#i want to make her feel like she's on top of the world

[souliebird]

[[and then I met you || ch. 18]]

Series: Daredevil || Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader || Rating: Explicit

Summary:

A one-night stand years ago gave you a daughter and you are now able to put a name to her father – Matthew Murdock. Everything is about to change again as you navigate trying to integrate your life with that of the handsome and charming blind lawyer’s and Matt realizes he needs to not only protect his new family from Hell's Kitchen, but from the world.

chapter masterlist

Words: 3.7k

ao3 link

banner thanks to the wonderful @theradioactivespidergwen

warning: canon typical violence || vomit

“Oh, kiss me, beneath the milky twilight. Lead me out on the moonlit floor, lift your open hand - Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance, silver moon's sparkling. So, kiss me.”

You hum along with the song playing quietly in your ear as you scrub the bathtub. It is one of your cleaning nights and you are focused on getting everything back to tip-top shape. The tub currently has a bit of a purple tint to it after you tried a new brand of bubble bath for Minnie - you are lucky she isn’t now grape flavored as well - and you would very much like it gone. It is coming off easier than you expected, but it is taking a fair amount of elbow grease. 

It is easy to space out and listen to music as you work. Your cleaning playlist are songs you can vibe to that you don’t really associate with anything in your life - mostly you think about the movies the song has been featured in - but you are finding, as you scrub and romantic lyrics float through your head, a certain name and face keeps appearing in your mind’s eye. 

You know it isn’t wise for you to develop a crush on Matt - just because you have a daughter together does not mean he wants to kiss you. You know you need to squash the feelings down before you get yourself hurt. 

But sometimes it is nice to have silly impossible daydreams while you are cleaning alone at ten at night. Having a goofy little smile while you picture yourself spinning around a garden in a dance isn’t hurting anyone. You have a good grasp on reality - you just sometimes want to pretend to be the lead in a cheesy 90’s teen romcom - is that too much to ask? 

No one else needs to know Matt has replaced the lead actor. It is a secret just for you. 

As you scrub bleach powder around your purple-haze tub drain, you catch movement reflecting in the shine of the spout. You can’t hear anything over your music - even though you only have one earbud in - so you sit up and turn around. Of course, it is Minnie standing in the doorway, clad in her jammies, and dragging Scooby by his big paw.

You pull the earbud out, frowning to your daughter, “Is everything alright, Mouse? Is my music too loud? Did it wake you up?”

She shakes her head, then in the most miserable voice you have ever heard from her, whines, “My tummy hurts.”

Instantly, you set down your sponge and your earbud so you can go to your daughter, “your tummy hurts?” 

You move to pick her up, wanting to comfort her, but it is made clear she doesn’t want this by stepping back and holding up her toy between the two of you. It hurts, but it passes, as you know you don’t like to be touched when you feel sick, so instead, you kneel down to be in front of her and try to find the root of the problem. 

“How does your tummy hurt?”

She sways side to side, face scrunching up as she self-analyzes. You can see the little wheels turning in her head, but then there is a very subtle shift in her eyes that only years of being a mother makes you notice. With lightning speed, you grab Minnie under her arms and spin around to hold her over the toilet just as her dinner begins to regurgitate. 

Your heart breaks as she empties her stomach and you try to soothe her the best you can, rubbing her little back as she coughs and hacks. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay, get it all out. Get all the icky out,” you tell her. 

Luckily, her stomach is small and there is not a lot of expel. Once you are sure she is done, you flush the toilet then close the lid, intent on setting Minnie down so you can clean her up, but of course, now she doesn’t want to be put down. She wiggles and turns until she can bury her head into your neck, sniffling and hiccupping, and clinging to you the best she can. 

You can feel bits of vomit on your neck, but since you aren’t completely covered in it, you try to ignore it in favor of your distressed daughter. You begin to rock her gently, humming one of her favorite lullabies as she processes how distressing throwing up is.

You don’t remember when the last time she got sick was, but you have a guess as to what caused this upset - you tried a new ice cream for dessert tonight. It had made your stomach a bit gurgly and you had solved that with a TUMS. 

It hadn’t occurred to you to ask if Minnie needed one, too. 

A lesson for the future.

Minnie doesn’t dissolve into full on tears and after about two minutes, she pulls back and croaks out, “‘cooby?”

She had dropped the toy when you had first picked her up, so you stretch to grab him for her. She quickly switches to clinging to him and you go right for a washcloth. You wipe down your neck first - you can only handle so much - then start on cleaning up your poor Mouse. 

In a blessing from the gods, she only has a little bit of gunk around her mouth and nose. It doesn’t seem like anything got on her clothes. 

Getting her to rinse her mouth out takes a bit of convincing. 

“It will help the icky taste go away,” you promise, but she just clamps her mouth shut and shakes her head. You very much get why she wouldn’t want anything in her mouth after throwing up, but you also know she needs a good rinse. She only gives in after you demonstrate what you want of her by brushing your teeth and gargling some water. However, the condition is that you have to brush her teeth for her while she squeezes Scooby for dear life. 

Once her mouth is clean and the only sign she was ever sick is her puffy red eyes, you scoop up your baby and bring her out to the living room. 

“How does your tummy feel now?” you ask as you set her on the couch and begin to cocoon her in the throw blanket you keep there. 

Minnie rests her head on top of Scooby’s, lip jutting out into a pout, “Icky. And Hurty.”

“Icky and hurty?” You sympathize. You know well the aftermath of throwing up and how sometimes the aftermath is worse than the event - your stomach often turns sour and you feel drained. You know certain fluids will help relieve this, so you kiss Mouse’s forehead and tell her, “Let me see if we have any things to help.”

“Blue Pedi-lyte?” she asks and you can’t help but smile over how observant and smart your little one is. She may not have thrown up in recent memory - but other digestive problems have occurred, and she clearly remembers enough that the drink helped. 

“Yeah. Let me go see if we have any, okay? Do you want to put on some Mickey?”

“Goofy,” is her quick, but mumbled reply. 

You turn on the television and bring up some Goofy related shorts, then head to the kitchen, hoping you have some old Pedialyte. 

But you don’t. 

You have leftover drinks Karen brought you and the only thing that is comparable to what you promised Minnie is yellow Gatorade. However, you have nothing to turn it blue. You have the feeling that trying to give it to your little one is not going to go well, but you try, nonetheless. You fill a sippy cup halfway with yellow liquid and mentally cross yourself as you bring it to Mouse on the couch.

She takes one look at it before pouting at you, “That’s yellow.”

“I know, sweetie. But we don’t have any blue Pedialyte. We only have yellow Gatorade. It will help your tummy, too.”

To her credit, she takes it and holds it in her lap, looking down at it with disdain. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, then wrinkles up her nose and holds the cup back up to you, “It’s stinky.”

You try to not sigh - lemon-lime is an intense flavor and probably won’t taste the best after vomiting, but it is all you have. You crouch down so you are eye level with your daughter and rub her leg, trying to be encouraging, “I know, but it will help your tummy. Can you try for me?”

She looks between you and the cup about fifteen times, her little eyes full of doubt, before bringing it up to her mouth and taking a sip. She does not swallow - instead she looks disgusted before opening her mouth and letting the drink spill down her chin.

“Oh, no, no, let’s not do that,” you groan. You use your t-shirt - which is luckily your cleaning shirt and gross anyways - to wipe her face and soak up the yellow liquid. 

“Icky,” Mouse informs you, then adds, “I want blue Pedi-lyte. Please?”

You take in your daughter, looking so tiny wrapped up on the couch. How awful it must be to not only be nauseous, but to be so with enhanced senses. You’ve thrown up enough times to know what an unpleasant aftertaste it leaves, so she must be so miserable.

You rub your hands over your face and give in, “Okay, let Mommy go change into real people clothes, and we will go get some for you.”

----

You are no stranger to midnight runs to the bodega two blocks west. You had moved into your current apartment when you were about six months pregnant, and you had spent month seven waddling your way there almost every night for a slice of cake.  The late-night cashier, Sal, practically watched Minnie grow up and he is one of the few people who she will talk to unprompted.  So, you don’t feel embarrassed when you stroll in wearing sweatpants and a band-tank top, with Minnie still in her jammies - Sal has seen you in worse states and at least you aren’t wearing a robe and slippers. 

There’s a couple of college aged boys lingering around the snacks section who smell heavily of marijuana, and they seem more interested in talking about what chips to get than anything, so only your hyper paranoid mind makes you take notice as you make your way to the drink coolers. You pass all the fun things and go to the very back corner of the storefront where the small selection of medicinal goods are. 

Tampons, Tylenol, and band aids are stacked low on the dry goods shelf, and across from them, practically on the floor of the cooler, is one row of Pedialyte. The gods must be smiling on you because it is indeed the blue flavor your daughter is desiring. 

You open the cooler, and with Minnie on your hip, squat down to retrieve your prize. Almost instantly, she starts making grabby hands for it, asking with a bit of a whine, “Mommy, open it.”

“We have to pay for it first, then you can drink it,” you remind her, feeling guilty as you do. You can see the upset in her eyes, and to try and mitigate the damage, you offer, “Do you want to help buy it?”

Mouse, always the eager helper, nods against you, so you hand over the drink, stand, and start making your way to the counter. The stoned boys are debating which chips will leave the least amount of residue on their gaming controllers as you pass them and part of you wants to stop and listen. You don’t have an interest in video games beyond silly ones on your phone, but their passion is intense, and you agree Cheeto dust is one of the worst things in the world. You are lucky Minnie finds them gross and much prefers pretzels as her chip of choice.

As you come up to the checkout, Sal looks up from his phone and gives you a pleasant smile, “Late night snack run?” 

Minnie pipes up before you can, leaning forward as far as she can to hold out the bottle towards him, “I wanna buy this, please, thank you.”

Sal, ever kind, reaches across the counter to get it so you don’t have to try to lean in, “Ahhh, no snacks. Tummy troubles?”

“Tummy troubles,” you confirm. You dig into your purse for your wallet as he begins to ring you up.

Sal clicks his tongue in sympathy, before telling you, “My daughter, Sasha, the tall one, she always had the tummy troubles, too. Turns out, she was allergic to corn. Do you know how much corn is in everything in America?”

You make a face at that because you do, in fact, know how much corn is in everything. “I’m sorry to hear that.” 

In your arms, always wanting to mimic you, Minnie gives a solemn nod to Sal, “Sorry to hear.”

Sal laughs warmly, “You are kind. I hope your tummy troubles are not from corn, but too many sweets.” 

That makes Mouse giggle, which warms your heart. When you are told the total, you hand her your card to hand over to Sal. The sweet man swipes it, then addresses Minnie, “Debit or credit?”

Despite not knowing what that means, she instantly replies with, “Credit!” making you smile all the more. 

“Yes, we will charge it,” he says. The receipt prints and he hands that and the card back to you before bagging the Pedialyte in a little black baggie and handing that to Minnie. “Your purchase, little ma’am.” 

“Thank you!” she chimes, and you thank Sal as well. The college boys have finally decided on their snack, so you vacate the counter so they can make their purchase, wishing the cashier a good rest of his night. 

As you exit the bodega, Minnie bonks your arm with the bagged bottle, “Mommy, open it now. We buyed it.” 

“Okay, okay.”

You set her down on the ground, then get the bottle out so you can crack it open. You help your little one take a few careful sips and once she is done, she smacks her lips. 

“Not icky?” You ask and she gives a big nod in response. 

“Not icky.”

“How is your tummy?”

Her fist goes right into her mouth as she thinks over the question. You use the time to recap the drink and drop it back into the bag, then put that into your purse. 

“It feels like jumping dinosaurs,” Mouse finally tells you, “Going ‘bah bah bah’. Like sheepies.”

You have no idea what that is supposed to mean, but you guess that she feels better. She seems more chipper, which isn’t what you need closing in on midnight. If you don’t get home soon and get her back into bed, you are going to have a very grumpy toddler in the morning. 

Which will go great with your expected grumpiness - you still have to finish cleaning the bathroom and who knows how long that is going to take. You’ll need to redo the toilet and throw a load of laundry into the wash. You’ll probably get to bed around two if you are lucky.

So, with the complete intention of tiring your daughter out, you ask her, “Do you want to walk back home holding Mommy’s hand?”

Which completely does the trick and Minnie takes your hand so you can walk back home together, and you begin heading that way. 

Despite being the city that never sleeps, the streets around you are pretty empty. You haven’t come across any other foot traffic and you’ve only seen a few cars roll by, so to you, it seems like a quiet night.

You wonder if that is how Minnie sees it - or in her case - hears it. 

It has been mind boggling learning her range of hearing and how much input she must constantly receive.

Matt is still working on making you his binder - Karen has apparently taken to copy editing it - but he has given you a preview of a few pages and you can barely comprehend it. You think you would go insane if you could hear everyone talking all at once, all the time. Your anxiety would be astronomical, but your sweet Mouse doesn’t seem bothered in day-to-day life.

You’ve been watching her play more and more and you’ve been learning what catches her attention and interests. To your surprise, it has been music. The little wiggles and shakes she sometimes does is apparently her interpretation of dancing and you have been making her a little playlist for her birthday. You think a dance party would be a fun thing to do the night before the zoo trip, to help get out all her energy. You haven’t told her this yet, but you did ask her to let you know when she hears a song she wants to dance to, so you can look into it. 

You don’t want to add anything inappropriate after all. 

You look down at your daughter as you walk, a little smile coming to your face. She’s watching her feet, and it looks like she’s trying to step on her own shadow without making a big deal of it. You’ve seen her do that before or try to walk one foot in front of the other. You aren’t the fastest walker - you tend to stroll - so you never worry about her games slowing you down. 

Plus, if it wears her out, all the better for you. 

You are about half a block away from your building when Minnie suddenly halts and whirls her head back towards the bodega. Curious, you stop as well, wondering what she has heard now. 

“What is it, sweetie?” 

“There’s a hoot-hoot!” She whisper-yells, looking up to you with the biggest, purest smile. 

Your heart practically bursts from your chest with love and your smile grows to match hers, “A hoot-hoot? Can you tell me about the hoot-hoot?”

She nods, then you watch in slow motion as your daughter’s absolute joy morphs into that of horror and before you can even process what is happening, something is ripping you away from Minnie by the base of your neck. 

You are pivoted left and slammed face first into the brownstone staircase you were just walking by. Your vision goes spotty as pain erupts from the center of your forehead - confusion and panic begin to consume you. 

All you can hear is your daughter screaming in fear.

You have no idea what is going on, but all you know is Minnie needs you, and that ignites something deep and primal in your chest.

There is something grabbing and pulling at your top and your purse - which you wear crossbody - and you realize someone is trying to mug you. Fear fills you as you struggle to get away, break free, but whoever it is is stronger than you and keeps slamming you back against the stone.

“Mommy!”

