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olderthannetfic · 7 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/729708592592306176/how-about-a-different-discourse-death-of-the

What this ask is missing, a bit, is that Death of the Author *does* mean that the author’s take on things is no more or less valid than anyone else’s. It’s about decentering authorial intent in analyses of media. Barthes is pretty clear and quite pointed about it in the original essay.

What bothers me about misuses of it and what I think this anon means to say is when people start decentering the actual *text*. The idea behind Death of the Author is also that the text stands alone. You don’t need to look at any extra shit to understand it. As you said, it was a response to a mode of analysis that obsessed over plumbing through author biographies.

The issue with what people do in fandom is they ignore the text. “I don’t like this element of canon, so it doesn’t exist.” (Which is different from arguing that it’s there but it sucks because of XYZ reasons, so I’m going to consciously ignore it in my fan works. This is when people just act like it isn’t there in the text in the first place.) “You have to take my bizarro world out-of-nowhere headcanon that is based on nothing except that I want it to be true, that I love this character and I wish they were XYZ therefore they are” and take it just as seriously as headcanons that actually engage with what’s in the show/video game/book/movie/whatever and use that as their basis (like building off something that is subtextual in the original work).

Granted we all do this to some degree, we all come to a text with our own biases and you can’t *always* easily separate those out, and that can affect, for instance, your interpretation of what the subtext is, but I think the irritating fandom behavior is when this kind of ignoring-the-text-to-substitute-your-own-reality is this very deliberate sort of laziness. The annoying thing in my current fandom is people who are fans of this one ship that they insist is the most progressive and other people just don’t see the scintillating “subtext” of because we are bigots or whatever, between two characters who don’t interact that much for two MCs and when they do it’s not at all shippy (but these characters both have very shippy subtext with different characters), but where these people think the ship *should* exist because of their identities. And their “evidence” for the ship is always gifsets taken way out of context and not including the dialogue that makes the non-shippy context for that scene very clear (including that it might actually be shippy for conflicting pairings). It’s like this bizarre version of “close reading” that strips out the largely context *deliberately* in order to make a particular conclusion seem more compelling than it actually is.

Anyway, all that ignoring-the-text stuff is STILL bad analysis per DOTA. Since the point of DOTA is to go based on the text, if you’re obscuring the text you’re kind of just installing yourself as a new author.

This is why DOTA doesn’t mean “anything goes.” It just means “authorial intent is just one interpretation that doesn’t have to matter.” It doesn’t mean other stuff we use in analysis doesn’t matter, and if anything the point is to make it even more text-centric than the older author-centric analyses were. People can still disagree about what the text says, of course, but they should both be going back to it in how they construct those arguments, and not, like those shippers, deliberately ignoring chunks of the text that weaken their arguments.

I don't think all of them are consciously throwing out actual canon, but they are often throwing out all context that would help evaluate subtext.

Like... if you're analyzing a Marvel movie, you might ignore what the director said in an interview, but you probably shouldn't entirely ignore the fact that it is a Marvel movie and apply assumptions that make sense for some arthouse film.

And, yes, if you're arguing for shippy subtext, even unintentional on the part of creators, "I like this ship because..." needs very little, but "This ship has more support than this other ship" requires going back to the actual text and looking at it in its totality.

There's a lot of faux-intellectualism around garbage like TJLC where people try to make themselves feel smart by using the language of close reading while having the media literacy of a bucket of rotting fish.

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haircoveredwriter · 7 months

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Episode 1X05 "Deux Amours" thoughts

(Warning: if I don't make sense in this post, I apologize. I've been trying to put this together for the past 20 mins but my brain has been fried by the episode it seems).

The fifth installment of the Daryl Dixon series is a GIANT - let me repeat this - G I A N T culminating expression of Daryl's fears/desires/drive to get home to Carol. If anyone was in doubt before they would have to be living in another dimension not to see it after "Deux Amours".

Starting with the conversations between Daryl and Azlan throughout the episode, Daryl's focus on getting home is clear. Our boy is still obsessed with finding a working radio for a specific call even in the flashbacks, but more on that later ��. Azlan asks him about the promise he made which drives him on his journey to get back home, and Norman's acting of subtle reacting to the other man's points of (I'm paraphrasing) "sometimes a man's promise gets detoured around the realities of life" encompasses the tone of the entire show and the rest of the episode. "It's a home for the soul" If that isn't Caryl, I don't know what is.

When Laurent asks him about his friends there's an obvious pairing and splitting up of the groupings he chooses to answer with; Judith & RJ, Connie & Ezekiel, Carol. There are the kids, his friend ... and then " a woman named Carol". His pause and voice change upon saying her name warms my little shipper heart. If only Laurent hadn't jumped in so quick to continue the conversation. Look kid, the man was having a MOMENT! Read the room, sheesh. Lol.

I've haven't seen many bring this up but imo the young man at the gas depot during the flashback's was another huge planted plot point for Caryl. Daryl's whole thing has been how he needs to get home, and the kid is there "just trying to make it home to his girl". He promised he get enough gas to pick her up and take her away, the two of them together, out to California. Does that ring any bells to anyone???? NEW MEXICO IS STILL OUT THERE.

THAT radio call scene. Yes. Everything about it ... yes. I don't think I can do it justice trying to put it into words but @mcbride made a wonderful gifset of it for you to view or I know there are clips of the scene out there as well.

**Special recognition for the fact a lot of these Caryl callback scenes occurred by the river/while Daryl was in a make shift tent similar to the one at his s9 camp.**

Now we've reached the infamous Daryl/Laurent/the boat scene. I'm not going to get into a debate of whether he was wrong or right to go off on a kid like that; I'm going to deal solely with my perceived reasoning behind Daryl's actions. IMO finding the boat gone and subsequently that Laurent is the one who cut the rope was the straw that broke the camels back - so it were - for Daryl's emotions through the whole show about going home. Everything had been building up emotionally for Daryl until this point in the series; every past attempt to get home thwarted or delayed somehow, and having the person who he's supposed to be getting to The Nest where he will get what he's been after ... a way home ... blow things up in his face was too much to bear. The thought that maybe he may not actually get back to Carol overwhelming him and leading him to blow up at Laurent. I think the timing of this scene in the episode should also be taken into consideration, immediately after the radio call.

The groundwork has been laid out for Carol's reappearance in the season finale, whether that is in France or somewhere else that is still yet to be seen but all roads lead to Caryl.

#caryl #caryl positivity #carol peletier #daryl dixon #carol and daryl #twd spoilers #twd: daryl dixon #carol loves daryl #daryl loves carol

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shrinkthisviolet · 11 months

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for the ship ask game: maiko!

Ship It!

What made you ship it?

I think it might've been spite at first? It's so clearly canon, but it's surprisingly unpopular in fandom. And it wasn't abusive or toxic or anything (despite what some people say), so I liked the idea of it out of spite to those who didn't.

And then from there, I just...found more things to love about it. Things that fics included, things that I noticed in gifsets and meta posts about them (and even blatantly false/misinterpreted things in posts criticizing them), etc. And now it's snowballed so incredibly...and they're my favorite ship in the show (with Kataang as a very close second, because obviously...it just can't top Maiko for me because Maiko is more personal to me)

What are your favorite things about the ship?

How she's able to make him smile (one of the few people who can!), how she takes no bs from him (when he lashes out in jealousy, she calls him out and doesn't forgive him until he apologizes for it), how their daughter looks so much like her…just AHHHH I love them so much!

(I also have a headcanon that they eloped shortly after reconnecting, because despite changing in the three years apart, they both knew there was no one else for them. And then they got to know each other after that! Which is a bit like how arranged marriages work - you marry someone who you feel you can spend the rest of your life with, someone who you feel you can love, someone who you feel can fit into your family (and whose family can fit int your family) and then you get to know them! That's what I mean when I call Maiko "personal", because even though that headcanon isn't canon, it makes sense to me with where they are in the finale)

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Apparently even shipping it seems to be unpopular 😂 so many people would rather ship the two of them with anyone else, or act like their love wasn't real, or was comphet, or something. But these two were so in love!! Mai fell first, and Zuko fell harder!!

Mai, to Azula, the friend she's lowkey afraid of, who probably knows what Azula does even to her friends when they disobey her: "I love Zuko more than I fear you."

Zuko, to Sokka, about his Mai even after he broke up with her to keep her safe, in response to "That gloomy girl who sighs a lot?": Yeah... *dreamy smile*

This is CANON DIALOGUE PEOPLE

Plus the stuff I said in the second question!! All of which (except the ending parantheses) is canon!!

ship ask game!

