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#how do you make sense of the wreckage
soldier-poet-king · 2 years
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Everytime I think the saga of highschool friend drama weddings is over ...
How can it not already be over
Ex highschool bff got married again??? Or rather, I think they had a small church wedding right at the beginning of COVID for legal and religious reasons, but had ig a renewal ceremony today and the actual wedding reception with a billion guests and all the dresses etc etc etc
Ofc I did not know about it until I opened instagram and saw it plastered everywhere
And ofc all my horrible terrible feelings that I ignore 99% of the time resurfaced and I'm drowning, and I can't even just wine and game to decompress BC I have COVID and booze is off limits and it's just ....
I'm really going to just have to live with having fucked up my whole life for the rest of my life? But always being unsure if it was really my fault? No real closure, just guilt and regret.
Fight down the pang of jealousy that my friend married a man I introduced her to and is now tight knit friends with the friend group I brought her into, it's all the same, I'm just no longer there
Do they miss me? Do they think of me? On days like today, big occasions we'd dream and giggle about as teens, is there even a passing memory of me? Or was I not worth even that much?
I am not so old that this is distant past, no matter how I lie to myself, say I am okay most days, convince myself that what ifs are useless and i needed to leave the city to survive, no matter that I ended up stuck back here anyway
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stubz · 4 months
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Injuries and a ship invasion, no one dies
"Why do they let humans take care of our younglings? If it hadn't been for the coalition then it would've been another century till they realize our existence. Their senses have dulled to the point where its laughable that they are the dominating species of their planet. And lets not forget the fact that they're at constant war with each other over the most stupidest things, color of skin, where one lives, who they love, what they believe, etc."
"Calis stop it! Your being a xenophobe. And while some of that is true you should know by now that the humans care deeply for our children."
"I am simply being concerned parent who worries for their young's safety and well-being...we are in a dangerous area right now, the middle of a war zone, and it would make me feel safer if we had some others at the care centre till reinforcements arrive."
"Trust me my brightest, the humans will do everything they can to ensure the safety of our Dali...and knowing them they'll likely surprise you and live up to their reputation."
"...fine, fine, I apologize, you are right. The humans have surprised me so far, what's one more?"
.
..
...
....
"WHERE IS DALI?! WHERE IS MY YOUNGLING CAPTAIN!"
"Calis calm down! Your arm!"
"NO! YOU DON'T GET TO TELL ME TO CALM DOWN WHEN ENEMY FORCES HAVE INVADED OUR SHIP AND NONE OF US CAN FIND OUR YOUNG!!"
"Calis, your hurt and so is your partner. Think of Gala, they need you right now."
"...Gala is hurt because they were looking for Dali. They got shot because they were heading to the centre...I have to find Dali. For Gala, Captain."
"I'm sure that Kim and Max are doing everything they can to keep them safe."
"With all do respect Captain, how could 2 unarmed humans survive what our force couldn't."
"...I don't know but its probably going to be one hell of a story we'll be telling for the ages. Now go get your arm treated. That's an order."
.
..
...
....
"WE FOUND THEM!"
"CAPTAIN WE FOUND THE YOUNGLINGS!"
"WE NEED A CRANK AND SEND EVERY AVAILABLE MEDIC!"
"oh great stars please no...nonononono DALI!" the Delzah rushed forward, breaking through the search party, only to be stopped by their captain.
"Calis...you have to let them do their job. We, we just have to hope." he could not help the hitch in his breath. Hoping, praying, that his own child was okay underneath the wreckage that was once the youngling care centre.
They fight and thrash until eventually grief overtakes them. They collapse into the captain's arms wailing.
"...what hope do I have that my child is alive under all that rubble. Captain...the only hope I have is that they died quick and that they are with the stars now..."
"Oh Calis..." he sobs. He knows it. There was hardly a chance that anyone was still alive underneath there. Only the strongest younglings who were from a strong species may survive and his child was not one of those few. They were strong but his child was like him...a runt, the joke of the family. Too small, too weak, too soft. She was surely dead...why couldn't it have been him?
"MAPA!"
"PAPA!"
One by one, children emerge from an opening made in the rubble, and at the front of them was Dali and a small feline like child.
"my glorious star" flinging themself from the Captain Calis dragged themself to meet Dali who leaped into their Mapa's arms.
The captain was not too far behind, running to his daughter and cradling her close. Words were not exchanged but Calis could feel the vibrations coming from their purrs.
"See...I told you they would be waiting..."
last to emerge from the rubble was the humans, carried out on stretchers. Only one was conscious. Glass glittered from their skin, dirt and dust blended with vibrant red blood, staining their white bandages, and a rebar was poking out of the unconscious one's side.
"You...got everyone right?"
"Yes, human Max."
"Good...that's good..." and finally did they lose consciousness.
.
..
...
....
"Apparently they covered the windows and hid the kids in the storage room, putting them to the farthest corner while they formed a human wall in front of the door.
When those quiznaking bastards couldn't break down the door they rigged the centre with explosives. Lucky for us the humans personally requested that the storage room be made durable for the equivalent of their disasters on earth so it held up decently well."
"But how did they get so injured?"
"Decently well, meaning the room wasn't completely stable. Eventually the walls started to give and the humans had to improvise by becoming the new pillars. They took shifts until they both had to hold up the weight for what the kids guess to be 3 hours...imagine holding up all of that weight until you were on your hands and knees with rebars, broken glass, and debris piercing into your body."
"...Gala said that Human Max nearly flatlined and Human Kim needed 2 liters of blood."
"You seem confused."
"...Humans are impressive but how did they do all of that? They were already injured and yet managed to hold up a collapsed ceiling for hours until help arrived, I thought they were completely average and even weaker than us."
"Apparently when their loved ones, especially children, are in danger they tap into their more primal instincts. Allowing them to withstand a shot to the side, a slab of concrete to the head, and hours of keeping a ceiling from collapsing until they know everyone is safe.
Heard a story of a human who died only after he saw his kids was safe from a fire."
"Looks like Gala was right. Humans have surprised me once again."
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littlestpersimmon · 29 days
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When ppl talk about the "banality of evil" its often about how boring the system that upholds imperialism is, but it's also how evil is commonplace, an ingredient to the cement that builds the foundation of the imperial core. You read about what the IOF is doing to Palestinians and yet fail to realize that American soldiers were doing the same things in the Philippines in 1902 during the american occupation, which is still not recognized as a genocide to this day. You think about Congo today but don't realize that a hundred years ago within the same land, the king of Belgium would cut off the hands of natives if they didn't collect and extract enough rubber, and its not much different when you replace"rubber" with "cobalt", "Belgian king" with "American oligarch".. and the world immediately, utterly feels godless. One war seamlessly transitioning into another. How can there be so much grief for something as ordinary as a component to something I am literally holding in my hands right now. How can you make sense of that.
In the Philippines, there is a legend that says that the sturdiest, strongest buildings are constructed using the blood of a thousand children. The most prominent structure to remember this legend by, was a bridge called "Tulay ng San Juanico", built by none other than Philippine Dictator Ferdinand Marcos, who is renowned to this day by his record of unfathomable human rights abuse. San Juanico Bridge stands, used for commute in the daily lives of filipino civilians under the shadow of the empire, in an all consuming, impenetrable and unbearable mundanity. You can find 20, 45, a hundred, a million people who are kind, but at the same time I think about how so many of these kind people walk this earth without thought or personal responsibility, completely and totally unwilling to lose an iota of comfort and convenience, without once stopping to think, what do they owe the next coming generation, the ones that are still here, and the ones nameless and buried in this world's wreckage, in the necessity of its evil.
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ax-killjoy · 1 year
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☆ Because, you’re kind.
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Note ! 𖦹 : this is based on a D&D tiktok i saw. :,) i hope this fic makes sense- if not then it becomes part of my sleep deprived nonsense.
Jake Sully/Gn!Reader (Platonic !)
tw !!: child neglect
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Y/N was a child birthed from two horribly neglectful parents. Jake Sully remembers vividly, the way your body was born into the light, a gift from Eywa. And the look of your mother’s disgust written on her face, and the distant look from your father.
Jake couldn’t tell whether the heat rising from his throat was bile, or the anger he felt.
I guess Na’vi can be shitty parents too.
He tried giving your parents a chance, seeing that maybe they were just simply fatigued. But that wasn’t the case, he watched over you closely as you grew up. Neytiri could tell something was up with Jake, whenever your parents came to help with operations.
Jake was stiff, his teeth gritting, his jaw clenched and furrowed brows. “you should be looking after your kid.” he seethes, glaring at the parents who were gathering guns. They were chanting loudly, loading guns into saddles as they cheered, killing sky people around the wreckage. “Why ? That child is no gift from Eywa, a mistake maybe. but no gift.” The father says, and Neytiri ears flatten. A crack in her heart, like glass. Jake Sully suddenly stops what he is doing, “You will love your child, you should. Your child, EVERY child is a gift from Eywa.” he says, before storming off to find more guns.
After that, both Neytiri and Jake swore to look after you. To watch you closely, to treat you like one of their own. Until you officially became one of their own.
When you turned 13, you don’t remember it. And Jake thanks Eywa for that, but both of your parents seemingly forgot about you. Or maybe it was intentional.
It was your first hunting trip, you had been begging your parents to take you hunting. They took you to the forest, to the deepest parts of forbidden to unmarked territory, Telling you that all the good animals to eat were here. Your father and mother say that they will watch from afar, and before you knew it. They had left you there, in part of the forest unmarked on a map.
