for them and the work itself.

You stare up like you used to, towards the incomprehensible lights of celestial bodies dancing on the surface, towards the never-ending fantasies of freedom forever pulling you towards the next horizon. Except now there is an anchor wrapped up in your tail, with a low, humming purr filling your body and quieting the restless whisper in the undercurrent of your blood and gentle claws tracing patterns over your ribs, all brazen ferociousness gone for listless limbs and a sleepy murmur whenever you shift.

There’s still a pull, a need to see, try, explore more. But maybe you don’t need to leave everything behind to feel free.

from undertow. I feel like this is the closest I’ll come to writing something about Luca’s “teenage rebellion” need for freedom that might lead him to neglect friendships/relationships for fear of being smothered again, and becoming comfortable with intimacy and vulnerability and being tied down.

Also this line:

You don’t want him to be in love with you unless it hurts.

This whole thing from ch2 of Back Home:

“Do you still love me?” you ask again, but now your breath is slow and calm because you know the answer. But you have to ask. Just in case.

You know the answer because he’s ripped your heart out and sown it back together; replaced old, festering scabs with gossamer threads of promises and gently placed it back inside. It’s still a fragile, ugly patchwork, but he’ll keep replacing bits and pieces of old hurt with new hope until it’s whole. You know it because he has scratch marks and bruises down his back and neck colored by your love and rage, because he lets you ruin him to save yourself.

You know it because you believe him more than you believe yourself.

“More than anything,” he says in a firm voice, as if it’s a fact as natural and definite as the sun rising and setting. He picks the smoldering stardust off the floor, breathes life back into the stars and places them back into your eyes. He smothers the flaming rage in your veins and replaces your blood with love. Because he loves you. You love him too. You love him more than anything and it hurts more than anything. But it’s worth it for the blissful, warm silence when he looks at you and you know he’s seen everything inside you and still he wants to. He makes your heart into a home and you let him. No matter how many times you tear it down in all-consuming fits of rage, he puts it back in order and you let him. He wants to make you better and you want to let him.

yayyy I love breaking Alberto and putting him back together again<3

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

Maybe how drastic the shift from only writing smut to never writing smut was? haha. Dgmw, I still write smut, but I just... don't finish it. Idk, it always ends up pushing up against things I'm uncomfortable with, or I write myself into corners. I feel like they're always things that aren't really a big deal, but they turn into massive hurdles in my head. And while writing smut is fun, I eventually end up feeling like I'm just writing the same things over and over. Which, y'know, is still fun and doesn't mean it's not valuable! I guess I just get really self-conscious over baring my ass on the internet.

On a more positive note, I think I've managed to keep a bit more distance to my writing. I do often get stuck with writing, and that frustration used to encompass everything and be... not great for me mentally. I used to obsess a lot more about feedback and get really bummed out about "underperforming" works and compare myself a lot to others. Now it's more like... I just chuck stuff I think is neat up on AO3 and don't think much more of it.

I’ve also experimented a lot more with style than I expected, and I guess found my voice a bit more!

ALSO how much Luca POV I’ve written. I still feel like I don’t understand the guy, but he’s fun to write. Alberto POV tends to become ... dark, lol.

#skypieposts #ty for asking! <3 #as always i ramble!

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no-shxme · 2 years

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if you feel like giving a stuck writer advice.... how do you get inspiration when head no work right or produce the right words

hey anon, sorry to hear about mush brain :C my advice is scattered but i'll list what helps for me. it's long because im verbose, i hope you dont mind. skip around or whatever (SOB)

something that might help is literally writing about that shitty writer's block feeling. i dont know about you but when i write i usually have to write towards something. usually i have a fragment of a sentence or scene that i want to get to, or just a mood, etc--as specific or unspecific as possible. Then its simply a matter of spewing enough words to get there. I'm not sure what you're trying to write (or maybe you dont have an idea, i'll get to that) but if you're looking to warm up and loosen some brain cells and you can't think of where to go with your words then you could always write about how your head-no-work. cause that's a very powerful and potent feeling in itself. i dont worry about a full scene or anything, just spitting some words on the page about how im feeling, or a character that's feeling the same thing, is often enough to spark more. i think too often people get stuck in their writer's block bc it understandably SUCKS, but there's often something to be explored there, in a good way.

