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archer-kacey · 1 month

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Shawn Flynn (Analysis)

Let's talk about my favorite JDS weirdo!

We first hear Shawn's voice in Bendy and the Ink Machine, but Joey also mentions him in Illusion of Living in passing.

Joey mentions two things here, firstly that Shawn does "an excellent job." I know Joey lies more than a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar, but considering the fact that JDS is held together with duct tape and rubber bands, I'm inclined to believe him here. After all, how the hell could they keep up with demands (so much so that the Alice dolls were overstocked) if the foreman fucked off constantly.

Joey also says that Shawn's "creativity knows no bounds." Makes sense for his position, but also helps confirm that Joey does think highly of him in terms of his work. On a personal level, though, maybe not so much.

Based on Joey's insistence for perfection, we can infer that Shawn, like many, was just trying to do his damn job, and Joey blew his lid when things weren't exactly to his liking.

Shawn also mentions that the Alice merchandise wasn't selling well, and offhandedly proposes that they may have to melt the remaining stock down in order to get rid of it. Pretty self-explanatory tape, all things considered.

(The Bendy Wiki also mentions that he has a Dublin accent. I am not at all an expert on ANYTHING Irish but I did find out that Jacksepticeye is from Offaly, Ireland (Midland/East Ireland) and Dublin is also part of East Ireland, so...I'm assuming this is correct.)

There is also an easter egg with the Seeing Tool in BATIM written over Shawn's audio log, though this is mostly a nod to his voice actor.

Anyway, onto Boris and the Dark Survival.

In BATDS, Shawn mentions that he bought a new belt, (a one-of-a-kind toolbelt apparently,) and it was stolen immediately the next day. The perpetrator was a Gent employee, and they very brazenly wore it around right after stealing it. We aren't sure who this employee is, that's mostly speculation. But I don't think that's the point- this odd anecdote represents some of the first seeds of distrust being sown between JDS and Gent employees.

This brings us to Dark Revival.

Funnily enough, I find Shawn's departure from the studio much more interesting than his actual time employed there.

Firstly, Shawn mentions that Joey took it well when he decided to leave. Between the shift towards Gent's experiments and new technology, the funding from Gent, and the sudden irrelevance of having Bendy merch going out in droves, it's possible that Joey just didn't care.

Shawn also seems to give zero fucks about Joey's opinion, based on his Dark Revival and Bendy audio logs, which I find fucking hilarious. Not the first disgruntled employee, but certainly the most confident when faced with Joey himself.

He mentions wanting to find a cabin upstate, see some open sky, and start anew with his family. Overall it seems like leaving JDS gave him a more hopeful lens on life.

But the MOST headscratching thing about his parting audio log is the last few lines;

"But before I go, I've made one last toy. A little parting present for the factory lads. Let's see how long it takes them to find it."

We never hear from Shawn again, so we have NO IDEA WHAT THIS MEANS LMAO. Leave it to Shawn to be mysterious for no apparent reason.

However, there is a possible connection to be made. In the Heavenly Toys area, there's a factory output sheet slapped on one of the walls.

The last column mentions a "Bendy Starface Stuffed Toy", which we've never seen presently. There was only one ever made, and after that it was immediately discontinued.

I don't know why it would be listed at all if Shawn did leave the Starface Bendy as a gift, so this may all be a dead end. (I'm also aware that this might be a "Scarface" reference, although I really don't know what that has to do with anything.) Regardless, I find it a weird coincidence that Shawn left a single toy behind, and Starface also seems to be a completely unique Bendy toy.

TL;DR Shawn Flynn is cool and might have left an Among Us plushie at the studio for his co-workers

#also how many malewife toymakers is Jacksepticeye going to act for because he's done 2 so far #shawn flynn #jacksepticeye #bendy and the ink machine #batim #bendy and the dark revival #batdr #boris and the dark survival #batds

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carrottyshark · 10 months

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ooh oc post! i never saw you talk about your oc(s), not that i'm following you for a long time but anyway!! will you tell me about them 👀

RU! HELLO!!!

I didn't expect to get an ask about my OCs in this time, but I did talk? about them before from an ask, which is on the left.

Thing is, it's been a long while and I've sort of drifted off from them. Recently, I've been thinking about a pair of OCs more inclined and focused on the Milgram theme which is on the right! (So that I can match what my blog is mostly focused on as well. Although, I'm more focused on their backgrounds rather than their current Milgram state.) You inspired me to draw the mini reference sheet of them, so thank you! I'll add a short description of each of their lives below too, but it's not fully fleshed out yet since this is pretty recent XD

Fair warning, some of what I'll mention can be upsetting and will contain suicide, abuse, drugs, murder, and violence.

Small background, but this would mostly take place in the slums, and one would know what to assume in places like this. This got a bit long, sorry!

So before Milgram, Krow was a troubled teen. The core reason he landed in Milgram was due to his mentality of "ending things from the root" which shaped him this way thanks to his past. Having a shitty life at home led by parents who only want to meet their end, at one point he's figured the only way out was by force, and kills his parents, whom he deems to be the root, or the cause. Around this time, Milgram doesn't register this yet, and his life continues. (Man, I just realized how edgy this sounds, he would possibly be a year or so younger when this happened, anyway continuing.)

A year or so figuring out a way through life, although going more and more downhill, he finds his way to the slums. His life by himself wasn't as bad as he thought, but it wasn't too great either. He moves from place to place, some taking him for a few days, but at the end of the day the entire environment he was in could only do so much. He could only get as much pay as well, along with the side jobs he could get and handle. His knowledge and experience did increase, and he's thankful, as a person who's killed his parents, he'd always had lingering doubts. That his mentality might as well be who he really is, but he thought that might not be the case after all.

There in the slums, he meets Yui. They get along, and even with a rough life, she still tries to find places she thought he could at least stay in, give him as much food as she can, and managed to help him. It doesn't take long for Krow to learn about her rough life; in a place filled with drug abusers, Yui receives the terrible end from both of her parents, things unimaginable. He figures the way out was none other than back then, and he strikes for the kill. Running wouldn't get them anywhere with their deteriorating state, and they wouldn't be able to recover in time if they're continued to be pushed down.

Yui is a kind person to a fault, frustratingly so, and doesn't let this happen. She didn't want him to be a killer, and at the very start, she had always wanted to take her own life, but she just couldn't.

The catch? Krow had already killed someone. This was something he admitted, but regardless she never wanted him to harm anyone ever again. Out of all options, one day, Yui tries to stab herself to end it all. Krow intervenes of course, and what he thought that he'd long forgotten comes back again, his idea of simply "ending things from the root". He kills Yui himself, to which she didn't want. He tries to kill himself after, but he end up not doing it. Here she unravels the truth he's always avoided, that yet being so similar, they're also both vastly different. She would never hurt anyone, no matter what she's faced, the very thing he's done now. Worse, it was something she didn't actually want. Was it out of desperation that she didn't actually want to die? Was it because she didn't want him to be a killer? Was it something else? It was too late and he'll never figure it out.

She also made him realize things aren't entirely black and white, like his household, like how the people in the slums ended up, simply killing her, or anyone else, can't be the only option. Right? He tries to end things for himself too, but he ends up not being able to, and his only way was to move forward. This time vowing he wouldn't hurt again.

Cue Milgram, which would be a few years after, and he'd be around 21-23. I don't really know how to insert him in the canon story, and even figure out the timeline plus time gap, but for the sake of the idea I had, Mahiru, especially T2, would be who he's going to be connected to most, for the better or worse.

So the question, Would the cycle continue?

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

And that's it! Thank you if you read this far! Since the focus was more on Krow, Yui got a bit overshadowed, but I do treasure her as much (if not more.) One thing I want to point out as well is the symbolism I have for them, because I fricking love symbolism:

The Cosmos symbolize Yui as a flower, before he "pulls it from its roots" and hangs it by rope.

Essentially, most plants grow fuller only when cut, and this is the case for Krow (similarly Yui). Having endured too many hardships, he's grown the most, but anything too much is a bad thing. The flower that would symbolize him would be Black Dahlias.

