#if i'm being honest.. i lose track of who you are like.. 2 or 3 urls afterwards <3

[sinner-sunflower]

A HH Lucifer-centric AU 9/?

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18, PART 19, PART 20, PART 21, PART 22

Whew! Even though there's so much work later, I somehow wrote a kinda long one.

Also,

I have the major plot points down now. As for the ending, I saw a comic on twitter and will definitely take inspiration for it.

I'm very excited for this.

Will be reqriting this better after it's finished and MAYBE.. I'll have the confidence to post it on ao3.

--------------------------------------------------------

Charlie doesn't dare to move even after her father left. She doesn't know how long she stayed kneeling on the ground, staring at the spot where her dad once was.

She can't stop her tears. Is this stress? No. Maybe it's the daddy issues Husk is always talking about.

She hurt her dad again. But he also caused her hurt first and-

Charlie: No! Oh my god. Do I really think that?

Lately, they are becoming each other's undoing. She knows she has the right to be angry, but ...

She can see that he's really trying. Doing everything she asks of him, fixing the hotel, staying at the hotel to help and support her, even getting along with Alastor - now that she thinks about it, what's up with her dad and Alastor?

That's how Vaggie found her- still on the ground, face adorned with dried tears tracks, and definitely deep in thought.

Vaggie: Sweetie? You okay?

Charlie: Vaggie

The dam broke and she was crying again. Charlie hugs her lover tight. Vaggie's shirt was getting wet from tears and snot but she just hugged back just as tightly.

Vaggie: What happened?

Charlie: D-dad.. he- he- wahhhhh

Vaggie: Is he okay? Did something happen? Did he.. did he do something to you?

Charlie: No, Vaggie! More like I did something to him! He was here, in our room, wanting to talk! But I-I-I was so happy. And then he said he was leaving and-and then he said I'll be handling pride and- I wahhh

Charlie didn't know how she had any more tears left to give. Just rethinking what just happened makes her even more miserable.

Vaggie: Wait, wait. Leaving? Why? Didn't he just got here and what about the thing in Sloth??

Charlie sniffs.

Charlie: He said it's related to it- that he needs to find something, no, someone. He didn't want to go without saying goodbye and I just.. exploded.

She nuzzles her face on the fallen angel's neck.

Charlie: I don't want to lose my dad, Vaggie.

Vaggie doesn't know what to say if she's being honest. She wants to be mad at Lucifer. Like, how could a parent who claims they adore their child amongst everything else abandon said child. Lucifer wasn't there when Charlie wouldn't get out of bed whenever her birthday came up, he wasn't there when Vaggie caught her staring at the family portrait full of wishful thinking, or when she cries calls out to her parents in her sleep, or-

But she can't. Because he's trying just like she was back then. They're both doing a little redemption on their own- it just happens to be for the same person.

So she understands. To hurt and to be hurt.

Vaggie: I haven't known your dad for very long, Charlie. But I can tell that... he cares. Yes, he's awkward, a bit socially inept, and has his own issues. But, there's one constant in everything he does.

Charlie: What's that?

Vaggie: You, dummy. He loves you more than anything. He probably made the deal with Heaven to spare Hellborns because of you, now that I think about it. My point is, there is no way in the seven rings of hell that he won't put you above everything.

Charlie is about to protest but Vaggie cuts her off.

Vaggie: Uh! He will. You know why?

Charlie: Why?

Vaggie: Because you're his daughter. It's just how parents are.

Vaggie pulls them both up and they gaze into each other's eyes lovingly.

Charlie: What would I do without you, Vaggie?

Vaggie: Still be your amazing self, I'm sure. I hope you guys resolve this, though. Maybe you could convince him to try other dating options. I don't like this whole thing going on with your dad and Alastor.

They laugh and share a kiss.

Her girlfriend was right. This is how her dad is. He's willing to be better for her.

I want to be better for him too.

....

Wait.

Charlie: What?!

------------------------------------------

What to look forward to in Part 10:

Lucifer in Sloth.

Going to Earth.

#hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin charlie #hazbin angel dust #hazbin husk #hazbin vaggie #hazbin nifty #hazbin cherri bomb #hazbin sir pentious #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel charlie #hazbin hotel vaggie #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin hotel angel dust #hazbin hotel cherri bomb #hazbin hotel sir pentious #hazbin hotel niffty #hazbin lilith #vivziepop #hazbin hotel au #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel fics #hazbin hotel fic recs #hazbin hotel fanfic #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel imagines #radioapple #lucifer x alastor

[ticklishthoughts1]

Accept your Beauty!

So I wrote this cute lil thing a WHILE back, and decided to post it on here because to this day it's still one of my favorites! (INeedthisinmylifeaseithertheleeorthelerplss)

Compliments are hard to accept sometimes. This is what you thought when You had squeaked out "Nooooo! I'm nooot!" As they Called you Beautiful. You were Absolutely not prepared for the feirce, yet loving look they give you. Slowly, they say "Stay. Right. Here. I'll be back.". The change is so sudden you're shocked into staying Like a Good Little Lee as they go out of the room, coming back with an ungodly amount of pillows and covers. Not able to help yourself, you smirk. What were they gonna do, start a pillow fight? Your question is Promptly answered as they shove you onto the bed playfully, grinning and saying "Stay Still Little One. I have an idea". Genuine Curiosity keeps you still as they begin placing pillows under and around you strategetically, Propping you up to as comfy a position as Possible, and covering everywhere but your face and tummy with the pillows. They then grab the covers, wrapping them around and under you, tucking them in tight. With a start, you realize their plan. Trying to wiggle, you find yourself entirely immoble under the pleasant, gentle weight of the comfort items, and the expert knots They tied using the lighter of the blankets. They Just Mummified You with Pillows and Blankies! They sit where your thighs would be, stretching out, and Whispering "You're Beautiful." You start to protest, but your response is broken up by giggles as they gently begin tickling your tummy. They Start to pepper your face with kisses, punctuating each one with Praise. The Forehead, neck, jawline, cheeks, nose, even the ears, they kiss you all over, tickling your tummy with more intensity every time you protest. kiss You're Stunning! kiss You're Amazing! kiss You're My Entire World! kiss I love you, so much! kiss You are worth it! kiss You are Important, and Special! kiss You are Perfect, AS. kiss YOU. kiss ARE! kisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskisskiss!!

This goes on for anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours, you lose track of time to be honest. All you know is that You're Blushing at the shade of a Cherry Tomato, and Flustered Like Heck, when you finally cave: "OKAHAHAHAHAY! OKAY! I'M ADOHOHORAHAHBLEHEHEHE!!" They Immedeately slow the tickling down, winding to a stop instead of stopping abrubtly so that phantoms don't plague you, and gently, when they're certain you've caught your breath, they say "Say it Again Sweetheart!". You look away, grinning like a fool, and Squeak out "I-I'm Adorable...." You look back up and see the genuine affection on Their face as they kiss you one last time, on the forehead, and untie you, cuddling you under the mountain of soft now. You bury your head into their chest flusteredly, and they gently affirm One last time "You Are Positively Precious, Absolutely Amazing, and such a Cool person. I can with Confidence say that you have made my life 100% better by being In it. I love you, and REFUSE to let you regard yourself as anything but the Royalty You Are. I understand Accepting Compliments Isn't the easiest, but I'll make it my mission to keep reminding you of Who you are, until One day, you Can Look in the mirror and See what I see when I look at you, my Darling <3" You giggle happily, nuzzling into their chest some more as you feel your heart race, and your chest heat up. You Would let them win, for now~

#fuck i want this so bad #sfw tickle community #tickle thoughts

[my-name-is-siduri]

The Pet Shop Boys Video Game

You may know about West End Girls being in GTA V, or the various songs that have been included in karaoke and rhythm games. But that's just tracks included in the game, not an entire game with the central focus of the Pet Shop Boys. Surely nothing like that exists...right?

Our story begins on a late Saturday night, in a Discord voice call. @condylicious, knowing my obsession with PSB, had jokingly searched for "Pet Shop Boys video game" on Youtube.

What we found was an enigma that plagued our lives for the rest of the night. So now I present it to you, dear reader, in hopes that this curiosity is documented for posterity.

This is PSB Game (1992) for the Commodore 64.

(Full essay below.)

Part 1: Gameplay

Lucky for all of us, not only is the PSB Game available online, but it's playable right out of Archive.org! I recommend adjusting the emulator's joystick settings so that the controls work properly.

Intro

Upon loading up the ROM, the first screen we're presented with has an animated color border, the name Riff Raffs, the label Pet Shop Boys +6, and a scrolling message in the middle.

Quick tangent: this first screen that we've been presented with is a crack intro. To quickly summarize, breaking and removing a software's copy protection oddly enough has a culture around it, complete with entire teams that work on cracking programs. Not only do they remove the copy protection, but they add their own little flourish at the intro. The Riff Raffs here are one such team.

The second screen is a cheat menu, also added in by the crack team. For my playthrough I gave myself infinite lives because I'm bad at video games.

Title Screen

With all of that out of the way, it's time to start the game!

Other than the big text declaring PSB Game, there's the credit of 1992 S Pearson (we'll come back to this later), and an indication that Neil is Port 1 and Chris is Port 2. The title screen also has an extremely loud clashing noise playing over it. Listening closely though, it's a few second loop of the beginning of Opportunities (Let's Make Lots of Money).

I'm gonna be honest, these visuals combined with the clanging bitcrushed audio is uncannily similar to the supposed Polybius title screen. If the Men in Black show up at my door five days from now and start asking me synth-pop related questions then this is why.

The Stages

Pressing fire on the title screen starts the game. Whichever port you used to start will be the port you can play on. You can press fire on the other port at any time to have a second player join in.

Neil and Chris can move left and right. The fire button shoots up a comically large bullet upwards.

Getting hit knocks off one block from the health meter, as well as make our heroes flail their arms in distress. If the health meter drops to zero, its game over for that player. If both players lose, the game boots you back to the title screen. But I gave myself infinite health earlier so I won't have to worry about that during this playthrough :)

There are twelve stages. Most of the stages take place on this Launderette screen:

On these Launderette stages, large gray rectangles attempt to squish our heroes. They are also impossible to shoot, leaving you with no choice to dodge them. After two stages of the Launderette screen, the game changes the stage to a different screen with different enemies. It switches back to the Launderette screen for another two stages, then to a new screen, and so on until the game ends. Here are all the unique stages.

Stage 3:

It's the sleeve for the Love Comes Quickly single! Being rendered so minimalistic has somehow made Chris more ominous than he already was.

Stage 6:

A bald, sunglasses-wearing man with a shirt that says "Video Fall". I'm not sure who this character is supposed to be, but he's throwing VHSs at us. Luckily these VHSs can be destroyed with a couple of shots, one of the few things that you can actually shoot.

Stage 9:

The word UNFAIR is turned to its side, while a strange creature attacks our heroes. This stage isn't any more unfair than the other stages though, so I'm not sure what that's about.

Stage 12:

I have no idea what this is supposed to be a picture of. It's possible that since Stage 3 was a picture of Chris that this might be a picture of Neil. But it's so mangled by pixelization that it's anyone's guess really.

Ending

The game ends rather unceremoniously after Stage 12. It rapidly flickers the words "THE END". After flashing it for a little while, the game loops back to Stage 1.

Truly, the best that gaming has to offer.

Part 2: Who is responsible for this

As I mentioned in the intro, the first part of this journey began with a youtube video of PSB Game's gameplay. IMO it's not as good as mine, but it did start me off on this entire journey, to which I must thank it.

After going through every stage of grief upon watching this video, I began searching for more information about this game. I found two Commodore 64 databases had entries for the game. Here is the Gamebase64 entry, and here is the CSDb entry.

What's the title of the game anyway?

You might have noticed that the game appears to go by several names. CSDb, the original youtube video we found, and the cracking team itself calls the game "Pet Shop Boys +6". But the Gamebase64 entry calls it "PSB Game - Pet Shop Boys", and the game's title screen simply calls it "PSB Game." To confuse this further, the Archive.org file has "+6" tacked on at the end of the file name. My best guess is that the +6 part is related to the cracker team themselves? If anyone knows Commodore 64 terminology can explain this, feel free to let me know. Update: I've learned that the "+6" attached to the title refers to the 6 cheats available to use on the cheat menu before the game loads. Here is a video that explains the concept in more detail. Thank you to @dinosaurkirbys for letting me know about this, I appreciate it!

