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phantomrose96 · 2 months

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If anyone wants to know why every tech company in the world right now is clamoring for AI like drowned rats scrabbling to board a ship, I decided to make a post to explain what's happening.

(Disclaimer to start: I'm a software engineer who's been employed full time since 2018. I am not a historian nor an overconfident Youtube essayist, so this post is my working knowledge of what I see around me and the logical bridges between pieces.)

Okay anyway. The explanation starts further back than what's going on now. I'm gonna start with the year 2000. The Dot Com Bubble just spectacularly burst. The model of "we get the users first, we learn how to profit off them later" went out in a no-money-having bang (remember this, it will be relevant later). A lot of money was lost. A lot of people ended up out of a job. A lot of startup companies went under. Investors left with a sour taste in their mouth and, in general, investment in the internet stayed pretty cooled for that decade. This was, in my opinion, very good for the internet as it was an era not suffocating under the grip of mega-corporation oligarchs and was, instead, filled with Club Penguin and I Can Haz Cheezburger websites.

Then around the 2010-2012 years, a few things happened. Interest rates got low, and then lower. Facebook got huge. The iPhone took off. And suddenly there was a huge new potential market of internet users and phone-havers, and the cheap money was available to start backing new tech startup companies trying to hop on this opportunity. Companies like Uber, Netflix, and Amazon either started in this time, or hit their ramp-up in these years by shifting focus to the internet and apps.

Now, every start-up tech company dreaming of being the next big thing has one thing in common: they need to start off by getting themselves massively in debt. Because before you can turn a profit you need to first spend money on employees and spend money on equipment and spend money on data centers and spend money on advertising and spend money on scale and and and

But also, everyone wants to be on the ship for The Next Big Thing that takes off to the moon.

So there is a mutual interest between new tech companies, and venture capitalists who are willing to invest $$$ into said new tech companies. Because if the venture capitalists can identify a prize pig and get in early, that money could come back to them 100-fold or 1,000-fold. In fact it hardly matters if they invest in 10 or 20 total bust projects along the way to find that unicorn.

But also, becoming profitable takes time. And that might mean being in debt for a long long time before that rocket ship takes off to make everyone onboard a gazzilionaire.

But luckily, for tech startup bros and venture capitalists, being in debt in the 2010's was cheap, and it only got cheaper between 2010 and 2020. If people could secure loans for ~3% or 4% annual interest, well then a $100,000 loan only really costs $3,000 of interest a year to keep afloat. And if inflation is higher than that or at least similar, you're still beating the system.

So from 2010 through early 2022, times were good for tech companies. Startups could take off with massive growth, showing massive potential for something, and venture capitalists would throw infinite money at them in the hopes of pegging just one winner who will take off. And supporting the struggling investments or the long-haulers remained pretty cheap to keep funding.

You hear constantly about "Such and such app has 10-bazillion users gained over the last 10 years and has never once been profitable", yet the thing keeps chugging along because the investors backing it aren't stressed about the immediate future, and are still banking on that "eventually" when it learns how to really monetize its users and turn that profit.

The pandemic in 2020 took a magnifying-glass-in-the-sun effect to this, as EVERYTHING was forcibly turned online which pumped a ton of money and workers into tech investment. Simultaneously, money got really REALLY cheap, bottoming out with historic lows for interest rates.

Then the tide changed with the massive inflation that struck late 2021. Because this all-gas no-brakes state of things was also contributing to off-the-rails inflation (along with your standard-fare greedflation and price gouging, given the extremely convenient excuses of pandemic hardships and supply chain issues). The federal reserve whipped out interest rate hikes to try to curb this huge inflation, which is like a fire extinguisher dousing and suffocating your really-cool, actively-on-fire party where everyone else is burning but you're in the pool. And then they did this more, and then more. And the financial climate followed suit. And suddenly money was not cheap anymore, and new loans became expensive, because loans that used to compound at 2% a year are now compounding at 7 or 8% which, in the language of compounding, is a HUGE difference. A $100,000 loan at a 2% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, accrues to $121,899. A $100,000 loan at an 8% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, more than doubles to $215,892.

Now it is scary and risky to throw money at "could eventually be profitable" tech companies. Now investors are watching companies burn through their current funding and, when the companies come back asking for more, investors are tightening their coin purses instead. The bill is coming due. The free money is drying up and companies are under compounding pressure to produce a profit for their waiting investors who are now done waiting.

You get enshittification. You get quality going down and price going up. You get "now that you're a captive audience here, we're forcing ads or we're forcing subscriptions on you." Don't get me wrong, the plan was ALWAYS to monetize the users. It's just that it's come earlier than expected, with way more feet-to-the-fire than these companies were expecting. ESPECIALLY with Wall Street as the other factor in funding (public) companies, where Wall Street exhibits roughly the same temperament as a baby screaming crying upset that it's soiled its own diaper (maybe that's too mean a comparison to babies), and now companies are being put through the wringer for anything LESS than infinite growth that Wall Street demands of them.

Internal to the tech industry, you get MASSIVE wide-spread layoffs. You get an industry that used to be easy to land multiple job offers shriveling up and leaving recent graduates in a desperately awful situation where no company is hiring and the market is flooded with laid-off workers trying to get back on their feet.

Because those coin-purse-clutching investors DO love virtue-signaling efforts from companies that say "See! We're not being frivolous with your money! We only spend on the essentials." And this is true even for MASSIVE, PROFITABLE companies, because those companies' value is based on the Rich Person Feeling Graph (their stock) rather than the literal profit money. A company making a genuine gazillion dollars a year still tears through layoffs and freezes hiring and removes the free batteries from the printer room (totally not speaking from experience, surely) because the investors LOVE when you cut costs and take away employee perks. The "beer on tap, ping pong table in the common area" era of tech is drying up. And we're still unionless.

Never mind that last part.

And then in early 2023, AI (more specifically, Chat-GPT which is OpenAI's Large Language Model creation) tears its way into the tech scene with a meteor's amount of momentum. Here's Microsoft's prize pig, which it invested heavily in and is galivanting around the pig-show with, to the desperate jealousy and rapture of every other tech company and investor wishing it had that pig. And for the first time since the interest rate hikes, investors have dollar signs in their eyes, both venture capital and Wall Street alike. They're willing to restart the hose of money (even with the new risk) because this feels big enough for them to take the risk.

Now all these companies, who were in varying stages of sweating as their bill came due, or wringing their hands as their stock prices tanked, see a single glorious gold-plated rocket up out of here, the likes of which haven't been seen since the free money days. It's their ticket to buy time, and buy investors, and say "see THIS is what will wring money forth, finally, we promise, just let us show you."

To be clear, AI is NOT profitable yet. It's a money-sink. Perhaps a money-black-hole. But everyone in the space is so wowed by it that there is a wide-spread and powerful conviction that it will become profitable and earn its keep. (Let's be real, half of that profit "potential" is the promise of automating away jobs of pesky employees who peskily cost money.) It's a tech-space industrial revolution that will automate away skilled jobs, and getting in on the ground floor is the absolute best thing you can do to get your pie slice's worth.

It's the thing that will win investors back. It's the thing that will get the investment money coming in again (or, get it second-hand if the company can be the PROVIDER of something needed for AI, which other companies with venture-back will pay handsomely for). It's the thing companies are terrified of missing out on, lest it leave them utterly irrelevant in a future where not having AI-integration is like not having a mobile phone app for your company or not having a website.

So I guess to reiterate on my earlier point:

Drowned rats. Swimming to the one ship in sight.

#chrissy speaks #long post #-gestures broadly-

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felikatze · 5 months

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ISAT and Ludonarrative Harmony: Combat is a Storytelling Tool

Or: How Siffrin is stuck in the endgame grind, forever

Please Note: This is primarily aimed at an audience that already played In Stars and Time, because I am bad at explaining things, and it's good to already know what the fuck I'm talking about. I tend to only bring up game elements as I want to talk about them.

Spoilers for.... all of ISAT! Especially Act 5!

(image to show how i feel posting this and as an attention grabber over my wall of text)

To pull a definition of ludonarrative harmony out of a hat, game writer Lauryn Ash defines it as follows:

Ludonarrative harmony is when gameplay and story work together to create a meaningful and immersive experience. From a design implementation perspective, it is the synchronized interactions between in-game actions (mechanics) and in-world context (story).

It is, generally speaking, how well game mechanics work hand in hand with the story. I, personally, think ISAT is an absolute masterclass of it, so I want to take a look at how ISAT specifically uses its battle system to emphasize Siffrin's character arc and create organic story moments. I want you to keep this in mind when I talk here.

So, skills, right? If you've played any turn-based RPG, you know your Fire spells, your "BACKSLASH! AIRSLASH! BACKSLASH!" and the many ways to style those.

Well, what does casting "Fire" say about your character? Not all that much, does it? Perhaps you'll have typical divisions. The smart one is the mage, the big brawny one is your tank, the petite one's the healer. And that's the barebones of ISAT's main party, but it's much more than that.

Every character's style of combat tells you something about them. Odile, the Researcher, is the most well-travelled and knowledgable of the bunch. She's the one with the expertise to keep a cool head and analyze the enemy, yet also able to use all three of the Rock-Paper-Scissors craft types.

To reflect her analytical view of things, all her skill names are just descriptive, the closest to your most bog-standard RPG. "Slow IV" or "Paper III" serve well to describe their purpose. The high number of the skills gives the impression there were three other Slow skills beforehand - fitting, considering the party starts at level 45, about to head into the final dungeon. She's also the oldest, so she's the slowest of the bunch.

Isabea, the Fighter, has all his skills in exclamation points. "YOUR TURN!!!" "SO WEAK!!!" "SMASH!!!" they're straightforward, but excited. He's a purposefully cheerfull guy, so his skills revolve around cheering on his allies. He's absolutely pumped to be here, and you see that from his skill names alone.

Mirabelle, the Housemaiden, is an interesting case. She's by all means the true protagonist of this tale - She's the one "Chosen by the Change God," the only one who survived the King's first attack, the only one immune to his ability to freeze time, the only dual-craft type of the game - just a lot of things. And her skill names reflect that facade she puts on herself - she can do this, she can win! She has to believe it, or else she starts doubting. This is how you get "Jolly Round Rondo" and "Mega Sparkle Heal" or "Adorable Moving Cure." She's styled every bit a sailor scout shojo heroine, and her moveset replicates the naming conventions of "In the name of the moon, I'll punish you!"

Even Bonnie, the Kid, who can't be controlled in combat, has named craft skills. And they very much reflect that Bonnie is, well, a kid. "Wolf Speed Technique" or "Thousand Blows Technique" are very much the phrasings of a child who learned one complicated word and now wants to use it in everything to seem cooler than they are, which is none, because they're twelve.

Siffrin's skills are all puns.

You have an IMMEDIATE feel for personality here. Between "Knife to Meet You!" and "Too Cleaver by Half," you know Siffrin's the type to always crack a joke no matter the situation, slinging witticisms around to put Sonic the Hedgehog to shame. It's just such a clever way to establish character using a game mechanic as old as the entire history of RPGs.

This is only the baseline of the way the combat system feeds into the story, though.

The timeloop, of course, feeds into it. Siffrin is the only character who retains experience upon looping, whereas all other characters are reset to their base level and skills. And it sucks (affectionate).

You're extremely likely to battle more often the earlier in the game you are - after all, you need the experience (for now.) Every party member contributes, and Siffrin isn't all that strong on their own, since they focus on raw scissor type damage with the addition of one speed buff. (Of course it's a speed buff. They're a speedy fucker. Just look at him).

At first, the difference in level between Siffrin and the rest of the group is rather negligible. Just a level or two. Just a bit more speed and attack. And then Siffrin grows further and further apart. Siffrin keeps learning new skills. He gets a healing skill that doubles as an attack boost, taking away from both Mirabelle's and Isabeau's usefullness. He gets Craft skills of every type that even give you two jackpot points instead of one - thus obliterating Odile's niche. Siffrin turns into a one-person army capable of clearing most encounters all on their own.

Siffrin's combat progression is an exact mirror of story progression - as their experience inside the loops grows, they also grow further and further away from their party. The party seems... weaker, slower, clumsier. Always back at their starting point, just as all of their character arcs are reset each loop. Never advancing, always stagnant. And you have Siffrin as the comparison post right next to them.