sometimes to get inspiration or get out of a funk i have to really switch things up. i listen to new music or stuff that i haven't listened to in a loooong time. i'll read a book or a comic or ill go look at some pretty art and see if anything clicks. adding to that, a break can really help. a day or two or a week or whatever where you tell yourself that you're absolutely not allowed to write anything. a break! usually i can do that for a day or half a day and then i'll be good to go. (that's also because i write every single day so writing is very much a habit for me, which helps. if it takes longer then that's okay.)

opposite of this, sometimes i'm especially desperate to get something done so i just brute force it. i dont really believe in only doing something when inspiration strikes, (though inspiration is helpful and so are breaks) so sometimes i just throw up all over the page. the worst dogshit ive ever read. and that's ok, because at least it's on the page and not trapped in your brain. even if it's literally just a summary of what happens in the scene. you can always go back later and add more/flesh it out/etc.

back to idea generating. sometimes if im out of juice i literally just take something i already like (movie, book, trope, for example: indiana jones) then plug characters into it (ff or otherwise), and then just twist said material until it becomes its own thing. usually the characters will do that themselves. for example. if i inserted sett and talon into a jungle traversing indiana jones au i know just based on their characters that there'd be friction, so we'd already be looking at conflicted allies (since i want them to be allies). but then you ask, how would they even be allies in the first place? logically i decide that they must want the same single objective in order to work together in an uneasy alliance, even if i havent yet figured out what that objective is. that's a start. then i can begin thinking about that dynamic and how itd work and how i can still generate tension. thats how i end up with the idea of them handcuffed together, both fighting over the same objective even tho they both don't get along. that was a really long winded way of me saying that sometimes writing character focused stories/fanfiction can get you bogged up because it's hard to get your character to do something. it can feel like a slog. dunno if you're having that problem or not but sometimes i gotta take a step back and figure out if there's a better way for my character to do things. i try not to force anything and think about how a character would actually approach a situation and then a scene pretty much writes itself. for comparison, my train of thought for building scenes isn't "character Y is going to do xyz and abc." instead it's "these are my goals for character Y, now how do they GET there?" and designing the plot around that. which i guess doesn't' seem like that much of a difference but,, imo it's a big one. maybe that doesn't apply to you, in which case ignore it lksfdjjklfsd.

uhh i know i have other tidbits or crumbs or whatever but this is what i can think of off the top of my head. i know those mucky muddy brain times are such a struggle so maybe something here can help. just know that it'll pass, eventually! whether you take a break, brute force it, fight it, etc. everyone's different, don't be discouraged! and remember that even dogshit on a page is better than nothing. there's no rule saying you can't revise your own stuff 15 hundred bajillion times. good luck anon!

#shx answer #long post #i know i word vomit but i hope it helps dsfjkljkflsdajkflsd #or at least is useful in some way #AHHHGHH feel free to lemme know if something else works im curious okay

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cheswirls · 2 years

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god i realize i am going on but one more and then i'll b done for the night

i think it's been rly good of me to start a bunch of stuff this summer and decide to wait to post any of it until it's complete. like i keep thinking how weird n unproductive ive been bc i haven't written and published a work to ao3 since pdf in june and then i think abt it and im like. no wait. i have over 30k for one au i started and it's still not out of the intro section. ive written a shit ton of notes for fics and then have gotten a decent word count on actual prose (5-10k) plus that.

and it's not like i haven't been writing?? and it's been easier to breathe bc i feel like i post smth (to ao3 specifically) and then sit and wait and live and breathe for some sort of feedback for days on end and then get so worked up and disappointed when it doesn't happen. plus i feel like when i post fics in progress i lose motivation for them faster but also i feel like i have to be committed to what i post. it's easier to sit and puzzle things out and decide i don't like and need to delete whole sections vs posting a chapter and not liking it as much a month or week or x amt of time later. it's jus better?? like it's jus been better. this is a better way to write .

and if i absolutely am in a mood where i need to post smth ill jus drop it here on tumblr and it's a done deal. like this is a place where nothing needs to be perfect and i can always go back later and delete a post and move on. and it's good like this. like i feel like i got so frustrated at the start of summer bc of this one fic but that led to me deciding i didn't need to post anything in-progress anymore which has been a rly good decision so far so. worth dealing w that ig.

but it's also kinda. hard. like it's not perfect esp since i don't get the traction i do on tumblr that i do on ao3. but at the same time ik if i upload a fic im gonna make myself sick and miserable fretting over it and im done w that. im done. that doesn't mean that i won't post any more updates to fics i have up now that are in progress bc they're already up. jus that. right now at least. anything new had to be done completely. which means if i wait longer that'll have to be fine and when i get antsy or tired i'll throw smth up here. i write drabbles n stuff all the time i jus never post them publicly as much as i could. like what's been going on the past week-ish could be normal i jus usually don't have a high level of confidence until i let smth sit for a while.

hhhhh dunno where im going w this anymore.

