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#hopefully this all made sense

nursc · 3 months

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hey guys, thank you all so much for the messages, they really mean a lot. i'm still feeling kind of... weird? like, not exactly the right frame of mind to be in the rpc in a healthy way so i'm going to remain quiet during the next few days, chilling in discord from time to time (mostly just random messages about crochet or chicago fire tbh, that's all my brain is processing right now). but i'm feeling better, feeling in one-piece, just... withdrawn. but, i don't mind receiving messages, i do prefer getting them if you are thinking about me cause it's like a little hug <3

#˗ˏˋ ― that gal on argelius ii. ， 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛. ´ˎ˗#hopefully this all made sense

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the-sunshine-dragon · 4 months

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Also 2, 4, 16, and 21 for the soft kpop asks!

2. My initial reaction was Seonghwa. Maybe that's because of his patience in how he deals with the wild animals he sometimes calls members.

4. Ooooooooo. Key, maybe? I don't have a particular reason why, maybe he seems like the type that would know a bit about stars?

16. Going to a market, like one of the food ones I can't remember the name of, or being able to explore Seoul from the perspective of someone who lives there.

21. Ah, okay, so. *steeples fingers* Technically I don't have a bias, technically I have one. It's complicated. But the idols I tend to gravitate towards the most are the ones that have the same mbti as me (or did, I'm looking at you, Seonghwa). It's always interesting to me to watch people with similar personalities in different walks of life, in different situations, because I feel that it sometimes helps me understand myself better? Even if a lot of kpop is acting and masking, I think the right groups in the right situations have the chance to be honest sometimes with who they are and how they react to things.

#hi rae #sorry you're catching me awake before dawn and sick #hopefully this all made sense #thanks for the ask!

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skelecentral · 3 months

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Some more hcs I’m too lazy to write out by hand:

Internal betrayal regards intention/desire/conflicting character traits. Has to do with shame and self-hatred.

Examples of internal betrayal might be: an integrity soul desiring to harm someone, a determination soul giving up before they start, a bravery soul grappling with fear, or a patience soul finding themselves struggling with self control.

External betrayal regards action. Has to do with guilt and corruption.

Examples of external betrayal might be: a justice soul screaming at someone undeserving in a moment of rage, a kindness soul having ulterior motives to their kind actions, or a perseverance soul ghosting someone after a bad interaction.

Whether fissures form/how they form is involved entirely in the soul’s perception of the betrayal (or lack thereof). If a human does not feel they’ve done anything that conflicts with their trait, a fissure will not form, even if it might seem it should (a justice soul might feel justified in taking two eyes and a limb from someone who stole their wallet). The opposite principle also holds true - if a human feels they’ve done something that conflicts with their trait, even if it doesn’t seem like they have, a fissure will still form (a perseverance soul might feel guilty for abandoning something important to them after significant burnout). If a soul does perceive a betrayal, whether it forms as an internal or external fissure is also up to it. Not every action is one or the other.

Fissures come in different severities - most are small and heal in a short span of time, but some are deep and might not ever fully go away.

Fissures are a darkened version of the inverse color to the primary trait (ex. An integrity soul would have deep orange/brown fissures, a justice soul would have deep purple fissures, a kindness soul would have deep red fissures, etc.)

Fissures can also form in response to betrayal of a secondary trait, though this is less common.

Showing someone your soul outside of battle can be personal, but not as much as you’d think. Still, it usually only happens between friends and family - there are things you can tell from looking at a soul that not everyone wants to reveal (general feelings at the moment, general intention, basic character traits, whether or not someone is hiding something, etc.)

Touching someone’s soul is a bit different. You can garner much more information from the act (memories, regrets, fears, secrets, specific feelings and intentions, hopes, dreams, etc.) and it is incredibly personal — to touch someone’s soul requires them to lend you an inordinate amount of trust, and it is an overall a terrifying experience. The ecstasy of being known, though, is a huge draw, and many people push past their fear to experience it with their closest loved one.

#myart #Undertale #headcanon #souls #I’ve always loved the concept of souls in Undertale and I love hearing about theories on them #so I wanted to type out my own!!!#hopefully it all made enough sense -#some of the ideas I had were kinda hard to put into words 😭

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willowser · 1 month

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I have a thought and I’d like to share (if you don’t mind) - Bakugo with a pro hero partner. Like I feel as though all I ever see is civilian!reader or assistant!reader and that’s great, but I need me a girl boss who kicks ass and Bakugo’s head over heels, like I imagine this person to be so adored and loved as well - like the ideal “celebrity” so kind and sweet, well-spoken, but Villains hear her name they go runnin’ - everyone’s low-key got crushes on her, Katsuki’s wondering what the hell he did to rizz her up and because they’re both public figures, in spite of how naturally private he is, I think he’d feel more comfortable off-handedly making comments about her every now and then, showing up to events together.

Idk it’s just in my head

hello dear !! it's so interesting you bring this up, bc i feel like i actually have a lot of thoughts on this and i guess i've never mentioned them LOL

i think bakugou could have such a flourishing relationship with another pro hero.

like, i really do. i think that it's hard for him to meet people outside of work LOL so meeting/working with another pro hero is, i think, a very natural way to come together. i also think that bakugou would really appreciate reader's hard work ! their passion ! their motivation ! i think that would genuinely be such a draw for him ??? i absolutely think a pro hero relationship would really work out for him, and i have one pro hero reader wip and the dynamic between them is my favorite i think i've ever written, bc they just fit so well.

but i will say that this is not typically a reader i picture for him ?? as my go-to ?? it's always assistant reader aikhfaha LMAO and. i really don't think i have a good explanation why, but. something like—i like to imagine bakugou having a break from it all, and i just don't think he'd get that with a pro hero partner ??

