#its all just so pointless

[the-kipsabian]

i love waking up to realizations that my life is in shambles and i have no future

#its quarter to four and im just getting out of bed - once again feels like ive barely slept or rested at all #i have nothing to do. nowhere to go. the one thing im responsible for is my cat which is the only reason im not staying in bed #every effort i make about anything is pointless. every job i apply for rejects me. i cant get into schools. i cant afford online classes #anything im passionate about i cant work with. wrestling doesnt pay here. nobody wants to hire an inexperienced writer #i'd love to do something with games but im too fucking stupid on top of being talentless and not getting education #im just. fucking stuck. i cant do anything or be good enough at anything to make anything work #the one thing i was qualified for didnt hire me. the one school i really wanted into didnt accept me #i have nowhere to go and nothing i can do about anything. i have no skills i can put into use and what i have are not good enough #doing stuff on the hobby level isnt taking me anywhere. i want to like what i do but its increasingly more difficult every day #when its not leading me to anything. personal happiness isnt helping me forward or paying my growing pile of bills #i just.. dont know what to do. where to go. why am i here why am i trying. whats the point when nothing is ever going to work out for me #its all just so pointless #night is an absolute mess on main

[bucephaly]

It's kinda shocking to me how few people seem to know how prevalent the 'my great grandmother was cherokee' myth is and how it's almost never actually true, especially when it comes with things like 'never signed up' or 'fell off the trail' or 'courthouse burned down destorying the documentation' etc etc.

People just don't even seem to know the history like.. when the Trail happened. My great great great grandfather was 2 years old during Removal in 1838, so peoples 'my great grandmother hid in the mountains!' is so clearly wrong. And we have rolls. From before and after removal, rolls done by cherokee nation and others by the government, rolls that were not stored in one random flammable courthouse. It's not difficult to find the actual evidence of ancestry.

And just.. there are lots of ways those family stories get started. It was a practice during the confederacy to claim cherokee ancestry to show one's family had 'deep roots in the south' that they were there before the cherokee were removed. Many people pretended to be cherokee and applied for the Guion-Miller payout just to try to steal money meant for cherokees - 2/3rds of the applicants were denied for having 0 proof of actual cherokee ancestry. [We even see lawyers advertising signing up for the Miller roll just to try to get free money.] And the myth even started in some families in the cherokee land lotteries, where the land stolen from us was raffled off, including the house and everything that was left behind when the cherokees were removed. We have seen people whose families just take these things stolen from the cherokee family and adopt them into their own family story, saying that they were cherokee themselves.

If you had some family story about being cherokee and you wanna have proof one way or the other, check out this Facebook group run by expert cherokee genealogists that do research for free. Just please read the rules fully and respect the researchers. They run thousands of people's ancestries a year and their average is only around 0.7% of lines they run actually end up having true cherokee ancestry.

#and ive heard even dumber origins of the cherokee family myth #such as an ancestor having a silly sounding name so the descendents just go 'oh she mustve been an indian!!!' #i was one of the few people who had my ancestry done on the facebook and had genuine cherokee ancestry #[though i had found it before it was just really validating to get it double checked and i started finding cousins (:] #like. i was told once when i was a kid by my grandma that my dad had cherokee ancestry and i didnt believe her. its wild that so many peopl #will make it a Fixture of their identity [or even just smth they bring up ever] with Zero proof #at least for cherokees from what ive seen its usually considered really disrespectful to claim to have cherokee ancestry without #actually having the documentation [like ancestors on the rolls] #and no a dna test doesnt count. nor does 'my dad is Clearly not white!' or 'high cheekbones' or old family photos or anything #i had this discussion with someone recently whose dad had been calling himself 3/4 native but didnt know exactly what nation ???? hello? #and its like... sorry but ur dad is like. italian lol. #[and blood quantum is bullshit anyway im tired of the 'im 1/16 cherokee' comments its dumb #cherokee nation does not have a blood quantum requirement. its pointless bringing it up in the discussion of who is or isnt cherokee] #also mandatory disclaimer that im reconnecting. i didnt grow up connected to the culture of even knowing my ancestry #this is all from my looking into this stuff over the past year or so. i cant claim to be an authority over anything regarding this #this is p much all my repeating things ive heard said by people who know a lot more than i do haha #man. and this isnt even starting to get into the fake tribe stuff. the only legit cherokee groups are the 3 federally recognized bands #cherokee nation of oklahoma. united keetoowah band. and the eastern band of cherokee indians. #any others that are state recognized or not at all arent acknowledged as legitimate by any of the legit cherokee groups #anyway. my final message goodb.ye #cherokee #tsalagi

