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#i wouldnt consider myself that for two reasons
The line between binary and nonbinary trans people is nowhere near as clean as some of yall think it is
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end-orfino · 15 days
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droners might have some flaws but i really think that if someone wants to write a proper rivals to lovers dynamic then they should study whatever hannah and corto have as a reference
#like just. i have heard a bunch of people complain about enemies to lovers dynamics sometimes accidentally turning out to just be toxic#because of the writers not nailing down the jackpot of the hostility from both parties being balanced#and also other reasons. and i myself have my own too. bcs its just not an easy dynamic to write#but genuiely so far? so far these two have none of these issues#their relationship goes from hating each other to considering each other a more respected rival to genuine friends in a great way that-#-doesnt feel rushed or unnatural#and they're unified by having far more similarities than you'd think they'd have at first glance. which was both why they hated each other#and why they work so great now that they're friends#AND their haterism towards each other back when they werent friends was very balanced and equal. they both hated each others guts lmao#and now that they're friends they still bicker but it was said directly that now its just how they act when racing is involved & theyre-#competing against each other. like that one 'best friends off court sworn enemies on it. athletes understand' meme#and outside of it they're genuiely friends and like each other#and EVEN DURING RACING. HAVE YOU SEEN THE MECHANIX RACE#their bickering during the race is pure fun for them they're LAUGHING TOGETHER it's so great#PLUS THE SHOW WENT OUT OF ITS WAY MORE THAN ONCE TO SHOW HOW WELL THEY CAN SYNCHRONIZE.#HOW WELL THEY CAN WORK TOGETHER.#i could say more. i could say more about them. but just know that the droners yuri is real#for the record though they're not. canon. i dont want to queerbait anyone on accident.#but i havent seen a single fan that wouldnt agree that they have something going on there#which even with a fandom this small is saying something
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badgyalshii · 16 days
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WANNA TRY IT WITH ME?
word count: 3.1k?
warnings! smut, maybe some typos, oral (f) and missionary, overstimulation, some dirty talk.
pairing! only fans!timothee chalamet x (f) friend!reader (ALWAYS SAFE FOR POC + PLUS SIZE)
a/n: hereee goes my long awaited apology for the finale of its never over🙄 i hope you guys enjoy! two hands on the phone please😏 the “xxx” is a divider btw i just got lazy lmao TELL ME IF IT SERVES CUNTTTT (requests are open)
have you read the series? check it out!
like shii’s writing!? check out her masterlist for her future imagines/series! (that needs to be updated, come on shii wtf r u doing😒)
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It was no secret that timothee owned a onlyfans, he didnt really talk about it though. He didnt want it to be the main conversation between him and his friends, he kept the subjects separated but he was very close with his fans. You said you would always support what he does and even registered for an account to follow him, he tried to fight it and block you from his page, but you said it wasnt really that big of a deal considering you would never open the app and just to let you love him, to which he sighed and let it go, but convsersations were awkward because in the back of his mind he didnt know and was wondering you ever watched his videos. It was only a side gig, but he wanted to focus on college and small acting.
One day, you decided to initiate the conversation with timmy while you both ate chinese. ¨i just felt like if i talked to you about it then it would be hard for you to separate me from being a normal sensitive person from being ya know….that¨ he explained, you shrugged. ¨i mean, i wouldnt look at you differently- not that ive watched but i know you, and how could i judge such a sweet person like you? The only thing that i would have questions about is, like, is it awkward? On camera? Im not even comfortable with myself so put myself on camera and do that-¨ ¨if you dont like yourself, trust their is someone to appreciates you like ten times more than you do on a good day. Theres no reason for you to feel like that¨ he said looking over before eating the rice with a fork. You let out a hum and things fell silent as you both watched a movie, but it was clear you both were thinking. ¨would- would you like…¨ he looked over at you, your eyebrows lifted as you looked at him, he seemed nervous as his cheeks were slowly turning rosy, he cleared his throat before finishing his question. ¨like try it?¨ he asked, ¨erm¨ you said before thinking to yourself, ¨maybe with someone i trust, could be fun¨ you smiled before asking for the rice, taking a forkfull bite off of the same utensil that timmy used. He shrugged, becoming more comfortable, seeing as you were rather chill about the situation, it was a joke to him, what he was about to say, but the tone that came out otherwise said different.
¨wanna try it with me?¨ your eyes widened in surprise, to which he laughed, ¨joking, im joking¨ he let out with a nervous chuckle leaving his lips, his face was visibly warm now, a big grin on his face trying to fight off the fact that he said that. You chewed and swallowed your rice carefully, not saying a word and looking at him while he looked at you, itching and waiting for your response. You shrugged, ¨fuck it¨ your stomach was doing flips, what were you saying? Are you fucking serious? You thought after you said that, your eyebrows high and a side smile on your lips. His mouth parted, ¨when-when would you wanna do it?¨ he asked, ¨its your page, shouldnt you make the rules?¨ you muttered, setting down the rice. ¨tommorow maybe?¨ he let out, watching you get up, you said yeah and said you had to use the bathroom.
When you made it to the bathroom you looked at yourself in the mirror before letting out a sigh and putting a hand on your face is disbelief, what had you singed yourself up for? Why were you just talking? Were you just talking? It was clear that you both were very attractive, so imagine what people think. Your shared friends already think you guys have something casual going on, so would they really be surprised if you both busted out with a cake saying ¨we did it! We fucked! (and recorded)¨? You bit your lip before running the water and washing your hands, before exiting out of the bathroom and sitting next to timothee again.
XXX
You both shyd away about the idea even if it was just the next day, but here we are. You sat ontop of timothees bed, fully clothed and your hair out of the way. You bit your lip, you were anxious, you didnt know how to feel about this, how would others take it? What if they didnt like you? What if you didnt like it. Timothee sat infront of you the entire time, telling you that it was okay if you didnt want to do it and reassuring you the entire time and double checking in with you. As nervous as you were, there was a small burst of excitement that jumped in your stomach.
He bit his lip, ¨you ready?¨ he asked, holding up the camera, about to record you. On the nightstand sat a white viberator, body oil, and lube just incase. He raised three fingers behind the camera, initiating a count down, he very soon pressed the record button, you saw the red small light from the camera flicker. A smile played on your lips from awkwardness but you tried your best to cover it up. ¨this is y/n. One of my closest friends who wanted to join us today¨ he chuckled, ëyes on the screen as he looked through the camera to see you. ¨but ill let her introduce herself¨ he finished, your eyes widened, you didnt know what to do. ¨im nervous¨ you let out with a pity smile and you both let out a laugh, ¨just get undressed while you introduce yourself¨ he let out a small grunt as he watched you immediately catch on and start pulling up your top.he bit his lip, he couldnt deny you looked fucking great, the way your breasts were laid pretty in that bra and how your hips sat with the hidden treasures just waiting to be touched. You watched as he slowly palmed himself and continued to record. You decided this was the right time to speak up.
¨my name is y/n, but timothee told you that¨ you laughed as you stripped your shirt off, muffled music played in the back but you both werent too focused on that, you wore a matching set for the circumstance, and when your bra was revealed he let out a muttered fuck and applied more pressure to his clothed cock. T̈his is my first time¨ you continued, looking over at the oil before reaching over, your ass in the air as you reached for it he let out a sigh, and watched as your back arched and when you came back at sat correctly, he lended his hand out, ¨i wanna do that¨ he said, and you complied, handing him the oil, he let out a small groan, he was as hard as a rock and youve barely even started, he had no shirt on but he had his grey sweatpants, he took the camera and set it up on its stand on the end of the bed.