I also want to point out here a change from Act 2 to Act 3 - Siffrin's battle portrait. He stops smiling.

Battles keep getting easier. This is true both for the reason that Siffrin keeps growing stronger even when all enemies stay the same, but also for the reason that you, the player, learn more about the battle system and the various encounters, until you've learned perfect boss clear strategies just from repetition. Have you ever watched a speedrunner play Pokemon? They've played this game so many times, they could do it blindfolded and sleeping. Your own knowledge and Siffrin's new strength work in tandem to trivialize the game's entire combat system as the game progresses.

(Is it still fun? Playing it over, and over, and over again? Is it?)

You and Siffrin are in sync, your experience making everything trivial.

As time goes on, Siffrin grows to care less and less about performing right for their party and more and more about going fast. A huge moment in his character is marked by the end of Act 3; because of story events I won't delve too deeply into, Siffrin has grown afraid of trying something new. And his options of escape are closing in. They need an answer, and they need it fast. He doesn't have the time or patience to dumb himself down, so you unlock one new skill.

It doesn't occur with level up, or with a quest, or anything at all. At the start of Act 4, it simply appears in Siffrin's Craft skills.

(Just attack.)

No pun. No joke. Just attack. Once you notice, the effect is immediate - here you have it, a clear sign of how jaded Siffrin has become, right at every encounter. And it's a damn good attack, too! The only available attack in the game that deals "massive" damage against all enemies. Because it doesn't add any jackpot points (at least, it's not supposed to), you set up a combo with everybody else, but Siffrin simply tears away at the enemy with wild abandon. Seperated from the rest of the party by the virtue of no longer needing to contribute to team attacks (most of the time. It's still useful if they do, though).

Once again, an aspect of the battle system enhances the degree of separation between Siffrin and the static characters of his play. You're incentivized to separate him, even.

Additionally, there are two more skills to learn. They're the only skills that replace previous skills. You only get them at extremely high levels, the latter of which I didn't even reach on both of my playthroughs.

The first, somewhere in the level 70 range, Rose Printed Glasses, a paper type craft skill, is replaced by Tear You Apart. It's still a pun about paper, but remarkedly more vicious.

The second is even more on the nose. At level 80, In A While, Rockodile!, a rock type craft skill, is replaced by the more powerful Rock Bottom.

I didn't get to level 80. If you do, you pretty much have to do it on purpose. You have to keep going much longer than necessary, as Siffrin is just done. And the last skill he learns is literally called Rock Bottom.

What do I even need to say, really.

Your party doesn't stay static forever, though.

By doing their hangout quests, side quests throughout the loops that result in Siffrin and the character having a heart to heart, all of them unlock what I'd call an "ultimate" skill. You know the type - the character achieved self-fulfillment, hit rank 10 on their confidant, maxed out their skill tree, and received a reward for their trouble.

These skills are massively useful. My favorite is Odile's - it makes one enemy weak to all Craft types for several turns, which basically allows you to invalidate the first and third boss, as well as just clown on the King, especially once Siffrin starts racking up damage.

But the thing is. In Act 3, when you first get them, yeah, they're useful. But... do you need them? After all, they're such a hassle to get. You need to do the whole character quest again, you can't loop forward in the House or you'll lose them. If you want to take these skills to the King, you need to commit. Go the full nine-yards and be nice to your friends and not die and not skip forward or skip back. Which is annoying, right?

Well, I sure did think so during Act 4. After all, a base level party can still defeat the King, just with a few more tricky pieces involved. Siffrin can oneshot almost all basic enemies by the time of Act 4. It's this exact evalutation that you, the player, go through everytime you return to Dormont. Do I want this skill, still? Would it not be faster to go on without it? I'm repeating myself, but that's the thing! That's what Siffrin is thinking, too!

I also want to take a quick moment to note, here - all skills gained from hangouts have art associated with them, which no other skills do. This feature, the nifty art, hammers home these as "special" skills, besides just how they're unlocked.

Siffrin also has one skill with associated art.

Yeah, you guessed it, it's (Just attack.)

At first, helping the characters is tied to a hefty in-game reward, but that reward loses its value, and in return devalues helping Siffrin's friends every loop. It's too tedious for a skill that'll make a boss go by one turn faster. You, the player, grow jaded with the battle system. Grinding experience isn't worth it, everybody's highest levels are already recorded. Fighting bosses isn't worth it, it's much faster to loop forward.

Isn't this what all endgame in video games looks like? You already beat the final boss, and now... what challenge is left? Is there a point to keep playing? Most games will have some post-game content. A superboss to test your skills against, but ISAT doesn't have any of that. You're forever left chasing to the post-game. That's the whole point - to escape the game.

As most games get more difficult as time passes, ISAT only gets easier. The game becomes disinterested in expanding its own mechanics just as I ran out of new things to fight after 100%-ing Kingdom Hearts 3. Every encounter becomes a simple game of "press button to win."

The final boss just takes that one up a notch.

Spoilers for Act 5 ahead boys!

In Act 5, Siffrin utterly loses it. His last possible hope for escape failed him, told him there's nothing she can do, and Siffrin is trapped for eternity. So of course, they go insane and run up the entire House without their party.

This just proves what you already knew - you dont need the party to proceed. Siffrin alone is strong enough. And here, Siffrin has entirely shed the facade of the jokester they used to be. Every single skill now follows the (Just attack.) naming conventions. Your skills are: (Paper.) (Rock.) (Scissors.) (Breathe.)

To the point. Not a moment wasted, because Siffrin can't take a moment longer of any of this. Additionally, his level is set to 99 and his equipment becomes fixed. You can't even pick up items anymore! Not that you needed them at this point anyway, right? Honestly, I never used any items besides the Salty Broth since Act 2, so I stopped picking items up a long time ago. Now you just literally can't.

Something I've not talked about until now - one of the main equipment types in this game are Memories, gained for completing subquests or specific interactions and events. They all by and large have little effects - make Odile's tonics heal more, or have Mirabelle cast a shield at the start of combat. For the hangout events, you also gain an associated memory that boosts the characters' stats by 30. It lets them keep up with Siffrin again! A fresh wind! Finally, your party members feel on par with you again!

...For a time. And just like that, they're irrelevant again, just as helping them gave Siffrin a brief moment of hope that the power of friendship could fix everything.

In Act 5, your memory is set to "Memory of Emptiness." It allows you to loop back in the middle of combat. You literally can't die anymore. Not that Siffrin could've died by this point in the first place, unless you forgot about the King's instant-kill attack. This one memory takes away the false pretense that combat ever had any stakes. Siffrin's level being set to 99 means even the scant exp you get is completely wasted on them. All stakes and benefits from combat have been removed. It has become utterly pointless.

Frustrating, right? It's an artistic frustration, though. It traps you right here in Siffrin's shoes, because he hates that all these blinding Sadnesses are still walking around just as much. It all inspires just a tiny fraction of that deep rolling anger Siffrin experiences here in the player.

And listen, it was cathartic, that one time Siffrin snapped and stabbed the tutorial Sadness, wasn't it? Because who enjoys sitting through the tutorial that often? Siffrin doesn't. I don't, either.

So, since combat is an useless obstacle now meant to inspire frustration, what do you do for a boss? You can't well make it a gameplay challenge now, no. The bosses of Act 5 are an emotional challenge: a painful wait.

First, Siffrin fights the King, alone. This is already nervewracking because of one factor - in every other run, you need Mirabelle's shield skill, or else you're scripted to die. You're actually forced to fight the King multiple times in Act 3, and have to do it at least once in Act 4, though you'll likely do it more. Point is: you know how this fight works.

You know Siffrin's fight is doomed from the outset, but all you can do is keep slinging attacks. Siffrin is enough of a powerhouse to take the King's HP down, what with the healing and buff skills they have now, not to even mention you can just go all in on damage and then loop back.

(And no matter which way you play it, whether you just loop or use strategically, it reflects on Siffrin, too. Has he grown callous enough not even death will stop their mission? Or does he still avoid pain, as much as he can?)

This fight still allows you the artifice of even that much choice, not that it matters. The other shoe drops eventually - Siffrin becomes slower, and slower. Unsettling, considering this game works on an Action Gauge system. You barely get turns anymore. The screen gets darker, and darker. Until Siffrin is frozen in time, just as you knew he had to be, because you know how this encounter works, know it can't be cleared without Mirabelle.

And, then, a void.

Siffrin awakens to nothingness. The only way to tell you've hit a wall is if Siffrin has no walking animation to match your button inputs. You walk, and walk, until you're approached by.... you. The next enemy encounter of the game, and Siffrin's absolute lowest point: Mal Du Pays.

Or, "Homesickness," in english. If you know the game, you know why it's named this, but that's not the point at the moment.

Thing is, where you could damage the King and are damaged in turn, giving you at least a proper combat experience, even if its doomed to fail, Mal Du Pays has no such thing.

You can attack. You can defend. But it is immune to all attacks. And in return, it does nothing. It's common, at least, for undefeatable enemies to be a "survive" challenge, but nope. The entire fight is "press button and wait." Except, remember the previous fight against the King? The entire time, you were waiting for the big instant death attack to drop. That feeling, at least for me, carried forward. I was incredibly on edge just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And, as is a pattern, Siffrin is, too. As Siffrin's attacks fail to connect, they start talking to Mal Du Pays.

But he gets no response, as you get no attacks to strategize around. The wait for anything to happen is utterly agonizing. You and Siffrin are both waiting for something to happen. This isn't a fight. It just pretends to be. It's an utter rugpull, because Siffrin was so undefeatable for most of Act 4 and all of Act 5 so far. It's kind of terrifying!

and it does. It finally does something. Ma Du Pays speaks, in the voice of Siffrin's friends, listing out their deepest fears. I think it's honestly fantastic. You're forced to just sit here and listen to Siffrin's deepest doubts, things you know the characters could not say because it references the timeloops they're all utterly unaware of. This is all Siffrin, talking to himself. And all you, all Siffrin, can do, is keep wailing away on the enemy to no effect whatsoever.

So of course this ends with Siffrin giving up. What else can you do?

And then Siffrin's friends show up and unfreeze them and it's all very cool yay. The pure narrative scenes aren't really the main focus but I want to point out here:

A) Mirabelle is in the first party slot here, referencing how she's the de facto protagonist, and Bonnie fills in the fourth slot left empty, which shows all characters uniting to save Siffrin

B) this is the only instance of the other party members having act specific battle icons: they're all smiling brightly, further pushed by the upbeat music

C) the reflecting shield Mirabelle uses to freeze the King uses a variation of her hangout skill cut in, marking it as her true "final" skill and giving the whole fight a more climatic feeling.

It's also a short gameplay sequence with Siffrin utterly uninvolved in the battle. You can't even see them onscreen. But... it feels warm, doesn't it? Everybody coming together. Siffrin doesn't have to fight anymore.

At last, the King is defeated. Siffrin and co. make for the Head Housemaiden, to have her look at Siffrin's sudden illness. Siffrin is utterly exhausted, famished, running a fever. And this isn't unexpected - after all, their skills in Act 5 had no cooldown. For context, instead of featuring any sort of MP system, all skills work on a cooldown basis, where a character can't use it for a certain number of turns. The lowest cooldown is actually Siffrin's Knife to Meet You, which has a cooldown of 1. In universe, this is reasoned as the characters needing a break from spamming craft in order to not exhaust themselves.

Siffrin's skills in Act 5 having no cooldown/being infinitely spammable isn't a sign of their strength - it's a sign that he refuses to let himself rest in order to rush through as fast as possible.

Moving on, Siffrin panics when seeing the Head Housemaiden, because seeing her means one thing: the end. Prior to this in the game, every single time you beat the King, the loop ends when you talk to the Head Housemaiden.

Reality breaks down, the whole shebang. It's here that Siffrin realizes - they don't want the loops to end, because the end of their journey means their family will leave, and he'll be alone again. The happiest time of his life will be over.

Siffrin goes totally ballistic, to say the least.