[sonknuxadow]

he has his fathers eyes <3

#its probably just a cool lighting effect that doesnt mean anything but whatever #im normal im so normal #me the other day: idk a sonic generations remaster sounds really pointless. not interested #me now: SHADOW <333 MY BEST FRIEND SHADOW <333 #in my defesnse i didnt know. that they would put all this in there. i thought it would just be shadow as a new playable character #or somethin #g

[pictureday2005]

i dont need therapy or medication i need it to be 2007. i need it to be my full time job to learn and explore and be curious about the world around me again

#crayon on envelope #i cant do any of that shit when i gotta have a job #i really miss when all i had to do was go to school #like i didnt realize how good i had it at the time #go in for like six hours and still have time and sunlight to do what i wanted when i got home #weekends off where all your friends Also have it off so you can organize hanging out #the whole summer to yourself #honestly i feel like id be doing so much better psychologically if i could have summer vacation again lol #bc at least then i was working towards something #just gotta get through the year so i can enjoy my summer #now its like. why am i even doing all of this #why is my only goal to suffer till i get a paycheck #and i dont even get to keep most of it #pointless luv litchrally pointless

[pcktknife]

ill be like 'i need a new sketchbook' and for what i dont even draw like that no more 🧍🏾

#i put pencil to paper. draw a circle and predict the drawings already going nowhere so i just give up #i cant even attempt to draw without getting instantly tired.bored. fed up. etc etc #it feels pointless #i used to fill sketchbooks save for like idk 3-4 pages i cant even draw on one page anymore head in hands #i feel the same digitally but im able to experiment in ways i cant on regular paper #it still makes me tired tho #i feel like if i get a new book ill do something different but its all the same #its getting so bad im considering school wahhhh #kae.txt

[spacedlexi]

when u want to like a character so so bad but theyre a cop so its impossible

#sorry even if theyre hot my first thought will always be 'cop' and it kills all desire #slams head thru wall #vi arcane i want to love u so bad......but i look at u and see COP and its over for me 😐 #and her cop gf 😐😔 #before anybody gets mad at me im just sad 😔 shes great otherwise like she fits my fave types but this wall is insurmountable #she grew up in the SLUMS and they make her an ENFORCER??? die #she was wrongfully imprisoned for like a decade and they make her an enforcer 😐😐😐😐 #after finishing arcane i went to read her lore 😐 #felt so Liberal 😐😔 weh weh both sides bad type beat #girl its not too late please dont be a cop and cait pls leave the force PLEASE i cant defend you like this #anybody else trapped in this torture prison abt her or is it just me please tell me im not alone in this #every time i see her on my dash it pains me so much like physically mentally.... #its ok at least i have my other vi who fights ex military with her gf to avoid becoming soldiers in a pointless war :) blink blink #it speaks #only posting this bc i need to know who else is suffering over this.............. it cant just be me

[francy-sketches]

Objectively cersei is a terrible mom to all her kids not just tommen like just bc she’s not outright abusive to joffrey doesn’t mean she did a good job raising him lol. But also part of me is like nooo how could she be a bad mom to him that’s her baby boy she’s just encouraging his interests which just happen to be murder and abuse (god forbid women do anything) 🙄 And it just so happens that he’s a perfect little clone of her I’m sure she’d still care about him if he wasn’t 🥰 Maybe tommen and myrcella just have bad vibes have you considered that. Maybe they’re just stupid little flop babies it’s not her fault -_- they don’t even have a passing interest in atrocities. Cringe

