#but you get the idea

[echo-goes-mmm]

Juno (Oneshot)

Masterpost

Warnings: lightly BBU adjacent 

“And that’s about it,” finished Jack, leading the new volunteer back to the front desk. “Any questions?”

Daniel shrugged. “It seems simple enough. Feed the pets, give out meds, play time is two hours a day,” he rattled off.

Jack smiled. “Just about, yeah. Although some pets have dietary restrictions, so be careful with that. It’s all in their charts.”

“Right. Oh, do employees get to adopt from the shelter? Just curious.”

“Yup! There’s a waiting period of six months, though. In fact, I'll have officially adopted a kitty tomorrow. I’m really excited.” Jack beamed, proud.

“Kitty?”

“Oh,” waved off Jack, “it’s a term we use to describe personalities. ‘Kitties’ are shyer, quiet, more independent. ‘Pups’ are more energetic, playful, outgoing. You know the type.”

“Makes sense,” said Daniel. “I guess I’m more of a dog person, but, like, real dogs.”

“Fair,” nodded Jack. “Most people don’t want human pets, hence their rarity. I think there’s only one store in the county, and we’re the only shelter. Hey, since we have a couple hours, you want to meet my kitty?”

Jack pulled out a set of keys from the front desk drawer. “I’m thinking of calling him Juno. He’s really great, and I already love him.”

“Sure, why not?”

The two men turned back down the hall, passed the ‘employee only’ doors. 

“So how come Juno didn’t get adopted yet? I hear pets get adopted really quickly here.”

“Well… he’s got some medical stuff a lot of people don’t want to deal with.”

“Like what?”

Jack swung the keys around his finger.

“For one thing, he’s trans.”

Daniel shot him a look. 

“I know, I know,” Jack said, “but the reality is, that turns a lot of people off, in a manner of speaking. I don’t think it should matter, but it does. And although lots of pets like having sex, Juno has a severe aversion to anyone or anything near his vulva that isn’t himself and his menstrual cup.”

They reached another door at the end of the hall, and Jack flipped through the keys trying to find the right one.

“Usually that isn’t an issue; most people don’t care. Unfortunately, Juno also has an expensive diet. It’s either buy the pricey pet food, or cook for him. I don’t mind the cooking- I like cooking- but the combination of everything makes him pretty unlucky in the adoption department.”

Jack fit a key into the lock of a second door, which opened into a smaller hall with fewer stalls. 

An acidic smell hit them as soon as the door opened.

“Shit,” muttered Jack.

“That can’t be good,” agreed Daniel.

Jack jogged through the hall, and came to stop at a stall. A whine sounded from the poor pet inside.

“Hey, buddy,” cooed Jack, crouching down.

Daniel peered over his shoulder.

A pet was curled up in a far corner, stale vomit in a puddle on the opposite side. 

The pet had dark brown hair, and his eyes were screwed shut. He looked feverish, and he was trembling. His breathing was quick and shallow, and he had top surgery scars on his chest.

Daniel glanced at the sign on the wall.

Juno, it read. Owner: Pending.

“Did somebody give you the wrong food, honey?” Jack asked quietly as he unlocked the stall.

Juno whined again.

“Okay buddy, don’t worry.” Jack pulled out his phone and snapped a picture of the stall, pet and vomit and all. “I’ll take good care of you, I promise.”

Jack approached the shivering pet. “Take a look in his food bowl, would you?” he called over his shoulder.

Daniel looked inside. “It’s halfway empty.”

“Fuck,” muttered Jack. The pet whimpered. “Not you, sweetheart. You’re doing so good; making sure you didn’t get messy. There’s a good boy. You didn’t eat it all cause you figured it out, yeah? Such a smart kitty.” Jack pet the boy’s hair, and Juno leaned into his hand.

“Can you sit up for me?”

Jack helped the pet lean against the wall, his face tacky with tear tracks. “I know your tummy hurts, sweetheart, but just stay right there, okay?”

Jack pulled away and turned to Daniel. “Dump out the food in the trash,” he ordered. “Get a new bowl from storage, and fill it with the gluten-free bag. Make sure it’s a new bowl, or he’ll get sick again.”

“What about the water? Won’t that be contaminated?”

“Go ahead and take that to the sink. I’ll take care of getting him some liquid,” Jack said. “I need to brush his teeth anyway.”

They left the stall. “Not going to lock it?”

“He’s not going anywhere,” Jack said with a grim face. “He can’t move much when he has a reaction.”

Jack pulled out his phone, dialing a number as he went to the med cabinet.