When he looked back at you, you sat there innocently, you sat on the back of your calves, legs closed and looking up at him so lost, it turned him on that he could take control and lead you. He softly grabbed your neck and pulled you in for a slowly soft to passionate open mouth kiss, pulling your head towards himself before letting you go and moving behind you, his warm touch on your arms, following all the way up to your neck and you tilted your head back on his shoulder as he now kissed your neck and uncuffed your bra. ¨shittttt¨ he muttered, looking at your tits and taking them into his hands, to which they fit perfectly, your nipple between his first and middle finger, rolling them around as soft sighs of pleasure left your lips, he looked at you the entire time before applying a kiss to your cheek, then your lips. You closed your eyes and let him lead you, you felt like you were falling in his arms and allowed him to take you anywhere, you swore this is what you needed, you almost forgot the camera was even there. He put his hand on your waist before he reached for the oil and while he did that, you stripped yourself from your shorts, revealing your matching thong before getting back into pisition and you looked at the camera, thinking you should be more seductive, you looked at it and let out a moan as the warm oil hit your body, he rubbed it over your chest, your stomach, his touch was gentle the entire time, ¨can you bend over infront of the camera for me?¨ he asked gently, you looked at him and nodded, your ass was pointed to the camera and he moved behind you and to the side, his eyebrows raised as you arched as your already glistening cunt was soaking the thin material of the thong, he applied oil over your ass and rubbed it in before his hands crawled up to the sides of your thong, ¨is it okay if i pull this down?¨ he asked, you nodded and he looked at you before dropping your panties, he let out a sigh of satifacation and rubbed over your entrance, you let out a hum and arched your back further before he plunged a finger into your soaking wet cunt, your mouth dropped as he slowly fingered you, he watched as your walls tighten around his fingers, his mouth dropped and he couldnt wait to put his dick inside.
He lifted up your ass as he started to apply pressure and finger harder, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked back at him. ¨like that?¨ he asked as he continued to finger, you bit your lip and nodded your head, your hips moved back into his hand as a small smirk played on his face before he stripped his fingers away, you let out a whine, wanting him to keep going before he surprised you and applied his tongue to your clit, your mouth dropped, his tongue was circling and you let out a moan.
¨timmy” left your lips, fuck. Is this what you were missing out on? Your stomach has butterflies as you leaned back wanting more, he let out a chuckle against your lips in cockiness seeing as you were enjoying this. He shook his head against your pussy and you moaned his name again. ¨dont stop, make me cum timmy¨ he let out another hum against your pearl before pulling away with a pop. ¨make you cum? Want me to make you cum baby?¨ he asked, pumping his fingers.
You looked back at him and seen your juices covering his lips, you could finish just now, looking at his low eyes, looking at him made it seem like he was clouded with ecstasy. He licked his lips and you nodded, letting out a soft please. He kissed your ass before getting on his knees and pulsing into your pussy harder, your eyebrows furrow as you close your eyes, opened mouth gasps and a deep moan just rips away from your lips, fuck, you couldnt take it. And the way timothee looked at you didnt help, ¨shit¨ he muttered, taking his thumb and rubbing your pearl in complete circles. Your mouth hung low as your belly started to heat up, you could feel yourself about to explode. You let out a whine and he bit his lower lip, ¨look at me, look at me while i make you cum¨ he circled faster, you looked at him desperate, desperate to finish.
And suddenly you did, ¨timmy!¨ you let out, your eyes rolling and the way he tried to ride your high out was overstimulating for you so you jerked your body from his fingers, to which he laughed at. ¨shut up¨ you laughed, putting your heand in your hands as your stomach continued to burn from the release. ¨you okay?¨ he asked again, you nodded yes and it was okay and that you were ready for the next round, he smiled at you, and you smiled back, before something else caught your attention. He was clearly breathing heavier and as you shamelessly panned his body, and something else was clearly looking at you.
He didnt try to hide it, instead, he grabbed it while he looked at you, ¨missionary? Or?¨ he asked. You shrugged in return, you liked that he mentioned missionary first, “is that a good angle?” you asked, “any shot with you in it is a good angle, y/n” he said, stripping from his sweats and boxers before coming over to press a kiss on your lips. Once again, the kiss became heated, he leaded you to lay on your back while your lips were still together. He came down and laid firm on you, pressing up against your bare pussy. You held onto his curls as his soft lips were on yours, his tongue entered your mouth, shamelessly clashing against yours, your teeth. It was so hot, he pumped himself before pressing up against your entrance. He rubbed his dick messily against your clit, looking at you jutter under his touch, he kissed your head before he entered slowly, a soft sigh left your lips as you made eye contact with him, watching his eyebrows press together from the easy slip in, to the tight satisfying feeling of your pussy wrapped around his hard throbbing dick. He looked at you for approval, and you nodded.
“y/n, fuck you feel good” he muttered, his mouth opening as you opened your legs further, wanting more. A throaty moan left your mouth as you leaned up on your elbows to watch him fuck you, his dick hit your spot everytime and he only moved faster. “Timmy, keep going” you moaned, your head tilting back from the euphoria. He reached up and grabbed your tit, massaging it as he continued to let out moans, “fuck, like that? You like that?” he muttered, now focusing and putting his hands on both sides of your head. He rocked his hips thorough, his mouth agape and low groans ripping away as the headboard of the bed clashed against the wall time and time again.
“yes! mmph-“ you were cut off by how deep his dick was inside you and how your sensitive nipples tickled in his touch, the way he looked so focused and lost in the moment only made you more wet, you tilted your head back and let out a cry, he was hitting the same spot over again and fucking you harder, you felt your walls clench desperately and that only motivated him more. “timmy!” you whine, putting your hand on his stomach and closing your legs around him, the sound of skin on skin became more relevant as he didnt stop, “i got you” he let out in a breathy, low and seductive tone.
he slapped your hand out of the way before taking it and your other and placing them ontop of the pillow, holding your hands by the wrist as he came down and kissed your sweet spot, “oh my- mmm!” a high pitched hum broke and tried to hide your neck, this was all so overpowering and it felt so good, “where do you want me to cum, y/n” he whispered in your ear, “fuck!” he closed his eyes and his hips rutted slowly, still having powerful strokes, “inside” you let out, he looks up at you before letting out a laugh, “are you crazy? you’re gonna get pregnant- shit” the pleasure took over, canceling his sentence.
“i wont” you shook your head, fuck thats all you wanted, for him to fill you up, give himself to you fully. he looks at you and presses a kiss to your lips before letting out an okay, he takes one of his hands off of your wrists to come down and rub your clit, but it was difficult considering how wet you were. your body was overstimulated and tried to fight his hand off by moving your hips, but when you moved them it just made him go deeper, past your spot, you froze in that position, your body shocked as he hit a point you didnt know anyone could. “fuck! dont stop!” you scream in a whiney tone, keeping your hips where they were. “cum for me” he said, his jaw clenching as he looked at you with all seriousness, “take it, take it from me make me cum!” you cry, his hand moved faster against your clit and more rough groans left his lips, your mouth suddenly became agape and he looked at you, your eyes pouring into his as you came. “timmy, im, im cumming” your eyebrows furrowed, it felt like the world stopped, your body jerked and released all the knots in your stomach. he came down and you both shared and open mouthed sloppy kiss, he bit his lip and and looked down at you, fucked you harder and the bed creaking and the camera was so close to flipping over.