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sleepingbutawake · 2 years

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okay so imagine a scenario where mc is fangirling (?) over kpop idols or an artist in general, celebrating their comeback. Then the om! brothers walks in and they’re like 🧍 “mc, who are those people and why are you screaming”

I don’t know if you like kpop or anything in that sort so, it’s okay if you skip this request!! love your work regardless<3 have a great day :D

Thank you for this request, swan-chan! I had fun while writing this! I cant really say im into k-pop but i like some of the songs. I didnt use any name of artist so i'll let that live up to your imagination. Have a great day too hun!

Obey me brothers react to mc fangirling over comeback of their favorite artist

______________

Scenario

______________

Just a normal breakfast. And with normal breakfast comes normal (key word: normal) conversation.

"MC, what did you take this morning?" Belphie asks somehow sensing you're about to blow.

"I just checked my human world phone this morning..."

"That isnt a think you need to scream so loud about." Mammon said still traumatized with how he went to call you for breakfast but you jumpscared him. And when i mean jumpscared i mean you scared the shit out of him. Poor greedy boy, but serves him right! He somehow needs to learn how to knock, this way or another.

"Its not bc of my phone... Its bc of a notification that popped there."

"And what was so scream-making at it?" Beel asks stuffing his mouth with his pancakes.

"Yeah you're not Levi." Asmo says checking his D.D.D.

"Why do i feel offended?" Levi raises his head from his switch.

But then another scream came.

Satan choked on his tea and was now coughing to death.

Levi's switch flew up and hit Mammon on his head .

Belphie flinched so hard that he fell with the chair he was sitting on.

Beel didnt know what to do first. If he should pick up his food or his twin, but he decided to pick up his twin.

Asmo peeked from under the table observing if another unexpected scream will come or not.

Lucifer rushes to dinning room after he heard the scream, but MC seemed fine. His brothers on the other hand...

"Whats all this screaming about?" he asks.

"The human is possesed.." Asmo whispers looking at MC. Now all of the brothers are under the table, bc it seemed as the safest opinion, if MC decided to throw something.

"MC what do they mean with the 'human is possesed' ?" Lucifer turns to you.

"I dunno where did they get that from, im just happy and celebrating that my favorite artist is back."

"So you're screaming over some other human/s?!" Mammon is starting to get to his point.

"Ding ding! You're right. Oh gosh how i missed his/her/their songs!" MC stands from the table and goes back to their room.

Brothers are all just watching in ave as their human just walks off.

Lucifer just sighs.

"One peacefull breakfast. JUST ONE. IS IT TOO MUCH FOR ME TO ASK?!"

Requests are open

rules

#obey me shall we date #obey me x mc #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor

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isagisyoichi · 3 years

Text

YOU MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL!

SYNOPSIS: niko as your boyfriend

CHARACTERS INCLUDED: niko ikki aka my boyfriend hello

WARNINGS: swearing, pretend all the boys go to the same school and they're all friends for plot, normalize not writing serious boys as someone that practically hates their s/o and never opens up to them god bless, also no such thing as ooc since we dunno shit ab him so everything i say is law. SUPER LONG LOL, it's like 2k+ words 😭

A/N: i love my boyfriend and i'm v happy about all the attention he's getting (even if he will prob will b subbed out 👎) this was fun to write bc i think he would b very soft as bf and also i hate the notion that stoic and serious = boring and detached in a relationship. also first post w the new user yayyyy rip yoichisagis an end of an era for realsies.

FOR: fox anon my beloved this one is for u😩

it takes a while for you two to get together, just because niko wants to think things through and be sure he’s making the right decision, as well as him being naturally apprehensive about this whole dating thing.

when you do eventually start going out, keep in mind you're probably his first real anything, so-

niko needs to take it slow for the first month or so because he needs time to adjust and get used to being in a relationship.

when he gets comfortable around you, niko starts to talk a lot more.

niko starts to talk about his interests more-soccer, stem stuff (idc i'll die by my hc that he's a stem boy), etc. and niko's really happy that you're genuinely interested in what he has to say :)

and as your relationship progresses, niko becomes more inclined to share his inner thoughts.

