#dwlts

[catgirlslutticus]

Something weired is going on with my Tumblr mobile :/ it's not letting me go into mature blogs even though I've got all the correct setting for it 😭😭😭

#slutticus talks #delete later #after i have dwlt with this

[profound-boning]

Holding Back From You

prompt: thrisha’s post pairings: destiel word count: 2k tags: no warnings apply, implied sexual content, dean’s appallingly low self-esteem, perceived infidelity, friends with benefits to boyfriends only on tumblr | dwlts

When Dean woke up in Cas’s bed with a naked Cas lying next to him and a familiar ache, he’d known right away that the night before had ended with some very athletic drunk sex.

When Cas woke up and treated him to round two, he hadn’t bothered to ask questions. Why would he when he could finally have Cas exactly like he’d always wanted?

Finally, when Cas rolled off of him and stumbled to the bathroom, Dean’s upstairs brain tuned back in.

Hey, dumbass, it said, don’t you think it’s actually a really terrible idea to have sex with your roommate and your best friend?

Why yes, brain, that does sound like a bad idea. Except that that was the best sex he’s ever had in addition to Cas being the best person Dean has ever known. Okay, so Cas is a bit of a slob and he’s so quirky sometimes and he’s a runner, which is just weird, but he’s a good guy. Would climb a tree to save a cat or drop his own bags to help an elderly lady carry hers. And Dean really wants to keep having sex with him.

So Dean doesn’t question their new arrangement. They haven’t really discussed it since that first day when a freshly-showered Cas flopped down on the couch next to Dean and asked him how he felt about spanking.

This led to an in-depth discussion of boundaries and what exactly they wanted from each other in the bedroom. Which is all well and good, except that it makes their sexy time a bedroom-only activity and now Dean is having some serious feelings-related issues outside of the aforementioned bedroom.

Granted, these issues aren’t precisely new. Dean has been wrestling internally with telling Cas that he’s halfway in love with him for a solid two years now, but when Dean fucks it up is he going to lose his roommate and his best friend, too? On the other hand, is he going to spend the rest of his life pining over Castiel Novak? That’s a firm maybe at this point. So, no, feelings-related issues aren’t new.

There is something that is new, however, and that is the dark hickey Dean has just spotted on Cas’s hip bone and the fact that Dean is currently losing his goddamn mind over it.

It’s just a hickey, right? Nothing too horrible. The problem is that Dean knows for a fact he didn’t put it there—not that Dean doesn’t love Cas’s hips, but it’s not exactly a spot he’s inclined to leave a hickey—so that means that someone else put it there and Dean’s going to be sick.

He ends up going to the bathroom, actually, but he doesn’t throw up. Instead, he leans his arms against the counter and takes deep breaths. Then, he flushes the toilet and splashes a little water on his face. He looks at himself in the mirror.

This is fine, he lies, you’re fine. It’s not a big deal that Cas is getting some on the side. It’s not like he made you some vow of fidelity. Why would he? A good roll in the hay and a half-decent roommate and that’s all. You’re not good for anything else and Cas would be certifiably crazy to think otherwise.

After that rousing pep talk, Dean goes back to the kitchen and avoids looking at Cas as much as he can.

He’s not very successful, mind you, but he tries.

He does insist that Cas puts a shirt on if he wants to cook, which is a small victory. Cas is craving scrambled eggs but he’s not so good at watching the pan so Dean takes over after a little while and they both end up with a nice plate of egg. Cas likes ketchup with his while Dean just uses a bit of salt and pepper. Cas talks at length about his stupid thesis and his stupid undergrads and he hooks his ankle around Dean’s under the table, and Dean tries to remember to breathe.

After suffering through breakfast, Dean plops himself down on the couch with the intent to spend the entire day on Netflix. Maybe he’ll take a break to hit the grocery store and grab some more junk food. And whiskey. Maybe tequila, too.

But Cas ends up deciding to stay home rather than hole up in the library, which means nature documentaries and talking about the universe. It’s the sort of thing that Dean loves to do with Cas on a normal day, but today is not a normal day.