#avatar the last airbender #atla #mai #maiko #zuko #ship ask game #i love love LOVE maiko so so much

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such-a-barbarian · 5 months

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Thanks @callivich for some fun questions! and thanks to @jrooc and @zutaralesbian for the extra push to actually sit down and think about these! haha

What’s a fic you’ve read more than once?

Oh man, the better question might be is there a fic I've only read once. haha. If we are talking about fics I've reread the most then probably Cooperative Gameplay and Like Real People Do by Grayola, Sexual Harassment in the Workplace by Shamelessquestions, The Only Fans series by GallavichGeek13 and every single fic on this soulmate AU recommendation list. I am a chronic rereader - it's a problem. lol

What’s a gifset you always have to reblog?

Dock scene. Always the dock scene.

What’s a fanart you love looking at?

@darthvaders-wife's Kinktober collection is insane. I'm not ok about it.

What’s an idea you’d love to create if you had the time/inspiration?

I really loved the movie Nimona and have thought a lot about a Gallavich Goldenheart crossover. If you have not seen Nimona yet 1) I highly recommend it and 2) this probably won't make a lot of sense, but... Like does it take place during their training years? Sure. Are Mickey and Ballister childhood best friends from the wrong bloodlines to be knights? Probably. Has Ian been forced into knighthood because of his bloodline? Also probably. Do Mickey and Ian somehow meet through Ballister and Ambrosius and immediately hate each other?! For sure. Do they fall madly in love when they realize they have more in common than they originally thought?!?! Obviously!

Anyway, I am not a writer so this will just stay a lovely little idea in my head.

What’s something you’ve discovered since entering this fandom? A new trope you love? A different analysis of the show? Something else? I had only ever dabbled in fandom before this, so I had no idea soulmate AUs were a thing. And oh boy do I LOVE soulmate AUs!

What’s an underrated trope or concept you’d like to see more of?

I haven't really gone out of my way to look for any, so maybe there are a ton and I just don't know about them, but I'd love to see more historical AUs! I'm also open to recs even though I already have 20+ fics on my "to read later" list. What's one (or ten) more!

What line/dialogue/description from something else (a poem, a book, a tv show, a movie, or something else) do you feel describes Ian and Mickey’s relationship? "It had flaws, but what does that matter when it comes to matters of the heart? We love what we love. Reason does not enter into it. In many ways, unwise love is the truest love. Anyone can love a thing because. That's as easy as putting a penny in your pocket. But to love something despite. To know the flaws and love them too. That is rare and pure and perfect." From A Wise Man's Fear by Patrick Rothfuss

What do you think is next for Ian and Mickey post-finale?

They will eventually become parents and you will never convince me otherwise. I also think Ian will eventually get out of their business and go back to school to become some type of mental health counselor or advocate or I don't know, but he needs to help people.

The original questions are here if you feel so inclined! @lupeloto, @krystallouwho, @sgtmickeyslaughter, @francesrose3, @juliakayyy, @catluvver118, @transmickey, @tanktopgallavich or anyone else!

#tag game #gallavich

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hunter-sylvester · 3 months

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Hi! I’m the anon who wrote the ask about Hunter’s parental issues and about his attachment to Kevin. Thank you for answering my asks, I absolutely love the way you write and how you explain everything! You’re extremely talented!🫶

I honestly didn’t notice how in love Hunter was with Kevin until I watched the movie a second time. It’s crazy how you can literally see all feeling in Hunter’s eyes when he looks at Kevin. I also loved how you said that their relationship fits a BDSM bratting dynamic, because I totally see it.

[and as someone who has ADHD and deals with RSD on a regular, I completely understand him. It sucks.]

Hey 🤘 [prev ask for context] Yeah I obviously couldn’t be 100% sure they were from the same person but it definitely makes the most sense lol

Thank you so much! I’m really glad you enjoy my rambling thoughts about Hunter as a character <3

If you do like my writing, I’m tempted to sheepishly gesture over to my actual Metal Lords fics over on Ao3 if you haven’t checked them out, even tho it makes me feel like a bit of a dick to do so 😅 (They are mostly locked to registered users, blame AI data scraping. The only Metal Lords fic not locked rn is a tiny ficlet. An Ao3 account is free tho 👀)

In any case, I really appreciate that you pushed me to do a bit of analysis again. Because sometimes I tend to forget that all the stuff that lives in my head as “obvious” isn’t always stuff I’ve said out loud on here lmao

There’s a lot to pull from the film if you’re willing to be a bit mentally ill about it.

And you’re absolutely right about the way he looks at Kevin, I mean, it happened enough for me to make a whole ass gifset of it lmao

Look at him. The boy is smitten. Clueless, of course. But smitten.

Which I credit basically entirely to Adrian Greensmith, as it was a vision he had for the character. I really can’t imagine Hunter having been played by anyone else as he brought so much to the role. (Fun fact, if I remember correctly: Noah Urrea, who plays Clay, originally auditioned for Hunter. No harm but I'm very glad he didn't get that. He makes a good Clay and Hunter just needed to be played by Adrian.)

One of the key things Adrian brought to the role also being, probably accidentally, his anxiety.

"I spent a lot of Metal Lords feeling a bit anxious [...] and in hindsight I wonder if some of that was just a sign that Hunter was quite an anxious character [...] I mean his body's so tense all the time." - Adrian Greensmith.

I shortened that quite a bit so I'm including a slightly longer clip of the interview audio for more context. (I can upload a subtitled video clip if anyone wants that as well as link the video on yt but I'd have to do a bit of a search for that)

Aside: If I had to guess I'd say he's probably referring to Peter Sollett who directed Metal Lords when he mentions a 'Pete'.

And yeah the bratting thing was a little bit of a joke but mostly not a joke. Without going absolutely off the deep end, the mentality behind bratting is something I really see in Hunter.

Evie Lupine has a wonderful video about bratting and why people would be interested in it (and why some people hate it) but a short snippet that always spoke to me from that is the following:

"The motivations behind bratting are pretty varied. I think one of the main ones would be a sense of security and comfort. This is when the acting out is sort of a way to be reassured that even when you, break rules, even when you push at things, the partner that you're with is not going to abandon you." - Evie Lupine

Obviously, with Hunter's fear of abandonment, it's easy to see why this would appeal to him.

He also just...idk he has brat energy - sincerely, a brat.

And Kevin does just play out the counterpart to that. He doesn't always have Hunter under control but he tries to.

And he does mostly act as that safe person to brat against, which again amplifies the impact it has when Hunter starts to think he's actually losing Kevin, destroying that feeling of safety.

Aside: I obviously don't think that these characters, in universe, negotiated for a bratting dynamic. In universe it'd be something that just sort of organically developed within their friendship/relationship. But even more than that it's an archetype of a dynamic that we as the audience can easily read into their interactions if that makes sense.

Can you believe the shit they will accidentally put in movies? lmao

And yeah, I have ADHD as well. And RSD is something that affects me pretty fucking severely. I've only really become more aware of it in the past year or so as my partner has pointed it out more and more.

So it's definitely something that I then noticed more and more in Hunter too.

Obviously this is all just my take on the character, and other people might have totally different interpretations. That's the beauty of art, we all get to find what we need in it and read it in our own ways, influenced by our own life experiences.

Thank you again for asking, Anon 🤘 (if you want to use a nickname or smth to identify that you're the same Anon, let me know. If not, that's totally okay too, but I might not always know it's you)

#this was supposed to be more CASUAL and it kinda is?? just still...long lmao #it's over fucking 800 words again #metal lords #hunter sylvester #answered ask #hunters asks #anon ask #hunterwriteswords #character analysis #adrian greensmith #kevin x hunter #kevin schlieb #my post #gifs

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kohakhearts · 5 months

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hey that pokemon 2000 gifset + your jn dub analysis made me think about the pokemon 2000 dub - I've only seen it subbed once (compared to the hundred times I watched it dubbed as a child) so I could be misremembering, but didn't the dub completely change the themes of the movie with the chosen one ash thing?

i actually haven’t watched the sub nearly as many as times as the dub either :p but i have read extensively about this topic bc it’s personally my favourite pokemon movie and yes! the first and second pokemon movies are both victim to this (like mewtwo’s epic speech we all love so much at the end of the first movie…being a complete fabrication by the dub team :p you gotta give those writers credit - they were VERY good at what they did), largely i’m guessing due to cultural values and expectations. since they were trying to sell the anime to an american audience, not a japanese one.

tangentially, i will say i also think that’s the root of this like…subtle distinction some people have between the characters “ash” and “satoshi.” i don’t differentiate them in any big way myself because fundamentally they still are very much the same, but it is true that in japanese, ash has somewhat different mannerisms and responds differently to events at times, especially in the early anime when it was so much easier to get away with making big changes for…a big assortment of reasons haha.