It took a week for Jake and Neytiri to find you, you hid yourself in the nook of the tree. You slept soundly, and the seeds of Eywa surrounded you like an unspoken hug, as if Eywa was reassuring you. Jake’s eyes became glossy, he kneeled down over your body, and he cried. His body shivered and small sobs were let out, god he was so scared. He was so fucking scared you died.
That was when you became an official Sully.
.。.:*☆♡*.+
As you grew up, you forgot about your parents. Or that’s what everyone saw, you were bubbly now. Nature loving, Curious, full of life. A personality that was never shown when your parents took care of you.
The Sully family cherished you dearly, quickly becoming one of the eldest of the Sully children. Jake and Neytiri were everything your parents weren’t.
Your parents were quickly exiled from Omatikaya, It felt like the sun got brighter, the stars twinkled more, and the breeze welcomed Jake when they left. Relief washed over him.
It was a quiet day, you had come back from hunting with Neteyam. You and Neteyam had just finally turned 15, meaning you both could officially hunt without supervision. Neteyam went to explore with the rest of the family, whilst you and Jake stayed home. He watched as you prepared food, whilst he cleaned his weapons and reassembled them. Checking each bullet intently, putting the broken ones in a separate box. It was a comfortable silence, the warmth of breeze welcomed both of you.
“I know you’re not my real father.” You said simply, cutting the chunks of meat and putting it in a basket with various vegetables.
Jake stopped what he was doing, looking up but not looking at you.
“I know that Neytiri is not my mother.“ you say softly, like it was a secret. As if it was forbidden to say.
“how did you know ?” he asks, his voice is raspy yet ever so soft.
You look back at him, your eyes bright yet spoke a million words. you stopped cutting the meat, you walked to him and sat next to him. Letting your head rest on his shoulder, and you sigh.
“because you and Neytiri are kind.”
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sicklyseraphnsuch · 7 months
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The Duality of Simon (or the Importance of Marcy)
Travel back to the early 2010s, when Adventure Time was still a fairly new thing. The fandom was growing, the theories were flowing. We've had confirmation that Ooo is in fact a post appcalyptic world. And then we get:
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Here was living, breathing proof of the intersection between Ooo and our world. Simon Petrikov was a literal connection to the past, and moreover one of the ways Adventure Time really began to develop its inner tragedies.
But honestly, as sad as the Idea of Simon Petrikov was - it remained that he was a relic, an inert tragedy that was a connection to the past, but not necessarily connected to the future.
Enter:
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You can mourn the losses of ages past. But it won't necessarily move you to act. Because there's nothing to compel you. You can stand to gain something but it's more important that you don't lose anything by keeping the status quo. In short, there weren't any stakes.
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No, not those kind of Stakes... Well... maybe a little
So, bear in mind, Betty won't make her debut until two seasons after "Holly Jolly Secrets". To us, she was a non-entity. Simon's grief over her loss was for the audience, a mostly intellectual exercise. How sad for this poor cursed man to lose the woman he loved - replacing all proper nouns with common nouns because we didn't know Simon either. But his situation is clearly sad, just in a general, unspecific way. Because again, there's nothing at stake here.
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Marcy drives thoses stakes up (and into our hearts). Suddenly, Simon becomes Very Very Real because we know Marcy. We've hung out with her for at least five seasons now leading up to the game changing "I Remember You".
By connecting Marcy to this Simon, suddenly we had something to lose - suddenly we already lost something. Marcy gave Simon's curse weight - dimension - texture - rendering it very real instead of a mere intellectual tragedy. Simon matters because he matters to someone here and now, because someone was still crying over him. And we love Marcy. We don't want her to cry.
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It was through the Marcy and Simon relationship that we came to learn of and love Simon. Betty came later. Betty came after. We already loved Simon by then so learning of his love story was just building on that love. Naturally, being invested in the Simon and Betty relationship without prior connection to Simon is possible. But the fact that he was already established and endeared to the audience goes a way into investing in the Simon and Betty relationship.
So we get to Fionna and Cake.
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We get exactly one scene with the Marcy we know and love. And Simon isn't even in the same room as her.
And the show is fully justified in doing so because Fionna and Cake was a series about Simon and Betty. And Simon and Marcy have little to do with that A story (the love plotline). Even if the B story (the recovery plotline) does pay homage to Simon and Marcy by showing Simon that he does have value, the homage amounts to only a few scenes (maybe cumulatively three minutes of screen time) in the whole series.
However, Simon and Marcy's relationship wasn't just to show that Simon is an integral component to the way Ooo came to be, and his impact on the people he loves. Simon and Marcy's relationship is integral to how we came to love Simon - against all odds and all tenets of common sense, a man that was slowly warped by madness chose to take care of a completely unknown little girl that he found in the wreckage of the world.
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The problem here is that Marcy's Simon and Betty's Simon never got to meet in the middle. A lot of this is rooted in the original Adventure Time series where Betty and Marceline never speak more than ten words to each other.
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Literally the only time they share the screen (and no I'm not counting Betty bot in Broke his Crown)
Which is BANANAS considering they are literally the two most important people in Simon's life.
And listen, again, by Fionna and Cake, we are invested in Simon and Betty, especially after what she did during the finale. We want to know about them.
And again, the Fionna and Cake series is well and wholly complete without ever having Simon and Marcy talk.
But it leaves a little ache. Because again, the first opportunity to truly love and connect with Simon came through Simon and Marcy. And we never really know how they get on now that they're back together. We seriously have maybe 10 lines of conversation between them since the finale and this includes Obsidian.
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Literally, he says hi to Marcy twice and that's it. Very meaningful conversation.
Aaaand there's also the supreme irony where in one relationship, Simon never gets a chance to contribute equally, and in his other relationship, Simon wore himself down to nubs giving all that he had. But this duality within Simon is never really connected. There is a throughline here, his impulse for self sacrifice shares a root for his self centered perspective that blinded him to Betty's self effacing habits.
Now here's the thing, Fionna and Cake also built its conflict around Simon's identity and his self worth, etc. Yet it doesn't really contend with all that Simon has done without Betty, and before Ice King. By centering the narrative on only how he was with Betty (both pre and post Mushroom War), we get very little foundation laid out for what he could do after he says goodbye to her.
And this isn't a mistake because again, the series stands on its own just fine. The story works without it because at least that central relationship of Simon and Betty is fully established. But it does come at the cost of a missed opportunity to fully explore the cause of Simon's myopia, or how living through an apocalypse could reinforce that myopia because Simon keeps romanticizing "when his life was great".
Finally, the other downside is that Fionna and Cake stands on its own, maybe a little too much. It's still based on the characters of Adventure Time, building on the love for the original show. So it would have been a crowd pleaser, shall we say some fan service, to get more of what the original show worked hard to make us love.
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mystery-salad · 2 months
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The world is safe now.
You tell yourself that as Zhaitan clings to a tower of decay, crumbling beneath its claws as the canons aim true. The shots hit, cheers raise as the dragon topples down. Falling from view through the miasma it created below. No one can hear it hit the ground over the relieved shouts of victory ringing across the airships. But everyone feels it in a resounding rumble that shouldn't have carried through the air like that. The celebrating falters, confusion rising but not fast enough to prepare for what follows. The shockwave hits like nothing you've ever felt. Everything goes dark as the screams begin.
The world is safe now, Orr is not.
You wake up in the rubble as survivors try to make sense of what happened. The dragon is dead, but no one accounted for where all the consumed magic had to go. No one planned for this despite generations of preparation. Perhaps there's a reason for the dragons, you hear murmurs through the tents. But you didn't come this far to call it quits, and one land riddled with a decaying radiation can't stop the mission. The contamination in your blood won't stop you.
The world is safe now. Orr is gone.
Mordremoth stares you down from within his mind. You're like a weed that won't die, small and foreign but resilient and ready to take everything. The odds are against you with the team sent away, you can't face the gaze of the dead like last time. They're safe at a distance, you have to hope they got far enough as you defy the odds and strike another dragon down.
The world is safe, but there's a catch.
Trahearne shudders as your mind returns to your body, as you look around in wonder that there isn't a shockwave like last time. He's so calm as he explains the truth of it, defying how terrified he is of dying, of asking a friend to do this and stand at ground zero once again. But you stand just as calm, picking up the blade and telling him to close his eyes. You hope he'll rest well, wherever his life takes him next. As the blade cuts through, you know it's real as the shockwave begins just like last time. You brace for impact as much as you can.
The world is safe now. The desert is gone.
It's almost tempting to let Balthazar handle the rest, let the god walk a path of destruction to each dragon, sparing yourself further damage. But his path leaves so much unnecessary devastation...so here you are alone with another dragon. Well, not completely alone now. You have Aurene, though you're still not sure if that's truly a blessing any more. The two of you corner Kralkatorrik, the perfect trap laid deep underground in old sunspear ruins.
The world is safe now, until the dragon takes a last stand.
Waking up in wreckage is becoming normal to you. When did that happen, when did the panic vanish? No time to think on it as new plans have to be laid out. You chase him down, you and your dragon, to kill her grandfather and save the world again. Setbacks are numerous. It's harder to work alone on this one, so many soldiers are ready to see it to the end with you. You tell them they don't know what they're asking for and send them away again. Aurene, still a child, fights the dragon's minions nearly overwhelmed as you get to his heart and strike. You've never seen the explosion from inside before. It's so bright.
The world is safe now. The island is gone.