The thing inside your chest bursts to life when you hear Minnie cry for you and you kick backwards best you can, trying to dislodge your attacker. Your foot catches their knee and both of you go tumbling to the ground. You hit the cement hard only to be crushed under the weight of your assailant as they land on top of you. 

You refuse to stay still, squirming and trying to army crawl out from under the mugger, but they easily overpower you. Hands wrap around your throat from behind and you are temporarily overwhelmed by the stench of body odor and filth. You are pressed down into the sidewalk for a split second before being yanked back and you just barely manage to turn your face as you are violently forced back down again. Gravel and glass tear at your cheek. 

Something tangles itself into your hair and your head is once again being pulled back, but you won’t give up. You reach back over your head and grab onto the arm of the person attacking you. You feel flesh, so you curl your fingers and dig your nails in the best you can. 

There is a feral, pained yowl, then your head meets the ground again, but it doesn’t stop. They are trying to push you down into the sidewalk using all their weight, like they are trying to crush your skull.

You kick and buck as hard as you are able to, thrashing desperately in an attempt to break away. The pain is quickly becoming all encompassing, but Minnie is crying, and you need to get to her.

You try to get an arm under you, to try and help to push you up, but there is so much weight and all of it is centered on your upper back and skull.

You can’t get up. 

You can’t get to Minnie. 

You can’t save your daughter.

There is a deep and furious roar, then the crushing weight of your attacker is ripped off of you.  

You gasp for breath as you quickly roll onto your side, terrified you're going to be pushed back into the dirt and smothered. Your vision is swimming, blurry and half black, and everything, everything hurts. 

“DADDY!” 

Your eyes snap open and you try to push yourself up onto shaky arms. You try to turn around to find your daughter, but your body doesn’t want to obey anymore, and you collapse back onto the ground. You force your legs to move the best you can, trying to roll until you can find your daughter. 

“Minnie..” you try to call out but you aren’t sure if any noise escapes your lips.

“Mommy!”

The darkness wraps itself around you and begins to drag you down into its depths. The last thing your mind catches before it switches off is your little Mouse, screaming for you.

“MOMMY!”

“MOMMY!!”

---

:3C

---

tags:

@midnightreids @cloudroomblog @yeonalie @thychuvaluswife 

@petrovafire39 @ghostindeath 

 @allllium

@anehkael

 @nennia-2000 @seasonofthenerd @abucketofweird  @mattmurdockstateofmind @imagineswritersblog @hazelhavoc @smile-child-13 @allst4rsfall @hashcakes @kezibear @mapleaye @sammanna @gamingfeline @moon-glades @nightwitherspring @phoenix666stuff @dare-devil

@ladyoflynx @hobiebrowns-wife @sarcasm-n-insomnia @lillycore

@dorothleah @mattmurdocksstarlight @mars-on-vinyl @mywellspringoflife @sleepdeprived-barelyalive @simmilarly @soupyspence @darkened-writer @akila-twt

@murc0ckmurc0ck @groovycass @sumo-b98 @just3rowsing @tongueofcat @zoom1374

@theclassicvinyldragon @aoi-targaryen @lunaticgurly @nikitawolfxo @shireentapestry @snakevyro @yondiii @echos-muses @honeybug-victoria @the-bisaster @ristare 

@mrs-bellingham @eugene-emt-roe @cometenthusiast @stevenknightmarc @yes-im-your-mom @hunnybelha @actorinfluence @capbrie @prowlingforfood @jupitervenusearthmars

@

Specialagentjackbauer @yarrystyleeza @ofmusesandsecrets 

@mayp11-blog @danzer8705 @thinking-at-dusk @remuslupinwifee @akila-twt  @nommingonfood@mattmurdocks6thscaleapartment @dil3mma @allllium 

@

two-unbeatable-beaters @kiwwia-wiwwia @1988-fiend @xblueriddlex @loves0phelia @ninacotte @lovelyygirl8 @littlenosoul @ednaaa-04  @ astridstark13

 @lovingkryptonitehideout @moongirlgodness @soocore @bluestuesday

@starry-night-20 @rebeccapineapple @writtenbyred @cherrypie5 @capswife @silvercharacterchaos @resting-confused-face

#soulie writes #fanfiction #daredevil #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x you

[dazednmatthews]

(crazy how) this love thing seems unfair~ m. sturniolo

short mini fic cause i lurve this song so bad. angsty asf w a semi-happy ending. enjoy my loves <3333

“mattttttt,” her voice is coated in sleep. “come back to bed.” matt is standing at his closet door, rubbing his own tired eyes. it’s about nine in the morning, much too early to be doing anything other than laying in bed with her.

“you know that i can’t, sweetheart. i have to go work with the guys.” he finally picks a top, a soft, white sweatshirt that’s semi-cropped.

“boooooooo.” she sits up, pushing the curls that escaped her bun away from her face. the look on her face almost makes matt want to say fuck it and stay right here.

after he puts on his shoes and cologne, he walks to the side of the bed and sits. she sinks into him, body melting into his touch. they sit there for a moment, no sound in the room except their breathing. it’s peaceful.

she leans up in his arm and places a kiss at the shell of matt’s ear, making the boy groan softly. “don’t do that. it makes me want to stay right here.”

another kiss, this time under his jaw. “that’s the idea.”

one of matt’s hands are kneading the flesh of her thigh, pausing momentarily to rub circles with his thumb. the other hand is planted gently on her waist. he grips a little tighter when she kisses the corner of his mouth.

“stop touching me like that if you’re leaving.” she whines, pulling away slightly. “so not fair.”

he pulls her back. “give me a real kiss.”

she shakes her head. “ew, no. morning breath, hello.”

matt gives her a flat look. “i put my literal tongue inside of you twenty four seven and you think i give a fuck about morning breath?”

she shoves his shoulder with an incredulous laugh. “it is nine in the morning, matthew!” her eyes are sparkling now. “tone it down.”

matt shrugs. “i’m just saying.”

there’s a brief moment where they lock eyes, and suddenly it’s like all the air in the room has been sucked out. matt moves his hand up, feeling the thrum of her heart beating rhythmically. it’s one of his favorite sounds.

she moves into his lap, his hands coming to the swell of her ass to steady her. her arms loop around his neck, face close.

she pulls him in, gently connecting their lips. the way the interlock is something out of matt’s wildest dreams, serenity coating him from head to toe. he’s tugging and grasping with all his might, always needing her closer.

he can feel her lashes on his cheek, can feel her nails on the nape of his neck, can feel her love through every swipe of her tongue. he never wants to be anywhere but here.

there’s a knock at the door. “matt, we gotta go!” it’s chris. “y’all are too quiet in there so i’m staying my ass out here.”

she breaks the kiss with a giggle. “duty calls.”

he groans, resting his head on her shoulder. “so not fair.”

though it’s a fight, from matt mostly, she untangles herself and stands. she extends a hand to pull matt up, giving him a chaste kiss. “it’s okay, matty, go. i’ll be right here when you get back. always.”

***

turns out that always didn’t mean forever.

there’s a low static sound coming from the t.v, but matt pays it no mind. he’s been sat there for what feels like hours, staring into the distance. he has no idea where his brothers are, something about a friends house or something.

it’s been a couple months since the two split. since matt’s entire world shifted off its axis. he hasn’t seen you since you came to drop off the box of stuff that was filling your apartment. still hurts like the first day though.

matt fights with the same urge he gets every night at about this time. during the day is easier. he’s either asleep or so busy with work that he doesn’t really think about the you-shaped hole in his life. doesn’t really think about the absence of your toothbrush in his bathroom, or the lack of your perfume on his sheets. yeah, the day is infinitely easier.

it’s at night, when he cracks. when he turns in bed and there’s no one there. when he can’t hear the sink running because you’re doing your ridiculous sixteen-step skincare routine. when he walks to his bed just fine because there’s no ill placed bag in the middle of the floor to trip over. it feels like walking into a room and immediately forgetting what you were meant to be doing. he knows something is missing, but he doesn’t know how to get it back.

he wants to call you. wants to talk. to sort through all the communication that wasn’t handled well. it wasn’t a messy breakup, or even a hostile one. and somehow, matt thinks that’s worse. he’d prefer yelling and arguing and just knowing you weren’t right for each other anymore.

but it wasn’t that. instead it was distance and tears and feeling like right now there just wasn’t enough space in each others lives for one another.

he didn’t want this. at all. he wondered if you felt the same. he’d stared at the phone countless night willing himself to dial the number. to draft a text. he’d spent just as many willing you to do the same. it never came though.

matt knows tonight is different. the hum of the ac is lulling the anxious feelings in his stomach. he knows by the way his shaky hands grab his phone that this time is going to be the one.

he doesn’t know what to say, nor how to get it out. he wants to pour his heart out, but he also can’t do that without looking at you. without seeing you and feeling the rush of unwavering love he always got whenever his eyes met yours. it wouldn’t be fair.

so he starts off light and hopes for the best. you always did used to say that he had a way of knowing you better than anyone else.

he hopes to god that’s still true.

a/n: i’m tewwwwww good to y’all fr. jus sumn lite bc i love that damn song soooo bad and it came on this morning and a giant ass cartoon lightbulb went off in my head. anyway number neighbor part five & six later today cause ik that’s what u guys really want 😭 i hope u guys like this okie bye i love you all sooooo bad!!!

TAGLIST:

@sturnioloco @peachmels @sugrhigh @tastesousweet @rootbeerworshiper @hollandsangel @sturnolio-luvs @mattsobvimyfav @misscocodiorsblog @ilovechrisssturniolo @pepsiboyy @braindead4l @mxqdii @fawnchives @hearts4chriss @certifiednatelover @nmegamett20 @imaslut4kehlani @dominicfikue @wovenribbons @streamermattsgf @pr1ncessmatt @pinksturniolo @yourfavoritefangirl @nickmillersn1gf @freshxsturniolo @sturniolobltch @mattspolitank @lookingformyromeo @alorsxsturn @imwetforyourmom @kiarastromboli @sleepysturnss @mattscoquette @sturncakez @inkyray @simply-a-simper @lanas-doll @wh0resstuff @giannasturn @iluvmattsbeard @mattsmad @bambi-slxt

(also if i add tags based on requests and on comments so if u ever want to be taken off let me know!!!! jus send me an ask or a message and it’s no problem <3333)

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo edit #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo x reader #matt stuniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo texts #chris sturniolo headcanon #matt sturniolo headcanon #Spotify

[barcaatthemoon]

lazy day || alexia putellas x reader ||

you and alexia spend a much needed day in bed together.

you groaned as the beeping from your alarm grew louder. there really wasn't anywhere for you to be, but you had forgotten to turn it off for your day off. you tried to roll towards the noise, but surprisingly, you found yourself being held onto tightly by alexia. she wasn't normally one to stay in bed past six, and you wondered for a moment if she felt ill.

"ale, i'd like to stop the beeping," you said as you wriggled away from her. she whined, something that you hadn't heard in quite some time. you quickly turned the alarm off and situated yourself right back in her arms again. "do we have any plans for today? i was thinking that we could maybe go shopping."

"no," alexia told you. you pouted at her, and she was quick to respond with one of her own. "i want to spend the day with you doing nothing. please, mi amor."

you didn't have any real obligations, so you allowed yourself the comfort of staying in bed with alexia for at least a little while longer. you laid back and relished in the feeling of being in her arms. there was nothing in the world that made you feel safe like being with her like that. alexia's strong arms provided a comfort that you knew you'd never find again.

"you know, i'm not really tired." you could feel alexia trying to lull you back to sleep, but it wasn't working. you did love the feeling of her always perfectly trimmed nails raking gently against your scalp.

"that's okay, you don't have to go to sleep. i just want you to lay here with me," alexia said. she pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head as she shifted slightly beneath you. it should have been absolutely perfect, but you had a hard time relaxing when you had the feeling that something was going on with alexia.

this carried on even after she had finally gotten out of bed for the day. it was nearly 9 o'clock, which you didn't believe was late by normal standards, but it might as well have been the afternoon for alexia. she moved around her house sluggishly as she pulled out the ingredients for breakfast.

since you had practically moved in with alexia, she had gotten you used to her making you breakfast each morning. you knew it was mainly because she wanted to make sure that you stuck to the meal plans that had been made up for you, but it was still sweet of her. she liked taking care of you, something that had surprised the both of you quite a bit at first.

alexia was a caring person, but she had never really given off domestic vibes. all of it came quickly once you started to spend time at her apartment. she began to invite you over for meals, basking in the way your face lit up as she brought you something that she had specifically cooked for you.

it was more than just the food. alexia loved doing all sorts of little things for you around the house. she knew that you could take care of yourself and your own messes, but the kisses you'd give her for helping made it more than worth any trouble. today though, as alexia moved around the kitchen, you knew that the dishes would sit in the sink until tomorrow.

"to the couch. vamos!" alexia swatted your ass as she passed you by. you glanced back over at the sink, but didn't make any moves to clean up. you were no stranger to a sink full of dishes, but you doubted alexia was. she liked to get ahead of things before they piled up. "right here, on my lap. get in close. we are going to watch one of the scary shows."

"i thought you didn't like my shows," you said softly. alexia had been very clear that she had no intentions of watching any of the horror-themed shows that you tended to enjoy. alexia liked for you to think of her as tough and fearless, and those shows made her jump and squeal like a little girl.

"i do not, but i like you a lot. one could even say that i love you, so we can watch them today. if it gets to be too much, i'll just use you as a shield." alexia was being extremely honest. you chuckled as she turned the two of you to lay down on the couch.

alexia sprawled out on top of you, partially tucking her face into the side of your neck. she could still see the television, but her view would be easily hidden if she wanted it to be. the feeling of her breath against your neck was a bit distracting, especially once she had fallen asleep. in her sleep, alexia had pulled you even closer, causing her mouth to press gently against one of the more sensitive spots on your neck.

silently, you turned the television off and carefully shifted to lay a little straighter. you'd wake up from your little nap with a terrible ache in your neck, but alexia would be more than happy to rub it out for you. you closed your eyes and tried to match alexia's breathing as you quickly drifted off to sleep. you hadn't done much all day, but the week's exhaustion finally seemed to catch up with you.

hours later, you woke up curled up on alexia's lap as she sat on the balcony. alexia was chatting away to someone on the phone in spanish, carting her fingers through your hair as she spoke quietly. you pretended to be asleep for a little while longer, even though you knew alexia saw right through you. still, she didn't acknowledge it until she got off of the phone.

"i know that i should have left you inside, but i didn't want you to leave my arms," alexia said as she lifted your head slightly. you puckered your lips for a kiss, which she happily granted you. it was a light press of your lips against yours, but it was enough for the moment. anything else probably would have made your head spin a bit.

"what was all that about?" you asked her. alexia's face fell as she looked at you. her contract at barcelona had been extended, an offer that truly reflected her importance to the club. you had yet to be offered anything, and the window was quickly closing on barcelona to resign you. if they didn't, you'd be forced to move out of spain, and that was the last thing either you or alexia wanted.