in THIS movie in particular, some of those things are like…well. the prophecy is probably the most obvious change. the dub team rewrote it to include the chosen one reference, which works great because of the word play on ash’s name. in japanese, it just says “an exceptional trainer will appear to help calm the wrath of the gods.” ash’s response to this is more mild trepidation than outright fear. he doesn’t hesitate like he does in the dub. and tbh? both reactions make perfect sense for his character in my opinion.

in japanese, his concern is more "do you really think i can fit that role?" this...tracks pretty well with his character development by this point. like yeah he said he could win the indigo league, but he's also thinking about dropping out after gary loses; it's that little grain of insecurity he has, which he's normally good at covering up with arrogance (a lot of which is also very genuine, don't get me wrong). but he sees the opportunity to help and he takes it. that's just...what ash does.

in english, though, the prophecy is pretty clearly about him. there's no one else it could be. it has to be him. and he...doesn't like that? that scares him. which, fair. anyone would be terrified by being singled out like that. it's also so much...not ash's thing, even at this point in the series. his character development is about embracing having to work hard to do well. to keep trying until you get it right, no matter how many times you get it wrong. the idea of being a "chosen one" completely robs him of his ability to be so single-minded about what he wants his destiny to be that it manifests as pre-determined; it just...pre-determines it for him, if that makes sense. lol.

the thesis of the japanese version of the film is that no one person or pokemon can stand on their own. everyone needs help. it's about harmonizing with each other and with nature. about letting others help you, and helping them in turn. the english version rewrites that into a story about power and destiny. the title alone says it all, right? it's called "the power of one" - no reference to lugia, no reference to the birds. in japan, the title is about the revelation (or "birth") of lugia.

westerners love a good chosen one story, so this was a really good choice by the dub team in that respect. i mean, it's a narrative that's stuck really well. fandom loves chosen one ash! in general, western fanbases are really into this narrative. it's everywhere. and there's a lot that goes into that, culturally, and especially religiously, historically, etc. so at the end of the day, i don't think the change is so much about conflicting ideas about collectivism and individualism. it's more about goals and ideals, on a personal level.

let me say again for the 273456784th time, i love that they resolved ash's story by having him realize that the goal he's really been striving for all this time is to meet and befriend pokemon. to learn from them. to earn their trust. it's like...he did the thing that everyone else thought represented his goal, maybe even himself included, only to realize that his dream was never about the end of it anyway. it was about everything he learnt and everyone he met along the way. (i also suspect nobody writing in 1997 knew that that would be the ultimate resolution, either. but it makes sense in the entire context. it's kind of a nice irony, even. to only figure it out after writing the story :p)

and i think this little distinction is important to that goal! it's his whole character! which is why even though i too love chosen one characters, i don't necessarily think of ash as one. because even if he is, his whole Thing is that he wants to try. a lot of the chosen one narrative is about characters being reluctant to be used for a "greater good," or about them collapsing under that pressure. ash doesn't really have that. he does what he thinks is right because he...thinks it's right. sometimes, sure, others have to push him into it a bit, but usually they're actually pushing the other way - it's too dangerous, you're going to get hurt, etc. and to me, i don't know - thinking of times he's died, or nearly died, and some legendary or mythical pokemon has saved him at the last minute...i don't think that has to mean he's special in a cosmic sort of way. i think it just means he's special to them. that he did something for them, or for someone else they had come to care for (thinking manaphy responding to may's emotions, not just to the fact that ash was drowning, or in mpm ash convincing latios to trust him because of their mutual desire to save latias, etc.), and so they want to help him. which is completely opposite to the typical chosen one narrative, i think? because he doesn't do those things out of obligation...he does them because he thinks he can become a better trainer by doing them, and he wants to do that. and well. he did do that.

anyway my tl;dr here is YES they changed the theme a lot haha, but i find it fun that they also changed the characters’ responses to that theme. funnily that’s…kind of also what fanfiction writers do all the time, lmao, but that’s a whole other conversation.

#answered #im sure id have something more insightful to say if id watched the original recently but i havent Dx #*meta #i guess #also re: the chosen one narrative being very religious #its more to the idea specifically of a character who does selfless things for the sake of being selfless and it often ends with the #character martyring themself somehow. which i dont think it’s necessarily WRONG to say is what ash does. self-sacrificial is not a Bad way #to describe him. i think its a reasonable and compelling read on his character. its just not mine i guess because as much as i also love #chosen one characters what i love most about it isnt the fact that they are a chosen one #so much as what the consequences of that have been because what they really want deep down is to just…not have to save the world #but ash isnt really like that. saving the world is more of a byproduct of what hes actually trying to do. which is to help others #rather than being forced to save the world to help the ones he cares for. its kinda opposite. idk. maybe i’ll write a post about this #properly someday bc rn my brain is mush and i can only think of three major western franchises that even have chosen ones lol

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littlespoonevan · 1 year

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fuck it friday

so bASICALLY @elvensorceress tagged me in temptation tuesday and @mellaithwen tagged me in wip wedneday and i saw both of them too late to post on the designated days therefore here is an amalgamation of the two in which you get the list of fics i lowkey want to write and a snippet from my current wip lmao

potential wips:

hercules au - bc amy brought it up again last week and liSTEN the plot is Very appealing with 911 characters even if i’m still not sure of some of the logistics skdjafh

miss congeniality au - i am being 100% serious when i say that this enters my brain at least once a week every week since i first thought of it. it can Work, okay??? i’ve figured it out eddie is undercover and buck is the contestant with the sunshine smile that takes a shine to him, i’ve got the backstory i can make it all fit together!!!!!!

eddie diaz; secret romantic - basically i saw a gifset from past is prologue and it reminded me i wanted to write a fic about how eddie diaz is in fact secretly a romance fiend who loves love but i never got around to it before

current wip snippet:

“How are you really feeling, Eddie?” she asks. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Eddie hangs his head, letting out a weary sigh, before coming to sit beside her. “Do I have much of a choice?”

“You always have a choice,” Pepa tuts. “Don’t let your parents make you think you don’t.”

“I always knew what my life would be, Tía. This isn’t some cruel twist of fate handed down by the universe. It’s my duty – to my family, to this kingdom.”

“And what about your duty to yourself?” she asks quietly and Eddie looks away.

He takes a moment to rally himself before he can manage to smile at her again. “I’ve gotten everything I want from life already. Christopher is enough. I don’t need anything else.”

Pepa watches him with something that could be pity on anyone else. From her, it’s just an overwhelming sense of empathy and love. She reaches out to pat his cheek and Eddie marvels – as he always does – at the way the casual affection he shares with his aunt and his grandmother never comes as easily with his parents.

“Protect yourself, Eddie,” she murmurs, a quiet request. “Please. For me. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I’ll be fine,” he promises, lifting a hand to cover Pepa’s with his own where it still rests on his cheek. “I’m sure the Buckleys will be more than hospitable.”

tagging @mellaithwen again (to make her write lol 🌸) @elvensorceress again 💕 @fcntasmas @buckactuallys @henswilsons @capseycartwright @hattalove and anyone else who wants to!!

#meme thing #if u would like to ask about any of the wips please do!!!!#mainly bc i'm procrastinating rn and that will distract me lol

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starlsssankt · 2 months

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RE: this gifset

Where do I even begin?

I mean, I'll preface this all with "yes, yes, atrocities committed and countless lives lost and he's a murderous immortal" blah blah blah. I know what the story is trying to say with this character, but bear with me, okay?

One of the things I love about villains/morally grey characters is the reasons behind why they do what they do. I need the nuances, I need the explanations, the whole "why why why" answered. I need to be able to get in their head and reasonably explain the thoughts behind what led to certain actions.

Which is why I cannot STAND it when some shows/books/etc. diminish those complex characters down to one-dimensional "Disney villains". But that's a rant for another day.

When it comes to the Darkling, I think this set shows really well (and it was one of the better scenes done in s2 of the show, let's be honest) how many times he's gone through the same old path, the same old fight, lost more people than anyone can remotely imagine...

I've always head-canoned, of course, that he tried to work "within" the system at first. He tried the peaceful approach, the "let's get more rights for Grisha, let's get them a safe place in society" by whispering in different ears of the nobility/royalty, by trying to orchestrate it as, I don't know, "legally" as he could.

Every single time, it didn't work. It either wasn't enough, or he didn't have the power to truly affect the change he wanted, or whatever the reason, he came to the conclusion that the only language those in current power would understand was VIOLENCE.