idk !! like, if one of you isn't on patrol, the other probably is, like 90% of the time, and i imagine it's hard to get just free time to be together, bc you both would probably be so busy !! and if you were working together at the same agency or partnering up at random points, i feel like it would be so hard to come home from work and not. bring it with you 🥺 as a pro hero i feel like that's impossible, and were the two of you both bearing the weight of that responsibility, i feel like it would be hard to have a relationship outside of that ?? if that makes sense ?? and i also personally believe that bakugou has had too much pro hero at the young age of SEVENTEEN, so i like to imagine a life for him where he can put it all away, even for a little bit 🥺

you could definitely argue that having an assistant reader would be similar, bc you would still be involved in the hero world, but. idk. i think being there on the sidelines and being in it are different, and i like to imagine bakugou coming home from a long shift and getting to hear about what you did at your regular job or what you did in the garden, where you went shopping, etc 🥺 just. give him some normalcy 🥺

but that's just my personal preference !! though i definitely enjoy the pro hero reader angle !! please katsuki wondering what the hell he did to rizz you up LMAOOO tbh, i think if we ever were fed some kind of love story for bakugou in canon, they would give him a badass pro hero partner, bc i really think he would have a lot of respect for someone that can handle it, not to mention does it well. like. i think he definitely has the loserboy hots for them LOL

#✿ ask willow #i thought about this all day and i still don't think i got my thoughts in order LOL #hopefully this made any sense akhfah #ty for bringing it up though hehehe 🩷✨😊

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ride-a-dromedary · 1 month

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the darkest of nights, in truth, still dazzles.

a halsin fanmix [listen]

#BG3 Musing #BG3 Fanmix #Halsin BG3 #Halsin #Halsin Posting #my fanmix #i give up this is about as done as it will ever be - i've been talking about this enough i need to get it away from me #i could have made at least one or two other playlists with the number of songs i cut from this #there were some things that hurt me to cut but i figured others had them in their playlists so they're out there #(the impossible dream you will always be famous i am so sorry :(()#i had three goals with this 1. make it more of a timeline in that it follows a narrative order (which hopefully is easy enough to follow)#(it makes sense to me about as much as it is ever going to lol)#2. try to avoid using songs that other individuals have used in their playlists (with a handful of exceptions - i highly encourage you also #take a listen to the others around! lots of good stuff and i figured if you were missing it from this one you can find another with it)#(and if i did use one the context might be different #'closer here is being used in a different way than i usually see it - it's putting more emphasis on the 'you can have my isolation' bit use #in context of the matron and patron for example)#and 3. focus as much as possible on non-romance path elements of halsin's character - i.e. again that's a topic that is highly explored #in other fanmixes to great success - this one is about the childhood he references and the adventures and the capture in the underdark #and the shadow curse and the burying of people he loved and the uptaking of the archdruid position and the healing he did #and possibly did not do #and the radicalization he comes into when his goals are met and he's faced with injustices #and the struggle he has of redefining himself and figuring out who he is after all of it #hopefully the 'eras' are clearly defined but hey it's all gravy from here #honestly if there is one song to listen to that encapsulates halsin for me it's tapestry - highly recommend that #anyway i am blabbing - let the lyrics and such talk for themselves jemi please #but if fanmixes aren't your speed have a kinda nice edit i guess #edit: now with bonus song i just had to add after shamefully forgetting it

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kingslionheart · 2 months

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I was wondering, do you think alfred and uhtred had feelings for each other in canon?

ALRIGHT SO. I'm so extremely sorry for taking so long to answer, life has been messy for a while now and I think it has been almost 3 months since you sent this. I have basically written this entire answer little by little every single day since I first received the ask and I have only just now finished reading it again.

EVEN MORE APOLOGIES BECAUSE IT TURNED OUT TO BE EXTREMELY LONG, I'll keep it under the cut!!

Please bear in mind that there are spoilers for the entire show and film and please forgive any possible typo.

OFF WE GO NOW!!

In general I think it is important to note that the last kingdom is a show FULL of queer characters (and I will die on that hill), mostly because there's just so much subtext in the whole show, and Alfred is 100% queercoded.

There are so many aspects of his character that just betray his queerness and the first thing that does that is literally the thing so many blame him for: the way he treats Uhtred.

NOW.

Let's look at Alfred's first scene ever. Alfred appears in 1x02 and he's introduced as someone who considers himself a sinner because of his inability to control his lust. When Beocca speaks to him about the girl he’s currently feeling guilty about, Alfred's immediate first reaction is to banish her, but instead he's presented with the option of bringing her into his service. Now the reason why it is proposed by Beocca is to keep her close to show God that he's able to resist temptation and, when he does resist, to thank this higher being he so desperately believes in. This is something that comes again in 1x03 when Beocca tells him to pray for strenght the moment he almost fails again.

In brief we know that there are two moments when Alfred has to pray: when he resists temptation and when he's tempted.

After he becomes king he reserves a very particular treatment for this girl who tempted him. In 1×04 we can see, for example, that soon after washing his hands, he basically throws a towel at her without a single glance. The treatment he gives her is a cold and distant one and that's the exact same way he treats Uhtred.

Indeed, as he did when he accepted Beocca's suggestion about the servant girl, I actually believe that proving God that he could resist temptation is one of the two reasons why Alfred has brought Uhtred into his service in the first place. The only other important use he had was his knowledge of the Danes, because, at least at this point of the story, the reason of him being such a fantastic sword genuinely does not stand.

In S1 it is very obvious that Uhtred isn't that much of a great warrior, and that makes sense because he's still very young, and at the end of the day he only first made his reputation when he killed Ubba, which, by Uhtred's own admission in the books, was entirely by luck, since he was actually the one who was about to get killed. Of course it is absolutely clear why he would have never admitted such thing, he needed that reputation and that was the first significant chance he got, but the thing is that he had been in Alfred's service for a few years already when that happened.

Alfred gave lands and a title of ealdorman to someone who was a 18 years old who came from Northumbria, a some guy who had absolutely nothing and no reputation whatsover, and that he himself barely knew, even worse a man who looked like a dane and that was a pagan. If you ignore Uhtred's point of view, that's absolutely insane of someone who just became a king who didn't even have that much support from his nobles yet.

It was serving Alfred that granted Uhtred to become an actual warrior with reputation, before that he wasn't one, as Uhtred himself told Alfred in 1×02.