Orange Cosmos in flower language means resilience when healing oneself, and also forgiveness.

They both have plant clippers, symbolizing how they can harm either their own self or someone else. Krow's is rusted for obvious reasons, meanwhile Yui's isn't.

The rope itself is a metaphor about how Krow kills the person "for them", as so far the people he had killed were those he thought and deemed to "not want to live" anymore. He also happens to like dried flowers.

He brought the two hair bands Yui uses to Milgram.

The flowers that would symbolize Krow's deceased parents would be Yellow Carnations and White Roses.

Some other stuff! This is the audio I was continuously listening to and thought would work if he had a song.

(I don't really know the lyrics, I just liked the vibe LMAO)

youtube

Finally, this is the closest thing to Krow wearing a Milgram prisoner outfit (I didn't really think I'd be too into it before and just drew for something for the heck of it but here we are now.)

Thank you again if you read this far!

#Ah yes 'I will make a happy OC' turned into 'Poor thing suffering so much... would be a shame if I add M O R E'#Although technically Krow and Yui have been an OC of mine for a while... just not in the way that they are Milgram style #So technically they're happy and are just acting for it? :D Like an AU?#Sorry if this got angsty Ru... ;; I PROMISE THEY'RE ORIGINALLY HAPPY #Also looking back this entire thing feels like a mix of Shidou and Mahiru's story... looks like they got the most impact on me.. maybe #Also the whole OCs resemble the Creator thing? Yeae I suck at character design.#I actually had no idea what to do with Krow's straps so I just went to hell with it #thank you for the ask!#carrotty art old and new #ocarrotty

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 1 year

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AUGHHH I don't know what happened but an ask got deleted! I am so sorry @doves-fandomstuff, I think you were asking about what might happen next in the Meursault arc and I really enjoyed the ramble you had before but... *sob* it's gone...

Anyways, I'm really hoping we get at least one more chapter before a pov change, since I think it makes little sense to switch back now. See, now that we know Dazai wants the info from Dostoevsky to help the Agency, it'd be a little weird to switch without... actually moving the plot forward at all... idk. I guess we'll see but I really do hope it's not another nine months.

The fun thing about this arc is that

a) it is all these characters at their absolute pettiest (so it's funny as heck)

and b) there are so many characters with their own agendas right now and so many different things they could decide to do

Who's going to move the plot forward? It's hard to say and a lot of things could go right now.

Fyodor: He could manage to escape. He could be killed. He had some reason for picking Chuuya of all people. We still don't know what he intends for the world. I am inclined to think he is only pretending to work for Fukuchi. I honestly think it is far too soon to kill him off.

Dazai: Again, same as above. I don't really think Dazai will die, as his arc is all about finding some reason to live - him dying would seriously detract from that. However, I could see a version of events play out where everyone thinks he's dead. (I know we're tired of the fake out deaths at this point but I think this one could legitimately be interesting...)

Sigma: We have to be building up to something with him. I think Sigma might be the one to get the information somehow, or have an epic moment of some kind. Be great if he was able to transmit info to Atsushi so that Atsushi could finish the arc with that initiative he just found the will for.

Chuuya: Come on. He's got to do something to change things up. Though I've said before how nervous I am about the potential use of Corruption given that Fyodor knows about it... fear...

Gogol: Oh boy. The wildcard of the group. I'm inclined to think he won't stay uninvolved in all this. Will he help Dazai? Fyodor? Mess up both of them? Help both? Who knows?

They've all got different motives here. Fyodor was in the prison for some unknown reason, but it seems he just needs to get out. Perhaps he already accomplished what he came there for. Dazai needs the information from Fyodor to help the Agency, so his job is already a lot harder. Sigma just wants to survive, poor guy, but he's also tired of being used and has just figured out that the Agency and Dazai have a mutually helpful relationship - neither is using the other. I suspect he'll be joining the Agency after. At least I hope so. Chuuya also doesn't want to be controlled. We don't know what he was doing when he got turned, but his priority is to the Mafia and its safety, so he will continue to fight for that. And Gogol wants his freedom above all. I am unsure whether he will continue to seek it through destroying Fyodor and therefore his attachment to him, or whether he will decide he'd be unhappy without him (as with Poe about Ranpo) - but either way is very compelling.

I, personally, hope for a chapter where Chuuya turns on Fyodor in an epic way, which in turn inspires Sigma to take action.

I also really hope for more Gogol focus. I don't talk about him a lot but I really should. He's an excellent character who could really go in many directions at this point in the story, and all would be very, very compelling!

#thanks for the ask!#...if it was actually here... i am so sorry again i don't know what happened #bsd #bsd spoilers #bsd chapter 105.5 #bsd fyodor #bsd dazai #bsd sigma #bsd chuuya #bsd gogol #storyrambles

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novelmonger · 5 days

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Let's see... how about Jyn Erso and 2, 3, 6, 12, and 15??

-Rain

(Sorry it took me a while to respond to this. I took this as an excuse to watch Rogue One again before I replied, so it would be fresh in my mind ^^')

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

I love that moment when they're in Jedha, and there's suddenly an attack by rebels that they get caught up in, and Jyn runs out of cover to save a little girl who's crying in the street. Up to that point, Jyn has mostly been presented as a hardened, cynical person who's just looking out for herself, but this is one of the first indications we get that she's more selfless than she tries to act.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

I don't know if this exactly counts, but while I like Jyn's character arc, I have to admit that it's a bit rushed. I get it, they've only got two hours to tell the story, and I do think it makes sense for her to change her tune about helping the Rebellion because of reuniting with her father. But the change is a bit abrupt for a medium where we don't get access to her personal thoughts and feelings.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

We both have brown hair. Uh...wow, I don't think we have much in common at all. Well, I hate to admit it, but my natural inclination is a lot like Jyn at the beginning of the movie, when asked how she can stand to see the Imperial flag flying across the galaxy. "It's not a problem if you don't look up." I'm not proud of it, but I can absolutely relate to that perspective.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

Ummmm...I don't know that I have any? So I'm just going to say something that I kept thinking about during the movie instead: If they ever get around to making a Mistborn movie, Felicity Jones would be way too old (she is somehow already 40 years old aldkfjs;dlkfjdslj what is life), but I think she would have made a great Vin. The look is right, and I think she'd do a great job at portraying the combination of hardened street urchin and vulnerable girl who just wants to belong and feel safe. Alas! I know it will never happen.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

Uhhh...is there any ship that makes even the slightest amount of sense besides Jyn/Cassian? The only other possibilities that are coming to mind are total crack ones like...K2SO XD

Incidentally, while I like Jyn and Cassian as a couple well enough, one of the things I really appreciate about Rogue One is that it doesn't have them kiss or talk about the hinted romantic feelings at all. Unlike many action movies that move the romance way too fast - especially when the writers know all too well that these characters are going to die in the end and thus don't have much time - Rogue One treats these characters and their growing attraction realistically. These characters are way too busy saving the galaxy to waste time on pursuing each other romantically. Also, they seem like the kind of people who would take a long time before they really let their walls down enough for that anyway, even with someone they've clearly made a connection with and trust to watch each other's back.

Restraint in a movie is always something I will appreciate.

Character Ask Game

#ask and you shall receive #a2on1break #ask games #star wars #rogue one #jyn erso

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pesterloglog · 9 days

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Rose Lalonde, Dirk Strider

Act 1, page 610-614

ROSEBOT: Looks like you're getting pretty good at motivational speaking.

DIRK: Well someone needed to shake the rust off of her.

DIRK: She's getting nerves.

DIRK: Right before the big game.

DIRK: We're never gonna make it to nationals at this rate.

ROSEBOT: Ah, fuck. The sports.

ROSEBOT: How quickly I forgot them.

DIRK: There's gotta be some kind of sports penalty, for forgetting the sports.

ROSEBOT: Oh, definitely.

ROSEBOT: I've been very bad and I need to be punished, to preserve the integrity of the sports.

DIRK: Let me just slip into my jackass sports judge mime outfit and get to laying down the fucking sports law.