“this song is so bad, i hate it and how it's everywhere,” like, babe that sucks, but what do you want me to do, take it off the radio myself? 😭

you find out that niko’s kind of a hater LOL, but it’s okay, because it means he can be himself around you <3 and the mini debates you have with each other are fun.

he’s someone you can take shopping with you if you need a solid second opinion.

“ikki, is this cute?” you niko as you adjust the shirt you tried on in the fitting room mirror.

“no.” he’s so straight up LOL. “the blue one from earlier was better.”

“this one?”

“yeah, that one. you look really pretty in it.”

ngl though, niko’s not much of a mall person. he'd just follow you around like a little puppy LOL, but he doesn't mind too much because it's for you.

communication is important to niko!!!!! he wants someone that he can have real conversation about the things that matter to him, so he rly makes an effort to have that kind of connection with you.

niko's naturally funny but he isn't aware that he is lol.

but when he does try, i feel like his humor comes in the form of sarcasm and dry wit. likes poking fun at you here and there with a lighthearted jab.

"you're so weird, y/n," is the most common one.

niko’s naturally closed off emotionally (male aquarius 😒) but i, personally, think he’d really try and push himself to be more open with you, especially if you expressed for him to do so </3

he'd be really appreciative of someone patient and understanding of the fact that he doesn't open up easily, though.

but eventually, you become the person closest to him- niko confides in you a lot, which he’s grateful for because he usually holds everything in.

not one for pda or other lovey-dovey things in public, other than the occasional holding of hands but behind closed doors, niko’s so soft around you, it’s like he’s a completely different person.

also, i feel like niko’s real handsy with you, i get the vibe he’s super touch starved 😭

although it does take him a while to get used to physical affection, once he has, niko cannot get enough. he’s always touching you when he has no real reason to.

(and because you're his first relationship, i feel like it’s just natural that niko’s going to be kind of clingy towards you.)

“you okay, ikki?” you ask as niko suddenly wraps his arms around your waist from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“mhm,” he mumbles. “just wanna be close to you.”

niko likes when you sit on his lap when he’s on his computer. you can have your arms wrapped around his neck, your head resting in the crook of his neck, or you could just be on your phone or whatever, it doesn’t matter, niko just likes you near him.

you guys don’t really talk to each other when you do this, aside from niko occasionally checking up on you and asking if you need anything from him.

but other than that, you guys just enjoy each other's touch in silence. it’s one of his favorite things to do with you.

however, if you start kissing him in the middle of whatever he’s doing and keep it up for long enough, niko will drop everything to make out with you right then and there (also one of his favorite things to do with you).

speaking of kissing- you kiss niko first.

niko would try to plan your guys first kiss out because he wants everything to be perfect.

but, he ends up taking forever to execute it because he keeps overthinking and you can only wait so long before kissing him, so you take matters into your own hands.

his kisses are sloppy and juvenile at the beginning, but he’s smart and learns quickly what you do and don’t like.

likes being kissed on his jaw and forehead the most :')

if the team ever happens to see niko kissing you, they're gonna be so annoying 😭

"yooo niko's making big moves ‼️" "my son's growing up on me!😩" "good job *pats on the back*" and niko is red all over as he drags you away from them, muttering about how childish and annoying they are 😭.

but, they're all very supportive of you guys, even if they're embarrassing as hell 🙄.

they even give niko relationship advice- which luckily, he doesn’t follow (most of the time), because, let’s be honest, if you're getting unsolicited dating tips from a bunch of teenage boys, it’s probably bad 😭.

you’re the only person niko shows his forehead to. just know that having the opportunity to see it means that niko trusts you more than anyone else :’)

repay his trust by kissing his forehead lovingly and showering him with compliments whenever you can !!!!!!!!!!

