#like andrew never thinks neil DIES lol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ninyard · 3 years

Note

i want to know ANYTHING and EVERYTHING about the andrew meets neil as stefan au

YES PLS OKAY

(holy shit this was supposed to be a HC ramble/snippets from the fic but uhhh….here’s a mini fic instead????? The actual fic I wrote isn’t even set back in California it’s set in PSU??? This was supposed to be short backstory!!!!!! Anyways lmk if u want the foxes stuff lol Enjoy <3)

Neil had natural looking ashy blonde with green eyes at the time, no older than 14 years old, going by the name Stefan Montgomery. Him and Mary ended up in a motel in Oakland for a couple weeks, regaining their footing after a close-call somewhere in Oregon.

Mary had hit Neil a gnarly heavy-handed blow after he forgot which name he was using in Eugene. Was it Sam? Or Dylan? Or had it been Joseph? A nice inch wide cut sat where his perfect court tattoo would sit, just on the turn of his cheekbone below the corner of his eye, bordered by a healing purple-brown bruise. Stefan was born on the border between California and oregon, stolen from a waiter at a pit stop diner, who didn’t let their coffee cups go empty as they mapped out where to go next.

He had met Andrew by chance; Stefan had been sitting on the bottom of the metal stairs that led up to the floor they were staying at. Mary was having a shower, dying her hair, becoming Georgia, perfect mother, a beautiful, average woman. He was people watching, looking at the cars pulling in and out of the car park, making up his own stories about who was who, what their names were and if they were worth stealing when they inevitably moved on. Andrew hung around the motel because just behind the building was an old, decrepit playground that’s should’ve been foreclosed years ago. Nobody ever used it, so it was a quiet place for him to be alone. He’d been walking through the parking lot after having just grabbed a chocolate bar or two from the vending machine when he stopped in front of Neil.

“What happened to your face?” It was quiet, barely a sentence, not big enough of a question to be intrusive or over-stepping.

“I’m a boxer.” That was the lie he’d been using for a few days. “I had a fight a couple days ago.”

You see, Stefan was a name Neil didn’t want to remember, like a bitter memory he forced himself to forget. It was just before Mary’s paranoia began to spiral even worse that it had already been. Stefan was keep your head down, we won’t be here long, give it a week, give it a week. Stefan was sleepless nights, watching his mother sat upright almost all night, eyes on the door, a knife under her pillow. Stefan was you don’t need friends, they’ll drag you down.

Mary didn’t know until the end that they’d been friends, Neil teaching Andrew the little boxing he knew, Andrew teaching Stefan how to keep yourself busy when you needed something to do. There was something about Andrew that made it impossible for him to stay away; he wasn’t a particularly happy kid, but the way he spoke, the way he cared about the fake life Neil had made up, the way he saw Stefan’s life as something he could never have.

“Have you ever thought about kissing a boy your age?” They’d been in Oakland for three weeks, and the two kids had made plans to meet every time Mary was occupied and Andrew was around. Neil didn’t really think to wonder why Andrew was always around. Didn’t he have a family who would miss him being gone all this time? Didn’t he have a home to go to?

“No,” Neil answered honestly. There wasn’t time for thoughts like that. Kisses weren’t signs of affection; kisses were lies, kisses were dangerous, kisses occupied a space in the mind that could be filled with run, run, run.

“Do you think it’s wrong?” Andrew had been swinging on the swing set, his feet dangling from the chipped plastic seat, the creaky chains holding him up. The question was loaded. Behind it was a conversation he’d had with his foster-mom, a slur from his foster-siblings, another hit from his foster-father.

“No,” that was an honest answer too. In his head his answer sounded like I’ve been told all kissing was wrong. But he couldn’t say that. Normal teenagers thought about kissing, and boyfriends, and girlfriends, and worried about how they looked in front of their crush. “Do you?”

“I don’t know.” His words were a sigh. Andrew trusted Stefan in this weird, out of character way. He’d never met anyone who’d been more interested to hear about his life than talk about their own. Of course, half of it was a half-truth, lies weaved into the story of Andrew.

Andrew was the first person who made Neil smile in a very long time. It was foreign hearing himself laugh, a sound reserved for fake interactions with strangers who couldn’t help but prying. Neil trusted him. His honest eyes often burning a hole in his face, on the days when Neil couldn’t bare eye contact. Andrew was a rock that Neil could feel himself becoming more and more attached to, more and more…attracted to? He didn’t know what that feeling felt like, but when he caught himself thinking about what a long hug from him would feel like, or a kiss on the forehead, the cheeks, the nose, the….

It was an impossible thought that Neil kept buried. Until Andrew had a bad day. Until Neil met him in the playground and he was sat underneath the slide, face buried in his knees that were pulled to his chest. Black hood pulled so far forward it almost covered the wet cheeks and puffy eyes he tried to hide. Stefan sat just across from him, the tips of their shoes not quite touching, but Neil rested his open palms on his shoes for Andrew to hold if he needed. He didn’t ask what was wrong.

“You’re my friend?” Andrew asked, half statement, half question. There was no hesitation in Neil’s “Of course.”

Andrew gently weeped, babbling on about wishing he could feel normal, or have a normal family. He wished he could understand himself. He wished he didn’t have to hurt so much. He’d looked up at Neil with his red eyes and wiped the tears from his face with the cuff of his sleeve. “Can I trust you?”

The statement hurt Neil far more than he thought it would. He hated that words spilled out of his mouth, his eyes stinging at the thought of saying what he really wanted to say. His mouth said “You can tell me anything,” when his brain said “I think Stefan dies in a week”.

Andrew told him about how he thought he was gay, and how embarrassed, alone, and ugly he felt to think that way. He didn’t know what normal feelings felt like. He didn’t know what it felt like to kiss someone he actually wanted to kiss. The statement hung in the air like a floating question. Did he…? Andrew had brushed away the thought almost as quickly as Neil did, but not without both their cheeks flushing pink at the unspoken idea. Neil watched as Andrew messed with the strings on his hoodie. Andrew cheered up after a little while, but when Neil realised how long he’d been gone for, he panicked. Instinctively, he pulled Andrew into a hug before running back to the motel room.

Stefan was bad memories, he’d always had to remind himself. Stefan was a mistake, a fuck-up, a vulnerability he would never, ever show again. Stefan was a slap across the face when he came back late. “Where the hell have you been?” Followed by a lie, then another, then another. Neil had only lied to his mother a handful of times in his life, but when it came to Andrew they seemed to slip out of his mouth at an alarming rate. The next time he seen Andrew, his swollen, burst lip barely hidden, Andrew had brushed his fingers across it and sarcastically asked if it was the product of another boxing match. Neil shushed him when he asked if his mother had done it. That was too personal. He was letting Andrew in too far and he was rotting Neil from the inside out. His hardened exterior fell away when he was around Andrew, and boy, was that dangerous. It shattered into a million pieces when they sat at at the top of the jungle-gym and Andrew asked so gently if he could kiss him.

No, no, no. The ghost of his mother’s hands in his hair told him to walk away. The phantom pain of a slap, and a hit, and a deafening lecture about his safety told him to stop letting Andrew in. He knew it was dangerous. He knew it, he knew it, he knew it. So why did his lips automatically curl around the word yes and his heart start pumping a hundred miles a minute? They looked each other in the eyes for a few seconds, minutes, hours, days, until they were both so close they couldn’t see each other anymore. It was only a peck, a playground kiss, but Neil’s stomach flipped. Andrew pulled away as quickly as he’d leaned in. He didn’t look at Neil for the rest of the hour they spent together, but Neil didn’t look at him. That wasn’t to say they each didn’t have to constantly fight a love-struck smile off their faces every few minutes.

Their meetings started to get less frequent after that. Andrew stopped showing up, but instead left little notes carved into the yellow plastic of the slide. ‘R u grossed out? -A’ was the first one he left after their moment’s kiss. All Neil wrote back was ‘Never’. The next time they seen each other in person they sat hidden again in the top of the jungle gym. Neil knew Mary was planning on them moving on in the following days. He couldn’t tell Andrew. Even the thought of it broke his heart. Regardless of the kiss, or kisses, they shared, Andrew had become the closest friend Neil had ever had. Neil had to remind himself more than once that everything Andrew thought he knew about Stefan was a fabrication. They spoke about sexuality again, hands brushing off each other, sometimes intertwined, sometimes resting on the others leg or arm. Andrew asked if Neil was gay, and his face fell when Neil said no, I don’t think so. It took him a moment to add on “I don’t know what I am”. They left kisses on each other’s lips that lingered for hours, for days. The more Neil let Andrew in, the harder it was for him to keep lying to his mother. She began to get suspicious of where he was going when she left him alone.

Even still, Neil didn’t hear when Mary came into the playground the last time he seen Andrew. Andrew had his head rested on his shoulder, their hands intertwined and hidden between their outstretched legs. They’d been talking about something and nothing at the same time. Neil’s stomached bottomed out when he saw her brunette hair and tiny figure step around the rusted green fence. He let go of Andrew’s hand as quickly and as subtly as he could, but he knew it was no use. He didn’t know how long she’d been standing there. Andrew looked into Stefan’s green eyes as Neil stood up, searching, scared. Neil sent him a weak smile. This was the last time he would ever look into those hazel eyes, his light eyebrows furrowed as he watched Neil begin to walk away. Neil had nodded his way, and whispered a frightened ‘See you around’ before he walked over to join Mary. She grabbed his arm and pulled him towards their motel room, already mentally packing their bags. Not before she beat him harder than she ever had before. Neil expected it. But every blow reminded him of Andrew until Andrew was no longer gentle touches and honesty and kisses. Andrew was a kick to the back of the knees as he walked through the motel room door. Andrew was a slap, and another, and another. He was a screaming, crying, angry mother, shoving whatever belongings they owned into their single duffel bag. Andrew was leaving their key at reception at midnight and starting their journey to another town. Andrew wasn’t worth it. Andrew was the swollen ankle he walked on for miles. Andrew was Mary pulling roughly at his blonde hair to dye it black in some random gas station that night. He wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth it. Neil left Stefan with Andrew in Oakland. He tried to leave the memories there too. Oh, how badly he tried.

The worst part was, Andrew didn’t know that was the last time he would ever see Stefan again. He waited every day for him to come back. Every day came and went and every day he never showed up. Neil didn’t know about that part, you see. Neil thought Andrew would forget about Stefan like a childhood crush, thrown away, moved on to the next cute boy who listened to him talk. They shared a thought, though, drilling the regret and shame into their minds. He wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth it.

(Part 2)

#forgive me if my geography is shit #u might be able to tell I’m Not American #but damn I’m sad now #love those boys #andreil #andreil au #Andrew minyard #Neil josten #tfc #aftg #txt #rambles #also sorry if the names are confusing as hell #Stefan v Neil death match #tfc fic #aftg fic

84 notes · View notes

buriedinbaltimore · 4 years

Text

Imagine the foxes playing two truths and a lie...

The upperclassmen start playing it as a drinking game one night and Neil is intrigued. Andrew is also intrigued but doesn’t show it and refuses to play.

They are all already pretty tipsy, with Kevin, Matt, Nicky, and Aaron pretty much drunk.

