#fuckboy extraordinaire.

[wxnheart]

𝙶𝚛𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝙰𝚏𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚜 - 𝐏𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐩 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Make me remember you Like you remember me

He's the man you love to hate. Hate-fuck that is. Fucker is slicker than a can of oil.

What defines Graves beyond his ability to get under your skin is the fact that he does it with no effort at all. He can breathe and it'll piss you off. The fact that he knows that he gets under your skin and doesn't have to go out of his way to do it (but still chooses to) pisses you off even more.

To put the icing on the cake, you're a thousand percent sure that the root cause of your agitation is sexual. Because he makes it so.

He's not the gentle, encouraging lover that Price is. He's not the service sensualist that drives Alejandro. No... his sex is of a primal and teasing nature. You'll get yours. Eventually. After he's done with you.

Graves is the one who'll keep you sexually frustrated throughout the day. He's the one who'll hit you with a double entendre while in the middle of a seemingly innocent conversation; the third party in question would think nothing of it meanwhile you can't get away fast enough.

He's a crooner of the dangerous kind. You don't know if you want to choke his ass out or suck his dick. And his pet name for you? "Darlin'." Fuckkkk. The inflection never changes, not even when he's fucking you viciously or you're slurping on his dick something fierce. Always, always!— "Darlin'."

His foreplay is frustrating. Graves also leaves hickeys in very, VERY obvious places, and your lips are almost always swollen fucking with him and his searing kisses. Tongue and teeth, darlin'.

Has daredevil tendencies. Graves has no problem fucking you silly when there's nothing but the fucking door separating you from the rest of Shadow Company. You're doing everything in your power to keep from screaming the place down and all Graves does is smirk like the sleazy fuck he is. Careful now. Don't want to alert everybody now do you, darlin'?

Favors doggy and mating press; the former is all so he can make you come apart just by the way he whispers all kinds of filthy shit in your ear. The second is because he absolutely likes watching you come apart.

Orgasm denial while fucking you silly is another reason to hate him. Will always stop when you're close and then thrust back in like he didn't just ruin your high. Son of a bitch.

Is always in control even when you don't think he is. Goads you like a motherfucker. You think pulling a UNO Reverse and denying him is revenge? Think again. "That it, darlin'? And here I thought you were gonna surprise me." Yeah, it's that kinda ballgame. Wanna get yours? Gonna have to make him cum. Make it memorable for him, baby.

And when you're fucked out, catching your breath, here comes Phillip to goad you again. He's a little less smarmy this time, but you can't help but shiver at the way his eyes devour you as they trail up and down your body. "Tired already, darlin'? And here I thought you could last longer than that. Guess you can prove me wrong next time." Aw, fuck.

#cutie 𝓠. #phillip graves #phillip graves x reader #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare 2 #call of duty x reader #shadow company #nsfw. #fuckboy extraordinaire.

[pygian-weapon]

Jadzia sometimes is GuyTM, so I wonder if Curzon sometimes happened to be a LadyTM

#If you are more influenced by your previous host the one before Curzon was a woman (the one who slept with McCoy) #I hate how they handled the whole Curzon & Jadzia thing but concept whise it could make an interesting exploration #a horror story of some sort #Anyway what would fuckboy extraordinaire look like when tapping into his feminine side #ds9 #EDIT I got the host before Curzon wrong

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

Don't get me wrong, I love the dreamy fairytale-ness of the Ghibli movie version of Howl's Moving Castle, but the book. The book. Sophie, first off, being so incredibly set on being the boring un-gifted un-adventuresome eldest daughter (as is right and fitting for an eldest daughter to be) that she doesn't notice she's working magic, like, constantly? And when a witch shows up like "hey girlie you are fully working SO much magic that I'm feeling threatened, so like I'm gonna put you in the old lady dimension ciao," she's like well. That was weird. Anyway I guess I better go find something to do as an old lady. And she reasons that this famously evil sorcerer who eats young girls' hearts is probably safe for her now cause like. She's old. What's he gonna do to me. And proceeds to bully her way into becoming his cleaning lady. And Howl, known flaky whimsical fuckboy extraordinaire, is like sure okay I guess that works for me. And just as well because it turns out he's also a fucking bottom who kinda digs this strong stubborn lady who's steamrolled her way into his life, kinda weird that she's disguised as an old woman but w/e he's not gonna question her life choices and like it's not actually a problem for him, and by the time Sophie's figured out that oh crap oh shit she's actually kinda into this flighty asshole, what am I gonna do, he'd never return my feelings in a hundred years, Howl's basically accepted that they're mostly married. And also how can you top "my extremely powerful and slightly fey wizard is just a Welsh grad student who wandered into a portal one day" for a character concept. You can't. It's the perfect book really

#howl's moving castle

[emmitaaa4]

Addressing some fandom BS inconsistencies

Gwyn was shadow mommy, Az was shadow daddy, they were gonna have shadow babies with her extra super pliable bones.

