#discussing lgbt+ again

[uncanny-tranny]

Two things can be true at once:

1. Wanting queer people to be the storytellers of queer narratives is important, and it's okay to want queer people representing many queer experiences.

2. This does not, however, mean that queer people should put themselves in danger in order to be "good representation". We are not entitled to the queerness of others, just like nobody is entitled to yours.

#lesbian #gay #bi #bisexual #trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #queerphobia #i hate the expectation that queer people *need* to become representation for the broad queer community... #...i dunno i do NOT see myself as a queer representative and i think it'd be hella creepy if i WAS seen that way. i'm legit Some Guy Always #not /necessarily/ about the recent debacle that's happened but it has sparked this discussion once again (ad infinitum)

[bijoumikhawal]

also it really is shit how several popular bloggers were like. Horribly bigoted towards ace people when it was cool, but once it stopped being trendy they 1) deleted those posts so receipts couldn't be pulled 2) maybe put up claimed "redactions" or said "omg its been years if you really wanna know wether i still hate those people dm me" but never apologized for their behavior lmao. I don't think any of the people who did that actually changed, I just think they know it's not such an acceptable/fun target to bully anymore. It's really sick how that type of bullying was encouraged for years and how few people repented for their behavior.

#cipher talk #H*stlerose and lgbt*nis in particular come to mind #x***guiw*ng too tbh #They did a weird heel turn of being normal about ace people to insinuating most ace people are homophobic and self centered #And that believing a society which strictly controls your sex life doesn't like you not having sex and may punish you is a 'white thing' #As though the pressures around sex are not MORE strongly felt by PoC #I don't wanna say 'imagine if there was a mass movement of people who said they hated gay men and homophobia wasn't real and they never #Apologized or faced consequences' bc I know that exists. It's on Twitter and it's why I'm cagey around how people on tumblr say f*g #(I do mean like other lgbtq people tbc) #But like it's ridiculously fucked up that it happened. That people allowed it. That most people have forgotten about it either bc #They were targeted or bc they did the targeting #Remember when a real human being who had recently come out as ace was murdered for rejecting a man and people turned her into a fucking #Discourse topic? And posted decapitation photos claiming they were of her in tags about ace people/spread rumors about that? #I do. I fucking do. #Remember all the discussions about how 'denying your partner sex' was abuse? How ace people were p*dos for forcing discussions of sexuality #Onto kids? How wanting non alcoholic non sex forward spaces- something ND people and addicts also discussed- became a fucking crime? #Because ace people also thought it was cool? #Like g-d I know this was painful and I'm not saying we should do discourse again but forgetting all that isn't helpful either

[fairweathermyth]

this is fun to meee lol

#in-universe high fantasy casual discussions of queerness in a series that is not an explicitly queer story how fun #the b in lgbt is for BASHA lest you forget #anyway i looooove you denna 😩🙏 #and i am endlessly charmed by denna and kvothe's whole Thing. they're so sweet and stupid ahhh #the kingkiller chronicle #the wise man’s fear #patrick rothfuss #reading updates! #again thanks to the tumblrina who recced this series wherever you are #beyond this it really hits all of my sweet spots :)

[luvring]

just complained about my group to my irls and i'm pretty sure this has genuinely motivated me to speak in class because i Cannot let my prof think my critical thinking abilities are the same as theirs

