#last year they had covid and the year before we had to pretend he didn't exist

[yangjeongin]

why am i going to cry over hyunjin's bday live

#carly.txt #no i know why <3 #last year they had covid and the year before we had to pretend he didn't exist #it's so good to see him with birthday balloons and a cute lil cake opening presents finally #i know he's gonna be on a plane the us for most of his bday which isn't ideal 😭 but like... #idk dude it's making me emotionalsfgdsfgsdgsf #the way i became a stay back door era and have never seen him properly celebrate his bday #i hope he has an amazing bday weekend and day and ENTIRE WEEK i hope he gets to celebrate a lot #to make up for the past two shitty years #atlanta stays in particular please be good to him i want him to have so much fun #i love him so much dude this live is making me laugh and smile so much #he looks like he's having fun i'm so glad

[nootgi]

Pretend (2) - GOJOXF!READER

A/N:// Hi guys!! You really liked the launch chapter so I will be continuing this series <3 I was going to update sooner but I got sick with COVID. I hope you continue to enjoy and let me know any feedback. WORD COUNT : 2.9k TAGS: Fake dating, CEO Gojo, JJK AU, fluff/angst, arguments, reader is an actor, many characters from main story will show up. Part.one / Part.two

It has been a week since the meeting with Satoru and (Y/N) and Utahime is still seething. (Y/N) can see it in the way her manager angrily cracks open some walnuts for her. She was hunched over at the table, holding the nutcracker and muttering to herself how she imagines this one to be Satoru.

“Uta, the meeting wasn’t all bad! You shouldn’t be bad mouthing our boss so publicly!” The girl calls out worriedly, deciding the ever growing pile of walnut powder was enough. She sets down her book and walks over to the purple haired girl and pats her back reassuringly.

“Our boss! Like fuck that white haired mop is going to be our boss!” She spins around, her eyes look like they turned red and she is about to breathe fire.(Y/N) had no clue Utahime was childhood friends with the CEO of Infinite and his right hand man. Utahime was closed off about her past, not in a mysterious way but more it never came up that she has connections in the one of the best talent industries in the world. One fact that was missed coincidentally. Luckily (Y/N) never asked many questions, even when finding out about the connections she never pressed as to why Utahime never told her or used it to their advantage. She trusted her manager and Utahime couldn’t be more grateful to her little star. 

“That’s a little too mean, Utahime! You grew up with him, wouldn’t you be happy to see him after all this time?” She laughs as she soothes the frown on her manager’s face. Carefully taking a seat on the table, avoiding the walnut wasteland. 

“He’s the devil. There is no being mean to the devil.” Utahime looks up at the innocent girl in the eyes. She looks dead serious in saying this about Satoru and (Y/N) can feel the unease rise in her. 

“A devil I’ll soon be dating Uta…” The girl frowns and looks down at her hands. Her nails were done up in a beautiful french tip and adorned with beautiful rings but she didn't look there. She was looking at the back of her left hand, where soft plush lips were pressed so delicately at the end of their meeting last week…

Sat directly across the girl was Satoru, who was staring into her soul with his blue eyes. If he wasn’t so important, she would have thrown him a dirty look, much like her manager who is glaring at the men at the table. There were only 4 of them in the boardroom, (Y/N), Utahime, Satoru and a broad man with a fox-like smile who introduced himself as Suguru. ‘He’s pretty…’ the girl thought to herself as she studied him from the corner of her eye. 

It was mainly Suguru and Utahime who navigated the conversation, whenever Satoru spoke (Y/N) could swear she saw Utahime age another 5 years. As the topic of conversation moved from the plan to more legal jargon, (Y/N)’s mind checked out, she knew Utahime would handle it for her. And from the way Satoru is just sat studying her, he is the same with Suguru. 

“Actually why don’t the two of you go and get to know each other in the other room whilst we discuss this.” Suguru notices Satrou’s stare before Utahime could. He can see their rookie getting uncomfortable the more he stares without saying anything. She has such cute reactions, Suguru can tell Satoru will have his fun with her. 

“Yeah, it would be good for both of you to know what you’re getting into,” Utahime agrees surprisingly. She turns to her little star and nods reassuringly at her. She pats the girl’s back and leans in to whisper in her ear. “If he annoys you, tell me and I will deal with him.” (Y/N) pulls away with her eyes slightly wide in shock and lets out a little laugh. She nods back at Utahime and stands up to follow Satoru, who was already up and holding open the door to the connecting office room. 

“Don’t worry Utahimeee, I’ll look after your little star well!” Satoru says playfully, wrapping his arm around the poor girl’s shoulder. She looks up at him in slight shock, not used to such physical touch from someone she just met. Utahime couldn’t even throw her pen at Satoru, at risk of hurting her talent so she just settles for flipping him off. 

Utahime watches the door slowly shut, waiting till she hears the click to confirm she and Suguru were alone. She turns to Suguru and the frown on her face eases into a look of concern.

“They’ll be fine, I’m sure Satoru won't bite on the first date.” Suguru waves his hand with a playful smile but the serious look on Utahime’s face doesn’t ease up.

“That’s not what I am worried about.” Utahime picks up the contract that sits in front of her and sighs. “When this is all said and done, will she be protected like Satoru?” She looks into Suguru’s eyes and can see the way the man’s eyes dim. The silence lingered in the boardroom for too long. 

Silence was a common theme today as (Y/N) sat on the office couch, sat opposite to the grinning CEO. Her back was ruler straight and hands were folded politely in her lap. Meanwhile he was sitting in an armchair, legs spread comfortably and his head resting on a raised arm. The difference in their emotions was obvious, with how rigidly she sat and how at ease he acted.

“So what was your name again?” He tilts his head like a curious puppy but the dumb question had the girl distracted.

“You don’t know my name?” She couldn’t help but bluntly asks, taken aback with how clueless the CEO seemed.

“Sorry I don’t know rookie actors by heart, I have so much talent it’s hard to remember everyone.” Satoru shrugs with the same cocky smile on his face. He was enjoying (Y/N)’s reactions, how her polite demeanour is easily cracked by teasing. The way her cheeks puffed up in annoyance as she had to reintroduce herself to her new boyfriend. 

“Well my name is (Y/N)... and what was your name again?” She asks, copying the way Satoru tilted his head in curiosity. The smile on her face made it seem like she was innocent. As though she didn’t just come for Satoru’s ego.

“Oh she’s got jokes now? You should know my name already, I am your new lover after all.” He laughs, leaning forward in his seat as he engages more with the conversation. He was enjoying this.

“Lover? I never knew the CEO had the skill to make things sound so cringey!” She covers her mouth with her hand, feigning disgust at the white haired man. The smile behind her hand showed she was enjoying this back and forth as well.

“Cringey?” He almost shouts in offence.

“Cringey.” She repeats back with a laugh, clearly winning this childish game. There's a pout on Satoru’s face as she gets all her giggles out. Satoru noticed the heavy atmosphere of the office suddenly became lighter with her laughs. The pressure that he was under with this plan eased just a little as the two grew more comfortable. As the conversation went on, the polite speech went out of the window and they addressed each other with the comfortability that comes from people that have been friends for a while. 

They seemed to get lost in conversation for a while, talking about small things like their favourite colours or cats vs dogs. They don’t know how long they were speaking for but before they knew it Suguru and Utahime were in the room with contracts ready to be signed.

“Looks like you guys are getting on well.” Suguru smiles charmingly at (Y/N) to which she blushes profusely at. Satoru notices this, rolls his eyes and waves his friend over.

“Excuse me ugly fox, could you not poach my beautiful girlfriend.” Satoru says rudely, glaring playfully at his best friend.

“Satoru, could you not be so rude in front of our guests? No wonder your image needs work.” Suguru says through gritted teeth. He keeps his peaceful and charming image up in front of the rookie actress but Satoru can feel his annoyance from the hand he places on his shoulder. Satoru smiles up at his friend but from the girl’s point of view it looks incredibly forced. 

“So… Are we signing the contract today?” (Y/N) interrupts whatever moment the two friends were having, turning to Utahime to question her.

“Yes,” She sighs at two idiots before taking a seat next to her talent, “I am happy with the terms and conditions for us but you can read through and see if you app-”

“I trust you Uta.” (Y/N) interrupts her manager, looking up into her eyes with a delicate smile. Utahime looks at the girl for a moment, stunned, before smiling and handing her a pen.