(To reference different real life things, you have it with every sort of marginalized group in history, every sort of revolution/rebellion/etc. There are those who work in the "peaceful" way and then those who are more "radical" about it. I firmly believe Aleksander started as the former and after so many (life)times, became the latter.)

The only other being that he knows that is enough like him that he doesn't really fear losing them, is his mother. Until such a point that Alina comes along and ...

Yeah. Another topic for another day.

But even then, ultimately, he does lose Baghra. And in that moment, he feels that overwhelming pressure of being utterly, truly alone. No one else bears what he does, no one else has seen what he has, has endured what he has--so how could they possibly understand?

Of course, after all those lifetimes, of seeing the same thing happening again and again and again-- He cracked, for lack of better words.

I mean, we see in Demon in the Wood how he was as a child, how Grisha lives in general were. Think of any marginalized group in history, and imagine being not only a part of that group, but marginalized even within that group.

That is what he and Baghra endured. Not only were they marginalized because they were Grisha (which dealt with enough prejudice on that fact alone), but they were shadow summoners, which marginalized them even from other Grisha. (Tack on the whole "he's an amplifier" and you get even more distance.)

So of course, after (who knows how many) lifetimes and decades and centuries, after losing friends and lovers and every single person he meets and knows (outside of Baghra) to (and I quote) "sickness, desperation, hate, and time", he's closed himself off from letting anyone in.

What's the point, when he'd just lose them? Why let himself feel anything for anyone else when they'd fall in one way or another, and he'd continue trudging onward...?

And there's the whole "reinvent yourself" aspect he names here, too. Because yes, think about it: He can't just continue in the same line. He has to become an entirely new person. Lies and half-truths that make up one identity after another... To never quite be known by the truth of who you are, to the point even your true name isn't what you're called?

What sort of mess does that do to a person's sense of self? Their identity? He clings to his name tattooed on his heart because he doesn't want to lose who he is-- and I don't even want to think of the mess his head ultimately is in, after doing all of this for literal centuries. (Dude needs major therapy but yeah...)

I mean, has he ever known a moment's peace? Because let's remember:

Grisha (marginalized)

Shadow Summoner (further marginalization within that)

Amplifier (secrets b/c lack of touch, assassination attempts, etc.)

Immortal (literally outlives every single other being save one and then ultimately even does that when Baghra dies)

All those facets of who he is, not a single one of them let him know peace. Prejudiced with some of them by others, literally hunted and killing attempts by others (amplifier)...

I mean, this guy was totally messed up from the get-go. (Again, dude needs major therapy.)

But yeah... ultimately, his intentions were right. And can we really blame him (completely) for shattering after all this? After a past like this? For finally saying "you know what, fuck it. they want a monster, i'll give them a monster to get the result" or whatever.

And I will now end (sort of) this rambling post with the fact that I don't think anyone could have acted the hell out of this character like Ben did. To put forth those nuances and give him depth that even the pages themselves sometimes lacked.

I've said it before and I'll say it one more time here: I love the Grishaverse for a lot of the potential it had. The avenues to really dig in and explore, the nuances and the motifs of light and dark and yin and yang...

I'd kill for some more of that... yeah...

Okay. I'll stop now.

(Sorry this got so long... Oops.)

#headcanon / a name long hidden #about & musings / like calls to like #// it's that time of the night when we decide to RAMBLE about this sort of topic #// forgive the lack of cohesion in this post #// I typed the thoughts as they came to me #// and I did NOT edit #// thank you very much #// long post

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hournites · 1 year

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I did understand the point of the gifset, you were drawing parallels between father and son and of how Jordan relied on love-bombing to convince his son of his newfound peace phylosophy. It's true that he is the narcissistic person here (I'll need an actual fight between them in the finale before officially labeling him as abusive though) so I do agree with you that he manipulated Cameron in that scene. From where my disagreement comes from is that Cameron was groomed to behave similar next. Jordan is faking everything in order to get whatever results he wants and it's why he is saying the right type of things to get reactions not just from his son but also from Barbara and Courtney in their own scenes. He is just repeating the fallacies he's been made to believe by Icicle and getting close to Court was to reassure her he was there on his own and not because anyone else sent him as some kind of Trojan horse. If anything him holding her hand can be seen as a callback to when she grabbed his when he was unsure of everything in 3x04 His unawareness of what is still going on behind his back must be taken into account because his response would be different. And isn't it too late to change now the dynamic when it comes to Camney? A villain origin story needs a proper build up for it to make sense. Had Court failed in 3x04 and never was able to get through him in controlling his powers and Cam just plunged further into the hate and the frustrations he had and never was able to find a way to keep expressing himself artistically through the ice as his auxiliary alternative then I'd agree with you that we were seeing his descend into an evil Icicle Jr. But that hasn't been the journey they've showed us nor the tone of his scenes has matched them. He reconnected with his humanity when Court taught him how to use his emotions (a big theme of S3, see Jennie and Todd) to continue being an artist. Cameron is struggling between the pull between to his family's legacies and the duty he's supposed to answer for (a clan that has been chased for their powers and thus bear anger and hate to the world which Jordan tried to reshape it's way of thinking by force) and the things and people that he loves. I think that ship has already sailed.

The point of the gifset was to demonstrate the uncomfortable and inappropriate use of physical affection and the silencing effect it left on the other party, in how within the same episode Cameron gave what he received. Moving on.

If you agree with me that he manipulated Cameron in that scene, how are you reluctant to labelling it as abuse? Emotional and repetitive psychological damage does not have to present itself in fighting words or physical combat. Most abusive parents do not have superhero fights with their children??? Was not Henry Jr and Henry Sr. an abusive relationship before Henry Sr. murdered his son? (Spoiler alert: It was!!!) As you pointed out, Jordan Mahkent gaslit his ass off the entire episode. Gaslighting and secretly spying on your child is abusive. The entire Mahkent family (Sofus is much more latent than Lily, but it doesn't mean he isn't a participant) has been grooming Cameron. Full stop.

They've been actively training Cameron to become like them and you can see they've been slowly but surely indoctrinating him with their ideology because he is so indifferent to how involved his family is with crime. Could it be that this is his trauma-response? Sure, absolutely, can be. But it still goes to show that he's being socialized to share the Mahkent's worldviews which has and always will be "be charismatic about your atrocities by victim-blaming and making people love you"

Jordan in fact makes that clear here when speaking to Barbara:

This doesn't mean that Cameron is an evil person in episode 3x11. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that he is aware that he's being conditioned this way. But we have to acknowledge that this grooming is alive and present to move forward or else you're going to be stuck here, which is why it's not making sense for you.

His grandparents have made it very hard for Cameron to be influenced by outsiders, and Jordan never makes it sound like he's done anything wrong. He's always painting himself in the right, and so Cameron will also see himself in the right, but that doesn't excuse his behaviour in that it is uprooted from how he's being raised. Courtney was able to see something was VERY fishy about that. It's why she asked him if Jordan had sent that in the first place. Because he sounded like his father. So naturally, Cameron escalating when his words weren't being convincing by initiating physical contact by holding her hands and kissing her is just all the more of Cameron implicitly picking up cues from his father. It doesn't excuse the behaviour, it just explains it.

Now, using this information, you can see how Cameron's villain origin is rooted in every aspect of his interactions in season three, but even beforehand, in which Cameron is going to have to come to terms that he's been gaslit and lied to by virtually everyone he knows. This includes Courtney. Every episode Cameron's behaviour grows more concerning. This is what we in in the business would call “troubling”:

- 2x05 - Cameron acting as though he was entitled to Courtney’s time, guilt-tripping her before they even started dating (I remember at the time a lot of people vocalized on tumblr that his phrasing felt....hmm...)

- 3x02 - Cameron’s sudden fit of anger in the art room

- 3x03 - Cameron’s fit with Ms. Woods // popping Rick’s tire on reflex upon seeing it.

- 3x04 - Screaming out and blasting Courtney across the room (accidental) upon a single touch, but not checking to see if she’s okay later, waiting for Courtney to pull up a chair for him?? Also just absolutely accepting her weird response?? Hmm.

- 3x05 - Cindy provoked him but it lead to Cindy noticing that Cameron was not fully in control, and dropped that he has anger management problems from a young age, which could therefore be a danger to Courtney. She urged Courtney to drop Cameron.

- Post 3x06 - Cameron no longer apologizes for any of his actions. This is a heel-turn as 3x03 and 3x05 Cameron did apologize to Courtney, Ms. Woods, Rick and to the JSA. You know who else doesn’t apologize for their actions, ever? Lily and Jordan.

- 3x09 - All of it.