As I said, the only good reason for Alfred to take such a man into his service was to have danish knowledge in court, but even that could have been something quick, you know, learning the basics and then just keeping contact with him as a spy, exactly as he did with Haesten at the end of S2 and at the beginning of S3, but no. Alfred tried his very best to tie him down to Wessex and make sure that he would remain. Why is that? It is to prove that he was able to resist temptation and being in control of his own body.

Alfred was an extremely pious man as many say throughout the whole show and even in the film. He needed to prove himself to God so that he would have had favour from his part and back then there was also the whole concept of "a king who's not able to control his body is not able to control his kingdom". Resisting temptation with a man would have proven it even more than resisting temptation with a woman, especially because, compared to the other servants, Alfred genuinely arrives to a point where he's actually and sort of obviously in love with Uhtred, so it isn't any longer just a body thing but a mind/heart thing, so even worse because that would cause his judgement to be clouded, Alfred himself admits this in 2x06, where he also says that Uhtred is a temptation to him.

The word temptation is an interesting one because Alfred always uses it with a sexual connotation, we saw that in s1 especially, but I want to talk about the episode I just mentioned. Here Alfred talks about Uhtred to Aelswith and he says:

What if all this time, it has been the work of the Devil tempting me? Offering me this warrior, this seemingly loyal and brave man, who piece by small piece, is eating at my soul and clouding what I believe to be right and wrong.

Alfred here, as I said already, explicitly says that he considers Uhtred a temptation sent by the devil, which, with the knowledge of his specific use of that word, can only mean one thing. The fact itself that Aelswith then replies that "this is what the devil would do" is noteworthy because that is a topic once called to attention by Asser in 1x06 when talking about Iseult he tells Uhtred "I know the devil exists, hiding within beauty is a trick he will use often, I'm sure". Aelswith gives Alfred a solution to the problem by telling him to get rid of him, and that's what does, he banishes Uhtred. Alfred talked of Uhtred as a temptation and then he chose to banish him for a while, does it by any chance remind you of something? His first instict in 1x02 about the servant.

Another thing that is very important to point out is that, as I said before, Alfred is considered a pious christian, so we know that Alfred prays daily and a lot, he even uses prayers to establish a political connection most of the times, but that can't prove his piety because many did too. The only times Alfred proves his piety are those when he prays alone and that happens 3 times in 3 seasons, which is funny since we could have expected way more for his reputation, but since it happens so little there has to be a meaning. As we said, we know that Alfred has to pray in two specific moments: when he has to thank God for resisting temptation and when he's tempted.

So very casually the times where he prays alone are always connected to Uhtred.

The first moment it happens is in 2x06, before the scene when Alfred admits that Uhtred tempts him and after the scene when Alfred screams at Uhtred "I do not know you and I could never know you", which is totally "know" as the biblical meaning of the word, if we consider everything that I have said before. The two other times are in s3, when Alfred's love for Uhtred is way more obvious and rather in a more romantic way than just attraction. The first time in that season is in 3x03 when he's there praying, with tears in his eyes, a few weeks (perhaps even a month) after Uhtred has betrayed him, and there he speaks of him and we see that he's hurt and wants to hurt Uhtred in return, so there's an element of heartbreak. The second time is in 3x06, after he has seen Uhtred again for the first time since his betrayal, and there we can find something close to worry for Uhtred's condition as a pagan, because he says that "He is a man in great need of the guidance of God". In 3x08 there's also an interesting hint about his prayers when Beocca hypothyses that Alfred prays for Uhtred's return and the truth behind it is written plainly on Alfred's face. His prayers shifted from a physical attraction type of temptation to something that could very clearly be recognised as love.

S3 is THE proof that Alfred was in love with Uhtred and, while you can already see it in the first episode of it when he watched Uhtred ride away from the city (which he also did in 1×02), that love becomes more obvious immediately after Uhtred betrays him in 3x02, YES THAT SCENE WHEN HE’S CRYING ALONE IN THE ROOM. While I do realise that it could be interpred as crying because his dream of an england was in danger, STILL you know that it is not just that, that man was heartbroken and the worst thing about it is that Alfred totally knew that he had no one to blame but himself, because Alfred is always perfectly aware of the way he treats Uhtred, think about the “I do not, I cannot” in 2x06 when Aelswith asks him if he trusts him, Alfred cannot trust Uhtred because if he did then he would totally fall into temptation, I MEAN LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED TO AETHELSTAN WITH INGILMUNDR.

From that episode onward Alfred is on another level of misery, and that’s truly an achievement considering how miserable that man always is. First of all he’s angrier than ever and that anger reaches levels of revenge, confirmed by Alfred himself in 3×09 when he says this:

It was done to damn you. To inflict pain, possibly. I try to make decisions rationally. However, taking your children was not a rational decision. It was thoughtless. It was selfish.

Here Alfred admits that he wanted to hurt Uhtred and why did he do that? Because he wasn’t thinking rationally, and why wasn’t he thinking rationally? Because it concerned Uhtred. This literally always goes back to 2x06, because Alfred did say there that Uhtred clouded his judgment and that is the proof. When it comes to Uhtred, when Uhtred is around, he just can’t think rationally. That’s literally some romantic shit there.

I made the example of Aethelstan and Ingilmundr earlier and that truly fits this whole part really well, because in the film Aethelstan is portrayed as someone who’s blind and acting in a completely irrational way because he’s in love with Ingilmundr, his oathman. I would also love to point out how Aethelstan is portrayed as a pious christian king who prays and acts only for his own salvation, since he considers himself a sinner for his queerness. There’s so much guilt in that boy and, especially, more than once he’s compared to Alfred: first by Ingilmundr who tells him that he has to be pious so that men would speak of him as they spoke of his grandfather, and second when Aethelstan talks to Uhtred and indirectly compares his sins as worse than the ones of Alfred, so the connection between them is not only about piety, but also sins. Then, no less important, I think it is quiet obvious who Ingilmundr reminds of considering how he was “born a dane but raised saxon”. The parallels are right there and have never been louder.