“Really? I wouldn’t trust Utahime if my life depended on it.” Satoru’s voice shatters the cute moment the two were having and Utahime can finally throw her pen at Satoru. He dodges it, clearly used to attacks from his old friend. “Look, how could you possibly trust this violent woman!” The hand that (Y/N) places on Utahime’s lap stops her from lunging over the table and doing something she might (not) regret. 

The signing of the contracts was a quick affair, both parties being able to read the contract and having the chance to voice any concerns or negotiations. There weren't any changes to the contract that Utahime and Suguru proposed. On the first dotted line was signed Satoru’s name. (Y/N) couldn’t help but think how different his signature was to his playful nature. It was sharp and confident, she could feel the power radiating from it. ‘As expected, this is the power of a CEO!’ She thinks as she signs her name below his. Her signature was neat but the way the lines shake towards the end shows her nervousness. 

Suguru and Utahime watched with smiles and bated breaths. This was going to be the start of a whole new chapter in all of their lives. They have no clue how things will turn out but they all have optimism for a bright future. Suguru gathers the papers and checks over them one last time before tapping them against the table to form a neat pile.

“We look forward to our collaboration with you, (Y/N). Please look after him for me.” He says with a smile, ignoring the way the Satoru makes a noise of offence. He Looks at Suguru with a pout before his head snaps over to the girl as she speaks.

“I don’t think baby sitting was in the contract?” (Y/N) smiles at Suguru, also ignoring the sound of offence. 

“I think you’ll fit in just fine (Y/N).” Suguru laughs, liking the rookie already from how easily she adapted to teasing Satoru. Suguru leads the two girls out of the office and back towards the elevator. Satoru was following them along, standing beside the girl. The pout on his face never eased up as he watched the girl giggle and blush at Suguru’s charm. First Suguru gets him into this pretend relationship and then tries to steal away his pretend girlfriend. Satoru’s ego couldn’t stand for it! 

“We’ll contact you in a few days about the relationship announcement but if you need anything from us, please contact me.” Suguru stands by the elevator doors, addressing both (Y/N) and Utahime. The two girls were standing on one side of the doors and the two boys on the other side. 

“Thank you Getou, once I’m back at the office I’ll send over (Y/N)’s schedule-” Utahime bows slightly at Suguru with a smile. (Y/N) tries to listen into what the next steps are for her team but she is distracted by Satoru. The white haired CEO steps forward, his pout replaced with the same cocky smile he had on before. He takes the girl’s left hand in his much larger hand as he leans in close to her. 

“Since now you are my lover, please call me directly if you have any troubles.” Satoru says seriously, looking down into the girl’s eyes. His blue eyes capture her again and melt away the world so it’s only them. 

“I couldn’t possibly annoy Mr.CEO from his-” She says softly, the shyness in her voice apparent with the longer Satoru stares at her.

“Satoru.”

“Hmm?” She makes a noise of confusion when he interrupts her.

“My name is Satoru.” His smile never falters as he lays his charm down thick on her. (Y/N) is reminded of their conversation before and she laughs at finally getting his introduction.

“Well then, Satoru, I am in your care.” As she speaks, the CEO raises the hand he was holding to his lips, placing a soft kiss to the back of her hand. The girl’s carefree smile breaks a little as she feels the familiar red hot rush in her cheeks. The way his white eyelashes flutter open as he looks into her eyes has her seeing cherry blossoms blooming around Satoru. She is rendered speechless from such a simple action and she can feel her heartbeat in her ears. 

“See you soon, (Y/N).” He returns the girl’s hand back to her and throws her wink. He stands back up straight again and spins on his heels to walk away. He doesn’t look at Suguru or Utahime who were watching in shock/disgust at Satoru’s flirting. He ignores them all as he walks back to his own office, laughing to himself at the image of the flustered rookie. 

“That crazy bastard- Are you okay (Y/N)?” Utahime says after a beat of silence. She looks at the rookie who’s still stuck in the position Satoru left her. Her hand slightly raised in the air and lips parted in shock.

“Y-Yeah, I’m fine Uta.” She says, her voice almost a whisper. Any louder, her voice might crack and add to her embarrassment. She holds her left hand close to her chest as she walks into the elevator. The wink Satoru gave her lingered in her eyes like the light of a flash. Her eyes are trained to the ground until she sees the dress shoes of Suguru as he stands outside the elevator. Her eyes travel up to meet his eyes. The remnant heat of her blush was fading away but Suguru could still see the redness in her ears.

“This wasn’t a clause (Y/N) but you’d do well not to fall in love with him.” Suguru offers up his advice, he watches as the girl’s eyes widen and the elevator doors shut. Cutting off any reaction from Utahime. Suguru sees his reflection in the elevator doors and he sees how his smile has dropped into a serious frown. 

It has been a week since the meeting and Satoru hasn’t heard the end of Suguru’s scolding.

“Kissing the back of her hand like that? What were you thinking?” Suguru asks the man as he follows behind him after a meeting.

“Why is this such an issue? You were flirting proudly with her and she’s meant to be my lover.” Satoru shrugs and rolls his eyes. He was trying to downplay the move he made but in his head, the softness of her hand and the cute look of surprise on her face lingered in his head.

“Feelings will complicate this plan, Satoru.” Suguru reminds Satoru rather coldly. This pretend couple will only last a year before they call it quits. If any emotion infects this plan, it will be harder to maintain and the image they are trying to craft will be ruined. Satoru didn’t need reminding, he understood how much was riding on this plan but he couldn’t help himself from teasing the poor girl. He enjoyed seeing how free she was with her emotions, free to switch between different masks and how she can trust so easily. But in that enjoyment was a little green feeling. He didn’t like it, he had everything he wanted but was jealous of a rookie, a nobody in his world. It had him thinking if she was really the right pick for this? In this competitive world where anything can and will be used against you.

Satoru sits on his desk chair, leaning his head on his arm and sighing. Suguru stands in front of his desk, holding onto the files that will ‘leak’ and release his relationship with (Y/N). Satoru looks at the manila folder with wary eyes before snapping into his cocky routine.

“Come on Suguru, you know I will never fall in love.” Satoru looks at his friend, reminding Suguru of the promise Satoru made all those years ago. He doesn’t believe in love, it wasn’t for him. He has his scars from love and learnt his lesson. This wasn’t going to be a love story, this was just a plan. Suguru sighs in resignation and nods at his friend. 

“I remember. Now that’s out of the way, let's move forward with phase one. Hard launch.” 

When (Y/N) wakes up from her afternoon nap, her phone was overloaded with notifications. Floods of texts from friends and family as well as social media notifications overwhelmed her. She was confused about what was happening until a headline caught her eyes.

‘CEO PLAYBOY SATORU SETTLES DOWN WITH ROOKIE ACTRESS?’  ‘WHO IS THE MYSTERIOUS ACTRESS THAT TAMED THE WILD CEO?’ ‘ROSA ROOKIE SATORU LOVE TRIANGLE?’ 

The plan has started and there is no going back now. 

#gojo x reader #gojo x y/n #jjk x reader #fluff #fake dating #jjk au #pretend

[leqclerc]

honestly carlos also isn’t that impressive when you look at the calibre of drivers ferrari have hired in let’s say the past 2 decades… seb, alonso, kimi, micheal, barrichello are all either world champions or (for barrichello) finished at least 2nd in the wdc (and here we can include charles also!) so if we’re just looking at wdc positions carlos is the weakest ferrari driver in 20 years. it’s ferrari… the standards are different

anyw this is a bit divisive so i understand if udw to reply!

Hello 👋🏻😊

No worries! I see what you're saying. I think the thing with Ferrari is though... I mean, obviously they will always be a legendary marque with plenty of historical successes, and as much as one can pretend that doesn't move them, you can't deny the appeal of wanting to be part of that, wanting to experience a slice of that and be immortalized in the history books yourself. I also think there's a bit of a "I can fix her" aspect at play here, this tantalizing idea that you can be the one to restore Ferrari to end the title drought and bring the trophy back to Maranello, to do the one thing so many others failed to do.

Which kind of brings me to my next point which is that... legendary status aside, I think their stock has kind of fallen in the last few years. Particularly in that 2020-21 period where they came crashing down and then had to rebuild and they already knew they wouldn't be anywhere close to being championship contenders.