“mmm” his lips pursed together, fucking you faster now, “timmy!” you cried again, before his mouth dropped, a whiney moan left him lips “y/n, y/n, aw, fuckkk y/n” he said over and over again, feeling his seed shoot up in your stomach as he looked at you, both eyes were desperate for each other, so hazed in the stars. he let you go and your arms went under his, holding him as he let out “uhs” as he finished cumming inside you, and making sure you got all of it as he messily rutted his hips until failure. your back came off the matress as you accepted the cum shooting up your pussy as your chest uncontrollably heaves.
his head falls into the deep of your neck, still breathing heavy but applied kisses there. Once he catches his breath, he sits back up and pulls out, a curse leaving your lips as he grabbed the camera and pointed it at you, you looked at him behind the camera, he was still breathing heavy and he reached his hand to your lips, his thumb brushing over them before you took it into your mouth and sucked, a smirk and a small chuckle left his lips before he took out his thumb and traced it along your body, you were covered in sweat, your body glistening heavenly, or at least he thought so. the camera following, all the way down until he zoomed in on your fucked out area, seeinng the cum slowly leaking from your hole and your clit visibly swollen. he separates your folds from each other, “man i could really eat you out again” he joked.
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whoisthatgirl13 · 3 months
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would i considered myself more gwynriel than elriel? yes.
HOWEVER
i wouldn’t be too upset if elriel is end game. i just dont want gwyn’s character to get hurt in the process and vice versa. i dont want SJM to see all the drama between the two ships and decide she has to make either one of them out to be the villain.
i don’t agree with the point that a lot of elriel’s are making in that SJM didn’t write in the gwynriel bonus part as a potential relationship scene. SJM knows that everyone is going to be picking apart every single line she writes and there were a lot of hints at them being mates.
BUT, with all this information in the press from HOFAS, i could see both elain and azriel rejecting their mates and ending up together.
if elriel was going to happen, i would like gwyn x azriel to be mates, gwyn and azriel helping each other on their healing journey, both of them rejecting the bond but remaining friends because even if they aren’t romantically attracted to each other, they are connected to help each other with their internal struggles
and if gwynriel were to happen, it is very important to me that elain has some kind of positive character development. a lot of gwynriel things have been written to where elain has to be dark an/or evil but i don’t think that should happen at all. honestly i think one of the reasons i am more gwynriel than elriel is there is almost no character development for her (there is some but its not as emphasized or as significant as say Nesta’s). i think elain has more to her than what SJM has written and I think she could be an awesome character, we just have nothing to go off of for her development besides her being a seer and killing the king of hybern for Nesta.
anyone let me know if they agree… i just feel like SJM hasn’t set up an interesting enough storyline for elriel but maybe im missing something besides the whole “the cauldron got it wrong” because even with that, im not seeing how azriel and elain are suited. but please let me know what yall are seeing because i wouldnt be upset, just with the information now, i wouldnt find elain x azriel as interesting
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youredreamingofroo · 2 months
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Goodbye? I don't think so. I hope not. A very, very long rant about storage (🙄), simblr and whatever the fuck else I go on about for a few paragraphs. Skip to the end at the gold text for a more.... "definitive" answer. Especially if you want to skip the nitty gritty and sappy wappy.
i dont know what to do anymore, I freed up 18 GBs of space it all managed to go down the drain in literally an hour, Im moving my blender things to my external HDD, because that alone is 20 GBs (because of Scene sizes), I just hate to free up the space because I dont want it to go right back down. This all sucks cuz I really really enjoy being on Simblr, but sims 4 just continues to be a nuisance, whether its actual problems or its storage problems, it just always finds a way, every year, to get me to suddenly decide that im retiring until my next bout of Sims 4 hyperfixation. I love all of you guys and I love seeing how you all enjoy my work, and what I do, and I love seeing your stuff, you all make such amazing creations, granted if I stopped playing TS4, it wouldnt mean I have to stop interacting on simblr, it just wouldnt be the same. A pattern I notice anytime I start a social media platform, is that something always finds its way into completely demotivating me from posting, whether it's just literal lack of motivation, depression, realizing a project is too vast for me, storage problems, it's always something and it's always when I finally get comfortable or happy on a platform, especially after making friends, not that im saying my friends are one of the reasons I leave, thats far from it. I REALLY dont wanna take a break from Sims 4, I really really genuinely wanna start posting my story (W.A.S), but I'm not like a Sims 4 youtuber, I can't remain dedicated to one game, I play other games, I wanna play the Witcher games (or at least try to play them, I kinda suck rn), I wanna finish Detroit become human, I want to 100% Beyond two souls (and DBH), I wanna finish Disco elysium (started and never fucking finished 💀), I want to play Baldur's Gate 3, I mean, I purchased it at full price and I can't even play the game??... 😮‍💨 You get the point. At this point I wouldn't consider this a "goodbye," note, not... necessarily? I just get so frustrated having no storage, not to mention the fact that I need storage to literally do the stuff I do, like make edits, make poses, make renders, so the fact that I can't even do that, is just like... what's the point of even having Sims 4 anymore at that point? But I don't wanna leave simblr, I don't want to stop creating. It's funny, as I write this, I continue to give myself more and more of a reason to leave, the only real thing that's stopping me is just the fact that there's so many nice people here, I know that if I stopped playing the sims 4, I'd probably move onto another game (BG3................,,,,,..) and leave tumblr, or, at least leave Simblr. Which as I (think) said before, that's sad, I'd be sad, I'd miss people like Lori (groovetrys) and Lauren (miralure), June (circusjuney), Jade (gamyrmaiden), Anna (holocene-sims), butter (buttertrait), Fae (acuar-io), Verco (vercosims) and god, so many others, and sorry to break the atmosphere suddenly, but as I'm writing this, I'm listening to "In another life," from Everything everywhere all at once and it's making this very emotional for me, so if it gets sappy I apologize.
And I guess to be... insanely honest, as much as I want to release my story (trust me, I REALLY want to), I'm slowly beginning to realize more and more how not-easy it's gonna be to make scenes, writing it is fine for me, its just setting up the scenes feels like i'm forbidden to a life of staring at a bunch of words (pose names) trying to figure out what's what, where is what, what to do, where is where, who is who, who is what, how is what, how and why, need I continue. Storytelling is so insanely important to me, I believe that despite how little I read and despite how terrible of a student I have been, and despite how poor my literature skills are, that storytelling is still so important, fuck it, poetry has been such an inspiration for me, but I don't fucking know how to write poetry?? I can barely understand poetry at times, but it's still all so beautiful to me, the concept and the fact that people use metaphors so meticulously to create an allegory for something beautiful, or traumatic or sad, like in not so berry, the concept of an ocean being alexanders "love," and cataleya drowning in it, and her realizing she's drowning in his "love," but when she wants to leave, she really wonders if she actually wants to leave, to conceptualize and create this awful relationship in the means of an ocean is so... well, not beautiful in a reality sense, but in a technical/literary sense, it's beautiful, it's expression, and THATS what im passionate about. Remember what I said about getting sappy? Yea, sorry about that. After a while, I wonder what good repeating myself does, I've said about 5 or 6 times that I don't want to leave, yet here I am, with the mouse over the uninstall button like an idiot about to press the big "DON'T TOUCH" button, perhaps it's the idea that after repeating myself over and over again, that maybe I'll make up my mind, do I do a coin flip? I never listen anyways, I always continue to flip until it lands on what I like. So... why am I still writing? To be honest, I should've stopped by now, but you can only stop a dam so much before it all comes out. I do this with my friends, when I'm sad, I pour my heart out until it's a repetitive and overcooked version of "I'm sad." I write paragraph after paragraph and I literally could've just said "I don't have storage. Considering leaving simblr," and the same message would've gotten across, and I apologize, if you're still reading this, for making such a lengthy post, but I couldn't quite help spilling a bit of water everywhere, although I guess now my little puddle of water has become a flood. I use metaphors a lot, I apologize... again.