I audibly chocked when I read this @nikethestatue (btw everything said in this post was on point). No but seriously this is how they sound, too many of them insisting that there is nothing wrong with basing the likelihood of a ship on who has the more suitable uterus to be with a man... cause supposedly they're just picking up on the hints SJM wrote for them? She likes babies for HEAs so ofc children are the end all be all of a relationship, plus there's absolutely no way that she could ever write an adoption plot SJM is literally adopted and has done it in other series. Selective reading strikes again.

A minimum amount of critical thinking would tell you that 1) the infamous *magical uterus change* scene was about nessian (& feysand), not about any ship; 2) if SJM had written Nesta changing Elain's uterus, it would have given too much away, not to mention 3) how disturbing/violating it would have been for Nesta to change her sister's reproductive anatomy WITHOUT HER CONSENT?! None of it makes sense narratively; my girl Nes would never, especially given the trauma they both suffered from having their bodily autonomy--and so much more--ripped away by the Cauldron.

This argument is so trivialized that I see it every other day on reddit/tiktok/*insert media app*, and yet elriels are the toxic side of the fandom? The ones whom people are allowed to insult, to ridicule for theories all made in good fun, the women that are villainized over a difference of opinion? Don't get me wrong, there's assholes on both sides and people keep calling one another variations of delulu (and the nastier personal attacks). But by painting this fandom-wide villain there is such a lack of accountability for the plethora of harmful talking points spread by other portions of the fandom. (I've been silently reading the anti-elain & anti-elriel tags for like a year, and I'm on tiktok. Yes, I have self-destructive tendencies).

Anyways.

I never understood either how people ever actually thought (or well still think) that gwynriel would happen BEFORE elucien?? It makes no sense logically, narratively, or in terms of characterization & the arc she's set up for Elain, Azriel, and Lucien. Yet it took one controversial bonus chapter for people to decenter Elain in her own story, that is make her choice of romantic partner--which SJM spent 3+ books setting up--Azriel's. It took one bonus chapter that soo many readers are still unaware of, to brush Elain off as a "sexual object" Az is using to distract himself until his therapist-extraordinaire Gwyn comes in and heals him all up. Because ofc she will: she's badass and not the "passive and weak and boring" Eplain (aka "Plant" or "brain dead gardener"), she fits the YA archetype of the spunky warrior-girl so she can handle his darkness, and SJM supposedly spent time fleshing her out because she wrote her as a LI for Azriel; she's made for him, she is what he needs to grow (I actually enjoyed Gwyn's character btw, just pointing out how silly it all sounds). “Next book is a love triangle between Elain/Az/Gwyn” “Elain will turn evil or is secretly evil”. So you're telling me that SJM would pit Elain & Gwyn against each other in a love triangle over a man... all because of a necklace that was not even mentioned once in the actual books? Please, let's be logical for a second.

All this because instead of reading the bonus chapter in the context of the books, some people are reading the books in the context of the bonus chapter. Which now that I think of it is probably why so many people mischaracterize Az the way they do--because yes we know enough of his character to know half of the stuff the fandom diagnoses him with is questionable. Azriel? Entitled incel x fuckboy hybrid (gotta be the first of his kind, minute slay ig)? Interesting tell me more. No joke I saw a semi-popular post on here where a gwynriel said they read the bonus WITHOUT HAVING READ ANY OF THE BOOKS. I'm sorry, ship wars are silly and believe it or not idc who ppl ship, but it makes it hard to take some of the things they say seriously.

All this to say that the fandom isn't even debating the right thing. If you consider everything SJM has said in her interviews:

(she's been planting seeds for Nesta & Elain's book since acomaf; she knows who she is writing the first 2 books about + is keeping things open for the 3rd one--with 5 different ship options--which automatically rules out "Elain will close the series"; she said she's doing research for Elain's book in the ACOFAS bonus & there's seeds for future bookS in acofas; all she said recently about her beloved *heroines* and the themes of fate/true love/choice she finds *very* interesting & wants to discuss)

and if you also consider all she's written in the actual books (elain's characterization + the overarching plot in general & how she fits into it), then it's pretty evident that Elain's book is next.

The question then would be who is the MMC / 2nd PoV in her book, aka would acotar 5 be an elucien or an elriel story? Because logically, gwynriel was always a consequence of elucien. I honestly do not understand how people don't see that.

Oh and they always think they're gagging elriels with the "obviously Azriel is the next MC" as if elriels aren't saying the same thing? And we're the ones twisting info and not making sense. It's just funny at this point.

---sidenote: I realize that this post generalizes some things, and I just wanted to say that I have interacted with lovely eluciens / people on either side of this headache of a ship war. My hard limit is Elain haters though... back off I say 🤺 BACK OFF 🤺

---sidenote 2: I would have written this as a reblog except im not entirely sure how tumblr works and I get no visibility from them rip.

#please be so for real rn #elain archeron #anti gwynriel #anti nonsense #acotar 5 #elriel #pro elriel #pro elain #pro azriel #sjm interview #azriel bonus chapter #nesta archeron #elucien

[fallenrockstars]

INTRODUCING MY FURRY GUYS I GUESS. OR WHATEVER.

