#i'm so fucking tired guys

[shu-of-the-wind]

this is the third fuckin time today i've seen people throw the "queer people were killed during the holocaust too shut up" shit at jewish folks so i will say it ONE MORE FUCKING TIME because i am TIRED OF THIS: the reason queer and trans people were targeted by the nazis is because the nazis were antisemitic. the nazis believed that any and all societal "degeneration", including queer people, was caused by jewish people and judaism in general.

cw nazism, shoah, discussions of shoah, transphobia, discussions of mein kampf and hitler's worldview, discussion of nazi legal theory, etc below the cut

the entire fucking reason that queer and trans folks were targeted by the nazi regime is because they were seen as a direct representation of the impact of jewish people on aryan society. magnus hirschfeld, who founded the institute for sexual science, was a jewish man. that is not a fucking accident.

hitler believed that the world was solely ruled by the quote-unquote law of the jungle; that is, people had to suppress any tendency for mercy or compassion in themselves and take what they wanted to survive. carl schmitt, a nazi legal theorist, believed that "politics arose not from history or concepts but our sense of enmity; our racial enemies were chosen by nature, and our task was to struggle and kill and die." (quote from black earth by timothy snyder.) hitler believed that jewish people who "introduced the false distinction between politics and nature, between humanity and struggle. . . . [that] ideas of political reciprocity, practices in which humans recognize other humans as [human], came from jews." (id.)

to the nazis, recognizing trans people and queer people and queer identities was a distinctly jewish idea. which is not to say it's not impossible that nazis would have targeted queer people without the antisemitism component, but their rhetoric was always interwoven with antisemitism and antisemitic racial hygiene arguments. you cannot separate the murders of queer and trans people during the holocaust from antisemitism. that violence was born from it.

#i'm so fucking tired guys #cw holocaust #cw shoah #i'm goy but also i'm working on conversion so like. if i didn't say something i would have exploded #antisemitism #transphobia #nazis #nazism discussion #cw nazis

[koumeowkami]

nvm i might actually start gatekeeping cozmez after all

#every twin duo has weirdos in their fandoms but czmz... they have it WORSE #i'm so fucking tired guys #🌸 ; lyn rambles about stuff

[janetbrown711]

Ahahahahahhahahahaha I love how a person can leave a server and then come back because of mental health, and completely regain all authority and power without any question, but if you dare act even the slightest bit rude because of mental health that you then apologize and better yourself and your actions for to genuinely show signs of improvement, then fuck you

Anyways mental health totally matters guys we should all take care of each other

#fucking kill me #janet blabs #the worst part is that I fucking called it #I knew my time was limited #I knew i'd be kicked out the moment the rule said 'hey if you're mean you're getting kicked out zero question' #this person doesn't even KNOW ME #we've never so much as held a fucking conversation and yet she thinks she understands me and my relationships with these people #I was in a bad headspace and acted bitchy at the time i'll admit #i vented a bit to unwilling participants which i've apologized sincerely for and haven't done since #and that's the key !!!! I fucking changed my actions #but because she doesn't even fucking know me and is just offended on behalf of these people she just kicks me out #you know what bitchy things I did? #I made jokes about monsterfucking being odd. you know. like the other half of the 'hear me out' meme? #I know it was bad for those I affected and I'm not lying when I say I haven't done it since #I don't get why these people hold such godawful grudges against me when I didn't even hurt them directly and those I did I apologized to #and I haven't made the same fucking mistakes since !!!! #GOD #just #*sigh* #I'm so fucking tired guys #I'm so so so so tired #I can't keep doing this #I can't keep being kicked out of every friend group #everyone tells me I'll find people who appreciate me and I can click with but every. single. time it goes south #is there something wrong with me??? #I feel like there has to at this point #god.... #anyways yeah #what a lovely way to start february #vent

[parkersloths]

A bit late but oh well, it's still the 21st somewhere and this is more of a bday week thing anyway ;u;

I actually didn't have time to draw a new pic cause I've been super busy but I still wanted to do something so here's an edited/more finished version of the first Käärijä pic I tried drawing then left as a WIP, with a little bday tiara of course! Seriously though, I hope he had the best day, his music and general silliness have brought me a lot of joy and smiles and other nice vibes so yeah I just really appreciate this weird little green guy ;u;

