#but I'm also not not saying that

[groenendaelfic]

Faroe Gone Final Chapter Sneak Peak

So there's still lots of editing I need to do before I can post the whole thing, but with tomorrow looming I thought I'd share something "happy" and "cheerful" to distract y'all.

Have fun reading the beginning of the final chapter and hope you enjoy! 😇

Simon doesn't know if it's the sudden fog, his tears, or the fact that all he wants to do is be a fool and turn back around again—the first one, definitely the first one—but he drives back to Tórshavn at almost a snail's pace.

It doesn't matter. He has well over a day until the ferry makes its return journey to Denmark and nothing else to do except go over his time with Wilhelm again and again, replaying the good times and the pleasurable times and wondering if he could have said or done anything to change the outcome of his journey—other than realizing that all of his feelings were mere nostalgic illusion and fantasy, which of course turned out to not be the case.

Quite the opposite. Real Wilhelm was so much more than what Simon made him out to be in his head. There's so much he's missed. So much he doesn't know yet and which he desperately wants to find out.

It hurts, and yet there's nothing else Simon can do, no other choice which wouldn't hurt more sooner or later.

No. Simon tried. He did the best he could and that is enough. It has to be enough.

Simon had to leave while he still could.

The road ahead of him is empty, no one else in sight. No people, no cars, no sheep. Nothing except the wet, cold fog swallowing up everything and a rushing noise in his ears which might be the wind or the ocean or Simon himself.

Simon blinks away another tear and keeps driving, turning up the heat and hoping it will help.

It doesn't.

On the next island he passes a camper van. It's parked, and Simon thinks he can make out a brave tourist trying to take a picture, but he isn't sure. It's not as if there's much to see except an endless wall of grayish white.

Maybe that's the fascination.

Wilhelm told him that there are thirty-seven words for fog in the Faroese language, and while Simon laughed and told him to stop kidding, he's sure he's already experienced half of them, and it's only been two days.

Okay, that might be an exaggeration, but contemplating the uselessness of taking pictures of fog is a lot more bearable than lingering on the fact that he'll never get to be with Wilhelm again, never feel that satisfied ache in his muscles, not like this, and really how long can a grown man cry before he's all out of tears?

Pretty long he guesses.

Simon once stopped Ayub's baby daughter from attempting a daring escape on all fours, and Simon swears she was crying forever. Not that he blames her.

Crying is cathartic if it's anything, but if she could produce that many tears because of nothing more than a foiled plan to explore the stairway, then how many will Simon be able to shed before he's all wrung out? He’s a lot taller than her after all and guaranteed to not forget the reason for his tears even after being presented with some candy.

Simon doesn't want to know.

Simon wants to keep driving through this fog forever, because all that's waiting for him at its end is the mundanity of his never-changing life and a scandal revealing the Crown Prince to have been the victim of underage revenge porn thanks to his second cousin and presumed successor, and that is guaranteed to make it worse, to drag Simon’s name back into public awareness.

He should probably call home and warn his mom, warn Sara, but facing them will be torture of an entirely different kind, and also the investigative journalist they chose is a good one, one bound to build a case and not blindly believe her sources before going public, so there is still time.

Not too much though, as there is an impending deadline if the Royal Court and the Prime Minister are to be believed, or at least Simon would really prefer news of August’s deeds to overshadow him being taken into the line of succession.

Not that he’s so naive as to think a mere article can do more than delay the proceedings at best—although one can always hope—and ideally the journalist and whoever else gets a say in choosing the right time will see it the same way, but all of that is still more than half a week away, so why burden his family before he absolutely has to?

No, he's not going to call home yet, but maybe he should reserve a room before he gets back to the capital.

He decides to do it the old fashioned way and pulls over at the next opportunity. A viewpoint, or so he presumes the sign a few meters away from him would tell him if only it was clear enough to see.

He wipes at his cheeks and opens his phone. There are plenty of options for him to stay at. Small, privately owned places, holiday homes with kitchens and living rooms, quaint little hotels doing their best to sell their Nordic, rustic charm to tourists wealthy enough to make it there, and of course a camping ground, because unlike Sweden, the Faroe Islands don't allow one to set up camp anywhere else.

Simon doesn't choose any of them. He wants a warm but bland room, boring and inoffensive and as likely to be in Tórshavn as on the other side of the world.