He opened the cabinet, looking for the stock paste he kept on hand and the shelter-supplied disposable toothbrushes as the phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Hey boss, it’s Jack. One of the pets got fed an allergen again. Sent you some photos.”

“Dammit. Which one?”

Jack found the brushes. They were on the wrong shelf.

“Guess.”

His boss sighed. “And you’re sure it’s Ethan doing it?”

Jack switched his phone to the other shoulder as he filled a bottle with hot water.

“He hates me,” he complained, scooping a tablespoon of the stock paste into the bottle. “And he really wanted Juno. He was on food duty earlier. He’s trying to sabotage the adoption. You know, make him sick so he has to do a round of isolation.”

His boss sighed. “I’ll check the tapes.”

“Thanks. See you tomorrow.”

Jack shook the bottle until it was a dark brown and the paste had dissolved.

“Hey, Juno,” he said quietly, pulling open the door. “I’m back.”

Juno looked up at him with teary blue eyes. Poor thing.

“I got you a toothbrush, and that soup you like.” Jack set the bottle off the side, kneeling in front of him.

Juno opened his mouth, still weak and miserable, and Jack scrubbed the stomach acid off his teeth.

“You get to come home with me tomorrow,” he said, cupping the back of Juno’s head for support. “Won’t that be nice?”

Juno made an ‘mhm’ as soon as Jack was finished. 

Jack picked up the bottle. “Do you think you can hold it for me?”

Juno didn’t look very sure.

“Alright, that’s fine.” Jack unscrewed the cap, and held the soup to Juno’s mouth.

Juno took a couple of sips, and turned his head away. His stomach probably couldn’t handle much more.

“That’s okay. You're doing great.” He brushed Juno’s sweaty bangs away from his forehead. He wanted to give him a bath, get all that sweat off, but Juno probably wouldn’t appreciate that right now. “You wanna go to sleep?” 

The pet nodded, clearly exhausted. He must have been vomiting for hours.

Jack helped him lay down on his cot as Daniel came back.

“What's that?” he nodded towards the bottle.

“Stock,” Jack explained. “The salt and fluid is good for nausea and he needs the calories.”

Jack stroked Juno’s hair.

“He’ll be okay, right?”

“Yeah. He just needs to rest.”

___________________

Jack stirred the fried rice in the pan. It smelled great, and it was a new recipe. His aunt had recommended it, and she had Celiac disease just like Juno. 

Honestly, it wasn’t that hard to switch everything over to be gluten free. And it was worth it to keep his pet healthy.

Juno pressed himself against Jack’s back, his arms wrapping around Jack’s waist. He laid his head on Jack’s shoulder.

“Hey, bud. Ready to eat?”

“Mhm.”

Jack spooned two portions into bowls, and sat on the couch to eat.

Juno ate from his bowl with gusto, and Jack smiled as he watched. His kitty had put on a lot more weight, and the doctor was really pleased with his progress. 

Juno finished before he did, and got up onto the couch, shoving his head onto Jack’s lap.

Jack absent-mindedly carded a hand through his hair. It was so soft and wavy now that he had proper conditioner. 

He focused on the nape of Juno’s neck, just where he liked it, and Juno nuzzled into his thigh.

If Juno could purr like real cats, Jack knew he would.

He looked so much better: well-rested, well-fed, and with a handsome leather collar.

Adopting him was the best decision Jack had ever made.

taglist: @paintedpigeon1

#in which I am juno #yeah this is a self insert fuck you <3 #pet whump #whump #my writing #allergy whump #not really cause celiac is an auto immune disorder #but you get the idea

[underwhelmingalchemist]

*mom voice* You can get these words back when you know what they mean

#i know narcissism is a personality disorder #and that gaslighting is a therapy term #but you get the idea #npd #mental health #mental illness #intrusive thoughts

[puhpandas]

hi. beckory and fronnie parallel

#i think tony would look up to bonnie and ask him for guidance if they were able to have a relationship #not fatherly or familial like gregory and freddy but just. idk #mentor doesn’t sound right #but you get the idea #and i think he’d keep asking about fronnie and bonnie just knows exactly why tony notices them #because he sees himself with gregory in them #drawing tag #beckory #gregory #tony #freddy #bonnie #tony and bonnie #goddd gregory’s side profile is hard to get right #gregtony #this is like a scenario where gregory has his bond with freddy and it’s post everything btw #don’t know how bonnie would be back and this would work #like i guess ruin wouldn’t happen and the pizzaplex would just be okay #and bonnie would be back #whatever lol

[solciego]

ONE PIECE SEASON 1 | VILLAINS

#one piece live action #one piece #one piece netflix #one piece villains #one piece screencaps #season one villains #there are a few minor one im missing #but you get the idea #tv show #*my edit #buggy the clown #dracule mihawk #arlong #alvida #kuro one piece #one piece la #my edit: opla

[celluloidbroomcloset]

Exceptional emotive work by Rhys Darby. You can see the emotions shift. The excitement (and the fun, because Stede does like doing this) of the escape moving towards the memory of where he is and where Ed is and what he needs to do. The tears in his eyes that he doesn't let go on deck but holds until he's next to Ed's body. The break in his expression when Izzy tries to thank him, that little surge of anger as he turns to go below deck. It's a single, fairly static shot, which means that it all depends on the emotions on his face.

