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#its so jarring 2 me that i have all of these .. and that they r generally pretty consistent style wise . compared to before at least 😭
lemongogo ¡ 8 months
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< 2023 trgnz
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keeksandgigz ¡ 3 months
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the witch hunt
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eddie munson x witch!reader
part 2 of "the love witch"
Summary: You've been good about keeping your magic a secret from Eddie, much to your dismay, so diligent on hiding your true self. What happens when you leave your potion cabinet unattended, he drinks one of your concoctions and turns himself into stone, leaving you to turn him back, right in front of his eyes?
CW: 5k words, no y/n, reader's nickname is 'witchy' , talk of the occult, wiccan practices, description of r's clothing, but no body description, eddie turns to stone, angsty angst angst but with a happy ending, witchy casts some serious spells in this one, mentions of witchy being depressed, eddie being a lovesick fool
thank u to my lovely @reidsbtch for beta reading I love u I love u I love u
Read part 1 here, Witchyverse masterpost here
feedback is always appreciated!
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You've been good. You've been diligent. You've been following the rules of the coven.
To not share the gift with anyone, a secret kept under oath, hand over the binding of an old spell book, its surface course and rough, centuries of hands- young, old, powerful and weak, all part of the history of how that book came to be.
When you started dating Eddie, you were summoned, warned by your coven to keep the magic away from your human boyfriend, hidden under a veil of thin shame disguised as indifference.
And six months went by, then a year. You thought you were safe, you thought you'd gotten through the worst part of keeping the secret.
You deluded yourself. He loves you so much, there's no reason he would leave you, not even for a secret as big as yours. You've put protection spells around everything that involved actual magic in your house, the potion cabinet you kept in the hallways as decoration, the spell books hidden under a floorboard in your room.
Although he could not feel it, your apartment pulsated with raw magical energy in its purest form. You really thought you were safe.
A rainy November afternoon, you're tasked to bring some ingredients you've had stashed at your apartment to your aunt Hilda's house, a delivery from Janice- ingredients from Bulgaria, after your shift.
What surprises you about your aunt Hilda is that despite being a witch, she does not go unnoticed- living in one of the Painted Ladies house in the heart of San Francisco, all by herself and her cat, Arsenio.
She always invites you in for tea and a reading, so you step into her house, smelling of antique parchment, tea leaves and a mystical smell of pungent resin and wood, much different from your incense and dried flowers smell.
"I need to invite Janice over one of these days" she says in her veiled voice, pouring you a cup of jasmine tea.
"I don't know if she's going to be able to get out of Haight Ashbury, Aunt Hilda. She's like two- hundred years old or something" you laugh, rummaging through your bag for the delivery you visited your aunt for, placing the jars on the table.
She gasps in delight "You can't get those plants anywhere else, she must have paid a fortune for that blood from a vampire's fangs" she squeals, running to her cabinet to find a home for her new deliveries.
"How's your human, dear?" she asks from the kitchen, followed by clattering of glass and metal.
"Oh, Eddie's fine, he should be off work soon, maybe we'll do something after" you shrug, petting her cat, Arsenio, on your lap.
"And his handsome hunk of an uncle?" you roll your eyes at that.
"God, Aunt Hilda, gross" you groan, sinking in your seat.
"Let me know when he's back in town, I need to invite them both over one of these days, it might be nice. Shall we do a reading before I leave?" she sits back down at the small table and takes a sip of her tea, tarot cards in hand.
"Yeah, I'll ask him for his schedule" you finish your tea "Let me do a one card pull, I need to get home"
"You know, dear, you've been awfully nervous lately- so jumpy" She says, as she shuffles the laminated cards for what feels like forever,
"I'm okay, Aunt Hilda, just stressed with work" you lie, exhaling with anticipation as her wrinkled hand holds the deck. Your aunt's readings have always made you nervous.
You'd been jumpy for a while, the thought of Eddie finding out had been making you nervous, but you wouldn't dare to tell your aunt that.
She offers the deck to you, you pick a card and then give it to her. A gasp escapes her upon looking at it.
A panic rises through your body "What? What is it?" you ask, your bag already across your shoulder, holding on to its strap.
"The Tower" she mutters, destruction, unexpected change, awakening.
A shiver runs down your spine, one by one your vertebrae straighten "I just had a really bad feeling, dear. I would check in on your human boy" she places a hand on her temple, heart racing as you bolt out of your seat and leave.
On the train, panic settles in, wondering if Eddie was somehow connected to this.
A call startles you. It's him.
You tremble when nearing the phone to your ear.
"Hey, witchy, I'm at your house- I used the spare key. I just called 'cause I had a question" he says, voice dubious and vague.
"What is it, Ed? I'm on my way home"
"I was just wondering if it's normal that the cabinet in your hallway is open? I had to stop Circe from getting into it a couple times" you hear a meowing in the background, he must be holding her.
"What cabinet?" you feel your chest rise and fall at an incredibly fast pace.
"The one with the wilted flowers on them, it has a bunch of bottles. Are- are these fake potions?" There's an amused lilt in his voice, almost as if he's laughing at you. Fuck. The potion cabinet.
"Eddie don't touch anything, I'm literally here" your alarmed tone freaks him out, but he has no time to say anything as you hang up and enter your apartment building.
You run up the stairs, heart in your throat, as you reach your front door and slam it open. Eddie's head swings violently.
"Hey, witchy, what's wrong?" he stands up from the cabinet, holding Circe on one arm. You're heaving, irregular breaths, as you see he's still standing, alive, and breathing.
You close the door. "You didn't touch anything in there, did you?" you run towards the open cabinet, checking for missing bottles.
"Witchy, honey, I don't get why you're so jumpy about a couple of fake potions, they would actually be really useful for DnD" Eddie chuckles, reaching into the cabinet to grab a bottle, observing it up close. A greyish- blue liquid swirls inside the bottle.
"Eddie! Put it back! It's dangerous!" you exclaim as you reach for the bottle, but he's blocking you.
"Baby, I think you might be getting a little too carried away with this witchy stuff. There's no way you should be reacting like this over some water and dye" he swirls the bottle once again "I'll even drink it, show you it's not actually that dangerous"
A smug smile adorns his lips, as you watch helplessly while he uncorks the small vial and downs its content. 
“EDDIE NO” You aren’t even sure what it is, which makes a panic set into your stomach, hoping you could reverse whatever he ingested.
“No, no, no, no, what have you done?” your head encapsulated in your hands, feeling the beady sweat on your hairline, falling to your knees with the realization. You’re going to have to tell him.
“See? Not dangerous, baby. I love you, but you need to do something about this obsession, it’s getting out of hand” he sighs “I’m hungry i’m gonna get some food” but before he can even take a step, the rumbling of stone fills the room. 
You grab the empty glass vial and examine its label. Shit. He turned himself to stone.
In a panic, he looks at you. 
“Witchy, what’s going on?” his eyes dart from you to his frozen legs, the stone spreading itself upward quickly “Witch-what- is that stone?” He goes still after that.
A statue. His cold, grey eyes staring up at you in a panic. 
Tears brimming your eyes at the sudden realization that once you turn him back to normal he’s going to know. 
His hands feel cold at the touch as you cling on to your boyfriend’s statued form. Mouth agape, eyebrows pinched in fear, it hurt you to see him like this. You were going to lose it all because of a dumb mistake.
A desperate scream bubbles inside your chest as you hold yourself flush against Eddie’s cold surface, wishing his arms could hug you back, having to come to terms with the fact that this is probably the last time you’ll ever see him in your home. You won’t ever get to hold him again.
Weak and teary- eyed you reach for your phone, wiping under your eyes as you try to stabilize yourself. 
“Hello, dear?” aunt Hilda says through the phone. 
“Aunt Hilda I made a really terrible mistake” you sob, shoulders shaking with the violence of your hiccups. 
“What’s wrong? What happened?” the concern is palpable through her voice. 
“I left- left my potion cabinet open and Eddie-” another string of violent sobs follow, rumbled deep in your chest, shaking you to your very core. 
“What happened to Eddie?” The question is cautious, though unfortunately you could feel the alarm and sternness in her voice.
“He turned to stone” you sigh, exasperated, letting yourself sink into the sofa. 
“Stone? How did a human man turn to stone?” ever the help, your aunt exclaims. 
A dramatic exhale you feel like you’ve been holding onto “I left my potion cabinet open and he- and he has a spare key” you sob- all your fault for letting your guard down, all your fault for letting yourself care for him so mindlessly. 
“He got into it thinking they were all fake, I tried to- to stop him” a siffle stops you “he was trying to be funny” a string of sobs followed, unable to speak any longer. 
“You need to pull yourself together,” Hilda says, amidst your inconsolable sobs “you know how to reverse this” her voice is stern, yet shaky, she feels for you, having to let your love go. 
“The mirror” you mumble. 
“That’s right, get a mirror- circle of reflection, circle of protection” she reminds you “repeat those words, he’ll be okay, dear” you can tell that she is hurting, breaking the law of your coven, making you face consequences you haven't even thought of.  
Would you be losing your power? Would you have to move away from him? In hindsight that would be a blessing, as you doubt he would want to stay, now that your secret is uncovered. 
Hilda hangs up the phone as you scramble to get a mirror, and smear salt over his heart. Trying to reverse the spell that might have broken it. 
The mirror faces your boyfriend, his features grey and scared- the last time you’ll ever see him in this lifetime.
Circle of reflection, circle of protection
Circle of reflection, circle of protection
Circle of reflection, circle of protection
The hand that is not holding the mirror is clutched on tightly to his chest, as you keep repeating the words. 
The sound of rubble breaking makes your heart wrench, selfishly wanting him to stay a statue for a little longer, so you won’t have to say goodbye to him just yet, but the stone armor sheds, and his eyes are brown instead of dull and grey, and his arms move, as well as his mouth, closing in itself, breathing as if he’s come to life for the first time. 
He rubs his eyes first, drowsy, like waking up from a one- hundred year old slumber. He looks around the room, it’s familiar to him, the smell of incense that was there, and then it wasn’t, blocked by the earthy smell of rubble and earth. 
“What happened?” he mumbles, shaking his stiff limbs, kicking the broken suit of stone armor at his feet, your hand still on his heart “Witchy?” 
His eyes are blown wide, memories of what had happened an hour before coming to the surface. The same panicked look adorns his face. 
“The potion- it wasn’t” he begins, as you move your hand off of his body, much to your heart’s dismay. You shake your head. 
“It wasn’t fake. None of them are fake” you mutter, staring at the floor, not even daring to look at him. There’s a quiet tension, an almost awkward silence, charged with pain and heartbreak, as Eddie realizes what you mean by ‘not fake.’
“And you brought me back from whatever I turned into” he breathes.
You just nod, head fixated on the floorboards and the rubble surrounding his feet.
“Does that make you-” he gulps. Can’t even bring himself to say it. 
“A witch” you mumble under your breath “a real one,” your gaze falls on his eyes, dilated and sad, as his eyebrows curve up, a line forming on the bridge of his nose. 
There’s once again an unsettling quiet between you two, as he tries to wrap his head around the news. 
His chest feels hollow, where your hand had been just moments before, an unrecognizable phantom pressing down on his heart, rubbing salt in a gashing wound, hoping it would ameliorate it, only to make it bleed more.
He takes a few steps back, watching his step over the rubble, breaking his silence after what feels like hours. 
“Why didn’t you tell me this?” it’s a mere mumble, but the question was clear, hurt, and a little scared, maybe. 
“I swore under oath that I would keep it a secret” you purse your lips, taking a step forward. Your heart shatters when he takes a step back.
His chest is stilled, breath caught in his throat, hands at his sides as he scoffs. 
“You swore you’d keep it a secret? Is that why you’ve been so jumpy lately? You knew I was bound to find out and you didn’t tell me?” his head is reeling, betrayal cuts through him like a knife as more and more of looking at you twists the dagger in his chest. 