#fanart #käärijä #jere pöyhönen #kiitos käärijä for helping me get out of my artblock #i could say so much more #but I'm tired af and should go sleep #worked on this while listening to huhhahhei the whole time #and yeah fuck okay you guys were right this really his best far #it's so fucking good #I might draw a more cheerful bday thing later if I find the time someday X'D

[kotdish]

HEAVY TF2 TUMMY ‼️‼️‼️

🥱🥱🥱 take your hairy man

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 heavy #heavy tf2 #my art #guys i'm so fucking busy this was sooo fun to draw but omg my grades 😭 #yeah i know i drew the box backwards just flip your eyes ok i'm tired

[mikakuna]

the way people care more about jason fighting tim than like any other rogue fighting tim during his robin run is...!

"they're brothers! jason is so horrible to attack his little brother."

aside from the obvious twinkification of tim, stop pushing the family narrative on two people who did not see each other as siblings at that moment.

#and also stop seeing tim as a 5 year old #jason fought him to prove a point #sometimes i wish he really did some serious damage to tim just so you guys would have something reasonable to complain about #gosh a 16-17yr old crime fighter who fights people like bane for a living definitely has trauma from a guy two years older than him #fighting him #yes jason todd the kid who was murdered for being robin would definitely go out and kill the next kid who is robin #because yessss his whole point is that he's jealous of the next robin and therefore needs to harm him worse than the joker harmed jason #like please i'm so tired of this discourse #why the fuck would jason- the child murder victim who died as robin and bc of batman taking on a child soldier- want to kill the next robin #you'd think the narrative that jason tried to kill tim would only be in like some fics #but nope! it's in every goddamn batfam fic i've ever read to this day #not even exaggerating #anti tim drake #anti batfam #jason todd #red hood #batman #dc

[flyingcakeee]

Can't even be on TikTok..

Again, let's look at the full picture of how it was a chain reaction that was bound to happen when everyone bunches up like that when you should've taken the corner as you previously did under the safety car so Lance has some fault but it's literally not entirely his and yeah..

Also, Lance locked up because he desperately tried to brake so he did use his brake ^^ His tyres weren't allowing him to brake because of the lockup ^^

#I'm so tired guys. #you can literally see on Lance's onboard that someone ahead locked up (Fernando) and that before that they started to accelerate a little #they could've taken the corner at that speed and they speed they slowed to was extremely slow even for that hairpin #oh yeah did you also know that Lance was mad at whoever caused the chain reaction and not Daniel? and that's why he was upset over the pen? #also reportedly Laurent Mekies told Daniel that Lance was blaming him when Lance never mentioned his name #and it is super fucking easy to imply that Lance was upset over who caused the mass brake check #and Daniel almost couldn't stop himself and rear ended Piastri #please I fucking beg that you all pay attention to the entire picture and not just the big incident because you get so much more info 🤗 #lance stroll #f1 #formula 1

[hamartia-grander]

I'm a real tragedy enjoyer but Luis's death is no longer narratively enjoyable for me, now it just feels like an insult. I'm tired of characters having to die to be "redeemed". It's not their death that is the redemption, it's the fact that they were willing to die in the first place; it's the intent of sacrifice. I much prefer a narrative where Luis survives and is forced to every day atone for his past mistakes. I much prefer when characters don't get the respite of death, when they have to live with their demons, when they have to face their past and maintain their growth. And it's especially maddening when the only reason Luis dies is because he did in the original. They'll change his character so much to give him substance but they won't change his fate? I don't want that.