Allison goes first, she has an amazing poker face and calmly says all three statements with no facial twitches or vocal cues. “my first car was a Toyota Camry (truth), my prom dress cost over $10k (lie), and I once made out with Miley Cyrus (truth)”

Renee, Neil, and Aaron guess right, Matt, Dan, Kevin, and Nicky have to drink.

Then it’s Matt’s turn and he is terrible, he starts snickering before he opens his mouth. “I’ve swam with sharks (truth)” he says, but he cannot control his face and it keeps contorting as he tries to maintain a neutral expression. He takes a deep breath to try and control his giggles, “my favorite flower is sunflowers (truth)” then he can’t hold it in anymore and starts hysterically laughing and chokes out, “My favorite city in the world is Newark, NJ (lie)”

Everyone gets it right and Matt has to drink.

Dan is next, she goes for the “one of these is so out there and crazy it can’t be a lie...or is it?” method.

((It is.))

“I’ve never shot a gun (truth), as a kid my favorite food was celery with ranch dressing (truth), and when I was 18 I won the lottery but the ticket was ruined and I couldn’t claim the money (lie)”

Aaron jumps in with “Obviously you never won the lottery, how would you even know if the ticket was destroyed”

Dan has her story ready. “When I first turned 18, I played the same numbers every week. It went on for a few months when my numbers were picked, but by that point playing was more of a habit than anything else and I wasn’t too careful with my tickets. I searched for it everywhere and found that I left it in my jeans pocket when I did my laundry.”

Allison asks what the numbers were, and Dan answers with no hesitation, which makes Allison tilt her head and stare into Dan’s eyes. Dan looks back without guile, totally relaxed.

Nicky is looking at her with his eyes wide and mouth slightly open and asks how much money she would have won

When Dan answers $53 million dollars Nicky gasps and Matt groans.

Neil, Renee, and Allison get it right, but everyone else falls for it.

When its Nicky turn he forgets to say a lie.

He is sitting there trying to come up with something for what feels like forever while every goads him for taking so long.

Finally, after waiting 5 minutes, Kevin says “I’m going because Nicky obviously can’t come up with anything” and Nicky jumps across Kevins lap and goes “No no no no no, I’ve got it!”

Without moving off Kevin he says “I’m allergic to shellfish, I died my hair green once, and I’ve read all the twilight books three times“ He moves back to his spot looking pleased with himself.

Everyone starts discussing theories until Andrew says in his bored, flat voice, “Nicky, those are all true”

Nicky starts to protest, thinks for a second, then just says “Fuck!” and takes a shot.

Kevin rolls his eyes so hard that his entire head rotates then says, while slightly slurring, “Okay, my turn! I’ve played a game of pick up basketball once (lie), I know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire (truth), and I’ve traveled to over a dozen countries (truth).”

Matt starts hysterically laughing again, “You know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire! oh my god Kevin you are such a nerd!” everyone else starts laughing at Kevin too.

“Maybe I do, maybe it’s the lie!”

“Everyone knows you’ve never played a sport besides Exy in your life Kevin” Dan says, “Will you sing it for us? Please, please, please!”

Allison, Nicky, and Matt join Dan in asking Kevin to sing. Renee even says, “It would be lovely to hear you sing it Kevin” to which Kevin blushes a little and answers, “Maybe later” and then takes his shot.

Aaron is drunk enough at this point to spill some truths he otherwise never would, and will wish for the rest of his life that he never had.

“When I was little, I wanted to be a figure skater when I grew up.(truth)”

Everyone goes completely silent and stares at him unsure whether to laugh or not but he doesn’t realize and continues

“The first time I got high I thought the squirrels in the tree wanted to adopt me as their squirrel king (truth), and I hate Taylor Swift (lie)”

No one says anything at first, and just when Aaron starts to realize something is up, Nicky says “Nah man, you LOVE T. Swift, you can’t deny it!”

They collectively make a silent agreement to ignore this new information about Aaron until he sobers up a bit and can either defend himself, or will be more fun to tease.

In the end, everyone but Renee guesses right, but she guessed wrong on purpose because she didn’t think that Aaron should be having any more to drink.

When it’s Renee’s turn, she smiles sweetly and says, ”I can juggle up to 7 balls (truth), I have never drank diet soda (lie), and I once had a pet turtle named Vincent (truth).”

No one is confident about which is the lie and it is the longest the foxes debate after anyones turn. It doesn’t help that Renee refuses to answer questions, and whenever someone tries to ask her anything she just smiles and shrugs.

It comes out to Neil and Aaron getting it right, while everyone else has to drink.

“How the fuck has it never come up that you’re a master juggler?” Allison asks angrily

“It wouldn’t be appropriate to do it at practice, and we’re not really around balls much otherwise.”

Everyone asks for a demonstration, “I will juggle later if Kevin will sing.”

Everyone looks at Kevin who sighs but says “Okay, fine!”

They all cheer then wait eagerly for Neil to go.

Neil sits quietly for a little while, not as long as Nicky, but long enough that Aaron says, “Come on this should be easy for you! You lied to us all for a year, what’s the problem, the truth?”

Neil shoots him a dirty look but doesn’t respond for a few more seconds then says,

“My mom and I once helped deliver a baby at a truck stop in Alberta, I’ve been bitten by a camel, and I can speak 7 languages”

Everyone just stares at him.

“Two of those things are true?” Matt finally asks

“Yeah.” Neil says, shrugging. Everyone is silent again.

Nicky turns to Andrew for help, but he refuses to say anything. His eyes are bright with interest though and he looks at Neil for a long time. Internally, he thinks the one about helping birth a baby has something off about it.

After much debate, Allison, Kevin, and Matt guess the baby, Renee, Dan, and Aaron guess the camel, and Nicky says the languages, “No one can know SEVEN languages!! I won’t believe it!”

They all turn to Neil expectantly and he says, “It was the first one, we were just outside Vancouver, in British Columbia, not Alberta.”

“But you, Neil Josten, have helped deliver a baby?” Allison asks incredulously.

“Technically I wasn’t Neil Josten yet…”

Everyone groans. Everyone takes a shot.

Cut to 15 minutes later, Renee is juggling an exy ball, some apples, and Matt’s phone while Kevin sings. Nicky tries to sing along with Kevin but definitely doesn’t know the right words, Aaron is watching Renee wide eyed, Dan and Matt are playing air guitar behind Kevin, and Allison is looking for more things for Renee to juggle. Neil and Andrew sit quietly on a desk holding cigarettes, observing their idiot friends.

Stories Behind the Truths and Lies

Allison

My first car was a Toyota Camry (truth) - Allison’s parents wanted her to learn how to drive in a safe car that wouldn’t draw a lot of attention, so they got her a Camry. She only drove it for 3 weeks before demanding an upgrade.

My prom dress cost over $10k (lie) - This was almost true. She had ordered a custom Zac Posen dress but before it was finalized she made her decision to go to PSU and play Exy, and her mother canceled the order. She ended up wearing something she found in a vintage store that she altered herself. She ended up enjoying it a lot, which led to her decision to study fashion. (In my hc she played professional Exy for 3? seasons but was injured and then started her fashion line.)

I once made out with Miley Cyrus (truth) - While out clubbing one night she met Miley through mutual friends, they were attracted to each other, they made out. Miley asked for her number but Allison wasn’t looking for anything more than a hook up.

Matt

I’ve swam with sharks (truth) - He did this with his mom on a vacation and they both loved it. They also have a tradition where they watch at least one night of shark week together, or at least call each other to talk while they are both watching.

My favorite flower is sunflowers (truth) - No story lol I just think he would like sunflowers.

My favorite city in the world is Newark, NJ (lie) - I love thinking about New Yorker Matt. Raised on the Upper East Side, dad a top plastic surgeon, mom a public figure? Child grew up surrounded by serious privilege. HC that in fifth grade he made friends with a boy who was on scholarship at his school. Let’s call him… Metin. He lived in Queens? He took the subway? Matt goes to his house one day and it is 1/8th the size of his apartment and there are 9 people living there; Metin’s parents, two grandparents, his uncle, his two sisters, and his cousin. They all speak Turkish in the house and it’s loud and crowded but so full of life and love and Matt loves it. He and Metin grew apart when Matt started using, but before that they were best friends for years and explored the city together, Matt learning about and experiencing so much culture that for the first 9 years of his life he didn’t know existed. When Nicky wanted to go to Times Square for New Years Matt knew he had to be a good host and take them but inside he was DYING. I’m getting off track. No New Yorker could ever like Newark. I’m not convinced anybody could like Newark. It is indeed, very laughable.

Dan

I’ve never shot a gun (truth) - Dan hates guns and refuses to shoot one.

As a kid my favorite food was celery with ranch dressing (truth) - Idk I just thought this was cute. And also thinking about young Dan who didn’t have a lot of access to healthy foods getting celery sticks and ranch with her free school lunch and getting SO excited. Trading her cookie to a classmate for their celery.

When I was 18 I won the lottery but the ticket was ruined and I couldn’t claim the money (lie) - I like to think this is part true. After Dan turned 18 but before she was recruited for the Foxes, she played lotto a lot, always with the same numbers that she got from a fortune cookie that said, “Failure is not defeat until you stop trying.” She stopped playing once she signed with Wymack.

Nicky (all truths)

I’m allergic to shellfish - Mostly I love that Andrew knew all these things about Nicky, especially his allergy because he’s always looking out to make sure Nicky doesn’t eat something he can’t.

I died my hair green once - At first, when he took custody of the twins and started showing up for them at school at stuff, he hated the looks he got. He was a 19 year old kid who was supposed to be their guardian? Not to mention the way people eyed his skin and hair when he said he was family. One day he decided to dye his hair blond and he asked Andrew and Aaron to help, to try to bond. Aaron wanted nothing to do with it, but surprisingly, Andrew seem enthusiastic about the idea. He bought the dye and did everything for Nicky in the kitchen. When he was finally done roughly washing the dye out of Nicky’s hair, Nicky went to the bathroom to see how he looked and saw that Andrew had died his hair green. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh at the prank or cry because he foolishly thought he might be getting through to Andrew. When he went back to the kitchen, he tried to laugh it off and said maybe he should go to a salon to get the color right. Andrew told him he was stupid to try and change how he looked just because people were dumb enough to think that families needed to look alike. Besides, they weren’t a family anyway. “Family” is a toxic excuse for things people put up with, a reason we accept the tragedies and inconveniences forced upon us. (Nora’s words) Nicky was upset, and dyed his hair back to his natural color once the roots started growing in, but he reaffirmed his commitment in that moment that he would show the twins what Erik had shown him, what a family could really be.

I’ve read all the twilight books three times - Nicky was a huge fan of twilight, even going to the midnight release party for the last book. He was disappointed in the movie adaptations but loved the casting and watched for the eye candy. He is loving the twilight renaissance especially the twilight is gay discourse.

Kevin

I’ve played a game of pick up basketball once (lie) - Kevin has never played a game of basketball, or soccer, or tennis, or baseball, or any other sport for that matter and can not understand why anyone would want to.