Today, Cas is wearing a physical reminder that Dean is not anyone special, that Cas is bright and handsome and so damn good in bed it’s a small wonder there haven’t been any indicators before this. Seriously, Cas has probably been hooking up with some other friends of his this whole time.

Maybe they’re not even his other friends, Dean thinks with growing horror. What if Cas is dating someone? What if there’s someone that Cas takes out to restaurants and the movies, someone whose hand he holds when they talk together in little cafes, when they go to art museums and concerts together? What if Dean is Cas’s dirty little secret?

Frankly, he wouldn’t be surprised. But it still fucking hurts to consider the possibility.

Maybe he shouldn’t be so upset about it. Really, if they’re not doing enough to keep Cas satisfied, then what else can Dean do but reap the benefits? Surely, if Cas had a problem, he wouldn’t have turned to Dean that morning with a devilish smirk and wrapped a hand around his morning wood. He’d been so comfortable and into it. So, if Cas wants Dean, even just on the side, then why would Dean fight that? He should be grateful to get anything from Cas, not questioning it.

He’s so distracted by his internal crisis that he doesn’t notice Cas has stopped watching the movie to watch him. Then, Cas leaves over and presses pause on Raiders of the Lost Ark.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, Cas?”

Cas huffs a small laugh. “What’s up with you?” Dean shifts uncomfortably.

“Nothing, man. Why, what’s up with you?” He turns to look at Cas, who squints at him.

“Don’t pull that with me,” he says. “I know when something’s wrong with you. You’re easy to figure out.”

Or just easy, Dean thinks miserably, his mind still conjuring images of Cas’s picture perfect partner and how confused and devastated they would feel to find out that Cas sleeps with him sometimes. Fairly often, actually, he thinks with a sort of smugness mixed with guilt. Jesus, he needs to get a grip.

“Cas, I’m fine,” he insists. “Can we just get back to the movie already?” Cas looks deeply unimpressed with his avoidance, lips pursed and brow furrowed as if he can glare hard enough to see inside Dean’s head. Dean really hopes that that isn’t possible otherwise he’d be fucked, and not in the fun way.

But he relents and clicks play, allowing them both to settle into silence once more. It’s not a comfortable one, though, it’s tense with nervous energy and a sort of inexplicable sadness.

Dean thinks he’s going to die when Cas needs to stretch, raising his arms up over his head and arching his back with a little groan. The action pulls up his t-shirt to reveal his belly button and hips, that fucking hickey staring Dean right in the face. He swallows harshly.

Eventually, the movie ends, and they transition to watching bad television. Cas gets out his phone to play games while Dean flips through the channels. It’s comfortable, except that Dean cannot keep his mind off of whoever had their mouth on Cas’s body.

It shouldn’t hurt this much, but it does. Their arrangement wasn’t meant to last, Dean knows that logically, but he’s nevertheless hoped that maybe one of those orgasms would open Cas’s eyes to the possibility of something else, something with more romance than he’d ever admit to desiring.

Things come to a head at dinnertime, with Cas standing by the fridge and holding a jar of tomato sauce in his hand and frowning at it like it’s withholding the secrets of the universe. And Dean loves him. Oh God, how he loves him.

“I love—. Wait, shit. Uh,” he stammers. “It’s just—Cas, I can’t do this anymore.”

Cas looks at him with wide eyes. “What?”

“I can’t—” He gestures uselessly between them. “This doesn’t work for me. I thought I could do it but I can’t anymore, I’m not strong enough. You’re great, Cas, you’re so great and that’s the whole problem really. You’re perfect and I can’t stand only being yours when we’re horny and—and I can’t be your side piece, Cas. I saw the hickey, okay?” He points to Cas’s hip and Cas opens his mouth but Dean cuts him off, he has to get this all off of his chest right now before he chickens out. “And I tried to convince myself it would be okay, that just having any of you would be enough, but it ain’t. I—I want all of you, y’know? But I know you would never want that, and it’s just—just tearing me up inside thinking about it, thinking about never having you again, but I had to—I dunno, I felt like I had to say something, I guess. Can’t do this anymore.” Dean’s breathing hard by the end of his little rant as if he’d run a full marathon, his face and his body hot with shame. He’s tense and ready to flee, wondering if Cas will be so uncomfortable he’ll want to leave right away or if he’ll ask Dean to pack his bags. Either way, this is going to end badly.