#.txt #‘her kids would be better off without her’ noo not joffrey that’s her little baby 🥺 #objectively he would not be like that if he was raised by normal people but #that would be boring I like him when he’s silly 🤪 #all jokes aside their relationship makes me a bit insane ❤️ #bc it’s like. the closest thing she has to a normal loving relationship with any of her children #but it’s only like that bc he never goes against her #its so fun to think about what would have happened if he lived #also I think the whole ‘does she genuinely love her kids’ thing is so boring #it’s just kinda pointless idk #like she can genuinely love them and still be a shitty mother. those things are not mutually exclusive

[likeasaltedwound]

sometimes i think about how sam was always meant to outlive dean and how HARD he tried to change that. His big brother is dying of a heart attack, his big brother is dying of a car crash, his big brother is dying over and over on tuesday, his big brother is dying by the hellhounds, his big brother is dying by his hand, his big brother is dying in a barn and i just. fuck. your elder brother will always die first, that's the way it's supposed to go kid.

#supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #just FUCK!!! it makes me insane #not to discredit the amount of times sam died and was brought back/similar by dean #but with dean there's a distinct sense he's fixing something that's not MEANT to happen #sam is not meant to be put in a supernatural gauntlet and he sure as hell is not supposed to jump in hell #dean avoiding sam's death feels almost like the natural course of action bc the baby brother is not supposed to die #and specially not by these magical fatalities #while sam is the opposite the very thing he's trying to avoid feels like how things were always meant to be #he can rewrite and reshape their story all he wants but its so POWERLESS and most importantly so pointless #supernatural meta #if this makes a scrap of sense

[blujaydoodles]

WIP-- I've been working on updating my huge ridiculous Too Many Gnomes height chart recently, and have spent a frankly absurd amount of time just on very minutely adjusting proportions, because that's my idea of a good time, for some reason. Also I added Indigo and it's really funny to me because for some reason between my designing them and now they've taken on a distinctly Tall Energy in my mind, so actually drawing them at their canon size is almost jarring jkghdfkg like OH YEAH SHORT KING, OKAY!!

These are just my guys, but there are currently twelve gnomes in this file! But I'm still fixing a lot of old bad anatomy and stuff, and also I might even fuck around and color it before sharing the full thing 🤔

#dnd #dungeons and dragons #gnomes #character art #illustration #sketches #[squinting at this] idri's hips need to be wider. #like do you see what I mean! why am I like this jdfghdgk #in theory I started making this so I could use it to help me doodle gnomes doing stuff together for funsies #in practice drawing a bunch of guys Just Standing There is its own reward it turns out #the other night I was talking about it kind of self deprecatingly like 'I'm spending all this time on stupid & pointless art for no reason' #and my husband very sincerely was like 'no??? are you having fun?' -- me-- sheepishly: ... yeah I am 'THEN IT'S NOT DUMB OR POINTLESS.' #I am. I AM having fun! sorry to my audience/ friends that my art is so boring to look at but I AM having fun making it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #anyway [scoops a bunch of gnomes into a big pile and sits on it like a broody hen] #my OCs #idri #melliwyk #felix #indigo #dungeons and doodles

[prussianmemes]

you should kill yourself if you spend 12 minutes sorting around your notes on your desk, making sure they look messy but also the prettiest ones are on top, posing your textbook open and having the most "academia" looking web page or lecture slides on your laptop screen before taking a picture and posting it on your social media story while quietly scrolling through songs to put with it.

