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collectivecloseness · 2 months

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E.M. Little Mermaid AU

Chapter 1

Eddie Munson x reader

Summary: Three days after Eddie Munson dies in the Upside Down, you’re called to make a deal with the not so dead Vecna. One where your boyfriend will be brought back to live a long and healthy life, but after the next three days, you need to receive true loves kiss from him. The only problem is Eddie won’t remember you... and you’ll have no voice. You, and the rest of the party, have three days to make Eddie fall in love with you all over again; especially since you don’t know what power you’ve given Vecna by making a deal with him...

(Notes: Plot loosely based on both movie versions of the little mermaid. Refs to Vecna having a ‘special’ interest in reader, esp in this chapter, but only em/r. Cw: references to character death and trauma)

3 days. It had been three days since Eddie had died in the upside down. And you’d been able to do nothing about it except hold him as he passed.

You had apologised to Steve for slapping him, right after he threw you over his shoulder and dragged you out of the upside down himself because you were still clinging to Eddie. Just wanting to stay with him, uncaring if that sealed your fate too or not.

Steve had of course forgiven you. He was a good man. You could tell he was upset not being able to save his friend also.

But Eddie was more than your friend. He was your soulmate. Your everything. Your future. What would you do now Eddie’s future had gone? Where was your part in the world now?

Nancy had taken the gun out of your hands the moment Steve landed your feet back on the grass and soil, over where the entrance had sealed closed, a gateway through the woods near Eddie’s home. She followed you when you stumbled behind a tree a few steps away. But all you did was hunch your back over, and vomit up your insides onto the ground.

Robin had caught you before you could fall onto your knees into it. And she’d been holding you as Steve held Dustin. You didn’t know what Robin was saying to you. You caught glimpses of what was happening around you, but you weren’t really paying attention.

Eddie was dead. And he wasn’t coming back.

You tried to save him. You’d thrown yourself over him. Your arm had shielded part of his torso as the demobats ripped his stomach open, but it wasn’t enough.

Joyce stitched up your wrecked arm, but you didn’t feel the pain.

Eleven had tried to talk to you. Tried to tug on her older sibling figures shirt. But your eyes remained misty and dazed.

Right up until the moment you burst into tears.

And you hadn’t stopped crying. Not for two days, all you did was cry and scream and choke. You’d had to tell Wayne what happened. He cried with you. But separately.

It was the third night now. You were in Eddie’s room, Robin and Steve staying over today. Wayne couldn’t handle it tonight, he was staying with a good friend, just to sleep.

The first night no one had slept, you’d cried all night in the room where you told Wayne his nephew- his son was dead.

The second you’d stayed in Eddie’s bed. Face buried in the dirty laundry that still smelled of him all over his pillows and covers, sobbing as you looked over the pile of his trinkets and collections all over his room. His room had once been your entire world, because it was just so Eddie. You couldn’t bare the thought of any of it being gone, Wayne moving any of it, because you couldn’t deal with the fact Eddie was gone.

You kept the necklace Eddie gifted you close to your heart, as you had since the moment he’d clasped it around your neck. Pressing a kiss to your ear as he did so - you could still feel the tickle from his laugh, his lips against your ear, his hands warm and always so loving pressing on your shoulders, after his fingers daintily brushed away any of your hair that may get caught, in case you got hurt, twirling your hair around his rings.

Eddie told you you could fill the locket with anything you wanted. He’d even offered up the thought of chopping off a lock of his shaggy mullet, a thought he’d have once been mortified by. Now you wished you’d taken up the offer, but you still liked what it held instead.

Opening the pendant up, at least you would be able to still see that picture you took of Eddie. Smiling, that smile he only ever gave because of you, one that anyone upon looking would immediately be able to sense the love radiating from him in the photo, from the moment it was taken. His big doe brown eyes, those ones you missed staring back at you so much, looking right at the camera, at you every time you looked at it. It felt like he was looking into your soul, even when he was still... And with this you could hold him to your heart, always.

Right now as you lay motionless, unable to cry much tonight, you looked over at Eddie’s vast collection of guitars. Electric and acoustic. You always thought he was so musically talented, and you told Eddie so.

You weren’t nearly as good. Although there was one song you’d always sing to him. You didn’t have the words, but it was a melody. You couldn’t remember if you’d heard it somewhere before, if it was a lullaby, or a song you’d made up as a child, but- but you’d always hum that tune to Eddie when he was sad. It made him feel comforted. That small chorus of notes. You’d sing that melody to him every time Eddie needed it. Your throat felt dry thinking you may never sing it again.

You’ll never see Eddie again.

You’ll never see Eddie again...

You didn’t remember closing your eyes, you had been so exhausted not even the last three days, but all the time spent trying to help Eddie before you failed him. But suddenly you were dreaming. Well, you thought you were at first. But then it all felt so real.

“Eddie?.. EDDIE!!!” You run over to where you see Eddie walking towards his trailer. Wayne is standing by the door, well worn cigarette dropped on the floor in shock.

And Eddie, your Eddie, is turning around, looking all over, confused, but unharmed. “Y/n?”

You cheer silently, a gasp leaving your massive grin, as you run over to Eddie. Feeling so soothed the moment he wraps his leather clad arms lovingly around your body, his ringed and clean hands immediately burying themselves in your hair, as Eddie always did... does.

Your face is buried into Eddie’s dark curls. A whimper leaves your lips. Eddie’s conditioner smells just the same, and you can catch his sweat, but no grime, in his scent too, pressing your nose and lips to his neck as your chin rests on his black leather jacket, eyelashes fluttering against his mulleted hair that tickles them. And you’re happy.

Eddie’s back! You have to tell everyone!!

Your hands tighten around Eddie’s waist. And while he pulls you in closer, he still doesn’t hurt you with his grip. Ever tender with you, his love. You press a shaky, teary, kiss to his neck, tasting your own salted tears over the small hairs there, and you sink into Eddie’s embrace, ready to look back once more at your boyfriends gorgeous face.

Only to find he doesn’t have one.

You fall back to the ground with a scream caught in your throat, your hands hitting the stone hard dirt as you look at Eddie, pale, faceless, a blur of nothing, just a shape behind perfectly familiar curls, standing above you aimlessly.

The flash of his face, that face, only lasts a moment. And you’re remembering how it felt having Eddie back. The need to tell everyone he was alive still so pertinent.

That need still, the sound of your thoughts, “Eddie’s back... you can see him again” echoey but not unpleasantly loud. The knowledge of Eddie being in your arms just a small step in the future away, they all stay deep in your gut, as demobats swirl above you. No blood on their mouths like the last time you saw them. The sky just red and blue, as it had been down there three days ago. As the same voice you thought you defeated calls to you, to let you know that he promises what you intially experienced just then was real...

Your whole body jolts on Eddie’s bed, finding yourself still facing the side, only a minute or two having passed on the dragon alarm clock you bought Eddie four months ago.

Steve and Robin were still in the kitchen, you saw the light through the slit in Eddie’s door. Wayne still gone for the night. And with everyone out the room, you knew what you felt, what he told you was real.

Vecna had released you. And you can still hear him.

When his voice tells you to follow the bats, you peek outside Eddie’s worn out curtains, and find two demobats, out of place in this world, and in their nature, sitting idly on Eddie’s front lawn. Just waiting for you. Even though they’re what killed Eddie, you still follow.

Still wearing regular clothes, one of your favourite shirts of Eddie’s on your torso, your necklace under it, you quickly slip on your shoes by his bed without even looking, and make your way to the open space of his trailer.

Steve and Robin immediately stop talking, both turning to you with that same look they’ve had for two or three days now. Not that you’re looking much place else other than the door.

“Hey!.. Hey y/n.”

“Hey man.”

Steve and Robin both greet you, quietening down as their bodies relax while talking to you. Just wanting you to be safe, and knowing right now you need their support more than ever.

You give them a quick nod, but you know you can’t go out there and follow those demobats without getting Steve and Robin uninterested in your comings and goings.

Your friends were eagle eyed looking out for you at the moment, all of them. And you were thankful that your friends were so loving, but right now, you knew you had to get out there.

And so you turned to your biggest target first, Steve, before your eyes had to look anywhere else, to not see all the emotion swimming in his soft brown ones. “I’m just taking a walk. I need to stretch my legs. Get some fresh air in my brain. I don’t think I’ve been feeding it anything else.”

“We- We’ve got pizza!” Robin offers, bringing over a half eaten pizza box from lunch. As they’d all been trying to find quicker ways to eat, to shower, to sleep, because dealing with their traumas right now was time consuming enough.

“Yeah! Let me make you an energy smoothie or something, get some pizza with Robin, like she said.” Steve enthuses, pressing a hand to Robin’s shoulder and giving her a nod, one she gratefully returns; both turning around to do their tasks for you in sync, before you interrupt them.

“No I’m fine. Seriously guys, I just need, like, ten minutes of walking.” It would probably be longer than ten minutes. But you needed them to let you out the house. And they couldn’t exactly be mad at you for lying to them with what you were going through right now.

“We can go with you! Or just one of us, silently.” Steve says enthusiastically, although that last part directed right at Robin. But you shake your head before he can go on, your eyes flitting to the closed curtain on the trailer door as you try to see if they’re still waiting.

“No, guys, I-“ your hand goes to your chest, breathing stuttered. “I just need some time alone with my thoughts. Please. I promise they’re not the self destructive kind. I just need to think.” You looked to both of them, eyes serious.

Steve looks nervous. His eyes a little wider and his lip more bitten, like he already knows he wants to say no, but he’s not sure how to do it without upsetting you any bit. Until Robin surprises him by pressing her hand to his wrist, and stepping up. “Okay. Ten minutes. Try and stay in the trailer park, and like, yeah, if it gets over ten minutes we’ll come to find you, but that’s okay. Just yell if you need anything, alright?”

You were too grateful to be leaving quicker than you could say a thank you, too quick out the door to see Steve giving Robin a look like he wanted to intervene, before she shook her head. Moving towards the window silently, to peek open the curtains, and Steve immediately understanding her.

Inside the park or not, Steve still needed to reassure himself over your safety, so did Robin. Getting his shoes on and kicking Robin’s towards her silently, both grabbing their makeshift weapons still by the front door of the trailer, just in case, Steve too protective not to right now, they both followed you out the door quick enough to see your back moving through the dark trees of Hawkins.

You had stopped dead in front of the demobats, waiting to see if they’d rip you apart just like they did Eddie.

Especially now they were intruding on his home, right after they’d stolen everything from him.

But instead they’d just... looked at you. The feeling was odd, making your skin crawl. Before the nearly identical demobats looked at each other, then chirped nightmarishly before swooping into the sky, gliding at a slow pace above you, to make sure you followed along.

Settling your heartbeat in your chest, at hearing that cry again, the last time you heard it being as Eddie’s own cry joined the chorus, you tried to steady yourself as you followed them. The vision of Eddie, back in your arms, back home - and his voice still looming in your head - causing you to follow.

You went through the woods, following them the whole walk until they took you to a patch of land closeby you knew well from experience was an opening. The one you’d narrowly escaped from three days prior. Leaving Eddie down there.

Robin and Steve had followed along, silently, even as they saw the demobats. They were just glad they’d brought their weapons. They stayed tight knit with each other, not knowing why you were following, if you were under Vecna’s trance again or something, but sneaking along to make sure you would be alright. They knew how ruined you were after Eddie. But they wouldn’t lose you too.

It was only until they saw where the ground had opened up underneath the swirling demobats, and saw you watching the creatures, before looking in the hole, that they yelled.

“Y/N NO!”

You jumped. And Steve and Robin screamed.

They ran right up to where you were, and without a second of hesitation, gripped onto their weapons and each other’s hand, as they leaped into the opening to the Upside Down behind you.

Following the demobats, you shivered as you walked through the upside down, the hellscape you thought you’d all defeated just a few days ago. Not that you could care too much that it was still here right now, not when you were too caught up in having lost your everything to attempt to do so. Now it seemed like it was all for nothing.

The demobats flew slowly so you could carry on at your pace, gliding above you as they lead you. Such a different temperament to when they were all... descending.

They were going to lead you past that spot. You knew it was coming up. So you had to do all in your power to keep your head down, and have your eyes still following the shadows of the monsters in this dim and hellish world. You couldn’t see Eddie like that. After three days. With all those wounds. You gently stroked your healing arm, nervously. And if you did look and he wasn’t there... You didn’t realise you’d been hyperventilating until you heard your own breath.

The noise finally louder than your own thoughts, upon noticing you quickly fought to regain control, a hand on Eddie’s necklace pressed to your chest as you sped up a little, it giving you some bravery as his picture, his gift, reminded you of why you were being brave, and following the demobats as you focused on breathing. They’d already destroyed his body when he was alive, you didn’t want to think of anyone hurting your boy more even after his suffering was supposed to have ended...

Steve and Robin followed close by, weapons ready, bodies never not touching each other, wanting to stay side by side to not be separate, so their platonic other half wouldn’t be hurt. Keeping them safe. Following you silently, as they scanned the place you were heading.

Truthfully, Steve and Robin don’t know what they would do without each other at this point. They’re the only one who... They almost lost each other, so many times the last couple of weeks. It really seemed like they could never rest, now they were back here again. Arms brushing even as they try to stop their weapons from clanging. They’re going to get each other, and you, out of here, together.

They make that promise to themselves each time they make eye contact with their best friend, while they both follow you covertly.

Your breath became a little stuttery as the demobats swooped closer, more at your shoulder height now, and you were lead to an opening, like a rock formation, maybe even a cave, in the woods. Not like the one Eddie used to take you though. This one was bigger... and you’d never felt frightened being with Eddie.

Not until the end.

Now as you saw who was waiting in the entrance, you’d never felt fear like it. Again, until you remembered how you had with Eddie. How nothing could be worse than that memory. And you felt rage, as you were face to face with the human, and smiling, form of Vecna. Alive, and waiting for you, with patience and intrigue.

“Hello y/n.”

You wanted to scream. That’s all you wanted to do. Your anger, your fear, your guilt from your entire life, the way you’d lost Eddie, how unfair it was for him to still think of himself the way he did when he died, when he was one of the best people out there, the way Eddie had died, a hero, just to help defeat this man. This monster. And here he was standing, smiling at you. Both alone.

You wanted to run over there and punch and claw and kick at him until your lungs were raw and your tears made you blind. But better instincts kicked in, and even with all your rage, you knew what was happening here was not right. Your feet took a step back on the, now vineless, rocks, but a woosh of wind from those monster creatures behind you pushed you forward.

Instead of cruelly thinking to yourself how these mutts would be the death of you just like your love, you kept moving forward. And you stood in front of Vecna, Henry, 001, Peter, whatever, you stood in front of him, and you did not falter.

“Why aren’t you dead?”

A smile blossomed through his teeth, and the demobats stayed quiet, behind you, by the entrance. As Vecna circled a position of stones laid by his feet, you circled too, never wanting to let him get you off guard.

“Well that’s a lovely greeting. And here I was wanting to be your friend.”

Robin held her hand on the back of Steve’s, seeing him bouncing in place ready to burst in and tear you out of there, as they got to the entrance upon hearing voices. Both of them felt nearly as awful as you did, seeing Vecna back, alive, smiling. But they stayed put, waiting to see what was happening, even though it killed the both of them to watch him close to their friend. The trauma locked away as they determined to stay strong in this moment for you. They knew you’d need it.

“I’m not going to be friends with you.” You spat, your teeth grit so hard in your mouth you were starting to taste blood. That or the memory of this place was bringing back old senses falsely alerted.

“Oh no? Well that’s a shame. Not even when I’m here to give you a gift?” Vecna cooed, his head tilting, still never taking his eyes off you.

You stopped walking now. Blinking, you took in his words. They were of course teasing, but the actual meaning didn’t seem so to you. You’d met this more human version of Vecna in visions he’d given you before. When you were all at war with him. This seemed like some sort of form in front of you, not just in your mind, although you knew Steve, Robin and Nancy destroyed his physical body. But here was what was left of him. And you could tell his words had some truth behind them.

“What would you have for me?” You questioned, knowing there was only one thing you’d want. Knowing, you didn’t know enough to be able to tell if he could actually give you that, in any way, at all.

Until his words worked with your thoughts, perfectly.

His eyes shone, and his smile never once faded, as Vecna answered you “The only thing you truly want.”

Your heart thumped, a ticklish feeling in your chest like electricity. Feeling it was hard to move your fingers, or your feet, or even to move at all. Just stood there in the face of Vecna’s proposal.

“Eddie’s dead.” The words hurt to say, but you couldn’t afford to be weak around him.

“Mm, right now yes, Eddie is.” Vecna tilted his head, some spark of delight in the conversation. A twinkle of knowledge. “As dead as all the others you and your friends lost. But Eddie doesn’t have to stay that way.” Vecna could practically feel your emotions rushing hot through your body. And he loved it. “What if that were to change? What would you do, to bring Eddie back?”

You tugged Eddie’s shirt further down your shoulders, trying to wrap yourself in it, hoping he’d protect you from this cold chill you weren’t so sure was just to do with the Upside Down. “You can’t do that.”

“OF COURSE I CAN!” Lightning boomed and struck wildly outside. You gasped shrilly as you span to see it, the red and white flashes like claws striking the sky, the two demobats flying and squawking up above the cave like formation’s high ceiling, in place. Unable to see Robin and Steve ducking down, cradling their weapons and each other at this display.

You’d noticed the lack of vines, only two demobats here, but the lighting, his form being here... Clearly Vecna was back in business. If not slightly stunted by you and your friends escapades. By Eddie’s help. Maybe that’s why he had ‘devolved’ to making deals with you.

Vecna calmed as the storm did, a tonal blue outside, even if still dark, as he smoothed back his wavy blonde hair. Smiling at you once again.

You took a step closer, your eyes squinted and questioning on him, but your mind only swirling with Eddie’s face again. Not the vision Vecna had shown you, but your own thoughts. Eddie right back at home, with you, as he deserves to be.

“What’ve you got to lose?” Vecna asks, his voice a soft fry. “I know why Nancy Wheeler took that gun off you so quickly when you got back. Surely you’d do anything to bring Eddie back, where he rightfully belongs. So young to be torn away.”

You swallow. Hands trembly, but body firm, as you remembered the past three days of torment. Knowing how you would’ve give your life for him, right then and there, but you couldn’t go back and change things. How you might’ve even been able to live with yourself tearing the whole town apart, if only Eddie had survived it. And if Vecna has even a chance of what he says he can, what wouldn’t you give?

“You... Can you really do that?” Hope, for the first time in three days, is layered in your voice. Deep under your show of strength, and concerned distrust. But it’s there enough for Vecna to be able to discern it immediately. He knew it’d be there anyway. You really were so easy for him to get.

“My sweet soul, of course I can. Why would I invite you to my home if I couldn’t do what I’m telling you?” His hand goes to his heart, and yours clench tightly by your sides. “You know you’re special to me. Of course I’ll help you out y/n.”

Steve and Robin move forward, weapons in hand, only to be shocked into silence as the demobats swoop out of nowhere in front of them. No squawking or biting or anything, just blocking them, which to your two friends, was infinitely more scarier once they realised.

Especially once they saw that smirk on Vecna’s face, like he knew. And as he took more comfortable steps towards you.

“Think of it as me turning a new leaf. Helping the miserable, the lonely, and depressed, such as yourself y/n.” He smiled charmingly.

Your jaw flexed to the side as you frowned. Your eyes never leaving Vecna, not that he wanted the opposite, as he stood happily close to you now, explaining finally why he’d summoned you here.

Maybe helping to bring light to why you’d followed so willingly, also.

It’s true you were all those things, but you didn’t think Vecna was turning around so quickly.

Vecna alluded from explaining for a few more seconds, instead pacing in front of you with a coy smile on his face, his finger tapping at his chin. “I know I haven’t been... the loveliest to you y/n. You or your loved ones. They weren’t kidding when they called me, well, a bitch.” He chuckled softly.

You almost could too. You made some kind of sound. Remembering how common a nickname it had been for your party. At least, for a little while. Before.

“But I mean it. This once.” He held his finger up, in front of his nose. “Call it what you like, a change of heart, mending my ways, repenting for my sins, seeing the light, all that shit.” He swivelled sharply, standing still in front of you, hands behind his back, head leaned forward to you.

You stood your ground. Even though his smile reminded you of how... close Vecna had seemed to like to get to you in the couple of visions he gave you. You were surprised when Nancy said he’d acted slightly differently towards her in her vision. Eddie had chimed, more like feared, that maybe you were a ‘favourite’ of his. Which is why he picked you to have those visions a little more than the other four young adults around you.

But now it didn’t matter. Not if he could help bring Eddie back. You were listening to every word intently.

“I can bring Eddie back to you. Fully. The way he was.”

You folded.

Your knees went weak. Having to catch yourself before you could visibly stumble too much in front of him, but also so uncaring to that, now he’d said what he’d said. “Really? You really can? Bring Eddie back properly? Not like a... a zombie, or a possessed ‘puppet’ of yours or-“ your voice was wobbling.