Something this show does exceptionally well is managing that shift between comedy and more serious emotions - yes, Stede is a silly little guy, and he's also a guy with a deep well of love and pain and hope. He will make an ass of himself by belly-flopping into the ocean and he will save his crew because he loves them and he will hold his emotions in check until he can sit by Ed and grieve alone. There's a great fluidity to his characterization - he's the guy who came up with a fake death scenario involving a fight with a leopard and a piano, and the guy who wrote a thousand love letters and threw them into the sea, and the guy who will shove Blackbeard up against the wall for the purposes of hot gay sex*.

All of that works because the show doesn't treat him as an object of derision or like he has to prove anything or change himself to be loved or treated right. He changes, but he changes organically and neither in the writing nor in Darby's performance does he lose his earnestness and his whimsy and his silliness. In fact, the show clearly indicates that that's what endears him to the crew and why Ed fell in love with him in the first place. But he does feel, and he feels deeply.

It's a very hard needle to thread, both in terms of writing and in terms of directing and performance, but dang they pull it off.

*Not my phrase, but it looks like the original poster may have removed the post?

#ofmd #our flag means death #stede bonnet #rhys darby #gif #ofmd season 2 #apologies for my gifmaking skills they are not quite there yet #and the video version i have of this is quite dark #but you get the idea #there are not a lot of actors who can hit this mix just right #and not a lot of writers and directors who can make it work onscreen #as someone who only knew darby from flight of the conchords and his voicework on bob's burgers #this whole show was really a revelation #dude can act

[vampireghostsart]

daan discord kitten au .

shoutout to the irl discord friends who were subjected to this first.

#ignore that this is ugly please #i just wanted to get the joke done and posted #i know it's rough #but you get the idea #fear and hunger #fear and hunger 2: termina #faht #fear and hunger termina #f&h #daan #fear and hunger daan #fnh #funger #karin sauer

[st4rfckerz]

thinking thoughts about like. intercrural sex with sam bc youre too pure and just a fucking cocktease you just can’t have… sex yet… so he makes do with the closest thing he can get

oh my god it would drive him absolutely insane.

making out with sam was always your favorite thing to do. it was sam's favorite thing too, but he always wished you'd let him go further.

it made him feel a little selfish and greedy, but he can't help it when your needy hips accidentally roll against his growing bulge so deliciously.

"don't do that." he demands. you look at him, confusion plastered across your face.

"do what?" sam gives you a knowing look. when you finally realize what you did, you drop your head down, feeling a tinge of guilt. you didn't mean to tease sam, but it just felt so good.

"just- take these off." sam gently tugs at your shorts. you lift yourself off his lap and remove them. he leans back on his bed and takes off his baggy, grey sweatpants. you sit back on his lap and look at him, waiting for his next response.

"can i touch you here?" sam asks sweetly as his thumb gently brushes against your clothed clit. after you grant him permission, he reaches underneath your panties and grazes a single finger between your wet folds.

"shit you're soaking," he chuckles. "here, you wanna help me too?" you nod eagerly and sam grabs your hand and stuffs it into his boxers, making you grab his stiff cock.

"see, it's easy. i know you can do it." sam smiles at you as he guides your hand up and down his thick shaft, then eventually releasing your hand so you can do it yourself. sam unexpectedly begins to circle his thumb around your puffy clit while simultaneously pumping his single digit into your pussy, making you whimper pathetically.

i'm too high to finish this🧍‍♀️

#my mind just went blank #but you get the idea #moot:starvrse #nai answers! #sam monroe #sam monroe x you #sam monroe x reader #hayden christensen #hayden christensen x reader #st4rfckerz

[silversodas]

I wonder how well Vox even knows Alastor, because all we know for certain is that Vox wants Alastor’s attention, like he holds some kind of admiration for Alastor on some level. And I just have to wonder if that’s in spite of Alastor being a wacka-do that eats raw deer and constructed an organ made entirely out of furbies

#among other quirks #but you get the idea #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel vox #alastor #Vox #hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #hazbin alastor

[frikatilhi]