#💬nia.rambles #rant fr// #guys im srsly sick thinking about it #LIKE THERE WERE SO MANY MOMENTS WHERE I WAS JUST ?? #'im not saying to beat your kid black and blue but discipline is different across cultures and #i just dont think this should be an area of exploration like its worked for hundreds of years' #? YOU AS A WOMAN OF COLOUR HAVE NEVER HEARD OF INTERGENERATIONAL TRAUMA? #like why are you implying you dont like gentle parenting why are you making a strawman DONT PISS ME OFF #then white guy speaking way too loud to my right is throwing in words he DOESNT understand and saying the same things over and over #'from a Sociological Contemporary perspective' be serious. 'it comes back to nature vs nurture again' Can you Stop Tlalkingplapewmj #and i bring up gender and he goes smth smth gender is just such a sensitive topic then the 2 other girls Agree #and they wouldnt let me talk and even if i did they obviously wouldnt know what i was talking about #because why are you asking what post structuralism is THAT WAS A MAIN TOPIC AND DEFINITION OF LAST CLASS??? 😭😭 #they wouldnt answer the question properly and repeat the same basic vaguely connected ideas the Entire time #like do i look like i gaf abt different body standards/expectations for football players MOVE ON ITS BEEN 10 MINUTES #like i want to talk about enforced binaries in queer spaces and Oh my god i just remembered #they were like. lgbt studies/discussion is just so recent and i was like. Its literally discussed In the reading. but None of u finished it #OHH IM PISSED OFF. IM SO PISSED OFF #and im so mad bc the discussion q's were Good and if i was w my irls wed have such a good convo but NO!!!! #whatever. Whatever im going to start raising my hand in class im so fr i got lightheaded complaining about this IMSOMADBSJF

[yourdailyqueer]

Lindo Bacon  

Gender: Genderqueer (they/them)

Sexuality: Queer

DOB: N/A

Ethnicity: Ashkenazi Jewish

Nationality: American

Occupation: Nutritionist, researcher, writer, public speaker

#Lindo Bacon #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbt people #queerness #non binary #genderqueer #queer #jewish #ashkenazi jewish #Nutritionist #scientist #researcher #writer #public speaker #lets try this again shall we without discussion about how they choose to name themselves #I think Lindo may have reblogged the original i'm not sure #repost

[nataliewaitegf]

🫶

#this is so tmi but w/e i’ll delete later but like . absolutely terrified of starting with a new therapist #bc i wanted an option i felt safer with (someone not m*rmon & preferably who’s lgbt/lgbt friendly) #but there’s literally one single place that my insurance covers and it’s in my tiny m*rmon town #n the last one i went to made me so uncomfortable i had to stop going #and just like . i wanted the OPTION to feel safe and understood for all of me #but i already know i have to steer clear of religious trauma and of coming out #but the last one just straight up asked me my sexuality and put me in the position of like . coming out or lying abt it #or saying im not comfortable saying which would be the same as coming out basically and idk im so fucking sad and anxious abt this #even tho none of that is what im even going back to therapy for #but like . i just wanted to feel safe :( #and switching the insurance would be so much work and i don’t even know if i could . and if i did what if it was a waste and the person #who i wanted to see doesn’t work out and i have to start all over again and it’s just . i wanna cry sgjsgjfsj #don’t like starting with someone new and already knowing there’ll be huge parts of me & my past trauma that i can’t discuss :(

[fiapple]

i just think it would be cool to see multigender people represented in discussions of gender politics more frequently, which is to say more than never.

the same goes for discussions of art, sexuality, the trans experience, the nonbinary experience more specifically, representation in media, so on & so forth. i just think it would be cool if the community didn’t treat us like a phase or non-entity.

#like y’all hate us. you either don’t talk about us or make fun of us or just outright treat us like the lite version of whatever gender you #find most convenient irregardless of fucking context. #i saw another post abt trans rep in art that i don’t want to derail #but then i was thinking abt that but multigender & realized we’re just… never there. #like even when nonbinary people are represented it’s those leaning genderless- which isn’t to say that group should have less that’s not #what i mean this isn’t an rep instead situation- it’s just very unbalanced. #& like it goes to the fact that due to internalized transphobia & cissexism y’all are very uncomfortable with men who are also women. #we’re never discussed in gender politics or in discussions regarding trans experience or sexuality etc like. #& it shows that we don’t even get the bare-minimum positivity art posts from our community. #i am once again thinking about the unbridled wildly undiscussed vitrol the lgbt community has for multigender individuals. gonna stop #before i get incomprehensibly angry actually. tldr do better for your multigender fellows you fuckers. #trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbt+ #queer #genderqueer #nonbinary #multigender #bigender #polygender #neogender #xenogender #pride month