Is it worth it all? It has to be, you tell yourself, as people celebrate your victories in a shrinking world. Refugees who have fled the fallout zones don't seem to agree, but at least they're alive right? And you know you're almost done. Jormag and Primordus, opposites and twins, rise together and somehow feel like childsplay after the last one. Perhaps it's because aurene is an equal to them now. You don't dare to think of the devastation that would be left if she were to die now. Thankfully you don't have to as the siblings tear each other apart.
The world is safe now. The mountains are gone.
No one has seen the final dragon in ages, hidden away deep underwater until you stumble into the truth while chasing a lesser threat. Soo Won was so gentle once, but the void ravages all. It feasts on the magic you released so willingly into the world, your devastations have paved the way for this chaos.
The world is safe now, for the void to reform.
You've survived so much despite the odds, held together by the very magic degrading your bones and poisoning your blood. The void pulls at those strings as it taunts you through the voice of the dragon who started it all. It's the hardest fight you've ever faced. As Aurene pumps you full of power to survive, you wonder if your death would bring destruction too in this moment. But it's left a mystery as Soo Won falls and the void fades. There's a moment of peacefulness you've never felt before, the grandmother hanging on long enough to comfort her granddaughter. But she can't prevent the state of her death. The jade sea shatters beneath your feet as she dies.
The world is safe now. But how much of it is left?
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elix8r · 6 months
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Rare and Pure (cbg) - Teaser
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FULL FIC HERE
PAIRING: choi beomgyu x fem!reader
GENRES: smut, angst, werewolf au, childhood friends to lovers, neighbors to lovers, accidental lovers?
TEASER WC: 0.35k idk how long this is going to be i'm already at 7k and have not gotten to the meat of anything :):):):):)
SUMMARY: Choi Yeonjun was the love of your life, the one you were unequivocally sure the Moon Goddess had chosen for you. His younger brother, Beomgyu, on the other hand, didn't even register on your radar as mate material. But fate, as it often does, had other plans. One night was all it took for your entire life to flip around as you found yourself accidentally mated to your childhood friend. Now, you're left grappling with the emotional wreckage of it all as you are not only struggling to feel the unbreakable connection that mates are supposed to share with Beomgyu, but you're also dealing with the harsh reality that your dreams of forever with Yeonjun will never come to fruition. It's a bitter pill to swallow, and it's forcing you to reevaluate your very sense of self.
Your wolf clearly had some serious explaining to do.
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"Fuck! What the hell did we just do?" you screamed at him, hastily pulling up your pants and bolting out of the stall. Beomgyu followed, his words stuttering in his panic. "I-I don't know, shit!"
You dashed to the mirror, inspecting your neck, and what you saw made your heart sink. The bite was deep, and you could make out every detail of his teeth. A trickle of blood ran down your shoulder, and you winced in pain as you carefully traced the mark. Turning around, you pulled his shirt to the side to examine his neck, finding an almost identical bite mark, mirroring your own. There was no denying that the two of you had permanently claimed each other.
Panic was overwhelming, and the alcohol only added to the haze that clouded your thoughts. You rushed out of the bathroom with Beomgyu hot on your heels, shouting your name as you weaved your way through the growing mass of dancing bodies, which seemed to have multiplied in the last hour.
Your desperate attempt to reach the front door came to an abrupt halt when you accidentally collided with the last thing you needed to see tonight. Before you could turn and find another route, you found yourself facing the one scene that would shatter your already fragile state.
Yeonjun and Yunjin were passionately entwined on the dance floor, their lips locked in a heated kiss. Before you could react, they both noticed your distressed presence. "Y/N?" Yunjin called out.
Overwhelmed by the whirlwind of emotions and events, you couldn't fully deduce on how to react, and you felt your eyes burning as tears blurred your vision. Beomgyu had finally caught up to you, but his arrival only served to intensify the situation. Yeonjun, with his keen senses, quickly picked up on the extremely potent mix of your and Beomgyu's scents that wafted in the air, which were a telltale sign of what the two of you had been up to. His eyes zeroed in on the glaringly obvious marks adorning your bodies, and it didn't take long for all hell to break loose.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE: ya'll know i love a good one night stand to lovers and making it werewolf au phew i'm so down for this plot lmao but honestly i'm so excited to finally have something for you guys it's literally been ages i'm so sorry ㅠㅠ and while i def do not know when it's going to be released i have enough to know that it'll hopefully be soon?? i'm about 7k in rn and have a good bit to write but it's going well so i'm so excited !! also beomgyu's the best i love that mans sm
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lokisprettygirl · 1 month
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Utopia (Modern! Daemon Targaryen x female reader) (Non Canon AU) (18+)
Read chapter 6 here // Series Masterlist
Chapter 7
Summary: Daemon eases your fears and worries.
Warning: 18+ sex ,period sex (if it bothers you skip the scene) death and destruction that comes from a ship wreckage, smut, sex, menstrual sex, unprotected sex. Some inconsistency with ship sinking, i researched as much as I could
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“Are you alright?” Emma's voice was filled with concern as she asked you if you were okay, noticing the distress that was evident on your face. The two of you had just left Lily's house, and Emma could sense the negative effect it had on you.
“I'm fine..just want to go home” Emma sighed as you said that. She could tell that you were not alright, but she didn't know how to help without you opening up to her.
“Y/n I know you have always liked him but him and Lily have always been this way..they fight, fuck other people and then get back to each other.. don't you remember how he treated you on the ship after he slept with you?” you turned your head to look at her as she said that. Emma's words had struck a chord in your heart, reminding you of the awful morning when Daemon had completely dismissed you post the one night stand .
“Yeah? Always huh? How many times have they survived a ship sinking incident before? How many times before Daemon was left stranded on an island with someone else? This is not the same thing..why it's so hard for you guys to understand” you got visibly agitated as you finished your sentence, your voice raised as you tried to express that you and Daemon weren't just a fling.
“I'm just trying to protect you..” she mumbled softly so you sighed.
“I know but I also know what I'm doing..do you have any idea what I have been through with Daemon on that Island? You can't just get over that stuff and move on with your life as if nothing happened. He …he knows me..I know him..six months ..we were .. everything to each other” your eyes teared up and you hated how weak you felt in the moment. You always felt this way whenever Daemon was in the picture.
“But he's not on that Island anymore and neither are you..he's back here in the actual world where Lily is”
You didn't say anything as she said that. After what Lily had said about him fucking her last night and seeing things from Emma's perspective you felt hurt and worried. You asked him clearly if he had fucked her and he said no, did he lie to you? Why would he lie to you and hurt you like that?
“Do you want me to find a job for you? Dalton was asking about you” she said as she pulled the car in your driveway so you took your seat belt off, you just wanted to go home and cry.
“Not right now, last time you hooked me up with a job ..things didn't work out so well”
You heard the literal gasp she let out as you jabbed at her. That was mean and uncalled for but anger was bubbling inside you at the moment and Daemon wasn't there to take it.
You entered your bedroom, exhausted from the emotional upheaval. As you collapsed onto your bed, you noticed a missed call and a few text messages from Daemon on your phone. Taking a deep breath, you picked up your phone and opened the message.
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You didn't want to ignore him and you certainly didn't want to hurt him by making assumptions about him, he told you something and you wanted to believe him but insecurities from the past ran deep and this wouldn't be the first time a man would cheat your trust like this. Instead of wrestling with your thoughts you dialed his number instead,
“Am I being ignored?” He asked as soon as he picked up so you sighed.
“Why would you say that?”
“What did she say to you..love?” his tone of voice made it clear that he was genuinely concerned.
“Where are you?” you asked him nonchalantly, your voice didn't really hold any emotion at the moment.
“I'm with my lawyer, had to discuss uhhh.. some fortune related complexities..are you back at your place?” He enquired so you barely hummed in response “Can I come see you?”
“You don't have to ask me” he chuckled as you said that,
“I'm trying to be more civilized and less of a caveman”
“Don't you want to go see Lily?” you asked him with sarcasm and envy dripping from your tone.
“Not right now, I want her to move on.. darling.. whatever she said to you that's making you all squeaky and snappy at me .. I will fix it yeah? And then you're going to fix me” you couldn't help but bite on your lip as his words made you feel slightly bashful.
“Okay” you could hear him smiling on the other end of the line as you mumbled a short response again.
Half an hour later as you opened the door and saw Daemon standing there, with his arms behind his back and a mischievous smirk on his face, you felt your heart skip a beat. The peach ribbed shirt he was wearing just added to his charm, it made you want to snuggle against him. Despite your feelings for him, the idea of him breaking your trust and lying to you was breaking your heart in ways you couldn't even begin to imagine.
The only reason why you weren't crying yourself to sleep for the past two days was because of him, the past month when you both were avoiding each other was difficult to say the least. The nightmares about drowning in the ocean had become a frequent occurrence, leaving you feeling frightened and restless. The fact that he was the only thing preventing you from giving in to the emotional distress that had been haunting you was both a comfort and a burden. But he was the only one who truly understood you because he was there suffering with you.
“Flowers for the beautiful lady” he held one of his hands forward to present you with a bouquet of beautiful flowers so you grabbed it and took in their scent “Chocolates” he then brought his other hand forward so you grabbed the box and went into your room, acting like a petulant child, it didn't do anything to deter him, he actually found you adorable like this.
He was expecting a kiss and a hug but this morning when you had told him that you were tagging along with Emma to visit Lily, he was terrified, not because he had anything to hide from you but because he knew as a matter of fact that she'd try to fill your head against him to drive wedge between you both. He was well aware of her vindictive ways when she was scorned like this.