Kicking off this account I guess with a selection of (at this point, quite old) Toyhouse icons I did of my miscellaneous OC’s. All from basically the same universe, but some of them may be part of different unrelated stories from one another

Below the cut, I’ll give a super brief description of my main OC stories and who each character is is.

—————————————— I have three or four story projects in active/current development at the present, but I’ll introduce the two most developed ones.

My main one is currently in need of a new title, but it’s a horror dramedy / murder mystery. about my fictional band with the tremendously on-the-nose name Dead Celebrities— whose rise to fame also coincides with a series of strange murders of several other prominent musicians in town. The story basically revolves around the members of the band trying to deduce who may be responsible for the killings, all while trying to stay alive themselves. The further they investigate, not only do they begin suspect one of their own may be the culprit, but that said culprit may be involved with even more sinister forces than they could have imagined.

My second one is called The Devil You Know, which revolves around the lead protagonist Nico who aspires to be a famous rock musician, but feels stifled by his chronic ailments and lack of skill. Through a boredom induced ouija board mishap, he finds himself summoning a demon who makes a deal with him to grant him otherworldly musical skill— unfortunately this leads to said demon possessing Nico, so now he must live with the experience of having the world’s worst roommate and a parasite wrapped up all in one ancient evil entity.

——————————————

As for the individual characters, I’ll introduce each in picture order from left to right.

1 / JESSE: Grumpy, broody, moody guitarist for an 80’s rock / heavy metal band called Dead Celebrities. Deep down very kind and sensitive despite what his aloof, offputting demeanor may indicate. Many wild town rumors circulate around him due to his mysterious nature, all of which are far more interesting than his actual life. Main protagonist of my murder mystery story. Also the main one trying to investigate the murders.

2 / CHERRY: One of Jesse’s best friends and member of Dead Celebrities’ rival band called Lost Daughters. A sarcastic spitfire and also her band’s lead singer. Is basically everyone’s wise older sister… even if she’s a bit smug about it sometimes. Part of the murder mystery story.

3 / PINK: Part of a story somewhat unrelated to the two I mentioned. His story takes place in the late 2000’s-early 2010’s. Former teen heartthrob kid’s sitcom actor turned somewhat washed up emo singer and social media personality. Has been cancelled every week for the past several years. Has made multiple YouTube apology videos. He’s kind of a fuckboy asshole (but he does redeem himself somewhat)

4/ WILEY: Weirdo bassist for Dead Celebrities and armchair paranormal expert. Professionally mentally ill, couch surfs and does odd jobs for income. Freaks out his roommates by doing seances in the apartment. Part of the murder mystery story. Is Donnie’s older half-brother.

5/ MEPHISTOPHELES: Demon. Nico’s parasite. Will drink all your pepsi and call you a bitch. Is the eternal spirit of a former musician. Part of the The Devil You Know story.

6/ DONNIE: Dorky rhythm guitarist and occasional keyboardist for Dead Celebrities. Painfully earnest and sweet. Has an unrequited crush on Jesse. Chronic nervous wreck but overcompensates with extreme friendliness. Overcaffeinated, sleep-deprived med school student. Part of the murder mystery story. Is Wiley’s little half-brother.

7/ EDDIE: Dead Celebrities’ drummer and casanova extraordinaire. Good with the business side of the band stuff. Gregarious, excitable, goofy personality. Really having fun with the whole rock-star persona thing. Think Jack Black type vibes. He’s also Cherry’s boyfriend. Part of the murder mystery story.

8/ RIOT: Part of a story partially connected to the murder mystery one. Goofy himbo glam metal party boy who don’t want nothin’ but a good time. Clinically oblivious.

9/ NICO: Perpetually anxious, poorly socialized shut-in with chronic illness and barely any exposure to the outside world. Craves a change of pace in the form of fame, but unfortunately a deal with a demon to gain said musical prowess resulting in said evil entity taking up partial residence in his body wasn’t the kind of shake-up he was wanting. Not to mention, the effects of acute demon possession have been taking a serious toll on his health… Part of the The Devil You Know story.

#my art #Oc #ocs #oc art #furry #artists #artists on tumblr #Endswell #Oc intro #oc introduction #oc stuff

[righthandoflight]

I really love when people refer to Gucci as Brnine's girlfriend and Ali goes "WHOA hold on ✋ who said anything about girlfriend" like Kalvin Brnine is THE nb fuckboy extraordinaire no one does it like them

#palisade #friends at the table #at least she can fight back meanwhile jesset is just #meanwhile jesset is just sitting there 20 yard stare hands clenched Oh I love being the guy best friend it's my place in this world #kalvin brnine

[hamsterclaw]

Fic Library: Taehyung

Stories I've read and loved featuring Taehyung - somehow he manages to inspire a huge variety of stories, from fuckboy to ghost to reluctant hero, and all these writers have done him justice as a character to root for. Please show these stories (and writers!) some love.