"barcelona, they'll resign you for three years, but you have to spend next season on loan. they say it's the only way that they can afford to keep you," alexia said. you didn't like the sound of that, but you weren't opposed to going on loan if it meant you could still come back to barcelona.

"where would i go?" you asked. alexia shrugged. there had been a few clubs that were smart enough to really fight for you. all of them were much further away than alexia was comfortable with. although, you had yearned to play for your home country again, even if you knew that alexia would never follow you all the way to sweden.

"up north, like way up north. they want you back in sweden," alexia answered. your eyes lit up a little, and alexia felt guilty for wanting to hide the information from you. she had thought about it, but it felt dishonest, and her honesty was one of your favorite things about her. "i don't want you to go."

"it's just a season, it's not permanent. i doubt you want me to take the only other spanish team that's willing to sign me." alexia's brows furrowed at the reminder of real madrid's offer on you. it was twice as much as barcelona was willing to pay for you, but alexia had threatened to disown you if you played for them. you didn't doubt that she'd do it, the woman loved barcelona almost more than she loved you sometimes. "you can do this ale, i believe in you."

"i don't want to though. i don't want to wake up without you right here next to me. it's selfish, and i know that i'm being a baby about it, but i deserve to be sometimes. it's not fair," alexia whined. you cupped her cheeks and pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose. alexia grumbled a little as you pressed kisses all over her face before you finally kissed her lips.

"don't think about it for now, just enjoy these moments with me right now. let's make a million memories so that when i'm gone, the time just flies by until i can come back to you, okay? you've already given me today," you said. alexia took a deep breath, and if you noticed the tears in her eyes that she desperately tried to blink away, you didn't say anything.

"we can't just lay around all day tomorrow. there's media and training," alexia reminded you.

"i don't need to tomorrow. whenever things get to be too much for me, i'll just remember this day that we spent together. i'll think about the feeling of your arms wrapped around me when i get cold and lonely. anything to put me back in this headspace."

"god, i love you so much," alexia muttered as she squeezed you. you quietly repeated her words back to her, but they were muffled as alexia lifted you up and carried you back inside. this time when your body hit the bed, you knew that it wasn't just for a bit of extra lounging around.

#woso fanfics #woso x reader #woso imagine #alexia putel #alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas x reader

[cherryredstars]

OH MY GOD REQUESTS ARE OPEN💃🏾💃🏾

gosh cherry i love you and your blog sm it makes my day😭

could i please have a college or highschool au where reader studies subjects like social science and business and literature and he does stem subjects and he at first has like a superiority complex, he doesn’t intend to, but he can’t help it, until he sees the reader like talk about social issues or how she can remember 17 step procedures and shit and he’s like…wow. maybe they can be together and he sees her pretend to teach people to learn and he’s learning stuff from her and it’s wholesome asf

god i don’t know i’m sorry im rambling😭😭 you don’t have to ofc but thank you anyway

and again, love you!!

Thank you, love!!!

He's the smartest person he knows.

It's not narcissistic if it's a fact. He's the top of his major program, already has offers for Ph.D programs nationwide mailed to his door. He's sure to get into any genetics department he wants for grad school. He's the star of the industry-path students. He's just that good, and what's the harm in taking pride in your accomplishments?

But he's never met someone like you before.

Usually he wouldn't care for people like you, with their abstract liberal art degrees in nonsense majors that'll just collect dust in a box in an attic somewhere. But there is something so enduring about you, about everything you do. The way you just know what people are thinking based on the twitch of their fingers and why they think it. The way you're so open to everything in a way that would make his lab buddies laugh with their one-way minds. It amazes him, the way your view is so wide in a way that something like genetics or STEM can't comprehend. In a way they don't allow. There is something so breath-taking about the way your mind has this endless freedom that he can't even grasp. Like a kaleidoscope of colors that are simultaneously beautiful and overwhelming to the senses. Something his factual mind craves.

The first time he had seen you, he was in the library. It isn't a place he would usually go to, but he had to collect some textbooks for his professor in the storage closet. He had gotten in a bit of trouble that day for taking so long, but how could he resist when he had heard the sweet cadence of your voice through the open door of a mini-lecture room. Very few students were in the room, it looked like a side presentation; one of those assignments that forced students to present their ideas on a topic to a group of people to try to captivate them into agreeing with your findings. There was a sort of fiery passion in the way you spoke, a hardened steel in your eyes that showed your resistance to back down. It was... enchanting, siren-like. So much so that he had been forced to sit in one of the empty seats in the back of the room, eyes stuck on you as you paced the front of class and rebutted comments from your peers.

He had no idea what you were talking about, but it still had that overwhelming effect on him. One that had him pressing the surface of his stomach against the hard edge of the lecture tables, his senses honing in to hear every last syllable that departed from your lips. There was this dream-like quality to you, something that consumed the mind and made them listen. A sort of intelligence that he would never know or understand. One that he would spend hours trying to learn if you were the one explaining it. He can't remember how long it took for him to start breathing again when your eyes scanned the room and locked onto him, clear confusion on your face at the random presence of college's most-awarded student. He could feel his heart bursting against his ribs, mouth parting slightly from the honor to be the center of your attention for even a few seconds before you looked away and carried on.

Suddenly, he didn't feel like the smartest person in the world. Not when you left him absolutely stupefied.

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x y/n #miguel ohara x you #atsv miguel #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderman 2099 x you #miguel ohara #miguel x reader #miguel spiderverse #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel 2099 #miguel o hara #miguel spiderman #miguel atsv #spiderman 2099 #miguel x you #miguel ohara x reader #miguel o hara x reader #miguel o hara x y/n #miguel o'hara x you

[alottiegoingon]

love letters

shauna shipman x fem!reader

summary: the one where reader receives love letters from jeff

warnings: jeff mentioned for plot reasons, jealousy mentions, homoerotic friendship?, shauna is reader's best friend, no crash timeline, fluff but angsty ending, not proofread

this may have a part II in the future?

you thought it was weird when the first thing you saw as soon as you opened your locker was a letter. you weren't exactly the most popular girl ever but you weren't a loner. you were right in the middle.

you blinked rapidly, eyes darting back and forth to the envelope of the size of your hand and to the completely empty hallway. you were the only one in there. judging by the outside, it couldn't be a warning from school or from the book club you went to. it also didn't make sense to be someone bullying you, it was too neat.

you withdrew the paper nestled inside and carefully unfolded it. it wasnt anything professional, just words meticulously written on a notebook paper. you peer through narrowed eyes, attempting to recognize the handwriting but it wasn't like you knew everyone at school so intimately to know how they wrote.

in the small piece of paper, the words "you're always pretty but today you look as stunning and vibrant as a daisy in spring. love, jeff." are written in a sleek, rounded calligraphy, each letter carefully crafted with black pen ink. you feel your heart skip a beat as you read the name signed on the bottom, not believeing your own eyes. coincidentally or not, daisies were your favorite flowers and you couldn't stop thinking about how he knew that.

jeffrey sadecki was one of the popular boys in wiskayok high. almost every girl wanted to be with him while the boys wanted to be him. you weren't one of those girls, though. you despised how all of them would humiliate themselves and change their appearance or lie about their favorite movies or bands just to get attention from the boys. nothing too girly or the boys would laugh about it but nothing too bold or you wouldn't be delicate enough.

one detail caught your attention and brought you back to reality as you were overthinking a simple letter. the way jeff had signed his name was different from the rest of the words. more angular and noticeably larger. maybe he was in a hurry or too nervous, it didn't matter. the important thing now was to tell shauna, your best friend. you slammed the locker door and hid the letter on your pocket, rushing to the wiskayok high soccer field to let her know everything.

now, in terms of knowing someone closely, shauna was at the top of your list. shauna shipman was your best friend since you were in middle school as two twelve years old with awkward music taste, bad haircuts and an embarassing fashion sense. after school, you and shauna would spend hours locked inside your bedroom talking about your celebrity crushes, make fun of the boys after their unsuccessful try to make a move on the popular girl, and devouring an entire carton of bubblegum ice cream, that shauna would always bring to you, while watching movies. shauna wasn't a huge fan of it. it was way too sweet. but it was your favorite after all.

"i think you should pick the flavor next time." you randomly spoke while the two of you were sharing a bed and watching grease from 1978.

your leg was resting against shauna's, the back of your leg gently positioned on top of her knee. it first started as a way to annoy her when you were around fifteen but then it just became a casual thing. shauna would look all tense with a tight face until she felt your warmth.

"why? it's your favorite." shauna's entire face twists in confusion. her eyes immediately fly at you but you were focused on the small tv. inside her mind, in her own little world, nothing was more important than your sudden hate towards ice cream.

"it's too childish. i don't think any other girl on her last year would pick bubblegum ice cream as her favorite." you groan, frustrated.

"that's so stupid, it's just a flavor. and, you know, i think it matches you."

her words made you curious enough to shift your attention away from one of your favorite movies. she seemed to understand your fogginess and explained herself before you could say a word.

"i mean, it's fun and colorful and free of any judgments. it is also the favorite of a lot of kids and kids are way too honest to lie about something. so if they like it, it's because it's really good.. it's unique, i think."

"wow, shauna..." you subtly nod your head in agreement, feeling touched by her words. "you can really compliment an ice cream flavour that much? "you smile as you tease her.

"just shut up and eat your ice cream. you're so annoying."

now, in senior year, pretty much nothing had changed. you would still spend the afternoons after practice with shauna as well as the weekends. shauna was also really smart and would eventually help you with math, literature or english during finals. she was pretty good at it but it didn't surprise you at all; she was always carrying a book around or that super secret journal that you swore she would write on after you fell asleep during sleepovers.

"jeff? wow... are you sure?" shauna immediately looked away from you and made herself busy, forcing her uniform into her bag, at the second she heard his name. shauna wasn't exactly very fond of him as well but she never sounded so lifeless.

"yeah, he signed his name! i guess it could be one of his friends messing around with me but the handwriting is way too pretty for someone who did it as a joke." you sigh. "and he also mentioned a daisy in the letter. that's my favorite flower, shauna!"

shauna was avoiding your eyes at all costs but, for a split second, you saw her eyebrows knit.

"wait, so you're happy with that? i thought you didn't like him." shauna sounds unbothered but you notice how she rub her hands together to brush the sweat off or how she was incessantly adjusting her shirt.

"i don't. boys are stupid." you give her a determined nod to dispel the thought away. "it's just... it feels nice to know that someone cares about me. we've never had a conversation before but somehow he knows about my favorite flower so, i mean..." your voice trails off.

you never thought of yourself as someone who was excited to date boys. the idea of going out on a friday night with a guy never made you burst with joy. you'd rather spend the night with your best friend and have your typical sleepovers or going out for movies. even watching shauna write on her out of reach journal in silence was more interesting. despite shopping together when needed, playing around with clothes by putting them on and running a fashion show, dressing up for a boy and putting makeup on wasn't your thing, whatsoever. it wasn't fun cause shauna wouldn't be there to make you laugh or roll her eyes to hide how her eyes would affectionately get lost on your figure. "i guess he must be really interested on you, then. right?" shauna looks at you for the first time that afternoon but she looks different than usual, offering a strained smile.

[💌]

the next days slipped away from your hands in a blink of an eye. surprisingly, jeff wasn't actually that bad or at least he tried to be a normal nice guy around you.

you remembered how he was actually nervous when you two exchanged a few words and he made sure to let you know that he was responsible for the letter when he asked if you had liked it with a huge cocky smile. at first, you couldn't care less, he was trying too hard. but then the letters kept coming and you finally accepted to go on a date with him.

you went out for the movies and when you felt him pulling that classic move on you by sliding his arm on top of your shoulders, you had to fight against a giggle. shauna would love to laugh at that with you later. then, you stopped by your favorite place; a small family-run dinner that had a great milkshake of your favorite flavour.

"you don't think it's way too childish to be someone's favorite?" you hear jeff's voice fill your ears while you were focused on getting the last drop of the ice cream. you look up at him with a baffled look, not paying attention to whatever he had just said.

"the ice cream. i never dated someone who liked bubblegum."

"oh. yeah..." you feel heat rise to your cheeks and out of nowhere, you began to trip over your words. "it's not my favorite. it's stupid. i was... just trying something different!"

the days turned to weeks and the weeks became months. just like that, you were walking through the hallways of wiskayok high with jeff's arm over your shoulder. you weren't sure if you liked being seen as his property or something silly like that, but a lot of girls would die to be in your place.

you weren't sure if you actually liked him. the most excited part of your date nights was to eat for free and memorize all the idiotic things he had said to gossip about it with shauna later. besides, you could rarely pick the movie or talk about your day. the name "randy walsh" was stuck on your brain thanks to how often jeff would mention him and his funny stories that would actually make you sleepy.

but, again, maybe you just had to try harder.

the letters kept coming almost everyday. and if not everyday, then at least once a week. somehow, always pretty and perfectly rounded letters with his sloppy signed name on the bottom.

[💌]

"i can't wait to read it! people are saying that it's sad but i think it's gonna be great." you were telling shauna about the new stephen king's book that had came out that week; the green mile.

"i think sad is good. people underestimate how great tragedy can be." she casually mumbles, grabbing the carton of ice cream from your desk that you would share before walking to you.

you were about to agree with her when her words cut you at the moment her eyes met the packaging.

"what's that?" she said with a deflated tone.

"ice cream?" you chuckle at her obvious question. usually she would tease you back or give you a snort. but now she decided to ignore your lighthearted words.

"no, i mean the flavor. since when do you like vanilla?" she reads the words vanilla over and over again before looking up at you.

"oh, yeah. i changed. i'm too old for bubblegum now."

"how?"

"just eat it, alright? jeff said vanilla is too boring but i think it's better than being a kid flavor, right?" you giggle, oblivious to her clear annoyance.

shauna's hands close into fists as soon as she practically smashed the carton against the desk. the loud noise made you look at her almost instantly with widen eyes.

"are you okay?" your voice sounded so low-pitched and whispered that shauna almost couldn't hear it.

"are you? we used to laugh about stupid boys and now you are suddenly changing yourself because of jeff? he barely knows how to spell the world embarrass." you notice her voice slowly getting louder.

"this is insane. it's just ice cream, shauna! you are just jealous cause he writes pretty letters for me while you stay home to your pathetic journal." you feel your blood boil as she accuses you of changing because of a fucking boy. you would never.

shauna doesn't say a word and the silence made you realize that, deep down, she was right. her eyes are staring past your soul as she feels your words hit her and it made you regret them after a second.

"i didn't mean tha-" you tried to apologize but she was faster.

"no, you know what? you're right. i spend my friday nights with my pathetic journal but at least i don't pretend to be someone i'm not just to make a boy like me." she takes a step closer and this time her voice is low and tamed. "at least i'm not weak and don't attach myself to the first person who offers just a hint of interest on me cause i'm desperate for attention."

her sharp words sink in, eating you from the inside out. she doesn't seem sorry and you don't feel bad anymore. you feel your jaw clenching and tears were welling up on your eyes while you stand up from your bed, face to face with your best friend.