[vampirehowl]

ik its actually because you have to actually read and put a significant amt of effort in comparatively to like know enough abt mina and gideon to enjoy them over katya so the fan spaces for them are smaller compared to katya but the fact that gideon is the ONLY butch on the ENTIRE bracket and shes still is only getting just under 1/3rd of a three way poll (although thats still significant considering the popularity of goncharov) is. well it just brings me a lot of questions i guess abt the types of characters ppl are more willing to support over others

#I WANT TO BE SO INCREDIBLY CLEAR IM NOT ACCUSING KATYA AND MINA VOTERS OF BEING BUTCH HATERS I WANT TO BE SO FUCKING CLEAR #IM JUST SAYING LIKE IT REALLY MADE ME THINK ABT HOW WE CLAIM TO BE VERY LGBT SUPPORTIVE BUT OUT OF ALL THE MEDIA WE CONSUME THERES NOT A LOT #OF BUTCHES #AND THAT THE ONE BUTCH THAT IS POPULAR ON THIS WEBSITE FACES THE OBSTICLE OF EXISTING IN A MEDIUM #THAT WOULD KINDA LIMIT THE FANBASE TO MOSTLY PPL WHO ENJOY READING #SO ALL THINGS CONSIDERED SHES DOING GREAT #BUT ITS WEIRD TO ME THAT THESE OTHER MEDIUMS ESP VISUAL ONES DO NOT HAVE A LOT OF BUTCHES #AND THE ONES THAT ARE REPRESENTED ARE NOT POPULAR IN THE GRAND SCHEME #AND I THINK MAYBE ITS WORTH A DISCUSSION! #talks #twe23 #the locked tomb #im not tagging the other ones bc this is just self ref tags incase i need to find it again #like out of 65 ish characters theres only ONE unabashedly butch is just #idk #like also to be clear this isnt the creator of the elections fault either like its just who is popular #*the butches that are represented in visual media are not popular i mean #sorry just realized that was phrased unclearly

[oceanic-sunsets]

this isnt about anyone or anything in particular just general fandom behavior ive seen but im begging people to rethink how they react to discussions about sexuality when it comes to lgbtq+ minor fictional characters. Fandoms aren’t teaching-learning spaces in the traditional sense by any means, but for queer teens (like a lot of us once were) sometimes it becomes the only space in which you are recognized.

the argument i see the most is about protecting minors and accusing everyone of being a creep at the slightest mention of implied attraction. but... by doing that you’re doing the opposite of protecting them😭. you can make a lot of queer kids feel like their attraction isn’t something natural. like they’re the odd ones out, especially if they grow up surrounded by their straight friends who get to talk about that openly and have a million stories to relate to.

I was just thinking about the way sttwt has been known to react whenever someone implies mike and will are attracted to each other and the way they treated authors about their fics in which they KISS.

im genuinely asking. do you not want lgbtq+ teens to grow up with stories they can relate to and make them feel less alone. and i don’t mean nsf//. im talking about being able to write fics which feature these conversations in a respectful way without people making authors go through hell. one of the best examples i can think of is the latest plot of the heartstopper comic. the characters are 16, in a relationship and they talk about sex, boundaries and consent with each other and their friends. And the thing is, coming of age stories about straight characters growing up include these topics most of the time. i do not understand why do you want it to be different for queer kids. you are making the same arguments as conservative people, the same ones they use to fire teachers who DARE to mention lgbtq+ kids exist too, the same ones they use in states where they’re controlling the school libraries (mind you im not even american, but i heard about it). you’re advocating for the wrong cause here i’m begging you to understand.

some heartstopper screenshots bc i love it and the Normal way in which the author (an adult. bc then there’s the ppl who demonize you as soon as you turn 18 and are still part of fandom spaces) handles the discussion of sexuality.

