#i only really talk to one of them anymore anyway

[bubblergoespop]

EA ramble so Spoilers hehehhe (it’s very long and half of it probably doesn’t make sense i’m sorry)

FIRST OF ALL the start of the audio oh em gee he’s such a horny bastard i love it. i need to stop saying that um anyway. tbh i wasn’t even caught off guard that much bc that’s just the kind of thing i expected from a porter audio.

THE SAM CALLL AAWHHH porter’s genuine shock at sam, vincent and lovely leaving the house hurts me because he can’t seem to fathom having the kind of freedom and lack of obligation to make that choice AGH and i love his attitude he’s so silly.

“i am busy with someone very important to me.” kill me now please i can’t take this anymore. this whole audio’s focus was the fact that porter and treasure don’t know each other that well but despite that, porter cares too much about treasure to just up and leave them even at the mention of his house falling apart. it’s crazy how much he cares for treasure already and I LOVE IT wow sure do hope nothing bad happens to this weak defenceless unempowered human….

speaking of unempowered, i LOVE that porter addressed the power imbalance and how that was affecting treasure’s responses to him. i know treasure seemed to be stubborn, straightforward and upfront in porter’s sleep aid audio but i have a feeling that after porter denied “talking” so adamantly, treasure didn’t want to keep pushing him. not just out of care but also a slight hint of fear. not only are they unempowered but they were also completely uninformed before porter and i’m sure they still know little to nothing about the magical world. i can’t blame them for being hesitant to push a vampire, whose abilities they don’t really know the full extent of. saying that, they do still obviously care for porter and i’m so so glad that porter addressed this to ensure that treasure’s fear of giving the “wrong answer” doesn’t hurt their relationship with him.

and on the topic of their relationship, porter’s soft “do we?” after talking about the possibility of wanting to make their relationship long-term and more in depth AAAAAHHHH he’s so cute. and him acknowledging that it’s been a while since he’s had the desire or even the time to get to know someone outside of the solaire house hurts my heart so much. the fact that even after he was “freed” of his maker, he still was too absorbed by the need to appease william that he didn’t have time to live his own life outside of that is so painful to think about and i love it. also he’s just cute when he’s unsure heheh.

ngl i thought porter mentioning treasure’s surname would lead to him revealing his own true surname. but that’s mostly just me being hopeful because it’s still quite soon in his and treasure’s relationship. he doesn’t even know treasure’s surname so i doubt he’s in any place to just drop something so personal, maybe even something that brings up such emotional memories considering even his life before turning wasn’t the best.

porter’s little darling’s hehehe erik loves that term of endearment so much i swear. OH and porter’s repeated mentions of sam, to me, prove that there is something more to sam’s friendship with porter than there seems to have been shown to us. sam himself has already said he has a sort of tolerance for porter’s bullshit, even if it has limits. and now, porter’s mentions of sam throughout a conversation that doesn’t involve him tells me that the pair are closer than they seemed to be. which makes sam leaving the house hurt even more oh my god i can’t believe how porter feels considering maybe the one person in the house he could stand to be around is leaving. and even after trying to make up with vincent, now vincent is leaving too. porter lets pack our bags too and run away together as well please, you deserve everything.

UGH TREASURE MEETING SAM AUDIO WHENNNN??? erik please give sam a chance to reflect the “sam landed you?” comment onto porter with treasure.

AAAGGGHHHHH i can’t wait to see where this relationship goes. i didn’t think this would turn into such a long ramble wow i love this man (he’s fictional) he’s such a cutie (he has no canon appearance) i wanna marry him (he’s nothing but a voice).

#thank you erik for switching the dates i’m going to combust #i think i’m actually going crazy #redacted early access #redacted patreon #redacted audio #redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted porter #redacted treasure

[isalisewrites]

A Deep Dive into JKR's Terrible, Amateur Writing - Reflective Interlude

Hello and welcome to my ballsy series where I will prove to you, dear reader, that J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series and resident Twitter TERF, is actually a very, very poor writer.

And when I say ‘poor writer,’ I’m talking about her prose, her sentence structure, and her scenes in the Harry Potter series. I am not going to discuss anything about the HP world nor the overall plot of the books. 

This is all about the nitty gritty in the craft of writing itself.

Part One Link.

Part Two Link.

However…

Hiya! *waves* I’m Isa, the author of this… Actually, I dunno what to call this series anymore. Anyway, thus far, you’ve heard a very satirical tone from me in the previous two posts, but that’s not my normal tone. I’m a rather laid back kind of gal with a side of sarcasm and deluge of emoji usage.

I have used quite a confident, even bombastically obnoxious tone in the effort to be entertaining and engaging with these posts. It was meant to be playful and sarcastic. It’s the internet, so I’m aware everyone’s attention is… kind of like a commodity, unfortunately. Look at TikTok or YouTube. How long does a 30s video hold your attention before you’re scrolling to the next? It depends for me, I’ll admit. People don’t have the attention span for long style posts such as these and that’s fair. Sometimes, I don’t either.