“I didn’t want you to find out, Ed. I promised to my coven-” 
“Your coven?  There’s more of you?” you can’t do anything else but swallow on the knot in your throat, scratching and engorging with every word that comes out of Eddie’s mouth, and nod. 
“And you let me drink the potion, God knows what it could have been” he trembles, a shaky breath escapes him. 
“I tried to stop you, Eddie!” you reach for him, hanging on the feeble hope he’ll realize that you have never meant to hurt him in the first place. 
“And- and what if you spelled me, huh? What if you spelled me to make me fall in love with you? Is my love for you not real?” that hurt you more than anything else he could have said, tears brimming your eyes, escaping from their confinement as they streak down your cheeks. 
“I’ve never used my magic on you,” you admit, voice thick with salty tears “my love for you is real, as yours is. I never tampered with your heart, it’s not who I am” bottom lip jutted out and trembling, feeling on the teetering edge of the end.
“I don’t know who you are” a stab to the heart would have hurt less. “You’ve been lying to me for the past year about who you are. No wonder I was so in love with you, you made me fall in love with a person that doesn’t exist, you spelled me!” he’s trembling, you can see it in the way that his fists are balled up– something he does to stabilize himself whenever he’s upset. 
And now he’s upset because of you. 
“Eddie–” you take a step forward, he takes a step back. 
“No. Don’t- don’t come closer.” tears well at the bottom of your lash line, as you watch him turn away, leave and close the door behind him. Words trapped at the bottom of your throat. Words you’ll never get to say again. 
You’re not sure how long you stand there, staring at the doorknob, hoping that it might turn, revealing Eddie once again, ready for you to explain everything to him. 
But the doorknob doesn’t turn, the door doesn’t open, and Eddie doesn’t come back. 
You refuse to sweep the rubble from the last time he was in your apartment, hoping that the smell of him stuck to the cold stone, but there’s nothing left of him in your space. 
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The thing about love witches is that when the thing most precious to them, their hearts, break,  the life force of their power fades. 
So within a short span of days, you notice yourself being weakened. Simple spells become a hard feat, as you can barely make things levitate, sitting in the darkness of your room. 
Days begin to merge into themselves, as you get yourself to work, then home, then work, then home. A repeating cycle you don’t intend to stop. You leave around the back side of the store, to not let Eddie see you while he’s on his smoke break, blending into the crowded streets of what once seemed like the best place in the world.
Your aunt Hilda doesn’t hear from you, and neither does anyone else. You fall off the face of the earth, hoping that your hours never coincide with Eddie’s. 
But you can feel it from next door, the pain and hurt that radiates from the record store. You feel it in the way he speaks to customers, in the way he sighs as he gets off his smoke break. 
You hear him ask Janice about you, she tells him that she doesn’t know, that she hasn’t seen you in a while. Respecting your wishes to let him live his life in peace. 
But he wasn’t living his life in peace. In fact, Eddie was miserable. 
He was miserable in the way that everything reminded him of you, in the way that if he stepped too close to your store (to make sure you were working that day), he’d smell the rose incense you’d light at your house. The one he would smell on your clothes. 
The crystals that sat on his windowsill were now tightly packed and shoved away on a far up shelf that he would not be reminded of you. He burned every trace of you, the taste of betrayal bitter in his throat as he sat on his couch every night, always on the left side, because you sat on the right. A place for you was always carved in his mind, whether it was unconscious or intentional. 
 The smell of your shampoo lingers in the pink bottles in his shower, in the silk pillow you always slept on when you went over to his house. A silk shirt you left on his bed, gingerly placed on his pillow as he lets your smell engulf him. That’s the only way he can sleep. 
There’s a fear deeply setting in, that he might just never be able to get over you. Despite the lies and the secrets, he will never be able to not think about you, not when the smell of rose incense or the color pink exist, not when long skirts and crystals and tarot cards and brocade rugs exist. Not when you exist. Not when you keep walking the earth, sadness seeping in every crevice and every crack of his walls.
He knows he can’t go on like this. Not while you roam the same streets he roams, waiting for you to turn around. Look at me, witchy, look at me. 
And you’re so sad. He can see it in your eyes, in the way you don’t carry yourself like you used to– shoulders slouched, dressed in black like you’re mourning the loss of your heart. Mourning the loss of your love.
He debates going back to Hawkins for a bit. Going back to live with his uncle– leave this new world behind, just until the air has been purified of you. Until he’s no longer thinking about the witchy girl who haunts his dreams at night. Go work where his friend Steve works at, shitty, dead- end job, just for a bit. 
Confine himself to the life of a hermit, just so he can allow you to live in peace. 
So he goes back to Hawkins, under the guise of going home for the holidays. He picks up whatever jobs his uncle can’t do anymore because of his age, driving the beat up yellow pick- up truck in and out of town. 
“I never thought I’d see the day Munson would come crawling back” he’d hear a couple of people say on the street. He’s never gone unnoticed, but now more so than before– integrated in the San Francisco scene, he did anything but blend in. And he swears he sees you a few times, walking around downtown Hawkins, your hair, your clothes, your bag. Prancing around like your life is back to normal. 
Could it have been a spell? Did you spell him to not make him forget about you? 
But he knows it isn’t like you. Not malicious, not even as a witch, he assumes. 
He keeps himself up at night thinking about you. You’d never use magic on him. With a sound mind, he tells himself that’s true. Your love for him is real. Is his love for you real? Shivering in the freezing temperature of his uncle’s trailer he’d ponder whether what you had was real or not. 
Real.
He drives himself crazy, the thought of you plaguing his mind. 
Even his uncle grows worried, the purple bags under his nephew’s eyes, all the books on witchcraft Eddie could find at the Hawkins local library sitting on his desk. Staying up to read on anything and everything that could help him.
And when that doesn’t work he goes on his uncle’s shitty wifi he never uses to research anything about witches, about magic, about you.
You don’t sense him anymore. Not through the walls, not in his sardonic laugh. It’s like he’d vanished into thin air. 
You find yourself stepping into the record store after a shift, asking his shitty coworkers what happened to Eddie. 
And you’re so weak. So tired, it is even a feat to be able to make it through one full shift standing up, finding a stool to sit on. You’ve paled, eyes dark and lifeless. 
“He’s gone back home for the holidays” one of the assholes who made fun of you says “left you stranded here all by yourself? Or did he kick you to the curb?” he smirks, and the other idiot laughs. You make a mental note to hex them for good next time. 
If you don’t die first. 
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Eddie comes back to San Francisco after the holidays, and it’s like he’s never left. 
Union Square has taken off the tree and the ice skating rink– he wanted to take you there. He thought you’d be good at ice skating. You’re good at everything. Or maybe it’s because you’re magic. 
The restaurant you went to on your first date has closed down. There’s a smile creeping on his face as he remembers you laughing because he couldn’t eat with chopsticks. He misses hearing you laugh. He misses seeing you smile. 
The tiny twinkle, the stars in your eyes. The way he’d braid your hair at night. Petting Circe, nestled in between you two in your bed. 
He sees you for the first time since he’s been back on the porch of your shop. His heart shrinks at the sight of you. Eyes sunken in, buried in layers and layers of woolen fabric, staring blankly at the street in front of you. 
The thing about love witches is that when the thing most precious to them, their hearts, break,  the life force of their power fades. 
He remembers reading that in an old looking book during the holidays. He wrote it down in his notebook. 
A love witch. Thrives on being loved and being in love.  
Her heart is only safe when her love is true and unfettered. 
He sees it now.
He shows up to your house after talking himself into it for a week, with the excuse of returning a shirt. The same silk  shirt he’d been sleeping on top of since he left you. He had it washed for you. It doesn’t smell like you anymore.
He knocks. Is it him or are his hands always that sweaty? Is his heart beating at a normal pace? Is his hair okay? And his breath? Oh shit, he has a zit on his chin.
“Go away Aunt Hilda!” he hears you say, grumpy and grouchy. The veiled sadness in your voice creates a rift between him and the door. 
So he knocks. Again. And Again. 
“Aunt Hilda I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this, I don’t want– Eddie” A breath gets trapped in your diaphragm, feeling your heart start picking up its pace for the first time in what felt like weeks. 
“Hi” he gives you a tight smile, the silk balled up in a fist, purple with little black swirls on it. 
“Hi, um, I– what are you doing here? Do you wanna come in?” you slither like a worm, that’s how you feel. The boy you’ve been pining and crying and suffering for is here. Right in front of you. 
You look so much more frail than he’d remembered “I uh–” he holds up the fabric “you left this at my house” 
“Oh, thanks. That’s sweet of you” Your heart drops, you really thought he was going to make amends with you?
You extend your arm, so he can give the shirt to you. So he can be on his way and be gone forever. 
Hands, fingers, knuckles. He misses holding your hand. 
“I heard you went home for the holidays, how was that?” you lean on the doorframe, hands crossed on your chest. 
“It was good, I just spent it with my uncle. He told me to tell you happy new year, uh— even though we’re not—” he shouldn’t have said the last part, he sees you sink into yourself, gazing down at the hardwood floor. His stomach twists. 
“What did you do for the holidays?” he asks. He doesn’t want it to be over, not yet. 
“I just stayed in, I’ve been pretty sick lately, flu season in full swing. I’ve just been—”
“Your heart’s broken, isn’t it? That’s why you’ve been so sick?” your heart drops. How does he know all this? 
He reads your puzzled expression “I um— did some research. That’s what I did most of my holidays.  I just wanted to understand. I know you didn’t spell me, or whatever. You’re a love witch” he takes out a piece of paper, highlighted is a sentence, in light pink.
Her heart is only safe when her love is true and unfettered. 
Your head is reeling, he hasn’t stopped thinking about you. He spent his holidays researching you, your kind. He knows you didn’t lie to him. 
Tears begin to spill onto the old parchment, the tears you haven’t shed in the past two months resurfacing, as you violently jerk and sob in front of him. You missed him.
Eddie quickly steps into your apartment and closes the door, enveloping you in a hug. And it feels good for your heart, a soothing balm for all the cracks and wounds it’s suffered. 
“It’s okay, witchy, you can let it out” he says, as you continue to sob on his shoulder. Soft shushing sounds as he caresses your hair “Shhh…shhh… I’ve got you” and it’s like he’s never left. 
“I’m here now, I’m not leaving” his assurance makes your body feel whole again. He sits you both down on the couch. 
“Witchy, I didn’t stop thinking about you for a second. I would see you everywhere, I thought I was going crazy” he begins, and maybe he sees a twinkle in your eye, something weak, almost like a heartbeat being revived. 
“I thought going to Hawkins, just to distance myself would change things. But I’d keep myself awake thinking about you, all the time, wondering if you were doing okay.” His hand brushes yours, as you wipe your tears with the sleeve of your sweater. 
“I would see you at work, or out and about and you looked so sad. And I just couldn’t explain to myself what happened to you, until I came across that book” he finishes.
And in turn, you don’t say anything, you just kiss him. It’s wet and messy with the tears and the saliva, but he immediately kisses you back, cradling your face in his hand. Your heart beats faster than it has in a while, and it’s like magically, your skin has a bit more color to it. 
And Eddie sees the stars in your eyes again. 
When you detach you just lay your head on his chest. You listen for his heartbeat, lulling you into a deep sleep, the best sleep you’ve had in two months. He follows you not soon after, Circe on his lap, as he falls into slumber with a peaceful smile on his face. 
Once awoken from your sleep, you go make a cup of tea for the both of you.
“Witchy?” your head lifts at the nickname as you pour him his tea.
 “So, are you a witch, a mage or a sorceress?” 
You just roll your eyes and kiss him again. 
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theoddest1 ¡ 3 months
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Hazbin Hotel episode 5 is a rushed mess.
May just make this a continual thing where I review the episodes from here on out.