“y/n, why’re you so embarrassing,” niko says under his breath, blushing as you hold his face and litter soft kisses on his forehead, rambling about how cute he is.

always looks for you in the bleachers when he has a game and you’re always the first person he talks to after.

and the fact that you make an effort to come as often as you can means sooo much to him. definitely considers you to be his biggest fan.

real classy with nicknames- uses “my love/love,” and “darling,” the most.

his favorite petname from you is "pretty boy." gives him butterflies each time he hears it.

the first time you call him that, he's confused, but after you explain that being called pretty is basically the highest compliment a boy can receive, he gets all soft on you.

only uses instagram to like and comment on your pictures and that's it 😭.

comments stuff like “you're so pretty” and "beautiful," without any emojis because niko refuses to use them LOL.

remembers the compliments you give him! they help with his self esteem and i feel like he values your opinion a lot.

so, tell him all about how cute and smart and talented and hot and funny he is and how much you love him and he'll replay it in his head 24/7.

i think he prefers to be the big spoon, unless he's sad- then he really wants you to hold him.

niko gives me homebody vibes, so expect relaxed dates, but still nice, yk?

what i mean is niko's not gonna take you out to get gas station food and call it a day 😭 he's classier than that and he always puts in effort towards dates.

he always plans them ahead of time and takes into consideration what he thinks you'd enjoy. and he insists on paying 🤗.

but, niko always does something special for days like your birthday or an anniversary, like go somewhere fancy if you wanted to or buy a nice gift you've been eyeing for a while.

helps you with your schoolwork, 100%. most of the time niko tutors you because he wants you to actually learn the material, but if you're feeling lazy and just wanna get it over with, niko will just give you the answers.

this is a big deal because i love him and all but, niko gives me the vibe he's super stingy with his work 😭.

"this is the last time i'm going to just give you the answers, y/n." niko sighs out. "you have to start doing your homework by yourself."

niko's said that dozen of times but he's still giving you the answers free of charge. can you guys say #whipped 🤣?

LOL speaking of school, if you ever text him during class, i highly doubt that niko would entertain you 😭😭 (it's out of love, though)

y/n 💗: hiii baby imy 🥰

pretty boy: do your work, y/n.

y/n 💗: ALL I DID WAS SAY HI

pretty boy: pay attention.

y/n 💗: fine ur so lame 👎

pretty boy: whatever you say. i miss you too, by the way.

he likes to moves your hair out your face because he wants to see your pretty face better.

which is why you have to do the same with him 🥰!!!!!! makes him blush like crazy.

gets soooo soft when you post him or even take pictures of you and him together :') just the thought of you wanting to show him off makes him soooo happy.

he won't entertain you if you make a tiktok, though LOL. he's very stubborn in his belief that it's stupid.

just stands in the background with his arms crossed if you try to make him do a dance or something 😭 (he does think you look cute, though).

niko has such nice eyelashes but i doubt he's aware of it 'cause he's, y'know, a boy 🙄.

"my eyelashes are ... cute?" he questions. niko wasn't even aware that such a trivial thing like his eyelashes could be considered cute.

"yes, oh my god," you gush. "they're so long and nice, i wish mine were like that," you groan, examining yours through the camera of your phone.

"you're so weird, y/n," he says, a blush staining his cheeks. "your eyelashes are nicer," he mumbles as he kisses your forehead.

he's one of those people that prefers to be alone, but you're the exception. you know?

niko likes to keep to himself most of the time, but that whole thing doesn't apply to you, because he'd choose to be with you over being alone anytime :')

#THIS WAS SO LONG CHRKST #ilysmni i love you so much niko ikki #not a dating hc but i really thinkche has the kind of headphones that tsukki has 💀💀💀#niko ikki #niko ikki x reader #niko x reader #blue lock #bllk x reader #bllk #blue lock x reader #blue lock imagine #blue lock headcanons #bllk headcanons #niko ikki headcanons #niko ikki imagine #ikki niko #ikki niko x reader #bllk imagines

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ao3commentoftheday · 4 years

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Hi! I'm glad the asks are open again~ My question would be really, i dunno, sensitive bcs I'll be talking about mental illness and stuff, but I know I am not alone in this so I took this as an opportunity to ask: how do you write while dealing with a mental illness esp. depression? I am not searching for sort of a magic or something but I think I send this ask more so on the part that I want to know how ppl with this problem deal w/ it so I will feel less lonely. Anyways, thank you so much!

For me, “feeling less lonely” is the key. I’m not really posting much in the way of fanfic right now, but I do write with my bestie almost every day. We’re both fic writers at heart, so even though we’re RPing, we write in a fic style.

We’re co-creating stories in a way that really helps. I know that I don’t need to do all the “work” involved in plotting a story and working my way through it. Plus, we still surprise each other with where we take each thread. If I’m ever stuck, we talk it out. It’s a mutually supportive structure that helps me keep writing when I can’t do it on my own.

You might not want to co-write with someone else, but I think having someone to talk to can help. And it doesn’t have to be just about writing. My friend and I talk about non-fandom stuff all the time. Feeling less alone is so important, just like you said.

