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imtryingbuck · 7 months

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Affair Part 2

~ gif not mine credit goes to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader, Fem!Reader x ??

Summary: The aftermath of reader telling Bucky she’s divorcing him

Word count: 3157

Warnings: Bucky is a big huge gigantic humongous dumdum. Swearing, if there’s more let me know.

Translation: милая девушка - beautiful girl. ангел - angel.

Masterlist

Part 1

“I filed for divorce” kept playing on his mind for the rest of the night long after she had gone to bed. His phone kept going off nonstop, the messages and missed calls all from Sharon.

He stayed at the home he shared with his wife and children for four hours waiting, hoping his beautiful wife who he betrayed would come back down the stairs and tell him she forgave him.

It never happened.

He left, getting into the car his wife brought him, the same car he fucked his mistress in and went straight to Sharon’s. Knocking on the door he only had to wait for a few minutes before the wooden door came swinging open.

“You finally showed, I’ve been waiting for ages! We need to talk” Sharon stands there, red eyed as if she had been crying.

“She’s divorcing me” Walking past her and looking around the room he’d been in so many time before - double date nights, just seeing his best friend, cheating on his wife with his best friend’s wife.

“He’s divorcing me too” Her voice was happier than his. “Now we can be together, I had to cry in front of Steve pretending I cared. Then you wouldn’t pick up your phone I wa-”

“I don’t want you Sharon. I want Y/n. I want my children and my best friend back. Me and you biggest mistake I have ever made!” Cutting her off.

“You’re joking right? We are so perfect together not me and Steve and especially not you and that bitch!”

“Don’t. Don’t you dare call my wife a bitch” he seethes.

“Don’t act like you care now Bucky where was that caring nature of yours when you was sleeping with me for 8 months? And news flash she’s divorcing you she’s not going to get back with you!”

Having her remind him of the stone cold truth hit him in the gut. Sharon was right, his wife was divorcing him. She was never going to get back together with him.

“I don’t care if she’s divorcing me just don’t call her a bitch.”

“Okay, how about we don’t talk about them two okay? Here’s what I was thinking, I’m getting the house in the divorce so I’ll just sell it and me and you can get an apartment together? We can buy all new furniture and it can be a fresh start for us and oh I’ve already found -“.

As Sharon stands there rambling on he had the urge to ring his wife and tell her she was wrong. Sharon did want him now that they were divorcing, she’s even planned to sell her house so they can get an apartment together. Y/n was wrong about that Sharon and himself couldn’t run off into the sunset and live happily ever after because he stood there with his mistress in front of him and having to hear her rambling off about their new future together.

His wife who he loves more than anything in this world was wrong.

Because it wasn’t Sharon that didn’t want him now their affair was known to their spouses. It was him. He was the one that didn’t want her, he didn’t want the apartment with Sharon, he didn’t want a fresh start with his best friends soon to be ex-wife. No, he wanted his wife back. He wanted a fresh start with Y/n so he can get a second chance of being better. He wanted the love of his life back, and he wanted Steve back - he knew himself that Steve wouldn’t forgive him for his part of her affair.

“-Bucky? Bucky are you even listening to me?” Sharon’s voice cut his inner monologue off.

“Huh? Oh yeah sorry”

“You wasn’t listening was you? It’s okay silly bum I was just talking about an apartment I found the other day, oh Buck it’s beautiful and I honestly think it would be perfect for us” Her voice was hopeful and excited. He found himself comparing her voice to the one belonging to his wife when she found the house that became their home.

“Sharon this isn’t going to work”

“Of course it will, I love you and you love me”

“No Sharon I don’t. I don’t love you, I will always love Y/n”

“No! No you don’t James! You love me!” Sharon screamed at him.

Sighing “Listen Sharon I don’t love you, I never had. I have never been attracted to you-“

“Never been attracted to me? You’re joking right?”

“No”

“You prick!”

“We wouldn’t work anyway Sharon. You cheated on Steve with me and I cheated on Y/n with you. We would always accuse each other, we wouldn’t be happy I can promise you that”

“N-no you wouldn’t cheat on me though!”

“I cheated on my WIFE! You really think I wouldn’t do it to you? I love her for Christ sake, she’s the only person I have ever been attracted to! When I was fucking you I was thinking of her! C’mon Sharon don’t be so stupid, it doesn’t suit you” He’s only now regretting coming over here, at the time he didn’t know where else he could go.

“Yo-you ruined my marriage James” he watched her struggle to breathe for a moment “you ruined my marriage!”

“No I didn’t, you did. You are the one that made a vow to Steve not me. Like how I ruined my marriage with Y/n not you.”

“You-we made love James”

“We fucked. We didn’t make love Sharon” rolling his eyes at her petty attempt at making him change his mind.

“I-don’t-you don’t want me now? But you did earlier? You fucked me in your car, went home and get confronted by your wife, then you come here and tell me you don’t want me anymore? Is that what you’re trying to tell me right now?” Her anger and tears were on full display.

“I’m sorry. I am. It’s just I love Y/n more than anything. I’m going to go; I’ll see you around I guess” he was just about to touch the door handle when her voice stopped him.

“Fuck me one last time. Please James”.