All I want for Christmas is you by @ladyartemesia reminds me of the best romance novels I've read. There's a slow burn, with fiery banter between Taehyung and f! reader, Jimin as an overprotective brother and Jungkook as a snarky aide. If you haven't read this yet - do yourself a favour and get to it.

No shade in the shadow of the cross by @miscelunaaa features Taehyung with his own demons to face in an unsettling tale. Em writes creeping dread masterfully. A story you'll think about long after you're done reading.

Weightless by @vyduan is set in the Her multiverse, an idolverse where OC is paired with each of the members in their own spinoff. Fascinating, clever and brilliant. This Taehyung is sweet, sexy, tentative and so so endearing.

Stroke game by @jungkussyficrecs features sexy, flirty, golfing Tae reacting to being teased by reader. Smutty perfection.

Closeted affair by @madbutgloriouspond features Taehyung and f! reader hooking up in a coat closet - with a very sexy and eager-to-please Taehyung.

Day 1 of Kinkmas by @minisugakoobies is a fun, sexy, funny, romp featuring co-workers/enemies Taehyung and reader and a Secret Santa present that's more generous than it seems.

Kim Yeontan, Cupid Extraordinaire by @bluewhale52 is a sweet, fluffy read with an adorable Yeontan.

It's sweet (Explicit) by @here2bbtstrash is a fluffy, sweet, fuckbuddies to lovers story that's heartwarming and soft.

Love you for infinity by @gimmethatagustd is a soft, beautiful story with a relatable reader and a wistful ghost Taehyung, and star turns from side characters Yoongi and JK.

#fic rec: taehyung #these authors are amazing

[tungtung-thanawat]

cant believe big dragon would be something i need to sit with/sleep on. really the most confusing part for me last ep was their conversation because what were they even saying? it was like everything they said kept flying over each other's head and it was so frustrating because it felt like they had their points and were having roughly the same conversation but also...not? and i have to thank @lelephantsnail for her tags on my post because it really helped streamline my thought about this.

this kind of subtle and nuanced form of miscommunication is not only unprecedented in thai bl but rare in media overall. however, it happens all the time in real life - where you are having a conversation and you understand each other's words perfectly but not each other's meaning/perspective.

b/c the truth is as fuckboi extraordinaires they have different stakes in this issue of Mangkorn's engagement and they're both right to prioritize their own skin in this game - in fact it's the healthy thing to do.

So some of the critical points of miscommunication in this convo (according to me) under the cut

whether or not to share this secret:

this was hard because on one hand mangkorn is trying to set a boundary and he does it in a fairly decent way: there's something im dealing with and i need time to deal with this and ill tell you everything when im ready. But...this is a fairly insane boundary to set with your lover esp when this 'problem' directly affects your relationship. Yai is right to demand to know more because you cannot deal with a problem affecting a relationship one-sidedly. But Mangkorn is also operating here in good faith - he has no intention of betraying Yai, he has all intentions of being with him so why does he have to admit something that will make yai misunderstand and leave him? Mangkorn wants a chance because being duplicitous is not his intention or his goal and its not fair that Mangkorn has to sacrifice his chance at love because of something that was decided for him. But Yai needs a chance too! A chance to decide if he wants to pursue this relationship despite the risks. And this is a good thing! Perhaps putting your life on hold for the dude you've been hate pining over and had one night of hate-love fucking is not the best idea! And thinking about his own heart and impending heartbreak is the right move.

He corners Mangkorn into telling him and Mangkorn tries his best to curtail the pitfalls - you'll understand me, right? im scared you'll leave me so you'll stay by my side right? - and Yai's answer 'its better than knowing nothing' isn't a promise that he will stay with Mangkorn. He's saying that at this point the only chance Mangkorn has of keeping him is by telling the truth. But Mangkorn hears what he needs to hear to tell Yai the truth. And so when Yai's reaction is this:

When Yai's first reaction is to think about himself and not focus on how difficult this situation is for Mangkorn (which it is!) it feels like a huge betrayal!

I had warned him it wasn't going to be easy and he reassured me we will be fine (he hadnt) so why is he saying this to me now? All I'm asking is for him to keep faith so why is he assuming the worst of me?

and Yai isn't assuming the worst of Mangkorn but of the situation itself but you can understand why Mangkorn feels so attacked because he's all raw and vulnerable from sharing something he did not want to share and his partner has reacted in exactly the way he was afraid of the most despite him saying he wouldn't react in that way (yai hasn't said anything of the sort)

And then being classic fuckbois - which honestly relatable - they say the absolute worse thing they could have to each other:

its like they picked the one thing the other was most insecure about and threw it in their faces which honestly was almost comic. they have tried for this long to talk like normal human beings and at the most critical moment of showing support and reaffirming commitment - they both default to their baser instincts of running away from hard things [which fair lmao].