Another parallel that I want to point out is the connotation between homosexuality and England, that’s particularly connected to the film because in SKMD Aethelstan wants to unite it simply to redeem himself for having a male lover:

Ingilmundr: Perhaps return to your grandfather’s vision for England. Perhaps now there is an urgency to bring the pagans to light.

Aethelstan: Will that cleanse me? Us?

Ingilmundr: Well, surely the greater the lands, the greater the faith. Go beyond what Alfred dreamed of. Look to the islands God made, not the countries ordained by men, and bring all to Christianity. So when you are judged, you will be found in balance. And thus may accept both the sin… and the conquest against it.

Notice how even in this whole thing Alfred sort of remains the greatest sinner of them all, because Ingilmundr here says to bring to christianity the lands that God created and not the ones that men, Alfred, wanted to make, it almost feels as if he’s saying that his sin would only be accepted if he does what God offers him in lands and therefore if he doesn’t put himself above God by being the one who decides which parts to unite and which not. Here Alfred is truly portrayed as someone who has put himself above God in his decisions and thus England would have never cleansed him for his sins, because he was directly sinning while planning it and actually, always back in 2x06, Alfred too considered himself a sinner for the way he was laying the fundations of the country, but not in the way Ingilimundr meant but because “I am reaching out for an England, all in the name of God, yet I am relying upon the strength of a heathen”, so what made him a sinner was his connection to Uhtred.

The thing is that as a consequence in the film England is connected to carnal sins and, indeed, as you have probably realised already when you watched the show, that country has ALWAYS been put in some sexual way, you may call it Alfred’s fav kink. That seriously begins in 1x03 when Alfred is making out with that servant (the same one we have talked about before) and he literally goes like “I will defend you with my life, you stand as everything that is precious, you are Wessex, England, always to be cherished, never to be violated, only to be loved, vigorously”, therefore Alfred arrived to the point of seeing someone as a personification of England and that happens only another time in the show and that is in 2x03 when he says to Uhtred “You are a Saxon who is also a Dane, The very embodiment of the England that must emerge”.

THE VERY EMBODIMENT.

To him Uhtred was the personification of England and now this might be a bittttt too much from me, but even in 3x09 when Alfred is dying his last conversation is about Uhtred and the role he will have in the formation of England, and there Aelswith is trying to make Alfred see that it is wrong because being guided (SO RELYING) by a pagan means straying from God’s rightenous path, but what does Alfred do? He literally defends Uhtred and those are his last few breaths, what has Alfred said to that servant? “I will defend you with my life, […] you are […] England”, and look at Alfred’s final words:

Aelswith: Why are the Danes forever at our door? Because we are being punished, Lord, for the presence of this heathen.

Alfred: He is for England.

Aelswith: He is an outlaw.

Alfred: My England... my love.

Alfred basically dies defending Uhtred and while “My England” could be interpreted as him thinking about the actual country, the whole conversation and the whole parallels both between 1x03 and 2x03, so with the knowledge that to him Uhtred is England, I DON’T KNOW I JUST CAN’T HELP BUT THINK “HMM YOU KNOW WHAT, PERHAPS HE WASN'T TALKING ABOUT ENGLAND ENGLAND”

As you have probably understood, I believe that the moment when Alfred confessed his feelings for Uhtred was in 2x06 and he literally confessed them to Aelswith, so at beginning of S3 she has been knowing it for years.

Now let’s see all of S3 from Aelswith’s point of view. In this season her beloved husband is dying and she's painfully aware he is, even more after Alfred confirms it in 3x02. She knows it will happen, thus she tries to stay at his side as much as possible because Aelswith loved Alfred so much and despite everything (cough cough despite his cheating cough cough), then at some point she witnesses her husband's life be put in danger when he is taken as a hostage by the same man she knows he has feelings for. That man escapes and her husband is abandoned by him and, instead of seeing the anger he's showing to everyone, she sees how broken he is because of that, because she knows that Uhtred did not only break his oath but wholeheartedly broke Alfred’s heart. She has to witness not only her husband’s suffering because of his illness, but also the pain he feels because that man he loves has left him. The nearer her husband gets to his death, the nearer she notices the way he wants to forgive that same man who has made him suffer for years now (s3 starts in 891/892 and Alfred’s death happens in 899), then right before her husband’s passing she finds them together in his study, completely alone. She tries to make her husband reason (indirectly even trying to remind him of how much pain he went through because of him) but instead her husband orders her to leave, she probably hasn’t even seen Uhtred return from the room until late in the evening. Her husband dies not long after and she’s hurt because she has lost the man she's stood by and loved for most of her life, but in all of this… Who’s the one who left her husband? Who’s the one who broke his heart? Who’s the one who in a way could have worsed his condition because of the mental pain he had to go through because of him? Uhtred. So she imprisons Uhtred, threatens to kill him, but then accepts to just exile him, but then, in front of the whole of Winchester, Uhtred gives an entire speech about his relationship with her husband arriving to a point in which he even says that he loved Alfred. This is worsened by the fact that, in her last conversation with him, Alfred was going against her just to defend him.

Aelswith’s anger towards Uhtred is the most understandable reaction ever.

A very interesting scene to me, with the knowledge that Aelswith has this insight of Alfred’s feelings for Uhtred, is the scene where she prays in 3x08, because... THE THINGS SHE SAYS!!

Lord God, give me strength and guidance to do your work. If it is right and proper to rely upon a heathen, albeit for violence, then I beg you... show me a sign. Help me. I want my son to remain untarnished by heathen ways. I wish him to be God's king. Pure.

Here she’s praying for Edward in the prospect of a possible connection to Uhtred in case the latter becomes his oathman once he’s king, but it is the last part of the whole prayer that is fascinating, because in this moment she says what a king is if he’s connected to him and, therefore, the reference to Alfred is undeniable: the king had to be “untarnished by heathen ways” so that he could be “God’s king” and “pure”.