He dares to glance up at Cas, wanting to search his expression for clues, when he notices something is off.

Cas is smiling, wide and gummy. This is Dean’s favorite smile and it’s so rare; why is Cas smiling like that and why right now?

Still holding the fucking tomato sauce, Cas takes two careful steps toward Dean, close enough to touch.

“This bruise is from when I walked into the table last night but, yes, I like you, too.”

The little gears in Dean’s brain refuse to turn and process this information. “Huh?”

“I want the same things you do, Dean,” Cas says. He takes another step forward, his smile becoming a bit shy. “I want all of you, too.” The way his eyelashes are fluttering gently makes Dean’s heart trip over itself. “I…sort of thought we were in a good place? I mean, I really didn’t want to push you into a relationship you didn’t want. I just thought we would talk about it eventually.” Cas laughs. “I guess we’re doing that now.”

Dean has yet to form any words. He’s feeling a bit shocked and off-kilter at the moment. He does, however, take a half step toward Cas and reach out to grab the hem of his shirt. He squints at Cas’s hip and thinks, yeah, that’s definitely a bruise and not the sexy kind. Huh.

“Dean?” He looks up at Cas, who’s biting his lip. “Say something?”

What could he possibly say at this moment? How could he respond to being offered everything he’s ever wanted in the form of his gorgeous roommate and best friend? He takes another step, bringing them chest to chest in their cramped kitchen. Then, he raises both hands in order to cup Cas’s cheek, to nudge his bitten lower lip with his thumb, and to push his fingers into that dark, messy hair.

“I’m the luckiest son of a gun alive,” he finally says, drawing Cas even closer. “Not sure what I did to deserve this, but I ain’t gonna question it.”

Cas rolls his eyes before he leans forward to kiss Dean’s jaw. “You’re pretty dense for an honors student, did you know that?”

“Dense and blind, apparently.”

“I’ll forgive you,” Cas says, taking Dean’s hands in his own and stepping back. “I’ll forgive you if you come back to bed with me right now and don’t get up for a while.”

“Oh, I’m thinking we’re both gonna get up.” Dean smirks, following Cas to his bedroom with bare feet and an open heart, too.

#geaneric #fic #destiel #dean #cas #omegadeannet #glassesdeannetwork #profoundnet #mishacollinsnet #adorablecocklesnet #scrunchnet #dcjsquad #2014casnet #dwlts #au #pbwrites #publicado #smut implied #mine: 300

[eonghwa]

dwlt that- when it comes to my drawings/illustrations I have so many ideas at once that I get overwhelmed because I don't know where to start (and the amount of time I need to spend stresses me out)

as for my paper, I practically need to choose anything I like, as long as it is related to graphic design, but every time I think of a topic I am afraid that I won't have enough resources, not to mention that the teachers might not like the topic 😭

here are your pancakes🥞🥞💖

yes that is exactly how i feel 😭😭 it’s just a pain chain 💔

i’m sure anything you choose you will find many resources, with graphic design even what may seem the “smallest” topic when you start doing research you always find many more than you expect! and i’m sure you will do great, think anout something that you like so you can make it more fun for you 🧡 imma throw hands if the teacher doesn’t like the topic

#📮 — ask #iiidekanymoreee

[sneakycat-bishes]

Deceit’s Apparent Arms

So, going off the DwLT, or the latest episode of Sanders Sides. 

We are shown a scene of where Deceit is shown to have six arms. (I do not know how to do gif for Deceit six arms with Remus) And since fanders have speculated it was a play to either show or hint at Remus’ ability or symbol of the octopus. 

I think it was a touch of how lying could be...anything, really. It can be good, bad, amoral, half-truth, half-lie, omitted. It can be anything. I think this was an intentional scene by the playwriters. 

(Please just let me kick my thinking machine into overdrive.) 

The scene of where Deceit waved his arms around in a strange movements meant to attract the viewers to them. I think it was to show how Deceit is basically a multiple gateway to ways and forms of lying. 