As it turns out (and was heavily foreshadowed narratively), Siffrin has been using Wish Craft to subconciously cause the timeloop because of their abandonment issues. It's rather predictable if you paid attention to literally anything, but it's extremely notable how heavily Siffrin is paralleled to the King, the antagonist they swore to kill by themself at the start of Act 5. The King wants to freeze Vaugarde in time because it is, in his mind, "perfect," for accepting him after he lost his home - a backstory he shares with Siffrin.

Siffrin has become the exact antagonist he swore to kill, and it's shown by how the next fight utterly flips everything on its head.

Siffrin is the final boss.

In a towering form made of stars, Siffrin looks down at their friends. His face is terrified, because of his internal conflict; he can't hurt his friends, but he can't let them go, either. The combat prompt is simply changed to "END IT!"

This fight is similar to the previous, in that you just need to wait a certain number of turns until its over. However, this time, it's not dreadful suspense. It's... confusion, and hesitance.

You have two options for combat: Attack your friends, or attack yourself.

And... you don't really want to do either, I think. I certainly don't. But what else can you do? It's Siffrin's desires clashing in full force. Attack your friends, and force them to stay? Or attack yourself, and let them go safely without you?

Worth noting, here - when you attack Siffrin's friends, you can't harm them. Isabeau will shield all attacks. And when you attack yourself, Mirabelle will heal you back to full. And the friends don't... do anything, either. How could they? Occasionally, Mirabelle heals you and Isabeau shouts words of motivation, but the main thing is...

(Your friends don't know what to do.)

None of them want to harm Siffrin. Both sides simply stare at each other, resolute in their conviction but unwilling to end it with violence. It's of note that this loop, the last one, is the only loop where the King isn't killed. Just frozen. And now here is Siffrin, clamoring for the same eternity the King was. Of course everything ends in a tearfilled conversation as Siffrin sees their friends won't leave him, even after the journey ends, but I still have to appreciate this moment.

Siffrin is directly put in the position with their friends as his enemies, forced to physically reckon that keeping them in this loop is an act of violence, against both their friends, and against himself.

It's a happy ending. But... what does it mean?

Of course, ISAT is obviously about the fear of change. Siffrin is afraid of the journey ending, and of being alone. However, ISAT is also a game about games. Siffrin is playing the same game, over and over, because it's comforting. It's familiar. It's nice, to know exactly what happens next. These characters might just be predictable lines of dialogue, but... they feel like friends. Have you ever played a game, loved it, put countless hours into it, but you never finished it? Because you just couldn't bear to see it end? For the characters to leave your life, for there to be a void in your heart where the game used to be?

After all, maybe it became part of your routine! You play the game every day, slowly chipping away at it for weeks at a time. For me, I beat ISAT in four days. It utterly consumed me during this time. I had 36 hours of playtime by the end. Yeah, in that week, I did not do much more than play ISAT.

And once i beat it, i beat it, again. I restarted the game to see the few scenes I missed, most specifically the secret boss I won't talk about here. I... couldn't let go of the game yet. I wanted to see every scrap I could. I still do. I'm writing this, in part because I still do. It's scary to let go.

Ever heard the joke term of "Postgame Depression?" It's when you just beat a game, and you're suddenly sad. Maybe because the ending affected you emotionally and you need to process the feelings it invoked, or you search for something that can now fill your time with it gone.

The game ends, for real this time, the last time you talk to the Head Housemaiden. But Siffrin gets... scared. What if everything loops back again? And so, his family offers to hold his hand. They face the end, together.

For all loops, including the ending, you never see what happens after. After they leave the loop for good. Because the loop is the game itself. It's asking you to trust that life goes on for these characters, and it holds your hand as it asks you to let go. There's a reason for Siffrin's theater metaphors. He is the actor, and the director, asking everyone to do it over one more time. He's a character within the game, and its player.

There's a reason I talked about endgame content. This, the way it all repeats, there's nothing new, difficulty and stakes bleed away as you snap the game over your knee - it's my copy of White 2 with two hundred hours in it. It's me playing Fire Emblem Awakening in under 3 hours while skipping every cutscene. Are you playing for the sake of play, for the sake of indulging in your memories, because you're afraid of the hole it'll leave when you stop?

Of note: the narrative never condemns Siffrin for unwittingly causing their own suffering. He's a victim of circumstance. It's seen as endearing, even, that Siffrin loves their friends to the point of rather seeing the world destroyed than them gone. But Siffrin is also told: we'll stay with you for now, but we'll part ways eventually. And one day, you'll have to be okay with it.

Stop draining the things you love of every ounce of enjoyment just because you're afraid of what happens next. I'm not saying to never play your favorite games again. Playing ISAT a second time, I still had a lot of fun! I saw so many new things I didn't before, and I enjoyed myself immensely, reading the same dialogue over and over. But... it makes me look at other games I love and still play, and makes me ask... is this still fun? Do I still need to play this game to enjoy it? Even writing this is an afterimage of my enjoyment, but it's a new way to interact with the game, to analyze it through this lens. Fuck, man, I write fanfiction. Look at me.

All of this, fanart, fanfic, analysis, is a way to prolong that enjoyment without making yourself suffer for it. Without just going through the motions of enjoyment without actually experiencing any. But one day, the thing you love won't be fun to talk and write and draw about. And it's okay. You'll have new things to love. I promise.

In the end.... I'm certain I'll replay ISAT one day. Between great writing, art, puzzles and unresolved mysteries, it's my shoe-in for game of the year.

But I won't replay it for quite some time. I've had enough, for now, so I let my love take other forms.

Siffrin is never condemned, because love is no evil. Be it love for another person, or for a game. And please, if you're overempathetic - it's still a game, at the end of the day. The great thing about games is that you can always boot them up again, no matter how long its been.

A circle within a circle indeed.

To summarize:

The repetitiveness of ISAT's combat, lack of new enemies, and Siffrin's ever increasing strength eventually allows you to snap the combat over your knee, rendering it irrelevant and boring. Though this may seem counterproductive at first, it perfectly mirrors how Siffrin has also grown bored with these repeated encounters and views them only as an obstacle to get past. The reflection of Siffrin's own tiredness with the player's annoyance increases the compassion the player has for Siffrin as a character.

Additionally, the endgame state of the combat system serves as commentary on the state of a favorite game played too often, much like how Siffrin has unwittingly trapped themself in the loop. Despite the game having no more challenge or content left to over, a player might return to their favorite game anyway, solely to try and recreate the early experience of actually having fun with it. This ties into ISAT's metanarrative about the fear of change and refusal to let go of comfort even when the object (here, your favorite video game) offering that comfort has become utterly bereft of any substance to actually engage with. Playing for the sake of playing, with no actual investment to keep going besides your own memories.

Later on, stripping away even the pretense of strategy for a "press button and wait" format of final bosses highlights the lack of options at Siffrin's disposal and truly forces the player into their shoes. Truly, the only way to win is to stop playing.

#feli speaks #in stars and time #isat #isat spoilers #lays down on floor. it's done. it's done #i actually narrowed down in scope to just focus on the combat by the way. and this is like. several thousand words

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ellephlox · 9 months

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Anchor

Summary: Matt helps you when you're overstimulated at a party.

Pairing: Matt x fem!reader on the autism spectrum

Warnings: Description of panic attack, overstimulation, brief and very indirect reference to sexual assault, profanity.

A/N: I apologize in advance if this doesn't fit with your experience of autism! I just used my own tendencies as inspiration to write this. Thank you so much for the request, anon!

Foggy warned you that his family could be... intense. Not just rambunctious, or extraverted, but more like a crowd of drunken mega-fans when their favorite team won the Super Bowl.

"So I get it if you don't want to come," he said, speaking through a mouthful of poutine. "No pressure at all. It's just a summer barbecue. But the only food there will be lasagna, just so you know."

"Why lasagna?" You sat across from him and Karen at a small, quiet diner after work, with Matt to your left. Sometimes you went to Josie's, purely because it was Matt and Foggy's favorite bar, but on busy days you'd go to this smaller eatery instead. Matt never made a big deal of it, and never said specifically to Karen and Foggy why he always suggested the quieter restaurant on the days when Josie's was brimming with patrons and music, but you knew why, and you'd told him a thousand times how grateful you were.

"Why lasagna?" Foggy repeated. "Uh, because July 29th is none other than the very important holiday, National Lasagna Day?"

"I have a feeling your definition of 'very important' differs ever so slightly from mine," you said. "Sorry. Haven't heard of it. So, you celebrate this because...?"

"Because my dad thought it would be funny and then it kinda stuck. So now it's an official Nelson Family Tradition."

"He's dragged me to some really weird traditions over the years," Matt said, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. You liked the feeling of being in a cubby of his arms, and you subconsciously leaned in closer to him. There weren't many people you could lean into comfortably, but Matt was one of them. "Careful. Once you go to one, he invites you to all of them. I'm still recovering from the Hammock Olympics."

"What's—"

"Don't ask," Foggy cut in. "It's a long story. But think about it, okay? We'd love to have you."

You weren't keen on going to a lasagna party — or any party, for that matter — but you agreed. Foggy had been your friend for a long time, and you felt that you owned it to him; besides, as much as he claimed his family was rowdy, they couldn't be that unruly.

But nothing could have prepared you for the swarm of Nelsons that spilled out of the house and onto the lawn. They were everywhere: Dancing to music that pumped from a speaker with far too much bass that made you wince. Shooting hoops in the short driveway and bodily ramming into one another, sweat visible under their arms. Hovering over the drinks, pouring from the array of alcohol that was stacked on a folding table.

"How many family members does Foggy even have?" you asked, under your breath, as you slowed slightly. Matt was leisurely tapping his cane next to you, his hand loosely around your arm.

"Based on memory? A few dozen. But..." Matt's brow crinkled. "There's definitely more than five dozen heartbeats here right now."

"More than sixty? How are there so many Nelsons? How are they all even able to attend? Don't some of them have other obligations to go to?"

"If it gets really packed in there, and you want to leave, we can go anytime."

"It's okay. I'll be fine."

"Really, sweetheart." Matt tugged at your arm slightly. "Just showing up is a huge deal for Foggy. We can leave at anytime, and no one will judge us."

You smiled at him. "You're the coolest guy ever, you know that?"

Walking up the Nelsons' driveway, you hoped that you and Matt would just melt into the crowd, but instead Foggy caught a glimpse of you and waved wildly. Wonderful. You put a wide smile on your face, though, and waved back stiffly. Awkwardly. Maybe no more waving for me.

To distract yourself from the heat already rising in your face, you began to narrate to Matt. "Foggy's up ahead of us. Drinks are all on the left. Lemonade, I think, apple cider, vodka, wine. And... what looks like a cheese board? There's also a lot of chalk all over the driveway. Hop scotch, body outlines, and genitalia, I think."

"Hopefully the last isn't courtesy of Foggy."

"I don't think so. Foggy is—"

"Behind you, and delighted that you came," Foggy said, coming up from behind and hugging you. You stiffened, unprepared for the embrace, but he bounced back quickly, his face flushed with the heat of the day. "Happy National Lasagna Day! I'd recommend getting in there before the Twisted Teas are gone."

In the corner of your eye, you could see someone reaching over to turn up the volume on the music. The bass thumped out of the speakers with even more force, and simultaneously a baby started wailing only ten feet away from you. You tensed slightly, resisting the urge to simply turn around and walk away from this party. For Foggy. For Foggy, I'll stay here and enjoy myself as much as I can.

Matt must have sensed it, because his hand crept to yours and squeezed. "Drinks nearby?"

"Yeah, about five feet to your left," Foggy said. "I'll read you the options. Hey, Y/N — my mom wants to meet you." At your bewildered look, Foggy raised his hands. "I don't know why. I'm just the messenger. She's inside, in the kitchen right now, and all she said was she wants to talk to you once you get here."

"She wants to talk to me?" The prospect was alarming. So was the idea of leaving Matt's side in a swarm of people like this. But you had no choice, because Mrs. Nelson suddenly waved from the front door, as though she'd sensed your arrival, beckoning you inside.

"She's waving me in," you said, panicking slightly. "Foggy, are you sure she meant me?"

"Positive. Sorry. She's going to pry, but don't feel obligated to tell her your darkest secrets. I think she likes the idea of having a girl to chat with about Matt and me."

Dear God. Please let this not last long. You reluctantly parted from Matt, and made your way into the brightly lit, maximist-style interior of the Nelson home. Knick-knacks and assorted tchotchkes surrounded you as though you were in an antique shop.