Alfred was connected to Uhtred so he was tarnished by heathen ways, he was not God’s king and he was not pure, all because of it.

Alfred eveasdropped this whole thing and when Aelswith noticed him, they both understood exactly what she was truly talking about and the expression on Alfred’s face was one of someone who actually believed those things about himself as well, and indeed you see that a lot in S3 when he shows more than once that he’s scared that he won’t end up in heaven. In 2x06 there's also another hint at that when he says “I am reaching out for an England, all in the name of God, yet I am relying upon the strength of a heathen, the iron of a pagan”, and when Aelswith tells him “You are God's king, lord" his answer is "Yet at my right hand is a pagan”.

Alfred has always been terrified at the possibility of not ending up in heaven because of what he had with Uhtred, but despite all of that he's always defended him and saved his life multiple times, just as Uhtred did with him.

Since Uhtred arrived in Wessex he has risked death more than once in every season, and Alfred has always tried to find a way to save his life:

1x03, Ubba offered Alfred a peace for silver and Uhtred’s head, Alfred refused and told him that he would have returned to the sword if he didn’t accept only to be paid.

1x05, Uhtred unleashed a sword in front of Alfred during prayers, while screaming at him in front of many people of Winchester. That’s a crime that is supposed to be punished with death, Alfred made him crawl instead.

1x06/1x07, Uhtred, claiming to do Alfred’s business, plundered Cornwall and sided with a Dane against a christian king, Alfred was supposed to kill him immediately, even more when Uhtred, supposed to beg for forgiveness, decided to scream in his face that he would never kneel neither to him nor to his God, but instead Alfred accepted Leofric’s proposal of a fight to the death so that “God would decide”, that means he left the possibility of Uhtred’s survival, even more because he chose the exact day for that fight to happen, which, casually, was on the day of a saint he liked a lot, and indeed the day after he called Uhtred and told him that he didn't like the thought of someone dying on that day. He tried to save him by offering him the option of giving everything back and resuming the debt (since it was with the plunder that he paid it), but Uhtred didn’t want to leave Iseult, so he refused.

2x03, he sent Ragnar to rescue Uhtred from slavery.

3x02, first, he was most likely going to forgive Uhtred for desecrating the cemetery; second, he should have senteced Uhtred to death for killing a monk in front of the whole witan and then escaping (thus worsening his actions), but instead he asked for an oath and spared his life; third, after he threatened his life Alfred did order for him to be killed, but as soon as he escaped he simply banished him from Wessex, he could have made someone follow him, but he didn’t.

3x05, Uhtred was an outlaw, while he was in Mercia Alfred could have still had him killed, since at the end of the day he was one of his enemies, but instead he used the excuse of him having Aethelflaed’s protection. Alfred could have killed him and no one would have said anything about it, but he did not.

3x08/3x09 Uhtred was still an outlaw here and Alfred claimed before that he would have killed him if stepped foot into Wessex, but he did not, instead he even assured his protection for when he knew he wouldn’t have been alive anymore to protect him.

Now, I feel like Alfred has a sort of codependency when it comes to Uhtred. That man constantly wants him next to him and he almost needs him to be there, the fact itself that in 2x05 Odda mentions that Alfred always says the same thing about Uhtred’s hall in Coccham “every time we visit”, hints at them being there quite ofter and there was only a 3 years time jump between the first and second half of S2, so Uhtred has had those lands for 3 years, probably even less, so… Exactly how many times have you visited this man in 3 years, Alfred? But, whether there's actually an element of codependency or not, there's certainly something that pulls them together, and indeed it is explicitly said that Uhtred and Alfred are “bonded" and that for that fact alone they can't kill each other even when they should.

In 3×09 Alfred points a sword to Uhtred's throat and asks him if he believes he could kill him, and to that Uhtred answers “we are bonded, you cannot kill me just as I cannot kill you”, and it’s really fascinating because there's a parallel between that scene and the scene in 5x07 when Uhtred and Brida are fighting and, when she tells him to kill her, he screams at her that they “are bound as one, killing you would be like killing a part of myself”, and Brida and Uhtred were romantically involved.

My point is that it is for this exact reason that Alfred was never able to look at Uhtred and excute him as he was supposed to do so many times, even the only time it very nearly happened (1x07) he left before he could see it, and whenever Uhtred was hit by Leofric during the fight, if you look specifically at Alfred, it almost seems as if he couldn't breathe, so you know there’s a kind of “without you I would be lost and I wouldn’t be myself anymore” for the both of them, and you can see that especially in the one who had to live further when the other actually died: Uhtred.

Uhtred very much always clings onto a few things and people, but the more he loses those he cares for the most, the more he loses himself. S3 is truly the start of Uhtred’s sort of radical change, indeed the man in SKMD is almost nothing like the man in S1, and what made it possible was that season.

In S3 Uhtred faces many losses: first he loses Gisela, so literally the love of his life (she was and I will die on that hill), second his brother Ragnar, then he loses Alfred, and not even a few days after his sister Thyra dies.

Gisela’s death has started Uhtred’s fall, and since he got cursed and was, very understandbly, in so much pain, everything escalated very quickly.

He killed Godwin to defend Gisela’s honour and he was obviously hurt by what he perceived as Alfred’s disinterest in defending Gisela, as he himself in 3x04 complains about in a very hurt way that Alfred “allowed her to be called a whore” (even though Alfred did try to make Godwin stop, but Uhtred simply couldn’t hear it because he was too enraged), therefore he betrays him and then subsequentially feels absolutely so guilty about it that he arrives to the point where Leofric, as the personification of his conscience, lets us know that he believed he deserved to died because of what he did to Alfred. As soon as the first occasion arises (Aethelflaed is in danger) he immediately leaves, which you can see was already on his mind as soon as Brida suggested him destroying Alfred, thus he abandons his brother. He then finds out that Ragnar died and he thinks it’s his fault because he left him (though there could have probably been little he could have done to prevent it even if he stayed there), then he suddenly meets Alfred again and he sees how much he's hated by him, or so Uhtred believes, so he falls in an even worse emotional state than before. After some time, Beocca asks him to meet Alfred and Uhtred himself wonders “what makes you think he would speak with me?”, which just shows how much he truly thought that Alfred despised him, but he goes to meet him anyway and he speaks to him. For the first time since they have met they are honest to each other and Alfred shows him actual trust and even love in a way, but then Alfred dies not even a week after (probably the day after they talked actually), so even if they were finally at peace with each other, Alfred still died and they had no way to enjoy that tranquility.