“No just like he was before. Exactly the same Eddie as you know, that is for certain.” Vecna nodded. “Of course, there’s a few caveats to that.”

Your breath flew out your lungs. You didn’t trust Vecna for a second. But the thought of Eddie actually being able to come back... To be brought back to life again...

Steve and Robin dodged through the demobats at hearing this, hearing your voice and knowing what it meant. But they only got a step before the monstrous creatures were back again, this time their wings outstretched in front of the two, and snarling dangerous looks on their faces as they hissed.

“Caveats?” You asked, your eyes tracking Vecna widely as he circled around the pebble grouping on the ground, looking up from them, before motioning you closer with a beckoning finger.

“I can bring him back for three days. The same amount of time he was gone. But don’t worry! Besides anything else, I personally assure you, that if you agree to this, and do everything you need to, that I tell you to do, no matter even if you don’t fulfil the contract in the end, Eddie will stay alive for the rest of his natural life. As if he’d never been so brutally ripped apart alive and murdered in the first place.”

You shivered at his words, and you saw his teeth glimmer in response as his lips stretched further in a smile. But he seemed serious, at least, about that part being true.

“Well, he’ll have a long life granted if he doesn’t, I don’t know, get hit by a car while drunk, or falsely shot for a crime he didn’t do, I’m not making him immortal. Just bringing him back. To you.”

You couldn’t even care about how those last two words were practically crooned at you by Vecna. A man who, you hadn’t really figured out, before he was ‘killed’. You knew Hopper had come back as Sheriff to clear Eddie’s name, although too late, even if it gave some peace to Wayne. But what Vecna was offering...

“However, Eddie won’t have his memories of you.”

This shot your head straight up. Your eyes bulging and your heart stuck in your throat, as you received this information.

Yes, you would do anything to bring Eddie back. And he said just agreeing and doing what he asked right now would mean Eddie would stay alive even past those three days. But the thought of him not knowing who you were... if you weren’t in this situation, with this monster, tears would surely be in your eyes. Vecna wanted to explain his plan it seemed though, so you never got too long to ponder over certain specifics he said.

“By the time the sun sets on the third day he’s back, you need to receive something off of Eddie. Something which will bring his memories back of you, and let you both live out the rest of your lives, as if none of this... nastiness,” Vecna held your hand in both of his, patting, before stroking over the fresh scar across your forearm, “had ever happened...”

You, slowly, pulled your hand away. Still listening, but not wanting to piss off Vecna. His blue eyes shot sharp into yours the moment you even started to pull away however. And even though it did make your heart jump, you held your own hand instead, putting it down by your middle, and carried on trying to get all the information you needed for Eddie. “What do I need to get from him?”

Vecna smiled again. You weren’t sure if it was because he was closer, so you could see him more, but this smile felt different. And as he spoke, his voice was so much more softer, as he practically whispered to you “True loves kiss...”

You shoved his chest, backing up a few steps. Vecna looked offended, brushing off his white shirt, while you felt nothing but loathing rile up in you. “Are you serious? How old do you think I am, six? What-“

“Stop talking and listen y/n.” He snapped coldly again, his lips thin, and face sharp.

You did as he said. Closing your mouth, but continuing to stay those few feet apart. Your distrust and despite for him growing more and more.

“What I’m saying is true. I’m experimenting with some new power. And who better to try it on than, you?” He sighed, and the way he looked you up and down made you sure he’d be stroking your cheek right now if he was still so close.

“You poor, desperate, thing. Willing to do anything for your poor Eddie, even make a deal with me.” He sighed folornly at you.

You’re unsure if you’ve ever seen him actually almost enjoying himself. Even while still seeming annoyed he wasn’t controlling all your outcomes like you’re sure he’d love to. Although with how close you were to killing him, you guess him being so close to oblivion might have shaken things up slightly.

“What would you get out of bringing Eddie back?” You ask, genuinely curious because surely he doesn’t expect you to think he’d do this out of the kindness of his heart. He’d never shown any liking towards Eddie. He and his bats were the reason he was dead. He killed him.

Vecna paced one more step, before turning to you, and a dark look you’d seen in his eyes too many times in your short experience with him, flamed once more. “Chaos. Power.”

You inhaled sharply, holding that breath as Vecna walked closer, his mouth rambling along with his twisted mind. “Putting everything out of place for once. Changing human nature so it’s not so destructively and uselessly linear.” Vecna riled up, talking faster and darker and louder and confident. “The chaos of putting someone living again back on the earth who wasn’t before, who’s body was going to rot in this place, bringing him back to live his life on that ground again, doesn’t that show my power?”

You weren’t sure you were supposed to answer. You just watched him. Eventually, a small curl upwards of his lips caught your attention. “Of course, using ‘true loves kiss’ as an end all seems quite powerful, for someone like me to do also. Although there’s another reason that is part of the seal.” He partly explained, and you retained it to memory to make sure that was answered later.

“But it’s not just what I get out of it, it’s what I need before I... allow you and Eddie to be my show of power, and I give you this gift.” He smiled charmingly.

A sick feeling crawled through your veins.

“Of course. I can’t believe we got this far into talking without discussing payment.” You rolled your eyes, your arms coming to cross over your chest, even if your mind and soul was open to what he was saying right now.

But you know Vecna’s tricks. You know his soul. If he even has one. And you dryly chuckle, nodding slowly. “I got it, my life for his, right?” You shake your head, biting your lip, with still some sort of smile on your face at the twisted irony.

You wouldn’t go down to Vecna. For the sake of Eddie’s memory.

Not unless there was absolute certainty...

Because while you would, you would do anything for Eddie, in a heartbeat you would trade your life for his, you do not trust Vecna to uphold his end of the bargain, especially in a situation where you can’t check if he has or not.

“No no no that’s child’s play.” Vecna says quickly. Easily brushing off the notion, which you thought was a stickler. You are surprised, and it definitely keeps you listening, with the thought of you and Eddie being back together seeming not so much like a dream anymore.

“That’s child’s play,” he repeated, spat, “swapping one life for another. I told you y/n I want to show power.”

‘Eddie, Eddie, Eddie’

It’s all you can think about. It was louder than your own thoughts. But you tried to make sure none of this was a trick, although you were sure it was in some way. You knew what he was like, what he had done to El, what he could do to you, you tried to be smart enough to make sure Eddie would come back alive, or you’d be able to kill Vecna right here right now.

“Okay. So what do you want?”

Vecna takes those steps closer in your personal space now. You stand strong. But when his eyes slowly linger, down to your throat, and his hand twitches large by his sides, you can’t help but gulp. Your anxiety actually making it worse. Your veins fluttering in your neck as your eyes tracked his from staring at it, to slowly trailing back up to your own, and his lips spreading into a smile as he spoke up, loudly and clearly.

“Your voice...”

You lean your front back, your neck and head extended that way too, as your own hand comes to rub tenderly over your neck. Realising now as you tried to speak, just how hard it sometimes could be. “M-My voice?”

He nods, his eyes flipping from your hand on your neck, back up to yours. “Just for three days.” He poses. As if it’s that simple.

You weren’t the only one struck by this revelation though.

“Y/-!” Steve and Robin tried to call out for you simultaneously. Their weapons pushing back against the demobats, even if they were still several feet away by the entrance.

They were quickly shut up though, as the few withering vines that were left snapped to attention, and coiled themselves throughly over Steve and Robin’s mouths. Wrapping around their bodies enough so they couldn’t fight back, as the ends twisted and turned to shut them up.

Both friends facing each other, terrified, and looking back to you, who still hadn’t noticed your friends who would’ve talked you out of something so dangerous, having followed you, to help you. Terrified not just for themselves but because they knew what you were going through. And that you were fragile.

Luckily for them the vines didn’t squeeze. They just held them there. As if they themselves, were focused only on waiting for your response.

You kept rubbing your neck, thinking about how your breath sounded, how you used to chat and sing and laugh with Eddie. Why Vecna would need or want that. All these thoughts flowing through your head, that and still ‘Eddie, Eddie, Eddie!’, but you had to use your voice while you can, and ask him at least one thing importantly.

“But without my voice, how will I get him to remember me? Or- or fall in love with me again?”

“You’ll have your looks!” Vecna says, in a way that sounds oddly unlike him, but also as if he’s mocking you, which does seem slightly more in character.

“That pretty face will do wonders...” He hums, his lips pressing together at the end of his sentence as he looks at you.

You feel that chill in the air again.

“And who needs words, y/n? I’m sure you can attempt multiple methods of yours. Eddie’s kind, isn’t he? That’s what you’ve been trying to teach all the others, in your backwards town, in that ignorant world.” Vecna talks, as if spreading a teaching to you.

You definitely know how he feels about the majority of humanity. Having only interacted with few in his existence, he may be more inclined to inform opinions on those he has met. Including, to varying degrees, you and Eddie.

“I’ve watched you, you’re smart, you’re resourceful, you’re... peppy.” The way Vecna enunciates that last word seems to contain a meaning you can’t be bothered to decontstruct right now.

“It will hardly matter if you and Eddie are truly soulmates, will it?” Vecna asks you, as if he is serious which you know he is not. He seems to twist into showing his discontent for yours and Eddie’s lovey dovey semantics as he moves on, with a smile. “Besides, even without dialogue, I’m sure you can use some body language to entice Eddie back.”

You look at Vecna with disgust. Eddie is not like that. He isn’t, not was you still think with relief, with hope, even as you scowl at the monster who was the reason he was dead. Especially when the way Vecna said it, how he looked you up and down, how this was one of the few times any of you would ever see him smile, it made your skin crawl.

You’d say you knew what men could be like, but you would not call Vecna a man. Not even when he was before. He’s always been a monster. But Eddie is not like that. He wouldn’t see you like that, he didn’t. And your Eddie is not a monster either.

Vecna has that look on his face again. The curious one, where he tilts his head. Even when he seems like he’s trying to be ‘playful’, he just always looks full of anger to you.

“Oh come on y/n. I’ve seen it up there. You don’t need your voice. I mean surely, not for Eddie right?” Vecna twists and twists his words. His eyebrows raising as does the corner of his lips, revealing those shark like teeth, whenever he sees you being pulled in by him.

“Men up there don’t like the girls who gossip and yap and bore, at least, that’s what I heard.” He squints his eyes, smiling as he takes another step forward. You think his eyes are shark like too.

You know he doesn’t know Eddie. It’s very clear especially with his words. Eddie and you used to talk, and talk, and talk. You both loved having someone to just talk to, about anything on your mind, for hours at a time; someone who understood what it was like to want to, someone who listened.

When you took a step back, Vecna changed up his method.

“Eddie though, now he never avoids conversation, he is impressed with how you keep up with him, how you can listen and entertain, how you two fit so well even when talking together unendingly, don’t you love that about him? Do most men live up to Eddie Munson?” Vecna asks you, as if he’s curious for your answer. Not just trying to manipulate you.

You notice he uses the word ‘is’ for Eddie. But you also notice the word ‘live’. Your head feels like it’s burning, everything feels so confusing right now.

Robin and Steve struggle to yell behind you.

“But even Eddie would think you were cute, how could he not, still? He would dote on you just the same as before. Knowing Eddie, he might just trip as he fawns over you being so... quiet.” Vecna purrs, leaning forwards again, so close he can afford that last word to be mewled quietly. And with him breathing down at you, for you to still be able to hear him perfectly.

“If you hold your tongue, it may just save your heart.”

You gulp. Feeling like you’re about to choke on your own tongue.

Vecna lifts one thin finger, and so so gently, brushes it down your pulsing neck, right from the centre of your chin, down gentlemanly to the beginning of your collarbone. Removing his hand afterwards. “Don’t you want to win your prize y/n?”

You hate that your breaths are shaky. Because Vecna can hear them, he can probably feel them on his skin. If he really is here, which you suppose now he is, in some way, since you could feel him too. But you don’t want to gulp either, not this close. So you keep on breathing. Until you have enough air in your lungs to speak again.

“Eddie will remember me.” You say confidently. Certain in your meaning, although your voice not sounding quite as harsh as you’d want it to, although still induitible. Still confident, about Eddie, in front of Vecna.

“Sure.” Vecna squints his eyes as he nods. Backing up again, as he paces around his cave.

For a moment you’re begging to yourself that you didn’t piss him off. Because you need Eddie back. Then you find yourself pissed at not wanting to piss Vecna of all people off. But you swallow your emotions, with a gulp now he’s not looking, because Eddie is more important to you than anything.

You hate thinking this, but you would probably do anything Vecna asks you to do right now, all if it meant bringing Eddie back.

“I need something from you.” Vecna turns, his eyes not on you, but body pacing closer.

A shiver runs down your spine. But you force yourself to stay in place, for him.

“Something from you and Eddie. Parts of you.”

Your body completely freezes now, apart from your heart plummeting to your stomach.

You blink tears out of your eyes, ignoring the tickling of your eyelashes to keep your form strong in front of Vecna, even though now you’re presumably to be faced with your worst fear. Which was definitely not him...

“Where-“ you swallow shakily, your spit feeling vile in your own throat. “Where’s his body?..”

“No no no.” Vecna tuts at you, his finger shaking as he finally looks at you again, with that condescending narcissistic look you’re more used to seeing on his features.

“You’re darling. Not like that. I need something physical from you two, from when Eddie was alive of course. I presume you’ve heard of DNA by now?”

You had. Especially with all the snooping through files at the Creel place, you’d started doing a lot more scientific research then you ever would’ve done at Hawkins High. Especially when planning on how to prove Eddie’s innocence as a back up plan once you’d saved the town. Ultimately it didn’t end up saving him anyway.

You know what it is. The fact Eddie is currently dead you know all too well also. But Vecna can’t be asking the impossible of you this early on.

However when you start to ask, your jaw moving open in confusion, Vecna moves in again, just millimetres from you.

His elbow nearly brushing against your torso as he raises his hand. His eyes trained to your lips. While his hand moved upwards, and gently grabs your chin. His touch cold, but body presence emanating onto yours. Vecna’s thumb slides, caressing up your chin... but stopping before he can touch your lips.

Almost like he doesn’t want to contaminate them.

“There’s still traces of Eddie with you y/n. They will fade soon. Then so will Eddie.”

Your heart beats, trying not to suck in your lips, your body warming in thought you still have Eddie’s touch you on, his live touch. His last kiss still lingering with you, living on, even three days later. Even now he was gone.

The mix of your fluttering emotions tingling throughout your body doesn’t change the fact Vecna is still so close and grasping you, still looking to your lips with wicked desire.

Desire for his plans you’re sure. Although you’re not sure what else your lips may hold of interest to him.

“And that’s why our kiss can also break the seal?” You ask, chin upturned, mouth barely moving with his hold, but your eyes nonplussed at him, except for determination of your goal.

“True loves kiss.” He interrupts seriously. Moving his eyes to you, from your lips finally, although his fingers still graze under your chin. “They’re very different things. I need that to prove my power, love defeating death and all those things you don’t need to know about. So that’s what will break it in our little contract.” Vecna finally let’s go of you.

You rub your jaw with gritted teeth, while Vecna backs up a step, not before you take a breath.

“Why? Just for power?” You ask again. He did seem a lot weaker than before. Especially if he was just... talking to you like this, making a deal like he said. Then again, you thought he was dead. But if anything could bring Eddie back.

Vecna nods, but with a tilt in his head, hands held in front of him. “There is one last thing yes.”

He doesn’t need to take a step forward this time. He only leans in.

“If you don’t succeed, you belong to me.”

Robin and Steve barely have time to glance into each other’s panicked eyes, before their wrists and legs are fighting at the vines. Robin trying to grab a weapon from Steve’s bag even with her arm ensnared, Steve trying to kick a rock at one of the demobats hissing in his face, even though he’s terrified of the thing. Especially after seeing what they’ve done, taking a bite out of him, seeing Eddie’s body.

But no matter their panic they are clawing at the vines, Robin trying to stamp on one of the demobats tails, just to try and get your attention with the noise; Steve trying to bite through the vine coiled over his lips, while enticing a demobat to attack to hopefully bite at his restraints instead.

The set of best friends yelling furiously into the vines only smothering their cries, not aiming to kill them this time, which partly makes matters worse.

Panic pumps through their body like ice cold blood, dread oozing in their stomachs, fear causing both of them to strain towards the other, their eyes desperate as they look at their best friend, because they know what your answer will be if neither of them get free.

It’s not a question of what you say. It’s if they can stop you in time.

They need to get you to see them now, to get you away, to do something. Both fighting hard for you, like they always would, how they try to. If one of them can just save you, after they failed to save Eddie.

Looking directly at Vecna, lingering in the silence of his offer, you take two steps back. Finally able to breathe, where he wouldn’t be able to draw you in even more. Breathing air not surrounded by him, taking steps back so you can come back to your reality, to what you’re actually surrounded by.

You followed demobats, monsters, the creatures that killed Eddie down here. To the Upside Down. After having a vision, like the ones he gives people before he kills them. You’re in some kind of cave surrounded by skies that are too blue with red lightning. And here you have the devil himself offering you a deal, in front of you. Surrounded in this nightmare place, seeing clearly you have been lured into the dark by the monster you’ve been fighting so hard against; with no Eddie in sight.

Even taking in your surroundings, the back of your mind only knows it’s not right because Eddie isn’t here with you.

“I don’t know.” You take another step, then two, back. Looking at Vecna as suspiciously as you were before he pulled you in. Dread seeping in your own stomach, your hands twitching by your sides.

You could imagine he was tricking you right now. That Vecna couldn’t actually do this. And why would he want that if you do fail? Or maybe that is to motivate you to absolutely not do so? Importantly, if you do complete everything he asks, what would he do with his growing power, if all went well?

You’d sacrificed Eddie for this town once... you didn’t think you’d do it again. That part wasn’t a problem in your mind, not after you’d lost Eddie once.

You feel bad for thinking it, because you know Eddie wouldn’t want you to, God, fuck, you know Eddie would be shaking you awake, screaming at you right now to fucking run, to not be a hero, to not let anything happen to you. Maybe he was yelling it right now somewhere, banging at whatever gates were keeping you two apart. You could almost see him in front of you, see his hands on your shoulders, those dark eyes in yours as he screams at you. But that’s an almost, Eddie isn’t here, you can’t see him. But if you knew Vecna would truthfully bring him back - you’d do anything right now right here with him.

Vecna sighs.

You’re not sure if you blink, or keep your eyes closed so dissociated in your mind from the moment you lose time, but you open them with a start when Vecna is suddenly stroking your cheek, his blonde waves tickling your temple as he coos to you.

Drawing you in as your knees weaken towards him...

“Ohhhhh poor confused little y/n. A life so full of tough choices. Everything so much harder now you don’t have your Eddie by your side...”

Tears trickle past your lips, ones you hadn’t even noticed in your eyes. And you hiccup quietly a little as Vecna helps lift you steady, just with that one cool and long palm cupping your cheek.

“But I know what you want.” He whispers softly to you, his voice a rumble.

Your cries are small, in nature and in volume. But with Vecna this close, helping you stand, a lock swats at a warm tear on your cheek, brushing it coincidentally away.

That, for some reason, is what pulls you back.

Tears stopping, even with shiny eyes, you pull back silently. Not stopping walking back this time, noticing the surprised look in his eyes as he watches you retreat. And you don’t stay longer. You lean to turn around, continuing to go - you have to get back. Robin and Steve are waiting. Dustin can’t lose you too down here. All your friends have already dealt with too much trauma. Joyce has been working so hard to save you. Wayne needs someone to mourn with. Your family. Eddie!

“You- you’re tricking me.” You say, voice weaker than you’d want it to be but you’re not controlling your emotions anymore. Your thoughts are finally catching up. As your eyes shine in distrust and guilt up at Vecna.

“Tricking you? No- no I don’t trick. I’m trying to help you right now y/n- I am the only one who’s helping you! Truly doing what you’ve been begging someone for, to listen to what you’ve been screaming for.” Vecna’s head twitches as he tilts it. Confused and irritated over how no one ever seems to believe him. Or understand his ways. He’s helped you, and Eleven, and people always, always-! “I promise.” He speaks. But his voice carries that indignant vex from everyone’s disbelief in it still.

Your gut riles and tightens. “This is wrong.” You say, turning further as you walk, shaking your head of the mourning thoughts of Eddie making you numb to common sense, to that anxiety in your brain that’s been screaming at you to run away this entire time.

Thunder roars above you, and you keep your head down, huddling yourself as you keep walking, your skin crawling at the fact you can feel Vecna’s anger behind you.

“Fine y/n! Forget about the world, and love!” He sneers, the air howling without fresh wind. “Go back ‘home’ to your ‘friends’ without him, and never see Eddie again!”

Those words makes you shoot around.

Vecna smirks. He knows he’s got you.

The two demobats swoop out, clearly they were just ahead of you, in the dark close by, but you turn quickly to follow their direction, not seeing what they were distracting you from as you’re turned around. Facing a much bolder Vecna than you’d seen yet.