I know all the lyrics to We Didn’t Start the Fire (truth) - Kayleigh Day was a big music fan, she loved everything from classical to country, but one of her favorite artists was Billy Joel. After she died and Kevin moved into Evermore, he almost forgot about her music because the music at the Nest was all chosen for pragmatic reasons, like its BPM and ability to pump the players up. One day, when Kevin was around 15 years old, a rebellious Raven played his own music while training in the weight room. He and his partner were the only ones in there until Riko and Kevin showed up, and they turned it off as soon as they realized they had come in, but Kevin heard some of “Only the Good Die Young” and for the first time in a long time had a vivid memory of his mother. He asked the boys what had been playing, and Riko scoffed at the name Billy Joel. That night while Riko was sleeping, Kevin downloaded Billy Joel’s Greatest Hits and listened until he feel asleep, and he continued listening to it for weeks until he started remembering more of his mothers songs from his childhood. We Didn’t Start the Fire was one of his favorites because history.

I’ve traveled to over a dozen countries (truth) - Between travel through Europe with his mom while she spread Exy and professional appearances he made with Riko, Kevin is the most well traveled besides Neil.

Aaron

When I was little, I wanted to be a figure skater when I grew up. (truth) - When Aaron was around four or five, he watched the winter olympics on TV and fell in love with figure skating. Tilda never bothered to get him skating lessons, but one day, when Aaron was seven, there was an attempt to revive the Ice Capades. Aaron never thought he would get to go, but Tilda surprised him with tickets. It is one of the few really good memories he has of his mom.

The first time I got high I thought the squirrels in the tree wanted to adopt me as their squirrel king (truth) - I just imagine Aaron trying his mom’s drugs for the first time alone in the back yard, laying flat on his back looking up at a family of squirrels, saying, “I’m king of the squirrels!!!”

I hate Taylor Swift (lie) - Katelyn is a HUGE Taylor Swift fan. When they first started hanging out, Aaron didn’t really like her music but didn’t want to say anything. Eventually he started associating her with Katelyn though, and he loves watching Katelyn sign and dance so much that he now genuinely enjoys her music.

Renee

I can juggle up to 7 balls (truth) - Renee always had a natural juggling talent. She never really tried to learn, it was just always something she could do.

I have never drank diet soda (lie) - She does prefer non-diet soda, but she has tried diet before.

I once had a pet turtle named Vincent (truth) - Vincent was a gift from one of her mother’s boyfriends, the only one Renee ever remotely like. He was horrible to her mother, but had a soft spot for Renee and treated her kindly. They broke up after a couple of months, and he gave her Vincent as a parting gift. She had him until she got arrested, she couldn’t go back home to get him and when her mother went to prison he died.

Neil

My mom and I once helped deliver a baby at a truck stop in Alberta (lie) - This happened while Neil and his mom were on the way to Seattle. It was the middle of the night and they stopped to get gas a few hours out from Vancouver when they heard a woman screaming. There was nothing around for miles and only one other car in the lot that had been there when they pulled in. His mother immediately dropped the gas pump and Neil was already back in the car when the screaming stopped and his mother hesitated. Neil had never seen his mom hesitate with a potential threat around before, and he listened closely to try and understand why she stopped. All he heard was a woman panting harshly, but it sounded almost as though there was a rhythm to it. Mary signaled for him to get out of the car, and ordered him to grab some blankets, the first aid kit, and water bottles and follow her. They walked behind the locked public bathrooms, and found the woman squatting, with tears running down her face. Mary wasn’t very gentle or comforting, but she told the woman in a calm and confident voice that they were going to help. Neil didn’t do much, but he let the woman hold his hand and squeeze until he thought she would break it. He gave her sips of water between her contractions and did anything else his mother said. Once the baby was out, wrapped in a blanket, and in its mothers arms, Mary grabbed Neil and they left without another word to the woman. She stared after them, confused and grateful. Neil and his mother never spoke of it again.

I’ve been bitten by a camel (truth) - Neil and Mary spent a few days in Dubai to get some papers from a specialist there before traveling back to North America. The man did his business out of a racetrack where they held camel races. To get to his office, they had to travel through the back part of the track that the jockeys used to get the camels into position. Neil got too close to one of the camels and it bit his arm, luckily (or not), the jockey was in the middle of beating it and before it closed its mouth too tightly, landed a blow that caused the camel to immediately open its mouth again. Once he was freed, Neil was out of reach in a millisecond.

I can speak 7 languages (truth) - English, German, French, Russian, Hebrew, Czech, Greek. (To clarify he can speak 7 languages but he wouldn’t necessarily call himself fluent in all 7) We all know English, German, French, and Nora had a hc that Andrew and Neil learn Russian so they can talk to each other even with the cousins around which I love. Hebrew - In my hc Neil is jewish, as are Mary and Nathan. After running away, Mary didn’t know where to go once she had left her brother. She didn’t speak any other languages besides English, but she could understand Yiddish from hearing her grandparents and sometimes her parents speaking it growing up, and she could understand Polish from her time married to Nathan. She didn’t want to go to Poland in case any of Nathan’s contacts recognized her, so she decided to go to Israel. She knew there were communities there that spoke Yiddish and she was familiar if not comfortable with Hebrew from going to temple when she was younger. But most importantly she knew Nathan didn’t have any regular contacts there. While they were there, along with learning Hebrew, Mary pretended to be interested in converting to Greek Orthodox in order to get secret Greek lessons for her and Neil. After a while but sooner than she had hoped, Mary got a warning that Nathan had figured out where they were. She didn’t think it would be wise to go directly to Greece so she decided to move them to Prague next, since Czech and Polish are fairly similar and she really had no other ideas. While in Prague she continued her and Neil’s Greek lessons, and they went on to Greece eventually. Mary didn’t want them to lose any of the languages they learned, so she came up with a system that on certain days of the week they would speak to each other in certain languages. After Mary died, Neil pretty much gave up on Czech and Hebrew because he hadn’t been surrounded by them in so long and he hadn’t used either except with Mary since they moved from Prague or Israel. They had lived in Greece for longer than they had in Prague or Israel though, moving to a few different cities, so he felt stronger with Greek.

Fin.

This is my first time writing anything fanfiction, my first time doing any creative writing at all really, and I would love any and all feedback!! Thanks for reading this long ass post, I hope it wasn’t terrible!!

1K notes · View notes

alpacaparkaseok · 3 years

Text

30 Questions Tag Game

Tagged by @moon-write whom I love

name/nickname: B, Bren, Bdawg, Mi Reina (or at least that’s what my phone calls me lol)

star sign: virgo

height: 5′6 (also @moon-write I snorted at your “on a good day” comment here lol)

birthday: september

favorite band: bts (I mean, I would hope so if I’m running this blog lol), Sleeping at Last (been in love with them for so long, pls go listen to them they’re so underrated), Little Mix, TXT, AJR, Lady A, Stray Kids, Shinee, Blackpink, Itzy, MAMAMOO STAN QUEENS YA’LL, Monsta X, Lany, and lots more

time: 8:01 pm

favorite solo artist: HAHA ok, IU, Taylor Swift, CAMILO I LOVE THAT MAN, NF, Quinn XCII, Jon McLaughlin, RM, Agust D, Baekyun, Ben Platt, Ed Sheeran, Leslie Odom Jr., MAX, Neil Diamond, Nat King Cole, j-hope, Evaluna, Beyoncé, Jeremy Zucker, Chelsea Cutler, Kelsea Ballerini, and so many others that I can’t even think straight

song stuck in your head: mad at me by Quinn XCII

last movie you watched: Dan in Real Life

free space!: I’M SO EXCITED FOR THIS NEXT CHAPTER OF HTSS I CAN’T CONTAIN IT AND I LOVE YOU GUYS AND LITERALLY CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW MUCH I LOVE HEARING FROM YOU SO THANK YOU FOR REACHING OUT EVEN IF IT’S JUST TO SCREAM

last show: the bachelorette (I’M DEVASTATED OVER ANDREW S. DON’T TALK TO ME)

when i created this blog: October 2020! I still mentally visit that first month in my head all the time, I loved getting on here and not knowing literally anything lol. can’t believe how much has happened since then!!

what i post: bts fanfics for daysssss and lot’s of things shoving my love for you down your throat and begging for attention lol

last thing i googled: "flowering cactus plants”

other blogs: @seokjinsbookclub is my fic rec blog!

do i get asks?: ohh I do and I love them haha. you guys are so sweet and hilarious and never fail to make me smile! also I appreciate when you’re vulnerable with me!

why i chose my url?: simple. have you ever heard Kim Seokjin try to pronounce “alpaca parka”?? adorable and hilarious. also added the “seok” at the end as homage to both Seokjin and Hoseok, who is my bias wrecker! (and Namjoon just pouts in the corner and ignores me when I tell him that I literally wrote my first fanfic about him lolll)

following: 70+ I think. I need to follow more but I always forget

followers: ok idk how this keeps happening but ya’ll have starting following me so fast and it’s wild, and I’m about to hit 1000 and I didn’t think that’d happen so quickly, so the thought of hitting 1k before my year mark is baffling and humbling and I just wanna say thank you guys. I love you.

average hours of sleep: usually 6-8 but last week was about 4 woooo

lucky number: 22!!

what am i wearing?: workout joggers and a pale pink top! so comfy haha

dream job: writing!! I’m so happy that I get to do it as much as I do, it’s the best thing ever and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

favorite food: ok there’s this Pacific Islander restaurant where I live and they have a sweet pork rice bowl with steamed veggies and a jalapeño ranch dressing and IT’S STRAIGHT FROM THE HEAVENS I KID YOU NOT AND NOW I HAVE CRAVINGS. also tuna casserole. I love tuna so much. oh and peaches. I love peaches. and avocado toast.

tea or coffee: neither!

nationality: American

favorite song: *nervous chuckling* this is horrible to have to pick just one. how about top 3?? I’d say “Inner Child” by our lovely Tae, “Eight″ by Sleeping at Last (very near and dear to me since that’s my enneagram number, and for some reason this song is so special to me because it immediately takes me to a peaceful spot, but “The Lake” by Galantis and Wrabel. also outro: tear, Let Go, Awake, Follow You by Jon Mclaughlin, and dis-ease and so many more

last book i read: “The Silent Patient” by Alex Michaelides (strongly recommend!!) and currently finishing up “We Were the Lucky Ones” by Georgia Hunter

top three fictional universes i would like to live in: HP BBY, Throne of Glass!! and Goblin (the k-drama) as long as I get to either date the reaper or the goblin lol

this was fun! tagging @dreamcatcherjiah @ahundredtimesover @delacyrose224 @sierra-fics and @minsyubradio and whoever else wants to do this!

#about me #tag game #all about b

8 notes · View notes

i-did · 3 years

Note

Idk if anyone has asked this previously, sorry if they have!! I was wondering what some of your favourite andreil fics where? Particularly au fics, cause u saying that u sometimes ponder andreil having met when they were in their 60s made me think maybe andreil aus are ur thing? Hopefully that makes sense lol, also rlly curious how u think andreil meeting in their 60s may affect their dynamic/relationship potentially?