ROSEBOT and DIRK: Let's stop saying sports.

DIRK and ROSEBOT: Agreed.

DIRK: Speaking of outfits, though, look at you.

ROSEBOT: You like it?

DIRK: It's chic.

DIRK: I dig the return of the hood.

DIRK: You could deliver a whole hell of a lot of cryptic prophecies out from under that sucker.

ROSEBOT: Yes, well, I figured that if I'm to appear before our chosen peoples as a harbinger of their simultaneous doom and salvation, I may as well look the part.

DIRK: Do you feel the part?

ROSEBOT: It doesn't really matter what I feel.

ROSEBOT: We have a job to do, and I'm trying to enjoy myself to the best of my ability while we do it.

DIRK: Trying, huh.

ROSEBOT: Speaking frankly, I've grown tired of...

ROSEBOT: This.

ROSEBOT: Fussing over all the tedious minutiae of getting the baby's room ready.

ROSEBOT: The prospect of this Contest was entertaining to me for a time, but the longer it drags on, the closer we draw to the due date, the more it... repulses me.

ROSEBOT: I'm glad you've agreed that we're basically done tinkering here. I don't think I have much more patience for it.

DIRK: I can tell.

ROSEBOT: I'm also glad you've elected to hear Terezi out vis-a-vis the timeskip and save us the hassle of guiding the Deltritans manually.

ROSEBOT: I know it must be hard for you.

ROSEBOT: Dirk?

ROSEBOT: Dirk.

DIRK: Sorry.

DIRK: Got caught up with something.

ROSEBOT: Far be it from me to stand between you and your enigmatic somethings.

DIRK: You're welcome to stand wherever you like.

DIRK: Anyway, no, it isn't that hard for me.

DIRK: It'd be fun, but as I keep having to explain to people, I'm willing to compromise on certain points.

DIRK: Though I will say it's unfortunate to hear you making them, instead of our complainer on retainer.

ROSEBOT: What can I say?

ROSEBOT: I don't feel particularly inclined to play house right now.

DIRK: Not even with me, huh?

ROSEBOT: Not even with you.

ROSE: Thank you for taking me with you, Dirk.

DIRK: Yeah?

ROSE: I may be less than enchanted with this stage of the work, but I know it's important.

ROSE: It's just straying dangerously close to a lot of things I'm trying not to fixate on right now.

ROSE: Wounds that are still fresh, for me as a sum and for the myriad legions of my parts.

ROSE: Home.

ROSE: Family.

ROSE: Petty, little things.

ROSE: Personal things.

DIRK: Those are important, too.

ROSE: Not as important as this is.

ROSE: For all my temporary discomfort with the prospect of settling down on Deltritus and starting what could very loosely be considered a family with you, I want you to know that my heart is in what we're working towards-

DIRK: Technically, you don't have a heart.

ROSE: Shut up.

ROSE: - and that I'm happy to be here with you.

ROSE: Not drifting around in a constrictive, small pond, getting caught up in trivialities like politics and celebrity and romance,

ROSE: But saving the fucking universe.

DIRK: ...

DIRK: Well.

DIRK: You're welcome.

DIRK: I don't think there's anyone I'd rather be doing this with than you.

DIRK: The rest of them just don't have it in them right now to understand what it is we're fighting for, here.

DIRK: They can't grasp the stakes.

DIRK: Even now, they're on their way here, actively trying to stop us from saving them all.

DIRK: They'll probably catch us right before our entrance into the Game, actually.

DIRK: I won't insult you by asking if you're going to be okay when the time comes to face them, demanding answers they won't accept to questions they aren't even asking, because I know that you will.

DIRK: So I'm glad to have you with me.

DIRK: I'm glad you understand.

DIRK: I'm doing this for all of us.

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #homestuck^2 act 1 #rose lalonde #rosebot #dirk strider #page 610 #page 611 #page 612 #page 613 #page 614

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firstaidspray · 8 months

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2, 4, 9, 29, 35, 66 for Anabel/Raphael 👀👀👀

How did they get together? Sooooo Anabel kinda...took the deal. She did it. She chose possibly the stupidest and worst way to get help. She signed a contract with him. And as we see in the game, picking certain choices (and Haarlep copying your form so Raphael could use it...) get Raphael to become pretty err...fond of you. He clearly has a thing for the player. So naturally I was like, fuck yeah, he'd get with Anabel!! Anyways, Anabel signed a contract with Raphael, yes, but it was a different contract than he'd give to anyone else...one part of it was that essentially bound them romantically. A marriage certificate of sorts. The fact that this self obsessed devil was so enamored with Anabel, that he'd want to be with her (even, potentially, in the proxy form of Haarlep since they can take her form now), is just kind of insane, and learning about that piece of the contract, Anabel was not shocked or mad, but overjoyed, because the second they met, Anabel was instantly wrapped around his finger. TLDR: Raphael's feelings for Anabel were revealed through a clause in her contract and now they're basically married.

What’s the relationship like? Smooth? Rocky? It's mostly smooth, but has its rocky moments, mostly in the form of Anabel being a brat sometimes, and not in the kinky way. She'll do something he doesn't like, they'll fight, fuck, make up. Otherwise it's pretty great- being an evil little demon who's married to the devil is a nice life for her, and having an evil little demon wife who does (mostly) whatever you want is a nice life for him.

Who is more inclined to be jealous or possessive? Raphael 10000000%. I mean he's the devil and he literally wrote their relationship being official into existence in her demonic pact with him, of course he's insanely possessive of her. Whoever looks at her with the smallest amount of lust or infatuation is going to experience the worst that the hells have to offer. Anabel, however, is also very jealous and possessive- at first, when she and Raphael became official and Haarlep was still around (eventually they come and go as they please since Anabel fills their role), she lowkey hated them. Eventually they made peace and some literal devil threesomes happen on occasion, but she was pretty jealous of them for a bit.

What do they do after a hard day at work? Raphael's "work" is...mysterious. He's the devil. Is his job really that hard? I wouldn't think so. Anabel's is, though, so a nice period of resting in the house of hope with some drinks, sensual moments, and sleeping together (in both senses of the phrase) is what she likes to have after she's been out adventuring all day. Raphael, being with Anabel for some time, has come around on being a selfish bastard and will treat her to a nice night like that if she's had a particularly rough day. He'll even do all the work in bed for once!!

How do they spend time if the other is gone? Raphael watches her. He does say he can always watch over her in-game, after all. Anabel just sits around and pouts when Raphael is gone, she's like that spongebob scene "what do you do while I'm gone?" "Wait for you to get back" LMAOOO

Do either of them have a crazy ex? I'd assume Raphael probably does have some, he is thousands of years old after all. But none that are a bother to them now. Anabel does and yet doesn't (its complicated) but don't worry, Raphael takes care of them.

Thank you so much for asking about the demon bastards!! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

#anabel lee #bg3 anabel #my ocs #ask game #x: a little more than sympathy #bg3 spoilers #just in case any of the raphael stuff is spoilery

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barrenclan · 2 years

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Actually wait I do have a legit question but idk if I’m gonna word it right.

How do you manage to balance multiple large projects out like this? Like you already have tds, and now this story, along with other irl things like college and what not I’m assuming. Just asking as someone who is VERY bad at managing multiple things at once, its interesting how you’re able to pull it off well. (Yes I know you’ve just begun this, but clearly you already have some planning already.)

Oh yeah I'm supremely busy right now haha! Classes + honors leading + independent research + generally just Living is on my IRL plate, and for my art projects I'm working on TDS, PATFW, and also my RVB Trek series. Oh, and a few MAPs/MAP parts, too. And I do unrelated artwork sometimes too. And I'm reading the whole ASOIAF series this semester. But I don't have a job right now, so... that's something!

I guess for me, staying balanced involves a lot of organization; like, I use a whiteboard to track out all my assignments & responsibilities with the due-dates so I can see what needs to be done Now and what I can do over the weekend, etc. I have one both for art and for schoolwork. And honestly, I think after working on a comic for multiple years I've just kind of gotten using to sneaking time to draw where I can? I do a lot of it in the evening, or wherever I had a chance to sit down with my tablet. Drawing is my relaxation time, so it's not ever a chore, especially because I watch/listen to things while doing it.