"fuck you." you struggled to speak through the lump in your throat.

the room got quiet and the sorrow was almost palpable. shauna's pupils were teary, fully dilated and unusually darker, regarded with disappointment. she didn't say a word before leaving your room and shutting the door behind her.

you couldn’t think of anything while collapsing into your bed, sobbing against the pillow, other than how badly you hated vanilla ice cream.

[💌]

barely able to sleep last night, you were distracted by shauna’s words and the fact that this was the first serious fight that you two had ever shared. shauna didn’t talk much about her feelings and would let everything merge together until she was bursting out with anger or a bunch of passive aggressive comments but she was never too harsh on you.

you knew you had to apologize and fix things with her. even though her words weren’t exactly the kindest, she was just worried about you, you thought. you wondered if she liked jeff in secret and was jealous of him even if she had never mentioned him before.

you weren’t sure if she had feelings for jeff but you weren’t sure if you did. he could be a jerk sometimes and definitely too self centered but he made you feel important. he liked you enough to know your favorite food, even though he called it childish, and your favorite movies, that he thought it were too weird for a girl, and your favorite books, that he mentioned how boring they were.

yes, he was decent and overall, compared to the others, he was a nice person. but then, as you were in the bathroom getting ready this morning, you remembered that he wasn’t the first person to ever care

you remembered when shauna showed up at your door once at 3am when you couldn’t sleep, way too worried about finals, with your favorite treats and a book of hers that reminded her of you. or when she spent an entire month learning how to draw daisies because you loved them and she wanted to give you a special handmade gift. a week later, your room was filled with drawings of different sizes of your favorite flower. there was even a small piece taped to the wall of your bathroom right next to the mirror.

then, it occurred to you that, once while watching romeo and juliet late at night, you mentioned how much you loved romantic gestures like receiving letters from the person you loved and shauna mocked you but then, two weeks later, you received one. it was a weird coincidence but it was there, right in front of your eyes.

you were feeling like complete shit when you stopped by your locker, already regretting leaving your bed this morning. you flinch as you see jeff magically appearing behind the small metal door with a huge creepy smile and a small bag in hands.

“i got something for you.” were the words he said before handing you the content from inside the paper bag. you weren’t expecting anything and definitely not after the shitty night you had. you were determined to break up with him but the idea of it vanished as you took a first glance at what your new gift was.

the new stephen king’s book, the green mile, right under your nose. your jaw was almost hitting the floor thanks to the beautiful cover.

“jeff… this is amazing! i’ve been wanting to read this since last week and i couldn’t find it anywhere. thank you!” you had to force your words out, too stunned to speak properly. looking away from the book, you saw how he looked genuinely happy with your reaction.

“it was nothing. i just like paying attention to my girl.” you ignored the smug tone and focused on the book.

jeff didn’t wait any longer for you to finish your appreciation moment and pulled in for a kiss, tightly holding onto your waist. he hugged you right after and while you were resting your head on his shoulder, he was looking at shauna right behind you two.

greeting her from a distance with a satisfied and arrogant grin was his way of saying thank you. shauna resentfully nodded and ignored the feeling of drowning in her own emotions as she watched you leave with his arm around your waist.

quickly, she placed the receipt from the bookstore in her backpack along with her notebook and favorite writing pen before disappearing into the crowded hallway.

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #shauna shipman x reader

[koolades-world]

i saw the cat and corvid mc ones and i wanna see dog-like mc so bad, like one whos very loyal, loves cuddling with loved ones, if they had a tail and one of the gang came home itd be faster than a helicopter i think, if they see anyone with food theyd just come up to them with their puppy dog eyes, they just lounge around in random spots nearby the characters or even lays their head/body on them. sometimes theyll be playing with something and be possessive over it and a "Whats that in your mouth" situation comes in and they run away taking random stuff they found lying around the HoL, maybe theyre also rly playful and love playfighting and stuff like tug of war

thats just a few things that come off the top of my head lol how the mc is like is up to you, sorry if theres too much or doesnt make sense! xoxo

haha hi!!! yes of course!

this is such a fun idea. i may or may not have based this reader off my goofy goober of a dog. she's so sweet but sometimes i wonder if theres even a single thought in that head of hers haha

enjoy <3

Dog-like Mc

Lucifer

getting lock out of his bedroom always proceeds as such: being sad that you're locked out, sitting sadly in front of the door and scratching at it, lucifer feeling bad and eventually letting you in so you can sit on his bed and ruin the freshly made sheets lol

rinse and repeat the cycle nightly

the puppy dog eyes work very well on him

since he handles his brothers so often, he's good at getting you to listen when you're off in lala land or something along those lines

Mammon

he himself is kinda dog like, so the two of you get along pretty well

both of you would follow the other to the worlds end <33

you probably steal his sunglasses from time to time and he has to hunt you down to get them back, just because when he said “drop it” you accepted that as a challenge lol

the only difference in the two of you, however, is that you’re much more open with how you feel and will not hesitate to admit that you love him even if it flustered him haha

Levi

he's a little wary of having you in his room

he has lots of valuables that he treasures and while he's a little afraid you'll steal and or mess something up, he genuinely cares about you and is willing to get past that

however he did need a day away from you after you drooled on his Ruri pillow haha

after he got to know you better, he really appreciated always having an outgoing buddy to go out in public with someone that wasn't one of his brothers

Satan

sitting with him while he reads!! randomly laying your head in his lap <3

you always check out what's in his mug while he reads despite the fact that it never changes (it's always tea) but maybe one day it'll be something delicious, like chips haha

he's wary of taking you into a cat cafe, but surprisingly, all the cats love you!

now he's questioning if he's really a cat, or if he's a dog person lol

Asmo

you let him do any kind of skincare and treatments he wants on you

and he thinks it's great! until he sees you at the end of the day and it kinda looks like you swam in a mud puddle

he's not going to be the one to subject you to a bath so he always shoos you off and tells you to go clean up before you can get something else done (my dog hates water lol)

if he's ever missing one of his rather tasty smelling skincare products or a brush, or something like that, he just opens a bag of chips and summons you + beel (see below lol)

Beel

please the amount of food you're getting from him

those puppy dog eyes work so well and he can't help but give in every single time

both of you come running every time someone opens a chip bag even if it's on the other side of the house haha. if the others have issues finding you, that's how they do it quick and easy

every meal of yours is eaten together, of course

Belphie

the realest cat and dog dynamic ever!

please there's no way you're not jumping on his bed just for fun while he's sleeping in it. he's convinced it's to annoy him but it's just you being incredible oblivious and wanting to have fun

you guys are best friends. i don't make the rules haha

when you do want to nap with him, however, it's the best nap you've ever had and is probably a very cute pic

#sorry this is so late!! #been feeling kinda under the weather and swore i had something ready to post haha #obey me #obey me! #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me levi #obey me belphie #obey me mammon #obey me beel #obey me lucifer #obey me x reader

[beomnoullitheorem]

In The Middle Of The Night

𖥔 Non-idol AU — Boyfie!Kai × Girlfie!Reader

𖥔 Appetizer — Your boyfriend gets needy at night, he starts using your cunt. Little does he know, you're awake and you're gonna let him fuck you, even at such an odd hour since you can't resist him.

𖥔 Disclaimer — This is PURE FICTION : Nothing in this work aligns with the idols' character, moral and their real life. The characters are all legal adults (18+) and everything happening around & to them is entirely consensual. Readers are humbly advised to read the Contains and Disclaimer before they read.

𖥔 Word Count — 3.9k+

𖥔 Contains — NSFW content = smut, so MDNI! Submissive!Service-Top!Kai, Soft-Dominant!Reader, Lazy sex ( not really ), SOMNOPHILIA, Unprotected Sex, praise kink, PIV sex, petnames, a little of lovey-dovey sex, implied heavy sleeper reader and pervy!Kai, kisses ( like KISSES ), cock warming ( I mean A LOTS OF IT as Kai stays in her for a long time ), mentions of submissive!Kai and dominant!reader, a little of rough sex, squirting ( ? ), sweet cuddles at end

𖥔 Author's Note — I- I don't know why I got this idea or anything but idea of a reader who gives in any of submissive!Kai's whims and praises him is what that literally encouraged me to write this. I just don't know if people will like this kind of thing.

Kai turns and adjusts. It is still to no avail. He counts numbers, hoping it would all wash away, the sudden insomniac exhilaration rushing through his ( cock ) veins. He wonders how you're so relaxed and so dead to the world, right beside him, which has become a problem for him. Right beside him is not it. Sleeping like that is. Under the dim golden light of the lamp that outlined the white shirt of Kai's you have almost fought him to wear after bathing just because you procrastinated to wear your pieces of garments because the shirt is actually so comfortable than those. The long shirt which reaches below your pelvis, resting lewdly well on your body and hanging till your thighs, a perfect short dress it makes. It is exactly what that's curled up and... I see and feel it all, everyday. But why is her pussy looking so tempting?

The plumpy ass of yours and your freshly bathed velvety pussy are highlighted on display as the shirt slid up in your slumber, so dead to the world as you sleep on your stomach and have parted your legs to your full comfort, turning your back and ass on Kai, and doing a lot of torment to him. What could he do to sleep right now? He was sure, he only meant to adore you. He is sure now, he only wants you to adorably help him with this. The wide-awakened exhilaration is rushing in his cock veins, transforming him into the needy man you always cherish and tend to.

The swarm of dirty and unusual thoughts compel him to wonder if you would notice when he devours a little of your pussy. He sits up and looks at your frame, legs flawlessly split and welcoming his need at this odd hour when the whole world have probably hit the hay or is getting laid. Your hair is a mess, your head turning away from him and yet all the craving he feels, gets him to memorize your lovely figure, sleeping soundly... Shame possesses him for fantasizing so lewdly of your serene, resting figure, but before this shame could possess, his excitement took over him and in the blink of eye, he strips himself off his trousers and oversized black T-shirt.

It will be okay, she'll be asleep and I'll fall asleep once I use it.. she won't notice. It takes a lots of time and persistent nagging in your ears to wake you up. Sleeping is something you have always taken pleasure in, something that gives you beauty and peace. And as time passed by, your slumber has become a hassle for you and everyone around you. It would take numerous alarms at intervals of every 10 - 15 minutes before you could wake up. There are times where you were late to work and events. Your slumber does take you to a dimension where in here, it is completely difficult to wake you up.

'A heavy sleeper' is what he labeled you for your dead antics in your sleep. Kai does what he intends to, his big palms hold your soft, pliant body and turn you over; you're still sleeping on your back as soundly as ever, unfazed with all the movements happening to your body. His hands start working and they knead your thighs, the movements of his hands soothe you more to your sleep but the same hands which traverse to your asleep cunt and clit, his fingers leave trails of feathery touches to your folds and your sensual clit. Goosebumps erupt on your thighs and alerts of greedy and luring soft pinches dancing on your forbidden clit does a little perturbation to your brain. Do his touches not affect you in even in sleep, for your body completely designed to be his, your steady and soft breathing halts and grows heavy and your body experiences the sweating atmosphere leaving you a little breathless in your slumber.

Kai is hypnotized at the way your body pulsates at slight ministrations, he is wholly awestruck. He now harbors no intentions of waking you up but watch you grow hot in sleep at his servicing touches at your clit. He barely presses and toys with the bud and a soft, low whimper echoes from your quiet snores. Kai is utterly smitten and he doesn't intend to stop. His touches, his comforting touch could ship you to the oceans of congenial dreams without bothering you in any discomfort as it is only made to soothe you to your glee and now, his lecherous touch leaving you in borders of consciousness and unconsciousness, the hot air in your room fanning your body and the unholy thoughts creeping in your mind, visualizing a few of dirty scenarios with a blurred man. Kai affects you infectiously. Whines escape your mouth and your slumber is interrupted.

Your eyes wing open and all you wish to do is go back to sleep. That is, until you feel a lots of illegal fingers caressing your entrances as though it were a delicate thing; Kai is completely unaware you're growing conscious as seconds pass by and he bites the bullet as he slips one of his fingers in your dreaming cunt. So warm and semi-wet has it become, Kai's cock starts pulsating from the comfort he is feeling on his fingers. His other hand which owed to tend to your clit starts rubbing the nub, his finger pad moving in circular, the excitement building through the stimulation he is providing clenches your cunt as he drives in another finger in and they devour all the delicious contractions. It is really a wonder to Kai, how you're being so lewd when you're cutely asleep; unaware of your awakeness as he is moving his fingers following the pace of his other hand which is dealing with your clit.

She is so cute like this. Kai's fingers are barely in a pace as they sluggishly pump in short thrusts, with an intention to not wake you up and yet get you wet. Kai has no idea where he's got such boldness from but can't he just enjoy his sleeping girlfriend eho is so sexy asleep? His fingerpads magically transmit a lot of pleasure to your body and your half-awakeness vanishes. Your eyes flutter wide open and you look down to see what's going on between your legs.

Kai is concentrated on stimulating your clit and prepping your cunt which starts moistening as his movements gather a little amount of speed where his hands work perfectly right, for your snoring breath finally turning into a soft whiny one. Kai once again decides to look at your heated state in sleep and your eyes shut asleep the moment his bold yet shy gaze falls on your not so relaxed face secretly. Kai feels too excited within himself for getting to see a salacious sight like this. Something he never dreamed of getting to look at and is he not enticed with every ounce of it, he gulps and gets back to his dirty little errand.

Kai fingers halt when the wetness comes to his fingers while pumping in and out of your pussy as secretly as possible, and his fingers on your clit stop tending to it; your whole breathing steadies when he pulls his fingers out. What he is unknown of is that you're clenching around nothing and awaiting his dick and you're ogling at him as secretly as possible. Kai is naked, just as you ask of him everytime when you both do the nasty. His body, his neck, his heart ( tits ), his innocent yet mischievous face... a smile of wholehearted adoration graces your lips to all of his frame, which Kai couldn't notice as he is jerking off looking at your delicious, welcoming cunt. Closing his eyes and fondling his length while he strokes it as intensely as possible, smearing the pre-cum dripping out of it as he lets out one of the most sinful and low sounds so sincerely at just the moistened sight of your cunt. Kai is hypnotizing, even for you who just woke up and are taking in whatever he bestowed, you let out a few whimpers and wait for him to slide in.

Kai takes one last glimpse at gracious 'asleep' body and aligns his tip along your cunt. A girthy, wet tip prods at your quivering cunt as his cock and he absorb all the trembles that your pussy and your body exude at the intrusion. He sheathes himself as slowly as ever, you cunt embracing his length as if it have waited forever for the warmth of his cock. Kai's finding it hard to not shove into you, a saccharine groan of delight echoes with the same replica leaving out of your mouth with your eyes closed. Kai's swimming in your warmth as he is bottoming out, unwitting that you're whining along with him in sheer delight of getting filled by his stuffing girth. Kai's hands grab your thighs and pull you closer, Kai rolls his eyes back and looks up, exhaling a few moans out. Your pussy probably can not take the desperation, you squeeze him in an attempt to convey that he better start moving through the communication with your pussy. Kai only moans forgetting everything else.