I mean every year we see the stats and the "it's been X years since Ferrari's last championship" stuff going around. The 2010s and early 2020s just haven't been a great time for the team. They've had some highs but generally they're probably remembered for the lows (unfortunately.) They've had two (three, if you count 2022) failed title bids that fizzled out before the end of the season. There's been a lot of staff turnover (including TPs), lots of chaos behind the scenes with people trying to do things their way in hopes of breaking the cycle (Binotto.) It's like it's always close but no cigar, if that makes sense.

So at the time they were looking for a replacement for Seb, let's say early 2020 (unbeknownst to us at the time, because the narrative was that they intended to stick with him and then Covid complicated things...) I think they 1. just were not an attractive option for drivers of a similar caliber/world champions. Max wasn't going to move after getting stuck in at Red Bull and Mercedes were having their heyday so Lewis wasn't about to walk either. The only other WDC on the grid at the time was Kimi iirc, whom they had just recently let go to bring in Charles. And 2. I think they were trying to sort of shake things up and almost forge a new identity. They took a chance on Charles, doing something they traditionally wouldn't have resorted to, bringing in a wet behind the ears driver in just his second year of F1. Of course he was their academy driver, he did sim work for them, test-drove their cars and was generally familiar with the people and the environment and factory and everything so it's not like they plucked him out of nowhere, but still, it was unlike them, and many pointed out that they were flipping the script with this move.

Again hearkening back to a point I made previously, on paper Carlos seems like a pretty solid driver and more or less along the lines of what they needed at that time. He generally had a good time at McLaren, he was beating Lando (a rookie but still) and was being praised for his professionalism and team player attitude (little did we know.)

I think the only other name that was mentioned as having credible talks with them at the time was Daniel, who maybe would've been more in line with what we came to expect from their signings (so a driver with more experience and actual race wins under his belt. Not WDC though.)

There was also very much this perception that they were going to go all in and build the team around Charles as their no. 1, so they didn't really need a senior driver he could learn from anymore (they already had that in Seb) but rather someone to back him up. (Obviously things uh. Didn't quite pan out that way but.)

I remember there was a stat going around about how Charles and Carlos were Ferrari's youngest driver pairing since like 1968, which is kind of insane. So I think they also kind of used that to launch their new era where they kind of tried to re-brand themselves as this team that's betting on young, fresh talent.

Now they seem to be on the up again with the development direction, new TP and a surprise juggernaut lineup for 25-26 so there's this sense (and hope) that they're heading towards building something akin to the dominant, iconic team of the early 2000s.

All in all it was a decently long partnership, especially considering the state of modern F1 and the near-constant silly season and people getting short-term contracts, lots of academy drivers waiting in the wings and stuff. Carlos himself was a serial team-hopper so to speak before getting the Ferrari seat, the longest he's been with one team so far in his career I believe? Will this lineup be considered a standout Ferrari lineup some 10, 15 years down the line? Probably not, especially sandwiched in between two WDC drivers and falling in this no man's land period with no titles and few wins (as of right now, who knows what happens this season). But all in all I think Carlos's four season stint with Ferrari is pretty much an accurate reflection of where they were at that moment in time.

#replies #anonymous #discussions and predictions #that whole mountain of text just to say i agree w you 😭 #ferrari will always be one step ahead of everyone in terms of like history and their legendary status #but to attract wdcs and generational talents you have to have something interesting to offer them #which wasn't really the case when they signed carlos so hes kind of a sign of the times in that respect #long post

[barkspawn]

My friend and I were talking about a scenario in which Seb decided to adopt the farmer's baby and we had a massive laugh on how Sam would be that "cool uncle" who just did stupid ahit to give Seb a heart attack.

Bruh what are kids. Also, I had COVID I'm sorry but brains, man.

Amelia was taking a few moments to catch up on some cleaning around the house. It took a long time to get used to being parents and it felt like it happened so fast. They applied and thought it would take years longer than it did, but they got remarkably lucky. 

Now, they had Autumn and were happier than they ever thought imaginable. Sebastian and Amelia were natural parents. Sebastian did turn out to be a little overprotective when it came to Autumn’s safety, but Amelia understood. 

She was wiping down the counter when she felt Sebastian’s arms slide around her waist, pulling her back into a hug as he kissed her cheek.

“Well, good morning to you, too,” she laughed, turning in his arms to steal a proper kiss. He hummed, definitely not completely awake yet. 

“Couldn't help it,” he teased, turning and looking over the house, “where's autumn…?”

She leaned back against the counter, bracing for the response, “she had a playdate with ‘Unc Sam’,” she frowned as he tensed, already walking toward his jacket, “Seb, he would not let her get hurt.”

“I've seen Sam and Vince play together,” he deadpanned, hand on the knob to head outside, “no broken bones or stitches. That's the goal here.”

Amelia laughed to herself, shaking her head before turning back to the counters. 

Sam and Autumn were down on the path to the bus stop. Sebastian nearly had a heart attack when he saw the girl on Sam’s hip while skateboarding. Sebastian didn't realize how dangerous those things were until he imagined… Well, he tried not to think about it. 

“Sam, what are you thinking?” Sebastian snapped, trying to keep his tone soft enough to not freak out his daughter. 

“Dude, it's fine. She loves it,” Sam pushed the last few feet, the girl's laugh echoing through the small area. 

“Why can't you take her to the playground like a normal kid?”

Sam laughed, shaking his head, “she's no normal kid! If she's gonna hang out with Uncle Sam, she's gonna be rad as–”

“Sam.”

“Right, sorry. Repeating words phase,” he nodded before looking toward the girl, his voice taking on a dramatic tone as he gave a nod, “right?”

“Right!” she giggled, Sam tickling her with his free hand. 

“Sam please,” Sebastian ran a hand back through his hair, “no skateboard.”

Sam rolled his eyes, stepping off the board before turning to the girl again with a silly voice, “daddy's being no fun.”

Autumn crossed her arms, though the smile remained as she tried to use a similar tone, “no fun!”

Sam laughed and looked over at Sebastian. When he saw how exasperated Sebastian looked, he laughed harder, shifting the girl so he held her under her arms, holding her up in the air as she squealed with joy. 

“Oh, you're trying to kill me,” Sebastian started as Sam pretended to let her go, play gasping as he caught her again. It was definitely an attempt to make Sebastian stressed and it was working. 

“Relax, Seb,” he relaxed and set her down, watching her run and skip around the skateboard, “you know I wouldn't let anything happen to her.”

“Until she wiggles or something and you don't catch her,” he groaned, the familiar pit of worry aching in his stomach. 

“Dude, I don't even actually let her go.” 

“Still.”

Sam sighed and bent to pick her up, throwing her over his shoulder, his grip firm on her legs as she burst out into another fit of giggles. Sebastian watched in horror as Sam walked her back onto the farm, bouncing along happily.

This is why his mom always warned him he would make her hair gray by 40. He’d have to apologize for that later. 

Sebastian followed along, watching as Sam and his daughter plopped down into a patch of grass and started playing with some toys. 

He needed coffee. 

He sighed and headed inside, Amelia already sliding a cup across the counter. He groaned as he leaned over the counter, propped up on his elbows, “we should look into life insurance.”

She looked taken aback, if not a little worried. Seb looked up and met her eyes, “Sam is going to stress me out into an early grave.”

She relaxed and shook her head, attempting to hide her smirk, “good thing I'm here to help you relax, hmm?”

He couldn't help but break a smile as he took a swig of his coffee. She made her way around the counter and stood on her toes to steal a kiss as he murmured against her lips, “you're going to be very busy helping me then.”

She smiled before stealing another kiss. Just as Sebastian moved to set his mug down and consider taking advantage of Sam watching Autumn, he heard a cry from outside, his heart dropping. 

“I'll kill him, I swear,” he was already out the door before Amelia could respond. She followed him out to the porch where she watched her husband freaking out. 

“What happened?”

Autumn was sitting in Sam’s lap, crying in small, heartbreaking sobs. 

“She fell and got a widdle boo-boo,” he pouted, Sebastian already kneeling beside them. She had a small red mark on her knee, the skin scraped just a bit though it wasn't bleeding. She reached out for him, crying now for her daddy. 

“Oh, sweetheart, let me see,” he took her and sat on the ground, sitting her in his lap, “oh, no! Do you want me to kiss it all better?” 

She sniffled, giving a quiet ‘mhmm’ before Sebastian bent and kissed the scrape very gently. He smiled at her then, autumn unable to hold back a smile in response. 

“All better?”

“All better!”

“Good,” he hummed and wiped tears from her eyes before he allowed her to run off, Sam watching alongside him as she played with Loaf. 