And since his logo is a two headed snake, I think that was a nod to Janus, the greek\roman god of gateways or pathways. Just how Deceit could either take lying to a good or bad ways, but there’s always the invisible option of the middle path. Where Deceit is going through, with letting Remus to the main sides. 

(Remember, no one can stay completely honest forever.)

Thank you all for coming to listen to my ted talk. 

@lostonehero @sympathetic-deceit-trash @sidespromptblog

#deceit sanders #ts deceit #sympathetic deceit #symbolism #dukedontlook #remus mention #Im just vomiting words upon words #deep thinking #theory #ts theory #long post ish #thatsthat24

[tricobicofriend]

DWLT this song from woy

#tattletail jess & vi #my tattletail jess & vi drawings #my tattletail drawings #tattletail #my tattletail fanart #my drawings

[holyvaras]

BESTAS LENDÁRIAS - IV - YOUKAI TIPO - Água 🐟🐙 Voltamos postagem td dia Tmj galera Espero q gostem ;D #hachuras#animals#eye . . . #art #instaart #inspiration #creative #inkart #fineart #artwork #artworks #draw #myart #desenhista #artefinal #magic #magicmonster #darkeyes #eyes #monster #monstro #watermonster #water #seamonster #youkai https://www.instagram.com/p/CR7qum-DWLT/?utm_medium=tumblr

#hachuras #animals #eye #art #instaart #inspiration #creative #inkart #fineart #artwork #artworks #draw #myart #desenhista #artefinal #magic #magicmonster #darkeyes #eyes #monster #monstro #watermonster #water #seamonster #youkai

[ruthcrossley]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Where to go in Punta Cana | Best Restaurants, Cafes,...

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Where to go in Punta Cana | Best Restaurants, Cafes, Pizzerias, Pubs & Bars - https://youtu.be/DwlT-PwTGmo

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Where to go in Punta Cana | Best Restaurants, Cafes,... published first on https://everythingpuntacana.com

[puntacanallc]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Where to go in Punta Cana | Best Restaurants, Cafes, Pizzerias, Pubs & Bars - https://youtu.be/DwlT-PwTGmo

#apartments in punta cana #villas in punta cana #punta cana airbnb #holidays to punta cana #vacation

[mipeli]

En las próximas fiestas navideñas 40M de animales serán sacrificados. En lo personal, me parece una manera incongruente de celebrar el nacimiento de un maestro iluminado con el sacrificio de todos esos animales que no quieres ser caldo de camarón, pierna, relleno de pavo, pavo horneado y demás platillos. Todavía es tiempo de cambiar: prueba opciones deliciosas libres de crueldad animal. Saca de tu cabeza y de tu plato alimentos de origen animal. _____________________________ (en Vegamo MX) https://www.instagram.com/p/B6RJfa-DWLT/?igshid=1ocdd4ytu9f1a

[executive-transitions]

Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) – Non-Executive Director x 2, Member By Debbie Wright Non-Executive Director x 2, Member - Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) North West London and South Central England | Southall | Ealing CFO/Financial Growth Management Human Resources Legal/Compliance Deadline date: 9th March 2018 Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) is a newly formed trust in Southall, Ealing.

#Vacancies

[profound-boning]

Last Kiss

13.02 coda, destiel, 669 words | dwlts

Dean opens his eyes into the darkness of his bedroom. The digital clock on his bedside table reads 1:58 AM in blinking lights. He doesn’t wonder about what woke him though, he knows.

Castiel is curled against his back, a wall of warmth from his nape to his calves. Dean can feel the rush of air at the knob of his spine, long fingers resting still against his naked hip, the press of knees against his legs felt through layers of cotton.

He tries not to change his breathing but not a minute later, he hears Cas’s gruff voice.

“Dean?”

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” he says. “Go back to sleep.”

“Mmh.” Cas grunts and squeezes Dean’s hip. “Was just dozing. Why are you up?”

“Dunno. Probably wanted to spoon or something.”

“Or something.” He feels Cas’s smile press against his shoulder, followed by a kiss.