Okay so I actually have a bookmarks list, but I'm hoping to go back and read them and see if I still like them now lol, since my taste has changed a lot over the years and since I started to critically think about fandom culture. I bookmark a lot of stuff even if it contains trends I criticize in fandom culture since… those trends are largely unavoidable. But anyways here's my bookmarks list, its pretty mixed:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawberryproblems/bookmarks

I guess Au’s are my thing maybe, I've never really thought about it. I have a detailed list of all the different AFTG fanfic ideas I have, some detailed backstories and HC’s of various foxes, some au’s. I have 13 HC fic ideas rn in that file that are canon compliant, either before or after canon, and about 20 on the AU list, but a lot of those are a more vague “this movie/book au” while some have a lot of detailed notes and ideas. I have no idea how many of these ill actually ever write or publish tbh, I like to think about them mostly for myself and sometimes posting my art or writing can discourage me due to lack of traction/popularity. I struggle with comparing myself to others tbh which is why I stopped posting so much art.

As for Andrew and Neil meeting in their 60’s, there is just so many different ways it could go. I once thought of an AU where they meet once when they're in their early 20’s for a period of time, and then meet again by chance in their 60’s and have a moment of “oh I remember you.” It really depends on a lot of factors and how they would have gotten to that point in the first place.

30 is half of 60, but I'm casually writing a fic where Andrew and Neil meet in their early 30s as neighbors in an apartment complex and due to a rent increase and the pandemic have to move in as roomates. I’m writing it with a friend and not taking it very seriously atm and I don't know when/if ill be posting it, since it’s mostly for me and him to enjoy right now, and I'm trying to focus on foxholes. It was just supposed to be a “bored roomates stuck in quarantine end up with a FWB situation AU”–but since it’s Andrew and Neil, I ended up planning out the last 10 years of their lives and what happened and how they're different from their canon selves and why they would be where they are and how would they get close enough to even get to that point.

They're both very different and similar to the people they are in canon, they never really developed in the ways they do in canon, but they're stuck in a new way than before. Andrew’s deal with Aaron has expired and Andrew’s let himself get forgotten, refusing to reach back out and keep contact with anyone. The team lost it’s class I status. Neil never graduated from high school and when his mother died the car exploded while he was burning it, and he got badly injured. I had fun constructing a bunch of details in the background and random technical details that aren’t needed for the basic premise of the fic, but I personally prefer to think about.

If you want an ‘Andrew and Neil meet when they're older au’ there’s this one:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17573861

It’s not how I personally think stuff would go down, but it’s still a good read. It’s also on my bookmarked list so clearly I liked it enough to give myself the option of going back and rereading it again later.

But anyways, I essentially need a stronger framework to even begin to think about how Andrew and Neil would act if they met in their 60’s, there are just so many options. Probably didn’t give the response you were expecting, but who knows maybe one day I’ll make a bullet fic or two.

#ask #mailob

9 notes · View notes

crazy-fangirl2524 · 4 years

Text

What if Andrew died?

Hi yes it’s me again I’m writing another headcanon because why the fuck not and idk if yall have read it but Nora did mention that if Andrew was somehow killed by Ichirou as a warning or message Neil would basically destroy the Moriyamas and he would be more Wesninski than Josten and Nora ended with five years later Matt and dan found him and stuff and Imma continue from there on because I’m a fucking masochist

while Nathaniel is not sorry for the path he took and the sacrifices he made for revenge, he finally grieves for everything he’s lost (this is taken straight form nora’s tumblr (which doesn’t exist anymore but anyways))

Matt and dan tell Neil Nathaniel what had happened for the last few years and Nathaniel listens expressionlessly (it’s worse than Andrew’s blank look because his eyes are just dead dead)

When they mention about Andrew’s urn which is still in Aaron’s possession Nathaniel’s eyes flash and they finally see a glimpse of the boy they knew just a much more broken and sad version

Nathaniel tells them nothing about him but they know he is listening so they just fill the silence with their life and the foxes life for the past few years (lets just assume that they are in a coffee shop in japan)

One year after their visit, Renee visits Nathaniel with Andrew’s urn, and Renee gives it to Nathaniel saying that he deserves to be the one to keep it

Nathaniel doesn’t know how to react, he literally just froze, it’s the only thing that has ever caught him off guard since Matt and Dan’ visit and Renee basically shoves the urn into his arms

Renee waits patiently for Nathaniel to recover and Nathaniel finally asks, “why did they keep it, after all this time, Aaron?” he asks so quietly it is a miracle that Renee heard him but she did

The question is a jumbled mess but Renee gets it and she says, “we thought that maybe someday you might want it, and Aaron doesn’t mind”

Nathaniel nods and Renee asks if it is okay if any of the foxes want to visit him and Nathaniel just shrugs

After Renee leaves, Nathaniel back in his apartment just stares at the urn. He doesn’t cry or say anything he just stares at it for maybe like hours or even days.

The urn brings back a lot of memories, no matter how hard Nathaniel tries, he can never forget the feeling of Andrew’s hands on him, hot and heavy, his mouth hard on his, Andrew taking him apart steadily and Andrew’s neck fetish. The trust, the keys which he still keeps in one of the bottom drawers, he can’t bring it in himself to throw them away, the honestly and the truths Andrew gave him

He put it on the nightstand besides his bed and he finally also brings the keys out and put it besides the urn

The next time, all the foxes somehow even Aaron and Kevin and Wymark and Abby and Besty go to visit Nathaniel and they all catch up. Even though Nathaniel still tells them nothing about himself and doesn’t contribute to any of the conversations, they can see his relaxed shoulders and his eyes are not that dead, although still blank. And they never once call him Nathaniel, only Neil.

He will always be Neil to them

These visit to Japan become a regular thing although it is not all the foxes all together

One visit, Dan gives Nathaniel the picture she took years ago of Andrew and Neil, where Neil gave Andrew his real name in the airport.

It is the only picture of Neil and Andrew there ever is

Nathaniel thanks her and dan gives him a sad smile

Nathaniel frames it and put it besides the urn and the keys

Many years past and during one visit, when Dan and Matt visit Nathaniel again, they found out he is dead (i do not know how just maybe alcohol poisoning? Car accident?) (also maybe Nathaniel is in his late thirties)

The foxes decide to put neil’s ash in Andrew’s urn

“Fucking junkie,” he pulls him close and rest his head on his shoulder. “I missed you” “I hate you”

I hope you guys enjoy this!!!! As much as I did while writing it!!!! Idek why I keep on thinking about these stuff honestly ahahaha I’m not crying your crying what why are my eyes sweating lol

The last bulletpoint is their reunion in the afterlife because I refuse to believe that they aren’t soulmates and of course they will still be together in the afterlife and all lives afterwards till the end of the fucking time

214 notes · View notes

luci-cunt · 4 years

Note

This may be madness, but: Aaron & Neil (not Aaron/Neil unless you super want to); 24 & 63

Hello darling, this is INTRIGUING and I’m HERE for it!!! <3333 (it didn’t end up being shippy tho lol)

24. Soulmate AU + 63. Everybody Knows/Mistaken for Couple

K so, the setting is an office-type au-ish-thing--

Neil works as the company’s accountant, he’s fidgety, and pissy, and weird, and Aaron can’t fucking stand him

Aaron works in regular old sales, he’s surprisingly good at his job but he likes purposefully spilling coffee all over his record sheets so that Neil has to get the copies online instead of physically like he likes better and Neil HATES him

They both have a kind of rivalry, with Neil trying every fucking step to audit Aaron and catch him in something--

One time he watched Aaron smack the vending machine and nab a chip bag without paying and he legitimately tried to get Aaron fired over it

(it didn’t work, but it did mean war)

Another detail you should know: everyone in the office KNEW they were soulmates

The thing about soulmates in this universe is that you both get matching marks, but, if one person messes with the mark (i.e covers it up/ adds to it) those changes also appear on your soulmates arm

Cathy from HR saw it first--Neil usually only wears the company policy dress shirts (never ironed) but one day Aaron “accidentally” spilled chai on him and he had to change, exposing his right shoulder where there was the distinct black-and-white outline of a snake eating it’s own tail. There was also a key in the middle of the circle.

Don from finance saw Aaron’s later--the same design on the same shoulder

The whole office was in a tizzy over it, Neil and Aaron were none-the-wiser as their feud came to a head when Neil audited Aaron for the fourth time that week and Aaron threw the printer out the window so Neil couldn’t get physical copies of anything until they got a replacement one

However--the straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back was when Aurelia saw Aaron and Neil kissing in his office

She immediately ran to some of the others, spilling the news

“You’re sure it was Aaron?” Ken said--he was the only one still skeptical about the apparent office romance.

“I’m sure!! Though.... he was wearing a leather jacket for some reason...”

“A leather jacket?”

“Hey--Don,” Aaron interrupts them suddenly, making all of them jump and curse. He gives them all a weird look. “I was just wondering how those reports were coming along....”

“Right--yeah--uh I’ll go grab them--” and Don scurries away

“Where’s your jacket?” Aurelia asks, because she can’t help herself.

“Neil dumped kim chi all over it, I threw it away”

“Really? I’m sorry, it looked expensive”

“It was a blazer, I’ll get a new one at target” and then he walks away

They all share looks--“blazer--????”

But then they have to get back to work and the chatter dies off for the day

The mystery of the jacket is only solved when they discover Neil is cheating on Aaron--not only just cheating, but cheating with his twin brother!!

“We have to tell him” Don says somberly

“No! It’s not our business!” Cathy says frantically

“I think it’d be funny” Jessica says--she’s promptly banned from gossip circles

Eventually they decide one of them needs to speak up, so Don slides into Neil’s office one night, stomach rolling, and tells him “cheating isn’t cool man”

Neil blinks “uh--yeah?”

Don watches him, clears his throat, and watches him some more

“Can I get you something?” Neil asks, brow furrowing a bit

and then Don breaks and spills the whole situation. Neil’s eyebrows go into his hair line and he kicks Don out with a succinct “I would rather eat my own legs than go on a date with Aaron Minyard”

because Neil is an asshole--and so is Aaron for that matter--no one in the building ever finds out what the fuck is going on with that

(the secret is that Andrew and Aaron had to be completely identical when they were younger so they matched up their tattoos. If you look closely, the snake on Neil and Andrew’s shoulder is really fucking shitty cuz it was done by a 9 y/o with a stolen tattoo gun. Aaron and Katelyn’s keys are also shitty tattooed)

<3333 !!!!

Send me some prompts + some characters or a ship and I’ll tell ya how I’d mash em

#lol idk what this is XDD #aftg #all for the game #fic #luci writes

81 notes · View notes

thegreenerartist · 4 years

Text

Okay okay guys wait

Just I M A G I N E

The Foxhole Court,,, but set in the Philippines (they’ll all still be the same characters but it’ll just take place in the Philippines!)

The Filipino & Filipina Foxes!