“She tripped, dude. I swear I didn't do anything,” Sebastian had stood up, brushing himself off before Amelia tucked herself under his arm. 

“You see why it's scary though, right? That scream is pretty universal. I'm worried one day it'll be more than a scrape and I won't be able to kiss it away.”

He watched his daughter as Amelia stood on her toes to press a kiss to his cheek, “I know, love,” she turned to Sam, who took a deep breath. 

“Yeah, can't lie, that was a bit scary,” he stood, stretching his legs, “but you handled it like a boss, dude. Who knew kisses made scrapes better? You never kissed mine!”

Sebastian laughed, shaking his head, “guess I just like her more.”

Sam started to protest, but looked over at the girl, “yeah, that's fair.”

“Would you kiss my scrapes?” Amelia teased, Sam's face shifting a bit to fake disgust as Sebastian answered without a second thought. 

“And then some. No scrape necessary,” he pressed a kiss to her forehead and laughed as Sam made a gagging noise.

“You don't have to torture him, Seb. He's watching her for free.”

Sam looked between them for a moment before his lip curled in disgust. 

“Ugh, I don't need to know. I have to go in an hour, go do whatever it is I wish I didn't know about,” he commented, his grin returning as the child bound towards him, tackling him in a hug with Loaf close behind with kisses. 

Amelia looked up at Sebastian before nudging his side to grab his attention back. She kept her voice low, “c’mon. We have an hour to chip away at that stress.”

He chuckled, his shoulders relaxing slightly at the idea of what was to come. 

“I can't decide if I want to shower or take you to bed,” he teased, smacking her ass playfully as they walked inside. 

“You could combine the two,” she hummed, walking into the bathroom, “shower with me.” 

The smirk she gave him made him thankful for Sam for the first time that day.

#sebastian sdv #stardew valley sebastian #stardew sebastian #sebastian stardew valley #sdv sebastian #sebastian x farmer #sam #stardew valley sam #sdv sam #sam stardew valley #sam sdv #stardew sam #sdv #sdv fanfic #stardew valley fanfic #stardew valley #stardew #barkspawn #barkspawn oneshot #oh look a one shot

[incarnateirony]

When Mary Manchin argued that SPN gets zero market testing, even Destiel, I already had the fucking receipts that we cleared 3 years later safely after much scrutiny.

When Jess of Mary Sue screamed at me that "the authors had no intention" of trying to take Destiel anywhere, early season 14, I stared at her like the unplugged alien she was, while she trumpeted for example how well she knew berens bc she sits at con tables with him but can never read his eyes rolling out of his head.

When season 15 started, i said at the start of the season we were going there. Because, well, it was the first thing he wrote, and his ONLY reason to stay, which is weird for not having intent. But anyway this "STOP GETTING PEOPLES HOPES UP" condescending garbage was so thorough that Natalie Fisher, a real life friend of Meredith Glynn, argued there wouldn't be a confession that year, only a few episodes before it aired, when we already had three layers of leaks, including the script wholesale and some international stuff, like me too/i you

The entire time they barked and barked and omg it happened. Then the ending wiped out and they laughed at my old "spec" along with that confession of roadhouse reunions and more, missing everything else matched up down to events and death order just to pretend they won something.

They screamed and denied anything was removed or omitted or cut then we got the scripts and the cuts. And then they screamed louder, and literally started thanking covid for destroying the ending to give them what they wanted, or as close as they could ever get.

Jensen's graphic designer stared me in the face and told me the pilot was fake when I had a list of like, 30 reasons 100 miles long it was real that they'd never get, and i told them and 2p0 and everyone they were wrong and gasp, they were wrong!! Go figure that winkyface no Danneel DMed you wasn't real, but whatever they sent you last week sure popped ur lid

So then 2P0 tried to hyperfixate on proving the pilot was gonna be dramatically different and way overblew getting shrill about the reshoots, so I went ~somewhere and within 2 hours confirmed the exact nature of the reshoots, which beyond a few additional fills when the whole group came back for ep 2 were mostly finished with the extended pilot shooting, and how small and minor those were--phrasing tweaks, framing and light mood adjustments. Boom, a week later screener drops, says the same damn thing.

This entire thing is a fools errand of dipshits not understanding WHO has reliable info about WHAT and think A Source Is A Source Is A Source, They Know Someone, Right? -- and like, no. now 2p0 out here trying to frantically retool his pilot dialogue less than 2 weeks before the pilot airs and got so fucking up his own ass about it he forgot there were other episodes to track.

Seriously guys. Follow the leak history there and realize just why 2p0 and co are treading water so desperately for a narrative to fix. For years they brushed all of the above events under the rug but it's time to consider them as a complete picture--both what the creatives were fighting for, and how absolutely fucking disconnected 2p0 is. even people with better contact like Jess don't know what the fuck they're doing. They won't tell their real friends like Natalie most of the time. And low ranking workers in one department do not inherently know the business machinations above their paygrade.

It's time for fandom to start boxing this off. to not fall for 2p0's nonsense blending con sizzle reals and official ads to try to make confusion. To delineate the departments and understand who has perspective on what. To know where to reach above that. And to look for caveats or deflections in the way authors speak.

If you guys weren't desperate for anti confirmation biases or bitter confirmation biases, you'd be embarrassed for EVER reading jensen's "a script got leaked" shit the way 2p0 did. he didn't say it was fake, he said it was different, and that's true, they had already revamped the axis mundi visuals even before the reshoots but the song remains the fucking same, dudes, cope.

Look real, real hard at which fandom leakers speak clearly with confidence on these issues, and which ones like 2p0 say a pile of nothing commital so later he can pull one of 5 options out and say he was right. No, we don't do that shit here. That's not being In The Know, that's you not even being able to sort out your fifth degree rumors, what the shit.

History matters here, folks. Don't buy a car with a history of breaking down, and don't follow a blog like 2p0 that perpetually does.

#apollo's curveballs #leak history

[thecarvingwitch]

Over the past 2 (?) years, since I have left this platform these things have happened, and I know this because I kept records:

I got into a serious car crash that gave me a traumatic brain injury and scars on my body

I was told falsely that I had breast cancer

I was fired

The best therapist I'd ever had broke up with me because she was leaving the center

I found out I had ADHD and was autistic

I fled my father's house and became homeless for a time

I became polyamorous

I went to the ER half a dozen times

I survived and saved an apartment complex of people from a house fire, while naked except for a dog collar

I took any job i could find, including waitressing and stripping

Got COVID. Again

I fell in love four times

I started journalling on TikTok

I got into an emotionally abusive relationship with a veteran I moved in with because the friend I was crashing with kicked me out and I'm still not sure why it ended how it did

That man put me in the ER

I started stripping, changed my name and my appearance

I fell out of love with this man

I lost my family

I was fired from waitressing and a married client 40 years my senior, from stripping, hired me the next day to make cabinets for him instead

He bought me a car

I flipped the car and he didn't care, he was worried about me

I fell deeply, deeply in love with him. I proposed two months in. He said yes.

We went to the Bahamas for work and he collared me. I said yes.

I found out that I have DID and realized that I was not who I was before

I fled my abusive relationship with his help. He helped me get my own apartment and for the first time I started to come out of survival mode and go into recovery mode

I lost my pet hamster, marble

I became monogamous. Began planning a wedding.

I became captain of a ship and an adoptive mother to a passel of kids

I learned more about myself and the other parts of myself than I ever thought there was to learn

We started healing. Our fiance was the driving force for this. The children called him daddy and me mommy

I think I might have had a miscarriage

Last march we found his father, dead in his home, having passed from old age and we supported him through it when no one else did.

We lost almost all of our friends

We made an ages old hunting cabin into a beautiful, comfortable home with him deep in the country and were starting a free rural mobile library and a free community pantry

Last week, a week before our first anniversary with him and a month before the wedding, we found out that our fiance was (pretending to cheat on us) to purposely drive us away because he was guilty over his legal marriage and devastated over his father's death

We split several new alters

One of the alters tried to commit suicide over our fiance. We survived. Our relationship did not. A circle of betrayal was initiated and we fled for our safety into the city at random with a go bag, staying with ex lovers and in hotels. We left our collar and our ring in the hotel bathroom.

We lost our husband, our job, our transportation, our stability, our future, and everything we held dear except for each other in the system

And now. We are here. Our lease runs out in February. We begin again.

Stay alive.

Keep fighting.