And ever the fool, he did.

~~~

The months after she told him she had filed for divorce she flourished, no more crying herself to sleep, no more fake smiles and no more faking confidence. She was the happiest she had been since she caught her husband fucking a woman that was most definitely not her. Her and Steve’s friendship grew too, they became closer than ever. They were each other’s shoulder to cry on, they supported one another when they needed it.

But then came their divorce to being finalised, and that’s where Y/n struggled.

Nat had forced convinced her to go and see a therapist, Dr Grey was a lovely woman who didn’t care about telling her to stop putting herself down, happily called her stupid when she blamed herself for the affair. Dr Grey - Linda as she told Y/n to call her - became a good friend, a friend she needed and wanted.

In the aftermath of her divorce she became isolated, she didn’t want to see or hear anyone that wasn’t her children. Sam being the best friend that he is, would pick up the kids and take them to school and drop them back off. Nat would go to the shops and sometimes even cook them dinner. She felt like she was causing problems for Nat and Sam because they were spending so much time running around after her that they couldn’t spend any time together.

“Don’t be stupid Y/n. You know me and Sam love you, we are more than happy to help” Nat spoke one night when they were lying in bed together.

“I feel like I’m causing problems and I don’t want you two to argue becau-“

“Y/n stop! You’re not causing problems and we are not arguing, like at all. You know Sam loves them kids of yours, he actually loves taking them to school because and I quote ‘they make me feel cool’” both women chuckle at the red heads husband “so stop милая девушка, we are both here for you, I promise”

She cried herself to sleep most nights, cried for the loss of her marriage - for weeks she would find herself going to play with the ring that use to sit on her fourth finger only for her to look down and only see a fading white tan line. Signing her maiden name not married one took months to engrain as she was just so use to writing Barnes after her name. She would find herself reaching out to the other side of the brand new double sized bed searching for his warmth, always finding it empty, always leaving her feeling alone and cold.

She cried the loss of her friendship with Sharon. They had been friends for nearly three years prior to Sharon introducing her and Bucky to each other. She was the first person Y/n would phone whenever something good and bad happened, she was actually the first person to know Y/n was pregnant with her oldest child - hell it was Sharon that told her she was pregnant as she couldn’t bring herself to look at it. Y/n was always there for Sharon night or day she was there. The pain of her betrayal was almost more unbearable than Bucky’s.

Her mental and physical health took a toll too. Constantly blaming herself for not being enough for him, blaming herself for being tired sometimes to not have sex with him. Blaming herself was so much easier and safer for her than to blame the two people who hurt her. Her weight loss was concerning to Nat and Sam, although she would find herself hungry she just couldn’t stomach anything. Nat cleaned the house whilst Sam took the kids to the park as Y/n had a shower for the first time in nearly a month, she felt like she could conquer the world all because she showered, washed her hair and shaved.

Then she accepted the divorce. She accepted that she was no longer someone’s wife, she even (more dramatically) accepted that she’d be single for the rest of her life. With the help from Linda she accepted that Bucky’s affair was not her fault.

~~~

It had now been two years since they were officially divorced.

Y/n made a friend at work, Peggy. Beautiful, kind and the sweetest person. She had set her up with Steve to help him get himself back out there, they’d been dating for nearly a year. Y/n couldn’t believe how much happier he looked now, she was happy for him truly she was. She believed he deserved it.

Dating for her was, well….

“You’re absolutely glowing ангел” Nat whistled as Y/n walked into the kitchen.

“Stop flirting with me”

“I can’t help it милая девушка”

“Sam come and get your wife!”

“What’s going on?” Sam asks coming to where the women were, placing a kiss on Y/n’s temple then giving Nat a quick kiss.

“Your wife keeps flirting with me”

Wiggling his eyebrows “well things can be arranged”

“Samuel!” Both women scold him but shortly after burst out laughing.

“No but I was telling her that she was glowing” Nat informed.

“You are, you seem happier as well” Sam agreed.

“Well… ikindofmetsomeone”

“What!” Both Sam and Nat shout in unison.

“I met someone..”

“Who?” When? Where? How?” Y/n rolled her eyes at the pair talking in tandem.

“His name is Ari. I literally bumped into after I ran out of the cafe after setting Steve and Peggy up on their date”.

“Is he good to you?”

“Yeah, and he’s great with the kids”

“Wait…he’s met the kids?”

“Yeah it was an accident, James said he couldn’t take the kids because of work and Ari came to pick me up for our date but ended up staying at mine. The kids love him”.