-Right off the bat, the pacing for this episode is probably the worst out of all other episodes so far. Things just begin abruptly (Lucifer's first song with Al for instance), no build up, 5 months have passed in only 5 episodes of barely any progress or focus on Charlie as a character, a random character that didn't need to be introduced but was anyway ruined the flow further, and this stupid ass rivalry all on the basis of who's the "better dad" is legit the most random conflict of any conflict so far. That will get a point all on its own along with some of the other things mentioned. The pacing left no real breathing room aside from 2 moments: Al's rise to power and Husk n Al's convo. I wanna say the second song would be a 3rd but it just resolves an issue that was present for seemingly years and pulled a "Stolas" with having a song or sob story as an excuse for the lack of effort to reach out and be a better dad. Lazy writing and pacing overall.
-5 months....5 months have passed with barely anything revolving around helping sinners or trust built around the main cast SHOWN ON SCREEN. We are told important information opposed to witnessing the progress itself. This is not only lazy but extremely jarring cause it feels as though episodes were skipped and bonds feel unearned. They get easily resolved in what feels like seconds, and we're just supposed to....deal with it. Angel and Husk barely interact throughout this episode, which, after the crazy ride they had, with the knowledge of a SEVERAL MONTHS passing by as well, you'd think Angel would be shown to be more chatty with him....which he doesn't. Nothing crazy, just small bits of them interacting and enjoying each other's company. Nah. We get that next episode, and even THAT'S lacking. I'll tackle that in a separate post. But yeah, 5 months, and we have yet to see the other guests' views and how it has changed for the better or the process of them realizing WHY they would go for redemption. How that has affected them. Nothing of note has come about from any of these. No other sinners have joined. No other demons seem interested in Charlie's Hotel. Nothing. We are told things have been done, yet it feels like we are still at the starting line, or well, a foot away from it and miles away from the finish.
- Lucifer is a joke. I don't mind me a goofy threat, it adds a charm to them but also shows that they take so little seriously due to their immense power....not Lucifer. No, that guy just....is a joke. Dude is in his mansion making fucking toy ducks for some reason and just has depression (show said it outright, not even depression is spared from "tell don't show")
He does literally nothing, doesn't seem to WANT to do anything, and no one respects the guy. Nearly all in the Hotel lack fear, intimidation, or admiration for the guy (Pentious is the only one who seems to exhibit admiration of some kind). The closest we got is being uncomfortable. That's it. Then there's his scuffle with Alastor. Tell me why he feels the need to argue with this sucka again? Cause last I checked, Alastor is a mere overlord, and Lucifer is The Devil. Wtf is this randomass rivalry that just...S T A R T S? Why does Lucifer get intimidated or moved by Al? It makes no sense. Lucifer has been alive far longer than humanity itself, but nah this random fuck who looks like he robbed a blood bank got him weeping insecurities? I'm supposed to take this sad excuse of a character seriously? How many of these carbon copy characters will Viv make until I finally end my suffering???
-Wtf is Alastor's deal? Why is he so pressed and annoyed? One moment he is as cool and collected as a cucumber and showing only SLIGHT annoyance (Vox and His song), then he goes to meetings and speaks with people far older, far more experienced, and/or far stronger than he show no interest and he gets pissy? How insecure is he that people not caring where he's gone or thinking his ideas are wack is what leads to his eye twitching and him throwing a random ass cuss. Seriously, THAT'S what got him to swear? That his idea for the hotel's name is stupid? BFFR! You can not be serious right now, THAT'S what gets him going? You'd think with how witty and chill he was in the pilot, he would find a quick and a effective smart-ass comeback, not essentially bitch at The Devil. This makes Alastor look like a thin-skinned wannabe, too cause these minor ass comebacks are why he has lost his edge along with some randomass song number?? And at the end of the day, Al just couldn't be damned anymore to even care by the end of the episode, he doesn't speak with Lucifer or give any stank looks, doesn't speak with Charlie, does NOTHING pertaining to the issues prior, nah, he just stands there and watches after telling Mimzy to go away. Some say he did this to simply piss Lucifer off, but that doesn't make sense (not saying it ain't true, just saying if it is, it's nonsensical). First off, if that were the case, why was he annoyed even BEFORE seeing the guy?
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If he only wanted to get a rise, why is HE getting angry? Trolls usually don't care enough to be this pissed. Second, wtf would he even gain from doing this? What to help push Lucifer to be a better father to Charlie, request by Lilith to Al so that Lucifer can get his act together?? If so, that's the LAZIEST shit I have ever heard. Lucifer is such a joke, he needed a SINNER to get him back on track....
Regardless, this whole father shit by Al comes out of nowhere and ruins the goddamn flow of the episode. Prior to it all, Al has shown NO interest in anyone and has done jack shit. Wtf does he even do? He's done ONE thing so far and that was help for the commercial. Alastor has shown to be completely useless as of now.
-Charlie, why is she treated as tho she isn't a grown ass woman? She's babied to hell and back and despite being the daughter of Lucifer, hasn't shown any of her abilities to help the hotel. So Lucifer can summon shit but not her? Is she that useless? Also, gotta love how she never asks her dad about the Valentino situation to help Angel out. Man...what a great ass friend. She also doesn't find it weird that Al is just suddenly...babying her? She has zero awareness of everything, I guess, which is getting annoying now. You're over 200 years of age (went to high school in the 1800s according to what her comic was about, but guess that's retconned based on what happens in the following episode).
So she doesn't use her abilities to tidy up the place, she doesn't act her damn age, she doesn't do anything to help her sexually assaulted friend. What a damn joke, just like her dad.
-Mimzy shouldn't have been in an episode about Lucifer. Plain and simple. Her character should have been introduced in one of the earlier episodes. Not during fucking this. And we got a repeat of the pilot with Alastor's backstory retold. So they're down to retell his rise to power but not to make at least a proper recap of the events that happened prior? Key word....PROPER.
-Husk caring about Mimzy bringing trouble is actually fucking stupid. Because of the lack of proper build up to him now finding more reason to like the Hotel, it feels forced that he would be worried about what danger Mimzy brought. And on top of that, yeah...ALASTOR IS RIGHT THERE. You know who else is there? LUCIFER. I get it, Lucifer stood by and watched as the Hotel was being swatted, but he also sang a song about providing what Charlie asked for, meaning if she had asked her dad, he woukd be down to help, so WHY TF IS HE WORRIED???? Also , is Charlie just INCAPABLE of fighting for herself?? "She doesn'twanna hurt sinners-" so she had no defensive abilities??? What???? Also, that's a damn lie, she fought Katie Killjoy on live Tv. Are no other damn people capable of protecting the Hotel??? Why did Al need to step in for that? They were just LOAN SHARKS.
Anyway, the scene where Husk is probing Alastor about Mimzy and treating him as a pet is decently paced and the tone was pretty neat, sucks that this feels like their way of showing that Husk is also under a leash like Angel rather than him being treated as a joke, which btw...horrid way to compare the two. Wanna know why? One is subjected to an onslaught of sexual assault whether he was pushing Val's buttons or not, and forced to be assaulted by various men around him, passed around like a thing. The other is Husk, who legit disrespected Alastor and had to push at him to get such humiliation and terror, and guess what....Al still ended up pushing Mimzy away after she did end up bringing trouble, so he did essentially listen to Husk in his own distant way. This is the ONLY TIME we see Al be downright mean to Husk and probably the only time. Angel has been subjected to nothing but horrid assault after assault no matter the situation. So I better not see anyone say, "SEE LOOK, THEY'RE BOTH ABUSED" stfu. Nothing about their situations are even remotely similar. Just cause the chains are the same doesn't mean the users are. EDIT: Ima say this before people act like I excuse this. No, I am not excusing Alastor's actions. I am pointing out what happened on screen. Husk mocked Alastor, Alastor retaliated out of anger(much like how Angel retaliated at Husk in ep 4 after Husk kept arguing and mocking him) by pulling out the chains to shut him up. He didn't even hit Husk. Again, I'm not excusing it, just pointing out how vastly different Husk and Angel's situations are and how one overlord reacts compared to the other....who is a straight-up rapist.
-Both the songs are mid/ok but pulled down by the awful storytelling....shame. I at first was not fond of Lucifer's voice.....it's ok now, I guess. Idk. I'm still not really feeling it, though.
Episode sucked ass
Pacing was all over the place
ALASTOR AND LUCIFER ARE PISS BABIES
219 notes ¡ View notes
robsheridan ¡ 1 year
Text
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Poster for the unproduced 1984 live-action horror adaptation GARFIELD: FIRST BLOOD.
Following the success of CUJO in 1983, studios were scrambling to find the next hit “killer pet” flick. Notorious grindhouse auteur Ron Sharleton, seeking a big-budget movie deal to fund his struggling production of CANNIBAL QUARTERBACK 2, set his sights on the most unlikely of properties: Jim Davis’ beloved comic strip Garfield. Sharleton, a self-proclaimed fan of Garfield who called the strip “a subversive celebration of misanthropy,” believed an “alternative, adult” spin on the character could thrive in tandem with its kid-friendly cartoons. Describing his rationale in an interview later, Sharleton said: “You have all of these R-rated films that come out and become big hits and the studios want to suck every penny out of one idea, so they sanitize it and repackage it as a cartoon for kids. So I said, why can’t we do the reverse?”
GARFIELD: FIRST BLOOD was pitched as a dark, gritty reimagining in which the titular cat, pushed to the brink on a particularly bad Monday, finally snaps and kills Jon’s dimwitted dog Odie. As he tastes Odie’s blood, Garfield is overcome by how good it felt to put a permanent end to something that annoyed him. He then realizes that everything and everyone annoy him, and his murderous rampage begins.
Describing his take on the character, Sharleton said: “Garfield never really sat right with me as a children’s character. He’s so much darker, more complex. You have this cat who is filled with contempt; he looks at the world around him with radical skepticism and scowls at the prison of tedium mankind calls ‘society,’ and he responds with this very self-indulgent nihilism: Be lazy, be a glutton, don’t participate in anything because it’s all bullshit. Garfield looks at Jon waking up early on a Monday and putting on his tie to go to a job he hates, and he sees a pathetic fool. It’s all such a powerful rejection of the Reagan Wall Street capitalist disease that has poisoned the 80s. ‘Work hard, climb the ladder, buy a boat!’ Garfield says fuck that, stay home, eat lasagna, accept no master. But living as an iconoclast in a conformist world has filled him with all this tension. There’s anger in there, you know? So I wanted to examine what would happen if Garfield was finally pushed over the edge. Where’s the line between a passive nihilist and a violent anarchist?”
Warner Bros execs were intrigued by Sharleton’s pitch (and the lucrative cash cow of the Garfield brand) and funded a short “proof-of-concept” trailer, directed by Sharleton, to convince Garfield creator Jim Davis of the idea. The trailer reportedly went “all-in” on Sharleton’s signature “splattercore” horror, including a scene where Garfield grinds up Liz Wilson alive in a meat grinder and bakes her flesh into a lasagna he then serves to Jon. The presentation to Davis was described as “one of the most disastrously miscalculated meetings in modern Hollywood,” with Davis stopping the trailer midway to ask the room “are you people completely fucking insane?” before storming out.
Reflecting on the meeting years later, an anonymous former Warner exec said “we knew it was a long shot, but we really felt like the only way to sell the concept was to push it as far as possible. In retrospect I think yeah, we did let it go too far. We were so absorbed in it that we didn’t realize how jarring it would be for a guy like Jim Davis to just be thrown into this cold. I think it was a mistake to open with the Nermal blender scene, but we wanted shock, and we thought… I don’t know, everyone was doing a LOT of cocaine back then. Well, everyone except Jim Davis."
-----------
UPDATE: T-shirts and poster prints now available!
NOTE: This alternate reality horror story is part of my NightmAIres narrative art series. NightmAIres are windows into other worlds and alternate histories, conceived/written by me and visualized with synthography and Photoshop.
If you enjoy my work, consider supporting me on Patreon for frequent exclusive hi-res wallpaper packs, behind-the-scenes features, downloads, events, contests, and an awesome fan community. Direct fan support is what keeps me going as an independent creator, and it means the world to me.
