Tumgik
#i officially submitted all of my finals and final papers for the fall semester today. what will i be tomorrow. a real gamer
corpsentry · 3 years
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he is dying
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crescentsteel · 4 years
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Just Friends - Part 4
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plot: fubu set up with Kuroo as a university student, model fem reader
word count: 5612
A/N: I enjoyed writing this chapter, thus the extra thousand words. Don’t know how I should tag this. Smut, fluff, sexual tension (even though they had sex already?) I don’t really know lol. 
Listening to Over and Over Again by Nathan Sykes while writing the rooftop scene.
There’s still 4 chapters in my head. I know its so long already but like I just can’t let go of my original vision haha
Part 3 | Part 5 | m.list
After you finish reviewing your last paper for the semester, you walk to his couch and let yourself fall on it.
“Finally!”
You’re done with the semester. You feel relief, but you also feel the weariness of the past weeks coming down on you. You thought that when you finish all your requirements and exams, the first thing you’re going to do is have sex with Kuroo. Especially since you were at his place already.
“You done with your paper?” he says loudly from his room.
‘Yep!”
You hear his footsteps approaching. He lifts your legs up and places it on his lap as he sits. You ignore him and continue to relax. His fingers start to slowly caress your legs up to your thighs. You know where he’s going with it, and it does feel nice, but not sexually.
You sit up, which gets his attention. He makes his move immediately and is about to kiss you. Before his lips touch yours, you cover them with your hands. He stops with a puzzled look on his face.
“Sorry. I know it’s been a while, but I’m still tired.”
He grips your wrist and puts your hand down. He holds both your shoulders and nuzzles your neck.
“Mmm. I can’t change your mind?”
You laugh weakly and ruffle his usual bed hair.
“Let’s watch something on Netflix. Maybe we can ‘chill’ later.” You give him a lopsided smile which he returns.
“Alright. What do you wanna watch?”
“Romance.”
He frowns at you.
“What? I wanna watch something that does not need my full attention.” You defend yourself.
“Mkay.”
It’s been around an hour since the movie started. Your mind is afloat while you watch. You can’t follow the story, but you like this state of doing nothing and something at the same time. You check on how Kuroo is, only to find him asleep. You’re amused at how this isn’t so surprising. After all, you aren’t the only one who juggled studies. You’re not even sure if he’s done with his own.
You scoot beside him. You’re about to wake him up to tease him about sleeping, but he looks really out of it. You stare at him for a while. You don’t tell it to him because he’s going to rub it in your face, but he really is good-looking. You brush up his bangs that was always blocking his face. You get a full view of his features. You’ve never paid attention to how he looks when sleeping.
Before you know it, you lean closer to him and kiss him on the forehead. After your lips leave his skin, you freeze in horror. What the hell did you just do?!
You’re only friends with benefits. Nothing about that was sexual nor friendly. You know your boundaries. You shouldn’t have done that. You don’t even like Kuroo like that. Right?
You shake your head furiously. No no no. You’re just really tired. Maybe your brain absorbed the romance even though you weren’t fully paying attention to the movie. Yeah. That was it.
You like Kuroo for sex and sex only.
You shake him furiously. He sits up abruptly.
“Huh? What happened?” He’s obviously startled by how you shook him, but his eyes are still a bit disoriented.
You stand up and remove your shirt. Your shorts go next. He puts his arms on his thighs and slouches a bit to look at you more closely. His once-disoriented eyes are now completely focused on you.
You hold his gaze as you strip yourself naked down to your underwear. That was all it took for the air to sizzle with lust. Since you’re at it, might as well make the most out of it. You stride slowly towards him. You give your hips a bit of a sway, lingering minutely in each step you take. You keep your eyes on his, not faltering in any way.
When you reach him, you straddle his lap. His hardness that’s rasping his flimsy boxers instantly lets you know that he enjoyed the show. You cup his face and kiss him right away. You don’t waste any time. You stick your tongue on his mouth as you grind on his hard-on. You want to feel him more. You want it now. You have to harshly remind yourself that this is what you came for.
You take out his member and position it at your entrance.
Kuroo pulls away from the kiss. He holds your hips in place, stopping you.
“Is something wrong, kitten?”
His lust-filled eyes now have a hint of worry in them. Why should it matter if something is wrong? That shouldn’t be an issue. You want to be had. Plain and simple.
Damn it. You don’t like how this is making you feel.
“Nothing. Don’t you want it?” you ask impatiently.
“Hah! Of course I do. But you seem upset.”
You underestimate how he notices almost everything. No way you’re going to let him know what’s going on in your head.
You sigh. You hug him and purr on his ear.
“Tetsu, I badly need you to fuck me right now.”
He grunts. You never use his first name. You don’t use swear words as well. Only now.
That does the trick. You feel him twitch underneath you. You feel his grip tighten on your hips that it almost hurts.
“Oh kitten,” he places an open-mouthed kiss at your shoulder.
“I’m gonna ruin you tonight.” You shiver at how dangerously he said those words.
He pulls your hair, making you look at him again. You shudder at the raw desire completely visible on his face.
He plays with one nipple with his tongue while his right hand gropes the other. His left hand goes to your groin. He traces the warmth of your slit and rubs your clit at the end of his strokes. You grip his shoulders tightly for support. You yelp when he bites the hard bud while inserting two fingers inside you.
Ahh yes. This is what you want, to let both of your carnal hunger for each other take over you. To let it cloud your head and consume you until your mind goes blank.
You look for your laptop in the back seat, but it wasn’t there. You’re a hundred percent sure that you did not take it to your unit last night. You were so out of it that you just got inside, laid down, and slept. That could only mean that you left it at his apartment.
You hurriedly take out your phone and dials his number. After three rings, he picks up.
“Hey. Can I go there? I think I left my laptop there.”
“I’m not home, but I do have it with me. I was just about to call if you’re at campus.”
“Actually, yes I am.”
“I’m around the area. I’ll be there in 20 minutes or so.”
“Alright. Thanks!”
You drop the call first.
You find a seat at the benches near the university gate. You’ll just wait for him here so he won’t need to find you.
“Oh hi y.n. Have you submitted our last paper?” It’s Kira, one of your classmates from your Management Theories class. She’s with another classmate of yours, but you don’t remember her name.
You give both of them a frail smile. That was all you could manage.
“Not yet. I’m waiting for someone before I do.”
“You okay y.n.? You don’t look too good. You must’ve stayed up all night for our paper.”
“Hahaha. Yeaaah.”
Blatant lie. You finished your paper early. It was Kuroo that kept you all night. A man of his word he is, he ravaged you senseless. It was only sheer willpower that gave you the strength to drive home at 2am.
In fact, you don’t want to go outside today. Your shoulders are tender. Your hips and legs ache. You feel sore between your thighs. Even walking is a chore You just want to lie down and waste the day away.
You hear your text notification.
“I’m here.”
When you find him, his eyes are already on you. He grins and waves at you. You can see your laptop bag on his hand. You meet him halfway.
“Are you sick?” He puts his hand on your forehead. You swat his hand away.
“No. But my everything hurts.” You speak softly.
“Oya?” You pout and glare at him. He puts up his usual conceited grin.
“You asked for it, kitten.” He inches closer to you and tilts your chin up.
“Remember?”
You feel your face getting warm. You always match his provocations. You don’t back down, but that was when you’re at the confines of his apartment. This is the first time you’re in a public space since you met at the bar. This is your university, your domain. You are very much aware that other students who might know you, are passing by.
You gently push him with one hand.
“Stop it. We’re in public.” You warn him while looking around.