Also, I do a lot of buffer. TDS has about nine pages worth of buffer right now, because I finished a lot of pages in the summer, which translates to almost two months of updating without technically needing to draw another page. (Even though I do draw pages, to stay around that number.) PATFW is also buffered, although not as much since I just started - only a single issue ahead so far.

And I'm not gonna lie, I don't have a very big social life outside of seeing a few friends every week. But I am someone who makes two Warriors OC webcomics, so I'm not terribly inclined to being social anyways. I get enough of what I need to stay sane.

One thing I try my best not to sacrifice is sleep, though. I believe incredibly deeply in the importance of a good night's sleep and I try to never go to bed later than half-past midnight. That takes priority over classes, which take priority over hobbies. It takes a lot of discipline but I guess that's how I've built it!

That was a very long, rambly answer, sorry, but I hope you kind of got what you were looking for out of it anyways.

#ask #chatter

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green-meanies · 2 years

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AU where the Gangreen Gang grew apart and departed early into their adulthood. What would their lives be like? Would it have changed for the better or worse? What careers would they have? Do they still commit "petty" crimes or would they have matured past that? Would they have families, or would they stay single? Would their relationship with the Powerpuff Girls improve or stay the same?

aaaaaa anon why must you hurt me like this 😭 it's so hard for me to picture them separating but I’ll do my best just for you

So I imagine as they get older they mellow out, and as they mellow out, they become less inclined to commit crimes. Let's say they finally get some much needed help and are given the chance to turn their lives around. As a result they do end up on better terms with the ppg. Buttercup less so, but eventually those issues get mended too. Some of their petty crimes were done out of survival as kids, so I think they would still commit a few out of habit, especially once they all start living on their own, but it would gradually stop once they were stable.

Ace seems pretty straightforward, given he winds up with Gorillaz lol. Once he has his act (mostly) together he decides to take playing bass more seriously. He auditions for some gigs, results are mixed since his green skin is off-putting to most people, but sometimes it's overlooked in favor of his talent, and some think it’s part of the act. He gains a cult following in more niche circles, which Ace is happy with, as it was more than he was expecting. During this time he keeps in contact with Murdoc after their first meeting, somewhat sporadic, but he does tell him about his latest gig or asks for advice. Does a bit of traveling across states as he looks for gigs, doesn’t really have a home in the traditional sense, but he never really did so it doesn’t bother him much. Works the occasional odd job when money is tight, and he is always keeping tabs on his boys. One day he's contacted by Russel asking him to fill in for Murdoc, and the rest is history :]

Snake probably struggles the most to adjust to living by himself. All of them have this issue to some degree, but being by himself brings back bad memories for Snake. He stays behind in Townsville since the idea of being alone in an unfamiliar city terrifies him. As a result, he's usually the one who coordinates get-togethers when the rest of the gang come to visit. He lands a job as a mechanic (with the girls' help) since he always had a knack for knowing his way around vehicles. Got himself a pet to help ease his anxieties, though I'm not sure what kind. Maybe a dog or a cat. Maybe a snake too, for theming lol. He calls each gang member on their designated day of the week. Monday is Ace, Tuesday is Grubber, and so on. Occasionally the Utonium family come visit, or they invite him to dinner, and they kinda become his second family.

Grubber had a hard time finding work, given that his appearance would usually scare off potential employers, and even if it didn't they wouldn't be able to understand him anyway. But he did manage to find a career in music. He would upload pieces online and he quickly gained a following, becoming quite successful without anyone ever seeing his face. It also allows him to interact with fans through comments. He's well known for his versatility in genres, concepts, and instruments, and it landed him some nice gigs for various pieces of media, as well as any royalties those would entail. He makes sure to stay in contact with the others, especially Ace as a fellow musician. He is fascinated by the mainstream music scene and Gorillaz' escapades as told by Ace. He and Ace are currently collaborating on an experimental EP album.

Lil' Arturo actually grows a little taller! (finally having a healthier diet had something to do with it lol) He finally gets the chance to pursue his interest in history, and goes on to become a museum curator specializing in ancient history. He travels quite a bit as part of his job, so he often brings little trinkets and souvenirs from touristy gift shops home to his buddies. He doesn't use Maria as much anymore after a few teeth broke off the comb part, but he still carries her in his pocket as a comfort thing. When it comes to the gang all catching up, he has the most stories to tell, and he would love for them all to visit some of these places with him one day. Also has a girlfriend, because the short king deserves it 👑

For as strong as Big Billy is, he was always surprisingly gentle with animals. Once the ppg took notice of this, they helped him get work at the local animal shelter. Bubbles would spend a lot of time there with him, initially to help him get settled and make sure things were going smoothly, then she started doing it for fun. His coworkers were intimidated at first, but things mellowed out once they saw he was just there to do his job. Billy sometimes needs instructions simplified, and sometimes he gets distracted by the cats, but he is a hard worker, and genuinely wants to make these animals happy. He cries whenever one is adopted out, but gets over it after being reminded that they have a home and a family now. Currently he is working at an animal shelter the next town over (not Citiesville, but whatever other town is near them) that includes more exotic animals like birds and horses. It was suggested by his manager, as she thinks he has a lot of potential and wants him to vary up his skillset, and he was excited about the idea. If he calls the others, it's to talk about whatever animal he worked with that day. He visits Townsville the most often, since he's close by.

Whenever they all meet up, they spend at least one evening in the city dump, in that same old rickety shack, just like old times.

#giving the boys happy endings for the sake of my mental health 😂#gangreen gang #ace copular #ace ppg #snake ppg #sanford d ingleberry #grubber ppg #arturo de la guerra #william w williams #the gangs all here #prank calls #headcanons #for this AU I'm assuming people are a little more accepting of green skinned weirdos lol #I was worried about this at first but #this was actually kind of fun to work on #though I struggled big time with occupations but I think I did okay #sorry they’re not like APART-apart I just couldn’t do it #they’ve been through so much together they need each other 😭#so I hope this is good enough #also their ages are kind of indeterminate in this one so sorry!#as mentioned in the elderly ask Arturo is the only one I can see maybe being a grandparent #so I gave him an so #the others maybe have somebody at some point?#or at least a few of them #but I really couldn't think of anything I'm sorry ;;#also I based some of this off of my own headcanons

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bogunicorn · 9 months

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I have a Trevelyan OC who doesn't get a ton of "screen time" even in my PSLs. (I do a lot of writing, just most of it is in RP with my wife and will never see the public light of day.) It's because Ramsay is my main Trevelyan's younger brother, and his job in the narrative is to be unjustly killed during the fall of Ostwick Circle so his sister has a Tragic Backstory. But almost all of my Trevelyan siblings have a continuity where they're Inquisitor, and I wrote one up for Ramsay last year just for fun, and he ended up as this kind of cool, anti-authoritarian mage who specializes in fire and rift magic. I imagine him having, like... will anyone know what I mean if I say Wolverine Energy? Gruff, emotionally guarded, has done and is capable of doing very violent things, but also prone to ending up in leadership roles despite being like "ugh, no, I'm not a role model", would function well with a young girl as a morality pet.

Anyway what I've got stuck in my craw right now is the idea of a Trevelyan/Hawke fic with Ramsay and my red/purple blood mage f!Hawke (a classic Spiky Lady Character named Marsali), probably starting around Hawke's introduction in Inquisition and through the end of Here Lies the Abyss. The Warden companion is Carver, and it's this big heartwrenching thing when they're in the Fade and someone has to stay behind.

(Stuck this behind a read more because I just rambled about mirrored narratives wheee)

Marsali and Ramsay are both naturally wary of each other, they're both these guarded sorts of people, slow to trust. But they're such good mirrors of each other, and if you know me, you know I'm a big sucker for mirrored narratives. Marsali is the daughter of an apostate father and a noble mother; Ramsay is the son of a noble father and a common-born mother. They're both very much like their fathers, much to their own dysfunctions, Marsali because they're alike in personality and intensely close to hers, Ramsay because he's the only one of his siblings with a strong physical resemblance to a man who refuses to acknowledge him.