Thus, I used repeated ‘catch phases’ to maintain a rhythm and a thematic style through the series with a controversial title meant to hook a reader. I repeat the opening, even in this post. I repeat ‘Class is in session’ to show the beginning of the major section of the post.

However, in this interlude, I’ve toned it all down because I wanted to give you a window into my heart, my purpose, and my intent in this series. It is a reflective post that ends with writing motivation to you, my dear reader, as well as links to writerly resources. 

I’ve had a lot to think about this week and I realized that many writers (and other creatives) have to battle against an enemy found within themselves. This enemy often torments many with cruel, destructive thoughts; they burrow their way into so many writers’ minds. It whispers: “Can you really do this? Are you really sure you’re any good? Aren’t you just fooling yourself? They’re going to find out you’re just a fraud. So… why bother?”

Whose voice is that?

Let’s talk about the destroyer of creation, Imposter Syndrome, why I refuse to let the bastard infect me anymore, and why my confident tone in previous posts has grated nerves.

Remember: take what resonates and leave what doesn’t.

(This means I write my posts with the honest acceptance and expectation that not everything will fit with your style, your vibes, or your personality. That’s okay.)

All right, let’s buckle up, my dear writing friends. Grab a snack. Hydrate. Let’s begin. And yes…

Class is in session on this little Tumblr post… should you wish to attend.

Having confidence or pride in one’s work seems to be taboo. Any brief moment in time where I tried to be proud about my writing or say, Hey, I’m a good writer, I was always told to be humble. “Don’t be prideful. Be humble.” It would often chip away at my self esteem. I could be a good writer, but I couldn’t allow myself to feel like a good writer.

But no more.

I have only given myself permission to be confident about my writing within the past month. This is why I started this series in the first place. I wanted to share knowledge and in an entertaining way. I make a bold claim that I’m a better writer than JKR; I analyze her writing to both improve my own understanding and to help others as well.

However, this does not mean I’ve ever been under the delusion I’m perfect. Absolutely not. God, that’s so fucking laughable! I am not perfect. I am not a perfect writer. I definitely don’t know everything. Someone once corrected me, informing me that snakes are venomous, not poisonous. Bless them, wasn’t aware of that. Immediately fixed that. One of the recent reblogs said geodes do not contain emeralds. God bless, I didn’t know that, though in the case of how it was used in TBG, I won’t be changing it since it’s within a character thought.

Sorry, Tom. I guess you need to take a geology class, too.

Ugh, and I have so many godforsaken typos. My soul withers when I catch a typo after I’ve posted a chapter. I miss things all the time. I repeat things because ‘that’s my thing’ and I don’t always catch them in my edits. I forget things all the time. Thank GOD for Dede, someone who loved TBG so much she spent countless hours archiving data from it, where she caught a number of inconsistencies and alerted me to them. I still haven’t been able to fix them yet, but I’m so grateful to her. I’ve noted them all down. Harry’s height often is incorrectly implied to be taller than it should be because my brain isn’t wired for imagery. My brain forgets TBG Harry is a short king at 5’4” while TBG Tom is 6’2” and I need to go back to fix all of those. 

I am not a perfect writer and I don’t claim to be.

My goals with this series are to study/learn for myself, teach/share knowledge with others, and learn some more from this experience. I love this kind of analysis. But there’s difference between my analysis of JKR’s writing and a number of those who have retaliated with an analysis of my writing. 

Instead of looking at my imperfections with the desire to learn from them, they were illuminated in the attempt to ‘take me down a notch.’ To those who put in the effort to make counterpoints, I do thank you for your contribution to this series. It is appreciated, even when given impolitely and with the intent to ‘put me in my place.’

Despite all of my errors and imperfections, I still stand by my statement: I am a better writer than J.K. Rowling.

Do you know who else is a better writer than her? I could list thousands of them. They’re fanfiction writers. They’re indie authors. They’re other traditional published authors. They are so many other writers that, yes, I do think are stronger writers than JKR. 

And you’re a better writer, too, so long as you wish it.

I sincerely want you to believe that.

Why? Because it’s clear within the Harry Potter series that JKR did not make attempts to grow as a writer. She just wrote. Perhaps she was under deadlines, but the lack of editing is pretty apparent to me. When you write a lot, you will inevitably get more skilled over time, but you have to actively be seeking improvement to see drastic change in your own skill. It is this lack of drive that I see within her work. She’s not making attempts to push the boundaries of her abilities and skills with each new book.

I’m not at the end of my journey of learning. I never will be. I love expanding my skills. I’m even learning during the process of writing these posts, too. I’m seeing more weaknesses in my own work and I’m now thinking on ways to strengthen my writing even further.

That’s the point of this series.