“Alright, alright. Here’s your thing.” He hands you your laptop bag.
“Uhh. Thanks, Kuroo.”
He raises an eyebrow.
“It was Tetsu last night.” You scoff. “That was a one-time thing. You should’ve savored it.”
You freeze when you feel his hand on your cheek. You’re not sure which is warmer, his hand or your face.
“I did savor it.” He pinches it lightly before letting go.
Before you’re able to react, he scurries away with a stupid smile. “Hehe. See ya, y.n” he salutes with two fingers and finally leaves.
You want to be annoyed, but you’re too tired.
“You and your boyfriend look like you came from a magazine. You’re so tall and pretty.” You hear Kira’s voice behind you. You harshly turn around to explain. You wave your hands frantically. “No, no, no. He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Eeehh? But you were so sweet.”
You laugh nervously. “He’s just a friend.”
Kira nods. “You should go home after you submit our paper, y.n. Your face is very red now.”
Damn him.
When you passed your paper two weeks ago, that officially ended your semester. Aside from your modeling gigs, you’ve only stayed at home. Kuroo’s been asking if you want to hang out, but you’ve been ignoring him. You needed the rest from juggling sex, work, and studies. You thought that you need to focus on one for now - work. But now you’re getting bored. It’s been two days since your last gig. What should you do today?
An unknown number suddenly pops on your phone.
“Hello y.n.?” It was a familiar calm voice.
“Kenma?”
“Yea. But it’s Kuroo who asked me to call.” You hear fumbling on the other end.
“Oi. Y.n. Why do you answer Kenma’s call but ignore mine, huh?” You sigh. You don’t really want to explain that you need some time away from him.
“Never mind that. I’m at Kenma’s. Wanna play here?”
You perk up. That’s perfect. You don’t have anything to do today. It’s also been a while since you played altogether.
But, you’ve never been over at Kenma’s.
“Is it okay with him?” It might be Kuroo’s idea. You don’t want to impose.
“Kenma! You don’t mind, right?” You hear Kenma but couldn’t make out what he said.
“Yep. He said it was fine. I’ll text you the address.”
You drive to the address he gave you. He said to just enter, so you did. You follow Kuroo’s loud voice to locate them. You open the door where you hear his voice from. Both of them take their eyes away from the screen to see who entered.
“Look who’s back from the dead.” You don’t want to admit it but it was nice to see his usual grin.
“Missed me, Kuroo?” You tease back.
The two-week break did you some good. You’re back to how you are with each other, in your part at least. No weirdness involved.
“Hey Kenma.” you give him a warm smile. He greets back with a curt nod.
“So what’re we playing?” You sit beside Kuroo.
“I wanna race y.n.” Kenma says.
“Ooh. That means you’re in my seat, Kuroo.”
“Fine,” he unwillingly hands you the controller.
You switch places. Kenma goes to his disc collection and looks for the game you’re going to play.
“By the way y.n., aren’t you going to congratulate me?”
“For what?”
Pride shines on his face. “Hehe. I’ve passed all my subjects. I’m officially graduating this semester.”
You gape at him in astonishment. You know he’s a Senior, but you thought he’s going to graduate next semester, not this one.
“Whoa. I- uh.” You don’t know how to react. Should you hug him? Shake his hand? Kiss him?
Wait, what? You shake your head. Kenma’s here. No indecencies allowed.
“But why aren’t you celebrating?” you ask.
“I did already. I was gonna invite you actually, but you weren’t answering my texts,” he says it casually, but his face is serious.
It‘s nice of him to want to invite you to celebrate such a milestone in his life. Maybe you really are actual friends despite being shagmates. Now you feel bad for ignoring him because you felt strange around him lately.
“Um sorry. I didn’t know.” you apologize awkwardly while looking away. Your face lights up when you think of a way to make it up to him.
“Do you want anything in particular as a grad gift?”
“You can ask for that newly released game” Kenma quickly answers from across the room. You laugh when Kuroo makes a face.
“Hey. I’m the one she’s asking.”
Kenma returns to his seat and starts the game.
“Think about it while we play,” you say.
He doesn’t seem to be thinking though. While you’re racing with Kenma, Kuroo keeps on taunting you to beat Kenma. He abandons sitting and moves behind you.
“Left, left. GO LEFT!” With his hands on your shoulders, he nudges your upper body to the left as you swerve through a curve. You two are in sync in movement which adds to your excitement. You go through two nitrous while Kenma slips on a banana.
“Bye Kenmaaaa” you can’t help but egg him on. You’re grinning so hard your cheeks are starting to hurt. You’re almost at the finish line. Finally, you can beat Kenma at something on the first try.
“Haha! Good one, kitten.”
You go rigid. You glance at Kenma to see his reaction. He’s still focused on the game. Hopefully, he didn’t hear. When you return your eyes on the screen, you hit a shell. You slow down while Kenma gets back to being first. You do your best to catch up, but he’s already at the finish line.
“So close.” you groan in frustration. You could’ve won if Kuroo wasn’t such an idiot.
“Heh. My turn.”
“Don’t you need to be somewhere tonight?” Kenma asks Kuroo.
He looks at the time. “It’s way too early,” then he stills for a second before sitting beside you again.
“I know what I want y.n.” His smile tells you upfront that he’s up to something. You ready yourself for what it is.
“Come with me tonight.”
“Where? What for?”
“We have this batch graduation party at a hotel. We’re allowed a +1.”
“Uhh. Why me?”
“Cause you’re pretty.” Kenma says in a nonchalant manner.
“Not just pretty. You’re way hot. My batchmates will be jealous of me nyehahaha.” You just stare at his animated state of idiocy.
“Sorry about him y.n.” When you look at Kenma, he shares the same expression you have.
“Won’t you get bored if I’m there?”
“Nah. I planned to go alone before asking you.”
“Why not ask Kenma?”
“Pass.” Kenma says too quickly.
“That’s why.” Kuroo confirms.
“Don’t you want anything else? I can get you anything.” You try to negotiate something else that you can buy for him.
“That’s too easy for you. And I don’t really need anything.”
You exhale heavily while rubbing your face.
“Okay, sure.” You grumble.
“Yes!” He laughs maniacally.
To be honest, you’re a little uncomfortable about this. You’re sure people will think you’re dating. Ugh. Whatever. Since he asked for it as a gift, you’ll give it to him just this time.
“I’m thirsty. Does anyone want water?” Kuroo suddenly stands up and heads to the kitchen.
“I’m good,” you say while Kenma just shakes his head.
“So,” Kenma spoke as soon as Kuroo left the room. You turn to him.
“Kitten, huh?”
Your whole body tenses up. He heard it! You have no excuse this time. You feign innocence and smile so fake that it’s making you cringe. Kenma’s smarter than you thought. If he pulled this off before Kuroo asked you, you wouldn’t have agreed to it.
Wait. He’s also the one who reminded Kuroo of the event even though it’s still early in the afternoon. Did he do that deliberately because he knew Kuroo’s going to ask you in that instance?
Ugh.
You know that Kuroo is very perceptive, but Kenma’s just on a different level that it’s almost scary.
“I think I’m gonna get some water too.” You make your escape to the kitchen and give Kuroo some verbal beating.
Maybe he should’ve gone together with you. It’s been thirty minute since he got there. He’s even late, but he still hasn’t heard from you.
He takes out his phone to call you, but his thumb stops when he sees his outgoing calls history. It was mostly your number from the amount of times he’s called you from the past two weeks. They were all missed though. You never answered him.
Admittedly, he was worried when you were ignoring his texts and calls. That’s why you had to use Kenma’s phone to check up on you because he has no idea where you live.