Something as far from Wilhelm's colorful and most definitely handmade and expensive wooden furniture as he can get, and so he books himself a room at the first—and only—international hotel chain he can find, something he'd never do otherwise, and pretends that he's looking forward to it. The hotel has a fitness center after all and well over a hundred rooms. Simon is almost going to feel like back home in Uppsala.

Not.

He sighs and makes sure he received a confirmation for his booking, before he throws his phone onto the passenger seat and sighs again.

Somehow, magically, or rather because he's on a windy archipelago in the middle of nowhere, the fog is starting to clear. He can see a few meters of grass now, and then a cliff, and below it the cold, dark ocean pretending at being calm.

Simon wants the fog back, but when has he ever gotten what he wanted, and by the time he's back on the road he swears he can see a tiny patch of blue sky up ahead.

The hotel is on the outskirts of town and exactly as impersonal as Simon hoped it would be. He isn't hungry, and so he goes straight to his room and falls face first into bed.

The sheets are white and the pillows are white and they smell bland and clean and inoffensive, nothing at all like Wilhelm, and why would they?

Simon hates them. Simon also hates the hotel, but it's not as if he's in the mood for sightseeing, and as he isn't willing to take a shower yet—what? He's alone, no one's going to smell him, and isn't that the entire problem?—all that's left to do is turn on the TV, because he's for sure not touching his phone again any time soon.

Not when that would mean having it confirmed with every passing minute that he was a fool to leave Wilhelm his number. Wilhelm isn't going to call, but Simon would rather live in denial for as long as he can.

The TV does not greet him with an info screen as Simon expected, but an English speaking news channel, the volume turned up way too loudly, and Simon turns it off again as fast as he can.

Wallowing in self pity it is then.

Unfortunately Simon's usual answer to bouts of self-pity—angrily jerking off to thoughts of Wilhelm—is not an option right now, because Wilhelm is the entire reason for his misery, and so he grudgingly reaches for his phone after all and starts up a game which would work much better on a computer screen.

He's just about to finish off the newest boss, when a text message pops up.

If I do it, it reads. Then can we

The sentence stops halfway through, and Simon almost has a heart attack.

The delay in his reaction is enough for him to be killed instead, but it's not as if Simon notices.

Wilhelm. It has to be Wilhelm.

He taps the message, and while that makes it larger, it doesn't change the words.

He almost calls Wilhelm back right away, because Wilhelm is swaying, is reconsidering, and Simon wants that, he wants it so bad, to have Wilhelm back in his arms and his life, but also Simon already told Wilhelm that he can't be the only reason Wilhelm returns, that this is a life changing decision if there was ever any, and that Wilhelm needs to make it for himself and not for a hope of them maybe working out, and so he doesn't.

Instead he waits an excruciating minute and then another, just in case Wilhelm wants to add something or pressed send too soon, but no further message follows.

Simon curses and swears and kicks up his feet, because now he has hope again and that is great, but also torture. He doesn't want Wilhelm to get the wrong impression, doesn't want him to think that Simon wouldn't be willing to pick right up where they left off if he could—in the bedroom that is, not when it comes to fighting—and maybe they could also go on a date which has been nineteen years in coming.

Simon wants that. Simon really wants that. How can he not, now that he's had a taste, has spent time with Wilhelm, just Wilhelm, has had breakfast with him and done chores with him and played with his dog. Simon wants Wilhelm back, now more so than ever.

Simon knows he's an idiot, thinking of romance and dating when he just left the love of his life behind, and even if he hadn't, a returning Wilhelm would have much different things on his mind. He'd have to. He'd have no other choice. Things like his dying mother and the throne and the public reacting to his return after ten years in exile.

Wilhelm wouldn't have time for Simon, no matter how much Wilhelm would want him. Not for weeks and not for months. Simon would have to sneak into an assortment of palaces with the eyes of the entire nation on nothing but them if he wanted any time with Wilhelm at all, and Simon wouldn't want that. Simon doesn't want secrecy and sneaking and lies. Not that'd even be an option, what with the press and curious bystanders everywhere.

There is another option of course. The only one Wilhelm would ever consider coming back for. The one which at first glance sounds perfect because it means being with Wilhelm and standing by his side. It would also mean giving up everything else in Simon's life though, but what has he really got to lose? Why stop being foolish now?

Wilhelm told Simon that he's it for him. Wilhelm loves him. Simon's already traveled across an ocean. What's one tiny text message compared to that? Why can't he be selfish just this once and fuck the risk and the idiocy and the fear of what will be in one year? In five? In ten?