#oc

[punkrockgirlalmighty]

Something broke inside of Carlos and with a gasp he arched his head back, twisting a fist up into TK’s hair and pulling his head down as he craned up to connect their lips.

This was what he wanted; TK’s tongue seeking out his own, his hand curling around his hip as he pulled Carlos back against him, to swallow up the needy moans TK was letting out.

He wanted TK to latch on to the hollow at the base of his neck and leave his own mark there right next to the cross.

He wanted to be able to wear them both with pride.

They tumbled sideways onto the bed and Carlos rolled onto his back as TK straddled his hips, diving back down to keep kissing him.

A loud clanging sound from the kitchen had them snapping apart. Carlos pulled a pillow over his crotch as TK tried to fix his hair.  It took them both a minute to realise no one was coming into the room.

TK laughed nervously. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.”

“I wanted you to.” Carlos raised the pillow off of his lap to show TK what he had done to him. “See.”

“Carlos,” TK groaned. “We can’t do this.”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re both leaving again in a few weeks.” TK sounded frustrated.

“Can’t we just pretend until then?” Carlos knew he wasn’t thinking entirely with his upstairs head when he said it, and that it would inevitably lead to more heart ache when their time together ended again, but he also knew he wouldn’t regret it.

TK’s eyes raked over him, pensively taking him in as he considered what Carlos was suggesting until his mouth spread into a slow grin. “Yes. Yes. Please let’s do that.”

Then he was on him again, discarding the pillow to one side so he could connect their hips and grinding down. It was like no time had passed as Carlos let the taste and smell and feel of TK on top of him overwhelm him. It wasn’t until TK was kissing down his chest, his hands climbing underneath his shirt to push it up, that a thought struck him. “Have you been with anyone else?”

TK stilled and rested his chin on Carlos’ stomach, looking up at him from beneath alluring eyelashes. “Do you really want to know that?”

Carlos thought it about it for a moment. He definitely didn’t want to have to admit to TK that he’d been with several boys since him and it would shatter every illusion he was trying to create if he pictured TK with someone else. They had the holiday to be together and he had condoms, that was good enough for him.

He shook his head. “No, I don’t.”

“Me neither,” TK said before reconnecting his lips with Carlos’ skin.

There was another crash from down the hall and Carlos groaned. “We can’t do this here.”

TK sighed and started to pull away. “My dad isn’t working tonight, he’s at home too.”

They stared at each other despondently. Carlos thought about his car but he didn’t know anywhere he could drive them that they wouldn’t risk getting caught and it was too cold for it to be fun anywhere outside. Memories from senior year flooded him and he looked at TK hopefully. “Treehouse?”

TK’s eyes lit up. “Treehouse!”

.

.

technically not wednesday yet but I am moving back to Australia tomorrow and since it is tomorrow there already here is a snippet of the 'tis the damn season fic

also the last time I moved to Aus was right before covid and I didn't get to see my family or friends for 2.5 years and it turns out I am not a fierce independent bad bitch but a bitch who very much can't survive without hugging her mama at least once every 6 months so I have been super stressed the past week and couldn't work on this fic much. I am hoping once I am settled back in Australia I will get this finished (also I am a really slow writer - like it takes me all day to write a thousand words, how people churn out 10k a week I'll never know - so it is probably going to be a while until this is done because I have written 30k and am about half way through)

So anyway , please give a very anxious and panicked girl some validation :)

#wip wednesday #tarlos fic #wip #my fic #tarlos #911 ls fic #911 lone star fic

[rachelillustrates]

Art scam notice!!

Hello all lovely creatives. I recently almost fell prey to a scam hiding behind a high profile art job, so here’s a heads up, just in case.

I got contacted like a month ago by someone named David Harper, via email, representing a not for profit called STARS Nashville who was looking for an illustrator to do art for a workshop they had coming up about COVID prevention, for teenagers 15-17 years of age. He said they needed 8 illustrations, and would pay a total of $8,000 for the work and the exclusive rights to it.

I'd never been offered this high profile a job before, so my Wife and I checked the company's website, checked his LinkedIn, I talked to a friend of mine who has more experience with this sort of thing, to ask if it seemed like it was on the up and up, and all seemed well. I insisted on a contract, which he agreed to and allowed me to set up. I sent him that, he sent me a check, I insisted that he send me the contract back signed before I cashed the check and started the work, which he did, and then I mobile deposited the check last Thursday night.

On Friday morning, after I tell him I've deposited the check, he tells me half the job has been cancelled until after the vaccination process is over (whatever that means) and he/the company needs me to wire half the money back. The only thing we didn't do in checking up on him was call the company directly to make sure he worked there, since I didn't wanna be the douchebag who didn't believe him. We needed the money and I want, always, to just get to believe in people.

But that was uncomfortable, and weird, and he was being REAL aggressive and insistent that I had to wire the money back specifically, not just have the bank cancel the check and for them to reissue a new one. So I stopped answering him, called STARS Nashville, and found out that this is a scam - he/the team of people that are likely all pretending to be this person, have hit people under their name at least 4 times in the last 2 months.

So I called my bank, they are working on stopping the check, and today I took printouts of all the emails we exchanged and all the texts, plus the contract, and the check and the envelope it came in, to the cops. Just to report it - they asked if I wanted to press charges, but David Harper doesn't exist.

But hopefully having given them what I have will maybe, maaaaaybe help them save someone else from this situation down the line.

And hopefully mentioning it here will help someone catch him before he takes from them, too.

🌼 Please reblog and signal boost. 🌼

#personal #art scam #fraud #signal boost #artists on tumblr

[actuallyanansi]

Do all of them except you switch two answers and don't say which ones

ask and ye shall receive

Yellow: i want to live somewhere with decent public transportation, a large public library, and an international airport nearby, ideally with few cops and fewer natural disasters.

Orange: when i'm not in bed, i usually want to be in bed. when i am in bed, i usually want to still be in bed, but at a nice hotel.

Lilac: my dream is to be in an unfamiliar city with striking features, good food, and a long history, alone, with an internet connection and enough english or french to get by. barring that, a beach resort is fine.

Beige: picture it: two guys, curly hair, perfect smiles, and i was making out with both of them surrounded by soft white linens. people kept walking through the background and interrupting, but they never stayed too long.

White: he was a vegan jock i met sophomore year on a local campus app, and his roommate had just moved out. because i lived at home, way off campus, and never hung out with anyone, our hookup was the first time i had actually seen a dorm room at the college i attended. i remember vividly that his mouth tasted like wet dirt, and i lied to my parents about where i was a lot over the week we spent together—not because it really mattered, but because i could. our whatever we had ended...poorly, but what a rush those first few days were. after he ghosted me, i downloaded grindr.

Purple: he was almost miraculously kind (and also very cute), he took my concerns about covid safety seriously, he bought me dinner on j*ff b*zos' dime, and he let me subject him to the incredible pinoy drama gaya sa pelikula (the best limited television series of 2020, argue with your mother). we still talk daily, and i'm so thankful i met him ☺️

Tangerine: physically, i don't have much of a type. i tend to like guys who are grounded and even-keeled, but interesting enough to keep up with me in conversation. guys who can translate those conversations into making out on the couch. guys with rich inner lives who enjoy my attention without needing it, who enjoy giving me attention in a way that isn't just compulsive. guys who are smart when i am stupid

Gray: he was kinda dumb and probably toxic, and i tell myself i didn't know better at the time, but i did! he also gave me strep 💜 (and i still went back 💜)

Green: i was in the car with my aunt and my dad. he was driving us home from visiting nana in hospice. there was a rainbow over I-75 that lasted for miles. they discussed the details of her car insurance, the will we couldn't find, how my uncle, my dad's twin brother, was supposed to inherit her little house. we were still pretending to hope she would wake up; we were no longer pretending to hope she would wake up. my dad pulled off the highway to stop at a wendy's. we had gone without food for most of the day. the three of us ate in the car and spent a few minutes talking about the new strawberry frosty. my aunt had used a coupon to get hers for free. at some point, we kept driving. there was nothing left to talk about. the rainbow was gone by then.