So what does all this bullshit that I typed out mean?
I don't know. I wonder the same myself, I'm fighting a battle more fierce than the one I had with my period last week, "Do I uninstall Sims 4 so I can have more freedom, and enjoy more content? or do I continue this rigorous battle of needing storage for the sake of a tumblr page, my enjoyment for writing and other shit I do in the sims 4?" I cannot say I will take a hiatus, because I will procrastinate, and I will forget completely about posting, and tumblr in general. I do still, at the very least, want to release my Official Teaser for my story, whether it be my last post or not, and at the very least, I want to introduce you to the characters, whether it be my last post(s) or not. Not to mention the fact that I want to continue sharing about Roo even if it's not about sims 4 anymore, I mean hell, I haven't even finished off the Leo and Roo part of his timeline.
For an INCREDIBLY watered down answer on whether or not this is goodbye, I say to you, not in this moment, not definitive enough for you yeah? Well, that's the thing, I don't have a definitive answer, you could fucking tear apart this entire college essay mat-pat style, and still not have a definitive fucking answer, and that's because I don't, sorry to all the people who don't want to listen to me rant or who want a clear answer, but I just don't have one. I've been known to make impulsive and on the whim (when I'm really emotional) decisions, and this is a situation where I don't want to do that, because I care about what I have here with ya'll.
If this ends up being one of my last posts, I bid you all adieu, I love you all, and I thank you so so so much for the laughs, and for the mutual connection we may or may not have had, I do not know if I'll make any actual posts for the next few days as I consider my decision, I will float around of course and continue reblogging this and that, and commenting and liking, etc etc. There's also a chance I may wake up tomorrow and look at this and think I was just being overly emotional about this stuff, and that now I look like an idiot, which is the case 9 times out of 10.
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hey you seem to really know your stuff with titanic and im curious if you can tell me more about that night? a lot seem to think everyone either just drowned or froze too death, but i have a feeling it was a lot more awful than people realize, considering all the jokes people make about the sinking they seem clueless to the fact this was a very bad and awful way to die, for everyone on that ship, especially the third class :/
you know, ive always thought i didnt know that much about titanic but as ive sat here parsing through what i do know, turns i know a lot more than i thought.
and unfortunately, anon, youre very right, it was a horrible way to die, especially so for the third class.
quite a lot of people did drown or freeze to death which are horrifying ways to go by themselves.
at the time, evacuation plans for big oceanliners were shit so a lot of people wouldnt have gotten their lifesavers on, and off the top of my head, i wouldnt be able to tell you how many people could swim back then, but it was certainly less than today. it was only in the 90s that swimming became a compulsory part of the curriculum in schools in the uk, so unless you had reason to know to swim, you probably didnt know if you were british.
and i dont think i need to go into the biology of drowning to tell you its not a fun way to go. its fucking painful, for one, and two, you would have been terrified if you drowned during a fucking shipwreck.
it was also very cold, unsurprisingly. its the north atlantic. it was about 28°F or -2°C which is a lethal temperature. for some reason, a lot of people think that freezing is a relatively peaceful way to die; its not. i cant speak myself for how awful being so cold youre shivering is (i cant really feel the cold because of nerve damage but thats beside the point), but everyone ive spoken to about it resoundingly says its fucking awful. you also experience disorientation, muscle stiffness, excruciating pain in your extremities as your body pulls circulating blood from them to keep your vital organs going, and if youre very unlucky, you might also get frostbite (which can kick in under 30mins) which will add some burning pain.
an added kicker to the cold is that even if you can swim, the shock of cold water might make it harder. im pretty sure shock also likely killed people outright.
another way of dying if you made it out of the boat and into the water (spoiler: several people didnt) is if you were too close to the funnels when they collapsed, you would have been crushed by 62ft tall metal funnels. dozens died that way and if the crushing didnt kill you, you would have either drowned or frozen to death soon after.
you could have also been killed by any number of things that fell from the ship, especially as the stern (the end bit) began to lift up before the ship finally broke in two.
mind you, all of this happened in almost darkness. the engineers kept the lights on as long as they could but eventually they cut out and part of what made the iceberg so hard to see was the fact that it was a new moon.
one of the other things that made it hard to spot is one of the few not good things, but better: the ocean was relatively calm. it made it hard to spot icebergs because you can normally watch out for the foam of the water as it splashes on them. although it led to the sinking itself, it did make launching lifeboats possible (its hard as hell to launch lifeboats in violent ocean today let alone the dinky little wooden ones back then) and those in the water werent being thrown around as much as they could have been. though thats not saying much.
and of course, there are those who didnt make it out of the boat. movies did not lie to you about that although they did lie to you about the specifics.
historical record suggests that they did not purposefully lock third class passengers below deck like many movies show. testimony from the few third class passengers who survived indicates this which is why im likely to believe it. they were able to get up on deck, but it also wasnt easy to do that.
now, crew have said in the haste of the evacuation, they didnt remember to tell the third class passengers the plan. now is that true or is it just a more favourable story to tell during the inquiry? i cant say, for sure. either could be true and both highlight how we treated the poor in society back then (and as a poor, its reflective of today). as such, many third class passengers simply left the cabins and waited outside to be told what to do and that didnt happen. eventually, they made their way up themselves, some due to the fact that they could see the rising water.
and not all of them made it to deck. some chose not to, and again, going off third class survivor testimony here which is why im willing to believe it. theres a specific story about a woman who put her baby on her lap and simply played the piano until the atlantic rose to meet her. another of a man who told his brethren that he was too old to fight the atlantic, and simply lit a cigarette and waited.
others got lost because titanic was a large ship and it was very easy to get lost. especially in the panic of a sinking ship and under lights that are getting dimmer. luckily, some crew remembered oh shit the poor people exist and went down to help any that needed it, so some were led out but that doesnt mean they all did.
also, sadly, it probably wouldnt have helped. similarly to the engineering crew that kept the engines going as long as they could before evacuating themselves, there simply werent enough lifeboats and they were all or almost all gone.
additionally, there were no lifeboats on the third class deck space so they had to make their way to either second or first in order to get into a lifeboat. dont quote me on this because i might have the wrong place, but this is where there was a locked gate for third class. luckily, they snapped the lock off of it and got the fuck out.
anyway, back to those inside. now some of the people trapped inside likely drowned, especially those trapped in the bow as it slowly filled with water and began to sink into the water. the risk of drowning also got worse, once things like walls and doors gave out and in comes a rush of freezing cold sea water.
but that isnt the only likely fate. a rush of water can push quite a lot of things and terrifying speeds which meant people would have been killed via blunt force trauma or being impaled on something. especially for those in the stern (again, the back bit) as it lifted because gravity is not helping here. those still trapped inside would have held on for dear light as the light slowly dimmed and became redder before finally cutting out as the ship broke in two.
now if you were in the stern and escaped death via drowning, blunt force trauma or impaling, you would have definitely been killed by water pressure. see, the bow was able to fill with water relatively slowly and equally which is why its still decently intact on the seabed because it sank relatively slowly. the stern did not and thats why the stern looks like an underwater crash site. as the stern sank, it sank quickly which meant there were still air pockets inside as it sank. and as it came down, the pressure built and soon the people above water could hear what sounded like explosions. it would have been a quick death, but thats the most i can say.
i cant speak for if any kind of sealife killed anyone. i havent heard of any testimony of that and i dont know whats there in the north atlantic to kill people. i assume theres something there, but i couldnt tell you what.
im also sure i missed some forms of death, but off the top of my head, thats what i got.
and yeah, it wasnt pretty and most of the people who died were third class or crew members.