And l love that they are able to call each other out on it! That they don't take the stoic okay that's done then bye! route. Mangkorn expresses what's hurting him - you're my partner and you're supposed to support me - and yai expresses whats hurting him - was giving me a choice in this relationship ever important to you? And of course Mangkorn just gets down to it. Things are spiraling and there's really one way out of this where they can stay together: that despite all the hurtful things they just said to each other - is there a way out of this together Yai knows what Mangkorn needs to hear but Yai answers in a way that is consistent with what he's shown is important to him: honesty and god is it heartbreaking and the way Bank plays it here is so GOOD

So no this conversation achieves nothing and narratively the two characters will engage in the terrible decision making that they would have had they not been so real with each other - Mangkorn will try to run away and Yai tries to distract himself. But boy, if they are to come back to each other in a way that feels realistic and not in a fantastical 'true love conquers all' copout way that can really only ever happen in stories, then having this conversation was absolutely critical.

#big dragon #mangkornyai #big dragon meta #big dragon the series #this is one of the longest meta i have ever written for a show #let alone for one scene #big dragon and its surprising amount of depth is a slap to the face for sure #gotta go and cleanse my heart! #i was promised nonsense! and i was given it! but with a side of whatever this is #nani's hot takes

[pasiveagressive]

Frat Boy Harry

Blurb about Frat Boy Harry 

How you had ended up in this position you may never know. 

You had missed one day of class, ONE day. The cute boy who sits behind you had offered you his notes, and with the big test coming up, who were you to decline?

Harry had said that he left his notes from the day before in his room and that you could stop by around 8 to get them. You knew where he lived, everyone did. He is Harry Styles, star soccer player, huge asshole, and fuckboy extraordinaire. He is a brother at Alpha Sigma Phi so that’s where you currently are. It turns out so was half or more of the campus. Harry had failed to mention the party that was happening tonight. You are not dressed for a party, thinking that you were just coming to grab some notes off a classmate you hadn’t bothered to change out of your Mickey Mouse PJ pants and old band tee. 

You grumble as you walk through the door, hit with the familiar smell of sweat, alcohol, and cheap cologne. The music is so loud you can feel it through the floor. As you weave through looking for Harry you see some of his brothers and try to ask them where he is, but they are all too smashed or too busy sticking their tongues down someone's throat to be of any use. 

When you find Harry a tidbit of information does click. He is standing at a makeshift DJ setup, one hand wrapped around a red solo and the other on a turntable. For someone who looks as drunk as he does he certainly was a good DJ, moving from one song to the next without a hiccup.

There are girls surrounding him, there almost always are, but he pays them no attention as he scans the crowd. That’s when he spots you. He leans over and whispers something to another guy as he takes the headphones he was wearing off. The crowd boos him as he hops down, almost falling but catching himself on a girl, who from your vantage point looks like she is only wearing her bra and thong. As he catches himself Harry also notices the girl's attire or lack thereof, his hands rest on her bareskin for what seems like an outrageously long time. 

You didn’t have a problem waiting when you were watching him DJ an annoying whisper in the back of your head. You shake it away as he makes his way over to you. 

“Y/N!!!! You came!” He slurs, yep definitely drunk.

“Hi Harry,” you shout above the music and crowd “ yes I came you told me that I could borrow your notes remember?” he nods his head

“S’course I remember.” The more he speaks the more sure you are that its a miracle he's still standing. 

“You didn’t tell me there was a party happening when you invited me over.” You said no annoyance was evident in your voice because he wouldn’t even remember in two hours any way.  

“You wouldn’t have come.” He pouts, you know that he’s right. As much as you loved a good party You had missed three days this week due to a sinus infection and were still playing catch up, which is why you need his notes. “Plus I wouldn’t have got to see you in your jammies.”

Should I continue this? Let me know!

#Harry Styles #harrystyles #harry #harry styles x reader #frat boy harry #frat boy!harry #frat harry #harry x reader #frat harry x reader #x reader #one direction #fanfic #x y/n #frat boy harry x reader #lot #harry styles fic

[ohvalleys]

( oscar isaac, forty five, cis male, he/him ) ☼ i know it’s a small town, but i run into CONRAD REYES every time i go to THE WIZARD'S TOWER. it’s like they practically live there and not THE MOUNTAINS for FORTY FIVE YEARS. it must be because they’re ARTICULATE and SELFISH. come to think of it, that’s probably why they’re a LIBRARIAN/TEACHER too. but i did hear they want to IMPROVE THE VALLEY, and sometimes they like to MINE. rumor has it they also like GOAT CHEESE, but dislike CHOWDER. what do you think?

meet conrad, your local pretentious librarian. he's valley born and bred, from a mother that's been in the valley for generations and a father that fled city life to join her and her family in the valley. they were quiet, and older parents, and his father was a big reader, so conrad spent many days indoors or at the valley's library. the greatest days of his childhood are when he got to go to zuzu city and visit its museum

went to the capital for college and then travelled around the ferngill republic AND the gotoro empire AND other countries that are unnamed because I don't know any more canon ones, and he will never, ever, ever shut up about his travels there. like a study abroad guy but worse.