"Y/N!" Mrs. Nelson appeared again, her face round like Foggy's. You started to extend a hand, but she went right in for a hug — so that's where Foggy gets it from — and squeezed you. Limply you stood there, awkwardly reaching to hug back with one arm.

"It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Nelson," you said. "Can I help with anything in the kitchen?"

"Don't be silly, that's not why I asked you in here. I want you to give me intel."

"Intel?"

"On Matthew! You're dating him, aren't you?"

"Oh — I—"

"We've known Matthew since he was a first year in law school," she went on, picking up a knife and chopping at a carrot with dextrous agility. "That boy doesn't ever settle down. But now he's met you, and I want details!"

"Um..." You averted your gaze. She hardly blinked at all, and it was unnerving. Instead you focused on the dripping faucet, and then the picture frames to your left. Foggy in college, Foggy with his siblings, a family portrait outside of Acadia National Park. You finally compromised and settled your gaze to the corner of her left eye. Close enough. "Well, we met about a year ago. Matt's always just understood me, and I guess we got along well with conversation, so here we are."

"You thinking of getting married?"

I barely know this woman, and she wants to know about my relationship. Your stomach was clenching at what you'd say, and it didn't help knowing that Matt was certainly listening to every word of the conversation. "I don't — I mean, I'm not really... I can't say. Not because I don't know, but because that's between me and Matt, mostly." Shit. Was that too harsh? You assumed it wasn't, because Mrs. Nelson went right on smiling.

The door slammed as someone else came in. You whirled around, hoping desperately it was Matt, but it was some unnamed relative who had the distinct Nelson features and a cigarette in his hand. He lit it, breathing in deeply, and exhaling smoke into the air.

"You know I don't like you smoking inside, Ben," Mrs. Nelson said, shooing at him.

"Sorry." Ben didn't stop smoking. You winced as the smell of cigarette smoke wafted up to you, and glanced at the closed window. That air Ben was exhaling — it was now in your lungs, and you could feel it tickling your throat. The more you thought about the fact that you were inhaling his air, the more restless you felt. The smoke curled through the air, and breezed against you as he sucked on the cigarette again. Surely it was now going to cling to your clothes for the rest of the day. You'd be able to smell it, you knew. And Matt would be able to smell it too, which would make it a hundred times worse because now you felt bad—

"Y/N?"

Your head snapped back to Mrs. Nelson. "Sorry?"

"I wondered if you'd like to hold the baby. She's fourteen weeks old today. I can ask Susan to bring her in for you."

That's the very last thing I want to do, actually.

You struggled for an answer, and finally landed on an excuse. "That's very kind of you to offer. But I think I've got to go back out," you said, jabbing a thumb over your shoulder and plastering a gracious look on your face. "I want to find Matt and... introduce him to someone."

Please don't ask who.

Fortunately, Mrs. Nelson didn't question you at all. "Oh, of course! I won't keep you."

Yes, please don't.

You hurried out of the kitchen, not realizing you were holding in a breath until you were in the mercifully clean, smoke-free air outside. The downside was that in the time you had been indoors, the sun had emerged from behind the clouds, and metamorphosed the already humid day into a blistering sauna.

You found Matt standing in the direct sunlight with some of Foggy's brothers. There was no shade to be found, and you mourned your decision to not put on sunscreen today as you joined his side and resisted the urge to hoist the back of your cardigan over your head like a parasol. The sweltering sunshine was so intense that you felt as though you could feel your skin burning second by second.

They all laughed — at what, you weren't sure — but it rang in your ears, nearly making you screw up your face. How was Matt handling this? Surely it was bothering him more than it bothered you. Yet he had a placid expression on his face, holding his cane loosely with one hand and sipping on a beer with the other.

"Last call for the cheese board," Foggy said suddenly. "And Mom says it'll be another two hours until supper, so grab some Swiss and Muenster now or forever hold your hunger."

Your stomach felt as though it were curdling. Two hours? It was already an hour past when you usually had lunch. Two more hours was frankly terrifying. And the only thing standing between you and the two-hours-out-lasagna was... cheese.

"Want to make our way over there, then?" you asked Matt, as casually as you could. There was no sense in letting him know you were stressed. He was having a good time, that much you could tell, and the last thing you wanted was for your discomfort to bring down his day.

Matt went with you to the table, and only when you were out of earshot of Foggy and his brothers did he speak. "Hey. You doing okay?"

"I've been better. I've been worse." There was no sense in trying to lie to him. "Let's just grab some cheese. I didn't realize lunch would be so late, or I would've had something at home."

But just before you reached the table, a girl of about eight or nine years ran in front of you, and dug both hands — both hands, two hands with chalk and dirty visibly staining them — into the platter of cheese, scooping out a handful for herself.

"Ella!" her mother snapped, a few feet away. "You've had enough. No more cheese."

The girl obeyed, tossing all the cheese slices back into the platter and running away cheerfully. You stood stock still, frozen in your spot.

Matt cocked his head slightly. "Still hungry for cheese?"

"Why?" you managed. "Why, why, why? Who just touches all the food then dumps it back in?" The cheese was too tainted now. Wistfully you looked at it, then at your watch. One hour, fifty-six minutes left. And that was if Mrs. Nelson served the lasagnas on time.

"I think that the Nelson household is your new nemesis," Matt said, pulling you in towards him. "Anything I can do?"

"No," you said, fighting to keep yourself optimistic. For Matt, for Foggy. "Thank you, though."

"We can imagine we're in a version of the Hunger Games. Except instead of bloodthirsty teens, we're surrounded by small talk and cigarette smoke."

"You knew?"

"Smelled it right away." Matt took your arm again as you made your way back to the circle of Nelson brothers. "And figured you were having the time of your life in there."

"Ha."

"If it makes you feel any better, all their stomachs have rumbled in the past half an hour," Matt said softly, nodding his head in the direction of Foggy's brothers. "You're not the only one who's disappointed that lunch is two hours out. And..." He shifted so that his right ear was facing Foggy. "It sounds like Foggy really, really needs to pee right now."

You let out a laugh. "Information I didn't need to have."

Matt only smiled as you both rejoined the circle.

You thought you'd make it until lunch. It was only two hours, you kept telling yourself, it wasn't long. Not much longer in the sun. Not much longer you'd have to stand there while Ben lit another cigarette nearby and the wind carried the smoke right into your face. Not much longer that the Nelsons would keep getting drunker and drunker and their laughs more raucous. And, certainly, it wouldn't be much longer that the music was blaring, pumping through your ears to rattle your very bones.

And then everyone grouped together, for one large family conversation, and you found yourself being jostled into the middle of a massive, warm crowd of Nelsons, shoulder-to-shoulder with people you'd never met before. The panic you had kept at bay so far began to swell like a tsunami under the surface of tranquil waters, thudding in your heart and moving up to your face. Too warm. The sun beat down, not a cloud in sight. All of the little kids were next to you now, singing and jumping up and down, and—

One of them sneezed, and with horror you felt droplets of mucus land on your right arm.

"I have to go," you gasped to Matt, slipping backwards out of the crowd and making a beeline for the house. Bathroom. You needed a bathroom.

But the final straw was the bathroom itself. Another speaker sat in the windowsill, projecting music loudly to the backyard, and it smelled like someone took a shit in there, making you gag and turn around—

Straight into Matt.

"Matt," you whispered. "I can't. I can't do this."

"Sweetheart—"

"It's too much. I've tried, but I can't, they're sneezing and laughing and dancing and I just can't do it anymore. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"What do you have to be sorry for?"

"Because I'm ruining your day!" You crossed into the hallway and sat on the bottom of the stairs, rubbing your hands over your face and hair, again and again, as though to get the sound off. Only then did you realize with horror that you hadn't yet washed your arm, so you leapt up to run to the sink. Matt followed you, nimbly stepping over the clutter that was strewn on the floor. "If you didn't have me at your side, being a leech, you'd still be out there, laughing with them and sipping a beer. And — and you've got the hearing of a fucking bat, but you're able to tolerate everything, while I just throw a tantrum like a two year old." You were near tears, the truth of your own statement ringing into the kitchen. Because it was ridiculous, wasn't it? Matt's hearing was incomprehensibly better than yours, and so was his sensitivity to the sun and the cigarette smoke, and yet it didn't seem to touch him at all.

He reached out, and you thought he was going to shut off the faucet, but instead he ran his hand under the water, took the soap, and began to rub at your arm slowly, up and down. You stood still, your own hands dripping, and allowed him to remove whatever snot might still be on your skin. Finally he lowered his fingers, and took a clean washcloth from the cupboard under the sink. Starting with the top of your arm he dried off every last bit of water, working his way downward.

"Last night, out in the suit, I came across a frat party," he said, finally drying off your hands and setting the cloth on the edge of the sink. "Over seventy people were there. And there were roofies being handed out, like hors d'oeuvres, so that the guys could take advantage of whoever they wanted. I went in, shut it down. Went into the bedrooms and stopped a couple of them in the act. But the whole time, they had this heavy metal music blasting, and the house was filled with the smell of weed. It was dusty in there, too. Every breath I drew in, I could taste it, and feel the grit of it."

You remained silent and let him do the talking. His voice was low, pleasant; a welcome distraction from the voices and radio outside.

"It set me off," he continued. "And even afterwards, I could still hear it ringing in my ears, and could still feel the layer of dust on my skin. You know what helped me to snap out of it?" He raised his hand and gently cupped your face. "You."

You vaguely remembered Matt crawling into bed with you the previous night, and pulling you in close, but as far as you remembered, you hadn't even said a word. "Me? But how—?"

"You're my anchor." Matt's hand dropped. "You. When everything is too loud, I listen to your steady inhales and exhales. Your heartbeat. When the scents are too much, all I have to do is breathe in your shampoo and detergent. Your skin, your hair, your body... it's the only thing that I want to always be with. You're always my anchor. And I know you're strong enough to do all this on your own, but if you ever need me to be, I'll be your anchor, too. Just say the word, and we can leave this party. We can stay in all weekend and do nothing but order in takeout and watch movies. We can drive twenty hours north and stay in a remote cottage for a week. And if you need a break from me, I'll take off until you're ready. I'll always be your anchor, always, if you want me to be."

You closed your eyes, your heartbeat slowing; it was as though someone had dialed down the music outside. Matt seemed to notice the relaxing of your posture, because he tilted his head against yours, and breathed, "That's my girl."

"Thank you," you whispered, wrapping your arms tentatively around him. "And I never want a break from you. Never you." At your motion, his own arms embraced you tightly, as though he'd been waiting for the indication that you wanted to hug.

"And something else," Matt said, after you pulled apart. Without looking he reached behind him towards the fruit basket and plucked out two bananas. "I'll pay Mrs. Nelson back for these."

You broke out in a smile and took one of the bananas. "Keep guard so no one walks in on us chowing down alone in here like two bizarre monkeys?"

He leaned against the counter next to you as you peeled the banana. "Always."

#daredevil #matt murdock #marvel #matt murdock x reader #daredevil x reader #reader insert #mcu #reader #x reader #matt murdock x fem!reader #matt murdock x autistic!reader #fluff #autistic!reader #autism #neurodivergent #neurodivergent!reader #overstimulation

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anime-rambles · 2 years

Text

Some Alpha you are, Pathetic

Pairing: Alpha!KiriBaku x Omega!Reader

Type: Angst, hurt, NSFW if you squint.

Word Count: 3100+

A/N: Wow people seem to be very excited for this fic, so I decided to bringing it out eariler than what I was planning. Thank you all so much for your support <3 I have a new taglist form follow the link below and it will bring you too it. Much love as always, Tiff <3

Summary: You and Bakugou knew one thing for certain, Kirishima was already in your clan. But with your heat approaching you belived it was time to say it outloud, little did you know Bakugou is a very jealous, insecure alpha and feels threatened...