Okay so Neil is still on the run, with 5 mil ($) in his pocket, but think about it. There are 7,641 islands. 7,641. His father would have absolute HELL trying to find him and his mother (until she died oop) (probably somewhere where they are trying to sneak into Luzon?) So then Nathan will be stationed, not in Baltimore, but maybe somewhere in Luzon (it being the central island and all)

Neil would know how to speak English (universal language duh), Tagalog (common Filipino language) and maybe Ilongo? Or Ilocano? For Luzon, but then he’ll probably know the common languages too, like Bisaya and Cebuano for Visayas, maybe he’ll know Arabic or Islamic for Mindanao? (I highlighted the ones I think he would most likely know, but most Filipino langauges tbh sound similar. Takes maybe a few months, weeks if you’re good, to learn a language like a native)

So idk how to segúé (how to even spell??) to him meeting the Foxes bUT HE GETS THERE

Soo let’s say the Cousins (yes thats their official tital no I don’t take critisism) know how to speak Arabic while Kevin is the one who speaks Bisaya. Everyone can speak English and Tagalog because Filipinos are taught English and Tagalog early on oop

Okay fine this will still be an Exy universe (but can yall imagine? Street basketball?)

They’ll probably be learning somewhere in Luzon, most likely NCR for plot because it’s probably where Nathan and his men are too

They meet and stuff, cool shenanigans

(Their backstories might be a tad rougher than in canon because,,, yeah. It happens here)

Okay so I just wanna get to the fun stuff, since that’s what I originally planned for this post

Nicky and Allison will deffo be like those ladies who wash clothes and gossip, i.e. spreading chismis

Nicky reminds me of the gays here that go “oH HEY MGA BES!”

Andrew is THAT dude who goes up to an ice cream guy and asks for, “Cornetto. The sweetest one you have”

He wouldnt like dirty ice cream. It’s too bland and milky, not sweet

Neil would fit right in. Everyone here wears shirts and pants/shorts. Some guys dont even bother putting a shirt on

Dan and Neil go bonding to the palengke (wet market) since most of the other foxes have been raised in middle class

Matt buys those birds in the cages so he can set them free like the good boy he is :)

Renee is a BOSS in chinese garter

Allison was the heir to,, idk probably something like SM or something

Aaron is every asian parents’ dream tbh

Also I love the idea of them getting houses since Filipino houses here look basic as heck but look SO authentic, as in yall could go, “wow that looks like a normal house” but then,,, yall would know. That’s a Filipino’s house right there

Everyone get’s THOSE houses where there are literal bars on the windows and the fence is so goddamn tall

Except for Kevin and Allison

Those two would get the classy stuff

Like Allison would probably be living in those houses that were during the Spanish Colonial Period (with Renee because duh)

Kevin will get a private resort or something somewhere in Boracay or Palawan or something (with no one because I fully support aro ace Kevin [ but bi Kevin is awesome too though don’t get me wrong {sorry Thea}])

I would love to propose the idea of Neil calling Andrew ‘mahal’ or ‘love’(THEY ARE MARRIED HERE LET ME LIVE) (ILL JUST SAY THEY GOT MARRIED IN THE US OKAY)

In the morning, when they wake up and Neil goes, “m’hal, pakibukas ung bintana” “love, can you open the blinds?”

(Fun fact, the prefix paki is a polite way of asking someone to do the action, the same way you say ‘may’, ‘can’ and ‘please’)

But then ‘mahal’ ALSO means ‘expensive’ in Tagalog. I find it funny because Andrew is truly, very, absolutely expensive

“My god napakamahal naman yan’ Drew’!”

“Oh my god Drew’, that’s so expensive!”

“mAy stAnDArdS akO excUSE Me!!11!”

“I have standards excuse me!”

“M A H A L ‘W A G”

“L O V E , N O”

I love the idea that they play basketball in their free time with neighbourhood kids, as in street basketball

It starts with Andrew and Neil

They were outside, holding hands (it’s ok Philippines isn’t SUPER homophobic) (and even if someone was stupid enough to talk them down, they have knives :)

And these,,, kids go up and be like, “laro?” “play?”

Because kids right?

And BOOM it becomes a thing (usually on their breaks :)

Renee joins because Peace Corps (actually no. She did it out of the kindness of her own heart)

Then Dan, Matt and Nicky wanted to join

Allison was dragged there by Renee

Katelyn wanted Aaron to come too

Kevin decided to go since it’s the off-season and he has nothing to do, yaba daba da he actually misses his foxes

He keeps mumbling, “buti pa kapag nilaro nila an Exy *grumble grumble*” “it would be better if the played Exy instead *grumble grumble*”

They are happy :D

Okay so yall know how Kevin is a health freak

So one day Andrew will eat one too many goSH DARN AICE AND KEVIN WILL HAVE A F I T

Andrew doesn’t care

Until he does

Kevin can go on and on about how unhealthy some foods are and blah blah blah

But yall cANNOT TELL ME that that boy does NOT eat those streetfoods

Im talking about fishballs, squidballs, siomai, tokneneng, ALL OF THAT JAZZ

(That’s what happens when yall let a person who never played in the neighbourhood try streetfood) (they get OBSESSED) (I can tell from experience lol)

Then Andrew keeps that footage for blackmail

Just imagine. Kevin Day. Eating. The oiliest. The most unhealthy. Goddamn streetfood

I’ll probably make more :P it was fun to write this!

I would love it if this were liked and reblogged 🥺👉👈 I would appreciate that very much because I spent some time on this and I need validation 🥺🥺

#aftg #tfc #all for the game #the foxhole court #aftg headcanon #tfc headcanon #dan wilds #kevin day #andrew minyard #matt boyd #aaron minyard #allison reynolds #nicky hemmick #renee walker #neil josten #akin #andreil #renison #aftg philippines

67 notes · View notes

moondal514 · 8 months

Note

aftg :) 📓

hi rory!

I can’t remember if I’ve talked about this wip on here yet or not but last year I made this plot outline for an au based on the book The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August by Catherine Webb. It’s pretty long (which is why I haven’t written it lol).

Trigger warning for excessive reincarnation/time loop-style major character death (Andrew dies a lot, often very young) and for mentions of child abuse and csa, per Andrew’s canonical trauma

So Andrew, Neil, and a few other characters are what are called “Ouroborans,” someone who is reborn into their same life over and over again. Per the rules of The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August universe, Ouroborans lived as normal babies until their 4th birthday. Then they get regain what memories of their previous turns at life they remember. Andrew is a special sort of Ouroboran because he remembers everything about every turn of his life he has ever taken thanks to his eidetic memory.

My idea for the fic is that it would be mostly from Andrew’s pov with occasional interludes from Neil.

Andrew’s 1st turn at his life is actually pretty good. He’s adopted at 4 by a pleasant but unremarkable conservative couple. The couple adopted him because they were infertile but thought that having a child was the sort of thing they’re supposed to do cuz blah blah heteronormativity or whatever. They’re not really all that interested in Andrew besides just being able to say that he’s their child and Andrew isn’t really interested in them. And so, he lives a pretty normal, albeit closeted, boring life. Unfortunately he dies young in an accident in college.

In his next life, he gets his memories back at 4 and subsequently becomes way too weird of a child for said conservative couple to adopt. He’s sent right back into the system and so begins his shitty foster care experience. From there Andrew reincarnates often because he usually dies very young from abuse, neglect, and/or straight up accidents. The oldest he lives is usually ~13 years (he doesn’t make it past living a few months with the Spears if he makes it that far) and he is never able to replicate that first life because he becomes a very strange (read: traumatized) child once he gets his memories back and it’s too off-putting for most families to want to adopt him.

This changes when Andrew meets Renee, also an Ouroboran. He learns there’s a whole community of people like him (though he learns that he’s weird for being able to perfectly remember all of his lives, as most Ouroborans only remember basic details about their past lives, but that doesn't surprise him because he already knew that his memory is weird). Of course Andrew’s a cynical little fuck and at first thinks Renee is a quack, so she flat-out stabs him like a badass and gives him a time and place to meet up with her his next life, which he does. Andrew doesn’t really care for any of the others in the Ouroboran community but he likes Renee because he thinks she’s cool. Unfortunately he falls out of contact with her when she gets adopted by Stephanie Walker.

Renee’s presence in Andrew’s life keeps him alive through that time period of his first few months living with the Spears, so for the first time, he lives long enough to learn about Aaron’s existence (which happens similarly to canon). What happens next is a montage of Andrew’s next few lives where he keeps dying in the process of trying to find ways to keep Aaron away from the Spear house. Eventually Andrew decides that the best way he can keep Aaron safe is remove himself from the equation, so he puts himself into juvie. There he meets Betsy, working as a therapist for juvie kids, and learns that she too is an Ouroboran. He strikes up a friendship with her and gets some real therapy for the 1st time in his many lives.

From there, things proceed as canon (except Andrew doesn’t tell Luther about Drake cuz in this au he ain’t telling anyone shit about his abuse) until Tilda’s car accident. Andrew dies in the car with her.

In Andrew’s next life after that, he goes looking for Betsy as soon as he can and basically her influence via phone keeps him alive long enough for things to mostly proceed as canon (with a couple exceptions: Andrew does his best to manipulate events, with Betsy's help, so that Aaron is out of Tilda's care as soon as possible and with the Hemmicks. Andrew also manages to not get arrested for defending Nicky) until PSU. During Andrew’s 1st year, Riko flat-out kills Andrew to get Kevin.

So for a while Andrew’s lives proceed mostly in this same fashion. PSU is the point at which Andrew’s lives get stuck at. If he lived long enough to make it to college, he can’t stop himself from making a deal with Kevin and every time he manages to get himself killed by Riko.

And then: enter Neil.

I’m stopping there because this outline is very long lol

Send me a “📓” emoji and I’ll tell you about a fic wip

#ask tag #mostlymaudlin #moonie writes #aftg

8 notes · View notes

jemej3m · 4 years

Text

legally blonde au?

ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK

imagine:

andrew getting into harvard out of spite because drake told him he’d never be good enough and went and got into harvard and andrew decides fuck you im going to sabotage your lawyer career because you should definitely not be in a courtroom you sadistic fuck

so he goes and gets his ass into law school, helped by betsy (who is definitely paulette) and his med-school brother, and obviously nicky (who is absolutely bruiser).

there he meets a few people, including dan and matt, allison and renee, and of course, neil

who is argumentative and attractive and rebellious and got in on his father’s dime and then oops dad died wonder how that happened (board of execs asking themselves should we really let a mobster’s son be a lawyer???)

together they attract the attention of professor wymack who recruits them to the bench for the murder of kayleigh day, which was pinned on her son, kevin, and all the evidence is pretty clear that it was kevin

but then andrew suspects riko moriyama and his stupid permed hair and his stupid sneer and fucking SLAMS him in the witness box until riko confesses he was trying to shoot kevin because riko was kayleigh’s adopted son and all of her fortunes would have gone just to kevin unless he was dead...

everyone: shook

kevin: free

wigs: snatched

drake: kicked out for sexual misconduct with a professor

andrew: fucking thriving

that’s all i have to say, lol thx bye

#andreil #andrew minyard #neil josten #all for the game #legally blonde au #andrew wearing a pink button-down to court #this is so ridiculous #i had to get it out of my brain

372 notes · View notes

sleepybitchgoddess · 4 years

Text

Top 10 Favorite Characters

So I post here like virtually never/only lurk, but I really wanted to do this because screaming into the void about my faves is my life so here we go.

((Rules)): List 10 of your favorite characters from 10 different fandoms you are in.