“We need to stop meeting like that at your door” he mumbled as he entered the bedroom door and you were already on the bed with your face down into the pillow.
You felt his lips trail up from your calves to your hamstrings and he spent a good minute on your ass cheeks before he kissed up from the small of your back very slowly. Shivers ran down your spine as he moved up and pulled your hair aside to kiss your nape. You turned around to look at him and your teary eyes rendered his heart, your delicate features always softened him.
“If it wasn't for us being stranded on that Island you'd never date me would you?” You asked him as you caressed his cheeks with your fingers, you always feared that your connection with him was rooted in the shared trauma of the island and would fizzle soon.
“Yeah that might be true but not because there's something wrong with you or that you're not insanely attractive but because I wouldn't really get to know you like this..so intimately in every possible way”
You felt his fingers brush lightly against your chest, resting right above your heart, and you couldn't help but feel the burst of emotions.
His hand then drifted under your skirt as he leaned down to kiss you lovingly, palms wrapped around your hips as he pulled you into him so you sighed and closed your eyes to feel him close.
“You used to visit Paradise with Emma ” your eyes snapped open as he mentioned that.
Paradise was the name of the club The Dragonriders played at frequently and you used to go there on weekends before you even took the job on Utopia. “I'd often watch you dance from afar..you never even looked at me back then you know.. didn't even notice me” he mumbled softly in your ears so you cupped his cheeks again.
“I didn't know you..you were just a stranger”
“Exactly darling.. sometimes you have to learn the person inside out to truly appreciate them. I know i was unfair and cruel to you after that night we had spent together but it was my immaturity speaking..now i know better” you sighed as he said that, your hands sneaked inside his shirt as he leaned into you for a kiss again. He was irresistible at all times but especially when he was on top of you like this.
“You look cute in your pretty little skirt baby, my brave girl ..now are you going to sulk some more or you'd tell me what it is she said to you that is messing with your head?” he asked you, his voice was still gentle but firmer this time. You didn't want to beat around the bush either.
“She told me that you made love to her last night after you dropped her off and then later on she went into detail about how magical it was for both of you”
He looked at you intensely for a moment before he chuckled slightly as if he had it coming..
Somehow that reaction eased your fear, it was Lily's words against the man you had faced the worst of life with. If he was going to tell you that he hadn't fucked her then you'd have to believe him.
You'd have to put your faith in him because he deserved that much from you..
“Do you know why I came so hard inside you last night?” he asked you softly as his thumb brushed over your lips before he kissed you again.
“Whyy?”
“Because it has been a full day since I had done that.. since I had felt you around me so intimately. I might be an uncivilized animal at times but I'd never hurt you like that. Especially not you ..not after everything we have been through together”
You cupped his cheeks and your fingers ran through his scalp as he said that, his words felt sincere and a part of you believed him wholly, something made you believe that Daemon would never hurt you like that no matter what.
“You're not an uncivilized animal…just my big burly Cavemon” a smile graced his features as you cooed at him.
“Believe me yeah?”
“Okay.. sorry”
“Shhh it's not your fault..”
“No I'm sorry she said that about you and i believed her because I'm afraid and insecure”
“We all are at times..i fixed the problem..now you fix me” you giggled as he tickled your stomach with his fingers.
“Stahp ..it's almost my second day now..there will be clumps and stuff coming out of my goodies” he looked at you intently as you said that, his eyes darkened with consumable lust.
“If you intended for that to disgust me..it's not working”
“Your kinks are kinky..have you always had this one?” you questioned as you lifted your head up to kiss his neck.
“Not until you..”
“But you fucked your ex on her cycle”
“Not for the kink”
“It's just strange for me…my ex was disgusted just by me mentioning my period clumps”
“What an imbecile huh?
You giggled as you wrapped your legs around his waist and he made you sit up along with him.
“We are doing this my way today” you mumbled as you took your crop top and skirt off, Daemon got off the bed and he quickly undressed himself with the speed of lighting, when he climbed back on the bed you removed your underwear and threw it on the floor,
“You won't mind if I bleed on you right?”
“Fuck darling …noo” he almost moaned at the picture you had painted for him, you climbed on his lap and sat yourself down on his cock slowly, inch by inch, he wasn't really an average man in length or girth so you needed to go slow for your own sake, his legs splayed out on the bed as you submerged him completely and he placed his hands around your hips as you moved in circles slowly. His head swayed backwards and moans spilled from his throat as you worked your hips back and forth.
“I noticed you..” you mumbled against his mouth as you kissed him so he opened his eyes and looked at you all perplexed. He looked cute like this, all fucked out and pleasured the way he deserved to be pleasured.
“Mmm?”
“In the club..i noticed you..but you always had your eyes on her”
“Darling, do you believe in fate?” his voice came out in whispers as the sensation grew in the pit of his stomach,
“Not really”
“I do”
“Why?”
“I just do..I think it was fate that brought us together. Why do you think we were accommodated right next to each other when all the people we knew were a deck below from us?”
“Duuh management”
“Was it management that left us stranded together on that Island?” his fingers dug into your hips as he helped you hop on top of him.
“No it was my stupidity”
“Mmm really? You want to tell me that those strong waves somehow managed to bring us together on that very same island where we collapsed not even six feet apart from each other because of you? And both of us miraculously lived through it while none of those other people survived?”
“I don't know what to say..you're romanticizing the tragedy” his fingers curled into your hair and he pulled you closer to kiss you before he spoke,
“I have earned the right to do so ..now be a good girl and fucking cum with me”
You kissed him hungrily and the rest of the rebuttals you had didn't really come out as you fell apart in his arms as soon as you felt his warm cum filling you up to the brim. He placed his head on your chest as you both recovered from the euphoria but it lasted a good while.
Your head felt fuzzy as you had never been fucked this good, sex had never been so satisfying before. It was as if your body connected to him on a much deeper level than just physical, sex with him transcended you and filled you with intense emotional and mental release.
“If you pull out right now I'd ruin my bed so take me to the shower alright?” He chuckled briefly before he dragged his shapely arse off the bed and took you to the bathroom. He turned the shower on and as soon as he pulled out, his cum mixed with your blood spilled out of your freshly fucked cunt. His cock was absolutely bloody as well and you heard him gasp as he glanced at it. His fingers immediately caressed your lips as he cleaned the mess between your legs so you fisted his cock and returned the favor.
“I missed one therapy session and I was a major bitch to Emma this morning” you mumbled as you came back to reality from the mind numbing orgasm you had experienced just now..
“What did you do?”
“You know how they keep telling us in therapy to not blame other people for what happened as it was nobody's fault?” He nodded as you said that while he rubbed the body wash between his palm and turned you around to scrub your back.
“I think I did just that and I feel awful”
“Mmmm then apologize sweetheart and talk it out…these things happen amongst friends. I called Cole this morning to wish him for the birthday and we had a chat, he understands me better now”
“It's his birthday today?”
“Yup and we are invited, I'm sure he'd text you about it”
You hummed as he said that, as you placed your head down on his chest he wrapped his arms around you while you two enjoyed the hot shower in the comfort of your bathroom. Sometimes when you closed your eyes you imagined yourself being back at the island with him but you were only thinking about the times that weren't so awful, like bathing with him in the sea and walking around the woods in search for fruits, and most of all sleeping all huddled together on the bed of leaves every night.
You missed that, you really did miss it at times.
“Daemon?’
“What would you like for your birthday?” you asked him as you realized it would come soon as well, you were on the island when you turned 27, he had gone out of his way to collect fresh coconut water and had made a fruit platter for you which was more than enough on that forsaken place.
“I want your trust and faith in me” you turned around as he said that and kissed him softly.
Besides he was planning something to surprise you with instead, he had a meeting with his lawyer for the same reason and his lawyer certainly didn't think it was a great idea to go forward with this but he knew he wanted to do this, for both of you.
“And i want to take you somewhere with me” he said to you
“Mmmm where?” You giggled as your heart skipped a beat. You just hoped he wasn't going to take you to meet his family just yet. It felt too soon for that.
“It's going to be a surprise, hence the trust and faith demand“
“I trust you baby” his lips curved into a sweet smile as you said that.
The plan moving forward was to take a nap with him and it was very cozy until he began shivering in his sleep, telltale sign of a nightmare and you knew what it was about, it was about that night in the woods that he had spent all alone without you, he deeply struggled with the memory of the night and it was very hard on him so you know he was reliving the same trauma in his sleep. Or that's what you thought.
You didn't know that he was having a nightmare but not about being stranded in the woods but about you being bitten by that spider, he always had a nightmare about that night where instead of you being alright the next morning he saw your dead lifeless body and he was left all alone without his brave girl by his side.
When he woke up he pretended as if he wasn't affected by the nightmare in the slightest and asked you to get ready as you were both invited to the Paradise for Cole's birthday. Luckily Lily wasn't there because of her injury but the group had decided to visit her post drinking.
When you reached hand in hand with him, it felt a little awkward, people who recognised you kept staring and you felt like an animal in the zoo. The attention was uncomfortable, as you just wanted to blend in with the other people and enjoy the evening without the scrutiny.
Life had changed in more ways than one, at times you were not even Daemon or y/n, you were just that couple that was stranded on an island for six months. Whenever you were out in public, people would inevitably make reference to your story, and you found yourself being treated like a celebrity. You felt objectified though as if there was nothing more to you anymore than what you had suffered.