“I can’t wait to meet him!” Nat smiles.

~~~

Bucky hadn’t seen Sharon after he left the next morning, he felt ashamed and guilty for sleeping with her. For some bizarre reason he thought it would be a great idea to go to Nat and Sam’s to talk to Steve.

“Absolutely not. You’re not coming in Buck”

“Please Sam I know he’s here, I jus- I just need to talk to him”

“About what? Jesus Bucky you were having an affair with his wife!”

“I know I just need to apologise” He heard movement behind Sam, when he saw Steve’s pained expression his heart sank.

“I don’t want to hear any apologies. But you will listen to me.” Steve gives Sam a small nod, stepped further out of the doorway. “I have known you since we were kids and not once have I ever not trusted you. Not once have an ever wanted to punch you as much as right now. But.. but I’m not going to, it’s not worth it. You betrayed me man! You knew how much I loved her! And there’s Y/n, you had this perfect woman and you cheated on her!” Slightly shaking his head “you-you had the perfect family and you fucked it up by fucking my wife! I was always jealous of you, did you know that? Sharon never wanted kids so when you told me Y/n was pregnant I was jealous. You two had this perfect relationship whilst me and her were arguing all the time, I was jealous” swallowing hard and taking a deep breath “but you see James as much as I wanted the life you had I would of never and I mean never of done what you have done!”

Bucky stands there with tears rolling down his cheeks, wanting to say something but the words just wouldn’t come out.

“You know when Y/n told me about the affair she couldn’t stop apologising, couldn’t stop crying, she even puked up. I had to calm your wife down trying to reassure her that what you did wasn’t her fault! And where were you huh? Screwing my wife!” Chuckling lightly to himself. “Me and Y/n deserve so much better than you two. I really hope it was worth it James because I can’t forgive you. And the fact you have the audacity to come here after spending the night with Sharon just proves how little you care” when he sees Bucky’s eyebrow twitch in confusion he laughs “I really can’t see Y/n giving you a hickey after she’s told your sorry ass she’s divorcing you. Goodbye James it was nice knowing you”.

Y/n was right, he was alone. He had no one in his corner. Going through the divorce process was difficult for him, like she said she wasn’t going to take anything from him. Custody had been split between them evenly as agreed. The part he was struggling with was, only being able to see her at the weekends, their conversations was just about the kids nothing more nothing less.

Then Sam started to do drop offs and pick up leaving him completely crushed. He no longer got to see her even if it was for 10 or if he was really lucky 15 minutes. The friendship he had with Sam and Nat became strained, he didn’t blame them. He did miss them though.

To deal with the loss of his marriage he turned to drinking. Sometimes he would come home from the bar and call out for Y/n, cry when he got no response, 9 out of 10 times he’d fall over and then fall asleep on the floor.

Then that dreaded day came.

Sam had long gone after dropping the kids off, he was in the middle of cooking dinner with his oldest talking about school when he heard a name he hasn’t heard before.

“Sweetheart what was that?”

“Me and Tommy and Billy are now best friends they’re new to school”

“I’m glad but not that bit baby, you said someone helped you with your homework?”

“Oh Ari, he helps me he’s so clever daddy”

“Who’s Ari?”

“Mommy’s new friend. We saw them kissing” giggling when her younger brother pulls a disgusting face.

Of course he knew that it would happen, her dating. Of course she would, she had every right to find happiness and love after he destroyed that for her. Any man would be lucky enough to be with her - she’s funny, beautiful, loving, kind and passionate, the list goes on - he should know, he was once that lucky man before he fucked it all up.

The knowledge of his now ex-wife is dating again broke something inside of him. What? He doesn’t quite know, he shouldn’t have felt anything other than happiness for her.

~~~

It was their son’s birthday party today, the squeals of close to 30 children running around the backyard full of sugar could be heard from down the street, most of their little faces decorated with face paint.

The birthday boy was currently bouncing around on the dinosaur themed bouncy castle - that he just had to have - after laying on the grass for 10 minutes complaining he was ill. Their oldest daughter was walking around showing the adults her butterfly wings that went with the butterfly paint on her face.

Y/n was rushing around making sure everything was okay and running smoothly as well and making sure everyone was having a good time. Bucky thought she looked absolutely breath taking in the white floral dress and white pumps. Her hair was up in two fishtail braids, just like his daughter.

It was the first time in two years that he saw Steve - like Y/n he looked happier, healthier, freer. The woman that was placed snuggly under his arm was beautiful and when Bucky noticed Steve’s hand position when talking to Sam he saw the pregnancy bump, Bucky couldn’t help but smile at the sight of his former best friend finally getting his dream of being a dad.

The cheerful scream pulled his eyes away from Steve to his daughter who was running past him heading towards the sliding glass doors. A tall, well-built man stood at the doorway with a huge smile on his face.

“Ari Ari - look mommy Ari’s here”