“Go on and decide y/n.” He sneers, only turning into a smirk as your legs carry you back towards him. “All it will cost is your voice.”

The way Vecna describes it... Eddie is more important than your voice. You’d give anything for him. Even if you were to be without him, if you made this deal, no matter what happened to you, Eddie would be back.

There is no other possible way your Eddie Munson could be alive again.

Vecna stands close to your side, pulling out some kind of contract on a folded piece of paper for you. You raise your brows, even though your mind is fully on Eddie, a twinge of disbelief is shown on your face. “A contract? Seriously?” You ask, genuinely unsure.

Vecna simply shoves it into your hands. He seems to get some type of glee when you hold it. “I need to get that DNA of yours and Eddie’s again, so it was either using this, or...”

His hand running across your cheek, fingertips stretching past your ear gets you to look up from the words on the paper, into his eyes. Unfortunately, they’re back on your mouth.

You can tell it’s purposeful this time though. Vecna seems to delight in making you wriggle. A toothy smile stretching beneath his pink lips when you shrug out of his hold, placing his hand back to his side.

Easily doing so. Your quickly rising and falling chest is for every other reason. As your eyes bore into the paper in your cold hands, knowing in it was the only possible future for Eddie Munson. Rising falling rising falling rising falling, as Vecna talks and talks and talks, while you read and breathe and beat.

“What happened to Eddie is sad. But it happened. Your boyfriend is dead. If you want a miracle to happen you’ve got to pay the price and let me help you y/n. Take a deep breath. Look at it. Who’s around you here to help?! No one! Eddie would be here! But he can’t! You let him die!!!”

You screw your eyes closed. You can’t listen to that you can’t think you can’t not do this you can’t leave Eddie again you can’t do that to him you have to do this with him you have to you can’t not see Eddie again you can’t abandon Eddie to die you have to save him you have to help him now you have to listen you can’t stop listening you can’t let him die.

Vecna smiles up to his demobats, raised above you both in sharp victory.

You have to listen to him you can’t let Eddie die you have to do this for them.

His hand snatches out and grabs your necklace from your collar, throwing it to the ground. It doesn’t break, but opens, to the image of your Eddie, so clear even on the ground like this, smiling up at you. At you.

“This poor-“

Your eyes stay on Eddie’s face.

“Poor-“

Your eyes move to the paper.

“Soul.” Vecna coos.

You don’t realise Vecna’s calling both of you this same thing.

You quickly sign the contract, scribbling your signature on it fast, your blood pumping as you make the choice to be brave. You will bring Eddie back no matter what. Even if you’re giving him to the world, and not yourself anymore. You’re not thinking about you. You can’t even see the words, only Eddie. You need to save Eddie.

You press a kiss to the end of your signature, the wet ink moulding with the spit of your lips. Quickly pulling back the contract and looking at it all. Noticing your wavy signature, not realising until you’d actually looked at what you were writing, you’d signed it with red ink. Until you saw the splotch where you’d kissed it at the end of your name.

Vecna’s eyes had not left you once.

As you’re staring wide eyed at what you’ve just signed, your mouth opening a little in shock, red dotting your lips, immediately a hand is around your neck. You’re cut off with a choke as Vecna grabs you.

He pulls you in close, his nose bumping into your cheek as you panic to stay on your feet, gasping as you feel your neck expand in his cool hands. Your own going to his wrists, feeling the material of his white shirt, his cool skin, the little hairs on his arms, as you try to dislodge his hand a little. Not fighting back as much as you should, one because he was letting you breathe, but mostly because you were willing to let anything happen for this to work.

Suddenly Vecna grabbing you by your throat isn’t as much of an issue, especially since he’s not actually cut off any oxygen, just held you in his grasp; because now you’re distracted by the room spinning, and that definitely isn’t from lack of air flow.

Looking down at your feet you can see the both of you are spinning, and just like Max did, just like Chrissy did, you’re up in the air. Only this time conscious, and with Vecna.

His eyes leer in close as you both raise some inches, continuing to move, his face serious, as his two demobats screech above you. The sound ignited you with terror, panic and trauma from associating it with the sound, the smell, of Eddie’s ripping flesh; and yours under your bandage. But these bats now, they sound like a song out of order, there’s chaos and melody to their shrieks.

Each time you get closer to the sound of their yowls as they fly in the air though, they just raise some more. The storm of the upside down blocking much of your view as you don’t even feel the movement anymore, although that may just be to do with your heart lurching as you go along with this plan, and your eyes held tight on Vecna now.

You feel weird about what’s happening, managing to grab your necklace off the ground without even looking, before you were raised any higher, the winds in the place you thought wouldn’t have any helping you, as you manage to thread your finger through the clasp, small pebbles scratching your arm. You hold it tight before your lose it, the pendant with Eddie’s picture in grasped protectively in your palm, because you know things are happening now.

Your eyes back on Vecna, not fighting his hold on you anymore, just fiercely gripping your necklace of Eddie, you gasp. Breathing deeply as you commit yourself to everything you’re doing right now, planning all this that definitely is trouble, but for Eddie’s life, for what’s right, for the chances he was never given in life and you were fighting to give him now, even though you know what’s happening is wrong, your determination to keep going outweighs any fear that’s howling. Eddie always liked you being a hero, until his final day.

Vecna pulls back distracting you from your head full of Eddie, as you watch his blue eyes move further. His grip loosening, causing you to squeeze onto his wrist. Even as he fully let’s go, you stay in the air. And your breath finally comes back to you when he orders “Sing.”

Words escape you. The only thing you can think of, the only song that seems appropriate in this situation, melancholic, hopeful, and full of meaning and memories of Eddie, is that tune you always used to sing to him.

So you follow Vecna’s instructions.

You sing the melody of the tune you sang to Eddie so many times. When you’d stroke his dark bouncy curls on the couch, once full of life. When he’d hide his face into your chest because he felt safer crying there. When he couldn’t sleep because he was afraid someone would find him and hurt him. When he was afraid of the world. When he was afraid of not being able to show everyone who he really was, before he died.

“Keep singing!”

Vecna yells over the noise inside the rocky structure, noise you’d barely even noticed with your mind so full.

Your focus on the song that was always for Eddie, being for Eddie is such a different way now, as you put your whole chest into it. Raising your voice, and trying to remember the notes just right, even if they didn’t matter to Vecna, they mattered to you and Eddie.

You squeeze your pendant of Eddie tight, willing yourself to be strong enough to do this properly, to be brave for Eddie, like you always were when you hummed this tune for him, to make sure the world didn’t let him down again. You need him to stay strong, you hold onto your necklace with everything you’ve got.

Suddenly that’s when you see it. In the darkness of the Upside Down, of the dark blues and grey clouds and black shadows of this place, you see a ball of light. And as the light moves from your body towards Vecna’s greedy gaze, you’re hearing your own voice getting further away, but feeling your vocal cords move in time. It gives you this sick feeling.

Like something unnatural is being lost, that you can’t produce anything. A sick feeling in your throat, but nothing coming out. That what you’re doing right now, is effecting over there instead. That light should be in your body, and it’s, you’re, moving towards your worst enemy.

Vecna snatches your necklace from your hand, leaving you horrified. You need it back. The picture of Eddie laying close to your heart always, smiling like he was before, looking right at you, from the gift he gave you. Vecna’s hand burning cold on your skin, the chains cutting into your palm, as he steals that away from you.

But then you see your light with your voice going towards Eddie, instead of him, and suddenly, you feel more okay...

Vecna snaps the pendant shut, and you immediately start to feel dizzy.

A rush of dark smoke and red and blue lightning suddenly make outside the cave like structure so crazy, you’re even looking away from Vecna. But when they swirl around you, the smoke and the demobats flying around both you and Vecna in a close loop, you’re looking back to him with horror. Nothing matters but Eddie, but this power floors you, even if you already understood what you’ve signed yourself up for, and still do. Vecna’s using it all on you, he and Eddie are counting on you.

The demobats horrible screeches don’t outweigh the crash and rumble of the hurricane of smoke and lightning you’re trapped in, with your nemesis encaptured right with you. His smirk not on you anymore, but down at your necklace he flips between his fingers. You can only hear the demobats, seeing only smoke and lighting, and Vecna, when the demobats come swooping closer to you both. And then everything is black.

Steve and Robin are horrified as they watch on. The vines immediately withdrew once the smoke started surrounding yours and Vecna’s feet, and everything was too loud and far for you to hear.

Steve helped Robin up, and they grabbed their weapons and they just watched in awe. Weapons ready and pointed, but no sight of you in the powerful haze of elements.

Nothing had attacked them yet, and that left them strong enough to do this, to fight for you if you wouldn’t. But that meant they had to find you first. And now you were trapped up there with Vecna. Robin and Steve couldn’t even hear each other screaming your name, with the booms of thunder and rumbling of this whole world surrounding everything. Let alone you being able to hear them, and know you’re not all on your own.

Until finally, the smoke clears, and you’re only a few feet off the ground, compared to where Steve and Robin were searching up for you before. Luckily enough time for Steve to dive and scrape his barely healing back to hell as he catches you. Landing you on top of him as you fall, which he accentuates with only a cry.

Robin immediately grabs at you, yelling for Steve, as they both hit your cheeks. Robin standing atop with a weapon in hand, and Steve heaving beneath you as he leans over, with you snagged on his chest. Both increasingly hitting you, and shaking you, thunder still quaking as they quickly try and scream your name.

“Let’s go! Steve let’s go!” Robin yells out, red light filling the sky more than the blue cover, shadowing their faces as she helps fireman lift you off of Steve, just to get you up, before he’s on his feet.

“I’ve got them! Let’s go Robin!” Steve yells to her, both of them squinting their eyes from the flying dust and howling wind, as they lean their faces in close to yell. Their hands on each other, and on you, as they yell close to hurriedly plan their escape.

Steve throws you over his shoulder from where Robin was keeping your unconscious body up, and while he secures you quickly with his arm grappling your thighs, they both search around. Robin duel wielding, as Steve manages to hold you over his shoulder, and still hold his axe in another hand.

They can’t see Vecna. There’s no sign of him around. But they’ve got to get you out.

“The wooded path, we should go now!” Robin grabs Steve’s shoulder, both still squinting to see each other, and their way out, before she goes first, slightly lighter on her feet. While Steve still defends her sides, and your back.

Reminded of the time just three days ago he carried you out of the Upside Down like this. Thrown across his shoulder, but this time not kicking and punching and screaming, this time silent. That was worse for Steve. He didn’t think he could feel much worse, but the dejavu of three days ago, in these circumstances, was a lot for him. And this time, you’d managed to do something incredibly dangerous for Eddie, before your friends could stop you...

Both their faces looking to you occasionally, passed out over Steve’s back, your hair slightly obscuring you from Steve’s view, but Robin managing to assure/scare both herself and Steve as she repeats you’re still just out cold. With Steve at least able to feel your breathing over his shoulder, as his arm keeps tight hold of your legs draped on his chest.

Both of them keeping their weapons out in full battle mode as they rush to the exit you entered through, silencing their check ins with each other as the ‘weather’ down there stops, and the eerie quiet of the Upside Down loudens in a way, the closer they get to the exit back home. In a place like this, it shouldn’t be quiet. The two keeping hushed where they can knowing they can’t alert anything out there to the intruders in their space, especially with you unconscious in Steve’s hold.

What’s strange though, is that while they did miss their opportunity at seeing Vecna, nothing attacked any three of you on your way out either.

It let you pass.

#please lmk your thoughts and if anyone would be interested in pt2!#I’ve worked so hard and for so long on this so any feedback would be rly appreciated :) 💕 hope y’all enjoy!#Eddie Munson/reader #little mermaid au #Steve Harrington #Robin Buckley #Vecna #Eddie Munson #platonic stobin #Eddie Munson x reader #Eddie Munson fic #Eddie Munson angst #my fics #stranger things #Robin and Steve r in the middle pic bc it’s mostly them and Vecna in chptr1 bc it’s abt bringing Eddie back haha #I promise Eddie will be in all the other chapters after this this is just the set up 👀#11.8k

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autumnslance · 4 months

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Werlyt in Lorebook 3

So Werlyt gets a page expanding on its location and history a bit, to be expected as the new Encyclopaedia Eorzea 3 goes over both Shadowbringers and Endwalker content. What they do with its history as an Imperial province again paints Gaius in a better light...in ways we already knew were IC for him as established in earlier content, while also being straight up out of Machiavelli's The Prince in a way that makes complete sense for the Empire when dealing with conquered provinces, and how we've even heard before how some of them are ruled very much like native Garlean regions.

See, one of the oldest tricks in the literal book is you conquer a province, and especially if it proves unruly, you give it a nasty governor. Use them to root out the rebellious factions, while also tearing apart the old systems, stripping resources, crushing the populace, etc. THEN you send in a Reasonable Guy to take over who ousts the bad vicious leader, restores order, treats the people well, and so on. Now that new governor--and by extension his emperor for sending him--looks better in the eyes of the people, a problematic political/military rival has been killed/broken politically, the unruly elements have already been culled, and the people are just grateful for a reprieve from their misery. More acquiescent and "this isn't so bad after all."

Another famous literary example (and with a new movie a few months out) is Dune; once Harkonnen takes back Arrakis, he sends one nephew, Raban, who is literally nicknamed "the Beast", to be a horrible bully of a governor. His job is to root out the remaining loyal Atreides and quash the local Fremen. Then once Raban's atrocities were at their peak, Harkonnen meant to send in his heir, Feyd-Ruatha, to be the golden prince who would get rid of the problematic Raban (lethally if needed) and be accepted by the people as a decent leader. Of course, Dune's story rolls out differently, but the play is the same.

The Garlean Empire did the exact same thing in Werlyt.

For 30 years the subjugated nation was oppressed and stripped of resources. When the Empire's attention moved toward Othard and the military presence thinned enough a rebellion rose up, it was still crushed, but not before the previous viceroy was killed in the revolt.

Then Gaius van Baelsar came in and restored order. We already knew Gaius had a habit of appointing the right people for the job, regardless of race and social standing; he continued that in Werlyt, and was otherwise a good governor, working to ensure the populace was cared for, administered properly, even improved education and literacy rates. So after a few decades of crushing abuse...now Werlyt had a "reasonable governor" who treated them like people and took care of them, if still under the auspices of the Empire. They made it look like a better deal, and the previous guy was a mistake that shouldn't have happened.

This also tracks with pre-Praetorium Gaius as the "true believer" of Garlemald's Imperial mission of taming the "savage" lands and ushering them into the "civilized" ways of the Empire and adding those peoples' knowledges, cultures, skills, and might to the Empire to make everyone better. That "unity" aspect he and other leaders like Quintus van Cinna spouted while missing the hypocrisy. Gaius was a good governor because he thought that was the entire point--and then also led to his opposition of the Meteor Project. He never wanted to wipe Eorzea out, he wanted to bring it under Imperial control and govern it as he had Werlyt.

So for twenty years, Gaius was the reasonable governor getting good grades in cultivating Werlyt as a respectable and flourishing province of the Empire. Then he was sent to Ala Mhigo to conquer that, and through it the rest of Eorzea.

...And then Valens van Varro took over Werlyt and pretty much overnight undid everything reasonable a decent governor would do because of his jealousy over Gaius and his own ambitions for power, especially after the civil wars left the Imperial throne vacant. Also cuz again, they have to spend this branch of story making Gaius look better by making Valens cartoonishly bad at everything. Rather than trusting what they already wrote about a complicated man who truly believed in his mission until forced to see how he had been a pawn sowing misery his whole life. But they've tended to rewrite Gaius and his on screen characterization a lot as it is, and with Garlemald not getting an expansion of its own (they had considered it but ultimately worked its fall into ShB and EW), it feels like they hammer this point in Werlyt to speed run what was supposed to be an actual rehabilitation arc for the character.

And then it once again frames the quintent as rebellious heroes who thwarted Valens plans to use them and the Weapons project for his own ends and sure we'll let that go cuz the folks in Werlyt need something. They do have a named leader (Talbot Hunte) and a government set up and none of it really mentions Gaius, though we know they put him in charge of their military. Cuz yeah, he was one of their conquerers--but they also know that they can work with him and that he knows how to run an army effectively.

Also all the quintet are literally named "aan Baelsar" in their entries, though the main thing I noticed there was that Milisandia did in fact dye her hair red to account for the discrepancy in her child appearances in the various flashbacks. Apparently it was cuz she noticed Alfonse seemed very fond of one of their caretakers at the orphanage, and so Milisandia changed her hair to be the same color to try and get his attention, quietly pining for him for years but never letting him know about her not-quite-sisterly affections.

#final fantasy xiv #encyclopaedia eorzea #lorebook #sorrow of werlyt #gaius baelsar #shadowbringers #endwalker

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spearxwind · 2 years

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Oof I'm kinda scared to ask... Why do you not want to be an artist professionally?

Its just like, incredibly miserable in my experience.

Everyone wants their dream job of being paid to draw whatever the hell they want but 99% of the time you are hired and tasked to draw things that you don't have a lot of interest in, professionally speaking, and constantly getting your artistic efforts undermined by the rest of the team (this is esp. true in the videogame industry) artists always try to push for better designs and get their takes watered down for the sake of general public pleasing. Also you don't have a security blanket unless you're under long term contract. Most freelancers live gig to gig with the fear of not being able to support themselves if they don't take a job to take a break. Videogame and movie jobs arent stable because companies never keep the art teams, they are laid off and rehired whenever there is a new project

During my major, I drew nonstop for 4 years for class. Not always things I enjoyed, but also not always things I didnt like. In fact I enjoyed my major immensely! It was so fun. But the burnout is very, very real, and the workload was similar (even inferior to) regular art jobs. What happens if you like to draw in your off time? You spend your days making and pumping out art nonstop for hours, and then on your free time breaks you draw some more? I personally couldn't do it. I just wanted to do other things

And like.... I spent the first three years being told by teachers (people with stable, contract based jobs) how cool of a job it is to do art, and then the last year getting grilled on how insanely hard it is to make it out there. If you don't have connections, money, an audience, a studio, it's actually impossible. You need to be your own lawyer, abide by the very strict self employment rules that take a severe chunk out of your earnings. Do all of your finance/schedule/marketing etc while on top of that constantly producing work (I know there's people who can do it but, personally, I cannot) I really admire the people who were able to build themselves up as artists from the ground like this (because its definitely possible, just insanely hard)

Also, making something you love into your job ends up being miserable too. I experienced this with patreon, which I posted to as like a chill thing and it just got increasingly hard to make content for it or just post in general, even drawing my own ocs and sharing stuff about them started to feel like a chore.

Maybe it's just me though, this has just been my personal experience but yeah in general I realized I am immensely happier just keeping art as a hobby or its gonna suck my soul out (Since I already experienced it)

I don't mean to discourage anyone, I think the world in general needs more artists. But for that we would need to actually be taken seriously and valued, which sadly we are not, at all. And if there's anyone reading that is considering art as a job: it is absolutely grueling. It's not an easy job. Even if you desperately love art it can suck the life out of you and the joy for what you do

(As an extra sidenote. Artists are usually exploited using this mentality as well. That they are supposed to love their job. So they expect you to work your wrists off "For the passion". Dont fall victim to it)

#ask #anon #genuinely i just wanna share my stories and content. see others stories in turn and make friends about it #the desperate need to monetize everything that makes you happy is such an insidious mentality.#people need to learn that you can have hobbies without needing to monetize them. your joy has inherent value and you dont need to sell it #like... i need people to stop being like 'oh you are so good at art/crochet/writing you should sell things : )' it fucking sucks #there is a lot of nuance to the topic of course but im talking like. in general #doing art out of ones heart is always good but having to pump out content under the crushing wheel of capitalism and need to survive is not #this is about my experience with drawn art but this goes for any other artistic discipline #music... writing... etc. we are all in the same boat #sorry for the long winded answer and tags i am just so passionate about this #and especially as someone whos skill wasnt taken seriously until i started making money from it........ fuck that so fucking much #you are allowed to create. in fact you should create. without feeling the need to put a price on it #not everything needs a price tag to be valuable.#especially not your joy.

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stevenssticks · 9 months

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Steven blurb where he loves eating out reader, like his head is always between your thighs no matter what happens

OKAYYY i’ve been WAITING to answer this one for after i got back from vacation. now i’m ready to rock.

i know steven absolutely begs for it all the time. he’s just addicted to the taste of you. showering together? he will get down on his knees. push one of your legs up against the wall and eat you like that. watching a movie? you’re probably not gonna get through half of it without steven’s tongue inside you. sometimes the goal isn’t even to make you cum really quick. sometimes he just licks and sucks at you while you watch tv or read a book, your hand petting his hair while he moans into your pussy. going at his own pace and grinding himself into the bed, the base of the couch, his own hand, whatever. he also LOVES eating you out after he’s cum inside you. likes to lick himself out of you and make you cum again on his tongue after you’re all overstimulated and strung out for him.

sometimes (if you let him) he will pull out mid-fuck to go down on you again. he’s crazy for it. VERY messy with it. by the time he’s done with you he will have your juices running down his chin, on his cheeks and nose. his lips will be shining with it too. his eyes would be all hazy and his lids would be low as if he’s in some trance (sure as hell feels like he is). he’ll even eat you out on your period if you ask. just put a towel under you and he’s ready to go. he’s esp enthusiastic about this after he heard that orgasms help with cramps.

circling back, imagine you and steven cuddled up on the couch, watching some movie that was kind of just on one of the stations that you don’t really care about. steven of course has decided to completely abandon any effort to actually watch the movie and has started to suck on your neck, one hand wrapped around your waist while the other is rubbing the inside of your thigh.