After greeting Cole as you spotted Emma you walked towards her.
“How's D?” She asked you so you looked at her confused for a moment.
“Daemon? He's doing okay umm-”
“No the Dick..how's his dick..is it as good as rumored?” she asked you as she crossed her arms so you pulled her into a hug.
“I'm sorry em.. I'm so sorry for being such a bitch when you were just looking out for me”
Your eyes teared up as you spoke to her so she hugged you as tightly as you were hugging her.
“It's okay..I get that..they tell me not to take it personally..you both have been through something none of us can imagine living through” you looked down as she said that.
“That's not an excuse to lash out but I'll be careful i promise..now let's get drunk..it's been a while and you're going to reveal every tea about Aemond” she blushed bright red as you whispered the last part in her ear. You were happy for her, she deserved someone making her happy and gleeful like this.
A band was performing in the club and you noticed how Daemon kept looking at them while they played as if wondering about his own time on the stage, you knew he missed singing and being up there.
Afterwards when the group decided to go see Lily you chose to opt out but Daemon insisted and pleaded until you gave in, perhaps seeing him with you would finally make her back off a little bit and she'd realize that Daemon has moved on from their toxic relationship.
However as you all turned up at her place you saw a man leaving her house, you recognised him even though nobody else did, it was one of the major crew members at Queen Utopia, Danny something, you didn't remember his full name but he was the man Lily was with that night. He handled the maintenance of the cargo area.
As he walked past you he looked you right in the eye, you saw something in those eyes but you couldn't put your finger on it.
They always told you to not put blame on anyone as the tragedy was nobody's fault but what if it was somebody's fault? And what if it was Danny who had something to do with it?
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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arachnoia · 10 months
Text
necklace ʚɞ ˖✧˖°.| miguel o'hara
miguel o'hara x nb! reader
in which the leader of the powerful spider society falls for one of nueva york's most infamous criminals...
warnings- fluff! not proofread/it’s a drabble! reader is assumed to know/ speak spanish
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———————
"He looks so sad..." Gwen remarked. Miles and Hobie nodded as Pavitr crossed his arms, "It doesn't help that his only best friend is a literal A.I!"
"That's true, mate. It’s like he’s deathly allergic to the idea of fun...And people."
The group judged Miguel from a distance, who was eating his lunch silently...and alone.
Lyla popped out of thin air. "Hey! It's not like I can ignore him even if I wanted to." She rolled her eyes and pointed to Miguel, "He needs some romance here. It's actually sad. Yesterday, his screen time was 23 hours that day!"
Miles scoffed, "You would think with allat screen time, that he would jump on a dating website-"
"Excuse me?"
Miles' eyes widened as he noticed a shadow behind him. "N-Nothing!"
"Right...Once you guys are done, we have a mission. So eat quickly and meet in my office."
Pavitr laughed once he and Lyla left, "How would he get bitches if everyone is scared of him!"
----------
As soon as they finished eating, Miles, Gwen, Pavitr, and Hobie were met with a fuming Miguel, throwing different metal parts all over the room in frustration.
"Be careful guys, he isn't happy," Margo said, sucking her teeth, "He was just looking at his monitors and just started throwing stuff!"
Hobie patted her shoulder, "Yea mate, we can tell he's not the jolliest right now."
Lyla appeared in front of them and nervously chuckled, "Heyyy guys!"
Miguel slowly turned around to glare at the four Spiders. "Let's go."
Miles raised his eyebrows, "You didn't even tell us what we're supposed to-"
Miguel grabbed Miles by his suit and fumed, "You don't ask me questions."
He let Miles go, causing him to fall as Miguel grabbed his own forehead and groaned, "You know what, stay here. I'll deal with this myself."
He started walking away as the four Spiders looked at each other, stunned.
……..
You flinched slightly as you heard the alarms go off, the screeching hurting your ears, "Damn those alarms."
You were one of Nueva York's most infamous criminals, never being caught by anyone even though the city was home to the Spider Society. That was probably your biggest flex.
You were currently walking through the rubble of the building you just exploded in order to get some stone you've been wanting. It was pretty and you saw it in an exhibition.
Plus it’s fun to get attention from what you considered your hobby; causing a wreckage of Nueva York.
You started to lean on the side of an alleyway as you played with your gold necklace, having replaced your uniform for a basic white shirt, leather jacket, and your favorite tight jeans.
“Eres una pinche pendeja. You’re a fucking IDIOT, N/n!”
You looked behind you and saw your favorite person to get attention from just a few meters away.
“Miguelito! What a pleasure to see you here!” You smiled, waving at him from afar. You mentally cheered. He didn’t have his uniform (which you have always found so sexy on him) and he had his grey turtleneck, black slacks, and some shoes you gifted him which were some retro Air Jordan 1s in black and white. You may or may not have stolen them.
You tilted your head, sensing his anger from miles away. It was amusing to witness.
“Vente pa’ca, Y/n.”
“Why don’t you make me, Miguel?”
Your teasing made him even more upset and you laughed, running swiftly towards him. You stretched your arms, gave him a hug, and stuffed your face on his chest.
“I love your sexy cologne. It smells so good, baby.”
He pulled away from your strong grip and grabbed the bridge of his nose out of frustration, “No puedo más contigo. Why did you do that?!” He said. You smiled at his upset nature and laughed.
“Babyyy, what happened to ‘Hi’ or ‘How are you’? Y tu ya sabes mi respuesta para eso.” You snickered, having your hands on your hips.
“You can’t stop? Can’t you? You’re acting like a goddamn idiot. One of these days, someone is going to catch you and it’s not going to be me,” he sneered while glaring at you.
You scoffed at him and turned your head, gazing at the destruction you caused from afar.
“Oh fuck. how could the Spider Society take this? Their so precious leader going out with me! Little ol’ me! How embarrassing,” you cried out.
“Oh yeah! Me? Spider-man? Going out with Nueva York’s most wanted? God forbid anyone finds out,” he snarled.
The two of you stared at each other before you started cackling. Even Miguel started to chuckle silently.
“M-My god! Miguel, you’re making me look like a crazy person here!” you laughed.
He rolled his eyes and smiled, “That’s ‘cause you are, N/n.”
It was quite an unexpected pairing with you two being close.
You two met at a nightclub after Lyla and Jess forced him to go in order to “loosen up”, they said.
The whole night, he couldn’t help but stare at you as you danced, in nothing but a short crop top and shorts, making your legs look long and sexy.
After mentally preparing himself, you went up to him, buying him a drink and striking conversation.
He liked that about you and how you were so confident.
You were his polar opposite.
Quite literally, after he found you out and caught you vandalizing one of Nueva York’s most famous buildings other than Spider Society headquarters.
He was a mess for the whole week to say the least.
“You know, it would be better if you joined me in a life of crime.”
You went towards him, caressing his face and gazing at his eyes.
“Just the two of us…Imagine all the fun we can have.”
He smiled as he played with your necklace, “I could think of some ways.”
Your eyes lighted up, “So you’re up for it?”
“Absolutely…Not.”
You pouted at him, “But we make such a great team. In the streets and in the shee-“
He glared at you, “I don’t want to hear you finish that sentence.”
He tilted your head upwards, using his fingers to position your chin. “Pero no creas que voy a dejar que me desobedezcas más,” he said as his thumb grazed your lips softly.
“Or what?”
His lips enveloped yours as you began to make out, him pushing you against the wall of a building in the alleyway.
“You don’t want to find out, mi amor.”
You broke from the kiss and gazed up at him. “Who says I don’t wanna find out?”
…….
Miles and Gwen looked at Miguel from across the cafeteria, frightened, “This is kind of scary…”
Pavitr nodded, “It’s like looking at a dog walk with its hind legs.”
“Mate’s smiling while eating. SMILING! The man won’t even LAUGH but he smiles?” Hobie yelps, shaking poor Pavitr as they ravel in Miguel’s unusual behavior.
Miguel then stands up and walks towards the vending mashing in the cafeteria and the group straightens up.
Before he reaches, he stops at their table and glared at them, “What are you guys smiling about?”
Gwen chuckles, “N-Nothing! Hey Miguel, your necklace accessory thing is very-“
“NICE! IT TOTALLY SUITS YOU!” Miles interrupted, smiling ear to ear to get on Miguel’s good side.
“Weirdos..” Miguel muttered as he walked to the vending machine.