- 3x10 - Cameron’s tonal shift in the break up scene. The “who did it?” cutting Courtney off as she’s explaining herself. Cameron threatening Courtney to never see her again.

- 3x11 - Cameron’s entire speech on the porch - At the end of the day he justified a double-murder of people that he knew after being so hung-up about another accidental killing that he was ready to kill someone else over it. That’s..Disturbing?? And not okay?? And indicates he’s well on his way to adopting such a way of life just as it had been established he’d been trained (groomed) to do?? And it also indicates that with his visit to Courtney after previously changing his mind, that he’s prone to flip-flopping since he no longer cared that she lied about the Icicle death? And he didn’t tell her that he knew the truth?

In season one, Jordan told Cameron:

And Cameron is taking that and RUNNING with it in 3x11, but the manner in which he’s doing it isn’t healthy (and the context in which Jordan had told the story in which he had killed Christine’s other love interest to get her is also horrible, obviously). Cameron is still modelling his behaviour after his father’s and using his advice. It may seem harmless, but none of this is harmless. Just because Jordan might’ve not told explicitly to Cameron “go visit Courtney” before the porch scene, it doesn’t take away from the fact Jordan’s weaponizing the relationship. Jordan in his position as a supervillain, goes so far as to push Courtney to continue to be with Cameron as he is lying to her. It is uncomfortable. It is manipulative. This is the kind of person Cameron idolizes. He’s soaking it up and squeezing it out, he just doesn’t realize it.

Season 1 Cameron Mahkent and season 3B Cameron Mahkent are virtually two different people.

Journey? ✅

Tone? ✅

To summarize, Courtney did fail. Cameron is WORSE off now post-Courtney’s “help” than he was beforehand. So I’m not sure what you mean that she had connected him to his humanity as if this was a win. 3x06 has not done anything to change or prevent Cameron from spiralling in the way we are actively see him do in 3x09-3x11. This is even sedimented in the musical motifs that they use for him, the increasingly chaotic synths, the ominous undertones to his theme. The way that the quirky cute Camney music is gone now when Camney interacted in 3x11. The Camney dynamic has already changed and the build up for villainous Cameron has been here all along.

Geoff Johns has always written Cameron as a supervillain in literally every project he’s ever used him in. Every iteration of Icicle Jr in television has him disliking his father but still itching to either please him or prove him wrong, but still doing this while being an enemy to the heroes he’s facing and exhibiting concerning social behaviour (even in Young Justice, this is the case, go watch episode “Terrors”, for example). Why? Because that’s his character.

This is when I have to point out, again, that this season was not written to be a final and complete story for the series. The last episode has an alternative ending to leave us without a gigantic cliffhanger, yes, but it doesn’t mean that this entire story arc is supposed to be contained and finished by 3x13. It is clear, just as it is clear with what they’re now doing for Artemis, that they had stories planned for Cameron and Artemis for a season 4 based upon what had been wrongly done to them in this season, giving them motivations to eventually fully embrace opposing the JSA.

Now, just the last sentence.

“Cameron is struggling between the pull between to his family's legacies and the duty he's supposed to answer for (a clan that has been chased for their powers and thus bear anger and hate to the world which Jordan tried to reshape it's way of thinking by force) and the things and people that he loves.”

I’ve been struggling with this. I don’t understand what this is implying. Both of these pulls “the family’s legacy” and “the duty he’s supposed to answer for” are both...bad options? Not to mention, I’m not sure why you’re bringing in the Mahkent persecution angle into this. What duty is Cameron obliged towards? What does he have to answer for? Why is this relevant towards the Mahkents’ behaviour? Minority groups are constantly persecuted. It’s awful. It seems as their story tells, that an entire community of ice-metas or so, have been exiled from Norway, but it’s not the entire community that is resorting to using their powers to exact revenge for their trauma? Unless the Mahkents were the only family to ever survive the exodus...Wouldn’t ice-metas be otherwise have become known world-terrorists? This entire story is an excuse, and it honestly makes me uncomfortable that the Mahkents are using xenophobia as their self-victimization mechanism of choice to further alienate Cameron as to why Jordan does what he does and painting him as a hero to justify their serial killing/mass-removal of agency agenda. Because nothing that Jordan has been doing in this entire show has been fuelled by the persecution of his family members or community...Those are Lily’s reasons, that, yes, have shaped Jordan’s warped vision towards the world. However! That’s not how Jordan’s narrative had been juxtaposed through seasons 1-3?

Jordan’s raison d'être for the ISA’s new plan/American Dream cover up for his murder spree had been to target the anti-ethical corporation that had poisoned Christine through environmental negligence. By having Jordan ask/expect his parents to use the “woe is us, we have been casted aside and stomped upon by society, labelled as monsters” ideology AKA the sociological term of “Othering” to bring Cameron to their side instead of straight up telling him “Oh yeah, well, businessmen’s greed killed your mom! ” simply emphasizes the unnecessary and harmful fabrication of this entire backstory to create the “us vs. them” dichotomy. Oh look! That’s called more grooming.

It’s especially more concerning when Cameron has been raised in an environment that’s been cultivated by Jordan’s carefully manufactured privileged position of power in Blue Valley...Like, y’all, I’m sorry. Jordan is a white man in America who can turn off his freaky powers left and right as he pleases. He’s not scaring anybody until he reveals himself. Every single way they present this story of epic injustice and marginalization to Cameron flops dramatically...It’s just wrong.

There isn’t any real right pull that Cameron must be compelled to follow here that his father and his grandparents are presenting. This “duty” doesn’t exist. He’s not being oppressed by a greater societal force. But we see that he’s still actively engaging and participating in accepting this narrative! Because...again...He’s being groomed.

The things and people that Cameron loves are all parts of the large machine that are going to be churning out a kid with a massive complex. Choosing them doesn’t mean he’s automatically going to live the rest of his life doing the right things. What he has are his lying, hyper-controlling family and the art which has been the chosen method to repress his anger for years. Not to mention, it’s the medium of choice of his mother who was also aligned with the horrible Mahkent ideology. His art teacher was murdered by those people he loves...He has no friends....

Or Courtney, who has participated in feeding him the falsities of his reality and that he has only dated for like...2 weeks? Who he had already broken up with but is trying to convince to throw aside her morals now to be with him which is now making her uncomfortable? And I’m imploring that we remember Courtney’s agency in this situation. If Cameron chooses “love” it does not mean that Courtney must agree to that choice. She is entitled to say no to him. It’s worth mentioning that Barbara said no to Jordan in 1x13 and that’s what made him snap. Courtney should say no to him if he continues to exhibit these behaviours.

Anyway, I’ve said all that I’ve wanted to. The bottom line is that yes, Cameron’s relationship with his father is abusive. No, Cameron very likely doesn’t realize this. Yes, Cameron’s behaviour is increasingly concerning. Yes, he’s learning said behaviours from Jordan + family members who are enabling said behaviour. I still like Cameron, and I’m rooting for him to be both delusional and disillusioned, but I’m not defending him at this point in the game.

#ask #anon #hn talks #character analysis #meta #cameron mahkent

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aceofwhump · 1 year

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A thought just occurred to me. I was looking through the Tumblr trending page today and saw "bisexual" was trending. I scrolled through and saw an interesting infographic on what % of LGBT adults identify as, like 58% bi, 1.3% ace or something, whatever.

I identify as asexual. Way back when, I thought I might be bi because I didn't know what asexual was and, as Jaiden Animations says: zero = zero. I guess I like both, but also neither at the same time?

Anyways, I kept scrolling down on "bisexual" and I start to see like sexy bunny drawings and half naked girls and blah blah. "Sex sells" is completely lost on me. The appeal of boobie pictures or muscular dudes is completely over my head, always has been. I think you, Ace, probably get what I'm talking about here. So, I keep scrolling past thinking "who cares about this shit, literally who would want to look at this? .... Well I guess according to that infographic, like 98.7% of people probably understand this sexy lady crap more than I do". Then I think "whatever, I'm going to go back and look at some whump. There are some LOTR gifs that Ace posted recently that come to mind as well as some super whumpy fanart in my likes. Good shit.

All of this to say: Is how I like to look at, read, watch whump kind of like how people like to look at sexy bunny art? Is "sex sells" kind of like how I watched all of Graceland because you posted a gif of Mike handcuffed on the bed going through withdrawal? I completely understand "whumperflies" I caught the whumperflies from a single gif enough to watch that entire show, which I had never even heard of until seeing that gif. I got completely sucked into the Sonic fandom because of a collection of screenshots of Sonic carrying Tails. It happened to me with Teen Wolf, Outlander, others? (Now that I think about it your blog got me to watch a bunch of shows I don't think I normally would, so thanks!)