Of course, neither of you is obligated to reply or show up to each other, but he does care more than a fuck buddy should. It wouldn’t hurt for you to take 5 seconds to reply to his texts. What bothered him the most is that maybe he went overboard with the teasing and pissed you off for real.
He’s glad that you seemed normal this afternoon. You were actually nice to have thought of giving him something for graduation. He didn’t think that you would. You even agreed to be his date tonight. He didn’t exactly phrase it that way earlier because you might feel off with the word ‘date’.
Instead of calling you, he sends a text message to know where you are.
Someone puts a hand on his shoulders. “Hey Kuroo. Are you with someone tonight?” It’s Reiji, a batchmate with the same major.
“Hell yeah I am.” The confidence in his voice makes Reiji curious. “Where is she?”
“Running late,” he answers thriftly. Reiji nods his head and looks around. Reiji suddenly stands up straight and shakes his arm violently.
“Someone brought a hottie. Look!” Reiji continues to shake his arm to urge him to look at said hottie. He doesn’t care though. He looks at his phone to see if you’ve replied.
“I swear, Kuroo. She looks like a freaking model.” The word ‘model’ didn’t go unheard. He instantly turns to the direction Reiji was looking.
Reiji is a fucking tool. You aren’t just hot. You look absolutely divine. You’re wearing a crimson dress that hugged your marvelous figure. It goes just above your knees, but there’s a knot on both sides that hitches the dress higher to show just the right amount of skin on your gorgeous thighs. It has flimsy straps that highlight your neck and shoulders.
The only time he saw you with makeup was the night you met, and that was only lipstick. Tonight, a glossy shade of peach is tinted on your lips. You’re wearing eyeliner that’s intricately drawn, giving your eyes that sultry look.
You’re also wearing heels which makes you stand out even more.
The most captivating of all is how you carry yourself. You are not overdressed in any way. The clothes are just right for the hotel setting. It’s the way you walk with finesse while occasionally glancing at corners that makes you look like royalty who’s checking on her subjects.
Others are also staring, but you don’t seem to notice or maybe you don’t mind at all.
Your eyes finally meet his. He suddenly feels nervous. He has all the cockiness, but he can’t muster any right now. You look down for a while and tuck your hair behind your ears. Then you give him a coy smile before you approach him. Ah fuck.
“What the- Did she just smile at you?!” His lips form a lopsided smile as his ego swells up. He pats Reiji twice. “Sorry dude. That hottie is with me.” He puts his hands on his pockets. He raises both eyebrows and gives Reiji a meaningful look before marching to meet you.
He puts a hand on your shoulder when you’re within reach. The stares that were previously on you are now shared between you two.
“You’re late,” he says in a hushed voice.
“Deliberately, of course. Now everyone knows the pretty girl is with you. Be a little thankful.” You respond in the same manner while giving him a pleasant smile for everyone to see.
You really are a sly one. His hand goes to your waist and leads you to his friends. He introduces you as a special friend of his. He gives them vague answers when they ask if you guys are dating. You ride with it. You don’t just nod when there’s a conversation. You actually join in it and keep up with what’s going on.
There’s a time when he had to leave you for a while because a professor from his department asked him about his plans after graduation. He doesn’t prolong the conversation because someone might hog you.
He excuses himself and finds you giggling with his batchmates. He smiles to himself. You really kept your end of the bargain. You aren’t just the hot chick, you also have wits to boot.
He goes back to your side. “Sorry folks, but I’m getting her back.”
“Whaat? Cmon.” He hears more grumbles of disagreement, but he doesn’t care. He wants you to himself now. You smile politely to them and bows your head. “Nice to meet you guys.”
“C’mon.” He guides you out of the hall. “Where are we going?”
“Just follow me.”
He goes in an elevator and presses the highest button.
“I have to say. I didn’t think you’d cooperate this well.”
You sneer at his indirect praise. “I’m an amazing trophy girl, aren’t I?”
He nods approvingly and claps slowly. “Brilliant honestly.”
You punch him playfully on the arm.
The elevator dings and reveals the rooftop. He lets you go first and follows. The floor is amazing. The lights are warm and there’s soft music playing in the background. The clear view of the city lights is the biggest attraction.
“Woooow,” the look of awe palpable on your eyes.
“Cool, right?” He asks, but you don’t answer. You just absorb the view in front of you. The breeze blows your hair gently, showing more of your profile.
“Don’t you want to sit? Your feet must hurt from those shoes.”
You shake your head. “Not really. I’m used to it. I’ve stood and walked in heels for long periods of time.”
“From work?”
“And family. I’m also their trophy girl sometimes.”
He looks for any hint of sadness but you say that as a matter of fact only. On the contrary, you look back at him with warmth in your eyes.
“Congratulations Kuroo.” The smile he sees is like the one he saw when he cooked for you. He’s a bit moved that you are truly happy for his achievement.
“Thank you.” He returns the sincerity.
You both enjoy the silence and the twinkling lights laid before you. The soft music in the background is the only sound audible presently.
“Come here.” He grabs you by your wrist and pulls you close. He puts your arms around his nape.
“What’re you doing?” You struggle a bit from his grip.
“My gift still hasn’t ended, right?” He outsmarts you, yet again. You blink twice and heave.
“You’re really milking this, aren’t you?”
He wraps his arms arounds your waist when you stop resisting. He starts swaying slowly, following the rhythm of the song. He revels in the feeling of your body pressed to him. The natural thing to do would be to whisk you away from here, take you to his place, and bang you wildly. But that’s not what he wants right now. This. This is enough for him for now. Having you this close gives him unspeakable contentment.
He lifts your chin with a finger so you’ll look at him. He returns his arm to your waist once you’ve locked eyes.
“You really look beautiful tonight.” He finally tells you. You’re too gorgeous not to let you know.
You blink twice at him with your mouth a few centimeters apart. The make-up doesn’t hide the subtle pink shade that suddenly glowed on your cheeks. Lovely. He won’t miss this opportunity.
He swiftly dips down just to stop with his lips a few inches from yours. He can feel you completely tensed. The breath you’re holding is apparent.
“Relax, y.n.” His one hand climbs to your back to caress it, ushering you to ease up. When you loosen up, he claims your lips. When you melt in his arms in complete surrender, it’s enthralling. The warmth of your mouth against his is too good for words. He can’t get enough. You open your mouth letting him slip in his tongue. He adores how you reciprocate with the same passion.
Your right hand travels from his nape to his chest. How this is still non-sexual is beyond him. He can kiss you like this all night.
The ring of laughter that echoed in the air breaks the enchanted bubble you two were just in. A group of people enters the floor. You get away from him hastily.
“We should go.” You tell him while avoiding his gaze. You make your way to the elevator without waiting for him. One of the girls who just came in lingers her eyes at your face. You ignore it and get in the elevator. Kuroo goes right after you.
When the elevator closes, you see your reflection. Your lipgloss was smudged all over. No wonder the girl was staring. You hurriedly get a napkin from your purse to wipe it off.
“Can I take my gift home?” You don’t know if it’s you or his voice lacks the regular egotism it has. You still steer clear of looking at him so you can’t see his face.
You still haven’t recovered. No one has kissed you like that. It was agonizingly delicate but ardent. It felt like drowning but floating at the same time. You can still feel your heart pounding at your chest.
You laugh timidly to shake it off. You need to get back to your cheeky self before he notices.
“Sorry, but the gift is getting tired.” You do your best to look normal when you finally face him.
“I’ll drive you home then.” You want to refuse, but it would be weird. You just told him you’re tired. It’d be obvious that you just want to get away from him.