While he was pressing the numbers, he couldn’t help but smile a bit and play with his new necklace he had gotten as a gift the day prior.
translations-
Eres una pinche pendeja - You’re a fucking dumbass
Vente pa’ca - Come over here (shortened version of Vente para aća)
No puedo más contigo. - I can’t anymore with you
Y tu ya sabes mi respuesta para eso- And you already know my answer to that
Pero no creas que voy a dejar que me desobedezcas más - But don’t think I’m gonna let you disobey me even more
requests are open on my page if you wanna drop one :)
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daisychainsandbowties · 8 months
Note
what is it about that season one shoulder pat you love so much??
i have a bit of a fascination with what i call character thesis moments. they’re… these sort of pivotal, revealing scenes or even just (as in this case) a gesture that makes me fall head-over-heels for a character. and also understand them.
with ava, it was the beach run scene. for lilith, the grey hoodie scene where she asks ava “can you forgive me?” for mary it was the first scene, cradling shannon’s head and shutting her eyes and the love in every inch of every gesture. (that’s the first sign i think that warrior nun is a story about love, and survival, and in not surviving but loving anyway).
now, i’ll admit that i adored beatrice from “i thought she’d be a handful” and “faith is my business” but frankly… neither of those scenes show us who she is. i think the closest we get to HER is at the bus stop, where you watch her choose her friends over her duty, choose love over sacrifice (for the first, but not the last time).
and then… god, that shoulder slap. i can’t explain how it made me feel.
up until that point, beatrice is such a whirlwind of a character. she’s lethal, she faces down a gun with frightening disregard for her own life. she drops a tear onto shannon’s cheek as she gasps out a very rehearsed goodbye. she catches ava when she slips out of that wall, she cries over an old journal and in all that time she’s fighting so hard to remain unseen.
and then, in one gesture, she reveals who she is. if you look closely, you see how fiercely beatrice fights to hold herself, but especially her hands, in check. they are either weapons or they’re things she lets out with the greatest care. they are caring but also tentative, like moths desperately trying not to touch the flame.
if you look carefully you also see that beatrice can’t help but touch ava. she tries and tries, but then they’re in the vatican and she’s suddenly this young, smiling creature trading puns, rushing through a cloud of dust to pry ava from the wreckage of her faith, from the arms of an angel. i just think, when i saw that shoulder slap i realised how much there was to beatrice.
she’s this… ball of contradictions. she’s a nun, she came up with Cruella de Jesus. she’s faithful, she’s queer, she’s resigned to the death of everyone she loves. she’s a weapon, and yet… you look at her doing that slightly goofy shoulder slap and it betrays a sense of ‘i want to touch you and i don’t know what to do about it.’ and in that you realise that she’s everything you thought and she’s also… mischievous? slightly boyish? a fool who is already more than half in love.
i remember feeling so fond of her, so suddenly, because out of the clear blue you realise that she’s drawn to this, to this girl who told her not to hate what she is, not to hate what she craves which is touch… a certain something she doesn’t dare to name, but still she reaches out and THAT is beatrice to me.
she’s a pair of empty hands, a bottle of lightning, and for all her confidence, for all that she is undeniably so cool and calm under pressure, so absolutely lethal; she’s also young, and she doesn’t know what to do about what she feels. it terrifies her, fascinates her, makes her hands move almost of their own accord.
there is ava, who is the point around which she is supposed to rally. halobearer, holy, doomed. that little pat in the shoulder… when i take it from ava’s perspective i’m in awe, because they don’t quite understand each other yet. it’s a candleflame to the incandescence of their kiss but it’s the first time bea reaches out not to catch her, or capture her, or carry her, but simply to touch.
it’s a very blunt and beautiful reassurance and that’s what they are to each other; they’re comfort, safety, acceptance. and that throwaway moment to me is the thesis of bea’s character arc. it’s the choosing to touch, to reach out, to hold onto what she loves.
and for ava it’s sacred too. how many times in her life do you imagine she’s been touched the way beatrice touches her? the way she balances ava’s jaw in her hands when she falls from the wall, smiling at her like she’s a miracle. beatrice who is the voice in the dark and the cold, who tears down a wall to reach her because she promised and she kept it. touch is everything to ava, and i think there’s just something so special about that moment; beatrice just saying, wordlessly, ‘you’re good, you’re here, i’ve got your back.’ it’s not condescending it’s a gesture that i think demonstrates to ava that she’s not alone anymore, and it kindles the hope that she never will be again.
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haikyuuhoo · 6 months
Text
if you could change anything, please just stay the same (because i love everything about you)
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pairing: gojo x reader (but their relationship isn't the focus of this at all, just a very small part of the foundation)
wc: 876
a/n: meant to take place immediately after the end of jjk 0. sorry for the sads, but i thrive in angst. also sorry for the fact that this is very rushed and probably not great lol i just wanted to write something and this is what happened.
listen
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The wind whips around you as you step out onto the roof, and you have to fight to keep your balance as you walk toward the figure standing on the ledge.
He’s got his hands in his pockets, facing out over the rest of Jujutsu High’s campus and staring silently at the rubble that the day’s incidents have caused.
“Do you think it could have been different?” Satoru asks when you approach.
You’re surprised he heard your footsteps over the sound of the wind, but then you remember that it’s probably not that, that he probably sensed your presence—or whatever it is those eyes of his allow him to do.
“What do you mean?” You know he’s asking about today, about the fight and the wreckage and the casualties, but you’re not quite sure which part he’s asking about specifically. “I’m sure lots of things could have gone differently, but we didn’t know exactly what they were planning. We prepared well, I think, but—”
“Do you think Geto could have stayed?”
You’re taken aback, not at all expecting that question, and expecting even less that he would be asking about something that happened ten years ago. You stare at him, weighing your response before you finally speak. “You know he couldn’t have. You let him live, but he would have been killed if he stayed here.”
Satoru hesitates, his body unwavering despite the fact that the toes of his shoes are hanging over the ledge and the wind is picking up. Part of you worries he wouldn’t even try to stop himself if he fell.
His voice is incredibly soft when he speaks next, but you still hear it.
“Do you think, if I weren’t me, he would still be here?”
You physically recoil at the question, and you immediately want to say no, to shout it over the wind, but your throat is closing up and you can’t even attempt to speak before he continues.
“We were the strongest. And then I… I pushed him away, didn’t I? I was so focused on perfecting my technique and becoming the best that I didn’t even realize that we turned into me. And I didn’t even notice what was happening to him, how… not okay he was.” He swallows hard, and you imagine he’s squeezing his eyes shut tight behind his bandages in that way he does when he’s frustrated. “I was so selfish.”
Satoru turns to face you, and you nearly reach out to pull him away from the ledge. You know the fall wouldn’t kill him—not even close—but it still makes your stomach lurch with unease. “If I was literally anybody else, he would still be here. He would still be alive. I wouldn’t have had to—” His whole body shakes with the breath he sucks in. “Do you have any idea how often I wish I wasn’t like this?”
This time you can’t help yourself, you reach out and tug him toward you, wrapping your arms tightly around his torso as if he'll fall away if you let him go. And he lets you, drops his infinity so you can touch him—so he can touch you—and Satoru nearly crumples in on himself, clinging to you as he begins to cry. “I’m trying so fucking hard—”
“I know,” you whisper. You’ve never seen him like this. It was bad when Riko died and worse when Geto defected, but Gojo Satoru has never seemed so small before, has never needed someone to hold him together.
Because he’s the strongest, after all.
He doesn’t need anyone.
Right?
“If I could go back, I would change so much. I would change me if I could, I swear. I don’t deserve to be here any more than him just because I was born with these stupid fucking techniques.”
“Don’t say that,” you say quietly, because you know if you speak more than a whisper he’ll hear that you’ve started crying too. “You’re so good, Satoru. You care so much about these kids and you never stopped caring about Geto. If you weren’t you—”
“If I weren’t me, everything would be better.”
You feel your heart shatter in your chest.
Because you know, without a shadow of a doubt, that it’s not true.
But you stay quiet, the statement hanging in the air, just letting him hold you because you know that’s what he needs right now.
“If I could change anything—”
“Don’t change a thing,” you say firmly. You feel a sob wrack through him, and you bury your face against his shoulder. “Don’t change. We need you.”
I love you.
You know this will pass. That tomorrow will come and you’ll all rebuild, forever altered, but you’ll slowly get better. That he’ll go back to being Gojo Satoru, the strongest sorcerer of the modern age and the typical annoying goofball that you fell in love with.
But for now, you’re content to let him need you, to let him hold you tightly and be vulnerable in a way he so rarely ever allows himself to be, to help him carry some of the weight of the world that was placed on his shoulders the day he was born.
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reblogs & comments always appreciated <3
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taylortruther · 5 days
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i don’t think so high school feels out of place at all! i think it’s actually the culmination of the album in a lot of ways and ties up a lot of running themes very intentionally. think about every other mention of substance use on the album, compared to “i’ll drink what you think and i’m high from smoking your jokes all damn night.” every instance of Bad Icky Sex Themes™ compared to the youthful giddiness of “pull me to the backseat” and “touch me while your bros play grand theft auto.” all the mental health and insanity themes throughout the album compared to comparing herself to a madman bc she’s so in love that she’s hearing his voice and laugh in her head. and, least subtly and imo most importantly, the whole song literally being about how she feels young again – not just young but specifically like a teenager, with all the time in the world still ahead of her – after it was such a major theme (even if often only subtextually) that she was terrified she’d wasted her youth, given joe too many years, was running out of time to have the type of future that she wanted so desperately. to me this song’s inclusion makes perfect sense bc it feels very much like by including it she’s wrapping up the earlier events of the album, saying that chapter really is closed now and the madness of last year is over, she’s walked through the wreckage and finally come out on the other side. the themes of the earlier songs still linger, as trauma always does, but they’re referenced so completely differently now because she’s in a much healthier place than she was during the other songs that deal with those themes more heavily. it feels so much lighter than the rest of the album because SHE feels so much lighter than she did then.
tl;dr i think so high school IS like a glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel, and that it was written and themed very intentionally to be exactly that.
thank you for this! it definitely feels out of place but there's meaning there.
also love that you pointed out that the song is very much grounded in mundanity, but she's "hearing voices like a madman" in that moment as she thinks of him doing something normal and silly. i clocked that too! such a fun way to tie in to the themes of the album.