In the end, it’s not really about me. No, really, it’s not about me. I truly think it’s about the jealousy of seeing another writer be confident in their work. You see, I’m not supposed to be confident; I’m not supposed to act like I can help and teach others to write. How dare I. Posting anything about my work is an act of attention seeking. I’m supposed to be ‘humble.’ I’m supposed to be silent. I’m supposed to wave a shy, dismissive hand at compliments.

Why?

Why is being proud of one’s work and loving one’s own work such a controversial idea?

Imposter Syndrome often cripples creators. There’s already so much self doubt and anxiety in the world, but Imposter Syndrome can really wreck with a creator’s mind. It’s a poison. It stops you from creating what you love most. When you believe you aren’t good enough, then it becomes harder to try. Your belief becomes truth to you, whether or not it was true in reality in the first place. Perhaps, you sink into depression. You become anxious about sharing anything, for fear anyone might say even the slightest negative comment. The heart becomes fragile and brittle, and the muscle which builds skill atrophies over time. You see your work through a lens of self hate. You can only see flaws.

“I will never be good enough.”

When you’re in this state of mind, it’s hard to see the truth about your work.

But let me promise you something: your writing is far more beautiful than you realize.

In spirit, all creative writing is perfect to me with all of its typos and mistakes (yes, even all of the Harry Potter books!), but no single work is objectively perfect. There will always be room to improve your creation because you’re constantly growing. It’s why so many aspiring novelists fall into an endless cycle of editing their first few chapters. The more they write, the more they improve; thus, when they go back to their earlier chapters, they get stuck trying to update those chapters instead of pushing forward to the finish line.

Your work is valuable, no matter what. It’s beautiful. You’re allowed to love your work. You’re allowed to see the good in it and you’re allowed to have confidence in yourself. You’re allowed to say to yourself and to others, I’m a damn good writer.

You deserve to have love, for yourself and for your art.

I have often sincerely complimented other writers and, many times, after they respond with their thanks, it becomes clear to me they’re not confident in their work, yet they have still bravely shared it with us.

I’m so proud of them. Thank you for your bravery.

My heart breaks for them, too. They’re such good writers—such damn good writers. And I wish they knew and believed this.

I will always do everything in my power to encourage others.

How do you feel about your writing? Do you like your writing? You should. You really should because it is good. You created it, after all. There will always be space to grow and refine your craft, of course, but you are a good writer now. You’re going to be a better writer tomorrow and the next day, so long as you desire this growth in yourself. There’s no destination, though. There’s no magic level you have to reach before you’re allowed to have some confidence in yourself and your abilities. The only trap to avoid is remaining stagnant. Writing is a skill. Writing is a craft. This means it gets better through study and practice.

You can achieve that.

I know it’s hard, though. There are so many naysayers in life. There are so many people waiting to attack and bring others down, both on the internet and in our own families. How many precious fanfics have been lost because a writer received horrible, hateful comments? How many writers have disappeared from the internet because of this cruelty? We have lost many in all fandoms. That is unacceptable to me.

Uplift others. Spread love, not hate.

You’re allowed to be proud about your work, imperfect as it may be. Please, I beg you, don’t let the negative voices of others—including your own!—drag you down and steal the joy of creating. I know it’s so very, very hard to stand strong against such voices. Words have power, but you have more. Resist the naysayers.

What you have to offer the world is precious. Please lift your head and acknowledge that what you create is good. It’s great. It’s amazing. It’s fucking fantastic. You’re not an imposter nor a fraud. No one can offer what you can to the world. No one can write the stories you have in your head the way you can. Your style is unique to you. You’re allowed to love it as it is now and you’re allowed to love it whatever form it takes in the future.

Imposter Syndrome is a thief; toss it into jail and throw away the key.

My writing is not perfect and it never will be, but I’m a better writer today than I was ten years ago. I’m a seeker of my own growth. I’m often reading books on writing and watching YouTube videos on writing. I absorb it all because writing is my truest love and passion. My style has evolved from reading endless amount of novels and fanfics. I devour both. 

But I wasted a decade thinking I didn’t have what it takes.

And life is short. I can’t waste anymore time.

Don’t be like past Isa, please.

There’s a difference in refinement between an episodic fanfic posted over the course of years and a traditional novel published in whole, but I still stand by my work. I recognize my style will not be enjoyed by all those who read it. It’s okay if you don’t like my style. I’m eternally grateful for the many readers who do love my writing. I’m humbled and honored by the sheer volume of people who have commented, bookmarked, and have left kudos on my work. Thank you.

My style has evolved into what it is today due to a combination of two things.

I have ADHD. It’s why my style uses smaller paragraphs as a whole.

I have aphantasia. I lack a mind that can visualize pictures. I literally cannot see anything in my mind. When people say, “I can picture it in my mind,” that’s not me. I cannot at all. When there’s a lack of description in prose, it feels blank and empty to me. This is why I use vivid descriptions in the way I do because otherwise I feel nothing from my work.