Kai looks at your shirt crumbled up in a mess, he starts unbuttoning the shirt as he hovers over you, and exposing your fresh scented torso and your perky boobs with the soft nipples. His hands grab a handful of your breast and knead them. It is getting harder to contain yourself from the way he hasn't did much but you're dying for more inside. How freaky and exciting did Kai seem for the things he's been doing to you in your sleep, you swear you didn't think it would make you fall for him more. Ugh.. He can't stuff my cunt and play with my tits when I'm dying for him to move.. his hands doing wonders to your boob and nipple, and his still cock, pulsing at your cute, 'unconscious' reactions according to him. This is not getting any better or relieving, the needy anguish in your stomach only begs for more, he best end what he started now.

"You better s-start moving or else no pussy f-from tomorrow."

A throaty croak of a threat shrills out of your mouth for Kai not moving, which trembles him from his head to toe, even his cock is surprised as it twitches, and Kai follows the voice, his eyeballs curve out, his whole face loses its colour in horror. When did she wake up? Was she awake the whole time? Why didn't she make a noise? Why did she decided to tell something now? Will she feel bad when I tried to help myself a little? Will she never forgive me? Kai's throat runs dry and he finds himself at a loss to speak. What should he do at this possible moment? Should he just start fucking or apologize for using your cunt? His Adam's apple bobs at your state– a cheery grin widens your lips the moment you feel him looking at you; your eyelids still droopy, making your marble-like pupils barely visible; they form a crescent from the way you're adoring your boyfriend.

Kai is only scared, ashamed and guilty from the way you smile at his so naively. His face says it all, the sincere mischievousness he has had in himself when he was stimulating you in your sleep has vanished. Kai could ruin the mood and before he could, your hands fly to his cheeks and pull him in a sweet, reassuring kiss. His hot lips meet yours and all the laziness from the sleepiness evaporates at the way they unite with yours and the rush of neediness and exhilaration through your body only heats you up, for your tongue demanding a permission to his lips with an intention to devour his tongue. Kai can barely move a muscle at this kiss, he gives in and lets your tongue in. His tongue follows your movements and tastes you like it is what he knows merely at the way it has grow light headed. You pull away, "It's okay." And smash your lips at his.

Naughty and excited warmth of both love and lust bloom in Kai; the butterflies in his stomach going at carnage, as your mouths move in coordination and your tongues lick eachothers', his hot breath tickles your cheeks as he inclines his head to kiss you deeper, it only makes you breathless and starved. Kai's hand that stood on the bed moves to your cheek, soothing the supple skin and moving down to your jaw, palming your side neck as his fingers lose their sense of location in your hair. The kiss has its own way of working you both to your mutual delight so naturally that you ravish his lips like they own yours and you have to use them full.

What is so much more exciting is that, Kai, is on top– top of you. He insists on being under when you fantasize of him devouring you as you lay under, only for his lips to cast magical kisses at your body and then, your cunt. You yearn to look at his hanging dark hair which brush your skin now, you wish to look at his eyes completely down, locked in yours. This sight of Kai you're picturing, is exactly what that's actualized. But... his kisses, his air, his touch, his sounds transmitted into yours.. they have no buisness in tiring you again, when you're alive and kicking after waking to such a sensual alarm which didn't wish you a good morning but bless such a good cock. His kiss sucks all your strength in as you can't open your eyes at it; the feeling of the kiss still so alive melting all the consciousness in you away.

Kai is short of breath, as he abruptly parts from your lips. He breathes briskly and quietly, his face still inches away and your panting breath combines with his as you finally become aware of how desperately you were sucking his mouth. Though Kai has steadied his breath, it has taken him a brief while to open his eyes and look at you, who is still in an awe as you do not yet open eyes and look at him. It still isn't that easy to open your eyes, his hand rests on your jaw with tickling pressure which doesn't yet give any strength, your closed eyelids twitch and then open, they parade Kai, sweating and red from the heat. His eyes still sift, as they exude a lots of questions. You know exactly what, he's horny and you will help him.

"I can't sleep when your cock is in me, Kai." Your small voice, filled with honeyed tone and breathy words as they escape your mouth so cutely. Kai smiles shyly at your words; a perfect mix of heart and cock warming words. His heart flutters at the way you are not angry at him and let him do whatever he could, completely down bad. As if this is not enough, your hands find his neck and entangle their as your plant a chaste peck on his forehead as you permit him, "You can do whatever, you know right? Use me however, Love." Your smile is graciously infectious, Kai is flustered and is he not whipped, he vows to make you feel good.

His cock pulses inside, excited at the permission. It wouldn't have been so exciting if you were asleep but of course, your moans as your pussy fucks on his dick- he knows that's the best part– to witness you singing in pleasure so mellifluously at his movements. His dick has been in you for a long time, it better start working or Kai might explode. "I'm moving, Y/n," states Kai as he slowly pulls out, the hold on his cock so compact that both of you couldn't hold your moans in. It is leaving your cunt, so lonely it feels inside that you know it through your bones, if he doesn't go back in, you'll be whoring yourself out to him, at this point. Kai, can't be so addictive but he is, you feel it. The way his cock leaves your cunt, it's too painful to have it so empty, the feeling actually making you lose your conscience as you whine as an entitled brat in a demanding way. Kai gets you. Kai can not endure the high, though his cockhead is still in you, he knows he best push inside. Kai's hands slip under your thigh as they grip, the hands perfectly on your thighs and his cock is the next thing pushed inside with the help his hold provides.

Kai's movements are not so perfect but cervix-knocking, everytime he starts pushing in, his cock knocking the breath outside of you. Your body jiggles in unison with his thrusts even when your hands grip the sheets. Strength deserts your whole body at the way Kai is using your pussy, the only movement you know you are able to do is clench on his cock, his heat that transmits in you everytime he pounds in, your body can only take it. "F-Fuck so good, Kai-"

Your little praise does a lot of favour to Kai, his movements quicken and his hips work in such a way his balls slap your ass with such a slick sound, your pussy only making the wet sounds more amiably melodious as Kai's cock collides in it easily as it only pools a lot of slick, leaking fluids. His movements actually grow harder and faster as his cock slips in due to the wetness, Kai can only go along how his cock drives him. He begins to explore your spots angling his cock at different places, as he hits numerous spots. Tears cascade down your cheeks in pleasure at constant pounding on your spots inside, no other surrounding could come to any existence in your eyes. You can only feel Kai inside of you so good that each and have never expected every vein on his feeble, huge cock that weeped for your touch and pussy could have you shedding tears and loud noises from your mouth which you always do, but these noises that shed from your mouth at the way he is fucking into you so carefully, your voice box can only grow sore merely at it; his quest comes to no end, at the way you're crying and begging to not stop; the high so pleasuring and incessant.

Kai's movements do not relent, not even in a tiny bit. Sweat beads form on his head and his voice synchronizes with yours, until he finds your spot and has you clenching and screaming at his accurate thrust. He continually crashes his cock at it so purposely. You are right, having you under is exactly the best thing as he gets to see you cry, beg and moan under him. He should perhaps continue this, though he feels completely abashed, debauched and happy at the way he's getting to fuck you even at such odd hours, so motivated is he for trying so many of new stuff on you. "D-Don't clench like that haah-! I can't l-last more." Kai could barely get this out when he is actually extracting so much noise out of you. You know, you're fucked completely when the pleasure is actually sparking up so much and you pull him in closer using your legs, which only pushes Kai deeper in you. You're trying your best not to clench at him, it's his cock so fat and so good that you can't stop yourself from clenching and feeling him all. Your boyfriend is a freak in the bed, and this fact only makes you clench onto him more. More for release.

Kai's close, as you clench hard at him. He's been with a hard dick for like god knows how long and he could snap at any moment, just like you, who is dangerously close as his thrusts did not just go in and out of you, they explode your mind at each and every one of them, as the room grows hotter and your fingers curl so hard into your palms, digging your nails into your own hold. Your back arches and you could barely even moan properly at Kai's movements getting sloppy and desperate, as the gush of his cum, accumulating in his length to spurt out makes it grow oversensitive as his pace slows and grows sloppy, even that would not stop Kai from getting you to cum as his hands find your clit and you could say 'caress' but his fingers move so quickly on your bud, making you witness electric bolts infront your eyes and make you wail and beg for more and more, clenching around his cock.

He could not take the tight clench of your soft gummy walls kissing at his delicate weeping cock, making him witness stars as his composure weakens at the overwhelming waves of pleasure hitting him as he whines loudly and spurts all his cum inside of you. The warm fluids spill inside of you as his cock buries deep inside and his fingers lose their momentum on your clit, the strong twists and turns in your stomach stop as in some knots snapped, you choke his cock in your cunt, your toes curl and your hands bring in the sheets as your entangled legs push him towards yourself further, a long moan echoes from the core of your voice box and you're creaming his cock followed by a huge splash of your orgasm wrecking you. You're still swimming in that hot, releasing delight, unable to relax as the pleasure still collapses your each vein and cell; you're still in the moment and arched.

Kai falls in love with the quivering torso of yours followed by your orgasm with your face expressioned in overwhelmedness, he looks at you like there is nothing in this world except you. His cock finally softens and he relaxes as he pulls out, his hovers over you as places a soft kiss at your lips and then, forehead. "That was so hot, sweetheart." His gruff voice is toned low as it echoes only in your ears as you relax and open your eyes at his kiss. You smile at him as you pull him in your embrace, Kai loses his balance plops on you. You turn him to side and snuggle in his embrace. Your hand wrap his body and he lets you in; his hands combing your hair in adoration.

"Happy fucking me In The Middle Of The Night?" You shoot a curious look punctuated with a teasing smile creased on your face to which he smiles as in his lips have to form one, when they see yours smiling ( or kissing haha ).

"Very much." Kai pulls the blanket on top of you both as he brings you closer and switches off the lamp. "Let's sleep, Baby."

You rest you head on his hands as you adjust yourself according to that and scoot in his embrace, his hands secure your back and he closes his eyes to sleep. "Good night, Kai," you wish him. "I love you."

"Love you more, darling."

—THE END.

𖥔 Taglist — @taesxck @soobabby @niningtori @minsikvi

-> I made a taglist recently. If you wanna be added to it, do fill out this form <3

#txt smut #txt hard thoughts #txt hard hours #txt x y/n #txt x oc #txt x reader #txt x you #txt fanfic #hyuka hard thoughts #hyuka hard hours #hyuka x reader #hyuka smut #huening kai x y/n #huening kai x you #huening kai smut #huening kai x reader #txt imagines #huening kai imagines

[jasper-rolls]

the experience i've had of swifties is. very strange, i'll say that much. i mean i'm nearly 30 so i've witnessed more than a few pop zeitgeist fandoms at this point, and it's easily possible i've flattened out the bieber/one direction fandoms in my mind but i don't remember there being the same kind of anxiety there is among swifties

like. they want to feel superior because their chosen favourite musical artist is on top of the world, she is the most popular mainstream singer of the moment. but there's this insecurity at the heart of it that i can't figure out - is it shame for being appeased by bland mediocrity? i don't know - that makes them want to feel like oppressed underdogs in spite of being literally being the poster children for mainstream conformity, so we get this...weird unhinged behaviour about her where Actually You Have To Have A Very High IQ To Understand The Tortured Poet's Department (again, probably the most popular and high selling album of the moment)

[x-liv25-jamieswife]

Can you make some sad libby headcanons? I swear all your other sad headcanons made me cry😭

sad libby head canons

YES! libby is literally the fucking best and she's so underrated. trigger warning for self-harm, suicidal thoughts/attempts, eating disorders, and sexual assault. hope you like them <3.

she used to apologize to her mother after she would hit her (in tig she says her mother used to hit her when she was stressed)

she's been self-harming since she was like 12. she used the blade in her pencil sharpener and cut the tops of her thighs (you can't see them even when she wears shorts)

drake convinced her that him SAing her was out of love, and that he knew she 'wanted' it so she should stop complaining. she'd be the one who ended up apologizing to him after he'd assault her

in high school, because of how tough things were at home, she used to do drugs (she had this really bad group of friends that sort of influenced her) (she didn't get addicted to the drugs though, if was more of a once in a while thing when she couldn't handle her life anymore)

at some point, her mom was doing really badly financially, and they were forced to move into a smaller one bedroom apartment. libby thought her mom deserved the bed bc she worked so hard so she slept on the floor.

she's so used to people hitting her that it doesn't even hurt anymore. when someone does, she sort of dissociates in order to not feel anything.

her mom used to tell her she was overweight (she was literally underweight, her mom was just jealous). libby then developed an eating disorder (bulimia)

the ED was sort of an on and off thing for her. every once in a while, she'd get the idea in her head that she was overweight and ugly and should do smth about it, but, then, avery or one of her friends would help her get better.

the reason she's drawn to men like drake is bc it's the only thing she's familiar with. her mom was a piece of shit too, so for her its what's normal/what she deserves (this is less of a head canon and more psychology but eh)

she'll do anything anyone asks of her. she can't say no even if it makes her uncomfortable/she doesn't have the time/doesn't like that person.

she sometimes gets so mad at the world that she punches walls until her bones almost break.

she hates getting mad at people bc she reminds herself of her mother.

she's terrified of becoming a mother (even though she wants to be one) bc she's convinced herself that she'll be like her mom, if not worse.

her mom used to get mad at her for ricky (her father) leaving. so much so that libby started blaming herself for it

drake used to tell libby that if she didn't let him have his way with her, he'd hurt avery. libby, of course, didn't want that so she would let him do awful things to her.

she hates taking baths bc drake used to waterboard her (if you don't know what that is, search it up)

when libby used to do things her mom didn't approve of/like (mistakes all children make and learn from like spilling a glass of milk), she would deny libby basic needs like food, water, a bed to sleep in etc.

idk if this one will make sense (it makes sense to me but idk), but libby dyes her hair a new color very often bc its a way for her to start anew. like lets say she breaks up with drake again and she hates herself for getting back together with him in the first place, she dyes her hair a new color to signify the beginning of a new era.

she will literally break her back to please people/be the person they want her to be. if they think she talks to much, she'll stop talking, etc (people's opinions of her matter a lot to her)

tw prob one of the darkest hcs i've ever written: libby ended up in the hospital once bc she slit her wrists trying to off herself. this happened right before she took avery in. the doctors didn't think she'd make it.

she'd considered offing herself multiple times before and after the last hc, but she doesn't bc just the thought of it makes her feel guilty. she doesn't want people to cry over her bc she thinks she doesn't deserve their tears, and she doesn't want to leave people she wants to help

she insists everyone get therapy but herself bc, to her, other people matter more

the only thing that brought her comfort as a child was this stuffed bunny. she used to press it to her wounds bc it would dull the pain (this might not make sense but whenever i get hurt (cause im ass clumsy bitch), putting pressure on the wound dulls the pain). she also found comfort in how soft it was.

drake threw that bunny away cause he thought it was worthless. libby told nash about this and he searched the entire fucking country until he found that damn stuffed bunny (idk how he did but he's a hawthorne so...)

when she has panic attacks, she'll either be very silent/still in a corner or she'll be clawing/pulling at anything around her (including herself)

she didn't do well in school not bc she wasn't smart but bc the students and teachers were so creepy towards her (would harass her constantly) that she felt uncomfortable even stepping into the school

absolutely hates it when drunk people interact with her/get too close to her bc whenever drake got drunk, he'd hit her

hannah's death hit her hard too. they were actually much closer than people thought they were. hannah helped her through a lot of shitty things that happened in her life. she would visit her grave every once in a while to tell her she wished she was still here bc her life (and avery's) was absolutely shit without her. she would breakdown in the middle of the graveyard every time

whenever she felt like hurting herself but didn't have a blade nearby, she would dig her fingernails into the already existing wounds to make them bleed again.

drake once beat her up so bad she ended up in the hospital with brain swelling and a fractured arm. the swelling in her brain was so bad they didn't know if she'd make it out alive.

here's a happy libby head canon to (hopefully) make it all better:

she used to be this supervisor at a daycare when she was younger (that's probably not even a thing but lets pretend it is). the kid would make her drawings all of the time with hearts and proposals and stuff. she loved the kids so much, she would hug every single one of them and bake them cupcakes. they were literally her best friends, and some of them still send her messages through their mom/dad (she would befriend their parents and give them her number/email)

not proof read bc i'm a lazy ass bitch. i say this in every post, but pls talk to someone if you need help (if there's no one in your life you can talk to, contact a helpline). sending lots of love to everyone <3.