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niki-phoria · 7 months
Text
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pairing: chishiya x gn!reader (no pronouns used) genre: angst word count: 821
warnings: blood, death, canon-typical violence, death
includes: possibly ooc chishiya, kinda hurt no comfort ?? very angsty lol, ambiguous ending
summary: after a grueling battle with the king of spades, you search for chishiya in your final moments
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and if you go, i wanna go with you / and if you die, i wanna die with you
carnage.
the only thing you can see is carnage. blood seeps into the asphalt around you. you’re not sure if it’s yours. 
the fabric of your t-shirt is stuck to your skin. each shaky breath you take is shallow as you force the air into your lungs. your hands tremble as you lift them up towards the sky. deep red streaks are embedded into your flesh. your vision is blurry. you feel disoriented. everything hurts. 
“chishiya,” you whisper. his name leaves your lips like a prayer. squinting at the sky, you almost confuse the sun for his warmth. the light is far more comforting than the hard ground below. 
“y/n?” someone asks from beside you. her voice is shaky. she sounds familiar. kuina. “are you okay?”
“chishiya,” you repeat. “i need to find him.” squeezing your eyes shut, you push yourself to sit up. your head aches. you’re not sure how far you’re able to move. the world spins for a second before everything pauses for a second. 
you take the opportunity to glance around. the alleyway has a fresh coating of red splattered across the walls. stray bullet holes leave tiny windows into the nearby buildings. your skin is coated in a heavy layer of filth and grime. 
every muscle in your body tenses as you push yourself even farther. in a blur, you’re finally standing. you lean against the wall for support, shuffling your feet against the ground as you slowly begin to move. 
there’s even more wreckage outside of the alleyway. debris litters the earth below. blood and gore decorate your surroundings. bile rises in your throat at the sight, but you continue pushing yourself to move regardless. i can afford to be selfish just this once, you reason. if i’m going to die, i might as well die with my lover.
retracing your steps is easier than you had expected. you stumble past aguni, paying no mind to the blank look in his eyes as he stares up at the sun. there are a million things he could be looking for. you don’t care about any of them. not anymore.
you grunt when you lose your balance once again, tripping over your own feet. you tumble into a nearby car; your body slams into the side of the vehicle. a part of you worries about setting off the alarm but it is quickly squandered by the realization that the owner is likely dead. at least there’s no one left to be annoyed by the repetitive noise.
“y/n?” he breaks the silence with a breathless whisper. he looks more shocked than you do. tears sting in your eyes. 
you leave a trail of blood in your wake as you slide against the side of the cool metal. you maneuver yourself around to the other edge of the car before abruptly stopping. time freezes.
you blink once. then again. a third time. you rack your brain in an attempt to make sense of the sight of the man before you. chishiya. 
“‘shiya.” you let yourself collapse onto the ground beside him. your knees buckle under the weight of relief - or maybe the strain from moving. you’re not sure anymore.
chishiya is quick to grab onto you, letting you lean your aching body against his. your blood seeps into the white fabric of his jacket. his fingers grip your arms before moving upwards to support your face. 
chishiya’s hand slips away from your face to instead press against your side. you hiss at the pressure, coiling into yourself. “i’m sorry,” he whispers. you already know that he is. that he’d take away your pain if he could. that he wishes he could do more. 
you look at him through blurry vision. tears roll down your cheeks in waves. his touch is gentle as he wipes them away.
“y/n,” he repeats. you can feel his gaze all over you - scanning your body for the worst injury. the one he should treat first. bad habits die hard, you suppose. 
you bury your face into the crook of his neck. chishiya has let up on the pressure. instead, his arms rest gingerly around your waist, keeping you wrapped comfortably in his hold. you’re grateful. 
“i love you.” your words slur together. you’re sure they’re nearly inaudible as you mumble them against his skin. 
“i love you too,” chishiya whispers. each syllable is clear as it leaves his lips but you know him well enough to recognize the small waver that stings at the end of each word. you know him well enough to know his grip around your body is tight for a reason. you know him well enough to know that the tears staining your cheeks are not only your own. 
you can hear fireworks in the distance. closing your eyes, you allow darkness to surround you. you imagine the beautiful hues of colour decorating the sky as the world finally fades away.
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peterman-spideyparker · 3 months
Text
The Girl Before (Matt Murdock x fem!Reader)
Author’s Note: Hi! This was written on my phone in maybe fifteen minutes and isn’t really proofread. I don’t know why I have so many angsty ideas lately, but here’s another one. I might do a part two, but for all intents and purposes right now, this is a stand alone.
Summary: You love Matt. Even after your breakup, you still have so much love for him. But now, it’s clear that you’re the furthest thing from his mind.
Warnings: Angst, unrequited love, drinking, heartbreak
Other Characters: Foggy Nelson, Karen Page
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You don’t even know why you’re drinking a beer. You hate beer. You don’t even know why you’re here at Josie’s. But it’s the only thing that makes sense for you to be doing right now. It’s sad to be drinking alone, drowning your sorrows in the dark of your apartment, but it’s even sadder to be drinking alone in a bar with a drink you don’t even like to try and get over a guy. But the thing is, it’s not just some guy. It’s Matt.
Matt is the love of your life, you have no question in your mind about that. You were in love with him, and he was in love with you. But somewhere, somehow, something went wrong. Terribly, horribly wrong, and he broke your heart and left you to pick up the pieces. For him, it was like he was tearing off a bandage. But for you, it was like the car stalling on the tracks with a train barreling toward you showing no signs of stopping until all that was left behind was wreckage. An unrecognizable mess from something out of the blue.
Somehow, you heard that Matt was engaged. To whom, you don’t know, and when he’s making that vow in front of his loved ones, you don’t know. If anything, she’s probably gorgeous. Matt has always had a type, a type that you always felt you were an anomaly in. He never seemed to care, and after a while, you believed him. He just loved you, no strings attached. Sweet affection, soft kisses, seemingly unconditional love. And then, one day, it all just came undone.
Maybe that’s the real reason you’re here—on the off chance you’ll run into Matt, you’ll come to him or he’ll come to you, you’ll patch things up, and you could move back toward what you were. You know the kind of life he leads. It’s hard, so damn hard, but you know you can trust him and what he does and he knows that you’ll be there for him when he needs you. With another swig of your drink, you purse your lips and frown as it goes down your esophagus. Ugh, you really hate beer. As the bottle meets the napkin on the counter, your attention is drawn to the opening door. A small little group in black tie attire enters, laughing and cheering as they enter the bar for their little reception. Your heart stops and you almost fall off of your stool when you see Karen, Foggy, and Matt as some of the last bodies to enter in the group. The move to a couple of tables in the back, Matt kissing the temple of one of the girls in the group. The fiancée, no doubt. The way he smiles, how he carries himself as he moves to the bar breaks your heart. He pauses when he gets to the bar, seemingly recognizing your presence at the far end of it, but you see a little shiny, new gold band encircling his fourth finger. Your heart shatters, the shards then cutting you from the inside out leaving you in immeasurable pain. Why weren’t you good enough for him to stay? What did you do wrong? Why don’t you have the matching ring on your left hand?
Before the tears can roll down your face and you lose all sense of emotional control at the end of the bar, you place some money on the counter and hop off your stool, throwing your bag over your shoulder and rushing out of the bar as fast as you possibly can. Except for Matt noticing you, or at least what you think is him noticing you, you make a pretty clean escape.
When you met Matt, you were so sure he was the one. Now, you have to live with the fact that to the love of your life—the only person you ever really, truly loved—you didn’t mean as much to him as he did you. To Matt, you were just the girl before the one.
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Matt Murdock Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters
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dreamsgazer · 2 years
Text
Getting Sick and Getting Better
Reader gets sick. Tangerine takes care of her!
Minors DO NOT INTERACT.
Also, reblogs and comments and kudos are GREATLY appreciated.
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“Would you fucking just lay down?” Tangerine practically snarls, his cockney accent stronger than ever. It always makes an appearance in full force when he is stressed.
He seems very much stressed out now, you yawn, while he pushes a rebel curl away from his reddened face. You would laugh if you weren’t feeling as sick as you are sure you look. One of the deadliest assassins in the world – the one who did the Bolivian job, the one who was fished out from the wreckage of a Japanese train with a bullet in his neck, the one that after finding his twin convinced him to be back at work less than two months after his very, very near-death experience – one of them was fretting because you got a fever.
Granted, it sucks. You rarely get sick, but when it happens, you subscribe the full package: nausea, fever, bones turned into splinters inside your limbs. It is a mess, and to make everything worse, you don't seem able to hold anything in your stomach.
After the third time in two hours that you visited the toilet on wobbly legs to give back to the planet your cup of tea, Tangerine has taken the reins of the situation, ignoring your protests. He called – screamed – for his doctor to come and visit you right away. You can’t be sure, but the words “firing you and then setting your studio on fire” were possibly growled.
The doctor has told the two of you exactly what you told your very worried, very handsome boyfriend: you simply need to rest, stay hydrated, and take some paracetamol.
“Told you, T,” you have coughed as soon as you were again alone with him. You have tried to get up and go in search of a box of paracetamol, prompting him to …  firmly invite you to lay down.
At the beginning of your relationship, you had been a tad hurt by his manners. It has taken a bit to understand that Tangerine cares for the people he loves with ferocious passion and stubborn, twisted tenderness.
He looks at you, your head peeking out from under the mountain of blankets he has insisted to wrap you in “Sorry,” he mutters rubbing a hand over his eyes with a sigh “I’ll fetch the medicine for you, alright, love?”
You nod, grateful. It’s a welcomed change to have someone looking after you.