You defeatedly give him your keys.
The ride to your place was spent in silence. You close your eyes to straighten your mind. It was nothing. That was just a regular make out session done in a very romantic setting. It’s probably completely normal for him, so it should be for you too.
“I’ll let you borrow the car so you don’t have to take a cab home.” You interrupt the stillness. “You don’t have to. It’s still early anyways.”
“Consider it a consolation since you can’t take the gift home.” You did it. You said something your usual self would.
“I’d rather take the gift itself, so no.” Damn it. Just when you thought you’ve regained your sass, he instantly shoots it down. You’re almost at your place.
“Holy shit. You live at Roppongi Hills?!” He says out of the blue. Oh right. You’ve never let him drive you home. You didn’t see the need for him to know where you live. You’re also wary of your privacy. You completely forgot about that because of what happened earlier.
“Parking is over there.”
He stops the engine when he finds a spot. You get out of your car immediately.
“Thanks for driving me home. Night.” You greet dryly.
“I want to see your place at least.”
“Buy why?” You whine in frustration. You just want to lie in bed and distract yourself from any thoughts about him.
“Oh y.n. You’ve been keeping me out since day 1. Now that we’re here, can’t you spare this unfortunate man a peek?” He laments dramatically.
His acting is so bad that your laugh echoed at the corners of the parking lot. God, his humor really gets you. You speak when you catch your breath, “A peek it is then, unfortunate man.” Finally, you feel the air between you two clear up.
He follows you when you go inside the building.
“Good evening, maam.” Ths security guard bows as he greets you.
“He’s with me,” referring to Kuroo. “Good evening, sir,” he greets Kuroo as well.
When you’re out of earshot, he says, “Sometimes I forget how ridiculously rich you are. Maybe I should start calling you milady or somethin.”
“Call me ‘Mistress,’ you lowly servant,” you say jokingly.
His eyebrow and the corner of his mouth both shoot up at the same time. “So you’re into that, huh?”
“I was kidding of course!”
“Let me stay and I’d serve you all night, y.n.”
The right response would be to ask him how he plans to serve you exactly. But you panic instead, the thought of even kissing him again makes you nervous like crazy. Crap, you’re really losing it. You pray that you aren’t blushing.
“Tough luck, Kuroo. I just want to lie down and do nothing for the night.” You bring the conversation back to normal before it escalates into something that involves you and him having any intimate contact.
When you get to your unit, you let him in. You keep the door open. You don’t want to be enclosed here with him in it. The last thing you need is him tainting your place. You don’t want to wake up and realize that he’s had his way with you on your own bed.
His eyes survey every corner, looking very impressed at the interior. “Daaamn. My place is shit compared to this.”
You check your phone. Five minutes from now, you’re kicking him out.
“You can get your water in the fridge if you want.” You mentally praise yourself for keeping the conversation light and breezy.
“Left or right?”
You sigh loudly. You make your way to your kitchen. Halfway through, you hear your door creak. Oh no. You hear it thud close.
“Say y.n., what should I do so I can stay here tonight?” Despite the huge space, you feel trapped. His eyes are intensely piercing on you. You gulp to clear the build-up of nerves that blocked your throat.
“Y-You just can’t.” How dare you stutter!
As he takes his steps to cross the distance between you, you grow even more fidgety. You want to step back, run away even. If he pulls off the same stunt on the rooftop earlier, you don’t know if you can hold back the unwanted feelings you’ve been disregarding recently. You’ve been pushing them at the back of your head, telling yourself excuses, and convincing yourself that it’s nothing. And until tonight, you were successful.
You don’t want to have feelings for Kuroo. You won’t be able to handle the complexity of the situation that would arise.
You waver when he gently strokes your cheek.
“Hey,” he says it so gently that your eyes reach for his, pulled in by the magnetism of his voice.
They hold the same mellow tenderness they had while ago. He’s never been like this with you. Only tonight.
Maybe he - no. You shouldn’t delude yourself like that. This can go very bad for you if you make a mistake. You’ll end up falling for someone who enjoys only the sex and company, nothing more. What you’ve been feeling since you left the hotel is fear. You’ve been repressing all these thoughts and they’ve built up to this situation. You are now in a sitch wherein you’re scared that if he makes his move, you’ll be too powerless to stop yourself.
He lowers his head, closing in inch by inch. Too close for comfort. His lips go past yours and lands on your cheek. It’s only a soft peck.
“I really liked your gift,” he says with authenticity, then lets you go.
He heads for the door. Your eyes absent-mindedly trail him as he exits.
“Good night, y.n” He winks and closes your door.
You go to your bed and sit. Your eyes are fixated at the wall while your brain tries to make out what just happened. You stuff your face in a pillow and squeal with frustration. Who are you kidding?
Kiss or no kiss, you fell for him.
Part 3 | Part 5 | m.list 
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arch-venus25 · 3 years
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The Head and the Heart, Part 4
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Hello everyone,
I submitted this for @just-the-hiddles‘s The Damnit Jim, I’m A Vampire, Not A Landlord Fic Frenzy.
This chapter is less action heavy, but just as important. Thanks for hanging in there and reading!
Series Masterlist: The Head and The Heart
Summary: The twins are taking a night off from their graduate studies-- or at least Tessa is; her twin sister, Antha, is just trying to keep her out of trouble. What starts as a night of good old-fashioned fun and flirting quickly changes as they find themselves at the doorstep of the Hollow House Bed and Breakfast.
Characters: OFCs Antha and Tessa King, original characters/vampires
WARNINGS: 18+ for suggestive themes and violence, cursing, implied drug use, implied rape, stressful/scary situations, vampires, and characters with incredible hair-- you’ve been warned. Read at your own discretion.
Word Count: 3812
Part Four: The Aftermath
           The weathered professor seemed very confused but stood her ground and insisted, “Miss King, take the summer off.”
           “I just need a week, that’s all—and then I’ll get the methodology section to you—Dr. Watts I just need another week, please!” Antha pushed back. Dr. Watts set her glasses on her desk and then waved her over to a deep-tufted-leather sofa.
           “Antha,” her voice lowered, “I’ve known you for what—five years? You don’t become a valedictorian because you don’t like to write. You have been moody these past few weeks, you barely passed the final exam, and you’ve pushed back the thesis methodology three times. Last class, you were so distracted I would have rather you skipped. I know you, talk to me, what’s going on?”
           “My sister and I had a Friday night out with some friends and something happened.” Antha murmured, staring down at her feet.
           “Friday nights aren’t what they used be; did you hear about the fight that broke out at that dive bar off of—oh, what’s it called? You know the place—well, it was all over the news,” she paused gravely, “you weren’t there were you?”
           The twin nodded slowly. She felt overwhelmed in front of her advisor. She pinched the bridge of her nose and squeezed her eyes shut before replying. “Tessa’s date got into a fight with an old flame, it was a whole thing. But after…” She couldn’t continue. The advisor took her hand gently.
           “Did someone hurt you?”
           Antha’s eyes welled and all she could do was stare. As if she said the words out loud, it would become more true than it already was. The doctor’s forehead wrinkled as her brows gathered together. Having lived through the revolutions of the sixties and the proceeding struggle for equality, Dr. Watts knew the dangers women faced. She didn’t need an answer; she just wanted to offer shelter to a young woman. She knew just from looking at her student that whatever happened, it was beyond words.
           “You’re taking the summer and fall semester off—or at the very least take the summer off and go to a student counselor; its free, it comes with your tuition, so please use it. If you need anything you know you and your sister can come to me.” She wrote down her personal number and one for the counselors’ office. Antha held the little shred of stationary. She promised she would do just that.