Is this somewhat what allo folks experience? Is whumperflies akin to sexual attraction in a way? I do wonder and I never thought about it this way until today.... I'm curious of your thoughts on this, Ace?

I also know that a large chunk of the whump community also identifies under the asexual umbrella so if anyone else has opinion?

Hi nonny!

Lol yeah I too do not understand the sex sells thing in society. I look at commercials like that one Rally's burger one where it's just a half naked woman sitting on a car eating a burger and I'm like "how does this shit work on anyone? Why would this make anyone want to eat a burger??" It genuinely makes no sense to me. But this is actually a theory I've seen once before on here! That our interest in whump/whumperflies is our version of "sexual attraction" which is definitely very interesting. I can see the connection very easily and there definitely are a lot of similarities in the feelings. I do wonder if how we feel whumperflies is how allos feel when they experience sexual attraction but who knows lol. Personally in my brain the two things are separate and I like to keep them separate. I don't like thinking of my whumperflies or my interest in whump as a sort of replacement for sexual attraction. Just feels super weird to me to think of it that way. I don't feel sexual attraction so I don't know what that feels like but I do have a sex drive and feel arousal and it's never happened with anything related to whump and it feels physically different to me than my whumperflies so it's all been kept separate for me. Just my own feelings though!

The sex sells/whump gifs thing is SO INTERESTING! I never thought about that but yeah you're right! For us it's definitely "whump sells" and not "sex sells" lol. Nothing gets me to watch a show faster than a good whumpy gifset lol. Sex? Sexy poses? Absolutely nothing for me. Actually it's much more a turn off than anything. Whump? Hot damn sign me up. I'll watch the whole damn thing for whump. Sidenote I love that you watched all of Graceland because of my mass posting lol.

It's fascinating and a very interesting theory for sure! Totally okay if others feel differently. Like you said there are a lot of aspec whumpers so I think there's definitely something to the theory. I don't know though! Very interesting idea!

#mod replies #ask #asexual whumpers #whump community #asexual #whump and asexuality

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suuho · 10 months

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hiii friend i hope you are doing well! i was wondering if i could ask for meta analysis of this (https://www.tumblr.com/suuho/708647383291002880/vincenzo-2021-sending-my-love-from-the-other) edit you made? like what the lyric meant to you in relation to the gifs/vincenzo and han seo, and like those lyrics mean to vincenzo about han seo; if they are about them?

this is silly and you don’t have to answer ofc heh!! i just adoreee that edit and think about it all the time heh the vincenzo community needed it heh. thank u sm!!!

hi!! i'm hanging in there, i hope you're well too!! sorry that this took a few days to answer but i had work, and also i wanted to take my time and answer this properly because that's what an analysis should be. fair warning, i haven't had that much sleep so i hope any of this makes sense, and it's also been a minute since i've made that set. (read more cause very long)

so, the edit in question. funnily enough, i pretty much knew i wanted to make this set in some capacity since that song by fall out boy was released (great song, btw) and it took a little while to formulate those thoughts into something coherent, and then to actually sit down and make that gifset. most of the stuff i make i have a vague idea of what it's supposed to look like, but this one surprised me with the overlays and the blending; i didn't expect it to look like that in the end, but i love the colors and i love it for what it is. vinzenco is obviously coded in blue and hanseo in orange/yellow, and i purposely did that. i think, hanseo's death was such an impactful moment in the show, even more than the death of vincenzo's mother, because up until then, we had watched hanseo go through heavy, positive character development, and as a viewer, that makes you root for him. actually, we have been made to root for him way earlier in the show, when we find out hanseo is a victim of abuse by his own older brother (who turns out to not be a goofy paralegal, so in that sense, they have turned the tables narratively on what jang brother to sympathize with), and is willing to change.

i think a lot of hanseo's conflict and character boils down the fact that his abuser is his own brother, someone he is conditioned to love by societal pressures and norms, and that he knows he should love in a familial way, and that he finds himself clinging to because it is all he has left of his family. he has nowhere else to go, no way out, until he meets vincenzo. it is hard to escape an abuser, and the fact that hanseo manages to do so by his own will, and with vincenzo's help, only to in the end die by the hands of his brother anyways? god, that is so tragic. that is why his death hurts so much more than the others in the show. anyways, i am digressing somewhat.

but! the edit in question. the first gif is pretty obvious in relation to the second: i wanted to show a moment in hanseo's life in which he was truly happy, a moment he spent with vincenzo. has vincenzo ever allowed himself an affection like that towards anyone? to hanseo, of course, vincenzo fills a role that has been misappropriated his entire life: the part of hyung, a big brother role that hanseok never managed to remotely tend to in the way he should have. hanseo does not have any hyungs in his life, he doesn't have someone he can trust like that, that he can love like that (i won't deny that i am a hanseo/vincenzo enthusiast because i do love them together, and i do not think of them as ~brothers in that sense, but as a mere narrative tool, that is the position vincenzo fills for hanseo in his life and in the show).

i wish we would have seen more of their quiet moments together, because i think they both gave each other something they had been missing until then.

the middle gif, of course. god, when will that scene not hurt like hell. that is more in relation to the caption and the gif after. in vincenzo's life and in the mafia, there is only way to avenge, and that is an eye for an eye. blood for blood. but the fact that vincenzo chose the cruelest punishment for hanseok specifically? that is purely motivated by the loss of hanseo. what would you trade the pain for? vincenzo chose a knife. and what did hanseo trade the pain for? a glimpse of happiness. if you are dead by the end of the story, you are dead at the beginning of it. that's how it works.

if you look at the song in general, i just love how it speaks to the both of them.

especially the pre-chorus but more so this entire first part of the song is so hanseo for me. the city always hangs a little bit lonely on me, loose / like a kid playing pretend in his father's suit. think about the starched-white shirts and high collars he wears, partly to hide the bruising of the abuse, partly like an armor, and how he lets go of it when he is around vincenzo. hanseo is quite literally playing pretend in his own life; he is controlled by his brother who continuously drills into him that he won't amount to anything, that he is stupid, that he is worthless. but hanseo is neither stupid nor worthless; he is smart, can think on his feet, is mechanically gifted. he is funny. he laughs the way someone laughs who's surprised by his own, actual laugh because he hasn't heard it in so long. his real laugh, not some approximation of it.

model house life meltdown still a modern dream letdown, it kills me / you know i'm dying out here / what would you trade the pain for? if you are dead at the end of the story, you are dead at the beginning of it. i think, hanseo is aware that he is slowly dying as a victim of his circumstances, figuratively and literally. which is what makes him reckless enough to even seek out vincenzo. a lot of hanseo's life is lived with the desperation of a dead man walking.

that bridge is such a gut-wrencher, my god. but this is the part that i find speaks more broadly to vincenzo. like i said, the loss of hanseo is what ultimately made him take a deliberately cruel, downright mortifying approach to his vengeance, to his punishment. and you were the sunshine of my lifetime / what would you trade the pain for? is obviously more in relation to vinzenco's relationship with hanseo. at least, in the intent of this set.

that goes hand in hand with i saw you in a bright-clear field, hurricane heat in my head / the kind of pain you feel to get good in the end, good in the end. that is just, exactly the scene when vinzenco confronts hanseok the last time, and remembers hanseo. whew. my god. what a gut punch.

other than that, i mostly just wanted the set to go from light to dark, because i think killing hanseok the way he did was in many ways a breaking point for vincenzo, hence all the shadows he finds himself in, and the fact that hanseo's death is the reason for it? absolutely insane. give up what you love before it does you in. vinzenco couldn't give it up, not even the memory of hanseo, and so he let it kill a part of hinself as well. he chose the knife to trade for the pain. anyways. i hope that was somehow helpful for you! thank you so much for your question!

#if you have more questions just ask me!#ask #anon

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calliopecalling · 2 years

Text

QOTS Rewatch - 3x11 - Diez de Copas

This episide is NOTHING BUT PAIN. It's one of the most painful episodes of the entire series to me. I did not enjoy rewatching it 😂 Even though I know it all turns out okay it's like--this episode is where it really starts to tank for Teresa. I mean I guess 3x10 really was where it started to tank and this is the one where the tanking accelerates and really shows how bad it's going to be. I don't like it. I don't like watching her suffer, or James suffer; I don't like seeing her past coming back to haunt her in a way that it is so damaging to herself and her happiness. It's just so painful and not the pain of 2x11 or 2x12 either, where it's so hard watching her walk away from James and then watching James walk away from her but you can still admire her strength. In this episode though, it's almost like her strength is exactly what gets in her own way and it's not something to admire, but more to pity, or even (if you're a less generous person towards her than I am, lol) to resent. Like maybe if she were a little softer, she wouldn't have isolated herself away from James so devastatingly. But... that's not who she is. Not at this point in her trajectory.