#just some thoughts #i saw a couple of comments on twt that made me feel upset. #it’s like y’all wanna go BACKWARDS #like arent you seeing teachers get fired for including lgbt students in their lessons about sexuality #and diverse books being banned. #like be fr #fandom is the one space queer kids turn to where they can feel a bit more normal and represented #but not if y’all keep up that energy #of WE SHOULD NOT DISCUSS THIS. #AGAIN im not talking about nsf* content. #im talking about it being a part of coming of age stories #and in st it is intrinsically tied with the rest of the plot including the supernatural #ok rant over. not using any more specific tags #like i dont want it to show up in the b*ler tag or anything. but if you saw this and agree cool

[lottieurl]

when's pride month i forgot

#i need to blacklist shit so i can avoid seeing westerners whining abt rainbow capitalism dhzjdjssn #wish i had your problems etc #pride month is honest to god the worst time on this webbed site the takes are godawful half the time & pride month doesnt exist for me irl #absolutely pointless to even remember and all it means is ppl passionately discussing kink at pride once again #and complaining abt pride flags 'everywhere' which is very funny to me #come here and visit me! promise you wont see a single rainbow flag but you will see 'fuck lgbt' written on my building #you'll love it here #anyway

[uncanny-tranny]

How do you set boundaries with ppl about attraction. I’m a binary trans man and I prefer people who aren’t lesbians and/or people who are exclusively attracted to non-men attracted to me, but I feel awkward telling people to not be attracted to me

I think part of it is making it clear what your identity is, honestly. And I'll be honest, it can feel weird to know certain people are attracted to you, I totally get that. However, I'd definitely encourage you to try not to look too deeply into it. Attraction is weird, it can manifest in weird ways, and sometimes it isn't even necessary that the person attracted to you will... do anything about it.

There are definitely ways to set that boundary that can be... crass, I suppose. I'd encourage you not to do so, such as antagonizing people solely for being attracted to you. I find that simply causes more conflict and heartache for both parties. Now, if the person is trying to force you into a relationship, that's one thing, and I'm not talking about that.

I think a simple, "I'm very flattered, but I'm a trans guy, and I'm not really comfortable or ready for a relationship like that" can do wonders. Like, I totally get where you're coming from, but I want to emphasize that many times, people attracted to you aren't doing it inherently in bad faith. Attraction is something you can't really prevent or stop. You can make it clear what interactions you want, but it doesn't invalidate your manhood if somebody is attracted to you, y'know? That's something they don't have power to do, and I think knowing that can make it easier to say to yourself, "they might be attracted to me and that doesn't change anything about who I am."

I hope this makes sense. If somebody doesn't respect who you are after that, then that is on them, not you. You aren't required to explain yourself further. You aren't required to reciprocate if somebody expresses attraction.

#ask #anon #trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #nonbinary #like... even other queer people discuss others being attracted to them in ways they don't or can't reciprocate #so it's definitely not something you're alone in #like i've had people express attraction to me despite me being trans and aroace and so i don't/can't reciprocate myself #like... you aren't REQUIRED to reciprocate. unrequited love and attraction is one of those things a ton of us experience #and both parties don't have to be bad. if somebody expresses that attraction they aren't bad and you aren't either #the only thing that is bad is how somebody goes about that attraction #so if they tried forcing you or coercing you into a relationship or used blackmail then obviously that's not okay #but the attraction itself doesn't force their hand. they're just being a fucking ass and horrible #anyway i do hope this might help again: if somebody isn't respecting you even if you say 'no' then fucking run. they aren't worth your time

[thenerdcommander]

How unhappy does a mf have to be before life stops dishing out shit

#I literally just EXIST here and out of nowhere my family starts spouting LGBT phobic rhetoric AGAIN #and they picked a fight with me because I'm notoriously bad at debate (I shut down and can't make points) #so I dismissed them and they went "That's what they all do. When you back them into a corner they just say 'You're uneducated' and run away #like bitches??? I'm ending the discussion here because you won't hear what I'm telling you #you think you know it all so you won't listen and then when people give up you tally it as a victory for your argument #I'm exhausted and hurt and I just want to be out of here right tf now #but I feel trapped #it doesn't matter how much research I do I don't know HOW to get out #and no one will help me learn #and with everything the way it is I don't think I'll be able to move anywhere #even if I figure it out #and I'll be living in poverty no matter where I go unless I sacrifice my already piss-poor mental health to work 2-3 jobs #I know that's standard and I don't have a right to complain about that but I'm scared