Marsali tries to suppress a natural talent and inclination for blood magic, but actively chose to learn arcane and force magic - schools of magic that focus on buffs, shields, areas of effect that push people away or slow them down - and only employs her more truly violent and aggressive blood magic abilities when she's backed into a corner or loses control. Her father shares her talent for blood magic and kept her from learning to harness it until she was an adult (long, long after she'd developed bad habits and a complete distaste for it, too late to cultivate true control). Ramsay has a natural talent for destructive magic and instead pursued control of it, turning his gift for violent magic into a useful weapon under the mentorship of a similarly inclined father figure in the form of Ostwick's First Enchanter.

Marsali is a mage protective older sister to a non-mage younger brother (who only didn't join the Templars because fate forced him into the Wardens). Ramsay is a mage younger brother to a protective older sister who joined the Templars to look after him in the Circle. Marsali and Carver's relationship is loving, but it has walls up as she's been parentified, and is often quite contentious and full of bickering; despite effectively being his mother figure, Thayet is much more open with Ramsay, especially after escaping the Circle. They rarely fight. For both Marsali and Ramsay, their sibling is the only family they really have, Marsali because hers is all dead, Ramsay because Thayet is the only one who wants to acknowledge he exists.

Marsali consistently shirks and runs from responsibility to anything bigger than herself, only grudgingly taking up the fight against Corypheus because she feels personally responsible for it beginning - and because of the danger to Carver with the false calling. Ramsay grows into authority and takes well to the kind of big picture responsibilities that the Inquisition demands, and he chooses the life and actions of a hero because it instinctively feels like the right thing to do.

And yet, because of their other-side-of-the-coin sorts of differences, I think they would really understand each other. Like they're just the correct amount of distance from one another to have the best view. Marsali sees Ramsay and understands exactly what it takes to be that sort of person, because she tried to be that kind of person and buckled; Ramsay sees Marsali and knows exactly how much love she has for the people around her, because he knows how difficult it is to care for other people in a world that's constantly trying to tear you away from them, up to and including by killing them.

And, of course, because of how similar Marsali and Carver are to Ramsay and his sister... holy shit choosing between them would be torture. Does he let Marsali die protecting her little brother and force Carver to live with a survivor's guilt that Ramsay couldn't stomach himself? Or does he let Carver do what he would do, stay behind and be the protector for once, knowing exactly what that kind of loss would do to Marsali?

I have an idea of what I'd do, but it's still percolating. I think for this fic I'd do an even split in POV specifically to show the depth of their sibling relationships so that bit in the Fade with the Nightmare feels incredibly fraught and tense.

#bog post #my writing #my ocs #dragon age #hawke #the inquisitor #Trevelyan #ramsay trevelyan #marsali hawke #oh i could do a thing with hawke's narrative #where she only uses her first name when carver is around #bc obviously he doesn't call her 'hawke' and that's an extra layer of guard between her and others #only letting carver - not even varric just carver - use her given name #acting as head of the family (what's left of it) by using her surname with everyone else #while ramsay uses his given name for everyone #but his nickname - ram - with his sister and close friends #because ramsay is more community-minded and more open to building found family #and marsali thinks of family as a vulnerable and finite resource to be treated with special caution

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darkfinch · 2 years

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so. I'm less inclined to be charitable to her for obvious and unfair reasons but. quinn's mother. if rabbit felt betrayed by her decision (and if he was initially reassured that she would be training quinn) then they must have been friends in adulthood as well as childhood? what was that like? did they ever work together?

sigh. yeah. quinn’s mom (who has kind of a sophie relationship to names, but is currently going by Alina, so let’s please call her alina for the sake of me not having to write “quinn’s mom” 30 times and Also because reducing her down to just Mother Of Child She Does Not Know is. weird).

she’s a few years older than him, so she was already out of the house and working by the time he started his mentorship with jean-loup, and they only really saw each other for holidays (but it was one of those friendships where you can see them after a year apart and it’s like you hung out yesterday).

usually part of a mentor’s job is to be kind of an In, if they’re good, so they’ll set their kid up with a couple of contacts to make getting into the business a little easier. rabbit, uh, does not get that; alina hears about the jean-loup thing and flies back to babusia’s the next day, like, “so is this a funeral dinner or are we clapping for you” (it’s a “babusia needed something to do with her hands so we’ve got a lot of food now” dinner), and then she offers to let him tag along for a bit.

they settle into a system: rabbit plans, alina fulfills the contract, rabbit sets up across the street with a rifle in case of emergencies, they split the paycheck and anything they steal. neither of them Like Teamwork, but they were trained together, they fight well together, and they trust each other which is fucking RARE, so they keep the partnership going for a couple of years (taking solo jobs in between).

(eventually, rabbit’s established enough that he’s getting good work on his own, and alina’s looking to get more into grifter-y long con type jobs, so they go their separate ways, no hard feelings <3)

when it gets Weird is when alina shows up to christmas dinner in Province, Canada, after six months of radio silence, with the most normal man you’ve ever seen. the most boring possible guy, the guy whose picture shows up when you look up Guy in the dictionary. Bathroom-gender-sign-ass dude.

Also, she’s pregnant, and she’s going to be Normal now, don’t worry about it. please don’t talk about crimes in front of Normal Guy <3

when it gets Weirder is when she 1) distances herself further from the family over the next few years “for a clean break”, and then 2) SUDDENLY ditches the toddler with Normal Man and calls rabbit out of the blue like “hey i’m getting back into the game :3 are you free”. and he’s like, *double checks that he’s not hallucinating* “what the fuck are you talking about”

Anyway, he says yes (he kind of always does), and they do take a couple more jobs together after that, but alina’s more interested in more grift-heavy jobs, more blackmailing and homicidal dinner parties etc, and rabbit’s more interested in Shoot Guy From Distance, so it doesn’t really work out. she still visits babusia to say hi, she still mentors a couple of kids, they all still kind of act like Normal Baby never happened—

—and then quinn shows up. and suddenly Normal Baby is an actual physical child who, it turns out, was NOT okay with Normal Man living an idyllic suburban lifestyle. and rabbit knows what alina’s like, she is how she is, he sighs about it but accepts that she just…isn’t particularly Concerned about other people’s feelings, and that’s fine—except now rabbit’s watching this kid watch alina, when she visits, and watching him get Nothing from her, and he’s like. ohhhhhh that’s a problem

(quinn’s thirteen and poking at their campfire with a stick, a little dejectedly, because baba showed him some photos of baby rabbit + alina, and he’s like, do you just like me ‘cause you knew my mom, like he’s thinking maybe rabbit’s just looking at him and seeing her, like his dad did, maybe

and rabbit drags quinn’s chair back a safer distance from the fire, and adds another log, like, I like you ‘cause you’re you, and if i’m honest i like her a little less now that i know...you…… where’s—did—look at me, did you seriously eat half a bag of marshmallows? …don't laugh, I was gone for like Five Minutes, sunny, what the Fuck—)

the mentorship thing’s a betrayal because there are exactly two people on earth rabbit can go to when he’s having a crisis about something. Alina, who is Historically Speaking one of them, watches him try to breathe around what if someone’s fucking awful to him, what if they do a shit job, what if they get him killed, and very hesitantly goes, “well. I could maybe do it, if it comes to that. I mean i’d have to think about it, but you have a year left, don’t worry about that yet”

And babusia talks to her about it too, and reassures rabbit, and so when the Time Comes rabbit’s like. well, of course she will. right. of course she will, even if it makes her uncomfortable, even if it’s awkward. this one person he loves is of course going to do the right thing for this other person he loves, of Course.

and then she doesn’t, and he doesn’t speak more than two words to her for the next three years

#quinn's mom has a childhood name a Being Quinn's Mom name and a work name. alina's the work name it's just easier #she also has problems!! they all have problems they're just playing hot potato with the mental crisis they're taking turns #finchlore #finchtalks #this is too many words but i rewrote it twice and could not make it shorter?? perplexed?? apologies

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nokingsonlyfooles · 11 months

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And, ART! I've been doing art! How 'bout Sanaam's tarot card?