Gold: he was a friend of a friend, and we spent a few weeks carefully circling the elephant in the room before we finally admitted we were into each other. it was extremely goofy how long it took us to work up the courage to even kiss, but i also don’t regret it. he was a sweetheart, and it’s hard not to think back on it fondly ☺️

Black: as a child, for some reason i knew how to pronounce the word nazi before i knew how to spell it. for some reason after i learned how it was spelled i assumed people had been pronouncing it wrong, and i tried to "correct" it while talking to my mom. the way she laughed…i will never recover, i fear 😔

Blue: i cannot remember the last time i spoke to someone i knew in elementary school. baruch hashem 💜

Magenta: around the age of eleven or twelve, i used to legitimately wonder whether my brother would grow up to meet the requirements for the antichrist, and then i'd feel intense guilt about it

Red: i write poetry against my better judgment. i read, sometimes. i watch video essays. i play piano. i cook, i bake, i listen to podcasts, i doomscroll. i start new obsessions and drop them.

Violet: bestie i didn't even plan on attending the college where i did four years of undergrad, so i'm really not pinning too much hope on any specific school in the future. that being said, i am begging all wealthy potential patrons to make grad school feasible. so mackenzie scott, if you're reading this,,

Brown: our culture puts so many expectations around traditional relationships that it's hard not to feel exhausted, and historically i'm also fairly bad at them. fwbs usually offer less risk and more reward, but also i'm trying to move beyond the idea that either of these has to look like anything in particular.

Peach: i've never taken a class from her per se, but mariame kaba has had a greater impact on my education more than just about any other individual person. as far as actual professors go, dr. jen cohen was a pretty good one, and the only econ professor i had who told the truth about how capitalism worked. (thanks for letting me sit in on your class when i wasn't really supposed to!)

Pink: anansi has such a vast mythology and is kind of an aspirational figure in a lot of ways. (not the part about being a spider.) it's about the subversion of the presupposed order of things, the capacity for gracious failure and the potential for unexpected success, the shaping of a story through its telling and retelling...

#ask meme #etherealcalamities #zinandour #a lot of these could technically double as answers to another question but i only switched one pair on purpose so i hope that qualifies #also a lot of these are just me being gay #make of that what you will

[rachbabe6-blog]

11/10/2022

Today marks a year since Keith passed away from COVID.

This day a year ago I did not update my Facebook in the afternoon and evening.

I got a call early in the morning from his care team.

They told me that I need to get up there today.

That Keith was not going to make it and I had to make a decision to take him off life support. I kept telling them that I would be there the next day but in reality I didn't want to face the fact that they were telling me he was going to die. On top of the fact that I as a mother had to make that decision to take him off life support. I could not wrap my brain around that. I went back to bed and tried to pretend it all the way.

It's a weird feeling because reality told me that I needed to face what was happening but I wasn't allowing myself to fully soak it in or comprehend that he was beyond helping, that he was beyond anything they could do medically, that he was already gone.

I finally made a phone call in the afternoon and they told me that if I did not get there that day that most likely he would die overnight and I would not be able to be there during his last moments.

I made the hard phone calls to my other children.. Just the older ones because I didn't want the young ones to have to go through the visual aspects of losing their brother. All three of the older ones wanted to be there in his final moments. I try to prepare them for what they were going to see.

Keith had gotten worse overnight though. When we walked up to his room I noticed through the glass that his eyes were wide open which was so unusual because he had been in a paralytics sedated state for so long that I hadn't really seen his eyes open like that. There was no blinking at all. One of his eyes did partially open a few days before he passed away and I think that was that day that he lost brain function. He was no longer responding to neurological exams.

I walked in and asked the nurse why his eyes were open and she said we cannot get them to close.

Both of his eyes were partially clouded over. I had never seen anything like that in my life. The breakdown of his skin where the tubes had been was apparent. He was covered in a peticile rash which wasn't there the day before. They had taken his feeding tube out and he was hooked to the ECMO and ventilator still.

We waited for his sister to get there. We were pulled aside into a room. We all sat around a large table. My older children and the whole care team. I don't know how I stayed so poised through it all. I made it clear that I knew that Keith was no longer there. I understood that his organs were shutting down and then his brain function was gone. I thanked everyone of them for the quality care they gave my son, for listening to me, for fighting with me, for being honest with me.

I definitely cried. I think we all cried.

We went back to the room and I held Keith's hand and I sang to him. You are my sunshine My only sunshine you make me happy when skies are gray You never know dear how much I love you please don't take my sunshine away.

My oldest son came up to the bed and he gave Keith permission to stop fighting. This was something I could not verbally do the whole month he declined. I built him up saying he was strong enough that he could fight this and that they were doing everything they could to save him but I could not tell him to give up. I'm glad Seth did though. I think Keith needed that. There was nothing more that could be done to save him.

I remember my oldest daughter saying "I forgive you and I hope you forgive me too" She broke down and Seth comforted her. Those two had a rift and I think they both needed to make peace with eachother.

I was so worried about Paul because his narcolepsy and high emotions could cause cataplexy. After about an hour we decided it was time. They shut off the volume to the machines. They unplugged his ECMO and then took out his tube for his ventilator. We watched him take his last breath. You feel like you can't stand up. Feel like the whole world is closing in on you and the pain is agonizing. I ran my hands through his hair I touched his face and I apologized. I told him I was sorry over and over because so many times in his life I tried to save him and in that moment I feel like I failed him. I thought of our Rue cat who passed away. I thought of an old co-worker of his, his grandparents and great grandparents and wondered who was there to greet him on the other side.

There was more to this day. There was more to that moment but I can't share those.

I didn't know how my children were going to handle it. I didn't know how my younger kids would react to seeing their brother in a coffin. Those moments, their faces, their reaction I can never forget. We have lived a year without him and it's been so difficult not to have his crazy vibrance in our lives.

The only solace I get is knowing that he is in a good place.

I miss him something fierce. I want a hug. I want to listen to him talk and talk and talk. I want to go out to lunch with him. I want to hear his laughter.. his huge bold infectious laughter. I want him back.

Today it has been a year.

Today we will do our best to keep his memory alive. Today we will do our best to spread kindness, love and appreciation in his honor.

We will love you forever and ever Keith.

#keithwisecup #covidloss #covid #covid covidloss

[ebdanon]

(part 2) My dad caught COVID on the plane back. Which meant he couldn't attend the wedding-related "meetings" we planned with the parents. Which made him unbearable. Both sides were trying to make the whole thing as cheap as possible (the parents pay for weddings here)- the cheapest menu, venue, music, everything. I don't remember a lot of things from the planning. But at one point they got so overbearing and trying to undermine everything we just gave up. In our country, the bride's parents buy the wedding ring for her husband, and vice versa. We were so sick of their behavior, that we decided to get ridiculously expensive wedding bands since both sides wanted to show off how much money they had. Because they rushed everything, we ended up married 6 weeks after the proposal. There were about 30 people, all of them mandatory for weddings (there would have been more people if no one was in a rush but not everyone can get a last-minute plane ticket). I managed to get all of one friend to attend, my husband had no friends. Because the parents planned the guest list and we said only the core mandatory people, his parents didn't even ask if he would be inviting any friends. My parents paid for my dresses for the few different official events with the in-laws that tradition demands. My husband's parents (who again, knew about this for a year and a half already, were complaining they were running out of money) got him nothing. Official events include family dinner at my place, and family dinner at his place - only parents and siblings and their partners. Then we did the church ceremony with the 30 people, with a lunch at a restaurant afterward. The actual marriage certificate we got two weeks later on our actual anniversary, and we had lunch after with the 10 people in attendance. The restaurants were shitty both times. Since we lived out of town and were busy with work, our parents had to check which places we could book for the set date. They made a list of the cheapest places in town, and they're all cheap for good reason. Terrible interior, bad service, cheap food, and barely any space. They also made a list for the music, and did the same thing again - listed the cheapest bands which had like three people in them. Thankfully we handled the photographer so the photos were amazing. I worked with a florist for the decoration which made the place a bit nicer, but still pretty shit.

I never wanted a traditional wedding. I just wanted to skip the dumb and outdated traditions, get a marriage certificate, and have a small gathering at a nice venue. Well, we skipped most of the traditions. The traditions I hate include the young unmarried men in the family hiding the bride in her house and only giving her up in exchange for money from the groom and best man. There's shit like dancing on tables, a couple of other "money in exchange for the bride" things, and copious photos of the bride giving gifts to her future in-laws family members. After the wedding, everyone goes back to the groom's house where the bride is supposed to dip her finger in honey. oil? (I forget) and draw crosses on the door to her new home, and then the party continues. My MIL insisted I do that one, my FIL filmed it and sent it to my parents. Because no one went to the groom's house because we weren't doing that part.