((Tagged by)): @thescarlettbinch 🔥

My faves in no particular order? (lowkey hard bc I am currently obsessed with the same 2 things so I had to dig a little bit lol):

Neil Josten (All for the Game--aka my current hyperfixation that I am completely destroyed by. I cannot stop thinking abt Neil and his same three pairs of jorts for 5 minutes this is a curse please send help. I literally want to list so many other characters from aftg so I'm just going to shout out Allison and Andrew here as well for also being iconic and sexxy)

Heather (Total Drama Island--the OG queen of my heart and my secret 8 or 9 year-old crush lol)

Wirt (Over the Garden Wall--this is like a tie with jason funderberker I'm going to be real, but the level I relate to wirt is too strong and it kind of hurts.)

Adam Parrish (The Raven Cycle--I wrote about this man for at least one or college essays; would also apply to be his trophy wife if he was available lol)

Marceline (Adventure Time--this was definitely who I wanted to be like for an extended period of my life and prob would have if I didn't feel like I wasn't allowed to have a true goth/emo phase in middle school)

Nico di Angelo (Percy Jackson--also someone I had a crush on at like age 10, but also just always vibed with him)

Inej Ghafa (Six of Crows--absolutely legendary and deserves her own spin-off book series just about her ventures)

Azula (Avatar: the Last Airbender--I felt so much of this shit growing up as a "gifted kid" and then developing trust issues for the majority of the people around me in my life so oof yea. Also, iconic)

Mabel Pines (Gravity Falls--also reminded me a lot of myself when I was younger and also truly captures the relationship dynamics of having a twin brother)

Helen (The Magnus Archives--her energy, her overall aesthetic, her everything. I def am like 5 episodes behind rn, but I love her so much)

Because I only lurk on here, I'm going to save myself and everyone else the stress of tagging anyone but anyone who sees this is more than free to do it or whatever ✌

7 notes · View notes

xlady-saya · 4 years

Text

I’ve had a love of my own [ch. 4]

Relationships: andrew/neil

Summary: Despite everything Neil could’ve imagined for his life, he never thought he’d be here, finally giving the world the interview they’ve always wanted.

It’s been decades, but even with his numerous accolades and sports wins, he finds that they’re the least important thing about his life.

Neil can’t help but laugh. Andrew would be so annoyed if he were here.

Of course, Neil only wants to talk about him, and the life they spent together.

Tags: interviews, post canon, major character death but not how u think I swear lol, neil is an old man retelling his memories about andrew, cheesy romance, post retirement, see more tags on ao3

Read on ao3!

Rayah hands him tissues, but Neil passes them back.

She needs them.

Blake too, from the snot he's trying to wipe on the back of his hand. Weird, how Neil doesn't necessarily view this as a fond memory, or even the most important one he has to offer. It happened though, but he sees it more as a halfway point.

His journey with Andrew had really only begun, and he hadn't even known. So much time left, not infinite, but vast.

"You must've been so afraid," Rayah says, blowing into the tissue enough for Neil to lean back. He's glad they're there to break up the memory, he's become weak in his old age. Memories of the past can't come back to hurt him, Andrew taught him that.

Still, they can feel like barbed wire around his throat.

"I was," Neil affirms, checking his watch. Sydney will be due back soon, he can't linger much longer. "Andrew's reaction then was almost worse than the one on the court. Andrew was never violent with me, but I'd seen him lose control, I'd seen his rage. It had been so long...that was the first time in a long time he really looked like he wanted to tear the world apart."

Neil finally had a vague idea of what Baltimore was like for everyone else, and he finds himself grinning down at his hands.

"Funny, I was so worried about leaving Andrew," Neil mentions, and watches both Blake and Rayah freeze. When had they started hanging onto his words? He shakes his head, touching the watch on his wrist. "But now I'm here."

At their sad faces, he corrects himself, holding up his hands with a laugh. "No no, I don't see it the way I saw it then!" In fact, he sees it more how Andrew saw it. There was no way for them to be apart after everything they'd been through together. Neil's smile fades, his words serious, and he moves the recorder a little closer. His voice is crystal clear when he says: "Andrew didn't leave me. I was not abandoned."

He could never be abandoned by Andrew. Andrew helped him be at a place where he could never feel that way, and he did the same in return for Andrew. Had Neil gone first, he knows the blond would've managed in much the same way. As much as he would've mourned, he would've had his brother, the rest of their family. All of Neil's excessive Palmetto merch and memorabilia to look after...

They were never each other's answers, just something they didn't want to be without.

"I think I actually ended up being kind of happy, not when he died but later. Andrew's final act was a selfish one. He didn't want to be here without me, so he made sure it wouldn't happen."

Neil finds himself feeling smug, despite his aching. Andrew was someone who always did things for others, despite what he tried to convince people of. Knowing his last act was completely for himself...

Neil couldn't be prouder.

Okay, so he's not going to be able to remain strong. Neil grabs the tissues petulantly, overcome with it. He blames Andrew. "The bastard."

They look away out of respect while he sorts himself out, hands clasped.

Rayah's mascara smears a little when she goes to wipe her red eyes, sticky on her finger, and Blake is so engrossed he doesn't notice when she wipes it against his clean white shirt. He leans forward after a moment, and Neil isn't surprised. A reporter's curiosity is never sated. There's a fire in his eyes, urging Neil on. "What happened next?"

Ha. Now isn't that an interesting question?

Regardless of how terrified Neil felt in the moment, his smile has a smug edge to it when he recalls the night he arrived, the sound of a cane echoing at the back of Neil's head.

He leans back, and keeps his voice low. "They did eventually come."

One night, just as time bleeds over into the next day, there's a click of a lock that reverberates through their entire flat.

Neil instantly knows; the click is akin to a gunshot, a timer going off. No more hiding, nowhere to run.

At least Neil still has some of his reflexes.

Andrew shoots up, knife in hand in half a second, and Neil grabs his own legs like they can save him one last time. No, not himself, Andrew.

His legs, still wrapped up and healing, are not nearly ready for any excessive movements. Neil doesn't care; he throws them over Andrew as quick as he can, and cries out when they land.

It's excruciating.

Movement shouldn't be possible, but Neil has never listened to doctor's orders. The pain is the consequence; it's a blow torch on his tendons, searing every nerve and joint it can. His scream breaks off into strangled gasps, and he feels Andrew halt completely.

It's a dirty trick, but necessary.

Andrew's scowl is almost worse than the blaze of his joints, but Neil doesn't back down. He doesn't weigh much; Andrew could throw him aside with ease. But he won't. Neil's legs are pushed firmly in his lap, resting against his abdomen, pinning Andrew between his own body and the headboard.

There's no way to lunge without hurting Neil, and despite the way Andrew must be weighing the pros and cons of it in his head, Neil is his weak spot. Andrew edges forward in warning, but Neil digs his heels in and whimpers.

"Andrew," he pleads, and the sound from Andrew's throat makes him feel sick.

"Fuck off, Neil," he replies, teeth bared. It's unfair, he gets it. Andrew never got to fight, last time he didn't even know Neil would be taken away. But Neil can't, he just can't--

"No."

Stay down.

Neil wants Andrew to let him fight first, let him try his luck one more time. Andrew's scathing response is cut short by tap of shoes on their hardwood, and they silence themselves, fixated on the door.

Ichirou never follows anyone's schedule but his own. He walks leisurely, calm, and without care for the panic he's caused. His cane clicks offbeat with his footsteps, the sound disjointed and not nearly as polished as the rest of him usually seems.

Neil watches the shadow on the wall grow larger and more distorted, until it finally forms the thin silhouette of the reaper himself.

He never got tired of silk suits, Neil notes. They fit a little better now though; Ichirou has filled them in, not just physically. Neil forgets how young he is, it's been so long since they've seen each other, but he remembers how even someone as menacing and cold as Ichirou had looked new, not yet settled into his role.

That Ichirou is gone.

He walks into the room, ramrod straight and poised, with an air of superiority not many people other than himself and perhaps Allison Reynolds can pull off. It nearly has Neil turning to face him, but he won't, for sake of letting Andrew loose.

Andrew snarls under his breath, but Ichirou's entrance into the room, while dramatic, isn't anything particularly foreboding. In fact, he grabs one of their crappy folding chairs, one Neil's physical therapist uses, and drags it across the room after some consideration. It throws Neil off almost immediately, and the subtle scrape of the chair legs grate on his nerves. However, he hopes it means Ichirou is here to talk.

While Neil knew realistically that would happen, a swift execution wouldn't have surprised him.

Ichirou places the chair down a few feet from them, and the thump of it puts a silencer on the world around them. The street below doesn't dare make a peep. Ichirou regards their positions with an edge of amusement, but lingers on Neil's legs.

"I'll admit I did not know what to expect," he speaks, and his voice reminds Neil of the embers of a fire. Grave, subdued, and ready to be stroked into something far more devastating.

"Lord," Neil replies, and he bows his head despite how much it makes the lump in his throat all the more constricting. "I've been waiting for you."

"I'm sure you have." Ichirou gestures to Neil's legs calmly, and leaves his hand hanging there until Neil looks. Salt in the wound, but Neil does it. "Your father would be happy."

Fury and resentment spike in Neil's chest, and while it may bleed onto his face, it's not much compared to how Andrew tries to lunge forward. All it takes is Neil's wince to stop him, to send him reeling back and torn between checking on him and not taking his eyes off Ichirou.

Neil is glad for his forethought; he wants Andrew to be safe, but even he can't be completely passive. Neil scowls, letting some of the respect melt away.

He can't help it. The cold smile is on his face before he means it to be, and Ichirou inhales sharply. Neil wonders if it's an acknowledgement of one of his own. "Well he's dead, so we'll never know."

He's dead and rotting somewhere, insignificant.

Even when he's hanging on by a thread himself, Neil's comforted by the memory.

Ichirou's eyes narrow, but it's not a threat in his eyes.

"Someone's feeling bold, though I suppose you always are," he says, humming in the back of his throat. "So close to death all your life, nothing to lose. You've never needed my presence to know that."

Neil bites back all he could say, all the things about his life Ichirou wouldn't care about or label as valuable. He has everything to lose now.

"Lord, I know I'm in no position to ask for favors," he says, and Ichirou nods in agreement. Neil's worth and investment potential have run out, if they're going by the bare bones of his contract. Before he can think better of it, he prioritizes what's important. His voice takes on a desperate edge, a critical mistake in front of someone like Ichirou, but unavoidable. "I'm prepared to make my case but—but leave Andrew out of this. He's not—"

A hand finds the back of his neck and squeezes; it's not painful, never painful, but it startles him enough to make him choke on the rest. Andrew's tone rattles against his brain, warning. "If you try to be a martyr in front of me, I'll kill you before he even gets the chance," Andrew bites at him, and Neil glares at the lie. Always a bad liar. But without acknowledging that, Andrew whips around to Ichirou, and his threat has Neil's blood solidifying. On ice, already. "And you, get out of our house."

Neil's hand flies up to squeeze the blond's arm, but he doesn't have the strength to do much. "Andrew."

Ichirou just chuckles, amused as Neil has ever seen him. Instead of threatening Andrew in return or silencing him right then and there, he leans back in the chair, regarding them like they're some species he's never heard of. "You're lucky I'm not here for you. I'm willing to overlook your rudeness because of what I need to say."