HUH HAH GAY

#käärijä #apollo #seriously the camera is so shaky #i'm not watching the screen so i keep losing him #but you get the idea #that's it that's the song now forever #thank you to who made that sign

[tcup-jenni-art]

I have more WIPs of this au but have this smol demo of the designs I’ve been thinking of and would *love* to expand more on

(also i’ve been scheduled at work for the last 8 days, so I got really lazy with the lineart and coloring)

#Trigun #trigun stampede #cyberpunk au #trigun cyberpunk au #it's more like bladerunner #because I'm still keeping all the science fiction elements #but you get the idea #I was also very drunk finishing this #so it's very self indulgent #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #meryl stryfe

[ladykeyleth]

Laudna: *gets hurt* Imogen, immediately: MY EYES FLASH WHITE 😡

#criticalroleedit #critteredit #critical role #imogen temult #imodna #I guess? even tho Laudna isn't present #but you get the idea #mgifs #C3E2 44m48s #C3E7 2h50m48s #C3E18 1h11m13s #C3E23 3h05m35s #it's the way she casts these at 2nd even at 3rd level #girl goes straight for their jugular no hesitation whatsoever

[hellcifrogs]

NaruFox AU Second fight - Sakura vs Shino: A battle of brains!

Prev / Next

Sakura knows she still can’t use powerful genjutsu, she only hoped it would last enough for her to get Shino to surrender.

#my art #NaruFox #naruto #naruto au #sakura haruno #shino aburame #chunin exams #dont worry sakura wasnt really going for the kill #I wanted to have them fight a little longer #throw a few punches #but you get the idea

[cassafrasscr]

Something something Orym being a widower and a romantic with so much love to give and no living partner to give it to.

'I'm super lonely all the time, especially at night. '

Something something Ashton being so starved for affection that he doesn't really know what love is supposed to feel like.

'I thought I was in love once, but now I'm not sure that's actually what it was. It's easy to confuse other feelings for love.'

Something something. Forehead kisses and hugs and gentle touches.

Something something.

#help i'm having feelings #it's 2am #i should be sleeping #but instead im thinking about #my bois #orym of the air ashari #ashton greymoore #ashrym #critical role #cr3 #loosely quoted #but you get the idea #cr3 e79 #cr3 e6 #🥺

[justapaige]

A quick drawing I did for Sherlock & Co.

#Sherlock & Co. #John Watson #Sherlock Holmes #Sherlock and Co #Podcast #Digital Art #I always saw artists talk about the quality when uploading to tumblr #and I never knew what they were talking about #I get it now #Also #I didnt go back for the exact quote #but you get the idea

[rhaenyratargayen]

listen to me! stop hating on alicent hightower for protecting her children. The same people that praise rhaenyra for her motherhood scorn alicent for hers. every time she looks at her children she hears otto warning her that if rhaenyra becomes queen, she will kill alicent’s children. she’s been in survival mode her entire life! her husband and her father are the king and the hand of the king and they both want someone different on the throne and she is forced in between. The queen in chains and all she wanted was her children to be safe.

#this is just rambling #but you get the idea #hotd rewatch #alicent hightower

[drconstellation]

Dark horses, revisited.

I was typing up a list tonight and something smacked me in the face.

If you haven't read @vidavalor's post about label on the wine bottle Crowley drinks from in the "Smitten" scene, read it first. They talk about all the horses that appear in S2. There is a red horse on the wine bottle, which refers us to to the relatively peaceful pre-war year of 1938, the dark horse statue in the shop that hold Crowley's sunglasses, Aziraphale is called a dark horse by Nina, and Jane Austin is Crowley's dark horse. And we may have missed out on more horses by not getting our wild west minisode.

Well, not all horses, I realised - we have missed one of the "dark horses," and its another direct reference to Crowley. Remember when Crowley does his infiltration of Heaven with Muriel, and he gets caught by Saraqael? They give us a quick call-back that they, too, once knew knew him as an angel.

Aaaaah! Now I wouldn't be a good amateur astronomer if I didn't know what that was! Of course I do, I just didn't put it next to all the other "dark horses" did I? Lets do that.

That's it, that's called a dark nebula, a big lot of dust and gas blocking off any light behind it. You've most likely seen this one before, it's quite famous.

Any thoughts on how this one fits in with the Starmaker, @vidavalor?

Oh, and I reckon we should add the Bentley in as the last dark horse, as it's Crowley's modern day steed, after all.

#good omens 2 #crowley #dark horse #dark horses #horsehead nebula #saraqael #I know its a crappy image #but you get the idea #the bentley #which Aziraphale took for a ride to Edinburgh and back