#the inheritance games #jameson hawthorne #grayson hawthorne #avery grambs #nash hawthorne #xander hawthorne #libby grambs

[empressgeekt]

Trolls - Accidental Knight and the Time Travel Bodyswap

okay I'm on moble. So apologies in advance.

I recently found a fic on Ao3 about brozone swapping bodies with their younger-selves (specifically during the split up fight) with what I'm guessing is their post TBT selves. I link it when I have the time.

Here's my taken on this awesome concept. In the Field of Forgetmenots AU! Highly recommend looking at the posts for this au before reading on ward. You have been warned.

The plot starts with Floyd's POV. He's in the background of his brothers fighting after Branch's first show. Part of him wants to intervene but at this point he knows it will do nothing. He sees little Bitty standing off the side looking terrified, as he walks over to comfort the young trolling, his vision twists and blacks out. He comes too with a dirt ceiling overhead, with a numb body. He thinks he's been drugged by a crazed fan then kidnapped, and tries to get off the bed he's on only to fall to the floor when his limbs begin to burn with pain. He's found by a green trolling with blue hair and eyes, and he struggles on floor finally seeing the paleness of his limbs and paralyses he feels. A scarred dulled troll comes in. It takes a moment of his fussing for Floyd to realize that he's staring at his grown up baby brother. His grown up baby brother who lifts him with ease and sets him on the bed while checking over his body.

Branch was worried when Keith came running in saying that Floyd fell. The Knight had taken in his older brother (plus Clay) to help Floyd recover from the damage the diamond bottle did to him. Its been a few months and sadly Floyd is still weak and adjusting to the after effects. He can't walk, unable to keep himself warm, and has flare ups when his body re-crystalizes, that for all they know could be fatal. Not to mention, all the psychological damage the kidnapping did, and Floyd insisting that he's fine when he's really not. Needless to say, when Keith comes to tell Branch that Floyd is on the floor panicking, he reacts with urgency. The knight drops what he's doing (making breakfast), and rushes to tend to his brother he runs through all the checks, Flare up? Nope. Nightmare? Doesn't seem like it. He doesn't feel any injuries. However, Branch is extremely concerned when Floyd starts talking like he's confused about the date and how big Branch got. He makes a plan to take Floyd to the hospital to get checked out.

Let's switch gears over to Clay. He's first in heated fight with John and Spruce when his world becomes fuzzy and suddenly he's waking up with his face on top of a work desk. He jerks up, finding himself in an office. A boring office. A troll walks in, calls him "Mr. Clay" says their his assistant and ask if he's okay before telling him about Branch taking Floyd to to hospital so he might need to pick up Keith from school that day, then they leave. Clay is left with many many questions, but it's okay on top of sad books he's read many mystery novels he's fully prepared to handle this. If this was his office it had to have a calendar. He is not pleased to find the date is over twenty years passed what it was a few minutes ago. Then everything that the assistant mentioned settled. Floyd was in the hospital?! Branch had to take him? Branch could take him? And who the heck was Keith?! Why was Clay picking him up from school?! During this spiral, Who of all trolls walks in but Princess Viva (or Captain Viva as he would later learn she was called). Clay asks why she's here, and he learns that Viva heard about Floyd and thought to check in on her Boyfriend. That was not the answer Clay was expecting.

Flipping back to Floyd. Hospitals already freak him out, and now he apparently had a chronic condition, that doctors still weren't sure how it works. Even worse he can see how worried Branch is over this. As such he just doesn't mention the Time travel/amnesia thing going on. Last thing he needs is to stress it baby brother out, especially since it's obvious that Branch had been taking care of Floyd since the diagnoses that he can't remember. On top of taking care of a kid no doubt. Even if Floyd isn't sure how Keith is related to them (He doesn't call Branch dad or Floyd uncle, and doing the math it would mean that Branch would have to have had Keith while he was a teenager), it's clear that Branch is raising that kid. Branch's girlfriend (doesn't that just bring many colorful images to mind) meets them at the hospital. She takes over, calming Branch down easily, and talking to the doctors, who much too everyone's relief nothing physical has changed since Floyd's last appointment. Branch has to leave for work after that, but Poppy takes Floyd back to the hideout he suddenly lives in.

Clay is left reeling, through out the day he's trying to learn all about this modern day. He'd completely forgotten about needing to collect a trolling from the school until his assistant mentions it. He runs out of the admin building looking for the school. It took a nearly twenty minutes to figure out where the school was, and by the time he arrived the teachers were getting ready to look for either him or Branch. He apologize profusely, but thankfully the head teacher assumes his questionable behavior was due to Floyd being hospitalized. Then Clay is saddled with Keith, a little Green and blue trolling that the teacher calls his brother. Clay doesn't really know where Keith came from (he thought his parents were dead), but doesn't question it out loud. He's been a big brother before he can totally take this kid home...if he knew where his new home was. No one was living with grandma now, clearly. Thankfully, Keith knows the way. Clay tries to make conversation, but Keith only really either stares blankly or looked slightly confused. Geez, didn't that make Clay feel good about his relationship with this new youngest brother. Did he ever spend time with this kid?

They arrive at the bunker, finding Poppy and Floyd inside. Keith lights up as Poppy running over and beginning to tell her about his day. Clay however, doesn't pay much attention to this red-headed version of Viva, rather he hones in on his younger brother who's in a wheelchair and looks on the brink of death. Clay demands to know what happened, while Floyd tries to deflect saying weird dream. Clay knows he's lying right away. Thankfully Poppy has pulled Keith into the kitchen to start on dinner and homework. Clay comes clean about not remembering any of the passed 20 years, Floyd breaths a sigh of relief know that it isn't his sickness that caused the memory loss.

Clay: Do you know the kind of day I had? I'm a CPA! twenty years down the line and I'm a CPA, John would hate that! It's a boring job. But I love it. and I'm dating the crown princess apparently.

Floyd: You thought your day was weird? I can't walk Clay. I've been questioning my own sanity since i woke up. Because I have a TBI and could lose my mind any second.

Clay: TBI? How'd you get a TBI?

Floyd: I don't remember. Poppy and Branch have been tip-toeing around me having some sort of accident. But they won't tell me what. and I'm scared to ask because it would make me look crazy!

Branch would come home at that point. They both are surprised by the Forest Guardian Armor, and Clay even more freaked out seeing the scars, muted colors, and blinded eye that Branch was sporting now. Keith is over joyed and greets Branch warmly. It's obvious these two are close in ways that this grown up Branch isn't with his older brothers. Dinner is served but it doesn't comfort the elder two brothers.

Why don't we check in on Vacay Island for a second. Spruce one moment was fighting with john and the next wakes up one morning next to a Giant yellow woman, who claims to be his wife. Brandy immediately figures out her husband doesn't remember the last twenty years. She explains everything to him using family photos to prove everything. Spruce is lost in confusion, as he listens he had no choice but to believe her, he certainly wasn't in his teenaged body anymore. It hurts to learn that the last night he remembered was the night his family broke apart, and only after 20 years was his brothers comfortable enough to reconnect. Then Brandy mentions that Floyd was kidnapped....suddenly Spruce, or Bruce as Brandy tells him he goes by, needs to see his little brothers. Make sure that their all okay. Brandy agrees and he wonders how on earth his heartthrobness managed to charm his goddess among mortals.

And finally let's get to the eldest. John was in his grandmother's pod, terrified and angry, then he was waking up in a transportation critter in the woods. In the mirror his older self stares back, and he's scared all over again. Time has passed but he doesn't know why or how. Thankfully he finds the journals his older self kept. He spends the day learning what had happened over the passed 20 years. He breakdown when he reads the entry talking about the empty destroyed tree. Only to relax when he reads about the reunion and freeing Floyd.

Rhonda has been watching all of this and sneses something wrong with her owner, against his will she drives strait to troll village.

Once both him and Bruce arrive at the same time and end up explaining that both have the same memory loss. Shockley learning that both Clay and Floyd are the same. Grown up Branch is weird and it hurts to learn where the main scar came from. Floyd is horrifying to his older brothers, they just want to bundle him up and never let anyone touch him. they all talk in Floyd's room about what they need to to do to get their memories back...none of them notice Keith is listening from behind the cracked door.

Branch confronts them at dinner that night. It isn't pretty. Branch is not going to put up with the "We're trying to protect you" routine. And to their shock, takes charge of the room, saying that he and them already had that fight about that topic, and how he doesn't need them anymore. He had Poppy and Keith, and the only reason that Floyd is staying here because branch knows he can't take care of himself. He'll help them, but he won't tolerate arguing. they need to settle their teenaged issues with each other. Because if Keith has to deal with their fights like Branch had to endure, he'd kick them all out.

I'm not sure about how the ending would work yet, but all the brothers would be brought back to the moment they left. And vowed to stay together as a family. In one time line, Branch would have the brothers he deserved.

#fanfic #trolls branch #canon divergent au #branch x poppy #dreamworks trolls #fic planning #trolls #trolls floyd #trolls john dory #trolls au #trolls bruce #trolls clay #clay x viva #trolls keith #Field of forgetmenots au #time travel #broppy #brozone #body swap

[kittencomicslol]

Awake at night again unable to sleep. Decided to write another snuggle/comfort fic with Gyutaro but this time w demon Gyutaro!! Hooray :3

No TW’s, it’s literally just more tooth rotting fluff. It’s a little short but it’s nice. Did my best to spell check this one too but Y’know I was sleepy so if there’s any errors just lmk >_<

With a small little huff, Gyutaro laid down next to you on the bed. It had been a rather long day… Daki handled a Hashira rather immaturely. Though everything ended up fine after Gyutaro came quickly to defend her, and their secretive location didn’t get it out, it was still upsetting for Gyutaro. He tried to explain to Daki that she needed to be more careful about dealing with high ranking slayers and per usual, Daki got upset and whined about how he needed to let her be ‘more independent’.

Gyutaro didn’t try to push much since the last thing he would ever wanna do is upset his dear little sister, but he was still rightfully annoyed after their fight.

“Hey..”

You spoke out softly, your voice ringing in his ears in a way he could only describe as comforting. Somehow, your presence was always able to help him calm down even when in a fit of blind rage, and oh how he loved you so for it.

Gyutaro was still upset, and since he didn’t know how to properly handle or express his feelings he just let out an angry huff as he kept his back turned to you. Fortunately for him you knew him well enough to understand what was going on and how to help.

You weren’t pushy, and you didn’t ask him a bunch of questions or berate him. You simply scooted closer, gently wrapping your arms around his thin body and resting your head against his back. Gyutaros heart ached.

He loved how sweet you always were with him, how you handled him so gently as if he were the most precious thing in the world. He loved you dearly and if there was one thing he didn’t want, it was for you to be uncomfortable. He hated being the little spoon when you cuddled or having you up against his back. He knew his body wasn’t perfect.. he didn’t exactly mind. He was proud of his ugliness and how much of a monster he was, but he still knew that it would be less appealing to touch. He knew you claimed it was fine but he didn’t want you to be uncomfortable due to his weird protruding bony spine or hips.

He grumbled slightly, flipping over and gently pulling you against his chest. He made sure to not bring you too close though, out of fear his ribs might make you uncomfortable. But you didn’t seem to mind all that much when you gladly snuggled yourself up against him, resting your head against his weird skinny chest.

Gyutaro didn’t think he would ever fully comprehend how or why you were so comfortable with his deformed hideous body.. but it’s not like he was upset at you for it. If anything, he was impressed and thankful that someone could actually love him. He had grown up accepting the fact he would always be alone and became content with making Daki his top priority.. but then you came along.

Gyutaro grumbled, nothing coherent or of meaning; just a habit he had when thinking about something or having overwhelming feelings. He wanted to scratch himself since even thinking about the fact you loved him overwhelmed his senses.. but he didn’t. He wanted to keep you safe and comfortable, and right now that consisted of holding you close.

“It’s nice to see you, Gyutaro.. seems like you had a long day, hm?..”

Your voice was something he would never get used to either. But that wasn’t a bad thing at all, because he would never get tired of how soothing it was. He huffed in an upset manner and nodded slightly, seeming to be in a frustrated almost nonverbal state.

He was glad you never pushed when he was upset, because even if he knew he wouldn’t ever lash out or harm you because he loves you too much, he still got frustrated from questions when he was upset. He always found them so hard to answer when he was overwhelmed which only always caused a spiral into more anger.

A content sigh escaped the demon's lips as he felt your hand gently run along his back in a tender manner, selfishly indulging into all of the pampering you gave him despite his knowledge he did not deserve such love. It was only natural after all.

“Well, don’t worry.. we don’t have anything to do at all tonight… we can just relax.. sounds good?”

Simple yes or no questions were always better in moderation during such situations, especially if it was context to help him settle down. Gyutaro let out a grunt and nodded again, giving you a slight squeeze while keeping you held close.