#every time exam season comes around #people do this religiously #i hate it profusely it's so incredibly vain and pointless #you're like the people who go to the library for an epic study day and set up your big environment #only to sit on your phone for 5 hours #have the humility to be honest about your study habits and what works and what doesn't #i feel like its a form of cognitive dissonance this type of stuff and a form of lying to themselves #which is the one person you should always be brutally honest to #txt #i plan ahead and give myself so much extra time because i know my time efficiency is dogshit and i compensate for that #i try to avoid talking to other people about studying and i try to insulate myself when i am #of course for med school it's impossible not to talk about it as your classmates will bring it up in every third conversation #which opens the pandora's box of listening to other people talk about it which is atrocious as all people ever take away from it is #'oh my god everyone is doing so much more i'm so behind' #which isn't true everyone is in their own variation of hell just slightly different #i try to block it out completely when i can #med students have this annoying tendency to group themselves into these circles of self feeding despair and nervousness #i mean all of med insta is full of dogshit memes like this of the same 'le epic med stress' memes #kill yourselves you people are self fulfilling prophecies #josef lada ice these fools #to chce klid #as the man said #a taky trošku sebevědomí #and also not listening or giving a fuck what anyone else is doing #každý ma svůj systém a svůj styl #and have a life outside of this as well

[roachyreblobs]

kinda hate the stereotypes of Asians having this clear soft pale skin like no my culture isn’t just fucking anime and k dramas there’s other things to it :/

#ALSO THIS IS DIRECTED AT TRANSRACIALS #“Oh guys you wanna pass as Asian then watch a lot of k drama and know your anime’s 🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺” #“Wear lighter concealer so your skin isn’t too dark!! 🤭☺️☺️” #LIKE NO SHUT UP #STFU #UGH #ITS SO STUPID #anyways sorry for going on this pointless rant #If you like anime and k drama and stuff like that it’s completely fine #It’s just really annoying when that’s all my ethnicity is dumbed down to #I’ve recently been seeing a lot of those “transracials” popping up lately #Soooo yeah sorry abt this rant <\3 #Vent #i think #idk if it counts

[disastercit]

ok ive gotten in the loop. 4 new episodes, that's weirdly specific but still exciting!!! some people have pointed out that if there were two more batches like this later in the year it would add up to the 12 episode season we're used to. i guess it could also be 4 extended-length episodes like the 20 special.

or even just 4 regular length episodes and that's it. but i feel like setting up that whole "until next summer" thing, along with the new voice actors and merch and the big rooster teeth convention being themed around the show this year, just to release a 1/3 length season of 10 minute episodes would be a little weird?? not necessarily impossible, but i don't know why they would do that.

i'm not gonna get my hopes up because literally all we know is that 4 episodes are coming and we have no solid evidence that anything else will happen. still, i feel like all that setup indicates that they could possibly have bigger plans than they're letting on

#camp camp #to be entirely fair this is ROOSTER TEETH we're talking about #trying to apply logic here is kind of pointless. its rooster teeth #afaik they also havent said that this season will be the last of camp camp ive just been making that assumption myself #ive never liked a show early on that went on to have more than 5 seasons. honestly 3 was probably the maximum barring camp camp itself #im so used to everything i like getting cancelled early on #plus i had kind of mostly come to terms with the death of camp camp by 2022 so it continuing at all was already unexpected

[fitzrove]

[shaking and biting] but what does it MEAN. what does it SAY what is the THEME

#akkdlflf i watched this long lecture video abt austrian national identity and the researcher said 'the austrians are quite adept at #selling the austro hungarian monarchy back to tourists incl ones from former parts of the empire... but even in the imperial nostalgia they #don't want back multilingualism or multiculturalism or any of what it actually was' #(it was a lot abt the way in which austria deals with orban's hungary in and after the 2015 refugee crisis) #ajskgldo and that just made me think about... how pointless some things feel. both in fiction and in academic research #you CAN say meaningful things about almost any topic and with almost any argument! but in some strands of history trying to 'uncover events' #with no exploration of the context and what it all MEANS and what the things we think about it mean #is the most prevalent and popular type of research :/ like there's a reason i overrely on hamann's bio of rudolf because her central thesis #is that he wasnt a crazy murderer but someone with a forward-thinking political vision that went as far as suggesting a sort of 'proto-EU' #among other things #so like. she is looking at what it all MEANS!!! #and like. my favourite todolf fanfics are also like that 😂😭 perhaps not abt politics but about suffering and power dynamics and guilt #same for original fiction. i'm never happy if a book i'm reading isnt saying something #or then again - this is more personal pickiness but. they should also be saying something NEW AND INTERESTING #a lot of the time. sometimes if you have a fave trope you can just enjoy it over and over #but idk even tropey stuff can say things #ajlsldkfkf i'm just so tired of kitsch in all its forms and also of bad science