Now all of this took a very obvious emotional toll on Uhtred and I believe that Alfred is one of the biggest because he knew that he going to die, and yet, because of Skade's curse as Uhtred believed it to be, he wasted those final years they could have had together. That man meant a lot to Uhtred and in the books there's this quote that always gets me:

I stood beside Alfred’s coffin and thought how life slipped by, and how, for nearly all my life, Alfred had been there like a great landmark.

And that’s so terribly true because, compared to all the deaths before, it is important to notice that Alfred was the one who was there the most, more than Gisela and even more than Ragnar himself, since the latter left for Ireland right before Uhtred became Earl Ragnar’s son. Indeed when Alfred dies you can immediately see a change in demanor in Uhtred, which is striking because compared to many other deaths he went through, Uhtred remains silent in face of many things, for example during Alfred’s funeral he's imprisoned but doesn’t say a word, the only time he utters something is to tell Finan to do nothing. S1 Uhtred would have never reacted in such a way.

Still in prison, you can see that he goes near a very dangerous edge when he finds out that Thyra died, and that edge is finally overstepped in 4x03 with Beocca’s death, and it is from this death onwards that Uhtred is a completely different person. The process started with Gisela's death, culminated with Alfred’s and exploded with Beocca’s.

As I said Uhtred always clings to people and Uhtred has always been sort of in denial for Alfred’s death. He always dismissed the actual possibility of him dying, even when he himself noticed the signs, even when Alfred himself told him that he was about to and yet that man was still there like “Skade preys on men's fears, Lord”, says the man who at that time believed every single word she said. The thing is that I believe Uhtred remained in denial even after Alfred died, because yes he was with his God, but there was a part of Alfred that still lived: his dream.

From Alfred's death onwards, Uhtred works both directly and indirectly for the dream of an England, indeed he actually proves his loyalty to that man more after he died than when he was alive, and that has a lot to do with the fact that it was the last connection he had with him, as in a way it was also for Aelswith if you think about it, but also there was the aspect that, before dying, Alfred entrusted it in his hands and, since Uhtred spent the whole of S3 considering himself a traitor and blaming himself for it, if that man shows you one last trust, a trust you have yearned for your whole life, even more with the thing you know is most precious to him, what do you do? You are willing to do anything you can to make sure that that dream happens, to make sure that you can prove your loyalty, to show that you can keep one last oath to him and make it up for the one you broke.

That is painfully obvious in the film.

In the film Uhtred has made Northumbria an unified place, and it is actually the first time the whole of it is under one single king (even if Uhtred doesn’t call himself that), which was what Alfred has wanted all along, because he knew that the main problem would have been that particular kingdom, so with this action Uhtred has paved the way for the upcoming unification of England.

In 3x09 Alfred told him that his last act as king was to make sure that good men held power and that's one of the main things Uhtred was doing. Uhtred has known Alfred for 28 years of his life, he spent countless times with him, so he knew what Alfred would have wanted and every single decision he took in the film was so obviously made with the thought in mind of Alfred's wishes, and indeed Uhtred held the reins until he knew there was someone fitting to rule, a good man, just as his king would have wanted.

One of the most beautiful things to me is that Uhtred was lord of Bebbanburg at the time, so lord of the fortress he has waited his whole life to get back to, and yet he was mostly and more concerned about Alfred’s dream dying rather than the survival of that. Uhtred was also in a situation where he didn’t want to fight anymore, he didn’t even particularly believed he was still a warrior, and yet as soon as that dream was threatened, he didn’t hesitate once. That man was even forbidden to take part of the battle, since it would have been too dangerous for him, but he didn’t trust anyone else to protect Alfred’s dream and thus Uhtred went and died for it.

That man would have never died if he listened to Aethelstan's commands, but he defied them to not betray the little trust Alfred put in him right before he passed.

When he went back to Bebbanburg he didn’t even allow himself to die until he knew that there was an England out there and that Alfred’s lineage was on the throne of it, and during that scene he says that all he wanted was to be honoured in valhalla for “standing by an oath”, which yes can be interpreted as the oath of protecting Aethelstan, but remember that in S3, in Uhtred's mind, he did the most terrible thing of them all by breaking his oath to Alfred. Making England happen was the only way he could have forgiven himself for it, absolutely striking is the moment when the dream is fulfilled and you can how Uhtred is on the verge of tears and I think that has to do with two main reasons: first, he knew that with that Alfred would have finally known and understood how he could have never have betrayed him, and second, Alfred’s work was finished and there was nothing that kept him alive in his mind anymore.

Uhtred died soon after that so, in my mind, he totally met Alfred again at some point. In the show, for Thyra who was in a situation where she still believed in valhalla but was actually a christian, it was accepted the view of being in both places, therefore it is most likely the same for Uhtred, you know, a whole concept of peace rather than an actual place.

Dying for England is the most obvious declaration of love from Uhtred’s part, but if we want to point out actual words, Uhtred in 3x10 says that Alfred was “a man I loved and despised”, and he even calls him “my king”, which is something Uhtred will never do again for anyone. For the other kings he always just refers to them as “our”, therefore he speaks for his people and not for himself, but for Alfred? Oh, that’s a “my”.

For Alfred the thing was different because the man was a christian with so much guilt inside, it would have been way more difficult for him to say out loud that he loved Uhtred.