#Rant I guess. Idk the more I think about Luis's death the more I realise why it's never really satisfied me narratively #resident evil #Luis Serra #Luis Serra Navarro #Resident evil 4 remake #Resident evil 4 #Re4 #Re4 remake #Re4r #Luis Babygirl Serra #Like. One of the things I love so much about star wars the last jedi. Besides it being the best SW movie. Is that Finn doesn't die. #He is so ready to sacrifice himself and that's a big significance to his character development. But he doesn't. Die. #Because it's not death that redeems you it's the intent of sacrifice in the first place #If someone wasn't willing to die for a cause and they did that doesn't make them a martyr that doesn't mean they're redeemed #Look at kylo ren! Fuck that guy! He wasn't redeemed at all! Yet he died #Idk I'm just. I'm just tired of Luis's death not being given more thought like the rest of his character was #At first I was like ah yes I love the tragedy of it but now I'm just tired

[vinecoveredgarden]

Paraphilias are Queer because "Queer" doesn't mean "gay" - it means fucking queer. It means "Society at large doesn't like this thing and it deviates from the norm, often with negative reactions or repercussions".

Paraphilias aren't orientations any more than whether you like blonde women or brunette women is an orientation - it's an attraction, it's a preference, it's a "I like this one".

Saying "Paraphiles aren't Queer because <thing they're attracted to> aren't a gender!" is fucking stupid. Do you hear yourself?

Are trans people queer? Are aro/ace people queer? But being trans has nothing to do with sexuality! And aro/ace people don't even HAVE a gender they're attracted to (in their respective attraction types - loving aces and horny aros I see you)!

Being a Paraphile is Queer because it goes against what society deems "acceptable". This doesn't make a paraphilia an attraction - it just makes it Queer.

You can be the most fucking cishet motherfucker alive and still be Queer for being fucking GNC. Not bisexual, not ace or aro, not agender or non-binary, just not preforming your gender "correctly". In the same vein, you can be the most allocishet on the planet and if you've got a paraphilias, congrats! You're fucking Queer!

#''being a paraphile isn't queer because-'' shut up #shut up right fucking now #go stand in the corner and think about what you did #propara #rq safe #rq #I am so fucking tired #I haven't even been here that long and I'm tired #this goes for disability and ND too I just didn't have room for your guys in the post

[dollypopup]

like. . .are any other Polin fans out there that do not give a singular flying fuck about Debling? we should form a club lol because from the very bottom of my heart and with my whole chest: I could not care less about him. Not sorry, I'm tuning into S3 for Pen and Colin and Pen and Colin alone

#polin #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #like. . .i keep seeing all these theories about debling and i'm going '. . .and?' #someone: what if debling- #me: don't care. when is colin back on screen? i miss my boy #because really. . .who gives a fuck? he's a random oc who's gonna be gone by ep 3? #frankly i don't give a shit about him in any capacity #and tbh. . .like it's not even a contest for me. colin is SO much more attractive and appealing than debling #no shade to the actor i'm sure he's lovely but guys. . .luke newton is SO fucking fine #tired: colin gets jealous of debling because he's courting penelope and thus disapproves of them #wired: colin distrusts debling because he's a vegetarian and colin the foodie cannot trust a man who cuts out an entire food group #inspired: colin is friendly to debling and can always hype pen up around him but debling isn't listening because he's queer and likes him #y'all just 'care' about debling because he has no traits rn and you can turn him into your perfect male oc prize for penelope #'i ship pen with options' and i ship pen with colin. . .you know. . .like a polin shipper. . .crazy how that's. . .how it works #anywhoozle i am first and foremost a hater #fellow haters come join me we meet up on tuesdays and we have snacks

[softesttangerines]

As someone who LOVES a good old time travel au, and after seeing amazing fanart of kid!Mihawk i have to let it out!!

I just wanna read a time travel fic where baby Mihawk wakes up and finds himself in the world of adult Mihawk and he's like wtf is going on?

And word goes around that a kid that looks exactly like Hawkeyes and carries the same cross knife as him is roaming around this island and rumors say it's the son he abandoned to fend for himself.

And so, marines and every pirates he ever wronged come after him for revenge and the little guy is just thinking why is everyone trying to get me? While doing his best with his cross dagger to rid of them.

And Shanks, good ol' shanks could have sworn that if his old rival had an 9years old, he would know about it (also he refuses to let the bitter taste in his heart take over unless his own eyes see) so he's skeptical about the whole thing and that's the only thing that gets him to leave his hideout in a reclused ghost island waiting for whatever is his big plan to take place.

News say Red Shanks is on the move after being mia for a few years and everyone got their panties in a twist, what could have raised the emperor from the dead.