I remember one conversation I had with my narcissistic grandma the day before, who insisted we still do all that "giving away the bride for money" in the restaurant itself. This is the same woman who pretended to have a psychotic break a week before the wedding and spent a few days in the hospital. We know she pretended because the doctors told us as much, but they still kept her for "observation" to calm her down. She pretended she didn't recognize anyone or anything, but was magically fine when my uncle called her up.

And then I was married and we spent the rest of the month living with my in-laws (as per tradition) to get all the documents sorted and get the marriage certificate. My parents gave us a huge chunk of money as a wedding gift, and his parents promised us half of the house they own (I have a recent story on this I'll share another time) as the other half would go to their daughter.

Living with them was when I learned how big my MIL's drinking problem was. She would go on these screaming rants about how my parents were master manipulators and planned everything how they wanted it to be, screaming at my husband for being weak-willed and getting fucked over according to her. My husband and I would go over to my parents, and the next day my MIL would be screaming about how we went over to get instructions on how to fuck up everything. It was even worse when she was drunk. We got everything with the documents sorted and got the hell out of dodge as soon as we could to our apartment. And we didn't speak to each other for a month and a half after that. Just trying to decompress and destress from the shitstorm we went through. When we finally started talking to each other again and started to relax, we spent a couple of weeks going over the shit that went down, which was stressful again. Finally, we went back to normal, the stress went away, and we both got incredibly sick. It was like the high adrenaline from the stress was keeping us going until we took a breather and we both crashed. While mine was a chronic flare-up, my husband's was a brand new thing and we spent the next four months going to over 40 doctors to figure out what it was. That's a whole 9 shitty shitty months that were supposed to be incredibly happy. We had tons of plans that we had to put off or completely cancel due to the drama from our families. And when the dust settled, and they tried to reminisce about the "wedding", all I told them was that I was just grateful to be invited. Because none of it was for me. The only things we got to organize were the photographer and the florist. It was like the random small tasks you would give to someone because they have free time and those things aren't too big of a deal so they can't fuck them up too badly. I only have a vague idea of why they were rushing everything - our original plan was to get the certificate and buy people lunch, we'd do the church ceremony and everything else at a later time when venues would be available, which was likely months later. We were planning on moving abroad, so everyone was likely panicking that we would never get married in a church if we didn't do it then and there. But these are just assumptions from throwaway things I've heard since then. Our travel agent actually had the dream little wedding that I had wanted a week after we did. The location, music, decor, menu, hell, even everyone's outfits and the weather, everything was perfect, just how I wanted it to be. I just wanna say I'm happy for her, even if I couldn't, I'm happy someone else got to do that whole idea. And I'm sure it took months of planning which we didn't have for some mysterious reason.

Oh, and as soon as the photos of us were shared online, I started getting phone calls from people asking if I was pregnant because it happened so fast. I started joking that I would start sending people my used tampons to just avoid coming up with an explanation of why the rush happened.

Speaking of pregnancy I just remembered, that as soon as we walked out of the church, my and his parents wished us a happy life and a baby as soon as possible. I laughed and told them that would require some sort of higher power because it was medically impossible at the time, and my dad said "Accidents happen".... Both sets of parents knew I had issues with my hormones that basically make me infertile until they're fixed. And I'm keeping some of them in check with birth control. So even if I stop taking it, I'm still infertile, I just don't get periods without birth control. But sure, accidents happen lmao

That's as much as I could summarize and remember, this happened almost two years ago. I'll be sharing more MIL-specific lore as soon as I can.

can i fist fight your entire family? ill pay for my flight too because holy FUCK??????????

#this was a CRAZY ride to read oh my god. #im so sorry all of that happened this sounds like an absolute nightmare #please tell me you and your husband have access to mental health resources because wow #this would turn me into the joker im so serious. like i would become a cartoon villain to these people #idk if its an american thing or just my family but my family is so hands off about this stuff??? #like theyre just like ok tell is when and where to show up thanks. #i would have a migraine for the next eternity im so sorru #asks #lore anon

[savetooru]

departures

to a-mâ, whom i love deeply: you wouldn't know this, but the thing that kept me religious the way most people understand religion was you. every night i prayed to my little bedside god that all four of my grandparents would live forever. i did this consistently and with fervent hope that the naive persistence of my pleas would exempt me from the rules of life. i stopped praying maybe three years ago. or four, give or take. when dad's mom got hit with covid and we couldn't see her until all that was left was ash, i feared asking god for anything else and not getting it would morph me into someone evil. a truly terrible thing: when you fell ill with cancer, it forced the opposite of me. i wasn't ready to wheel you to the radiation center, or to help the nurses turn you over in your sleep. being gentle was not a choice i made willingly. i've said this before, but i'd kill every good part of me if it meant you could have stayed healthy. i brush your hair away but i can’t quite look at the thinning visage of your face. i worry someday i won't remember your laughter lines but i don't want you to see me cry. i know what it's like to be sick. you don't get a choice in any part of it. not how long you've got to fight and not who gets hurt by it. grandpa, who never really cared about pictures before, makes me take multiple when you manage to sit up long enough to be hugged. he talks about the day you'll get better, and how we'll drive up to the province, to pampanga, where the air is fresher and you breathe easier. mom and i laugh about how sweet he is but it's getting harder to pretend every click of the shutter doesn't sound like a whisper goodbye. there is a stage of grief which they call bargaining where one often begs god, the universe, or some higher power for a loved one not to leave or have left. but i'm not sure what exactly i should beg for tonight. the way i see it, we are always leaving. in the language of our predecessors, the first sentence i ever learned to string together was guâ bêh khi' lo'— hokkien for i am leaving. i used to say this to every elder relative at the end of every gathering; it may very well have been the last thing i said to either of my paternal grandparents before they passed. but for the most part, my leaving was not the end of things. parting ways led to countless more meetings. what to ask for, then, when you know that to leave is also to live in a perpetual state of being: warm and palms sweaty as i read at your bedside, laughing as you walk into the pantry because you forgot exactly what you went in for, hair trimmed neat and short after a runaway trip to the stylist that involves fooling me and scaring us all. what to beg for, when you've given me so much? i don't want to bargain with anyone for anything. i've got nothing worth half the life you're still living with me right now. (once, when we were alone and watching a rerun of barbie hsu's meteor garden, you wept while telling me that you hated it here. your sisters had all left, flown abroad to settle in the states; but you knew i was going to be born so you chose to stay. i remember being eleven maybe, thirteen at most— and so confused. didn't you love grandpa? what about your daughters? your sons? not just mom but all my uncles and aunts? what about the garden with your precious orchids and the wok you use to make all your fried rice? nevermind me. so much of you is here, why would you ever want to leave?) all i can do is write this and think of you as you lie asleep on a hospital bed while i feel a million, bajillion miles away. i don't think mom's got it in herself to hold up the phone to show me your face; but i swear i'm with you this time. if i could say anything to you i would tell you i get it now, ma. that wasn't what you meant. anywhere you want to go, ma, let's go.

#005 #still prayed for the first time in what must be over a thousand days

[beardedmrbean]

A murderer who led a man to his death and livestreamed the killing of a cat months before has been jailed for a minimum of 24 years.

Scarlet Blake, 26, hit Jorge Martin Carreno before pushing him into the River Cherwell in Oxford in July 2021.

The judge said a Netflix show about killing cats "played a part" in Blake's plan. She was found guilty of murder at Oxford Crown Court last Friday.

Her trial heard she had been on the streets looking for potential victims.

Blake had already admitted a criminal damage charge in relation to the cat.

The Ministry of Justice said Blake, who is transgender, would serve the sentence in a men's prison.

The court previously heard how she arrived in the UK from China aged nine, coming out to her parents as transgender at 12.

She said it "made my father really unhappy and my mother as well" and "caused a large emotional rift".

Jurors were told how Blake, formerly known as Alice Wang, had an "extreme interest in death and... harm" that "went beyond mere fantasy".

Prosecutor Alison Morgan KC said Blake found "sexual gratification from the thought of violence and the thought of death".

She previously told jurors Mr Carreno, a Spanish national working at the Mini plant in the city, had been on a night out drinking with colleagues after Covid restrictions had been lifted.

The 30-year-old later became separated from his friends, and possibly became lost, before having the "great misfortune" of bumping into Blake.

The court heard she led him to a secluded riverbank, hit him over the head with a vodka bottle, attempted to strangle him and then pushed him into the water where he drowned.