Personally, I've decided to go with the name PSB Game since it appears on the title screen.

Back to figuring out who made this

I realize it's a little bit late in this essay to point out that this game is a fan creation and completely unofficial. But uh, I thought I'd bring it up just in case.

The CSDb entry has little else other than the download link and credits the cracking team Riff Raffs (more about this in a bit) but has no credits for the game itself. The Gamebase64 entry gives us a little more information, noting the year it was published, as well as two names: Shaun Pearson. and Chris Yates.

Chris Yates is a red herring. As seen in the publishing info, PSB Game was created with SEUCK, which is an application that can be used to create shoot 'em up games. Chris Yates is one of the programmers for that application. Essentially, it's like if you credited a game made with RPG Maker as being created by RPG Maker itself.

That leaves us with Shaun Pearson.

Gamebase64 lets you search by creator. Searching for the name Shaun Pearson brings up a few results, mainly other SEUCK projects. What caught my attention was that they appear to have worked on a game as recently as 2020.

Now where this gets particularly interesting is that searching the same game on CSDb credits to user Wile Coyote instead. I'm not entirely certain if Wile Coyote is Shaun Pearson, but if they are, then they're active to this day. I'm not sure how to get into contact with them to confirm this because CSDb's forums were too confusing for me (I'm bad at technology I know), but if they are in fact the same, I think it's pretty cool to know that they're still active. If anyone can find me a way to contact them (or hey, if Shaun/Wile Coyote is currently reading this and want to contact me), feel free to reach out!

Part 3: Conclusion

As is, I think that's all there is that can be documented about the PSB Game. Before I go though, I do have a few requests.

One, if there is a physical copy of PSB Game laying around somewhere (unlikely, but you never know), I'd like to see a picture of it.

Two, if anyone knows how to rip C64 sprites, I'd love to have the sprite sheet for this game. Especially tiny pixel Chris and Neil flailing their arms.

And finally, Shaun, if you're reading this, I'd just like to say thank you so much for creating this strange little game. I had a blast uncovering it and learning a bunch about the C64 in the process. As I said, if you're willing to reach out, I'd love to hear more about this game from you!

Thanks for reading, everyone!

tl;dr weird little C64 shoot 'em up starring Neil and Chris

#PSB Game #Pet Shop Boys #Commodore 64 #obscure media #essay #Sid does writing #Sid posts

[that-girl-lyra]

My Fitness Favourites (2024 Master Post)

This is sort of like my own master post and or an update upon my previous one on Reddit, but please remember that like all things, not everything will work for everyone. I am not a doctor or certified PT (yet!). I'm just a girl who wanted to lose weight and found a passion for all things gym and fitness related :)  With that being said, I hope that you guys find the tools that I used helpful to you, and I can not wait to see your progress <3 

Apps 

Here are some of the apps that I used and still use to this day to help track my fitness progress. I’ve gone through a bunch of different fitness apps and these are by far my favorites. 

FitNotes 

This app is super straightforward. I use it each time I go to the gym or do a home workout to track the number of sets, reps, and weights. There are no ads and it's completely free. You can also add in your own workouts and machines if you can't find what you’re doing in their list. 10 out of 10, highly recommend!

FitBod 

I no longer use this app HOWEVER, if you’re just starting out I think this app would be a good place to get started. It lays out a workout plan for you based on what your goals are, and it even shows you HOW to do each workout if you’re unsure of the movements and form. I found it super helpful when I started out and I hope you do too! I will say, the free version does give you a lot, however it does have a paid plan to which I am unfamiliar. 

Tabata Timer 

Personally, nowadays I only use this app occasionally but if you’re not a fan of counting reps, this may be a better alternative. You can create workouts and customized times for sets, breaks, rests, etc. I like to use this for my kettlebells and mace work at home, but you can use it however you wish! Bonus points because it's also 100% free. We love free shit here lol. 

MyNetDiary 

Similar to MyFitnessPal, this is an app that tracks your calorie input and output. I prefer it’s interface over MyFitnessPal personally, and this is the app I used to lose 40+lbs in 2022. Along with a food scale, this is a very useful tool, and I still use it when I go into a cut. The free plan is great and it doesn't force you into a paid one. You have the option to upgrade, but its not necessary unless you really really really wanna see all of your macros besides calories, sodium, protein and carbs. 

Alarmy 

Sleep is probably one of the most important things for your overall mental and physical health. I used to suck at waking up early but I really really wanted to become an early bird and track my sleep. I found Alarmy and I haven’t looked back. In the free version, you can be awoken with annoying sounds and tasks to turn off your alarm, as well as track your sleep and sleep quality.  

Websites 

TDEE Calculator 

As I said in my previous master post, a good place to start is to find out what your TDEE is (total daily energy expenditure). Basically, how many calories you burn just by being alive. You can go from there to find out how many calories you should eat depending on if you're trying to lose/gain weight, as well as protein intake on top of your desired fitness level. A very handy tool. Just plug in your current height, weight, age, and fitness level and you’ll be good to go! 

Equipment / Tools 

Xiaomi MiFit Band  

Ima be honest, I really hated the samsung fitness watches. I went through 2 of them due to battery issues and I never even physically damaged them. I got the Xiaomi MiFit band because I was sick of paying so much money on fitness watches and this thing has the durability of a Nintendo 64 I swear. I only charge the sucker like, maybe once a week, and it gives a pretty accurate read of how many calories I burn during walking, workouts, etc. Also, the thing was like $40 or something. Ive had it over a year and the only thing I’ve had to replace was the strap (a pack of two was like $6). The strap was also my fault for breaking it lol. 

Renpho Scale 

Sort of a tool/app combo. The scale is around $20 on amazon and it tracks your weight (duh) as well as body composition to a fairly accurate degree. The gym I currently go to has a body composition machine and I’ve done a DexaScan in the past and the information between all of them is a close match. The app is free as well and I love it. 

Adjustable Dumbbells 

I love the gym, I do, but my heart will always belong to dumbbells. There is so much you can do with them from arms, legs, core, back,etc. They’re a great piece of kit and I will never stop using them. A set of adjustable dumbbells will put you back a few bucks sure, but imo, it's a worthy investment in the long run. Plus if you’re like me and you have limited space in your home, they’re a great choice. 

Supplements 

I wanna reiterate the fact that I am NOT a doctor lol but I'm sure everyone has seen a metric ton of influencers and PT’s recommending this or that supplement. Truly, I don’t take many and the only one I can recommend personally is Creatine. Just remember to drink water with it and you’re golden. Some people get a mildly upset stomach on it but again, that all depends on the person. I’ve personally never gotten an upset stomach with it and I take/have taken 2 types of Creatine (Monohydrate and Alkaline). 

You’ll hear about a “loading phase” but you don’t have to do that if you don't want to. It's not necessary. 

The only other thing I take is magnesium but that's just to help me not have hypnic jerks when I go to sleep. Literally no other reason lol.   

General Advice/Tips 

If you’re just starting out with your own fitness journey and begin to tell people that you’re working out, eating right, etc, you may experience some negativity from others. Once you say anything like “Im working out/losing weight!” everyone and their mother becomes a health expert. I’ve gotten people telling me to not lift weights because “Its bad for your bones!”, or “Your heart will explode eventually!”. 

These are people who are just jealous and they envy your dedication to yourself. Ignore them. Misery often demands company. 

You may also find lovely little messages in your dm’s from that one girl in high school who was a bully and is now shilling MLM products. Please for the love of all that is good and green on this earth, do not interact! They will send you really crappy copy and paste messages saying that they can help you on your journey with “insert snake oil product here”. 

There is no magic pill, drink, juice, cleanse, detox, whatever the hell that will do the work for you. Pyramid Schemes that are the most common for this are ItWorks, JuicePlus, Herbalife, and BeachBody. Idk if Plexus is still around but still. If you’re ever unsure about anything, I would pay a visit to r/antiMLM for more info. 

Diets, diets, diets are all the rage (as they are always). Guru’s telling their followers to eat only animal based because “its how our ancestors ate!” or “do x to lower your cortisol levels”, and “STAY AWAY FROM BREAD AND SEED OILS!”. Block, ignore, and unfollow. 

I don’t know about you, but I absolutely fucking love bread and cheese and will turn any Olive Garden within a 20 mile radius of me into my bitch with unlimited breadsticks and pasta. 

Yes, we all know certain food is healthier than others, but at the end of the day as long as you are watching what you eat, and getting your workouts in, it doesn't matter. If you want a burger then eat the burger. 

In Conclusion 

I could go on and on forever about anything and everything fitness related. Book recommendations, creators to follow/unfollow, routines…I love it all, I truly do. And one day I hope to become a certified PT myself, but until that day comes, I simply am not. I'm just a girl who got fit, and want to see others achieve their goals as well. I know how hard and awful the process can be, but I guarantee you that every step you take up that mountain is worth every second of the view at the top. 

Movement is improvement, and as long as you keep moving, you’ll keep improving. 

If you’re here reading this, then you’ve already taken step 1 and I couldn't be more proud of you. Its a hard thing to look in the mirror and say to yourself “I need to change ''. Self confrontation is often very difficult and disheartening. But where many have chosen to give up, you chose to step up. And I am so fucking thrilled that you did <3 

If anyone has anything else they’d like to share in the comments about tools and what not that you’ve used, please feel free to post them! This is a safe space for all of us. 

Thank you all for reading and I hope you find what I’ve written to be useful in your fitness journey. Keep up the good work.  

Lyra

#blog #that girl #becoming that girl #fitness #fitblr #gymmotivation #gym aesthetic #girl boss gaslight gatekeep #it girl

[jenkinstheartis]

This Is Why by Paramore

February 10, 2023 / 10 songs, 36 minutes

This album feels like a mix of Paramore’s original sound and their new stuff coming together to create something so new. They take the self reflecting cynicism of After Laughter and their self title album Paramore and mash it with that old alt pop sound that just needed to have a comeback.

Track 1 | This is Why - 6 out of 10

mediocre lyrically, great opening vocally tho.

"Better have conviction, 'Cause we want crimes of passion. Survival of the fittest, You're either with us or you can keep it To yourself (To yourself)"

Track 2 | The News - 7.5 out of 10

love love love its so real, so honest, united and useless

"Every second our collective heart breaks All together every single head shakes"

Track 3 | Running Out of Time - 8 out of 10

realer, got fired for "running out of time" puny, funny, fun, great sing along

"Shoulda, coulda, wouldn't matter, ultimate alibi You know it's a lie. There was a fire (Metaphorically). Be there in five (Hyperbolically)."

Track 4 | C'est Comme Ça - 8.5 out of 10

dont know what that means but i like it! very manic gets my heart racing real? real.

"I hate to admit getting better is boring But the high cost of chaos, who can afford it?"

Track 5 | Big Man, Little Dignity - 9 out of 10

my fave thing: taunting men love the intense sadness with that subtle feeling of defeat beautiful lyrically

"I memorized all your lies. I can't look away, you're like a movie that I love to hate. I fantasize your demise. I should look away because I know you're never gonna change."

Track 6 | You First - 10 out of 10

she opens the song with how living well is a privilege, how can i not lose my mind in pure fucking glee? vocally orgasmic too

"Turns out I'm living in a horror film ,where I'm both the killer and the final girl. So who, who are you?"

Track 7 | Figure 8 - 7.8 out of 10

another vocal and musical masterpiece, that's it from me tho

"I was only being kind but you mistook me for weak"

Track 8 | Liar - 7.9 out of 10

not a fan of explicit love songs (im the shit she running from but I DON'T CARE im different) but her voice is so pretty and that oh my love shit is gas

Track 9 | Crave - 8 out of 10

do not crave to do anything (except for like everything) again!! >:( please miss hayley go easy on me!!! that line is my everything

"Look up and see a reflection of someone who never gave way to the pain What if I told 'em, now that I'm older, there isn't a moment that I'd wanna change"

Track 10 | Thick Skull - 9 out of 10

grungy, angy, revengey, sadistically. tells a pretty grime story in a song sort of way; you get what that means trust me.

"Hit over the head Epiphany Over my head Repeatedly Thick skull never did Nothing for me"

fin.

#music #lyrics #paramore #this is why #music review #album review #music blog #alternative #alt pop #alt rock #pop punk

[captain-krow-drozdov]

So, since you've been enjoying the newest version of TMNT, I have to ask:

1) Have you seen the older Turtles Forever movie, a Turtles version of spiderverse.