Permanent Tag List: @jasmine2042003 @jazzylove @amypop122 @misssugarless @plutounderbridges @butterscotch-babie @backoftheletter @gojosslvt @himi-yuu @ebiharachan @black-rose-29

MHA Tag List: @hornehlittleweeblet2 @mystiqueewrites @belzeblitz @moonygeno413 @ace-the-side-character @unlogical-ella @moonseye @vaellee @corruptowlette @pasteldaze @24-7-multifandomsimp @yetoadet @ninetyeightrins @kirissluttypebble @elaineplayz @phantomalchemist @tigerd-draws @kunaigirlx44 @jujutaku @adventures-in-a-heartbeat @cmars59 @upinacloud @yourdragonsfire @uwiuwi @burningbluegalaxy @kirislilwhorewife @kuzusouda-and-terumaru-blog @kat-perdue @ebiharachan @lazyafgurl @bratty-fics @eraserheads-sleeping-bag

Extra tags: @lunamoonbby @sleepless-addict

TAGLIST

MASTERLIST

“Katsuki, please you're not listening to me” tears stream down your face as you try to get your alpha to understand, yes bringing this up was the best thing to do but also probably not the greatest of timing with your heat coming so soon.

“No, why should I listen to you, you want another alpha? I am listening y/n? Did I hear wrong?” he questioned you, staring deep into you

“Well i–”

“Well what ‘mega? Fucking speak!” He shouted at you, pumping anger pheromones into your room. You froze, trying not to flinch at his pheromones because you knew it would hurt him deeply if you were scared of him.

“You know what, no I'm not listening to this, I'm not good enough for you? Fine, i’ve a mission starting soon but I think I'll start it today. your next heat coming up? Spend it alone” with that Katsuki walked out the door, slamming it behind him. You cried and cried, you knew going after him would be a mistake so you didn't. You just stood in your grief. This was not how it was supposed to go. You simply asked Bakugou if he would be open to adding another alpha to your pack, bringing in Kirishima. The only thing yous dont do together is sex? So what would be the harm, you loved Kirishima and you know Bakugou loved him too if he would just admit it. Kirishima spent many a night in your nest with the two of you, scenting each other after hard missions. Your omega called out to him, and you knew Kirishima felt the same about you both.

Bakugou was right, your heat coming soon, and you were going to be alone for it. For the first time since you and Bakugou got together in UA, you were going to spend it alone and that terrified you. Your omega whined, and your chest felt tight. The tears still fell from your eyes and your lungs were screaming at you to take some deep breaths. You walked to your room slowly with your head down and crawled into your nest to hide from the world and let the beginnings of your heat take you. You prayed that this heat wouldn’t put you into a drop, but deep down you knew it would.

Kirishima knew something was wrong, he could feel it in his bones. The moment your morning text had not come in. There was only one thing to do today and that was to make his way to yours. Once he reached your apartment door, he knocked, and knocked and knocked. Knowing that if Bakugou was inside he would get an explosion to his face but he knew that Bakugou wasn’t here. He could smell his pheromones outside the door and there were two notable things about this, for one they were old and the second he was angry when he left. Kirishima pounded on the door again and there was no answer.

“y/n? Are you there?” he asked, and still no response. He placed his nose to the crack in the door frame and breathed in deeply, hoping to smell you. As Kirishima breathed in, he quickly pulled away and threw his hands to his nose. Something was wrong, something was really wrong. Kirishima would pay for the door later but right now, he needed to know you were okay.

Kirishima looked at the door to check where the best place would be to break it without completely shattering it. It was actually simply, punch the door handle and the door would still be intact. So he did so, the sour smell in the air hit him harder as he made his way into the apartment to where it smelled the strongest.

He called out and he got closer to the door, but still no answer. By the smell in the air he knew you and Bakugou had an argument. He knocked on the bedroom door and placed his ear to it, he could hear a shuffle from inside which at least told him you were alive.

“Y/n, I’m coming in.”

As Kirishima entered the room, his alpha called to him to protect you, to comfort you but he must hold off. He walked in and pumped smoothing pheromones into the air as a way to coax you out from hiding. Which worked, he could see your eyes poke out from the edge of the bed but you were still hidden beneath the blankets.

“Alpha”, you called out weakly. Kirishima sighed.

“Yes and no sweetheart, i am an alpha just not your alpha” He said and made his way to your side and sat on the ground, his head resting against the mattress near to where your head was poking out.

“No you are alpha, my alpha” you said, pulling your head out the covers and wiping your eyes to look at Kirishima. Kirishima’s heart broke and he pulled his hand up to your face to wipe away the tears. You purred into his hand and pulled his scent gland to your nose breathing him in, after a few minutes you pulled his gland to your neck and rubbed it a few times. Kirishima allowed you this comfort because he knew it would bring you back to him for a little moment. After a few moments of silence he spoke again.

“What happened y/n, where’s Bakugou, he would never of leave you this close to your heat?”

“Well he did, didn’t he, Eijrou.” Tears filled your eyes again and Kirishima quickly pulled you off the bed and into his arms. He places your head into his neck, forcing you to breathe in his pheromones to relax.

“Come on now little one, breathe for me” He patted your hair as you calmed down again. You could really feel your heat starting to take over with being in the presence of your alpha, well one of your alpha’s but you must talk with him first. You took a moment to place yourself into the real world for a second and realized you were licking Kirishima scent glands on his neck and purring to yourself. You pulled away and looked into his face.

“Sorry Eijirou” You giggled slightly to yourself and you looked as Kirishima's massive smile took over his face.

“There she is, there's my girl” you took a breath again, smiling as his comment to you.

“I messed up Eiji, i messed up big time”

“What do you mean you messed up, talk to me about what happened?” You looked up at him and took another breath, Kirishima pumped more pheromones into the air.

“Well Eijirou, you are basically already in a pack with us, we all but have sex, and i know my omega wants you and i know Katsuki alpha calls to yours and I know your alpha calls to us, I can tell that right now by the way you came to me, and how your holding me, comforting me -” You took a breath and started to rub your hands together, Kirishima placed a hand in your and stop you from being nervous. “I mentioned to Katsuki how would he feel if we added another alpha to our pack, and i don’t know what happened, he just started screaming at me and wouldn’t let me talk or even get the chance to say it was you, maybe because i’m close to my heat but he just went off the rail and said that i should spend this heat alone and that he had a mission coming up he was going to start after my heat but because i mentioned what i did, he starting it today, leaving me alone–” you started to cry again,

“--i’ve…..nev…er..done…th..is..alone…eiji..not..si..nce….ua” Kirishima turned you into his neck again, anger boiled in him and he suppressed a growl so as to not scare you. What was Bakugou thinking, they had spoken about it before. Bakguou had mentioned that Kirishima’s alpha made him want to submit to allow Kirishima to take control. So why would he have this reaction? He knew Bakugou wanted this but why he reacted the way he did, Kirishima knew one thing, he needed to find him and soon.

Once you had calmed down, Kirishima coaxed you into drinking some water as he placed back in your nest. Scenting lots of things around you so were happy while he left to find Bakugou. Not knowing how long you had until your heat would come into effect he looked around for your sex toys knowing that Bakugou had them as a in case of emergency setting where he couldn’t be there but Kirishima could help you, not to actually knot you but to use the knotting toys on you and to try and keep you grounded. Kirishima didn't know if you knew about them or not but thought it was best to leave them within your reach.

As Kirishima had broken the front door, he thought it was best to bar it up as best he could, to stop any wandering alpha from just randomly strolling into the apartment and taking advantage. He was also going to make Bakugou pay for leaving his omega in this situation and for forcing Kirishima to leave you in your condition. He was happy enough that you weren’t going to depression drop and made his way to your balcony and climbed down the fire escape.

It did not take that long to find Bakugou, he simply opened twitter and searched ‘Dynamite’ and looked to see where fans had spotted him. Apparently he was nearby and was not in a great mood today. Kirishima moved quickly to Bakugou’s last location and could hear small explosions of the type that Bakugou used to tell people to back off. As Kirishima made his way around the corner he could see people leaving Bakugou on his own. Kirishima passed them nodding at them and asked them to leave the area.

“Oi Bakugou” Kirishima shouted out. Bakgoug stopped and turned towards him with a smirk on his face.

“Hey Man, you here to help kick some butt, towns been pretty active today” Bakugou stopped.

As Kirishima quickly made his way to Bakugou he grabbed him by the neck and moved him off the street into an alleyway. Bakugou protested the entire time but not once did he use his explosions, Bakugou’s alpha already submitting to Kirishima’s scent and alpha. Kirishima pushed Bakugou up against the wall, and still held his throat. Bakugou struggled around Kirshima’s hold, slipping a few times and Kirishima was much taller than him.

“You care to explain to me, what the hell you did” Kirishima growled.

“I don’t know what you are talking about, it was just some small explosion at the reporters nothing that would hurt them.” Kirishima growled again, holding Bakugou tighter.

“NOT THAT” he yelled, pumping out more pheromones, trying to force submission out of Bakugou.

“Why are you so angry shitty hair” Bakugou strained

“I’m angry because you left OUR omega alone and close to her heat and close to a drop, some alpha you are, pathetic” Kirishima spat at Bakugou.

“She’s MINE, not YOURS and she was fine when I left” Bakugou tried to get out of Kirishima's grasp but it was no use, he lost the will to fight him as his alpha had already bowed.

“She’s not mine and she’s not yours, she ours, I was just giving you the time to catch up and realize that we all belong together but after the state you left her in today, I have to intervene because someone forgot what it means to be someone's alpha.” Kirishima growled again, and pushed her body up against Bakugou's.

“She doesn't want you man, she told me she wants a new alpha, hell she doesn't even want me anymore.” Bakugou looked away from Kirishima.

“You stupid alpha, you know it’s me she wants, you know its me you want also, so why? After we spoke about it so much about becoming a pack, would you think she’d not want you or not want me, huh?” Kirishima nudged Bakugou to look him in the eyes. He could feel Bakugou's remorse pour from him as he looked at Kirishima with tears in his eyes.

“I DON'T KNOW OKAY, my alpha panic and next thing i know i'm screaming at her and can't stop, some people are made to be alphas and in control, always knows what to do and can handle situations and omegas and alphas….-” Bakugou takes a breath, “- mine is not one of them, mine saw a future without the two of you and panicked he decided that i should get it over with now and push you both away.” Bakugou whispered the last part as tears started to flow from his eyes.

Kirishima released the grip on his neck slightly, and released pheromones into the air to sooth Bakugou, he could tell it was working as Bakguou no longer sobbed. Kirishima lent forward and licked bakugou's scent gland, causing the blonde to whine and hold onto Kirishima. Kirishima smiled to himself and began to suck on the same spot. As Bakugou struggled to stay standing, Kirishima held his throat again and pulled away to look into his eyes.

“You are mine, do you understand? I am your alpha and you will listen to me, do you understand” Kirishima used his alpha voice on the blonde in the hopes he would submit easily and he did. Bakugou bared his neck to Kirishima and purred to his Alpha to show submission. Kirishima lent forward again and sucked on his gland, letting his teeth graze it so carefully. Bakugou moaned again and tried to grind onto Kirishima's leg. Kirishima smirked to himself, happy at the level of submission Bakugou was giving.

“Listen carefully, you ever and I mean EVER leave our omega like that again, I will kill you, do you understand.” Kirishima used his alpha voice again and forced Bakugou to look at him.

“Yes alpha.”

“Good boy, you're being so obedient.” Kirishima smiled and let him go, letting Bakugou regain his strength. They stood in silence for a moment, and Bakugou began to release panic pheromones into the air.

“Kirishima we have to get back, y/n she… omg what have i done” Bakugou began to walk away but Kirishima pulled him back.

“Bro breathe, she’s okay the moment I was with her, before I came to find you, we’ll head back together okay.” Kirishima held his hand and began to make his way back to the apartment.

+++

Once they made it back, Bakugou made his way to the door but Kirishima stopped him. “What the hell man let’s go” Bakugou stopped and looked at the red head.

“We can use the door” Kirishima looked everywhere bar Bakugou's eyes.

“Shitty hair, why can't we use the door”

Kirishima fiddled with his hand before meeting Bakugou’s gaze. “I kinda broke your door and barricaded it so no one could get to y/n, so we have to use the fire escape” Kirishima ran his fingers through his hair. “You know what fine, i don't care right now”

Bakugou made his way to the fire escape and Kirishima followed. Once they reached his floor both alpha entered, Bakugou hesitated near the door or a moment, “It’s okay bro, take your time her omega needs to heal after what you said, so i’ll be here but i suggest we move to my place for her heat because 1, you don’t have a front door, 2, your rut will happen tomorrow if i'm not mistaken, which means mine is not far behind, so no hanky panky right now just comfort.” Kirishima said to Bakugou, who nodded in response and opened the door.