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fuckingarataswespeak · 11 months
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Let me tell you about my morning
Ok so a few facts to start off with:
I really like maths (I'm not a whiz but I really enjoy it)
My phone never dies, I always make sure it is charged
I just graduated secondary school (highschool) and in ireland you have to sit tests at the end of school called your leaving cert which is your entire grade that gets you into a college
I did an alternative leaving cert course these last two years called the leaving cert applied (LCA) which is like a practical (and easy af tbh) version of the leaving cert, which does have exams at the end of the school, but is mostly consisted of projects throughout the year which gets you your credits
Because I really like maths, I was losing my mind in the LCA maths class, as it was literally so so so easy I wanted to explode, so my year head and course coordinater told me that i could take off certain LCA classes in order to do maths with the mainstream leaving cert
I was asked if I wanted to sit the mainstream leaving cert maths exam and I said yeah, since I had basically spent a year teaching myself the course (i only got to got to a couple of the maths classes a week so i mostly just studied for fun in my free time) but then I was told something along the lines of "no actually you cant sit the maths exam because blah blah blah stupid ass reason" literally like 2 days before exams started
The maths exam is split into 2, Paper 1 and Paper 2, each done on different dates.
Ok NOW we get into how my morning started off like.
I had no exams today so I was sleeping in like a normal person on a free day. I wake up to hearing sharp knocking on my front door. I am not clothed, as it was a warm night so i go "nah, fuck this" and go back to sleep.
The knocking happens again, and my brother goes down to answer the door. I hear someone talking to them and saying to wake me up in an urgent voice, so I spring out of bed and throw some clothes on.
I go downstairs to see 2 teachers from my school outside my house going "ABBY QUICK GET IN THE CAR YOU CAN SIT THE MATHS PAPER 2 EXAM!!!! IT STARTED AT 9:30 BUT IF YOU GET THERE BEFORE 10 YOU CAN STILL TAKE IT" (it was like 9:50-ish at this point)
One of the teachers was my school chaplain (Ms X) and the other was the one that helps organize the exams (Ms Y), both very lovely ladies. Ms Y goes "ABBY I RAN A RED TO GET HERE, I'VE NEVER RUN A RED IN MY WHOLE LIFE", and then ms X added "Yeah and she screamed FUCK while she did it"
So i grab my bag and hop in the car and
my god we
ZOOMED
there.
This woman who seemed like normally a very sensible driver broke SO MANY LAWS to get me there.
She ran 3 red lights. She wasn't "pushing the yellows". These were fully red lights she went through, at definitely speed limit breaking speeds.
Ms X jokingly asked if I wanted her to pray and i was like FUCK IT yeah sure and so we all started praying that my exam would go well and that we wouldnt be pulled over by the guardaí, or alternatively, die on the way there.
When we got the the school my vice principal was waiting for me and he opened the car door and i was told to leave my bag and we ran up the stairs together, and i got in just in time.
When i got out, made my way home and checked my phone after I charged it, I saw almost my entire family as well a bunch of staff members had been texting and ringing me to wake up for the exam
Anyways, as for how the exam actually went? It wasn't bad! I definitely did the very best I could've, considering i hadn't taken my adhd meds, I hadn't studied for like over a week for it, hadn't had breakfast and nearly lost my life on the way over
Anyways that was one of the most intense and fun mornings of my life

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impostorsshow · 4 months
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Hello Tumblr city I have nightly doodles
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This time it was just finishing up old doodles since I only gave myself 2 hours, and uh. I also had a Garfield x Tom sketch but I decided not to finish that one also if you want to hear about my DSAF au that goes with the image click the read more below
Close up of the image along with the ref I used i wouldnt recommend clicking on any of my images for higher quality since my coloring is very unpolished
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Anyway this au is pretty simple but I highly enjoy it so I'm going to rant about it past my bedtime - essentially, I looked at how the good ending is a pretty sad ending, and while it's great when the canon/best endings in games aren't the best outcome, I wanted to fix it /j. Specifically I wanted a good ending for Davenport, fuck the children fuck everything else let's take the morals of the Dave endings in the games and fucking run with them.
So i uh haven't replayed the game in a long while forgive me for mistaking a few details but it follows the ending where you salvage davetrap, and Jack doesn't go past the second layer of the flip side and never meets Dee, but instead of Henry possessing Jack or whatever the fuck happened there, Jack starts to work on a solution. I should mention this is a world where Jack never gets a new phone guy but listens to all of Henry's tapes - but Jack gathers the fact that daveyrap is unhappy because hes not a complete soul, and devises a plan. That plan is just to work with both Dave's, making sure davetrap doesn't cause his business to go under due to child murder but he can't completely stop him and working with flipside Dave to both figure out how to make a robot vessel that looks like Dave and could reasonably pass as looking like a human since it wouldn't need anything for programming or ai or movement that possession would be capable of, and to convince flipside Dave to try and be a complete soul again.
Because from what I've gathered, the whole soul thing means thag when the "child" or in Dave's case the part that doesn't want to deal with murder part of the soul goes away to the flip side, the soul is torn apart since there's still something with a mind in the animatronics, it's just left without the reason part of itself. If we incorporate remnant lore which I'm not going to go very far in it further exemplifies the point that Dave repossessing himself over and over tore his soul apart while normal dead kids just leave the remnant behind but whatever whatever Jack decides that if the two halves of the soul exist in one body again they can merge back together and become one soul capable of the full range of emotions, including happiness.
Also my jacks a bit fucked up in the head because this jack went to Vegas twice and killed the real Fredbear so he's on a slippery slope of almost becoming a Henry Miller pulling this shit and asking Dave to continue repossessing himself, but instead risking losing his soul entirely by asking him to possess something that doesn't have any connection to his dead body. And it works when the "it looks exactly like Dave but he can't go in the rain and doesn't smell like a rotting corpse anymore and also doesnt have nearly as many scars" robot vessel is built and the two try possessing the body. And then Dave helps Jack make a robot body for himself and is built in like 1/3rd of the time since Dave knows how animatronics work and not smelling is a pretty nice feature, except Jack doesn't actually *have* a soul so for all intents and purposes I have no clue how to fix that so the jack body is just sitting in the closet of jacks house useless but it's there.