Soooo because it's so painful, I'm genuinely going to try to keep this shorter than usual. I've said most of what I want to say about it in gifset tags already and I'll just rehash a few of them here in one place. I don't even want to go through my usual bullet list of basic series of events in the episode because IT HURTS OKAY.

So here's the first thing I want to say about the terrible pain.

I BLAME KELLY ANNE AND POTE.

Seriously. Kelly Anne may be a pitiable creature and surely she's not "strong" in the way Teresa is strong but for her to sit there, James having outed her as the mole, and try to insist to Teresa that her feelings for James were blinding her? Fuuuuuuuck no ma'am. She was definitely put in a terrible position by Devon so I could've forgiven her for falling for his bullshit, even though it almost got Teresa killed. But I can't forgive her for sitting there trying to blame James, and Teresa's feelings for James. (If she hadn't lied so egregiously to Teresa there, I think Teresa might've actually spared her, too.) It's just a whole other layer of appalling. As Teresa says to her: "I trusted you. I don't trust anyone." 😭 First horrible thing about this episode then: it makes Teresa--the one who has already admitted to not being able to trust people--even less likely to trust anyone.

And Pote. FUCKING POTE. Pote is just not smart. He is muscle. He does not deserve to be involved in any strategizing or for Teresa to seek his counsel in any serious matters. I feel like it should've been fairly easy for him (but it obviously wasn't) to use his rational brain, the one that Teresa doesn't have access to because she's in trauma response mode, to be like hmm, let's see, there are numerous people around who might have access to Teresa. Yes, James is one. So is Kelly Anne. So is Charger. So is Lil T. Taza. Etc. Not that I want to go around pointing fingers at innocents, but Pote needed to use his rational brain to be like, hmmm, James is Mr. Loyalty himself, so does it really make sense for him to be the mole? Or at least, does it make any more sense for it to be him than any of the others?

I mean: the surface answer here is yes, it does make more sense for it to be James. I think their assumption is that the mole would have to be someone in the inner circle and would have to be someone really smart and really skilled at deception. Obviously James meets two of those three qualities, and if he were the mole, he would've clearly been really skilled at deception, too. But as I said in my tags on this gifset, rationally, it just doesn't add up for James to be the mole. James has consistently displayed that loyalty is his number one value. Above all else, he has integrity with respect to his sense of duty and honor to the person he serves. This is why (as I interpret what the source material has to say about the original tracker issue) he ultimately used the tracker on Teresa in season 2--because he worked for Camila, and Camila ordered him to track Teresa down. As soon as he did, he resigned, because he couldn't any longer reconcile working for a woman whose enemy was the woman he'd accidentally fallen in love with. And then he showed up to work with Teresa and everything he's ever said on the matter just reinforces how important loyalty is to him. (It also makes me remember his comment to Guero in 2x06, "you have no idea what loyalty is.")

So for Teresa and Pote to suspect him of being the mole, they are going wildly out of character in their interpretation of James, lol. For Teresa, it's an emotional hot button issue. She sees the tracker in Bolivia and all her alarm bells go off. I can't blame her for that. But I think she did start to back off it, I think she did realize she was wrong (like in the car scene with Pote, waiting for James to show up to their trap) and yet Pote dug in his heels. Pote who had allll the same information Teresa did and yet who couldn't possibly fathom anyone other than James would be capable of betraying Teresa. Pote who sneered at Teresa for sleeping with James as he blames her for being blind to what she was letting into her bed. Fuck off, Pote. And the worst part is he never apologizes. Not to Teresa, not to James. Not even slightly. Not even a sign of remorse to Teresa! For digging in his heels and insisting it must have been James and thereby throwing a major wrench in Jeresa's personal relationship.

To Teresa's credit, though, she at least apologizes, to James. I'll talk more in the 3x12 meta and gifset reblog tags about her feelings and why she can't just open all the way up to James at this point, but I feel like at the end of 3x11 she feels so heavy with what she's put him through that she honestly just believes him that he wants space. I can't imagine really that James wouldn't have forgiven her pretty fast--after all, he knows what her trauma is (at least a lot of it, if not all of it) and he knows she has trust issues, partly due to all the trauma and partly due to her relationship history (*cough Guero cough*). He must understand that getting almost killed because of a mole would be enough to severely unnerve anyone and force them to look at the people they actually do trust the most and see them differently. And he loves her so much I don't think he could possibly hold a grudge (in fact I suspect he already knows he's going to have to go with Devon at this point). But yeah... for the moment, at least, he needs space. He's hurt, and understandably so. And she is not only feeling remorse for having doubted him, but is obviously also grieving Kelly Anne (and assuming he just killed her on top of everything else). So there'll be more angst and pain next episode with all of her trying in various ways to get him to stay while still holding back a little.

Just gonna end this with a gif of that kiss, because that kiss is such a sweet, gentle, achingly tender moment if you strip away all the context. Please get back to this ASAP guys. Even though I know you won't 😭😭😭

Ok I thought I was done but I just want to say one more thing. James told her on the balcony at the end of the episode that she should've come to him first. I actually disagree with him here. I don't really understand how she was supposed to "talk to James first" if he was a candidate for being the mole… because if he WAS the mole, it would've made everything since his return to Malta a lie, and thus talking to him first would've been stupid. She was in no way trying to be duplicitous with him. She felt genuinely afraid. But at the same time there was the part of her that knew it couldn't be him, and this part of her also didn't want him to know that she suspected him, because she knew how badly it would hurt him. She was just all twisted up in knots. And their relationship is so new--and she told him she couldn't trust people--I mean how much clearer could she be? Did he deserve her trust? ABSOLUTELY. But is it understandable that she thought, yikes if he's the mole, we need to be super careful? Yes. I mean, James is a dangerous, dangerous person.

What do I think Teresa should have done? Honestly... I don't really know. I really don't. I have been thinking about it all week and I still don't. If he were the mole, then telling him she knew there was a mole and suspected him--the communication he was asking for--could have been extremely dangerous. The whole thing about a mole is that it destabilizes any kind of trust because a mole is by its sheer existence unpredictable, dangerous, untrustworthy. And James would've understood that. So I guess what he's upset about is that there was even any question at all in her mind that it might've been him. Yeah, that's super painful for a man who is deeply in love with her and has been showing her that in all the ways he can find ever since he found her in Malta. And given what we know of James and loyalty, I think they should have been way more certain than they were (they being Pote and Teresa) that he had nothing to do with it. But 100% certainty? Man. I just don't think that would've been smart, either, not for someone with so many potential enemies out there.

Okay that really wraps it up. I thought this was going to be short, but it is actually impossible for me to keep things short, so my sincere apologies.

#queen of the south #qots #qots s3 #3x11 #2021 rewatch #txt post #qots reaction post #qots meta #the other big thing in this episode is Camila going down #Loya confesses that he was playing her and tries to get her to become a witness for the DEA #literally the way trust plays out for them is opposite and parallel #Camila puts too much trust in both men who surround her this season and ends up getting played by both of them #(meanwhile she herself is manipulative and calculating and untrustworthy)#and Teresa doesn't put enough trust in James #which ends up hurting her in a different but ultimately equally damaging way #anyway Camila's story finally gets interesting to me again next episode #because it intersects again with Teresa's yayyy

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fkevin073 · 2 years

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I'm staying anonymous for now.

This is because of this post (post/668044585142992896/since-that-gifset-of-nick-yesterday-and-your) that I'm overly thinking details like this again. So my scattered thoughts might not make sense to you.

And I will take you ahead of time, I never meant to write this message to be a long message. But my thoughts are always this scattered a lot of the time when I'm thinking about characters, plots, stories, things..

I've watched and rewatched Fear Street movies a few times, and I will watch it again because why not watch horror movies for Halloween.

And if I'm honest... I enjoyed the movies more that I actually thought I would have. Which is saying a lot from me. But there are some details that bothered me, obviously the continuation errors really bother me.

I don't know if I'm the only one with that problem. But I also wish that there more depth to the characters, the plot, the story, to everything.. The acting was fine. The special effects were fine. Things were fine.

I wanted more depth, even just a little more depth.