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deepdrownlamentt ¡ 3 months
Note
Hello feeshcule ehehehehe may i ask for how headcanons on how tequila and flamebringer are like when it comes to hand-holding (separately) ? thank you very much in advance (-> sry I'm insufferable when it comes to these two🐥)
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↬ flamebringer & tequila handholding hcs
content warnings:
note: feeshcule... yue i think you're trying to kill me :/ what happened to mercy... forgiveness... everyone is so mean 2 me........... anyways here r ur welfare guard boys!!! its a little short . i couldnt think of what more to write . but i hope u enjoy :)
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↬FLAMEBRINGER's hands are just about as rough and calloused as you might expect, from years of wielding a sword and doing work in the gardens. and while sometimes it might seem like he's just as gruff when it comes to you, the fact that that's not necessarily the case isn't exactly something he's going to start spouting out of nowhere.
↬ he has a habit of holding onto your wrist, your upper arm. he's not quite one for pda, but it suffices for the meantime — he gets to sate any desires you might have to hold his hand, and he also gets to... you know, hold your hand.
↬ in private, he much prefers pressing his palm flat against yours to feel every groove, callus, and scar on your skin, and you on his. he's satisfied with just that much, no need for any grand shows or gifts, or even rubbing circles into your hand with a thumb. all he wants is the feeling of your palm flush against his, your fingers curling down to hold his hand closer to yours.
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↬ to say that TEQUILA is a little on the handsier side is just a little bit of an understatement. he seems the type to love having a hand on you at all times, whether he's got an arm around your shoulders or a hand on your waist.
↬ he's rather casual with his (physical) affections for you, too. so long as you're comfortable with it, he'll be reaching out to grab your hand while asking you about your day, when he comes up to greet you while you're busy, while teasing you for not being able to force a jar open...
↬ tequila loves the feeling of your fingers tangled together. he has a habit of doing it whenever you hold hands — linking your pinkies, weaving his index over your middle, his thumb brushing gently over the side of your palm. it makes him feel like you've made some sort of secure, tender knot... and if you have to let go? no worries, he'll just come find you later; surely you can spare him a hand then, too.
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craacked-splatters ¡ 3 months
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"I know"
"Do u want to see what I added today?"
"Sure buddy"
(insane rambling below!)
Scrapbooks! Scrapbooks! Hell yeah!!
Hello to the 5 ppl seeing this👋 Ima be real Im running on 7 hours of sleep after 5day grind brain mushy rn and I scribbled everything maniacally by memory at 3am after having one of those revelation moments so I have no idea what I'm missing lmao. This is actually the first time drawing them like this 2. Really proud of it
and B4 u ask anything hear me out.
So like tmnt2012 mutant apocalypse am I right?
Yeah it's flawed and pacings off and stuff BUT! The implications it left behind are haunting and it has been stuck in my brain for years. One of the things that stuck with me was the fact that Raph and Don had stuff like April's tessen, Mikey's stuffed bear head, The Creeps containment jar, and Casey's skull(horrifying btw) with them and that it's like :((
I fully believe it was Donnie who collected and carried them everywhere in their car. Not only for Raph(to help with this memory)but also for himself.
Why? Well maybe I'm reading 2 much into it and it's also partly a HC of mine but also bc canonically Donnie has a bit of a hoarding habit collecting trinkets and pictures and stuff. He likes to keep things around that hold a lot of significant value to him.
We see this in The Creeping Doom during the intro
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AND I swear he's got a literal wall of family photos in his lab somewhere I can't for the life of me find it but I know he did! He even took some to the farmhouse with him when they escaped during the invasion.
They're memories yk? Reminders..
Ok im having difficulty expressing this shit rn words r failing so like give me ur brain 4 a sec.
Imagine ur donbot.
You're stuck in a cold metal limbo for the rest of ur last remaining family members life. Everything and everyone you knew and cared about is dead and gone. Over thousands of species and ecosystems that made ur world unique wiped out. No more animals no more wild things no more blue clear skys. Death can't come for you. Not in a way that matters anymore.
And no matter where u go you are haunted by shadows of what once was. There are so many echoes and ghosts and cultures and stories and lives that were buried & left to rot by the gaping maws of fear & the desperate need to survive. No one cares for the past and the only other person around you can't remember it. Time will claim its domain again and there will be nothing left except empty metal husks to show sentience even existed in the first place.
Like holy shit he was just a kid bro and he never got the chance to even reach full adulthood!!! I can't possibly imagine the grief and guilt he must've carried with him all those years. He lost EVERYTHING
His family. His home. His world.
Did Donnie even get the chance to mourn??? Do u think his new body allowed it? Do u think he even ALLOWED himself to mourn? He had a hurt amnesiac brother who still needed to eat, who could still starve and bleed and die if they weren't careful enough.
So between his habits and the ✨Angst✨ and human pollution, him hoarding random ass things Wall-E style and making these shitty little scrapbooks or keepsakes didn't seem so far fetched to me. I also highly doubt there was enough time or resources to build shrines or graves in the middle of apocalypse. But yk honoring/preserving the memories of the things and ppl we love is natural for us so like SORRY if its a bit cringe of me wanting him to have SOMETHING to comfort him during the really bad days.
Even if its more bitter than sweet
Bonus doodads cuz I was indecisive:
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The 1st was purple tinted cuz of donbot vision get it hehehe
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legodamianwayne ¡ 8 months
Text
BATMAN AND ROBIN 2023 #1 (Take 6 (yes))
(im not writing this as i go since ive already read the issue before. ill also be mentioning gotham war since this takes place during it (just a warning for spoilers!))
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i just noticed the bat and robin on the cover! so cute
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OH........(just noticed this too) that doesn't look good
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look at them goofing off n having fun
this is cute but the way bruce acts here and in gotham war is so jarring its kinda funny
bruce in batman #137: can't stand my fake ass family
bruce in b&r: me and my son damian 🤗
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bruce is in his "local dilf in the area" era rn
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damian having talia's mannerism that bruce noticed is so <3
and here its confirmed that this takes place during gotham war. not sure how to feel about that
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STILL INSANE OVER THIS baby first self insert fanfic
damian went from drawing hyper realistic gore vent art to anime eyes in the corner
i think it'd be fun if we see damian write more as the story goes on. like him daydreaming n doodling in class
wonder if theres any meaning with damian putting talia as a hero n bruce as a criminal here...or maybe its just a "totally original character do not steal" thing
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you dont say bruce 🙄
"the last few years"?? pretty sure the events shown there all happened not even in 2 years since damian turned 14 around the start of the lazarus tournament
also why are alfred n talia not shown there? alfred's death has huge impact on damian (he literally hallucinated him) n talia was there as much as ra's
i dont like how damian looks here but that white connor should be a crime
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"thats enough emotions for tonight father" [slams door]
i wonder why damian is staying with bruce tho (outside of making this book exist) didn't bruce n talia had a custody battle moment™ n damian's like "nah i have my own life (is literally 14)"
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HELL YEAH MY BOY CAN COOK
he's quoting alfred ohhh im gonna sob
this is kinda embarrassing for bruce...like ur son is finally living with you again n he's the one up early cooking?? sir u better step up
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aw he's making tea the way alfred did
*squints* did bruce get his hand back? thats a pretty normal looking hand to me
did damian's comment on it in batman #137 made bruce think "shit i cant give damian any ideas of getting a robot hand" n he just. magically grow it back
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[GLASS SHATTERING SOUND]
gotham...heights? n. not gotham academy? no maps? no damian joining her dnd team?? no detective club finally hanging out with damian??
ik damian got expelled from gotham academy BUT. WHY
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okay? whats the point if he's not going to the same school that his friend went to?
interesting how damian fantasize for a normal life in robin 2021 (with him liking the mundanity of shoujo manga) n now that bruce is offering him that he's rejecting it (or maybe he just rly don't like school which is. fair enough)
wellll just cuz we're not getting maps n the detective club doesn't mean damian's other friends arent showing up right? RIGHT? (maya plz come home)
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THE ROBIN MOBILEEE it looks so ridiculous i love it
HOLD ON. DOES THIS CAR HAVE NO SEAT BELTS?? BRUCE UR LETTING THIS SLIDE?
ik that thing is rly loud too damian waking up the whole neighborhood here
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not rumors abt the batfam fighting getting spread around?? this is so embarrassing omg
am i the only one getting gotham academy flashbacks here? with killer croc n the trio with the fox shark n bird masks
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they're very comfortable with calling eachother father n son while in suits huh. ig everyone in gotham knows that batman is a dilf (who's beefing with his adult children) now
not much to say abt the rest: bruce got shot with something n now bats are attacking him
end thoughts: i hope with all the focus on animals here means that we're getting damian's pets back soon n that gotham war wont affect this book much since i rly want to see damian interact with his siblings again. also is it just me or does the day scenes looks very bright? saturated? it kinda hurts for me to read idk. the night scenes r pretty tho
next issue is damian's first day on his new school that is not gotham academy but im still excited for it! (coping)
bonus bestie corner
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akihatohnoofficial ¡ 6 months
Note
r/akihaowners
A place for questions and conversations about owning and caring for your Akiha. For photos and videos, check out r/akihas.
14.7k masters | 19 online | Top 5% ranked by size
Posts sorted by hot
===
Topic: [Adopting] Where to Boy Akihas
u/throwaway5318008 posted 3 hours ago:
Hey guys i'm looking to buy an Akiha, but i'm a college student so i don't have a lot of money right now. how cheap can i get one for?
EDIT: BUY I MEANT BUY. FUCK I CAN'T CHANGE THE TITLE.
u/charzardass replied 2 hours ago:
Fellow boy-Akiha enjoyer detected ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) A man of culture, I see.
If you want one for cheap and don't mind buying used, check your local Facebook marketplace or Craigslist. I've been lucky enough to get several for under $50 ea. Happy hunting!
u/pm-me-akiha-titties replied 3 hours ago:
If you're a college student, the cost of buying an Akiha isn't your biggest concern. You'll need to pay for routine veterinary care, clothing, a cane (many cheap Akihas won't be sold with a cane), enrichment (Akihas don't like being left alone! What are you going to do when you're in classes?), and, of course, food? The Akiha Care Guide provides an estimate of monthly expenses for Akiha raising.
| u/throwaway5318008 (OP) replied 2 hours ago:
| Yeah i live in a dorm but its a single so i dont have roommates. And i was thinking she could just hang out in my apartment while im in class? And i can bring back food from the dining hall. So i dont think she really needs clothes or whatever if shes in my room the whole time.
|| u/knightyknight replied 1 hour ago:
|| yeah OP you can ignore that simp. some people love to spoil and coddle their akihas and then warn eeeeeeveryone how expensive they are. well of course they're expensive if you treat them like people.
|| anyways I have a buddy who's an akiha breeder so I get mine for dirt cheap. you can always try to find a breeder in your area and offer to buy the dams off them once they stop being fertile -- they'll usually sell them for next to nothing to clear up space for the next young dams. ===
Topic: [Advice] How to make less noisy?
u/SmolTaterTot posted 7 hours ago:
Hi folks. I recently bought an Akiha, and I love him to pieces! The only problem is... I don't think I was prepared for how noisy they can be. Mine's always meowing and moaning and whining all day and night. I've read the FAQs, so I tried hitting him when he wakes me up in the middle of the night, but he hasn't stopped. Any advice?
u/himejooooooshi replied 5 hours ago:
UNGRATEFUL [huffy face][huffy face] being whiny and needy is an Akiha's charm point
u/ArrowToTheNiichan replied 7 hours ago:
You done goofed. You clearly aren't giving him enough attention since he's crying all the time, so hitting him (i.e. giving him attention) when he wakes you up is just encouraging the behavior. Go back and RTFM again, specifically the part about behavioral conditioning.
But it's true that Akihas tend to be pretty loud no matter what. Some vets can remove the vocal cords for you if it really bothers you that much, but insurance won't cover it. Good luck.
===
Topic: TIFU by getting a "friendly" pair of akihas
u/sirtwixalot posted 12 hours ago:
I read that akihas need attention and get lonely easily, but they can also be intimidated by unfamiliar akihas, so I decided to buy a pair of akihas from the same breeder so that they could keep each other company.