That helps with the emotional side of things, but if you’re looking for something more practical to get words on the page, I say lean in to whatever helps you most. For me, that means simpler plots and/or shorter fics. It means chapters that max out at 1200 words a lot of the time. It means writing for 5 minutes and watching youtube or netflix for 20 before writing again. It means not getting a beta and just posting my story as is.

Give yourself permission not to be “normal”. If you can only write when you’re awake with insomnia at 2am, then congrats. That’s your writing time. Don’t feel bad about it. If you can only “write” by dictating your story into a voice app on your phone, then that’s fine. Do it. Throw the rulebook out the window. The only rules that matter are the ones that help you write.

Also, try not to beat yourself up if you’re not able to write at all. You’re still a writer, even if you’re not writing anything in particular at the moment. Depression can’t take that away from you. ❤

#asks and answers #Anonymous

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cyancherub · 2 years

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USER CYANCHERUB YOU ARE INCREDIBLE- YOUR MIND!!!!! gunsmoke in mirrors killed me and brought me back like 4 times. from the beginning I was completely and utterly sucked in, I have never been this absorbed in a fanfic before. it's just like I was reading a full-length novel and you wrote it so well I not only watched everything happen, I felt like I was there. my heart was thumping, hands shaking, sweating, body trembling the whole way through. I felt the fear, desperation, excitement, all of it.

and can we talk about the smut? bc OH MY GOD. when kogami picked us up and held us up with only one arm and a hip???? I short circuited so bad. and so much teasing holy shit but every second of it was meaningful and worth it. the way you wrote kogami as so desperate but with so much self restraint was perfect. and the twists!!! holy shit the twists?? after he pulled the trigger I had to take a break and stare at the wall for a few minutes because it was so intense and I just??? I dunno but I needed to let that sink in. and then we got the aftercare scene, which was so incredibly sweet, and once that was over I couldn't do anything but sit and stare at the wall again for another 10 minutes.

AND THE DIALOGUE JASKLDJF especially those italicized lines holy fUCK. those crumbs you were feeding us were already amazing and then you went and did that FOR THE ENTIRE FIC. you have such a way with words, this felt like something that should be studied in a lit program and it was beautiful.

I don't think I'll ever get over this. you are so incredibly talented and this fic was a work of art. I actually finished reading like 12 hours ago but I just had so many feelings I needed to let them marinate a bit before I even attempted to talk about how great this is.

THERE ARE SPOILERS IN THIS ASK SO IF U SEE THIS TEXT BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE KEEP SCROLLING AKLSDLK

ok sorry i have to do that because i cant readmore asks LMAOO

BUT AHHHHHHHHH ! ! ! ! SORRY FOR THE LATE RESPONSE i wanted to wait until i could give this ask more attention but. IM SCREAMIGDNSSGLKLK i love this so much THANK U !!!!!! U ARE SO KIND ! ! !!

IM SO GLAD IT WAS IMMERSIVE ;v; that is always what i want to accomplish with my fics especially because they tend to be so long so i want to make sure the reader is sucked in. SO IT IS SO GREAT TO HEAR THAT !!!! im glad that you felt all the tension & the anxiety that the reader was feeling !!!! that was the goal i am so stoked to hear it !!

ASKLDKLALKLK my god the smut ..... i was going through it over that man !!!! when i was writing it i was just. LOSING MY MARBLES OVER HIM!!! yes ... i think he would be such a tease,, i mean i like all my men to tease BUT him in particular because he's really patient? i think he has the capacity for it. YES THE SELF RESTRAINT !!! he will put himself thru it ... a bit of a masochist if i may say so myself LMAOO. BUT AHHHHH omg,, YES the part right before the twist was so intense to write so im stoked that it came thru as intense as i intended !!!

(rest is under a readmore for spoilers ish?)

BUT EEEEE yes. what a babe. i think the aftercare with him would be nice .. very quiet and peaceful. IM GONNA TEAR MY HAIR OUT AKLSKL i want this man !! i just know he would take such good care of u.

A LIT PROGRAM IM SCREAMINGAKLLK can u imagine ... LMFAOOO but truly. i appreciate the kind words so much !!!! they are everything to meeee !!! ;____; im kissing you so much for this!!! THANK U FOR SENDING THIS i am going to cherish this ask forever !!!

#to cherub #anon #re: gunsmoke #gunsmoke spoilers #THANK YOUUUUUU #sniffles

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