[birdmenmanga]

absolutely horrifying that I can’t write bird essays and draw bird pictures at the same time

#just thinking thoughts... #someone was going through my bird posts and they found my 'elaborate postcanon universe' post #and I was suddenly reminded of it again...THIS TIME WITH THE HORRIBLE ADDITIONAL THOUGHT OF. #what if they were leyendecker studies. #LIKE BOY. STOP #YOU CAN'T EVEN POST RIGHT-HAND MAN ON TUMBLR YET BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED THE BANNER FOR IT #AND YOU WANNA DO LEYENDECKER STUDIES. #YOU WANNA DO LEYENDECKER STUDIES???? SHUT UPPPP LITERALLY SHUT UP!!! #Anyways I'm saying all this to say that I actually started writing my essay on the battle against the press part 1 #I was just. pacing back and forth in my room muttering under my breath and I had to get it out of my system #'and the FACT that EDEN the INSTITUTION chose to FORCE the birdmen into the limelight— and the location is at SCHOOL— #'hearkens back to the age-old concept of 'think of the children' when it comes to discussing lgbt rights' #I didn't even get to that part of the essay lol #I barely wrote anything tbh :sob: #I only covered birdmen as an urban legend in the intro #and then got sidetracked about the dangers of living as a queer person without proper resources and education #oops! #but it's only one paragraph and I don't really want to put it in a separate essay lol

[swiftful-thinking13]

there’s a 99% chance that your bad future therapist is in my cohort :DD

#now I understand why people have shit therapists I’m literally in class with them #I don’t even know where to start #how about with the old white man who told me that I’m sexist because I wouldn’t hug a male client after I made it abundantly clear that I #wouldn’t hug ANY client as I think it’s crossing boundaries #OR! how about me explaining the importance of cultural competence to my classmate who said that skin color isn’t a factor in therapy ???? #ORRRR OR my other classmate who referred to the LGBTQ+ community as the LGBT-whatever #ESP DURING PRIDE MONTH ???? wtf bro #i will never forget when I had to explain to someone why you shouldn’t say the r-word :) #this rant is probably fueled by my internalized ageism but my fucking god #teach! yourself! to! be! culturally! competent! #read books! watch documentaries! listen to podcasts! read articles! #one day these people are going to sit with someone emotionally vulnerable and breach the standard of care bc of their ignorance #again maybe I’m just being ageist #but if you are 40+ and want to become a therapist because you’re bored—DON’T DO IT #you will seriously end up hurting people with your lack of awareness and empathy #and if you do it is IMPERATIVE that you familiarize yourself with today’s world and cultures outside of your own #for crying out loud #sorry for the rant but I’m fuming #I just had to respond to someone’s discussion thread about how *mean* and *unfair* it is to blame white men #and ofc it was a white woman who wrote it bye

[elinaline]

.

#looking at how america is organized it was not a matter of '''how many voters'' #the country is gerrymandered to hell and back. by number of people trump was not zlected #now here's the fun thing and why i reblog it: it's gonna happen in france too #in the last few hears we've seen antifeminist sentiment on the rise and lgbt rights are being discussed again #macron is following closely what happens in the usa to determine what is acceptable #if the supreme court repeals this law its gonna be open bar for him to be exactly as authoritarian as he wants #and to think a week ago i was relieved he was elected and not le pen.... that was short

[thottybrucewayne]

Yeah, this is why we need to be having discussions about transmisogynoir and general antiblackness within the lgbt spaces online cause what do you MEAN you couldn't think of a comparable situation when Black bloggers are literally being shadowbanned and sniped left right, and center? Do you know how many Black trans women have been harassed off of tumblr? Just during the summer of 2020 alone? I'm not about to waste time talking over things that have already been said but like, again, what the fuck is wrong with yall???????

#thotty speaks