2) Did you know there was a live action show of TMNT and they had a 2 episode crossover on an older Power Rangers show.

3) Also on that live action show they introduced a controversial female turtle. Which reminds me, I saw on YouTube that in a recent run of TMNT comics they brought back the 5th turtle as a possible clone/Frankenstein creation and in this comic, one of the Turtles loses their shell and had to get it replaced.

4) A thought that crossed my mind, how do you think the Turtles & April from "Rise" would react to a female turtle popping up?

Ooo~ Mkay So I'm A Hella Newbie To The Turtle Brain Rot So Forgive Me/Have Mercy On Any Lacking Knowledge

Answer 1: No But I Caught A Few Out Of Context Clips Of Previous Cartoon Iterations And Mortal Kombat Cutscenes (Mainly 2012 And 2003) Via Both YouTube And My Uncle Being The OG Turtles Fan In My Family. I Also Watched The First Bay-verse Film Cause I Was Into The Transformers Movies At The Time And Was Curious.

Answer 2: No I Didn't But Honestly It Tracks Considering All The Things TMNT Has Officially Crossed Over With (Wonder If I Can Find Any Clips Of That It Sounds Chaotic)

Answer 3: Every Time I Learn Something New About The Comics I Get A Little More Confused, Not In A Bad Way, But Like In A "Do I Have The Funds And Bookshelf Space To Support A New Comic Book Obsession?" Kinda Way

Answer 4: As For How The Rise Bois And April Would React To A New Chica Turtle Really Depends Considering The Whole ✨Hidden City✨ Situation Ya Know?

Option A: She's A Turtle Yokai And She Could Be Chill Or She Could Be Workin With Big Mama Who Knows Endless Possibilities!

If She's On Chill Terms With The Bois (And Let's Say She's Got The Badass Ninja Mojo Too) I Feel Like Her And The Hamato Siblings Would Have A "Friends That's Slowly Turning Into Cool/Weird Cousins Status" Type Relationship. Cause I Can't Really See Any Of The Bois Going The Romantic Route, Puppy Love? Maybe But I Don't See It Going Anywhere (But I'm Also Bad At Writing Romance Stuffs So... *Shrugs*)

Now If She's Working With Big Mama On The Other Hand... Leo Immediately Gives Her Draxum Treatment, No Doubt. Donnie Will Prolly Follow Leo On This One And April Will Usually Join The Twins On Stuff Like This, She's Keeping An Open Mind But Thin Ice Man Thin Ice. Dr. Feelings Senses A Possibly Redeemable Person And immediately Becomes Her Worst Nightmare, No One Escapes The Doctor... Raph Is On The Fence About Her But Family Comes First, So First Sign His Family Will Be Hurt By Her And He's Throwing Hands.

Option B: She's A Turtle Mutant! Which Is Fun Because It Can Also Go Many Ways! Was She Human First Or Turtle First? Is She A Hamato (Turtle Mutated By Splinters/Any Other Hamato Members DNA)? Was She Just A Turtle That Ate An Ooze-Squito? A Human With A Pet Turtle/Works With Turtles And Got Biten By An Ooze-Squito? Did Donnie Fuck Around And Find Out Via Cloning??? Who Knows! Either Way My Brain Says Chaos And Feels! + If She Was A Turtle First Then The Bois Get A Mutant Person Who Understands What It Was Like To Not Originally Be Human, Which Can Go All Sorts Of Angsty Ways.

Oh Dear This Has Gotten Long... Welp This Prolly Isn't Exactly What Ya Wanted On The Whole Reaction To A Female Turtle Mutant Front, Cause I'll Be Honest I'm Not Great With Keeping Characters In Character So It Turned Into A Bit Of A Rambling Fic Prompt Instead... My Bad.

#the avian answers #rottmnt #TMNT #fic prompt #i guess???? #bruh its 4 am.... i gotta do shit today so i guess imma sleep now offt- #sleep deprived ramblings #captain is rambling again

[spicycoffeebean]

If you don't want to answer that's COMPLETELY fine and you can ignore this entirely, but if your comfort zone permits: I happened across your tag and am. curious how someone could use reddit to try and get someone to detransition. Like, do you mean she made a post about it to get people agreeing with her or??

Hi Anon! I'll be honest and say I'm glad somebody took notice enough to actually ask. Because I still refuse to believe it happened.

No! She did not make a Reddit post. She just sent me several posts from r/detrans to get me to detransition.

More below the cut! Idk how long this will be, but cw for transphobia and all around shitty/questionable behavior

For those who don't know (I can't track down the post, but I commented in tags) my own mother (60) has been very actively against my transition (ftm) since I began taking testosterone in November 2021(I have been openly trans and using he/him prns since 2018, so it's not like any of this was "new" information to her) On top of blatant misinformation, my mom tried to source REDDIT, the detransitioner's subreddit to prove that yes, people do detransition. Never once denied her that. My issue here is that no, she did not make a post, she was ~browsing~ the detransitioner subreddit r/detrans to push me to detransition. She was "sourcing" it (I wanna say she said in the same conversation that she doesn't trust sites that have LGBTQ+ flags despite the statistics being very real and very present. I'm an analytics/statistics student.)

I have a million issues with this, but very simply, she is using people's struggles and real trauma to fuel a transphobic agenda to get me to detransition (I was so much happier when I chose to be openly trans let alone when I actually started T last year.) If you actually read the subreddit, 99% of those stories are OP saying "Transitioning did not work for me" but not once do they denounce transitioning. They make it clear that their experiences with it did not work out.

“I talk to detransitioners all of the time” she said “Why don’t you talk to a real trans person?” I asked her “Because I know their story.” is what she said word for word Bitch I’m trans and I don’t know trans people’s stories. I just am trans?? I made it super easy for her. Talk to a doctor or a real trans person. She makes any excuse to NOT DO THIS. A cisgender doctor in California will tell you that you are out right wrong and doing more harm than any good you might see from it.

Less than 1% of people detransition, and the majority of those who detransition ARE STILL UNHAPPY. Even then a handful of people detransition because of society, family, or something simple as healthcare. People are denied healthcare because doctors don't want to provide basic care to a transgender person. (I live in the US where this practice would be illegal) My mother acts like I myself deny that people detransition while she literally won't acknowledge WHY people detransition at all. LGBT clinics are apparently shutting down in the UK, Norway, Sweden etc. Yeah cool cisgender people are losing healthcare too. But apparently that doesn't matter. My brother's(cis) bisexual and he could be denied care if he lived in such a place. I don't think she'd take kindly to that, knowing she was the most supportive when my brother came out well over 10 years ago.

I do not want my story or trauma to be used as fuel for a fire to hurt somebody else. I doubt any of these detransitioners would be happy knowing this either. Their stories are not for my mother to tell

anyway she sends me to college(to study analytics/statistics lol??) and insists I'm brainwashed and need an autism diagnosis(YES, SHE ASKED ME 3 TIMES TO GET ONE. NO I JUST HAVE ADHD. I ASKED DOCTORS FOR 5 YEARS ABT IT LOL)

She's just in denial she spent 1 million usd and 2 years of paperwork on a China doll because "[She] didn't want to try for another son" I was told this my entire childhood and it's haunting me almost every day now.

That's the super dumbed-down version of that Reddit comment. Let alone EVERYTHING ELSE she put me through the last 14 months.

TLDR; She did not make a post to get people to agree with her, she was just taking people's stories and struggles to fuel a hate agenda detransitioners themselves do not agree with (she cannot read.)

#SO YEAH IF YALL WERE WONDERING HOW I WAS DOING LOL #Please feel free to ask more on the matter #I may use all of this to construct an essay explaining to the rest of my family why I'm never going home #ON TOP OF THAT #i asked her 'will you refer to me as a man' #her response was 'no that would be lying' #so if yall wondering why im in a persistently shitty mood its bc my family abandoned me #i couldnt go home for christmas for the last two years #i almost spent this last year of christmas by myself. but i was invited by a coworker bc he knew i would be alone #don't mask or change who you are to please a family that wont love who you truly are #there are people out there who love you. #any fellow lgbtq+ followers youre more than welcome to message me if youre struggling #i will be your new dad #dai's mahjong puns #text #asks #long post / #transphobia #ask to tag #literally none of it felt real #i love my mom. i do. she's not a 'bad' person. shes just FUCKING STUPID #anonymous #anon

[wack-ashimself]

 Our justice system is FUCKED. First time I had to go in for jury duty in....15 years?

First time I had to go in for jury duty in....15 years? They asked WAY WAY more questions of the jury (one of the NEWEST ones: do you watch justice/cop dramas/shows/movies, and believe them to be accurate? I KNOW that was not asked of us 15 years ago). To the point I heard about a murdering child, sexual abuse on KIDS, and that was just the JURY. They asked very detailed private questions and potential jurors had to answer in front of a room full of strangers. And the topic at hand was not a criminal case, but a FUCKED up topic regardless TWO YEARS after the accused thing happened. It took THAT fucking long to hear something involving kids?

Not to mention, it disgusted me how 'buddy buddy' the judge, the typer person, the prosecutor, and the 3rd party unbiased guy who decided the outcome to a degree all were. Add in the cops as witnesses later on, and this is already a stacked case. There were multiple laughs over these serious questions. Like, if I did not KNOW they all were working together, I could fucking see it plain as day. It also threw me off how everyone was...charismatic. Even talking about shitty things, having a few laughs, they still charmed the jurors. Most there liked both the prosecutor AND defense attorneys. It's an aspect I kinda ignored: CHARMING the jurors. Not winning thru truth, but making them feel...validated. And EVERYONE shared some mundane unimportant side story of how they knew someone, directly or indirectly.

And they can cut out jurors on a WHIM? How is that a 'jury of your peers' if it is highly fucking filtered from both sides? The thing that drove me the most insane besides the word 'honorable' actually being next to the judge's name (seriously, you EARN that title by doing your job right, not by fucking default. Let's see your track record, and see how honorable it is)?

They SPECIFICALLY ALL said many many times 'Do you agree to follow the law as the JUDGE defines it to be?'

I DO NOT KNOW HER DEFINITION. Let's hear it....

Ugh.

I got out of it, at least for the day. How? I rambled my fucking truth. I was kinda everywhere, but I said:

'Largest prison population in the world. We are not the good guys.'

'With epstein's island, I believe anybody can get away with anything if it wasn't recorded.'

'I have friends lose kids to our system. And it broke my friend. He didn't deserve that.'

I actually said, and it was the god's honest truth: I am biased both ways. I have seen the system do bad, but, I, by default, would trust a kid's allegations over an adult's denial on average (I didn't sound THIS smart when I said it so paraphrasing).

Pay is shit, treat you like you owe them, it's hardly justice when 2/3 are plea deals. I learned a lot, but none of it good.

<worst part is everyone working SEEMS like good people, but they're endorsing a known corrupt flawed system, so even tho they were civil, they're destroying society, just politely.>

Fav part? The 2 times I was called, I said outloud 'god damn it', made people laugh both times, and when I was excused, I said 'thank god' and made even more laugh. NO ONE WANTED TO BE THERE.

ps-EVERYONE in that room has a DECENT chair, EXCEPT for the vast majority of jurors who were being waited on in the back. It was like an old hard church pew. TERRIBLE. Judge: you're semi rich. I'm being paid $15. Give me your chair. Fairly, she did say sorry for them. But...not like she's gonna petition to change it. It's to say something to look good, not actually do something about it. Politics: words, not actions.

#jury #jury duty #juror #justice #court #judge

[explosionshark]

For the music ask game: Souvlaki by Slowdive?

ah. this classic. a blueprint record. literally and quite deservedly considered one of the finest shoegaze records of the 90s. it rules, basically.

Opinion on cover design: i mean, it's a pretty bog standard band photo album cover, if we're being honest. iconic only because you see it and you think "oh fuck yeah, souvlaki" not like offensively bad or anything. i would hang this on my wall.

Favourite song: auhhhh this is so hard to pick. "when the sun hits" i guess, if you really twist my arm.

it just sounds huge - it's got the beautiful, spacy dreamy guitars and the ethereal vocals, those wall of sound moments for punctuation, and the parts where the layered like idk gang vocals hit? fucking gorgeous. and the lyrics! "Sweet thing, I watch you / You burn so fast it scares me / Mind games don't lose me / I've come so far, don't lose me / It matters where you are" like oh my god

Least favourite song: i guess like "here she comes?" it's fine, for what it is, but it's the shortest and least substantive track on a really tight record. i don't dislike it, but i'm never like "oh dude i NEED to go listen to 'here she comes' off the hit 1993 shoegaze record souvlaki"

Underrated track: idk. are any of these tracks considered underrated when all the people who care about this band and this genre consider this record a masterpiece?