“what do you want, baby?” you ask, and all steven responds with is a little moan, and then moving down off the couch and onto his knees between your now spread legs. he leans over you. resting his head on your abdomen and planting a kiss where your shirt has ridden up, looking up into your eyes with those big blue ones of his. you smile, knowing exactly what he wants: “go ahead, baby. make me feel good.”

that’s all the permission he needs; he drags your pants down your legs, first placing kisses to your cunt over your panties, even going so far as to sucking your clit right through the fabric, making your eyelids flutter and your mouth drop open. he’d drag your underwear down after, and start really going for it. starting with firm licks up the expanse of your pussy before going down to tongue fuck you nice and slow. he would grab the underside of your thigh and lift it up so one foot is planted on the couch, giving him better access and spreading you out for him. your hand would be planted in his hair, and you would go back to watching the movie and letting him take his time with you. over the dialogue on the TV you could hear steven’s little groans and whimpers, muffled by his face being buried in you.

the movie would end, and you would tune into the sound of a zipper being pulled down, and steven’s moans getting even louder. you look down to see steven’s hips grinding against the base of the couch, sending a wave of heat through you as you watch steven get off on giving you pleasure.

finally, steven moves to suck at your clit, his own hips moving faster as he tries to get you to orgasm before he does. he traces his tongue all around you, drawing tight circles and then going back to sucking with the pressure you like best. and then steven lifts one of his hands and pushes two fingers into your cunt, and you’re gone. white light flashes behind your eyelids and you grab steven’s hair in your hands to get leverage to grind onto his face as you reach your high while steven makes a mess of the couch. the two of you moan and groan through it, until you let go of steven’s hair and he’s leaving breathy kisses all over you, coming down from his own orgasm.

he looks up at you with tired, but satiated eyes, licking your spend off his lips and resting his head on your thigh. you lean back and tilt your head to the ceiling.

“holy shit.”

—

steven is a certified pussy eater i just know it ok

#guns n roses #gnr #steven adler #steviieeeeeee #aaaarrfghhhhjbnmm #yeah. i love him.#axl rose #izzy stradlin #slash #duff mckagan #asks and replies

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skunkes · 5 months

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You probably get this asked a lot but do you have any particular things you keep in mind when writing in your journal? I started recently and it's been great but I find that Only recapping my day gets to be a bit tedious (esp when I don't go outside much lol) so I was curious what you do to keep motivated with it ! Ur sticker layouts are always so cutes btw I'm very inspired by them ^_^💖

Yeah! I mainly journal for Memory Keeping as i have a weird obsession with wanting to keep track of anything/everything, so i just think of what future cheye would want to know, instead of just recapping day.

Makes me really sad bc in college all i had energy to write was like "ate x went to class went to mailroom went to class 2 had x for dinner 1 am now goodnight" and its like. What about. The whole rest of it!! What did u do who did you talk to when was it that you saw a raccoon irl for the first time!!! Were you stressing over assignments?? Which and why!!! I have 0 tangible, meaningful, memories of what happened now. Just sterile clinical ones. :(

I do track things consistently like my rating for the day, the time i woke up and the time i go to bed, what i ate, if i cried, along wit other personal stats (i like the numbers!). Sometimes I also dont Do anything in a day so i just focus on other things, like taking the opportunity to write about feelings a little bit, so future cheye Knows the state of mind i was in on a given day, or maybe talk about how I bought something and am excited to wear/use it

Not much happened today so I wrote about and included how my dad described the plot of to, and showed me, some scenes of The Untouchables 1987 today because a song always reminds him of that movie...

yesterday I wrote about how my sister and I are planning on trying some pillsbury cocoa rolls on thursday, since we couldn't today, and that I am Excited.

I don't know, its small things that I feel I'd appreciate in the future even if they seem silly or pointless right now...(and also good for keeping track of personal growth, as Im hoping I at one point get to pinpoint where my complaints about Not Wanting to Drive fade away from the entries. Ykwim?)

ITS KIND OF LIKE THAT ONE POST ON HERE...like "if you see this tag one delight from your day no matter how small". You ""force"" yourself to come up with something to pad the entry with, and I think it's small things like that that will be really telling of your time here, in the future ^_^ time capsule of the old you

like. Did you see something insanely funny? Did your best friend say something weird... Did the internet platforms you browse all rally over a war criminal dying... Is it still rainy and chilly like it was yesterday? Are you excited for your birthday even if its many months away... What series did you start rewatching? Did u get scared by a shadow while walking your dog...idk! Anything, everything

#anonymous #skunk mail #long post #and none of these things have to be super detailed either!#like i have a separate journal for Feelings Theses. feelings in my main one are just like ''man i feel #like ass about everything again. cried a lot.''#i thingk its also like. idk i dont like to bother my friends so i don't have anyone to share stuff wit but myself #so i write it in there ..ykwim...like im feeling happy today i saw something cool i really want ice cream!#<- shit i wouldnt say to a friend or stuff id post to my priv account as the thought came to me that nobody wld care abt either

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laxmiree · 1 year

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[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Entrapment date translation

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

“The artist once hoped to put the butterfly on a glass cover and keep it with him forever. But later, he discovered that even when he let the butterfly go, it flew back to him.”

“It gave him happiness he had never felt or imagined before.”

“I love you.”

“Everything about you, every time you approach me... makes my heart beat excitedly.”

“It makes me fall in love with you again and again... for countless times.”

Translation under cut

(T/N: VERY RECOMMENDED TO HEAR THE VOICE ACTING, ESP THE I LOVE YOU BC IT’S JUST *clenches fist* SO GOOD. BLESS XIA LEI FOR GIVING US THE MOST TENDER, LOVING, AND SEXIEST 我爱你. Anyway I subtitle this date on youtube(turn on CC!) and don’t forget to come back here if you want to read my rambling slash analysis about this date if you want to, I’ll put it on the bottom part of this post-)

[Part 1]

A breeze blew the balcony curtain, and the clear blue sky was intermittently visible through the gap.

The light and shadow of the lamp brushed over the meals on the table and also reflected on Lucien's clear and elegant profile.

I withdrew my gaze and gently rubbed my coffee cup. After a few moments, I couldn't refrain from sneaking another glance at Lucien.

I heard a soft sound of metal touching the porcelain plate. Lucien put down the knife with a faint smile in his voice.

Lucien: Seems like MC has been secretly watching me since this morning.

Lucien: Is there something you want to talk about?

My small movement got busted. I paused a little and calmly denied it.

MC: ...Nothing, I'm just a little curious about your current condition.

MC: After being together for so long, I rarely see you drink as much as you did last night…

[Flashback start]

Some time ago, our work at hand came to an end, and we finally had a chance to relax.

With the intention of unwinding, we arranged a vacation to the city where a classic romance movie was set.

It was Valentine's Day, and romantic decorations could be seen all around the small town. The hotel also sent flowers and local red wine.

After a day of strolling around the old streets, I pulled Lucien to sit on the balcony sofa and enjoy the scenery at night.

The smell of red wine diffuses in the night. Lucien picked up the decanter and swirled it, then poured the wine into the glass.

I took a few sips, and the mellow aroma of the wine spread in my mouth.

I comfortably exhaled, and my tense nerves became relaxed. I saw a book of Spanish poetry on the corner of the table and opened it casually.

After stumbling over a few lines, an unfamiliar phrase caught my attention.

MC: distancia íntima…

I didn't know why I repeated it, and I saw Lucien on the sofa, gazing down at the color of the red wine.

So I gently leaned my head, rested my chin on his shoulder, and dragged the tail notes.

MC: Professor Lucien, I don't quite understand this part.

Lucien put down his glass and glanced over the line of poetry that I pointed to. Then, his gaze fell on my face.

Lucien: It refers to an interpersonal distance of 46 cm, which is also the minimum distance for self-defense.

Lucien: Typically, it is reserved exclusively for family members… or lovers.

Lucien's fingertips fell to my lips, gently wiping away the faint red wine stains. I asked him a follow-up question.

MC: What will happen if we overcome this distance?

Lucien: Then both parties will unconsciously want to share… love.

As Lucien spoke, his face approached mine a little closer. I could almost smell the faint scent of alcohol on his breath.

There seem to be unspoken and heavy emotions between our eyes. I put down the glass, smiling, and hooked Lucien's neck.

MC: What is it?

Lucien bowed his head along with my force. His falling bangs brushed my face.

Lucien: I find that there seems to be something else more worth focusing on… I can't wait for this 'lecture' to be over.

MC: Pfft, why are you getting more and more straightforward?

Lucien: [chuckle] I prefer to describe it as something "uncontrollable" rather than straightforward.

Lucien: I've heard that when your heart feels excited, your words or actions will unconsciously show it.

Lucien: (whisper) Just like right now, when I think that MC is very cute…

A drunken kiss fell on my lips along with his words.

The unfinished poetry book fell to the ground with a thud, but no one bothered to pick it up. I clutched the corner of Lucien's coat and instinctively responded to his kiss.

The moonlight is gentle. Between our intertwined breaths, I heard a vague whisper on my lips.

Lucien: (whispering between the kisses-) ...I love you...

My heart suddenly beat a little faster. I pulled away from Lucien, slightly panting. I want to hear more clearly.

MC: Y-you just said…

My words were interrupted by his lips that were chasing mine. I don't know if it is because of alcohol, but Lucien is a little more irresistible than usual.

As the kiss deepened, I gradually lost my focus. I can only close my eyes and cater to his demands.

But that whispered phrase lightly tickled my heart, with little tickles appearing now and then.

[Flashback ends]

[Part 2]

Lucien: MC?

Lucien's voice came to my ears. I looked back and saw Lucien looking at me with interest.

Lucien: Your ears are red... Did you think of something?

MC: (blushing) ...No, it's probably because the coffee is too hot.

I pretended to blow on the coffee in my cup and spoke in a casual manner.

MC: Speaking of which, do you remember what you said to me on the balcony last night?

Lucien tilted his head and seemed to think seriously for a moment.

Lucien: [chuckle] I can't quite remember.

Lucien: It seems that a lot of things happened and many things were said last night.

Lucien: Which one would MC like to hear? Maybe you can give me a hint?

Lucien's expression reveals a little bit of innocence as if he really can't remember the whisper that brushed through his lips.

I opened my lips, and a jumble of chaotic memories accompanied by hot whispers flashed through my mind.

How does this remind us that at that time we were on-

After a moment of staring at each other, I blushed and changed the subject.

MC: ... N-nothing, let's talk about it later.

(they really did ‘that’ on balcony-)

Lucien didn't ask any more questions, as if he didn't notice anything unusual. But I couldn't help thinking, how can I hear him say those three words again?

My heart skipped a beat when I glanced at the book of poems on the corner of my desk.

When I was flipping through the book last night, I saw that there were quite a few love poems included in the book. Maybe… I can use this to create an opportunity?

Thinking of this, I naturally picked up the poetry book and raised it at Lucien.

MC: I suddenly remembered that I hadn't finished reading this book yet.

MC: How about this… Please teach me to read some poems for the occasion of Valentine's Day, Professor Lucien~

I put a little more emphasis on the word "for the occasion".

Lucien looked at me for a moment, got up like he understood what I meant, and then sat beside me.

As the other side of the sofa sank down, I leaned towards Lucien, watching him take over the poetry book as he carefully selected the titles.

I looked at him expectantly. However, I heard Lucien speak in distress at the next second.

Lucien: There are many masterpieces in this poetry collection. Which one does MC want me to read with you?

...Have I not implied enough?

I was a little stunned, and unconsciously spoke.

MC: It's the kind of confession that says I love you-

I abruptly stopped talking for a moment. My ears flushed a little.

... I'm obviously here to set up the conversation. How come I fell into the trap before Lucien did?

I blinked unconsciously. Lucien rested the poetry collection on his chin and thoughtfully looked at me.

A few moments later, a warm hand fell on my shoulder. Lucien hugged me and brought us closer together.

I could almost smell the faint scent of cedar on him- it was the same scent I had been deeply tainted with from last night.

(heh, 'deeply tainted from last night')

Lucien: There is only one copy of the book, so I will have to ask this classmate to read it with me.

His fingertips stopped at a page of the poetry book as he spoke.

Lucien: Aquite amo (Here I love you)… I think this is the one that you like.

Lucien: Andan días iguales persiguiéndose (Days, all one kind, go chasing each other)…

His low reading voice came like a soft evening breeze passing through the twilight-shrouded pine forest.

I held my breath and subconsciously turned my head to look at Lucien. I belatedly discovered that we were already so close.

His side profile is just a short distance away, as if I can drop a kiss on his jaw by just tilting my head.

Noticing my gaze, Lucien raised his eyes to look at me. His voice filled with a couple of imperceptible laughter.

Lucien: [chuckle] Fellow student, please pay attention.

MC: (blush)...I'm paying attention!

I blushed and looked at the page, but I didn't know where I should focus on.

There was a gentle, meaningful laugh ringing in my ears. Lucien raised his hand and held my fingers.

I felt the soft touch of the paper through my fingertips. He guided me across the paper and landed on one line.

Lucien: I have already read this far.

Lucien: Aquí te amo y en vano te oculta el horizonte.

Lucien: Here I love you and the horizon hides you in vain…

The long-awaited words just suddenly came to my ears. My heart beat a little faster, and I instinctively responded to his voice.

MC: Te estoy amando aun entra estas frías cosas (I love you still among these cold things)...

The room echoed with our overlapping voices as we read it to each other. But my eyes gradually began to wander.

I snuck a glance at Lucien, and leaned closer to him. The idea of being "greedy" probes a little bit.

It seems that I want so much more than that.

It would be nice to hear him speak his love... in a straightforward way.

[Part 3]

I pursed my lips in distress.

I know that Lucien won't refuse if I ask him. But a direct request is not as romantic as being unable to restrain your emotions.

But under what circumstances would Lucien say love?

The sound of reading stopped at some point. I belatedly raised my head and met Lucien's gaze.

Lucien: I finished reading the poem that MC wanted to hear. Should I continue?

MC: No~ I want to arrange some other activities.

MC: When traveling, we can't stay just stay in the hotel.

Besides, it is easier to create opportunities in a new environment!

I planned to get up from Lucien's arms, but he caught me by the waist, and I fell back into the embrace behind me.

Lucien's chin gently rested against my shoulder, mimicking my affectionate actions from last night.

Lucien: I have an alternative plan. Would you like to hear it?

Lucien: When I checked in yesterday, the front desk recommended the nearby home gallery and said it would be a good place to visit.

MC: A home gallery?

Lucien: Um, it was converted from a personal residence. The gallery owner changes the theme from time to time and selects paintings for display.

Lucien: The works on display are not those of famous artists. But the personal touch is stronger, and the atmosphere is quiet. The theme in recent days happens to be "lovers".

That sounds like… a good place for creating an opportunity.

I hugged Lucien's arm and nodded with joy.

MC: Well, let's go check it out~

The gallery mentioned by the receptionist wasn't too far from the hotel. Lucien and I strolled along the street, sometimes pausing to look at the roadside scenery.

After about ten minutes, I saw a building with a "Galeria" sign. Curious, I went ahead and pushed the door open.

The room was full of paintings. The elderly owner got up from behind the board and said some words to us with a smile.

Lucien nodded his head in response; I tugged on his sleeve curiously.

Before I said anything, he explained in a low voice.

Lucien: He said that the art exhibition is open, and painting tools are provided to create your own paintings.

Lucien: If you don't mind the surroundings, you can do it in the living room. Or if you don't want to be disturbed, you can also reserve a room. You can decide after the exhibition.

The old man gestured kindly towards the deep corridor in response to his words. Then he sat back at his drawing board and continued to paint.

Not wanting to disturb the old man's work anymore, Lucien and I glanced at each other and lightened our steps in unison.

The daylight flows quietly on the varnished floor, and various portrait paintings hang on the dark vine-patterned walls.

The brush strokes are either smooth or rough, but the faces drawn out are filled with love. I leaned close to the painting frame and carefully examined it.

MC: It seems that not all the portraits here are made by professional artists.

Lucien: Indeed, it is more like a portrait of a lover painted by a visitor on a whim.

I can't help but think of the scene in the movie where the young artist is at a loss as to what to do with his beloved and smile gently.

MC: It is indeed very appropriate to leave this kind of painting for each other in the "holy land of love"~

Lucien: Then, can MC paint a portrait for me?

I blinked in surprise and suddenly thought of something.

Last night, Lucien said that the intimate distance would make people unconsciously want to share their love.

Maybe this can be used to quietly close the distance and create an atmosphere that makes Lucien open his mouth!

Having made up my mind, I nodded with a smile.

MC: Then I'll invite Professor Lucien to be my model this time~

The door of the room was closed silently.

The silence slowly spread, and I could hear the rustling sound of swaying trees from time to time. Lucien looked around and saw the narrow prop bed in the corner.

Lucien: As a model, I have to maintain a pose for a long time… MC, do you mind if I slack off in this way?

As Lucien spoke, he walked around the table and chairs, and sat on the side of the prop bed. I coughed and spun the paintbrush twice.

MC: Sure. So, does Professor Lucien have any ideas about the modeling?

Lucien bent his slender eyebrows.

Lucien: I'll leave it up to the artist to decide.

Lucien: I'm willing to work with you on whatever you need.

Our eyes met for a moment. I held my drawing board and went to stand beside Lucien.

MC: Then I would like you to take a more relaxed pose, Professor Lucien.

As I said that, I pushed Lucien's shoulder. He cooperatively fell back on the pillow and looked at me sincerely.

Lucien: Is this enough?

MC: Let's get a little more relaxed.

MC: I want to portray the way you look when you're at ease~

I explained solemnly and leaned down to unbutton his coat.

MC: ...You should also dress in a way that brings out your sensuality, don't be so tense.

MC: Imagine that you're in the bedroom at home.

His coat fell to the bed sheet, making the atmosphere a little quiet and charming. Lucien looked at me and slightly moved his eyes.

Everything is going as expected. I sat down on the chair beside the bed. And I was beginning to plan how to move forward when I heard Lucien speak.

Lucien: Is this enough for you?

Lucien asked as he lifted his hand and unbuttoned his shirt one by one while I watched.

The collar that was buttoned to the top slowly opens up, and the smooth lines outline the firm shapes, which are gradually hidden behind the bottom of the hem. My ears suddenly turned red.

MC: I-I...

Lucien: I just think it will be more in line with the state that MC wants.

Lucien: (whisper seductively) Or do you need me to relax a bit more?

Lucien's fingertips continued to move down; his tail note was slightly lighter. For some reason, I suddenly felt that the air seemed to heat up a bit.

I quickly averted my gaze and subconsciously tightened my grip on the brush.

MC: No need, this will do!

As I said that, I hurriedly sketched out some lines on the board.

Lucien's soft laugh came to my ears. After the rustling of the fabric, the room returned to silence, with only the rustling sound of the brushes stroking over the canvas remaining.

In addition to wanting to create an opportunity to hear Lucien say those three words, I also wanted to give him this painting as a memento of our Valentine's Day trip.

Dark hair, slender eyebrows… I depicted every emotion stroke by stroke, and the familiar outline gradually emerged on the paper.

It's just that every time I look up, I can see Lucien's smiling eyes.

My face was getting hotter and hotter, and I started to avert my eyes.

The artist's red face when facing the model in the movie came to my mind. I hastily withdrew my gaze and huffed in empathy.

…It turns out that the scene was not exaggerated.

Gazing at the person you like for so long, you really can't control your heartbeat.

I tried my best to maintain my composure and finished most of the painting. Then, Lucien's phone suddenly rang.

He helplessly blinked at me. Before he could say anything, I handed over the phone.

MC: Let's take a look. What if it's news from the research institute~

Lucien took the phone, but his body still remained in the same position as before. He just raised his hand a bit and looked at the message.

The screen's glow shines on his face, sharp and gentle, wonderfully distinguishing between light and dark. Lucien glanced at me, smiled softly, and spoke.

Lucien: Can Miss Artist continue like this?

Realizing this opportunity, I put down my drawing board and got up from my chair.

MC: The angle has changed a bit. Let me correct it.

I said and touched Lucien's cheek, and quietly guided him.

MC: But I didn't expect Professor Lucien to be so calm when he posed in front of me in such a "seductive" way~

Lucien cooperated and tilted his head. His soft bangs brushed against my palm.

Lucien: After all, the job of a model is to work with the creative process.