And like then there's actual lore but I need to go to sleep since I have school tomorrow but Dave and Jack decide to keep running Freddy fazbenders considering Jack doesn't have a problem with murder, and the two soul halves in davetrap argue enough that the murder keeps to enough where Freddy fazbenders just seems like a hotspot rather than it actually needing to be a place in need of getting shut down for an investigation. That and Jack blackmailed the phone guy I forgot his name into helping them cover shit up in exchange for getting a hell of alot of freedom [for a phone guy it's a lot of freedom at least, Fredbears isn't a stranger to murder coverups even if it goes against his morals.] Also the nice part of Dave is only really staying with davetrap because he cares so much about jack because I do support Davesport but I try to keep it at a level of implication so it can be passed off as platonic if someone wants it to be
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faelapis · 1 year
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Mr. Felix Faelapis, I remember you wanted to do a vid talking about how ppl needlessly trashed on SU. Considering this year is the 10th anniversary of the series, I would love to see the video. Maybe you can talk about different ways to analyze media and how they would help to give a better analysis of su? Idk
i don't remember if i said this publicly, but the reason i quit after a few youtube videos is mainly that my computer just isnt powerful enough for the kind of editing i wanna do. even a few cuts is enough for it to heat up like crazy. after enough cuts or elements, it was hellish waiting like 5 minutes for it to process me trying to cut a clip by two seconds. it just wasn't worth lol.
i could maybe see a future where i make either shorter videos, or videos without much editing where i just speak over a static image, but honestly... that's just not super appealing to me personally. idk. i like showing examples of what i'm talking about, and trying out weird experimental stuff (even if i'm not very good at it.)
i'll consider it, but it probably wont happen. i just wouldnt have fun making it, especially not forcing myself to slog through a bunch of badfaith bs just to disprove it. it would be stressful, difficult, and i would constantly be on edge that said youtubers would find me and mock me, so i wouldn't even want it to be seen. sorry.
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hi i'd like to request a SDV matchup thank you ^_^ male interests please!! im an introvert, usually very quiet and calm and rather hard to provoke at times. i'm easily irritated and lack patience with people who don't really think things through (though i grow warm over time as i grow tolerant in SOME cases). im very loyal and reliable as told by my friends and act similarly to a nagging aunt of sorts?? i'm rational and rather stubborn in the things i do but i relent depending on the severity of things. im also quite petty in certain cases.
i've been told it's easy to be around myself as a person, and people are really comfortable to be themselves in my presence. generally, i'm very blunt since i don't know how to phrase my words any better and some people (& even friends) at times, take the things that i say the wrong way without meaning to. i tend to get along with most people as long as they deal with the same mutual respect back.
i'm rather sarcastic and tend to tease a lot out of the fun of it. it's really easy to get me flustered, especially with flirts because the first thing i'd do is laugh and try to get out of there as soon as possible ��� i think use both my words and actions equally since i (usually) follow up with what i say. i have tendencies to be a people watcher and observe people going about their day..
i wouldn't really consider myself the most passionate or enthusiastic person either but i really enjoy listening to those who have one. really makes me happy to see people enjoy the things they do. in a sense, i like when people have the things that i lack (energy, passion etc) i just love seeing it A TON. at times, i also have trouble in wording the things that i want to say so it ends up falling flat at times. so i wouldnt say im the most persuasive person either.
appearance wise, i'm about 5'4 and on the chubbier side of things. i have brown skin, really dark brown eyes and 4B black hair. i have small hands and lots of moles on my body but specifically i have 1 on each cheek. as for interests im really into anything that interests me since i get bored easily. most things that catch my attention are typology, videogames, music and gardening. im also learning to play the bass guitar as well. hope that you have a good night/day!!
Sorry for the delay, here ya go!!
== Stardew Valley ==>
I match you up with…
Sam
Sam isn’t immediately taken with you - not for any good reason, more for his own ignorance and your shy personality.
But when you hang out with him once, he’s immediately glued to you, especially when he finds out you can play bass. You’re instantly part of the band alongside Abigail and Sebastian, and he rewrites songs entirely if only to give you a part to play. You inspire him. 
He loves that he feels comfortable around you, and you’re quickly added to his close friends, maybe even becoming his best friend in a shockingly short period of time. 
He gets when you need a second to word things better, and doesn’t offend easily. He’s there to hear you out and, stubborn as he can be, he’s even more willing to listen to you and ensure you two are clear. 
Getting into a relationship is harder than becoming friends with him, because from my view, Sam needs to mature a smidge before it can happen. 
In his time with you, he learns to think before he acts a little more, and when to argue with you versus when to let it go, etc.
 I imagine he’d be crushing on you for quite a while before becoming a item, acting all shy and it can get awkward, but when he confesses it’s painfully cute. 
You and Sebastian get along well too (he’s a bit jealous). 
He loves when you listen to him talk about his passions. He gets this lovesick look in his eyes when you engage him or get him gifts surrounding his passions, and it makes Abigail and Sebastian gag. 
Then he smothers you with kisses. 
He’s the golden retriever to your black cat, and it’s adorable and sickening for everyone all at once. 
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staliamazing · 3 months
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tag game TEHEH
name: sarah !!!! c'est moi
age: twenty, to be twenty-one soon-ish. i am planning a party. will i go through with it? who's to say.
star sign: taurus sun, capricorn rising, gemini moon. i have beef with geminis so the last one deeply upsets me.
first language: english
second language: je parle français !!
i was near fluent and have my B2 but don't practice anymore. i am considering getting back into it because i feel i need more hobbies and highly regret throwing out all my textbooks and notes. (that's a whole other story i LOVED school and threw out all my damn notes and stuff?!?!? sarah you dumb dumb)
favorite lip product: that lush lip scrub! i've lost my peppermint tub but anticipate it turning up when i least expect it. my lips always has excess skin peeling off for some reason so its great to feel exfoliated!
the best food dish you can make without a recipe? um. pizza bread! pizza, pizza sauce, cheese. eat up friends!
if you drink tea, what kind? none, get away from me. SOMETIMES lipton peach iced tea but only if im at mad mex.
if you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get? see last answer. i get the jitters.
favorite thing to watch on youtube right now: THE BALD AND THE BEAUTIFUL. i;ve been watching upwards of two episodes every night in bed.
favorite thing to watch on youtube in 2012: for sure mormon family vloggers. pick a channel i probably watched them. i have no fucking clue why!
favorite item of clothing right now: new graphic tee! the alice oseman x everpress collab with this gorg patchwork design and all little queer and trans doodles over it! the proceeds went to LGBTQIA+ refugees <3 i fucking love graphic tees holy shit
favorite item of clothing in 2012: some form of graphic leggings im certain.
fandom -
three movies you recommend: the half of it on netflix - watched recently and was confused but pleasantly surprised
your favorite concert: either one i went to with my gf! they were both great experiences even though i was shitting myself before both because i have a lot of sound and crowd sensitiivities ( # actually autistic). i loved being in the pit for ATL despite not knowing any songs and i like how you can feel the music inside you.
have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? no i've actually followed someone because i love getting mad <3 over time i have grown to really respect them and where their views come from which im proud of because i can be a bit close-minded.
the best tv show you watched last year: i watch a lot of shows! recently though i watched euphoria and understood the hype. couldn't rewatch though. it felt like a disservice to the shock factor i feel like the show really feeds off.
do you have a fancasting you just can’t let go of? don't pay much attention to fancasts!