Overrated track: pass pass pass

Rate: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 

big music ask game

#i need a music tag i don't hate #slowdive

[feuqueerfire]

The Sign Live Blogging

I was supposed to watch Only Friends after Pit Babe but then took over a week off of watching new shows because I had to write a Pete/Kenta fic and now instead of Only Friends, I'm watching The Sign.

I know incredibly little about this show except it involves Billy and a guy I don't know, there's monsters? sci-fi/fantasy elements? cops? I watched like a few tiktoks/gifsets from eps 1 and 2 but those didn't give away much. Also, there was angsty stuff going on in this show during that week when Pit Babe ep 10? aired and [redacted] [redacted] and Last Twilight was getting a lot of flack for ep 12 but I can't remember if it was because somebody died or not

Anyway, here we go, hope to love it, as always.

Ep 1 (Feb 20)

1-1

Ah, I for a split second wondered if that person was gonna betray them... but was like nah, this is just the beginning and we don't know anything, would they would that rn? maybe that look was meant to signify that he's gonna get himself killed by being stupid? but ig they would make him betray them (though was that a real hostage or also a dummy?)

ohhh we got powers here too? Jeff in Pit Babe needed to touch someone to see their future but ig it's just visions at random times here?

I wish the first 10 minute fight sequence was shorter because we knew nothing but the last 3-4 minutes was interesting because we see more of the characters at play beyond just fighting

1-2

Ah, it was a little educational test. I knew it was about cop training, so I guess this makes sense

Were the censored butts necessary lol

ohhh people don't believe Tharn can see the future and would make fun of him

Ohh Tharn's visions often include Phaya

Also at first I didn't get what iron rod they were talking about but I rewatched and seems like there are iron rods protruding from the poles

Man, Chart's gonna be like Winner (Pit Babe) isn't he? But maybe more skilled and so less pathetic but more dangerous? Equally annoying maybe?

Does Tharn like Phaya already?

Are the guys who keep calling each other Baby dating for real or is this a joke? So many dudes, can't keep track of who is who

omg are Tharn and Phaya becoming friends aw

I just realized from the comments Chart is Kawnah (from KawnahTurbo and TharnType's Lhong)

1-3

"a sign in your vision but couldn't stop it" oh is that why this is called The Sign

Oh Chart is gonna already? delightful

oh wtf, a sea monster?

woah gorgeous gorgeous beautiful sea monster for real, I was not expecting it to look so beautiful instead of kinda janky CGI

not the ethereal being reaching her hand out to rescue Phaya and that hand becoming Tharn's pulling him up

What's the thing Tharn always wanting to do

dang, that girl is Tharn? but like magical? his magical projection when he couldn't physically go to help Phaya?

not past life soulmates

Chart haunting this story by being annoying even after he's left goddamn

Shoulda dropped some money for the auntie before leaving for making a mess of her restaurant

Phi Yai so funny watching Tharn and Phaya run away hand in hand talking about feeling like his nong is about to fall in love

I'll be honest if i was a gay dude and my crush drew a girl who looked like me and had my name but again was a girl, I'd lose my shit

1-4

Why is P'Yai obsessed with Tharn and Phaya, it's so embarrassing for them >.<

ouuu not this random kiss

damn a Lieutenant died and was found in the water

Is the Lieutenant dead fr or no cuz why'd the other instructor kinda give Phaya the go-ahead to do some investigating on his own

man, Phaya and Tharn are so cute! At first during the 5 day training I'd thought they weren't friends but then became friends throughout it but obviously not

oh lol so the guys actually have something going on on-and-off

pls not Yai airing out everything about his bro including his single and virgin status

this bathroom scene why?? i'm so embarrassed but also shy

A tree? monster??

wtf how can you even drink to "Do you like someone at this table?" Like the answer is then obviously yes and the answers aren't very broad lol considering there are only 4 people and one of them is your brother. and there's also the guy that everybody is teasing you and him about

What a good first episode! I'm very intrigued both in terms of the romance (it's so cute idk like why do they interact in a way that makes me kinda shy) and the fantasy elements + mystery elements. The straight-up fighting elements are alright but I could do with less. Also, tragic that we're getting copaganda but oh well

Also, Pit Babe and The Sign started in November while Dead Friend Forever started in December. The people who watch these BLs weekly must've been having a ball with so many shows exploring new genres and high-concepts in BL. Also interestingly, both Pit Babe have Pavel and Billy who each have been in BLs before and lead them as one of the main pairs while their partners Pooh and Babe are new to the industry. Ta and the other guys apply a little less since Ta only had small roles before and Dead Friend Forever seems more ensemble cast but kinda similar ig

Ep 2 (Feb 20)

As expected, I have a hard time stopping watching a show when I start even though I have work to do.

Also, while looking for ep 1 gifs, I came across some stuff about the naga (snake) and eagle but I didn't read much into the post but I guess those creatures will feature prominently throughout the show

2-1

aghh I'd seen this hiding under blanket scene in a gif or tiktok or something before it's so aksldfj cute [or was it a kinda different scene? cuz feels like they were more giggly hmm]

Ah, Tharn wants to joing the Special Investigation Unit to investigate his dad's death (and Yai isn't related to him by blood)

Is Captain Akk with them? For now, I'm guessing he also wants answers and that's why he's wanting more evidence + telling Phaya to get evidence + not stopping the little group from investigating

2-2

But now he does seem kinda suspicious...

omg a siren call type thing?

hmm Phaya says that Tharn looks like the girl in his dream... was he sleepwalking when he started following the magical girl?

Oof they got caught but okay again, it seems like indeed the captains are also investigating the cause of death and are not against our main characters

2-3

gorgeous shot

ah, past lives talk again

now we have some real cops on our hands oof

oh wait hah they were taking 5 special investigation students and it just happens to be our 5 characters lol

so cute they're so cute omg

also glad that

I gasped out loud, whoever Tharn loves will die? omg, this show has Everything fr

2-4

ahhh no, that's probably not Phaya's gf, don't mourn, Tharn <- I say as somebody who is mourning

ack, Phaya is no annoying with intercepting the drink from Oat (random guy buying Tharn a drink) agh you're jealous, do you know that?

Wish the lyrics were translated

lol their Spin the Bottle never ends

The drinking obviously means the answer is yes, wtf don't be silly guys

Would Phaya have fr chosen Tharn? ah the questions

AND OF COURSE THEY'RE LONG LOST CHILDHOOD FRIENDS why would they not be? I'd thought they'd mention that Phaya also lives at the same province as Tharn and Yai when it was mentioned earlier in 2-3 (Nong Khai?) but then they didn't but I guess they indeed met each other at kids at that province

Yai in his drunken state still making Phaya give Tharn a piggyback ride and take him to his condo

Ah, this is what the "Billy and Heng playing enemies instead of friends" was about

Didn't mean to watch the Ep 3 teaser but omg Phaya has prophetic dreams or something?

I'm really into like... Billy's physicality? I don't know how to word this, just the way he carries himself, I guess. It's very Boy and I'm envious but it's also attractive

Ep 3 (Feb 21)

Watching this in the dark on my iPad at 2am

3-1

ah how do i feel about a love triangle hmmm like theoretically it could be good idk some passive aggressiveness and jealousy amongst the suitors. also saw something about the lore behind it like heng’s character is the naga who has loved Than forever vs Phaya is some eagle guy who is Tharn’s one true love who is meant to die over and over omg??

15th day of the 11th waxing moon seems an important day, Phaya used to dream of the magical girl only on that day but now he dreams of her more often

3-2

oh lol i straight up thought they were all already in Nongkai cuz that conversation had insinuated they’d all meet at Nongkai for some reason. this makes more sense

oh did Tharn do some people wrong in his past life and they are still after him for vengeance?

lol why is Phaya so surprised about the amulet thing, he had a big hunch from last night

ah, so Tharn has bad karma from his past life and his life is intertwined with Phaya’s who will make him experience bad things but can also free him fr the bad karma

Ah, Tharn gave Phaya the amulet on the night of 15th day of 11th waxing moon and that’s when the dreams used to happen. i guess that’s why Phaya said he needs to go to where the dreams started and came to this temple on this day

the first time the childhood amulet thing came up i was like lol not this childhood friends who forgot each other again trope but this is actually such a good interpretation of it. they met at this festival where Phaya was drowning and Tharn saved him after seeing a vision, similar to how many times Tharn has seen him in a vision + has saved him from drowning whether it be himself or his last girl self. and also the amulet that started Phaya’s dreams

and it’s not like the trope of perfectly fine adult relationship that had random childhood backstory for no reason. this one is that the reason they even have this adult friendship and crush is because they met each other that time and were told they’ll meet again since their lives are intertwined ah Phaya dreamt of the naga often as a child

ah so many things happening. so the naga keeps calling Phaya to the water or is it the girl? and the naga wants to drown him under there but Tharn’s past life girl/Tharn in this life doesn’t allow it?

and these last words are so heavy lol protect each other and undo your bad karmas

3-3

this Naga said No Peace for Phaya

The Naga festival and cave and myths are so cool

3-4

what??? i was like aw at the cheek kiss but then the liplick goodnight kiss happened and i was literally like is this a dream? is it just that Phaya is drunk and so is actually kissing Tharn like he wants to?

On the one hand, who gives a fuck if a serial killer is killing rapists, let it go - so annoying if cops and the justice system can't keep rapists off the streets but can put the people behind killing rapists behind bars agh

On the other hand, killer seems to just be the mastermind and forcing other people to do their dirty work and murder is too big of a thing to force people to do so agh I suppose they should stop them

Also, is this gonna be related to the Lieutenant's death at all or are we forgetting about that one? the methods of killing are different though

Not as many comments, esp in the last 2 parts despite the episode being like over 80 mins or smth cuz I was watching on my iPad and sometimes had my phone with me to write thoughts down and sometimes didn't.

Continues to be intriguing, put out so many different threads and it feels like we got a few answers but so many more questions.

Also, I didn't realize the actress playing Sand is a trans woman but yay, employing trans people let's gooooo and in roles that aren't making a fool of them either!

Ep 4 (Feb 21)

4-1

Noooo okay fuck this killer mastermind I can't believe they made the woman who was sexually assaulted by some dude and then had her case dismissed was forced to kill him under duress

omg the stepson who was raped by his stepfather and was forced to kill him, this killer is literally forcing the victims to kill the perpetrators and it must be so horrifying to kill somebody but, like the woman said, she was glad that he was dead and wouldn't be able to harm anybody

clown mask

ah this investigation itself could be a 12-16 ep procedural kdrama, I wonder how they're gonna deal with this as a side plot in this already high-concept show

Oh yeah, I didn't recognize Surprise (from SCOY) in last ep but he's the IT kid

got food to eat lunch as they're eating dinner but it's so hard to type now

who is this fortune-telling, face-changing, snake-bracelet wearing woman?

4-2

what is going onnnnn

oh kissing??? and caressing

a dream ofc makes sense. since that ep 3 kiss was real i thought may be this was as well

was that tharn in the pic that shattered

lmfao the finger in egg + licking it off + "I like it raw" ??

and then the sausage eating ahh Tharn let Phaya suck your dick, he's going crazy

hehe Phaya caught in his broken bike excuse

Tharn's secretiveness regarding Phaya spending the night makes it seem so much more salacious than it was

oh damn, it was just 3 days ago that Meena was kidnapped and forced to kill that guy?

ah, I don't remember her name but one of the SCOY girls!

fungal spores in their lungs, not gonna lie it reminds me of To Sir With Love mushrooms lol

Ah, I did wonder if somebody in their little quintuple (+ the boss Akk) was gonna betray the team but I suppose one of them could also be behind the mastermind killer

Why'd the criminal lowkey look like Akk?