You couldn’t help but smile, grateful he was trusting enough of you to confide in your comforts when he felt vulnerable. Hell, he didn’t even do this sort of thing with Daki.. he didn’t want her to think he was weak or unfit to protect her. Besides, Gyutaro knew very well she was just too young and immature to properly understand or handle his complex feelings. Gyutaro still loved Daki dearly and allowed her to confide in him when she was upset, but he never wanted to stress her. He only ever wanted the best for her, willing to overwork and stress himself to the bone just to make sure she didn’t have to raise a finger.

He was able to find solace in calmer moments, and was always able to push through even if he was ticked off and overwhelmed after extensive work. Your help was also another thing that helped keep him more stable.

Every time you helped him calm down or showed him love, Gyutaro seemed to understand why Daki enjoyed him helping her so much.

No wonder Daki confided in his assistance if being tended to and pampered felt this good.

“M’ proud of you, Gyu.. always working so hard.. you’re such a sweet man, you know that?”

Your voice cooed, causing his stomach to do flips from the simple words of praise that acknowledged his hard work. The words ‘sweet man’ were definitely not fitting for him in any other circumstances or around anyone else, and he knew that he wasn’t sweet. But he could care less, always brushing off the rationality and letting himself comfortably melt into your sweet words of affirmation and love. As long as he was with you, he was more than fine being a sweet man. Anything that made you happy, anything you wanted to call him.. he would love all of it, just seeing you smile is enough to make his heart race. He never realized how emotionally sensitive he was until he met you, but.. he doesn’t really mind it.

At first Gyutaro was worried and even intimidated by how you made him feel. fuzzy, comforted, calm.. all were signs of weakness to him, which was something that he couldn’t be based on what was instinctually ingrained into his head. At least.. that was until he actually started working with you and becoming more comfortable with the idea of feeling comfortable. He still hated the idea of being weak.. but he didn’t mind being calm for a little bit, even if it meant showing some weakness. He felt this way because you would be there, someone he knew that he could show these ‘weaknesses’ around without being viewed as lesser.

He grumbled softly, pulling you closer just ever so slightly. Gyutaro made sure to be gentle, always aware of his weird boney physique and always worried of hurting you, or even just making you uncomfortable.

“You did good today, Gyutaro.. so good. I’m so lucky to have you, and so is Daki.. you make us the luckiest souls in the world..”

These words were ones that he would never forget; Akin to whenever else you praised him. He would just never get over it, and never fully get used to how good and relaxing it truly felt. Despite what you claimed about you and Daki being the luckiest souls alive because of him, he felt the opposite. Because despite his misfortune, he honestly and truly believed he had to be one of the luckiest men alive to have gotten to meet and form a relationship with you. He was the luckiest man alive to be able to provide and care for his sister and you, and it was a task that made him feel something nothing else could.

Lying peacefully in your arms listening to sweet words of affirmation, for once Gyutaro truly felt at peace in this hectic life he upholds.

#gyutaro needs hugs #he’s tired help him 😭 #he loves you #demon slayer #gyutaro #demonslayer #gyutaro demon slayer #kimestu no yaiba #kny #gyutaro shabana #gyutaro x reader #demon slayer x reader #i love gyutaro #I love him sooo #gyutaro my beloved #gyutaro fluff #gyutaro x you

[seapomelo]

At first, my girl didn't like what I had in store for her. She was a prude, sex was boring and only after she gave me explicit consent. I had to carefully shape her personality so that she would enjoy it. Doing the little things over time, so that her perception of things changed. Now I can take her anytime, anywhere, in any hole, and she sees nothing wrong with it. Here are some things I did so that she changed.

Explaining things to her that I knew she knew, so that she felt stupid. Gradually she stopped trying to understand, because if something is important, I will explain it to her in easy to understand words. Thanks to that, she became much dumber and agreeable - if I show her how the world works, how can she fight with me? And now the things I explain are how to properly suck cock, the best ways to make her cunt available and methods for her to condition herself even more for my enjoyment.

You have to normalize casual sexual interactions. Giving her a massage? Don't forget to also grope her ass during it! Cuddling? Feel free to touch her breasts. Watching a movie? From time to time touch her pussy. Are you both under a shower? Offer to wash her back, do it, but while doing it also touch her. This in itself doesn't do much, besides making sexual interactions normal, which is useful in other forms of training. After a while she'll say something like "I'm stupid", and you have to reward her for that, by giving some attention to her cunt.

Sometimes, when she made mistakes, I bullied her a little for them. She forgot to unpack the groceries? Tell her that she must be a bit dumb. Getting something wrong during cooking? Comment it appropriately. Figure out what treat she likes, and then buy it for yourself. Grope her while bullying her. That way she will learn to accept the degradation and get off of it. After a while, tell her that the best way for apologizing is offering herself sexually. She forgot to do the thing you asked for? Tell her she must accept the punishment and spank her.

Initially she was a prude woman who didn't wear short skirts or exposing tops and was adamant to not do anything sexual in public places. I groped her from time to time, normalizing this. Sometimes I would raise her skirt just enough so that she wouldn't be exposed, but she would notice. Ask her to feel out my hard cock while on a train. After a long period, she's open to doing more things in public. Last week I asked her to blow me at night in a park, and she happily obliged. A few days ago, I took her on a walk with a collar and a leash on. Now she sometimes offers to show her boobs without me asking while we're out.

Give her rewards. Nothing changes the chemistry of a cunt's brain as much as appreciation, treats and gifts. She was a nice hole for a few days? Buy her the dildo that you know she wants, or a maid outfit that fits her. Cook a meal she likes, and tell her she can eat it after she sucks your cock. After she offers herself anally of her own volition for the first time, take her on a nice date (of course after stuffing her holes with remote controlled toys you can activate just as she starts talking to the waiter!)

These are only a few ways of training your slut! What are yours? If you're a slut, how were you trained, or how you wish to be trained?

#bimbo training #bimboification #dumbification #dumbimbofication #degrading k1nk #praise and degredation #degredation kink #free use cnc #men are superior #mysoginy kink #worship kink #dom thoughts #gaslighting kink #corruption kink #fr33use #cnc free use #cnc k!nk #r@pe k!nk #r@pe k1nk #r@pe kink #r4p3 kink #bd/sm master #bd/sm daddy

[epithetemporium]

reguarding the trixie mario kart post,

do you have thoughts for the other characters? like mains/ skill level/ play style that kinda thing

love ur posts sm :3

(Naww thank you <33)

Molly

she WILL hit you with that green shell

especially right before the finish line

in fact all that stored up anger makes her incredibly good at sniping people with items

Molly knows about a few shortcuts but doesn't really use them because she's too worried about ruining her race by failing them

mains Toadette (and Isabelle but technically she isn't really a Mario Kart character but I'll ignore it since she's in the game)

her favorite track is Maple Treeway

Phoenica

She's too nice to use the items

actually she doesn't even really RACE at all, because it's irresponsible to drive a vehicle at these speeds

Feenie tries to apply real world driving laws to Mario Kart

it does not go well

there are no laws in Baby Park, only chaos

She loves the Princess drivers the most and adores the Babies

Uses smart steering

ALWAYS picks Daisy Circuit because of the statues of Luigi and Daisy together (she thinks they're very adorable)

Trixie

as said, she mains Drybones

Trixie knows ALL the important game breaking things. Shortcuts, best item spots, what would theoretically be the best combo, you name it

I think they'd prefer the bikes over the karts

favorite tracks are Coconut Mall (the Mario Kart fandom will understand why), Mushroom Gorge and Boo Lake

has to intentionally play bad so people don't stop playing with her at all

if anyone has a perfect rating in all cups at all speeds it's Trixie

Rick

he's terrible

I don't think he has fully figured out how a race works, even though he was told multiple times

this man right here plays as a Mii racer, you can't change my mind

he likes playing together with Phoenica. They don't race, they just drive around the courses and look at the pretty scenery together

if he ever gets any speed item in the item roulette he will cause chaos

probably drives backwards and against walls as we're speaking

Giovanni

the way he plays makes you think he's really bad at hiding that he lets you win

.....oh wait no, he's actually worse than thought-

he's oddly competitive even though his skills aren't the best but will intentionally play even worse when he knows someone is having a bad day

mostly uses King Boo, Waluigi and Birdo

favorite tracks include: Excitebike Arena, 3DS Neo Bowser City, Waluigi Pinball and Choco Mountain

he also has terrible luck in this game

loses most of his good items to shocks or gets hit over and over again

Sylvie

oh PLEASE he's way too adult for childish games like these

if you invite him over he'll spend the entire day infront of this game, experiencing inhuman joy whenever he gets a top spot, but he'll never admit it

Lorelai

I feel like if anyone were to cheat in Mario Kart it would be her

I'm not even sure how but she probably finds a way

actually this game would be terrible for her she will get so frustrated over this

she sometimes uses tracks like the Rainbow Roads, Rosalina's Ice World and Sky-High Sundae as inspirations for her Dream Bubbles

most likely likes Rosalina and Daisy the most

Zora

she will make your life a living hell here

sometimes she doesn't even drive she just...waits at the line with items....ready to ruin your entire game

she could totally win if she wanted to but she'd have fun in just targeting some player

#epithet erased #ee #molly blyndeff #phoenica fleecity #trixie roughhouse #trixie roughouse #rick shades #giovanni potage #sylvester ashling #sylvie ashling #lorelai blyndeff #zora salazar #ask #ursiidaexviii #mario kart #ramblings #headcanons

[i-guess-im-into-this-now]

The Apothecary Diaries

S1E14 First Watch

Here's where I watch The Apothecary Diaries for the first time and give my thoughts, analysis, predictions, and occasionally I stumble into a joke.

To start at the beginning:

Episode 1

Content warning: Discussion on sexual harassment, assault, and rape

My character/location cheat sheet

Suiren - Jinshi's attendant

Lady Gyokuyou - Precious consort

Hongniang - Lady Gyokuyou's attendant

Jade Pavilion - Lady Gyokuyou's pavilion

Concubine Lihua - Wise Consort

Concubine Loulan - the new Pure Consort

Lady Lishu - child bride concubine

Lakan - mysterious officer

Lihaku - young military officer

Pairin - one of the princesses of Verdigris House

Opening. Like with many of the openings in this show, I don't know what is happening yet. But it is visually and musically stunning. The strings bowing out some poignant melody while a woman under a red umbrella crosses a nearly colorless courtyard with her retinue. I'm guessing this must be the new concubine. Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure that was the crown that Lady Ah-Duo wore. This lady ditches it as soon as she comes into the Garnet Pavilion. I wonder how she feels about being made into the newest high ranking concubine. Her face is revealing nothing to me.

I don't know what Lady Gyokuyou is up to, but I love her, so I'm looking forward to whatever "good timing," she's trying to take advantage of. Probably trying to see Maomao I'm guessing.

Oh good, Maomao is planting her own herb garden. Perfect! Finally a way to start to make a place for herself in Jinshi's world. Maybe she can find a way to fit in here. Suiren doesn't care about this garden though, she wants Maomao to clean the office. And I'm starting to wonder if this lonely residence is maybe not as great for Maomao as the Jade Pavilion was. Back in the Jade Pavilion, Maomao was surrounded by people who cared about her and supported her. That isn't to say that Suiren won't, but who else even lives here? Gaoshun? I mean there is Jinshi of course, but I'd like to know she fits in with more than just him.

Turns out Jinshi is in the office that Maomao is meant to clean, so maybe Suiren is just trying to push Jinshi and Maomao together.

Something truly screwy has happened. Maomao has been selected to teach the new Pure Consort. What they want her to teach, I don't know. Probably not poisons. As it turns out, Lady Gyokuyou has written a recommendation for Maomao. A chance to get Maomao back into the Rear Palace so they can all see her maybe? Oh haha, Lady Lihua, wants her back too! Well Maomao did teach Lady Lihua something useful! Terrific! Maomao, who just failed her exam to be a court lady, is now highly recommended to teach the new high ranking concubine. Incredible.

Before Maomao had walked in, Jinshi called the situation "perplexing," followed by a frustrated or maybe thoughtful hum. Then when Maomao arrived Jinshi definitely made a frustrated sound. Was he upset that he would most likely need to send her out of his residence, and back to the Rear Palace? Was he upset that this seems like a blatant excuse for those concubines to see her? Or maybe he's upset that she failed her exam to be a court lady, because she does show up ready to clean his office, carrying all of her cleaning equipment.

Jinshi: The Rear Palace has set it's mind to the Concubine's education. And they selected you to be the teacher. Maomao: That's a good one.

Maomao, doesn't see how she could be good enough for a position like this. It must be a joke.

Jinshi: I'm not joking here.

And, oh yeah, he's not happy. He doesn't like that two of the top concubines have forced his hand like this. And maybe he also doesn't like Maomao's self deprecating attitude He sends her off so abruptly, that it seems curt. And what the hell is Jinshi's issue? Why is he acting like this with Maomao? Maybe he is just uncertain what to do with her. She's so capable at certain things, and yet... there are certain things she just won't or can't do. She's a highly requested teacher to the top concubines in the rear palace, yet she can't pass the test to become a court lady. Maybe that is what has Jinshi so annoyed. Maybe he can get over himself, while Maomao goes on her mission.

Does Maomao still owe money to Verdigris House? WTF. Maomao tries to stealthily change her wages but Suiren immediately shuts that down, even though Jinshi was willing to pay her more.

Jinshi seems excited about Maomao's class now and wants to see what teaching supplies she is bringing to the Rear Palace and Maomao becomes defensive.

Maomao: Under no circumstances can he see these!

What does she have in there? Maybe it's some courtesan stuff. Perhaps she's going to try to teach the new consort some brothel tricks?

Maomao insists on pulling her own cart. Maybe she didn't realize that Jinshi and Gaoshun would also be coming to the Rear Palace or she wants to be sure no one gets a chance to look at the racy goods she's transporting.

Jinshi is received like a celebrity, with lines of adoring fans all hoping to catch a glimpse and make a comment about his appearance. He puts on a smile and laughs, but I think he hates this. Maybe Maomao should draw some freckles on him.

And maybe this is a good time to take a closer look at what Jinshi's experiences have been with sexual harassment. I have @cjrae and @teaflowsthroughthesesims to thank for opening my eyes to some things in the comments section of the last blog.

Jinshi has been getting this kind of reaction to his appearance for a long time. I'm realizing now why he was so excited to have Maomao glare at him in one of the early episodes. People so often look at him and see his beauty, but not the person. He has never had to worry about that with Maomao. Her absolute lack of self value means she never considered for a moment that Jinshi would see her as a viable romantic partner, and so therefor never bothered to look at him with a lustful eye. It's rather sad that that was a novel experience for Jinshi.