“I can see that sweetie-“

He started to struggle to breath, his own daughter was more happier to see this Ari guy than him, the smile that lit up Y/n’s beautiful face crushed him. Then it got worse for him. He watched as his former best friend go up to Ari and greeted him in the same way them two use to great each other.

~~~

Going back to the once lively and warm house that he once called home the realisation of how truly alone Bucky was, was a tough pill for him to swallow.

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

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opencommunion · 3 months

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from a 2018 interview with Dr. Ghassan Abu Sitta on his experiences treating protesters wounded by the IOF during the Great March of Return:

"By 7:00 P.M., the system was on the verge of collapse. There were more injuries than there were beds, or operating rooms, in all of Gaza. Patients at al-Shifa were waiting four to five hours to get into the operating theater. At al-Awda alone, we had seen 120 gunshot wounds, and we were only a 3-operating room, 70-bed hospital. Every single case needed some kind of surgical intervention. And then suddenly there was a decision by the organizing committee of the march, I believe, to start pulling people back because they realized the system was basically about to collapse. By 7:00 P.M. it had become apparent that over a four-hour period, the number of injured had reached 3,500, with around 1,500–2,000 of those being gunshot wounds. Other than the 120 gunshot wounds at al-Awda, we had a lot of gas inhalation cases. And this wasn’t tear gas but nerve gas. These cases have continuous convulsions for an hour and need close monitoring and intervention in the form of anticonvulsants. ... The following day, the number of injured actually dropped because the whole of Gaza was in a state of shock: there had been 63 killed, 44 amputations, and 3,500 wounded in the space of four hours the day before, meaning that we were looking at something closer to a World War I–type carnage than a demonstration. The drop in casualty numbers allowed us to take on more cases: by day three, we were beginning to look at reconstruction for the previously injured and to really start to figure out what we would need for them. And the initial waiting list of 500 I mentioned earlier had more than tripled: there were now 1,600 cases that needed reconstructive surgery, that is, repeated surgical interventions were required to reconstruct these injuries.

Can you give us examples of specific cases? There were lots of cases of what we call 'fragmentation bullets,' historically known as 'dumdum' bullets. Fragmentation bullets were the first weapons to be banned in international law because the very point of that particular weapon is to maximize injury: a fragmentation bullet fragments into 20–25 different pieces when it hits the body. We saw lots of those. A guy came in one day with two bullet wounds, one in each of his ankles. From the trajectory of the bullet, we could tell that this was not a 'through-and-through,' that is, when a bullet penetrates one limb, exits, and then goes into another limb. These were two separate bullets, and the fact that they were both lodged in his ankles meant that they were fired at the same time or else he would have fallen. This man was shot at the same time by two different snipers. So, it is very likely that the two snipers were coordinating with each other to target this man, that it was not an accident. They must have been talking and saying let’s shoot this guy, I’ll take the right ankle and you take the left. That is what this injury implies. Yes absolutely, it was not an accident. It’s like a game, a sport.

... Tissue damage is all about the transfer of energy from the bullet to the tissue. So by definition, by their very nature, 'regular' sniper bullets have the highest form of energy and therefore the amount of damage that they are capable of causing is immense. But what we saw is that even these bullets were being tampered with by the snipers to allow them to behave like fragmentation bullets so that they would release more energy as they hit the body. They were drilling the bullets in such a way as to weaken the tips, so that once a bullet hit the body it would fragment into multiple pieces. ... The Israelis understand that the world counts the dead and considers the injured or the wounded a lesser crime, so to speak, and so it is an attempt at creating an 'iceberg effect': that is, a situation where what is apparent is the killed but the real crime is in the wounded [who are not as visible] and the type of wounds that have been inflicted. To have 13,000 wounded in a place that counts 1.8 million people ... that figure bespeaks a battlefield, not a demonstration." By the end of 2019, occupation forces killed 322 demonstrators (x) and injured 35,600 more (x), including many thousands with severe injuries leading to long-term disability (x). IOF snipers were documented shooting unarmed protesters with the intent to kill (x), as well as targeting kneecaps to permanently disable protesters (x). Their targets included children, paramedics, and journalists. Many protesters were left with long-term disabilities and trauma (x). This is how the occupation responds to unarmed resistance (or what liberals call "peaceful protest"): with "World War I-type carnage" that "bespeaks a battlefield."

#palestine #resistance #library #history #palestinian testimonies

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chrisitsraining · 3 months

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im TIRED of people talking about how resi games need to go back to fixed camera angles or focusing on zombie enemies or some shit i dont care about NONE of that

what we really need back is that cool voice that says the games title when you hit the start button

#dumdum hours #resident evil #re

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nozunhinged · 6 months

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I saw a post about fortpeat on some event which led me to scrolling through their tag for hours and I made a really funny observation that I can't not share 😂

When it comes to peat, it's very clear (IMHO) that he uses traits of his show-character for promotional events as well — during all the LITA stuff he acts like Sky towards clingy fort and now that his Love Sea character apparently is much more cocky and outgoing, you can see him change his character as well. (Huge props to that btw, made me a big peat fan)

Meanwhile there's fort the lovesick lil puppy who grins like a dumbass every time peat gives him an ounce of attention, trying to touch and kiss him every chance he gets.

I read somewhere that fort probably has a crush on peat and I can definitely see where that's coming from 😂😂 their dynamic is so funny. Professional meets goofy dumdum, my fav haha.

#fortpeat #love in the air #love sea the series

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arewedoneyet · 8 days

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trying to piece together the ss8 bangkok day 1 setlist:

steal the show

highway

fade

ไม่หายไป (still)

อุ่นหัวใจ (warm heart)