He leans back and into the touch, into the soft and sturdy of Cas’s torso. He’s never felt safety like this before, never felt so utterly at peace just from proximity to a bedmate. Another person, yes, because Sam’s snores have been Dean’s lullaby for years. Sometimes it was the only thing keeping him going, back when they lived in an endless string of motels, when they rarely saw their dad, when Baby was the only home they had. Now, they have the Bunker. Sam is safe in his own room. They are grown, much older than Dean ever thought they could be, and they are happy.

Dean has Cas and he is happy.

He rolls over to face him, the fallen angel in his bed. The dimly lit room casts everything in shadow, highlighting his forehead and cheekbones and the blue of his eyes still shines like there might be Grace inside. With his arms curled up between them, he brushes one hand down Cas’s chest, feels the thumping heart beneath his ribs and his t shirt. Cas’s left arm is curled under his head but his right hand dances across Dean’s skin.

“Beloved,” Cas whispers, and Dean smiles. He presses his mouth to Cas’s in a tender kiss.

Their first kiss was not quite so relaxed. Arguing about a case and self-sacrificing bullshit when Cas grabbed him by the shoulders and planted one on him. A welcome interruption, and one that they repeated many times over the years. Sometimes it helped settle an argument or quiet an angry voice. Other times it just meant I need you.

Dean’s never enjoyed kissing so much before. It used to just be foreplay and now it can be the main event; it can be a whole conversation.

“I love you,” Cas whispers into the warm air between them. Dean knows it and cherishes it and kisses him again and again and—

Dean opens his eyes into the darkness of his bedroom. The digital clock on his bedside table reads 1:58 AM in blinking lights. He doesn’t wonder about what woke him though, he knows.

He’s curled up on his side, utterly alone and strangely cold.

Sam is down the hall, hopefully asleep, and Jack is doing whatever the hell Nephilim do. Dean’s at home in the Bunker but not in his bed. Not anymore.

“Cas,” he whispers into the silence. His heart, numb and cold in his chest, still stutters when there’s no response. He’ll never hear that once familiar response again, no matter how often he repeats Cas’s name.

He’d always thought they’d have more time. Once the Darkness was gone, once Lucifer was gone, maybe, maybe, maybe…

And now it’s too late. He’d put it off for too long and he’d never said it back.

Their last embrace is weeks past, their last conversation mere days ago, and now he’ll never know what could have been. From now until God only knows when, all he has is the memory of their last kiss.

Dean closes his eyes against the stillness and the dark of the room and he breaks a little more.

#ozonecologne #casthewise #maplecas #jhoomwrites #adoringjensen #13x02 coda #I hate this I'm sorry #omegadeannet #glassesdeannetwork #mishacollinsnet #adorablecocklesnet #scrunchnet #dcjsquad #2014casnet #pbwrites #publicado #fic #canon #coda #destiel #dean #cas #mine: 100

[nedworks-net]

Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) - Non-Executive Director x 2, Member

Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) – Non-Executive Director x 2, Member

Non-Executive Director x 2, Member – Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT)

North West London and South Central England | Southall | Ealing CFO/Financial Growth Management Human Resources Legal/Compliance Deadline date: 9th March 2018

Dormers Wells Learning Trust (DWLT) is a newly formed trust in Southall, Ealing. The trust seeks one members and two non-executive directors to support the trust’s…

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[profound-boning]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (◠‿◠✿)

oOoOoh! Okay here we go~*

(note: for the Tumblr links, if you edit the part that says profound-boning to casolantern you will be able to access it! Sorry for the inconvenience.)

My number one is still This Love. I put so much heart into it and I love it so.

ao3 | t | DWLTS | celebrity!au tattoos coming out reunions

“Can you tell us a little about these tattoos, Dean?” Tracy continues. “That pair of lips, for example?”

A close second is Sweet Surrender, Sweet Forgiveness. I loved writing this and I can’t wait to show y’all my timestamp ideas.

ao3 | t | celebrity!au enemies to lovers fake relationship

"You couldn't handle it all."

Dean’s eyebrows pinch together. “Is that a challenge?”

Cas smirks. “A month, then.”

“Six months. And then I’ll publish your biography.”