He follows from island to island because apparently the young boy knows how to avoid the marines and pirates coming after him.

Till one night, on their stop at some bar on an island that wasn't really on the plan, he sees the boy. Just outside the bar in an alley, where he went to empty his guts from the booze overfilling his body, there stood bloody faced, cross dagger in one hand, a tiny version of his old rival with a bounty hunter's body at his feet.

The boy furrows his eyebrows even more at the new arrival and strikes another pose in case the new guy tries something funny. But Shanks, drunk ass Shanks, who knows his rival by heart is a 100% sure the little guy is in fact his rival for whatever magical reason, there he stands in front of him in the form of an 9years old and Shanks giggles at that -to which the child takes great offense- and just say "hey kid, i'm a friend of your dad's, want me to take you to him?"

#mishanks #Ok so here I'm running with the fandom's theory that rayleigh is mihawk's dad #And after getting all these murder attempts on his person he's just so fckn tired of anyone that approaches him So he's completely on guard #when this red haired dude comes out of nowhere n tells him he knows his dad #Which no one did before all they did was charge at him screaming HAWKEYES YOU'RE GONNA REGRET WHAT YOU DID #And here's the thing #he may be inclined to believe the red haired guy because no one knows his relation to rayleigh #so this guy must really know his dad and he's tired of running all the time he just wants his bed and parents #so cut him some slack when he follows a random one armed red haired pirate #On the other hand the crew is equally creeped out and charmed by the little fella because even young he still installs the chills in them #How can he be as equally as skilled as he is cuuuuute #They try their best not to say it to his face because he threatens to stab them at any given chance but they cant HELP IT #it's Dracule Fucking Mihawk as an 9years old!!!! Ofc he's cute #Shanks cant fucking wait to get his adult Mihawk back to tease the shit out of him about the little version of him lol #When they got him to rayleigh he fckn cried because that's his fckn son znd the last time he saw hus baby that way was more than 30years ag #Mihawk is just confused as fuck why is his dad's grey n have much more wrinklesBut it's still one familiar face so he just sticks to him #The red haired pirate keeps telling him that he should look for him when he gets home but he doesn't understand!!! #He also keeps challenging shanks on a duel once he discovers he's a swordsman and keeps on losing #And truth be told shanks is embarrassed as fuck because it took him his rival being a child for him to win over mihawk #opla #one piece #mihawk #dracule mihawk #red haired shanks #shanks

[a-local-idiots-shitpost]

so because neither Satan or Beel are allowed to have nipples in the newest cards my headcanon is that Angles don't have them, born Demons obviously have them because they are born but most Angels are just made by God and thus they don't have them, Asmo is also the only one with them but that's just because he wanted some cool shaped ones and keeps changing them

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #anyway I'm still mad I can't get nipple less Beel #like fuck that guy being shirtless and everything but I want his card and stupid little outfit #but fuck me I guess because I keep getting Satan thrown at me #local is tired #and seriously shouldn't be allowed to think #but I also think I'm funny so have this #obey me shitpost #I feel like I should tag this too

[spiked-mall-goth]

i need to fight somebody. like a real fight no holding back. i need to punch someone hard in the stomach. i need to be kicked in the guts. i need to be repeatedly slapped in the face. i need to bite someone really really hard. i need to scratch and to be scratched. i need to be knocked over on my ass. i need to kick someones legs out. i need to pin someone down and start punching them repeatedly. i need to do all of this and then fuck nasty. i think that would fix me. even just for a minute

#spikes rambles #but like... no one likes being beat up :< #its just me whose a little fucking freak. #its at times likes these i think of that guy with the clown kink and everybody made fun of him until a stranger got up in a clown getup #and they went down on each other and had such a good time they started dating. #but i dont want to beat up just anybody #i want it to be someone so very special that i love very much :P #too bad the only person i'm even interested in is abt 130lb (if THAT) and literally 5'1. i'd kill her on accident me thinks #anyways im so tired can iu guys tell how tired i am??? openly talking abt like Personal stuff?? wow

[phonydiaries]

Someone's Memory - Lies of P

Takes place during the opera house fight, apologies if I got some lore wrong but it was all done in the name of sadboys

No intended pairing but if you interpret or enjoy this as promeo/carmeo/any ship that’s cool and valid

Warnings: canon-typical violence with a sprinkle of weird robot gore for funsies

---

The glinting puppetstring of the legion shielded P’s eyes from the bright white burst which rippled through the wide open space of the opera house. A flash of heat singed the edges of his coat as his hand lowered and he peered through the billowing smoke. There, descended from his monstrous corpse of a throne stood Romeo, King of Puppets. 