        Shortly after, she left her advisor’s office and floated through the campus green and then waited by the bus stop. Her feet told her she was going home, yet her attention was somewhere far away. What can I say to a counselor? Who would understand what we saw at Hollow House? Without realizing, she had retrieved something from her pocket; she stared dumfounded at the pewter-colored iris that gleamed back.
        Antha couldn’t get rid of it. But in a moment of frustration, she chucked the marble-like eye into a nearby drain. She returned to her spot and tried to focus on scheduling a counselor. Moving forward, that’s what I need, she figured.
        A familiar wheezing crawled up the street. The sluggishness of a muffler that had seen better days filled her ears as she dazed at the phone number-laden scrap paper.  “—Antha!” Someone yelled. To her surprise she peered up to see Doug hanging out of his rusty Buick, looking just as timid as ever. He seemed anxious, for what reason she didn’t know. “I’ve been calling your name. You’ve gone deaf ol’ girl—you want a ride?” He asked with forced humor in his voice. She watched him blankly as his expression fell. “You alright?”
        Antha thought about it and suddenly felt stupid. All of her gusto about moving forward had evaporated; she lamely shook her head like a weary child. She felt like a little girl in a world that was too big for her. It all just seemed too much.
        The July swelter didn’t let up even with the windows down. The two didn’t speak as they made their way to their favorite pizza joint. Thrilled to be out of the unairconditioned Buick’s steel embrace, they collapsed into the far back booth of the pizzeria. All the servers knew it was Doug and Antha’s spot; they habitually kept it clean and empty, knowing they would eventually roll in. They made it to the “golden hour”. The sacred three hours between the lunch and dinner rush. It was their favorite time.
        “Whatchas want?” The straggly blue-haired waitress chewed her bubblegum like a goat.
        “The usual—uh hold on—when did you eat last?” Doug asked. Antha shrugged and realized she didn’t know. She couldn’t even think that far back. “Can we get a double order of the usual? But make two of them to-go?” The waitress didn’t even answer as she went to get drinks. “You want to talk about it?”
           “Nope. I said everything already.” Antha wasn’t mad at him, she was just tired. She was more annoyed that he would ask about the matter and then dispute the realism of what she explained. Doug grumbled when the waitress slopped the pitcher and straws down, vanilla coke-a-cola splashing everywhere.
           “—Hey, don’t we get like a punch-card or something? You know, for every hundred pizzas we buy, we get the next one free?” He politely suggested, his way of being confrontational. He was growing exasperated with the women in his life; he didn’t mind taking it from his close friends, Zoey and the twins, but he was having none of this waitress. She paused, chewed her gum, and left again.
           “Whoa, cool off killer,” Antha snarked, her spirits lifting with each sip of her fountain soda. She looked him over and thought on their friendship for a moment as he griped about that one particular server.
        Doug was a shy, lanky, ginger-bearded young man. He was passionate about things and supportive of the people he loved, but didn’t reserve much attention for the people outside of that parameter. He lived in vintage band t-shirts, had friendly light eyes, and a funny smile. No one could resist his unkempt wolfish hair or his corny sense of humor; he had a way of growing on a person. But he always showed up, his guitar in tow. That’s why Antha didn’t fight him when he asked about that night; she knew he actually cared and was trying his best to understand. He couldn’t help her though. No one could help.
        “How about we hang out this weekend, do a barbeque? Nobody grills a burger like you—and Tessa can make her sangria, huh, what do you think?” He tried to turn the conversation to open her up.
        “Uhh… I don’t know. I can’t plan that far ahead, I’m real busy.” She declined. The sausage pizzas arrived faster than expected and Doug dropped slices on their plates.
        “Busy yeah? Mmm-hmmm,” he bit into his slice, cheese tangling in his five o’clock shadow, “busy not writing your thesis, not eating, and not sleeping? Ant, the last time I saw you eat was a few days ago when I brought pizza over. You gonna talk to me?”
        Antha sighed loudly and glared at him. She was worn-through with the people in her life too. I’m too tired for this shit, she thought. She pushed her plate forward and abandoned her half-eaten slice. He saw her mild protest and his cheeks tinged pink. They silently stared each other down, him chewing as loud as he could manage while she obnoxiously slurped her soda in reply.
        Before they could hash out their issues a patron burst through the front entrance. “Hey—hic—you seen Ant? Where she at? The back?” Tessa was hiccupping and talking all sorts of loud, like she was in a club on a Saturday night. “Oh hey girls!” She pointed at the staff and sashayed herself to the booth; her bedazzled sandals slapping the linoleum like a jackhammer in the quiet place. The front door jingled again and in rushed Zoey.
        “I’m sorry,” she apologized to the front of the house and then chased after Tessa. “I picked her up because she was texting me weird messages—I thought I could calm her down with something to eat.” She explained to the table as she took a seat next to Doug.
        “I already ate today.” Tessa insisted, sliding in next to her sister and almost toppling over a pizza.
        “Oh yeah, what did you have for lunch?” Doug asked, his patience wearing thin.
        “GIN and uh—” she had to think about it but excitedly rebounded, “and uh water ice. Breakfast of champions!” Tessa thought she was quite funny, regardless how everyone else disagreed.
        “How about we have a little slice of pi—” Doug pandered but she wasn’t going to hear any of it.
        “Now who would put sausage on a pizza? Oh, no. I have enough meat in my life—you know what I’m sayin’ Zo—you feel me?” She howled.
        “That’s cute.” Doug’s patience officially went on vacation as of that second. He tore the sausage off some of the pie and then thrust the mangled slice in front of the drunk twin. “There ya’ go, just cheese—And you eat your damn slice too! This has gone on long enough—we’re going to have a barbeque and chill like we always do! It’s Fourth of July this weekend, did you know that?” He directed at the other twin.
        “This white boy’s hollering at you, oh lord…” Tessa cackled; her cheese dripped down the side of the table as she reached for some ice chips from an empty cup. Zoey was mortified and motioned to Antha for help, her friend was out of control.
        “Yeah—well this boy’s about tired of this foolishness! I don’t know all of what’s happened that night, but neither one of you will talk to me about it! Ant you’ve been practically dead, a walking zombie for three weeks—and Tessa, it’s three o’clock in the afternoon, what the hell has gotten into you?”
        “Gin.” She giggled.
        “Hey Katy? Can we get all this to go, with some two liters?” He yelled across the full length of the restaurant.
        Zoey handled the food transport as Doug buckled the twins into his car. He mumbled to himself, “…goddamn vampires my ass…” as he cleared his fogging glasses. Tessa began to mildly complain about the heat when the car stopped at a red light. They all noticed a young man struggling to get into a car at the gas station across the way.
        “Is that José?” She whispered. They witnessed his mother trying to steady him, juggling his crutches and searching for a spot on him that wasn’t bandaged. Adorned in a neck brace, shoulder sling, full posterior elbow splint, and full left leg cast. Poor José appeared like he faced-off with a combine. Doug glared at the girls in his rear-view mirror. The light turned green and not another word was said.
        He parked the Buick under the tree closest to the house and got the girls inside. Zoey did the same and brought the provisions to the shaded porch. It was too hot to do anything other than sit around by the fan or stay in the AC. Tessa went to her room when they got in; she felt awful about what she had seen at the gas station.
        They worked together to set up the tall pedestal fan on the porch, because the porch fan just couldn’t combat Mother Nature alone. They were in the midst of dawdling about when Antha accidentally fell asleep on the porch swing while Doug played the guitar. Zoey elicited his help inside to leave Antha to nap. The two were shocked with the state of things.