It’s okay if this style doesn’t work for you. I love my style because it caters to what I need. I also love other styles that don’t use as much description; however, I can’t always follow what’s happening because of the wiring of my brain. I can get lost sometimes, but I still appreciate their style because I can’t effectively do what they can.

If you find no value in my style and what I offer in this series here, then that’s okay. I’m not offended. This series is for those who benefit from it. For you, there are so many other writers out there from whom you can learn and I’m more than happy to send you in the direction that benefits you the most.

Here’s a list of YouTubers you might find interesting.

ShaelinWrites has been working on many unpublished projects through the years and has lots of great discussion videos on writing.

Abbie Emmons is a self published author with solid writing advice in all of her videos. 

Alexa Donne is a traditionally published author with great insider information into the traditional publishing world. 

Ellen Brock is a professional editor. She knows her stuff.

I hesitantly suggest Jenna Moreci and her content on YouTube because I think she has some major weaknesses in her writing. Many others have seen this about her books. However, she is a successful indie author and her YouTube content has a lot of value.

Brandon Sanderson has an entire college course in a playlist on his channel. It’s a fabulous free resource if you vibe with his style of writing. Highly recommend. 

Here’s a list of writing books I recommend.

Elements of Fiction Writing, a five book series. My TOP recommendation is Elements of Fiction Writing - Beginnings, Middles & Ends.

Sin and Syntax: How to Craft Wicked Good Prose

Let the Crazy Child Write!: Finding Your Creative Writing Voice

Novelist's Essential Guide to Crafting Scenes

All right then.

Thank you for sticking around. I hope you accept this post in the good faith it was given and was always given in the previous posts. Next post, I’ll be returning to my playful satirical tone. Hehe~!

Please do the world the greatest of favors and write. Create. Share your fanfiction. Become best selling authors, traditional or indie. I promise you’re far more capable and skilled than you realize.

Until next time.

Isa

#harry potter #hp #fanfiction #fanfic #hp fanfic #hp fanfiction #jk rowling #fuck jkr #anti jkr #jk rowling is a terrible writer series by isalise #on writing #writing #writers #writer #author #authors #writing advice #writing motivation #writing stuff #becoming better at writing #writing tips #writeblr #writing reflection #writers on tumblr #writers on ao3 #writerscommunity #creative writing #JKR's Terrible Amateur Writing Series #writing help #writing resources

[hacked-by-jake]

So, I wanted to point something out just quickly..

Since yesterday I talked several times with some wonderful people on discord. (💚) Probably some of you know which people I mean. Anyway. That's not the point.

I sadly saw a couple of very, veeery rude posts here. Some behaved really very hateful. We never had something like this bad before here.

And I wasn't sure if I should mention it or not.

And now, I got a very lovely anon ask. Then, I had another short conversation with one of the wonderful discord people and now I decided I want to quickly say something about it. Before it gets worse.

Your anger is okay. Your disappointment is okay. Your hate is not. Constructive criticism! That's okay.

If you see someone here, being rude. If you get asks from people being rude and nothing else. Please don't react. I know this can be sooo hard. But do not react. Don't answer hate asks. Don't comment on hate. Your intentions might be pure and kind. But you simply can't talk with some people. They don't want to talk. They want to force you to accept their opinion and throw your own away. And we should not give those people space to share this. No one of us deserves it.

I said before, I love this fandom deeply. With all my heart. And I don't want rude people here. They do not belong here.

Even if you only want to be kind and that's why you answer in any way.. I sadly saw some people in the last days..

Anyway. I'm rambling. Long story short:

Let's take care of this fandom! Let's make sure together it stays as wonderful and lovely as it always was. With nothing but wonderful content and love for each other. For everyone in the fandom.

If you see a rude person, block them. Doesn't matter if their post is rude or just a comment or anything. Don't let these people get close. Block them and keep being part of something so wonderful that doesn't accept hate. If no one reacts, they can post whatever they want. But we should not answer that. In any way.

Maybe you saw the rude ask I got yesterday. I answered it. But a couple of minutes later, I regret it. And I should not have answered.

Don't make the same mistake. Block user with hateful posts. Block hateful asks (you can block anons), don't react to comments.

Don't do that to yourself, no one deserves it. And if no one sees the posts anymore, maybe they won't post more. But by blocking we don't have to care about this. And we should not have to care about it.

Leave criticism, that's okay. But otherwise, be kind. Don't make a fool out of yourself for hating people in a place like that. In a places that's meant to spread positivity.