complicated

hide

almost over you

yellow leaf

lucid (with ink waruntorn)

golden hour (cover) (with ink waruntorn)

comedy

dumdum

feeling good (michael bublé cover)

stranger

black tie

white flag (nont tanont x jeff)

standing next to you (cover) (with nont tanont)

ghost

why don‘t you stay

saturdayss

fade

(help pls?)

#jeff satur #ss8 bkk d1 #i tried taking notes but… eh…

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jeffsaturwaist · 3 months

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🪐Jeff Satur Waist Leaderboard: Semi-finals🪐

Semi-finals!!! The winner of this round will make it all the way to the finals!

DumDum

The Heart Choker™️

Poll is up for 24 hours, finals will be happening this weekend!!

#jeff satur #jeff satur waist #music video #personal post #semi finals

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rillils · 2 years

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OK BUT THOR JUST ADORING BUCKY IN A BROTHERLY WAY AND BEING VERY TOUCHY IN LIKE A FRIEND WAY BECAUSE HES LIKE THAT AND STEVE, OBLIVIOUS AND VERY JEALOUS STEVE, IS JUST VERY VERY JEALOUS

yes, that would be it

NONNIE, MY BEAUTS, I FUDGING LOVE YOU 💕🥰💕🥰💕 you know, this ask made me grin like an idiot, and then I spent hours thinking about it, and then one thing led to another and it spawned this... thing? it's all kinda jumbled and unrefined, and I didn't give it a re-read so um. but yeah, you can find most of my ramblings under the cut :3

imagine if this is before the boys become a thing – they’ve been dancing around each other for the better part of a century, forever stuck in this relationship limbo because they are two big pining dumdums, with a history of trauma longer than the Nile and a deeply ingrained tendency to not talk about their feelings, and they’re hopelessly in love with each other, and also just. kinda hopeless in general. desperate to finally Make This Happen, but kind of at a loss as to how to do it.

after all, there never seemed to be a good time for this, right? they never seemed to have enough leisure and peace of mind to give this thing, this really important thing, the proper space.

but now, you know. now Bucky’s out of cryo, and their enemies are far away. there are no new wars in sight (shhh infinity war never happened), and most importantly, life in Wakanda has given Bucky the chance to find some peace, to rest, to take the first few steps of his journey towards recovery. so Steve figures, maybe. maybe for once the timing’s just right, and he can do what he’s been wanting to do since all his clothes were two sizes too big and his shoulders fit under Bucky’s arm as if the shape of him had been cut out of Bucky’s side. he can tell Bucky, and find out if Bucky feels the same way after all.

ENTER THOR.

and Thor, you see, he befriends Bucky as quickly and as naturally as he does everybody else.

Thor with the boisterous laugh of a godling in his prime and the eyes of an ancient soul; Thor who’s supposed to be the god of thunder, and yet beams as bright and warm as the sun.

Thor, who finds true enjoyment in making people feel good about themselves, and he’s always calling Bucky handsome, complimenting the progress of his beard, teaching him how to braid his hair the Asgardian way, patiently and eagerly, just like he was taught when he was a boy.

Thor is genuinely impressed by Bucky’s knife skills, the flipping and the throwing and the twirling – he himself was always more about power and momentum, rather than stealth and agility – but his brother, he tells Bucky with unsuspected fondness, his brother would find kinship in Bucky’s knack for sharp blades.

Thor never tiptoes around Bucky – on the contrary, he’s quick to sling an arm around Bucky’s shoulders, to slam his huge hand between Bucky’s shoulder blades with enough strength to generate a minor earthquake and make Bucky’s bones rattle like so many pebbles in a box.

Thor, who is a literal god and has the body show it, who’s battle-worn and fierce and still finds the time to pick wildflowers to bring as a gift for Bucky’s home, who owns two goats with super badass names (which then turn out to be the equivalent of Toothgap and Chews-a-lot), who could easily tuck Bucky under his arm and take him for a spin through the clouds with his magical hammer

and he’s gorgeous, and loyal, and generous, and a king amongst his people, and it would be so fucking easy to fall head over heels for someone like him

and then there’s Steve, who had only just managed to talk himself into confessing his feelings to the love of his life

and suddenly it’s like Thor is always there, and his hands seem to be on Bucky at all times – on Bucky’s arm, at his back, in his hair to weave it into lovely plaits – and Steve loves Thor, he does, but these days he also feels the occasional urge to bite Thor’s fingers off one by one

he’s jealous. he’s so fucking jealous it hurts. maybe he doesn’t even realize it at first, but then he recognizes it – this ugly feeling eating away at his insides, sitting unpleasantly in the pit of his stomach every time he sees Thor hover too close to Bucky for one second too long

and he hates it, he hates feeling this way. he knows he’s being unfair, to Thor and Bucky both. he can see how Thor’s friendship affect Bucky in the best way; how important it is for him, to have one person in the world who cares, who sees beyond his past and doesn’t resent or blame him for it; someone who values him, not just as an asset to use when the need arises, but as a man, as a person, as a friend

and Steve is glad, he truly is! Bucky deserves it all – the extra positive touch, the words of affirmation, the loud appreciation, all of it. he deserves to be surrounded by people who love him, who respect him, and he deserves to feel at ease with them, as he does with Thor

but.

but every time Steve hears him laugh at one of Thor’s jokes, or catches him listening avidly to one of Thor’s many tales, which sound better and more exciting than half the sci-fi novels out there, he can’t help but wish he were the one putting that gleam in Bucky’s eyes

when he sees Thor pull Bucky into a one-armed hug so easily, while he can’t even bring himself to take Bucky’s hand, look him in the eye and whisper the words he’s been carrying in his heart for so long–

when he goes back to their place – Bucky’s place – and is greeted by yet another trinket Thor brought back from his latest trip to this or that world, the number of them crowding every room now, like a constant reminder–

when he and Bucky sit together for dinner, or Bucky tugs him along for a walk through the fields, and the first words out of his mouth are “Thor told me...” or “Thor says that...”–

Steve is jealous. so jealous he can feel his heart darken with rot from the inside out, like an apple core crawling with worms.

and the thing is, superserum or not, Steve is only human – and one day, when they’re all together and Thor is being is usual, friendly, affectionate self, Steve snaps at him for no apparent reason

it takes him a moment to realize what he’s done, and the way Bucky’s looking at him... all Steve can think to do is stalk off to go sulk in private, and maybe let the ground swallow him whole