Anyway, I kinda like that in 1-1 combat, Phaya wins over Tharn but Tharn's always out here saving Phaya because he can see when he's in danger heh

Also funny because the Abbot and the mystery woman was like never let go of Tharn and that Phaya's gonna help Tharn get rid of his bad karma, meanwhile Tharn's protecting Phaya all the time. guess it'll be balanced eventually

Ah, Phaya casually talking about getting stabbed to death and how it'd be solely his fault, nothing to do with Tharn. Meanwhile, Tharn has seen Phaya in near-death experiences like 5 times in his visions and saved him so far but is haunted by the experiences

4-4

Is it Akk and he's covering for himself by saying no fingerprints? Reminds me of Beyond Evil where Park Jeongje's fingerprints appeared in the forensics results but they made it disappear hmmm

pls not Tharn being like k whatever as he's jealous about Phaya and new girl Dao vs Phaya being like lemme Intervene as he's jealous about

Phaya is so annoying omg

Oof, did Tharn tell the doctor guy (man I can't remember Heng's character's name beyond it starting with C and similar to Shortcut) about Phaya's nightmares? Or did Doctor man come to find out about it some other way (since he's also connected to them via lifetimes? Is he sending nightmares and trying to drown Phaya on purpose or anything?)

Ah, so Doctor is decidedly a troublemaker/antagonistic and not accidentally so

omg Phaya is really angry (and violent :/)

AI to construct a face under a mask and hood, be serious girl, this cannot possibly be accurate

Okay, if this last murder is being done by the killer himself to avenge his sister who was raped and committed suicide, I think we should let him play it out. arrest him afterwards lol

I hope they clarify next ep that Tharn didn't tell the doctor about the dreams because he would never do that

Next ep has 5 parts woah and is gonna be like ~80 mins of runtime, these are pretty long episodes but don't feel that long and I don't feel the need to speed it up (except I think I did 1.1x once and also wanted to skip some of the gratuitous butt shots/that dream shower scene lol though I didn't)

I was kinda avoiding watching the dream sex scene (watched it in mini on the corner of my screen lol) and so I didn't have too many thoughts except once Phaya wrapped his palm around Tharn's neck. But going through people's gifsets, I've seen a few mentions of how we know this is a manifestation of Tharn's desires, whether it be the choking kink lol or liking getting pushed around dommed and that it's fun to actually get to see his fantasy like that. honestly a FAVE aspect when I think about it that way like aw his desire to be manhandled

Ep 5 (Feb 21)

I'm hungry and want to get dinner but am afraid that there'll be too much genetelia talk and will lose my appetite... maybe I'll gauge how gross it's gonna be first

Also, accidentally thought Ep 5 aired on Dec 24 and so ended up looking at tumblr posts made on Dec 23 (actual date it came out) and so was spoiled that the forensic guy was scheming with the murderer guy for this serial killing

5-1

oof shoulder check

okay I lied, I got too hungry and got dinner but am now gonna be unable to type for at least part 1 probably cuz food hands

okay I'm done eating and gotta say that hmmm too violent

Phaya is just too physically violent in his anger, especially the fact that he deliberately punched the wall beside Tharn's head and also accidentally backhanded him but didn't apologize. like I know we're meant to catch the range of emotions in his face, including guilt and apology for accidentally hitting but he purposefully doesn't apologize and yeah, nope

oh this fucker, why can't they just use this rapist as bait to catch the killer, why does he need to be protected. innocent man my ass

hm, the smaller black van is gonna get crashed into by a big white truck and the killer is seen with the van... is the rapist guy gonna be in the van when it crashes?

yess tomato tomato!

5-2

Man, they really had to have these killers force other people to do the first 3 murders in order to gain the audience support to stop the killer because like... what even is the reason for stopping them? If the cops and judicial system are gonna be useless, I think the little team should def kill this man as he's the reason their younger sister or gf is dead. should've teamed up to kill those other fuckers too tbh instead of involving the victims

let's kill him quickly (and painfully) before the cops come to stop you!

"I promise you that I will not let you die so easily" I get your need for torture but there are cops hunting you right now so hm

nah, not the amulet!

oh? is this guy naga too? the water magic thing?? also I think I saw a gif of Phaya fighting the killer and he had firey wrapped-up palms?

5-3

omg? Tharn taking the knife for Phaya and then somehow having red magic that defeats the blue man killer?

and he got a trinket? did Tharn get it from inside the killer? Was the killer wearing it?

oh hohoho Phaya saying he'll do everything Tharn says is really doing it for me

"The laws you worship and look up to can never keep those bastards behind bars for long" tell 'em. need these fuckass cops to be brought down a peg and get a sense of reality

rolled my eyes at Phaya's "There's the justice you're looking for. It might show up late but it will always come in the end." you cannot be this naive

that video the sister before she died was so fucked man i'm so sad now

stupid ass pep-talk from Captain Akk or whatever "I don't want a loser on my team" okay kys

enough copaganda, let's go back to the fantasy and romance and stuff because this story arc was so sad

Ah, so the car crash vision hasn't manifested yet

Or is that related to his parents death??

5-4

Ah, wearing the amulet again

pls Phaya prepping to make his moves

plssss both of them in their little fantasies

"I want to do just as you did to me" What? You wanna blow him? I acc have no clue why I'm so on the Phaya giving Tharn a blowjob train

not even little fantasies, incredibly long fantasies for both of them like okay Enough

but so funny like okay at least the first fantasy was Tharn dreaming but then he was getting off on that dream again the next morning in the kitchen while cooking and now here's Phaya with his fantasy while awake and mid-conversation

and also hilarious that Tharn's fantasy was like hand around neck + shower while Phaya's is... Tharn blowing on his wound like 40 times lol

Phaya's foiled plans

Oh, that's the gif I saw. Bandaged hands + black smokey magic from Phaya while grabbing Doctor by the shoulder??

lol Phaya speaking to Doctor as if he has any right to control who hangs around Tharn and to what degree. you forget yourself

"Until your time in done" ???

Ohh Phaya burned? Doctor's shoulder omg

not the sponge bath lmfao

lkasdfj the quick 123

Ah, Phaya being the bolster tonight

Phaya's taking advantage of sleeping Tharn fr but lol sure. I wonder if Tharn's also kinda awake lol

Phaya's dream: Freen magic woman -> Tharn and behind Phaya, very big eagle man (which is supposed to be him I guess?)

What happened this ep? Most of the beginning was focused on catching the killer, then the fantasy & staying over at Tharn's place, then being cute toward grandma. But stuff that happened in the middle: the killer can't remember what happened in the cellar but he def had magic (blue) and so did Tharn (red) - which he used to defeat the killer, Doctor and Phaya face-off where Phaya had black? coloured magic which burned Doctor - I wonder how much doctor knows? about the myth/past life stuff, the temple man (Luangpur?) told Tharn that Doctor and Phaya shouldn't meet. Then finally, the dream where we get Freen magic lady, kinda confirmation that she's indeed Tharn (this life), and also a visual of that tall eagle man. Also, from gifs, I realized that the amulet or whatever Tharn used to defeat the killer was his own, he tore it from his neck

Ep 6 (Feb 22)

6-1

I love the eagle fr I'm obsessed w the beautiful Naga from ep 1 too

ahhh lesbians !!!!!!!!!! hehehehehe

I don't care that much about this side couple and their backstory, let's hurry it up

lmfaooo okay funny but I would've murdered someone if all my papers went into the water like that

SCOY mention

huh?? Tharn dated someone and they died?

5-2

Why did Dao's actor become worse at acting? :( I think the script here is just bad because why would a character just recite these things? and they made her cross some lines with her "advice" about Phaya like you guys may be close but you can't say that you think he should quit his work lol

the triangulations lmfao I'm glad that even though Dao seems to care for Phaya a lot, she doesn't necessarily like him like that?

heh Nee coming to sus out if Phaya and Dao were ever a thing

and Phaya clocking that Nee and Dao are into each other lol

I like their little sibling relationship full of teasing but also Nee trying to guide Phaya into grandma's good graces

Dang, what's this painting the man thought was sold at the gallery about?

Okay, in this universe, it's just like ours where the stories of Naga and Garuda are thought to be myths/legends. I kept getting confused how much regular people believed because everybody seemed to believe whatever the monk said but that involved a lot of fantastical aspects + the Naga festival, so I wasn't sure what people in general believed (not just what Phaya and Tharn who are like reincarnations or smth of magical creatures believe lol)

6-3

pls let Tharn and Phaya have scenes together this section

oh man Phaya’s tendency to just do instead of speak and also drag Tharn around is kinda… agh

dang Doctor straight up said he’d seerate the two of them even if it means Tharn dies

oof punch but can’t quite blame Tharn

6-4

art something or other, who is this suspicious guy?

Was too sleepy to write anything for 6-4 but I have half-baked thoughts about the punch ig. On some YT comments and tiktok comments, I saw people annoyed at Tharn for not believing Phaya and people were calling him too stubborn and naive. I do think he should've taken Phaya's warnings/dreams more seriously cuz like girl, you're always seeing visions of him in danger so it can't be that much of a stretch to think he dreams of you in danger c'mon. But I also think Phaya is kinda too vague and doesn't explain properly like he can't just expect to burst in and physically drag Tharn away from Doctor who he has known for years and years and trusts; in contrast, Phaya and Doctor fought and Phaya even physically pushed him or whatever. So I get Tharn being like wtf... and also Phaya being desperate.

I hope they make up next ep (properly. through conversation and honesty and understanding) so that we can get them together again though bc we barely had them together this ep and unfortunately unlike Pit Babe ep 11 where the other characters were able to carry the ep w/o much Babe or Charlie, I don't care as much about the characters here.

Ep 7 (Feb 22)

7-1

As a mix of Death's Game murder artist + last ep's ending where Tharn saw someone (I'm assuming this guy) in a room maybe killing someone with red everything, I thought this guy (Art?) was gonna kill his (ex?)-lover. I still think that's the case cuz of the ending with all the red paint probably hiding the blood but lol at first, I literally thought the guy was asking to be killed and used to Art's painting lmfao but nah he wasn't that devoted, mans was getting married to someone else anyway

Anyway, cool idea, will be cooler once we realize he killed him

7-2

My biggest rip is that Wi can actually act while Dao's actress cannot, so I wish the actresses were switched or Nee's love interest was Wi

hm, so the VIP is the Minister Montree and we didn't get any visions or anything but Inspector Akk kinda makes me think he's behind Lieutenant Tam's death and I wonder if Tharn thinks he's behind his parents' death or at least the coverup. I also just realized is this the guy they were saying has ties to drug stuff that Lieutenant Tam was investigating and the rapist from last ep is tied with him too but they can't interrogate the rapist about him?

lol they talked about this after I wrote allthat

hmm Art said "That's too evill" before maybe puncturing the guy with a pen... so did that man himself suggest it?

I wish the camerawork focused on the art and dance better since it went on for so long

7-3

"To me, a guy named Kao, is already dead" oh man

Why is Phaya as a guest restraining the woman when there are so many cops who came to volunteer or whatever lmfao

Anyway, I thought they were gonna maybe pretend this was also part of the exhibition before he accidentally cut her (with the same pen that killed Kao? and was maybe gonna stab Montree with?)

Is Doctor doing some sort of dark influence/magic on Art? and the way he's physically touching Art on his thigh and then his chest over his heart and then hugging him... no.

okay atp Tharn Has to be kinda suspicious of Doctor knowing about Phaya's dreams/conditions and why he's using it against Phaya (and publicly too) and idk the way he's undermining Phaya like that... is he trying to make other people think of him as hysterical? As if he'd have an outburst similar to Art? but then Phaya almost becomes violent - strengthening Doctor's position...

ah yes, just casual handing over patient records to the cops <3 esp because Art isn't like... actually in jail or anything, idek what they're holding him based on. just cuz of a public outburst and possibly suspicion of maybe a reason behind Kao being missing? like c'mon cops are so fucking shit

bruh why are these cops just saying anything and everything about the case in front of the doctor? dumbasses

7-4

Tharn can see into a painting like this?