We know that his own female servants have tried to leave their underwear in his closet. I've learned that the undergarment made of human hair is meant to be a love spell. How utterly fucked up. Just as bad is the fact that people have tried to sneak aphrodisiacs into his food before. Maomao identified one for him way back in episode 2. I did not realize that when he asked Maomao to make an aphrodisiac that he would be using that to retaliate against the male officer that gave him the drugged food, and it becomes apparent that he did when we hear the rumor about a man who "hates women" that was seduced by servant girl. I've been taught that "hates women" is a euphemism for gay men. So Jinshi has been experiencing sexual harassment from both men and women, and it ranges from lascivious comments that he hears on the street like we see in this scene, to very intimate acts like the undergarment in his own drawer and food that was given to him. It's one of the reasons Gaoshun attends him everywhere. Perhaps Maomao should be a food taster for Jinshi.

I can't help but think about the moment when Jinshi gave Maomao his hair pin. She had just explained her story of being captured and sold, but also about how she had been sexually harassed. He probably felt a powerful empathy with her then. Imagine what it would mean for him to share his own experiences with her.

Jinshi wants to attend Maomao's sex ed class, but she literally pushes him out the door. Delightful. She says they are going to be discussing sensitive womanly issues, so, cool, maybe Maomao is the right choice for this class. She might actually teach these ladies something. Maybe prevent a few UTIs and yeast infections.

Lady Gyokuyou is so happy that her favorite romcom Maomao is back. Maomao knows everyone in the room, other than the new concubine, Lady Loulan and her attendant.

Maomao shares a book that gets blushes all around the room, as well as a few more dramatic reactions, so it's got to be something she learned at the brothel. The new lady seems to be ignoring Maomao?

Jinshi has his ear pressed to the door, like a creep. Is he worried about what Maomao will teach these ladies, or just curious about what she knows? Maomao bust him trying to listen in. When he finally sees what's going on in the room, he's not so sure he should have agreed to all of this. Lady Gyokuyou and Lady Lihua seem pleased, but Lady Lishu is traumatized, and most of the attendants are freaking out. Only Lady Loulan seems unfazed. What is her deal any way. All I've seen her do so far is discard her crown in the opening scene, yawn, gaze off at nothing, discard the book Maomao gave her, and ignore everything around her. Is she bored? Depressed? Does she have a disability? Maybe she isn't ignoring everyone, maybe she literally can't hear them? Of maybe she can't understand the language? It would explain why she's not moved by anything being said and why the book is of no interest to her. Maomao did point out that her clothes are of a foreign style. I can't figure her out. Maomao says that Lady Loulan is unreadable. Agreed.

Maomao actually seems pretty pleased as she lays down to sleep. She's giggling about her bonus, and I have to appreciate her commitment to avarice.

The hell? Was that an explosion? Maomao thinks to investigate, but then gives up at the thought of Suiren. How much impact does Suiren have on Maomao's behavior? Is Maomao afraid she'll get in trouble with Suiren? Is this a good influence that is keeping Maomao from behaving recklessly, or is it a bad influence that stymies her curiosity and impulse to help others?

We get a name to the mysterious man from last episode, Master Lakan. He's investigating the explosion and has found that opium pipe from last episode. His face says he knows something, but when someone asks if he found something, he says no. Is he involved with this explosion somehow? Is he going to cover up some piece of evidence? Is he an investigator in the palace? If so than he probably will cross paths with Maomao at some point, since she can't help but get involved in mysteries.

Maomao is working in Jinshi's office today. She's surprised to see how much work falls to a eunuch of the Rear Palace. And for fuck's sake Maomao, the man is so clearly not just a Rear Palace eunuch. I think she must be intentionally delusional about this. She's already figured out part of the puzzle that is Jinshi's background but chose to discard it. Perhaps the truth is too intimidating for Maomao to face.

Because if she were to accept who and what Jinshi is, that would probably be the end of all of this. It would widen the gulf between them as Jinshi was worried about a few episodes ago. It's something Maomao is also very worried about. She's being very careful that she doesn't do anything that will force them to part.

Jinshi is so obvious with his attraction to Maomao, and Maomao is so reserved, that it can often seem like this is a one sided relationship. Maomao doesn't dare think about her feelings for Jinshi, much less speak or act on them. To get an idea of what she's feeling, we have to make some assumptions. But they aren't totally unfounded, we can see evidence of Maomao's feelings in some of the choices she makes, and in some of the actions she takes, even if we may be waiting a real long time for her to think about or verbalize them.

Maomao has managed to secure herself a position here in Jinshi's residence, in a position that keeps her close to him. She chose to come back to the palace. She gave up the people she calls family in the Pleasure District, and the career she loves as an apothecary to return to the palace. And yes, she thought she was going to be working in the Rear Palace, but she's not complaining about being in Jinshi's residence instead. In fact she's planting her herbs in the yard. She's literally and metaphorically putting down roots here.

Though Maomao thinks she's not worth the affections of a eunuch official, she has still managed to build a rapport with Jinshi. They can banter, and solve mysteries together hold each other when they're drunk and sad. She likes that he encourages her to use her skills, that he appreciates her abilities, that he pushes her out of the places she hides, so that she can grow. And for Maomao that's pretty nice actually. All of it is more than she would hope for from him. It's a beautiful dream, that falls apart if Jinshi is more than a simple palace official. Because even as a simple official, she's taking more than she deserves. It's completely inappropriate already. If he's a prince... there really, really isn't a place for her in that world. So she holds on where she can for now, and takes what is offered, and very carefully does not think about Jinshi's true identity.

Also, because Jinshi is a "eunuch" he is safe for Maomao. She has some serious fears around sex. When she told us about being sexually harassed she said that nothing ever came of it, and I do think that being attacked, even if she was not raped is enough to cause this level of trauma. There could be more though. She told that story to a pavilion full of people, it's highly likely that if there were a more serious story about sexual assault that she may not have told it so publicly. Regardless of the origins, Maomao has sexual trauma. As a "eunuch," Jinshi would not be able to assault her that way, even if she thought he were willing to. So, it's easier for Maomao to continue to believe an increasingly unbelievable delusion, than to deal with her trauma.

I am so here for the Gaoshun-Maomao dynamic. Gaoshun is mothering "Xiaomao" and making sure she stays warm, because it's cold outside after all. Maomao is once again thinking about what a catch Gaoshun is. You know, if things don't work out with Jinshi, then Gaoshun could be a nice runner up.

Oh and Jinshi has noticed all of that! He's literally growling. Back the hell up off his girl Gaoshun! Oh my god this is a hilarious scene. Now Gaoshun is claiming the cloak and thoughtfulness came from Jinshi. I wonder if next time, Jinshi doesn't get up and bring her a cloak himself, rather than sending Gaoshun.

Maomao: To need permission to give warm clothes to a chilly servant. Talk about bureaucracy.

Holy hell, her ability to misread a situation... is just... mindboggling. I know her confidence is nil, she is incapable of seeing Jinshi's affection for her, but the mental gymnastics required to come up with other possible explanations is a lot.

Once again, medicinal herbs have drawn Maomao to the military officers side of the palace grounds. She happened to run into Lihaku. Jinshi is not going to like that.

Lihaku fell in love during his night at Verdigris House, and now he has dedicated himself to his career advancement so he can buy another night with Pairin. But in the meantime he drinks frugally with other girls hoping to catch a glimpse of his love.

Maomao says she's been transferred to a palace official's personal quarters.

Lihaku: Transferred huh? And to such a thankless detail. Maomao: Yup, I've gathered that much.

Something didn't seem right here, so I switched from the English dub to the Japanese with English subtitles and got:

Lihaku: Personal quarters? Who's crazy enough to do that? Maomao: Yeah, I wonder the same.

This is really not an important scene, so I'm not sure why I'm so hung up on it, but I think something is probably lost in translation. I think what Lihaku is implying is that the move is a bad one for Maomao. It's not as prestigious as working for a high ranking concubine in the Rear Palace. In a private residence how will a servant stand out or advance? Lihaku is all about climbing the ranks, and he pities Maomao for getting stuck in a position where she can't. Maomao has gathered that this position isn't one to bring her career advancement, but she doesn't cares about that, it's not why she wanted to return to the palace or why she is finding contentment in her new job. So she pokes fun at herself yeah I guess I am crazy for taking this position, not because she's missing out on a chance to advance her career, but because she's given up on other options for her life like being an apothecary in the Pleasure District, to take a risk in the palace.

There was a fire last night, the origins of which are unknown. Maomao cannot resist a mystery. Maomao surmises that it was an explosion and that the military suspects arson. Maomao finds that same opium pipe that Lakan did. She has an idea, and now she just needs to prove it. She asks Lihaku to bring her a few things. Maomao builds a very nice wooden box, and Lihaku compliments her. She remembers a time when she was young, at home with Luomen while he examines a box. Maomao uses her box to demonstrate how improperly stored powder such as flour can be combustible. She surmises that someone went into the warehouse to light a pipe and accidentally caused the explosion.

Damn I like watching her work.

Lihaku: How is it you know these kind of things. Maomao: Simple. I once blew up a room at the Verdigris House experimenting with powders. Lihaku: You're a menace.

I don't know if Lihaku is taking personal offense to her causing trouble at the brothel where the love of his life lives, or if he just thinks she's weird and dangerous. Either way, I don't think Jinshi has anything to worry about when it comes to Maomao and Lihaku. I'm looking forward to him be jealous about this anyway.

Maybe I do understand how she can still owe the Verdigris House, if she has destroyed rooms in the building before...

Maomao kept the fancy pipe, accidentally of course, we've all forgotten about her klepto-urges a couple episodes ago, right? I can't help but think that keeping this pipe is a mistake. There is a lot that could go wrong if someone finds that in her things. She could be accused of using opium to start, but she could also be accused of stealing it, selling drugs, associating with nefarious people, or who knows what else. I don't like that she has it. She considers returning it. I hope she does.

The final scene is of a man having a break down in an eatery. He breaks something and cries about being "worthy too." I don't know who he is, but the other dude who looks back over his shoulder looks familiar. Was he around when Sir Kuonen died? Do we have a serial killer in the palace? Or maybe an assassin?

Want to start from the beginning: Episode 1

Next Episode:

Episode 15

#the apothecary diaries #apothecary diaries #maomao #jinshi #jinmao

[artemisandhersilverbow]

Ok, if you don't want to engage in some (queer) tin foiling... scroll away.

So first off, I think this song rules. It was one of the few that I let just vibe instead of doing what my brain usually does, which is scrutinize lyrics/marvel over the layers of meaning. It feels like it has Kill Bill energy and that was good enough for me.

My Albatross variation of the TTPD vinyl showed up yesterday — TTPD is perhaps the best her team has done btw — and was pouring over the lyrics last night and paused on I Can Fix Him (No, Really I Can) in particular.

The last line has been one that most people have chuckled at. Like she spent a whole song building up this menacing conceit: "this boy is bad news, but he can't hold a candle to me — I'll handle him." Only to be like, lol jk at the end.

But seeing that last line written out this way scratched at my brain... she really doesn't scream that line at all. Why is it in all caps? And while we're at it... I mean it's an accepted spelling, but technically the incorrect spelling of 'whoa.' It kind of felt, by putting it in caps, like she was calling attention to it. Was it an acronym? Not that I could tell.

But... just to double check... how had she spelled woah/whoa prior? The only song I could think of off the top of my head to check was Better Than Revenge. When reading her lyrics you really wont find 99% of the "whoas" in her discography written because they're more like instrumentals.

And that right there is a "whoa." Of course my eyes twitched at the matching colors of the two vids, but I'll get to that. And then I was only able to find one more written "whoa."

Ok, cool.

But back to Better Than Revenge... It struck me that something had been "fixed" about the song. The famous "she's better known for things that she's done on the mattress" line had been swapped out in the rerecording for "he was a moth to the flame she was holding the matches."

So I looked back at I Can Fix Him... could this be a joke/hint about "fixing" him. Like fixing the pronouns? "WOAH" is an intentional misspelling just by comparing it to her own body of work. But it would be rather clever if the "he" she's referring to (at least on this one layer of the song) was her use of that pronoun in her work. It would make the lines "I can fix him / No, really, I can / And only I can" make even more sense, imo. She's the author of this music and she's rerecording it/making it.

What's more is that the collaged flower in the lyric booklet and the aesthetic of the lyric video are giving me um... big Reputation vibes?

Hey kids, spelling is FUN! Am I absolutely living in delulu thinking that Reputation could also be "fixed" re: pronouns? Oh, I don't doubt it. But I needed to get this out of my brain, out into the world, and let the chips fall as they may and always do.

And at least Taylor Nation is also in on the joke...

#i can fix him (no really i can) #gaylor #the tortured poets department the anthology #TTPD #reputation tv #pronouns #hey kids spelling is fun! #WOAH! #*WHOA

[moon-upright]

Rare Smiles - Julian Devorak

(the one in which Esme gushes talks about her lover's smile...)

(esme is something of a writer so why doesn't SHE answer this prompt, huh? why should i do it)

♡

Julian's Smile: A Thought by Esme Noble

Julian's smile isn't rare, if by “rare” you mean “infrequent.” On the contrary, he smiles all the time, and for a variety of reasons, I find.

He smiles sometimes when he's nervous, sometimes when he's sad, or to make people comfortable, or to keep a secret (his version of a poker face is a relaxed smile as opposed to stoicism)… Just off of the top of my head. That doesn't even mention how he smiles when he's happy, and how even within that one emotion he's got different shapes of smiles — his raffish grin, a teasing smirk, a small smile of awe, a smile of endearment, a beam of pure joy.

It's like a reflex to him; if you catch him unawares, he's likely to smile in surprise at whatever you did or said. (Especially if he's falling asleep. If he's barely awake and you speak to him, half the time the corners of his lips curl up and his eyebrows raise before he's even processed what you said. It's the funniest thing. The cutest.)

His smile is rare in the sense that something about it is so unique to him. It's Julian's Smile. That's why it looked so odd to see him grin while in disguise as Asra. It just didn't fit who Asra is.

It's everything that Julian is. It's sharp, it's dramatic, it's flirtatious.

If you went into a bar and asked around about him (“What's the first thing you think of when you hear Julian Devorak? ”), you would hear a variety of answers, from “You mean the tall one?” or “The one with the hair?” to a heartily laughed/sneered “That bastard!” And certainly included in this list is “The one with the smile?” Or some variation of it. I mean it, I've heard it myself. He is the one with the smile so bright that it burns itself into your mind.

I suppose even I am not immune to a pretty smile — when we first met (the actual first time, before the Plague), it was what I initially noticed about him. Some people have that ability to smile naturally in such a way where all you want is to see them smile again. I imagine that I'm not alone in this feeling either, where Julian Devorak bursts into your life, all grins, and it makes your heart soar into some Ether realm full of fire and light and color. To smile like that, and change someone's life forever, to change me from someone who was not particularly inclined toward anything, and tilt my world on its axis, is magic.

Though I figure it wasn't only the smile that did all of that. It would be meaningless if not for the person behind it. Julian Devorak and his magic.

#art writes #finally #should i put this on ao3 for the hell #vesuvia weekly #julian devorak #apprentice esme #the arcana #the arcana fanfic #the arcana fan apprentice