I got them Friday afternoon, and they spent Saturday and Sunday grooming each other and wrestling together. One of them calls the other "nee-san," and the other calls the first one her "puppy." So they seemed to be getting along really well. I wasn't even having the problems with them refusing to bathe or eat that I hear sometimes happens with akihas. So I thought they seemed like really good companions for each other.
Then on Monday.... I went to work and left them at the house.
When I came back... I think I'd be banned if I described what I saw.
Imagine if a jar of mayo exploded all over a bed.
Sooooooo TIFU.
u/himejooooooshi replied 9 hours ago:
No problem detected... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
u/SmolTaterTot replied 10 hours ago:
DUDE
u/ArrowToTheNiichan replied 11 hours ago:
Does no one actually read the FAQs before they buy one of these things anymore?
u/charzardass replied 11 hours ago:
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO
===
Topic: [Advice] How to beat an Akiha in a one-on-one basketball game?
u/Point_Me_@_The_Sky posted 2 hours ago:
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justdalek ¡ 3 months
Text
Okay, this might just be me not digging deep enough, but I feel like people complain about the musical numbers in Hazbin Hotel coming across as “jarring” without diagnosing the reason why the music is jarring to the viewer.
I have been rewatching the episodes quite a bit, until the realization hit me in episode 6:
There’s no true transitions from background music, to vamps, to the actual song for most of the songs in the series thus far.  And in some instances, there’s no vamps at all.
Let me explain.
A vamp (in terms of musicals) is when there is music that leads up to the musical number that is about to be performed.  For example, in Disney’s 1989 The Little Mermaid, the sequence right before the song “Under the Sea” has the beginning melody of the song play underneath Sebastian’s dialogue of him telling Ariel that going to the surface is a bad idea.  That little music diddly evolves into Under the Sea naturally without hitting the audience from out of left field.  This was popularized by Howard Ashman, who was a pioneer for the revival of Disney and its movie musicals with the Renaissance Era.  The point of the vamps is to introduce the motif of the song fixing to be song, as well as helping to aid in the character’s mounting emotions that lead them into singing.
To quote Ashman, “You have so much emotion that you have to sing it.  Then you have even more emotion that you must dance.”
Keep in mind that Hazbin Hotel is basing its format off of traditional Broadway musicals.  Each 20-minute episode has two songs in it, usually being sung by the protagonists, or occasionally the antagonists.  The songs move the plot along, as well as provide exposition or a tension for the plot of the episode and the overarching plot of the season.
Here’s the song list (up to episode 6):
Episode 1: Happy Day in Hell (Charlie and Citizens of Hell) and Hell is Forever (Adam and Lute)
Episode 2: Stayed Gone (Vox and Alastor) and It Starts with Sorry (Charlie, Sir Pentious, Vaggie, Angel Dust)
Episode 3: Respectless (Carmilla, Velvette,  Zestial) and Whatever It Takes (Zestial, Carmilla, Vaggie)
Episode 4: Poison (Angel Dust) and Loser, Baby (Husker and Angel Dust)
Episode 5: Hell’s Greatest Dad (Lucifer and Alastor) and More Than Anything (Lucifer and Charlie)
Episode 6: Welcome to Heaven (Heaven Ensemble) and You Didn’t Know (Emily, Charlie, Sera, Adam, Lute)
Let’s dissect each number in terms of its introduction (I can make whole posts on all the numbers, but that’s a post for another day unless you guys want me to talk about it more).
Happy Day in Hell
Man, this song makes sense but also no sense with its introduction.  If you wind the episode back 10 seconds before the song starts, you will notice that the background music completely stops as Vaggie says something about the extermination while Charlie is catching her breath.  Then, Charlie immediately starts her song.
If the background music continued to swell through under Vaggie’s dialogue and morphed into the motif of Happy Day, then the musical number would’ve not have been so weirdly started.
Hell is Forever
This song has an interesting vamp in that it starts with higher instruments detailing Charlie’s hops as she lays down her plans to show Adam and Lute.  My issue with this particular vamp is that the background music right before it is (again) hard cut with a couple seconds of pure silence before we are immediately thrusted into the vamp.  This comes off as a very weird choice as I think that the music should’ve continued through without breaking it apart like that.  It would’ve made the quickness of the reprise of Happy Day in Hell seem more natural in comparison to the dialogue, as well as not throw the viewer off the rails with a slowish background song then an immediate whiplash into the musical number with no real transition.
Stayed Gone
This is one of the few songs that I think works perfectly (it's also my favorite but shhhh).  The vamp and emotion from Vox is on point, and I really wish that most of the songs would take from this song’s set up.
It Starts with Sorry
This one is kinda a weird one for me, and it’s very specific.  The transition from the background music to the vamp is wonderful, but then the transition from the vamp to the actual song has this almost abrupt cut.  The vamp has strings, but then it’s barely a fade into the glockenspiel of the actual song.  It causes this very weird sound drop that makes it not sound right at all.  If the strings would’ve stayed, but at a much quieter level with a resolution chord for the song, you can still have the same effect of the beginning measure of Sorry without that weird track change (Don’t worry, I’ll talk about the audio editing later).
Respectless
I dunno why I had it in my head originally that there was no background music before the song began, but honestly if this particular song didn’t have the background music, it would’ve been perfect actually.  This style of song is like an argument, so it would’ve made sense for it to come out of left field because Velvette (and the audience by extension) was not expecting Carmilla to defend Zestial.  However, there’s this weird choice of having tensions with the strings, then immediately having a guitar strum over it that doesn’t gel well with it at all before the background music gets cut off abruptly.  For this one, it’s not even a musical choice, this is almost a weird editing choice that I am not sure how to feel about.
Whatever It Takes
(This is my least favorite song for a number of reasons.  Bare with me on this one)
I think this song is the biggest beef I have in terms of how it’s introduced.  The mood is somber, and the vamp towards the song is quiet, but then the song is immediately loud, almost like it’s shouting.  I had my headphones all the way up to listen to the background and the vamp, and I almost threw off my headphones when the first notes of the song and that Zestial sing started playing (no shade to either).  I’m not sure what the hell was going on in the audio mixing department, but the songs are not doing well at all in the context of the episode (outside of it, they’re both great).
Poison
I love the vamp into the song for this one, personally one of my favorites of that mount musical volume before Angel starts to sing.  My one issue with it is the background music right before it.  It’s only a couple of seconds, but it shouldn’t be there at all.  I understand that it’s part of the Vee’s “menace theme”, but it should’ve just stayed out and kept the silence.  It would’ve made the vamp into Poison so much more effective.
Loser, Baby
This one is an odd one.  No vamp, just pure silence before Husk breaks into song.  I feel like the silence could’ve been prolonged just a touch more, then Husk starts to sing without the piano.  I feel like the beginning piano lick ruins that silence between Husk and Angel’s confessions to each other, and makes the song feel jarring to the lines right before it.
Hell’s Greatest Dad
Hrmm, I’m… perplexed.
There isn’t a musical problem this go around, but there is a set problem.  The chandelier that falls from the ceiling is meant to signify to Lucifer that his daughter does in fact need his help, but that chandelier has (at least to my recollection) never appeared once in the show, let alone the episode.  It’s the falling set piece that makes this song outright jarring because the setup doesn’t work at all.  Music-wise, it’s fine, no complaints from me.
More Than Anything
Listening to all these scenes back to back made me realize a problem that this song is the biggest sufferer of: volume change.  Just like with Whatever It Takes, the sudden volume change from the background music into the vamp is simply jarring.  I understand that it’s two different tracks that are put next to each other, but you can lower the volume of the vamp to make its transition so much more natural.  I’m not sure if this style for the musical numbers is an oversight or a deliberate decision at this point, but I honestly think that the audio volume is perhaps a bigger culprit than the music transitions.
Welcome to Heaven 
This feels like two scenes Frankensteined together.  You have Emily introducing herself, as well as (probably) her motif playing in the background, then out of left field, St. Peter starts to sing the song. 
Full stop. 
You cannot cut from one shot to the next as a musical transition from speech to song.  It would’ve made much more sense to have Emily and Charlie walking towards the gates, then St. Peter and Emily say “Welcome to heaven” as the music starts to play for the number.
You Didn’t Know
The music transition is a bit smoother (volume still needs adjustment, but not nearly as much as More Than Anything), but the tension in the score isn’t really there, which I feel like is the culprit for this song.  If there was tension in the music while Sera was talking and Emily was looking at the list, it would’ve made more sense to have Emily sing instead of talk.  In all honesty, if Emily would’ve spoken, “But she was right,” then Sera says, “What?” then Emily sings, “But she was right, Sera,” I think that would’ve made this transition work almost perfectly.
This is no shade at anybody working on Hazbin Hotel, this was just something I noticed nobody talking about.  The team is doing a wonderful job on the show, and I absolutely love it all!  I’m just wanting to give my two cents on a topic that no one was really delving into.
Lemme know if you guys want me to talk in more detail about any of the songs, I am more than happy to do so!
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tiktaalic ¡ 9 months
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i’ve never heard sum1 talk ab t swiz the way u do. and i feel like yeahh. ur so right. it’s the dolly parton & dean winchester & barbie perfomativw drag expression of gender of it all…. like it’s like … it’s like it is. bc am i a lesbian (.askskfjskks i dunno u can’t expect me to know that ab myself).. but like i’ve never once thought like.. yeah blonde woman sex w her?? but she’s like a woman… she is stereotypical barbie, she is a doll… a robot…. fnaf animatronic..
BUT THEN… she will do smth and she becomes real and i get it.. but she could wear a little slutty revealing outfit on tour and my brain is jst like… ok 👍😁 ok taylor! like reminds me of barbie movie and men wer sexualizing her… and i’m like what is theee to sexualize. she’s just a blob in the shape of a woman. she’s just like that like huhhhhh….??..
even when in her more “sexy” eras… i’m still like, where is the anythjng and why is she nothjng. she’s an amoeba. why is she not permeating my membrane. Crazy woman like where r u ? bc like she can have her choppy bangs and black outfits and be this weird white woman expression of being a baddie but still. there’s nothing there. R u ready for it…? no i’m not what am i ready for taylor tell me…
in conclusion, i think she is a mime?
yeah this is the shape of it. taylor YOU are the sexy baby. and the craziest part 2 me is when people are like. ohhhhhh my god this is the hottest she's ever looked about . well anything she ever wears. because it's all sexy baby to me. it's all instagram explore page. like of course in every photo of her taken shes a beautiful woman but its like. well you're wearing this. for the express purpose of being photographed. and looking on trend. and trending on twitter. in preparation for your album / rerecord / tour. you're wearing this for the photo. so . versus. when the personality slips through and it's so jarring you'relike. w. hey. has taylor swift been hot the whole time? and the answer is still NO! she is only hot when she briefly snaps out of her 24/7 grind to be the most acclaimed most famous most rich most respected artist the world has ever seen
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cmyk-anaglyph-honeycomb ¡ 3 months
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Hazbin Hotel Episode 5 Live Blogging
Spoilers below
Oh god this is kinda long. Again it is past midnight and I wont be editing this.
Three minutes in and I hate everything about Charlie's dad. Dude moves like a pool noodles. Not that big of a fan of his voice, but it matches everything else that's going on with him.
Rubber ducks?
The texture on whatever the edge of that couch looks like frozen static. Why is it like that? is it supposed to be glittering?
Everyone helping to fix up the hotel is nice but that level of support and cooperation kinda feels like it comes out of nowhere. Not a single on of the hotel gang had a comment about showing Satan a beatup hotel or that he's THE GUY in hell and they are perfectly okay and normal about meeting him. NONE of them are nervous about it???
Alastor looks like he's about to go feral, lol
Razzle and Dazzle suddenly showing up with zero introduction, that neat. And there the kitty that I assume is the hotel key and a mich needed plot device at the end of the season.
Wait are R and D pets?? Oop, they're they go. Nice cameos guys.
Acknowledging that Alastor named it the hazbin hotel only raises more questions as to why the named was kept.