The Art and Kao hallucination (?) is so eerie, everything about this is so eerie, I really like it

omg so Kao was really selling the art and betraying Art

I love love love the spliced scene from that night and the same scene in a white room as Tharn and Phaya watch it (I'm assuming Art is recounting it?)

crazy ass pen to be able to rip somebody's throat open and kill them just like that

Oh, so they don't think Art has something to do with Kao's disappearance... but does that man disappearance of Kao the alive man (maybe he ran away abroad with Montree lol and that's how Montree had known to whisper to Art about it being the pen that hurt Kao) or his dead body?

okay at least the pen didn't kill Kao the way they were insinuating lmao I was like tf kinda pen

7-5

I actually cannot, Phaya and Doctor must be Stopped

oh confession ahhhhhh <333

lmfao I'm watching the shower scene in mini on the side lol too much for me

It Continues like okay Enough i'm like watching in mini with 1 eye only enough enough enough i'm so embarassed/shy I think after barely watching anything for so long and then only recently starting watching shows again that have NC scenes (kinda Law of Attention, Pit Babe, and now this) means that I've lost a lot of the tolerance I've built up against it lmfao

Ep 8 (Feb 22)

5 episodes left and they're each fairly short compared to some other ones (each is less than an hour I think?) so I hope they have proper time to wrap everything up in a satisfying way, esp with all the fantasy going on

8-1

omg? The book flipping to Doctor's face to make it seem like he's watching it all was creepy enough last ep but now he tried to kill Phaya via magic dream?? and only stopped because the monk woke Tharn up

I hope Tharn starts actually thinking about the Doctor critically now

They're so cute, I'm glad we can have cute Phaya and Tharn back for a bit because they were really upset with each other for the past 2 eps (and then resulting sex scene but that's still not cuteness yknow)

8-2

Having Phaya promise to not leave... sad if he does end up getting hurt/leaving/whatever and ironic if it's Tharn instead

Wait I'm so confused? Was the Doctor somehow shrouding Tharn and that's why Phaya couldn't see him?

omg even making Phaya see an illusion of Tharn, then once Phaya gets in the water, taking control of him

8-3

oh we finally get to see the past

Also this other world reminds me of Midnight Museum a bit

hm Tharn plays the past "sister" Wansa? I'd expected Freen... but maybe they don't wanna have to have Billy and Freen in such romantic situations etc

I'm South Asian but not Indian or Hindu, so it's very interesting to see these costumes/myths which are vaguely familiar but I'm not fully aware of because idk much about Hindu concepts beyond like the most well-known gods and festivals

ngl I'm slightly confused still but sure

The amlet is Wansarut's original SOUL? damn girl

ENOUGH of calling Wansarut her nong sao/younger sister. Tharn isn't a girl in this life at least, so say nong if you must why are you saying your sister and Phaya are in love when Tharn's now your brother agh

Bad CGI but I forgive because all the Thai show CGI has looked like this I think?

8-4

Kao died in the waters... I wonder if Doctor had something to do with it with his evil water magic since he knew Art and stuff and used Art as a way to get into the investigation...

oh never mind, killed somewhere else and dumped here

why not at least say Yai follow that man with me!

ohhhh that car crash vision was actually a flashback of him and his parents

ah, the scene with Tharn screaming while holding Phaya's still body

I commented about the gender thing like why are we doing Tharn as a girl bc it was kinda... why are we actually just pretending the character who is seemingly the bottom [I mean they're vers to Me but idk about canon lol] and sexually submissive is the girl fr instead of having an actual woman play Wansarut but then I saw a post that said that actually she takes on a female form under water but took on a male form above ground and yay gender fuckery and i'm like okay nice sure, I love gender fuckery.

I wish we got... slightly more time and a more coherent story that Showed the past life story better. I think this show is good with broad themes and parallels and characterization but kinda struggles sometimes with specific moments/scenes, which can make it kinda confusing or unsatisfying - this scene of the past life kinda feels like that to me.

Ep 9 (Feb 23)

9-1

yep Tharn is def gonna be like fuckkk ppl whom I love with die because I love them (and i mean in this case Doctor is making that true) and probably gonna withdraw and breakup after Phaya wakes up

since that Eye Contact moment with Montree’s bodyguard in ep 7? or whatever art gallery, it’s been clear this guy is suspicious and behind some stuff

Montree got Tharn parents killed and wants to kill him now

9-2

Okay so at least Inspector Akk seems to be on the hood side and also knows way more about the case like Korn (the bodyguard?) was behind this

who is Akk talking to?

The disparity between Ning and Dao’s actinng skills is just too much, why didn’t they make Dao be played by Wi the art gallery woman or Marys the forensic officer who are both better at acting ahhh

9-3

huh? why doesn’t Phaya have the Naga amulet? it came off in the water or something?

this is just silly what is even happening

wtf Chart? is that even a fr tattoo? Montree got someone else to get the tattoo/join the gang to throw ppl off his own trail or what

9-4

hopefully a real break from the cop stuff even though ig Tharn’s gonna investigate on his own

I wish Phaya would explain more to Tharn rather than being so cryptic

plssss man snuck out of her hospital to not only meet his past life love but also to have sex despite nearly dying for a few days

aw I wish this NC scene was longer, I’m kinda better at hanging these soft and loving sex scenes more than the crazy shot Horny desperate ones I think?

Also, Phaya kissing down from Tharn's chest and staying kinda on stomach in a similar fashion to how Tharn did it to Phaya during the shower sex scene... I'm gonna take it to allude to Phaya finally sucking Tharn's dick, I've waited for this moment for multiple episodes

Ep 10 (Feb 23)

10-1

Okay, discussion, good! And Phaya didn't tell Tharn about the Doctor but that's because the Abbott told him not to, so it's okay IMO

And it's a cute scene with the cuddling and just so domestic with how casual it is

Phaya was so desperate to make sure Tharn was okay (and also thirsty for that dick...) that he forgot to bring his phone or inform his grandmother and sister like omg

10-2

Phaya is so cute puppy as he's apologizing

Yai shut uppppp the music and vibes makes it seem like Grandma's gonna be okay but what if she wasn't and you outed them D:

pls the Grandma being like "Give me a second" before asking Phaya what the important thing he wants to say is aklsdfj so funny

Awww so supportive and cute T-T

Khem suspecting Inspector Akk of being in cahoots with Montree

SCOY and Gap mention

10-3

dang, is someone in the unit gonna betray them again? We already had Wit or whoever

ah, Tharn overhearing Phaya and the abbott about Doctor... Can I hope he won't do anything stupid lol

lmfao the grandmas complaining, so true

Tharn wants to quit his job after solving his father's case and just stay with his grandma? girl I wish I was rich omg

10-4

agh, Korn and Khom are same person then right? Cuz they're not consistent in naming

oof, Ning dead

lmfao I saw a post w the pic of the "A tiger-man is not real" line by Phaya with caption whatever you say bird-man like so true

everything converging in Nongkai i suppose

Ep 11 (Feb 23)

One episode until hopefully tomorrow morning it's ep 12? Cuz then it's perfect timing. Otherwise, it'll suck lol

11-1

Is the tiger-man and the person died related to this Montree drug ring

Is the instructor knowing about the visions gonna backfire or anything?

So many times people just overhear things lol like Ep 4 Phaya overhearing Tharn and Yai talking about the visions, Ep 10 Tharn hearing Phaya and Abbott talking about Doctor and stuff, and now Khem overhearing Phaya and Tharn discuss his footprints lol

No I get Tharn cuz it's like why does my lover claim to be so jealous of this guy who I've known for years and trust? To Tharn, it feels like Phaya doesn't trust Tharn

oh oops, he doesn't believe Phaya even he's told directly anyway, which I feel like is theoretically understandable like wtf are you even saying Phaya but if you believe the rest of it with past lives and naga and garud, then this is like yeah sure i suppose that makes sense lol + I thought he overheard Phaya and Abbott but no I guess??

ooh cool shot about the grandma to the flashback

omg ?? Doctor in child Tharn's room talking about how they'll be together when the times comes um ??

10-2

Oh, I just realized that the man who Inspector Akk was speaking with was actually probably Chart. like he's there to infiltrate and give info to Akk (and that's also why he hasn't resigned as a cop maybe)

sorry everytime Phaya's exasperated about the Tiger Man, I want him to be more real. like girl you believe you are a Garud reincarnated who is in love with Naga princess reincarnation and have been lovers in the past lifetime(s) and also that a current Doctor is actually a Naga like right now in his own current lifetime. your boyfriend has visions and you have dreams.

10-4

Dang, the cliff falling and surviving should’ve been more exciting I feel like? kinda feels like History 3: Trapped when Tang Yi and Shaofei got out of the forest out of screen lol

ah im really into the last scene bc it’s once again giving vers switch framing with the way that Tharn’s palm is not Phaya’s neck this time + That is sitting slightly taller than Phaya who has to look up at him

I feel like even with a 15 min longer ep they could’ve made part 4 more emotionally charged on-screen idk i might be nitpicking also, so funny cuz I thought Ep 12 was gonna be airing at 11am or so but then I finish watching this ep at like 9:04 or smth and see The Sign ep 12 live premiere schedule recommended on my YT feed and part 1 is airing right now cuz apparently the ep is releasing at 9 ig

Ep 12 (Feb 24)

Accidentally read a couple words of BLupdate's tweet for the ep and apparently Doctor sacrifices his soul? interesting ig

12-1

Doesn't trust anybody but does trust Chart lol

Okay but atp someone (else) from their unit Has to betray them right? Like Inspector Akk has mentioned it so many times

extremely hilarious to have Phaya who was limping around moments ago and Tharn go in guns blazing in casual clothes while all the other cops are in full gear and bulletproof vests etc

Do any of these gunshots from either side injure/kill anybody at all lmfao

oh finally some ppl (villainous) just drop dead from the shots lol

12-2

agh, Yai and Sand are honestly so cute >.<

So funny for Phaya to be talking about protecting Tharn like yes agree but throughout the show, Tharn has definitely protected you much more lol

Ah, I'm noticing the lighting choices after reading posts about it like the bokeh effect for Phaya and the concentrated warm colours for Tharn

Okay, I can watch this subdued and softer version of sex scene more than the desperate/erratic first one

okay lol ended up skipping last minute or so though heh

10-3

omg gorgeous, beautiful shots and directing and acting for Phaya finding Tharn gone and the whole desperate sequence with the grandma, Yai, the Abbott etc

Ah, Phaya saying that even if hadn't remembered their past lives and past loves, he still would have loved Tharn in this current life, exactlyyyyy that's what I wanna hear

The endless number of times (well, 3) Tharn runs in front of Phaya to protect him

12-4

noo he was taken to the Naga cave and is gonna recover, trust. maybe the Doctor is gonna sacrifice his soul or something to save him, who knows heh

From the flashbacks here and in part 3, I do miss the earlier days when we knew there was Lore but didn't know it yet and they were just cute and such. I very often feel this with paranormal fantasies where the earlier parts of knowing there's something happening but not yet knowing and slowly discovering is my favourite part - when things are simple, yet intriguing

wait I have a question, did Khem die or what? like is he just in the hospital?

Also, Billy in this hospital room looks a bit like Saint?

omg I was like who is that with the long hair but it's Phaya, I guess it has been many months

ah, I was wondering if it'll be 15th days of 11th waxing moon again for Tharn to come home and yeah, guess it's been a whole year fr

man, I wish the meeting again had a bit more fanfare because the despair was done so well, c'mon

Ah, so Doctor didn't die, just gave Tharn his Naga soul to keep him alive but I guess that doesn't kill the Doctor, idk. and he's letting them love each other now

Aw cute but again, anti-climactic and not enough relief, not enough time, not enough emotional impact. I wish they had maybe shown some of Tharn's time there (though that might've taken a bit away from Phaya's desperate situation? idk)

Update: lol I didn't realize there was a little after-credits scene with Saint cameo and season 2 bait

no fr what is that ending, Tharn stayed with Doctor for a year on purpose? and Doctor decided to just get over it? And so Tharn appears all casually over the hill a year later? Seriously needed a stronger ending.

Overall:

I think I liked the first few eps and the potential of the series and the possibilities more than I liked the actual series oof. Since everybody freaking loved this, I also had high expectations.

I just went through the gifs I'd reblogged (I reblogged A Lot cuz I thought I'd end up liking the show more than I ended up liking. went and deleted a bunch bc I was like why did I even reblog this one, what's the point) and I really did like more of the show's gifs from the earlier eps (whereas I enjoyed the analysis and stuff more in the later eps). Don't even feel like reblogging any ep 11 or 12 stuff now though, except maybe the checking under bed sequence. It was also just clear from how invested I was in an episode while watching because in the earlier eps, I was paying more attention and watched an ep in one sitting whereas in the latter half, I would pause in the middle of a section to go on my phone or even just stop watching the ep after a section, do stuff and then come back to finish.