It all might end in disaster, but it might also not, and why should he be miserable if there's even the slightest chance at some fleeting happiness. After all it's not as if the email Wilhelm sent isn't bound to upend Simon's life anyway, and it's not as if Wilhelm is actually going to come.

Simon wants to be happy.

Simon wants to be happy and now there's a chance for it and so why not take it? He's done stupider things before, like coming here in the first place, so he might as well go all the way.

He doesn't text Wilhelm a yes, doesn't make any promises. He texts one word and one word alone, followed by a number, the name of the hotel and his room number, and maybe that's the biggest promise of all.

He doesn't regret it. He couldn't stay, not without making his inevitable departure even worse, but now he's done his part and the ball is in Wilhelm's court, all the balls are, and Simon is here and waiting.

For a ferry. For Wilhelm. For the life they could have had.

Fuck.

#it was editing this #or throwing myself a pity party #because for the first time ever #I could attend all the Eurovision events live #with nothing stopping me except my own morals and conscious #so clearly I'm boycotting it all #and that's the easy choice #no pity party for me #hello editing #I'm not saying Simon is staying at the Hilton Garden Inn #but I'm also not not saying that #yes Faroe Gone will have a happy ending #faroe gone #young royals #young royals fic #fic snippet #wilmon #fic update

[starcurtain]

Alhaitham and Kaveh have hands down the funniest dynamic in Genshin Impact because it’s literally just:

Alhaitham: Hey, stop self-sabotaging.

Kaveh: You KICK Kaveh? You kick his feelings like a fungus?! Oh! Jail for Alhaitham! Jail for Alhaitham for One Thousand Years!!!!

#I'm not saying Kaveh is Miette #but I'm also not not saying that #Kaveh #Alhaitham #Genshin Impact #just dumb things that come to mind

[innytoes]

so uhm... hitman au came up in a chat this morning...

👉👈 would you... would you happen to have more in that incredible mind of yours for us?

Can I just tell you I did NOT tag any of this damn au properly so I spent like an hour trying to find it before giving up and googling my own damn tumblr with HITMAN RAY. (Yes I did go back and tag it now, fuck the blog search function.)

Okay but once Ray knows about the ghosts Julie is like... wow he caved really easily about the whole keeping secrets thing. And Reggie is like: yeah well we know his secrets.

Julie: please tell me it's not something gross.

The boys: AAAAHMN

Alex: your dad is secretly into the Great British Bake Off.

But they find out a way to communicate with Ray and tell him his secret is safe. And somehow, maybe through Willie, people in the ghost community who were murdered by people and want revenge get in contact with Ray and suddenly he's like, hitman slash vigilante justice guy. And he's like: boys, I know you're trying to help but also I still need to afford the mortgage... OH MY GOD WHERE DID ALL THIS MONEY COME FROM.

Willie: Not Elon Musk's wallet, secret safe, safety deposit box, evil underground bunker, and couch cushions over the course of 2 months.

And Ray is like: eh, good enough. So anyway you said her husband was a cop and that's why it was never investigated???

#hitman ray #julie and the phantoms #willie finds the ghosts and helps them do Ghost Heists to get the money #or sometimes he and alex go on ghost heist dates #then Reggie communicates with Ray for them #it's a perfect side hustle #listen I'm not saying that Ray finds out a way to shoot ghosts and quietly takes care of Caleb for Julie and the boys #but I'm also NOT not saying that

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

saw a post about ai joel and i’ve gone too deep, got me blushing and twirling my hair at 3am

😂😂B R U H. You aren't alone don't worry. I'm too embarrassed to admit how deep I went in my little AI project, but just know that you're in good company lolol

#feel free to ask me about anything!! #asks #ai #joel miller #i'm not saying i made a scenario for every single pedro pascal character in the character.ai app #but i'm also not NOT saying that #send help

[wild-karrde]

🌹 💖❤️

*rubs hands together deviously*

Senna turned to face him, her nose grazing his in the dim light. His eyes seemed darker, and his breath was warm against her lips as he watched her, searching her gaze. Her brain screamed at her to stop, to push away from him, to not let herself get pulled under. 