He was somehow more and less regal than Pinocchio had expected- tall and imposing but with a Lear-like posture, as if he’d aged considerably. This was most conflicting, as upon closer inspection he was sure Romeo was a man, but only barely. The half of his face which remained unmarred by char and decay looked hardly older than a boy. This revelation stirred in the puppet an unexpected and unpleasant tightness in his chest, but there was no use in indulging it. He’d do what was expected of him, as he always did. The King’s reign would end here. 

The blade of Romeo’s scythe dragged languid across the floor as he advanced, leaving a faint scrawling along its glassy surface. He drew it slowly behind him and steadied his grip with both hands. 

“I have to kill you.” His voice buzzed, strangely resonant and far away, as if something inside him had broken. “There’s no other way.” 

At this P’s gaze narrowed. He’d sounded almost remorseful. What care did the king have if he lived or died? Was it merely his appearance? Perhaps he was only so moved as P had been at the thought of slaughtering something so convincingly human. Well, little good it would do him. 

His steps echoed in time with Romeo’s and the two watched each other like circling hawks through keen eyes. P’s shoulder flinched back as the blade of the scythe cut through smoky air, staking its claim at the puppets feet. Quickly, he turned on his heels, sidling up behind the king and winding up to strike his exposed back. But as he swung, the blade caught on the outer shell of Romeo’s forearm as he whipped himself around. Suddenly his good eye alit with an expression P couldn’t discern.

“Tricky…” The king said under his breath, the word holding some elusive weight as it left his lips. 

P’s blade slid across the armored limb with a ringing that cut through the air. Foolishly he made a cheap swing for the King’s head, but his opponent was swift and weaved his way out of range. There was no time for P to calculate his next move as Romeo charged for him, the staff of his scythe already flying. Reflexively, P met the weapon with the steel of his own, a resonant CLANG crying out around them. Through sheer force the puppet shoved Romeo’s blade away, forcing an opening just long enough to land a strike to the king’s torso. Romeo’s eyes twitched and flickered eerily between the blade piercing his chest and the face of the puppet that wielded it. 

A wave of fear crashed over P as he jerked the hilt of his weapon uselessly. The serrated edge had caught stubbornly in the King’s mechanized skeleton and refused to budge. Romeo closed a glimmering hand around the weapon and thrashed his body wildly to the side, the inertia throwing P to the floor unarmed. As he scrambled to stand, his back brushed the wall of the arena, still hot to the touch. He was cornered. He watched with unblinking eyes as Romeo seized the hilt, which jutted out from the meat of his shoulder at a strange angle, and ripped it with unfeeling carelessness from his body. He gave it a curious glance before letting the weapon clatter unceremoniously to the floor. 

P’s heart thrummed incessantly as the king met his gaze. Though the fresh wound sparked and smoked, there he stood hauntingly composed. Heat made the air about them grow thick, and auburn flames licked at the heels of the king as he stepped closer. His chin dipped solemnly as he raised the mighty scythe above his head. 

“There’s no other way.” He echoed gravely, fingers curling about his weapon in reluctant duty. His shoulders rolled back and as the blade reached its crest he froze. P’s arm was outstretched, the puppetstring held high, shielding his face. He stared at the unmoving king, puzzled. But as his eyes followed the stark path of the puppetstring’s tether, he discovered the arrowhead buried in the dead center of Romeo’s chest. Before P could blink, the king was dragged before him. 