Another work I’m doing timestamps for due to my unending love for it is Learning Brave. I was so excited to get to participate in the Destiel Reverse Bang and I really put a lot of thought and effort into this one.

ao3 | t | mafia!au a/b/o star-crossed lovers sex and violence

I am always a groomjust learning to pull my own weightwithout wishing my past weighs less than it does.Learning Braveis a hand-me-down suit from Terrified As Hell.from "Elbows" by Andrea Gibson

I love reading fics where they’re all angels, so writing The Point Is Probably Moot was a really happy moment for me. *whispers* there may or may not be a timestamp in the works for this one too sshhhh

ao3 | t | angels!au a/b/o mutual pining friends to lovers

Despite his devotion to their Father, Castiel knows that his heart has belonged solely to Dean for millennia. And he feels sadder by the day to know that such a love will never be reciprocated.

And finally, my latest, Tune As Old As Song. I LOVE Disney and I love the Cogsworth/Lumiere angle, so I was pleased when someone special requested I write this guy. I am obsessed with Regency/Victorian era AUs, there truly are not enough to satisfy me. *sigh* So I really had fun playing that up, researching about household help in that period, etc.

ao3 | t | beauty and the beast!au temporary mcd love confessions

“Cas, did you hear?” Dean hisses, none too quietly.

“My, did it have something to do with you screeching ‘girl’ when you ran into me a moment ago?”

Dean rolls his eyes. “C’mon. You’re the eyes and ears of this whole place. Tell me you’ve seen the girl. Where has she gone?”

“Well considering the deal she’s struck with Sam, she’s likely in her rooms, extremely upset. Don’t you go making it—” Dean’s already run off. “—worse.”

#pbwrites #thanks ashley :) #casbakespie #get out of my ask

[profound-boning]

The Way I Loved You

Dean Creations Challenge August: languages prompt: English pairings: destiel word count: 2.3k tags: no warnings apply, A/B/O, omega!dean, arranged michael/dean, alpha!cas, arranged marriage, angst and fluff ao3 | Dean Winchester Loves Taylor Swift

Dating Michael Shurley is perfect. This is what every Omega wants, Dean tells himself repeatedly while getting dressed for the evening.

The sensible Beta is exactly his type: tall, dark hair, blue eyes, smart, funny, and considerate. Michael is incredibly sweet and he smells nice, like fresh laundry drying in the sun.

His friends at the library tell him all the time they're so jealous, that he's so lucky.

And Dean knows that he is. His parents could have chosen someone far worse than Michael, he knows. But—

But nothing. Dean shakes his head a little to dispel the thoughts swirling inside. He really couldn't ask for anything better, truly.

Dean finishes buttoning his coat just as the doorbell rings. He moves swiftly to the door and bids his parents goodbye over his shoulder, almost pushing Michael from the doorway with his body.

Not that he'd actually do that, of course, it'd be very improper for the both of them.

Michael seems not to notice or doesn't seem put off by Dean's haste to leave the manor.

"Good evening, Dean," Michael greets calmly, bending just slightly to brush his lips against the back of Dean's hand.

"Hello, Michael." Everything is fine, it just gets annoying to stand there ready to go while John and Michael chat for ten minutes when he's this hungry.

"I cannot wait to try the new menu at Biggers and Sons. I have heard it is simply divine," Michael says.

Dean nods, remembering that Michael had been insistent on taking him to a fancy new restaurant in another part of town tonight. He hopes there will be something on the menu he's actually heard of before, like at—

Nope. Not thinking about that right now. Dean brings his focus back to what Michael is saying while they walk towards his vehicle.

"…and perhaps we could go for a walk through the park after." Dean gives another nod he hopes is convincing enough. He's not meant to speak up unless directly asked a question that needs a verbal response.

They've arrived at Michael's car parked at the curb. It's not a bad car, per se, but Dean thinks forlornly of the large black Impala in his father's garage and of—

"You look beautiful tonight, Dean Winchester." Michael brings his hand up for another kiss and Dean gives him another hopefully winning smile. Michael opens the passenger door and closes it carefully behind Dean.

There's nothing wrong with this car. There's nothing wrong with this date, or with Michael. Dean feels absolutely fine.

:     :     :     :     :

Dean is dreaming.