You moved around under your nest, poking your head out again to look at the intruder. Once your eyes met with Bakugou’s you began to cry and he was beside you in an instant.

“No, no, no, please omega dont cry, this is all my fault” Bakugou whispered and made his way into your nest, slowly uncovering your body.

“Stupid omega, stupid omega, bad omega,” was all you could say over and over again as you trashed around the place.

“No please, baby, please don't say that, you’re the greatest omega, the best ever. I’m the one in the wrong here, me not you, I’m the stupid alpha” he said and you stoped fighting him, your tears at stop and you just stared at him. Bakugou reached forward and pressed his hand to your forehead.

“Gosh baby, you’re so warm, heat’s on its way huh?” he asked, he tucked your hair away from your face.

“Alpha would not listen, said I had to do it alone” You started to tear up again, fear taking over. “Can’t do it alone, can’t be without mate, its’ too much” you said and started to cry again.

“Hey, hey, hey, look at me” Bakugou used his fingers and made you look at him. “I would never make you go through this alone, i was always going to come back, i was a bad alpha okay, but i understand now and look who's here” Bakugou gestured towards the door that Kirishima was leaning up against. You turned your head and looked at Kirishima and smiled at him, then you looked at Bakugou who smiled at you.

“You mean it, we’re all going to be together.” You ask Bakugou.

“Yes, of course, it's how it's meant to be.” Bakugou lent forward and kissed your forehead. You squealed and pumped out as many happy pheromones as you could, both alpha’s smiled at each other and began to move around the room, collecting things.

“Hate to do this little one, but we need to move to mine, so collect things you’ll need to nest, don't worry about clothes I don’t think you’ll be wearing them.” Kirishima said and wink at the both of you. You quickly scrambled out of your nest, quickly kissing Bakugou and making your way towards Kirishima and kissing him. Bakugou growled quietly in the background unheared of by you but not Kirishima. You moved and collected things you definitely knew you would need ignoring both Alphas. Kirishima made his way to Bakugou who looked panicked. “I’m sorry, I'm sorry I don't know why I did that,” Bakugou said standing up.

“It’s okay, your alpha needs time to adjust to sharing, i’ll give him a few hours but after that it will involve punishment.” Kirishima pulled Bakugou up to him, giving him a kiss. Once he pulled away Bakugou was once again purring, Kirishima smirked to himself and looked up at you who was waiting patiently with a big bag in your hand full of things to nest with.

“You sure that all omega, don’t want anything more from this nest.” Kirishima asked. You looked at it and smiled, “Nope, it's time for a new chapter in our lives and a new nest alphas.”

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thedawningofthehour · 5 months

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Making Fun of Rich People Round 2

This one's a little bit different. This house is in Arizona, listed for a clean 20 mil, eight bedrooms ten baths, 16,000 square feet. The outside is really nothing special, looks like every other southwestern wanna-be movie star mansion so let's

Kicking things off with a bang.

You know. I can't even say anything bad about this. Like, the other house, they were people who clearly had more money than taste and built their house as a shrine to their bank accounts. It was not meant to live in, but to prove their wealth. It was ridiculous and stupid and they deserved to be made fun of.

These people. These people know their house is ugly. They know that table was an obscene waste of money. They know that couch screams "my coke dealer was redecorating." They do not care. They love bringing people in and watching their expressions of horror. They rub their hands together gleefully as people try to think of a compliment that isn't too obviously pulled out of their ass.

I mean, come on. That green chandelier, they're absolutely trolling us.

And I'm going to be honest, this looks like a living room I'd actually feel comfortable hanging out in. I can see someone on that couch eating ice cream out of the carton at 3 AM. People sit on that rug and play board games on that table. These people furnished their house to live in, not to display.

I am still going to tease them about it, however.

I'm laughing with them, not at them.

Is it just the angle or does that bed seem super short?

I...don't even know what I'm looking at here. I think this is the closet?

No, okay, they have a whole mall outlet store in here. This is like that one scene in Princess Diaries 2 except Julie Andrews would politely show herself out.

Why the marble. Why do you need a sitting area in your closet.

I will admit, I'm disappointed that the owner of such an interesting house has this many black pumps. I get that they go with everything, but-that's the point. They're universal. You don't need over a dozen of them. I expected better shoes.

Nobody:

Rich People: "make the bathroom...ROUND."

fr, their insanity always seems to come out full-force in the bathroom. I legitimately think rich people might not poop or bathe, because it's always some crazy shit that would be incredibly uncomfortable or downright impossible to use.

Another thing I've noticed, rich people all seem to want bathroom doors that open to the outside. Why?!

Especially when this is the outside they're opening up to!

Seriously, what is the point of this?! You're buck naked and decide to go have a smoke next to some cactuses and your giant patio geode. That's all that's out here. Why. Why.

Actually, it looks like there's little paths, which...just makes this worse, honestly. Imagine you're taking a leisurely stroll through the cactus garden and you pass your parents' bathroom patio, getting a full view of your mom taking a bath through the floor-length windows.

"Yes, in our dining hall with the light fixture that looks like birthday sparklers and our collection of Totally Real cactuses."

I've seen designers rag on those unfinished wood tables before, and while I didn't really agree with them at the time I kind of do now. I think this would look cool as like, a side table or accent table, but on a dining table it's just kind of awkward.

This is the same room, they just kept panning out.

While I made fun of the other house for their grand piano, I have no doubt that someone in this family is a drug-fueled musician. This room looks mega-comfy to lay back and watch a movie in, and I love the sheep.

I'm just...in awe of the audacity.

They didn't even try to match. Didn't even pretend like they cared. And I'm not gonna lie, the red countertop is doing something for me.

"When we want the bugs to join us for dinner."

I can't stress this enough, they have multiple patio sets.

See, the last people didn't show off all their alcohol at their bar because they thought it looked more refined not to. These guys probably have art supplies tucked away in their bar just to keep you on your toes. (they don't need a bar, these are the kind of people who carry flasks around with them)

So like...objectively, this bathroom is hideous. It's way too much, the feather thing is ridiculous, that cabinet is ugly as sin.

But I kind of love it?

Just a reminder: this is in Arizona.

...I have nothing to say here.

WHAT IS UP WITH RICH PEOPLE AND THEIR UGLY BATHROOMS?!

Again with the doorway to the outside! And I see this a lot, but so many rich people bathrooms don't have storage spaces?! Like, look at those sinks. What.

More to my theory that rich people don't have any need for bathrooms.

This is the bedroom I wanted as a thirteen-year-old and just now realized I still do.

THE WALLPAPER IS EVEN BIRBS!

Like, I can't even make fun of this. I am just in awe. This entire house looks if sixth grade me had access to the Sims 3 Create-A-Style and the motherlode cheat, and I honestly love that for them. I hope these people find a new house to be extremely fucking cool in.

Leaving with these calming lemons in the backyard! Pay no attention to all the bathrooms that open up directly to the garden.

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vilsoo · 2 years

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prize counter girl ☆ five

➥ michael afton x camgirl!reader

you've been a camgirl for only a few months and everyone loves the content you post. when michael afton porn surfs to relieve his stress, he comes across your videos. the more he jerks off to your content, the more he's addicted. but it wasn't until, a few months later, he sees your familiar face as the new employee working at the prize counter.

chapter warnings. video chat sex reminiscing

notes. pcg is back yay !!! 🥳 i’d also like to say that the setting of our pizzeria is kind of a mix of dave n busters and the mega pizzaplex from fnaf sb. the arcade is rlly huge and colorful so like why not lol

pcg materlist • previous • chapter six

tags. @sanzu-s @matchakittycat @chiroomii @woahhajime @astrobunny @icekreamcakeee @aftonpartner @erensslutt @halparkebitch @i-am-scared-and-useless-bisexual @roody-y-a @setethstuff @akazxii @queen-simp @mikeesz @yukkomi @milk-bulb @ghostisinvis @corrazon @soft-spirit-ren @jaeeeeeeyito @wh0rephobic @mochas-rambles

Michael wanted to disappear the next morning at work.

Just for a few weeks of maintaining a restorative and healthy sleeping schedule for his new day shift, he had to fuck it all up again. Another sleepless, dreadful night. All because of steamy video chat sex with you. But he decided you weren't at blame for this. It's all his fault for going down this rabbit hole. Getting fucking corrupted by a camgirl that breathes the same air as him now; he did all of this to himself.

Tossing and turning, complicated thoughts racing erratically, shirtless and sweaty, flipping the pillow multiple times, shifting positions, craving for a sip of his water, feeling a constant discomfort, and the never ending flashbacks of you. With his struggle to fall asleep, it was all futile.

Michael couldn't keep his eyes open the whole morning. He knew it would be dangerous for him to drive at a drowsy state like this. So to make his morning much more worse, he called William to drive him to work.

Hearing his father babbling and getting mad for sleeping late drove Michael to pass out right on the passenger seat, his head slanted against the window and a bit of drool hanging off his bottom lip like a little kid. It wasn't until he was startled by him "accidentally" driving over curbs and not giving a shit about it.

When he arrived at the pizzeria and into the arcade, he noticed the lights were already on at the prize corner and the display shelves were mostly organized. The glass showcase counter was also cleaned. His gaze drifts to the opened prize stockroom, sauntering over to see you squatting down at the lower shelf to shove a box of candies in place.

Noticing his figure at the corner of your eyes, you turn at him and smiled. You were like a ray of sunshine pouring over him, a brief feeling of bliss washing out his exhaustion. Of course it had to be you making his rough morning feel slightly better.

"Hey. I came here a little earlier but you weren't here, so... I reorganized the candy island and cleaned mostly everything here. You okay?"

He cleared his throat, almost caught staring at you once again. "Yeah. Why— why wouldn't I be?"

"Um, you look dead." You stood up before him with your gaze wandering over his face, causing his heart to involuntarily pump faster.

Michael sighed. "Yeah, I didn't really get enough sleep last night. Didn't even have enough time or energy to fix myself so that's why I look like shit today."

"Aw. I'm sorry about that," you pout. "But you don't look that bad. I mean, I looked way worse after my first hangover, so..."

He chuckled lightly, catching a glimpse of his smile that looked adorable to you. "I just... I wish I was here earlier to help you."

"It's okay. I can take care of it from here," you assured, mirroring his smile coyly. "I think you should be checking the games. You're a maintenance guy, remember?"

"You bossing me around now?" he teased sarcastically as he pressed his shoulder against the doorway while folding his arms. "Can't believe the new girl on day one is telling me how to do my job."

"Well. I was gonna say something else about how messy your hair was," you teased back.

�� Michael scoffed as he raked through his hair with his fingers. "Okay, yeah. I think we should get back to work now."

He makes way for you out the door, his gaze furtively following your figure moving past it made him hold his breath. The more your voice reverberated in his head, the more his heartbeat accelerated. It was something about the way your tone shifted coquettishly as if you were sweet talking him over the phone. The way your body inched ever so slightly closer as you playfully teased him.

Michael watches everything about you as if he was going to get quizzed on it. But there was something else lingering in his head that he couldn't wrap his finger on:

Were we flirting?

As the question remained unsolved, Michael started his day by performing the daily minor repairs on the game machines. He removed obstructions, repositioned mechanisms, and observed the machine operations to determine any malfunctions. So far, all game machines were fully functional and allowed for the point system to operate. Meanwhile you were counting the cash at the register, keeping track of merchandise inventory, and ensuring that all shelves and displays were maintained.

Thirty minutes before opening time, Michael spent it by playing the Super Shot game. With many thoughts running through his head, nothing could distract him from his winning streak and being skillful at basketball. As you were roaming about the arcade, you finally find him. You quietly watch from behind at how fluid his upper body movements were when he scores, completely stunned at his winning streak and his ability to never miss a shot.

"Wow. You're good at that," you complimented as you stood beside him.

Michael's body seized for a moment when he finally sees you, deeply flattered that you've been watching him play. "Uh— I'm just, you know. Testing the game, that's all. Does the prize corner look good?"

"Yeah. I think we're ready to go," you bantered.