I do believe though that he did say it in subtext when he told him that “I should have closed my eyes and rattled at Heaven’s gate some time ago, it was the hope of this meeting that has kept me alive”, which is a lot, considering that the man was suffering like hell because of his illness, and yet he held onto life just for the purpose of seeing Uhtred one last time. It is also very interesting that on his deathbed he asked Uhtred “are you here or is it my sickness?”, because it hints at the possibility of Alfred having hallucinatione of Uhtred in the past when he was ill and WHY WOULD YOU EVER SEE SOME MAN WHEN YOU FEEL UNWELL? AND ESPECIALLY WHY ARE YOU NOT EVEN SURPRISED THAT YOUR MIND COULD HAVE CONJURED UHTRED COMING TO YOUR CHAMBERS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT? There’s only one answer to that:

You are gay for that man and you are in love with him.

They both were.

So anon, the answer to your question is: Yes, I do believe that they had feelings for each other.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk!

#if anyone seriously read all of this know that you have my most devoted love #i first focused on alfred and then on uhtred #there's a double space when i switch to uhtred's part #so many other things would be interesting to point honestly #like for example the way from the books you know that uhtred doesn't want to be called king because of alfred #but it was too long already #hopefully some of this makes sense #thank you for asking and sorry once again for taking such a long time!!#the last kingdom #alfred x uhtred #tlk alfred #uhtred #seven kings must die #god even in the tags i have made a typo #forgot to add 'out' to point so it is supposed to be 'point out'#it's 2am okay #asks

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mlchaelwheeler · 2 years

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The party's dnd games as foreshadowing for S5

After seeing this post by @bylertruther yesterday, I started theorizing about possible scenarios for the end battle of S5 and how the party's dnd games throughout the seasons foreshadow what might happen.

The very first scene we see of the party in S1 is a dnd game, in which Will rolls a 7, and his character is attacked by the demogorgan. It’s quite clear throughout S1 that this move foreshadows exactly what happened to Will when he got taken to the Upside Down later that same night-- he even tells Mike right before this happens: “the demogorgan, it got me.” We’ve all been over this fact a million times and we all know how blatant the foreshadowing is, but this is important setup for the rest of this analysis, so just keep this scene in mind.

After Will gets saved and as Christmastime approaches, the party gets together for another dnd game. Mike has spent lots of time planning it, and wants it to be perfect because it’s supposedly Will’s first time playing dnd again since being in the Upside Down and being hunted by the demogorgan. The game ends in victory, with Will rolling a 14 and defeating the new enemy Mike has cooked up: the thessalhydra.

Here's where things get interesting. Even though Will defeats the thessalhydra, the party isn't happy with the outcome of the game. They question Mike about plot holes and loose threads that never got addressed (which led to lots of plot theorizing pre-S2, but even after S2 a lot of this didn't make sense-- but that's because it was meant as foreshadowing for even later). The questions asked didn't make sense back then, but they could make sense in the context of S5.

The "lost knight"? Mike is the paladin of the party: a knight in shining armor who bravely protects his friends to the death. Could this be foreshadowing to Mike becoming trapped (or lost) in the Upside Down in S5? Or is this perhaps a reference to Mike being "lost" in regards to his feelings towards Will and El and how to accept deep truths about himself?

The "proud princess"? I originally couldn't come up with anything for this one, but @bylertruther brought up the fact that Max is going to be a damsel in distress of sorts in S5, while waiting for her friends to save her from Vecna's clutches. She also has the princess imagery going while stuck in her coma-- think of Sleeping Beauty or Snow White. True love will be what saves her in the end, either romantic (Lucas) or platonic (El).

The "weird flowers in the cave"? It's pretty self-explanatory that the demogorgan's/demodog's faces are flower-shaped. As for the caves, the Upside Down as a whole has tons of cave/rocky imagery, what with the tunnels, the cliff Henry climbs after first seeing the mindflayer, and the stalactite-looking spires in the mindscape. I'm guessing that this points towards the final battle taking place not in Hawkins, but in the actual Upside Down for a change.

Let's talk about the thessalhydra itself for a second though. Because where have we seen something similar before? That's right: the three-headed dragon in Will's painting for Mike. Yes, they're not identical monsters, but there are similarities here. Will's art has been foreshadowing before (see: the entire plot of S2), so is it that much of a reach that the painting could be foreshadowing to the threat posed to the party in S5?

It's clear that there will be a monster of some sort in S5-- a monster worse than a demogorgan. In 4x08, Vecna shows Nancy the past (his past) and the future. He shows her a monster, her whole family dead, and four gates opened. This was before Max was captured and put into a coma, so Vecna was showing Nancy the true future here. Could Will have seen this same future through his connection to Vecna and subconsciously added it to his painting?

In S2, Will's connection with the mindflayer (or Vecna, as we now know) allowed him to see what the mindflayer was seeing. His "now-memories" allowed him to see somewhat into the future. Will was able to predict Hopper being in danger based on what he dreamt the night Hopper entered the tunnels. He was even able to pinpoint the exact location of Hopper's car-- just from the now-memories alone! It's completely feasible that Will would be able to also see things Vecna is seeing in S4/5.

Furthermore, Will acquired true sight from his time in the Upside Down (or possibly related to latent powers?). This is important because true sight means he can see the reality of what's occurring in the ethereal plane. He's not seeing visions of what might happen, he's seeing the truth. This is different from Vecna's visions, where he causes people to see their worst fears and trauma they haven't dealt with-- truth as a basis, but exacerbated by lies and illusions. Will is seeing the reality of the Upside Down, which can probably extend to Vecna'd mindscape as well, giving him a way to see Vecna's thoughts and what could happen in the future.

Mike said it himself in S2: Will is a super spy. Sure, the mindflayer was spying through him for a time, but Will was spying right back. Since this connection is still as strong as ever, I'm willing to bet Will may need to take on the "spy" role again in S5. Will can already feel what Vecna is feeling, and see what Vecna's seeing. I'm sure he's also privy to Vecna's motivations and tactics for choosing his victims, so this could be very valuable in the fight against Vecna in S5. If Will can sense who will be targeted and how, it could protect his friends and family from ending up like Max (for now).