But for once, she didn’t listen.

for every "🌹" received in my inbox i'll post one random sentence of a random WIP i'm currently writing

#karrde asks #ask game #wip ask game #not saying this is from the next chapter of IC #but I'm also not NOT saying that

[westanthewaterman]

Every morning I get up and check your account for new fics like I'm about to read the morning news--

Hehehe smut newspaper

#west whispers #anonie #i'm not saying something is coming out today #but i'm also not not saying that

[uppastthejelliclemoon]

AND IF I MAKE A RIDE THE CYCLONE AU WITH THE KITTENS WHAT THEN???

AND IF I MAKE JEMIMA JANE DOE???? W H A T T H E N

#IF I SOB???? THAT'S NO ONE'S BUSINESS???? #listen i'm not SAYING that the amusement park from the gothenburg non-rep is the amusement park from rtc #but i'm ALSO not not saying that #been listening to rtc nonstop so send asks abt the au <3 #cats the musical #ride the cyclone

[stargazing-enby]

Hii! I wanna go rare for the ship asks: James Sirius/Teddy and Blaise/Ron :D

Hi! Thanks for the ask! :D

James Sirius/Teddy Lupin:

Don’t Ship It

Why don’t you ship it?

I tend to like ships that have canon interactions that support them, and though I do make exceptions at random, this ship isn't one of them for some reason. I can see the appeal based off of their fanon characterisations, but it just doesn't interest me particularly!

What would have made you like it?

I don't think there's anything in canon that could've made me ship them because I just do not like next gen canon. Maybe the right fanfic could make me like them, though 😂

Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

It sounds like the kind of ship that can have a fun, refreshing, carefree dynamic, but also an angsty, morally grey, one-sided dynamic. So many scenarios to explore!

~

Blaise/Ron:

Don’t Ship It

Why don’t you ship it?

I've always felt like the ship was born out of people wanting the three (fanon) members of the opposing trios to be together (ie. Drarry, Pansmione, and Blaise/Ron). I don't really like the idea that Pansy, Blaise and Draco are an established trio to begin with (I understand Crabbe is dead post-war, but where is Goyle and why is he so often left out?) I'm also not particularly interested in the idea of shipping whole groups of friends with one another. Because of all this, my usual reaction when I encounter this ship is mild annoyance, which is a pity, because I'm sure I could've low-key liked the ship if I'd encountered it separately from the other two.

What would have made you like it?

Read above! Also, again, I'm sure a great fic could change my mind. A great fic is how I came to really ship Blaise and Ginny, after all (if you know, you know)

Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

Sounds like it could be really adorable, really hot, or really messed up! Again, lots of options to explore, which is always a bonus!

#Ask #Ask game #Ship ask game #I'm not saying Goyle is often left out because he's fat and his flaws aren't as easily excused by conventional sexiness... #But I'm also not not saying that

[scentedluminarysoul]

I don't like Disney's RL remakes. I think they are soulless cashgrabs and an insult. And I never liked The Little Mermaid, I find it highly problematic.

But

The new Arielle??? Looks so good???

But most importantly: It will mean SO MUCH to little kids who never see themselves as heroes!

Like her:

And every other kid in that thread. They deserve it!

#disney #arielle #the little mermaid #blm #i'm not saying she made me cry #but i'm also not not saying that

[the-very-rubiest]

Joel would try his best to safeguard his friends but if anything serious happened to them in the water he’d probably just panic and cry 🥺😭

Oh DEFINITELY. He'd freak out so hard, I doubt he'd be of much use aside from alerting every single person in the area who can help. Not to mention I'm not sure he'd have the necessary skills or knowledge in the first place, you may need a Tommi for that 🤔

After the successful rescue though? He'd go FULL mother hen. He would grab the injured bandmate and shake him and give him a full hour-long lecture that basically boils down to, "What the hell were you THINKING?!"

(Interrupted, of course, by furious hugs whenever he remembers just how glad he is that his friend is okay.)

#'do you know what could've happened? you could've been dead! do you WANT to give me a heart attack?' #interspersed with the occasional 'i'm so glad you're okay do not EVER do that again' #i'm not saying that's how he acted when olli played that show with a fever too #but i'm also not NOT saying that #ask #drippinlou #commentary

[captainjonnitkessler]

Sometimes I wish we would start calling out the performative radicalism on this site for the poser bullshit it is. "Remember, it's always morally correct to kill a cop!" "Don't forget to firebomb your local government office!" "Wow, it sure would be a shame if these instructions on how to make a molotov cocktail got spread around!"