Stay safe, and don't let them pull you down. This is our fandom, not theirs. 💚

#moonvale #duskwood #moonvale fandom #duskwood fandom #please love each other 💚

[magicaii]

Need a spinneraki non-villain au where both of them are shut in losers. Like, shuichi is a college drop out who’s been a NEET for the past two years and has convinced himself that he will never fit into society so why even bothering trying and doesn’t even care enough to outside anymore and tomura never made it to college at all and just lives off of his rich dad’s (afo) income as he does nothing but stay home to game and browse the internet all day cause he’s addicted to league of legends and he’s a closet scaly.

so imagine tomura and shuichi meeting cause they ended up in the same game because tenko misclicked and chose the wrong tier, and because he’s a bit of a toxic gamer, when he notices shuichi’s character choice he turns on vc just to say, “seriously? fucking zilean in the jungle? you’re never gonna make it out of iron asshole” and he only said it be to be dick and ruin some guy’s day, but he actually ends up advising the guy to choose a better character because he’s weirdly innocent and clueless for a league of legends player and it completely takes tomura aback. he finds out the guy is a complete newbie, which kinda explains it.

and during the game, spinner (his online name) keeps asking him questions since he’s apparently just decided that tomura has signed up to be his guide. and tomura kinda just goes along with it, and they’re the only two talking in vc anyway, although he’s far from nice about it. (think: what the fuck? USE YOUR SKILL or SUPPORT ME IN TOP LANE IDIOT)

so after the game tomura is about to move on with his day but then spinner sends him a friend request and he’s like ??? why does this weirdo think I’d wanna be his friend. but the request comes with a message and it says “haha thx for the help today? I’m kinda new at this… wld appreciate some more guidance n stuff… hope I can be as good as u someday lolz” and now tomura is half convinced this guy is just a fucking troll or something, cause there’s just no way. but what the fuck else is he doing anyway? so they exchange discords to chat.

spinner is strange. sometimes spinner will say things like “why is everyone so nasty in this game :((” and tomura will be genuinely confused because?? everyone knows league of legends is a toxic cesspool?? one day he finally asks what spinner’s deal is and why he started playing, and spinner goes “well tbh I was looking for friends”. tomura just deadpans that he’s definitely looking for them in the wrong place. spinners like, “I thought it would be easy to talk to people since there’s a voice chat but turns out people just use it to yell at each other and get into arguments. why would anyone do that lol, crazy” tomura just pauses cause he doesn’t really know, either. he’s been getting into arguments with random people in voice chat for years, it’s practically become a routine at this point, but he never stopped to think about it much. it’s pretty much become his only source of social interaction apart from his dad. with a pit in his stomach, he just replies “maybe they’re lonely.”

sometimes weird background sounds will come out of tomura’s mic, and spinner, after a while, finally asks, “so I’ve been wondering for a while. sometimes it sounds like someone is being murdered in your basement, what is that” and tomura’s like “oh don’t mind that lmao, it’s just my dad. he’s an investment banker or some shit and he gets fucking tilted at the stock market. idk I mostly tune it out now” and spinner just goes really quiet and says “umm. ok!”

#spinneraki #bnha #spinner #shigaraki

[fincherfogg]

.

#i dont think my friends actually like me #recently theyve been seeming more and more like those no negativity allowed kinda ppl #and im going through a though time atm but with money and my disability #both things that none of them really struggle with or understand #physical disability specifically i mean #we have a vent channel in our discord and anytime anyone but me uses it they get showered with love #literally scrolling through it and realising im ignored every single time #and i dont go over board im not like wow i hate myself i should just die #im literally just like #hey guys just letting you know my legs are getting worse and our landlord is trying to make us homeless #like if your friend tells you they cant walk anymore i think if youre a normal fucking person youd at least say SOMETHING #theyve sucked for ages but im really realising it now #i think im just gonna tell them all to fuck off tomorrow #i only really talk to one of them anymore anyway

[tricoufamily]

oc evolution tag, thank you @sikoi :))) <3

i randomly posted their real evolution a few days ago before we were doing these should have waited lmao. i did remake this edit at one point though!!! very cute

#racking my brain for sims who i've had long enough that they've had a big evolution i'm honestly coming up short #my villareal characters and other townies like only ever get skin details changed and we don't talk about the heavy blush phase #do i even have other sims. i cant think of any rn. they are the first ocs i ever posted on simblr ever i think. which is CRAZY #anyway even this edit's kind of old i never do beckett/connor couple stuff anymore do i it's weird #their romance is really really not the main focus of the story at all so ig i just am always thinking about other parts of their characters #their romance is one of the least developed things about them to be honest. which is weird for me i love an unhinged romance #beckett #connor #ts4 #blood sports

[peribytes]

THE BITCH IS BACK, BABES !!

#NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #THE ANIMAL IS OUT OF HIS CAGE. THE ANIMAL IS FREE. #FUCK THAT PLACE. SHITHOLE OF A PLACE #i have a word or two for my doctor and it starts with F and Y #i got no help. zero. whatever they said i have already learned from the internet. lol. #also my anxiety was so bad in there i lost 4 pounds from a poor appetite. #and they gave me fuckin. lithium #my parents were SO MAD when i told them over the phone #anyway #i'm home and i couldn't be happier about it #just the thought of being trapped in that place makes me wanna vom <3 #oh yeah i was put in the detox unit instead of the one for mental disorders or whatever it is #my dad was very mad i was put in with the alcoholics and drug addicts but they were very nice people #i was able to come out of my shell and have conversations with them pretty easily #that is the ONLY positive thing i can say about my entrapment #i missed you guys so much. i really missed my family #god and now they're gonna call me tomorrow morning to talk about whateverthefuck #and i gotta call my doctor in a week #god i don't wanna talk to these people anymore. LEAVE ME ALONE

[eloquentsisyphianturmoil]

A considerable motivator for Sirion was actually the deaths of the middle brothers— who would’ve wanted to pursue the Silmaril further. Yes, there was the oath, but also the fear that their brother’s had died in vain.

#I just think people miss this a lot when characterising Maedhros and talking about sirion #Because it was celegorm and cured in who essentially led the onslaught on doriath #and Maedhros’ eye was probably still on angband before they mentioned the other silmaril and Luthien died etc. #Their deaths were really complicated because a) them made heaps of stupid decisions and b) they’re still their brothers and it hurts #Like could you imagine losing half your family all of a sudden #And the one thing that stands between you and peace - which you hate yet love - is right there being withheld from you #Fuck I’d ask for it too #And when they refuse is fight them for it too #its the only way of making anything seem worth it anymore #and somehow it seems the pain of the people you’re slaughtering is still not worse than what you’ve been through #Have they had to bloody their hands? Have they seen their family ruin themselves and known they loved monsters #Anyway #silm #silmarillion #the silmarillion #the silm fandom #silm fandom #the silm #tolkien #i have thoughts #lots of thoughts #sirion #third kinslaying

[undyinglantern]

the amount of surprised pika “wait people actually shave their arms?” comments on posts about body hair are so funny like I unironically am so happy for you that you weren’t laughed at by a classmate for having hairy arms “like a man” in like 4th grade this is why I wish body hair conversations would stop centering around armpit hair

#okay that’s the tldr but the way I actually remember it is that the classmate (a boy) pointed out my arm hair and ask why so hairy #and I genuinely was so confused I was just like idk??? and then later at home that day I asked my mom about it and she was like #It’s bc your dads side of the family is hairy so then I later talked to that guy again like ‘I take after my dad’ or whatever #And /then/ is when he laughed and was like ‘but you’re a girl’ about it #Granted I’m non-binary but like I didn’t know that in elementary #Plus I didn’t stop shaving until around mid 2010s and was still self conscious about it for years #Like I remember feeling embarrassed during college (2018ish) if I had to use the rest room and someone else was in there when I would roll #My sleeves up to wash my hands #Anyways I eventually stopped caring about it sometime within the last year or 2 but see how long that took? It really shouldnt #Like some of us just genetically have more darker thicker visible body hair than others and we shouldn’t be shamed for it #One thing at a time though because even I’m still working through leg hair shame #I don’t shave them anymore but I also haven’t worn shorts outside of my bedroom in years #I’ll literally switch into shorts if it’s too hot right before bed and switch back into pants before stepping out of my room in the morning #I’ve been feeling cute the past few days and it’s starting to warm up again plus also had a convo w mom recently so #I might change that soon but only within the house still bc baby steps <3 #Anyways I’m just rambling now so I should stop. Good night !!

[risingsunresistance]

i went to a con over the weekend and bought a bunch of stuff from a rock shop. love going to cons in this area bc it's like 25% fandom junk (and i dont rlly watch anime), 50% arts and crafts, and another 25% JUST for funko pops hdhfhd

already showed you Apple :]

also got this lil tree

some mushrooms to go with my bigger mushroom that i got at a different convention from different people jdgfkh

and... ROCK PIG !! he is wonderful and also very heavy

also bag update! got the heart pin at the con, everything else has just been added/moved/etc overtime lol. need to space it out better but im tired of stabbing myself so it's fine for now

also ark got me a beetle :D

#that is all i got at the con btw 😭 #was hoping i'd see some splatoon stuff but this was the smallest con they've had yet #next con should be a bit more interesting #but i greatly enjoyed the rocks #i know ppl are wary of rock decorations like this bc they might be fake but #tbh i just like the way the look so i dont rlly care lmao #if my rock pig is actually made of Unknown Material that's okay 👍 #the heart pin is the only one i didnt pick up at the rock booth #subtlest aro pin ever 👍👍👍 IM SO MAD THEY HAD A REALLY NICE RAINBOW PIN #BUT NO IM 23 AND STILL FORCED TO BE IN A GLASS CLOSET JHDKFJK #mom i know we both know can we just get it over with already 😭 #also got to meet some exiled queer family down there and catch up talking YAYYYY their youngest added us on discord jdhdhk #it was so fucking refreshing. i thought the only other one in my family died... had no idea that was why we didnt talk to them anymore #anyways that's how my life has been sorry for the continued absence tjere's a lot hapwning rn 👍 #and by a lot i mean nothing but i stay exhausted hdhfkj it's just been. [static] ya know #chat