He helps you to drink a bit of water, and you make an effort not to wince while trying to swallow the pill. It really hurts your throat, and he can sense it.
Tangerine helps you to lie down again and presses a kiss to your burning and sweaty forehead. You want to cry at the tenderness he displays, and when he looks at you, he grimaces, misunderstanding your emotion “That bad, darling?”.
You shake your head and whispers words of gratitude and affection for his presence, words that make his chest tighten with love and fury. Love for you, who has decided for whatever miracle to let him in your life, in your bed, and in your heart. Fury remembering how badly you must have been threatened to be moved by something as trivial as having him offering you a cup of water when you lay sick and helpless.
You haven’t talked much about your past. He knows you have family and he’s aware that some of those relationships are complicated to say the least. You haven’t told him a lot, yes, but he has lived enough and seen enough to understand that something has gone very wrong.
However, he seems to decide that the past can go fuck itself. You need him now; he can get angry at your family later.    
You cough a bit, making him sigh. Of course, your throat hurts, it has been two days that your lungs wouldn’t give you a break.
He sits next to you, gently rubbing your shoulder “Do you think you can eat something?”.
You think about it carefully, chewing your lip. During on of your first dates, you had confessed him it bothers you so much to bite your lip when you are thinking.
“Why?” he had asked, with a smirk, comfortably laying on his chair. You had shrugged “It makes me look childish, I guess.”
“I think it makes you look sexy,” had been his smooth reply. You had blushed, hard. His smirk had grown bigger. On anyone else you would have found it insufferable, but on him?
His smirk had made you want to crawl over the table and stick your tongue in his mouth. Which you did as soon as you were back in his lavish car, by the way, and later that night he – always the gentleman – had reciprocated sticking his tongue in your cunt.
While you are reviving your delightfully indecent memories, Tangerine seems lost in thought “I can’t cook shit” he mutters to himself, rubbing his forehead “but I’m gonna order something from The Terrace.”
He brought you there during your very first date. It is his favourite restaurant in London.
Classy enough not to have chairs but little, shockingly comfortable velvety armchairs, and quiet enough that you can hear the gentle piano music playing in the background, and leather covered menus that don’t specify how much those dishes with complicated names cost.  
You still remember how much you two chatted that evening. How much you wanted him to kiss you senseless – which he did as soon as you two stepped out from the restaurant, pinning you against a wall, releasing months of pent-up pining.
“Do you think they make broth there?” you inquire. He shrugs “ ‘ bet that if I pay them well enough they are gonna cook pretty much anything.”
“You know, I think I can manage to get up and make some broth,” you try again.  His glare stops further suggestions “Nonsense. You are sick, pet, and sick people should stay in bed and let their partner take care of them.”.
You want to reply that you don’t want for him to spend so much energy or money over you, but he huffs, frowning “Jesus Christ, you are almost as bad as I am! Lay down, would you? And then I will read something for you. If you behave,” he tuts sternly, pressing another quick kiss on your forehead.
You smile at those words. He rarely offers to read aloud, not because he doesn’t like having your full attention, but because reading for someone else is possible the only thing that makes him slightly conscious of his accent.
The afternoon it clicked for you that something so trivial was bothering him – You are not going to understand half of the words, love, trust me! Better if you read it on your own! – was the afternoon you spent telling him how charming you thought his accent was. Not that he has ever admitted he is unsure about it. Like you never said out loud you were scared he was going to run for the hills the moment he was going to see you naked, rolls and stretch marks on full display.
Some things, even if unspoken, come clear with time and require kind words, and tenderness, and affection. Sometimes, they require silence. 
You sleep a bit while he calls the restaurant, and he gently wakes you up entering your bedroom with a massive tray. His broad shoulders and tall frame occupy your visual in such a perfect way that it seems completely normal to have Tangerine in your bedroom, insisting on spoon feeding you, sitting on the edge of the bed, close enough that you can smell his rich cologne.
The broth smells delicious as well, actually, and you have managed to convince him you are weak, but not on your deathbed. He lets you eat by yourself but surveys your movements like a hawk, ready to intervene in case of need.
“It’s really tasty,” you sighed happily, slowly sipping it from your spoon. He beams with pride as if he has been the one to cook it. You can’t help but reciprocate his smile.  
“I will feel better soon,” you promise, taking another sip “you won’t have to take care of me for much longer, I swear.”
He gently wraps a hand on the back of your neck, his blue eyes staring right into your heart “Tired of me already, love?”
You huff a laugh, gently pressing your forehead against his “I will never be tired to have you in my bedroom, Tangerine.”
He grins even if your joke is pathetic, and you continue, more serious “I just don’t want to waste the time we have together before you and Lemon have to leave again.”
Tangerine nods. You know he disagrees this is a waste of time, but he also understands that is not easy for you to let him go to his missions.
You will probably never voice that aloud. When you understood what he does for a living and who he is, he had given you the choice to waltz out of his life.
A chance you had refused without a second thought. A chance you still refuse with all your strength.
It doesn’t mean it’s easy. But god, you think kissing the tip of his nose and making him chuckle, it’s so worth it.  
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Had an idea for some Yan!TP LinkxReader who could also shift into a wolf. Working on requests!
Tw: Yandere, Mentions of murder, Mentions of Cannibalism, Obsession
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝
Link always knew there was something special about you. That was, something beyond the obvious. You were a being of absolute divinity in both beauty and intelligence. Not only that, but you saw him as a fitting devotee to grace with your presence. You saw him worthy of your worship. Someone to keep around rather than abandon, unlike some others he’s loved before. Of course you, absolutely incredible and utterly divine you, was special. There was absolutely no doubt about it —he’d kill anyone who had anything to say otherwise. He didn’t see the need to entertain or engage with such obvious mistruths. But there was always a nagging feeling that there was more to you than he could simply gather at face value. That there was something drawing him to you like a moth to a flame. Like he had some innate need for your presence like a starving man needs food. And yet, no matter how hard he tried nor how long he searched, he couldn’t exactly pin it. Perhaps it was sacrilegious of him to even doubt you, but his senses had never before led him wrong.
One must understand that, in the wreckage of his life post his heroics, the more animalistic side of him had since begun to merge with his sense of humanity. Two things, realms, entities mixing to eventually make some middle ground— an equilibrium. That line between man and beast blurred and bled into one another until he was more of himself than he ever was before. He could track down any missing person —incredibly useful for wrangling the rowdy children of Ordon— a task he could previously only do as a wolf but could now achieve as a human. He now had an odd hunger for raw meat. Originally, this happened posed quite a problem, as people don’t take well to seeing another person scarf down slabs of raw meat. But, as always, you provided a solution. Whenever he’d have to kill a man in offering to you —as they’d gotten too close to you, too close to touching what wasn’t theirs— all Link would need to do after the job was pick the bones clean. The carcass left quite a message, he was sure.
There was, However, the final issue he used to struggle with. The beast often demanded a Mate. He supposed it made some form of sense —the hunger for satisfaction. After All, it’s not like the beast can really understand that there’s more to living than survival and reproduction when you have consciousness. Whenever the urge would come back, knawing at his ribs like a spitting fire daring to be tamed, he’d let it fizzle out. It was all the real options he had. The beast didn’t beg for just anyone to tame the teeming flames. Instead it urged for someone specific. But of course, for no one he knew of. It cried and howled, with no way to sate the beast’s desires. And so, Link resigned himself to waiting. Again, It’s not like he had any other option. But of course you, marvellous you. You were the solution. You happened to be the very one that his soul cried out to. The calm sun, dowsing him with light after so long of storms. Like moonlight to a moth and bread to a starving man, you saved and sated him down to the matter of his vary soul. He didn’t dare question it, not now he had you. That would be simply disgraceful of him to turn you away in even the slightest. So while you attuned yourself to him, he could spend all his time and energy toward cherishing you. He could spend everything toward your worship. While you learned of him and of his home, he learned what foods you best like and how you’d best like him so you would just stay by his side. Please- you’re all he has left.
The summer night was quiet in Ordon, the kids having gone to bed and most of the adults having gone to follow. Crickets buzzed in the tall grasses and the pleasantly cool night meant you could open up the windows. The two of you lounged inside, curled up close. His face was nuzzled into your neck, calmed by the familiarity and warmth of your scent.
“Link?” Your voice was soft and quiet to match the comfortable silence you’d established for yourselves. He hummed back to you in response, looking up. He basked in the attention you gave him, he was blessed that you picked him. You could have had anyone. Well not anyone, he’d kill his competitors.
“Look, I have to show you something, but you have to promise you won’t freak out.” He sat upright with the worry that pulled at your tone. You were too good to live a life that provided you with worries. He’s gone through so much that you could live in blissful peace as you deserve. He’d level towns- he’d bring death to Hyrule as the two of you know it if it means your worries are calmed. You slid off the couch and returned with your fluffy cloak in hand. It was your favorite, lined with a thick pelt capable of keeping you warm and dry in harsh weather. Not to mention, you looked utterly adorable when the fluff dwarfed your frame. You clipped it over your shoulders and anxiously adjusted it so it fit perfectly. You breathed slowly, and it was like energy breathed into the still room. There was a small glow of light, and when it cleared, you were no longer sitting before him. Instead, a wolf looked back at him, ears perked and the same intelligent eyes looking back at his own. You were like him. That’s why you were meant to be together, why his soul called to yours. Gods- you were perfect for him in ways he didn’t know he craved. He was hellbent on making sure that you’d live a good life, by any means necessary.
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