This is an illustration for Tin Soldier # 11, The Sailor is Home from the Sea. I'm stressed and distracted, so I may be a little light on the description here, but it's been through some changes!

Here's the original, and I don't have a crummy pen-paper-scan version of this one.

What I wanted to do was kinda complicated and it's hard to find reference images of fat guys. At least I can search for "plus size woman" and get various clothing catalogue images. "Big and tall" the male equivalent, tends to cough up "muscular and tall." And the public domain has a real lack of diversity, which some folks are working hard to remedy. My S/O posed for this in MY long coat to help me out!

Anyways, the one on the top there is all public domain, and the shaded version is... mostly public domain, but I think the suitcase is a paid stock image. I'm licensing with Creative Commons, BY-NC-SA, so you can use/share this stuff if you're so inclined.

Sanaam is #9, and #s 7 & 8 are his wife and daughter. I like when it works out like that. He's based on The Hermit, you can see he has a light, and a boat, just with slightly different significance. He's standing at a bus stop, which seems to be literally on the beach, and waiting to go home, but looking over his shoulder at the boat and the sea. He wishes he could be in two places at once, you see.

Fire and water represent two types of loss, and he has both - the sun and the sea. Water is for passive loss, and fire is the more active kind. He misses a lot when he's not home, but he does choose to leave, over and over again.

Sanaam is my automated summary function. Every time he comes home, he needs an update about what he missed. He's also standing in for my own dad, who wasn't home a lot. I do not feel super great about having produced yet another absent Black father, but the social pressures that cause these things are ubiquitous, even in an alternate, fictional universe. He's doing his best! So am I!

Maggie and the General are making a cameo appearance in bird form, in the background, and Sanaam has a fleur de lis on his luggage - which also appears on his wife and daughter's cards. I'm using it for their family and to symbolize loyalty. In his case, he is definitely loyal to his family - but he has family in a lot of places. Also, it's difficult to take care of a family without a job, ya know? Still, I decided the fleur ought to go in the top section, with San Rosille, where Maggie and the General live, not in the middle with the stamp from the company he works for, or at the bottom with the island where he came from. Milo made him a compass that always points "HOME," and that seems to be defined by wherever his wife and daughter happen to be.

I like the more Sgt. Peppery version of the coat in the less-detailed shadow format. I think it looks more like a captain! Maybe a bit like Captain Crunch, but the guy isn't working for the military anymore. It's like Scoops Ahoy in Stranger Things puts its workers in silly costumes too. Sanaam is not an unsilly person, and it's a perfectly functional coat, so I doubt he minds.

#tarot cards #illustrations #tin soldier and soldier on #art

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notabled-noodle · 2 years

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idk if i'm wording this right but it's kind of hard to tell what support level you are if you have multiple conditions and it doesn't seem super concrete which one someone can be.

there are definitely things i'd be considered low support needs for (speaking with mouth in full sentences mostly fine, using tone of voice and facial expressions when it helps get the point across, academically inclined, earlier development in reading/speaking, able to live alone), and that needs to be acknowledged, but there are more things that would place me as mid support (can barely understand speech, taking things literally/figure of speech issues, extremely low tolerance for sensory info and change, if anything goes wrong loses speech completely without warning, unable to be left alone in public, no eye contact or even looking in the person's general direction, absolutely awful fine motor development, constantly stimming in ways that make it obvious that i'm autistic, unable to mask, can't get a job, executive dysfunction, etc).

i think a part of this is the other stuff i have (me/cfs, adhd, mental illness), but either way it demonstrates to me that none of these are super concrete anyway. i can't really say i'm mid support because i'm mostly speaking (85% of the time now i live alone), my growing up/diagnosis experience was exactly that of lower support people, and a lot of my lower support traits are the ones people base support levels off. but i don't really relate to low support people as much either because the things they describe for their daily life are so different to me and i can't really relate because my support needs aren't low enough to count.

i guess what i'm trying to say is that when discussing support needs we need to consider the whole person? and that not everyone fits neatly into 3 boxes any more than they fit into 2.

– someone who's been called 'low support' this entire time by the people who actively do the mid tier supporting

PS sorry this is so long and also sorry if i sound like i'm whining or showing my low support ignorance or something /gen

yeah, I get what you mean. I’ll probably have higher support needs as I age, and as my chronic illnesses become harder to manage. not just because of my chronic illness, but because I also find my autism harder to manage when my body is in pain. trauma plays a huge part in my support needs as well.

things are a lot more complicated than people think. the support needs labels don’t work for absolutely everyone, and there are definitely people who fall between the cracks. there are many people who don’t get the support they need, because even some people who work with autism don’t fully understand the range of support needs a person may have.

it also should be acknowledged that “mid support needs” is a huge category. it covers people who can do “complex” tasks, but none of the “basic” ones, but it also covers people who need a medium amount of support with all kinds of tasks. those two experiences are very different from each other, and those people will have very different perspectives to each other.

the other thing is that support needs can and will change over a person’s lifetime. extreme cases of autistic burnout can irreversibly increase a person’s support needs, making them go from low support to mid-high support. those are experiences that matter too.

I guess the TLDR is that people do need to remember that the autistic community is diverse, and has a diverse range of needs and experiences

#asks #autism

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cr0bat · 7 months

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It's kind of silly, but I'd like to retreat back to tumblr.

I have been doing the full-time school, full-time job, full-time pregnant lady with two kids already thing for over a month now, and so I have been kind of stuck with my thoughts for a while.

This isn't to say I have any regrets. I know that a year from now, I will be thankful for the current grueling nature of what I'm going through presently.

A year from now, I'll only have a half year of school left. I'll have a 9 month old,(it gets much easier at 9 months.) a 2.5 year old and a 4.5 year old. I'll be almost 30. And hopefully, I'll have a few of my other short-term goals realized: a bigger garden, and the tenacity to have kept up with it all and be used to juggling it all.

That being said, there are things I think I need to change to get there. The current dialogue about "reasons why teachers are quitting and students are failing" is emphasizing the lacking in current parenting. People are pointing out that children are not being spoken to, that parents are too distracted as a result of the increased demand since the cost of living is a bit too much. As I think about this, I find myself not disagreeing with anything being pointed out.

In addition - I also watched a TikTok today about a mom reflecting upon her "annoyed" tone with her 4 year old in comparison to her 2 year old... and I can guiltily relate.

That being said, here are some changes I'd like to implement in between now and that not-so-distant future:

Less screen time. Exhaustion is not an excuse. This is mainly for me, but for kids, too. We already do a good job of not letting our kids on screens outside of downtime at home after school. And I already read books before bed, but I'd like to do more hands-on activities in our downtime nonetheless.

More outside time. I have felt so much joy from the little garden I grew this year. Getting a fence around the yard was also an upgrade that helped playtime become much safer and easier since we live on such a busy road. Not to mention, I'd like to be able to let the dog get fresh air more often.

Journaling. For real. I love it. Even the little madness I type here. It's something. It makes me feel less inclined to talk someone's ear off. Even if I only type it, and don't necessarily use my pen - though I do love using my pen - it would help me mentally.

Eating more greens and drink more water. I am craving veggies so bad. And I don't think it's the pregnancy, I think it's just me. This goes hand in hand with having a garden. The water one is self-explanatory.

Going through what I have instead of acquiring more. Sorting pictures, actually using art supplies, cleaning my areas and putting decorations on the walls. Reading books instead of buying them. Photo albums are a must now that I'm taking pictures of my kids faster than I can manage.

Investing in meaningful friendships. This is the topic that has made my brain whir the most recently. I'm realizing that I'm allowing people in my life to take up very complacent roles as friends when I have so many people who reach out and I don't give them the chance to be in my life. No more people who don't value what I do. My family and job are important. I am constantly pursuing growth. People who can't relate... I have a hard time with them, and I shouldn't try to get them to see the world the way I do. I should let them remain stagnant in their own. And not lose sleep over it. People who allow for me to be inconvenienced and put down, people who benefit at my expense... I don't really wish to be around that anymore. And I need to play an active role in removing those influences from my life.