[poomphuripan]

New stills from Q26 of iQIYI and YYDS’s My Stand-In (2024), dir. Pepzi Banchorn Vorasataree & Khom Kongkiat Khomsiri

#poom phuripan #up poompat #my stand in the series #my stand in #userrain #usersasa #userbunn #userjamiec #oh they're definitely posting pics from all 31 queues my god #sure just spoil everything will ya #that being said can we talk about how they've posted 26 sets of pics but only like a handful of pics with smiling poom #oh they are really gonna make my boi joe suffer #the more i look at poom. the more i can see zhouxiang in him #so much sadness and trauma for this character and i just know poom will be crying so much. that's his FORTE! #its so funny that ming is supposed to be the richer one btwn the two of them tell me why is his closet worse than joe's plain clothes #anyway angsty my stand in PLEASE COME SOON #i cant take it anymore. come before i started spilling spoilers in the tag

[aeolianblues]

one last thing I will say on that topic. Americans getting upset about you calling out Zionism. When you're not talking about Judaism or in fact, about religion at all. When you're talking about a national military funded by a country that has been dropping bombs on the middle east since the 1980s. But then I suppose when people who are so so so comfortable with equating a whole religion, or further a whole entire group of multiple ethnicities, with simply 'terrorism', are criticised on any aspect of their wrongdoings of course they must think we're talking about their whole religion. Literally every word is a projection.

#I lost all respect for that person honestly. I used to think they were quite cool. I put up with a lot of blatantly horrendous shit thinking #'surely it's only a defensive thing. Surely they're only talking about the sadness within their community rather than actively supporting #the mass killings of thousands of people. Surely they're a teacher they've got to have that empathy with kids being murdered' #No! The fucking full clownshow. And now I've been feeling like an idiot all day— like why did I go 'let it slide' x 100 #why should *they* walk away feeling like they've got some sort of moral superiority here and why should I feel like I've been struck down? #Why am I the idiot that didn't block them four months ago #Anyway sorry to everyone who's had to watch me spam about one (1) negative interaction *all day long* it will subside soon #I'm just stinging from the fucking. Utter blindness. #We've always said someone's comfort doesn't override someone else's right to survival #as a literal genderqueer person they KNEW that. They'd uttered the same fucking sentence #but alas the pinkwashing that makes me so frustrated with Americans sometimes. It magically doesn't apply where racism is concerned ✨😃 #The US really is bombs dropped by rainbow-painted aircrafts; that meme should not be this accurate #anyway I'm glad that person is not in my life anymore. I'm glad my dash has one less abomination to repeatedly show up on it #and I have every right to be angry and I will be. I just won't bother you lovely folks with it

[lesbianlenas]

the thing is that i HATE orientation stuff so much like i hate having to do little activities i hate having to talk to random ppl around me i hate having to pretend like i care abt the school as some sort of identity like i do not care i am just here bc i want an education……& like fr and honestly i hate heterosexual ppl so much like i really do and i’m always surrounded by heterosexuals at these types of things and they never want to talk to me & i never want to talk to them so i just feel incredibly uncomfortable the whole time. like this happened to me in both high school & college and it will inevitably happen again. i am not made for this world on god……….

#michelle speaks #if i have to do a single ice breaker i will start ripping ppl apart w my teeth perhaps 🤪 #s2g my whole life it’s like i have had dyke written on my forehead & everyone is like oh it’s dyke girl let’s pretend she doesn’t exist #like i’m talking all the way back to when i was in prek where none of the other kids would talk to me 😭 #like bc of my rsd ive always had a VERY hard time initiating convos even back when i was very little #but it’s like that’s not normal for little kids to not approach another kid. like when i say NO ONE would talk to me in prek i mean fr #the only ones who talked to me were two boys who would make fun of me for sitting alone when we were in the play room #bc no one ever invited me to play w them & i was too anxious abt approaching anyone to ask to play #even tho i really wanted to…..like ppl literally just ignore me it’s BIZARRE!!!!! #it doesn’t bother me anymore really like idc actually i like have friends so idc if i make more or not #but there HAS to be smth abt me since i was a child that makes ppl like i’m mot going to talk to her. & i think it’s the lesbianism……. #ANYWAY. i hate orientation i don’t want to talk to anyone i don’t want to hear abt anything. bye.

[gothamcityneedsme]

all the bitters on my crew: someone will die

me and megu, the upbeats: of fun!!