eventually got a bachelors and then a masters in library science and settled back down in the valley with his parents because he loved it and them. he has an inflated ego about how smart and educated he is now, and has plenty of ideas about how to improve the valley. he talks to the mayor — and anyone else who will listen — about his ideas all the time. 

eternal bachelor, manwhore extraordinaire. thinks because he's self aware about it it doesn't count as an issue. fuckboy who will break ur heart :( but swings all ways :)

huge joja supporter and wants to expand and build in the valley to make it a more viable farming town or a vacation town without losing its charm. thinks it could be revitalized and wishes to see it be more bustling. unafraid to butt heads with his neighbors over this. including his own mother, who is ancient. 

deeply, deeply insecure and that's basically why he is the way he is. depressed sad man. loves the valley so very deeply and wants to do right by it, just has a bit of a pretentious capitalist man mindset about it. do you think you can fix him? vote in the poll below. 

a teacher in town to all the valley's wonderful children, and damn good at it, in spite of all his other issues. he's charismatic, he's passionate, he treats the kids like they're capable. loves to take them on field trips around the valley so they can do things hands on, and is MILITANT about vocabulary and making sure they read plenty.

anti tv. doesn't own one. says it melts your brain. inexplicably watches movies. 

pretentious loser. always has a book on him. smokes a pack a day and has a bit of a stardrop saloon problem, if you catch my drift. desperately needs to learn when to shut up. will quote pretentious quotes at you. performs his own original indie music at the stardrop saloon with his acoustic guitar. i wish I was joking too, y'all.

has a pet goat named yoba. but like, ironically...  he makes and sells his own artisan goat cheese.

#too lazy to do a silly little graphic rn lol.... soon <3 #dew.intro #conrad.

[daisys-gard3n]

mista calling his s/o mama (even if they aren’t a milf) makes my knees wobbly

Oh he just has that fuckboy/flirty energy that he carries confidently without shame. He's the type of mf to just yell over at you with his arms wide out like, "Where's my hug, mama?"

In a relationship, he'll just grab you up from behind with a flirty smile or purposefully rub himself against you. If you complain, he just shrugs. "Sorry, mama. God gave you that fat ass and expected me to not show it love?"

Also like...Breeding kink extraordinaire. He never hid the fact that he wanted a big family, so just be prepared when he has you bent over any sort of surface with his pants shrugged down and moving your bottoms to the side. He'll be muttering in your ear as he ruts into you. "A-Ah, fuck. Gotta relax for me mama, don't wanna cum so soon because of this pretty cunt. yeah? Fucccck, I know our kid gonna be cute."

#guido mista #not sfw #afab reader #gn reader #mama nickname used #jjba confessions #i'm sorry yall i have taken the popular route of making mista a walking 18 plus symbol im so sorry

[mermaidsirennikita]

The romancebooks subreddit casts Henry Cavill as every single hero including st Vincent and it drives me insane! Like sorry but a St. Vincent needs approx 100x more charisma than that

Lol listen... Henry Cavill is obviously an attractive man in the eyes of many, even the eyes of me... But does this mean I always wanna fuck him? Actually, no! When Henry is in a proper Zone (I would say in The Man From UNCLE or The Witcher) I find him very engaging and therefore hot. But he's not one of those people who is naturally compelling regardless of the role (like, say... I don't know, I think of Dev Patel in this sense). If he is in the wrong role or is not trying, he is very bland. Like, s1-s2 of The Tudors he had this smart aleck slutty man Trying and that worked... S4 he was dead behind the eyes. I find him similarly dead behind the eyes as Superman, but I feel like that was also... scripting and directorial issues...

The reason why Henry is cast as romance heroes often is because he is one of the only big names working in Hollywood right now who has the build people picture with romance heroes, he's white, and he's conventionally handsome. Which is FUNNY because a lot of romance heroes are not actually described as conventionally handsome. Derek Craven has crooked teeth and is "almost handsome"; Dain from Lord of Scoundrels is thought of as ugly (though that's also some weird anti-Italian shit from English people going on); Westcliff is a mid-sized block man; moooost Elizabeth Hoyt heroes are like... weird lookin'.

I guess you could say his Napoleon Solo had St. Vincent qualities, but I don't think that Henry is the guy I'd cast as Slut Extraordinaire. Also, he would look very bad as a blonde with his skintone, and if a white guy is gonna play St. Vincent (not a concept I'm married to, but let's say) i want him to be at least like... somewhat in that area.

The thing is that I sometimes feel like people focus so hard on St. Vincent's good qualities (the late book qualities, the qualities of his cameo self in other books) that they forget that this is supposed to be like. The sluttiest guy on earth. And you need someone who is clearly and totally oozing fuckboy.

[j-a-nuary]

Profiles: DownThyme

ChannieGames - Changbin's main support in the hell that is waiting tables, Chan. Moonlights as a video game streamer.

MinnowCooks - Minho works in the kitchen at DownThyme, and is also in school to be a veterinary surgeon.

drinksserter - If you want perfectly paired cocktails and desserts, you go to Felix. Just one of DownThyme's fuckboys extraordinaire. Might just be single-handedly doing the MOST for DownThyme's social media presence. Trans masc.