The sudden closeness shocked him too much to flinch. He stared with a dumb, blank expression, his chest still rising and falling with a quickness at his narrowly-averted beheading. His nose was practically touching Romeo’s, and he squinted in response to the red flicker emanating from the king’s socket. It was then that something in Romeo’s face shifted, a strange softening of features, even those more grotesque, the exposed jawbone of his right half unclenching. His brow turned up and his good eye went foggy, as if suddenly overcome with emotion. 

“...Carlo?” 

The puppet string dislodged from Romeo’s chest with a horrible gnashing sound, ripping through layers of charred metal. With it was pulled a ruptured heart, still beating even half destroyed, in an arrhythmic dissonance. Bits of shrapnel clattered to the floor as the king’s head sunk low and lifeless into his chest. As his legs faltered, P reached out reflexively. He held the fallen puppet firmly and with as much grace as could be mustered, guided his body to rest against a pillar. The king wheezed and his head rolled lethargically against the pillar. The rest of his body went limp. P’s gaze flickered across the face of this puppet in sudden awe. So he’d known Carlo. How? And to what extent?

The king’s body shook with a shudder of a laugh. His speech was strained and yet held a sure and unexpected warmth, perhaps even longing. It was as if new depths previously unknown to even himself had been unlocked by this onslaught of memory. How ironic, the liveliness he knew only on his deathbed. 

P’s throat felt tight. He was sure this was the first time they had met, but it was clear to him now that this puppet- or something inside this puppet- had known the boy from the painting, and well enough that even as he lay dying, still held affections for him. He longed to know more, to hear of all the times they’d spent together. Oh, how he would listen with rapt attention, how he would ask to be told again and again until the retellings were as clear to him as memory. Just as they should’ve been from the start. 

“Carlo, My Carlo… I was sure I’d never see you again, not since-“ the king stopped himself, eyes suddenly twitching with something akin to fear. His gaze locked with Pinocchio’s and his brows knit hesitantly. “You do still know me, don’t you?” He asked. 

He did not know the king, but as he looked upon the poor man, crestfallen, a half crushed heart protruding from his open wound, it seemed horribly cruel to admit this. He conjured up the image of Carlo’s portrait in his mind and made mimic the best he could, imagining the way those lips may have curled and the way those eyes may have crinkled with fondness for this once beloved friend. He nodded assuredly at the king. It was a deception yes, but a kind one. 

“Of course I do.” He said, low and certain. He didn’t care much for words, truth be told. They filled his mouth in a way he found quite displeasing, and never seemed to fall quite the way he intended. But he was aware that Carlo had not shared this same distaste for conversation. 

At this, all the raw and jagged edges of Romeo’s face seemed to soften, awash with relief. This was interrupted quickly with -P could only assume- a sharp pain in the king's chest, which made him wince as he curled in on himself. His eyes squeezed shut momentarily and when he opened them again, he stared up at the ceiling. It was a curious thing, P observed, that he seemed to be looking through the ceiling rather than at it; straight through to a deep and starlit sky.

“Please tell me… do you know what comes after death? Have you felt it?” Asked the king, his gaze still wandering and foggy. This seemed too grand, too important a thing to lie about, and the question startled P. He shook his head apologetically, but the king seemed not to mind, preoccupied with the invisible solaris above him. He let out a sigh that sounded just as sad as it did pretty.

“Whatever it is that comes next, I admit I am afraid to see it alone.” Romeo spoke, the timbre of his voice faltering. 

At this P held an awful feeling in his chest, one of desolate hollowness, a kind of gnawing guilt taking root. He did not care for this at all. With a mind of caring servitude, P knelt before the king. Romeo’s gaze fell from the ceiling, meeting with that of his old friend. 

“Then I’ll stay with you.” P said simply. The corners of Romeo’s mouth lifted in a melancholic smile and he extended his weary hand. P clasped it tight and bowed his head. Romeo’s lids fluttered. 

“Thank you, Carlo.” He breathed. As his eyes gently closed, the inner machinations of the puppet droned to a halt. 

With the king’s hand still in his, P pressed the cold palm to his own cheek and tried to will a memory into place. If there was any part of him that held recollection of Romeo, he wanted desperately to know it. But nothing came. And so in the absence of fact, Pinocchio dreamt something up. He painted a tender scene in his mind, one in which Carlo and Romeo were only boys still, untouched by the world. He imagined them looking up at the stars bedded by cool grass, the world around them quiet and warm. 