Alastor not knowing what lucifer looks like feels wrong. Again he is THE GUY of hell, how does no one, especially an overlord, not at least know what he looks like.
Alastor saying fuck you is jarring, but in a funny way.
Lucifer is so hard to watch. Song time.
Alastor as a nun
Why are they having a dad battle?? what is their beef they've literally never interacted. It's just on sight.
oh god the fiddle.
accordion??
He called him a deas!?!
random woman...? Mimzy, okay.
She did not need to push Pen like that, poor man.
Finally Alastor backstory- hold on that doctor overlord tho.
Alastor being aggressive toward Husk is good development with Ep 4, but this should have happened first or in the same episode. Or the two episodes should've been released as a set. Anyway, see him come off as an antagonist is good considering he's supposed to be one and all.
Vaggie why would you mention Angel's drugs while trying to sell lucifer on your road to redemption plan?
Lucifer's 'wackiness' is getting tiring fast what's his character supposed- THAT FUCKING STATIC IS BACK. Its on the windows too now.
Somebody fucking said it, thank you. I don't doubt that Charlie coukd redeem so sinners, but most of them are used to doing whatever they want. Being in heaven is a hard switch and considered tge extermination are for fun, anyone who might get redeemed is not looking at a good time. Maybe if there was a way for them to be reincarnated thenthat would work better.
Giant Alastor. Welcome back to may favorite character list.
The hotel gang eating popcorn is funny. No notes.
Alastor actually carring about the hotel is interesting. Even if it is just for entertainment, him telling Mimzy to leave like that was neat. Also, is it just me or is Mimzy animated odd. It feels jerky, but not in an intentional way.
Song #2.
He sounds like a country singer trying a new genre for the first time.
He says that he cares about her so much, but he actively doesn't interact with her. Charlie says as much at the beginning of the episode.
Oh cool so they were never close, why?
Lilith is faceless because...? It kinda takes you out of the sad song moment.
Literally what was stopping them from getting to know each other? They lived in the same house. If ut was Lilith, she's been gone for seven years. If Lucifer cared about knowing his daughter that much he should have jumped on the chance, not make rubber ducks, or whatever he was doing. It wasn't like he was ruling hell cuz no one knows what he looked like.
Wait, why could Mimzy guess who he was if Alastor hardly knew him?
Credits are rolling. I did not care about either of the songs. Alastor makes this episode, Lucifer shatters it. He isn't even convinced Charlie's plan could work, he just wants to support her. Like good job as a dad, but support alone isn't going to get the job down.
Hopefully the next episode will answer if redeeming sinners is even a possibility, like physically.
Ep 5 is like my second or third favorite only cuz I don't really feel anything for the first two.
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prosopopeya ¡ 6 months
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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!
Tagged by @binickandros!!!!!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
26 apparently
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
460,406
3. What fandoms do you write for?
supernatural now mainly, though i've written for house md, spring awakening, and bare: a pop opera
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
these are all dean/cas fics:
inevitable homoeroticism in spanish romantic heroes (spanish grad school au)
like real people do (my return from the spn grave, basically a reaction fic to The Confession Scene)
command me to be well (angsty post-canon dean gets cas back; sort of a love letter/spiritual sequel to my first spn fic, which is also on this list)
flying in circles inside a jar (a classic s5 era fic with some deeply awkward dialogue that i don't like now but i mean this was written over 10 years ago)
some boys are sleeping alone (my first spn fic and basically my thesis on dean's bisexuality that would feed....just about every fic to come after)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i try, though inevitably i get overwhelmed (even by like, one comment) and then time passes and then it's just overwhelming and awkward. but i try! it's hard especially when i just am rephrasing "thanks, i'm glad you liked it!"
6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
100% something from the house or spring awakening era. (does anyone else remember when apocalypse aus were all the rage for house or was that just me and my friend angie.) a lot of those aren't on ao3 though, so probably the saddest ending over there is hm... "some boys are sleeping alone." or, shout out to my bare: a pop opera fic, still going strong over there: all the stars bend over sideways.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
there are a lot of happy endings to be found now but maybe for the sheer weight of the force behind everything building up to its ending, let me come home. that one or "command me to be well," which i swear i remember someone somewhere saying that it doesn't just relieve the angst at the end, but it luxuriates in the happy ending.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
not really, no, at least not to my face. i've seen some commentary somewhere about people not being into post-canon fic that doesn't involve jack, but i still have barely seen the jack seasons......... oops
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
yes, usually i throw something in there. inevitably it winds up dom/sub-y in some way. my favorite manifestation of this was the slow evolution of dom-y cas in "let me come home," especially when writing from his headspace bc that's not the usual for me. but other than that, my favorite is cowboy's sweetheart
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
ohhhhh boy. back in the day i loved a challenge for the wildest mashups people could think of. freddie from chess/donuts was the quintessential example of this, written in the wake of strikethrough on lj. one of the few that i still allow to see the light of day: thank you for being a friend, a my little pony/supernatural crossover.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
not that i'm aware of though someone did put "inevitable homoeroticism" and "command me to be well" on goodreads.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
i've had someone podfic one of my fics! though the recording isn't up anymore i don't think
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
YESSS @marbleflan and i had a great time with:
r/relationships: inspired by an r/relationships post where a guy is sleeping with a woman only for her...husband to walk in on them, oops, and oh no surprise also, he's really hot??????? wait is this gay????? (it is)
perfect match: inspired by the season 8 of are you the one? an mtv reality dating show. the typical premise of this show is to put pairs of people in a house and tell them that they have to find their scientifically, dr. love approved perfect match out of all the people in the house, and if you all guess wrong, you lose money; if you all guess right, then you win money. but in season 8....everybody was bi/pan/queer, so anyone could be your match. it was supremely messy and also great. many key moments were lifted from that season including i think the drunken orgy, the theme dance night, and the intervention. i have a lot of memories of furiously writing/editing my portions of this to and from my in-laws' for thanksgiving while my husband wanted me to, like, participate in conversation in the car.
14. What's your all-time favorite ship?
i mean.................... guess.
15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?
man i started this really great one about dean and cas accidentally arguing about not having sex when they both actually wanted to have sex and i really want to finish it but idk! i refuse to put the dean watches heartstopper fic on here bc i WILL finish that.
16. What are your writing strengths?
i think character voice, through dialogue and narration. i like situating myself in a character's head and feeling things out through their perspective.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
repetition, and like.... plots.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
been there, done that. wordreference carried me.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
lizzie mcguire, i think, and labyrinth. also if i recall, buffy, and star trek: voyager.
20. Favorite fic you've written?
"let me come home." i think it has to be. it has just about everything in it, every thought or feeling i've ever had about supernatural. i'm really super proud of it, and unlike inevitable homoeroticism, i'm never going to feel like enough people have read that fic. like i just want more people to read it. usually i'm pretty good about just going with the flow, the whims of ao3 and what people seem to respond to, and not really being bothered by how popular a fic is or isn't. but man i want it to crack that top 5 list so badly. (it can replace flying in circles. the others can stay.)
if you write fic, you are tagged, but i scrolled through some pages of my followers to look for mutuals in the fic writing game; if i missed you i was just reading too quickly!!!! you are tagged!!!!: @ltleflrt, @blanketforcas, @hauntedpearl, @goldenraeofsun, @jewishdeanwinchester, @bbcphile, @wanderingcas
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ritzcrackee ¡ 29 days
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april tbr post yayy
rereads are marked by a ☆, new reads are marked by a ♡, and new acquisitions are bolded
physical tbr: 20
what moves the dead - t. kingfisher ♡
an education in malice - s. t. gibson ♡
juilet takes a breath - gabby rivera ♡
stories of people and civilization, greek ancient origins - lindsay powell, j. k. jackson ♡
rebel girls - elizabeth keenan ♡
the silent stars go by - dan abbet ♡
touched by an angel - johnathan morris ♡
dracula - bram stoker ♡
dune - frank herbert ♡
dune messiah - frank herbert ♡
frankenstein - mary shelley ♡
sense and sensibility - jane austen ♡
hippie - barry miles ♡
evernight - claudia gray ☆
stargazer - claudia gray ♡
the handmaids tale - margaret atwood ☆
the testaments - margaret atwood ♡
aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the
universe - benjamin alire sáenz ☆
would-be witch - kimberly frost ☆
the ballad of songbirds and snakes - suzanne collins ☆
digital tbr: 2
pandora's jar: women in the greek myths - natalie haynes ♡
wild is the witch - rachel griffin ♡
read: 7
a million kisses in your lifetime - monica murphy - dnf
i got like 80 pages in and then just,,, could not continue. no shade if u liked this book it was just solidly, solidly not my thing.
my monster valentine - various authors - 3/5
debated putting this on here for obvious reasons but i neeeeed to be accurate i guess. i only read about half of the stories in this collection and they were pretty hit or miss. it was free though so yk. vibes.
high spirits - camille gomera-tavarez - 2.5/5
this book was pretty alright! i don't have much to say about it (hence the middling rating) but i would reccomend it if you're looking for a fast read :D
the coldest touch - isabel sterling - 4/5
THIS WAS SO CUUUUTTTTTEEEEE!!! i liked the way the author portrayed the genuine hell that being stuck at 17 would be. please get me out of here i want a fully developed frontal lobe. AW and all of the characters were super likable. truly so adorable i was squealing the whole time.
im knocking a point off for the romance being a littttllllleeeee rushed and the character descriptions feeling off (it felt odd that both pov characters categorized every single person into a specific race? i think its good practice to make a characters race clear, but idk if that applies to a random teacher with no dialogue). to be so real though i loved this book enough that it didn't bother me too much.
beastly & bookish - catrina bell - 5/5
did i finish this book in one sitting? yes. did i stay up until 1am doing that? ...mind your business. honestly, im maybeee being a little bit generous giving this 5 stars but !! i really liked it!!! rom was soo mecore. i'm excited to read the rest of the books in this collection (even though they're all christmasy), and i can't wait for my physical copy to get here!!
holly's unjolly christmas - lark green - 2/5
this book was truly just fine. like, the definition of pretty alright. the tropes weren't my thing and the romance felt wildly rushed, but the writing style was easy to read and there were some funny bits. i also felt like the demon characters fell pretty flat? idk felt mid overall. (tbh the highlights of this book were when rom and noelle showed up. my babiesssss)
holidays ablaze - lucy limon - 3/5
v cute 👍 i love samite he's so autistic 💗
last months goal: finish dune
hmm ok. so i did not finish dune. i don't know why i thought i could. whatever possessed me to believe i could finish an 800 page sci-fi book in one month was truly of the devil herself. what the fuck. that was a blatant temptation towards hubris and I FELL FOR IT. anyways i hit 300 pages. everyone clap.
this months goal: finish a re-read
i have a lot of books i'd like to re-read but!!! i just never get around to it!!!! there r always newer shinier books that grab my attention!! i'd also like to carve away a more sizable chunk of my physical tbr this month because i have officially run out of space on my bookshelf TwT. everything is so so crammed in there, i truly cannot afford any more physical books. public library here i come!!
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themculibrary ¡ 2 months
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Natasha & Yelena Masterlist 2
part one
A light in the dark (ao3) - porous_umbrella (orphan_account) N/R, 1k
Summary: Yelena met her first as a stranger, a sister, and finally, the Black Widow.
3 times they met + 1 time they said goodbye.
american pie (ao3) - ashlearose13 G, 4k
Summary: Here's the thing about Natasha Romanoff: before she was theirs, she was her own.
draw a monster (ao3) - mikkary T, 3k
Summary: Maybe somewhere there is a kind of monster who protects young girls. But she knows it will not be one of the Red Room's creations.
Or, Natasha takes some time, and a few weeks off the grid, to figure out what makes a monster.
Family Means No One Gets Left Behind (ao3) - writewithurheart maria/steve/natasha M, 19k
Summary: *CONTAINS BLACK WIDOW MOVIE SPOILERS*
A re-imagining of the movie where it actually interacts with the rest of the MCU instead of doing backflips to go around it...
heart to heart (ao3) - idiotlesbian wanda/natasha M, 6k
Summary: "You are still doing it. Protecting me." "You are still my baby sister."