DownThyme - the official Twitter account for the restaurant. Run by the owner, but every once in a while someone else gains access.

[There are many more people working at DownThyme 【cough cough Ateez】 but these are the main three +official for now]

Masterlist

#Saprophyte #skz smau #skz fic #skz fanfic #skz x oc #stray kids smau #stray kids fic #stray kids fanfic #stray kids x oc #ateez smau #ateez fic #ateez fanfic

[jacqcrisis]

just learned military fuckboy extraordinaire, the reason i transferred branches to get away from him, the man who took women’s info from their bank accounts to stalk and message them on insta, who muttered about having an ar-15 (which he often kept in his car) under his breath when he got mad, who constantly cheated on his girlfriend until she found out and publicly dumped him by hacking his socials, who couldn’t wait to get deployed to go kill people legally in foreign countries, who joked about turning my pets into belts, who also made rape jokes and suicide jokes and who couldn’t be trained even by ME and called a coworker a bitch in front of customers and got constant complaints from customers, etc. etc. ETC:

Has finally been fired and I will be requesting a transfer back to that branch as soon as possible if my old manager hasn’t already done so. 

#jacq life #i found out cause i made a joke about transferring for sushi and one coworker was like #'did you know?' #i was like oh... do you guys still have x amount of tellers? #and i was promptly told to check the staffing changes #i got pizza to celebrate #i dont ever EVER want to have to see that man again

[piedpiperslists]

JJK: Christmas / Holiday Season AU

List of all Jungkook fics under 'Christmas / Holiday Season' AU:

*s - contains smut

* Last updated: 10/09/2023

D R A B B L E S

A Packaged Meet-Cute by madbutgloriouspond strangers to lovers Summary: Hanging lights on your porch goes a little sideways. Thankfully someone is there to catch you.

All I Want for Christmas by bangtanstanst established relationship, college au Summary: Even a night out in the cold is made better when you spend it with your boyfriend.

Angel's Bells by hamsterclaw s angel!Jungkook Summary: Jungkook's an angel with the personality of a fuckboi.

Christmas Kiss by kpopfanfictrash fratboy au Summary: “That’s not mistletoe, that’s basil.”

“Do NOT throw that snowball or else!” by breadoffoxy friends to lovers

“I will stab you with this candy cane, and you know I can” by v-hope established relationship

In the Frosty Air by gukyi college au, roommates au Summary: Two weeks ago you and your roommate slept together. Which would be fine, if you knew you both felt the same about each other. But you don’t. And now it’s Christmas, and Jungkook is still gorgeous and gentle and wonderful and here, and and you don’t really know what to do about that.

Makin' Merry by junghelioseok s established relationship

My Shining Star by mangowillow established relationship Summary: It's another Christmas spent with Jeongguk, but he loves surprises so he gives them to you in more ways than one.

New Year, New You by minisugakoobies s childhood friends au Summary: New year, new you. Except here you are, minutes after midnight, already falling back into old habits. You just can't resist.

Snow Angels [AO3] by goodsoop s established relationship Summary: Jungkook hates losing, but this time he’s more than okay with it thanks to the little distraction you pulled off. Sadly your tits are fucking freezing.

“So… what are your plans for New Year’s?” by breadoffoxy s established relationship

Suspended, Seduced, Surprised! by jimlingss enemies to lovers, huddle for warmth au Summary: Why the fuck did you have to be stuck on the ski lift with Jeon Jungkook, aka. cocky asshole extraordinaire.

Wake-Up Fall by fortunexkookie established relationship Summary: When you first snuggled up on the couch together, you quickly learned there wasn’t enough room for two people to lay side-by-side.

War by btsqualityy established relationship Summary: He knows better and yet, he continues to try you.

“We’re in an abandoned lodge in the middle of nowhere. Sure, you’re totally right, nothing bad could ever happen here.” by kpopfanfictrash college au

You’re Comfy by stayjimin established relationship

O N E S H O T S

A Holiday Snowdown by kpopfanfictrash s wc~36.3k / enemies to lovers, ski resort au, snowboarder au Summary: The Inn on the Hill is in trouble. Or that’s what your boss, Namjoon, says during the last-minute All Staff holiday meeting he calls. You need money, and you need money fast, or his parents are planning to sell the resort. When no one can think of an easy solution, Namjoon proposes his parents’ idea: a weeklong social media blitz with a celebrity guest. The celebrity? None other than Jeon Jungkook himself: two-time Olympic gold medalist, world-class snowboarder and the nation’s sweetheart. What’s the problem? You happen to have met Jeon Jungkook before, and sincerely hoped you’d never see him again.

* All I Want by chimoona s wc~4.7k / ft KTH, friends au, PWP Summary: It’s a Christmas miracle you caught Jungkook and Taehyung crossing paths under the mistletoe. Tis the season for generosity, and being the bearers of good tidings, how could they ever deny your request to watch?

