Every time I reach the last book in a favorite series that I have been reading for months - sometimes years -, that has accompanied me at various moments in my life, that each book was a small dose of the euphoria of living in that universe, that made me smile, cry, love their characters and feel comforted by them:
maybe we're not there yet, but the Grief and Loss Dynamics in Worlds Beyond Number are so devastating
suvi's commitment to hierarchy and knowledge so clearly shows how a child will internalize grief and trauma as something that can be avoided, if only they can control things and know better
ame's light and sweetness so painfully feels like the kind of grief that you hold onto that tricks you into believing it won't hurt so bad if you just don't look backwards -- for all her commitment to both worlds, to honoring the past and forging the future, ame still walks through the world with more items anyone could conceivably carry so that she never has to leave anything (anyone) behind
and eursulon -- oh, baby, eursulon. eursulon reminds me so clearly of what grief and trauma does to the way someone moves in the world when they know, bone deep, that their own skin and their own fear are the only things they can count on -- that joy is a thing meant to leave and it's not something you can design your life around
I know it's just a podcast -- but I just...have a lot of feelings
The reason that Lilith Clawthorne is accepted back into society so easily after everything is that her victims* usually didn't survive.
(*victim meaning the people most hurt by Lilith's actions as a member and eventual leader of the Emperor's coven.
Almost exclusively so called "wild witches", like the people we see at the beginning of Agony of a witch.)
(Also, Eda is the exception to that rule, but only because she's Lilith's sister.
We have every indication that Lilith did not treat any other wild witch like that.)
Have you ever read the Winternight trilogy? I'd love to see your artist take on some of those characters, especially after seeing your take on the ones from Spinning Silver!
yesss i have! i actually have some sketches somewhere but i was never happy with them so never posted :'D
Konstantin was my fave by far but i just couldnt get his face right in my drawings
ashaf being confident in his speech enough to deescalate situations or sway enemies to become allies is fun bc with helga and the paladin (cant remember his name woops. ice man), his gamble is shown to work, and probably would with most people, too
but with guideau its not quite as easy, he cant do some dramatic show of dropping his weapons or whatever while the threatened enemy thats unsure of ashaf is debating how to react, bc guideau will gladly kick his ass, no qualms about it, lol.
but guideau does always stop and listen to what ashasf has to say, even from the start, which leads to ashaf extending help leading to the main part of their relationship
and bringing up dunward vs guideau again, their difference in behavior shows that ashaf isnt weak or anything, he is in fact choosing not to be the aggressor, unlike in the B4 fall arc where he's no longer asking dunward for his help.
its an easy contrast to guideau, but i like that he is capable of harm but doesnt immediately resorting to it, like in the flashback arc where he opts for a different way to resolve the situation (though the kids still found it scary)
into the deep end - 30k T orufrey fic, focusing on memory trauma, disability, and romance.
the sweet oblivion of the victim, the poisoned freedom of the other.
for one moment - it had felt like two parts returned - the needed reunion of two disparate halves. no more secrets, no more pain.
the moment you get to give back what you never wanted to take. that moment, under the night-blooming flowers, when they had both let out the same single broken sigh of relief.
but they were never whole to begin with, were they?
qifrey swore he wouldn't say 'sorry' to this man any more if he could help it - sorry is cheap now. he didn't want to be in a position ever again where you only have 'sorry' left. so he just looks down into the threads of his blanket, strains his eye until it hurts, feeling his insides - his throat, heart and head - burn with pain. he expects more, but olly says nothing.