meanwhile, Bucky doesn’t know what to think – he’s surprised, and a bit angry, and very much confused. yes, Steve has been acting weird for some time, but this? this isn’t like him at all

Thor, on the other hand, he’s not half as oblivious as he may seem; he’s been watching for a while now, and he believes he knows what’s going on with his friend. so he takes Bucky aside and tells him. clasps Bucky’s shoulder, and with a warm, benevolent smile, of the sort you’d only ever see on an immortal being, he says, “I believe it’s time for you and Steven to have a conversation, my friend.”

and dammit, but Bucky thinks so, too

locating Steve is easy enough. Bucky finds him exactly where he thought Steve would be: sitting under the tree in their backyard, where they’ve spent many of their afternoons, reading to each other, dozing off in its shade, snacking on dried fruits and nuts as they sent cute cat videos and memes back and forth between them

he’s got one of the shepherd dogs curled up in his lap, and he looks so solemn and miserable, with his fingers buried in the puppy’s fur and his head hanging gloomily, Bucky almost feels bad for him.

he approaches calmly – he knows Steve is aware of his presence by now – and sits on the ground next to him, in the groove between the tree’s roots, which they have long since claimed as their spot.

It’s Steve who speaks first, a quiet mutter, like all the fight’s gone out of him.

“What are you doing out here?”

Bucky shrugs. “Came to see if you were fit for civil company again.”

He looks over – Steve’s chin is nearly touching his chest at this point, eyes trained carefully on a nondescript spot on the dog’s white fur. Well then, Bucky decides, if this is how it’s going to play out.

“You know, Thor says he fears he must have upset you somehow.”

Steve is quiet for a moment, but there’s something there, in the way his jaw clenches minutely under his beard, that tells Bucky he’s struck the right nerve.

“And why would he think that?” asks Steve.

“I don’t know, maybe because you were being an asshole to him?”

The tips of Steve’s ears burn red hot – shame, if Bucky had to guess. Good.

“You’re right,” Steve says eventually, sounding genuinely contrite. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have– I’m sorry.”

“You should apologize to him.”

Steve nods, “I will. I promise.”

and then it’s quiet again. Steve keeps rubbing his thumbs over the dog’s soft ears, silent, and it becomes clear to Bucky that if he wants anything to change here, he’s gonna have to make the first move.

“He’s got an interesting theory, you know. Thor,” he tells Steve casually, nudging Steve’s knee with his own. “He thinks you might be jealous.”

That catches Steve’s attention. His head snaps up, and this time he actually meets Bucky’s eye, stuttering, “Jealous? Wha– why would I, why would I be–”

But it’s precisely because he’s looking Bucky in the eye, that he can’t bring himself to finish that sentence.

“... Was it that obvious?”

He sounds so utterly mortified, Bucky can’t help a little smile there. “To some more than others. Subtlety’s never really been your thing, you know that.”

Steve sighs, leaning back against the tree trunk as tension visibly bleeds out of him.

“I’m so sorry, Buck. I’ve been the worst lately. I should have been supportive, should have been rooting for you making a new friend, and instead I went and made it all about me. I’m sorry, I really am.” He goes back to scratching behind the dog’s ears, avoiding Bucky’s gaze, hesitant even as he adds, “I just... could tell how much you liked him.”

So there it is, then.

“And you thought that, since I had him now, I would just forget about you?”

The apples of Steve’s cheeks flush pink, high and full across his cheekbones. “It sounds so stupid when you put it like that.”

Good, Bucky thinks, because it is stupid. Steve is stupid – a stupid, endearing, adorable idiot, and Bucky wants to kiss the uncertainty off of his pretty face so bad it actually hurts to hold back.

“I do like Thor,” he says, watching Steve nod pitifully beside him. “He’s a good man, or– or god, or whatever he is in the first place. The thing is, he’s a good friend, and good friends are hard to come by. But Thor is not the one I want to be with. He’s not the one I want to fall asleep with, or wake up to, or come home to when the day’s work is done.”

Steve looks up, lips parted, a single grain of hope gleaming in his eyes. “He’s not?”

Bucky smiles, fond. Either Steve’s just that blind, or he’s playing dumb because he wants to hear Bucky say it; but that’s fine, too. That’s more than fine. Bucky’s gone without putting this into words for long enough. “No, Steve.”

“But there is someone.”

Bucky snorts. “Yeah, there is someone.”

He scoots closer, until their shoulders meet, and slips his metal hand in Steve’s own, letting Steve lace their fingers together.

“There’s this guy, you know, a good pal of mine. We go way back, basically grew up together, and I might deny this tomorrow, but I’ve been holding a torch for him since like, forever. I even asked him to move in with me – twice now, if you can believe that.”

Steve’s head tips gently against his, nuzzling briefly at Bucky’s temple. His breath is soft against Bucky’s cheek, and their hair whispers together, silk to silk. “Did you.”

Bucky hums. “First time around, we were still kids. He got all stubborn about it, figured it must be charity on my part, you know, a good Samaritan kind of deal. Never even crossed his mind that I might be more selfish than that. That he was home to me, and I wanted to be the same to him.”

The gentle squeeze of Steve’s hand around his is worth a thousand words. Bucky can feel them press into his skin, I remember, rich with fondness for the boys they used to be, and We know better now, soft and grateful, and more than that, sweeter than that, I’m right here, right here with you, deep at the core of who they’ve always been – ubi tu gaius, my love. Where you are, there I will be.

“But he came around,” Steve says, and Bucky can hear the smile in his voice as he says it.

There’s a happy ending somewhere in this story, close enough that Bucky can taste it on the roof of his mouth already, and they can spell it together, same as they’ve been doing since once upon a time.

“He sure did,” Bucky confirms. “The second time I asked him, though, he didn’t put up a fight. In fact, he didn’t try to argue at all. He said yes right away, and I thought. Maybe we’d both had enough of being apart. Maybe he wanted this as much as I did.”

“He did,” Steve promises without hesitation, body turning towards Bucky, seeking his gaze, and there’s no way Bucky could doubt him when they are like this. No way he could mistake the truth in Steve’s eyes for anything but what it is.

“And now he’s here with me,” he says. “Living with me. Building a home with me. He cooks with me, cleans up with me, stays up with me when I can’t sleep. He hangs our laundry all squared up like he’s due for an inspection, and he keeps buying more socks than either of us can ever wear, and he makes a face every time this other guy brings flowers into our home, because apparently, he should be the only one who gets to do that.”