The brunette man sighed down at himself, glancing at the Super Shot panel then furtively back at you. Suddenly, a random idea came across him when he picked up the Fazbear game card.

"Hey, uh... Before we go— 'cuz we only have twenty minutes— do you wanna see the secret technique for this game?"

Your eyebrows raise at him. "There's a secret technique? Like some kind of hack?"

"Mhm. It's the fastest way to get a lot of tickets," he asserted with a smirk, lowering his head and his voice to a whisper. "Don't tell anyone, though. I just know some cool hacks for a few games here since a lot of this shit is rigged. I can show you if you want."

You chortled at him. "Of course I wanna know! Show me, please."

"Alright, alright." Michael chuckled as he swiped the card. He spoke as he demonstrated the steps to you. "Basically with the Super Shot game, after you swipe your card, press 'continuous' mode. When you play, don't try to get as many points as you can. Just get up to 42 points and then don't score anymore. When it's done, it should be looking like this and now you have infinite tickets..."

Every shy glance of his just lands back on your eyes as if he'll never land at anything more enticing. He could speak all day, elaborate about some arcade hacks like a nerd and let his mouth run while his brain goes crazy over you.

I can't believe I was so tongue tied yesterday with her. Now look at me— all confident and talkative this morning. But yet, I'm still nervous...

"Man. If only I knew about this like way back then at this other arcade," you bantered. "Would've been very helpful winning this one prize I've always wanted."

"What was it?" Michael asks.

"It was a jumbo Hello Kitty bear plush. I think it was around thirteen thousand tickets? Can't remember, but I was very dedicated on winning it."

Hello Kitty bear plush... I'll keep that in mind.

Michael suddenly glanced down the row of arcade machines and noticed William. He was passing by to supervise the place and keep everything organized before opening. The man halted when he caught glimpse of the two of you together.

"Michael. Y/N. It's almost 10 AM," he called out. "Be where you need to be before a customer walks in."

"Yes, father. We'll be on our way." Michael shoved the game card in his back pocket and adjusted his uniform, sighing in dismay that he didn't get to spend more time talking with you.

"So... you're not gonna be with me at the prize counter the whole time, right?" you asked as you walked beside him down the arcade machines.

"Sadly not. My father put me in charge of a lot of things downstairs and upstairs. But don't worry— I think you can handle it without me," he reassured with a small smile.

For some reason his reassurance and comfort enlightened you. Ever since your first time meeting Michael and spending more time together, you became very fond of him. You credit his ability to connect, communicate, and be understanding of each other's strengths and limitations. Hell, he's a very attractive employer as well. Maybe once or twice you've stared into his features when he's looking away. He almost looked oddly familiar to you, as if you met him somewhere else before, but couldn't quite put your finger on it...

"Aw. I mean, yeah I'll be fine," you beamed. "Thanks for everything."

Michael mirrored your smile, having another thought surface in his head. "Of course. And uh... if you want, during our break... do you want to play some games together?"

As if your smile just couldn't get anymore wider across your face it made your cheeks ache. "That would be nice! You're so sweet, Michael. Like, literally the sweetest manager ever."

He chuckled it off, staring down at the ground while trying to conceal his reddened face. This amount of boldness and confidence was never brought out of him before it was unbelievable. Trying to make a move on you, hinting his interest, and still putting more effort on trying to get to know you. It was a whole lot of progress compared to his resurfacing agitation and guilt yesterday. Even though his morning started off on a bad note, it gradually became better just like yesterday.

He had no idea how he did it. How he managed to be at ease and subsiding his nervousness. But as he tried to keep it up throughout the day, a new wave of guilt took over impulsively.

Michael couldn't keep staring at you while you were at work. Seeing you accompany the customers with their candies and prizes while leaning against the glass counter like that... your elbows pressing down, your arms relaxing on the surface, and your back arching slightly with your ass sticking out. As if you wanted him to see you like that from this distance; upstairs at the lounge area overlooking the pizzeria arcade.

He thought about the webcam sex you had with him last night. How you fingered yourself on your knees with your ass in the air. How much of a slick mess the both of you were. Your pretty cunt glimmering with your pussy juice from the sunset lamp lighting. As if he was staring at some magical oasis, basking in your seduction, melting at the sounds you make, and set ablaze from how insane you make him...

I was doing so good earlier. Now I'm fucking horny at work again.

Fantasies could only, unfortunately, remain as fantasies for Michael. When he's so fond of someone, specifically you, he'd hide away in his forbidden fantasies. Crushing over you that he's so curious about gives him a feeling of wanting to hide. Hide away in a safe place in his mind, imagining the infinite outcomes of fake scenarios.

What if I tell her?

What if I just tell her I'm Mike Shmidt?

What if, the more we get closer and closer throughout the days, I finally get it out of my system?

As much as Michael yearns for an opportunity to admit his truth and couldn't keep hiding this shit anymore, he's a coward deep down. He wonders about your reaction. How you would be able to process this information without ruining your work relationship. And hopefully not lead more suspicion to William, who already saw the both of you conversing and giggling together instead of working. But first, he needs to test the waters.

I wish I can be as bold as her and have no shame about what I do behind closed doors...

#( ♥︎ ) — prize counter girl.#michael afton x you #michael afton smut #fnaf smut #fnaf x reader #michael afton #michael afton x reader

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naamahdarling · 1 year

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Getting old is fundamentally stupid and unfair. Dad's the same fucking guy he has always been! Unbroken continuity between the guy who used to prank people with powdered root beer in their swim trunks at the public pool in the 50s and the guy who would pick me up by the wrists and ankles and sling me onto the big bed every time he got home from work in the 80s and the guy who taught me to drive in the middle of the Tallgrass Prairie. and the guy who has supported me my entire life. Like, same dude. Literally same dude. Zero difference, none. And someday not far in the future probably, he's just gonna quit, and like, you never stop growing and learning, just the other day I thought man, I'm really getting the hang of closing the dryer door just right and I am over 40 and I have really mastered the art of shaking out two ibuprofen and stopping the gas pump on the dollar and like do you understand, do you understand that this process never ends, ever, and when we die there are still unplumbed levels of proficiency for literally everything we do because we are the exact same people who were children who didn't know how to spell our names? And that is my dad right now with endless potential and a finite life and jesus christ it's so strange and unfair and stupid. Like fine I realize things have to die or they would get awfully crowded but that's a hell of a long view to take when it's you or someone you love. So now I'm just really confused because it all makes absolutely perfect sense of course but it's also just antithetical to what makes us individual people so I can't tell whether or not I'm okay. So I'm mega-hyperfocusing on my stupid OCs and drawing a bit and in the meantime every single other thing is falling by the wayside. I can't mail these packages, I can't thank people who have sent money, I can't list things for sale, I can't fundraise so we can get through this really rough patch, I can't clean anything. All my bandwidth is going towards this thing that isn't going to resolve anytime soon. They keep moving his surgery date and the date he can go home, but they do it by two days, three days, so there's never a fucking break, you can't trust it, you can't relax and iron out a schedule. It's like...AGAIN, he might have surgery tomorrow so today could be the last time I get to see him, and we have done this like three times now. I know there's very good reasons but I'm really tired of it. And Dad is going absolutely nuts cooped up in there.

I want off this ride and I don't have a choice about being on it, and it may end with legal problems and a scrap with Social Security, so that's even worse.

I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.

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mod2amaryllis · 8 months

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hi mod! you are the person i know who knows and is most excited about fish, and my favorite way to learn is to ask people whose passion and delight i am already familiar with. i know this is stuff i could find digging around on yt or search engines but it is just less fun and often less informative. but ofc feel free not to answer if you don't have the time/energy etc!

i am coming to realize that i would really like fish (after attempting to convince my wife that he would like them and then they pointed out that it kind of sounded like *i* wanted the fish and well). but i am very chronically ill (spend most of my time laying down in bed) and also poor. i'm worried about not being able to take care of them well enough.

assuming i restrain myself (that is don't deep dive into habitat design or breeding or anything beyond just having some guys to spend time with while i'm stuck in bed) what are the daily, weekly, monthly things i'd have to make sure got taken care of? are there ways i can simplify or automate tasks while not sacrificing their care?

OR do you know of good places where people have already talked about this, or other people who love fish a lot and might wanna share their knowledge?

my partner is also suggesting a plant&snail tank instead of fish but i'm even less sure how to approach their care needs!

watching you get into fish reminded me of how much i love them (had some when i was young but was not primary caretaker). it's good to see you make creatures so happy.

well thank you for reading and i hope you are having a good weekend!

ahhh weeee haha fish ask fish ask

there's definitely ways to make mega low maintenance tanks! what you're going for is overfiltering, understocking, and planting as much as possible. I'll go over those points. this got mega long so i'll put it under a cut.

overfiltering basically means bumping your filter up a size. if you have a 10g tank, get a 20g filter. this will reduce how often you need to maintain that filter. I'd recommend sponge filters, they're by far the cheapest option and imo easiest to maintain. you'll need the sponge and an air pump. i see a lot of mega reduced amazon sales for the tetra whisper air pump. depending on how dirty it gets you're looking at every 2-3 months taking it out into a bucket of clean tank water and squeezing out the gunk.

in that vein, you wanna get as big a tank as you can. seems counterintuitive, but the more water you have, the more stability. the less maintenance. so if you wanted a 5g for a betta, consider getting a 10g. if you want a little 10g nano school, get a 20g long. if you want a 20g community, get a 40g breeder. whatever's gonna fit in your space. my best recommendation for tank size is 20g long, it gives you sooo many options without being massive. if you're in America the cheapest way to get a tank is wait for Petco to have their quarterly tank sale. otherwise look for something on the local market.

now onto understocking. basically pick animals that aren't gonna shit that much lol, and put in less than can technically fit in the tank. the snail tank is a definite fun option, as long as you're sticking with pest snails and fewer large snails (big snails have a big bioload, even bigger than most fish). a planted 10g with a variety of big snails (a mystery, a rabbit, a nerite, etc), pest snails, and a few amano shrimp, would be fun and extremely low maintenance. you'd even have the option of trying some fancy shrimp, tho they might breed like crazy. if you want a tank with fish instead, i recommend getting a school of a tiny species like chili rasbora, ember tetras, pygmy corys, basically anything that stays little so you can get as many as possible without a big bioload. for schooling/shoaling fish, the more the merrier. absolutely do not get live bearers. no guppies, no mollies, no platys. that's the opposite of low maintenance. shit machines that will multiply forever, don't do it.

now. you know i love my bettas, favorite fish, but i'm always hesitant to recommend them. they're wonderfully personable but the caveat is that it seems more and more they run into health problems as they get commercially overbred. it's luck of the draw. you might get an easy buddy who can survive anything, or you'll get a sicky. most of the time my bettas are super low maintenance and rewarding, but when they ARE sick, it's hard. it can be daily water changes and treatment for weeks, and sometimes even that doesn't help in the end.

so with that said, my dream low maintenance tank stocking would be 20g long with 4 amano shrimp, 1 mystery snail, 1 rabbit snail, 1 nerite snail, and a school of around 15 nano fish (I'd do either chili rasbora or celestial pearl danio cuz they prettyyy). OR i'd just have a centerpiece in that big old tank, like 1 betta for the whole tank or a pair of sparkling gouramis. fish choice is definitely too much to get into for this post lol.

now third point, planting the crap out of it. this is where things can get expensive. i really do recommend investing in this step at setup, but try to cut costs by buying from local sellers, or even seeing if people are giving cuttings away. the lowest maintenance plants are ones that don't require trimming, like crypts, buce, anubias; these plants are gorgeous but they don't filter water that well. faster growing stem plants and floaters will REALLY help to filter the water, but require more maintenance via trimming and replanting stems (monthly) or removing overgrown floaters (weekly). hornwort and guppy grass are great options for something fast growing that you can just chuck in a tank, no need to plant. what I'd most highly recommend for the sake of lowering maintenance is adding some pothos cuttings coming out of the water. terrestrial plants are much better at filtering water than aquatic plants because of their direct co2 exposure, and I've had the most success with pothos! i also love a spider plant in water.