Anyway, all this to say, I am hoping to have a productive Saturn Return. It started with me dying my hair red and returning to school, becoming pregnant and having a realization about the relationships in my life that do not serve me and my family. I hope we can continue to grow and I can become a better parent, a better person to those around me and better human overall.

I hope I can convince myself I have more to offer the world than just my time and effort, and I hope I can someday feel that I am deserving of the blessings I have gained along the way, that I have earned such a wholesome and loving partner and that the air I breathe is not wasted.

Hello again, tumblr.

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stardustincarnate · 3 years

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YOU SHINE LIKE THE STARS, YOU LIGHT UP MY HEART // Touta Matsuda x Reader

word count : 2585 genre : fluff <33 (stargazing with this pretty boy!!)

It was a sight to behold—the empty of clouds but shrouded with twinkling stars with the right distance from one another. They were visible in every direction. What a perfect night to stargaze. You had just gotten out the yard of your family's house, accompanied by a cup of hot milk and cookies. Unfortunately you forgot to bring your eyeglasses so you had to head back inside—a surprise welcoming you when you saw someone who didn't belong in your house.

"Touta? What are you doing here?"

That was a little... impertinent. You felt guilty. It wasn't like you weren't happy to see him, you were just shocked. Plain shocked.

"Hey [Y/N]! Haha, good evening!"

He was a bit skittish, maybe nervous. You noticed how clammy his forehead was, with the reason being just finished looking at you through the loophole in the kitchen wall. "It's been a while. You look.. dazzling.. as always."

"If your definition of dazzling is someone who looks like a zombie who's just gotten out of bed, thank you." You smirked, wearing your glasses. "What made you come here anyway? Isn't it late? It's your day-off today?"

"Yup. Thought of visiting a.. friend. You see, I—I really missed you! Work hasn't been the same since you le—"

"Hm, I know that tone. Come on Matsu."

"Hey! It's not that I'm complaining! I still like my job, it's good. But it could be better if you're with us, despite your never-ending bad mood. Hehe..."

"Ooh, so you missed me, that's why you're here. You wanna catch up."

"Of course?" He sheepishly rubbed his nape. You smiled slyly and hummed, trotting back to the yard.

"Come. You're obliged to."

Matsuda followed, hesitant to sit beside you on the grass, only until you pat the space beside you. He kept on constantly shifting his legs as you munched on your cookies, offering him some. You two ate in silence, looking at nothing in particular as the night breeze hit you. The wind's eerily ethereal howl rung in your ears, blending with the faint sound of the television from inside.

He pursed his lips and looked at you, blushing while waiting for the right time to speak. You thought the same thing even without looking at him. After some time, you spoke, immediately cutting yourself off as he did the same. Of course, that's bound to happen.

"You go first."

"You're my visitor. I know you wanna ask me some things."

He fidgeted the hem of his shirt. "How.. How have you been?" You snorted, shaking your head fondly. "I'm fine, I guess. Nothing interesting though, really. No thrill in my new work plus my bitchy subordinates. I swear, Matsu, if I get full, they'll know I'm the worst of their kind."

"Show them who's boss [Y/N]! You do look scary and mean after all.. I mean—"

"Hey! I'm not as mean as I look like! I only am to Satan's spawns."

"I-I was kidding—"

"Chillax, of course."

"But at least you are actually kind and can cope with me."

"And your stupidity." You jested. He flushed pink and frantically shook his head.

"What's your new work anyway? Am I the only one among your peers who doesn't it yet?"

"Nah, they've no idea too. I'm currently working as a hotelier. But I think I'm... Is old-work-sick even a thing? Something like that."

"What hotel?"

"Not too far from the station. You just gotta grab a taxi and voila—you're there. Hm, why ask? Thought of visiting me frequently? Eh? Eh?"

"N-No! I mean.. why not? Just thought of.. visiting you during my free time, just to, you know, chatter with you. Because—because you boost my mood.. in some sort of way."

You felt your heart melt. "Aww, I'm happy. You do the same to me. And you know? I've thought of visiting you in the station as well."

"Really? You should! I—I mean.. only if you're free of course. I've been feeling out of place lately. They're still nice but I don't know. Maybe it's just me..."

"They're preoccupied with work, that's why they barely interact with you. Focus on your work, it'll make you less lonely." You said, plaintive.

"But I am focusing.."

"No, hocus focus! Not focus focus. You know what I mean?"

"That's vague, but okay?"

"And yeah, if I visit you, it won't be very frequent. I'm sorry Matsu, even if I want to. I don't want to get scolded by the inspector or the chief. I don't wanna get you in more trouble too. Even though I'd often, er, miss you, too."

The words came out, unbidden, and you mentally smacked your forehead. His eyes softened as you stared at him. He smiled, and you could tell that he was still restraining himself because even his eyes were smiling, his ears turning red. You found his smile cute and rather infectious. You cleared your throat. He averted his gaze elsewhere, mumbling.

"Why did you have to quit.. I wish you had stayed."

You sighed then pursed your lips. "Me too. But my parents don't like it anymore. Well to begin with, they never liked the idea of their only daughter being involved in a perilous job. But the arson was what really ended it all."

Matsuda looked crestfallen after you'd mentioned it. He clenched his fists. He could still remember that day vividly—the day you almost died. He remembered how he struggled to not look at the criminal because he was afraid he might start thinking of doing unjust things to the person who almost killed you. He sighed.

"I should've stayed with you. That would've never happened."

"No no, chin up Matsuu! The fire didn't even fully touch me 'cause even it was intimidated of how hot I am compared to it." You chuckled, casting him a wistful glance. "I was reckless. My bad. And that recklessness led to that. So take it from me. Think thoroughly before you act. I wouldn't want the same thing happening to you, you reckless bean."

"Noted Madame!" He laughed.

You smiled and looked up the sky, tapping his shoulder moments later.

"Yes, [Y/N]?"

"You stargaze often?"

"Not really. I can't remember the last time I did. Do you like stargazing?"

"Needless to say. I often do it. You should, too." You nudged his shoulder with yours, your proximity making you blush. You both threw your heads back and stared at the stars in silence. You began making random patterns. Matsuda giggled as he found one that looked like the initial of your name.. or as he had tried to convince himself.

"This peacefulness, it's my dolce vita! Nothing but the question of how many stars we could count. I can do this for hooours."

"Your neck will turn numb.. Mine's already feeling a little.. eh."

"There's no need to worry when we can just lie down."

You could see the redness of his cheeks after hearing that. You could almost giggle.

The two of you lay down on the grass, him spacing out a little. His shoulders were tense, his heart banging his sternum that he was afraid you'd hear just how loud it was. But eventually he relaxed when he saw you not minding the proximity at all.

Matsuda looked up, his smile growing larger and larger the more stars his eyes caught. But he had completely forgotten the counting-star-thing you said.

The night was silently still. Television from the inside had been turned off so the only noise you heard even from the distance was the sound of nature. You controlled your breath, afraid that it might disrupt the stillness. You began to grow lethargic from all the star counting. Alas, you gave up and stopped at number 42.

You looked to the side to see what progress had he made. None at all. He was not only staring at you—he was smiling! Looking at you like you are his world!

Once he realized you were also staring at him his face turned beet red. He wanted to look away, but how? There were you, exchanging stares of adoration. Hah. All that was needed was a label.

You had the strongest urge to lean in and kiss him. Kiss him? Oh [Y/N], control your thoughts! Sigh. If nothing would miraculously interrupt the stare session, you'd really kiss him.

Nothing. Nothing. The universe was in favor of you. And you know the drill.

You took the opportunity to face him and lift yourself up from the grass. Your stare could've frozen him on his position. He was going to explode in mushiness. It's almost like the wind was all it would take for your lips to press.

You rested your elbow on the grass and gently caressed his hair. You cupped his cheek with your other hand, your thumb circling it. You closed your eyes, praying you wouldn't fail this one. You did it slowly on purpose, but seemed like Matsuda opposed that. He inclined and cupped your face, kissing you.