- Natasha and Yelena need to heal. It's easier to do it together. (And in doing so Yelena meets her sister's girlfriend.)
how to fight a losing battle (ao3) - adumbledore G, 3k
Summary: Yelena Belova spends twenty-one years serving the Red Room. Along the way, she encounters the Winter Soldier.
if you're still breathing, you're the lucky ones (ao3) - Charlie_Balle M, 11k
Summary: >>BLACK WIDOW SPOILERS&lt;<
What if Yelena was just a bit younger? Still a teenager. What if the Red Room cracked down when Natasha escaped? Yelena was plunged into hell. She comes out colder and bitter. She won’t be so forgiving this time.
Basically, what I feel should have happened if Black Widow wasn’t restricted to a PG-13 rating
Melt With You (ao3) - thetbone G, 3k
Summary: Skating, snowball fights, and swear jars — all crucial elements of a family reunion.
Silence (ao3) - thenigotthisfamily (guitarplayer3) T, 3k
Summary: Two weeks after Natasha and Yelena bring down the Red Room, there is still so much left unsaid between them. Or, Natasha and Yelena finally talk like grown-ups.
Thanksgiving (ao3) - fishspeakers G, 2k
Summary: Natasha celebrates Thanksgiving with her new family.
The Crimson Garden (ao3) - M_E_Carter T, 5k
Summary: Exploring the remains of an abandoned Red Room training facility leads to the discovery of its origins.
Training Wheels (ao3) - thetbone G, 13k
Summary: Natasha doesn’t know how to ride a bike, doesn’t know how to be part of a family, doesn’t know how to be free.
But she’s learning.
You have to be a big girl now (ao3) - aanemonej N/R, 840
Summary: Natasha is risking a lot, but she has to say goodbye to her little sister
You taught me how to care (and I haven't forgotten since) (ao3) - AutumnalVesperum G, 11k
Summary: Sister. What a strange, incomprehensible emotion of a word.
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bruce-wayne-simp ¡ 1 year
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Like Minds
Hey hi hello im about to watch Like Minds (aka Murderous Intent) and apparently the only way i can watch movies now is by liveblogging them so 🤷‍♀️
(Maybe expect the LotR trilogy next idk)
Like with Remainder i have a vague idea what this movie is about. Well, maybe a bit more of an idea what this is about. All i know is there are 2 teenage murderers and a TON of homoeroticism (not canon i think but youre crazy if you dont see it)
Also this liveblog/my watching of Like Minds was heavily sped up by @catlovingwitch who sent me a lovely ask which fuckign FUELED me to do this so thank you v v much ❤️❤️❤️
Once again, i am a T Sturridge stan so this will probably be very heavy on him. Unless over the course of this i become an Eddie Redmayne stan
Spoilers be ahead
Idk why im like. Anxious? Whatever.
Its starting aaaaaa
Eddie R screaming on a train (hes thrilled)
Ooh theyre stealing stuff?? T Sturridge isnt here yet
(The way its set up is Alex (Eddie) is captured by the police and is basically giving them The Backstory™️ which is where Nigel (Tom) comes in)
Oh shit he killed Nigel
Ok so psychiatry lady is here and her name is Sally
God Alex looks so young
Ooh this is interesting and actually really good
Flashback starting
THERES NIGEL god hes pretty
Lmaooo Nigel is the new kid and hes Alex's roommate and Alex is kinda pissed lol
Thats what you get when you snoop. Alex was looking in Nigels trunk and found a taxidermied cat(??)
Lmao Nigels in the doorway like 'Do you mind?'
Oh hes so concerned about his taxidermy
'Hes weird' they say as they explode a cockroach for fun
Lmao Nigel reads books about anatomy/autopsies?? yikes
Oof Alex is pulling the misogyny card. Hes telling the psychiatrist lady shes running out of time to have kids 💀 sir youre not helping your case
"Nigel got what he wanted." "And what was that?" "Eternity."
Sally is Over It. She doesnt think Alex is guilty
Shes listening to the tape she recorded from her talk with Alex and is like 'hmmmm'
Back to flashbackss
Oh god Nigels dissecting a bird IN THE DORM ROOM
Lmaooooo i love Nigel
Alex is PISSED and is like 'the least you can do is show me some common courtesy' and Nigels like '??? K.'
Well that interview just went to shit
So Alex was kinda taunting Sally but mostly the detective dude. So detective guy comes in and is like 'Gunshot residue says you were holding the gun when it went off'
Alex asks to see his father, the detectuve is like 'he cant help you', Alex panics a little, grabs Sallys wrist snd is like 'Nigel was holding the gun when it went off, i didnt do this' and the detective dude loses it and punches him and Alex is dragged off to lockup kicking and screaming
Apparently Nigel ALSO had GSR on his hands so anybody couldve pulled the trigger
Yall need to watch this fucking movie
Ok so basically a guard runs back in and is like 'He wants to talk'. Well actually hes holding 2 guards hostage w a police baton and is pleading to be let out of the cell. He fights the guards, loses and Sally shows up as hes on the ground being cuffed again. They sit him on the bed, Alex insists he didnt kill Nigel and then starts talking about someone being 'here' and 'listening' and Sallys like '???'
Ooh ok so Alex thinks someone is talking to him im his head?? Does he think Nigel is?? We are at a flashback btw
Wait did they already steal stuff off the train??
Alex youre a bit of a brat lmao
Wait was he stealing stuff for his dad????
Ok Alex and his friends are kind of dicks
Ooh Alex is challenging the pastor dude who is teaching religious history i assume
Nigel is looking at him like hes kinda in love
HOOOO CHECK AND MATE. GET REKT PASTOR DUDE
Lmaooo Nigel keeps dead things in jars. He has a big thing of formaldehyde hanging up lmaoooo
You know what i actually kind of agree with Alex. I mean thats p reasonable
(The Headmaster (who seems to be fond of Alex) sees Nigels collection of dead animals and is trying to justify why Nigel is there and allowed to stay. Alex is the first quote)
"He's a part of your club and nobody else wanted him so youre doing the 'brotherly' thing. Yeah well does my future depend on that?"
"Thats enough-"
"No, you dont give a fuck about me or this guy the only thing that you care about-"
"Thats enough!"
"-is the amount of kudos his father's-
"I said enough!"
"No, which is fine, but just dont give me the 'brotherhood' bullshit."
Then the headmaster slaps him and is like 'This boy will be made welcome' and walks out lol
Oooh theres Nigel
Lmao he walks in, slides in behind Alex, grabs his notebook off the desk and walks out, visibly amused.
Jfc Nigel is making psychological notes on Alex and his friends
"This little shit needs to be taught a lesson"
Alex's friend, Josh, is a pos. He just made a literal Nazi joke. To Alex's credit he tells him to knock it off
At least one of his friends has 2 braincells.
Are they straight up chloroforming Nigel??? Wtf
They dragged him onto the train unconscious
Oh shit Alex is like holding him outside of the door while the steel beams to the side are rushing past them. Nigel seems out of it tbh cause hes not freaking out
Josh is lighting firecrackers and tossing them out of the train and he dropped one and freaked so Alex and Nigel got back in. Nigel went to walk away and Alex pushed him up against the wall like 'Where do you think youre going??'. Nigel just spit in Alex's face and Alex punched Nigel
Oooooohhhh shit Alex leaned Nigel out of the door again and Josh started freaking out and told him to let Nigel go and the handle Josh was holding onto the train with BROKE
Oh shit Nigel just let him fall
Like he straight up waved his hand over Josh's hand to taunt him i guess and he got sucked out of the train wtf
I feel like the thing to keep in mind here is all of this is being told by Alex and hes Not a reliable narrator
WAIT THE HEADMASTER IS ALEX'S FATHER???
Oh yeah Alex is an unreliable narrator for SURE. Besides some fondness there was 0 mention of him being Alex's father. Or maybe im just dumb which is entirely possible. Likely, in fact.
Lmao Nigel staring at Alex like a freak at Josh's funeral until his dad nudges him like 'Knock it off'
Alex's dad eyeing Nigel as he walks away
Alex and Nigel arent roommates anymore
Nigel reading basically smut in front of class (in front of Alex 😏😏) classy smut im sure but still
Alex is watching rehearsals of the play and Nigel comes up super close like 'sorry about ur friend' and is kinda. Creepy and morbid about it. Which tracks
I think its interesting that TS's facial expressions and delivery here is SO reminiscent of his role as Dream. Ive seen him make these EXACT expressions in The Sandman while talking. Its odd seeing them on a younger face tho (not in a bad way)
Oh my god Alex just got a human hand in a package. 3 guesses as to who its from? (I assume. I dont actually know. Im not gonna do my boy Nigel dirty like that)
Alex vomited and hes telling Sally that when he got back it was gone
Nigel comes into Alex's room, gives him some papers to help with his essay while Alex is yellimg at him to get out and leaves lmaoooo
My boy Nigel doesnt deserve the slander 😤😤
"How did he know i was struggling with my essay?" Youre a dumbass and hes smart
"How did he know my topic?" Idk maybe if you made an effort to know him youd find out. Im sure Nigel can be charming when he wants to be but hes not gonna be on guard 24/7 so you got to see the spooky shit hes into when you were roommates
"I mean he had answers to questions i hadnt even thought of yet." Omg could Nigel be... Smart?? Impossible. Only idiots study anatomy and dissect things. 🙄 CMON ALEX
Jfc Alex you are dramatic as hell. Hes comparing using Nigels notes to 'selling his soul'. Just get the easy A my guy
Me every time Nigel comes on screen: 🥰🥰🥰
Nigel and the dog im DECEASED
The dog doesn't like ALEX oooooo
Dogs know who you really are 🧐🧐🧐
"I've never brought anybody here before. You're the first. Okay? First."
Nigel just wants to be friends 😭😭 he brought Alex to his hideout and the first thing he asks is 'Do you like it?' 😭😭😭😭😭
Oh jfc Nigel is as crazy as Alex
God that LOOK he gives when Alex is flipping through the book. You cannot convince me Nigel isn't in love with Alex
"An implement for killing. That's what I am." N I G E L
Jesus. Alex thinks Nigel is in his head.
Alex just asked a girl (Susan) out on a date and Nigel came up afterward all friendly and tried to give him a book and Alex completely cut him off
Poor Nigel :(
Ok also poor Alex but i don't feel as bad for him cos hes an ass
Holy shit did Nigel kill someone?? Alex woke up and someone threw a knife on his desk stuck to a Jack playing card with blood
Oh my god its Susan (that girl Alex was gonna go on that date with)
Nigel this doesnt look good for you buddy
Nobody's accusing him but she was kinda.... dissected. Its pretty graphic if you watch this movie just be aware
Oh shit she was in the school greenhouse
I think Alex did it. Hear me out. Hes the one telling this story. If he did it, hes gonna tell the story in a way that makes Nigel look bad. Nigel, conveniently enough, cannot say anything otherwise. Cause he's dead. I think at the very least he did kill Nigel but telling the story this way makes him the hero for killing the big bad serial killer.
Ok back to the movie the knife and the card are gone from his desk and Alex is looking for Nigel.
Now the detective is getting statements from all the students who saw Susan before she was killed
Oooooh Alex got caught in a lie
'Ooh I sense some hostility' just kiss him already JESUS
OH SHIT. Nigel is remorseful about what happened and Alex was like 'You did it. Didn't you?' And Nigel says 'No, Jack. You did.'
(Jack is a nickname. It's explained in the movie i just don't feel like rehashing it sorry)
Alex punched him
"Well im sorry Jack but you were the one who got inside my head." OHHHHH FOLIE A DEUX
Nigel: You can fix him? I can make him worse <3
And we love him for it
Something something criticism of upper class structures (see: quote above about 'brotherhood'), parents being not involved in their kids lives and not seeing obvious signs of mental illness due to that (Nigel's... everything and Alex's authority issues, sense of grandeur and family issues)
This scene is where Alex's dad tries to get the detective to drop the charges and tries to use his connections to the detectives father to do so but he refuses to drop it.