Warning: This story contains graphic details that some readers may find upsetting.

Blake previously told the jury about an online relationship that developed with Ashlynn Bell, another trans woman, in the US.

She said killing the cat was something she "very much didn't want" and claimed she killed the pet to please Ms Bell and only pretended to enjoy it.

But the court heard how she dissected it and put it in a blender, taking "grotesque pleasure" in doing so.

In the video of the livestream, The New Order song True Faith could be heard in the background, which the court heard was in homage to the Netflix documentary Don't F*** With Cats, in which a man kills kittens before filming the murder of a person.

Passing sentence, Mr Justice Chamberlain KC said: "You told the court it had nothing to do with the documentary, I am sure that this was untrue and the documentary played a part in your own mind in the link between killing a cat and killing a person."

Mr Carreno's two brothers read a statement to the court and said the extent of their grief was "impossible to express".

"We were triplets, born together, grew up together - we were best friends. Jorge lit up any place, he was always spreading joy. He was, above all, a good person," they said.

"Scarlet Blake has shown no remorse for her actions, making it even more difficult to process. She has taken the life of Jorge for her own sexual pleasure. It is deeply disturbing to know."

Reading a tribute to the court, Mr Carreno's mother, Carmen, added: "Jorge was not only an exemplary child but also an exceptional being.

"This loss feels like a traumatic, devastating blow, leaving a void impossible to fill. Going through the pain of losing a son, a brother, under such tragic and unjustified circumstances, is a trial no family should face. Today his absence leaves a deep wound in our hearts."

In his closing remarks, Mr Justice Chamberlain said the Carreno family had sat through the trial "with impressive dignity".

Passing sentence, he said the defendant had a "clear sexual motivation" for the killing.

He said: "I am sure you did derive pleasure from killing Jorge, as you had from killing the cat.

"You revelled in what you had done, returning at least twice to the scene to take photographs, and made conscious use of your status as a murderer to secure the admiration of others who shared your interests in harm, death and killing."

Senior investigating officer, Det Supt Jon Capps, previously said there had been aspects of the case that had been "truly disturbing" and jurors would be offered support due to the nature of the evidence.

Blake, of Crotch Crescent, Oxford, was jailed for life with a minimum term of 24 years for the murder.

She was sentenced to four months imprisonment for causing unnecessary suffering to a protected animal and two months for criminal damage - both to run concurrently.

#nunyas news

[regenderate]

15 and 31 for the fic asks :)

15. What’s your favorite AU that you’ve written?

ohhh my god unfortunately my favorite aus are all still wips. like i love tattoo au but like. well i think as far as concept goes my favorite au is the 90 day fiance au where jack, rose, and thirteen are stuck in england and the tardis is stuck in the us and instead of like. doing anything that makes logical sense they're like "okay well we're immortal anyway so we might as well take our good sweet time" and they do a series of green card marriages (jack poses as a us citizen, he marries rose, rose gets her citizenship and divorces him and then marries thirteen) and they go on 90 day fiance. the story is told through episode transcripts and news articles and such and i haven't figured out how to execute it yet but i want to show the audience like. slowly figuring out that these guys are weird. (i also want to set it like. just after covid lockdowns start to ease up so i can have an exchange in one of the episodes like "how were we supposed to know there was going to be a pandemic? it's not like we're time travelers" because of course they are time travelers and they just didn't remember)

my other favorite au (also a wip) is this like. thirteenyazrose thing that started as a fake dating au where rose is like. being hit on at work and thirteen is a new hire who comes up and is like "hey get away from my girlfriend" but like she does her threatening little growl But Also rose and yaz have been dating for years and so when rose tells this to yaz yaz is like "okay well if she's pretending to date one of us she's got to pretend to date both of us" and everything snowballs from there. this one also involves the pandemic because i was thinking about how canon yaz and rose both spend a lot of time away from the doctor and i think it would be interesting to adapt that to a human au by having the doctor be doing some kind of study abroad and not be able to come back on time. but this one has like a ton of prequel material of yaz and rose getting together but all of it is like. really rough around the edges and self-indulgent and not really like. in good shape yet to publish. and i'm having to rewrite the single chapter i had of the main fic because i remembered about making rose a mechanic. so now it's going to be where rose and human thirteen are mechanics and yaz is an emt. but like this au is my favorite because it's like. a comfort fic at this point it just is like a little home to me so i don't know when i'll ever post it but i do love it

31. What’s your ideal fic length to write?

ough this has actually changed in the last year! i used to mostly write shorter stuff, but lately i've had a ton of trouble keeping anything short, everything i've written has expanded a ton. which i think is a good thing, i've been adding a lot more depth and detail to my works. like at one point i looked at like. a first kiss that i wrote when i was fourteen and compared it to a more recent one and literally the more recent one was like. whole paragraphs longer. which might also tell you how many people i'd kissed at fourteen but anyway. i've been enjoying the really long fics, my current long wip (tattoo au, aka when i run away (you're who i run to)) is at 75k and counting. but those fics do require a lot of commitment-- i love writing that length but i can only sustain one at a time and there's always a risk that i'll lose interest in it or ability to write it partway through. i've been trying to finish stuff or at least write super far ahead before i post too. so anyway i think my ideal length for like. regular posting is somewhere in the... 7-20k range? long enough that it feels meaty but not so long that it takes a huge commitment to write.

huh these were long but in my defense if you've read my authors notes you should expect me to be Like This

#lifeblogs #ask game #thank you for asking <3

[the-lady-writes-what]

I had a really shitty day. Everything was going fine, but then a couple of subpar human beings decided to make their mission to make everyone around them as miserable as they are.

Context: I got a job a month ago at a pizzeria (and no, I won't be disclosing the name of it)

First, some dumbass woman orders a pizza using the wrong address. I go to the address on the order, and it's an empty house in the middle of some projects. I have no issue with delivering to government housing. I've met generous, kind people who live there. My issue stems from the fact that a) it's hot as Satan's scrotum outside, b)the fucking apartments are all empty, and c) I do not have time to sit and wait forever because I have better things to do. They're devoid of human habitation. And I'm sitting in a parking lot for 10-15 minutes like an idiot. And she has the audacity to get at US, ie the store, because she hadn't changed the address on her app even though she hadn't lived at the address on the order FOR OVER A FUCKING YEAR. According to my manager, as I wasn't there when it happened, this bitch swerved into the parking lot of the store, came in, and started fake coughing and sneezing and saying she had COVID. From what I understood based on what my manager said, she wasn't remotely sick and thought it was fucking hilarious to pretend to infect a food establishment with COVID because the dumb bitch couldn't be bothered to communicate with me when I tried calling her or even change the address when she placed the fucking order.

But this was honestly more humorous than making me upset. I have to laugh at the audacity of some people. She was a delight, mostly because I didn't have to directly contact her (even though I tried calling her, left a message, and left a text but she wouldn't pick up the phone for this humble pizza peasant). The next guy was not so delightful.

My last delivery of the day should have gone smoothly. I followed the directions to go to the back door and call when I arrived. I went up to the back door, called the number on the order, and the man who picked up was the most drunk, ornery foul-mouthed person. I don't mind swearing sprinkled here and there for emphasis or catharsis. What I don't like is directly swearing at people for no goddamn reason. The man had some kind of machine or bad reception or something, so instead of getting to where he could hear me, the man proceeded to be the biggest ass of the day. He started swearing at me. He said something along the lines of "You've got the wrong fucking address, you stupid motherfucker" and hung up. This is very triggering for me. I won't go into any details to the cause of this, but having any older man yell, be aggressive with me, or curse at me will send me into a panic attack. I don't just dislike it, it will literally send me into panic mode. I was shaking when I started walking back to my car. I was about to call my manager at tell him that I wasn't going to be able to make the delivery, when the man's wife (or cousin, whatever, I don't know that manner of relationship nor do I care at this point), calls me back. We exchange pizza for money and I happily went on my way. She was nice enough, if you disregard the fact that she didn't even acknowledge that her husband/boyfriend/whatever just verbally abused me over the phone FOR FOLLOWING THE DIRECTIONS ON THE PIZZA ORDER or even apologize for his behavior. I didn't have a tension headache before the incident, but I sure fucking do now.

And to top it all off, I ran out of money so me and my sister could eat something decent and I won't be able to get paid again in cash until the next time I got to work.

Fuck me, I guess

#rant time #humans are awful #be nice to retail and food service people