Lucien: And in the eyes of Miss Artist, now I should be no different from a… butterfly

MC: Now the positions are switched.

I smiled, seeing that Lucien also seemed to have lost in the memory, and then he opened his mouth.

Lucien: The artist once hoped to put the butterfly on a glass cover and keep it with him forever. But later, he discovered that even when he let the butterfly go, it flew back to him.

Lucien: It gave him happiness he had never felt or imagined before.

MC: From the butterfly's perspective, it also reaped the happiness that comes from being willing to stop… The artist and the butterfly are meant to complement each other.

MC: Just like now, you are a "butterfly" that complements me.

Lucien silently looked at me for a moment and bent the corners of his lips.

Lucien: That's right. As you said, painting is a two-way street between the artist and the depicted subject.

Lucien: So, now I will also do my best to assist.

Lucien winked as he talked, and his posture became more relaxed.

I went around in circles and didn't hear the expected response. I pursed my lips and took a roundabout approach to lead him.

MC: Professor Lucien is a very cooperative model. He's probably the ideal partner for any artist~

Lucien: Perhaps. But this kind of close observation is a privilege that belongs only to you.

My heart skipped a beat.

MC: ....Will Professor Lucien have a special feeling when facing the artist like that butterfly?

Lucien: I have.

Lucien said and looked at me.

Lucien: Facing you, I seem to have no way to restrain my heartbeat.

Suddenly, his drunken confessions from last night come to mind, intertwined with his whispers at this moment.

Lucien: (whisper) Just like now. By simply looking at you, I can't help but want to…

Lucien paused.

Amid the accelerated heartbeat, he held my hand that was touching his cheek and slowly rubbed it. The already close distance was shortened again, and my wrist was warmed by the heat of his breath.

Bathed in a faint soft light, he stared at me and spoke softly.

Lucien: (continuing his whisper) So, I'm also a little curious.

Lucien: (still whispering) Now that MC is facing me, what are the thoughts in her heart?

[Part 4]

The church bells rang in the distance, and the birds fluttered their wings and flew past the window.

The shadow of the daylight reflected on Lucien's profile, and the air between us seemed to be stained with lingering and deep affection.

I gazed into Lucien's dark eyes and picked up the painting I was about to finish from the chair.

MC: All I want to express is here.

MC: In that movie, the moment the main character saw the painting, they understood the artist's intention…

MC: So, can you feel my emotions by looking at this?

Lucien looked at the painting. His eyes lingered on every spot as if he was facing a priceless work of art, and there seemed to be some emotions surging in his gaze.

Lucien: Mm, every stroke is full of tenderness and… yearning.

Lucien: Did I get it right?

Seeing his serious expression, I opened my lips hesitantly.

I painted each stroke of the painting with love. How can Lucien didn't feel it…?

Or is my drawing skill so clumsy… that I can't even convey my emotions?

I doubted myself and forcibly raised the corners of my mouth.

MC: It's not wrong, but it's not the right answer either. What I'm trying to express is- ah, just forget it.

I sat back in my chair, feeling a little bit defeated, and sighed unnoticeably.

A very soft sigh came from behind me. Accompanied by the rustling of clothes, I was swept into a warm embrace.

Lucien wrapped me from behind and held the paintbrush together with me.

His faint cedar scent surrounds my body. Lucien leaned close to my cheek and spoke in a low voice.

Lucien: Remember what I told you about "intimate distance"?

Lucien: Within 46 cm, you can feel every subtle change in the breathing and temperature of the person in front of you.

Lucien: For me, you are the only person who can enter this distance.

The brush we hold lands on the canvas. Amidst the rubbing sound caused by the friction of the brush and the canvas, the unrefined half of the face gradually becomes clear.

Lucien immediately put down the paintbrush. He didn't let me go and maintained our hugging position. We looked at the drawing board together.

The canvas shows him lying on the edge of the bed with a faint smile on his face.

However, upon closer look, I find that although the brushwork is more refined later on, something seems to be missing in how the painting subject is portrayed.

I opened my lips but heard Lucien speak.

Lucien: You noticed it too, didn't you?

Lucien: Even I can't paint a true portrait of how I look in your eyes.

Lucien: (whisper) Relaxed, disorganized, and also perhaps a little bit of what you call "playing tricks"… Only in front of you, everything about me will be open without reservation.

Lucien: (whisper) This is a side only you can see… And when I put the brush to the canvas, I can't pour more love into it than you do.

I looked at Lucien, a little stumped for words. In addition to the full attention in his eyes, he also showed a little helpless smile.

Is it possible that he has already understood what I want to express?

So why did he keep avoiding the word "love"? It's like he was trying to bait me to say the word….

I suddenly thought of something and broke free from Lucien's embrace with a little effort.

Then I got up and pressed him down on the chair, unsurely asking him a question.

MC: Your reaction to many things seems to be different than usual today.

MC: …Lucien, are you also planning something?

Lucien: Hmm? 'Also'?

Lucien's voice hid a deeper meaning to it. I opened my mouth and finally admitted with a blushing face.

MC: I admit, I have indeed been trying to bait you to say something to me… What about you?

In the gradual acceleration of my heartbeat, I met with Lucien's gaze.

Lucien: Of course, I… have the same purpose as you.

I blinked in astonishment.

MC: For what reason?

Lucien: For what reason…?

Lucien gently repeated my question, and his warm breath close against my skin.

Lucien: At first, I just thought that the way you worked hard was cute, and I wanted to see more of it. But then I became "greedy" too.

Lucien: Rather than fulfilling your wish, I rather see MC's most instinctive desire for me being revealed in the intimate distance that only belongs to us…

Lucien: Together with the most straightforward expression of love.

Lucien: But looking at it now, it ended up backfired. So, in order to make amends, I'm willing to accept any punishment.

Finally, there is an explanation for this man's various "unromanticism" today. I snorted softly and suddenly thought of something.

MC: But speaking of which, did Professor Lucien remember wrongly?

MC: When we were reading the poem, I was "tricked" into saying I love you first.

Lucien spoke with a voice that was filled with inaudible grievances.

Lucien: But those are the words of the poet, not yours.

Lucien: What I want to hear is a straightforward confession from MC.

I was stunned. I couldn't help laughing when thinking about how I precisely thought the same thing as him. My fingers pulled on Lucien's tie, and I moved closer to him.

Our breathing is gradually intertwined. I asked him a question in a soft voice.

MC: So, is the distance between us now less than 46 centimeters?

Lucien gazed at me and suddenly grabbed my waist.

Lucien: (chuckles, then whispers seductively) I think… It can still be a little closer.

The hands on my waist tightened a little. I leaned over to get close to him and spoke in a teasing manner.

MC: Doesn't Professor Lucien want to take the initiative this time?

Lucien looked as if he was allowing himself to be captured, but his eyes weren't wavering.

Lucien: After all, it's punishment time. So, I'm going to hand over all the initiative to you.

Despite saying these words, his hand did not loosen up in the slightest. Instead, he caressed upward, bringing me closer to him.

I couldn't suppress my laughter. I whispered as I bowed my head.

MC: How cunning.

I kissed Lucien as soon as the words fell.

A slightly cool sensation comes through equally soft lips, and my heart trembles with each restless movement.

I sank into the seemingly passive yet irresistible demands of the person in front of me.

The strength of my body was drained away before I knew it. I half-kneeled, half-sat in his embrace, and couldn't resist closing my eyes.

Entangling, deeply penetrating… The tip of his tongue lightly swept my sensitive upper palate. I shuddered and instinctively wanted to struggle.

But I was firmly confined and had nowhere to escape.

…I don't want to stay away either.

Until every breath that reaches deep into my soul gradually becomes fully tainted with his breath.

I could hear the rustling of the curtains brushing against the window and the sound of people walking in the hallway, but I didn't care about it anymore.

My senses, my everything… All melted in this kiss and the depth of his eyes.

Between our melded breaths, I slightly pulled myself away from Lucien and instinctively opened my mouth to speak.

Lucien: (with the most tender and loving whisper between the kisses) I love you.

MC: (whispering at the very same time as Lucien) I love you.

Coincidentally, our unanimous whispers were intertwined in the air. In just an instant, my heart was filled with happiness, flying like a feather in the warm sunlight.

I raised the corners of my lips and stroked Lucien's cheek.

MC: Is Professor Lucien satisfied with my expression?

Lucien clasped my hand and interlocked our fingers together.

Lucien: (whisper) It's even better than I imagined.

Lucien: (whisper) Everything about you, every time you approach me... makes my heart beat excitedly.

His warm breath brushed against my ear. Lucien tilted his head again and irresistibly chased after my lips.

The spring scenery is deeply reflected in his eyes, and I also saw my figure reflected in them.

After those whispers, I heard him whisper once again.

Lucien: It makes me fall in love with you again and again... for countless times.

[Personal Rambles + Date analysis(?) corner]

I love this date. Personally, I would even say that I like this date better than last month’s SP and SSR. I think it is worth being the one date where it has ‘I love you’ in it. Not just ‘I like you’, or his ‘definition of love’.

There are many things I want to scream about this date- but to keep it simple, I’ll just talk about some parts that I think are really interesting this date.

[Here I love you]

Okay, so the first one is the poem, ‘Here I love you’ by Pablo Neruda. I like this part because their poem exchange reminds me of the scene from Lucien’s Blossoms date where they wittily quoted poems to each other (something that sadly, gets lost in translation:”).

But anyway, back to the topic of my interpretation of how some lines of this poem coincided with parts of the dates and their story in general.

First of all, I love how PG choose this poem that explores love and fear of losing someone you love, which is THE big angst theme for Lucien.

"In that hazy memory, he seems to have lost someone."

—In his dream, he also sat with a girl under a tall tree, painting. He never understood why but when they drew a seedling on the paper, he would draw a glass to cover it.

Until just now, after he experienced the moment of losing the only color in his life, Lucien understood his choice in the dream.

—This is a fear of losing someone again.' - [R&S Eternity and a day.]

There’s a reason why PG chooses to torture this man by making him believe that MC is dead after chapter 18 [R&S Not Planned On] and making him watch her die again and again in [Main Story S2 chapters 13 and 14]. Because he already lost so much in life, he’s probably the one who fear losing MC the most.

Here I love you. The word here indicates that the poet is the one who stays and waits in one place. Just like Lucien, who is always waiting for her to take him home in S2. He doesn’t mind waiting for her answer no matter how long. It’s also something that’s highlighted in [Dating Reality Show Date]. Where we learn that he was the one who fell at first sight and waited for MC whose love is something that grows with time and his companionship.

This is a port. Here I love you. Just like ships that always come and go in the port, so do people. But ships can always come back to port after they parted. The butterfly can always fly back to the artist even after the artist lets her go. I’ll dive deeper into it in its own section ;)

I love what I do not have. It really reminds me of what MC said in the only color call. Where she said that to love someone is to love them as an individual, and there’s no requirement for a special relationship. You just want the person you love to be happy, not to ‘have’ them :”.

The moon turns its clockwork dream; The biggest stars look at me with your eyes. Lucien will unconsciously reveal his sides that he doesn’t even notice. Only in front of her, he will open up everything about himself without reservation. ‘The biggest star’ is the love in her eyes as she gazes at him as if he’s the only person she can see in this world.

“You noticed it too, didn't you?”

“Even I can't paint a true portrait of how I look in your eyes.”

And the opposite also true, because he too, always gazes at her as if she’s the only person he can see in this world.

The spring scenery is deeply reflected in his eyes, and I also saw my figure reflected in them.

[Distancia Intima]

This one is probably the shortest part ahah, but distancia intima or Intimate Distance is the nearest space around our body and is reserved for an intimate person like a family member or lover.

For Lucien, it’s a space that only belongs to one person. Only in front of her, he can show his most unreserved sides.

But on the other side, it also means that she’s the only important person left in his life. Whether as his ‘family member’ or lover :”...

[Reverse Artist and Butterfly]

OK BUT, this one is definitely an unexpected twist, but pleasant. I love how in the process of confessing ‘I love you’ we get taken back to his very first definition of love, the Artist and Butterfly.

“If you can meet that artist, tell him this for me. That he actually doesn’t love the butterfly, does he?”

“Why do you think that the artist doesn’t love the butterfly? If you love someone, aren’t you supposed to move heaven and earth to tie them to your side?”

“But that is too selfish.”

“Yes, even I find it selfish.”

“But if he doesn’t do that, it’s likely that the artist will lose the butterfly.”

“And then his life will be like how it was before, his whole world would just be black and white.”

“If he really loves the butterfly, then he wouldn’t want to see them suffer, right?”

“Maybe I’m too simple, but for me, genuine love is simply loving that person as an individual, and I wouldn’t need a special relationship with them. I’d just want them to be happy.”

“If you were this butterfly, and there was someone who wanted to confine you to their side so they could keep you together with them forever…”

“Would you be willing?” - [The Only Color Call]

For him at first, to love is to bind someone by his side, but for MC to love is simply loving the person as an individual and wanting them to be happy. It reminds me of the saying ‘If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.’

The artist let the butterfly go, but the butterfly flew back and decided to stay with the artist because it is happy to be by the artist’s side. This happiness is a two-way street because the butterfly’s willingness to stop also brings the artist happiness he never felt before… Their choice of being by each other side is the longest confession of love.

It is even more interesting that this date talks about the identity exchange between the artist and the butterfly. All this time, we usually thought that Lucien is the ‘artist’ while MC is the ‘butterfly’ but it seems that, the reverse also works.

Because Lucien also brings color to MC just like the butterfly to the artist. They color each other’s world.

Perhaps for everyone, the world was monochromatic at the beginning.

With time and encounters, the world gradually became stained with colors, giving value to different people and things.

Slowly, the whole world becomes colorful as it interacts with memory. It also has smells and sounds.

Until the most special existence appeared that makes the color of this world more distinctive.

It's as if the whole picture has been retouched so that everything has a new meaning.

While we quietly shared the cake, I looked at Lucien's face lit by the warm lights.

“Lucien, you’re colorful right now” – Lucien’s 3rd birthday date

-and because MC too, just like the artist, also greedily wants to keep him safe forever. But because she knew that she couldn’t stop Lucien from walking towards his aspiration, all she can do is let him go and try to catch up to him.

Both of them learn to let go as the artist and also choose to stay as the butterfly because it’s what makes them happy.

[我爱你]

From ‘Can you teach me how to love?’ to ‘I love you.’ LOOK AT HOW FAR HE’S GROWN. I can’t believe it’s been days since the date and the PV but I still sob every time I heard him say that. It’s been a long process, even though he’s been declaring his love in his own way, whether it is his wordless declaration of love in S1 chapters 35 and 36. Or the wheat field as the representation of his heart, with the ebbs and flow of the tide as his heartbeat in S2 chapter 34.

I love you is special as the most straightforward way to declare one’s love. I love how on this date these two fools tried to trap each other into confessing but ended up confessing instinctively at the very same time lmao. The situation is really funny, with MC who’s trying her best to create an atmosphere where Lucien would say I love you vs Lucien that knows all along about her plan, even manages to trap MC into confessing first but ends up feeling dissatisfied with the confession because it’s the poet words, not hers (-how childish-).

On this date, both of them ended up becoming greedy, wanting to hear the most direct love confession from each other.

I snuck a glance at Lucien, and leaned closer to him. The idea of being “greedy" probes a little bit.

It seems that I want so much more than that.

It would be nice to hear him speak his love... in a straightforward way.

“At first, I just thought that the way you worked hard was cute, and wanted to see more of it. But then I became “greedy” too.”

“Rather than fulfilling your wish, I rather see MC's most instinctive desire for me being revealed in the intimate distance that only belongs to us…”

“Together with the most straightforward expression of love.”

“What I want to hear is a straightforward confession from MC.”

-although both of their plans also end up backfiring as neither of them gets the straightforward love confession from their plans, MC was unhappy, and Lucien ended up taking the initiative to open up the first because he can’t stand seeing her in distress.

“It's not wrong, but it's not the right answer either. What I’m trying to express is- ah, just forget it.”

I sat back in my chair, feeling a little bit defeated, and sighed unnoticeably.

A very soft sigh came from behind me. Accompanied by the rustling of clothes, I was swept into a warm embrace.

It’s interesting sometimes how they sometimes mirror each other, having the same expectation and desires, while also opposing each other on the other occasion, like their belief and the way they see things. But one thing always remains the same, and it’s the fact that they’ll always yearn for each other.

In the end, they learn that they don’t need to go that far. They just need to follow their heart. Because whether when sober or drunk, the heart knows when to beat faster simply by the presence of each other. The most perfect explanation of this mutual eternal heartbeat is ‘I love you’. And he will keep falling in love, again and again, countless times simply by her close proximity or existence alone.

My final words; I’m very, very satisfied with this date~

#HOW CAN SOMETHING BE SWEET SPICY AND ANGSTY AT THE SAME TIME #enjoy the 1.5k date analysis (?)#this one is my personal favourite sobs #mlqc lucien #mr love queen's choice #mlqc date #mlqc cn #mlqc spoiler #mr. love queen's choice #mlqc

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mod2amaryllis · 1 year

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just gonna sliiide into your inbox to be like. got any complicated relationship with motherhood recs?? cause I'm👀

👁️👁️ b i s c i a.

the first rec is always for all time The Broken Earth trilogy by NK Jemisin

talk about books that changed my brain chemistry and boosted my writing, especially the fifth season, which pulls a narrative trick with its 3 main character perspectives that still has me reeling and makes me resent the fact that not every protagonist is an exhausted middle aged mother who's haunted by choices and horrors of her own making!!

The Devourers by Indra Das

a take on werewolves that's at times genuinely sickening to read, esp for my body-horror-scawy ass. lot of upsetting themes fyi, like. all the themes. are upsetting. but i was left feeling like I'd just gotten the world's most dire hug. also trans allegory out the wazoo.

i feel like this one is really obligatory like yeah no shit Beloved by Toni Morrison but still: Beloved by Toni Morrison

I've never felt smart enough for this book but i think about it constantly, not just because the contents are so traumatic but the way it's written..... even now i feel like such a dunce trying to say anything about it but it's like. it broke rules in my brain about how books are supposed to be structured and understood. there's a chapter that ends in a stream of thought that's borderline incomprehensible and it's in my head forever.

ok little different now and largely positive mushy gushy mom stuff, but a lot of Brandi Carlile's songs, especially The Mother:

and her whole In These Silent Days album. particularly it's celebrating lesbian motherhood. Mama Werewolf is awesome and introduces that complication that makes me ravenous, but my favorite is her love song to her wife, You And Me On The Rock

there's a song exploder podcast episode about it. she talks about how it's an homage to her good friend Joni Mitchell, how it's about this very feminine love she shares with her wife and daughter (and now also her son) and how she spent some of her youth grappling with that femininity.

speaking of song exploder!!!!!! the episode for Song For Our Daughter by Laura Marling

Laura Marling and her partner don't have children. this song is a hypothetical about the trauma of being a girl and having your boundaries crossed when you're young. but what absolutely destroys me is that there's a string section, which was written by a violinist to whom she gave creative liberty, and in his strings he says, "i wrote this to be the character of The Daughter, so she's here in the song soaring over everything" and it just. hearing the context and then listening to the song........i show this episode to anyone who's stuck in a car with me 25 minutes.

on the subject of music, of course there's Florence + The Machine's 2022 album Dance Fever, particularly King

youtube

like hell yeah let's get primal with it

and ok this is gonna clock my grew up as a theatre kid ass but still, to this day, Next To Normal.

listening to this show as a teenager who was just starting to hate my (wonderful awesome love her) mom was like......hoooooo. it blew open the my-parents-are-human empathy. idc about like whether or not this musical lives up to the insane hype it got in the late 2000s it just meant a lot to me personally.

also there's movies i guess! but if you're not already on the Everything Everywhere All At Once train idk what we're doing

then my oldest mom-centric media of all, so old that I'm not even sure how well it holds up to my current person sensibilities, Fruits Basket

the way her death is the inciting incident for everything that happens after, and how she's a ghost that haunts the rest of the story, at times a protective spirit and at other times a traumatic poltergeist, is like. i thought i was a 13yo reading a magical high school romance what's happening to me.

then of course the current rec, Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood

Lockwood is a poet and this is her memoir about growing up with a Catholic priest for a dad, something that in itself seems contradictory. it's phenomenal. i can't believe someone exists who's this good at writing. her relationship with her mother is hilariously, tenderly depicted and it's questioning and resentful and loving and there's a chapter about them called the cum queens of the hyatt palace and it's the funniest thing I've ever read

oops too many words

motherhood in media borders on fixation for me lol i don't always seek it out but when it's there I'm like AAAAAAAAH, AAAAAAAH AAAAAAAAAAAAH AAAAAH IS ANYONE ELSE SEEING THIS GRAAAAAHHHH!!!!

........oh and undertale. how could i forget Undertale.