And there’s the bright pink at the tip of Steve’s ears again, and the way he blushes all the way from the mole on his cheek to the three freckles on his neck, the way he ducks his head a little, embarrassed.

It’s moments like this that make Bucky sure: this is the man he wants. This doofus right here, who looks at him like he can’t help but, stars in his eyes, and tries so hard to hide the smallest of smiles under his beard, but he hasn’t quite learned how yet. Bucky thinks he never will. And to be honest, he kinda likes it that way.

He cups Steve’s jaw, stroking over the dimple he knows is there, buried beneath the soft bristles, and feels Steve’s smile curve under his thumb.

“I know him like the back of my hand, and still he surprises me some days. He knows me, too. Knows all there is to know, all the things that matter. He just hasn’t picked up on how much I love him yet. How happy he makes me. How jealous I get when our dogs like him better than me,” he adds, tipping his chin towards the overgrown puppy currently in Steve’s lap. Steve chuckles, and if Bucky could spend the rest of eternity just counting the crinkles around his eyes and kissing each and everyone of them, he would.

“I gotta say, this guy sounds like a mook,” Steve teases softly. “Might be you’re gonna have to spell it out for him.”

Bucky slips his fingers in Steve’s hair, pulling him in.

“You’re a dick,” he rumbles.

“I love you too,” Steve rumbles back.

“Kiss me,” Bucky tries to say, but Steve is already there.

#anon #stucky #wakanda stucky #rillers scribbles #well more like rillers rambles lol #i don't know how this got so out of hand #but it's silly and it was so much fun to scribble xD #thank you so so much nonnie <3 #seriously <3 #this just gave me the opportunity to take my mind off of things and just kinda rant mindlessly for like 2 days straight #and i couldn't be more grateful if i tried #bless you nonnie!!#i hope this didn't stray too far from what you were looking for :3

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babyxbunnyx · 1 year

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Summary: Going on a date with Donnie

Relationship: Rottmnt Donnie x gn Reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 1117 words

Explanations: (h/c) = hair color, (e/c) = eye color

A/N: *throws something cute in here* Take this as an apology for my last Donnie Angst! Some follow up parts for it are in the making but for now have this here!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey brother where are you going?" Leo asked as Donnie was about to sneek out. As if summoned, Raph and Miked walked up to them. "Oh? You're going out? Where are you going?" Raph asked, crossing his arms. "That is none of your concerns. Now would you excuse me please?" Donnie tried to leave again, only to be held up by Mikey this time. "You're wearing some pretty nice clothes Donnie. Why's that?" Leo analyzed his twin. "You're right.. he is wearing way to nice clothes. Where are you going Don?" The purple ninja sighed. "I'm going on a date with (Y/N) okay? Would you please leave me alone now?" He regretted telling his brothers as soon after, Leo began smirking. "A date you say? What are you going to do with them? Where are you two going?" Mikey's eyes began to sparkle. "SO YOU FINALLY ASKED THEM OUT?!" He screamed, while Donnie covered his ears. "No.. they asked me out." Donnie scratched his neck. Curses were heard before both Mikey and Leo handed over some money to Raph. "Really?" Donnie asked shocked while his oldest brother smiled apologetic. "Sorry Dee but Raph dissagreed with us that you'd ask (Y/N) out.. guess he was right tho." Mikey pouted. "Unbelievable that you would bet on this matter!" Donnie crossed his arms. "Anywayysss you still need to tell us what you planned to do!" Leo chirped in. Donnie sighed, before telling them his plans. When he took a look at the clock, he cursed. "I really have to go, I'm already two hours late! See you!" And with that, he rushed outside, unable to notice his brothers forming a plan. It was midnight by the time Donnie finally left the lair. The purple loving turtle needed to find the right words to explain why he was late.

Meanwhile (Y/N) was close to calling it a night and leaving the ally they were supposed to meet Donnie. The (h/c) already waited for 2 hours and it was getting chilly outside. They were angry and dissapointed about getting stood up after it took them nearly 2 months to ask the turtle out. As (Y/N) was about to leave, said turtle landed in front of them, starteling the (e/c). Before they could start their rain of insults, Donnie began to speak. "I know I'm 2 hours late and I'm very sorry about that. My DumDum Brothers kept bugging me about where I'm going and they wouldn't stop bothering me until I told them I was going on a date with you. Then they botherd me again, asking what we'll do until I told them. I am so sorry let me make it up to you with the best date you'll ever had." He smiled apologetic while (Y/N) crossed their arms. "If you can't make it up to me, I will cause chaos in your lab with Mikey and Leo." They looked at the other with a stern face and Donnie knew they were serious about their threat. "I can assure you I will, my dearest." The turtle smirked and (Y/N) rolled their eyes. "Lets go then?" The human asked, rubbing their arms. "Well of course. Allow me." Donnie wrapped his hands around the others waist before taking off, flighying into the night. (Y/N) squealed before clinging onto the turtle. "Donnie!!" He just smirked, holding his date closer.

Soon enough they arrived at their destination. Donnie landed, letting go off the (e/c). Once they felt land under their feet, (Y/N) relaxed and looked around. The two were on the same roof the human first met the turtles. But this time it was decorated with fairy lights, blankets and pillows. A few inches away from the edge, a white board could be seen with a projector in front of it. The (h/c) eyes grew wide while Donnie smirked next to them. "I have allowed myself to make a list of your favourite movies and snacks and prepared a movie night with exactly those movies and snacks for us." (Y/N) smiled happily. "Thanks Donnie this is amazing!" Donnie smiled proudly, before sitting down with (Y/N). He handed over the snacks and something to drink before turning on the projector and selecting the first movie.

During the movie, the (e/c) kept glancing over at Donnie, who seemingly didn't notice. 'Would he be fine with cuddles?' (Y/N) asked themself, not sure of the awnser. Donnie sighed before wrapping his arm around the others waist, pulling them close. "You could have just asked if you wanted physical contact." (Y/N) blushed while the turtle smiled. Still hesitate, the human placed his head on Donnie's shoulder, enjoying the feeling of their crush being close to them.

One movie turned into 3 and by the time it ended it was 6am already. The human yawned, before stretching. "I think we should call it a night. Its 6am already Donnie." The turtle nodded. "You're right. I'm quite tired, I will remove all this later. Its not like anyone is ever up here." They picked up their trash, putting it into a bag Donnie brought for it. The turtle handed it over to (Y/N) before gently picking them up. He took off, flying in the direction of the humans appartment.