some other money specific points. for substrate, you can use rinsed play sand and/or pea gravel from a hardware store, but you would need to add nutrients if you have things planted into the substrate. you can add root tabs (api root tabs cost about 8 bucks a pack, but you need to replenish them every few months) or a small layer of aquasoil at the bottom. (aqueon has a little bag of shrimp/plant soil on amazon for i think 12 bucks). and the one thing you shouldn't go cheap on is the heater. their failure is more dangerous than other hardware because they tend to fail ON, aka they cook the water. you wanna make sure you trust it. the cheapest heater i trust are the aqueon preset submersible heaters, also frequently on sale. or you can forgo the heater and commit to only "cold" temperature livestock; the snails and amano shrimp idea would be fine w/o a heater.

labor specific points, once it's cycled (which can take weeks, during which time you'll do literally nothing to the tank) and stocked, it'll depend on how fast those plants eat up your nitrates on how often you do water changes. for me, i do 25% every two weeks on my 20g. it could probably stand to have more since mine is pretty overstocked but fish are ok to sit in slightly higher nitrates as long as they're used to it. when testing, i do recommend the api master test kit. it's more expensive than strips but way more accurate and it's lasted me longer than 2 tubes of strips. if you don't want to buy the test kit, just do water changes as often as you can. every 2 weeks if possible, then you can try pushing to 3 weeks, or even monthly.

get a water siphon to make it as easy as possible. empty water into a bucket on wheels so nobody has to carry anything. you can also look into getting a submersible pump with a long enough tube that you can empty water directly into the nearest drain, then to refill with clean water put a bucket in the sink with tap water, put the submersible pump in that bucket, and run the tube back to your tank, adding dechlorinator directly to the tank beforehand. just be careful with this method if you have small animals at risk of being caught in the siphon.

also, some people with planted tanks don't do water changes AT ALL. they just top off as water evaporates. what i do some would consider overkill, but i'm so frequent with my water changes because i have really hard water and there's this thing called old tank syndrome that can happen if you only top off, and yeah that's this other whole spiel lmao BUT not doing water changes IS possible, people have success. just not me!

so monthly tasks; rinsing sponge filter every 2-3 months. weekly tasks; depends on how often you decide to do water changes. daily tasks; feeding, frequency varies depending on livestock, but i basically feed once a day. if you're going for a self contained ecosystem low maintenance dealio, feed as little as possible. i know of people who do this and sprinkle in food weekly or less. i don't have experience with automatic feeders, but i'm wary of them lol, they could be totally fine, idk. it's better imo to just feed infrequently than risk the auto feeder dumping too much food.

to wrap it up, i'll be real with you, setting up something that's as low maintenance as possible while working with budget constraints is hard (at least in my area). this hobby is notoriously expensive, especially when you're just starting out. you need to see what the local market is like. see if there's fish hobby groups in your area that can help you with spare supplies and plant trimmings. your partner's idea of a plant/snail tank might be the best place to start! as far as other resources, the fish subreddits have soooooooooooo much info.

#fishblr #fish tag #m2a #m2answers #this got way to freaking long lol

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battlemaiden13 · 5 months

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Cool Idea for the MC's Soul in The House Next Door: What if Y/n's Soul was a white human soul that was holographic with the other soul colours? You could use it as a way to explain why she is so good with monsters and why she cares about them so much; because she has the same soul colour as a monster's soul. The holographic colours would be the normal human soul colours and she shows traits from all 7 of them. Cool Arc Idea: Y/n gets stuck in the void for a bit. (kind of relating to the white soul thing) Because her soul is white she didn't die as soon as she entered the void like other humans would have. While she is in the void maybe she could see some of the different Underground/Timelines. For a little bit of angst, she could maybe see some of the Genocide runs in the different undergrounds. All of the monster back home could either forget her because she is in the void or they could be the only ones that remember her and all the humans have forgotten her (some fun angst for the brothers). They have to try and convince Error and the other hotel members to help search for her once they figure out that she is in the void. Meanwhile Y/n has been in the void, which feels like forever, when she meets another copy of herself (Maybe this one got lost in the void or something. Either way she basically lives in the void) She explains briefly the trauma that most of the sans/papyruses have gone through because of us humans and that she hopes y/n can help change the world for the better (something cheesy like that) The boys save her from the void. arc over. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Story Ideas for you, you can use, change and expand on them however you like :D Have Fun <3 I love your story so much its so comforting for me

OMG so this sort of fits in with an arch Idea I already have planned. I don't think I'm ever going to give MC's soul a color cause they are an insert so people can choose but the holographic idea is so cool! I could totally see that working!

As for the story idea part I love it. I am defiantly using parts of it. As I said it already fits so well with an arch I'm planning. My big multiverse crossover with all the MC ehehe I'm so pumped for it. And Error was already gonna save them anyway but I didn't think of the void. I knew I wanted to put them in like a crossway between all the dimensions but I didn't think of the void! And a mega powerful MC heck yeah, she gonna wreck some shit up!

Oh this is gonna be fun. Thank you hehehe

#hnd #house next door #housenextdoor #hnd ideas

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mollisangelus · 2 years

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Red Is My Favorite Color

Yandere! Alpha! KiriBaku x Omega! Reader

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7

A/N: Well, we've come so far and well awaited smut is just around the corner. Please heed the warnings below, people!! I only mainly ended it the way I did, because I didn't want to make a super long post and decided the finale would have to be in 2 parts.

TW: Mention on noncon, chasing, kidnapping, forced nudity, self hating thoughts, manipulation.

♡———♡

You sighed, more tired than ever, and a dull ache in your abdomen. Your skin felt heated, like you were growing a fever, and it was awful. Happy to know that they'd both be asleep when you got home, you opened the door and hung your bag on the wall. You were slumped and tugged your shoes off quickly, not bothering to put them on the rack, you just needed to get to your room, quickly, before this ache became more.

You felt dizzy as you hurried there, stumbling with your footsteps. Everything was so quiet as you did, and a bad feeling crept up your spine with each footfall.

You just needed to get to your room, is what you reminded yourself.

It wasn't long until you finally did, hand finding the cool doorknob in the darkness, and you quickly turned it as if you were trying to escape something, your heart hammering in your chest, adrenaline pumping for no reason. You felt like a little kid again, afraid of the dark. Your door swinging open, you shuffled in, until two very strong scents had you freezing. Their scents were intense, even with your blockers on, which helped you as much as the people around you.

Your skin felt hot, too hot, and you felt gross in your clothes now, the scents overwhelming you in your heated state.

The dull ache in you, throbbed, and you knew it wouldn't be long until your heat hit full force. Before they could say a single word, you spit out, "Get out."

You sounded strained, like you were trying to stay collected as you moved more into the room. You pointed to the door, eyes zeroed in on them, battling with your omega. "I didn't invite you into my nest." You tried to play the aggression off as instincts, but it was mainly fear.

"You didn't have to. I know all about nesting omegas, and our items in your nest is invitation enough, your omega must be soaring right now."

Bakugou had always been harsh, handling things with intimidation and logical thinking instead of his emotions, you shouldn't have been surprised, and you weren't, but nonetheless your body loved the way he talked. A chill running down your spine.

"Get. Out." You were nearly grinding your teeth at this point, they couldn't stay here. You were losing it, little by little. It was too much, their scents, their presence, their voices. It was all too much.

"So agressive for a little 'mega. What're you gonna do?" Bakugou antagonized. You expected Kirishima to say something, usually he did when Bakugou got out of hand, but he just sat there, silent. It was then that you looked at him, and he seemed torn. Almost as much as you were.

"Why are you guys even in here?! We obviously can't talk about me being an omega right now! I'm going into heat!" You shouted, frustrated at this point. What was their deal?

Kirishima stood at that, and Bakugou seemed to move too, a step closer to you. "Were here because you're in heat. We've already made the decision to help you through everything, this included." Kirishima finally spoke, like the decision was final, and you had no say.

Your eyes widened at that, and then you realized why they were moving.

Then you ran.

The last thing you heard was the word shit as you bolted off, flying to the front door as you fumbled with the locks as quick as you could. Bakugou was the more agile one, and was a few feet from you when they came undone. As soon as you could, you pulled the door open as hard you could, effectively hitting him in the face as you rushed out. You couldn't believe what was happening.

The adrenaline in you helped you ignore the pain in your gut and the disgusting heat all over you, but you knew it would only last so long, plus your heat would just help them and any other alphas you ran into. You had to be smart about this. Your scent blockers were still on, and that helped, as long as you could get to a crowded space. No one would try anything there.

Your thoughts were racing as you rushed down the steps and out of the lobby of the apartment building as fast as possible, you couldn't believe your luck when you stepped out in rain, it would help perfectly with dampening your scent. You could survive this, you knew you could. Once you were outside, you were sure.

Bounding down the street, you tried your best to round corners, and once you were a block or two away, you looked behind you, trying to see where they were. When you found nothing, you were confused. Where had they gone? Your whole body whipped around now as you searched the area.

Then you felt it, a hand over yours, pulling you back and grabbing your other. "God, why couldn't you have just been good. Can't you see we just want to take care of you? Stupid idiot." Bakugou's gruff voice in your ear as he held you back. You thrashed and fought, screaming for help as loud as you could. The rain was pouring too hard, no one would hear you, especially as Kirishima came your view and covered your mouth effectively.

"You gotta calm down, Sweets. We didn't want to just rush into anything sexual, we wanted to talk first, but now you've gotten all of us all riled up. Your heat is gonna hit full force by the time we get back.. This would've gone a lot smoother if you just listened, Hun." He seemed so nice talking like that, like a parent teaching a child. It made it all the worse when guilt crept into your mind, and it actually felt like maybe this could've been better if you did. You were so stupid, weren't you? That's why life always seemed so spiteful, because you were just so dumb.

You stopped struggling after that, letting them effectively bring you back without a fight. I mean, what were you supposed to do at this point? You obviously couldn't make any good decisions. Bakugou's grip seemed to relax the more you showed compliance. You were even more grateful for the rain as you came inside, relaxing and allowing your heat to come in. You knew if you weren't soaked in water that was cooling you down with the AC in the building, you'd be groaning from the heat your clothes caused.

A part of you hoped someone would walk down the hallway and see you, make a scene, help you. It was too late at night, and not a single soul came. You knew screaming wouldn't help, it would just make them angry, and you didn't have the strength in you to fight with your heat settling in. Your wishful thinking and stomach dropped as you entered the apartment again. A sigh came from Kirishima, and the jingle of Roofus' dog collar alerted you he was nearby. You didn't hear what Kirishima said, but you figured he was leading the pup to his bed, Bakugou didn't wait for him as he brought you back to your room. Once in, he let you stand.

"Strip." Was all he said.

You were shocked about how forward he was, were they really going to rape you? You couldn't stand the thought, shaking a little, too overwhelmed by everything going on.

He sighed and stepped closer. "Chill out, I'm not going to do anything, you just need to fucking change." With that, he was helping you with your shirt over your head. Too afraid, too overwhelmed still, you just helped him remove your wet clothes and watched him as he tossed them back out into the hallway. "Now sit in your nest until we come back. If you run again," there was a long pause as his mouth settled into a grim line, "I can't promise to be as nice." His voice lowered, and you knew it wasn't just a threat, but that he might not be able to control himself.

You quickly did as you were told, sitting in your nest, naked, not needing to curl up, the sweat growing on your skin enough to keep you there. He gave you a final look before he left, and you felt so lost about your situation.

What were they going to do, what did they want? Did they just want to use you after they found out you were an omega? Were they crazy? Well, obviously, but how crazy?

Your thoughts were pulled away from you as they both returned, both just in shorts and boxers, and without a word, clothes were thrown to you. They landed on you, a baggy tshirt and boxers. They must like you in this, since they kept putting you in it. You put the clothes on as they settled themselves in your nest, your space, uninvited.

"We're not going to do anything, but we will need to talk. All the action tonight must have stressed out your omega and the beginning of your heat will be wonky, so we're going to sleep first." Was all Kirishima said.

You were confused at first, but as they settled in your area, and they guided you with them, you found yourself sandwiched between the two males, and quickly falling to sleep with Kirishima's pets and whispers, and Bakugou's cozy smell.

Taglist: @skylan666

#yandere bnha x reader #katsuki bakugou #kiribaku #mha kirishima #kirishima x you #kirishima x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou x fem!reader #yandere themes #yandere #a/b/o

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