I thought there would be more focus on the romance and fantasy and past lives aspect and less on the cop activity. Like there was no need to spend That much time on the rapist killer case nor Art and Kao's case, we could've spent that time on something like following up on what Lieutenant Tam had learned and the drug case/Tharn's father's case more directly along with more of the actual past lives and fantasy and such. In fact, we got so little about their past lives, I thought there were 4 cycles or something?

I don't know man, I feel like they didn't choose the correct things to show on screen? This sucks because they clearly put in So Much Effort and tried so many new things for BL, so I wish I had loved it more and was more attached.

I think most of the fight scenes and stuff were confusing and not choreographed very well and some interactions/moments/explanations needed to like have more time dedicated to them. However, some moments were just shot/directed so beautifully like ep 11 when grandma is going through the flashbacks of seeing Doctor with Tharn as a child and uni student etc from that single room and ep 12-3 when Phaya wakes up to find Tharn gone, looks under the bed, and the whole sequence after that. (Unfortunate that the reunion scene was so meh).

So many parallels and gifsets of parallels, I keep having to remember my parallels tag is for across different shows while compilation in the tag for same show. I enjoy the parallels and the thought put behind them. It also shows like the cyclical nature of Phaya and Tharn's lives, and it would've been even more impactful if we saw more of their past lives (the original one or the 2 that occurred in the middle apparently).

Highly doubt I'm gonna think of the characters again, I somehow stopped being attached to them about halfway through. Really wanted to give it at least a 7 for trying so many things but don't think it earned it sadly. They tried so many things, as shown in the list of tropes below, but I don't think they satisfyingly merged them or chose the correct things to focus on on-screen.

Running list of tropes: A mix of romance and fantasy lol

Monsters and Cryptids: Sea Monster (naga?), the woman Freen is playing, that tree dude (whatever happened to him? Was that Doctor or something?). Update: the monsters/dieties are the main characters themselves

Police training/cop academy

Murder mystery + a Serial Killer murder mystery + drug ring bust

Tharn seeing the future/people in danger (specifically often seeing Phaya in danger)

Past lives/reincarcation/soulmates

The person Tharn loves will die

Childhood friends (who Tharn gave the locket to). Update: just a fated childhood meeting more like

Does Spin The Bottle count lmao

Love triangle

Lesbians, let's go

Rating: 6.5/10

#ep by ep commentary #the sign

[vanillahub]

General RP style and preferences

Repost, don’t reblog. Bold what applies. Strikethrough what does not. Elaborate on any points you’d like.

Please be honest, we all want to find the people who work best with how we RP.

Types of RP / How I do threads

| I don’t I just do whatever is on my dash when I’m online | Mainly asks | I do little short things  mostly | I do my threads on discord | Long running threads that slowly build upon the muses |  

Plotting Preferences

| Wing it* | Get a general idea ooc and then run with it & plot further if need be | Long expansive thought out story arcs |

* = Only at the start, at some point we will have to get plotting if we wish to go further with our interactions/muses.

Type of threads I do / Prefer

| One-liners only* | Whatever dash shenanigans I’m online for | Para or Multi para | Literal Novels |

* = only for cracks/dash shenanigans/non serious threads

Reply Speed for Threads & Consistency & Keeping threads

|  I lose threads all the time & don’t usually get back to them | I  tend to lose threads but please tell me if I have and I’ll reply! | I  drop threads pretty easily | I’m really slow but I WILL get back to you |  I reply on a schedule/queue* | I usually reply  within a week | I reply every day | I reply almost instantly |

* = The majority of my replies on tumblr are tossed into the queue. I use threads tracker, to help me manage what I've got going. On Discord, there isn't a rhyme or reason to when I get back to replies. Unfortunately, I'm a tad inconsistent there.

Romantic or sexual ships

|  I don’t do these ships (specify reason if you would like)* | I’m not  against them happening but it is not the main point of my blog | All  ships will have to be super slow burn & discussed a lot OOC, super chemistry based (specify reason if you’d like**) | I love doing ships, HMU  I probably already ship it just ask! | I ship really quickly | I  autoship or ship within a few interactions | I mainly RP for the cute  ship fluff or smut |

* = This information can be found in my muses about docs/pages! Besides my NOTPs, my real hard limits for ships are incest and minor/adult ships. ** = I love shipping, but I NEED plotting/discussions. Even for ships I’m biased to and enjoy, I’m strongly against the idea of “collecting” ships. I want every verse to receive the same amount of attention/development, it deserves. With that said, I no longer have the same amount of free time I used to have a few years ago. So, I have been preferring to do a lot of plotting, and mainly play/write the most relevant/key things we want to focus on. No interactions or threads are chronologically locked, we can skip the awkward/rough starts of our muses.

Smut

| I do NOT do smut at  all (specify reason if you’d like) | I’m very selective about it | I  only do it on a separate (blog/discord/specify here*) | I mainly only do  asks relating to the subject on Sundays | I I enjoy writing it |

* = I have a smut blog, which is open for interactions even for mutuals who we still haven't had the chance to plot/interact with! With that said, I have been largerly preferring to write it on Discord.

Active hours [Specify Timezone, if you’d like]

| Mornings 8-10 | Midday 11-1 | Afternoon 2-5 | Evenings 6-8 | Night 9-12 | Ungodly hours of the day 1-onwards | Do you guys keep track of this?

Brazilian timezone: UTC -3, that's all you'll need to know.

Activity Schedule

|  SUPER slow and sporadic, like once a month or so | Slow and sporadic  week long gaps between activity | Bi-weeklyish activity | Weekly  activity (specify if there’s a certain time you have school/work/etc.  off that you are most active) | Daily activity | I’m online nearly all  the time |

Being online doesn't mean I'm properly active.

Starters

| I don’t do starter calls | I want to do starter  calls but often don’t have time | I do selective calls (specify) | I  don’t do calls, but always fee free to ask me for one!* I do starter  calls rarely/regularly/often |

* = I have never had any luck with starters call, SO... I much prefer turning meme replies into threads. With that said, I'll be more than glad to write a starter for someone, if they reach me out and ask for it :)

AUs

| I don’t do AUs | My blog is an AU but  outside of that I don’t do them | I sometimes do them but only with a  lot of plotting | I have a couple of AUs already feel free to request  them! | I have AUs coming out of my ears please interact with them! | I  love making AUs HMU to plot if you think of one! | There are some AUs I  won’t do (specify here)* |

Check out my verses sections in my muses Abouts! *= AUs that basically nullify HUGE chunks of essential lore moments (such as 'no order 66 AU' [for SW], 'Aiolos didn't die AU' [for Saint Seiya], 'Protag doesn't become the region's champion AU' [for Pokemon], 'the Belmonts are buddies with Dracula' [for Castlevania]), I'm VERY selective with these kinds of AUs/stories, as such I will most likely give them a pass.

Crossovers

| I  don’t do crossovers (specify reason if you’d like) | I’m selective with  crossovers (specify reason if you’d like)* | I love crossovers! |

* = The fandoms/series I outright refuse to follow/interact with are: Undertale, MLP, FNaF, Homestuck, Genshim Impact, League of Legends, FnF, Disney, Marvel and Historical/Religion/Real person fiction. || Most well known series: Castlevania, pokemon, Star wars, YGO, Tekken and Sonic! I rarely do crossovers, because it is not something I'm interested in doing most of the time! Even with franchises I'm into, I don't get a lot of enjoyment out of RPing them.

#[ rambles ]

[hiriajuu-suffering]

If you were born as the opposite sex, what sort of person do you think you would be?

Entitled. I'd be a more entitled person.

Let's start from childhood. I get more pressured to being like my sister by her given we're the same gender, while I have less weight of expectations of my family because patriarchy. My paternal grandfather loses his favorite grandchild (he was a horrible girl dad if I'm being honest), and instead of being no ones favorite at 7 when he passed away, I'm never anyone's favorite. Assuming I have similar interests, meaning I find my way into being a weeb fairly early, I'd hedge my bets my sister would mentally torment me as much, if not more. From 2005-2020, my relationship with my sister best resembles Azula & Zuko's relationship from Avatar: the Last Airbender so I'm not sure much changes being a girl. My mother probably treats me more as an individual since I know she looks at being a girl mom so much more highly than being boy mom, but that likely results in life actions being of more behavioral conformity. I was a disappointment to my father in adulthood anyways, so not sure how it would've changed his outlook on life having two daughters: I would think the patriarchal norms ingrained in him would've left him with some despair.

Adolescence, I'm less pressured to do anything athletic overall so going on the same track of band to debate would've made me feel I was too good for most boys. A nerdy version of a Haruhi Suzumiya complex, most likely, given my dating patterns as a guy already resembled that. Part of me wants to say I'd start off in the right high school, but part of me still doesn't think my parents would truly listen regardless of gender. Surprisingly, I think I get the same debate experience regardless of gender but I just do better in school while it's happening. I have far less relationship trauma because I'm not riddled with the uniquely problematic experiences I got then, but maybe they'd be substituted with equally damning ones, who knows.

The first real difference is it's absolutely easier to sell your image as an cis-AFAB than a cis-AMAB to the music industry in 2010. I think it's far more likely I get the record deal given the internship opportunity in the first place. There would've been a path set forward me, had I just been a girl, for me to be a singer-songwriter and be given a real opportunity to make it happen. I don't get that as a non-Christianized, primarily English-performing man, point blank. Flashpoint 1.

Let's say my entire academic trajectory stays similar, getting me out of school after Fall 2015 w/ a gap year and transfer. I probably go straight into teaching instead of being pressured by my father's expectations to come out of his industry overall. I lose the void that me made continue with card games, and retire my entire tcg career on what I did in ygo, not seeing a reason to continue until likely much later in life if at all. Flashpoint 2.

I've seem to have already fallen into a relationship I can settle for as a man at this point in life, so let's say the same occurs as a woman. From a patriarchal position, I'm more likely to be able to force the issue and be engaged in 2017 (25). Already having been where I thrive stably from an economic perspective, there's hardly any scenario I don't see myself married at 26: I don't think I consider polyamory yet without the uniquely cishet male trauma I carry, I want to believe I'd convince my husband of it but, if I'm being realistic with myself, not being forced to be that conscientious with myself means I won't be. I'm married 5 years ago, Flashpoint 3.

Given the entire transitory period in my twenties, the three years of 2016-2018, is far more stable, I lose out on my retail experience so some less fortunate outcomes actually do come to pass with how 2020 hit us all. First child is probably had in mid-2019, to which I don't return to my position teaching to be a homemaker. Pandemic hits, hopefully husband doesn't get laid off, probably have a second child sometime between late-2021 to early-2023. With enough parenting experience, probably start relying on my and spouse's parents to shoulder some responsibility, meaning probably reentering the workforce for the 2023-2024 school year because inflationary pressures and whatnot. I'm at a similar spot, not working on graduate school or being remotely involved in the anime community at the present time, with two kids to show for it in exchange - possibly thinking about having a third before 2028. Life would be way different in that I'd be picturesquely normal on the surface, even if I wasn't in practice.

The derivative question being asked is how would current me look at alternate, gender-swapped version of me. She'd be sheltered, lucky, privileged, and without reason to live conscientiously or even ethically. Life would be easier, I would probably be happier, but I'd be doing less with life beyond normalcy, not reaching outside of my social barriers and not embodying the sort of transcending of social barriers my patriarchal trauma as a male makes me believe in. I push boundaries because I'm forced to think about what's right-and-wrong in my male experience; as a woman, I simply have to agree what progressivism looks like for gender relationships because I never have to work outside normative boundaries to find a place to be complacent in. Some of the most central parts of my identity don't get totally lost when gender is swapped, it just gets obscured: like my moral character is behind lock-and-key instead of choices I'd know I'd make.

While this a valuable thought experiment to have, it's not fun to think about because every area of myself I'd know I'd be less-than makes me feel like a misogynist for thinking that way. To my masculine self, being happy and more secure is a vapidly vain set of net-benefits, one that shows moral folly. Meanwhile, my feminine self would look at my current self with such disdain on why I choose to be miserable, specifically because I'd be so much more like my family in thinking intrapersonal drives come before ethical conscientiousness. I don't have to wonder since my schizotypy does have a feminine-layered identity I can look to.

Not sure I could even recognize AFAB me as who I am, since it would be so removed from my self-image.

#personal #thought exercise #thought experiment #gender identity #gender switch #gender swap

[mothman-is-my-girlfriend]

Saw this making the rounds on my dashboard and wanted to add to the chain!