a ship you’ve abandoned: im so sorry amy and rory from doctor who... i legit met them too. it just doesnt hit the same and im glad they divorced. amy was too swept up in the doctor and rory is a damn sweetheart who honestly deserves better. ALSO maya and lucas from girl meets world - bit random honestly why did they do that. lucas and riley from day one. maya and zay!
on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history? 7? depends on who to! anyone on here sure. not real people they'd be like "what do you mean you like fics where that little thug man wears short skirts" they just wouldnt UNDERSTAND
what fandom do you wish was bigger? tori spring fandom! maybe it is and i just dont know but.
do you have a fandom tattoo? yah, the fandom of my high school english teacher! most of my tats are literary inspired and specifically books i read in school for the curriculum.
my others are - phoebe bridgers related
gf related (she tattooed me) (fave fandom) (she's the best)
has a finale ever ruined a show for you? definitely i just can't remember which lmao im sorry
have you…
swam in an ocean? yep! swam is a strong word though. i've been in and bobbed up and down! i usually run from the tide.
been vegan/vegetarian? both! at different times. it was very much part of my friend and family culture growing up.
gone skinny dipping? yes, in my exs best friends dads girlfriends dead uncles pool :) honestly 10/10 swimming with clothes on is so random? i think its so beautiful how people look under the blue wavy water of the pool.
gone skiing? no i am scared of the snow since learning about crevasses in year 4 and almost falling off a ski lift at a very young age. i do love the cold and the ski lodge episode of gmw though.
thanks for the tag @iansw0rld, these are fun :)
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lindszeppelin · 26 days
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I am kind of a fan who is on the outside looking in. The relationship he is in with KG is whatever to me. I am just here for him. However I have been in fandoms where I was deeply involved and had my own fanpage too. I have seen the gf of a singer/actor get torn to shreds over being with him/her. Like the jealousy was hot and heavy. With Austin though? I do not think this is it. Everyone I have spoken to who have stated their opinion have giving well thought and solid feedback. It isnt just a bunch of jealous fake fans foaming at the mouth. Despite of me being neutral about this relationship I can see why people see Kaia the way they do. She seems like she doesnt consider his feelings , she is only known more now for being with him. Hell she is known more for being his gf than Cindy's kid. They both do look miserable too. Even people who arent even close to being in the fandom have called it out so it isnt a delusion. I think it is super unfair of shippers who ride them hardcore to say you and other fans aint shit for not supporting them. The only reason some of them ship so hard is for popularity and attention. Its kind like the annoying sibling who does things because theu know it will get your attention and bug you. Being a fan of his shouldnt be a war. I feel bad for Austin. He is talented and it gets overshadowed by his relationship which to me is on the shippers. If they just chill and let people be and stop inserting KG into everything, the fandom wouldnt be what it is
This is a perfectly nuanced and well said message. Shippers that once hated her guts or didn't like her at all all of a sudden turned 180 and started harassing fans that didn't like her. That kind of behavior is not normal. Instead of disliking her on once side of the spectrum they went to the complete opposite side and instead went balls to the wall. You can just be normal about something. It doesn't have to be extremes on either end. I agree with you that the shippers are only going gung-ho about it for attention, for popularity, and to be accepted by everyone else. Those that dare to speak up and voice their opinion otherwise are shunned and bullied, deemed as tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists, which is insane because anyone can see these two have no chemistry and they don't like each other...which isn't a conspiracy lol.
We can have our opinions and im not ever forcing nobody to have one specific viewpoint. Feel what you feel, but don't be a dickhead and try to indoctrinate people into a war AND into feeling one kind of way, otherwise "you're not a real fan and you don't love austin". They can't think nuanced and differentiated, it's all extremes with them. which is suspect. i like to surround myself with people who can think for themselves, stand in their opinions, and also be open minded.
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autisticempathydaemon · 9 months
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hey hey! idk if this is where I submit for the match up! but I would love to see who you think I'd fit in with! I'm a creative soul who tends to try to develop deep friendships with people above everything. I have a bit of a savior complex as well lol I work hard and play harder, trying to find new adventures to go on with those i care about. I tend to support others before supporting myself, and while im happy to let others open up to me its hard for me to open up in return. the best way i can feel close to someone is deep conversations and being creative with them!
My current fav song has been Maybe IDK by John Bellion, specifically the lyric "i guess if i knew tomorrow i guess i wouldnt need faith"  just the idea of living today to the best you can just because you don't know what will happen tomorrow. the worries of the future should keep you down today
My current fav Redacted audio has to be the Helping your Werewolf bf shift again. Specifically the acting is just so good to me. Erik did an amazing job of portraying Milo's anguish and pain at not being able to shift. Plus the relieved sobs at the end is so satisfying and emotional. 
The one boy i cant get the hype around is Ivan. like sure the yandere thing is somewhat attractive to some, but i just don't like the idea of an actual psychopath being obsessed with me.
my favorite movie is definitely the Secret Life of Walter Mitty by Ben Stiller. its less of a quotable movie and more of i remember every scene very distinctly. its a movie that envelops my own escapism. its beautifully shot, wonderfully acted, and a wholesome story on a rainy day.
my platonic redacted crush has to be Damien. he seems like a blast to interact with and tease. he's a hard worker and is tied close to his goals which i can admire. i would love to body double with him if i had some tasks to get done
space is also 100% my ramble subject when im sleepy, that and greek mythology
My guilty pleasure media is currently the animated shows Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Lego Monkie Kid. despite being kids shows, both of these are beautifully animated and shockingly well written!
I hope that gives you an idea of me! I look forward to who you think i match with!
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Hmm, lots of good tidbits of information to consider. You strike me as really thoughtful, really caring, and I think Lasko could really benefit from a partner like that.
A savior complex, from what I understand, is just wanting to help people and make their lives better, and Lasko’s a guidance counselor, so y’all would have that in common. What’s good about pairing two people like that is y’all could keep each other in line, so to speak. Something that’s important when you’re always looking out for other people is to make sure someone is always looking out for you and vice versa. You and Lasko together would always make sure you’re taking care of others, each other, and yourselves.
Another reason I like the two of you together is that you like being creative with one another as a bonding activity. You know what’s the ultimate way to be creative together? Tabletop role playing games! If you don’t already play, Lasko would be so excited to help you with a character sheet, to help you craft a backstory, paint some mini figurines, go out and buy the perfect game dice and notebooks- the greatest combination of nerdy and cute in a couple.
Song:
There now, steady love, so few come and don't go/ Will you won't you, be the one I always know?/ When I'm losing my control, the city spins around/ You're the only one who knows, you slow it down
One, the whole vibe of “you slow me down, I’ll look after you, we’re here for each other” vibes are exactly what I’m picturing for y’all. Also, Lasko and I are around the same age, and I heard this song a lot growing up. I have some weird, like, emotional resonance with it from childhood, and I think Lasko does too. Like, it makes him nostalgic and longing; maybe he always wanted someone to look after and to look after him, and now he’s finally found that in you.