[ilynpilled]

A Storm of Swords - Arya I

A Storm of Swords - Jaime II

A Storm of Swords - Arya V

A Storm of Swords - Jaime III

#they are approaching the inn where they miss eachother #from opposite directions #but arya actually is near them thru the wolves #arya v also has everyone discussing jaimes potential whereabouts #and he is very emphasized the whole chapter #like idk the paralleling here is interesting to me #arya is tied to the same locations as jb constantly they keep missing eachother its so funny #ntm their connection to lsh and rw respectively #later i always found it so interesting how focused on sansa jb were even tho it is a pointless search bc the reader knows she is at the vale #yet they keep being connected to arya #always wondered whether this was building to something #ntm what i realized recently about what a significant motif the moon is in jaimes arc #also just all the rumors she hears about them r always so funny #if it doesnt mean anything it is still a fun detail though lol #the j/cat/b rumor is from arya v too 😭 #arya stark #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #asoiaf #valyrianscrolls #also did arya save jb from an earlier mummers encounter #oh shes so based

[perenlop]

my hope for the pokemon presents that i know will not happen is gates to infinity remake ok bye

#listen i knowwwwwwww explorers is more popular and its got more fans and itd sell well and itd be good to see it in the spotlight #i agree with all that it makes sense. but i cant help but view it as a bowsers inside story remake scenario #where its just like. kinda pointless bc the original is functionally fine #meanwhile my soul hurts when i think about how gti was kinda screwed over by its development and time #it came out during that time all 3ds games felt really janky to play so it feels awkward #and like. just compare the environments in gti compared to psmd #psmd doessss have more diverse environments to be fair but environments that should feel more grand just feel off in gti #like glacier palace doesnt look AWFUL but it hurts to see it compared to the animated version from the commercials #and like. imagine the glow up if it got the dx treatment. if the environments were all fixed and the job system was updated #and we got a larger starter pool and maybe even a postgame. ik they didnt add much to pmd dx #but that game had a fairly beefy postgame and all that while gti has.... pretty much nothing besides dlc #anyways it wont happen bc gti is the most hated pmd game by a fairly wide margin and itd piss ppl off and itd probably get a bullshit $60 #price tag #but like. i want it. i want it ok. i want to see them fix gti and bring out its full potential. i love its story sm #ik theres the demake but theyre also changing the pokemon choices there (which ik they cant help. repository doesnt have timburr and gurdur #but still) so i kinda wanna wait to see when thats done or its got all the assets

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Everyone's arguing over the "is Luzu the father? Is Wilbur the father?" thing in reference to the egg Quackity's taking care of (which is a dragon's egg, might I remind you) and tbh if it wasn't for the fact Rubius is so obsessed with Vegetta and busy keeping him single on a server full of eligible bachelors, Rubius would ABSOLUTELY show up in the middle of that debate with a steel chair labeled "Rubckity"

#i talk #qsmp talk #Tntduo fans: Wilbur is the father! #Luckity fans: Luzu is the father! #Rubius: Hey Qua— #Quackity: RUBIUS IS THE FATHER #I'm a massive fan of all but realistically #Wilbur will not log on until a week after the event has ended #Luzu's in the middle of moving and streams at the crack of dawn so his schedule doesnt line up with Quackity's #(though he said he might do an afternoon stream this week) #And Rubius — as much as he loves matching Quackity's chaos — is a Rubegetta man at heart #Also this whole argument is pointless because ITS A DRAGON'S EGG #''Who's the other parent?'' ITS LITERALLY THE DRAGON #(this is all lighthearted btw I just think it's funny and silly some people are getting genuinely heated over this)