#Shitpost #actually im an upbeat altruist so im a massive tool who would be like 'but no one has to die' #So really its only megu #My character is trying to fix all these fucking people #Also thats correct for me anyways. Lmao. #Kairos and Sarge sitting together at the bar talking about war and death #Hole sitting next them like: yeah i wish /i/ didnt exist anymore #Sarge and Kairos giving the FLATTEST stare #my pc panicking. #megu is drinking a cocktail with three umbrellas in it

[honeysuckledreams]

Also since I am being too personal and there is a slim chance one or two members from that old college friend group might see this, in bombshell news Ren and I are no longer friends, and Ren and Fed (now Fae) are divorced. Ren and I ended late December 2022, so it's been 1.5 years and I am finally, finally starting to feel better.

In my version, I couldn't emotionally support Ren through their divorce anymore, and I needed a break from talking about it literally 4x a week. They found out I talked to Fae about the divorce after I set that boundary with them (because that was the third time Fae ever asked for insight about the divorce, and it was still almost too much) and Ren ghosted me! My best friend of seven years ghosted me because I set a boundary and wasn't capable of emotionally supporting them anymore. We literally talked every single day for our whole friendship before that point.

After 2 months of occasionally reaching out to them and getting radio silence, I ended our friendship. The ending was mutual in the last conversation we had.

#Shit sucks #I was literally planning on having them as a life partner and living with them since I was 18 #But it happens #And honestly my life is a lot better now #I never really felt like I could be happy around them or talk about my life when it was good because they were always so sad #And they were always having a really really hard time #And I wanted to support them but I didn't want to be in a hard spot myself #And it felt like we could only connect on shitty things #By the end I did not recognize them at all #And from how they have acted and what they have said after and how they see themselves is just #I have no idea who this person is #And I never realized how much they hid from me #That friendship ending is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do #That was all of my 2023 just recovering from that friendship ending #I went to therapy specifically because of it #Anyway #I've wanted to kind of let people who knew us know but I can't do that lol #So talking into the void feels good #But losing Ren and Fyo devastated me #I still talk to Julia P Fae and Olwen though #I love all of them a lot and I am really happy we are still friends #Celestia says stuff #It honestly was a bit of a blessing that they ghosted me even though it was utterly devastating and broke my heart like nothing else #Because any other ending would have been so much harder #It was (mostly) clean and quiet and quick #And I just don't think we could have been friends anymore with how they were acting and treating people #So

[edelorion]

#edel vents #disclaimer: really personal issues in the tags. also wishes of death upon others. this is PROBABLY too much information tbh... #so if you're not up for it scroll down fast!!!! the deluge is coming!!! #today was... eventful. bad. also very bad. grandma's birthday celebration was today #and while she... definitely has Old People Issues (racist) shes also very lonely since the death of my grandfather so i can't really not go #i'm the only one who really visits her regularly to begin with #aside from the... very serious racism issue... she's “alright”. i guess. but that's besides the point. there's family there #and among those... my parents. which i don't like to talk to #discovered they threw more of my old stuff away. typical. wanted to strangle them. as usual. #had to “talk” with my mother (read: spend approximately ten seconds reciting exactly why i *don't* talk to her anymore) #so that whole ordeal completely soured my mood. #went home tired. can't really do anything right now. #at least the food was good i guess. but i also really want to cry... which i can't. which sucks. #...i really like to think i've improved as a person. i used to be really hateful of everything and everyone #worst of all myself. still kinda do but i'm... getting better..? #i like to think i've grown past most of it but every time i see my parents i feel this gripping at my heart. as if i haven't really changed #as if instead i'm still the hateful person i “always was” deep down... bc there's this visceral joy that i feel whenever i'm mad at them. #when i looked at my mother and told her how much i despise her i felt a shiver of happiness. righteousness. #to be clear: i do NOT care for her. at all. she's the worst person on this earth #and the only person whom my philosophy of “nobody deserves to die” does NOT apply to. i'm not scared of hating her. #she genuinely deserves this. but...every time i see my parents - and thus her... i feel as if i'm slipping back into that mindset of hatred #i don't want that. not anymore. it consumed me whole. i was a horrible person back then and i've caused so much grief for so many #i can't let go of this hatred. i can't forgive them. they don't deserve my forgiveness anyway. but i'm tired of hating. #i'm tired of letting that hatred define me. i'm tired of letting that hatred direct me. i'm tired of letting it bring me to ruin. #i'm tired of being who i was. i'm no longer “that”. i'm edel now and i'm happy for people now. if i don't like something i just walk out. #i can just leave. “if it sucks hit the bricks” right?.. but i didn't. i had to say it. i had to tell them. her. and i liked it. #and... i'm scared of that. because it tells me i haven't improved. #i'm not sure what i'm expecting out of posting this i guess. maybe help. maybe i wanna be told that this is normal or something. #maybe i just want to get my thoughts in order. i don't know. i'm gonna stop writing now. #sorry for making you read all this. thanks for doing it anyway. tags were cut off on this one btw so it may look like a mess. but. yeah.