As this invented memory faded, Pinocchio pressed a kiss into the palm of Romeo’s hand and folded it neatly against the fallen puppets heart. He wondered if king was a grand enough title to be remembered by, or if friend would be truer, nobler, far more fitting, simple as it was. He left the opera house heavier than he had found it. 

#im not gonna lie i edited this sloppy style I'm so fucking tired rn #combat is obviously inaccurate to gameplay #but it's always okay to sacrifice accuracy for homoerotic fights to the death #didn’t write this with the intention of it being promeo/carmeo/Any ship #but if you interpret it that way that’s totally cool! #guys it felt so weird to not write in second person or in present tense for the first time in months #lies of p #lop #lies of p fanfic #romeo king of puppets #lies of p romeo #my writing #promeo #carmeo

[mashmouths]

does anyone know how to stop the body from keeping score? i have shit to do

#i have shit to do but i'm so bad at both going to sleep and staying asleep that it's been fucking up my life for years at this point #yes this about accidentally sleeping through class this morning but in my defense i had an atomic tummy moment at like 6 am :( which is #kind of my point? an reason for missing sleep shouldn't stop me from participating in my own life and i'm tired of rationing my waking hours #if sleep was optional i would be unstoppable essentially but alas. alack even. specifically a lack of sleep. #girl all the saints have it out for me today for skipping church on a holy day of obligation i guess. well fuck those guys. #a post

[sciderman]

Sometimes i remember a comics moment i randomly came across somewhere, where Sam Wilson mentiones a musical and Steve Rodgers says he doesn't like musicals, to whitch Sam goes "Guess that means you really are straight" and even tho i don't care about Cap America or the Avengers, the moment stuck in me for that quote by Sam. And like....Sci, any ideas if straight men actually don't like musicals or is that bullshit?

actually i think i know more gay men who hate musicals than i know straight men who hate musicals. i've had a drag queen stop me point blank when i was about to sing a barbra streisand song, and i know so many gays who pointedly hate abba. so based on my experience i think the inverse is true. most of the straight men i know are kind of impartial about musicals, but gay men? hate.

my theory is that a lot of gay men don't want to fall into stereotypes, maybe. but thaaaaat's just a theory! a gay theory.

#sci speaks #i'm trying to understand the gays. they are a mystery to me. #i've seen a lot more toxic masculinity coming from gay men than i have from straight men. #i think it makes sense. they have less women in their lives. so they reckon with a lot more masculinity. more dick measuring. #also gay men have some of THE most unhealthy romantic relationships i've ever seen in my life. #this isn't a blanket statement on everyone but just from what i've seen. it's such a strange pattern i've observed. #lesbians? healthy. straights? usually healthy. gay men? universally a tire fire that makes me say “if you hate each other so much ??” #“why are you together??????????” #i have never met a cis gay mlm couple in real life that was healthy. every single one of them made my eyes widen in horror. #i want them to be healthy. please treat each other better. #the number of bitchy bitchy fights i've seen between mlm couples in public that make me so terrified #but i know mlm relationships in general are usually less... affectionate than wlw relationships. even and especially friendships. #just an observation. #i hate to say that there is a definite difference between amab vs afab experiences when it comes to relationship dynamics but. #of course there is. there is. as much as i want to say gender and sex do not matter. it really does. #it makes a difference. it does. #which is kind of why i'm glad i was born in the body i was. when people say “trans means you feel you were born in the wrong body” #im like.. i don't think that's true. i don't think that's true for me. #i wouldn't be me if i wasn't born the way i was. and i want to be me. but i'm a boy. i'm a boy but in the body that i have. #my body is still a boy's body. because i live in here. #sorry this went off on a tangent. #but yeah i know my brain would be different if i was amab. and i don't want all those other issues. #i think the only reason i'm so peaceful and serene is because i'm afab. and afabulous. #i see cis guys and im like.. yeah i don't want what you got. #once again! lucky to be me! i'm lucky. im lucky i have a vargooba. thank fuck for that! #couldve been so much worse off. could've been born with a dick and would be fighting for my life right now.