All I Want for Cockmas by junqkook s wc~3.6k / santa au, PWP Summary: You tell Santa exactly what you want for Christmas.

Black and White Christmas by army-author wc~4.5k / coworkers au Summary: The black and white decor of your office is exceptionally drab, but Jungkook brings a splash of colour to your otherwise boring existence.

Christmas Cream(pie) by smoochkooks s wc~3.6k / established relationship Summary: A day before Christmas dinner with your boyfriend’s parents, you discover another alternative way to use the chocolate cream you’re making. Jungkook is more than willing to indulge in your little fantasy.

Christmas Is Waiting for You [AO3] by lamourche s wc~10k / rivals to lovers, phone sex au Summary: Being home for the holidays surrounded by your well-meaning family isn’t that bad. All you have to do is (1) survive the Andersons’ annual Christmas Eve party, (2) avoid all questions about your job, and (3) avoid your high school nemesis and crush, Jeon Jungkook.

Christmas Kisses by euphoricfilter wc~3k / established relationship Summary: It’s not often your boyfriend calls you with a cryptic message to come over; especially when he’s meant to be at his parents’ place for the holidays.

Frost Impressions by fortunexkookie s wc~41.3k / enemies to lovers, teachers au Summary: Jeongguk is so disgustingly smitten with his new coworker that he ends up making a terrible first impression, and neither of them realize they’ve actually been in love with each other for the better part of a decade.

Holidating by yeojaa s wc~12.8k / friends to lovers Summary: In life, there are certain things that go together, two parts that make up a whole. The sun in the sky, grandmothers and cheek kisses, chocolate when you’re sad—and you and Jeon Jungkook. Best friends since childhood, there’s never been one without the other. You’ve always existed this way, caught in each other’s orbit. Parallel lines that run side by side. But what happens when those lines finally collide? (or: how to lose a best friend in ten days.)

I'll Be Home by wwilloww s wc~22.3k / childhood friends to lovers, fantasy au Summary: When your first love, Jungkook, disappeared from your village five years ago, no one thought he would return, let alone on the night of your betrothal to another man.

Last Christmas by whatifyoulivelikethat s wc~7.5k / neighbors au Summary: Last Christmas, she gave you her heart, wrapped up with a note saying, I love you. She meant it. This Christmas, you give her back the stuff she left at your place and run into her next-door neighbor that knew all about your love. Somehow, you end up explaining why it went wrong.

Make It Feel Like Christmas by yoongiphoria s wc~2.9k / friends to lovers, college au Summary: Thanks to the storm of the century, you and your best friend are trapped in your college town just before the holidays.

Mr. Ice by army-author wc~11.1k / enemies to lovers, neighbors au Summary: The boy living in the apartment above yours is exceptionally cold to you, and you’ve not-so-lovingly started calling him ‘Mr. Ice’. But when the two of you end up snowed inside your apartment complex in the heart of a blizzard on Christmas eve, his icy exterior begins to melt…

Mugs & Kisses by minisugakoobies wc~6k / strangers to lovers, barista au Summary: Jungkook has something he'd like to tell you, but he can't find the words. So he's thought of another way.

Snow Laughing Matter by taleasnewastime wc~11.5k / enemies to lovers, coworkers au Summary: You hate Jungkook, have hated him since your first day when you overheard him talking about you in the kitchen, so it’s just your luck that you have to organise the work Christmas party with him. You’ll do anything to not interact with him, but the more you get to know him, the more you realise that maybe he’s not as nasty as you have built him up to be.

Snowballing by sintatae wc~2.3k / coworkers au

Speaking in Bodies by yeojaa wc~5.1k / strangers to lovers Summary: The holidays have never meant much to you - less a promise of Christmas morning joy and more a reminder of all the things you’ve lost. Some would call you a grinch; others, just a plain old asshole. Jeon Jungkook would call you both. The more time you spend together, though, the more you thaw, melting beneath the sun that seems to sit right in the centre of his chest.

Tinsel Wars by army-author wc~7.6k / rivals to lovers, neighbors au Summary: You and Jungkook compete over everything, including Christmas decorations. But when your rivalry comes to a head one December, unspoken feelings bubble to the surface beyond the glare of Christmas lights…

Up To Snow Good by aredheadedmess wc~5.1k / enemies to lovers, neighbors au Summary: It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt.

Where You Belong by kerikaaria wc~5.6k / vampire!Jungkook, brother's best friend Summary: It took Jimin three weeks to convince Jungkook to spend the holiday break at his family’s house. Why he conceded at all, he had no idea because Jungkook knew it was a bad idea not only with what he was, but also since he had the biggest crush on you, Jimin’s sister. He had a feeling that whatever happened, he wasn’t going to make it out of this quite the same.

#jjk list #jungkook fic

[narrie]

Of course it was 2013 Harry doing that throwing girls into the pool shit lmao fuckboy extraordinaire

🙄 when he used to do that dirty dancing stunt with girls...need to slap him so bad

#ask