But only for a mere second.

Your torso clumsily fell flat partially on him and the ground because of your initial awkward position. And you didn't even feel the kiss because of your forgotten eyeglasses.

"Aha...haha... Uhm—[Y/N]—you okay?? I'm—"

You sat up and boldly chuckled in spite of looking like a four-eyed tomato.

"That went veeeeery well."

"So.. ah.. the thing earlier.. moments ago—" It's as if he was trying to convince himself that it really happened. And he couldn't contain his infectious smile and laughter anymore that you were sure reached the entire neighborhood.

"What waaas that!"

You laid your glasses aside and tossed yourself at him. He fell on his back with you on his top, your legs in a tangled mess. As he wrapped his arms around your waist, he wheezed.

"I hope you're not dumb at this stuff because I hopelessly am."

"Whaddaya meaann?" You were certain he was teasing you. You clicked your tongue.

"....Silly! We're a couple now!"

"HAHAH—wait—you're not joking?? Are you?? No??"

"Do I look like I am?"

"Hah-hah, as in, you're serious-serious? [Y/N]??"

"Do I look like I'm not? Idiot of course I am! You want me to take it back?"

"Nonononono—" you tried your hardest not to cackle, "—I mean of course I do, but—ah! Stupid mouth! Uhm—well—if that's the case then why should I decline when I really like you for—for a long time now!"

"I'm going to pretend to be shocked. But I—I like you too.. I was just waiting for, uhm, you, to, uhm, confess to me, but that sounds so unlikely.. So, thank you for staring?"

He stared at you eagerly.

"Darn it, that wasn't cool! Nonono—you know what I mean, don't you...? You stared at me, and I wanted to kiss you, and then we're here.. And and—"

"I love you!"

Matsuda hugged you tighter as you became stiff and red with what he just uttered. It's either you move and explode or you don't, so you didn't.

I love you ...

He loves you. And he means it.

You squeezed your eyes shut and bit your lower lip, though unable to restrain a smile.

You cleared your throat.

"M-Matsu... Do you want to stay the night here?"

"Oh, no! Actually.. I should be heading home by now. I've got work to do tomorrow morning."

"Awh bummer I forgot.. Well, let me assist you back there."

"Thank you. I'll.. I'll visit you more often, I promise! Ah—ahem! It's one of my duties now that I'm your boyfriend.." He rubbed his nape, shy in proclaiming. You blushed.

"Hey, but you can't just disappear from your work otherwise the chief will beat your ass. Besides, you're a baby! Can't have a baby constantly slacking off his work, can we?"

"Hey! I am a tough police officer! I'm far from being a baby like you!"

"Ohohoho look who's whining like one!"

"I—If you keep saying that I really won't visit you!"

"Fine with me. I'll just find others to hang out with."

His sulky pout fueled your eruption of cackling. You put your head on his shoulder and wrapped your arms around his waist from the side.

"I'm only kidding! Of course I only have my eyes set on you!"

"That better be true.. or I will arrest that man trying to steal my girl." He squished your cheeks. "Oh, and that reminds me—I have something to say to you.."

"I bet on my life it's gonna be one of those pickup lines.."

"No no this is a good one, promise! Ehem. Are you a cr—"

"DON'T! I just know what you're going to say! No no no!"

"I haven't even s—"

"I heard that pickup line way to many times already! Don't you dare!"

Matsuda sighed. "At least I tried.. I just wanted to make you smile.."

You shifted behind him, back-hugging him and patting his tummy as you rested your chin on his shoulder.

"There is no need for that when just seeing you can already make me smile.."

Matsuda grinned, placing his hands above yours.

"I didn't know [Y/N] was so cheesy."

"H-Hey! At least it's not as bad as that 'are you a criminal cause you stole my heart' thingy you were going to say!" You protested. He laughed loudly as a response. "Psh. Time to go home now, officer."

"Uh...?" He looked back at you and your position.

"Go go go."

Still confused, he started walking through the backdoor, with you never letting him go. It was not an ideal position, and when he passed by your parents in the living room to bid them goodbye, they only snorted, unable to believe your clinginess.

Once you two were near the front door, you let go of him.

"Goodnight Touta. Please be safe on your way home. Text me as soon as you get home, okay?"

He opened the door, nodding. "Don't worry [Y/N], I will. Although.. I might be safer if you give me a lucky charm."

"What lucky charm?"

He pointed his cheeks. "...Here, please?"

"Aw I thought you'd never ask!" You leaned closer to peck his right cheek. But instead of his cheek, it was his lips that you kissed. Matsuda had turned his face a millisecond just before your lips could press his cheek. You couldn't help but smile in the kiss. He was, too. Eventually you two pulled away, with triumph written all over his face.

"Touta.. You.."

"Ahaha... Is that the time? Oh, byebye [Y/N]! Thank you for the lucky charm. Goodnight, dream a little dream of me!"

He kissed your cheek before leaving your house, looking back every now and then as he walked away, and still waving goodbye to you. You smiled and shamelessly threw flying kisses at him.

You closed the door once he was out of sight, leaning your back against it dreamily. You thought, that night couldn't get any better. You glanced to the right, your parents whose eyeballs looked like it would come out of its sockets greeting you. You laughed and shook your head before they could say anything, and then headed to your room.

And maybe you did dream a little dream of him that night...

#death note #death note x reader #touta matsuda #touta matsuda x reader #death note imagines #death note fluff #death note matsuda #matsuda x reader #death note x you #death note x y/n

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you-can-be-what-you-want-to-be · 2 years

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okay but re the WIPs with asks there is a part of me that wants to be The Worst and I'm morbidly curious about both "Kink 😔 but with world building" and "ABO worldbuilding ONLY addition" but also "Wine tma somewhere else" sounds great

Ok so this is mortifying and you are evil but I’m going to share anyway thanks 😭

Kink but with worldbuilding is kink based on several fics where Jon is the institutes free use as a job and I wanted to look at like the morality of that and how you get there and pov on it and also I think Martin would be very into it and also be very catholic about being into it

“You know I’m ace, and I love you, but you aren’t attractive to me, no one is. I can’t do that kind of thing without wondering if I’m doing it right. But if I’m just used by a bunch of anonymous people who make all the decisions, then I don’t have to be anxious. It’s not something I could do wrong if I wanted because it’s something that’s happening to me, not the other way around. I don’t nessicarily enjoy it the same way as you, but it does feel nice and get rid of the stress, and I think it would be helpful especially with you.”

ABO but worldbuilding is honestly less ABO and more sub/dom but I wanted to look into how that would shape culture and relationships and how to make being biologically drawn to something moral

“That… makes sense,” Sasha says hesitantly “but isn’t that impaired consent? Like, if you consent while drugged, that doesn’t count, isn’t that the same?”

“No,” Jon says patiently “because he is also impaired, just in a different way, and it’s not impairment it’s just… biology. Like, we’re all ace, right? So in this metaphor, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, I’m allo. Me and Martin are drawn to taking and giving control. You don’t call allo people impaired for being attracted to others, they’re just naturally more inclined to do something than aces are.”

Wine is literally just a shit post for TMA. If you’ve ever listened to the podcast the thrilling adventure hour with their beyond belief segments it’s about these two ridiculously drunk and rich mediums for supernatural did just keep kind of accidentally stumbling into it while all they really want to do is make out and get more drunk like they face a sucubus and just call dibs and I think jmart deserves to be drunk and silly

“My love for big spiders would cancel our Jon’s fear of them-“

“That’s really not how this works-“

“So that’s really all our fears off the list, sorry. Oh, unless you turned into a worm I guess, nasty buggers.”

The monster turns into a giant tremors-esque worm as Jon and Martin look on unimpressed.

“We’re really only scared of the tiny worms that can burrow,” Jon says, gesturing to the size of the scars on his face.

“Oh no! Jon, a worm!” Martin exclaims as the monster shrinks.

“I’ll get it dear,” Jon says as he takes off his shoe to squash it.

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