#m2a #m2answers #not tagging all this shit lol yeah right!!!!!#i get into parent stuff in my writing every chance i freaking get #stream joat ch114 The Mother like comment subscribe for more toriel content

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ashes-writing · 2 years

Text

wild one | stranger things ; g.emerson

tag list babes || rules + fandoms/characters || got a ? or req? || masterlist

CHAPTERS ;

AUTHORS NOTES;

Smh at myself. We're not ignoring my ten thousand other wips but.. This idea, to write a popular cheerleader reader who isn't necessarily the 'traditional' cheerleader stereotype, y'all.. I needed it like I need air to breathe. Then the cute but awkward lil backstory you're about to read scattered throughout the first chapter filled itself in and yeah.. here we fuckin goooo. All I can say about this one is I had a blast writing out this part. It was good for shits and giggles but this is literally all I got for this idea of mine, so like.. lmk if you guys want to see more. Reader is the new stepsister of Max Mayfield, btw, whether I go with this being the "upside down being real / bringing back dead characters / etc" I've been dying to do or not. I thought it'd be cute to do something where reader is connected to Max.

Huuugest of hugs and love to all of you for a) putting up with my fuckery and reading - esp the likes, comments, reblogs with and without hashtags. You guys really do not know how much motivation that some of you have been with me posting again and I can never thank you enough, tbh. I love you all sm.

Okay, so two things here... One, Spot the 80's movie easter egg, bc I'm curious who will pick up on it, lol. Two, should I have the upside down / vecna and all of that happen here or no, you guys would rather read more slice of life stuff? Because honestly, I'm torn on that.

SUMMARY;

-- cheerleaders and drummers, especially ones with awkward histories and mutual crushes, they don't mix... do they?

aka, you are one of the popular kids, a cheerleader. but you're not a carbon copy of the rest. you've managed to catch the eye of a certain drummer. what's going to happen next?

PAIRING;

Gareth Emerson x Popular!Cheerleader Fem reader.

{ aside from having female parts + outfit descriptions, there is no physical description given of reader so knock yourselves out here.}

WARNINGS;

underage drinking, body issues briefly mentioned, swearing, assorted teenage fuckery (skipping, possibly fights, sneaking out of the house and sneaking into bars), vomit is briefly mentioned in this chapter, jason carver existing, who knows what else.

TAGLIST;

The only people on my taglist for Stranger Things currently are listed below. If you’d like to be and you aren’t, please go add yourself via the link at the very top of the post.

@ALLELITESMUT

@AURUMBELIS

@ARIES-ARCADE

@COLE22ANN

@HCLOANGCLS

@HEYAITSKLAUDIA

@ICEQUEEN1371

@KRYS-ORION

@LETSBEDRAGONSTOGETHER

@MUSICHEALSSCARS

@SCOOBIESSNACKS

@SUITS-AND-SMIRKS

OTHER STUFF;

Set in the summer leading up to S4. Max Mayfield has a stepsister so this implies that Neil and her mom split and depending on whether I do this as another slice of life story or not (i haven't decided just yet) Billy may or may not crop up / become a part of this either way. Just so we're all clear, Gareth -and Jeff because he can't graduate without bestie, can he?, have been aged up to 18. Everyone is of legal age for any potential shenanigans that may occur within.

“Okay, I’ve got one.” your best friend Emma glances up, green eyes darting around the pool before fixing her gaze on you. The smirk on her face doesn’t go missed. “Gareth Emerson... On a scale of 1 to 10, how fuckable?”

You rub your forehead, wiping away the blazing hot sun overhead. “We’re cheer zombies now, Em. You know that’s frowned upon… Sides,” you sigh, “Remember when I did try to go for it? Remember what happened? Because I sure as shit haven’t forgotten. Kind of why I avoid him at all costs now, remember?” and you go quiet for a few seconds before answering quietly, "10. He is absolutely a ten. I mean..." you gesture to where he stands in the water, playing with his sisters, "Look at how fucking sweet he is, he's so gentle with them. And he's hot, there's that.."

“Oh come on… all you did was throw up on the guy.” Emma shrugs mildly, glancing in the direction of Gareth Emerson, known freak and drummer for the band Corroded Coffin. The boy you had a crush on in seventh grade. The boy she still catches you staring at now and then. She loves to tease you about your little moment of panic, but honestly, she just thinks you’d look so damn cute together. She laughs when you give the answer she figured you'd say and she nods. "Okay, so you'd fuck him."

“Em, we were practically glued to each other in the closet that night til I went and did that then bolted... I’d think it kinda scarred us both?” you cringe as you say it and you shake your head. “I still want to die, okay? I just.. I got nervous, I’d never kissed a boy and then the bottle lands on him and you know how much I liked him then. “ you laugh and shake your head at yourself. Feels like a lifetime ago. When she asks if you'd fuck him, you bite your lip and glance his way again, staring just a little too long. Distracted. Taking him in. And finally, you answer. "He could definitely fuck me." as you fan yourself and tear your eyes off of Gareth Emerson to glance over at your best friend.

“Speaking of scarring… Here comes Carver. Pretend to be happy to worship the idiot king. We can’t have the rest of the girls figuring out we haven’t been swapped out for a pod person yet. I mean it.. On your best behavior, woman!” Emma nods in the direction of Jason Carver and his two best friends, Andy and Patrick and she laughs, because she knows that best behavior is an impossible task for you, especially when it comes to Jason and his friends or any of the other girls on your cheerleading squad.

You smirk. “I make no promises, Em.” you mouth as Jason spots you both lounging and makes a beeline for the side of the pool you happen to be sitting in lounge chairs on.

“Hey girls.” Jason plops himself down between your chairs, drawing his knees up and draping muscular arms around them. You roll your eyes and say nothing.

Emma does the same. If Patrick had wandered over, she’d have been all over it. But there’s something that you both agree is inherently creepy about Jason Carver.

“How’s summer so far? Excited to get back and cheer our team to victory, huh?” Jason tries again, a hint of annoyance edging into his tone because you’re both ignoring him and he does not like being ignored.

You pull yourself to a sitting position and nod to the blood red towel with the white Playboy logo that he’s currently parked his ass on top of. “You’re sitting on my towel, my cigarettes and my tanning oil, idiot.”

“Sorry.” Jason’s all plastic grins as he gazes at you and there’s this lewd gleam in his eyes that makes you want to vomit all over him -or alternately, claw out his eyes with your press on nails. “Y’know… you could really do with more lotion, sweetheart.” he suggests, reaching for the bottle of sunscreen near him. “You’re starting to burn.”

“Ah ah!” you’re loud when you say it while shrinking back as Jason moves just a little closer to your chair, “Did I give you permission to come closer, Carver? We’ve had the discussion about boundaries how many times now?”

Jason rolls his eyes. “Y’know, I have friends on your team and all it’ll take is one word from me.. Maybe you two should do a better job fitting in, hm? Just something t’ think about. Have a good afternoon, ladies.” and he pulls himself up off the hot concrete, walking away.

“Did he seriously just hint he’d get us thrown off the team? For not kissing his ass like the other girls?” Emma’s gaping, glaring at his retreating back. You smirk and shrug. “Fuck ‘em. I mean this is senior year, Em. Do we really need to be cheer zombies yet again?”

“One, that outfit makes me look fucking hot and it’s a one way ticket to all the cock I can handle... Two, if we abandon ship now, we’re only showing them they really are better than us which we both know is not true and three, hello? The parties we won’t get invited to?” Emma’s little speech has you side-eyeing her. You snort in laughter and you shrug it off, but the idea takes hold for a second time since summer starting and as you lie there, marinading in the strongest suntan oil the local tanning bed sells, you find yourself wondering all over again… what if you did say fuck being popular? Because honestly, you don’t really care either way. School is just school. You’re not subscribing to the whole “ it will matter how popular you were” crap because you don’t really give a damn as long as you have fun. Live your life.

The only reason you even made the damn squad to begin with is because you knew the stunts, you’re loud and you happen to be really flexible for some reason. If not for those three things, you have absolutely no doubt in your mind, you would’ve never made the cut.

And across the pool, the laughter of Gareth Emerson’s two little sisters rings out, causing you to glance up and in that direction over the rim of your sunglasses, a soft smile playing at your lips as you watch him let his sisters use his body as a jungle gym and laugh about it.

“Wish that was you right about now, hm?” Emma taunts quietly, flashing a smirk at you.

You flip Emma off wordlessly and pull yourself up off the lounge chair, holding out a hand to her. She tosses you the baggy black Billy Idol shirt you were wearing over your favorite little red swimsuit and you pull on your favorite cut offs. “The ice cream truck is out in the parking lot, c’mon let’s goooooo.” you’re practically bouncing and grinning and Emma laughs, nodding. “I could go for a blue bomb.”

“Last one to the truck has to be DD tonight when we’re out and about.” you call out to her as you cheat and start to rush towards the chain link fence after pulling on your favorite pair of red pull on boots -that you totally didn’t become inspired to buy after being suckered into seeing the lead girl in a movie sometime around tenth grade but have since become a huge part of your wardrobe and your new ‘persona’.

Just as you’re out in the parking lot, your new step sister rushes up behind you, her skateboard skidding to a stop as she kicks it up and tucks it beneath her arm.

“You’re getting ice cream too?” Max Mayfield asks, nodding towards the stopped ice cream truck.

“Mhm. You want anything, little red?” you ask, giving her boyfriend Lucas a warm smile and grinning at Lucas’ little sister Erica. “What about you two?” you nod to the Sinclairs.

“I’m good, thanks though.” Lucas politely declines because they’re sold out of his usual. Erica starts to speak up but Lucas gives her a warning look. You laugh. “You want some of those little dots?” and the 11 year old nods, sticking her tongue out at Lucas, “She likes me.” Erica asserts. Max laughs and nods to a new addition to the board tacked to the truck. “They’ve got snow cones now.”

“Oooh. Do you want tiger blood?” you ask, tapping your chin thoughtfully. “I’m either gettin that or bubblegum.”

Max grins and nods. It’s not a real grin, you haven’t seen one of those out of her as long as you’ve known her, but.. It is a grin. “Bubblegum, I think.” Max answers and you give her a thumbs up. “Bubblegum.” she confirms a second later after thinking it over. You laugh and nod. “I’m gonna get tiger blood.” you answer, nudging her.

You happen to glance back just in time to see Gareth emerge through the gates, one sister holding his hand and the other snuggled up to him as he carries her across the lot on his hip. Lucas waves him over and you’re quick to face the front. “Shit, fuck, shit.” you mumble.

Max snickers quietly. “It’s just Gareth. He lives down the street from Lucas. They played DnD together earlier this summer, I think.” she shrugs, gazing up at you with your flushed face and her brow raised at it.

“Yeah, well Gareth also happens to be the guy I threw up all over, Max.” you cringe as you say it and she gapes, blue eyes widening almost comically. “Wait… Him? He’s the one you were telling me about that night I had the nightmare and came into your room?”

“Him.” you drawl out the word. “I uh… kind of avoid him as much as possible now. I mean, I threw up all over him and blew what could’ve been my dream first kiss back then, fucks sake…”

“Because she’s somehow both a daredevil and a little chicken shit.” Emma taunts as she turns around and smirks.

You can feel someone staring but knowing that Gareth is literally right behind you in the line almost and that with your lousy luck it’s probably just Jason Carver, the creepy asshole you and Emma just can’t seem to get rid of despite him having a glrl already, you do not dare turn around. Nope, not happening.

You let out a ragged breath when it’s finally time for you to order. You rattle off your order as Lucas and Gareth continue to talk quietly amongst themselves.

When your snow cones are ready, you take yours and hold the one you got Max out to her. Then you hand the little bowl of dots and a spoon out to Erica.

“You know her, Sinclair?” Gareth nods to you and swallows hard as his eyes roam your body. He finally manages to tear his eyes off and he gazes at the lanky teen boy from down the street.

“Yeah! She babysits my youngest sister sometimes, man. She’s Max’s new stepsister too.” Lucas shrugs and laughs.

“Wait.. so she’s the one you had to help in the house because she was literally off her tits drunk and started an argument with the front door?” Gareth snickers quietly. Lucas laughs and glances at you, “Mhm. She’s kind of a handful, man.”

And he wonders to himself when this happened because you used to be quiet and sweet. Real shy. He ultimately shrugs it off though, because you’re one of the popular kids now and about the only time any of you speak to him or any of his friends is if your friends are bullying his friends. And you haven’t even looked at him since back in middle school, the night of some classmate’s birthday party.

But he does notice you. He never stopped, really. And he does enjoy pep rally days, watching you roam the halls of Hawkins High in that little green and orange uniform with those loud red boots you started wearing back in tenth grade and you now wear with practically everything. And the one time you and your friend Emma wore ripped fishnets beneath the uniform for a Halloween pep rally, ugh… He couldn’t take his eyes off you for the rest of the day and his focus was completely fucked and that carried over into a practice session in his garage for the band that night.

It’s been haunting his mind for a while now, he was thisclose to having you as his first kiss back then. It would have been peak for him because honestly, he’s had a huge crush on you for years. He just never went for it -and still doesn't, because he didn’t think he had a chance. And then, the night you were sent into a dingy basement closet during your first ever game of seven in heaven and you threw up on him and bolted, he kind of got the message loud and clear. The thought of kissing him was enough to make you literally lose your lunch. So he keeps a wide berth.

He spots Jason Carver approaching and his entire body tenses up. He swears under his breath and pulls the sister standing at his side as close as he can get her to him.

Jason makes his way over to you and taps your shoulder and you whirl around, a hand on your hip and an annoyed look clearly written on your face.

You scowl up at Jason and laugh while shaking your head. When he steps a little closer, you gently shove him back. “There you go again, Carver. Am I gonna have t’ knock you stupid, buddy?” you say it in the friendliest tone, you’re even smiling as you say it, a scolding hint edging into your voice as you continue to drawl, “ I told you, stop gettin so close, idiot. Do I need to say it slower or somethin?” you say it cheerfully, you’re even giggling as the words leave your mouth and when he gives you a bit of an angry look, you roll your eyes.

“Andy wants t’ know if you’re coming out to the carnival later.” Jason backs up, but he’s visibly irritated at being told off by you yet again. It’s something he clearly should be used to by now but he hates the word no. Or any variation. As he stares down at you intently and scowls at the blood red face of Billy Idol printed on the front of your shirt, he waits on an answer.

“Probably after I play a few rounds of darts at the Hideout. If I feel like it, that is.” you shrug, gazing over at Jason’s pet idiot as he leans on the gate, giving him a sarcastic wave. “Why?”

“He really likes you. I mean he really, really likes you.” Jason is saying it in this coaxing way, it’s almost as if he’s trying to charm you into going along with what he wants you to do. You double over howling in laughter, even snorting a little. “No. Nope. No thanks, I’m all good.”

“Oh come on! I already said I’d go with Patrick.” Emma pleads. You laugh. “Yeah, but see, you like Patrick. I can’t stand Andy, I don’t do things I don’t wanna.” you smirk when Jason’s fist clenches at his side. “And no amount of threat is gonna make me either, Carver. Take a hike.”

“Ya know, he’s going to State next year on a full athletic scholarship.. Right? Being his girl would be huge for anybody, especially you. You’re the only girl on the squad left single and with the reputation you already have, sweetheart… They talk, ya know. Chrissy tells me everything because it bothers her when they say things about you. She thinks you're a nice girl, y'know... I’m just trying to help you fit in.” Jason says it so mild and calm, with the sweetest grin.

“Oh my gosh, do I fall at your feet now? You’re trying to help poor widdle, defenseless me, aw…” you laugh quietly and give him the same mild and calm look he’s giving you as you drag a hand through your hair. “Do I look like I want your help?”

“Okay, fine. Just trying to be a good friend. Y’know, you’re a real bitch, sweetheart.” Jason starts to walk off and you laugh and call out after him, “Thank you, Carver. I’ll take that as flattery.”

Gareth has just stood there, watching the whole thing unfold.

Lucas snickers quietly as he gapes at your now turned back. “She’s only on cheer in the first place because she’s pretty much a human bendy straw. That’s what Max told me, anyway.”

Gareth nods. “Yeah.” he remembers watching you put a leg behind your head in the back of the classroom in fourth or fifth grade because one of the girls you were friends with dared you to do it and he chuckles quietly, shaking his head, making soft curls bounce just a little.

He lets go of his little sister’s hand for just one second to scratch his nose and she’s tugging on the bottom of your cutoffs and he wants to simply vanish in that moment. He tenses up and he’s watching the situation intently, frozen because while he knows he needs to grab her so she doesn’t bother you, his brain and body simply won’t allow it. And deep down, parts of him are just waiting on you to be rude or dismissive or even ignore his little sister outright so that maybe he finally has proof positive that he’s right and you really are one of the popular kids and you were repulsed the night you threw up on him.

You feel a tug to your cut offs.

You turn and glance down to find a little girl standing there with curls similar to the ones on Gareth Emerson’s head. You smile at her and bite your lip. “What’s up, sweetheart?” you bend down to her level so you are eye to eye with the little girl. “Your boots are pretty.” she grins when she says it, tilting her head so that all those pretty little curls fall to one side a bit.

You laugh softly. “You’re a little cutie.” you boop her nose as you tell her and you notice that her sandals are on the wrong feet so you laugh softly and sit down on the pavement, holding your arms up to her. “C’mere, cutie. You’ve got those shoes on all sorts of wrong. I’ll fix it.”

The little girl grins and sits down on your legs and you swap her shoes.

Gareth watches you with his little sister and he grins to himself a little. On the one hand, he’s relieved because you weren’t mean or anything. On the other, this is bad news for him because that stupid little crush that he thought he forgot about forever ago? It’s starting to come back, little by little. Especially after watching you handle Jason Carver the way you did.

Lucas wants to die laughing as he watches the intense internal struggle play out in the facial expression of his neighbor. “You good, Emerson?”

“Yeah. Do you think you could uh…” he nods to where his little sister stands and gives Lucas a pleading look. And after teasing Gareth for a second, he grabs up the little girl, making her laugh as he stands her on her feet beside Gareth again. “It wasn’t that hard, Emerson.” Lucas taunts, smirking at the older boy. “Why are you wearing a shirt at the pool anyway, man? It’s hot as hell out here.”

It’s a question Gareth refuses to answer because the answer is obvious. He doesn’t want to take off his shirt because he’s not comfortable with the pudge he has. He hates it, honestly. It’s one of the things that bothers him most, the chub to his cheeks being right in line behind that. Eddie or Jeff get girls' numbers at shows. Even Grant's hooked up with someone before. When it comes to him, the girls all either ignore him or think he’s just some annoying kid because thanks to his cheeks and the fact that he's not quite as tall as his friends, he looks a lot younger than 18. It used to hurt a lot more than it does now. Now he’s just resigned himself to living with it. But he’s not near comfortable enough in his own skin to shed his shirt at the pool. If not for the heat and his sisters begging him to join in and swim with him this time, he’d probably have worn jeans again too.

You glance in Gareth’s direction and as your cheeks burn hot, you manage a smile and a little wave while slurping your snow cone through a straw. “Your sister’s a little cutie, man.” you’re surprised you got the words out. Gareth fluffs her hair and smiles. “Yeah, don’t let it fool you. She uses it to her advantage.” he laughs as he says it, glancing down at her and then back up at you.

You glance at the little girl and shake your head. “Don’t lie! She’s a little angel, she has to be.”

And as you turn to face the front, you feel just a little better. Relieved, even. You finally managed to say two coherent words to the boy you had such an intense crush on back in seventh grade that you threw up all over him when you finally had a chance to kiss him. You really feel like you’ve conquered something.

Only, you have not the first clue what you’ve just started…

#gareth emerson #gareth the great #gareth emerson imagine #gareth emerson fanfiction #gareth emerson fanfic #gareth emerson x reader #gareth emerson x fem!reader #gareth emerson x reader imagine #gareth emerson x fem!reader imagine

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vvh1sk3y · 1 year

Note

Heyyy!! I have some ideas… maybe how Soap is when it’s about to cuddle or holding hands… Or how he would spend his birthday or S/O birthday. And what would he do when his partner is sick or just feels tired. I just need some fluff to read, cause I can’t really find fics with John 😩 My whole fyp is with Ghost hahah

i feel you! i love ghost but the other characters need love too (esp soap hehe) pretty much this is a dump of soft/fluffy soap headcanons :,)

character(s): john “soap” mactavish, gen!reader

warning(s): mentions of illness/feeling unwell, mentions of sexy times

soap loves cuddling and having his hands on you, no matter what.

if you’re sitting next to each other it’s a sure bet he’ll either have his arm wrapped around you or his hand resting on your thigh, tracing random things with his thumb. (especially when he’s driving)

if you’re in bed together you’ll be spooning- he is the big spoon -or you’ll have your head resting on his chest. he sleeps much better this way. sometimes he’ll cuddle into your side if he’s had a bad day or just feels like it, but he much rather would be holding you.

if you and john are out together, he’ll sometimes hold your hand if you’re walking around outside or in a shopping mall. he wants everyone to know your his :)

speaking of shopping malls… john loves your birthday because it means he can spoil the hell out of you. he always makes a pretty big deal out of it and whatever you want that day he makes sure it happens.

however, john doesn’t like you making a big deal out of his birthday. in his words, “i’m just a year closer to being six feet under” (but if you said the same thing he’d probably yell at you to not be so morbid) to him, having a few drinks and making love to you is his idea of a good birthday.

john babies the hell out of you whenever you’re feeling under the weather or sick. hell, he’ll stay in bed with you all day if he can.

he’ll give you one of his sweatshirts or shirts to wear instead of your own (mostly because he thinks you look hot in his clothes, even when you aren’t feeling great)

he’ll order food for the both of you and go as far as to offer to feed it to you even if you are very obviously capable of doing it yourself. sometimes you let him shove pizza in your face to make him happy.

he’ll “kiss you better” and kiss you all over your face and continuously ask if you feel any better. he does this to try and get a laugh out of you, especially if he knows you’re having a hard day.

you’ll watch the absolute worst movies together. i feel like reboot soap is more up-to-date with memes and whatever movie is deemed shit online and will convince you to watch it with him just for laughs.