So how does Will's true sight and connection to Vecna connect to the dnd games, the thessalhydra, and his painting? The second-last and final rolls are always very important in foreshadowing what will happen later in the season, and with the "every ending has a beginning" tagline for S4, it's important to first look at S1. During their dnd game, Will's role of a 7 got him taken to the Upside Down. But in the next game, he rolled a 14 and defeated the thessalhydra. I think this is pretty clear foreshadowing to the fact that Will is going to be the one to defeat Vecna/the mindflayer for good.

El's already had her chance, and did her part in S4. Yes, she got out of Vecna's clutches and hit him with her powers, but she still wasn't able to save Max. I'm guessing El's arc will be geared more towards saving Max in S5, rather that directly confronting Vecna again. She's already done that, so it would be somewhat of a waste to just do a repeat of their battle.

What would be a better alternative? Will being the one to face down (and destroy Vecna). It's Will who Vecna has been targeting since S1, Will who shares the same similarities to Henry growing up, and Will who has the seemingly unbreakable connection to the mindflayer after all these years. Remember, back in S2, the mindflayer wanted to kill everyone except Will. Why? He obviously has a special connection to him that remains to be seen until the big reveal in S5.

Whatever happens with Vecna though, I think Will's painting is clear foreshadowing that the party will be facing down a threat from the Upside Down. The Duffers said that the characters will be back in their original S1 groups in S5, and Will is going to be the main focus, so having the party together as a whole (the original four boys, since El will likely be off saving Max) would be the perfect culmination of this.

If we look at their dnd characters, Mike as the paladin is front and center, leading the attack. It's also important to note that it's his shield which has the heart on it, pointing to the fact that it's Will's love that will ultimately protect Mike. Perhaps since Will is a cleric (and has healing powers), he will have to heal Mike from a bad injury suffered during the battle.

In the dnd game in 4x01, Dustin first rolled an 11 (a miss), which failed in defeating Vecna-- clearly foreshadowing the fact that El wouldn't be able to defeat Vecna on her own. That fact was backed up by how the "final" battle went down in 4x09, when El stopped Vecna briefly (in order to somewhat save Max), but ultimately didn't defeat him-- he managed to escape, and will likely gather his strength to become stronger than ever for the next confrontation in S5.

A 20 was rolled later (by Erica), which was the final blow that defeated Vecna. It's important to note that Erica was the underdog of Hellfire-- the one who was somewhat overlooked because she wasn't originally from the club. This same concept can be applied to Will (even though he is an original member of the party): he is an underdog in the sense that he hasn't showed obvious signs of manifesting powers yet, plus, he was overlooked and forgotten by all his friends (and family) in S3/4.

It's very likely, given all this foreshadowing, that Will is going to be the lucky break that the party needs in order to defeat Vecna once and for all. Will feels different, but Mike makes him feel like it's ok to be different. Similarly, Mike feels like he has to be needed in order to be worth something, but little does he know Will needs him in the exact way he's hoping for.

Mike's love makes Will stronger, and Will's love protects Mike. Together, they have the strength and ability to defeat Vecna. It may be a cliché, but love does overpower hate and evil. Once Mike and Will realize the love they have for each other is true and pure, they'll be unstoppable in the fight against Vecna, mainly because they won't be able to befall any of his tactics of manipulation. Vecna can't hurt those who are at peace with their inner turmoil and are at the happiest moment in their life. Together, Mike and Will are a force to be reckoned with. Vecna should be scared. El's powers, he understood because he has observed them and manifested similar ones. Whatever Will has hiding away though, Vecna won't see coming, which will be the way to end him once and for all.

#thanks for reading if you actually made it to the end!! hopefully it made sense 🤪🤪#denise i hope this lived up to your expectations after you had to put up with me screaming at you in the dms all day yesterday <33 #byler #stranger things analysis #stranger things theory #s5 theory #sarah.txt

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astarionposting · 4 months

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hi :) could you may give some advice on how to make *the tav* you're absolutely in love with? I've seen a few people have a certain tav they love so much and others even connect them with their tavs. I'm struggling a lot rn, creating so many tavs but always end up not liking or "connecting" with them enough. Does this sound silly?

Hello!!

No that doesn’t sound silly at all. I understand what you mean.

I think it is different for everyone. For me, I connect the most with the oc that I make the most like myself haha. I am someone who loves to daydream and imagine myself in different lives and universes because I find my own life quite boring, so that is usually what I will base my Tav/Durge on, but also make changes that I would like to see in my character and I will take things from other characters in different media that I really relate to/like.

So I guess I like to blend myself, my desired self and then traits/things from other characters in media I like to create the character I will connect with the most. When I make a character too different from myself, I guess I lose interest? Lol, as self absorbed as that sounds 😭

However, not everyone is like this and may not like to do this with their oc! So, you can try other ways, like taking inspiration from characters you really like and applying it to your Tav with your own changes, then maybe you’ll start to feel more invested/connected to your Tav :)

#༊*·˚ my asks #hopefully this all made sense 😭 it was kind of hard to describe

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cosmo-clown · 7 months

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okay maybe i overestimated my ability to write the dust lore in one weekend i may take a bit longer BUT I’MM I’LL TRY I JUST HAVE LIKE BORING SCHOOL STUFF TO GET THROUGH AND DRAWING IS A LOT EASIER

heres some traditional sketchy stuff though: i think omori fits dust very well,,, mari and papyrus shaking hands in the afterlife because they are not vengeful spirits their brothers just turned them into ones.

oh also editing because i was looking back at all the sketches and this blue looks so cute for WHAT!!! i think he vibes with all the persona songs he is such a phantom thief.. whip kirby slapped /j

#utmv #au #au sans #dust sans #dusttale #murder sans #phantom papyrus #blueberry sans #blueberry #underswap #omori #mari mentions idk #I HAD AN AU OF THEM BUT ITS OLD ART #maybe i’ll remake it and show it off idk though it wasnt super fleshed out or made too much sense anyway #hopefully this didnt spoil omori for anyone i will cry forever if so #idk how to censor info this isnt discord 💀#my art #ggotta go back and tag all my art as mine i keep forgetting HELP

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