Meanwhile 3 shadows could be seen, following the two lovebirds, seemingly unnoticed by them. They landed on a roof nearby, watching the actions of their brother and his date.

Donnie landed in front of (Y/N)'s apartment complex, setting them down. "You held your promise, guess your lab can stay safe for another day." The human smirked, silently implying they had their best date now. "I am glad my lab is safe for now. I really enjoyed our date tonight, my dearest (Y/N)." Donnie smiled softly before placing a kiss on the back of (Y/N)'s hand, making them blush. "Oh if you want to kiss me do it right, you douche!" Before the turtle could react, (Y/N) had already pulled him close, pressing their lips together for a sweet kiss. Donnie stiffened at first, having not expected the others actions, before relaxing into the sensation. They broke apart once they heard some loud cheering, coming from a rooftop close by. When they looked up, Donnie could make out the silhouettes of his brothers. "I'm going to kill them.." he muttered under his breath before giving (Y/N) yet another sweet kiss. "See you tomorrow Sweetheart." The nickname left the humans heart racing and after saying their good bye, Donnie flew off to scold his brothers about spying on him and (Y/N).

#rise donnie x reader #rottmnt x reader #donnie x gn!reader #donnie x reader #rottmnt #rise donnie #rise donnie x gn!reader

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taxfreud · 2 months

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Love isn’t always romantic. Love is also my mom knowing which specific chocolate milk I like (prairie farms half gallon premium with only one sticker) and where to get it. Love is my brother texting me his top three songs a few hours after I recommend a singer to him. Love is my niece bringing me a bookmark and a dumdum in a paper bag as a present on a Saturday.

Love is a lot of things.

#personal

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blackjackkent · 5 months

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There is no sun in the shadowlands to help Hector wake, but his eyes flicker open about the same time as usual anyway, and for a moment he just lays in his bedroll, drowsing, feeling deliriously happy without quite understanding why. But memory drifts back, slowly, and he sits up on one arm, looks around the small rock-lined alcove where he dragged his bedroll, and finds himself alone. Karlach is not there.

Hastily he disentangles himself from the blankets, fumbles around for his clothes, which were tossed aside rather haphazardly during the previous night's exercise. He finds his shirt lodged in the crevice of a rock some distance away.

Karlach is back in her tent; he finds her sitting on the floor, running a cloth over the blade of her sword. A small smile drifts across her lips.

As he draws near, he can hear that she is humming softly to herself, a gentle, indistinct melody.

"Mmm...la da da... bum ba du-dumdum..."

Watch her quietly.

Hector leans against a nearby tree and simply listens to the sound of her voice, watches the lithe movement of her fingertips over the blade of the sword. He could watch her forever...

"Dada-dadum...mmm mmmhmm... oh!" She breaks off abruptly as her gaze drifts across him and starts to her feet, looking sheepish. "Gods, sorry, I was in my own world. Hi. Hello, good morning."

She grins giddily at him, bouncing on the balls of her feet, as if unable to quite believe that he's here, and she's here, and it's all real. "Sorry I didn't wait around this morning. I was just...just buzzing. Didn't want to wake you."

"I wouldn't have minded," Hector murmurs with a soft smile. It's the only thing that would have made the last twelve hours better - to wake up next to her.

She shrugs. "Still. You looked so peaceful." There's a wistful look in her eyes as she takes him in, standing in front of her. Even the foot and a half separating them at present feels far too much. "I wanted to go wherever you were. But.." She chuckles. "I'm me, so I did a lap of camp instead."

She pauses, scuffs her boot toe against the stone ground. "Last night was...incredible." She laughs shyly. "This morning is incredible. Every moment with you is...beyond belief."

Uncertainty splashes across her face for a moment. "You still like me, right?"

His eyebrows lift. He wonders who, in the past, tossed her aside like that, to make her think that he might. "I much more than like you," he says firmly.

She relaxes a little, smiles again. "I much more than like you too," she agrees. "And..." She hesitates. "And nothing bad is going to happen now?"

It's a plea for reassurance. And for once, he knows that honesty is not the correct answer. They both know, all too well, that there are an infinite number of terrible things that could lie ahead of them. She doesn't want to hear him say that.

They'll be together. No matter what, he will see to that. He would follow her to the hells, if that's what it took. He isn't even sure he could go back to the monastery now, after everything he's been through, even if it was an option. No matter where she goes, he'll be with her. Somehow.

[DECEPTION] "No," he says softly. "Nothing bad is going to happen to us ever again."

She smiles shakily. Reaching out impulsively, she brushes her fingertips against the chest of his robes, then cups his cheek with her palm. "I knew it. Good."

Her hand falls back to her side and she looks at him with deep tenderness. "I adore you, you know..." she murmurs.

For a moment, he isn't sure what to say. He knows what he wants to say, but...is it too soon? Would it be too much? What if she doesn't want to hear it? What if the sex was what she wanted? Once again, what if, what if, what if...

But he can't not say it. His heart is too full of it. It will burst if he doesn't say it aloud.

"I love you," he says simply.

Her eyes shoot open wide and then she smiles wider than ever. "I LOVE YOU TOO!" The words burst out of her explosively, and then she claps her hands to her mouth and starts to giggle uncontrollably.

"Oh, my gods," she sputters. "I've been *dying* to say that." Her whole body twitches with excitement, her arms flailing in all directions.

"My gods, if I smile any bigger, my face is going to *crack.*" She starts to catch her breath, her eyes locking back on to him, drinking him in, and he luxuriates in that bright grin on her face like a cat in the sun.

"Ahhh...I'm pathetic," she says ruefully. "Besotted! And it's all your fault." She pokes a finger into his chest playfully. "Ah. I guess we'd better get the day on. So much to do, so much to see..." She tries to steady her expression, but it keeps tugging back into a grin no matter how hard she tries. "Together! Wheeyy!"

----

(A/N: including a full recording of the scene here as well because tbh her VA does so amazingly with the cuteness of this scene and the animations are pretty great too, and my description and screenshots doesn't really do it justice.)

#bjk plays baldur's gate 3 #hector carlisle #i love her your honor #this is legitimately unironically and completely seriously one of the cutest romance moments i have ever seen in any video game

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