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spgothkidsheadcanons · 1 year

Note

AHHHH IM SO HAPPY SOMEONE ELSE REALIZES MICHAEL IS SO MICH LIK JD FROM HEATHERSSS ESP THE MUSICAL VERSION ☝🏻 ALSO YOU WERE MEANT TO BE MINE WOULD DEF FIT YANDERE MICHAEL!! sorry i’m just kinda excited 😓💗

LISTEN I LOVE MICHAEL. HE REMINDS ME OF THIS KID I WENT TO HIGHSCHOOL WITH WHO ALSO REMINDED ME OF JD

Anyways, Meant to be Yours is my absolute favorite song from the musical, so I had so much fun writing this one. I don’t really know how to write yandere, so I did try my hardest, but don’t be disappointed if it’s not yandere enough 🤣

PLEASE READ WARNINGS BEFORE READING THIS STORY

FALSE SEWERSLIDE IS MENTIONED!! I DO NOT WRITE ACTUAL SEWERSLIDE. FOR THE SAKE OF THE FIC ONLY, IT’S PURELY BASED ON THE EVENTS THAT HAPPEN IN THE FILM AND THE MUSICAL. THIS FIC IS VERY HEAVILY TRIGGER WARNINGED! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED TWICE!

Warnings: firearms, mentions of guns, an actual gun description once or twice, faking of sewerslide (yes, just like in the scene in both the movie and musical), extreme violence in the name of society, mention of bombs, mention of terrorist act

~~~~~~~~~~

It had finally come. The night of the pep rally was here and you were in your bedroom, getting ready to go spend time with Heidi after pushing her to the back burner. Your ex boyfriend took up all your time, but now that you’ve broke things off with that psycho, you wanted to work on repairing your friendship with the brunette. You had just walked out of your bathroom after taking a shower, wasting no time in getting dressed and sitting at your vanity to take care of your hair and face.

You had just began to comb through your hair when your brush slipped from your grasp, falling to the floor. Looking up, you groaned in frustration, your eyes flicking to your phone to check the time. You were already running behind, and it seemed like the universe just wanted to keep you from getting to the school gym on time. Bending down from your seat, you grabbed the handle of your brush, straightening your back as you looked back to the mirror of your vanity.

Your heart dropped into your stomach as you noticed an all too familiar figure had appeared seemingly out of no where. You stood up quickly, turning to face the figure as if to shield your back from him. “Michael?!” you exclaimed, disbelief running through your system. The tall male smiled at you, striding to your shocked form. “It’s me, in the flesh. I know, shocking, right? I figured you needed a while to calm down from your episode the other day.” he stated, reaching his hand up to graze your cheek softly.

You flinched away, your eyebrows furrowing in anger. “I told you to stay the hell away from me, Michael! You’re insane.” you said coldly, glaring at the taller male. He just looked at you with an unimpressed look on his face. He sighed, looking to the side and around your room. He made his way over to your bed, perching himself of the side of it. “Insane? What do you call yourself then?” he questioned, turning his attention to you. You opened your mouth to answer, but no sound came out. In a way, what he was insinuation was right. He was twisting your words in the way he always did when he wanted to prove his was right. Instead, you chose to ignore his words, not wanting to play into his mind games.

“Michael, for the last time, get. Out. Of. My. Room. Get out of my fucking house, and get out of my life!” you snapped, never faltering in your stance. He looked at you, an unreadable look on his face. You could see his eyes were sizing you up, but you couldn’t discern the emotion rest of his face. He scoffed, a smirk spreading across his mouth. “I don’t think this whole spat we’re having right now is gonna end in the way either of us want it to. So why don’t we just forget about everything that’s happened and start over?” Michael announced, holding his hand out. “Greetings and salutations.” he finished, his signature smirk on his face.

You stared at him incredulously. “You’re a psychotic asshole,” were the only words that fell from your mouth. His face dropped for a moment, before he started laughing. “Come on, (Y/n)! Let’s go to that stupid rally and put everything behind us.” he coaxed, standing from your bed. It was in that moment that you finally noticed the gun in his hand, finger resting lazily on the trigger. With minimal thinking, you darted into your closet, shutting your door and making a makeshift lock. You pulled a pile of clothes over you, hiding in the safety of the dark room. His familiar foot steps sounded until they were just outside of the closed door. “All is forgiven, baby! Come on, get dressed, you’re my date to the pep rally tonight!”

You chucked me out like I was trash

For that you should be dead..

But!

Then it hit me like a flash

What if high school went away instead?

Those assholes are the key!

They're keeping you away from me!

They made you blind, messed up your mind

But I can set you free!

Your heart raced and your mind ran a mile a minute. Away from all of his delusions for a few days, you wracked your brain trying to decipher his words. Messed up your mind? The only one who’s messed up your mind was him. He was the one who ruined your mind. It was Michael and his actions that deluded your mind. You always thought clearly until he metaphorically got you in a chokehold over him. You stared intently out the door, like a prey waiting for the predator on the other side to break the door down.

You left me and I fell apart

I punched the wall and cried..

Bam!

Then I found you changed my heart and set loose all that truthful shit inside!

And so I built a bomb

Tonight our school is Vietnam!

Let's guarantee they'll never see their senior prom!

Your eyes widened. You felt like you were going to throw up at his haunting words. You slowly slid your hands down to feel your pockets, searching for your phone to call the cops, to call Heidi, to call your parents, to just let someone know what was going on. Your heart dropped as you remembered it was sitting on your vanity. Cursing yourself for not grabbing it, tears flowed endlessly down your cheeks. Your mind raced at the thought of all of the other innocent people who were in mortal danger just a few blocks away from your house. His shoes blocked the light coming in from the bottom of the closet, signaling he was still just waiting beyond the door, torturing you with his presence.

I was meant to be yours!

We were meant to be one!

Don't give up on me now!

Finish what we've begun!

I was meant to be yours!

Michael was absolutely delusional. And so were you when you were with him. He filled your brain with so much senseless bullshit that you actually believed he was doing good for the world. Now that you dropped the honeymoon phase, you realized just how sick in the head he was. The times he broke into your room out of no where, the cruel jokes he would play on the popular kids, the way he would gaslight you into believing that nothing was wrong. And now he was attached to you, just like a parasite to an unsuspecting animal.

So when the high school gym goes BOOM with everyone inside..

Pkhw!

In the rubble of their tomb

We'll plant this note explaining why they died!

We, the students of Westerburg High

Will die

Our burnt bodies may finally get through

To you

Your society churns out slaves and blanks

No thanks

Signed the Students of Westerburg High

'Goodbye.'

He was planning on blowing up the whole school as an act of protest. To turn around and shove some senseless notion into the face of people who didn’t care while taking the lives of over 200 people. And he wanted you to be there with him, amongst the group of those who are about to meet their untimely demise.

We'll watch the smoke pour out the doors

Bring marshmallows

We'll make s'mores!

We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!

It was even worse than you thought. He wanted you to sit from afar and watch with him as the blaze engulfed the school and its surrounding area. And he wanted s’mores? You had to do something to get out of here and clear out the school before he got there. Anything to warn somebody out there that they were in danger. Racking your brain, you looked around your closet, looking for a weapon of some sort. Your eyes instead landed on a scarf, and you knew what you had to do to escape your psychotic ex-boyfriend.

On the other side of the door, Michael had his forehead pressed against your closet door. His heart was also thumping in his chest, but not out of fear. Oh no, he was angry. He was angry with the school, angry with society, angry with you. So incredibly mad that you just brushed him off after all he had done for you. He had murdered for you just to show how much you are worth to him. And now you’re taking it back and trying to throw him out. He wasn’t going to stop until you had come out of hiding and came to watch the show.

I was meant to be yours!

We were meant to be one!

I can't take it alone!

Finish what we've begun!

YOU WERE MEANT TO BE MINE!

I AM ALL THAT YOU NEED!

YOU CARVED OPEN MY HEART!

CAN'T JUST LEAVE ME TO BLEED!

Michael reached out, gripping the door knob of your closet. He jiggled the door handle, expecting it to open easily. There was no leeway, and his anger steadily rose at your prolonged refusal to his offer. He looked to his other hand, at the gun he had brought with him. An idea rose to his brain, and he pointed the muzzle at the handle. He was going to get in, one way or another, and he didn’t care if he had to break the damn door down himself. Remembering you were in there, he lowered it, coming to his senses. He really didn’t want to hurt you. He loved you far too much to cause you any harm. He resumed to knocking on the door, sweetly pleading for you to open it.

(Y/n), open the- open the door, please

(Y/n), open the door

(Y/n), can we not fight anymore, please

Can we not fight anymore

(Y/n), sure, you're scared

I've been there. I can set you free!

(Y/n), don't make me come in there!

His anger was rising as you kept your silence. If he could just see you, just talk to you long enough to get you back on good terms with him, that’s all he wanted. He’d leave this town if it would make you happy, but he wanted to know that you weren’t angry with him anymore. He just wanted a peace of mind, to show that no matter how you felt about him, he’d always love you. He raised his gun again, pointing it at the handle.

I'm gonna count to three!

One!

Two!

Fuck it!

Horror ran across his face at your lifeless body hanging from the ceiling. He walked to you, falling to his knees.

Oh my God... No! (Y/n)!

Please don't leave me alone

You were all I could trust

I can't do this alone

He stared up at you, even in death, your face looked so sweet, so soft. Tears rolled down his eyes as he looked he looked on. He stood up, reaching out and grabbing your hand. He pressed his lips against your hand, setting it by your side gently. He was gonna get revenge for this. On who, he didn’t care, but he wasn’t going to stop until he felt like your life was worth its waste.

STILL I WILL IF I MUST…

He left the same way he came in, through the window. Tonight was gonna be the night he would remember forever.

As soon as he had left, your bedroom door opened. Your mother had come in, carrying some of your favorite snacks. “(Y/n)! I brought you a snack!” she called out. Looking around, she noticed your empty bedroom. She didn’t think you had left, so she walked in a little further, looking around for you. She stepped just behind your closet door, which she noticed was open. Swinging the door the rest of the way, she called your name once again before letting out a loud shriek.

You snapped your head up, holding your arms out to your mom. “Mom, mom, mom, it’s okay, I’m okay!” you fussed, your mom staring at you in shock, one hand clutched over her chest, the other still balancing your snack. You untied a part of the scarf from your waist, dropping to your feet and rushing to your mom. “I was just practicing for the day I run away and join the circus. Speaking of running away, thanks for the snack, but I gotta run! Emergency at the gym, I’ll explain everything later!” you shouted, running past your still shocked mother and out of the house. You were determined to get to the school before Michael did so you can repay all the karma that you owe, and you weren’t scared if you had to go down with him.

#sp goth kids #south park goth kids #south park michael #sp fanfiction #south park headcanons #sp michael #sp michael x reader #south park heathers AU #JD!Michael

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mirkwoodshewolf · 11 months

Text

Hellfire’s Mama fox; Eddie Munson x fem!oc Chap. 6.1

*Author’s note*

HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY EDDIE MUNSON!!! One year ago today you came onto the show and literally stole ALL of our hearts. Unfortunately I couldn’t get the whole chapter done but I’d be damned if I didn’t at least post up something in honor of the one year of season 4 of Stranger things for his debut. So to any and all readers out there enjoy part one of this chapter and I hope to have part two up in like a day or so.

Now this chapter specifically is set in Eddie’s POV cause one I said it could be and two it’ll really show just how much Eddie cares for Roxxi and it really needed to be from his POV esp. this chapter after what happened in the last chapter.

Warnings: Flirty Eddie MAJOR FLIRT AND TEASE!! Some mentions of angst, mentions of suicide (past event not current in this timeline), fluff, SMUT (the next part will be some MAJOR smut so underaged blogs or bot blogs you’ll be blocked I’LL BE CHECKING)!!

Chapter 6;

The Bard and the Elf-witch’s anniversary

6.2 CONTINUES HERE

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@waddles03

@psychosupernatural

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@queen-paladin

@assassinsasha23

@gay-and-ready-to-cry

@sweetpeapod

_________________________________________________________

*Eddie’s POV*

The rest of the week went by in a blur. Even though she says she’s fine, I knew Roxxi still kept thinking back to her encounter with her cousin Steve Harrington. God if only I had known, hell I’ve been over to Family video throughout the summer and I didn’t even see Harrington once whilst I went in there to rent Wayne and me a movie.

It was Friday and as unfortunate as it is, I had begged Roxxi to take a mental health day. She didn’t need the stress of Fridays piling up on her with all that’s been buzzing on her mind. And as promised (more like forced) I had agreed to come to class and take notes for her.

Truthfully I hated leaving her alone when she got this way. The last time she was like this after an encounter with Steve, she had slit her wrists in her own bathroom. Had I not gotten there in time, I—I don’t even want to think about what would’ve happened.

“Eddie, you alright man?” asked Gareth.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just thinking about Roxxi.” I said picking out a pretzel from my bag and popping it into my mouth.

“You still wanna go through with Hellfire tonight?”

“Of course. You know the rules. Just didn’t feel right leaving her alone today, that’s all.”

“Still going off about you know who?” asked Jeff as he sat down with his lunch. I hummed with a soft nod. “Say isn’t yall’s anniversary coming up or something?” I perked up.

“Already? Jesus Christ last year it felt like a fucking eternity for it to come.”

“Maybe you can cheer her up on your anniversary. You always seem to make her day brighter every September the 21st.” Gareth said.

“What’s September 21st?” Dustin’s voice soon spoke up as he and Mike finally joined out table.

“Eddie and Roxxi’s anniversary.” Gareth told them.

“Wait so you guys—are you guys really married or is it like—” Mike started off but I flicked a pretzel at his head.

“No you little shithead.” Not yet anyways. “Today marks the first time Roxxi and I met back in the sixth grade. She wore a Queen t-shirt, which I’ll praise her for. Her hair was done in a tight-knit ponytail and she had in her hands her journal which had various band and solo artist names written all over it. All ranging from Queen to REM, to Elton John and Bowie. Even Fleetwood Mac made the cut. She sat down at a table far in the corner, looking like a lost little fox kit. But that’s to be expected when someone goes from the 4th to 6th grade.”

“Wait she what?” asked Dustin incredulously.

“Oh yeah. Back in the day she was like a female Einstein or some shit. So much so the school board thought she could skip the 5th grade entirely and go straight into sixth. Which made her a target to some of the sixth grade bullies.”

“And one day I saw her being tossed around by said jerk wads. They were literally tossing her around in the alleyway between there and the high school.” Gareth first started out the tale I’ve always told of my meeting with my One.

“So gathering my courage, I preformed my best Gollum impression and made the boys piss themselves and run like cowardly dogs.” Jeff said. “But then, just as I was about to ask if she was alright, she looked up at me with those hypnotic, piercing (e/c) eyes of hers.”

“And it was then I knew,” both he and Jeff struck themselves in the heart finishing my tale.

“I was hooked.” They both finished together, to which the whole table began to laugh. I smirked snidely before standing up and chuckling alongside them as I sat myself between both Jeff and Gareth. Placing my hand on their shoulders, I looked between the two of them before quickly pulling them both up. I wrapped my arms over their necks bringing them close as I told them.

“And without the two of us, there wouldn’t be a Hellfire for you guys. And without her, you guys wouldn’t have become my lead bass and drummer for Corroded Coffin. So be thankful that I met her that day, for without her, there’d be no us. So show some respect to your DM’s first meeting, okay?”

“Yes Eddie.” They both shuddered nervously. I smirked and gave them a playful slap in the face as I gathered my shit up.

“Now if you all will excuse me, I have some planning to do before Monday. Hellfire’s still happening, 3pm sharp. Don’t be late.” I walked out of the cafeteria and headed to the library for some quiet time planning on how to make this anniversary more special than all the others in the past.

After school I went over to the payphone to give my Queen a call and to check up on her. The phone rang a couple of times, my heart racing hoping she’d answer until I heard the click and her voice came on the other end.

‘Hello?’

“There’s my gorgeous girl.” I said leaning up against the payphone.

‘I take it that school went okay?’

“Babe, it’s school. It never goes okay with me. Boring lectures and even boring-er teachers.”

‘And this is why you’re failing English. Boring-er is not a word.’

“All words are made up Mama, isn’t that why we have our own English language while the British supposedly have theirs?”

‘Touché I’ll give you that.’ I grinned victoriously.

“But I’m sure you had a more fun day than me. At least you didn’t have to deal with O’Donnell’s nagging voice for a day.”

‘Just sat around, cleaned up a bit, watched some TV.’

“See you got to have all the fun.” I teased and I knew she was rolling her eyes at me statement.

‘I also finished that last bit of leftover pizza from last weekend. So if you were looking forward to that, sorry.’

“No worries. I’m already planning on having something else for dinner.” I lowly sung out seductively twirling the cord around my finger.

‘Eddie Munson! You eating me out does not equal a meal!’ I couldn’t help but smirk. Oh man she was so easy to fluster sometimes.

“Actually sweetheart what I was going to suggest was some Benny’s but maybe I should go with your idea. After all you are better than any burger or milkshake they could ever make.”

‘I walked right into that one didn’t I?’

“Yes you did.” I heard her groan as I let out a chuckle. “In all seriousness, you’re okay right?”

‘Yes love. I am. You were right, I just—needed to take a day for myself. But that doesn’t mean this should happen more than three times. Remember we’re graduating together.’

“I know, I know. This will count as day 1. After Hellfire, I’ll pick up some Benny’s and then I’ll be home okay?”

‘Sounds good. Kick some ass and wow the guys tonight.’

“As always. But you know it’s not the same without my Dungeon Mistress.”

‘Get home sooner and maybe we can make up our own campaign. One on one.’

“Oh babe don’t tempt me.” I heard her chuckle.

‘Okay tough guy, I’ll see you whenever you’re done. Better get going it’s almost three.’ I looked down at my watch and saw that she was right.

“Shit! Okay babe sweet you love you so much buh-bye!” I hung up the phone and quickly raced towards the theatre to start the campaign for the day.

As promised, after the campaign was over I drove to Benny’s, picked up our order and then drove back to the trailer. I parked the van and right there on the porch I saw my beloved feeding one of the local stray cats that come by our trailer.

Ozzy, a skinny black cat with orange eyes was a favorite of ours. He came around just shortly after Roxxi had moved in with Wayne and I, abandoned by his own mother so Roxxi took it upon herself to feed him and take care of him.

“Honey, I’m home.” I sung out as I held up the food. She and Ozzy turned to me and Ozzy let out a loud meow in hello. “Hey to you too Ozzy, hadn’t seen you in a while. Hope you’ve been making good choices.” He let out another meow as he raised a paw in the air to the bag of food.

“Ozzy, if I’ve told you once I’ve told you a thousand times.” Roxxi started off as she picked him up. “You do not eat people food, it’s not good for you.” He let out another low meow as he squirmed in her arms wanting to be put down. “Now go eat your wet food like a good kitty.” She reprimanded as Ozzy went back to the can of wet food and ate from it. “What are we gonna do with him?”

“No idea. I swear in another life he must’ve been human.” I said shrugging as the two of us went inside.

“I wish we could take him in as our own cat.”

“Me too babe but you know Wayne’s allergic to cats.”

“I know. And I don’t want the old man to be held up because of something he can’t control. It’s just with Halloween around the corner, I worry for his safety.” I set the food down and wrapped my arms around her, burying my face into her neck.

“He’s resourceful, and cunning. Just like his mama.” She smiled softly as I pecked her cheek. “Now c’mon, let’s eat.” We headed to the kitchen and gathered our food before heading to the couch and turned on the tv.

“So how was the campaign tonight?” she asked.

“The boys didn’t expect that twist you suggested to me. Totally threw them off and fucked their entire gameplan they had going.” She smirked softly. “And speaking of campaigns, your upcoming Halloween one, you still gonna do it?”

“Uhh duh!” she said as if she were answering a dumb question.

“I just wanted to be sure you weren’t pulling my leg when I saw your holiday campaign folder. You got it all done and checked out? Sure you don’t need me to have a quick peak?”

“I already told you Eddie, no peeping toms at my Halloween campaign. Now did you managed to find your Beren character sheet?”

“Yeah. Finally after digging through my locker I managed to find it. Still haven’t found his figurine though. Jesus I wish I knew where that went.”

“Maybe I’ll talk to Sinclair about it. I’m told his sister’s been getting into the game and made the guys current figurines. Maybe she can make you a new one.”

“Ahh yes, Sinclair’s infamous sister. Wonder if we’ll stick around to see her enter High school?”

“Don’t go talking like that Eds. We’re gonna get out of here, and then every summer we might just visit and reunite with the Hellfire gang. And who knows, maybe Henderson could take over as DM when we go.”