Like before Nick Goode knew about his family tradition (the Pact), he genuinely seemed like a sweetheart who never discriminated against anyone for their differences. Including Shadysiders. That's the way I'd view his character. He was a sweetheart who wanted to help anyone - like Ziggy - in any way he could. And if I'm honest, I'm not sure if Nick was already crushing on Ziggy at that point. Or if he just didn't want a person to be constantly harassed, and almost killed, for petty reasons like everyone kept doing to Ziggy. Ziggy was just blamed because she was the only Shadysider in those situations whenever counselors had been involved. But, then again, the viewers never really see Nick even interacting with any other Shadysiders besides Ziggy. So I'm not even really sure if Nick's sweet spot was only for Ziggy, or for anyone else if they got to know the real him. Not his family name, not his reputation or his status. The real him as himself. Maybe I'm overly thinking this.

Nick told Ziggy that he's never wanted to be a part with the traditions of his family like the Pact, and tried finding ways to talk himself out of doing the ritual. The viewers never thought the Goode family was this evil family, until the reveal in 1666. But the scene with Ted Sutherland as the teenage Goode men, as Nick, he does really list Thomas Slater. But when he listed Tommy as a name, that happened before he really talked to Ziggy. Because Tommy was killing people during the scenes of Nick and Ziggy kissing, they heard screaming in that moment. And that was when Nick's fate was sealed. But he did try saving people, as many people that he could find. And he was traumatized by the death he did witness, he even got sick over what he saw. Either... Nick never didn't believe the Pact was actually real, or maybe he never thought a situation like that would have never lead to killing dozens of people all at once like that. I don't know. I don't really know if his fate was sealed when he listed a name on the wall, or when he wish to resurrect Ziggy back to life. And I've had similar thoughts as you. After you find out all the antagonizes were actually the Goode family, maybe Nick was also trying to find ways to redeem himself in some way or another but the situations always kept getting worse rather than better. But I wonder.. Do you think he lost his entire soul from the '78 Nightwing Massacre, or do think he kept losing pieces of his soul whenver he added names to the wall for another massacre. A thought that comes to mind a lot.

The Goode father was dead. Nick and Will weren't being controlled by their father anymore. So Nick didn't have to keep that tradition going.

There are details that I always wish was explained more in depth - the minor and major details that weren't elaborated on in the movies, and especially the audience who never read the books or don't remember those details in the books. I know they altered a a few details though.

Like for the Witchcraft, the black magic. Obviously the witchcraft was a part of the Goode family since 1666 because of Solomon Goode did use the magic book, which was passed down for many generations.

How did the Goode father die? So I know not many people care about the father of Nick and Will, but I'm kinda curious to know how he died though. Even if his death might not be an interesting death either.

Did any of the females, like mothers and sisters, know about the Pact in the family. Or only the males. I know, I know.. People have theories.

Just about any and every detail of the plot that was elaborated on are the same details I'm overly thinking about, whether or not the details are interesting. Whether or not the details are major and minor details to the viewers of the movies. Even if the details are to the plot.

I'm just overly thinking through with scattered thoughts right now. And, I know that I keep saying that, but that's how my mind is for me.

ah no this is so great! the great thing about this trilogy is the characters. the must frustrating thing about this trilogy is also the characters, Nick in particular.

The thing that guts most people about Nick is the potential he had. To be better. To forsake the curse. Because Nick obviously had a lot of feelings for Ziggy and knew what he was doing was wrong, but he did it anyway. He succumbed to the curse and his privilege, even if he didn't necessarily seem happy about it based on how he looked when he said Tommy's name.

LOL in my head canon Nick had a crush on Ziggy for a really long time and only found the courage during that summer because of what he decided to do.

I've talked a lot about this with other people - like Nick's intention with the curse, because he was trying to save people and he was frolicking around with Ziggy shortly beforehand. To me, he did know it was real, even if he didn't want it to be. He got close to Ziggy because he wanted to make sure she was okay, even if that epically failed and he was a complete idiot about all of it. the thing about Nick is that he has some humanity in him, especially when it comes to Ziggy. Maybe he didn't want the curse to be real, but he knew it was deep down (in my mind). He just tried to justify his reasoning to himself and was weak.

In my mind, Nick lost a major chunk of his soul when he turned his back on Ziggy at Nightwing. When she pushed him away. Nick in 1994 and Nick in 1978 are two very different people. Nick when he puts Ryan's name on the wall is so much more of an asshole than Nick when he put Tommy (though obviously he's still awful either way). Part of my frustration with this trilogy is that Nick totally becomes a textbook moustache twirling villain in 1994 after he holds Ziggy hostage. Like his whole speech to Deena? totally lacking in nuance. He was just straight up evil. And while some people are like that (Nick’s dad was totally a creep), it was disappointing that they reduced his character so much especially because they’d shown him as a more nuanced character in 1978.

There’s been a lot of debate on how the curse actually worked because the film implies that the first born son kind of automatically inherits the burden? Like the devil ensures that the cycle continues by each Goode having a son and so on. The son doesn’t know until they’re like 17 or something and then they’re told. But if that’s the case - how much free will do they have? Does the heart disappear after the Goode heir dies and then reappears when the curse is renewed? It’s very unclear because the wall has the names when Nick says Tommy and his dad is dead by then. When Nick dies in 1994, it all disappears, so the nuances of the curse are very unclear.

In my head canon, Joseph Goode (Nick’s dad) died from a sudden heart attack or other accident as a final fuck you from satan, though I know other people have different ideas on how Joseph bit the dust which are so fun.

In terms of the females though, people have looked at the Goode family tree and there were barely any females born. Like it’s sons and sons and sons. In my opinion, I think the Goode matriarch’s knew something was up, but maybe not the full details. Same with Will. I like the idea of the curse being something solely thrust on the shoulder’s of the first born son, and so he’s very isolated from the family afterwards.

lol so sorry for the long reply but let me know what you think! always fun discussing this stuff.

#nick x ziggy #ziggy x nick #nick goode #ask

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okami-zero · 1 year

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So saw a gifset of Alexstrasza in Dragonflight, and she looks so freaking pretty. Like, a lot of the visuals have come along by leaps and bounds. And as neat as all the new stuff is... Like, I was excited when it came out, was kind of building into my hype... and then I remembered Shadowlands. And to a lesser extent, BfA. And I just... can't. The story went fucking sidewise in BfA, and then Shadowlands just kind of threw everything out the window to the point a novel had to be written to make sense of a MAJOR PLOTPOINT. Actually, no, more like a major plot THROUGHLINE, because it informed the shit that went down in BfA, too. And, since it impacted the game, it should have been IN. THE. GAME. And nothing came of any of any of it (except robbing some excellent villains of their agency, which was bullshit)! The novel came out after the fact and while I hear it is good, a retroactive fix is not enough to get me back in. Besides, I had stopped playing in...June? Of 2021 - none of my former guildmates or other friends were ever online while I was on (the guild kind of just...faded away halfway or so through BfA) and pugging in WoW is absolute bullshit. I managed to do...one dungeon, I think? Managed to snag a friend to heal, and while we are doing this run, my very first tanking run of this dungeon, one of the DPS tried to vote to kick me because I wasn't facepulling. And that is a WHOLE OTHER RANT, right there. I digress.

However, that does not mean that my WoW characters are gone or have stopped. Especially my main, Xanotos, who has existed very nearly *as long as WoW itself*, in one form or another and on various servers. He, his partner and my rogues' gallery of other various characters are now RP-only, existing in chat RPs and in a neat little private server that is primarily RP. Like, no combat stuff at all.

For me, Legion was the neat little bow that tied off pretty much all of Warcraft 3's loose ends (despite the absolute twaddle in ads about Shadowlands being the end, fuck you new writing team). The folks I poke around with kind of pick at BfA for the good bits and leave the rest out and we kind of ignore Shadowlands. But yea, Xano is still going, doing his thing in Azeroth, albeit not in the main line.

And, like, maybe someday, they'll do something that might get me to look at the game again, but the taint from Shadowlands BS and to a lesser extent, BfA just...no. Y'all shat all over 15+ years of lore and didn't even manage to give a satisfying end (or memorable villain) for the effort. So Xano is not gone, and most certainly not forgotten.

My focus right now is FFXIV and Akagi and that is where most of my energy and focus lie. But The Beast of the Black Wald is still kicking and there are plenty of tales I need to tell with him.

And I will not yuck anyone's yum here. If you are hype about Dragonflight, please enjoy it! I'll not decry what is fun for you, just because I don't enjoy it anymore. And don't let anyone else naysay you, either. Get out there and fuck up whatever bad dudes show up! For the Alliance, For the Horde, For Azeroth.

#okami rambles #wow rambles #I did my best to keep this from becoming a rant #I have ranted in circles about my dissatisfaction with the game's story #And for now i need to get back to Eorzea

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