        Momma’s house was a frightful mess. They never saw it in its condition before: Dishes with dust, articles of clothing haphazardly dropped, laundry either half started or half done, it was difficult to tell. “Momma would roll over, I swear…” Zoey whispered. They agreed to tidy up while the twins rested, lest Momma rise up and haunt them. That woman was meticulous and was not above coming back from the grave to tell everyone what’s-what.
        As if life had been frozen in time from the month prior. The twin’s incident hit like a meteor and their friends now saw the wreckage. While they hadn’t admitted it out loud, they had stopped living too; obsessed with what happened that night at Hollow House. Grasping for a truth that they couldn’t reach.
        The overloaded dishwasher whined as it cycled and it reminded Doug of seeing José, busted up and struggling. That’s what really happens after a bar-brawl. There’s always a winner and always a loser. He half-heartedly swept the floor and thought to himself: these are the parts they edit from movies. The aftermath. The guns, the glory, the blood all made the cut; but the estranged motions we go through to try and find the thread leading back to our lives doesn’t. These are the quiet moments without answers, like loose ends dangling.
        Zoey crept into the kitchen and signaled for him to follow her to the porch. She had just hung the last load of laundry on the line for the afternoon. They were both beat and sweat through from cleaning. They shimmied the big metal ice bucket to the front, fearing they’d disturb Antha. She was so far gone that an earthquake couldn’t wake her. They popped two well-earned beers and exchanged the bits and pieces of what they learned from the twins over the past few weeks.
        “…that’s crazy, right? Like there’s no way what Tessa told me could be real, right? Did someone roofie their drinks?” Zoey asked him as she tied his wavy hair into a top-knot.
        “I’m just worried that something happened they won’t say, like they’re traumatized—I mean, Zo, I was driving to the bar and I seen them covered in blood on the side of the road. Tessa was screaming in the ER that a vampire attacked her sister—and then Antha all of a sudden, calms her down and explains to the doctors that they were lost in the woods, came upon the bed and breakfast for help, and that a strange man assaulted them there. Said they used a fireplace poker in defense, bloodied him up real good, and they escaped to the main road.” Doug took a swig of beer to recuperate.
        He was getting worked up just relaying the story, “But the cops, they investigated that place and found six bodies—slaughtered—in the basement, two of them the owners. The bodies had been sitting there for days before the twins got to ‘em. I’m scared that maniac’s out there. I mean—I’m scared in my own damn apartment when I think about it. What if they were found in that basement? What if we couldn’t find them?” He shook his head.
        “What can we do for them? Are there groups for people like this, who think they’ve seen something supernatural?” Zoey mused aloud as she pinned her jet-black pixie cut hair out of her face. The two pulled fresh beers out of the ice bucket and vowed to do some research after the weekend. They agreed their first goal was to get the twins fed and cared for.
        They watched the sun set into folds of purple, pink, and orange over the high grass. The heat of the day receded with the light, but the humidity persisted only to remind them that it was an intermission; the threat remained that the summer’s full force would return at tomorrow’s dawn.
        The grasshoppers were summoned as Doug strummed his guitar, not truly playing anything particular. Zoey brought out cards to shuffle, waiting on Tessa to play. The evening began to set in peacefully until a rumble cut through the twilight.
        A huge pickup truck barreled down the long drive and parked in front of the house. Out jumped the infamous Flake. His blond hair contrasted against the lavender sky, budding starlight glinting off his aviator sunglasses, and a tooth pick in the corner of his mouth completed his redneck-chic visage. He swaggered up to the porch and was met with a startled Antha; she had jumped up like a viper at the sound of his wheels. He donned a large patch like bandage over half an eye and his hands were wrapped too.
        “Tessa around?” Franco didn’t even offer small talk which had Antha go straight from just waking up to furious.
        “Not for you.”
“Well, I wanted to check in on her—haven’t been able to call on account of that scuffle at the bar. Them boys got my tires and my phone.”
        “Looks like they got your eye too.” She scoffed.
        “Yep,” he laughed and pulled his sunglasses down to reveal those piercing big blues, “you should see the other guy.”
        “We did.” Her disdain seemed to suck the air out of the whole yard. Franco leaned on the porch banister and pulled a smoke from behind his ear. Her eyes burned so hot on him she could have lit his cigarette.
        “I can see you’re not much for visitors, so I’ll just leave this. If you could give it to Tessa, I’d be mighty grateful.” He handed her a number, but she walked away not even considering it. Zoey jumped up and took the note. “Night ya’ll.” Franco flicked his butt into the yard and made his way back to his truck.
        Long after he left and the noise of his truck faded Antha sat, her arms crossed, on the porch swing. Her friends idled by, every so often glancing in her direction waiting for her to speak her mind. The disgruntled twin couldn’t connect the pieces of her dislike for Franco. It wasn’t as simple as his jeans were too torn, his truck too loud, or his gaze too heavy; it was the fact that she knew nothing about him. No one did. Where did he come from—and where was he going? It didn’t add up to Antha that he was the first hillbilly she ever met without a tan. What working man doesn’t have a farmer’s tan? Finally, after a good twenty-five minutes of contemplation Antha announced, “I need a drink.” With a flutter of Zoey’s sundress, she presented a liter of honey whiskey, lemon wedges, and shot glasses.
        A few shots and some pizza in her stomach, Antha started to feel somewhat whole. The four-hour nap revived her a bit, or least lessened the haze she had been wading through. She could finally take in her surroundings: she was lucky to have her friends. When the mosquitos really started to bite they brought their party inside and relished the cool—and now clean—house. “I don’t know what I’d do without you two, I’m sorry I can’t,” she paused, “I just can’t right now.” Before Antha could work out her sentiment the queen bee descended from her room.
        “That’s it! I have decided!” Tessa announced, thumping down the stairs like a sentinel charge. “I’m going to visit José tomorrow—even though it’s not my fault he got his ass beat, I still think it’s only fair to show love.” She waited, her hands on her hips, for their unyielding approval or preferably a round of applause.
        “Look at you growing a conscious,” was the general consensus of the other three. Tessa saucily tossed her braids as she dusted her shoulders. They all scooted into the kitchen table and fed her dinner. Just like a heart, she had a way of pulsing life into a room. Before they knew it, they were swapping stories like always.
        Tessa was laughing and teasing Doug when she took a shot. She threw her empty glass down on the table as was customary, but when the glass met the table it then clinked as if something had been dropped into it. They all sat forward to see a silvery-gray eye in the bottom.
        “Did you just spit that in there?” Doug’s eyes were wide.
        The twins beheld each other knowingly.
        In the beginning, they initially freaked out over the eyes returning. Now it became a sickening fascination of what they could do to them. The eyes always returned. They burned them, they drowned them, and they threw them away; every time the eyes returned to the twins.
        “I tried to tell you, but you’re not listening,” Antha began, “these eyes are following us. Ever since we killed that thing at Hollow House, we’ve had them.” Doug and Zoey’s faces were pained in disbelief.
        “Here.” Tessa got up roughly and held the eye over the sink. She turned on the garbage disposal and dropped it in; it made a grotesque metal sound and then after a few rotations, crunched like glass. Antha showed the eye that was always in her back pocket and explained she threw it away in a drain across town earlier that day. She threw hers in too, directly into the disposal.
        “Well, how long does it take for them to come back?” Zoey asked.
        “They’re not coming back—this is a trick!” Doug looked like an angry leprechaun with his reddened face and stubble. The twins’ faces didn’t even shift with the accusation.