“He does show much potential. Though the kid needs to get his ego in check, I swear that tone of his is gonna get him into trouble one of these days.” I pulled her close so her back was against my chest before laying a kiss to the top of her head and looked down at her wolf tattoo.

I took her tattooed arm and raised it up before lifting my other arm which had the fox tattoo and had our forearms placed together.

“It really was a great idea meleth nin. Especially when we have the other’s animal spirit tattooed on us.”

“If you ask me, you’re more of the fox than I.”

“What?!”

“Oh c’mon Eddie you’ve seen the foxes that come out every now and then. They’re full of energy, hyperactive and above all extremely dorky but they do it so adorably. If anything maybe I should just call you Papa fox instead.”

“Excuse me? Who are you calling a dork?” I asked offensively but in a playful manner.

“I said adorably dorky.” Well I wasn’t gonna take that lying down. Without a word, I stood up and walked briefly away from her, my back facing her as I crossed my arms over my chest. “Eddie? Eddie come on. I didn’t mean anything by it!” oh she was too cute whenever she pleaded like that. “Eddie please don’t be mad, I’m sorry okay? I just—” that’s when I made my attack.

With a cry I quickly gathered her up in my arms and carried her towards the bedroom and dropped her on my bed.

“You big, sneaky, son of a—” I then pounced on top of her, my body hovering over hers as I pinned her arms above her head. I noticed how her breathing hitched and I knew her heart was racing. I gave her a devious smirk before lowering my face down to her neck and kissed her pulse point, the one spot I knew got her every time.

I softly growled as I kissed and nipped at her neck while I felt her squirm underneath me and she let out her sweet little mewls that always got me.

“I am the only wolf in this pair,” I whispered huskily into her neck. “Ever question that again,” I kissed down the right side of her neck. “And the Big, Bad Wolf will come for you. And he’s not so merciful, especially towards beautiful girls.” After a few more kisses on her neck to fully drop her guard, I made my real attack.

I blew a raspberry right into the right side of her neck that she had now fully exposed to me. She let out a screeched laughter as I felt her legs kick under me but I placed my hips down to hers to pin her fully as I continued to deliver my raspberry attack to her soft, sensitive neck.

“Eddie! EDDIE NOHAHAHA! STOHAHAP!” she spoke through her laughter. God I swear no drug on earth could compare to her laughter, I could get hooked on it forever. “NO NOT THAT! NOT THE WOLFIE NIBBLES AHEHEHE!!” oh yes the wolf nibbles my darling. Along with raspberries she loved hated whenever I could give her some ticklish nibbles.

All across her neck and shoulders and even her collarbone I gave her nibbles, raspberries and ticklish kisses (with kissing sounds included). Finally I decided to take pity on her and cease my attack leaving her a panting mess.

“What….was that….for?” she whined softly as she tried to catch her breath.

“What? Can’t I show my best girl how much I love her?” I asked nonchalantly.

“That was mean Eddie!” she whined sadly. “You tricked me and then tortured me.” Aww my poor sweet girl.

“Okay maybe I did go a bit too far, forgive me?” I asked with a head tilt and cutely nudged my nose against hers as I stared deeply into her eyes.

“Will you give me snuggles and no tickles?”

“I swear.” I said crossing my heart.

“Then I forgive you.” I smiled and gave her a sweet kiss to her lips before rolling on my back and brought her close to my chest, her face burying just above my heart. I kissed her forehead as I wrapped my arms around her, my thumb stroking her bicep softly while my other hand stroked through her hair.

Jesus Christ how did I ever get so lucky to get a girl like this to fall for me? She truly was an ethereal Elven princess who fell for the lowly Bard Ranger. And come Monday, I’m gonna make this the best anniversary she’s ever known.

Monday soon came. The one thing that sucks about today is that we’ll have to spend most of our anniversary at school, but on a brighter side at least I don’t have to worry about not having one class without her today.

I got up as early as I could and started to prepare us breakfast. Now I’m no gourmet chef or anything like that, but I do know how to make a mean Munson Supreme (eggs sunny side up, bacon, and orange juice). After setting up the table with some wild flowers I had picked up outside in a cup as the center piece, I heard my girl’s footsteps coming into the kitchen.

“Good morning my Queen.” She looked at the table then up at me before asking me.

“Is it today?” I nodded as I took one of the flowers from the center piece and held it out to her.

“Happy anniversary Roxxi.” She took the flower and sniffed it softly. She came up to me and kissed my cheek lovingly.

“Who would’ve thought on a Monday you’d get up this early and do all this?”

“Ye have little faith in me my beloved. I’m wounded.” She giggled as she shook her head.

“But I love it Teddy-bear. And I see you’ve made your Munson Supreme.”

“Only the best for my girl.” I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her close and nuzzled our noses together. I forced myself away from her and pulled out her chair for her to sit down. She thanked me and I pulled her chair in as I gathered up and prepared her breakfast on a tray. “If you had stayed in bed a bit longer, I could’ve served you breakfast in bed.”

“Woke up to feel that my teddy bear wasn’t beside me anymore. You know I sleep better with you by my side.”

“Same goes for me Foxy Roxxi.” I winked at her.

“Your animal nickname is much cuter.”

“Yours is adorable. And sexy if I might also add.” She rolled her eyes as she began to eat her eggs.

“Agree to disagree.” Even though I didn’t want to, I nodded to her. “So, besides school, any plans you’ve got for us tonight?”

“And that’s where we divert from the previous years. This is a special anniversary for you my darling, you won’t know what I’ve got planned for us.”

“Okay I see you. Very well, I’ll trust you on this Eddie. But if you take me somewhere just to murder me, I’ll come back and haunt your ass.”

“Damn you caught me. My ultimate plan was to kill you by cuddles and tickles.” She playfully glared at me. I cheekily grinned at her before blowing her a kiss as we continued our breakfast.

We did our morning ritual as always and once we were backed up ready for school, I quickly raced out and opened the door for her as I extended my hand for her to take. She thanked me again as she got into the van and I shut the door behind her. I went back around to the driver’s side and told her as I started the engine.

“Okay sweetheart, pick our tunes for the week.”

“Sorry did you say week?”

“Yeah.”

“You usually never let me take control of the radio for more than 2 days.”

“Like I said, we’re doing things differently this year. Now pick which mixtape shall be ours today.” I watched as she took out her mixtape box from under the seat and dug through it until she found the first ever mixtape I ever made for her when we first began dating.

She placed it in and soon ‘Stand by me’ by Ben E. King started playing. I saw her tap her tall and index fingers along the side of the door to the beat of the cello blaring from the radio.

“There’s no one on earth I would ever have done this for. Not a single metal band song at the time.” I told her.

“It’s still so sweet that you did that. Thankfully by the next one you gave me, you had included some stuff from your bands.” She said taking my hand in hers.

“All cause you said you’d be open to hear some of their love songs. Sure some of them aren’t the normal slow, love ballad but the lyrics ring true.”

“Follow me now and you will not regret. Leaving the life you led before we met. You are the first to have this love of mine. Forever with me till the end of time.” she said quoting Black Sabbath’s love song N.I.B.

“Jesus is there anything more sexier than you quoting Sabbath to me?” I reversed the van at a normal speed before putting it in drive and drove at a normal speed.

“Is the Eddie ‘the Speed’ Munson actually obeying traffic laws?”

“I could easily put this van in park and follow through with my fake murder plot against you.” I playfully threatened her as I gave her the look. She stuck her tongue at me and gave me a cheeky wink as I drove us towards the school, all the while our hands reconnected and I stroked the back of her hand with my thumb.

As usual school went on the long, boring path it always did every Monday. However this time during lectures in secret, I secretly passed notes to Roxxi telling her how beautiful she looked, how smart she was, all the basics and plus a little bit more.

Along with the secret note delivery service I provided for each class, I also did my best to take as many notes as possible as well as praying to whomever above that they wouldn’t give us too much homework tonight, I got places to take my lady tonight.

When school was finally over, I guided Roxxi towards the theatre and right as we came to the doors she asked me.

“What are we doing here Eddie? We don’t usually come to the theatre until weds. to compare notes for the next campaign.”

“I told you my love, for our anniversary, things are different.” I snapped my fingers before the doors opened on their own (thanks tech geeks for staying afterward to help with this). Her eyes widened at the doors magically opening on their own. I held my hand to her and we walked in together.

Inside our D&D table was halfway set up with both our figurines of Beren and Lúthien standing side by side along with the D20 dice and a candelabra all lit up. I stopped her just short of the table while I came around to my throne, my hands leaning against the table.

“Lúthien the ethereal, Elven white witch, Princess of the Border Forest, you have braved through many hardships, battled demons the like of which no one in our company could ever imagine. And now, now you must face another quest. The quest of Two Lovers, and you will be the deciding factor in which path both Beren and yourself will travel. What say you my fair lady?” I spoke in my DM voice. She pondered as she looked between me and our figurines.

“What are the stakes?” she asked.

“A voyage of passion, bliss and a union of a bond the like of which had never been seen before. Or you end up taking them down a road of darkness, suffering and agony so horrifying and so unbearable that not even being trapped in a troll-hoard could compare to what could happen to our two lovers.”

As always when she was in deep thought, she took the ends of the right side of her hair and twirled it in her fingers. Even with the short curl, she still managed to twirl the multi-layered strand of hair around her finger. She then looked up at me and said in a firm, determined voice.

“Give me the D20.” I smirked and grabbed it before tossing it at her. She caught it straight into her palm and observed it.

“You get three shots. Don’t waste them.”

“Three shots? Pretty humble of you Dungeon Master, either that or very reckless of you for allowing me some additional help.”

“Let’s just say the three rolls you make will decide the whole quest itself for our Lovers. Now milady, take your first shot.” I sat down upon my throne with my arms cross over my chest as she held the dice between her hands. She first had it roll between her palms before I saw her shake it up and then tossed it across the table.

The dice bounced and skipped across the table board until landing on 13. Not bad for a first roll.

“Lucky 13, not bad for the first roll. The start will be fairly easy for our lovers to come across.” I took the dice and threw it back at her.

“You sure you’re not going easy on me today?”

“When it comes to D&D, I never kid around my fair lady. Let’s see what your next roll shall be?” she did the same thing again but this time she shook the dice up a little bit longer than her first roll before letting it go. With a skip and a leap, the dice rolled until it began to spin around and landed on 8. I hissed softly as I gave her a pained expression.

“Guess I went down the wrong path?” she asked.

“Not the best but I won’t say it’s the worst. Your last chance, and who knows maybe you’ll get lucky. I’ve seen it happen before when it comes to the wire.” I rolled the die between my fingers before tossing it back at her. She and I looked at each other and I gave her a slow nod.

She took a deep breath in before holding my d20 to her lips and began to shake it up. She had that die in her hand for a full straight minute before finally letting it go. It flew across the table as I slowly rose from my throne to see where this would all end.

The d20 soon began to slow down and start to pick where it wanted to go. I was at first seeing low numbers which made my heart race but then by a miracle, it landed on crit-hit 20!

“CRIT HIT!!!” She exclaimed. I threw my head back laughing as I threw my arms up in the air rejoicing. At least by sunset we’d get to the best spot in town and then end it all with a bang. I came around towards her and narrated.

“It all began where it left off;” I took Roxxi into my arms as hers wrapped around my neck. “Beren and Lúthien after leaving their company to set off on their own adventure together, they were settled in their cabin, Lúthien by the fire in her grand chair built by her husband. Beren had been noticing how his wife hadn’t been acting like herself. So he proposes; ‘My beloved, set your needlework aside. We’re going on an adventure today.’”

“‘Meleth nin,’ Lúthien says.” Roxxi soon joined my narrating. “‘We have seen many of the world already, what more is there to see?’”

“‘Unlike previous adventures we are not seeking the glory of treasure or seeking out new lands. But the pleasure of viewing the world with my wife. Will you not give me that?’ Beren asks his beloved Elven Queen.” I said as I stroked Roxxi’s cheek, gently brushing aside some of her tri-colored strands out of her face as I stared into her eyes.

“‘It does sound tempting.’ Lúthien begins to ponder. She looks at her husband and begins to understand why he is doing this for her.” She placed her hand against my cheek. I turned towards her palm and softly kissed it. “‘Yes. Yes we deserve an adventure. Not for value or glory, but for love. For our love.’” I smiled and I leaned forward and kissed my Lúthien.

“‘Then let us saddle the horse and be on our way.’” I said as I gathered up my D&D stuff and blew out the candelabra before taking Roxxi by the arm and the two of us raced towards the van.

We quickly got in and I started the engine as her mixtape resumed playing. But she quickly ejected it out and began to find a new one to listen to. She popped it in and soon Foreigners “I wanna know what love is” soon came on the speakers. This was the 2nd mixtape I made her, that I had added some metal love songs to from not only mine but the bands she was starting to love at the time.

“So where did you find Beren’s figurine at? And how did you get my Lúthien figurine as well?” she asked me.

“Turns out I left Beren at the last summer session we ever had at Gareth’s place. He told me last week how he had found it when he and his mom were doing some fall cleaning. As for Lady Lúthien, I have my ways.” I gave her a cheeky wink as I drove us to our first destination.

We first started off with dinner at the old 1950’s diner that I took Roxxi on our very first date. I still remember how she wore that cute black skirt with rose petals stitched across it, and a gorgeous blouse to match. Boy did I look underdressed but bless her heart she thought she overdressed.

Nonetheless she was a vision, and I knew right then and there I had to hold onto her and not fuck this relationship up. Fast forward to seven years later (three of them being just when we finally started dating) and we’re still together. Sure we’ve had our ups and downs especially this past year but we’re taking it one day at a time.

“Shall we get the usual?” I asked her.

“Whatever you want babe. I’m game for anything.” She replied.

“But this is for you Roxxi, now if you want something different I will give it to you.”

“You know you don’t have to go out of your way for me sweetie.”

“Spoiling my girlfriend on our anniversary is not going out of my way.” I reached out and took her hand. “I want to do this.” She softly smiled at me as coming up to our table was the same waitress who served us on our first date, an old lady named Rose.

She was like your average 70 something year old woman, however unlike every old lady who cowers everytime I make a public appearance, she saw me like her own grandson (whose supposedly a metalhead like me who lives out in San Francisco). She always told me to get my hair out of my face so Roxxi could see my eyes better and to always pay for the date.

“That time of the year again kids?” she asked us.

“Don’t you know it. Sorry we couldn’t do it last year Rose.”

“No worries dearies, shall it be the usual?”

“Yes. But instead of the chocolate milkshake can we get the oreo mix?” Roxxi answered.

“Absolutely sweetie, two chicken sandwiches and fries and one oreo milkshake coming up.” she took the menus from us and went over to the kitchen.

“An oreo milkshake?” I asked.

“The Dairy Queen up in Indianapolis had something called an oreo blizzard and it changed my life forever. It’s basically a milkshake but has oreos in them. When I took notice that they had some new milkshakes and an oreo was one of them, I had to do it.”

“Hope it’s better than your oreo and peanut butter idea. I still can’t believe you talked me into trying that.” I shuddered remembering that god awful taste. Now I like oreos and peanut butter as much as the next guy but combining them together, gross!

“Oh that’s rich coming from the guy who still drinks pickle juice whenever he gets the chance.” She mocked. When there’s absolutely nothing left to drink and all you find is some leftover sliced pickles, a rotten tomato and expired celery, you tell me which would you choose. But truthfully it wasn’t half bad when I got past the third sip.

“Okay kids here we are, fresh and hot out of the oven.” Rose sat down our meal as well as the oreo milkshake which I’ll admit it did look pretty good. Two main oreo cookies stuck out above and were leaned up against the cup, and I could see both above and through the cup oreo crumbs mixed into the vanilla ice cream.

Roxxi took her spoon and dipped it first before holding it out to me. I leaned forward and took a bite of the ice cream mixed with oreo crumbs and my god was that something I never knew I needed.

“Well? Pretty good huh?”

“That is the second greatest thing I’ve ever tasted.”

“Second? What’s the first? No wait don’t answer that.” I snickered as I dipped my fries into the shake before popping it into my mouth and we continued our dinner date in peace.

After paying up front and heading back to the van, Roxxi said.

“Now you said that my second roll though it was low, it’s not as bad of a path.”

“Ahh yes. Hold on I need to make a quick phone call real quick. You go wait by the van, I’ll be right there in a moment.” I pecked her cheek before quickly racing back towards the payphone at was at the corner of the diner. I dug through my pockets for the change and put it into the payphone before dialing up the number. It rang a few times before he finally responded.

‘Hello?’

“Jeff, hey it’s me. Turns out Roxxi and I will be heading to your place after all.”

‘She rolled low didn’t she?’

“If she had rolled less than seven then we’d be at the library doing our homework. So can we come over?”

‘Yeah, you’re lucky my mom’s out of town and my dad’s visiting my sick grandmother.’

“See you then man.” I hung up the phone and walked back over to Roxxi.

“What was all that for?”

“Just to confirm where we’re heading off too next. Now like I said, unfortunately it’s not a fun or memorable activity but it must be done for the fun to continue. But due to your roll of 8, there is a catch to this.”

“Which is…..”

“We’ll need some assistance with that.” We got into the van and I turned on the engine before pulling out of the diner and drove us to Jeff’s place. I pulled into his driveway and she said.

“Jeff’s house? Why are we here Eddie?”

“Unfortunately due to the date of which our anniversary on, I was forced to acknowledge that it was a school day and that in order for us to graduate, we do need to get our—homework done.” I shuddered at the end of my statement. “Seriously, why couldn’t our special day always be on a weekend like Friday or Saturday. Hell I’d even take the holy day of Sunday, at least then the streets and shops wouldn’t be as crowded.” I felt her take my hand.

“Eddie Munson, have I ever told you how proud I am of your dedication these past few weeks?”

“You tell me every day. Besides I made a promise, and for our day I’m willing to really make this work. Which brings us here, study session with Jeff. But his house holds a special place too, remember?”

“Uhh—was it—no it…..no I don’t.” I smiled softly and ducked my head in before explaining.

“Middle school, talent show. You had done the cheer thing with Chrissy Cunningham, and the guys and I had our first live performance as Corroded Coffin. We came here after the show when you both won second place, which was bull! You should’ve won first!” She playfully rolled her eyes. “We were out by his pool, and I looked at you and that was the moment that my feelings for you had changed. I no longer wanted to just be your friend.”

I stroked her cheek softly before brushing my thumb over her soft lips. I felt her lips pucker up slightly as she kissed my thumb.

“You never told me that.”

“Was waiting for the right moment to confess that story.” She smiled softly at me before leaning in and softly kissed me. I cupped her jawline and softly deepened the kiss but I had to hold myself back. Just wait Eddie, you’ll get your chance tonight. “As much as I would love to continue this, I don’t think Jeff would appreciate us having car sex in his driveway.”

“Yeah, and neither would the neighbors. Don’t wish to scar any kids with the van rocking.” I pecked her lips before reaching behind and grabbing our backpacks and we exited the van and headed up Jeff’s porch and I rang the doorbell.

He opened it up and allowed us to come into the living room. Jeff was in both our English and History class so we all agreed we could get those assignments done first before Roxxi and I would move onto our next two classes.

Now truthfully nothing really fun happened throughout this time frame cause I made a promise that today there’d be no funny business. If I got confused with something, Roxxi was there to guide me through it or explain it better than what was described on the paper. At least until we started our math homework, that’s when Jeff came into play.

Being in AP Trig, he knew how to read numbers and formulas better than anyone. So he helped us with understanding our math assignment until we had every last bit of homework completed. And boy did my brain feel like it was put through the blender then spat out before being shoved down a toaster and be burnt into a crisp.

“So what’s next on you guy’s anniversary plan?” Jeff asked.

“None of your business, thanks for letting us crash here Jeff to do the boring stuff.” Roxxi playfully nudged against me before she said.

“We’ll see you tomorrow in English, Jeff.”

“See yah guys, and happy anniversary.” We both waved him off before loading the van back up.

“And finally comes my crit-hit reward right?”

“You are correct milady. And a good thing we got done when we did cause the sun’s just about to set and hopefully we’ll get there before it gets dark.” I turned on the van and backed out of Jeff’s driveway before punching the gas and sped off towards our final destination.

Pelennor fields.

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