Ichirou doesn't so much as glance at Andrew while he says it, nor anytime after, and Neil feels the blond's trembling pour into him. He straightens, watching the careful tap of Ichirou's finger on the cane, and refuses to let himself jolt when those eyes meet his. Darkness meets an ocean blue, and Neil is thankful for the resemblance to his father now. He hopes Ichirou has just as much trouble navigating the sea of his mind, in finding what's locked away.

"Nathaniel," Ichirou begins, then tilts his head. A correction, one that makes Neil hold his breath. "Neil. Given the circumstances, I'm willing to confess a little here. You've always been an enigma to me. For a long time, I did not know whether to label you as a disgusting leech, or the wolf in the henhouse. Or maybe fox is more appropriate. Either way, you're a particularly giant, conniving thorn in my side."

Good, Neil thinks. He never wants to be that known, that easy to pick apart. He never saw himself as a threat though, regardless of his potential, his willingness to claw and bite. Yet, he never took any pleasure in the pain of others unless they deserved it. That was a big difference between him and his father, something that's perhaps hard for Ichirou to wrap his head around.

Neil never asked him before, he realizes. What did Ichirou think of The Butcher?

As if hearing Neil thinking too hard, Ichirou's eyes pierce through him, holding the thoughts hostage, pinning to a wall.

"There's blood on your hands wherever you go," Ichirou muses. "There are nights where I think I should've killed you. You're too dangerous to be let loose, to be kept alive and constantly bearing down on my throat when I don't even realize it. You are the riskiest investment I ever made, and your retirement should be nothing more than an act of charity from the powers above."

Ichirou looks to his cane then, and taps it once, twice against the floor. "I wonder."

He sits there a beat too long to be comfortable, and that's when he reaches into his suit pocket, as if having made up his mind. All Neil sees is the gun, from that point on.

The air in his lungs is ripped clean out, and that's appropriate. He feels like a husk, with Andrew's pleas in his ear to let him up, now Neil, now. But Neil's mind ignores it all, voice tiny and wheezing. "Lord," he tries, but has no idea what to say. "I--"

What? What does he want?

It's the simplest, most pathetic thing. But all he can think is: not in front of Andrew.

Yes, that's it. Neil's panic flares, and it's not his rabbit instincts for once. He doesn't want to be home anymore. He doesn't want to ruin this place they built together, the place they made their home with all their pictures and souvenirs.

He's an idiot, what was he thinking?

He opens his mouth to say as much, and stops short when Ichirou places the gun on his knee. Andrew's gaze tries to melt the thing until it’s molten, and he's just getting more and more frustrated when that doesn't happen. It's still shiny, and very much there. It's so elegant, so unassuming, for being a deliverer of death.

Andrew keeps trying to make Neil budge, to at least move in front of him like a shield, but Neil refuses. His legs cry out in agony, but he'll ignore it until his last breath.

"I'm not done," Ichirou says, and points the gun at them both for good measure before it's back at his side. Neil tracks it up until Ichirou slams his cane on the hardwood, and pulls Neil's gaze back to him. There's a resignation in his gaze Neil doesn't know what to do with, a question not even Neil can parse. And if he can't understand the weight of this, who can?

"I could finally be rid of you. I could wipe the slate clean of yet another risk. You are the only one who threatens me."

Neil bites his tongue; Ichirou's only half speaking to him. Neil wants to argue he would never, there's nothing about that life, the one Ichirou leads, that Neil could want to steal away.

But Ichirou has to know that. Maybe that's the thing he can't wrap his head around, what makes Neil dangerous.

"But it just so happens that some of that blood on your hands was beneficial to me," Ichirou admits, huffing to himself. "Without you and the stress you put on my family's contacts, the animosity towards Riko...I may not have this throne of mine."

Neil chokes on the realization of where this is leading, but doesn't dare to let himself expect it.

Ichirou leans back again, and takes him in with nothing short of disdain. It's the most expressive Neil has ever seen him, the cool veneer stripped away.

"Make no mistake, I am not giving you credit, not even an ounce of it," Ichirou spits out, then he closes his eyes, breathing in to regain a shred of the composure he had when he walked in. Neil doesn't care, he's too busy staring at the furrow in his brow, at the retreating gun. Ichirou's eyes meet his and they're blazing, but the ring of fire doesn't scathe him. Neil seems to be the one point it can't reach. "You don't deserve it. But with your father gone, with my enemies and all those squabbling liabilities rotting in the ground...I can move freely."

He puts away the gun, as slow and conflicted as the movement is. But it's gone. Hidden. Neil's last stroke of luck. May he never be in need of more.

Andrew sneers, unable to help himself. "That sounds like plenty of credit is due."

Any other moment, Neil would wheeze, would fear retaliation. But Ichirou's just shown him his decision, a mind made up. He won't go back on it once he's crossed that line. It's not in his nature.

Funny. No matter how depraved the code of ethics is, it's still there, clean and outlined.

Ichirou stands, contempt clear as he stares down at them. "Think of this as repayment instead, a courtesy if you will," he mutters. "This will close out our account officially. There are some terms. I'll be happy to take that remaining 80% of your pension, your severance, but after? I want nothing to do with you."

The last syllable is laced with thin disgust, but then Ichirou retreats back into himself. The mask returns, an icy veil which emotions don't stand a chance against.

And well, Neil's always been a little stupid. He exhales shakily, his lungs aching from being so deprived. "You...you're letting me go?"

"I'm letting you become someone else's burden," Ichirou glances at Andrew, at the way his fists are still clenched around Neil. "But do not think me merciful."

He could never.

He understands their relationship, or rather, the end of it. That doesn't stop Ichirou from making it exceedingly clear.

His voice fills the room, coating the walls and staining it. It's not as bad as blood, but it's a promise Neil won't soon remove, a reminder that if he wants to keep this home of his, he'll listen. "I’ll extend the courtesy to your companions if they’re ever in the same situation. But if I ever see you again, if I hear that you're involved in anything, from the smallest transaction or negotiation in my circle, in my empire, I will kill you all," Ichirou explains, a vow. Then, his gaze flickers over Andrew one last time, and yes, Neil understands perfectly. He shows it in the way he glares, in the way he calls on his father's ghost one last time. "I will do more than kill you, I will destroy everything about you."

The fear begins to trickle out of him, and maybe that's a bad thing where Neil is concerned. He's not sure what he's exuding right then, but he can feel himself stop shaking, can feel his chin tilt up in a challenge. It's a deceptive calm, but one Ichirou will read correctly.

Acknowledgement, respect, but underneath all that it's a boast. It says I won.

Neil's not sure it can be called that but he owns it, with all his infuriating confidence, he owns it, and makes sure Ichirou knows there will always be some truth to it.

Even if Neil didn't have to convince him, even if Ichirou came to the conclusion all on his own.

He was bested, and Neil has to squash the smile that wants to bloom on his face.

Andrew stops shaking too, his rage reigned in for now. He probably won't sleep for days regardless; the fear, the what ifs...they're too fresh and heavy.

But that's alright. More than alright. Because Neil can spend the rest of their lives making it up to him.

"Do we have a deal?" Ichirou states, like he needs to. But Neil nods anyways. It's a farewell he didn't know he wanted so badly.

"Yes, we do," he says, and adds reluctantly: "Thank you, Lord."

Ichirou inclines his head, and Neil has to bite back any sass. It's a look that says 'don't thank me yet. Don't thank me until you're old and gray.'

With that final warning, Ichirou turns away, and neither of them dare to move.

That's where the acknowledgement ends; Ichirou reaches the door, and without looking back, solidifies his exit from Neil's life.

"Goodbye, Neil Josten."

They don't move at first. They listen to the disjointed steps as Ichirou leaves, and only when it sinks in that he's walking away does Neil feel Andrew pull him gently closer. It's a fierce hold regardless, an attempt to carve Neil a place in his chest to hide. It's 'I've got you' and 'I get to keep you' all at once.

When the lock on their front door clicks shut, the one to Neil's future opens wide.

Neil lets Blake and Rayah take their time scribbling their notes, neither of them daring to ask for clarification. Neil hopes it's because there's nothing to clarify.

It's too simplistic to say he won some climactic battle, that the rest of his life was carefree and happy. This was merely a pause in his life, a blip in time which also passed like everything else, drowned out with visits to Germany and difficult trips to the vet.

Neil doesn't view it as the middle, or a turning point. He doesn't view anything that way. He started his life as Neil Josten and it flowed from there, choppy and untamed at times, but no less...memorable.

His encounter with Ichirou was a moment he had to wait, to breathe in and take in what he had before he kept going. A log or dam that eventually eroded away like the rest of the obstacles he faced.

And there was so, so much more that came after that.

Perhaps not as exciting; family vacations, Exy games, and weekend getaways are hardly anything compared to run-ins with the mafia, to devastating injuries and comebacks. No one wants to hear about the petty arguments and compromises, the bouts of depression which came from being robbed of the sport he loved despite his survival. There's nothing riveting about the quiet dinners Neil enjoyed with Andrew at his side every night for over thirty years after.

But even still, he's waiting to get to those. He wants to talk about those.

Each time he finishes a memory, he's antsy to tell the next one. It's the most exciting thing to him, knowing that even when it all stops, when he has nothing more he needs to share, that nothing ever ended. He could go on and on. As long as he’s breathing, he can say more.

It doesn't end until he's gone, and how sneaky he is, how brilliant, for even going beyond that to preserve their life, every boring piece of it.

He sends Andrew a smug little smile, just for that.

So now people can know, for at least a few years to come, that yes, Neil Josten survived the mafia. But more importantly, Andrew Minyard was next to him, and was just about the best companion Neil could've asked for.

It makes him smile, uncontrolled in its entirety, and when Sydney walks in she doesn't even ask. She returns it, and that fondness makes Neil feel as if Andrew is still in the room, because it was so often directed at him as well.

When she leaves, the room is quiet apart from the last fading scratches of pen on paper.

Occasionally one of the reporters will look up at him, scan him as if they can get the residual emotions hanging from his aura and paste them onto the messy pages.

Neil doesn't envy them.

He's never been a writer, and he's giving them a daunting task. Vague, but detailed. Powerful, but without all the flowery, over-exaggerated nonsense. This is not a sensationalist piece, but his life, and while they've been treating him with the respect he asked for, he gets the feeling they just now came to the realization fully.

It's easy to say you love someone, at the end of the day. Even if it's a lie, even if it takes you a while to work up the courage for it. It's easy to repeat it over and over again.

But for people to understand the full scope of Neil's feelings, so far beyond that word with all the strange deviations and intricacies...

Well, he can tell by the way Rayah and Blake come to a standstill, eyes fixed on their notes, that they do understand. That's what makes it so difficult, that's what makes it impossible.

Nothing they do or write will truly replicate the way Neil has made them feel, the way Andrew made Neil feel.

And Neil's grateful for that. He's grateful, because he always knew deep down that his relationship with Andrew was not something anyone would be able to capture and define. It was theirs.

As long as that's obvious, then he thinks it'll be more than okay.

He'll keep providing all the details they need to compensate.