        “Sometimes its seconds, sometimes hours, or a day. It doesn’t matter, they’ll be back.” Antha confirmed and the twins took their seats at the table. The room became solemn as Tessa popped another round of beers and poured a flight of shots for them all, knowing the liquid courage was needed. Doug jumped up from his seat and began checking under cushions, searching cupboards, and drawers. The girls sat back and waited as he processed.
        He huffed, “…you got back-ups, or hiding ‘em somewhere—I don’t know why you’re playing with me right now…it’s not funny…” But then a loud plop sounded on the kitchen table, like a golf ball dropped from the ceiling. He turned to watch a second oversized marble drop seemingly out of thin air. He returned to the table and gawked at the two eyes sitting in front of the twins. “You got to tell us what happened at Hollow House.” Doug’s voice was hushed as he shakily accepted the whiskey shot from Tessa. In unison they saluted and threw back the shots with beer chasers.
        While the four friends went over the sordid events, in gruesome detail, a mysterious figure watched from the unlit porch window. The uninvited guest crept off through the yard, down the dirt-path driveway, and made a phone call:
        “They got them eyes,” it reported, “I reckon there’ll be a war.”
Twinning Taglist: If you want to be added or removed just let me know; please share with anyone that might be interested. I would love any and all feedback so I can learn and become a better writer. Thank you!  I tagged some people that I thought would be interested in this. @myoxisbroken​ @just-the-hiddles​ @vodka-and-some-sass​ @nildespirandum​ @yespolkadotkitty​ @latent-thoughts​ @emeraldrosequartz​ @villainousshakespeare​ @hopelessromanticspoonie​ @caffiend-queen​ @poetic-fiasco​ @lokimostly​ @dianamolloy​ @marvelgirlonamarvelworld​ @brightsunanddarkmidnight2-0​ @cateyes315​ @mooncat163​ @nuggsmum​ @myraiswack​​​ @wolfpawn​​ @plastic-heart​​ @confusednerd09​
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ah-kasuna · 4 years
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Puppetry in a Nutshell // ♥ I ♥
Pairing: SasoDei
AU: Art School
THIS IS THE 1ST PART AND MY VERY 1ST TRANSLATION ;_; I ain’t native speaker, so there will be mistakes I think, so please let me know about them, so I could fix em! Tbh it feels like doin it with the blindfold on, so XD Yeah, forgive me anyway. 
I hope you’ll like it!♥ Let me know what you think please! Love ya!
AND I DEDICATE IT TO @deidaraakasuna, U KNOW WHY♥♥♥
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Geidai.
The world-famous Fine Arts Academy, located in one of the most charming corners of Tokyo. 
A place that growing artists dream about, perceiving it as a mystical land of inspiration and creativity (until they see sculpture students playing with their own Pony ponies). 
The university to get to is a high-class feat, usually drenched in liters of alcohol and liters of tears in a later hangover. After all, who wouldn't get drunk on this occasion? 
I smiled at the vague memories as I unpacked my breakfast and shook my head fondly. Basically, this sentimental feeling of being an old woman with a bunch of grandchildren has accompanied me since the beginning of my sophomore year, when I watched the freshmen roaming the corridors in sweet ignorance of their fate. Fortunately or not, this intoxicating state faded into non-existent at the end of the first semester as the session approached. And it just so happened that it was just approaching, breaking the will to fight along the way and magically depriving the students of creative inspiration, the one necessary - as you can easily guess - to pass half a year at a group of charming leaders.
My gloomy eyes followed the classroom. Outside the corridor window, visible through the open door, a bird chirped merrily. The weather was beautiful - a typical Japanese spring. The cherries were blooming, scattering fragrant white-pink petals around, and I was rotting at the epicenter of All Evil, like a condemned man aware of what was about to happen. And which happened cyclically twice a week, because my goddamn ambition pushed me to apply for this equally damned university. And so I redeemed my sins before I died, regretting abandoning the idea of ​​self-improvement in the privacy of my modest (but equipped with a kettle and toaster!) Apartment. What more could you want?
I shoved a huge piece of bread in my mouth, which I chewed for five minutes before he graciously wanted to squeeze through my esophagus. A dry mouth like this meant only one thing: my brain finally picked up the information that puppetry classes were about to begin. For my despairing amusement, everyone was rushing to their seats, with shaking hands shoving paints, chisels, and the rest of the necessary utensils out of their bags, as if someone's life depended on the speed of their perfect arrangement on the table. I felt a sudden urge to laugh out loud.
If asked about the reason why the very thought of puppetry gave the vast majority of students sudden symptoms of delirium and depression, the answer would be simple, concise, and more eloquent than the potency pill ads: Hell Cerberus aka Sasori Akasuna. Officially - a lecturer in a terribly heavy and hated subject; in fact - the walking essence of the deepest pits of hell. What was it about him that wherever he went - everyone immediately cut off discussions and silly games? Well, the puppetry professor not only carefully nurtured the art of being laconic, cynical and ruthless. He was devilishly intelligent, even more talented and vindictive and possesive a tons of sophisticated sarcasm, which he liked to apply with the greatest pleasure to me. 
The bell rang. Everyone but me jumped up immediately and Akasuna entered the classroom. As always: in a perfectly matched shirt, elegant pants, a perfectly knotted tie and an equally perfect boredom on the face.
I reluctantly swallowed the rest of my bun, limiting myself to lazily lifting my ass off the chair and making a painful expression. Anyway, I was a loser at the outset, so I saw no point in putting on a similar play as the others, which only maked him sastisfied more. I clenched my fists automatically. Not this time, man!
The professor walked slowly towards the cathedral by stairs, giving the impression of a man who  scrupulously and deeply don't care for this worldly place and time. And perhaps I would even fall for his 'dun-give-a-shit' play, if I had not been marked by his hatred from the very first class. And yet, it's not like I did something to him, oh no. I was simply not susceptible to his mental puppet strings, so I stubbornly disagreed with him on the essence of the art. For him, the highest dimension of beauty were - horror of horrors - goofy make-uped puppets; for me, the art was much less crude carving in plastic materials, where every little movement could fix or spoil everything. And the wood? It was too patient, too tough, hard to work with, unresponsive to the tender touch of trained hands, and it had splinters ...
Everything happened according to the established order. Akasuna checked the attendance, gave an excruciatingly boring spiel about our laziness and talentlessness (noting that exams were coming up), and then had everyone make an individual puppet design. I groaned woefully like the rest of them, reluctantly reaching into my bag for a sketchbook and a set of pencils.
I loved nothing so much as wasting my time gouging dolls. To my left, a class idiot Tobi, wrapped in an orange and black scarf almost under his nose, looked at me as if I was a revelation of heavens.
"Don't even try," I said, feeling what was happening." We'll be kicked out both."
The guy made cat eyes, but said nothing more, and I went to work. I was drawing the lines in concentration, letting my mind wander along the definitely nice tracks, and in the end I turned off mind for good. And I would have been drawing in peace so I'd probably have finished this stupid task if that black-haired moron at the desk next to mine had not disturbed me with his grunts accompanying his neck stretching towards my work. 
It was the end of my composure. I lifted my head from the project and cursed him to the next five generation, supporting my words with a discreet but well-hit kick. There was a muffled groan.
"Kawamoto, shall you explain me what are you doing?" I immediately heard the distinctive, bored tone of his voice and stiffened on my chair. 
The professor was standing a few steps away from me, eyebrows raised and hands folded across his chest.
"Should I take you to the playground?"
"I'm trying to work, professor," I grunted, holding back the appropriate retort and wondering how the heck did he materialized at my desk.
"Good choice of words, indeed." The corner of his mouth curled up in a cynical smile. "Then be that kind and continue your trials in peace, unless you prefer to try at another university."