Runner-Ups:
A very reasonable runner-up for you would be Camelopardalis because he would do a great job making sure you balance work and your personal life and that you don’t put others before yourself too much. A more fun runner-up would be Guy because I love sticking that beautiful Creative Writing major with other beautiful, creative people!
note: thank you for waiting, dear, and I hope you like your match-up! 💕
Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌
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aranarumei · 1 month
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I think simply a character study is a fic that kinda challenges/explores a characters development? Obviously most fics have the characters thoughts in it but the difference between a regular fic about Kagiura and a character study I think would have Kagiura be more introspective (think of how Kagiura&hirano are in chapter one, versus some of their most domestic chapters where things go “unsaid”) I think ppl also use the tag as an excuse to get more nitty gritty about that characters flaws as well as using metaphors/some kind of external situation to characterize that character, like if two characters were feuding over what “justice” means, then it could have them be involved in a low stakes conflict which they implicitly represent their side of that argument but they still end up talking about the conflict without talking about it if that makes sense? It’s basically like “the story is a curtain over the actual story” is the way I think about it
ohh this is a really interesting explanation! first off, anon, thank you for taking the time to write such a thorough response! and brave of you considering how untimely i am about answering asks LOL.
"the story is a curtain over the actual story" does make a bit of sense to me! I think the issue I keep running into is like. this is... kind of how i write most (if not all) of my fics nowadays? take kagiura and hirano for example. if I write a fic and I'm like "hm. this fic is about kagiura & hirano on a valentines day date" the reason I'd be writing that fic would be because I would think to myself "oh i want to explore how hirano and kagiura deal with their relationship when the idea of romance is explicit, because I think hirano is actually fine being romantic, but shies away at the idea of having it be labelled as romance. so this fic would explore that." and so like.... is that a character study? hirano's not doing any introspection about himself because he's oblivious, but the point of the fic is to demonstrate / highlight this aspect of a character. but that's also just how i go into most of the fics I write. its like, "thing happens to character, and i use it to explore this aspect of a character"
I guess if I compare it to stuff I was writing in like, i dunno, 2017 or something, I could find things where it wouldnt count as a character study, like... i guess "kagiura and hirano are in this fantasy au and they are trying to find this rare dragon!" i suppose that's not really a characte study bc while there would be emotional tensions and stuff the plot is kind of more than just a vehicle for their introspection...?
but I think I end up feeling uncomfortable because it's like. well if that's the definition of a character study. boy do i have a lot of things to tag as one. which I feel personally weird about i guess. I think it's just a matter of figuring out where to draw the line, and that "line" is very blurry for me. but anyways, since it's a tag that I don't believe people will run towards or run away from, I'll live with not quite feeling secure whenever I decide to tag stuff. and for all the hand-wringing i just did here, I do think this clarifies the idea a bit more! so thank you!
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coldresolve · 3 months
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i agree with most of your post ! but honestly the one thing i dont get is why wouldnt it make *some* people more "obedient" or compliant, even in the future? i'm a victim of abuse which is in a way similar to torture, just more long term. for years and years after it was over, i was still considered "obedient" like i did not stand up for myself, followed what people told me. i've been in therapy and it helped but i still get in that "mindset" sometimes.
so not that i disagree but i dont think it's true in all the cases. for some peeps who are already "inclined" to be obedient (for lack of better word) it could push them that far. that is what happened to me, but yes it wasnt pernament because now i see things thru more and try to actively not think like that.
or maybe my situation is deemed too different, i dont know. but i just think it should be both. some people get more defiant, some people get more obedient. it depends on personality and a lot of stuff i think !
but for what it's worth i fully agree that it wont bring you information. people would most likely lie or make something up even when tortured. or i dont know. thats what i would do !
im not an expert in abuse, and while i get that there are similarities in the consequences of torture and abuse, and that torture is often done within a context of other forms of abuse, and that there's a degree of arbitrarity in the definition of what constitutes as what - there is still a difference, in my opinion. abuse as the slow burn, versus torture, the explosion. i guess it just depends. my post was specifically about torture.
what i mean by 'obedient' isn't just learned helplessness, it's the notion that torture can cause a person to willingly conform to whatever their torturer wants them to. which is torture apologia. as in, im not just saying that for shock value, it is actual torture apologia.
but even reluctant compliance is complicated when it comes to torture, it depends on a host of things. and this can also easily slip into torture apologia, too - there's a reason i brought up the notion of corporal punishment as a crime deterrent in that post. i was gonna write a decent long thing about it, got as far as reading up on a couple of studies, but then i remembered that @scripttorture has done all that leg work already and is better at wording these things than i am lol. here's a good post saying it's complicated. heres another telling you why brainwashing isn't real. quote from the latter:
It suggests that survivors are controlled by torturers. That torture can ‘force’ people to change their strongly held beliefs. It suggests that because of these two things survivors are dangerous and this is a line of thought that is used to bar real survivors from real help. None of that is true. This is not how torture functions.
And another, with another solid quote:
Torture radicalises. It creates entrenched, lasting opposition. It breeds hate. If you want obedience in your story, then the first thing you need to do is remove all physical abuse. Including things like sleep deprivation, bad cell conditions and solitary confinement. All of these make obedience less likely.
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hii i just finished reading all of your monsterfucker fic and it was so nice(for lack of a better word) and i loved it. i read almost all your fics and i think youre an excellent writer! i was wondering something while reading this fic, and not to get too deep with some pwp, but do you think the fact that mermaid buck fares fine during the tsunami or that angel buck saves eddie in war, it indicates that in your story, had they been human, they wouldnt have survived the disasters they did in canon? did you ever consider giving buck 6 wings?
on the other hand, i liked how you made vampires be weak to running water in further than blood i thought it was a really nice touch
sorry for rambling in your ask but i wanted to know i really appreciate your writing and will eventually end up reading all of them 💕💕
@mistmarauder you're not the only one who wants Buck to have more than two wings!
I did in fact consider giving him six wings but chose not to for three reasons. The first is sex logistics. I'm a masochist but not enough to make myself try and write a sex scene that involves six wings you gotta deal with. The second is that Buck is slowly falling as is hinted at throughout the fic and implied at the very end - his powers and angelic nature are diminishing the longer he stays human and the greater his love to be with Eddie and the rest of the 118 grows. When Buck says he wants to "grow a soul" so he can be human like Eddie, that's precisely what he's doing. So the fact he only has two wings now is part of that - he's slowly falling and he's not at the height of his angelic powers anymore. The third is that in putting Buck in human form as punishment and having him cut off from Heaven, he can't fully manifest his angelic form, hence the limit on wings.
In the mermaid!Buck fic, Buck still would have survived the tsunami, but being a mermaid made it a lot easier for him to survive and to save others - I imagined he'd been able to save more people than in canon since he could breathe underwater and swim faster and with more power. A mermaid is still at the end of the day as vulnerable to a big ocean wave as, say, a fish or a dolphin. So he wouldn't be entirely unscathed but he'd have a better time of it.
In the angel!Buck fic, the implication is that yes, Eddie and his entire unit would have died in the helicopter crash had Buck not defied orders and saved Eddie (who in turn saved most of his unit).
There is no such thing as "too deep" on my monsterfucking fics! I love mythology and creature lore and I put a lot of thought into those fics even if they are 90% about kinky sex, and I'm happy to talk about that lore! It delights me when readers notice and care about the worldbuilding.
Aha thank you, I'm glad you liked the running water bit! I didn't make that up, but took it from vampire lore - Dracula for example is vulnerable to running water and can only cross the ocean while in a coffin filled with earth from his homeland. While on a boat he's fairly weak and has to be careful. Other vampire stories have made use of this, but it's not a commonly known vampire weakness so I had a lot of fun surprising people with it in the fic. It was a delightful convenience that two of the traumatic life-endangering things that happen to Buck and Eddie have to do with running water so I could use this!
Thank you again for reading and I'm so glad that you enjoyed these stories so much!
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