Oh shit apparently theres no evidence Nigel did anything to Susan
Also apparently the detectives cant find Nigels parents so 🤨
Hmmm
Sally is gonna look at Nigels hideout
Damn Nigel had a TON of notebooks
Oh SHIT Nigel had photos of a sleeping girl
Nigel its really hard to defend this i hope you know that
Oh fuck theres a dead body under Nigels house
Apparently 2??
ALEX DID IT. FINAL ANSWER.
Nigel showed Alex the hideout!! Alex was the FIRST and ONLY person (besides Nigel) who knew about it!!! The bodies were fresh!!!! Alex did it. Nigel my babe ill defend you to the death Alex is a psycho
Its ride or die for Nigel Colbie in this house
Aww Nigel introduced Alex to his parents
"Helen and John, this is my best friend Alex. Hes working on the play." Oh yah rich ppl are fucked up. Imagine introducing your parents to your friend by their FIRST NAMES 🤮
Ooh he just read Nigels bible
Nigel thinks hes directly descended from the Knights Templar
See, Alex seems to be reading this like it's his first time seeing all of it. But HE BROUGHT IT UP FIRST. In that class with the pastor earlier. Nigel was watching him. This was right before Nigel started pursuing him (and i don't think this was how it happened. Hold on i'll talk about it later. I think Alex went after Nigel. And I've seen other people think this as well)
Alex's mother died while giving birth to him and he told his father that her death was his fault since he got her pregnant 😬
Oh god
Ok so
Sally found a card that said 'My beloved Maraclea' and Alex is telling her who Maraclea is
Maraclea was the lover of a knights templar in the 13th century who died and the knights templar. Uh. Had sex with her dead body. And basically 9 months later he goes back and her skull is moved from her shoulders to on top of her thigh bones which are crossed. He has to protect the skull bcs itll give them grest fortune or whatever
While hes telling her this theres a flashback to Nigel and Alex meeting up at night and uh. Theyre in a morgue.
I dont like where this is going 😣
Oh fuck its Susan
Is. Is Alex gonna necrophile Susans body
Did he do it???
Hes saying Nigel took him there to basically recreate the whole Maraclea thing but its ambiguous as to if he actually did it
Holy shit thats fucked up
So Alex is watching through the window
Nigels father found those photos that Sally found and. Um. I think those are of Nigels mother actually.
Implied incest/CSA warning (im gonna italicize it. Skip the italicized part. Nothing graphic and not even really explicitly abuse but theres an accusation being made basically. CSA bcs Nigel is 17)
Nigel is in his bed and so is his mother. Shes in a slip and hes in pajamas and his father is holding a gun and yelling and basically accusing them of sleeping together (tho Nigel is 17 and also thats his mother so uh. Yeah.)
Tbf it only incidentally looks like that and she claims they were just talking. But also i have no reason to trust her so uh. Yeah.
Oh my god
Nigels father just shot his mother right next to him.
Holy fuck.
Alex came in and grabbed the gun and asked Nigel what hes done and Nigel said she was 'chosen'
Alex points the gun at Nigel and Nigels dad gets in between them and is shot by Alex
Oh my god wtf
'Ill have my Maraclea' What. In the actual. Fuck.
And he just. Casually dumps his fathers organs into the fire.
"Dont you think they're gonna be missed?"
"Well as long as they dont find her nine months it doesnt really matter, does it?"
🤮🤮🤮🤮
Nigel i cant defend this.
Oh god Alex did it too with Susan
Tom Sturridge angry with a shotgun is something i didnt know i needed but im glad i have it
Oh shit they both did it
Nigel used Alex to kill himself
Holy shit
Alex had the shotgun pointed at Nigel and Nigel is very obviously upset and doesnt understand why Alex thinks hes the crazy one.
He told Alex to pray for him, reached up and pulled the trigger while Alex was holding the gun
ALEX WALKED????
HOLY SHIT ALEX IS MAKING HIS OWN BIBLE
HE LEFT AN ENVELOPE ON SALLYS CAR AND IN IT THERES A JACK CARD THAT SAYS 'MY BELOVED SUSAN'
Holy fuck he broke into Susans tomb and took her skull
Holy shit hes doing the same thing Nigel did to him to someone else
Roll credits
Ok ok ok wow so um.
I dont think Nigel did it
Well ok. I think the truth is somwhere in the middle. Alex is putting a lot of blame on Nigel for someone who may or may not have killed 2 people to Nigel's 1
God its so hard to collect my thoughts about this film. Also its like 2 am so uh. That doesnt help.
I think Alex had a more dominant role than he let on. Also considering how quick he was to pick up the mantle, idk. I just know while watching this i was surprised by how much Alex killed even as Nigel called himself an instrument for killing. All Nigel did that we know for certain was let a kid fall out of a train. Alex straight up shot Nigels father.
Nigel is more quiet and reclusive and morbid and Alex is more intelligent and outgoing.
Of course Alex makes a point to emphasize how morbid Nigel is and ive already pointed out how i think Alex is an unreliable narrator. Alex is smart. He knew how he needed to tell the story and he succeeded. He got off scot free.
Unfortunately i dont think Nigel would have been able to do that. Nigel was smart but not as smart as Alex. He would have slipped up
So what happened to Susan? I keep going back and forth on this. I think it could go either way. But i hate to say it. I think Nigel did it. This whole thing kinda goes back to the Maraclea thing and Nigel knew about it already. So he kills Susan and guts her so Alex has his Maraclea and he goads his father into killing his mother so he 🤮 has... his...
Basically i think Nigel is more evil but Alex had a bigger part than he lets on
Its v v complicated. Or its just 2 am idk. (respectfully) Leave your thoughts if you feel so inclined
Oh my god he said Alex killed her because in Nigels mind he chose Susan as his Maraclea oh good lord
(But Nigel is pretty and fictional so we'll give him a pass)
Im definitely rewatching this at some point. Its actually really good
Ok thats all lol bye im gonna go see if theres Like Minds fanfic
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hinamie ¡ 10 months
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oh my god ok so i know im late I didn't talk about it because it happened during one of my Offline Eras but . but listen ok lisn the new former vandal album sent me THROUgh the FUCKINNG ROOF to be fair i knew it would like i joked about going upstairs to listen to it and cry when it dropped but i didn't think that every fucking song would hit me so hard in the kokoro it made me wail because I too have immense religious guilt ANYWAY im gonna rant incoherently and at length now hope u all missed me
ok first of all gotta shout out the fuckin album title i knew it was gonna be devastating when I saw it . fuckin. divine interference????? music for god's playthings indeed i eat that shit up i was like yoooooo hes also got a bone to pick with jesus go off bestie <333
so former vandal are artists visionaries kings so ofc tracklist is all mythology n religion-inspired (lazarus/goliath/ouroboros etc) and i think its so cool that theyre all in caps until u get to the end and the final song is denial and it's in lowercase and maybe its simple but i was like ART. ARTTTTTT. and it made me go back and look at the tracklist of their previous album and I realized that the whole thing was about vices and unhealthy coping with an overwhelming and forsaken existence but then the final song was Get Right (still my go-to comfort song to this day tbh tbh tbh) and it's like an acknowledgement that ok maybe none of this is the answer and something has to change anyway wrong album oops back 2 divine interference
i made a point of listening to the songs that hadnt been released as singles first so the first song i listened to was Lazarus and tbh probably my fav song on the album maybe tied with parables and maaaaybe even icarian. BUT LAZARUS SLAPS SOS SOSOOSO HARD god the theme of not knowing how to leave something behind even when it's bad for you,,, both criticizing but also mirroring the actual story of lazarus in the lyrics being like "wow kinda fucked up of god for resurrecting u without ur consent" but also acknowledging that he himself is guilty of holding onto the things that kill him.,,, GOD ITS SO FUCKING G GOOD I FDFGSADFGDG
salt also !!! BANGER not quite up there with the likes of lazarus but it gets bonus points because a. i lov the idea of starting to recognize that you're coming into yourself n an identity apart from your vices n traumas and b. for having two of the most RAW lines in the entire album imo which is reaaallly saying something: "now that everything's bright I guess I'm fine/but there's an art in the dark that took years to refine" and "the spark of divine intervention/that I'm still terrified I've left behind" (ALBUM TITLE DROP ALBUM TITLE DROP) god these two just dont miss and i love it but i am far too neurodivergent to contain myself they need to give me a break pls i am v i b r a t i n g
ok gonna move into the Chill(tm) tracks I think with goliath as well as shame/rotten I vibe more with the lyrics than the actual songs because i prefer my angsty alt pop to be Upbeat thank u very much but can i just say. the lyrics of these two songs ESPECIALLY SHAME/ROTTEN LIKE ok first of all i love the tonal shift halfway through that manages not to make them feel like completely different songs it's just jarring enough like there's been an acceptance of sorts,, like omg same i too am like 'god i feel like the scum of the earth might as well own it a bit',, "the fear of god/the need for blame" fuckin bullseye ow,, "I starve to feed the parts of me/far from who i oughta be/tell me are you proud of me yet?" FUCKIN BULLSEYE OWW
I know i just said i prefer my angst upbeat but crocodile tears (very upbeat very rock wuaw) is probably my least favourite track if i had to pick but it does have a lyrical BANGER of an opening verse ("holding the hand that's holding me under" g o d) i think i just don't dig the overall melody too much and find the ending a bit repetitive fr my tastes,, who knows though it took a while and many re-listens for ouroboros to grow on me maybe this'll b a similar story ,, but then again ouroboros had the advantage of echoing mine own mental health and self-destructive behaviours shdgj
ok so i was crying from the beginning right but the songs that made me ugly bawl were growing pains (very similar vibes to get right but in a "i know that i'm healing" way rather than a "i need to heal" way) and denial,, but starting w growing pains,, my god idk What they did with the mic/vocals after the bridge but it felt like the music was being injected directly into my ears secret direct path 2 my bloodstream god I hadnt felt chills like that in such a long time and idk just the whole Mood of the song having been hurting for so long and only now starting to recognize the damage you've done but also appreciate the progress youv made,,, i have so so many emotions but DENIAL (its funny saying it in caps bc its the only track in lowercase getit getit) oh my god ths going straight on the list of Songs That Make Me Think About My Relationship With My Dad but also Songs That Make Me Emo About All The People I've Grown Apart From and i think its so powerful to frame a personal transition away from faith as growing apart from an old friend and missing them despite any hard feelings holy shit though holy shit . the first listen by this point i had already been emotionally devastated by the Whole Album so i was like ok surely ill get a break by the last song lol nope sorry i ended up crying so hard i think i gave myself a headache
I think I must have yelled about the songs that they released as singles when they dropped individually but it's been so long that i forget what i said but honestly parables and icarian are still just as good as when i heard them for the first time (when parables dropped i spilled my tea on my fucking notes bc i was vibing too hard),, I love parables' msg of accepting the lessons ur (traumatic) past taught u and how it shaped u as a person even if u recognize that that person is someone hurt and in need of healing and maybe that has to happen alone! and i know for a fact i've gushed about icarian (still one of the most gojocore songs Ever imho dont fight me on this) but now looking at it in the context of the rest of the album i love that it's first cause it really frames the whole icarus thing of having flown too close to the sun or to god and getting burned and that pain essentially being the catalyst for the entire Journey tht the rest of the album outlines (obsessed w the fact that the next song is jaded like fr having these two songs one after the other is literally "fucked around/found out" gsfhjsh)
but all that being said not to b dramatic but this album destroyed me it rearranged something deep in my soul and i don't know who i was before it but i probably wont ever be the same :) i literally love these two so much im so appreciative of them its so rare to feel so Seen by a piece of media so to have an entire album hit so incredibly close to home for me and slap while doing so????? i feel so lucky . this entire album feels like taking the first step to address years of hurt and self destruction it feels like losing a friend it feels like finding yourself and i just . i love it so much
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