I felt my blood flooding. Tobi inhaled loudly, knowing what awaited him at the break, and Akasuna leisurely returned to the cathedral, occasionally glancing at me with hideous satisfaction.
I hated him. I hated him most sincerely and most earnestly, with particular emphasis on his physicality, which, despite the sadistic nature, made most of the female students' knees soften and their tongues tangled. Because exactly! He wasn't just a psychopath. He was a disgustingly handsome psychopath who was well aware of this fact and was not embarrassed to make use of it.
Unfortunately, it happened that he accidentaly found out about my moderate interest in the opposite sex, and from that moment he enjoyed torturing me with himself, perfectly guessing my preferences and weaknesses.
"May you rot in these shavings," I drawled under my breath, sticking a pencil on a blank sheet of paper and tracing a busty doll in a ballerina costume on it, with revenge paints 'Miss Sasori' on her exposed ass. And I would probably enjoy this piece of finest art until the end of the class, if I hadn't realized what my "blank sheet" was and why I just sentenced myself to death. I scribbled a porn image of the puppetry professor on the outline.
The bell rang.
"I would like to remind you that today we have the deadline for submitting the presentation plans to pass," his voice occurred to me as if through a fog.
Did I really hoped it would end well? With my heart pounding in the chest, I tore the rubber band out of my pocket, trying to erase the traces of my crime, as I caught above me the distinctive smell of his perfume.
"It was especially to you, Kawamoto," he announced icily, slipping the battered paper out from under my hands with a nimble movement. 
He attached it to the stack of papers he held, without even glaring at it, and left me sitting at the desk with a silent scream of terror on my face.
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emmagoldmanpapers · 6 years
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“Harvest Tidings“
Dear Emmassaries,
Though we are now in the dog days of summer, when the weather is — as Emma described it — “hot and sultry,” we look forward to cooler days ahead, when our wonderful student researchers return to campus from their travels. We’ve managed to find four talented work-study students who would be perfect for our final push to complete the volume. But we can only hire these students if we have the necessary funds for the next two semesters.
We need your help to ensure a plentiful harvest. Donate today so that we all may continue to enjoy the fruits of Emma’s labor. It’s easy!
Like the EGP Papers, Emma was always searching out the like-minded, seeking out supporters to build a people’s movement for social justice.
In 1906, she was struggling to fund the magazine Mother Earth. Though today this publication is an essential source of scholarship and inspiration, at the time, it was very much a labor of love — with an emphasis on labor. In an editorial written for the December 1906 issue, Emma reminisced: “Somebody has said that a Revolution would be impossible in July — ‘Mother Earth,’ too, suffered from the same cause, the revenue of the magazine largely depending on the sales at the various radical and liberal meetings, which are quite inactive during the Summer months. Thanks to the active interest of a few friends, however, I was enabled to fertilize the soil, hoping that with cooler weather would come the harvest. My expectations were amply justified. August, September and October brought a host of new subscribers and a great demand for single copies.” (For more, see vol. 2 of our series, Making Speech Free.)
The University expects us to raise $27,000 a month to cover all expenses — and avoid a termination — now set for August 31st. Every penny you contribute to the project helps to ensure our survival. There is still much work to be done. But it is our hope that August and beyond will bring us the support we need to complete this final volume of our documentary series — filled with insights that are not only pertinent to this historical moment, but also sorely needed.
Archivist Spotlight
We are still in hot pursuit of finally being able to officially hire our fabulous young archivist to help us prepare the archive for transfer. Alex earned her MLIS in 2014 from San Jose State University and has worked on archival and preservation projects with Paper Tiger Television, The Freedom Archives, Southern Exposure and the Bay Area Video Coalition. She is particularly interested in the documentation of radical histories, and also co-organizes an annual zine fest in the East Bay. With this great track record, Alex has been generously volunteering her time at the EGP for many years. We are lucky to have her and would like to reciprocate.
Raising Funds to Seize the Moment
Within the next three months we will be ready to submit the completed manuscript for typesetting. With our editors and work-study students, we will then have to proofread this 700+ page volume, and work with a professional indexer to ensure easy access to its broad range of historical detail.
With luck, the book launch will take place in the Spring or Fall of 2019.
Our fantasy has always been to celebrate the completion of the American Years series on Ellis Island. It was from there 100 years ago, that Emma’s deportation ship left shore — the story of which forms the dramatic ending of our volume. Your reading pleasure will begin as the work of the Emma Goldman Papers Project comes to an end, fulfilling our mission and 39-year labor love!
Closing Message from Emma Goldman
“And here I come back to this powerful thing — the greatest weapon in all the world, more powerful than dynamite and bombs,
and all other things together — that is the fear of public opinion — that the keepers and the jailers and the law-makers and the politicians have the fear of public opinion. It is necessary to create an intelligent, conscious, wide-awake revolutionary public opinion in the United States. That alone will open the prison doors, and nothing else.”
(Finally free, Emma Goldman honors political prisoners still in jail in her Address at the Kate Richards O’Hare Testimonial Dinner on Monday, November 17, 1919, 7:30 o’clock, at Gonfarone’s Restaurant, New York City.)
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16th December >> Daily Reflection on Today’s Mass Readings (Sirach 48:1-4, 9-11 Psalms 80:2ac and 3b, 15-16, 18-19 Matthew 17:9a, 10-13 ) for Roman Catholics on Saturday of the Second Week of Advent
Lectionary: 186
Sirach 48:1-4, 9-11
Psalms 80:2ac and 3b, 15-16, 18-19
Matthew 17:9a, 10-13
Today marks the official end of the Fall semester here at Creighton University. Final exams, papers and projects have been submitted by tired, overextended students. Those same exams, papers and projects are being graded by tired, overextended faculty. Hopefully the spirit of Advent and the anticipation of Christmas has been a focus during these busy days.
When I was elementary school I celebrated the end of the semester with a sleep-over at a family friend’s home. Everyone was surprised about the huge blizzard that blew in overnight preventing me from heading home the next morning. While I was safe and comfortable at my friend’s home, I was very worried about getting home in time for Christmas. My brother was happy to reassure me over the phone that if I was still snowbound on Christmas he would be willing to open all my presents for me. Needless to say, my response to him was not one of gratitude. Fortunately, my dad borrowed a snowmobile and I got home in plenty of time to celebrate Christmas with my family.
This story came to mind as I read today’s first reading from Sirach about the prophet Elijah. He appeared like a fire and his words were like a flaming furnace as he focused on bringing people home, back to the Lord. The sense of purpose from Elijah burns bright like a fire.
While as a young child I was thinking only of myself and my longing for my family (and my Christmas presents). I appreciate the dramatic way my dad came to bring me home. He could have waited until the snowplows did their work, but he wanted his family together all under one roof. Moments such as these from my life can help me understand the powerful message of scripture.
In the Gospel two days ago we heard Jesus tell the crowds that John the Baptist is Elijah. And in the Gospel today Jesus tells the disciples: “Elijah will indeed come and restore all things; but I tell you Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him but did to him whatever they pleased. So also will the Son of Man suffer at their hands.”
Today I pray for the grace to recognize people in my life who could bring me closer to God. I ask myself to explore times I treat someone as I please rather in the way they should be treated. I reflect upon how I can be inspired by Elijah to share the good news of the birth of Jesus this Advent season. I pray for the awareness to not let a busy schedule and long lists of obligations turn me away from God.
Lord, make us turn to you; let us see your face and we shall be saved.
by Mary Lee Brock
Creighton University's Department of Interdisciplinary Studies.
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