1. Are you named after anyone? Yes, actually. My mom was a very big fan of Jimmy Buffett in the 90s (and still is but it's not a daily occurrence anymore lol) so I'm actually named after his daughter, Savannah. Funny tidbit to mention when people ask if I'm named for the city in Georgia. 😅

2. When was the last time you cried? Oh, girl... I cry all the time. My brain has a hard time tracking emotions over time so I just kind of feel everything very intensely in the moment. I have to use journals to track my emotions over time, but I'm just a fairly sensitive person in general thanks to my upbringing. It is what it is, and I deal with it. I'm just glad I let it out frequently instead of bottling it up like I used to!

3. Do you use sarcasm? Ehhh.... sometimes, maybe? Depends on your definition of sarcasm. I have a hard time figuring out when people are joking with me though, especially at work.

4. What's the first thing you notice about people? Usually their personality to be honest. I had a really hard time making friends as a kid so I pretty much get along with someone right away, or we aren't ever friends. (Not to say that I'm ever outright rude to people, of course.) I guess that's just ADHD to ADHD communication? For example, I had a new coworker start in mid September and I just immediately knew we'd be friends outside of work eventually. Now we go on hikes and hang out! Idk how else to describe the feeling.

5. What's your eye color? Hazel - which is annoying because most people assume I'm full of shit until I'm in good light. 🤣 any other lighting and the green doesn't show through.

6. Scary movie or happy ending? I love creepy-scary vibes but actually watching or playing a scary movie or game is too much for me. I don't enjoy being scared. Happy endings for me!

7. Any special talents? I'm quite good at art when given proper direction. I'm thinking of taking some non credit classes at my local community college to really push me back into my old hobby in a way that isn't just drawing my little OCs on blank backgrounds. I have painted a few things this year, though, like a portrait of my cat, and a flower pot. I really need to get back into it. I'd say my stronger skill at the moment is making exceptional coffee! I love my job and enjoy brewing at home as well.

8. Where were you born? Maryland. (Mid Atlantic US) I still live in MD, but I made the jump from the teeny tiny town I grew up in, to Baltimore. I love the city, and this state. It's little, but we have the ocean, the famous Chesapeake Bay, Assateague Island, and a bit of the Appalachians. When you get past the terrible traffic, there's so much to do here.

9. What are your hobbies? Doodling, playing older video games, hiking/camping, and learning as much as I can about coffee.

10. Do you have any pets? This is such a complex answer for me. I have two cats currently living with my partner and I in our home. Our lease wouldn't allow us to bring my snakes, so my mother is currently caring for my two ball pythons. I hope to have a whole room for them one day when I get a home! My mom also still has one of my childhood dogs, Chance, who is 13, and struggling with dementia and arthritis. He comes to visit me sometimes. :) I miss that big old dopey dog.

11. What sports do you play/have you played? I was actually involved in competitive cheerleading growing up. I remember it fondly, even if I wasn't ever very flexible and kept losing my backhand spring no matter how many times I learned. I had the best jump on my team, though! Unfortunately, I do have permanent damage to my knees and shoulders from it. The knee pain in particular has kept me off the hiking trails for the last year. :(

12. How tall are you? VERY short! I'm 5'2 (even shorter than gillian anderson lol) which is hilarious because my partner is a solid foot taller than me!!

13. What was your favorite subject in school? Growing up, my favorite subject was definitely band class. I can remember every song we played in my 8th grade year. I still miss Mrs. Ewing! She was an incredible teacher and our simple middle school band was actually well known in the area for being better than most high school bands! I also adored Latin class and I'm even friends with my old magistra on facebook 😅 she had a tumblr back in 2015 when I had her class so maybe she's still bouncing around on here somewhere. She made a point to never tell us her username lol

14. Dream job? This has actually changed a lot recently. Now that I've been a barista for 2 years, I've really developed a passion for making coffee. I'm signed up for some business classes at my local community college next month and have ideas for my own coffee roasting business one day. I'm envisioning a shop named for my cat, Oliver. ❤️ Coffee tastes good, and I love the connections you can make with people through it. Idk, it just makes me really happy to see customers enjoy my coffee while catching up with an old friend, or sitting on their laptop doing work all day in the shop while I'm also working. Food service really isn't all bad when you have a great crew.

Thanks for reading all of that! If you see this and you're my mutual (or not) consider yourself tagged and free to copy this.

#me #personal life

[latejulys]

a lot of my mutuals have the same name and some of you change urls like you’re in the witness protection program so whenever i hang out in the dash i’m just like 👁👄👁

#if i'm being honest.. i lose track of who you are like.. 2 or 3 urls afterwards <3 #u know what.. scratch that the moment u change ur url i forget u and just accept that we are Friends nonetheless <3 #i only rmb some if they've sent me an ask before 😭 #that's how i check who ppl are aside from their carrds #y.txt

[artemispt]

LANDO TALKS ABOUT CARLANDO

Lando Norris Interview - Beyond The Grid (March 2020)

The friendship with Carlos seems genuine.

Lando: "Yeah"

Is it?

Lando: "Yeah, it is. Everything we do none of it is acting, none of it something we're not. We both just enjoying being where we are, working with each other. And with McLaren we're free to just be who we want to be. We don't need to hide or be someone we're not, like I think you do see in other teams. For what I've seen of Carlos his very different to what he was the last few years."

Have you discuss that? This he admit that?

Lando: "I don't know, I haven't..."

It feels... I haven't discussed it with him, but just as an observer he seems very relaxed in this environment, he seems very relaxed around you, where in Renault he had Hülkenberg and...

Lando: "Yeah, anyone that is in Red Bull situation it's just tense, I think. Because you always have another driver that's there somewhere. Yeah, you know the story how Red Bull works."

So, Carlos. You live vaguely close to each other in the UK. Do you hang out?

Lando: "Hmm, not...he's rarely there, to be honest. He lives in Spain still."

That's not what he tells us in the media - “I've moved to Woking"

Lando: "Ok, yes. He's there a lot of the time"

You just blown his cover.

Lando: "Oh shait. (laughs) He's 50/50, he lives in Spain, he still goes and live with his family a lot of the time, but I say he's there good 2/3 days a week obviously to be at McLaren. So when is there, he's mostly at McLaren. Normally for the weekends he flies back and then for the week after he'll come back. So, when he's there we play on the sim or go to play topgolf."

Together, you go to the driver range?

Lando: "Yes."

Whack a few balls.

Lando: "I mean, he's really good at golf."

Yeah, he is isn't he?

Lando: "I'm freaking awful."

Oh yeah?

Lando: “Yeah, yeah. He actually helds me quite a bit (?)"

So what happens when it gets tasty, you know let's hope that McLaren is competitive this year and you guys are fighting the (???). When it gets a bit tasty on track between you and you're fighting at the same bit of tarmac, do you envisage a situation where it's gonna get out of control? Or do you think that the friendship is deeper enough for you guys to got to deal...

Lando: “I know that at some point in the future, and this year, its gonna get more tense and more (???) and we’re gonna probably fall out a few times in terms of getting frustrated with one another or…you know, he holds me up or something or I hold him up or something. Not on purpose, ‘cause I don’t think it’ll never go that far, but…you know, you lose out a position or something because you’re racing, or you are side by side and you squeeze him and he has to run off or you have to run off the track, or something like that. Someone is going to be annoyed about and one of us is going to be unhappy. Yes, I think that’s gonna happen but I don’t know…”

Have you discussed it?

Lando: "No."

Have you discussed with Andreas Seidl, team principal?

Lando: "I think we have a very good understanding for one another, for our best interests for each other and ourselves but also the team and what we want to achieve with the team and obviously hopping to be with McLaren in the future years. And for that, do what we did last year. Without working what we did last year and having our own principles, respect for one another and try to helped each other and be a team, we would not finish 4th on the constructors last year. A lot of good results from him were helped by me and a lot of my results were helped by him. So, we've worked very well together and I think it has been very beneficial for us and of course that's more what I meant by if we can stay in McLaren, that's our goal. We want be winning races, we don't want to just be P8, P9 like we were last year. We want to be winning and to even better. So, for each other in (???) to this year I think we've done the best job we could to (???) together"

Full interview

#carlando #carlos sainz #carlos sainz jr #carlos sainz junior #lando norris #mclaren f1 #f1

[hiddenramen]

i think of you as a very smart person, and if you've done the research, i'm especially interested to know your take on the depp/heard court case. i tend to think people wanted to believe johnny depp from the beginning and they were looking for every opportunity to frame amber heard as a lying abusive bitch, but if you think she's clearly making it all up, i'm willing to be convinced.

The case, quite frankly, is ridiculously complicated, mostly because both parties have lied repeatedly, both parties consistently change aspects of their stories, both parties have been physical and have histories of being physical even outside of their relationship, and also a lot of the witnesses aren't exactly rockstar testimonies (mostly because 1) almost every witness who's testified on Depp's behalf has been on his payroll or financially dependent on him, 2) everyone seems to dislike Amber so much they only testify on her behalf begrudgingly, and 3) they have trotted out some of the quackiest goddamn experts, like holy fuck).

I definitely don't think Amber Heard is making it all up, though, so there's no convincing for me to do there: there is absolutely conclusive evidence that Johnny Depp has been physically violent with Amber Heard on multiple occasions, and do not let anyone tell you different. There is a reason Johnny Depp keeps losing these cases and it's not rigged juries.

There are text messages from Heard, going back to before she married him, with her talking privately about him being abusive towards her. She has no reason to be lying in these messages. There are a lot of text messages of Johnny apologizing for undisclosed deeds (the contention with most of those is that they both claim Johnny is apologizing for different things: Johnny tends to claim things were innocuous, Amber tends to claim they were extremely severe. I tend to believe Amber's recollections more than his, although Amber does embellish things frequently, provably and demonstrably. The difference is that Amber embellishes or dramatizes or adds flourishes and details; Johnny just flat out lies).

Emails and texts from Johnny seem to support the narrative that he was mistreating Amber and he knew it, since he frequently talks about how his marriage has been going better because he "put the monster back in the cage," and so on and so forth. In a lot of his emails and texts, he fully accepts the blame for why their marriage is frequently contentious. As early as March of 2013, Amber is telling her mom that Johnny is crazy and physically abusive when he's using substances, which tracks with what Johnny's saying in emails and texts (i.e. that the majority of the so-called "out of character" abuse happens when Johnny is drunk or high, which is more and more frequently as time goes on). There's texts from Johnny's PA to Amber that confirm that Johnny is lying about at least one incident and that Amber is telling the truth (or at least something closer to it). There's testimony from doctors saying that Johnny is lying about Amber cutting his finger off by ninja-throwing a bottle (he seems to have done that himself while high). He's drastically exaggerating the extent of the damages he's suffered because of Amber, when in reality it seems like most of the financial damage he's incurred has actually been the fault of his substance abuse issues and poor money management.

Like, Amber definitely isn't perfectly honest, not by a longshot, but I think the majority of Amber's lies are just embellishing the extent and degree of the physical abuse, not making up that the abuse occurred. There are injuries Amber claims she had that there's no way she had, at least not to the degree she claims, but she did probably have injuries when she says she had them. Like, for instance, she claims at one point to be doing an interview with a busted face, a broken nose, broken ribs, and two extremely severe black eyes; in reality, I think she probably had a black eye and some bruising to the ribs. Stuff like that. It's why she keeps getting nailed on like, "Oh, there's no way she could've covered that with makeup." and like, yeah, I agree, but the takeaway isn't that she made the bruise up, just that she exaggerated how bad it was, and the real injury probably was one that you could cover with makeup.

This is also all complicated by the fact that, by most accounts, Amber is not a particularly likeable person, and is in fact rather shitty towards her staff, while Johnny seems to be fairly well-liked (at least when he's sober, which is an important distinction). But, whether she's likeable or not, there's significant evidence that she was abused by Johnny Depp, and a lot of these cases (which are, frankly, unwinnable from a legal perspective) seem to just be Johnny trying to punish Amber for "ruining him."

Anyway this is too long and I'm lowkey rambling but like, if you have any more specific questions about the case or the allegations or what have you, I'm happy to answer them.

#tl;dr is that everyone sucks in this case #but amber heard is a bratty spoiled and rather unlikeable woman who was absolutely abused by her husband #and johnny depp is an aging movie star with a massive ego who cannot accept his own fall from grace #and is a wildly different person when drunk or high #fin #also i don't know who shit on the bed but that is the highlight of the case