Okay. But you're not killing cops or firebombing government offices. You are posting on a dying microblogging website to a carefully-curated echo chamber that has radicalized itself into thinking that taking the absolute most extreme position on any subject is praxis but that anyone discussing the most practical way to effect actual change is your sworn enemy. You do not have the street cred OR the activist cred to be talking about killing cops, babe.

#thinking about the person i saw saying that if you're at a protest #and other protesters try to stop you from becoming violent you should just kill them bc 'peace police are still police' #even taken as hyperbole that's simply dumb as shit on every conceivable level #it's also pretty blatantly hypocritical coming from people who are usually self-avowed prison/death penalty abolitionists #like i'm sorry but you don't get to be a death penalty abolitionist and also call for the death of your political enemies online #this isn't a major issue or anything i'm just bored and annoyed

[wearenotjustnumbers2]

Reminder that Palestinians in Gaza are being deliberately starved by Israel. Families in gaza are boiling plant leaves and eating them. They're also eating animals and birds food to stay alive. There are reported cases of kids and infants who died out of hunger and/ or cold. Starving people is part of genocide too. Remember how fast medicine was provided for the Israeli hostages, while Palestinians are starving for food and water and getting operations and amputations performed with no medication or anesthesia whatsoever.

#now before anyone says anything i think it's important that hostages get their medicine but i also think Palestinians should too #israel is fully capable of providing medication and food but chooses not to and that's what I'm talking about #palestine #gaza #israel #important #current events #free palestine #ethnic cleansing #free gaza #gaza strip #gaza under attack

[lastoneout]

Seein' too many Twitter refugees asking if they'll get in trouble for saying "kill yourself" to people and while no, you're not gonna get nuked from orbit, that is maybe something you just shouldn't be doing in general perhaps?? Maybe telling people to kill themselves is bad actually?? Some of y'all are wild, why is the first thing you can think to ask on a new platform if you can send one of the worst kinds of harassment to people?? Grow tf up and learn how to use the block button. It'll do wonders for your mood, trust me.

#this is the real cringe behavior #also you'll get reported if you do this it's actually against the rules #why do you want to do that?? #I've never felt the need to say that to anyone ever #is there a joke I'm missing out on like wtf is wrong with you #twitter #twitterpocalypse #suicide mention #ask to tag

[opalescent-apples]

hey what the fuck

#opal says words #stardew valley #Also ignore the fact that I'm dressed as a blobfish

[talaricula]

Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing à la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :

Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources

Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)

Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women

Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women

Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)

Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)

Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community

Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS

Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough

Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media

Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards

Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories

Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")

And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue

Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)

#Also I'm saying this as someone who actually watched quite a few of Somerton's videos #And noticed those patterns and stopped watching bc I recognised them from here #and had already learned to unlearn them after being so exposed to them here #And tbh I think anyone who hasn't had the luck or made the conscious choice to seek out ppl who pushed against those narratives #Would absolutely have fallen for this man's bullshit. Like let's not kid ourselves we see takes like this every day on this hellsite #2014 me would have. For sure. #This is next to the plagiarism issue which as Harris points out is an Internet wide issue and this includes tumblr #James Somerton #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows #This brought to you by a conversation with my wife yesterday #So many ppl on here don't deserve to meme or be this self absolvingly critical of this man #The call is coming from inside the house #The man has a tumblr it would legit not surprise me if some of the things he supposedly made up himself he did actually get from somewhere #And that somewhere was a tumblr post

[perfectlyripeclementine]

calling my lover "mine" but not in the way that my toothbrush or notebook are mine, mine in the way my neighborhood is mine, and also everybody else's, "mine" like mine to tend to, mine to care for, mine to love. "mine" not like possession but devotion.

#nonbinary love #nblnb yearning #nb4nb #nblnb #wholesomeposting #yearning hours #ive been thinking about how some languages dont have a possessive tense #so you dont say “i have a thing” but rather “a thing is by me” #and like im not usually one for psycho linguistics and like critical thoughts etc etc etc #but i really like the framework of responsibility/commitment rather than ownership #i think about this mostly in terms of ecology #and relation to land #but i also love it as it applies to language shared between lovers #like i LOVE calling them mine or for them to call me theirs #but i'm also nonmonog and that was kinda weird to square for a while #and it clicked one time when i was talking about my neighborhood and i was like well #when i say my neighborhood or my city it's understood i'm not taking it away from anybody else #its understood i just mean the city where i live #so why cant we apply the same to lovers? #mine in the way i want to show up for you again and again #ok #done now