Eventually, when they do look up, Rayah just laughs, smoothing her hand over the paper. Neither of them make a move for their food. "I—I don't know what to ask anymore?" She frames it as a question, tone searching, and when she looks at Blake, he merely shrugs.

There's a mistiness in his eyes when he turns to Neil too, as if to ask, 'well?'

Neil beams brighter, bringing his food in front of him. Ten years and he hasn't changed the order. It's still the plate he and Andrew split.

And with that warmth in his chest, he's more than happy to take it from there.

"Don't worry," he says, amusement lacing his tone. "I know what comes next."

#aftg #all for the game #andreil #andrew minyard #neil josten

14 notes · View notes

fallingin-like · 4 years

Text

november 17

above the clouds by @gluupor [requested by @fuzzballsheltiepants]

see which other fics i’m reviewing this month! / my review request post!

this is an absolutely amazing fic that features airships, android!neil, and fantastic world-building. it’s a really fun and adventurous read, but still contains enough angst to break your heart. if you haven’t read this yet, drop everything and read it now. if you have read it, read it again.

okay i enjoyed this fic so much that i cannot put it in words. i remember when i first read it, i always get so excited when i see that you’ve posted and i read it in an hour, the time passing by so quickly. i couldn’t pull myself away and was reluctant to go back to real life after i finished reading. all your characters are so entertaining and as always, are integrated so nicely into this au.

things that stood out to me:

”over the khazak grass plains, year 1424 new era (ne), january” i just think that this adds a lot to the story so efficiently. we have a location and time and i just feel like this sort of title/header establishes a tone (makes me feel a steampunk/sci-fi kind of vibe). i’d be interested in how you came up with which locations and years to use?

”andrew shut off the engines and revelled in the silence. he could still hear the mechanical noises that resulted from keeping the gasbag at the appropriate pressure to maintain their altitude, but it was as quiet as it got aboard an airship.” i love this, mostly because i can relate to it? i’m really used to driving with music on, but lately i’ve been turning off the radio and driving in silence which is a really interesting experience, especially since i drive an electric car for work which is really quiet most of the time. also it introduces us to the airship!

”neil would eventually man the flight deck for night watch as he didn’t require any sleep” i am immediately invested in this version of neil and want to know EVERYTHING that he is capable of doing

andrew is wearing a scarf that nicky knitted for him!!! that is adorable! both nicky doing this for andrew, but also andrew wearing it!

your description of the monster is amazing. i would love to explore it. on the ground though (i am afraid of heights and not as brave as andrew lol) i saw that you were inspired by the mortal engine series and i can definitely see aspects of this both here and in later portions of the fic although i only watched the movie which was… interesting haha. were there any other sources of inspiration? i found that this reminds me a little of the films ‘alita, battle angel’, and a little bit of ‘castle in the sky’ as well

having little glowing things in their lamps instead of fire? woah that’s so cool

”neil was futzing around inside it with a tiny screwdriver” LOVE the word futzing. i’ve not heard it before, but it feels right. also it’s kind of cute that they are all helping each other out on the ship

algae bricks and beetle bricks? do they just,,, bite into it? because that feels so chaotic to me. lol mix into water and make it into mush? i am currently very grateful for the food i have

”jealous, aaron? don’t worry; i’ll come service you once i’ve got andrew settled tonight.” NEIL, YOU’RE GOING TO BE THE DEATH OF ME

”’better do it in the reclaimer,’ said kevin, taking him literally. ‘we need to preserve water if we’re headed to palmetto before our next resupply.’” one of the many things that i love about your writing is your amazing characterization of mr kevin day. what a legend

”he wasn’t entirely sure why he wasn’t telling the others about wymack’s summons; there was something about it that put him on edge and he wanted to keep it to himself for now.” oh nO this is bad news!! you did a great job of introducing this undercurrent of worry into a scene that had just been so light and funny

“‘yes, i did,’ said andrew, keeping his voice steady. ‘last week before we headed into the plains.’” my stomach dropped at this point, memory problems are always so scary because it’s so hard to tell what the source of the problem is. andrew’s calmness is directly contrasting this, but it feels like it takes effort which is even scarier!

”andrew had spent his childhood shutting down any emotions. they’d been a liability in the type of life he’d led” and ”he had been destined for a short life with a brutal end. sometimes that seemed preferable to how much caring about other people could hurt. he often cursed those responsible for how his life had changed” ahhh this is so sad, but also really soft? because he’s come so far? and he’s opened himself up and let himself be vulnerable by caring

hearing the backstory of the twins is so interesting to me, you do a great job at both establishing this world that these characters are living in and how they fit in with it

”andrew was left with little choice but to do something nice to shut him up” i think this is one of the most andrew-like sentences to be ever written haha

”by all rights he should have died in the slums, but instead-and andrew was never sure exactly how he’d done it-he’d attached himself to andrew and aaron, like a barnacle that they couldn’t remove and grudgingly came to care about” cute!!! the tone is really andrew-like too

woah all these languages are pretty cool! i like the idea of having a common trading language, and the idea of having mandonese and spanglish is interesting.

”that seedy is mine” I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND THIS AT FIRST BUT THIS IS SO FUNNY. lowkey reminds me of the lego movie haha. also seems fitting of kevin to collect ancient artifacts, even if he doesn’t really know what they do

ANDREW AND AARON AS GANG LEADERS YES PLEASE. i absolutely love it when people have such a great reputation. very exciting to hear that drake is not going to be an issue in this fic!!! wait a second… andrew and aaron were 16? so small!

hmmm i am interested how kevin got stuck in shanghai?

bad news that wymack is asking neil to stay on the ship. all this mystery and hiding is making me feel like things are not looking so good

”he’d forgotten again that it was bee whom andrew wanted him to see” NOOOOO

ohmygoodness the usbee. do they pronounce it uzz-bee? because that’s definitely how i picture them saying it and it is so funny to me.

”i informed you that people are after you because i actually care about what happens to you, you miserable little gremlin” i really can never say it enough, but i love the way you use affectionate insults like this so so much.

”’oh, you know,’ said andrew idly, ‘those that slay together slay together.’” NO BIG DEAL.

”a nobody who got the drop on you. better luck next time” NEIL I KNOW THAT YOU REALLY CAN’T HELP IT BUT PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF AROUND SOMEONE WHO YOU KNOW IS SO DANGEROUS

”’this time, it was eavesdropping,’ said neil brightly” he’s so enthusiastic!! cute!!

”how do you travel now?” i am also interested in this!! for all i know, he just slides through shadows and pops up wherever andrew is haha

”neil flicked his fingers dismissively. andrew’s eyes narrowed at the performance. he wasn’t this dramatic, was he?” i am very sorry to break it to you, but andrew minyard you are one of the most dramatic people ever

ooooh dang neil is good. does his android body not process poison? also where did he get the knowledge that andrew was going to be set up anyway?

”within a few hours neil had forgotten the whole conversation, but he retained the knowledge that andrew had forced him to see bee and wasn’t happy about it” noooo why is this happening, it’s so heartbreaking to see neil forgetting things (also feels extra-bad because alzheimer’s runs in my family and this could definitely be me in the future which is Scary) and i Hate when andrew and neil are fighting because andrew is just trying to take care of neil!!! ;-;

”mickey, the mouse-shaped god of old america” OHMYGOODNESS

as startling it must have been to andrew, hearing about the moriyamas previously owning neil, i’m curious what was going through neil’s mind during this conversation. it must be so disorienting, not remembering your past. all of a sudden, you just started existing

”’shoot them. escape on the monster,’ said andrew. that was their usual plan for hostility they didn’t want to deal with.” i mean, i guess that’s a pretty solid plan. LOL

ohmygoodness katelyn also having red hair and blue eyes? “andrew always pretended not to notice that he and aaron had suspiciously similar taste in people, gender notwithstanding” LOLOL

”neil’s tension was ratcheting higher the longer they stayed in the region, something which he wouldn’t explain to andrew’s satisfaction.” ahhhh we! need! better! communication! what is neil hiding?

I HATE THAT NATHAN IS GOOD AT ACTING. YOU MAKE ME WANT TO BELIEVE HIM SO BAD EVEN THOUGH I KNOW HE’S LIKE SUPER SUPER EVIL AND IS GOING TO HURT EVERYONE NEIL AND ANDREW KNOW.

thank you andrew for knowing better and for always thinking ahead. i feel like i can really trust you to take care of neil (and you, gluupor to take care of these characters even if sometimes you break my heart while doing so)

andrew: mawp mawp mawp mawp mawp mawp (LOVE THIS)

”wymack had always said it was because andrew had a death wish but it was really just because he liked going fast” this is really cute! both in this fic and in the series, andrew is like this and he had so little enjoyment as a child, was forced to grow up so quickly, and i’m grateful that he gets to have these little things

”’’M not,’ muttered andrew, too hot to put any effort into lying” so cute!!!

”stop and take a look? sure, why not? i don’t think we’ve got anything else pressing taking up our time right now” I CANNOT GET OVER HOW FUNNY THIS FIC IS

”’old news,’ said aaron. ‘we’ve moved on. now we’ve decided to crash into the sea’” it turns out that sometimes i actually really like aaron! now is one of those times.

oh my goodness, neil speaking only spanglish and BITING. “neil spat several curses at him before literally spitting as well�� the scary thing is, this is still in character for neil haha

that’s so sweet of wymack to give andrew his ship!! ahh he’s such a soft character and i’m glad that all the foxes have someone who is taking care of them

what a beautiful way to wrap up this fic! also i feel strangely glad that nathan wasn’t actually the one to invent the tech needed to create neil. he’s too gross and evil to create such an intricate and wonderful person like neil.

BURIED IN ASH FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS WHAT

WAIT VALLEY OF SILICA LOL

oh dang yellowstone supervolcano. i’ve learned a tiny tiny bit about that and it’s actually pretty scary thinking about the consequences of it erupting and also knowing there is basically nothing we can do to stop that from happening and also very little we can do to predict it

andrew and neil are so so cute ahhh

also quick shoutout to the amazing art featured in this fic! so beautiful.

i love the flashbacks that you include. they provide valuable information and understanding of how the characters have developed, but it also gives a bit of a break from the intensity of the main plot. we get a little time to breathe and recover.

as the story travelled to different areas of the world, it was really interesting to see how you included history into it. i think my favourite story was the volcano and the ash-winter that followed. kind of scary to think of the possibility of that actually happening, because even though we have pretty cool tech, i don’t think things would go well. you do such a great job with your world-building, i never found myself confused about what was happening, the geography of it, the new tech, and the politics. i loved how you were able to smoothly include canon events/characters/things and have it work so well within this au.your descriptions are so so good and make this fic really immersive, i feel like i’m experiencing them with the characters.

definitely one of my favourite things about your writing is how you consistently do such an amazing job of incorporating humour and little character quirks into the fic. it really shows how much skill and talent you have because it’s always effortless and reads so easily. it fits well with the characterization and tone of your fics. i will forever be a fan of your dialogue and all the interactions between everyone seemed so realistic.

i’m continually impressed by your consistently marvelous storytelling. you manage to captivate me no matter what subject you choose. thank you so much for writing this!!

#above the clouds #aftg fic review #raelle writes

38 notes · View notes