He knows that he is asleep in his bed and dreaming. But it is so pleasant, he can't bear the thought of waking and losing this.

They're lying in an open field on the outskirts of town. They left their shoes and overshirts behind and ran barefoot through the tall grass until they found this patch of wildflowers.

Castiel looks gorgeous with the yellow sun in his hair. He's weaving delicate blue flowers into Dean's hair and his own.

When he's satisfied, they lie down side by side but opposite of each other, so their heads are together and their feet pointing in opposite directions. Cas has curled up on one side and propped his head up with his right arm in order to properly look at Dean's profile.

He can feel the sensation of Cas watching him like a rush of warm breeze on his cheek. Cas's petrichor and fresh grass scent is lovely beneath the smell of the flowers around them. When Dean turns to look at those blue eyes, he's met with a small smile.

"Dean."

That voice settles something deep inside his chest.

"Dean!"

In a flash, the dream has changed.

Another memory is playing out, and Dean is just as helpless to the emotional roller coaster as before.

They're standing on opposite sides of Cas's little gold car. It's nothing special; Cas doesn't make enough money at the tailor's to afford something huge or fancy. But it's been enough for the two of them to drive all over town together.

Right now though it feels like an insurmountable wall between them. The sky is dark and heavy with rain clouds.

"How can make you understand?" Cas is saying, his brow furrowed in anger. "I couldn't call earlier because I was working, Dean. I need to work so that I have enough to provide for you. I want—"

"Cas, you don't have to worry so much. It's—"

"Of course I worry, Dean! This is important to me! Our future is important to me. I want to be able to take care of you myself, without your parent's influence—"

"Why can't you just accept their help Cas? We could tell them about us, we could—" Dean asks, raising his voice now over the thunder.

"You don't see the way they look at me, Dean." Cas looks wild in his frustration. "I don't have the money or the status that they want for you. I'm not enough."

It's an argument they've had so many times. Cas doesn't see that he's enough, more than enough for Dean.

He rounds the car and presses Cas against the door, so unlike the docile Omega he's meant to be. Cas never cares whether or not Dean is behaving the way he should. He never tells him to quiet down or take smaller bites of food, never leaves him out when he speaks to other Alphas or dismisses his feelings.

"You are everything to me, Castiel, and you know it." Dean seals their lips together in a heated kiss just as the rain starts to fall.

He wakes up.

:     :     :     :     :

Michael arrives at five o'clock exactly to escort Dean to the cinema and still have plenty of time to talk to John and Mary in the sitting room. Dean waits impatiently in the kitchen with Sam.

Sam is still unpresented, but his taller than average (taller than Dean, even) height suggests he'll be an Alpha like their father. His demeanor, however, is so unaggressive, so patient and caring that it's difficult to tell.

Dean can only hope that Sam will never be a knothead like some of the kids at school were, or like some adult Alphas on the street.

His little brother still engages him in conversation about topics other than mating, childcare, and household chores. Sam asks Dean about politics and sports and his actual opinions on all manner of things. It's something small for which Dean is very grateful.

"Dean, I was wondering if—. I only mean to say that… Well, Michael is a good guy, right? I mean he's not—"

"Sammy." Dean cuts him off with a glare. "Michael is great. He's a good choice for me."

Sam doesn't look thrilled with that answer but he doesn't argue.

When Michael enters the kitchen, he doesn't back Dean into a counter or press his hand to the back of Dean's neck. He respects Dean's space and his time, he never forgets to call. Dean can see that he tries to endear himself to Sam, but he suspects that the younger boy distrusts him.

They agree to walk to the theater and Michael speaks kindly with him the whole time. He is charming with the staff when purchasing their tickets and when he gently guides Dean away from the snack counter.

The film is interesting enough, and Michael has plenty to say about it afterward while they take a stroll down Main Street. Some shop windows are still lit up in the darkness of the twilight.

Dean pretends not to notice that Novak and Milton's Tailoring is one of them.

He dreams again of his dates with Castiel, more afternoons in the summer sun and secret meetings at the library. There they could hide between the shelves and kiss sweetly.

Dating Michael is comfortable, and Dean should be happy with that. He is happy with it. But he's not.

[ Read the rest on ao3 ]

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